First Bite of Whale
00:06:19
► 00:00:00
And here's the chef in the back, preparing for dinner.
► 00:00:10
And the reason he's preparing for dinner is this.
► 00:00:13
On X, I recently posted that I'd rather eat whales and pandas than crickets and worms.
► 00:00:19
And someone who's been following me for a very long time, don't know her very well, said, look, I'll bring whale meat to Romania.
► 00:00:26
So I told her if she can get whale meat to Romania, there's a cash bonus.
► 00:00:31
So I've hired the chef today.
► 00:00:32
She's landed. She has the whale meat in tow.
► 00:00:34
She's on her way here right now.
► 00:00:36
And I'm about to eat whales.
► 00:00:37
One, because I want to try whale meat.
► 00:00:39
Looks delicious. Two, Because I've got to hook my boys up with some whale meat every once in a while.
► 00:00:44
Get whale power. And three, because it's going to really, really piss off the environmentalists.
► 00:00:49
So it's whale for dinner tonight Hello
► 00:01:15
How are you?
► 00:01:16
Dinner has arrived guys This is my whale choreo.
► 00:01:20
We're going to blur her face for the sake of the internet.
► 00:01:22
But she's bought me whale meat all the way from Norway.
► 00:01:25
I do, actually. Hey, you want me to meet you?
► 00:01:27
I'd like to meet you, too.
► 00:01:29
So I do have the...
► 00:01:32
This is like a tiny surprise, a little gift.
► 00:01:34
Oh, a little gift. Like whale salami.
► 00:01:37
And this is the whale meat.
► 00:01:38
Beautiful. Here we go.
► 00:01:41
Let me deliver it to the chefs.
► 00:01:42
And then I owe you some money I believe So I'm gonna share the whale with everyone
► 00:02:09
This is whale salami.
► 00:02:10
Come here. Some of the guys are here.
► 00:02:13
Alright guys. Whale salami.
► 00:02:16
Nice. Is it like a...
► 00:02:19
Right here. It's made of whale.
► 00:02:23
Hello. Hello, gentlemen.
► 00:02:26
Nice to meet you. Thank you. Is it banging?
► 00:02:28
I can't eat that. Bro!
► 00:02:30
You can only guess this is three countries in the whole world.
► 00:02:33
We need whales, bro.
► 00:02:35
No, we don't. Fuck whales.
► 00:02:36
This whale's not needed.
► 00:02:38
Name one whale you're friends with.
► 00:02:40
If I eat that... Did you miss this guy?
► 00:02:42
Eat the fucking whale. Eat the whale.
► 00:02:45
It's alright. It tastes like salami.
► 00:02:47
It's an interesting taste.
► 00:02:48
Bro, I will gladly take some whale.
► 00:02:50
You got them. Say like four.
► 00:02:53
No. Bro, it just tastes like salami.
► 00:02:55
No, wait for the aftertaste. That's what I'm saying.
► 00:02:56
It just tastes like salami. No, there is an aftertaste.
► 00:02:59
Yo. The aftertaste is unique.
► 00:03:01
That's something that's not in...
► 00:03:02
I've never tasted that before. I don't eat pork, so...
► 00:03:05
What the fuck does a whale have to do with a pig?
► 00:03:07
Because they said it tastes like pork.
► 00:03:08
I don't know if it tastes like pork.
► 00:03:10
Oh, shit, this is pork.
► 00:03:12
I mixed them up. Fuck. Whales are the most overrated animal.
► 00:03:39
Everyone's like, oh, the whales, the whales.
► 00:03:40
Whales don't pay your rent.
► 00:03:42
Whales aren't cute. They're not small.
► 00:03:44
They're not fluffy. You've never even stroked a whale.
► 00:03:47
You love puppies or whatever.
► 00:03:49
Cool. You've never even probably seen a whale.
► 00:03:50
If you have, it's been in SeaWorld or far in the distance, considering whether it eats you and your entire family.
► 00:03:55
Everyone says they live on plankton.
► 00:03:56
There's no fucking way something that big lives on plankton.
► 00:03:58
That's a conspiracy. Definitely eats humans.
► 00:04:00
100%. Now we eat them back.
► 00:04:03
First bite of whale. That's beef.
► 00:04:06
Fuck well. Why are you making a weird taste?
► 00:04:17
It's good, it's a new taste though.
► 00:04:20
It's a new type of meat, yeah.
► 00:04:22
It doesn't taste like beef or anything else, it tastes unique.
► 00:04:26
It tastes gamey.
► 00:04:40
Yeah, it tastes gamey.
► 00:04:42
Tastes like liver. There you go.
► 00:04:45
The most similar meat, venison, is a bit like whale.
► 00:04:48
Tastes like liver. Whale's interesting.
► 00:04:50
Alright, so, what's the verdict?
► 00:04:54
I'm super happy that I'm eating a whale.
► 00:04:57
Because I know people on the internet are going to be mad at me for this.
► 00:05:00
And be like, you're setting a bad example because we need to preserve the whales.
► 00:05:03
We don't. We need to preserve just enough whales to eat.
► 00:05:07
Maybe we should start farming whales.
► 00:05:09
How big would a whale farm have to be?
► 00:05:11
But I'm down for keeping them in small underwater cages, you know.
► 00:05:14
I'm not against those kind of farming methods.
► 00:05:17
I'm gonna add some taste. Tristan's Free Range Whale Farm.
► 00:05:23
Buy some ocean and just make it one big track where they have to swim around in circles all day.
► 00:05:28
Sprinkle a bit of plankton on top.
► 00:05:33
Nice. Business genius.
► 00:05:36
Andrew, do you have any final words about the whales?
► 00:05:41
No. Save the whales.
► 00:05:45
Marcel, what do you think of the whales?
► 00:05:47
They're the most majestic animal in the animal kingdom.
► 00:05:51
What you guys are doing is outrageous.
► 00:05:53
I can't believe it. I can't believe it.
► 00:05:57
You're shocked in awe. It doesn't even taste good, but I'm gonna eat it all to upset some environmentalists.
► 00:06:02
Yeah, I'm gonna eat as much whale as possible.
► 00:06:04
Tastes like liver. Exactly like liver, that's what it tastes like.
► 00:06:07
I bet it makes you strong. Whales can't make you weak.
► 00:06:09
You may hate them, but they are objectively probably, this is probably the strongest animal I've ever eaten.
► 00:06:13
Normally I'd agree with you, but you just had a bite and you look weak, so...
► 00:06:17
You just had a bite and you look weak.
Never Lost A Game
00:03:50
► 00:06:19
Well, I've built this one. I've never lost a game.
► 00:06:21
I've never lost a game. Ask them.
► 00:06:24
Never lost a game, not one.
► 00:06:26
Are you talking about Uno? Never lost a game.
► 00:06:32
Built different.
► 00:06:34
Why would I not talk about Uno?
► 00:06:38
Go on. If you think you're a bad man, say something.
► 00:06:42
We'll play right after this.
► 00:06:45
Right after this!
► 00:06:47
That's right, shake your head.
► 00:06:49
Walk away!
► 00:06:53
Why are you drinking coffee at midnight?
► 00:06:59
I'm built different. Perhaps you didn't know that, Bailey, but you should.
► 00:07:03
When they built everybody, he decided to build me differently.
► 00:07:06
So I need coffee so I have the energy to relax.
► 00:07:09
You understand? No, it's not a thing.
► 00:07:12
I can't sleep without the caffeine boost required.
► 00:07:16
You never sleep, and this is probably why you never sleep.
► 00:07:19
This is not okay. Sounds to me like you're fucking up then.
► 00:07:22
Because you're sleeping, and I don't need to.
► 00:07:25
Wasting your life away, aren't you, Bailey?
► 00:07:27
Sleeping in bed, sitting around, being a nerd, wearing glasses.
► 00:07:32
Not me. Feel different.
► 00:07:33
If I started drinking coffee at midnight, you think it'd heal my eyes?
► 00:07:37
Might fix your neck. Admit it!
► 00:07:43
Admit it! I've never lost a game of Uno.
► 00:07:47
It's impossible for me to lose.
► 00:07:48
The math doesn't add up.
► 00:07:51
What is six plus nine?
► 00:07:54
Fifteen. One and five.
► 00:08:00
Think about it.
► 00:08:01
One and five.
► 00:08:03
All bases covered.
► 00:08:05
One and five sounds like your record.
► 00:08:07
One to five.
► 00:08:08
One win, five losses.
► 00:08:09
I have never lost a game of Uno.
► 00:08:12
Name a game I lost.
► 00:08:14
You were all playing Uno, sitting around, having fun.
► 00:08:16
I turned up and said, don't give me cards.
► 00:08:18
You gave me cards. I said, guys, don't let me win.
► 00:08:21
I said it. First game was kind of hard.
► 00:08:24
Dodger put up a good fight. You too.
► 00:08:29
Bro, easy.
► 00:08:30
Easy street. Easy street.
► 00:08:33
Admit it. Bailey, admit it.
► 00:08:35
Maybe it's the coffee. No, maybe you need to go read the Bible again and learn something about yourself.
► 00:08:41
On what page does it say Bailey's a loser?
► 00:08:45
Which page? Which chapter?
► 00:08:47
I don't think it says that in the Bible.
► 00:08:48
Well, maybe you need to decipher it like the Da Vinci Code.
► 00:08:51
One, five, work it out somewhere.
► 00:08:53
It's there somewhere. Shit glasses.
► 00:08:56
Can't play Uno. Top G. Never lost a game.
► 00:09:00
Undefeated. I'll do it again.
► 00:09:01
You think I'm scared of you? We'll play again right now.
► 00:09:03
And I will win again.
► 00:09:05
All on the line. Let's go!
► 00:09:06
Let's do it. I'm Bill Differin.
► 00:09:11
That's all I think, man.
► 00:09:13
Don't make that a thing.
► 00:09:14
This is a thing. No, it's not.
► 00:09:15
This is a thing for women's.
► 00:09:18
I got to the final. Is this a thing?
► 00:09:22
Look at me. I can't.
► 00:09:24
Look at me doing this move.
► 00:09:25
I can't. I lost the final.
► 00:09:27
I'm upset. I'm upset.
► 00:09:29
First time in history I've ever...
► 00:09:33
Well, I came first.
► 00:09:37
But you won. But I came first.
► 00:09:40
Did you lose that game? I've never lost a game.
► 00:09:42
He won, but I came first. I like that move.
► 00:09:48
Can you show it to me again?
► 00:09:50
One more time. One more time.
► 00:09:52
Can you see?
► 00:09:57
You can double it up.
► 00:10:00
Why is Uno a thing?
► 00:10:05
Who balled Uno? He's the real boss.