| Time | Text |
|---|---|
|
Who's Allowed to Drink?
00:06:18
|
|
| 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, get jammed! | |
| Oh my God! | |
| Good shot, man! | |
| Good shot, man! | |
| I think I'm gonna take that. | |
| So what happened to the car rally? | |
| What happened? | |
| It started bruising. | |
| Go around and check, Jake, go around and check. | |
| Time just kind of got away from us. | |
| We just like teleported and now we're in Poland. | |
| Now we're in Warsaw and we're going to start our own car rally because I brought cars to Warsaw to meet us here because we didn't get to do it in Ibiza because we were too busy boozing. | |
| Woah, Luke had a gin and tonic. | |
| Luke had one gin and tonic. I did have a gin and tonic. | |
| Welcome to Warsaw. So now we're in Warsaw. | |
| Welcome to Warsaw. Is this our life? | |
| Yes. Is it just different places? | |
| I'm Polish, man. You make half a million dollars a month. | |
| Yeah. What else is doing what we're doing? | |
| You were Italian just a bit ago. | |
| That was Italian, man. Yeah, you're speaking Polish. | |
| Translate that in the comment section. | |
| Guys, they have dumplings from 1913. | |
| I'm ordering. Same recipe. I'm ordering. | |
| Tapas? No, I just want the dumplings. | |
| They sell like a selection board here. | |
| Various different flavors. | |
| Is that vodka? | |
| Yeah. It's a bunch of different boxes. | |
| Hello. Who's only? | |
| Who's only? No, I want the dumplings. | |
| No, I don't want them. With fruit. | |
| They do dumplings with fruit. Andrew, our viewers on Tate Confidential always say that I make Luke drink too much. | |
| I have a new beer. How many beers on the table? | |
| Two. Luke isn't allowed to drink ever again. | |
| Starting now. My old number. | |
| Look at the jealous look on his face as I sip my beer. | |
| I'm 0% jealous. That beer doesn't look good. | |
| You look so jealous. | |
| I know. Look at all the fruit and beautiful things for me to say. | |
| You're clearly jealous. | |
| I'm not jealous of you, man. I don't see the pleasure. | |
| I don't see it. It's okay. | |
| You're not allowed to drink it. Ever, ever again. | |
| That's the new you. Luke is not allowed to drink it. | |
| Agreed. | |
| Fuck it. | |
| There is nothing that does not improve the engine, and the applications are simple and | |
| easy to use. | |
| Luke's a hot drink, but we are. | |
| I never was. No. | |
| Although I will admit, all right, take all my time, I'll admit fully here. | |
| This does look fun. It does look fun. | |
| Who's allowed to drink? Who's allowed to drink all out? | |
| I've been around and Luke is allowed to drink. | |
| I need a chaser. Well, a mixer, mix it down like beer. | |
| That's not a chaser. | |
| It is. Beer is just water. | |
| Beer is just water. I don't know. | |
| Do you like water? Yeah. | |
| Wash that booze down. It's a nice refreshing beer. | |
| Woo! Woo! | |
| Who can't drink? Who can't drink? | |
| Who can't drink? So, Tristan, give him a stalker. | |
| I'm a total stalker. It's got a message saying, are you in front of the hotel course office? | |
| And my car is dead. She goes, yeah, wait there three minutes. | |
| I said, three minutes? What are you talking about? | |
| For what? For me, I want to teach you. | |
| I'm stalking you, yeah. | |
| Show these to the camera. No one believes this. | |
| These are real messages. | |
| Nice. So some girl is messaging us knowing where we are. | |
| And he's saying, I need to meet you, I need to meet you. | |
| Yeah. And now she's come to the bar of our hotel, and he keeps messaging me. | |
| So we're all going downstairs in case it's a dude in his hands. | |
| Yep. Because it might be hands. | |
| It might be hands, I don't know. So we're going to do something. | |
| Wait a minute. Let's just accept my request. | |
| Let's. Not bad. | |
| Stalk this dick. Stalk me. | |
| You're stalking me, hub. | |
| So... | |
| So everyone knows it's not bullshit. | |
| I'm gonna go to the bathroom. | |
| I'm gonna go to the bathroom. | |
| So I have to ask the toilet seat people. | |
| And I need that. | |
| I need that. | |
| Tristan, you want to marry a doctor? | |
| Tristan, you should. | |
| I'm not going to say anything. | |
| You know, it's just, yeah, perfect. | |
| So, what else? | |
| My brother's really interested in you. | |
| She's curious. Yeah, yeah. | |
| I can see. He's curious. | |
| No, on the way down the stairs. | |
| I didn't know who you are. | |
| I thought you were a stalker. | |
| On the way down the stairs. A stalker? | |
| No, on the way down the stairs. No, I thought you were. | |
|
Chilling in Moscow
00:09:39
|
|
| She was saying, I get this energy from her and I feel like it will be forever. | |
| I didn't say that. Honey. | |
| He did. He did. | |
| He did. | |
| I ended up cutting so much for him. | |
| He's just shy. | |
| Yeah. | |
| My brother's naked. | |
| He's shy. | |
| That is not true. | |
| He's shy. | |
| That's not true. | |
| Yeah, I'm just kidding. | |
| He's shy. | |
| I think you two should. | |
| Should we leave you two alone? | |
| We have to go. | |
| You want to come with us wherever we go? | |
| I would like to have a drink. | |
| You're very welcome. Sure, no problem. | |
| My brother is actually very rich. | |
| I think you and him will go on purpose. You know what? | |
| Someone just DM'd me. | |
| Hey, is your life actually that good? | |
| And I'm sitting there thinking, is my life actually that good? | |
| I mean, I look to the outside world like I have it all, but do I really have it all? | |
| So I decided to give him a breakdown of my last seven days of my life. | |
| Last seven days of my life. | |
| I'm supposed to be going on a supercar rally. | |
| Supercar rally gets canceled. | |
| charter plane to Ibiza Stay the seven pines is over the most luxurious hotels in the world | |
| Oh you Oh I'm chilling in Ibiza. Every single dinner. | |
| Two grand. Three grand. | |
| Four grand. I spent 25,000 euros in Ibiza. | |
| I'm chilling, right? This bitch hit me up on Instagram. | |
| One of my exes. You know, they can't forget about me. | |
| She's like, come to Moscow. Come to Moscow. | |
| I'm like, bitch, Putin won't let me in Moscow. | |
| It's COVID. I can't get a visa. | |
| She's like, please come. | |
| I see a picture of her big ass titties. | |
| I'm like, I love old Moscow. | |
| Hit the war room. War room. | |
| I need documents. Bang, bang, bang, bang. | |
| Got a guy in Moscow. I now work for his company. | |
| Boom, boom, boom. Get the visa. | |
| Bang. I go to Moscow. I'm pumping this hoe. | |
| Walking around Red Square and shit. | |
| Like a G. Finished there. | |
| Private plane to Warsaw, Poland. | |
| And I thought, you know what? The supercar ride will cancel. | |
| I haven't driven in a while. When I get to Poland, I want a car. | |
| One phone call two of my 17 supercars from Bucharest Romania. Don't pull the truck and brought it to Warsaw I get to the five-star hotel I've got two supercars waiting for me out front. | |
| I land here, I tag myself, and then some Polish mofo slides into my DMs because they heard I'm a disease and makes me have to go out here with those two bitches. | |
| Wake up. | |
| Wake up, you son of a bitch. | |
| Wake up. | |
| Wake up. | |
| Woke up this morning. | |
| Pushed the bitch out of the way, went to the fucking song on our bitch, show the Boston. | |
| Combo Went to the gym, drove around the city until the police stopped me, went to Louis Vuitton, bought some shit And it's Friday, what are we doing tonight? | |
| We're going to the fucking club. | |
| Don't ask me about my life, pussy. | |
| Worry about yours. | |
| I don't know what I'm doing. | |
| You don't want anything to sound out? | |
| How? No? | |
| I have my rights. | |
| I have my rights. I have my rights. | |
| Expect one of us in the wreckage. | |
| No! They expect one of us in the wreckage, brother. | |
| ah Have we started the fire? | |
| Yes. The fire rises. | |
| So, they've run out of Verve Clicquot champagne. | |
| Andrew, Andrew. They've run out of Verve Clicquot. | |
| I'm switching to Moe. | |
| The Verve Clicquot are out there. | |
| They're out. We've drunk them out of champagne. | |
| And we've just begun. | |
| Ha, ha, ha! Woo! | |
| How's no drinking going for you, loser? | |
| Oh my gosh. | |
| Go! | |
| Once second Yes, yes More people go | |
| Guys, we want to open it Open all of your pockets I said I could tell him 100% I'll do it I'll do it right now, immediately Let's do it! | |
| I'm going to die! | |
| Hurry up! | |
| I'm sorry, I'm sorry. | |
| Hey, did you see how big my hand is? | |
| Hey! | |
| Hey! | |
| I'm sorry, I'm sorry. | |
| Listen! | |
| Come on, come on. | |
| You're only making this video to lift me with us. | |
| I know. | |
| I know. | |
| Mr. Bagman. | |
| How's your non-hangover? | |
| It's good. It's good, yeah? | |
| Yeah, it's sunshiny. You know who also isn't hungover? | |
| Me and Andy. I was up all night having sex after drinking booze. | |
| And I'm not hungover. Are you hungover? | |
| Hungover? So all three of us aren't hungover? | |
| Baby you. What are you? Baby you. Luke's probably more tired and hungover than me and you. | |
| And he didn't drink any booze. | |
| Alright, so we're going to drive to Poznan, yeah? | |
| Yeah. So, wait, how long do we have? | |
| Two or three hours to drive, so we need a coffee or a Red Bull, some energy. | |
| Moscow Mule? Driving Mule. | |
| Driving Mule. Moscow Mule. | |
| Let's go, let's hit it. Moscow Mule. | |
| You're not allowed. I have to drive two hours to Cosman, so I need something to wake me up. | |
| Can I have two Moscow mules, please? | |
| Of course! Two Moscow mules, four double espressos, and a cappuccino. | |
| No, no, I'm driving. | |
| Of course, the Moscow mules for driving power. | |
| Give him focus. You need focus, strength. | |
| Driving booze? Yeah, driving booze. | |
| Don't worry, I've got the driving booze, it's fine. | |
| He's got the driving booze. Booze is on his way. | |
| Driving booze is coming. Don't worry. | |
| Situation's handled. We're driving. | |
| Luke's not driving. Me and you are driving, eh? | |
| Yeah. Nothing like a Moscow Mule in the morning when we wake you up. | |
| Well, Luke has no hangover, but then we have no hangover, and we've got loads and loads and loads of boobs. | |
| Yeah. Why is that? | |
| I don't know. So, Luke, you're not hungover, you know? | |
| I'm not hungover. Luke's definitely more sleepy and tired than me and you. | |
| Refreshing. Nerd. | |
| Loser. It does kind of sound good, but I know it's hoisted. | |
| Ginger vodka refreshing. | |
| Perfectly ready for this one. I'll get you ready. | |
| Take a 800 horsepower supercar, three hours in the Polish countryside. | |
| Luke, I think I'm done with the sofa. | |
| One what? I think I'm done with the hall. | |
| I think I'm done with the kitchen table, fate. | |
| What does this mean? Where's your fucking space suit? | |