| Time | Text |
|---|---|
|
Fucking Cider On The Boat
00:10:49
|
|
| Good shot there from Tate! | |
| A lot of people say girls love money and that's not entirely true. | |
| I'm not sure if that's true. | |
| No! No! Text him. | |
| Message him. He must be. | |
| Hopefully. Come! | |
| Here! Here! Here! | |
| He's here! He's here! He's here! | |
| Wrong train, bro! | |
| Jesus! What are you doing? | |
| Cool. Bro, there were two trains you got on the wrong one. | |
| I gave you instructions. | |
| Now, all these small cameras at the same time, you can buy tickets from the guy in the car. | |
| Just get on the table. | |
| I got his bag. | |
| What's the emergency? | |
| The crew is emergency. | |
| We left the chicken shit bullshit. | |
| Don't. Oh, you take your mask off, pussy. | |
| We're not in fucking Western Europe anymore. | |
| The Czech guy came and he said, oh, we don't have masks. | |
| He goes, in Czech Republic, no masks. | |
| They're not homos here. They also reopened the food cart. | |
| We can get beers. Only the Germans are like, oh, we're scared. | |
| We're scared of the virus. | |
| So it's concluded. The Germans are pussies. | |
| Pussies! It's concluded. The Czechs reopened the food cart, said take your masks off, and gave us our fucking beers. | |
| This was an actual emergency meeting. | |
| It was an emergency meeting. This was very good. This was an emergency. | |
| I did not know. Finish your beer. | |
| Why are we here? | |
| Boozing! No, but we keep fucking beer. | |
| I take it back. | |
| I take it back. Czech is horrible. | |
| Germans trying to oppress us. | |
| You don't want to be here. They're trying to oppress us and stop us living our lives. | |
| This is your own personal hell. | |
| Yeah. We're going to meet my friends later. | |
| My fucking fantastic friends. | |
| Nobody likes you. Nobody likes you. | |
| Wait. You can't have friends. | |
| Nobody likes you. I have friends in the Czech Republic who will destroy you. | |
| This is not Obama. | |
| This is not San Diego. | |
| This is not San Francisco. | |
| This is the Czech Republic. | |
| And you're going to fucking drink like you're in the Czech Republic. | |
| I mean, you can't drink like you're in fucking San Francisco. | |
| Ooh, I had half a Budweiser last week, bro. | |
| I'm so drunk. Hey, man, I played six rounds of beer pong with my buddy. | |
| I had to have two sips. Oh, man, I got a pounding headache. | |
| Anyone got any Adderall? | |
| So, they ran out of beer, but they do have cider. | |
| You know what? I bet Luke loves a fucking cider, doesn't he? | |
| You know, mister, I don't really like alcoholic drinks. | |
| I bet he fucking loves it. It's the same alcohol as beer, isn't it? | |
| Yeah, same alcohol, but smaller can. | |
| Smaller can is perfect, I agree. | |
| I agree. He loves this drink. | |
| He's going to love this cider. | |
| I'm going to remind myself, I haven't had a cider in a fucking year. | |
| Remind myself about cider and I'm going to guarantee you that Luke loves it. | |
| He's gonna fucking love cider. Do I like- He's gonna fucking love cider. | |
| It's like juice. Finish your can, you cunt. | |
| Finish your can, you cunt. Finish your can, you cunt. | |
| Finish your can, you cunt. So I finish the piss, and then I get- Piss? | |
| Piss is Budvar. | |
| If a Czech guy was here, he'd punch you in the face. | |
| I don't know what this is. That's- Budweiser stole their name from Budvar, which was a Czech beer that's like 100 years older than Budweiser. | |
| And Budweiser also tastes like piss. | |
| And then they sued Budweiser, and Budweiser had to pay him. | |
| But Budweiser also tastes like piss. | |
| Yeah, but you're an American. Finish it and drink your cider. | |
| Finish your beer! Ah, this is horrible. | |
| Drink more. We don't care. | |
| They don't care, do they? | |
| We don't care. This is horrible. | |
| I'm telling you guys, don't drink this beer. | |
| Sorry. Sorry, Czech people. | |
| It's good feeling. Who wants a straightener? | |
| The bubbles. Oh, scare the bubbles. | |
| Typical Luke. The bubbles hit me. | |
| Typical Luke. The bubbles. | |
| Drink it up. Beer's horrible. Drink it up. | |
| I don't like beer. I'd rather do vodka. | |
| Suck back the bubbles. Alright, down to zero. | |
| When I verify the can's empty, you get your cider. | |
| I know. Ah, it's not empty yet. | |
| The bubbles. I'll tell you what, he'd like more than cider. | |
| Nothing at all. Water. | |
| Nah, I think he'll love his cider. Nah, he will. | |
| He'll love his cider. Finish your fucking- He's never had a fucking apple cider, has he? | |
| Little fucking- I don't think so. | |
| Little baby Luke. | |
| Ah, done. Ah. | |
| All right. You'll love that. | |
| Let's go of Cider Man after this. | |
| Cider. You know what? Can a man drink a cider? | |
| In England, men drink cider. | |
| You can drink a pint of cider. He's tasting it. | |
| In pints only. Ah, that is fucking good. | |
| That is fucking good. | |
| No, actually, actually, people, actually, compared to that piss bullshit. | |
| Take a sip of this as well. Let me try this one. | |
| What you need is some White Ace. | |
| All right, this is good. White Lightning. | |
| I don't know who makes this. Somersby. | |
| Somersby is a good company. | |
| Blue English. Take a sip of this. They're English. | |
| I highly recommend them. | |
| Take a sip. You'll love this as well. All ciders is the same strength as beer. | |
| In fact, they're stronger than beer. They're from Somerset. | |
| Drink it. This one's okay. | |
| That one's much, much better. | |
| The apple one's much, much, much better. | |
| This one's very good. This might be my favorite drink of all time. | |
| I can hear you everywhere. | |
| The thing is you snore, Rory. | |
| I didn't even notice until I heard... | |
| You know what? Another 4 or 5 seconds of the right hook, straight to the solar plexus. | |
| Everyone was ready, the camera was out. | |
| Yeah. I was arming up the arm, getting in the right position. | |
| I was trying to move out the way. Yeah. | |
| Getting in the right position for it. | |
| Thank you, brother. Thank you, bro. | |
| Hello, bro. Hello, Ron. | |
| How are you? Good. | |
| All right, first thing, can I tell you... | |
| Hey, you know, like that. I love you. Yeah. Okay. | |
| Yeah. | |
| Cars. | |
| So I'm obviously enjoying my Ferrari. | |
| So I'm filming from inside my Ferrari. | |
| This is gangster. | |
| It's great. | |
| It's great. | |
| I don't want you. | |
| How's your stomach? Feeling better? | |
| I mean, it does, but also... | |
| I have no idea why that happened. | |
| Maybe it was the Red Bull. It's got something to sort you out. | |
| Do you like Cubans? | |
| Oh, I don't like doing this. | |
| I don't want to do that. | |
| Mobile vodka. Nice! | |
| Professional. I like that. | |
| Tasteful of Mobile Vodka and Cubans. | |
| Your move, staggot. | |
| Body on the move. Why? | |
| You gotta have your body on the move, mobile. | |
| Making you a little bit of brekkie. Yeah. | |
| You need to have body packed and ready at all times. | |
| Oh, you don't want brekkie. Do you have any body in your bag? | |
| No. What kind of man doesn't have body in his bag? | |
| You're a fucking coward. | |
| You're the worst of men. | |
| Nobody like us, nobody like us. | |
| We don't care. We don't care. | |
| We don't care. Oh, sorry for packing mobile body. | |
| This is not the one that tastes like pills. | |
| I know, I know. I know, I know it's not. | |
| This is pure, deathly poison. | |
| That one we had in Slovakia was nice. | |
| It was good. And I like it. | |
| But I remember this glass. We are in the Czech Republic. | |
| You see this glass shape? Yes. | |
| The shape of this glass. Yes. | |
| And the color of this liquid. Cheers to you too. | |
| No, I know exactly what this is. | |
| Look. For those at home, this is pure poison. | |
| Death. It's death in a bottle. | |
| It's probably worse than Polinka. | |
| It probably is. It's a pure, absolute death. | |
| I remember what it tastes like. It's like pine. | |
| It's pine, isn't it? Yes. | |
| Yeah, so I do. So I've had this before. | |
| He thinks I haven't had this before. I've had it before. | |
| Luke, you are in the Czech Republic. | |
| With me. I've done driving for five days. | |
| I remember now. Oh, I want to have a nice little relaxing drink with my cousin. | |
| And suddenly, what? You're too good to drink a bit. | |
| Tristan, think about it. You're too cool to drink with me. | |
| Guys, listen. The series is cancelled. | |
| Luke's too cool to hang out with me and drink with me. | |
| I've had this once in my life. | |
| I've had this once. Once in my life. | |
| And you're so cool that that's enough. | |
| No, but we agree I've had this once in my life. | |
| It's too cool to drink with you guys. Yet I somehow remember that this is pine. | |
| And it tastes like pine. | |
| No, it tastes like pure death. | |
| Imagine how much drinks I've had. | |
| Different varieties. Somehow I remember that. | |
| This is pine. It tastes like death. | |
| It is death. Yeah. Okay. | |
| Cheers! | |
| It's pure love. | |
| Helmet. | |
| Yes, yes, yes. | |
| Fuck it, eat this shit. | |
| Look, do you know what the magic eye is? | |
| I do not. Whoop! | |
| Magic eye. Na zdrave. | |
| Na zdrave, ciao. | |
| Ciao, ciao. Brat ce vidimne. | |
| Na zdrave, ciao. | |
| Na zdrave, ciao. Na zdrave, ciao. Na zdrave. Luke, what's your magic eye? | |
| Shit. Magic eye. | |
| It is magic. Magic eye. | |
| Okay, done? Done. | |
| Good. It's alright. | |
| It's not awful. Not awful at all. | |
|
Boat Dinner Boozes
00:00:21
|
|
| Why are we here? On a boat. | |
| Why are we on a boat? It's in all forms of transport. | |
| Supercars, trains, boats. | |
| We're on a boat. Planes? Yeah. | |
| We're on a boat. We're gonna have dinner on a boat. | |
| They gave us booze as we entered. | |
| It's for Europe. As soon as you walk on the boat, you have to. | |
| There's booze everywhere. I know. | |