There's a wife-swapping underground of people in RVs.
Adam Curry, John C. Dvorak.
It's Sunday, April 24th, 2011.
Time for your Gitmo Nation Media Assassination Episode 298.
This is No Agenda.
This is No Agenda.
Broadcasting from my deathbed in the Hilltop Watchtower, Crackpot Command Center, Gilmore Nation West, the People's Republic of Southern California.
In the morning, everybody, I'm Barely Adam Curry.
And from northern Silicon Valley, where, if no place else, it's Easter here, I'm John C. Dvorak.
It's Crackpot and Buzzkill.
In the morning.
Dude.
Hey.
Hey.
In the morning, hey, everybody out there, and the foots on the ground, feet in the air, and the ships at sea.
Yeah, play that flute.
Play that slide whistle for me.
It makes me feel great.
I don't know what I have, John, but the people are calling it the 10-day flu, the three-week flu, the you-feel-really-lethargic flu.
What is going on with this, man?
This is what my wife has.
She still has it.
She's had it for almost three weeks.
She says that she's looked it up and done some research, and apparently with some people it lasts 60 days.
No, no, stop.
That's what she said.
Well, how come the CDC didn't issue some kind of vaccine or something to stop this?
Well, I think it caught them off guard.
It's not really, you know, I was, you know, spent, like, you know, when she was in her worst moments.
How long was that, like, after a week, or was that just the beginning, or when was the worst?
Because this feels like the worst.
It actually gets to a plateau, and then about a week after the plateau, then you just have this lethargic problem for about another two weeks.
Oh, please, I can't handle that.
It's not particularly contagious, it seems.
Well, Mickey has it, and she thought she was going to get over it.
She was like, yesterday, she was like, oh yeah, we're all great.
And then last night, she's like, kaboom!
Like a ton of bricks.
First time on this show we have done a Sunday morning service without pancakes.
Oh!
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Right.
Really?
Yeah, I didn't wake her up.
Come on, you've had a moment without pancakes.
No, never a Sunday without pancakes, no.
Well, it probably wouldn't be good for you anyway.
They'd make you congested.
Oh, man.
Yeah, I don't know.
This thing's going around now.
My daughter had a little bit of something, but she actually, I think she took a round of Tamiflu.
So it might be a flu.
She got over it instantly.
She was fine.
I think I got it from one of the guests on the Big App Show.
I think one of the writers who was over here was recovering from something.
The writer?
Stay away from them.
Yeah, really.
Like, hey, let's just bump fists.
I don't want to shake your hand.
Let's just bump fists, man.
I think that was the person who gave it to me.
But this is weird.
It's just like, I mean, I'm sleeping like four hours during the day, and then I sleep all night, and of course I still got up at 5.30 today.
It was rough.
So when did you catch this?
You had it the last show?
Yeah, it started Wednesday.
You were just getting it, I guess, on Saturday.
No, no, no.
It started on Wednesday, John.
Today is Sunday.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm looking at the wrong...
The wrong what?
The day could be...
The way I see it when we're doing a show, it could be Thursday.
The wrong sundial?
Cut the sundial.
Oh, hey, adjust the sundial!
So I don't know what to do about it.
I mean, I'm just medicating myself.
Well, you've had it for like Wednesday, Thursday.
You've had it for like four days and you're whining.
Yeah, it's annoying.
It could be over tomorrow.
I hope so.
My sister's coming from Italy next week with her kids and it's like, ugh.
Well, you know, cough into your sleeve.
Anyway.
It's not that contagious, I don't think.
If you hadn't kissed that guy, it wouldn't have been a problem.
It was a girl.
And I didn't kiss her either.
She's of the lesbian persuasion.
Oh, they're out in contact.
Please.
Don't know.
It's way too late.
No, it didn't work.
Didn't work.
So, anyway, I sent you a note last night and I said, you know, it's going to suck.
I'm going to be light on news.
I'm not going to have anything going on.
And actually, this morning, I don't know how I did it, but apparently there was still enough out there that I think we got a show.
And then you sent in Clipperpalooza.com.
Yeah, you made me work my butt off after I got that memo.
We can play all these clips and the show will be over.
You got a pre-show memo.
It's like, the show is in trouble.
We can't make it.
I'm dying here.
I've got a chest cold.
Well, let's at least start off with, since it is Easter and we want to mention to everybody that we are working on Easter, which would be blasphemy in some countries.
And...
But let's play the Easter clip and celebrate what Easter's really all about.
Yay, indeed.
Meantime, of course, it is Easter and celebrations are taking place all around the Central Coast this weekend.
In Salinas, hundreds of kids got a head start yesterday, but the eggstravaganza event was about more than just hunting for Easter eggs.
The Easter bunny, I think, is going to come soon.
Are you excited?
Uh-huh.
The bunny was the biggest draw for four-year-old Lexi and for the hundreds of other kids at Salinas' Eggstravaganza event Saturday at Natividad Creek Park.
Oh my gosh, wait, what's that big white thing coming over there?
Lots of Easter draw.
Is this the terror bunny?
What is this?
Eggstravaganza.
And by the way, when people listen to this clip, I think that all news should have quotes from four-year-olds.
Yeah, this is great.
Because I think they're funnier.
That's great.
And of course, free Easter egg hunting.
I like coloring and planning Easter.
Easter eggs, huh?
Uh-huh.
It's like just like a challenge and you get to eat the candy out of the eggs and stuff.
But whoever said egg hunting is only for kids doesn't hang out here.
There is an adult Easter egg hunt.
It's $5 to get in.
We call it the massacre because it takes about 25 seconds and every one of those eggs is gone.
How inappropriate is that?
You call it the massacre on Easter?
It gets worse.
Really?
There's money in it, so that's what makes it fun.
I'm excited.
I'm going to do it.
You're never too old.
You're never too old.
Not if it has money in it.
Now, this is more than about egg hunting and having lots of fun.
This is also about familiarizing kids with the Salinas Police Department and also introducing them to the city's one bookmobile, which is actually in jeopardy of being cut because of Salinas' budget problems.
It's an extravaganza.
What a great day.
For the police department.
For the police department.
Let's meet the kids.
Wow.
Okay, let's see what these future juvenile delinquents look like.
That's hilarious.
That was on this morning and I was doing all these clips and I said, oh my god, I gotta get this on the show.
Wow.
But I like the idea of little kids being, you know, when they do these stories about Obama or the budget, they should just go ask four-year-olds what they think.
I was watching a little bit of the Sunday morning talk shows, and everyone's now convinced Donald Trump is a real contender.
And we should ask some four-year-olds about that.
Yeah, this is amazing to me.
No, not to me.
No, I got to tell you something.
Well, you said he's going.
Yeah, I think I got in the book here that you're predicting he's actually going to run.
He's going to run.
Oh, yeah, he's going to run.
His ego cannot allow him not to run now because it's for real.
And you know what?
I'm going to say it again.
You know how the pendulum swings?
We went from Obama, we need like a cowboy type dude, only we need like an elitist cowboy.
We had George W. Bush after Clinton.
It's exactly what we need.
This is how stupid we are here in this country.
Like, yeah, this is a great guy.
You know, he can fire people.
You're fired.
He's like Berlusconi in a way.
You know, he's got the hot chicks everywhere.
And he has beauty pageants.
I mean, the guy's awesome.
And yeah, I think he's an actual contender.
And we'll see.
We'll see.
He could actually run.
I don't think he's running interference anymore.
I think his ego is in the way and he's going to go for it.
Well, I like the theory, because believe me, if I think anything would liven up this country and our show...
Oh, no, it would be perfect for the show.
It would be perfect for the show.
I pray to the Easter Bunny every single day, please let him run, because we need this.
And speaking of praying, let me see, because I mixed your clips up with mine here.
Who is Billy Graham's son, Franklin Graham?
Billy Graham, people have to understand, Billy Graham, a religious leader in the United States of Gitmo Nation, and he's always been very important for presidential candidates, right?
If he endorses you, then that's kind of a big deal, isn't it?
Well, he never does that.
He's never endorsed anybody.
Oh, really?
So that's not the case.
Oh, I thought he endorsed people.
No, he's never endorsed anybody.
But what he does is he is always a spiritual leader that is associated with the presidency because he's always wormed his way into that position.
Oh, okay.
But I don't think you're going to find...
I could be wrong.
Somebody could in the chat room find me a link.
I don't know that he's ever endorsed anybody.
I'm sure if an atheist ran, he would endorse the other guy, but that's never happened.
Except for Obama, but nobody wants to admit that.
Now, Billy Graham, of course, is old now.
He's retired.
I got to see him, by the way.
Was he good?
Here's the deal.
I'm at the University of California.
It's kind of a rabble-rousing place.
They decided to bring Billy Graham To the Greek theater to give a speech.
And so everybody shows up because, oh, come on, let's go see this guy.
It turns out the guy is so talented, he kind of did a very high intellectual level speech talking about the classics and how it relates to everything.
It's unbelievable.
So meanwhile, I was working for the college newspaper, so I got them.
I got to meet him, but when I met his PR guy, he was telling me, isn't this great, this guy's here?
He was very impressive as a speaker, by the way, dynamite.
But the thing I noticed about him the most, which was overlooked by everybody, but still done to this day with a lot of people, he used eye lights.
Which is a trick in television and it's also in public speaking.
You run into it once in a while.
And so what they have off stage about, I don't know, about 25 or 30 feet away, they have, and he's all lit, but they have this special lighting that is extremely targeted to brighten your face up.
And normally it's used to call eye lights in some situations to bring people who have kind of sunken eyes.
Yeah, I have that.
Yeah, they used to have a big problem with MTV lighting me.
If the lighting only comes from above, then I'd look like a zombie.
Yeah, so you use eye lights, which are eye-level lights that go right into the face.
Right.
And so they use eye lights on the guy.
So when you're back in the Greek theater and you're watching this guy, it looks like he's like God.
He's glowing.
He's glowing, yeah, of course.
Yeah, it's beautiful.
Absolutely stunning.
So you're riveted on his image because of the way he's lit.
But then again, he customized the speech for the audience and it was stunning.
There was no complaints afterwards.
It was amazing.
So his son, Franklin, was interviewed by Christiana Anampur.
Anampur.
Yeah, you know, I used to like her, and Mickey, like, loves her to death, but I think she got co-opted, and I think she lost her way somewhere.
I'm not quite sure what happened to her.
Are you still there, John?
Yeah, I'm just waiting.
Yeah, I'm not...
Oh, no, you, like, faded away into the background.
I'm like, did I lose him or what?
No, I'm waiting.
Okay.
Anyway, so she interviewed him and asked him about presidential candidates for the Republicans.
You have traveled to Haiti with Sarah Palin.
Mm-hmm.
Is she the kind of candidate you would like to see run for election?
Would she be your candidate of choice?
I don't think Sarah's going to...
I don't think she likes politics.
I think she likes speaking on the issues, and I agree with many of the issues that she brings up.
But I believe I don't see her as running for president.
If she did, would you support her?
Would she be your candidate?
Who is this again?
It depends on who the other candidate is.
This is Franklin Graham.
Billy Graham's son.
Yeah, he took over.
He took over from...
Hence the whole story about the eye lights.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm sorry.
I'm hearing his voice and I just all of a sudden thought I'm somebody else because I don't remember him sounding like this.
No, it's Franklin, his son.
So that's not a yes?
No, I mean, we're so early, but I mean, I do like so.
Are people in right now?
Would you support Mitt Romney?
Would you support Donald Trump?
I've met Mitt Romney, no question.
He's a very capable person.
He's approving himself.
Donald Trump, when I first saw that he was getting in, I thought, well, this has got to be a joke.
But the more you listen to him, the more you say to yourself, you know, maybe the guy's right.
So he might be your candidate of choice?
Sure.
I thought that was pretty major.
Huh.
Yeah.
Well, I'm going to be happy and disappointed if Trump actually does run because of this prediction that you've made.
Well, why will you be disappointed?
Because I predicted he's not going to run.
It's an ego thing.
No, it's a competitive thing.
Screw the country.
My ego is blown because I lost.
I've missed a lot of things.
Who cares about the country?
Who cares about who runs the country?
It's about our bet, damn it.
It's about the predictions.
It's all about the predictions, nothing else.
Wow.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I think you're getting suckered.
I'm sticking with my old theory.
He's not running under any circumstance.
He can't afford to have his books made public.
I think he can't.
There was another little message that really, and you can interpret this either way.
It's in the magic numbers category.
Donald Trump on the Forbes richest list, number 33.
Well, for one thing, that's funny, and that's a good one.
Yeah, I was like, okay, what are we saying with this?
Is it like, he's in, he's the shill, or it's like, ha ha, wink, wink, nudge, nudge, not really?
Well, that's the problem with our 33 thesis.
We don't really know what the heck it means.
It means something.
We just don't know what it means.
It means something.
Right.
I think by the end of the next couple of years, we'll have it figured out because we'll see so many instances of it.
But...
Well, I don't know.
Maybe.
I mean, maybe.
Okay.
And by the way, I doubt seriously that he's the 33.
If he is actually genuinely the 30...
Most people think he's like borderline bankrupt at any point in his career because he's just such a gambler.
Oh, but these lists are always bullcrap.
I've been on lists like this in the Netherlands.
I'm like, pfft, really?
Yeah, you know, I think, and most of these, listen, I've talked to people about this, and I make a, you know, I've been on editors, an editor, and I've been in these meetings where you make these lists up, and it's generally a bunch of guys sitting around at lunchtime doing it.
But with that Forbes list, they actually try to document the guys best they can, even though there's plenty of billionaires that they don't even know about that aren't on the list at all.
It's bullcrap.
It's really 100% bullcrap.
They really don't know.
They have no idea.
And most people don't even know.
And it's like, you know, what are the parameters?
Do you include real estate?
Usually they go to public records.
Oh, you have this many shares of this company, so therefore that's valued at this.
It's bullcrap, the whole thing.
It doesn't matter.
What about goodwill?
That's always worth something in the books.
Oh, yeah.
Goodwill.
Yeah, you can have billions of goodwill.
Yeah, you, for example, have at least a billion dollars in goodwill.
Yeah, right.
Well, talking about money, let's thank our executive producers for today's show before we get going.
Okay.
And beginning with, don't forget everybody out there, we have two more shows in the 300th show.
One more show and then it's 300.
One more show and then the 300th show.
On the day of the royal wedding, I believe.
Uh, no.
The Royal Wedding is Friday.
Oh, it is?
You know, I saw a poll that only 6% of Americans are interested.
Good!
Yeah, I know.
If anyone really is going to get up at 4 o'clock in the morning on Friday to watch the Royal Wedding, shame on you.
So Geraldo, who seems to be giddy about the royal wedding, literally.
Is he invited?
No.
But he's giddy.
He's like a little girl.
He's just like so focused.
He thinks it's so great.
So he has, I have a clip of this.
So he has, he does a special over the weekend.
It's just basically an old show about it.
And he brings on Robin Lee.
Oh no.
Lifestyles of the rich and famous.
Well, apparently Robin Leach is out, you know all the, you know these, you've been in, you've lived in England, you know there's a huge contingent of people who hate the royal family.
Oh yeah, absolutely.
They're going to protest.
Well, who knew that Robin Leach was one of them?
No, you're kidding me.
Rowan Atkinson.
And interestingly, the Spencer family of Princess Diana will be seated on Kate's family's side of the aisle.
Not on the royal family's side of the aisle.
Robin Leach, welcome.
What do you make of that?
Oh, and of course you forgot Guy Ritchie without Madonna being on that guest list.
Oh, that's right.
No Madonna, right.
No, no.
I'm not surprised that they're on Kate's side.
You know, this whole thing is great theatre, complete with drama.
You know, I wouldn't call it Shakespearean theatre.
I would probably lean towards the word schlock, actually.
I'm not a royal fan, and this is being produced as if it was, you know, the greatest special on earth.
It's a thing that's going to cost the British Empire $5 billion in lost revenue at the same time as it will bring in $600 million in revenue.
Remember, and here's a lesson for the trade unions in Wisconsin.
The British workers get...
Are you ready for this?
Eleven days holiday!
They get this weekend off, because it's Easter, four days.
They take the three days off in the middle, and then they get four days off next weekend for the wedding.
Total, eleven days, fully paid, lost revenue.
Check these numbers.
Five hundred million dollars.
Well, you know, you get what you pay for.
Celebrities...
Don't!
You're raining on my parade!
So Geraldo basically gets rid of him.
He says, I didn't know this guy was such a stiff.
And he brings on a gay guy.
Oh, that's always good for the royal wedding.
So the rest of the show is this gay guy.
But I have the second clip here, which is clip two, which I think pretty much is the direction Geraldo wanted to go.
Hey everybody, Stylist Marcellus Reynolds.
Stylist.
Are you over the Royals or are you into what's going down?
Are you into what's going down?
Hey, hey, Stylist, are you into what's going down?
Oh, I am full on, flat out on to this whole thing.
And you know what?
Yes, they're going to lose money that way, but already Kate is becoming this global style star and she is spurring the economic climate in the UK. She wore a black dress two weeks ago and literally 90% increase in sales in the UK of black dresses.
Wow!
That's just fantastic!
90%?
That means you used to sell 10, now they sell 19.
Who needs jobs when you've got Kate to sell dresses?
Yay.
Who needs to be able to afford education when you've got Kate to sell dresses?
90%.
Yay.
Yay, yay, yay.
My God.
Pathetic.
Why are we even listening to this?
Does it annoy me, make me sicker?
Yeah.
All right.
So let's thank some of our people that are more important than Kate and the wedding and the rest of them.
Kate and Prince Phil.
These are our executive producers, members of the 300 Club.
People should make sure we get on the 300 Club and celebrate our 300th episode, which will be next Sunday.
Dvorak.org slash NA. And give us a hand.
David Dolson, Houston, Texas.
For a show done on the fly, you guys do a really great job, but you guys are pros and we should expect no less.
Okay.
That's what we say.
That's what she said.
Please send my girlfriend some karma.
She's been out of work for some time and could use a pick-me-up.
Are you sure she doesn't want a Kate Middleton dress?
I hear it's all the rage.
By the way, David says the show is awesome.
Awesome.
Well, here you go.
Here's some karma for your girlfriend.
You've got karma.
I mean, if you want, I could just send you a Kate Middleton dress.
If you start a third show per week, could it please be an all international news edition?
Adam and Mickey, please bring your tour through Las Vegas on or shortly after July 4th as Sir Troy and I will be arriving for our holiday on that day.
And she doesn't say this, but she should have said, and I can't imagine doing anything.
I don't want to really be in Las Vegas.
I'd rather be having a beer with you two.
Right.
Keep up the good work, Dame Jess.
That's $300.
And, coincidentally, Troy Walters, Sir Troy Walters, also from Melbourne, the mate of Jessica.
Any chance of a three-minute live show?
That's an interesting idea.
Karma pleased to keep fighting middle management and parking officers.
Oh, well, let's do that.
You've got karma.
I think they had some, like, horrible parking thing, I recall.
I guess there's something going on.
He says I should be pronouncing it.
At Melbourne, I got that part.
I pronounced that correctly, but he says Australia.
Australia.
He just got Australia.
Okay.
Australia?
Did he just say Australia?
And finally, that's what he's got.
Finally, an anonymous donation from Kyoto.
And with no comment, that's $300.
So we have our executive producers for this show.
And I want to thank them all.
And I want to encourage anybody else for the next couple of shows to become executive producer of this show.
And you'll also be the executive producer of Show 300.
Thank you very much.
John, you're just rocking it.
I mean, I don't even have to show up today.
You're on fire, man.
Thank you so much.
I sent you one memo.
I like that.
I like that.
Thank you.
Just a note, on the tour, the No Agenda tour across Gitmo Nation, we still have not decided on the actual transportation, still open to offers for an RV to borrow, but Miss Mickey has now taken over planning of the event.
Oh, yeah.
And she's serious.
She's like maps and all kinds of stuff.
John, do you know that apparently Santa Claus has a house at the so-called North Pole in Alaska?
You're going to go there?
She wants to.
Well, it should be segmented in such a way that you take much of the trip and then make decisions as if you want to continue.
Because I'm telling you, you spend a week or two in an RV and it gets old fast.
I think you're misunderstanding our relationship.
Mickey will enjoy the trip.
I mean, going to see the Grand Canyon, some of the great parts of the Southwest are fantastic.
I think we're going to have a great time.
Well, if as a sightseer, you know, she's got her camera.
She likes to take photos.
She'll have a wonderful time shooting pictures.
Now, what will be great is we'll get to meet all these people who listen to the show.
But I got to say, it's going to be kind of tough coordinating with everybody.
Everyone's like, you got to be here July 24th.
Yeah, I'll see you on the 17th.
He's like, okay, we're going to do our best.
People have to get over that.
Yeah, they will.
The fact is you're going to get there when you get there.
Yeah.
A couple of PR mentions.
Thank you very much for forwarding your favorite domain names to noagendashow.com.
Chris came up with noagendashow.ca.
I'm not quite sure how he did that.
I guess it was available.
And that's cool.
So everyone up there in Canada can get to our domain cheaper.
Because, you know, if it's.ca...
Yes, it saves a nickel.
That's right.
It saves you a nickel.
And I'm not quite sure how happy I am with this, but I have an idea that it will actually get a lot of traffic.
HotMaturePlumpers.com What?
I'm sure there's a lot of...
Is that referring to Ballpark Franks?
Yes, I think so.
I'm sure it gets a lot of Google juice.
As it were, hot, mature.
Sorry about that.
You've got karma.
All right, everybody.
So thank you very much for doing that.
And remember, for all of your support for the show, no matter what your giving level...
As we thank David Dolson, Daniel Foster, Dame Jessica Walters, Sir Troy Walters, and Anonymous from Kyoto for being our executive producers and 300 club members, you get another mention in two shows from now.
Of course, that is an official credit.
You can list your credit now twice, and unlike the phonies in Hollywood, we'll actually vouch for you if someone asks you about it.
Everyone else out there, you have a mission.
It is propagating the formula.
Our formula is this.
We go out...
We hit people in the mouth.
Meal.
Water.
Order.
And say it loud and proud like you mean it.
Shut up!
Hey!
So, um, I did some, uh...
You know, this is pretty amazing for me.
Hillary Clinton is on some kind of trip, boy, I tell you that.
Lucifer, I should say.
So, remember on Thursday's show, I played a clip of her with sweet Mickey Martelli.
Apparently, she's just doing like 20 of these press events a day.
It's one after another.
She's on something.
And, you know, it's in the same room.
She's wearing the same clothes, the same outfit, so it's on the same day.
By the way, she's sporting a honking Rolex.
Which, not only is it weird, because it's totally out of sync with the rest of her lame-ass garb.
You know, she's got the blue on with the big brooch on her left shoulder, the all-seeing eye brooch.
And then there's like a huge Rolex.
It's really weird.
It's very fashionable.
It's like the old school Rolex, like the one that I used to have.
Yeah, President.
Yeah, exactly.
I couldn't see if it had diamonds.
But the men's version, not the women's version, the men's version.
She's wearing a men's version?
Yes.
What?
Yes, I'm telling you.
The big clunky old President gold Rolex?
Yes, with the gold band and everything.
Was she trying to get her biceps up?
Or what's the deal?
I don't know.
But it's noticeable.
Because it's like...
What's that?
Yeah, we know gold's over 1,500, Hillary.
You don't have to put it in my face.
Wow.
Yeah.
So she had a couple of people, a couple of different people, and some people get to say something and others get to do nothing.
Like the guy from somewhere in, I forget, like Uganda or something, didn't get to say anything.
And then she just does a statement.
Of course, I was very interested when the brand new or relatively new Minister of Foreign Affairs from the Netherlands, Gitmo Nation Lowlands, appeared on the scene.
And his name is Uri Rosenthal.
And something very strange, as Hillary kicks off this little press gaggle, as she talks, I don't understand the numbers.
Well, good morning.
Did you hear clump, clump, clump, clump?
Yeah, what's she wearing?
A couple of big blocks of ice?
Big club foot, I don't know.
Or clogs?
Let's listen to that again.
Clunk, clunk, clunk.
It's just scary if that's coming down the hall towards you.
Oh no, Lucifer's coming!
Oh, Hyde!
Well, good morning, and I want to welcome Foreign Minister Rosenthal to the State Department.
It is certainly the case that the Netherlands has been and is a valued ally and trusted friend to the United States.
We talked about our 400 years of history.
Okay.
Our 400 years of history?
What?
How long has the United States been around?
Well, officially since 1776, but 400 years in the 1600s, I guess there was some, I don't know, maybe had some, I don't know.
You caught me off guard.
I don't understand.
And he later retorts me like, yes, our 400 years of, this guy, I took a clip from him, just because you've got to hear the douchebag talk.
By the way, I don't think he gets to write his own material.
I think Hillary says, okay, Uri, here's the deal.
First, you walk beside my jackboots as I clip-clop up to the mic and talk some BS about 400 years.
Where does 400 years come from?
Well, we'll look into it.
Yeah, he confirms that.
So, of course, his only mission there...
It's funny because...
We still have that old clip, that clip of Pat Robertson.
He says, I guess maybe it was 400 years ago, they made the pact with the devil.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, well, of course, that makes sense.
That's what Lucifer was doing there.
That could be it.
She's talking about her pact.
Her pact.
Yeah, okay.
That makes sense.
Got it.
Perfect.
Makes total sense.
The Netherlands has been around much longer than that.
But okay.
East India Company.
I don't know what she's talking about.
So, the main mission, of course, that they were discussing was the horrible death of women and children because they're cooking over open fires.
And the smoke they inhale is killing more women than gunfire.
Whatever.
And, of course, he's there to tell her that both Shell and Phillips will work in a public-private partnership to fix this.
Which is like, yeah, give us some good deals on some stoves, or whatever.
Oh, here it is.
Hold on.
Fort Amsterdam on Manhattan Island, 1614.
Right, but it wasn't really the United States.
No.
It was like the Indians lived here.
She's a New Yorker.
There is no United States.
Okay, New York.
I get it.
I'm sorry.
Yes, our history with New York and the Netherlands.
Okay, Lucifer gotcha.
Anyway, so, of course, this is all about the Netherlands saying, yes, we will kiss your ass, we will send troops to Afghanistan, yes, of course, we'll kiss your ass, we'll do whatever you want, and Libya, we'll kiss your ass, we'll kiss your ass, we'll kiss your ass!
But he doesn't get to say it in his own words, apparently, because there's some words in this, and he can't even pronounce half the words, that a Dutchman would never, ever, ever use, and it's hilarious.
It's just part of the humanitarian tragedy in Libya, a tragedy which is simply unacceptable.
And that is why we are an active partner in the NATO campaign, Unified Protector, and why we also provide humanitarian aid wherever we can.
And we are, with you, particularly concerned at the moment about the situation in Muserata.
We condemn, on our part, Colonel Gaddafi's actions in the strongest of terms.
Colonel Gaddafi and his regime have indeed lost all legitimacy, and he must step down.
The sooner the better.
We rigorously enforce the sanctions against him and his cronies.
Now, let me tell you something.
There's not a single Dutchman in the world who uses the word cronies.
And it's highly inappropriate.
It's not like political language.
So, that says two things to me.
One, of course, and I think you're right.
I mean, his speech would be written for him by our State Department.
He's almost reading it like Haiku Herman.
I mean, it's completely phonetics.
Yeah, so he's reading this thing.
Legitimate, yeah.
But I think what's more interesting is that the State Department would find it useful to use the word cronies.
Cronies, yeah.
So, in other words, cronies is in the lexicon.
For some reason.
I'm not sure why, but it really threw me off.
I'm like, really?
Cronies?
Cronies.
It's a term that writers and columnists use.
I know.
The president.
And Mickey asked and said, what is the exact translation of a crony?
I said, well, it's kind of...
Wait a minute.
Mickey...
Is Dutch?
Yeah.
Yeah, and she never heard the word.
Well, she's heard the word, but, you know, of course, I'm harping on it.
I'm saying, you know, so she said, well, what exactly is it?
I said, well, it's kind of something we use for, like, a thug.
You know, like a...
Stooch.
Yeah, well, like a youth gang who's got his, you know, his jabronis hanging out with him.
Those are cronies.
It's not like guys with tanks.
I don't know.
Anyway, so of course the first question, considering this was all about stoves and women breathing smoke and dying from it, what was the first question about?
Let me think.
You know the answer.
Libya, of course.
No one gives a crap about what they're there for.
It's like, hey, thanks for showing up, Gouda Head, you Dutch guy.
Yeah, 400 years, great.
And then Hillary is like, and she's flashing a Rolex and she's talking to Jill because Jill has asked the question.
Many more Libyans.
The foreign minister was talking about an unacceptable situation right now.
Some of the experts who look at this, and when they look at Miserato, they say the problem really now is that in places like that, it's a ground game.
You can't use air power.
And by the way, something is happening with the elites.
They're starting to slip in different pronunciation of words.
This woman sounds American to me, right?
Yeah?
Okay, well listen to what she does.
To do it, as it was in the beginning of the operation.
So, what can the U.S., what can the allies together...
The allies.
The allies?
I know, I know.
This is weird, isn't it?
This is all milieu stuff, you know.
It's gotta be.
We've talked about this before.
It's gotta be.
You get in a milieu, and then the next thing you know, you're talking like everyone within the milieu, and you're identifiable as a member of the milieu.
I ran into...
Here's an example.
I had to meet with some AMD people to go to dinner.
And so I go to this hotel to meet in the lobby amongst all these people.
I walk in and there's the AMD guy.
I don't know who he is.
I've never seen him before in my life, but I can tell he's an AMD guy.
They are extremely identifiable.
And I mentioned this to him.
He says, I don't understand how that can be.
And I told him that...
I don't understand how that can be.
I was in Brazil and they were giving out awards in some ceremony for all these different computer companies.
They had HP, they had Microsoft, they had Dell, they had AMD and Intel.
And every time the guy went up to get his award, I said, that guy looks like he works for Dell.
That guy looks like he works for Microsoft.
I mean, there's this milieu, the undeniable milieu.
And when you start seeing common language being used and somebody's been brought into that milieu and now they're part of it.
It's a scheme.
Right.
Right, so in the Matrix we would say it's a part of the code, which of course is also highly possible that this is all just a dream.
Go on.
But Hillary has a couple of these words too.
And I guess cronies is now a part of the milieu.
So let's hear this word again.
What can the allies together do?
The allies.
Because they're all hanging out in Paris and Rome and Doha and they're all on the road.
Oh Jill, let me tell you about this.
Turn this around because some people are saying this could go on for a year.
A year.
Well, Jill first, wasn't it?
Your nails look marvelous, Jill.
Actually, what she says is far worse.
It is always a temptation in any conflict to expect there to be a resolution quickly.
I am not a military historian or an expert by any means.
And she's smiling.
I'm not a military historian or an expert by any means.
But the fact is that we've been at this a relatively short period of time.
I know in our...
This extraordinarily fast-paced world of information overload every minute seems to be expanded to an extent unknown in the past because there's so much going on and we're all trying to keep up with it all.
Yeah, say it!
I would remind you that...
The United States and other partners bombed targets in Serbia for 78 days.
Isn't this lovely?
Now she's just come out and said it.
She's comparing Libya to Serbia.
Which was, by the way, another Clinton did that.
Same idea, except, oh, you know, well, it didn't quite work out all that great.
And...
It looked at the end of that as though there had been a success in terms of protecting the Kosovars, but that Milosevic remained in power.
But there had been a dynamic put into motion that eventually led to his being in The Hague.
I have publicly and privately counseled some degree of patience, as difficult as that may be to do in today's world.
We have adopted a mission that the United States, as you know, fully supports to carry out an arms embargo To run a no-fly zone and to protect civilians.
We have done all of that.
And we have destroyed a significant percentage of Gaddafi's air defense system and other assets that he had been using from tanks to his warehouses of materiel.
Materiel!
There it is!
Another word.
Material.
It's material, John.
It's material.
Sorry it took me so long to get to it.
Do the allies have material?
The allies are shipping in material.
We have to start talking like that.
Maybe we can, like, slip into a party.
Yeah, we probably could.
So, of course, I just want to remind everyone what our president said about this.
It is U.S. policy that Gaddafi needs to go.
But let me emphasize that we...
We anticipate this transition to take place in a matter of days and not a matter of weeks.
Yeah, great.
Okay.
Days!
That was March 21st.
It's now been more than a month.
Well, that's days.
It's 30x days, 30 few days.
It's a matter of days, not months.
It's a matter of days in the scheme of things, in the grand scale of things, if we go back to this broad meta-view of history.
Yes, I'm no military expert.
Military.
Military expert.
But when it comes to materiel, the Allies really have it nailed down, Bertie.
This is crazy.
The elites have run amok.
Oh, excuse me.
My arm just dropped off because of my Rolex.
It's so heavy.
Jill, let us go.
Let's get one of these Kate Middleton dresses.
Let's play dress-up.
You know, the way she talks to Jill, there are obviously pals hanging out, and this is just a scripted act.
It's so obvious.
It's so obvious.
All right, Jill.
Hey, throw in, like, an Eli's.
Eli, I'll throw in a materiel, and then we'll play dress-up in our Kate Middleton black dresses.
You want to wear the Rolex tonight, honey?
It's crazy.
It's crazy.
I did hear an interesting theory, by the way, about Libya.
A different one.
Different one than oil.
Now, we know it's not to save...
Oh!
Yeah, we know it's not to save people, because we're killing people.
But we know that.
And by the way, in the infamous words of Colin Powell, when they talk about surgical strikes, head for the bunker.
So, of course, now we're doing surgical strikes with drones.
Nice.
Yeah, no, we can nail a guy right in between those civilians.
Not a problem.
So, yeah, we're killing people to save people, which is wonderful.
Now, of course, there's the oil aspect.
But I hear that apparently, and this is just a theory, John, you may know more about it, you can call BS on it, that Gaddafi was trying to, since 2002, has been trying to pull together something called the Golden Dinar.
And he wanted all of Africa, the entire continent, which I guess encompasses two, three hundred million people at least, to start using a new standard of money called the Golden Dinar.
And then that apparently China was in on it and was minting these things.
And this would kind of explain the reason for the rebels, these crazy rebels who have set up a central bank, that would kind of explain what the real reason is, is that if you have China and the continent of Africa...
Getting off the dollar and going to a version of gold or gold standard, I guess you'd call it, that that, of course, would screw up the entire fractional banking system and would blow it.
It would blow everything up.
I mean, there's no doubt about it.
It would cause great harm, particularly China being in on the game.
And that that was the reason why they had...
Because Gaddafi was getting ready to do it or something or to announce it.
Well, I'm not going to call complete BS, but let me just point out a couple of things about this.
One, especially based on the thesis that we have underlying our show themes.
One, it's always about oil.
Boom, stop.
Okay.
Okay.
Number two, this gold DINAR thing goes way back.
It goes before the dot-com crash.
It's been around for a while.
It's possible that the Chinese have got, you know, because they're involved with that.
I mean, if they were involved with anything regarding this, it would be because they'll do anything for a country to get at their natural resources.
I mean, the Chinese are the worst.
They're kissing up to the worst types of people all throughout Africa just to steal their stuff.
Why don't we go kill them Chinese?
please.
Well, the Chinese don't, you know, we should be able to outthink them.
We don't need to go kill them.
There's too many.
It's impossible.
Everyone who's tried that.
It's like whack-a-mole.
It's like whack-a-mole.
You can't do it.
You can't do it.
Now, but let's get back to the couple of themes that are showing up that relate to what Hillary's up to with this crap.
I've got two clips.
I want to, first of all...
It's obvious that this war is going to drag on.
Now we have a minimum of the time it took to bomb the crap out of Serbia.
We never put boots on the ground there, but there's an impetus to put boots on the ground here.
No, we did put boots on the ground.
We put NATO, UN boots on the ground.
Blue helmets.
Blue helmets, yeah.
Shoot this.
So, here's the first one.
Bleeding hard.
McCain is apparently roaming around Libya.
I know.
This is very irritating.
They need a lot of help.
They need more air support.
The United States has unique capabilities.
We should be restoring that.
They want to be recognized as the French and Italians have recognized them.
I just came from the hospital where I saw a number of people who were badly wounded and dying.
And that puts...
Frankly, it puts a face on it that argues that maybe we should be doing everything we can to help these people, and maybe we're not, and they're dying.
You know, what is up with this guy?
What is he doing there?
The only thing I can think of is it was his turn to go bring the American flags.
What's he doing there is the question.
He's there just to put a face on it.
Normally in one of these things you have a president and you have some renegade senator roaming around doing his own thing, doing his own diplomacy and the president or somebody usually is, or the other party is saying something about it.
Nobody's saying anything about this.
It's all as if he was sent.
Where's the uproar from the Democrat Party?
Why is this guy, who does he think he is?
You know, the Republicans, every time Jimmy Carter, even after he was president, would do anything, they were bitching about it.
But what is he doing?
What's his message?
I mean, it can't just be like, oh, this is...
His message is a bleeding heart message.
He's going over there saying, look, we're not giving these people enough help.
This is all set up.
This is all part of the set up to get the American public to say, well, I guess maybe we should send some troops.
Oh, well, that's clear, yeah.
To get Obama off the hook on that clip, you keep playing and you have to keep playing.
I will keep playing, I promise.
Yeah, you can't.
Which is what nobody else wants to do.
So we'll play that.
Let me do the follow-up on this, which I think is also part of the scheme.
And this is the Fox network, which is also promoting the idea.
So Fox had a...
Had Juan Williams, who is the ex-NPR guy, who they keep trying to make into a...
A celebrity on Fox.
Which is not working, by the way.
It's not happening.
He doesn't have the chops to carry the show.
And he also brings baggage with him.
And when the baggage is revealed, which I think sometimes is good baggage, in the case of this little interview he has with some guy who essentially shouts him down, saying that we've got to put more boots on the ground, it becomes pretty apparent what...
You know, that he's not necessarily buying the training.
Now, what clip is this?
You're going to have to help me because I've been looking while you were talking.
I can't see.
Who are the rebels?
Yeah, who are the rebels?
That's it.
Oh, yes, here we go.
But President Obama's top military guy doesn't inspire much confidence that the good guys are winning.
I'm sorry.
This is Mullen, by the way.
The good guys are winning.
Much more difficult fight, much more difficult targets.
And as I've observed in recent days, essentially it is very much stalemate-like in the vicinity of Ajabi and Brega.
Joining us now from Washington, Fox News strategic analyst, Lieutenant Colonel Ralph Peters, the author of the book, The Officers Club.
Colonel Peters, let me begin by asking you about John McCain's comments.
He says these men are heroes, the rebels.
He's hugging them over there.
He's the highest-ranking U.S. official yet to visit Libya in the midst of this conflict.
It looks to me like he's just hugging them, but I got a nagging thought, Colonel.
Who are these people?
We don't know exactly who these rebels are.
We don't know what they stand for.
Does this worry you?
No, it doesn't worry me in the least.
John McCain is a hero who has stood up for freedom all his life, and he's trying to do the job that our runaway, fraidy-cat president just refuses to do.
As for who the rebels are, one, they're not even sure of themselves yet.
Right.
They don't know.
They just woke up one morning and went, hey, there's a tank.
I found this guy to be abhorrent, this Peterson character.
He is a stooge or somebody.
I don't get the Frady Cat president reference, unless he thinks that Obama's not going to put boots on the ground with everybody demanding it.
But what's happened now, if you follow the European scene, the United Kingdom is sending British boys and girls over there on mentoring missions.
France is sending in specialized consultants.
Everyone's sending over essentially boots on the ground.
They're like, oh no, they're only going to be training and cleaning the latrines and supplying materiel.
They're not going to be doing anything else.
But of course the boots are coming on the ground as we speak.
By the way, do you notice the term itself, boots on the ground, has become extremely popular?
And its reference point is somewhat vague.
I mean, what you really want to say is troops.
That's what it would have been years ago.
They're sending in some troops.
Now they're sending in boots on the ground.
It makes it sound...
Mild.
Well, I think we were using it.
Yeah, we were using it a lot, but I've started to notice it's all over there.
Everyone's using it.
Well, yeah, it's great.
But I think we picked up on the fact that it's a new term that's been creeping up.
It crept up on us.
Well, I'm in agreement with you.
Because when you talk about boots on the ground, you don't immediately have the image of young boys and girls being blown to crap.
It's just boots.
Just some boots walking around.
And that's not like human beings.
It actually dehumanizes what is going on.
I'm very...
I'm sick of this crap.
I'm sick of all these elites with their Rolexes waving around and their materiel and the allies.
Just blow up and dry.
Dry up and blow away and die.
Blow up and drive.
Blow up and drive.
This is our new slogan.
No agenda.
Blow up and drive.
We don't know what it means, but you better do it.
Well, I have one slave clip here you might want to play, which I think was, it was a behind the scenes, I think this is one of those recordings, those surreptitious recordings.
Of Obama?
No, the slaves make bricks.
Just play this, and I think it's from...
A star proclaims his birth.
Then let the Hebrews die.
Slaves are wealth, Commander.
The more slaves we have, the more bricks we make.
I would still see fewer bricks made and fewer Hebrews in Goshen.
It is our eastern gate.
The hell?
What is this, John?
Is that from, like, Spartacus?
What is that?
It's from the Ten Commandments.
As soon as I heard it, I said, I slip it in.
So you're not buying that that was a backroom deal?
Okay, go on.
What was a backroom deal?
That clip was not a real clip.
Yeah.
Really?
You think?
Anyway, so, of course, there's so much going on in Syria.
Syria, of course, is next on the list.
We now, you know, as discussed and predicted ad nauseum on this program, the president actually has come out and said, we strongly oppose the Syrian government's treatment of its citizens.
We continue to oppose its continued destabilizing behavior more generally, including support for terrorism and terrorist groups.
Terror, terror, terror, terror.
Squirrel!
The United States will continue to stand up for democracy.
So it's the same script.
They couldn't even rewrite it.
It's just like, take this piece of paper, read this one.
It's like one of those guys who start a business and they get the formula down.
They never change their model because it worked.
Yeah, from LegalZoom.com.
I mean, there's the two of us moaning and groaning about the script.
Right, from LegalZoom.
That's where they got this.
From LegalZoom.
It's LegalZoom.com.
Hey, we want to invade Syria next.
Let me see.
Click, click, click.
Oh, yeah.
LegalZoom has the docs.
Here we go.
I mean, obviously, Hillary brought the Serbia playbook into the scene.
And, of course, she had to mention it.
So now we all know.
Yeah, exactly.
Take credit in some offbeat way.
She had to, yeah.
Remember when Bill and I, which was really me, of course, because I called the shots.
She should have followed it up with, well, this is the same playbook we're using now.
Our playbook.
Ours.
The Clintons.
The Billy Boy and Hilly Lucifer playbook.
Anyway, so the British Foreign Office is strongly urging Britain's leave Syria unless they have a pressing need to remain there.
So, strongly advising Britain's leave because of the rapid deterioration in law and order.
Social media accounts of protests in Syria.
So the Twitter techno experts are firing everything up.
Twitter's got the Syrian spam bots now.
It's exactly the same thing.
Now, there are some other places.
Indonesia is interesting.
Indonesia also has tons of oil, don't they?
They've got to have something there.
Yeah, no, they do.
Indonesia's got lots of natural resources.
They got lumber, they got oil, they got coffee.
Yeah, so I think that they got real lucky because there was a bomb plot, a terrorist bomb plot, which was meant to get the world's attention as a cameraman tried to bring in a bomb.
To blow up the whole kit and caboodle during, here it comes, a Justin Bieber concert.
And I'm like, well, first of all, let's listen to the Biebs.
What up to all my fans in Indonesia.
You guys are awesome.
Thank you for all the support.
And I would love to see you soon.
Tarima Kasi.
Yeah.
Tarima Kasi.
What does that mean?
It probably means, like, blow me in Indonesian.
Okay.
So they threatened they were going to blow up the Bieber concert.
This is like sinking to new lows for terrorism.
It's actually, it's pretty good because, you know, that's like our biggest export.
It's not even ours, it's Canadian's.
But it's our biggest export is the Beeb.
You know, if you want to hurt America financially, I mean, the World Trade Center is nothing compared to Bieber.
But averted, averted, luckily.
But I have a feeling Indonesia's on the list for some kind of false flag terror stuff happening.
Uganda, US Air Force and Uganda are now doing joint military exercises.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Okay, let me make a no to that one.
It's called Atlas Drop 201.
Atlas Drop?
Yeah.
Atlas Shrug?
I don't know.
I don't make it up.
Atlas Drop 201.
Yeah.
Commitment between the two governments to work towards a stronger collaboration.
Why?
Why?
We have no jobs.
Yeah, for the pipeline.
We have no jobs.
We've got people starving in America.
What is wrong with you?
What is wrong with you people?
I really, I need to know what is wrong.
It's just, it's bad.
I still haven't seen the Atlas Shrugged movie.
No!
By Ayn Rand.
I really want to.
I hear it's like the epitome of exactly the opposite.
Why don't you go see it?
Yeah, because I'm sick.
I can't even get myself out of the house.
My daughter came over yesterday with a friend.
My dad's badass.
She wanted me to impress him.
I don't know if I did the job.
Call the PR people and get a screener.
A screener?
For what?
For my daughter's friends?
No, for you.
No.
All aboard, trains good, planes bad.
Woo-hoo!
That's some pretty good train news.
First of all, National Train Day is May 5th at 8 p.m.
Yeah, and it ends at 8.30.
Yeah, it's 8.15 actually.
But you can get in on a great little opportunity.
Join Amtrak with the Rockin' Railway concert featuring Grammy winner Gladys Knight.
Of course, you know her from the Midnight Train to Georgia.
Woo, woo.
These guys, man, who makes this shit up?
Like, hey man, is that the best they can do?
I'm telling you, it's like we need a promotion.
We need a promotion for National Train Day.
Why don't they get to Hell's Angels and do a discussion on how to pull a train?
NationalTrainDay.com, our National Train Day spokesman.
We're excited to announce seven-time Grammy winner Gladys Knight, who will be doing the National Train Day Rockin' the Railway concert.
Woo-woo.
With the midnight train to Georgia.
Woo-hoo-hoo!
You should add a little clip there.
But, I mean, you can just see the meeting, can't you?
Like, alright, we gotta come up.
Everybody loves Gladys Knight.
The Empress of Seoul.
Are we going to have the pips too?
Well, we can't find all the pips.
We've got a pip.
We've got one pip coming.
Gladest night in the pip.
Now, interesting news from Gitmo Nation's Shezong Wu.
This comes to us from the Washington Post.
I wonder if anyone's going to actually propagate this little ditty.
So Liu Zijun...
Hold on a second, I got all kinds of pop-ups and roll-downs and fly-overs.
God, the internet is ruined.
Liu Zijun was one of the most influential people in China.
The Minister of Railways, Liu Zijun, ran China's $300 billion high-speed rail project.
And this, of course, is what everyone is pointing towards.
Like, look what they've got!
They're going so fast!
It's fantastic!
Well, on February 25th, and this news is just reaching us now because it takes a long time for the pigeon to fly from China to America...
He was fired for severe violations of discipline, which apparently is Chinese code for embezzling money.
Apparently, the Ministry of Railways has run up a $271 billion debt.
Wow.
That's an American-style debt.
Exactly.
Ticket sales are now unable to cover the servicing the debt, which is $27.7 billion per year in 2011 alone.
But wait a minute, Adam.
Wasn't the Chinese high-speed rail the model of all things great?
Why, yes it is!
Yes it is!
Because what we should be doing is trying, because those Chinese are so advanced, they're so much far ahead of us in all sorts of ways, that we should try to catch up with our high-speed rail that no one will go on.
So, not only is it financially not viable, but they also have had to reduce the train's speeds by 30 miles an hour to improve safety.
Hello?
Improved safety.
That doesn't sound good.
So what are they, flying off the rails or something?
I don't know.
Can you imagine one of those things doing 200 miles an hour flying off the rail?
What a mess.
There's actually a video here.
What is that?
Oh, that may not be able to play.
It's like a screen tour or whatever.
Who cares?
Um...
So, yeah.
So, I wonder if anyone's going to pick up on this little ditty that apparently...
Oh, forget it.
It's no chance.
I mean, this is the model that everyone keeps talking about.
It keeps being brought up as the Chinese are kicking our ass because, you know, their trains go fast and everyone's using them.
But it cost them $300 billion.
They borrowed $271 billion, which is, in fact, the plan that we have.
Yeah, we have the same basic plan.
It's exactly the same plan.
And so what you're saying is ticket sales aren't even paying the debt service, yet alone paying the debt.
Which means that's the interest, like on the credit card.
Yeah, the interest.
You can't even make enough money to pay the interest on this turkey.
Right.
So it's just not a good idea, I guess.
It's not a good idea.
I think it's all we've been claiming since this whole thing cropped up.
I just wanted to check and make sure that I was right.
It's not like a good idea, right?
Is that basically it, John?
It's an Obama idea.
It's a scam.
Yeah.
It's just, and I'm like, reading this, I'm like, how come no one's talking about this?
Yeah, where's Michael Moore?
This is a huge scoop.
Where's Michael Moore going on and on about how you can take a high-speed train from New York to Los Angeles and get there in 12 hours?
It's like a huge scoop.
It's like, you know, this is the story of the century.
Like, the whole idea is bogus.
And they'll probably get hung.
Yeah.
Oh, well.
Hey!
Lots of biodiversity news, John.
I'm real happy about it.
We got tons of good stuff.
Of course, we had Earth Day.
Earth Day!
Oh, yeah, we did.
Did you celebrate Earth Day?
I did.
I actually, I did.
I took a crap in the morning.
You fertilized the Earth, yes?
And I ate salad.
Nice.
Very nice.
Well, if you were working on CNN, like T.J. Holmes...
You would confess your eco-sins.
Because when you confess your eco-sins, then it's okay.
I'd like to confess my sins.
I drive a Chevy Tahoe.
It gets 15 miles to the gallon in the city.
While some people have SUVs to hold their large families around, it's just me driving by myself to work every day.
I have a number of TVs in my house, and I leave them on just about all day every day.
Bad bar.
I buy 24 packs of bottled water at a time, and I throw those bottles away without recycling.
Tomorrow is Earth Day.
It often goes ignored by many of us, including me.
Not going to ignore it this year.
Why?
Well, maybe it was an awakening.
Maybe I was scolded recently by an environmentalist.
Maybe I'm tired of wasting my own money.
Whatever my reasons, whatever yours.
Happy Earth Day.
Brooke, I just confessed to you on National Theory.
Wow.
He's just showing off he drives a Tahoe.
Yeah.
I drive a Tahoe, and I get no gas, but I'll screw you!
I think he should euthanize himself and rid the Earth of some carbon emissions.
There you go.
Now, the EPA, and this is really, really bad.
I mean, not only is it bad just because of the message that's bad, but the song is bad.
So for Earth Day, I should actually read you the propaganda It's called click it, flip it, turn the handle to the right.
Turn off the water, twist the handle real tight.
This is the song about climate change available for download from the EPA's website.
The EPA suggests we should blast the song out during our Earth Day celebrations because if this won't save the planet, nothing will.
Well, John, I've never heard such a horrible song in my life.
Just listen to this.
Click it.
Turn the handle to the right.
Turn off the water.
Twist the handle real tight.
Slip on your sneakers and lace them up tight.
Leave the car park.
You know now that's all right.
Public transportation is the way to go.
Well, it's one of the ways to keep emissions low.
I mean, really?
I love this song.
Keep going.
Really?
I mean, have they ever listened to the radio?
I'm doing the boogaloo, as it is.
Have they ever listened to what the kids are actually listening to?
This is the best they could come up with?
I mean, besides the fact that somewhere down the line here, it's like, oh my god, it just, it made me sick to my stomach.
It was really so bad.
The USA is where we are to kick a new trend and to raise the bar.
The climate is changing, and that's a fact.
Bears don't know when to take a nap.
Like, really?
On top of that, it won't be cool when the floodwaters rise and the mosquitoes rule.
Oh, did I lose you?
Oh, shoot.
In the middle of my rap, too.
That sucks.
Hey, just because I liked the song, you didn't have to hang up on me.
They actually broke the internet.
That's crazy, man.
Yeah, not allowed to make fun of the EPA's awesome rap.
It's so dynamite.
A fair dollar is going to the EPA for that crap.
It's really...
I mean, besides the fact that...
Let's just turn it to the right crap.
You know, because of global warming, we have all these freezings going on.
You've got to keep that water slightly dripping, especially the faucets outside.
Your pipes will freeze, yeah.
Yeah, you don't want to tighten it up.
No, but I love when there's, I don't know if you heard that, the climate is changing, that's a fact.
Bears don't know.
I missed that.
Yeah, yeah, so the USA's...
The climate is changing and that's a fact.
Bears don't know when to take a nap.
On top of that, it won't be cool when the floodwaters rise and mosquitoes rule.
I mean, this is what we're teaching our kids?
This is a piece of propagandistic garbage.
But it's not even good propaganda.
Yeah, if you're going to do it, do it right.
Do it right, yeah.
I mean, it's one thing to pump stuff into our kids that is questionable at best.
But, you know, get Beyonce or something, or Jay-Z. Those guys are assimilated.
They'll do it.
Whoever this guy is, he's horrible.
According to the Washington Times, the song was recorded by Ted Coopwood of the EPA's Office of Children Health Programs, who has written...
Oh, he's one of the wannabes that actually works for the government.
Yeah, let's Google this guy.
You know, I could do it.
He's probably white.
He's white.
I was going to be a musician, and I can play the guitar.
I bet you the guy's whiter than white.
I'm Googling him right now.
Ted.
What's his name again?
Ted Coopwood, who has written a number of raps intended to galvanize kids to take an interest in the environment.
Wow.
That's just coming out and saying it, right?
Theodore Ted Coopwood III. That can't be him.
Don't tell me that's him.
He's buddies with Goolsby.
Don't tell me that's him.
No, this is too funny.
Wait a minute.
You have a picture of him?
I'm looking now.
Tedcoopwood.com.
Oh, he's black.
The third?
Yeah, certified personal trainer, certified performance nutritionist.
Performance nutritionist?
Wink, wink.
Certified facilitator, motivational speaker.
Wow.
Certified.
Why does he have to be certified to be all these things?
I know people that are motivational speakers, but I don't know that many are certified.
I'm a certified motivational speaker.
That makes me better.
But how about a certified performance nutritionist?
What is up with that?
Who's certifying this?
Yeah, but what is performance nutrition?
It's like, I'm going to stand on my head and I'm going to eat the beans.
I don't understand.
No, so you get a milkshake that's blended for you and you're wired out of your butt for about three days.
This can't be the guy.
This can't be the guy.
Let me see.
Get cooped.
No, this is him.
This is him.
Get cooped.
Coop with audiophiles.
Oh my gosh.
This guy is amazing.
Oh, he's making bank on this.
Oh, he's got products.
Let's see.
Give me his name again.
Just go to getcooped.com.
G-E-T-C-O-O-P-E-D. What we do.
Get ready to be inspired.
Each keynote presentation and workshop takes you on a journey of real life stories.
Oh my God.
Coopwood Audio Files.
Let's get cooped.
I'm ready to get cooped, John.
Are you ready to get cooped?
He looks like a goofball.
Yeah.
It's time to get cooped.
Hi, I am Ted Coopwood, president and founder of Coopwood Enterprises.
And I want to welcome you to Get Coop.
Get Coop is transforming youth from never ready to ever ready living.
Get Coop is not a concept or a movement.
It is a promise and commitment to transform lifestyle.
This guy made bank on this piece of crap.
You know he did.
He kept paying big dough.
Ugh.
It's another scam.
It's like those $8 million websites we've talked about.
Totally.
Well, we need to get in on this action.
We should.
I don't know what we're even doing this show for.
We should be working for the government.
That's where the money is.
That's totally where the money is.
I'm going to show myself the world by donating to No Agenda.
Imagine all the people who could do that.
Oh, yeah, that'd be fab.
Yeah, on No Agenda in the morning.
I just want to say before we get started there, John, I did a little bit of research on our national treasurer.
And NPR has finally released the list of 2009 corporate sponsors who love the halo effect of NPR. And the list is just, you know, it's like, it's unbelievable.
Yeah, so who's who of creepy companies?
Wasn't the whole idea of sponsoring public radio was, you know, like it's for foundations and big companies that have like, you know, like a special fund.
It's not really for advertising, is it?
It never was originally, but it slowly evolved into that when they noticed that the public didn't give a crap.
So let's just take a look at what we've got.
We've got ABC Entertainment, which is logical because they're co-opted by the government.
American Express Company, they've been sponsors for a long time, but then it Why would ABC, if I was a shareholder at ABC, I'd be concerned.
In other words, ABC, a public company, a part of Disney, a public company is giving money to essentially its competition so they can make less money for the shareholders.
Does that make any sense to anybody out there who's a shareholder in Disney?
Does it?
Well, they're, of course, they're good corporate governance.
But they're also promoting their fall lineup.
That's what it's all about.
Angie's List is a sponsor.
As is Anheuser-Busch, The Beer People, Apple Computers, Audible.com.
I love this.
This is such a great list.
And they have a code.
Yeah, they do.
Carfax, Cargill.
Well, Cargill is a big company, but Carfax is kind of weird.
Then we have all of the financials.
CNN sponsors them.
C-SPAN, which I don't understand at all.
How can C-SPAN... I mean, this is...
Public money floating around in the pool.
Money comes from the cable companies to make C-SPAN. So C-SPAN obviously had some left over.
Yeah, because they're doing such a fine job on production.
HBO. Let's see.
IDP Films.
iShares, which are the gold guys, right?
They sell gold and silver.
Lenovo laptops.
Lionsgate, because you've got to promote the movies, you know.
Mini USA. Microsoft Corporation.
Miramax Films.
Monster Worldwide.
Music Box Films.
Netflix.
It's just interesting to see all these companies who just really want to support public radio.
They don't want to advertise or anything.
Not at all.
REI, really?
I'm going to give up my...
I don't want to be a shareholder anymore if those guys are sponsoring.
Starwood Hotels and Resorts.
It's just great.
VH1. Fantastic.
Volkswagen.
Yahoo.
Warner Brothers Pictures.
Warner Music Group.
Take a look at this list.
Toyota Motor Corporation.
These are corporate donors.
It's all advertising, people.
Believe it.
And now they're on board with the bandwagon now.
So, of course, the pledge drives are taking place as we speak.
Yeah, because they want to, after soaking these, or getting these advertisers on board, and also we don't even mention the foundations, these huge foundations which cough up all this money.
So now they're taking it to the next step and seeing how stupid the public is to give them even more money out of their own pockets, which they can't afford.
Well, they have a new plan now.
So if you don't want to hear the pledge drives, which of course are extremely annoying, because it's like a whole hour, right?
It's not like, hey, give us some money like we do for five or ten minutes.
Yeah, just hours and hours.
If you pay $45, then you get an internet stream without the pledge drive.
That's their new...
They think that's the...
That's like the saxophone player in the subway.
If you give money, he stops playing.
Yeah, really.
Well, we don't like that model, and we don't like corporate money, and we don't want to take money from...
And by the way, let's say the one important thing.
Besides taking corporate money, then asking for people's donations, which I think is abhorrent.
I used the word twice today.
These people are sold out to these companies.
That is what always happens.
You cannot do the bidding.
You're the product.
It's like you're sold to the corporate entities and you're actually sold out because there's no way that they're going to do investigative work on any of those big donors.
And, you know, it's just like regular television with a lot of promotion for movies and junk.
I think what you're trying to say is the definition of commercial is when the audience is the product towards advertisers, sponsors, whatever you want to call them.
And when the actual programming is the product, like on this show, then it's non-commercial.
Because we're not selling you, the audience.
You're not being sold.
We're not taking the audience, packaging the audience, and saying, hey, look at this audience that we've got here.
They're just what you want to sell your crap to.
That's right.
They're smart.
They're smart, and they're first, they're, what do you call them?
Early adopters.
Early adopters.
We can sell some phones to them.
It's audible.
Let's thank a few of the smart money out there.
Stan Salisbury, Gainesville, Florida.
Dear John and Adam, I want to acknowledge and congratulate you guys for a show 300 coming up by adding to my previous donations to bring my total up to 300.
Stan Salisbury, Gainesville, Florida, $126.80.
We also have an anonymous donor in Rydia, Saudi Arabia.
I think it's Riyadh.
Riyadh.
Why am I saying Rydia?
Well, because it's part of the milieu that you're in.
I used to always think that when I was a kid, I could never associate the word chaos with the word as it's spelled chaus.
Really?
It took me years.
I think I was in college before I realized, wait a minute, this is the same word!
It's the milieu, John, that you're from.
Hi, John and Adam.
Thank you for your amazing podcast.
And here is a 111 donation for the two of you.
Today, Easter Sunday, is my wife's Carrie's 111th birthday.
No, wait, I'm sorry.
111 minus her birth year birthday.
So happy, happy birthday to her.
Yeah, she's on the list.
Totally okay if Adam sings.
Yay!
She's a big fan of No Agenda and listens to the podcast while running and training for her next marathons.
What's another group of people that we have as an audience?
Runners, yeah.
Lots of runners.
People who work out.
Lots of greetings from Gitmo Village Cow Poop.
Which is meant in a very loving way as Market Schwab in Germany is really a great place.
And you always know when it is going to rain soon by the smell in the air.
Oh, because of the cow poop.
That's interesting.
Stefan.
He says he's in Independence, Missouri.
It's local lore.
What's that stench?
It's going to rain!
It's going to rain!
Grebulon from Tustin, California.
Another $111.
Just $111.
Call me Grebulon!
Call me Grebulon!
I have a birthday on Tuesday, so I went and did the math.
Surprisingly, it turns out that my age, 42, plus the year I was born in, 69, is 111.
Silence!
Silence!
This leaves me no choice but to donate.
A month ago I started a new job to which I go to by train.
Trains in Israel have become a bit...
He's in Tustin, California.
Israel is...
I don't know.
He's in Israel.
He says they've become a bit dangerous and I was already involved in a train crash.
He's got a photo.
I'd appreciate some karma so he doesn't get killed.
Wait, we'll do the karma first.
Hold on.
You've got karma.
And he'd also like to send a douchebag call out to his wife, Maya.
Douchebags!
She's giving me a hard time because I'm spending her money on you guys.
This is not a good plan.
You're doing a wonderful job.
Thanks.
This is not a good plan.
This is not good.
You know, there's a couple things women don't like.
It's like calling them douchebags.
It's like not a good plan, my friend.
Yes.
You think the train is dangerous?
Huh?
Yeah, wait until you get the rolling pin in the head at night.
Yeah.
Clunk.
Ken Gomez, Santa Barbara, California, 5150.
First time donor rolled in the 111 Club.
Thank you.
Love no agenda.
John C. and Adam is, and whatever.
Man.
So he doesn't like you.
He doesn't like me.
Gregory Van Mullen, Bakersfield, California, 50 bucks.
The potholes in Bakersfield are driving me crazy.
You and me both.
JamesFreeHallowBooks.com, Summerfield, North Carolina, halfway to Nighthood, launched a new website thanks to No Agenda producer Lee Bartlemy, Who graciously donated the services to bring freehollowbooks.com into the 21st century.
Check him out at leebartlesme.com.
That's L-E-B-A-R-T-E-L-M-E. So it's Bartle Me.
He wants a de-douche and a karma.
You've been de-douched.
You've got karma.
Tight, tight, despite the sickness.
I'm tight.
You've always been tight.
James Pierce, Copper's Cove, Texas.
Hey guys, the town is pronounced Copperous Cove.
Copperous Cove.
Copperous Cove, yeah.
I just wanted to send you a little cash to thank you for doing the show on a holiday.
Crepe up the good, great work, says James Pierce out there in Texas.
Well, we all know that this is the Terror Bunny holiday.
We appreciate that.
We appreciate everybody else who helped us out.
We're a little...
Looking forward to the next couple of shows.
We're getting to show 300.
Encourage everybody to get on one of our 300 programs, any way, shape, or form.
We want to thank everyone who also gave us lesser amounts of money.
Well, supporting the show is really all we ever ask for.
And I was thinking about this.
There's more people who are trying to do this now.
I noticed.
Some people have actually copied parts of our model.
But first of all, we encourage copying anything from the show.
And this is not to be underestimated.
I think that what a lot of people who are saying, hey, wait a minute, what a brilliant idea, just ask people to send you money.
You have to have a couple things.
A, a good product.
It's taken us four years.
To make this product to what you want it to be.
And it's pretty much a full-time gig.
Don't forget we have the NoAgendaNewsNetwork.com where just a continuous supply, an endless supply of great material is coming in.
So we've got servers running.
We've got the NoAgendaWorld.com, the directory that I'm building.
So, you know, it's a real collaborative effort, but the great thing is everything is freely available for you to do whatever you want.
There's like no copyrights, we're not going to sue you, you know, please, you know, what if people are making dolls of our heads now?
I mean, it's crazy stuff going on, but that's the only way it works when you're really involved in it, and then, you know, you give value for value, whatever you think the show is worth.
Right, and we create our own, we essentially create a little universe around the show, and people appreciate it.
We do have themes and theses, and we give people five hours a week of quality material that they can listen to in their car, they can listen to while they're working out.
I mean, it's a lot of work.
We do 20 hours a month, which is, if you compare that to what you pay for a two-hour movie, you'll pay, what, 20?
It would take a family of three to a movie, you're out $100, and you do that...
A couple times a month.
I mean, it's not really asking too much to ask people to become a producer and give us 50 to whatever.
And you can save time by giving up on watching all the stupid crap on cable news.
Yeah, we're actually saving you money.
We're saving you money and time.
You don't have to think about what's new.
Mickey, she keeps telling people whenever they say, I stopped watching the news once I started living with Adam.
I get all the news.
And it's funny at the same time.
Sometimes.
We have a minor entertainment value.
We try.
We try.
Anyway, the place to support the show...
And we have a couple other backups in case you are behind the great firewall of China.
You can always go to NoAgendaNation.com.
Which is a great website, actually.
I really like what Eric DeShield has done there.
And, of course, noagendashow.com.
There's a link there.
And then we've got all the shutupslave.com slash donate and seanhanity.com slash donate.
And, of course, as of today, we also have the hotmatureplumpers.com.
Noagendashow.ca.
your plumpers.
I love it when people encourage me to sing along.
Stefan Schoen says happy birthday to his wife Carrie, who celebrates today.
Grebulon, call me Grebulon, turns 42 on Tuesday, April 26th.
And Kate Infinger wishes her brother Timmy Hammer a very happy birthday.
He turned 35 yesterday, April 23rd.
Happy birthday from your buddies here.
Happy birthday!
And, hey, we haven't had one of these in a while, which is kind of good, I guess, John.
Here it goes.
You can whip out your blade there.
I think it's stuck.
No, it's not.
It's good.
David Dolson, please step forward, my friend, as you have now achieved the inner circle.
With your giving level up to a minimum of $1,000 to the No Agenda show, supporting the program, keeping it running, you are now a Knight of the No Agenda Roundtable.
After I, Knight B, Sir David Dolson, Knight of the No Agenda Roundtable, please come on over, sit down, enjoy the show, and your hookers are blown!
And a ring will be forthcoming, so hopefully you've sent your ring size into Eric the Shill, shill at noagentonation.com.
And do we have a status?
Because Miss Mickey's getting a little anxious.
They're getting there.
Because she wants her engagement ring, and I'm like, yeah.
You're going to give her one of these as an engagement ring?
Absolutely.
Yeah.
Oh, she'll wear it.
She'll wear it.
Well, she'll wear the ring, but this ain't going to cut it.
I've got to tell you, you know...
Unless we put a big stone in it.
No, she doesn't need a big stone.
She doesn't.
Right, honey?
I had an interesting ring incident yesterday.
I had to take off my ring really quickly because we had our kind of Easter thing yesterday because we do the show on Sunday.
And Mickey's big on the Easter breakfast and everything.
And I was going to open up one of those rolls of biscuits that comes in the container, and it exploded in my hand.
Fillsbury, yeah.
Yeah, it exploded in my hand and really hurt my finger.
It started to swell up.
I had to take off my ring really quickly, otherwise I would have had to cut it off.
These cans are dangerous.
It literally exploded.
You obviously don't know you did it wrong.
No, I didn't.
I followed the instruction.
You bang it and twist it.
No, the instruction says you peel off the label and then you use a spoon along the seal to pop it open.
And I peeled off the label and went pow!
And of course there's metal on both ends and the metal, I have like blood blisters now because it shoved the skin down to the bone of my ring finger.
And Mickey immediately is like, let's sue them!
I'm like, honey, that's not a way to make money.
That's weird, that's dangerous.
Too much TV. Too much Housewives of Beverly Hills.
I'll sue you.
I'll sue you, I tell you.
The olden days, you take one of those things and you tear off, I think it did.
You bang it on the counter and it pops open.
Then you untwist it and you got your little biscuits.
Yeah, but this exploded in my hands before I could even press the spoon against it or do anything.
Did you put it in the oven or something before you opened it?
No, it was in the fridge where it belongs.
I don't know, man.
It was freaky.
So beware of exploding biscuit tins.
I'd send a letter of complaint to the company.
You'll probably get a couple coupons for more biscuits.
For more exploding biscuits.
Oh, boy.
Hey, they've come up with a...
This is crazy.
So we have a housing crisis in America, in case you hadn't noticed, in Gitmo Nation here.
And so I guess what's going on is we have all these homes that have been foreclosed on, and the banks are just like...
They're not doing anything.
They just let them rot away.
This, I think, was on CNBC. Aaron Burnett of the Council of Foreign Relations, the disappointing shill.
And there's this discussion between, who's the crazy guy who's always from Plimco Bonds or whatever.
What's his name?
I have no idea.
The guy was always yelling.
Anyway, what to do with the homes?
Existing home sales higher in March.
You just heard the headlines.
But still, 6.3% below where we were a year ago.
So, we want to throw out this idea that people have talked about over the past few years, but maybe it's finally time to realize we need to do it.
Should we tear down abandoned homes, foreclosed homes, or even built homes by the home builders that all the fixtures and the Wi-Fi or whatever, even the color, just not We're not going to be stylish by the time people actually want to buy them.
This was astounding to me.
What?
The Wi-Fi or the color?
It's the wrong color.
The color and the Wi-Fi will not be stylish, so let's tear the place down.
Well, how decadent is this woman?
I know, I know.
It's like, wow, I can't believe you're saying this.
The Wi-Fi.
Oh, you have the wrong plants.
Tear down the house.
You have the wrong Wi-Fi.
You don't, you don't, you have N. You have silly old G Wi-Fi.
Down with the house, down with the house.
Down with the house it goes, I tell you.
Wi-Fi won't be stylish.
It won't be stylish.
It's repainted.
And so, of course, what she's actually suggesting, and which I'm sure is thus the talking point at the Council on Foreign Relations, is that the government pay for this.
Rick Santelli, that's the guy's name.
Rick Santelli.
Joe LaVornia is chief U.S. economist at Deutsche Bank.
So we have Deutsche Bank.
So Bankshill and then this other guy.
Also, and of course, Rick Santelli.
Joe LaVornia, what do you think?
I think it's a great idea, Aaron.
I mean, the old Keynesian adage was, in a downturn, have people dig ditches and then pay them to fill them back up again.
So that's the message.
Have them dig ditches and then pay them to fill them back up again.
That's what we're going to do.
Just rip them down because they're not stylish.
If we have excess housing, why not pay to remove the excess supply from the market?
The marginal price goes up, people feel wealthier, and it deals with the problem.
Rick Santelli, isn't there something to be said for this?
You know, I wouldn't think it's a bad idea as long as there's a few minor guidelines.
A, it shouldn't count on taxpayer dollars to do any of it.
It should be done within the guidelines of municipal, village, state laws.
Maybe they need to condemn properties and then force the owner of records to knock them down.
I think the process is fine, but once again, it's about bureaucracy versus, you know, the legal framework of which is capable of handling issues like this.
Actually, I got into a big argument, which I'm not going to play, because the bank guy, of course, was saying, well, the government should just pay for that.
And that makes no sense, because if I let my house go to crap, then essentially, or eventually, the city council will come up and say, hey, you've got to fix your stuff, otherwise we're going to condemn you.
Right?
And then it's at the owner's cost that they do something.
And these guys, these banksters, are saying, yeah, it's a good idea.
Like this guy from Deutsche Bank.
Yeah, good idea!
Yeah, tear it down.
Have the government pay for it to be torn down.
Why don't the government pay to put people back into the house that they got thrown out?
Oh, please.
Why doesn't the government give the public some money?
No, the slaves.
It's unbelievable that this idea would even show up.
Oh, let's build a bunch of houses.
Oh, let's tear them down.
Why tear them down?
There's not a housing shortage.
There's a loan shortage in this country.
There's plenty of people who love to be in these houses.
It's unbelievably wasteful.
I'll take one.
Give me one.
And decadent.
I'll take the crappy Wi-Fi.
Funny color.
I don't mind mauve.
That's fine.
I'll paint.
I'll use a magic marker.
That's the most specious thing I've ever heard anybody say, oh, oh, the paint job that's not raw.
The Wi-Fi is not stylish.
By the time they're going to sell, it just won't be stylish, will it now?
It's bad, isn't it?
Oh, it's terrible.
That's a great, great find.
Yeah, we should keep that around because I guarantee you...
Keep it.
I can just hear Obama going, hello, everybody!
Well, you know, we've decided that we have to tear down the homes because, you know, by the time that people are ready to buy, the Wi-Fi and the color won't be stylish.
So, we've decided...
Hello, everybody!
I can just see him saying it.
Let me just hear that again.
I just have to listen to that one more time.
Existing home sales higher in March.
You just heard the headlines, but still 6.3% below where we were a year ago.
So we want to throw out this idea that people have talked about over the past few years, but maybe it's finally time to realize we need to do it.
Should we tear down abandoned homes, foreclosed homes, or even built homes by the home builders that all the fixtures and the Wi-Fi or whatever, even the color?
Just not going to be stylish by the time people actually want to buy them.
Hello, everybody.
Put it in the folder that says classics.
Yeah, it's unbelievable.
And you know she's in the Council of Foreign Relations, so they're talking about this like, yeah, this is a good idea.
I got an idea.
You're going to hear Obama talking about this.
In fact, I have a clip from our president, and it's unbelievable.
So I'm sure this did not go unnoticed, John, that the president, he's come out and said, you know, There might be some funny business going on with them oil prices.
I think I need a task force.
A task force to check that there's no funny business going on with speculators.
This guy's always got a task force.
Well, this is actually Holders, our Attorney General, his task force.
And so, of course, it's crazy now that we're at, what, $112 a barrel of oil?
Is that kind of the average now?
So, of course, we've played clip after clip of this is, of course, manipulation.
And the whole oil market is always about manipulation.
Listen to Mr.
Oil's crude oil show and you'll hear how it works.
It's all about the inventories.
So, the president comes out on his weekly address.
You've got to say it address because we're in the milieu.
Of the milieu.
Of the allies.
And materiel.
And he does something unbelievable.
He comes out and he says...
When is the address scheduled, by the way?
It's scheduled on Friday.
It's on Friday night.
The address comes out for the materiel and personnel and human resources.
It's human resources.
And listen to what he says.
First, he slams people who come out with a three-point plan whenever gas prices are high to proceed by giving his own three-point plan.
Whenever gas prices shoot up, like clockwork, you see politicians racing to the cameras, waving three-point plans for $2 gas.
You see people trying to grab headlines or score a few points.
The truth is, there is no silver bullet that can bring down gas prices right away.
But there are a few things we can do.
Okay, let's have our three-point plan!
This includes safe and responsible production of oil at home.
One.
Which we're pursuing.
In fact, last year, American oil production reached its highest level since 2003.
On Thursday, my attorney general also launched a task force with just one job, rooting out cases of fraud or manipulation in the oil markets that might affect gas prices, including any illegal activity by traders and speculators.
We're going to make sure that no one is taking advantage of gas prices.
Okay.
And another step we need to take is to finally end the $4 billion in taxpayer subsidies we give to the oil and gas companies each year.
So the guy is so brazen, he says whenever gas prices are high, politicians always hogging the camera as he's on camera using his address.
To deliver exactly what he said every bonehead does, deliver a three-point plan.
Well, that's what he said.
I mean, if you look at the thing overall, he made this statement of fact, which is that every time gas prices go up, politicians come out and deliver three-point plans.
And here's my three-point plan.
And here's mine.
It's crazy.
It's crazy.
It's absolutely nuts.
It's funny the way it's structured because what he's done here is he, first he makes it look as though everybody, it's one of those things where you do what everybody else does, but first you scold them for doing it.
It's like bad, bad, bad.
You guys do it as though you're doing it wrong.
So let me do it.
He notches himself up above the fray.
Very well done, I thought.
Extremely well done, but still, like, wow.
Really?
A little bold.
So, in other words, we've done nothing about the speculating and scamming up until now, and now we're going to put a task force together.
No one's been named, as far as I know.
I want to see who's nominated to this task force.
This may be a triggering mechanism speech designed to alert...
The speculators that they should start consolidating their positions and get ready to short that baby.
That's right.
That's right.
So I'll keep an eye on that because if that's the case, then there's a number of opportunities.
So you think it's going to go down?
They're going to drive it down?
Is that the idea?
Because I think it should hit at least 148.
It's got to hit that magic high.
That may be a myth.
It may be like, you know, that may be a target for the suckers.
I mean, I'm still thinking 200 is viable.
I know you don't believe that.
They talk 200 is a big game.
I mean, I don't know.
Because I don't know what...
I'm not in on the mechanism, whatever the code is.
But it's obvious that something's up.
And now's the time that people that are in on it...
It's a message.
It's definitely a message.
They'll do the right thing, whatever that is.
Well, I think...
Wouldn't it be amazing if it was basically a message saying, alright, we're all out now.
Go.
We got you back.
We got you covered.
And so now the president can say, well, it was really because of all the Arab Spring and all the bad stuff.
And we couldn't stop it.
We made sure no one was speculating.
We had our task force.
That would be really, really, really bad.
But it's possible.
It's possible.
Anything's possible.
Isn't that crazy, though?
What kind of world do we live in, man?
I like the three-point, by the way, and three is the operative number.
Yep.
Three-point plan, and then he does the three-point plan, and so there's something's amiss, or something's up.
Some code has been delivered, and somebody who knows what they're doing will be doing whatever they have to do.
I see you have a clip here.
I would not go long oil, let's put it that way.
No, I mean, I'm...
Or maybe I should.
Maybe I've got it backwards.
You have money?
No.
I'm broke.
That's my point.
Mimi and I coordinated on taxes for this year.
We're like, the wives.
The wives, like, Mimi, we're broke.
She's like, yeah.
And you've got a family.
You support a real family.
I only got one dependent human resource sucking up resources.
So I saw you had a clip about Alzheimer's, which is now in the news like crazy.
Yeah, when I saw this one, in fact, I have it.
I have the clip.
It's titled, More PR for Alzheimer's.
There's something up.
Yeah, no.
I'm tracking it.
So Alzheimer's being dumped into...
PR is being put into the news, and with the new element, the new one and new element, which is in this little piece, the new element, which is that there's three stages to Alzheimer's now.
Oh, yeah.
Also on the Health Watch.
I'm sorry.
No, go ahead.
Hit it.
For the first time in nearly three decades, the guidelines doctors use to diagnose Alzheimer's are changing.
That means more than 10 million people could be impacted by the disease.
Here's Action News reporter Robert Bezell with his details.
We talked a little bit about your forgetfulness.
The new guidelines recognize Alzheimer's as a disease that unfolds over years, probably decades.
And they identify five million Americans, like Kippy Reader, as having a pre-Alzheimer's condition called mild cognitive impairment, or MCI. The guidelines spell out three stages of Alzheimer's.
First come changes in the brain with no symptoms.
No one knows how many people are affected.
MCI is the second stage where people lose some memory but can still function.
Where is this from?
This guy talks like an NPR douche.
I think it's a package.
This is a PR package.
It's a pre-produced package.
This guy is not...
I think it's a package because it comes from a small station in the middle of California Salinas.
Oh no, so they don't have this kind of journalist staff, personality staff.
They don't have that voice.
No way, no way.
The third stage is full-blown Alzheimer's.
Full-blown Alzheimer's.
Full-blown Alzheimer's.
Major memory loss, which afflicts 5.4 million.
So that part of the brain is not working very well.
Experts like Dr.
Ronald Peterson of the Mayo Clinic say the new guidelines will have little direct benefit for patients now, but should lead to better treatments in the future.
What we need are the drugs that really go after the underlying disease mechanism itself.
To understand the disease and find those drugs, the Mayo Clinic has been studying older people over years.
Now I have four words for you to try to remember.
The undergo memory test.
I didn't remember any of them.
Together with brain scans, blood tests.
Oh my God.
So I know what this is about.
Okay.
Vaccine for Alzheimer's may be only two years away.
Yeah, that's what...
Did you just find that on the web?
No, I had it prepared for the show because I saw the exact same...
When I got this clip, I had the same thing in mind.
Right, so Alzheimer's redefined...
And that's why they add the new element.
First, the Alzheimer's used to always be memory loss and then you forget everything.
But now it's the part, there's no symptoms.
No, you can't tell the symptoms, but if you forget something, oh, I'm sorry, you need to take the shot.
Because I think, you know, you don't want to get Alzheimer's or anything.
No, this is disgusting.
This is the long game of the pharmaceutical industry who put this clip together.
This is a pre-package paid for.
I'd love to find out if anyone else around Gitmo Nation saw this package.
Because I guarantee you the same package ran somewhere else.
With the same douchebag reading the voiceover.
Um...
So, here's the quote.
The real new component here is you need not even to have memory impairment to have Alzheimer's dementia.
As they're ratcheting down the dementia criteria.
And the vaccine, also known as Bapineuzumab.
B-A-P-I-N-E-U-Z-U-M-A-B. Crikey.
Currently being tested in more than 10,000 patients around the world has been shown to prevent and in some cases reverse the buildup of amyloid protein, the substance that collects inside.
It's a black crap.
Yeah, black.
It's a bull crap.
Everyone's ramping up for this.
Rite Aid says they are now increasing number of staff in California who are certified to administer vaccines.
Because you're going to go to the Rite Aid.
You're going to go to Walmart to go get your vaccine people.
Yeah, almost over the last two years, pharmacies have been giving more people shots than doctors.
The federal government has given a $200 million contract to vaccinate corporations for their innovative vaccine-producing methods.
That it could help inoculate the nation in the face of potential pandemic.
It's a bonanza.
It's a bonanza.
You know, I told you Christina had one of her friends over here last night, and I actually had hope for the new generation.
Oh, you don't!
The kid's in his mid-twenties, you know, he's a musician.
Hopeless.
No, he's not hopeless, because he said something that really struck me, and I was like, I'm so happy to hear this.
And I was like, I guess at one point Christina said, you know, my dad had the swine flu.
He's like, really?
You had the swine flu?
I said, yeah, you don't die from it.
You just feel really sick for a week, and this is not it.
This is not the swine flu.
And so, of course, immediately he went to vaccines, and he said, you had the shot?
I said, no, I'm not taking any vaccination.
And I said, do you?
And he says, anything that's free, I tend to stay away from.
I was like, yeah, that's good.
There's hope.
When the government's handing out something for free, I don't really like to take it.
Now, in the meantime, researchers have discovered that people who are on statins, you know, this is like, is it to lower blood pressure, statins?
No, no, statins are to lower cholesterol.
Cholesterol.
Cholesterol.
Which half the country apparently is on.
Yeah.
Study shows statins cause memory loss.
Oh, perfect.
Perfect lead-in for the next scam.
Exactly.
So you get memory loss from the statins.
Oh, now you need the vaccine for the Alzheimer's.
Alzheimer's.
It's, you know, undetectable early.
And by the way, Alzheimer's is a horrible disease.
It's the worst.
It sucks ass.
I mean, it's really, really, it can be humorous.
It can really be humorous.
It's sick.
Yeah.
Ah, it can be humorous.
But no, it's horrible.
It's like, just absolutely...
Yeah, that's why they're going to...
Whoever rolls out the vaccine, whatever drug company, I would invest in them.
Well, they're all going to be rolling it out, of course.
There'll be a lead.
There's always a lead.
Let us remind everybody that in the United States of Gitmo Nation, I believe pretty much around the world, you cannot sue the drug manufacturers If you get, like, oh, I don't know, narcolepsy from one of these shots?
Or if the thing's a total turkey, it doesn't do anything.
But you get sick because of it.
You cannot sue them.
And this is what this health care bill is all about.
It's not about making you better.
It's about giving people medicine before they're even sick at all.
Next, psychiatrists are now trying to label grief as a mental disorder so that they could issue mood-altering pills.
That's great, isn't it?
It just gets better.
Hey, those of you who are stupid enough to take those new contraceptive pills that stop you from having your period, like that's a good idea, turns out that could develop dangerous blood clots.
Really?
You think?
Yeah.
And then the vaccine train just rolls on.
Doctors are now demanding that a billboard in Times Square, which is an anti-vaccine billboard, be removed.
Because, of course, it's dangerous because people might get the wrong idea about life-saving vaccines.
The Pediatric Infectious Disease Society wants a ban on vaccine exemptions.
I mean, they're rolling this out big time.
I have like 18 stories all about vaccines.
HPV, they're still pushing that crap.
To 13-year-olds.
Yeah, even if they're not sexually active, they need to have the vaccine.
And shingles vaccine.
It's just, it's crazy.
I'm sorry.
There are some vaccines that I think have saved a lot.
Yeah, polio.
Probably diphtheria.
There are early ones that came out.
It's only this recent spate of dubious vaccines for everything from smoking to crazy ailments that nobody ever gets.
Cocaine addiction.
Yeah.
Cocaine addiction.
There's a vaccine for that.
It's nuts.
Okay, well, I think we've made our point.
We'll keep an eye on this Alzheimer's promotion for Alzheimer's, which is going on actively.
And watch the TV. Watch the TV, John, because there's a lot of Alzheimer's stuff going on.
There'll be Alzheimer's stories on Law& Order, CIS. There'll be all over the place.
Oh, right.
Yeah.
No, we've got to watch the drama.
We've got to watch the drama for it.
Absolutely.
So I got to just change the topic to lighten things up a little bit.
From death by forgetfulness.
So I ran into this ad and the first time I heard it, it's laced with double entendre and...
And I realized it.
And I looked at it.
There's an ad for...
It's a sandals ad for this resort community, which I guess competes in some way with Club Med.
But I did some research.
It's like a resort you go to...
But you have to be a couple to go, which means there's going to be, you know, supposedly for lovers.
Swapping.
Wife swapping.
I'm thinking that's what I was thinking.
I was looking at wife swapping, and by the way, when I was...
You just happened to be looking at wife swapping, and then...
No, no, I got this first.
I got the idea that it might be about wife swapping.
Uh-huh, uh-huh.
But when looking up wife swapping, I found that apparently there's a wife swapping underground of people in RVs.
No.
Yes.
Is that in the clip?
No.
No.
I just did this part of my research.
You've got to be.
Wife Swapping RV Club.
No.
Send me the URL for that.
Just look up Wife Swapping RV and you'll find plenty.
Now listen to this ad and tell me that they're trying to play it up as some sort of a business thing, but listen to every moment is some sexual double entendre or suggestion.
Imagine a place that inspires the senses, indulges the soul, and invokes the spirit where unique traditions merge with progress and enterprise.
Economically strong.
Politically stable.
Tia, you're playing the ad for Indonesia.
Politically stable.
This is the Indonesia ad.
You have to play the ad for sex and sandals.
I'm sorry.
It's an ad for Indonesia.
I'm thinking, wait a minute, what is this?
I thought we were going to Indonesia.
I don't see an ad for sandals.
It's down there.
Oh, it was confusing.
I'm sorry.
I'm ill.
Welcome to a world filled with liquid assets.
Oh.
Where mergers happen daily.
And bonds are highly valued.
Here, your options are unlimited.
Your rewards assured.
And specialists are always on call.
From successful rallies to promising futures.
Get down to the business of pleasure at Sandals.
Book now.
Save up to 65%.
Call 1-800-SANDALS. So, um...
What's the specialists that are always available?
24-7, baby!
This item will clarify to you how to locate a good wife-swapping camping site.
We have an RV that sleeps, too, all equipped.
The RV Parade Wife Swapping Ramble was one of the best!
Oh my gosh!
In this world of wife swapping of professional couples to...
Oh my god, this is like horrible.
I told ya!
RVing in the Cram-A-Lot Inn.
I hope Mickey's...
Cram-A-Lot, that's what you want to call it.
Cram-A-Lot, Sir Cram-A-Lot.
This is horrible.
Needless to say, Mickey is not planning on stopping at Sir Cram-A-Lot's Inn.
Might be one of our knights there.
There comes Mickey.
Honey, this is John.
Okay, it's John.
He has early Alzheimer's.
I'm voting for the Marine.
You're voting for...
Mickey's like, I'm voting for the Marine now.
She wants the ex-Marine to take his RV now.
You're right, you can have a protector.
Yeah.
Oh my, she's so sick.
Poor girl.
She's never sick unless she's like hammered with this thing.
I'm like drenched in sweat.
I hope someone appreciates what we do for this show.
Drenched in sweat.
Drenched in sweat.
Especially after reading about the wife swap in New York.
Sir Cramalot Inn.
Sir Cramalot Inn.
Hi, I'm Sir Cramalot.
This is not good.
I don't care what you say.
So, I didn't say it was good.
I just told you to be wary.
Can I bring up something that I've noticed?
Sure.
There's a hit going...
Oh, hold on a second.
The laughing made me dizzy.
Hold on, I just gotta...
The laughing made me dizzy.
I swear to God.
That's terrible.
It is.
I think, you know, we've discussed this many times.
It feels to me like they're trying to hit the FBI, the CIA or the NSA, whoever.
There's a lot of media attention going on about discrediting the FBI. And in particular, a couple reports.
Well, and so this was not on C-SPAN, which I'm really pissed about.
But apparently, what's his name?
Robert Mueller, the director of the FBI, told Congress Wednesday that the FBI has not technically solved any crime since 2001.
What?
Yeah.
Yeah.
And so, of course, I'm like, you know, it wasn't on C-SPAN. At least I didn't see it.
I checked the website.
There's nothing there.
I've searched all over the place.
Mueller is not even in the C-SPAN database.
I saw it.
Oh, really?
Because I've seen him on C-SPAN. Well, not in recent years, at least.
He says the agency has been, quote, busy with a lot of other stuff during the 10-year span.
After confirming the FBI does indeed have more than 13,000 special agents deployed to investigate cases all across the country, Mueller stressed that the Bureau's internal process was complicated, and the fact that not one case file has been closed in the past decade is not unexpected.
According to records, the last case the FBI officially solved was a Topeka, Kansas mail fraud offense in February of 2001.
Quote, it's hard to explain to a layman precisely how our operations work, but it's really more about analyzing crimes than it is about actually, you know, arresting perpetrators and convicting them, a fidgeting Mueller said.
It's a process, is what I'm trying to say.
It isn't always so simple as solved and unsolved.
That's been specifically true this decade, I think.
So that's like, I'm like, wow, really?
And then all of a sudden, this report pops up on CNN. With some heavy-ass music, of course, to accentuate the point.
This is the FBI we know and trust.
Agents who take down bank robbers.
The mob.
Russian sleeper cells.
Agents who swear to uphold fidelity, bravery, integrity.
But what we found inside one of the most respected federal intelligence and law enforcement agencies doesn't always match that image.
Why did you lie?
I panicked.
I lied about speaking to somebody about a piece of information.
Ashamed that he was caught, fearful that he'll be identified, the story of this former agent who illegally searched the FBI database for personal use and then lied about it is not unique.
Matter of fact, the FBI confirms about 1,000 cases of misconduct over the last three years.
Many are highlighted right here in confidential summaries of disciplinary reports that we obtained.
Bad behavior that may have you wondering why many of these employees didn't lose their jobs.
So what's not in that little piece of video is labeled on the page, quote, FBI agents making sex tapes, paying strippers, leaking national secrets.
I mean, there's something afoot here.
The agency is being discredited severely.
Huh.
And then, of course, President Obama is now doing more than hinting that Leon Panetta should become the next Secretary of Defense.
So the CIA director is moving over to be the head of killing people illegally instead of covertly.
There's shifting.
I don't know who's in charge, but it ain't the FBI. The FBI is getting hammered.
Someone's out to discredit them and make them look really bad.
Homeland Security.
Probably.
They're the only growing agency that's just pretty much taken over the place and telling everyone to screw themselves when they have congressional hearings, as we pointed out in the last show.
Yeah, they didn't even show up.
They didn't even show up.
Screw you.
They have their own rules.
They're essentially becoming the secret police, if anyone hasn't noticed.
And they took over one of the military arms for some reason, which I guess they could rationalize, which is the Coast Guard.
And so they have weaponry.
And they have these Viper teams.
The Viper teams.
And what are the Viper teams doing, John?
The Viper teams?
Yeah, the Viper.
We talked about them before, and they were showing up at railroad stations, and just after people get off the train to go to work, they stop them and search them.
In fact, it happened again just this past week in Florida.
Law enforcement were on their toes today for an early morning terror drill on tri-rail.
This was the scene at the tri-rail station in West Palm Beach.
West Palm Beach police led the exercise along with the Palm Beach County Sheriff's Office and officials from the Transportation Safety Administration.
This was part of a three-county exercise stretching south from the Palm Beaches to Miami.
So they're literally on, like, the platform as people get off of the train.
Pay pass, please!
It's scary.
Yeah, what are they looking for?
They never say.
No, it's an exercise.
It's just an exercise.
It's just an exercise.
An exercise to harass the public.
Just an exercise.
And of course the public doesn't, you know, make a fuss about it.
No, of course not.
No, of course not.
We just shut up like good little slaves.
Like this.
Just take your message.
That's right.
Take your meds, slave.
Shut up.
Sit down.
So, George Bush was back in town.
Really?
What's he doing?
Apparently Bill Frisk, who was an ex-head of the U.S. Senate leader, they were having a ceremony to extol his past virtues and to reveal a new portrait in the Senate of him.
A portrait of George Bush in the Senate?
No, no, of Bill Frisk.
And George Bush was in town for that?
Yeah, because I guess they were good pals, and so Bush came up and gave a little speech in his old-fashioned way, and it was just like, wow, now we kind of miss him.
He was a goofball, and he tries to be funny.
And he's not.
And he's not, but he amuses himself, obviously, because he chuckles constantly.
Yeah, yeah.
And I just thought it was interesting to have a reprise.
This took place last month in March.
A reprise of George for everyone out there so we see what we've been missing.
Republican Democratic leaders here in the Senate, it's my distinct honor and pleasure to introduce to each of you the 43rd President of the United States, George W. Bush.
Thank you all.
applause Thank you.
Please be seated.
Thank you all.
Please be seated.
Thank you all.
It takes a really good friend to get me to come back to Washington.
I am thrilled to be here.
Laura sends her love to Karen and Bill.
Bill, like me, was wise enough to marry a Texan.
I'm proud to be here with Senator Reed and Senator McConnell.
They represent the present.
I represent the past.
Shysters show up and take advantage of people's goodwill and generosity.
I welcome those who have served In the past, Mr.
Vice President, Mr.
Secretary, and others, I can assure you, Bill, that we are delighted to be here to watch you hang.
This is boring.
Hang his picture, get it?
Yeah, I know, I get it.
Hey, by the way, I just want to say, I'm pretty sure that FBI article was fake, by the way.
That can't be real.
What?
The FBI thing about them not solving a single case since 2001, that can't be real.
That can't be real.
Well, we have to document it one way or the other now that you brought it up.
Yeah, it can't be real.
Chat room, go figure that out, will you?
Well, not exactly.
Alright, that's enough.
You know, it's just his giggling he does.
It's kind of what Jon Stewart will always like to make fun of.
But anyway, that's Bush.
That's the guy we used to have.
It's interesting because I had a contrasting clip of Obama who is actually, his comic timing is impeccable.
Obama's timing is great.
That's what I said.
It's impeccable.
He had this joke.
Maybe I'll put it on the Sunday.
You don't have the clip?
This is Sunday, John.
Today is Sunday.
John, today is Sunday.
It's Sunday.
You keep saying Sunday.
Thursday show.
Thursday show.
You know what that is, don't you?
What?
It's Alzheimer's.
Oh, I better get a vaccination.
Apparently this was originally from The Onion, this story.
Oh, you read an Onion article?
Well, obviously it wasn't on The Onion.
I'm willing to admit it, but it doesn't mean that The Onion isn't in on the game to discredit the FBI. Oh, that could be.
Oh, yeah, okay, so I'm Googling it now.
Yeah, all right, obviously.
Onion, very funny.
But, you know, there's discrediting of the FBI going on everywhere, so the Onion may be in on the game.
I don't know.
I don't think so.
I don't think the Onion's in on anything, to be honest about it.
How do those guys make money?
Boy, they sure have a lot of production costs.
Have you ever looked at some of the stuff they do?
It's amazing.
It's great.
It's ultra slick.
It's got a lot of post.
It can't be cheap to produce.
No, it's got to be expensive.
Hence my point.
We made a mistake about something else the other day.
What was it?
First of all, I'm...
Oh, it's Mark Taiby.
It was not the guy who broke the story on...
Yeah, it wasn't the McChrystal story.
Yeah, it was that other guy.
Yeah, it wasn't Matt Mark.
Matt.
Mark Taiby.
That's a new note we're using.
Another one for the BS filter.
Mark.
Right, Mark Taiby.
I'm sick.
I'm sorry.
That one slipped by me.
Well, at least you corrected it in real time.
Yeah, but...
It didn't go out as a big news item.
No, but...
Idiots suckered by onions story.
Right.
But think about it.
Those guys, I just don't see where they're making the money to come up with that kind of production.
And that writing, I mean, these are not crappy writers.
These are good writers.
Yeah.
No, there's a highly talented group of people.
But they publish, they do stuff in print, right?
Yeah, they have a print, a little newspaper they send.
I think it comes out once a week.
I get it once in a while.
I think it's amazing.
And so I'm just wondering where their money's coming from.
Okay, well now we straighten that out.
Although it was believable.
That's the problem with some of these stories.
Yeah.
I've got a clip.
This is an interesting little message from Gwyneth Paltrow that she had on Glee that was actually run on the O'Reilly Factor and the pinheads and patriot thing.
And if anyone's ever seen that, you know, you take a vote on whether she's a pinhead or a patriot for saying something.
Mm-hmm.
And everyone, all these O'Reilly listeners thought that this was great.
They actually said she was a patriot for making this kind of, I think, kind of weird commentary.
We live in a culture of insults.
I mean, we're constantly bombarded with these images of people who are richer than us and happier than us.
We tear them down to feel better about ourselves.
And we don't just stop with the people who are on TV or in magazines.
We do it to everybody.
And we think that because it's done anonymously, there are no ramifications.
But there are ramifications, guys, because it makes you comfortable with insensitivity.
You know, this is interesting because she actually got slammed very, very heavily in other media for coming out and saying this.
And Scott Adams, the Dilbert guy, he wrote a lengthy piece and he said, I'm coming to Gwyneth Paltrow's defense.
Because she was getting...
So, of course, I don't watch O'Reilly.
That's your job.
Why would she get slammed for this?
This sounds like a classic, kind of a liberal attitude.
Because you cannot come out and defend yourself as a celebrity.
That's not done.
It's like the big trap.
You can't come out...
No, but why was she...
Who attacked her?
Everybody's like, oh, shut up.
You've got millions of dollars.
This is the same thing.
It always happens.
Oh, you're complaining about the paparazzis.
You've got millions of dollars.
Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up.
She was playing a character on a TV show for one thing.
Yeah, but people can't tell the difference anymore.
I'm just saying.
That's how it goes.
I don't know why this is a topic on the show, actually.
I don't understand.
It's the clip of Palooza.
I mean, I see you here, EU beginning of the end.
Oh, this is the clip of the day as far as I'm concerned.
Okay, first of all, can I mention, speaking of the EU, Belgium now officially over one year without a government.
Good on you.
We'll give them a little Hot Pockets there.
Hot Pockets!
Good job, Belgium.
And what difference has it made?
Nothing.
It's great.
Everything's groovy.
So I'm watching the BBC and there's this little piece and I go, oh my, this has got to be part of the whole, you know, I'm not a fan of the EU. I don't think you are necessarily.
I don't believe it's got many legs, and it's an undemocratic operation, and it seems to be just thrown together just to compete with the United States as some sort of economic machine.
And, of course, now it's $1.45 to get a euro.
It's ridiculous.
It's $48.
It's ridiculous.
So, anyway, here is the...
I don't know if you know this is going on, but this, to me, could be the beginning of the end.
France says it wants a mechanism to suspend visa-free travel around the European Union.
This is about the Schengen agreement.
Yeah, I have this listed in the show notes.
After an influx of thousands of migrants fleeing the upheaval in Libya and Tunisia, a French official said there should be a means to put the Schengen accord into abeyance when there's a systemic failure at an external EU border.
They left North Africa for Italy, but now migrants like these ones are causing a political storm in France.
Thousands fled unrest and fighting back home for a new life in Italy.
At the start, they lived in squalid conditions.
Some described the situation as a humanitarian crisis.
But the Italian government has now housed most of them in proper camps and given many temporary visas.
That's what's causing the problem.
The Schengen Agreement allows free movement of people between most European countries.
Armed with temporary visas, many of the migrants have been heading to France.
In Paris, there's anger.
Now a senior official at the Presidential Palace has told journalists there should be times like these when EU member countries can suspend the Schengen Agreement.
In other words, a temporary re-imposition of border controls.
Yeah, this is a very big deal, and this has been something that's been bubbling under for years.
The United Kingdom, as far as I understand it, did not sign on to the Schengen Accord.
And so the deal with the United States of Europe...
Is that you should be able to travel freely between any other country without having to show your passport, which of course is a farce by itself.
And it's kind of funny when you're driving around and you go from country to country and you see the old booths are still there so you feel like you're in Russia or something.
The abandoned booths...
Right, but when you come in to Gitmo Nation East in the UK, there's passport because they didn't sign on to the Schengen Agreement.
And I used to fly from...
From the UK to Belgium.
And I had to go through passport control.
And I said, yeah, Schengen agreement.
You know who I am?
I come here like twice a month.
Yeah, Schengen accord, whatever.
So this has been kind of like the secret mechanism to close up the borders.
And I'm not sure where France stands on this.
But just when we thought it was going to be the climate change refugees, it turns out it's another form of refugees and they're going to keep them out.
I forgot about the climate change refugees.
I should mention that there had been a...
We have this globalization thing going on and this open borders.
Really?
This is not a new phenomenon.
This was attempted.
Anyone who's read their history knows that around the 1900s until...
About 1920.
The passports were pretty much eliminated.
You could go anywhere you wanted, pretty much anywhere in the world because there was a globalism situation taking place, much the same as we're having today, that was creating this kind of one world, no borders situation.
And you could go all over Europe without a passport.
Passports were very unknown.
It's when World War I broke out.
Yeah.
Which, by the way, was caused by, you know, it was partially, if you start looking at it, you'll see that one of the reasons it even happened to begin with is because of no border control.
These guys are just roaming around crazy and can shoot anybody they wanted in any country.
And then, all of a sudden, the clampdown began again, and passports and borders and all these things were established after World War I. But...
It's not a new phenomenon.
This has happened before, and every time it happens, it never works.
No, it is bad.
It's bad for the environment.
It's bad for climate disruption.
It's very bad for climate disruption.
But if I was one of these refugees from Tunisia, heck, I'd head to France too.
That's the best place.
I mean, why not?
Yeah, France is groovy.
It's rocking.
If I'd rather be out there, I was a bum.
You've got to go to Lyon.
That's where it's all happening.
That's where it's great.
As our two members, two listeners from France send us all the time.
We're dying over here.
They literally said, we're dying over here.
I just got to run around some quick news stories I just want to mention because they're all in the show notes.
Really outstanding show notes.
A lot of this is produced by the producers who are posting great stories from all around Gitmo Nation, noagendanewsnetwork.com.
If you want to be a contributor...
Just drop me an email.
Adam at Curry dot com.
Put in the subject line.
Noage in the News Network.
Or N-A-N-N is our hashtag.
And we're really getting some outstanding stuff.
Too much to even cover in the two shows we do a week.
The First Lady now has 26 servants working for her.
She needs one for every toenail and fingernail.
And what?
What are the other six for?
It's outrageous.
And this is from the Canadian Free Press.
Yeah, total cost of $1.75 million a year.
I mean, do you care to know who all the 26 are?
Really?
We've got the Chief of Staff, we've got the Deputy Assistant for Policy and Projects, Special Assistant Social Secretary, Special Assistant Director of Communications, Special Assistant Chief of Staff, Deputy Chief of Staff to the First Lady.
Director and Press Secretary to the First Lady.
Director of Scheduling and Advance.
Advance?
I've already heard three redundancies.
Trooper.
Deputy Director of Policy and Projects.
Deputy Director and Deputy Social Secretary.
Deputy Director, Deputy Social Secretary.
Two of those.
Deputy Director of Scheduling and Events Coordinator.
Deputy Director of Advance and Trip Director.
Special Assistant and Personal Aid.
Associate Director and Deputy Press Secretary.
That's all to the First Lady, by the way.
Special Assistant for Scheduling and Traveling Aid.
Associate Director of Correspondence.
I've opened the letter, Michelle!
Deputy Associate Director Social Office.
Executive Assistant to the Chief of Staff.
How big is that business card, like the side of one of those phony checks?
Staff assistant to the social secretary, staff assistant, deputy associate director of correspondence.
It just goes on and on.
This is crazy.
Jeez.
Yeah.
Well, it's just another waste of the taxpayers' money.
We've got nothing else to do.
By the way, that $1.7 million, we could use that money for the potholes out here on Highway 80.
Oh, it's not much better in Europe, by the way.
The members of the European Parliament have voted down three key cost-cutting measures because, of course, you know, we have Greece in austerity measures where the Prime Minister or the Minister of Finance actually come out and said the ratings agencies now are running the country, telling us to shut up.
They're going to default on their $50 billion loan.
So they're selling off assets.
They're selling islands to bankers.
I mean, it's complete disarray.
So there were three budget-cutting measures that were rejected by the members of European Parliament.
Number one, that they should fly economy class for journeys shorter than four hours instead of business or first.
Oh, we can't have that!
So they voted that one down.
They rejected an amendment which recommended savings should start with its own members and they should not have salary increases for their 2012 compensation.
Oh, we can't have that!
We have to have enough money!
And a third amendment which stated ministers of European Parliament, members of European Parliament, should not be paid for both being in the Parliament and traveling to or from it.
So they basically get paid the minute they leave their house, like you're in, as if they're already there.
And they, oh, we can't have that, we need to have our money.
So, you know, these are elitist, undemocratically voted people who are just taking your money, Europe.
I think I'm melting down, John.
I think it's...
I think we're done.
Yeah.
Although, one more little pre-cry.
There's so much more.
Does your baby cry too much at night?
It might be a sign of future behavior problems.
Or Alzheimer's.
Yes.
So you can start getting your pre-medication right away.
Yeah, I'm done, man.
I'm dizzy.
I'm absolutely dizzy.
I'm falling down dizzy.
It's like not okay.
Coming up on the stream, right after this program, we have an interview with Podsafe Music Sensation from NoAgendaRecords.com, Jasper Avenue.
Interviewed by Mr.
Oil, which would be a Tower of Babel not to be missed.
I can't wait to hear it.
It's going to be great.
No, it's all of his music and an interview with Jasper Avenue.
So it's cool to see stuff on the stream expanding, all part of what we deliver here as the No Agenda package.
I am falling down right now in Gitmo Nation West, the People's Republic of Southern California, at a fever of 103.
I'm Adam Curry.
Sounds good.
So I don't have a fever.
I'm just watching the water splash against the shoreline here in northern Silicon Valley.