Lilliana Gomez, a 24-year-old California teacher (bachelor’s in English, 2023), shares her viral TikTok backlash—labeled "torta" and a "whore" for tattoos—after seeking connection at bars, facing three years of rejection despite active dating. Critics like Pearl argue weight loss (e.g., 1,200-calorie diets) and compromises (like removing piercings) could attract better partners, framing societal expectations as unconditional. Gomez counters that self-worth isn’t tied to male validation, defending her $45K salary against claims teaching is "overpaid" while men endure riskier jobs. The debate exposes tensions between personal agency and societal pressure, questioning whether dating success hinges on adapting to outdated norms or redefining them. [Automatically generated summary]
Welcome to another episode of Pearl Daily here on the Audacity Network.
I wanted to start by saying thank you guys so much for tuning in tonight.
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I appreciate you guys dearly.
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Okay.
So today I actually have an interesting show because when we do reaction videos on this show, usually the people don't want to come on or they don't.
It's very rare you get them to actually come on and have a conversation.
So pretty cool.
Today we actually have Liliana Gomez on the show and I'm going to show you guys her original TikTok.
It was about women approaching men.
So we're going to show the TikTok and then we're going to bring her up.
All right.
Okay, so this was her original TikTok.
The loneliness epidemic is real.
I went to two bars.
Not just one.
Two bars and I got rejected by not one, but two guys.
Now I usually don't go out like this, but I was feeling like I was starving for affection and I just wanted somebody to make me feel pretty.
Like my mother once told me, sometimes you go out not because you want to have fun, but you want just one person to make you feel special.
And I did that tonight.
And maybe, just maybe it was out of desperation.
Not that I don't have a lot to live for.
I have plenty.
But I went out hoping to just feel a raw connection with somebody.
And I got rejected by two people.
And I felt so terrible that I ended up walking home alone to sober myself up because this was not the night that I planned out for myself.
The lonely epidemic, the loneliness epidemic is so, so real.
And it's such a raw experience for me.
And for a lot of people.
Now, it is not that I don't have a pretty, pretty girl, but it is not that I'm looking necessarily in the wrong places.
But it is the wrong time.
And unfortunately, I have knocked on every door that I possibly could have.
And every door has come to me to no avail.
Also, be careful walking alone at night because I just had somebody trail me.
It is sad what we do when we're starving for affection.
The last person that I was spending time with told me that they liked me, but I wanted so badly to be a girlfriend that it turned him away.
Isn't that crazy?
I just wanted a connection.
I just wanted someone to hold me and make me feel like the world wasn't ending.
And I spent all of my time trying to make this person feel special so that they wouldn't leave me just for them to say that I was trying too hard and for them to move on.
It's absolutely crazy.
So now I'm just listening to my music.
I want to like a three, like a three-mile walk.
This I would not advise to you.
I just, I was in a funky head space, so I'm doing it.
But be careful out there, ladies.
Be careful.
Okay, so she puts this on the internet, puts it on TikTok.
She then realizes the reality of the internet, which is that a lot of people, a lot of people are going.
A lot of people are going to react to this.
So then myself and some other YouTubers did react to this.
I'm actually friends with Anton Daniels.
I think that's who she was responding to.
Make this full screen.
Here we go.
Hi, my name is Liana Gomez, and I've been the subject of scrutiny for over 24 hours.
24 hours?
That's rookie numbers.
You know what I mean?
Sorry.
I posted a video online that was meant for my close friends.
And yes, I did share it online publicly, but I found it to be the topic of a YouTube channel with over a million followers.
And it was a personal video that I did not give permission to be leaked.
Now, that being said, I was talking about the loneliness epidemic and how it is difficult for anybody of any gender to find themselves in a position where they are rejected when they are looking via dating apps, going out in person, making friends, trying to find someone to connect with.
And honestly, giving up all resorts and going to a bar like I did and just trying to see if I hit it off with somebody.
That's all it was.
Just me being single and wanting to hit it off with somebody.
And I got rejected by two men.
And I posted a video about how frustrating it was.
Not because I got rejected by two men, but just because I have been searching for three years, hoping that I could find a connection with somebody.
And that is not wrong.
That is not wrong.
But these two YouTubers sourced my video and talked about how I am not how me as a woman being rejected speaks leaps and bounds for what the dating narrative is.
And I have been the subject of the scrutiny of many YouTubers of over 100,000 people that commented on that video and talked about how I am a torta.
I'm fat.
I am overweight.
How the septum theory is real and how I hate men when, you know, that makes so much sense because I hit on men in the bar and I wanted their company.
How my tattoos make me a whore.
So much judgment that I would never, never dare to presume or dare partake to give to anybody has been put onto me.
So I decided to take into my own hands to talk about this issue.
And I reached out to both YouTubers and asked if I can make commentary on these videos because I think there's a deeper social implication.
Oh, she only asked for commentary.
Usually, that's actually not, that's a little better.
Normally they just crash out and say, take it down, take it, you know, commentary.
It's not given that opportunity.
Not only did they steal that video.
Okay, you can't steal videos on the internet.
It's open.
It's what's it called?
Fair use.
Once you have it on TikTok, there's no stealing a video on a public platform.
But they did not include me or even, I mean, I guess it's already implied, but they did not.
They don't have to.
They don't have.
People do reactions to my stuff all the time.
They do not have to.
Allow me to give permission or comment on it.
So I'm taking a step further and I am going to the Drew Barrymore show and I am sending in an inquiry and hopefully she accepts it because I love that woman and I love that show.
I doubt it.
I was going to go on that show a few years ago, but they never got back to me.
I mean, we'll see.
But here's what I have put.
So bear with me.
I posted a video on TikTok about the loneliness epidemic and what it is like to be rejected as a woman who pursues men.
I am a passionate, always vulnerable and earnest individual with a fiery disposition.
I meant to break a cast, a stereotype in the dating scene that implies one misleading narrative and all of its complexities.
That it isn't okay for women to be lonely and pursue company in whatever form that may take.
The dating scene has a lot of rigidity surrounding the idea that men are to pursue women and that women who pursue are desperate and less than.
I don't believe that's true.
I like to enable the ideology that I am brave and intelligent and more importantly, capable of getting what I want.
So I pursue men.
In doing so, I have encountered a lot of frustration and rejection.
When confessing feelings to a small group of friends, my video was leaked to an online YouTube source and sources that have lamented me for pursuing men and more importantly, implied that women deserve the loneliness we receive because we pushed the Me Too movement and metaphorically chose the bear.
I've been shamed for my weight, my jewelry, and my tattoos.
The expression.
Yeah, that's the internet.
I mean, you know what?
I had a two-hour video picking apart every part of my face.
Every single part.
They told me why it was ugly.
That's kind of the inner questions I bear with pride have now become the subject of scrutiny for over 80,000, now 100,000 individuals in less than 24 hours.
Here are the links to the videos that reference me, insult me, and dare not give me my proper accreditation.
So, yeah, they don't have to do that.
Help is spread because I have so much to say.
I have so much to say, and I have every right to say so.
And I'm feeling pretty adamant about this.
And I believe that this community, I chose TikTok to post because I knew that there is a strong community of women and men out there that are supportive of one another and embrace one another.
Oh, no, there's not.
Sorry.
Oh, no, not on TikTok.
Sorry.
Another.
And unfortunately, this got leaked to the wrong hands.
And I want to talk about this.
I want to talk and I want to listen.
And I think this should be a bigger issue.
So let me know what you have to think.
Yeah.
Welcome to the internet.
Okay.
So you're not ugly, Pearl, just handsome.
I'll take it.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Okay.
So we're going to bring up Liliana.
And welcome to the show.
Hold on.
Add to the stage.
Wait, wait.
There we go.
Welcome to the show, Liliana.
How are you tonight?
I'm pretty good, actually.
Are you a police officer?
No, this was my dad's shirt from 9-11 I found in the garage.
And I made it my own.
So I love this shirt.
It's just something from the past.
Okay.
Your dad, he was like a firefighter during 9-11.
No, no, not at all.
I was like, that's really sad.
Okay, go ahead.
No, I was just going to say that I've kind of come a little bit full circle in the sense that like, I'm actually really not upset that those videos.
I know that it may have, I may have been a little bit passionate and I'm sure it rubbed people the wrong way.
I'm sure of that.
But I was never really upset that the videos got popular.
I was more upset that I didn't get to talk about them because, you know, I actually really enjoy like, I don't mind if people disagree with me.
I like to talk and I find these conversations interesting.
And, you know, I always like to learn from something.
So I saw it as an opportunity and to be able to comment on it, whether or not you agree or disagree with me, like that.
That's an opportunity for me.
And I think the main part of that video that I would emphasize is the accreditation part.
Maybe you don't have to, but it's a kindness to say, hey, you know, I understand.
Yeah, I understand that like this video may not get the attention that you had initially planned.
And I think that part of it, like just person to person, I was put in the position of getting a lot of online bullying.
And that's not something that I was prepared for, but it happened.
And, you know, it's over with.
So, you know, it's okay.
And I have some thick skin.
So I read it.
I wanted to start with why don't you tell them your background?
So your age, where you're from, whatever you want to share before we get too much into it.
Go ahead.
I'm 24.
I'm from California, which you're probably going to say, wow, that makes a lot of sense.
But believe it or not, I would consider myself independent.
I'm not very liberal.
I'm actually a mix between liberal and conservative.
I've actually had a lot of friendships that I had to steer away from because I felt like they were too politically charged.
I am a teacher.
And for the most part, I just believe that love is love.
And, you know, where did you get your degree in?
Was it like English or just education?
Yeah.
So it was actually English literature.
So I got my bachelor's in 2023.
I took a year off.
Just was working minimum wage jobs for a little while.
I'm back in school now and I am teaching.
I'm an intern.
So I am working.
I know privately you said you're, so you're 24.
And then in the video, you said you like had an ex-situationship like three years ago.
I'm just wondering what your dating background is and like what that experience has been like for you before this video, before the approaching at the bar.
I know your generation is a little bit like delayed.
Yeah, I don't, I don't, I genuinely don't feel that I have the experience that most women have.
I, you know, and that could be for a multitude of reasons, but I have struggled with dating.
I had a three-year-long relationship and I have, I still love that person very much to this day.
And unfortunately, we just grew out of love and we change as people and that happens.
But I would definitely say I've read a lot of psychology books and a lot of self-help books.
And one of the books.
And was it like, was it like a serious relationship or was it more?
Okay.
So this was like we're meeting each other's families.
We might marry each other and then it ended.
Yeah.
We lived with each other and we met each other's family.
It was very, very serious.
I was very, I was very much in love.
Now, I have read a lot of those self-help books and I've learned that I am what you would call an anxious attachment style, which honestly, you can say that I'm overweight and I am, but I, I think the thing that scares men away is like my want for love, you know, like, yes.
And that that pushes people away.
Um, and for the right people, it draws them in because I'm like I said, like, I'm a very like always open, always earnest.
Like sometimes I can be really intense, but for the most part, like, I just want, I just want a connection and I'm not afraid to say, hey, I want that.
So, no, when hot women have anxious attachment styles, they get completely different results.
Yeah.
But I'm not even saying that to judge you.
I used to be like, I used to be pretty overweight myself.
I lost weight.
I had a lot of comments say, you know, I'm this, I'm that.
I'm super overweight.
But, you know, they don't know the full story.
I lost 50 pounds this year.
You know, I'm working on losing weight and I'm working on improving myself because, you know, actually, I think that some overweight women are some of the most beautiful women I've ever seen.
That's just my opinion.
I think of them as goddesses almost, like Venetian.
But personally, I was an athlete all of high school.
I was on the swim team.
I was on the water polo team.
So it became ingrained in my personality to be athletic.
So when I did go through a breakup and then I ended up spending a lot of time by myself and maybe developed some habits that are not good for me, I became very insecure.
So I am losing weight and I am working towards being someone that I want to be happy with.
So.
Well, okay.
That's that's good.
At least you're headed in the right direction.
But you know, it doesn't really matter what you find beautiful.
It's like what men find beautiful, right?
Like, do you understand why you got the reaction you got?
Do you understand it?
I do, and I don't because I think that it depends on who you talk to.
Like, I know this is where we're going to disagree.
There are a lot of men, like, okay, you actually mentioned it yourself.
Like, you said that, believe it or not, she rejects a lot of men.
And I, I do.
I get a lot of attention.
I mean, if you saw my dating app, you would see that I'm getting men.
Sorry.
You know, yes and no.
Yes and no.
After that video exploded, I had like lots and lots and lots of requests from black men who were very interested in me.
They're just not my type.
I hate you guys.
Sorry.
It's true.
It's true.
I'm not going to say it's not true.
I'm a very honest person.
I know.
I'm just having you too.
And it's like the shift.
It's like when you're over 200, it's only black guys interested.
And then you get closer to 150, all the white guys holler.
I also, like, I had a lot of white men, a lot of Mexican, a lot of Indian.
I get a mix, but I will say that on dating apps, like if I swiped right on everybody, guaranteed I've had hundreds of men, but I don't.
You know, I'm like, I am.
Attracted to what I'm attracted to.
And I'm telling you, I can say this because I lived it.
My sister even lived it more because she was, what are you like, two, how tall are you?
I am 5'9 and I'm 240.
No, 235 pounds right now.
I'm gonna say 250 just because women always lie by like 10 pounds.
Sorry.
No, genuinely.
Because I'm not afraid to admit it.
Last January, I was 286 pounds.
You're kind of similar.
My sister was around the same weight and height as you.
You kind of look like her, actually.
And I lost weight to be 235 pounds as of today.
Honestly, I don't look that different.
I don't.
I know, but here's the challenge.
You don't get brownie points from like, like, imagine like you're an alcoholic.
And then it's like you have the one person that just never drank alcohol.
You know, and the one person that's like, oh, I overcame alcoholism.
And it's like, well, you shouldn't have been an alcoholic to begin with.
You know what I mean?
You don't get brownie points for like being an, you know, overcoming something that should have never been a problem.
Well, but at least you're going in the right direction.
Yeah, but I'm a human being.
I'm not perfect.
And nobody is.
And anybody who says they is, they are, they are, they would be lying.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
And it doesn't really matter what.
I'm going to, I'm going to actually explain why your video went viral from my point of view.
It's because you were complaining about getting rejected by two men.
And for men, I know men that approach women for a living.
And a good pickup artist has to approach 100 women and get rejected 90 times.
So it's kind of like you're coming on the internet complaining and saying, oh, I got rejected by two men.
I'm so lonely, which is fine.
We're not used to doing that.
I'd say you're kind of abnormal for most women.
Like most women don't approach.
I'm not even saying.
Yeah, I'm not saying you're wrong for doing that.
I actually would encourage it, but the reaction is just like boohoo, cry me a river, you know, because men have been doing that.
They're like, they're like, I got rejected twice every day.
Everyone's telling me I'm ugly.
And you can say that yourself because you're telling, you said that you reject hundreds of men, right?
I do.
I do.
And, you know, that's, that was not the point of the video.
And that's, that's the thing is maybe I misrepresented myself.
That was not the point.
The point was like how hard it is just to be lonely.
It was not that I got rejected by two men.
It was the fact that I was feeling really lonely.
And I honestly, like, I just wanted someone to talk to.
And I totally get it.
But what the problem you're going to get to is men are way more lonely.
Like, do you know what I'm saying?
Like, men will say, boohoo, you're lonely.
You have 100 suitors ready to go, even being an overweight woman.
An overweight man's not going to have that.
Does that make sense?
Sure, that makes sense.
You're saying like, you're getting like a tenth of what men experience and you're complaining.
And that's why I went viral.
Yeah, I can see that.
Yeah.
So it's not.
Because women, I just don't think we'll ever experience true loneliness because there's always people wanting to hang out with us.
Like you could, I can tell you're a charismatic girl.
You could go to a cafe and make friends.
Like, I think you would easily get along with people.
I do draw a lot of people towards me just because I tend to be a like, for example, the reason why I posted that video really is because I always kind of have this mentality that if this sounds bad, but if I put myself in the position of being vulnerable first, then maybe someone else will open up as well.
Like if I open up and share something that I'm going through, then maybe somebody else will be comfortable to do that as well.
And I feel like you have to be a very like humble person to do that.
It's not easy to do to show people your vulnerabilities or your weaknesses.
But honestly, like I always think that there's an opportunity.
If I lay myself down at their feet, then who knows what opportunities will arise from that?
Like if I say, hey, I struggle a lot with this, this, and this, and I'm not a perfect person.
I'm just going to be honest about it.
But I think at the end of the day, like I have love to give and those that are willing to accept me will accept me.
I think that that garners a lot of attention from the people that are willing to surround themselves with that kind of energy.
I don't.
You said in the video, the last person you were spending time with, you said he left because of like an anxious attachment style.
Was that the boyfriend or was that the self?
Was that the boyfriend?
That was somebody else.
I was not being very nice to myself in that video when I worded the way I worded it because honestly, I deserve better than that guy.
100%.
Like that guy was someone who I'm a very passionate person.
He was a very nonchalant person, like didn't have very many passions, didn't have very many interests, didn't have a lot to talk about.
He had just come out of a relationship and that was why he didn't want another relationship.
He was not ready for one.
And you could say, I remember in the video, you said he wasn't attracted to me.
I was too fat.
But, well, I would definitely disagree just because of lose 50 pounds and come back.
I bet you he'll be a lot more willing.
I'm telling you.
Men are very, but men are very physical.
They don't even realize how much they are enchanted by beauty.
I had a girl similar.
I don't know what it is with the fat redheads.
I've had two fat redheads come on my show and lose 100 pounds.
So you could be next.
You know what I mean?
I'm already 50 pounds down.
And but here's the thing is like, you may say like, oh, you may be overweight and, you know, the cards will change for you.
But the men who are interested in chubby women are very, very interested in chubby women.
And they are not usually chubby themselves.
Like usually the guys that are interested in me are like 60 pounds lighter than me and they just, they, they want something to hold on to.
And when it came down to it, he expressed his interest in ways that I will not disclose.
Right.
But you, but you don't like those guys.
That's what you're saying.
You say you're not happy with the quality of men you're getting because if you were happy with it, you'd be in a relationship.
I'm an exception.
And I don't mean to say I'm special.
I'm not.
I'm just a person, but I have looked and looked and looked, and I have not found anybody that I feel I would be happy with.
But I also have been rejected by people that I've wanted to be happy with.
I just haven't gotten to where I'd like to be.
I really don't know how else to put it.
I genuinely, this guy that I was talking to, I thought that I could do better, but at the same time, I was like, a picture.
I won't put it on stream.
Will you send me a picture?
I just want to rate him one to ten.
I'm not, I'm not going to show it.
You can unsend it right after.
I just want to see what you're doing.
How would I go about that?
On Instagram.
Okay, just let me put a picture on your phone of you guys together or something.
I can drop you for a second, then you can come back up.
She might, she might be.
Let's see.
He was a very skinny guy, tall with curly hair and glasses.
I got to see it.
I don't know if I don't have his Instagram handle.
Again, I'm not used to it.
I would never do that.
Like, that's, oh, you, you don't?
All right.
Well, it's all right.
You can go through.
You can come back.
I'm genuinely trying to find one.
And I think I deleted it because once it's over, it's over.
Yeah, but come on.
We're women.
Women stalk their exes forever.
I wouldn't even consider him an ex.
He was a guy that I spent maybe, I went out with him three times.
Oh, there, I found it.
Yeah, see, I knew.
I know I do have it.
Hold on.
So you hung out with him three times and then what he just said, he that you were.
What did you do that?
Like made him say that?
Like, did you do something over the top?
Or like, what made him say that you just want to?
How old was he?
How old was he?
22, he's 22 okay, because did you receive a mail?
Um, I haven't gotten it yet, but let me refresh.
Oh, you know what so this is my friend Chevy He says it's crazy for me I literally had the gyp hit the gym every day with a trainer, learn game, spend the hours every day studying game Riz, go on a hundred, get dates, get rejected a thousand times to get good with women.
I'm gonna put that on the stream.
Yeah, and she can't lose.
She's got to lose more than 10 to 15 pounds.
She's five nine.
Uh, she should be like 140.
Oh, that guy um, okay facially, and I I will never, I would never share.
Um, I would put his.
He's tall, but a four face.
I would say five four, I would say below average for face, but slightly.
But he's tall in shape.
Um, decent job okay, okay.
So just to give you a little bit from the male experience, my friend Shiv.
He's Indian um, so obviously he's gonna have an even harder time.
You know, these Indian guys have it rough.
It's crazy for me, I literally had to hit the gym every day with a trainer, learn games, spend hours every day studying game and Riz.
I went on a hundred dates and got rejected a thousand plus times to get good with women.
So just to give you a little insight to the male experience, that's pretty normal for like most, probably like 70 of men had to do something like that.
You know, they hear you you, they hear you getting rejected twice.
You know, and they, they don't see you putting any work.
You know they, they see you're super overweight for your age, with like a ring, and they're thinking like you haven't put any time into studying what men want, so like why can you be mad about the results?
That's how men are gonna see it.
I'm not saying it that way, but i'm saying that's why it went so viral, because you're saying you want something, you know, but your actions don't match it.
Yeah, but they also don't know much about me.
I spent three years on and off on Tinder going on dates all the time.
And I've been rejected more than twice.
I go out, like if I see somebody at a restaurant, a waiter, I'll hit on him.
You know, maybe that's not great because they're working, but I'm not afraid.
I'm not afraid to get rejected.
That's not the problem at all.
It was at that time I just had been feeling a certain type of way and it hit harder than it normally would have.
But I do put myself in position of getting rejected.
And usually I don't take it very personally.
I know, but I'm not, I'm not saying the approaching.
Again, the number one thing men look for is beauty, right?
So again, if you can't control your eating, like the way men are going to see it is you kind of deserve what you get, you know, and they're not, it's not, you know, I'm not trying to judge you because I've been overweight.
I get it.
But, you know, I would say that should be your number one priority right now is losing weight.
1,200 calories a day, baby.
I did it.
It's, it's not too bad once you get past the cut.
I usually even eat less than that at this point.
So then some days I don't even eat.
And that's not healthy either.
But I don't.
The thing is, is I don't want to attract the men that you're talking about.
I don't want them.
Well, I would say that's all men.
All men prefer thinner women.
Some men might go for bigger women because they're easier.
So they kind of, the way that a lot of guys see it is bigger women are just easier to get.
So they might not go through the trouble of getting like a super attractive girl.
It's the same thing for me.
I would say I'm pretty average looking.
There's more beautiful women.
Some men might go for a more average looking girl because they view the beautiful women as too hard to get.
It's like too difficult.
But they're always going to prefer the more beautiful and the thinner.
Looks matter.
Looks do matter, but looks aren't everything.
And, you know, I find myself beautiful in a lot of ways.
To women, though.
They don't, they're not everything to women, but they're a lot.
They're probably like 80% to men up front.
You know, it's okay that I'm having such a hard time dating because I am trying to find the exception when it comes to men.
I am not looking for someone who just judges me based off of my appearances because in general, there are a lot of men who say beauty is in the eye of the beholder as well.
The people that are attracted to your page, yes, they guarantee they are looking for just looks, but it's not all men.
There are a lot of men that I've met that don't just include looks.
And there are a lot of men who are attracted to me just exactly the way I am.
Why do you go about it that way?
Because I was in your position.
No, no, so I was in your position.
And instead of like, why argue with me about what men want when you know, you know, deep down on some level that men are more attracted to thin women?
Why not just, you know, say I'm going to lose the weight?
Like, why argue?
Why be combative?
Why not just lose the weight?
And then problem solved.
That's a deep-rooted question.
And I would have to say it's because I've met good men.
I've met good men.
So they're bad if they prefer thinner women.
That's what you're implying.
I've met.
I mean, the guy you went, the guy you went for was tall, right?
I don't think you're bad if you prefer tall men.
You're 5'9, you know.
I prefer tall men.
I do too.
Yeah, so why is it wrong for men to prefer thinner women?
Like, why use the shaming language?
It's because I don't want to, because when you get older, naturally, you do usually gain weight, you usually get wrinkles, you usually get gray hair.
And those are the type of men that'll leave me for someone younger.
I don't want that.
I want somebody who prefers who you are as a person.
No, but what they see it is you're irresponsible and you lack discipline.
Because if you're overweight, you do lack discipline.
You can't stop.
Like, there's no reason you should be that big at your age.
There's no reason.
Like, that, like, do you know how many cat, like 10 pounds is 35,000 calories?
That means for years, you've had to eat in a calorie surplus and do nothing about it to get to that point.
So, and I was in that same position.
So, again, I'm not judging you.
I understand how it happens.
But when it happened to me, I knew that I lacked discipline.
So, men see that as a character flaw, and it is.
I did lack discipline in that category.
And one of the things is, I didn't lack discipline in every facet of my life.
I got my bachelor's degree.
I'm in school.
I have a job.
I make more, I make more money than most men I meet on the dating apps.
Most men I meet on the dating apps live with their moms.
Right.
But most men don't care about that.
That doesn't make you attractive because you make money.
That makes them attractive to us.
And the way they're going to see it is you're probably overpaid.
So, because most women are overpaid for their work because men's jobs are traditionally harder.
So, like, for example, you probably, you probably outearn like a logger.
You probably have a lot of blue-collar men that do way more difficult jobs than you.
I do not get paid nearly as much as blue-collar men.
And you know what?
As a teacher who works-you make more than 45,000, don't you?
Yeah, I know.
So, loggers in Chicago, I'm from Illinois, so they make like 45K.
So, you make more than a logger.
Maybe in Illinois, but not in California.
I know, but what's with the arguing?
Like, what's with that?
You just said you make more money than most men you meet on the dating apps.
Because most men on the meeting on the dating apps don't have much drive.
Okay, that's the thing that I'm trying to like tell you is that I you may see me as overweight, therefore less than, um, or less disciplined, but why can't I not judge men off the same criteria?
I see these men that haven't finished college, that don't have a good job, that are overweight themselves, and then I'm supposed to lose weight for these men.
I don't love those men.
Well, exactly, but those are the men you're going to get when you're fat.
When you're thin, you get way better men.
So, obviously, like, yeah, when you're fat, you get the men with no jobs.
That's true.
Those, those are going to be the men you match with.
I, I, when I was single, I was in California on the data gaps.
Every guy I met, every guy I matched with had a good job and was attractive, but it was, it was when I was thin, you know.
Um, I don't know if most people view teachers as overly ambitious.
I don't mean to be rude, I don't think they see it as a bad profession.
But when people hear ambitious, I don't think that's generally what comes to mind.
I also don't know what goes into it.
Yeah, but the problem is there's more and more people not being able to read now that are graduating high school and the test scores just keep dropping.
Um, you gain rate weight and wrinkles after kids.
90% of our men are very reasonable with fair weight gain and wrinkles on a woman who has multiple kids.
Yeah, because the way guys are going to see it is they kind of factor in like 50 pounds for when you have children.
So if a guy's going to date you now and then you have his kids, he knows you're going to probably gain like 50 pounds.
Yeah.
So that puts you at like close to the 300 mark.
You know, I don't really want that.
I understand.
Go ahead.
No, I understand it's, it's difficult, but um yeah, there's solutions you can do.
So luckily for you, it's all fixable.
I think you have a good face card.
I think you have nice hair.
And yeah, if you just, if you just do 1,200 calories for like six months, baby, you'll be hot.
You'll be hot in six months.
And then you can get some really attractive guys with jobs.
So I'm telling you, I've seen my sister.
She's a similar, she was a similar age and weight to you.
And the quality of men is super crazy different now.
And she's probably just 50 pounds lighter than you.
Yeah, I'm trying to lose more weight, but I'm not trying to lose weight for men.
I'm trying to lose weight for myself.
And that's something that I feel like is really like that's really different maybe between me and you.
I would rather make myself happy and then find people that are attracted to who I am as a person and you know what I do and what I choose my livelihood.
Why would a guy want to be with a selfish woman who won't do anything for him?
I'm not a selfish woman.
I would do anything for the man that I'm in love with, but except lose weight.
That's what you just said.
But I'm just so materialistic.
How is it materialistic to care about health?
Because if you're at the same weight, he's going to have to take care of you when you're old.
Isn't that kind of selfish to expect somebody else to take care of you because you can't stop eating?
It is.
And I'm not sitting here on my ass doing nothing.
I'm losing weight and I'm taking care of myself.
But you have heard the saying that like you can't love other people until you love yourself first.
Like you have to have something to give.
You know what I mean?
Right.
But my only disagreement was, or I guess I just, I don't understand why you wouldn't want to lose weight for a man.
And then you get surprised when men view you as selfish.
If you say stuff like that, that's what it is going to tell men.
Oh, she won't do anything for me.
Like, well, what if you gain weight in marriage and your husband says, hey, could you, could you get on the treadmill, honey?
No, I won't lose weight for a man.
They're like, oh, that's exhausting.
No, thank you.
You know, you can lose weight and be happy that a man is happy for it and be grateful, but it shouldn't be for the man.
Like it should be because when you do something for someone else, you are not validating yourself.
You know what I mean?
Like you're like, if I were to, it's, it's just where it comes from.
It's where it comes from.
Like, of course, I'll lose weight and like, you know, be happy if a man is happy.
And I'll be like, okay, great.
You know, especially like if you're in a relationship already and you lose weight together, that like I would say that's for us, like, especially if you lose weight for a partner.
I just, I don't understand this therapy talk because what it sounds like, what I just keep hearing from you is do things for me to soothe my needs.
Don't care about the other person's needs.
And when I say, when I say men are visual, they care about looks, you say, well, I want to do it for me.
I don't care about him.
And then, you know, why would a guy want to date someone with that attitude?
You know, because when you're in a relationship, a lot of it's being selfless and not thinking about you.
You know, it's about thinking about the other person.
I'm a little bit sad because I feel like you haven't met some of the great, amazing men that I have met that genuinely value women who work on themselves and try to become a whole person.
Because I think it's selfish to date a man to use a man and to use them and to value only the things that they can give you.
What I'm saying is, I want to become the most wholesome person that I can be and then date somebody.
I need you to explain what that means.
Women that work on them.
What does working on yourself look like?
Making sure that you can take care of yourself financially, making sure you can take care of yourself emotionally, making sure that you can put yourself in the position in which you love yourself.
Because if you don't love yourself, then who how can you expect somebody else to love you?
Okay, financially.
So, what you pay your bills?
I do, I pay all of my bills.
I've never been in the position.
I'm saying, like, that's what working on yourself is.
It's so crazy.
Why wouldn't health fall into here?
It does.
I'm working on my health.
Okay.
She is sort of in the area where men's are the roles are reversed, but she wants a man and but wants a woman and she doesn't want to lose the weight, losing weight to be the reason.
New subscriber, Pearl.
Interesting.
All right.
Well, thank you guys.
I just don't really understand the shaming language.
You use a lot of that where you're like subtly shaming men for wanting what they want.
And then you kind of imply, you somehow imply that there's something defective about men if they want thin women.
But I also feel like you're shaming me for being who I am as a person.
Um, because I said you would get more attention if you lost weight.
I would get attention from people that are materialistic.
So then it's a circle.
You keep going back to that.
There's something wrong with the men if they want thin women.
There's something wrong with the men.
I don't think there's something wrong with a man who can be healthy.
I think there's nothing wrong with a man who appreciates a healthy woman, appreciates, but he can't.
Okay, well, is there something wrong with you?
Because you want a tall man, there's something wrong with you.
You're materialistic, but I don't.
You're so materialistic because you chose a tall man.
Do you see how that you would say, what's wrong with you?
See, but I don't only date tall men.
I've dated men that are shorter than me.
Yeah, the gaslighting.
But the last guy you dated was 6'1.
So it's like.
She happened to be 6'1, but the guy after that was 5'8, and I'm 5'9.
Okay, so you went an inch shorter.
What about 5'5?
Why not?
5'4?
I've done that.
Yeah, I didn't prefer it, but I have dated men shorter than me.
And it wasn't well, they don't prefer them.
They don't prefer men, women fatter than them.
So it's look it.
Men will do anything.
Um, so do you want male attention or not?
Choose, choose.
Yeah, men will do anything.
They will.
They will bang anything.
I mean, I've, again, my, my sister was, she was overweight and she got tons of male attention, but it's for short term generally, generally speaking.
They don't want to be seen with you in public.
I, I just can't, I wish I could agree with you, but I can't because I see plenty of women that are overweight that are very happily married.
Very happily married with men that love them for who they are.
Well, I'm sure they're happy.
It doesn't mean their husbands are.
Why do you think that they are?
Why do you think the number one, do you know what the number one consumer of OnlyFans is?
Married men.
Because women gain 20 pounds in the first five years of marriage on average, at least 20 pounds or more.
So like if the men are so happily married, why are they looking at these thin 22-year-old OnlyFans models?
I think those men are weird.
I'm sorry.
Again, you keep, you keep going back to, I don't care what men want, which is fine.
You know, you don't have to care.
You can shame men for wanting what they want, but it doesn't change it.
I just think that like, it's also unfair to men that you're overgeneralizing them.
You're overgeneralizing and saying that all men are like this.
And not all men are like that.
Not all men.
Are you an adult?
Are you an adult person?
Okay.
Do you understand that what a generalization is?
Yes.
And you understand that it doesn't mean every single person.
Yes.
So why argue?
Do you just argue for fun?
Is it?
No, I just have, I intrinsically have a different viewpoint than you because.
Okay.
So if you know that in general, men like thinner women, you know that to be true.
Not every single man, but you know, based on your life experiences that men like thinner women, you're not blind.
You're, you're, you're close to, you're in Hollywood.
You know who they cast in the movies.
You know who's on the big screens.
Why argue this point?
Why not just lose the weight?
You know, why, like, why try to bend reality to what you want it to be instead of just losing the weight?
You can.
You can do it.
I believe in you.
1,200 calories.
We can even come up with a plan together.
I'll help you out.
You know, like, what I think I do agree with you on is like, maybe it would be great.
This is fixable.
You don't have to live like that.
It would be nice to have somebody who's happy for me that I'm healthy, right?
And that's okay, but I don't want to be shamed.
I want to be accepted.
I want to be what I'm hoping is to find the person that loves me at both weights, you know?
And I don't, I don't think that's impossible to find.
And maybe that's not most.
Do you think there's a burden of performance for women in relationships?
What is your burden of performance?
Do you think it's just to be yourself or do you think you have to provide something?
Could you clarify that for me?
Okay, so if a man wants to get into the relationship, he has a burden of performance.
Part of that burden of performance is being attractive to you.
Part of that burning burden.
So it might be being good in bed.
It might be being charming enough to get you in bed or get you wanting to be in a relationship with him.
Like he has to seduce you to some degree.
Then he has the burden of performance, like protecting you, providing if you want a more traditional relationship.
There's roles that men have to do in a relationship in order to be with you.
There's things that you like about men.
What should women offer in a relationship?
Unconditional love and support.
Okay, give me tangibles.
What does that mean?
Like, what do you do weekly, daily?
What does that look like?
What are you doing?
For me or for all women?
We can go with you for now.
Ideally, I would have a job too and provide as well.
So that my partner, I want my partner to be my equal.
That's my dream is to have an equal.
Okay, so half the bills, what else?
Yeah, half the bills to be a mother, you know, to be a mother that takes care of her children and to put just as much work in parenting as the partner would.
And I suppose the kids are emotionally, yeah, of being emotionally available.
Okay, so what is a loving, wholesome person who is an equal?
It's going to be a tough sell, Liliana.
I wish you luck in selling it.
That's a tough sell.
Liliana, yes, all men want thin women.
Pearl is giving you the key to getting what you want and you're not listening.
Stop arguing and listen.
She won't.
I could give her a really good diet plan.
So what you bring is being a wholesome, loving person.
And that's actually not very easy to find, to be honest.
Well, I think I would disagree because otherwise you'd have like a line out the door.
You know what I mean?
I disagree.
Which is fine.
I'm not, you know, I'm just saying if you're going to sell yourself, that's not how I do it.
Cause you're saying like I'll help with the bills.
They don't care.
Especially you want something.
You want men with jobs, right?
You're too, you're big.
You're too used to dating the jobless men.
They're good with the 50-50, but once you get into thin category, you're going to see they're not going to care about 50-50 rent.
I mean, one thing that I can give that not a lot of people can is I'm like, I mean, you said it yourself, like the fact that I'm willing to talk to you, and maybe I don't agree with every point, but I'm willing to hear you out.
And I don't think you're wrong in every aspect.
And I think that maybe, maybe I'll look back on this video and say, wow, Pearl is absolutely 100% right.
But, you know, I'm a person that's learning and I'm willing to learn and I'm willing to talk to you.
And I would in a relationship essentially do the same.
And a lot of women are stubborn.
A lot of women are in the positions where it's like, what can men give me?
What can men give me?
I actually don't think, and I was telling a guy I worked with, I don't think you're fully cooked.
You still have light in your eyes.
Women kind of lose that as they get older.
Yeah.
You still have some light in your eyes, but you got to stop with this arguing over nothing.
That's going to be exhausting.
Like, if I can't make a generalization with you arguing about it, that's going to be exhausting to a guy.
I'm just taking a moment to think about.
It's okay.
You know, I understand.
I'm not, as women, we just want to argue over everything.
You know, okay, shame is a natural emotion and is a good thing.
Grow up and be an adult.
She ate today and she did feed the dog she just kissed.
How many dogs do you have?
Please tell me one.
Just one.
Okay, there's no such thing as a wholesome loving woman.
Those days are gone.
Women want what they want from a man.
If they don't get it, they will leave.
Pearl is looking more attractive than normal.
I think you look better with no makeup.
Not trying to be offensive.
Also, shout out to the coach gang.
We're almost 600 men in here that agree with Pearl.
Why are you arguing?
There is no such thing as unconditional love.
Yeah, what in your life would make you think that there is a, do you think there's a such thing as conditional love?
Or sorry, do you think there is a such thing as unconditional love?
Yes, only because I experienced it for myself.
In the three-year relationship?
Well, who ended it?
They didn't.
Did they say why?
No.
Okay, so you unconditionally loved him and he did.
It wasn't reciprocated.
Yes.
Okay.
Is that, did you gain weight during that period?
Like, was there a fight?
Do you have any idea what ended it?
We both gained weight.
Both of us did.
During the relationship, we both gained weight.
And after the relationship, I lost weight just because I wasn't taking care of myself.
I wasn't eating.
Well, that's good.
Sorry.
Sorry.
That's good.
Not eating.
Okay.
So, but like, so what was the last conversation he had?
Like, what was, what did he say?
We had a lot of conversations even after the breakup.
So it's kind of hard to pinpoint, but I do remember.
I remember this.
He had come over and he always told me, I'm still very attracted to you.
That's not the problem.
I'm still very attracted to you.
And the thing is, is he confused me a lot because he'd always try to kiss me.
He'd always try to do dot dot dot with me.
How old was he?
Were you the same age?
He was two years older than me.
And did he go off to college?
No.
Okay, I hate to, I really still do care about this person.
So I don't want to drag them down, but they did not finish college.
They to this day only have a part-time job and they still live with their parents.
So they, but he was a very attractive person.
I still hold to this day that he's a very attractive person.
Like he had a good face card.
Yeah, 100%.
And he was an athlete when he was in college before he dropped out.
Someone in the chat, would you be genuinely happy with a five foot, 10 inch guy?
He makes 30K a year, is fat himself, balding, and is not funny or charismatic, but is a good guy.
Can you accept him for life?
Probably not.
So there's no such thing as unconditional love.
When you grow to love somebody.
Yeah, but there's conditions that they need to meet to get in the door with you.
Right?
That's a good point.
That's a good point.
And I'm not, look at for me, it's the same.
There's certain conditions my boyfriend had to meet to get in the door.
But, you know, the conditions that men, the standards men have is they want thin women.
Telling you, you're not, how many tattoos do you have?
Only three.
Three?
Are they both chest?
Chest and what else?
So I have a chest tattoo right here.
And I have a back tattoo.
It's like from one point of my back to the other corner.
And then I have a wraparound leg tattoo.
My whole thing with the tattoos was I had, I had never, I had been too afraid to commit to them in the past.
I was afraid that I wouldn't love them when I got older.
But the women that I saw that had tattoos, I thought that they were so beautiful and I considered them art and I wanted to be like them.
So I got tattoos for myself so that I could have that confidence.
I understand, but you understand all of your talking points are back to like what you want, which is fine, but it's just going to indicate you're a selfish person.
You may be or you may not, but everything, you know, because men, when they come in the door, you know, you know, again, there's a prerequisite.
Like imagine if you applied for a job and you wanted to be a lawyer.
And they're like, and they're like, did you go to law school?
And you're like, no, I didn't want to go to law school.
And they're like, and they're like, okay, well, I don't think you want this job.
And they're like, well, I just want the job that likes me for me.
And they're like, are you sure you want to be a lawyer?
Are you sure that's what you want?
And that's just kind of what you sound like.
Cause I'm like, well, did you, why don't you lose the rest of the weight?
And you're like, well, I want to, I want a job that likes me for me.
And I'm like, well, why don't you just lose the weight?
And then really, you're not going to have any problems because you're not an ugly girl.
And then you just keep going, well, I think you're judging me.
And I'm like, no, but I just think the weight, you know, a lot of your problems, you're not too tatted.
I know they'll say whatever in the chat.
Men will accept three tattoos.
That's fine.
They're desperate these days.
You know, you got a bull ring.
That's easy to take out.
You know, there's a lot of things you could do to make yourself like qualified for the job.
But if you take none of those steps, the men are kind of going to scoff at you because they're like, well, she doesn't really want to, she doesn't really want to be in a relationship.
I just feel like when we're talking, if I were applying for a law school job, I'd say, yeah, I went to law school.
I went to therapy.
I did everything that I need to.
I went to school.
I put myself in a position to make a lot of money.
No, no, no.
The equivalent to that is saying, well, I went to medical school.
And they're like, we don't care that you went to, did you go to law school?
And they're like, no, I went to, but I did all this work.
I went to medical school.
And they're like, well, here, this is a law firm.
Well, can we circle back to a point you made?
Yeah, go ahead.
So you indicated that I'm selfish, right?
Or that I, the way that I'm the way that I'm maybe representing myself.
I think that I can be 100%.
I don't think you're absolutely wrong, but I think every person is selfish.
Every person to an extent.
And when they find love, they usually put that to the side, and which is something that I'm willing to do.
I disagree with you completely.
I completely disagree.
No, selfish people don't suddenly become selfless.
That does not happen.
You'll be in for a world of hurt in life if that's what you believe.
Being selfless is a muscle.
The same way, nobody that's good at basketball got there without training.
Being selfless is something you actively have to do.
It does not just come out.
You do not become a different person in a relationship.
If you're selfless with your friends, if you're selfless with your family, if that's the kind of person you actually are, then you'll be that kind of person in a relationship.
I mean, I definitely don't think I'm selfish.
I think I can be, but I don't think I am.
I mean, when it comes to my profession and how I care about the children and how I care about, you know, what their needs are, when it comes to my friendships, I always prioritize my friendships and what they need.
And when it comes to family, I love so deeply and so intensely.
So, I don't think I'm a selfish person.
But when it comes to like working on myself and trying to become a whole person, sometimes you have to take care of your needs because you can't expect somebody else to do that for you.
You have to work on yourself.
That's very, very important.
And, like, we're talking about like, I am working on losing weight.
So, it's not like I'm not completely listening to you because I do think that it would be a good thing for me to be thinner.
No, I think you should drop everything else.
That should be your number one priority right now.
And I'm telling you, because you're going against time because men, men value youth and beauty.
And I wish I did this when I was 18.
I wish that was my number one priority.
Like, why do you think you're overweight?
Do you think it's, are you eating out a lot, high carbs?
Like, what do you, what do you eat in a day?
And please don't say nothing.
You did not get to where you are eating nothing.
There's no.
No, I ate out.
I ate out a lot.
When it came down to it, I was putting school first.
And I put school first for a very, very long time.
And it always became a priority, like, especially working.
So when it came down to it, I'm sorry to reiterate, but I was working 40 hours a week and I had 15 to 17 units.
So I was really, really working hard.
And so feeding myself right, it wasn't the priority.
And so what are you doing now?
Are you eating out still or do you cook?
Mix of both.
Mix of both.
But I like today I ate out.
Today I had butterfish.
Okay.
What's your fish?
Where do you eat out?
Butterfish is what?
Breakfast, lunch, dinner?
Butterfish is like a dinner lunch option.
It's mostly like fish and rice.
Give me the restaurant.
So give me, if you ate breakfast, where would you eat out?
Just tell me it.
I don't eat breakfast.
I usually eat one meal a day and it's dinner.
But you eat one meal a day, butterfish.
Okay.
So is that the restaurant?
Butterfish restaurant.
And that's it.
You don't eat any snacks.
You don't drink coffee?
Yes, I drink coffee.
You drink coffee.
You're not going to be that without some liquid calories.
What do you get from Starbucks?
I don't go to Starbucks.
I go to this place called Dutch Bros.
Okay, what do you get?
I get a chai.
Oh, those are terrible for you.
You got to cut those.
Okay, so let's see.
I want to eat 1,200 calories from Dutch Bros and Butterfish.
What can I eat in a day?
Grok is amazing.
I'm telling you, this changed my life.
What is it?
Grok.
All right, breakfast.
This is what we're going to do.
I'm going to send this to you on Instagram.
You can go on Grok and it'll make a meal plan for you based on the foods you already like.
Here you go.
Eat this every day and you'll be thin.
And we can talk in six months and you can have a body yachty.
Right, Chica?
There you go.
I do hope to be in a better place in six months, especially since I'm just going through a lot.
You need to dump.
You need to drop this therapy stuff.
They're going to make you worse.
I'm telling you.
It's not going to help you.
I'm older than you.
I've seen women go down this therapy pipeline.
They're just going to make you crazy.
It's going to make you way too self-centered.
You're going to overthink all of your emotions.
You're a woman.
You're going to have a bunch of emotions.
And the best way to get over them is to focus on solving your problems and focus on other stuff.
Just wallowing and whatever.
You can't have it that bad.
You're in America.
You're in California, which is a great state.
You said you make good money.
You're young.
You got a good, you're not, you don't have an ugly face.
All you got to do, you're going to lose the weight and everything's going to be better for you.
I hope so.
Everything.
I'm telling you.
I've lived this.
I've done it.
My sister did it too.
So what you got to do is you got to figure out plans.
So every day, what I want you to do.
I want you to download Chat GPT on your phone or Grok.
Okay.
Is Grok a paid subscription?
I don't think so.
But you got to stop approaching men.
You're going to have bad results until you fix this problem.
This should be your number one.
Yeah, for the weekend.
You can approach men in six months when you're hot.
Okay.
So what we're going to do here, chat GPT or Grok, you're going to download it.
Every day, you don't even have to track.
You use talk to text.
Okay.
And every day, this is what I do.
I say, I ate this, this, and this.
Tell me how I could have ate better today.
So I can lose this amount of weight in this amount of months.
I think for you, I think you can lose five pounds a month.
Five.
I've been losing almost 10 pounds a month recently.
If you can do 10, that's great.
Sometimes that's too fast, but if you can do 10, that's great.
It's not every month.
I promise you that.
But it's anywhere from like three to 10 pounds a month is usually for me, what happens.
Yeah, because I actually don't think you're cooked.
I think you can get what you want in dating.
I really do.
I don't think you have a super combative personality.
I think you argue too much, but I don't think you're completely cooked.
You seem a little bit introspective.
But this weight thing, you got to stop arguing about what men want and just become it.
You know, then you're going to apply to law school and they're like, oh, you did go to law school.
You know?
You did.
You seem very qualified for this job.
One thing that, you know, I'd like to like talk about.
Yeah, go ahead.
And this isn't all, this isn't all men, but like I've heard this before, and I do somewhat agree with it, is that men will always put themselves first.
And women are usually the beneficiaries of that.
Like they'll, you know, work, work out, like the good, the good ones, right?
You know, they'll work out, they'll take care of themselves.
They'll have a really good job, you know, and they'll choose, you're right, they'll choose the ones that they think are attractive, right?
But men always are the, are they always, always, always, always put themselves first.
Always.
That is just not true.
That's my experience.
That is just not true at all.
You know, when it comes to a relationship.
If men wanted to in society, they could have us all in cages and be sex slaves because they have the monopoly on force.
They don't do that.
They gave us all these rights.
They said, fine ladies, you want to be men?
Go be men.
Go make money.
I think women did that.
You can walk and oh, yeah.
How would women enforce that?
I just don't think it would have happened unless we fought for ourselves.
Like there was two parts, right?
Like maybe men allowed it, but we also fought for ourselves and it never would have happened.
They would have never graciously given it to us.
We had to fight for it.
Oh, no.
Okay.
If you're going to have a political change, you need enforcement, right?
Sure.
Who has a monopoly on force?
Men or women?
Men.
Okay.
So, women can't do anything without men enforcing it.
There are two parts to that story, though.
Not really, it's pretty simple.
So, you think that men would have just come around and given us rights when it came time?
That would have never happened.
Well, one, the history is a little bit misguided.
Women never didn't have rights, if we're going to be honest about history, but women like to be victims, they always want to see themselves as you know, being taken advantage of or blah, blah, blah.
Um, I would say that women actually have more rights than men now.
Yeah, I would say women, we live we really live in a matriarchy, not a patriarchy.
Can you defend that?
Like, I just like to hear, I would just like to hear.
Okay, so men run the entire infrastructure of society, sure.
So, they do the plumbing, all of the blue-collar jobs, all the hard jobs in society, the phone lines.
They're like 90 plus percent of inventions, everything hard that is done in society.
Women have the easier jobs.
You're a teacher, nothing against teachers, but you just can't convince me that watching kids from eight to three is more difficult than chopping wood.
You just are not going to convince me of this.
Women, I'm not going to try.
Yeah, women are a majority of human resources.
Women, I mean, even me as a podcaster, if all podcasters disappeared tomorrow, society would be fine and running.
Yet, we are still paid the same, close to it, anyways.
I think that's unfair.
I think men are underpaid and women are overpaid, but women are just the CEOs of complaining.
I'm from Chicago, right?
In Chicago, the teachers shut down all the schools for like two weeks, whining and crying about how they weren't paid enough.
Yet, there's men in Alaska on fishing boats where one person dies a week and they don't complain, they don't say they're oppressed when men are literally dying to give us crap.
Where women get these cushy jobs where they're in air-conditioned places, they're in offices, and they're, I think they're overpaid for it, and yet, and then they still call themselves victims or oppressed.
And even historically, it wasn't really what they say on TV and stuff that women had to fight for rights.
Like, for example, they say women didn't have bank accounts, but most men didn't have bank accounts either.
Uh, the society was mostly cash, so things didn't really run on like um or sorry, credit cards, um, things didn't run on credit cards, and people just got married young, um, and men made most of the money they were responsible for the debt.
So, that was why, like, they didn't have it because women didn't have the responsibility that came with it.
Another example is voting.
They say, women, oh, women were so oppressed because they didn't have the right to vote.
Well, the reason they didn't have the right to vote was because it came with being drafted in the war.
But women always say, Oh, I want the good thing, I want to vote, but I don't want to have to go to war.
And that's what we have today, where the men get the vote, but they also have to do the hard things, where women get all the fun and the good things, but they don't have to do the hard things.
So, um, yeah, like I, I, we're kind of brats, actually, like, especially teachers, no offense to you, but you guys complain way too much.
You get three months off of the year, and they there's great.
I mean, I feel striking and they're striking in Chicago and not teaching the kids while men are dying.
You know what I mean?
It just makes, you know, it's like the men, like the men are literally dying to give us crab, and women will say, eh, whatever, but I have to watch kids.
It's like, fuck you.
Like, come on.
I wouldn't say that teaching is an easy job.
But I will say that comparatively.
Like, and I could, and I could show you because there's women that post their day in the lives as teachers.
Like, come on.
You know what?
Here, we're going to, I'm going to show you something.
And you can be honest with me.
Really, you think that your job is as hard.
Share this.
Hold on.
See, I didn't say that.
What I'm trying to say.
I just want to show you because it makes it more real.
Look at this.
I mean, like, where is the men obtaining?
Literally, a guy dies every week.
They fall off the boat and they're dead.
And the teachers are complaining.
Give me a break.
Look at that.
You see what I mean?
I see what you mean.
I just want to argue that I want to say that they do deserve to get paid more, but so do teachers.
Like, I'm not saying that, like, maybe men are underpaid.
I'm not saying you're wrong.
Like, maybe men are underpaid, but when it comes down to it, like I'm over $12,000 in debt to go to school, and I went to school to be a teacher, and I literally had to work an entire year without getting paid, an entire year where I was working eight hours a day and going to school and paying for school.
And I didn't get paid at all.
I didn't get paid at all for an entire year.
Well, then, why would you go into a profession that's not high-paying?
Everybody knows teaching is not a high-paying profession.
It's not, but I'm passionate about it.
Right.
But that's the trade-off.
So women say, I want to do an easy job and get paid a lot.
It's like, okay, now you're being a brat, you know?
Then we say, okay, ladies, go into engineering.
That's the hard job.
Then you can get paid a lot.
And they say, no, I want to do what I'm passionate about.
And I say, well, then take the pay cut.
And I have, you know, which is, which is fine.
But I'm saying, like, you don't get both.
You don't get the easy air conditioning jobs without doing math or, you know, just.
I'm blessed in a lot of ways.
I'm blessed, you know, but that doesn't mean I don't struggle.
I struggle a lot.
And, you know, it's hard because this is one of those jobs that, you know, it takes a lot of work to lesson plan and to prepare and to grade.
And at the same time, I'm in school right now.
So I'm doing, you know, 15 units.
See the complaining.
You see, you're complaining, right?
Right.
And then yet, I'm going to go back to this.
Hold on, hold on.
These guys not complaining.
You see, you're going back to being a complainer.
All these guys are like almost dying and they're not complaining.
And that's men versus women.
Women like you.
I'm sure that if we had a conversation with them, they would complain.
No, they wouldn't.
I actually have had conversations with these kinds of men.
You know, I've interviewed thousands of people at this point.
I have talked to them and they don't complain ever.
Or, okay, let's do another equivalent.
You know, then we got the man running.
The video is heart stopping.
A mother desperately handed running into fire, a burning building.
And yet you say, but the grading, the teaching, but I have to, I have to grade teach.
And, you know, it's not to diminish what you're doing.
Obviously, we need teachers, but it's just not the same, you know?
It's not the same, but you are diminishing what I'm doing.
I'm saying I deserve great pay, but those men deserve more pay than me.
Yes.
Do they deserve more?
I'm actually saying you don't deserve great pay.
I'm saying you deserve what you get.
And if anything, I think that teachers are overpaid because you guys get three months off in the year.
So I'm saying, I'm saying we got to stop telling women you deserve everything.
Sometimes you don't.
I don't think we do tell women that we deserve everything.
And I think you just said you deserve great pay.
And I'm saying you don't deserve great pay.
I deserve better pay for having an education and putting myself because if you just okay, that's again, let's go back to the law firm example.
I deserve this job.
Well, you didn't go to law school.
No, but I really deserve it.
I deserve this job.
Well, no, you deserve what you get.
How is your example accurate when I did go to school to be a teacher?
When I put in five years of my life to study and better myself.
Okay, I'll give you an equivalent.
They say I deserve a lot of money.
And they say you're a public defender.
You could have been a high-end lawyer.
You should have went to the school for the high-end lawyers.
Or in this equivalent, I deserve lawyer pay.
Well, you're a teacher.
Then why didn't you, why didn't you go to the lawyer school?
Well, but I deserve the great pay because I wanted to be passionate about it.
Well, you don't deserve it.
You deserve what you get.
I just, I was thinking about this the other day.
And like, for example, I feel like people in the military deserve to get paid more, but who gets paid more?
Celebrities and athletes, like they get paid an incredible amount that, you know, I well, most fair, to be fair, a few do, but most don't.
I was in female athletics for a long time and I knew a lot of male athletes also.
Most do not make money.
And that's, that's why, though, because like the reason is military, they know if they go in the military, the pay structure is very like, it's a lot more stable.
Right.
Whereas an athlete, they might have a lot of money for two years.
So they're, they're, they take a lower pay because of stability.
I could see what you're saying.
Military should be paid more, but that's the reasoning.
I mean, I've, I've been in my industry, I've seen people go broke, you know, because they're unemployed.
They're famous one.
I'm just talking about, you know, the people, like the people we see on TV, they make thousands, thousands upon thousands upon thousands.
And, you know, even in the hundred thousands.
And I think to myself, you know, their life is cushy compared to some of the people that had to grovel.
But then again, I don't want to diminish them because they worked their entire life to be an athlete and they have a talent and they have a routine and their diets are rigorous.
And so it's like, who am I to tell them that they don't deserve it?
You know what I mean?
It's just like, I don't feel like you should tell me that I don't deserve, you know, good pay when you don't know the struggle that I've been through.
But I am saying I do agree that the people that you're telling me about that risk their lives, yes, of course they should get pay.
I mean, I'm sure they get hazard pay.
No doubt about it.
I'm talking to you, right?
And I have this with a lot of women.
So it's not just you.
Sometimes I feel like I'm talking to kids.
And the reason is because they just say everybody deserves everything.
And, you know, at the end of the day, the market market dictates the results, the need.
You know, if something's really difficult to do, it's paid more.
The reason athletes are paid a lot is because it is pretty difficult to be an athlete and a very small percentage get to that point.
So, when you say, Well, I deserve more and everybody deserves more, it's like, well, that's not pragmatic.
There's only so much money to go around, and the hardest jobs and the smartest jobs are going to get paid more.
Um, occasionally, there's exceptions to this rule, but as adults, we know that exceptions don't make the rule, so we're not going to go back and forth about every exception that exists, right?
We're trying to get to the point, yeah.
Um, the only like the big reason I think that teachers deserve to get paid more is because of the fact that they have to put theirselves themselves through an education and not get paid for the entire year in order to become a teacher, especially since they are literally preparing these individuals to become the future generation of who's going to do things.
I just think it's a it's a very important role.
Maybe it's not as hard.
I'm considering it.
Well, the problem is you guys are doing such a bad job, it's not us.
It's a curriculum.
Well, you can try to, and that's kind of what happens.
Women, whenever we fail at something, we always blame somebody else.
Okay, but if I'm if I'm being handed a curriculum and said, teach this, I can't change that.
Okay, the administrators are mostly female, also, though, not the people that create the curriculum.
Um, so education is primarily female, it's like 90% women or 80% women.
This goes for the principals of the schools who get to pick the curriculum.
This goes for the people behind the scenes.
It's a very female-dominated industry.
So, you know, if the curriculum's bad, then I blame the school.
I went to a private school and it was a mostly male administrators.
And we did a lot better than the public schools.
But, you know, what happens is women go into an industry and they tend to ruin it.
Now, you know, in Chicago, there's kids graduating high school that literally can't read.
They cannot read.
And unfortunately, for teachers, you guys have done such a bad job that your reputation is just terrible.
People do not view teachers in the same way they used to 50 years ago because the kids are coming out super liberal.
They're putting a lot of this trans stuff in books.
People are sick of it.
And the kids, they don't know how to do basic math.
They don't know how to read.
And when this has happened to your friends, people that you know across the board, people, you know, teachers have a reputation now.
I'm not saying it's right or wrong, but it's kind of the reputation that you guys have.
So, and I, and by the way, I could even say my job, podcasters, we have a terrible reputation, and I would say it's deserved.
You know, I, you know, this isn't me trying to come at you because people hate YouTubers and influencers, and I can totally understand why.
I mean, I can like respect.
Yeah, I can understand why.
Teachers, people don't really like teachers because you guys are doing a bad job.
People don't like YouTubers because every other day they're like caught in some criminal activity or doing something shady.
You know, I've been in this industry a minute.
So I mean, like, I definitely respect that.
You know, you probably put a lot of see.
I mean, that's that's something that's interesting is your life, you've put so much time into this, and it was not easy to get to where you are, you know.
But even according to your standards, you'd say your life is cushy, but it, but you shouldn't, you, but you don't deserve to be told that you didn't work hard to get to where you are because you did.
You worked very hard.
Yeah, but I think there's a red pill for women.
A lot of women believe they're in the positions they are.
And we tend to get a big ego.
And I could kind of hear it when you were talking.
You said, oh, these guys aren't getting degrees.
They aren't getting degrees.
But you also said you're in debt, so who's the who's the dumb one?
You know what I mean?
You're the one in debt where they're the ones living at their parents' house with no debt.
You know what I mean?
And yeah, you think you're smarter.
You know, it's kind of funny.
But what happens is there's a point where most of the stuff we're given is just because we're women and we have it way easier than the men.
And I went through this too, where, um, you know, honestly, I'm one of 10 kids and I have five boys, five girls.
So I really saw the gender difference.
My brothers are way smarter than me and they had to work 10 times harder.
And yet, they make more money.
It's not fair.
They provide a more valuable service, but I'm a woman in a niche industry and I somehow pulled this off.
My brother did a bunch of engineering stuff that was very difficult.
I could not have done that.
So it's that I don't think it has anything to do with the fact that you're a woman.
I think it's just the industry.
No, no, it's because I'm a woman.
And I could tell you because there's a guy who's been, he hates me.
And he, I actually think it's kind of rightfully so because he has been in this industry for like 20 years.
And I just came into the industry after like two or three years.
And I like lapped him in followers and views and all this stuff.
He was pissed.
And I understood why he was pissed because he did all this work I didn't do and I was more famous and made more money.
I think it's just because you're so controversial.
You know what I mean?
I mean, oh no, he's controversial.
We're in the same industry.
Like he has similar talking points to me.
He's way smarter.
No, no, no, but you're like, you're a woman that like, you're a woman that like hates women.
Like that's no, I don't hate women.
I hate stupid women and women that don't take accountability for their choices.
So unfortunately, that's most women.
I hate like, I actually, I don't hate you, I'd like to say, but I like what it's very frustrating when, you know, I have to have a 30-minute conversation with you about like, instead of just saying, yeah, men like thin women, maybe I should lose weight.
Like that could be such an easy sentence.
And with a man, I've had fat men on here and I had a very similar conversation.
It's very easy.
I tell them the same thing.
I say, hey, you're fat.
My producer, actually, one of them, he, you know, I said something along the lines of like, you can't really demand anything from women if you're fat, you know, and he started losing weight.
And, and anyway, so this is, but the difference with is when I say things to men, they just say they agree.
They say, they don't say, oh, like, even the man you showed me, he was thin.
That's the crazy thing.
You like thin men.
Like, that's the crazy thing.
Like men, the men, sorry, but when I say this to men, they say, you know what?
I should lose weight.
But when I say this to a woman like you, I have to argue with you for 30 to 45 minutes about that men like what they like.
Yes, there are exceptions, but in general, you're not going to get what you want till you lose weight.
And that's, that's a true statement.
That's actually way, and I'm being way nicer to you than all these body positive women that are going to lie to you 24/7.
All these women hate you.
They really do.
I want actually something better for your life.
All these women, they hate you because they're just going to tell you you're perfect as you are.
All these men, they want to bang you.
So they're not going to be honest that they're, they're leaving you and not calling you back because you're fat.
And that's me being honest.
That's me.
I'm the nice one.
And I get such a bad rap.
I get such a thing.
You know, I told my little sister the same thing when she was a little younger than you.
And she lost 100 pounds and her life has completely changed.
See, I do think that you could be honest, but be kinder, but you wouldn't garner as many views if you did.
And you made me feel I have been nice to you the whole time.
I have been perfectly polite.
I haven't raised my voice.
I haven't yelled at you.
I haven't screamed at you.
I agree.
I agree.
I just, I think that you might not like the reality, but there's podcasters that scream at women.
I don't even raise my voice.
Sure.
I mean, you could say like you could say I'm overweight, but you say fat because that gets more attention, right?
Well, you are fat and that's okay.
Just lose the weight.
You don't have to be.
Like, that's not an insult.
Your obesity at 240.
I mean, this is bad.
And no one's really being honest with you about how bad it is, but 5'9.
And to be honest, nobody, everyone told me I wasn't fat when I was fat.
And I hated them for it later because I'm like, why didn't you just tell me?
My God, 240, 5'9, 240 BMI.
Okay, 35, you have 35.5% body fat.
If you're being honest about your weight, which you're probably not, but let's go with that.
35.5% body fat, which is categorized as obese.
Right.
That's actually class two obese.
So you're not like, there's, there's normal, there's overweight, there's obese, and there's super obese.
Aren't women usually anywhere from like 24 to 28% body fat?
Something like that?
They usually hold a little bit more because of.
No, I mean, they change.
Again, what happens is women make all the spending decisions in society.
So a lot of people are paid from women because women make 80% of consumer buying decisions.
So to put that in perspective, if you're a business, you can either make $8 and lie to women or make $2 and be honest.
So most people are going to pick $8.
So they always change everything to confuse you.
17 to 22%, 21% body fat is where you should be as a woman, especially if you haven't had kids yet.
Did you say 22%?
Yeah, 17 or 17 to 21% body fat.
That's where you should be.
All right.
So let's say 22%.
Let's say 22 or 21.
How much do I need to weigh to be?
And don't believe that stuff that says the BMI chart isn't accurate.
It's pretty accurate.
I've done the scans.
I've gone pretty in depth.
Unless you're like a bodybuilder, it's pretty accurate.
And you're not.
20 body fat.
Because I'm pretty high muscle and it's still pretty accurate for me.
Okay.
So you need to lose 110 pounds.
You should be 130 to 144 pounds.
That's how you need to lose 100 pounds.
I'm going to be honest with you.
I don't think I will ever weigh that.
I will lose weight.
I won't lie to you.
But okay, let me put this in perspective for you.
You're going to have a life of misery.
Wait, but let me let me put this in perspective for you because I'm going to read this really quick and then I'll let you go.
Hey, Pearl, I'm a Marine of 24, 6'1, blonde hair, blue eyes.
I live in Vegas.
Come to Vegas.
We'll get married and have a honeymoon the following morning and then get it annulled.
No, thank you, but I appreciate the offer.
Okay, keep going.
Okay.
So when I was 17, I was a swimmer and a water polo player and I was working out year-round.
So mind you, I wasn't eating very much.
I was swimming two to three hours a day.
I was burning 800 to 1,000 calories a day over winter session.
I did water polo and swim camp at the same time.
So it was four hours a day during summer camp.
I would, I would do swim camp, water polo camp, and lifeguard.
Was working and I working out that much all the time.
I was 170 pounds.
Yeah.
So, again, that's because you're how many calories were you eating a day?
Not very much.
I can promise you that.
It's just not true.
Look, you got it.
No, no, no.
Okay.
So, if I was, so how many hours a day did you work?
Two hours, three workout.
I would say two and a half hours is a fair fair size.
I, when I was, all right, when I was 18, I was working out two and a half hours of, let's just say, cardio of cardio a day.
And swimming is hard.
Swimming is very hard.
He understands.
Swimming.
And I, I weighed 170.
Oh, he definitely left you because you're fat.
I'm not going to lie.
You went from 170 to 280.
Yeah.
No, not during that time.
I went from 170 to 230.
Yeah.
I mean, that's still pretty bad.
And I weighed 170 pounds.
How much was I eating a day at 5'9 to still weigh that much?
Because you said you might be drinking the calories because that was a big problem for me.
I figured out I was fat because I used to drink caramel lattes all the time.
At your weight, I bet you drink two or three chai lattes if you eat one thing for dinner.
I bet you have a sugar drink addiction.
But when I was in high school, that couldn't have been accurate because I didn't have money.
I didn't have a job.
I was 17.
I ate what my parents fed me.
And when it came down to it, it was home-cooked meals.
You're probably eating 3,740 calories a day.
I'm telling you, look, look, if you want to gaslight yourself, it's totally fine.
You were eating too many calories.
If you are overweight, you do not gain weight without eating too many calories.
I would like to send you a picture from when I was in high school and I was 170 pounds and I was not overweight.
I was very thin and I was tall too.
And I had a lot of muscle at the time.
I, that's the thing: is like, I know you would be chopped.
I would say, because I'm all right, 175.9, you're like, that's probably 10 to 20 pounds overweight.
In America now, they tell you, even when like you would be close there, but you'd still be overweight.
I just, that doesn't make any sense to me because I was working out so much and not eating very much at all.
And okay, okay, be fat forever.
I don't care.
I don't care.
Look, you could deny reality.
It's fine.
I don't care.
You can be fat, approach men at the bar and have them not talk to you.
If that's the life you want to live, then live it.
No one's going to stop you.
Live it.
Live it.
Be fat forever.
If that's, yeah, if that's the life you want to live.
But you can fix it.
And if I were you, I wouldn't work out at all.
Literally, you need to be studying nutrition every day after work.
That's what I would tell you to do.
Because I'm telling you, I was the athlete who worked out four hours a day and I was still fat.
And it was because I didn't get a handle on my eating.
Once you fix your eating, like then you don't even need to work out.
But you got it.
You got to know everything you're putting into your mouth.
You need to weigh your food.
It's going to be really annoying, but you just need to do that for three months.
And you'll know so much by the end of the three months, you're going to be able to make better decisions in all situations or stay fat.
I don't care.
I'm trying to help you here.
If anything, I'm way nicer than all these people that cater to you.
I mean, I can agree with like I'm overweight now that I struggle now, but saying a 17-year-old who was working out as much as I was and eating as little as I was.
I mean, I, my family, my family, they definitely struggle with weight.
Like, genetically, they struggle with weight more than most people do.
So, I'm sure that that was a factor as well.
But, um, if you saw they have bad habits again, I come from a family that struggles with weight, and the reason we struggle with weight is because we all have bad habits, we snack, you know, my um, my boyfriend, like he it's weird because he just doesn't snack.
And when we started dating, I'm like, How do you just not snack?
And he's like, My family, we just never snacked.
And I'm like, You just eat meals.
And, anyways, it's it's not, it's literally the reason it's like genetic or whatever, it's because parents pass down bad habits.
I never snack.
I know, I know you're probably thin.
I was fat.
People that snack or drink coffees, it's crazy.
could have guessed chai it's always chai or caramel lattes i just hope that i have if i have any students that see this that that they know that um that the the only thing you can do is be kind And I'm never going to judge my students.
Like, I would never, I would never call my kids fat, I would never do that.
I would, I would advocate, like you said, to work on yourself and be healthy, but I think you're meaner than me because it's people like you that lie that enable the behavior.
I think I'm the nice one, I think you're the mean one because you get to feel like a good person and lie to them.
So, you get to say, Oh, and pat yourself on the back and say, I'm such a nice person.
Because I would never say that, even if it was true.
And I, I get to, I get the pushback.
I, you know, people say I hate women or whatever, but you know, I'm the one being honest.
So, the liar gets all the good person points, and the honest person gets all the bad person points.
Well, be fat forever.
I don't care.
It's not my problem.
I'll help you, though, if you ever want to lose weight.
I still love people, even if they struggle with their weight.
I don't think you do, though, because loving someone is being honest with them, regardless of how it makes them feel.
Do you think when I told my sister, and I could literally play you a voicemail, she left me the other day?
Do you think when I told my sister that she was fat, that she was really happy I did it at the time, she wasn't, she was actually pretty mad at me.
And now, um, no, I'm not gonna play it, but now she sends me voicemails thanking her, saying thank you so much for being honest with me.
No one was honest with me.
You can be honest, but you can also be kind.
Do I yell at you?
I don't raise my voice, yeah, but your words are pretty sharp, you know.
How so?
Am I insulting you?
I think that you're being honest, but I think that you could use kinder words.
And OK, how would how I how would I describe 35 point type two obesity feel like if we were going to I mean, this is why you get so many views.
It's just the way you come across.
But I feel like if I were to talk to somebody, I would be honest, but I would be kind when I was being honest, like just, you know, say, hey, you're overweight, but you know, there are things that you could do about it.
And, you know, I'd love to help you.
But I wouldn't say more.
I just sent you a whole meal plan, lady.
What more do you want?
I know.
But you're saying I'm fat, that I don't deserve the money that I get, that I don't deserve to get more money.
And that if anybody's ever going to like me, I'm going to have to completely change everything about myself.
It's like.
I didn't say it.
No, no, no, no.
But see, here's the thing.
You can't deal with criticism or anything negative.
And this is the problem with women is no one's ever honest.
So when you hear someone that's honest, it seems mean.
I actually, I gave you a lot of compliments during this too.
I said, I said you have a good demeanor.
I said you're not cooked.
I said, I said you have a nice face.
I said, you know, you could live a great life, but you keep choosing obesity, type two.
So it's fine.
If I couldn't take criticism, I wouldn't be.
If I couldn't take criticism, I wouldn't be here, you know.
But I've, I as well have agreed with a lot of things that you've said.
And for the most part, I haven't really, you know, snapped back or anything like that.
You know, I said that I value what you have to say.
I just feel as though.
I do think you're polite, but I don't necessarily think, I just think in life, most women, no one's ever honest with them.
So that's probably the first time you've ever heard you don't deserve more money, where most people will just coddle you and say, oh, you do deserve more.
Teaching is the hardest profession, blah, blah, blah.
Teaching's not the hardest.
No.
No, it's not the hardest, but it's not easy.
It's not easy.
Don't waste your time with working out right now.
I mean, I just wouldn't waste your time.
I would just stick to nutrition.
You can add in working out later.
You know, that's.
I don't really think I have time for the working out at this moment, anyways.
I'm an intern, I'm a student, and I'm a full-time teacher.
There's just so many.
What's your schedule right now?
So it's like seven to when do you get off work?
Okay, so actually it's 8:30 to this is actually really one of the great things about teaching is I work essentially a seven hour day, which is amazing.
So it's 8:30 to 3.25 every day.
And I have class in the evenings.
So I have three classes and then I'm an intern, which means I have three coaches that come in and evaluate me, which means I have to do lesson plans.
I have to prepare.
I think all of these options done.
I don't need to know.
I don't need to know what you're doing.
I just want to know the hours.
So 8:30 to 3, and then what's the second block?
8:33, and then it would be 5:30 to 9.
Okay.
And you do that seven days a week or five?
Like, what's the three?
Five, but the class class is only two days a week.
Okay.
So the second block is only two days a week.
Yes, correct.
Okay.
So that's still three days a week that you get off at three then?
Oh, that's not so bad.
It's not so bad.
It's mostly the mental strain.
Like the actual hours of being a teacher is not so bad.
It's mostly the mental strain of like how much work I have to do off the clock, you know?
Because you're grading, you're lesson planning, but then you're also doing homework.
So it's just, there's so much stuff that's unaccounted that you don't get paid for.
You know what I mean?
Like it's a lot of stuff you do for free, honestly.
In fact, sometimes it's not even free.
Sometimes that's me paying out of pocket for classes for work that I had to do.
That is enough time to work out.
I won't lie to you.
But I don't think you should start with that.
I would just get 10,000 steps.
It'll take you like two hours, but then you don't have to think about it too much.
On your phone, there's a health app.
And it usually will track your steps.
Yeah, so I wouldn't really worry about dating.
I would do that for six months.
10,000 steps, 1,200 calories.
And then you should come back and show us.
You should come back.
Yeah.
I definitely will since I'm working on that anyhow.
So, but I just, I don't understand how you want me to say it.
You know, I think I'm nice.
If you don't think so, it's all right.
Can't win them all.
I don't recommend my fitness pal.
Sorry, guys.
I've used that.
It's too annoying to put everything in.
I like Grok.
Okay.
So you said you want a 50-50 partnership.
Yeah.
Okay.
So you don't mind having 50% of the bills for a lifetime?
No, I don't.
Would it be nice if somebody stepped in and decided to pay for shit?
Awesome.
Okay, but I'm not going to expect that.
You know, like I'm a human being, they're a human being.
I do not mind paying 50% of the bills.
Like, I feel like.
How many kids do you want?
Honestly, anywhere from zero to three.
It just depends.
Depends on what, the guy.
That's part of it.
That's a huge part of it.
But it also depends on just where I am at in life.
Because right now, I'm thinking I don't want any kids.
Like right now, I'm thinking I would rather take things slow, but I also know that there's going to come a time in my life where I will want them.
I just think it's later in life.
I'm just hoping that I have a partner that I see would be a good dad.
And then at that point in time, I'd be like, yeah, I'd be willing to have anywhere from one to three kids.
It's just not now.
I feel too young.
I'd like to wait until I'm like 28 to 30 to have kids.
So what's been your success rate with approaching men?
So if you approach 10 men, how many would you say are interested generally?
Zero.
Zero.
I get rejected often.
Well, I told you how to fix that.
You know.
Okay.
So would you ever propose to a man?
And if so, would you want him to take your last name?
No.
You would not propose to a man.
I would be willing to propose to a man, but I would not be willing to have them take my last name.
Okay.
I think I feel a little too traditional for that.
Okay.
Can you, can you get off my lap?
Google.
Do you want kids?
And are you okay with being, okay, we said the kids.
If you have children, are you okay with being the are you okay with being the breadwinner?
Like, would you ever take the majority of the bills?
If I had a better job, I wouldn't mind, but I don't think my job is enough to support me and three kids and my husband.
I don't, I don't think I make enough for that.
Are you willing to take the bull ring out?
Are you going to keep that in?
It looks like it's out, is it not?
Can't see it's not out.
Um, I like it because I feel like it makes my nose look longer.
That's like a really specific thing.
I think I would be willing to take it out.
Um, it just depends.
Like, right now, I like it, but that doesn't mean I'll like it forever.
I'm willing to take it out at some point in time.
Okay.
Um, and then how have the dating apps been treating you?
Like, how many guys have you met from there that like want to date, or like what's been so?
You had the three-year relationship, and then like, what was after that?
Did you go on dating apps?
Did you meet guys at school?
Did you not meet?
Guys at school, I've met guys at work, um, mostly dating apps, though.
And for the most part, guys on dating apps only want one thing, and you know what that is.
They don't, nobody's on a dating app because they want a serious relationship.
It's not everybody that's on a dating app, everybody that has been on a dating app says that they want a serious relationship, but they have never committed to it.
And that happened when I was thin too.
You were never thin, but um, sorry, but the no there people meet off the dating apps and they want relationships.
That's like every other couple I meet, that's how they met this guy, Shiv, he met his girlfriend on Hinge, which is okay, it just means you're doing something wrong, you know.
Yeah, I suppose so.
I mean, I did meet my three-year relationship on Tinder, which is okay.
So, is it because after they like sleep with you, they stop talking to you?
Is that why you think, or is it because you go on the date and they say they just want something casual?
Like, what makes you think they don't want anything serious?
I'm not judging, I'm just wondering which, like, what you're what actually happens is I don't do really a lot with most men.
Um, I don't, but what happens is like we go out to dinner, and I'm like, you know, what are you looking for if they haven't already told me?
And they usually say, I'm just looking for somebody to spend time with.
I'm just, you know, um, I want basically everything a relationship and titles, but I don't want the actual title of a relationship.
That's what happens pretty much every time.
Okay, so it's because they say that on the first date that the challenge you're going to get is most guys they don't want the pressure.
So, if they say they want a relationship up front and then later they start dating, sorry, they start dating you and they decide they don't like your personality for whatever reason because that happens all the time, right?
A guy starts sleeping with a girl, and maybe in the beginning he wants to date her, but then he gets to know her and he's like, Oh, she's a little crazy, or she's got this, you know, what I and you know, it's the same thing with us, right?
I'm sure you've slept with a guy before where you start hooking up, and maybe you just you didn't want to date him or dating him, what getting to know him for whatever reason you eliminate him.
That happens with men and women.
So, when guys say that up front, um, it's not necessarily that they don't want a relationship, they just don't want the pressure.
Because after you have sex, the burden of performance is on us.
That's when you have to be a likable person.
Yeah, it happens in the beginning.
It's usually, oh, you know, I'm not looking for anything serious right now.
I just want to go on dates and have fun.
That's it.
Dog, it's hurting my leg.
Can you go back seat, please?
Go.
And then do they usually like they just leave after that or what's the like, do you end it or what are we what?
What happens next honestly, after a first date?
Ow dude, you get out of my car go oh, and what?
What age range are you dating?
Um, anywhere from like 22 to like 30, 31.
Would you ever consider going a little older than that or no?
Uh, depends on the person, I guess.
Okay um, there she goes.
I think her phone probably died.
it's all right we are kind of wrapping up anyway what do you guys think I'm not looking for anything serious with you.
yeah i know i know but sometimes guys say that it's not because they're not like open to something serious it's just they don't want they don't want Um oh, there you're back.
Did your phone die?
No, it's my dog.
Um, she's being particularly needy at this moment.
Um, she was my nap knocking my phone over, so I accidentally exited out.
But uh, it depends on the person, because some guys I almost feel weirded out when they like me a little too young.
But then some guys I genuinely feel like they're looking for a connection and I kind of feel it out and see how I feel about it.
It just depends like, especially since like, i've talked to an older guy and he wanted to see pictures of me when I was 18 and I was like that's really weird, that's really really wanted to know.
He's trying to see what you looked like before you got fat.
He's like, does this girl have potential or not?
Can I like, can I, can I fix her?
Okay well, I would expend, extend your range up to a decade um, maybe even 15 years, to be honest, you're gonna be able to shoot a little higher, less attractive women, because when you go for men your age, you're competing with the women your age.
So, like their other choices, or women that your age that look better than you but you're young.
So if you go a little older, you have the youth on your side.
You can get a little bit better looking usually um okay well, that's all my questions I think I got for you.
Thanks for coming um, I sent you your meal plan, so you know.
I think you should come back in six months and just tell me how much better your life is.
Um, is this on a certain platform or is this on?
This is just on youtube live.
It's on twitter live.
You're welcome to pull any clips and put on tick tock, I don't mind.
Okay, thank you, you can just screen record or whatever, download it either or um.
But thanks for coming on um.
If you ever want to come back, let me know.
And sounds good, appreciate it you having you.
Thanks for coming.
All right, i'll see you.
yeah have a nice one you too yeah you know she was cool I didn't really actually do you know what.
I would have her on the um if she, if she, wanted to do it, I would invite her to a weekly show.
I don't know if she would do it, but you remember that show I was trying to do with somebody it was like reoccurring, but the women were just too bitchy.
This was good, maybe life-changing.
I doubt it, but I didn't have to mute her.
I know this was like the first woman I see good qualities in her nice voice, willing to attempt to be reasonable.
Um, yeah, I know, I know, I know she's she's not completely cooked yet.
I can tell when somebody's like cooked, like they're too far gone.
There's no, you know what I mean?
Like, I she's not completely cooked, anyways, guys.
Thanks for watching.
I love you guys.
Um, so please come back.
Uh, tomorrow, I'm not gonna do a show, but I'll probably do a show Tuesday.
Oh no, Tuesday's my birthday.
I forgot women's birthdays, we have to cry.
I don't want to no, not my birthday, no, no, I don't want to get older, You're changing me!
Have a good fight and happy birthday.
Yeah, I'll probably stream on my birthday.
Yeah, you're right.
I'm 22.
I'm totally 22.
i know the wall is staring into my soul it totally is you heard her insult me just after well Well, I kind of passed for 27.
Shut up.
No, I don't.
You know, it's funny.
The other day, I was at a karaoke bar, and someone was like, So, you're what, like 29, 30?
And I was like, Even though I was like two weeks away from 29, I'm like, I've never been so offended in my life.
Why can't you just say 25?
Just lie to me, just lie to me.
You know what I mean?
Like, anyways, anyways, all right, guys.
Um, thanks so much for watching.
Please like the video and subscribe, and I will see you guys next time.