Theo talks about his vacation, fishing, and other stuff.
New Merch
https://theovonstore.com
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This episode is brought to you by…
Manscaped
Get 20% Off + Free Shipping, with the code THEO at https://Manscaped.com/theo
Blue Chew
Visit https://BlueChew.com and get your first shipment FREE when use promo code [THEO]-- Just pay $5 shipping
Bridge Credit Solutions
https://bridgecreditsolutions.com/theo
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Music
“Time is No Stranger” - Stevie Starlight
Support Stevie Starlight and purchase his new EP “Unnaturally Happy” off of Apple Music:
https://bit.ly/UnnaturallyHappy_StevieStarlight
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hit the Hotline
985-664-9503
Video Hotline for Theo
Upload here: http://bit.ly/TPW_VideoHotline
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Find Theo
Website: https://theovon.com
Instagram: https://instagram.com/theovon
Facebook: https://facebook.com/theovon
Facebook Group: https://facebook.com/groups/thispastweekend
Twitter: https://twitter.com/theovon
YouTube: https://youtube.com/theovon
Clips Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCiEKV_MOhwZ7OEcgFyLKilw
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Producer Nick
https://instagram.com/realnickdavis
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
I'm jumped up man I got a frog in my bulg right now.
I've been having me a little bit of coffee that um what kind do I have Folgers pecan praline flavor and damn boy That shit got some whoo that it's got at least some 84 octane in it that thing oh give me heart gas bro you ever get that I used to get that when I used to work out on a farm out there off of um near the
levee over there in Mississippi and I used to work on a farm over there with a tall man and a and a fat fella kind of smaller and um one of them died actually one of them got on pills and died but uh or not he didn't die but he he did die he did die but um oh shit what was I talking about oh I don't even know I do not even know but
um but I'm back and I hope you're back and apparently you are here we go lovers laughing in the springtime the other day on my way to see you crowds of people trying to stay with nothing left to see oh
try to phase out better let me try to phase out again and we are happy to have that music right there and that is music by a talented man a man of talent named Stevie Starlight and you know some of his music
has been with us since the beginning since the beginning and that is off of his new album unnaturally happy and there will be a link in the bio you can go and support him and um and thank you stevie for those new tunes thank you for that good to be back i'm at home again i'm at home again i like being at home you know i i um i
just moved the podcast the episode back here into my apartment i just you know i don't know i just feel better i feel i the bells and whistles sometimes you know it's almost like say you go to a christmas party or if somebody has a party at christmas and you go to that you know what i'm saying say you walk into somebody's house and people are drinking eggnog and it's december you know i don't know how else i can explain
it to you but um and your wife or somebody a man if you a gay man you got a buddy or something you say oh this is my friend carl or whatever this my friend tyson but you always just pretend it's your friend from the gym but it's you know it's gonna probably be your husband if you guys live in a state that allows it and you go in there and you're wearing something that just it doesn't you know you might be wearing a christmas sweater but
it's got the the lights strewn into it and you got to carry a little can of um you know electricity electricity little generator generator and you got to plug it into that and hold that bitch all night and you know and every you know every 30 minutes your sweater lights up and sings you know this is just my friend carl
you know that kind of shit you know what i'm saying is that you might not feel comfortable in it you know in the beginning you'll like it you'll like the the fashion you'll like the the the attraction people will come and look at it and they'll watch it play the song one time or something and maybe it'll give you a little you know a hug or a pat on the back or something and be like oh what what gym do
you guys work at knowing that you guys live together there you know everybody's playing along you know then and obviously you guys are you know lovers probably may men lovers they call it some places or whatever it doesn't matter it could be your wife if you if you have a wife it could also be your wife or whatever what i'm saying is sometimes you're wearing something that you know it just it feels fun but it's not you know you just don't feel comfortable in it and
um so anyway that's just how i've been feeling at the with the studio and so i'm just happy to be uh in my apartment there's there's less expectations that maybe i don't know what there are i don't know and it doesn't matter maybe i just feel good about it um what's going on oh i just got back from new hampshire live
free or die that's their motto up there and it's nice and you get up there and you really can feel you know you just they got uh well i'll tell you what happened i flew into maine i flew into maine you know and um and Maine.
I don't know if you've been to Maine.
I don't know if you've been to, I flew into Portland, Maine.
And if you've been to any city or town up in this area, in that high New England, in that far reach of, you know, this is the damn, this is the seventh appendage, bro, when you get up there, way up off of Maine and New Hampshire.
Some of that area, you just, you don't know what's going on, really.
You know, there's still pilgrims parking their boats.
There's, you know, you'll see a cannonball go through the air.
They got some old school shit.
But they also, the zoning, apparently, here's the thing, three things that are allowed up in that area.
Dunkin' Donnets, Urgent Care, and Cemetery.
Those three things.
Every other area or building, which is like a squaria, basically, is one of those three things.
Dude, you go to urgent care, what happened?
Oh, he broke his arm.
Oh, give him an apple fritter.
Oh, a shark bit off his shoulder.
Oh, tape a kreller.
Just, you know, rubber some in a kreller up into there, into the socket.
He'll be fine.
Doesn't matter.
You go get a blood transfusion, they'll fucking pump you full of, you know, eight ounces of hot Bavarian cream.
Just fill you up.
You know, you get part of your spine taken out.
It doesn't matter.
They'll put two donut holes in there.
And now you got a little sugar in your step.
You know, now you're meeting men on accident.
It's just that kind of thing it's just, those are the only, if you have been in this area, those are the only businesses.
Are you hurt?
If so, you might need a Dunkin' Donnet, boy.
And if not, you might be dead.
Those are the options.
Urgent care.
Dunkin' Donnet Cemetery.
Or cemetario, bro.
That Mexican death spot.
You got it.
So that's it up there.
Oh, a bald eagle fucking, you know, bitch your neck open?
Don't even worry about it, bruh.
We'll freaking duct tape an E-clair to your cousin.
You're going to be fine.
It don't matter.
I mean, they'll have a dead dude.
They'll have somebody climb out the grave and they give him a fucking donnet.
Hit him with two dunking donnets, bro.
He goes back to, you know, the other side.
It's just that kind of area there.
It's just so damn dunking and it's just so damn urgent.
And it's just so damn deadly.
But that's the kind of place it is.
Live free or die.
You know, eat donuts, get urgently cared for, and then go to heaven.
That's what they're doing up there.
So I flew in and, oh, and I went to see my buddy.
And he is, you know, this is a friend of mine.
And we used to live together.
I used to actually sleep under his bed when I first moved to Los Angeles.
When I first came out here to this city, I slept under my fellow, my buddy Kevin's bed.
I slept under there for $150.
And his roommate worked at TSA Security Airport.
And he had just gotten out of the Marines or double Marines or something.
Or just, I don't know, he might have just gotten out of the damn angry assholes club, but he made me, one time I came home, or I don't know if you would call it home when you're sleeping under somebody's bed for $150, but, you know, I came back to the area that I would sleep under somebody's bed in.
And the roommate had my prescription pills out at the table.
You know, because I was on a couple things at the time, you know, something for the brain, something for the pain.
You feel me?
I was on a couple of, you know, nothing crazy, just some antidepressants and maybe some couple of Percocets or some Zannis, something.
You know, a little bit of stool softener and a little bit of stool hardener.
And he sits me down at the table and he had a damn pistol there.
And he's like, are these your pills?
Like, he was just practicing.
He just got a job working at the, you know, it's doing, I don't know.
I don't know what he was doing.
But he had a weapon and he sat me down.
He's like, I could go to jail.
These are schedule one narcotics, boy.
I don't know what the hell.
Like, what?
But anyway, so my friend Kevin, that's whose bed I slept under.
Oh, and I'll tell you this.
They had a guy who lived with us years later, and he was a, this guy was, you know, he was black and white.
Swirl, they used to call it swirl.
And he was swirl, you know, swirl, but, you know, a swirl boy.
And he could jump over a Volkswagen.
And he was also, he was on the Olympic junior ski team.
Or not ski, but jumping.
What's that sport where they jump across the thing?
They just jump.
They spin and they play a song and they jump and they jump around and everybody tries to pretend they're straight and it's all in the end.
It's a lot of closeted men, but beautiful.
But the whole thing is damn beautiful.
It looks French kind of, but it's on ice.
You know what I'm talking about.
Anyway, I'm rambling, but damn, this coffee's got me.
What am I talking about?
Oh, so anyway, my buddy Kevin now was up in New Hampshire.
I went to visit him.
He's up there with his girlfriend, And she thought he was going to surprise her with marriage proposal.
So she's expecting that surprise.
And instead, the surprise was me that I was coming to visit.
So it was not, they were not enthralled.
She was not enthralled about that.
When you expecting that diamond ring, but you get the rat king, baby.
So needless to say, it was awkward.
But it was fun, man.
And it was just nice up there.
You know, they have lakes up there.
They have a lake.
You know, they have Crystal Lake, Purity Lake, the area we were in.
And beautiful, just the kind of water you just, God, it feels like it has just like amniotic fluid in it.
Like if you masturbate it into the water, you know, nine months later, your son would just wash up on the shore.
And he'd, you know, and you'd run him to urgent care and put a couple Dunkin' Donnets in his bottle.
Just that kind of place, you know.
What else?
But yeah, went fishing.
Oh, that was the fun thing.
So we went fishing.
And they got the, well, I caught my first bass.
You know, and I went fishing for the first time at 5 a.m.
in the morning.
And this was crazy, man.
We got out there and got out there in these rowboats and, you know, had some worms, had some lures or luris and went at them.
And it was, it was, I guess, you know, I wish I knew more about fishing and I'm trying to learn more about it.
You know, I grew up, we would just put the, it was just worm.
You catch a worm or you put a little dog food or something on there.
Or a little cat food or something.
Or one time my buddy killed a swan and we caught a bunch of bullheads on a dam, you know, on that swan sashimi meat.
You know, fresh swan.
But we got out there in the rowboats and we fished and there was just a bunch of little, just aggravating ass fish, dude, a bunch of damn water antifa just biting at my line, just nibbling at my giblets.
You feel me?
Just thieves, really.
Looters.
They'd come up, steal your worm, bite that bitch up, and jet off, go do something else they wanted to do, you know, go hit the next guy.
But finally, one spot I was on this one bank, and I was putting everything back in.
Anything I caught, little pikes, piccarels, what else?
Little bluegills.
And then one time I put that bait in, and it was worm.
It's just groundworm, American groundworm, you know?
The freaking Ray Charles of the Earth, brothers, them, you know, them blind bad boys.
You know, that baby snake.
You know what I'm talking about, that worm, man.
You know what I'm saying?
I mean, a worm.
You know, imagine being a worm.
Just day after day, just moving through dirt.
And none of it, it's all just a grind.
And maybe, I guess you fuck other worms.
I don't even know if they do sex.
I mean, I've never seen them.
I've never seen them doing sex worms.
But I mean, I guess if you put a couple of them in a little cage and read them a romance novel or something, or put them in a little, you know, a bowl or something, maybe put a little bit of foil over it.
You know, put a little sprig of jasmine in there and read them bitches that put a romance novel on the audible or whatever.
You might hear, you know.
But anyway, so I put that worm on there the second it hit the water.
And I've been out there for about two and a half hours, three hours maybe already.
The second it hit the water on this one time, I was about maybe three feet off the bank, four feet off the bank, and I'm in a little rowboat, hit the water, whoosh.
And man, that's you can feel immediately it's a different feeling.
And I have a tough time knowing when, like, because I'll feel the nibble, you know, I'll feel the, when the little ones pull on it, I'll feel like the little nibble.
And it's hard for me to know when to set that hook, when to really just pull that rod, you know, yank that post.
It's just hard for me to know.
And so, but this time I got it right.
Everything aligned.
And I just, you know, be honest, I hooked that bitch.
And they call that hooking that bitch, baby.
PTL, baby.
Praise the Lord, man.
And so it was good, bro.
I got one.
And, man, I just, I was excited.
Because you're talking, I had just come from Louisiana.
I didn't catch anything down there.
You know, almost caught damn Corvid from freaking Brendan Sherlock over there.
Or Brendan Unsherlock.
UnSherlock Holmes, that guy.
Dude, he couldn't.
You know, he couldn't.
Whatever.
So, but I got tested.
I got tested for COVID.
I came back negative.
But I've never caught shit.
I've never been that guy.
I'm not that guy.
You know, I'm that multi.
I'm multi.
You know, inside of me, I got that multifaceted.
You know, I got that Polish Nicaraguan DNA.
I got it in me.
And so we don't catch that bullshit.
I ain't out here.
I don't catch a lot of colds.
I don't catch a lot of, you know.
You know, I might come down with a little bit of pink eye from being naughty, but I ain't, you know, I'm not that, I'm not that guy.
I don't catch a lot of that shit.
I don't have a lot of eczema.
I don't have a lot of freaking, you know, natural scarring on my back or anything from God or anything.
I don't have any of that shit.
You know, knock on wood.
But anyway, so I caught a bass and I just enjoyed myself up there.
And I just enjoyed myself and I was just a third wheel.
You know, I was that third wheel.
But we had a good time, man.
And they were really my friends.
It was just nice.
It was nice to be welcomed somewhere and be treated just kindly.
My buddy's girlfriend is awesome and it was good for me and him to catch up and remember stuff and just remember who still owes the other one money, basically.
What else?
What else are we getting into, man?
I'm going to tell you straight up that this episode is brought to you by Blue Chew.
And I don't know if you guys remember, you know, if you guys remember the days when you were ready to go.
When you were ready to just throw that body lightning and just work that dick, bro.
You feel me?
Sorry to be like that, but, you know, I've been watching some of these TikToks from some of these BLM rallies, dude.
And I'm, you know, when you're ready to throw that dick, you remember those days, right?
Well, now you can increase your performance and get that extra confidence in bed.
That's right.
You can increase your performance and get that extra confidence in bed.
Bluechew.com, that's blue, like the color blue.
Blue Chew brings you the first chewable with the same FDA-approved active ingredients as Viagra and sialis.
And you could take them anytime.
You know, you don't have to take them at a certain time.
You can take them anytime.
It could be sunrise, surprise your friend.
You know, surprise your lady, surprise your husband.
If you're gay and your husband is also probably gay.
Then surprise them.
Get that boot, get that body.
Get that Rocky Rocky in that front hitter, bruh.
Get that knock post going, you feel me?
Rock up that wing, baby.
You feel me?
Make your deep, make your deep tight.
You can take them anytime, day or night, even on a full stomach.
You know, this ain't swimming.
A lot of times you can't swim on a full stomach.
You got to wait 30 minutes, not with Blue Chew.
Get that bitch in your system.
It's the fast, easy way to enhance your sexual performance.
Blue Chew is prescribed online by licensed physicians.
So you don't have to go to the doctor's office and wait in line at the pharmacy.
It ships right to your door in discrete packaging.
You know, they'll ship it in a unique way.
They might put it in a guitar case or something.
People, oh, he's doing music.
But all you're doing is freaking loading up, you know, front loading that body flute.
They're made in the USA.
Hell yeah.
Fuck China.
And since Blue Chew prepares and ships direct, they're cheaper than a pharmacy.
And best of all, there's no more awkwardness.
Nope.
Right now we've got a special deal for our listeners.
Visit Blue Chew, B-L-U-E-C-H-E-W.com and get your first shipment free when you use our special promo code, Theo, T-H-E-O.
Just pay $5 shipping.
Again, that's B-L-U-E-C-H-E-W.com.
Promo code Theo to try it for free.
It's the better, cheaper, faster choice, and we thank you for supporting the podcast.
And if you haven't tried it, go support the podcast.
Give it a try.
You know, I like them.
I like them at first.
I was skeptical, and then, whoo, I was not skeptical, dog.
You feel me?
This thing, a cat could bat this thing around for an hour.
You'll be heightened up.
And you got that body height, bro.
That cock.
All right.
All right.
Man, I feel amped up today.
That's okay.
You know, sometimes I get on the podcast and I want to kind of feel a certain way or be in a certain mindset.
And it's just, it's, you know, you know, I always want to like plan for life.
I want to be okay.
I want it to be this way.
Man, it's so impossible.
It just comes.
It's just a conveyor belt.
And nobody will turn it off.
It keeps coming.
So I got to just learn to enjoy what is on the belt.
What else did I do?
I'm looking through my phone.
We grilled that bass up.
And people sent me messages, instant messages.
And they said, don't do it, boy.
Don't eat it.
Well, I ate it.
And I liked it.
I like that bass meat.
And I'll eat it again.
I'll eat that bastard.
I'll tell you this.
The bass had a crawfish inside it.
A full-body crawfish in there.
Living its life and doing its thing.
So I guess they were like just Lilo and Stitch, these little MFers, bruh.
Because we cut right into it and a crawdad rolled right out that bastard.
And we put him back.
So damn.
So that's that rebirth right there.
Shout out Rebirth Brass Band, too.
But I've been off of coffee for a while and now I'm trying it again.
But I think I'm going to get off of it again.
But yeah, we cut this thing up.
I watched some YouTube tutorials.
Caught a piccorrell over there in Eaton, E-A-T-O-N, New Hampshire, and Conway, I think is the area we were in.
And they had two bulldogs over there.
My buddy's girlfriend had two bulldogs, and one of them has had $70,000 worth of physical, you know, or, I don't know, you know, different things they had to do fix it.
The thing need a new spine, need a new, you know, the dog can't, you know, it needs a little elevator put in its hip because it can't piss anymore.
So I have to do, you know, you press a button at the house and it, you know, its back leg goes up and it can relieve itself.
Fuck all of that.
Man, dude, I'm from the, where I'm from, when God wants his dog back, God gets his dog back.
You got people spending 20,000 over here.
Get a dog a facial reconstructive.
Next thing you know, you got a, you know, you got a dog that looks like damn, you know, you got a dog that looks like Rachel Maddow or something.
And that cost you 18 grand.
And you could have gone another, you know, if you'd have gone 28 grand, you get your little whim oron or look like Danny Glover or look like, you know, who else is somebody famous?
And...
Yeah.
Hmm.
Hmm.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Andre Agassiz.
So it's just, but yeah, anyway, just blew my mind the money that people will spend on the animals.
I respect it.
I'm not saying that some of them aren't worth it.
But I'm just saying at a certain financial when God, at a certain point, you paying to keep the dog from the Lord.
You know, after you done spent $30,000 on that pup, you know, you got his, they restationed his tail and they, you know, they put in two feet of pig intestine in him.
And, you know, it just, and they had a length in him.
They took part of a wiener dog that had died in a motorcycle accident.
They put it in the middle of your dog and you're just, you got that little, you run it, you know, you got a little Frankenstein.
This dude's shitting out of his eyelids every night and stuff before bed.
And you just, at a certain point, it's time to give the dog back to God.
And that's where I'm from.
You know, that's where I'm from, man.
You know, when I was young, we used to bet on, they used to bet on how many babies a dog would have.
You know, you'd see a dog out there whelping and you'd have somebody throw, you know, I give, put $4 on six.
They got six in her.
You know, $1.50.
Let me get, who wants $1.50?
I'll do, you know, what's the over-under?
It's three.
You know, and you could do a little parlay or something.
Okay, I hope, you know, I want five.
I want to go five or over.
And, you know, 60% of them is going to be females or something.
You can do something like that.
What else?
Oh, lost money.
I bet the UFC.
I should have stuck with Nick, my producer, Nick.
He has the best picks.
I decided to go out on my own and I lost some money.
I didn't lose a lot, but actually, I did lose a lot.
I lost $400.
And so I'm not happy about that.
You know, it made it fun, though.
It was something fun to do.
I'm glad the UFC happens.
I really am enjoying it more.
And Usman.
Usman is boring.
Dude, Usman is a boring fighter.
He's probably the most boring black guy I've even seen do a sport.
He might as well be white.
He might as well be white out there.
Because the dude is just...
I respect it.
You know, I respect there being like, you know, that, who's that guy that would, you know, the boring, who would do something great but do it boringly.
Who am I thinking of?
Do something great but do it boringly.
I can't think of anybody.
I can, but I don't know who they are.
Man, I'm just rambling.
But that's what I'm doing today.
I'm rambling.
What else?
I watched the fights, lost some money.
Didn't catch COVID.
Oh, I got to see my mom when I was at home.
I got to see my nieces and nephews.
I went fishing in Louisiana.
Bitch, I'm from Louisiana.
And what else, man?
I don't know.
I just, you know, it was just, I don't know.
I don't know.
It's just, it's okay.
I'm alive.
The conveyor belt is just going to keep serving up life.
And that's what it is.
You know, I just have to be grateful that the belt's still going.
So we got a couple calls that came in.
As always, the hotline is 985-664-9503.
Here we go.
Hey, what's up, Theo?
This is y'all, y'all, from the Booth and Pod.
I had an interesting question.
What's up, y'all, y'all?
Gang, bro.
Onward.
Interesting question.
What is it?
I'm about to turn 30, and I have two months of vacation for the first time in my adult life.
I'm a middle school teacher now, and I don't know what to do with myself.
Oh, you middle school teacher, huh?
Well, anybody could teach that, dude.
That's not that hard.
Honestly, man, no offense, y'all, but middle school, that's shit.
I mean, that's basically what, after dinosaurs, spelling.
That's spelling heavy.
Rivers, you're learning a lot of rivers and stuff there.
You know, Brendan, you wouldn't want him in there.
Or you'd have to do him twice.
You know, Brendan probably did all freaking all five grades of middle school.
But yeah, man, no disrespect, but middle school's easy, bro.
Gang, bro, onward.
Especially during the Corvid times.
I just spent a week fishing in Denver, but I was wondering, you know, since you've had some time to yourself lately, what would you do if you had two months off of work?
No strings attached.
All right.
Love you.
Gang, gang, brother.
Gang, man.
Love you too.
And sorry, whatever I said earlier about your job being easy.
I don't think your job is easy.
I'm just saying challenge yourself more.
Teach them something wild.
You know?
Teach a kid how to, you know, shoot a cannon or, you know, debowel a boar or something.
You know, teach a kid how to, you know, you know, what pills are safe to take or whatever, depending on what time of day it is.
You know what I'm saying?
Just don't be afraid to, you know, to kind of loosen up the curriculum.
Because when shit gets hot, shit gets hot.
Would you ask, man?
Oh, what would you do?
Well, I just realized recently I'd go back.
If I could go back in time, even over the past few months, I would take more little trips and excursions.
I would spend more time outside.
You know, nature is wide open right now, and it's really, I feel like it's a little more well-rested than ever.
You know, we went on a hike the other day up there in New Hampshire in the hamp, and they had fresh blueberries growing out of the ground.
You know, because God likes to snack.
You know?
And it was just cool.
They had fresh raspberries, you know.
And so I was just seeing, wow, nature's nature's hype.
So that's what I would do.
Nature's still open.
You know, some of the national parks and stuff are closed, and you got to be a little creative.
But in a lot of ways, it's a great time to get out and be a part of nature.
It sounded like you were doing that with the fishing.
So I think you're on track, man.
I think you're right on track, dude.
But yeah, I would just get a little more challenging with the kid.
Maybe have him do stunts or something.
Put a bike ramp or something in the back of the class.
Because shit might get hot.
You know, teach them how to set a tripwire or set a snare.
You know, I'd love to see a middle school class that, you know, that teaches, you know, say if what if something happens?
You guys are on a field trip.
You guys are going to, you know, the museum.
If there even are museums in a, you know, another couple months, everything in the museum will be outlawed or racist.
And so it'll be, you know, they'll shut them down.
But before that, you want to get in there.
What if the bus crashes?
And now little Davey or whatever, they got to, you know, they got to, they got to survive.
They might have to eat their buddy.
They might have to, you know, teach them how to do that.
Or something.
You know what I'm saying?
You know what I'm saying?
Just be creative.
Have you seen that movie, School Ties with the teacher, Robin Williams?
Teaches the kids how to just, you know, think for themselves, man.
That's what it's all about, bro.
Gang shit.
What else we got here?
Let's take a call, man.
Man, I don't like this caffeine.
It's got me feeling fast.
Onward, let's go.
Hey, what's up, Theo?
This is JJ from Denver, Colorado.
What's up, JJ from Denver?
Appreciate you calling, man.
You know, I love Denver.
A lot of beautiful people over there.
Met a beautiful woman over there by the Whole Foods there.
And got her number, and she never messaged me back, but that's my life, baby.
You feel me?
I still got that number.
I think it was her number.
It could have been a fake number, but at least I got a fake number, son.
Gang, baby.
Onward.
Just sitting here listening to this past weekend, working from home, getting ready for a backpacking trip to kind of get away and clear my mind from all this crazy shit going on.
Good for you, brother.
Good for you, man.
That's beautiful.
Onward.
I was just kind of curious what your opinion is on how people can affect change.
I know at least in Denver, they're having a lot of mostly peaceful protests, which seems like it's working pretty good.
We have a police reform coming up soon.
And I'm just curious if you think that voting is the only way to affect change or kind of what you think would be the best way to go about that.
Because it seems like a lot of people are hurting and they're trying to get things changed, but no one's really listening to them.
Gang, bro, thank you for the call.
You know what's interesting, man?
You know, I find that the biggest effector of changes really is time.
And, you know, you can't just depend on time.
You know, you have to remind time of what you want.
And I think you see a lot of that recently with, you know, a lot of the protests, a lot of, you know, you see a lot of it.
You know, just to, you know, remind for people to share what they feel and get out there and share what their feelings are.
So, yeah, I think that that kind of stuff is good.
I think voting for people that support the things you want.
But...
But it's hard.
I think the biggest things that we can do, because look, I want to get the place not to do it is arguing online.
It just, it doesn't, you can't win.
You know, I got in a, you know, I usually do a good job of not doing it.
And then the other day I commented on something on my social media.
And it just, you know, sometimes you just, you know, you want to, it's weird because sometimes you feel online and in social media, you feel, you know, people behave ways online that they are not really behaving in real life, which is interesting.
And I might be going off topic.
I don't even know exactly what I'm talking about, but I find it the same, and I'll do the same.
It's like, would I really go off on somebody or, you know, I think some of the stuff is good.
I think some of it, though, like people start to use, you know, like, I think reminding people of diversity and that, you know, the diversity is important.
You know, if you're talking about the Black Lives Matter rallies and stuff, that that stuff, it's important.
It's super important.
You know, I think some of the reform for police departments is good.
I think I like the idea of there being, if there's people that have mental health issues, you don't, that the police aren't the ones that have to deal with it.
Man, I feel bad a lot of times when I see police officers, and I see this all the time in Los Angeles, police officers having to deal with homeless people and people who are mentally unwell.
Because it's just a lot of pressure on cops.
You know, and the way that they're trained, a lot of their training is probably more in tactical, combatical type training.
And so even just seeing them having to spend their time doing it, you can tell a lot of times the officers want to, you know, they want to be helpful.
But if they could spend, you know, they could probably definitely better spend that time elsewhere and not have as much stress.
So that kind of stuff I like.
So yeah, I think some of those things are good.
You know, I think you're going to see good come out of these types of things.
I think you also see bad come out of these types of things.
You see people, you know, trying to, I don't know, man, you see people trying to, where it's not about equality.
Some people want to make it about control.
You know, I feel like a lot of times I felt attacked just as a white person in the past month, really.
You know, I don't support any type of supremacy.
That's what I don't support.
I don't support, you know, white supremacy, black supremacy, Jewish supremacy, you know, Iranian supremacy.
I don't support any that kind of stuff.
When people are trying to control you, you know, that's when people start to make things about themselves.
And it's not about a conversation.
It's just about them, people controlling you.
That's the part that gets, that doesn't affect.
I feel like that just creates animosity.
But I like the way that you're handling is, man, to go and spend some time, you know, taking a break.
Because I think in the end, still, the way that we can best affect change is we can affect it within ourselves.
And then we can affect it, you know, help affect it and be a part of the loved ones around us, you know.
But really, it's in ourselves.
Because it's hard to make somebody do anything.
You really can't.
And so you just do, you know, you affect it within yourselves.
It's the same thing I think about the masks a lot of times.
You know, people say, you're not, people aren't wearing masks.
Well, that's the thing.
You can't control that.
What you can control is if you wear a mask.
So that's why I say, you know, just that fight, going for the fight.
Some people, you know, we just get caught up in fighting and that kind of stuff is, it's just not helpful to us.
And I don't think it generally, it makes anybody feel good.
I also think that you should have to have a some type of, I don't know if it's education or degree.
I don't know if degree wouldn't really be fair.
I don't know what it should be to have social media.
But that's a whole different topic.
And maybe that's a bad idea.
You know, I don't know.
But anyway, man, I like what you're doing, man.
Going out there and affecting yourself.
That's all we can really do.
You know, and sometimes I think a lot of the stuff that's been going on, it's not helpful.
You know, I have friends that are, you know, of both races who are suddenly activists.
And that's bizarre to me.
Like, they're angrier than usual.
And that's, you know, I don't know if that's, I don't know.
It just seems that like that's not good.
You know, it's like, well, you weren't an activist before.
You just, you know, and that's scary when I start to even find myself, am I becoming like an activist?
Like, I understand standing up for yourself and just sharing what you're feeling and thinking.
I don't know.
It's interesting, man.
There's a lot going on.
But in the end, for me, the only real way I know it'll probably affect change is to just try to affect it within myself and affect how I'm reacting to the environment that's around me.
And yeah, and to vote.
And to work hard.
So those are things, man.
Those are things that I'm just thinking about.
And none of that is, you know, I'm not trying to say I know anything.
Because that is the last thing I'm trying to say is that I know anything.
But I'm just trying to share what I'm kind of feeling, man.
I do want to tell you about this, though, that today's episode is brought to you by, you guessed it, Manscaped.
You know, and it's really, now that's one thing you need to do.
Effect change on your body.
Make sure your penis looks nice or you're, you know, make sure you're vajastic.
Make sure that area looks classy.
Trim around your nipples.
A lot of men grow long, you know, they got them rapunzels around them around them nipples.
You know, like your titties trying to pull somebody up to it.
Trim that up.
You know, summer, even though we don't notice it really because we're trapped.
Summer is in full action and we're thankful for our sponsor today, Manscaped, for keeping us fresh.
Sun's out, bum's out.
And hopefully your pubic hair is not out and showing.
It's not that time of year.
You know, I've had a time where I was, you know, I grew up in the, you know, I grew up in the, I grew up probably a couple hundred years after the Industrial Revolution.
And we didn't have manscape back then.
So you had to take the hair that was on your body around your crotch.
You had to pull it, stretch it from your body and trim it like that.
That old school.
You know, really just something you'd see.
I don't know where you'd see it.
But when you saw it, you wouldn't like it.
That kind of tactic.
But that's over.
You know, because you might nick your nuts.
You might trim any side of your cock.
But actually, Manscape has just released their Shears 2.0 nail kit, which is the perfect add-on to their lawnmower 3.0 or perfect package.
The Shears 2.0 is a luxury four-piece nail kit featuring tempered stainless steel tools, and it includes slashed-tipped tweezers, rounded point scissors, fingernail clippers, and a medium-grit nail file.
You're probably wearing flip-flops, and people don't want to see those nasty, unclipped toes of yours.
They don't have to.
Don't show your dirty feet to people.
Don't show your nasty hands to people.
Take care of your body, trim your body, clip your body.
Do it right.
And for a limited time, our subscribers get two free gifts, the shed travel bag, a $40 value, and the patented high-performance reduced chafing Manscaped boxer briefs.
A beautiful pair.
Get 20% off in free shipping with code Theo-T-H-E-O at Manscaped.com slash Theo.
That's right.
Support the podcast, guys.
We need the support.
We want to stay in business.
Get 20% off in free shipping with code Theo T-H-E-O at manscaped.com slash Theo.
That's free shipping.
20% off.
Theo at manscaped.com slash Theo.
Summer is here.
It's time to Manscaped.
Man, this thing's got me heightened up.
Yeah, the fights were great, though.
I enjoyed watching the fights.
I'm going to tell you also, what you need to know is this.
That this is one extra, one extra, I got to tell you about this, that, you know, I was having some credit problems.
I've been trying to get a refinance.
You know, I have an apartment in Louisiana and I got a bad loan on it.
And my credit has not been good.
And so I'll try to get a refinance.
And they said, when I tried, that my credit has two dings on it.
It has, you know, I didn't have a, I missed a loan payment on my mortgage there and something else, credit issue.
So I got recommended by my friend to Bridge Credit Solutions.
And now I'm working with them to solve my credit problems so that I don't have to wait the nine months or six months or whatever it is of clear, clean credit.
You can get the dings removed from your credit.
And that's what Bridge Credit Solutions is doing for me.
And they are different because they are backed with a 100% money-back guarantee for any items that cannot be removed.
You will not find that anywhere in the credit repair industry.
You know exactly what you're paying for at the beginning of the repair.
No open-ended monthly fees.
It's written in the contract what work is to be done and how much you're paying.
If they do the work, then you pay.
And if they don't do the work, you get your money back.
Now you will need to have bridge report access prior to scheduling your audit.
We cannot go over your credit report without this.
And the bridge report access costs just $1.
You can find all of this on bridgecreditsolutions.com slash T-H-E-O.
They also specialize in helping you with other financial needs, 0% APR loans, business loans, financial counseling, credit monitoring, and debt consolidation.
Bridgecredit Solutions.com slash T-H-E-O.
And they are legit.
That's what I want to tell you is that they are legit.
I'm working with them right now.
And the items that can't be removed, I'm not going to pay for.
And you can't find that anywhere in the credit repair industry.
So check them out.
What else do we got, man?
Sorry, I feel like there was something I was going to tell you about, but anyway, let's get another call or two, man.
Here we go.
Gang.
Rat Kane, what's up, man?
This is Clint Campbell, aka Murder.
What's up, murder?
And that's a risky name you got, man, but I respect it.
You know, it's risky if you go to court, it's risky.
But if you go into a bar and people looking at you funny, dude, then it's more unrisky then.
Onward.
Starville, Mississippi.
Me and my wife just wanted to give you a call, man.
Just let you know we love you.
We with you, man.
Know everything's crazy out there.
Just keep your head up, man.
We love you from Mississippi.
Gang, gang, bro.
Gang, man.
Thanks, man.
That was nice of You, dude.
It was nice of you to say that and to include your wife.
Yeah, you know, and people need to hear that sometimes, man.
People need to hear that people are thinking about it.
I mean, I got a lot of nice calls this past two weeks.
You know, I know it's been a few weeks since I did an episode just solo, and I'm going to start doing those more often.
You know, I've just needed a break over time.
You know, and I've been trying to adjust my diet and, you know, because this blood work I got, I was not doing well.
And I was not doing well.
I had vitamin deficiencies, they call it.
You know, low stuff in you.
You know, if God look at, you know, looked up under the hood, he'd say, damn, you missing some shit I put in here.
And so, you know, I'm trying to get that, get my health back.
And it takes a while.
That kind of stuff takes a while.
You know, some of this has been nice, you know, during this virus time.
You know, it's been nice to have some reflection.
You know, it definitely...
And man, that's nice.
It's so nice.
There's no, everybody's quiet.
It's quiet.
Now, I don't think it's good for us as humans long term or anything like that, but it's quiet.
You know, it's been nice to have some time to reflect.
I've been able to talk with friends recently that I just, you know, and stop over by friends' houses and just spend time with people.
You know, and that's been nice just to slow it down.
You know, to get out into nature some and realize, oh, I like it out here.
I forgot this was an option.
I got caught up in this rat race.
You know, and caught up in a game that I don't even know.
I didn't even say I told, I never even signed up for the game.
It's just you get going and you get into college and then you feel like you got to get the job and then you got to, and you have to support yourself.
You have to be working, but just this insatiable thing of more.
That's what I've been on, kind of.
I've been on that.
You know, I've been just been on that.
But love you too, man.
I love you guys too, man.
Down there in Starkville.
And shout out my friend TJ Malwany.
I went and saw him one down there.
And he used to play football down there at Mississippi State.
Gang, brother.
Let's take another call here.
985-664-9503.
Hi, Theo.
I'm calling from Toronto, Canada.
And with everything going on, I've been out of work for four months now.
And I'm kind of running out of money at this point.
But I also feel more calm than I felt in a really long time, which is very bizarre.
So my question to you is, do you think it's better to be broke and happy or rich and miserable?
I think there's more options than that.
I appreciate the call.
I think there's more options than that.
I think you can be wealthy and be happy.
I think you can be poor and be happy.
You know, some of the most beautiful smiles I've ever seen have been in foreign countries of just full poverty.
You know, complete poverty.
I'm talking somebody, you know, people drinking out of each other's penises, really.
Real, you know.
You got to be thirsty to cut that faucet on.
You feel me?
And, but the happiest people.
You know, the happiest people.
So I think there's ways to do it.
I do think, you know, I do think there's been a I think there's too much infatuation on the bottom line for companies and businesses and business owners.
You know, I think you want to do well, but also remembering the value of your employees and of people you work with and that you want them to do well too.
So I think there's a better way to do wealth and to do, you know, not making money your God.
I think there's a better way to do it than the way that we've been doing it.
And I think a lot of that change has to come from within people.
And I think there's a thing of too wealthy.
I think at a certain point, some people don't need to be that wealthy.
I don't think that I believe in meritocracy.
I believe in people working hard and that's how you earn wealth and that's what you do.
I believe in the hard work that pays off.
I believe in that.
But I also believe at a certain point, you know, there should be creative ways to give back.
Now, some people, you want them to have the wealth.
You know, like people, different, you know, people who run big companies like, you know, what's a big company?
Kraft Mac and Cheese.
You know, you want certain people the money to go to, you know, you want them to, because they're going to create jobs for other people.
You know, if the money goes to freaking Ronald Kraft, he ain't doing shit.
He might be shooting up over there by the airport or by Greyhound.
And shout out, we're going to do, I got some Greyhound calls that came in.
I'm going to get to them later in the week.
But, you know, Bob Kraft, the money goes to him.
He's going to, you know, some people, you need the money to go through them because they're creators.
They're going to create employment for tens and thousands of people.
But sometimes I feel like there should be a cap on how much money you can have as a human.
So there'll be more money for other people to get.
But I think lifting people you work for up, you know, and helping them be, you know, excited about the money that, you know, people working towards a company and, you know, I think that stuff's important.
People, oh, I'll work for a company I'm prideful in because I'm going to make money as well.
The boss, they're not always trying to just keep me at this one space and not reward my efforts.
And I hope we'll see some of that too on a national scale.
You know, maybe I'm being too political in some of this episode, but if we have more jobs back in the U.S., you know, just because there's a bigger value in a lot of things than just than the value of the money of it.
But there's a special fun, man, of not having anything.
Man, there's a special type of joy of having nothing.
Say, fuck them, bro.
You know?
Because nobody can take nothing away from you then.
Man, and that is a freedom.
Nobody can take nothing, but he's trying to take, and nobody expect, you got the, you are the underdog.
Nobody expects it.
So when you show up and you deliver, bruh, there's no, there's nothing that feels better.
Man, I've been right there, man.
I've been right there most of my life, honestly.
I'm saying, all right, you don't expect, okay, oh, I can't, huh?
And not even an individual person telling you you can't.
Just the way the system is.
The way it's all set up.
They don't expect you.
And you show up.
And you that baby of danger.
And you that baby danger, boy.
Gang shit, man.
Let's hear what else, man.
We got some other calls that came in.
Yo, Theo, it's CJ from Ohio, man.
What's up, CJ?
Thanks for the call, bud.
Just calling, check in with directing himself.
See how you're doing.
All the news going on now with Chris and stuff.
Just checking in on you.
Yeah, and he's referencing Chris DeLee and the stuff.
Some of these calls were a couple weeks.
I haven't done a regular episode.
Onward?
I know how close you guys are, and it's got to be tough, man.
But appreciate everything you do on the podcast and help people out.
It's awesome.
Going through some stuff myself, man.
It's hard to see, like, everyone says, oh, it works out in the end, and everything ends up the way it should be.
And it's just hard to see that, man, going through a divorce and moving in with my mom, you know, at 30 years old.
And it's just like, God, I'm thankful I have that to move into.
It's just scary to put that next step, man.
And just, I got school loans and just a lot of stuff going on, man.
It's cool to hear all the positive, good stuff you're doing.
And I don't know, man.
Just look for some positivity.
Gang, bro.
Thanks for the call, man.
You know, I appreciate your sentiment.
Yeah, just thinking about me and just thinking about Chris, you know.
You know, I need to message him and just let him know that I'm thinking about him.
You know, I think you have a, you know, a nice opportunity here, man.
You know, I know it's probably got to be tough and it's got to be a real U-turn in your dreams to be back in with mom and you over there and y'all splitting the lasagna and doing that.
And now you watching the shit you guys are, you know, suddenly all applying for the mother-son prices right weekend or whatever, doing all of that shit.
I feel you, bro.
You know, suddenly, you know, you're stuck watching a This Is Us marathon with her.
I feel you.
I feel you're in that.
And it's going to be hard.
You're probably going to have to listen to your mom and do a lot of that.
You know, I just challenge you, man.
There were times where I had to go back into things like that.
You know, I even remember about eight years ago, I went back to Louisiana and I was working at a bartending.
And I just didn't know, man.
I didn't know if comedy was for me.
I didn't know what I wanted.
You know, I moved for a relationship.
I was in a rough relationship I shouldn't have been in.
I didn't even like this girl, but I was in it.
And I wish I'd have handled myself better then, just looking back.
You know, it'll be hard, but just, you know, just do your best, man.
Try to be loving.
Maybe learn a new card game or something.
Play with your mom.
Because I think you sound like a guy that's still going to achieve his dreams and his goals.
But I know that's a lot at one time with the relationship.
And maybe God's giving you that relationship with your mom, you know?
And y'all can't have sex, but y'all could do everything else, man.
You know, not, you know, I mean, you could kiss, but just real quick.
You know, nothing, you can't do everything, but you could just kiss fast, you know, just like a regular goodnight, you know, kind of thing.
But it could just be, you know, I know it's going to be hard to see that.
I know I'm preaching, you know, but it's going to be okay, bro.
It's going to be okay.
You know, I would just, if you can, it's going to be hard.
Try to manage yourself the best you can while you're going through this.
I don't want you to look back on it and be like, damn, You know, I had this opportunity to spend time with my mother, to be a part, you know, to try and help her to do, and I saw it as a liability, you know.
But, but again, man, I'm preaching and shit, bro.
But best of luck, man.
Keep your head up and learn Jen Rummy, bro.
Michigan Rummy.
Those are some good ones I learned recently.
Scrabble.
I haven't seen This Is Us, but my brother and his wife absolutely love it, man.
And it's probably a good time to watch it.
You know, I know it deals with a lot of racial stuff, and so maybe it's a good time to, you know, just to see people, you know, beige power, man.
You know, this is all going to end beige.
So it'd be a good time to see some of that gang shit.
Peace.
Here we go, man.
Another call.
Hey, Theo, just I was reading an article in the Los Angeles Times about the Chris Delia situation, and I see why you have so much trouble with the media and how they portray things and how they twist stuff.
I mean, the Los Angeles Times is supposed to be, you know, during this pandemic and all this stuff supposed to be the source of well-edited, well-researched, you know, good news.
They have taken quotes from the King's thing as law of what is happening in light of what EverChris did.
And I just feel like that's such bullshit that they would try to use that information from a podcast, like some keenest thing, like a comedy podcast, and try to rope you into all this as someone who knew something.
So I see why you have your feelings about the media.
And I guess I'm just curious in this time, you know, who you feel you're able to listen to and who you feel is giving you information that's positive or, you know, something that you can feel like is factual or well-researched or bipartisan, all that nonsense.
Gang, bro.
I appreciate that call, man.
Yeah, and again, some of these calls are a couple weeks back, and I'm not trying to rehash old stuff or anything, but yeah, you know, yeah, Los Angeles Times did an article, and they, you know, people online, there was this older lady who used to be a comedian,
and, you know, she was calling out clips from King and the Sting, you know, and just, yeah, I mean, just, yeah, the reliability of a lot of journalism is ratchet.
I mean, it's like graffiti on walls.
It's like, just believe, you know, you read Larry Sucks Dick and then you believe it.
Do you even know where Larry is?
Is he in the community?
Where is he?
You know, who's he?
You know, is it, have anybody seen him?
You know, it just, it's like believing graffiti.
So I'm not shocked, man.
You know, I'm just, I'm not shocked.
But when you see that stuff start to come and you see your name in it, yeah, that kind of stuff gets uncomfortable because you're like, this is supposed to be credible.
The sources there's people are citing, just unbelievable sources for everything.
You know, and it's weird with news because you don't want the government to control the news.
But the media has so much power just by the sheer volume and the scope of it that they can cause a lot of trouble.
You know, a lot more, I think a lot more people have social and a lot more people have issues online than they do in real life.
You know, it's just giving us a, it's just, the news has just gotten, it's gotten unreliable.
And some people, some of the smartest people I know believe us, everything on the news.
And to me, that is just baffling.
It's almost like they want to.
And I noticed it for myself.
If I'm going to the news, if I'm going to these articles and I'm going to just see all the headlines, I want that.
You know, I'm wanting that sort of, I'm looking for that food, that, that, whatever that, it's junk food.
I know it is.
I'm looking for an excuse to be angry.
I'm looking for it.
I'm looking for it.
So it's really, it starts with us, man.
So where do I get good stuff from?
I think I just communicate directly with people, see and see what's going on.
You know, I do think it's a time where you have to trust your instincts.
But I don't know where there's a good source for news.
You know, I believe this, I don't trust Hollywood.
And I believe Hollywood does this.
They build you up.
If you want to be in the system, you can get built up.
You know, and you pay for that along the way.
You know, you pay agents.
You pay, what is it called?
Public relation people.
That sort of thing.
Publicists, that sort of thing.
And I'm not saying these are bad people.
I'm just saying this is the system that I view sometimes.
And I might have a negative view of the system.
I understand that.
They build you up, but then at a certain point, then articles come that tear you down.
And now some of it can be based on your own behavior.
I'm not saying people's behaviors don't influence it.
They tear you down.
And then now you got to pay lawyers.
So all the money you made, you got to pay the lawyers.
And then you're done.
So it's just this dirty hill, man.
It's this dirty hill.
But It's risky, man.
It's risky.
So I don't know.
I don't know the answer to it.
But I know it doesn't make me feel that good when I'm around it.
And I know I try and be careful with my career that I don't.
It's just scary, bro.
It's scary to be a part of something that can do that.
Let's take another call that came in right here, man.
We got to finish this episode up, man.
Thank you guys for being a part of this.
Sorry if I, you know, maybe I have too much political stuff.
I'm not really apologizing.
I just, you know, I know it's a tough time for a lot of people.
I know it is.
I know it feels scary right now.
But it's also there's spaces and places where it's not.
And we got to find those, man.
Gang.
All right, yo.
Your boy Kenny.
I want to thank you for sharing this week, man.
I really appreciate it.
I guess my thoughts are that, you know, people are a duality, man.
Everyone's a good and bad.
Nobody's good or bad, man.
You know, it's...
It doesn't make you good or bad and you don't make them good.
I don't know, man.
You just...
You know, you can be real.
Even if you can't be good or bad, you can decide to be real.
You can be honest.
Gang, man, I appreciate the call, man.
We can try, you know.
I try.
You know?
I mean, I make, you know, we all do.
Yeah, that's what's tough for me is like, how do we quit seeing that people are people?
We're human.
We do good stuff.
We do wrong stuff.
You know?
You could give a dollar to a baby and then still also, you know, go touch a neighbor's wife's beehole or something and be naughty and be nasty.
We're just people.
We're just people.
And some days we do it right and some days we do it wrong.
Some moments we do it right.
Some moments we do it wrong.
Yeah.
We really are, dog.
But that conveyor belt, it keeps serving it, bro.
It keeps serving more, you know, whatever it is, life keeps coming.
But whoever you are, man, I'm glad you know that.
You know, we don't, you know, none of us, none of us are, you know, it's just a, You just got to keep trying.
You know?
But we good, man.
Everybody's alright, dude.
If you get up there to freaking Maine, get up there to New Hampshire.
You need urgent care, bruh?
You got a fucking crab net stuck in your sphincter, dog?
Don't worry.
Don't even forget about it, dude.
In a heartbeat, dude, I'll put a fucking...
You don't even have to swallow.
You know, I'll put two Bavarian glazed up in that bastard.
I'll put two chocolate cream-filled, a couple Long Johns in you.
You'll be fine, dude.
You dislocated your wrist, bro?
Don't forget about it.
I'll glaze that bitch.
You feel me?
I'll glaze that bitch over by the Duncan.
You're going to be fine, bro.
Throw a couple donnets on that bitch, son.
What else?
I want to take one more call that gets us out of here on something cool, bro.
Um, uh, Let me see what we got here.
Here we go, man.
This was a call came in a couple weeks ago.
This is talking about that gang shit.
Hey, CF.
This is James calling you from north of your borders, way up in Canada here.
Welcome, welcome to America verbally and audibly, gang.
Saskatchewan.
This is kind of like the Dakotas and Oklahoma all smashed together.
I don't know if you've ever been up here to Saskatchewan.
Oh, yeah, I've been up there, dude.
A guy tried to give me a hat one time, and also I thought the guy was also, you know, pedophile.
And I told him, I said, I'm an adult.
I think he had me, I think I just looked young at the time, and it was real snowy out.
And so he pulled over to talk to me.
I just yelled, nah, nah, nah, keep going, man.
I'm an adult.
And he fucking left, man.
So onward.
I kind of said it in your accent to begin with because I'm watching your podcast.
So there you are.
Anyways, Theo, I just seen a moment you had there where you got a call and it cracked you a little bit.
And it just trying to let off that same thing for me in my heart.
And it was just due to you and your reaction.
And at first, I didn't think nothing in that call.
And then I saw the way you reacted to it.
And then it, you know, through you, it stuck struck through to me.
And I've been drinking a little heavily in my own regard.
And it was that call about the masters, get sober.
Been sober for a year.
And in my life, it's been about six years since I lost somebody close to me.
And this is the first year where I'm starting to feel a little bit alright.
So a little thing like that.
It's a nice little push in my subconscious when you feel that little frozen in your boy Theo crack up, crack up yourself, and you start to think about the picture a little bit bigger.
And thank you for everything you do, sir.
You're the best, man.
Keep her going.
Oh, gang, bro.
I'm not the best, man, but that's sweet of you to say, man.
Yeah, you know, it's magical, man, how that kind of stuff happens, man.
When people make you kind of feel something.
Because, yeah, the guy called.
He got a year or a couple years.
His girlfriend gave him the coin to congratulate him for not drinking, and he didn't think that she noticed, and then she did notice.
And yeah, you know, it had me cracked up.
Yeah, you know, and it's, and it's powerful.
It's not, and it has nothing to do with me, man.
And I appreciate you, the call, you know, and I'm glad you're feeling better about your friend passing and or at least getting some peace from it.
But there's, that's, there's something, you know, there's some other wavelength where we all connect.
Because that's crazy, man, that that guy left a voicemail on a machine, a human voice, and I listened to it a week later and had a, had a visceral reaction to it.
And that made me feel something.
That shit fucking lightning in my damn heart.
You know, like a fucking fat animal just eating chocolates in my heart.
That shit had me, you know, just had me feeling.
And then you hear it and then you feel.
It's just, I don't know, man.
There's just a greater, that, and that power, whatever, that, that, that wavelength, whatever that is, bro.
That's, you know, that's that spice, man.
That's, you know, that's that gas station dick pill from God.
You know, that's the thing that, that's power.
It's powerful.
And I, I, and look, man, I'm just part of the chain.
You're part of the chain now.
And I, you know, I don't know.
I just, there's something about feeling.
There's something about hearing how people feel that I like it.
I like it, man.
I think, you know, I don't know.
It's interesting, man.
It's interesting.
But thanks for the call, man.
And actually, I talked to that fella on the phone the other day, and we had a nice chat.
And, you know, we just keep going.
The conveyor belt keeps going.
We're on this bitch.
You know, hug somebody.
Move in with your mother.
Help her recycle.
Do the shit.
You know, understand that people are people.
You know, we just, we keep trying.
Support people.
You know, if somebody's struggling, you know, try and support them.
We do what we can.
We're not perfect, man.
You know, and look, I'll be honest, dude, I've been jerking off, bruh.
And I'm disappointed about it.
You know, I didn't think I was going to be jerking off and then, bam, I'm touching my body and leaking my wiener out.
You know, with semen.
You know, and making semen out of my, you know, just it just.
We do what we can, bruh.
But the time keeps going, man.
Time is no stranger.
That is for sure, isn't it?
We'll play the song one more time.
This is Stevie Starlight off his new album, Unnaturally Happy.
Time is No Stranger.
And we got new gang gang slides available.
We got the new website.
You can check out Theovon.com.
Great ways to submit video and audio for the show.
And, you know, be good to yourself.
You know, you probably deserve it.
You know, I bet you really do.
Gang shit, man.
Peace.
Lovers laughing in the springtime.
Near the day.
On my way to see you.
The lives of people turn to stare There's nothing left to see You and me Time is no stranger If you're all by yourself Get it, Stevie!
This time is no danger Cause you found someone else You once told me to be patient Love will find its way Wait and see Where I waited so
frustrated For a day to never come Look what's happened to me Time is no stranger When you're all by yourself This time there's no danger Cause you
found someone else And all them times you lay by my side And I feel like something tonight But you say you're alive And it's real, it's real, it's real
There you go, and you can get that again.
That's Stevie Starlight.
And you can support that man.
He's It's Never Too Late to Come Over.
Remember that hit?
We've had it as part of the program for a long time.
And Stevie's a beautiful man.
And he's always right on time, man.
And we'll have a link to his new album, Unnaturally Happy.
And again, be good to yourself, man.
I'm going to try my best.
You try your best.
And we'll do it again soon.
We'll run it back, gang.
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Jonathan Kite, and welcome to Kite Club, a podcast where I'll be sharing thoughts on things like current events, stand-up stories, and seven ways to pleasure your partner.
The answer may shock you.
Sometimes I'll interview my friends.
Sometimes I won't.
And as always, I'll be joined by the voices in my head.
You have three new voice messages.
A lot of people are talking about Kite Club.
I've been talking about Kite Club for so long, longer than anybody else.
So great.
Hi, Suiar.
Is it there?
Anyone who doesn't listen to Kite Club is a dodgy bloody wanker.
Jamain.
I'll take a quarter potter with cheese and a McFlurry.
Sorry, sir, but our ice cream machine is broken.
I think Tom Hanks just butt-dialed me.
Anyway, first rule of Kite Club is tell everyone about Kite Club.
Second rule of Kite Club is tell everyone about Kite Club.
Third rule, like and subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts or watch us on YouTube, yeah?
