WOMEN: DEFY FEMINISM. Feminism was a communist trick to get you to pay taxes
This week, professional armed car wash operator Kurt Schlichter takes on Tony and gets the MDC treatment. Also, a customer takes on Alex and gets the "get a load of this guy" treatment. Plus, right wing tears over banished Charlottesville monuments and 30 easy tricks to defeating The Great Reset. Support the show at http://patreon.com/miniondeathcult and get a bonus episode every week, as well as access to Last Responders, Tony's new Patreon-only podcast on the amazing 9-1-1 and 9-1-1: Lone Star TV series. Music: Unwound - You Bite My Tongue
The liberals are destroying California, and conservative humor gone awry... Conservative humor gone awry is going to fascistphonia today, so stay tuned.
We're going to take a few pictures of the desert and how their policies are actually messing it up.
It's not beautiful when you go across that border.
Stay tuned guys, we'll show you exactly what it looks like when people are going to get yourself.
Oh, they're in Bartholstein.
Stay tuned.
I'm Alexander Edward.
And I'm Tony Boswell.
We are Minion Death Cult.
The world is ending.
Excuse me.
The world is resetting.
Psychic vampires are responsible.
We're documenting it.
What's up, everybody?
It's your show for the week.
It's Minion Death Cult.
Thanks so much for tuning in.
If you like the show, you can support us at patreon.com slash MinionDeathCult, P-A-T-R-E-O-N dot com slash MinionDeathCult, where every week you will get a bonus full format episode of Minion Death Cult.
And every other week, you will get access to Tony Boswell's brand new podcast, Last Responders, Which is, it's an episode about the show 9-1-1, both the original and the 9-1-1 Lone Star spinoff that we talked about on this show.
It's a fucking amazing show.
It's a very funny podcast.
Some people are saying like, oh, you know, I don't have time to watch a new show.
I don't watch that show, guys.
It's just funny to hear Tony talk about the, like, liberal insanity trying to woke-ify the fire department and police.
It's amazing.
Yeah, it's a really, really good time.
This particular week is a really important episode.
Maria Guido comes on to speak about kind of an origin story of my favorite, least favorite character, Buck.
Give you a little background on our man, Buck.
Our crybaby, sweet, sweet boy, Buck.
Please listen to it.
You need to listen to this episode so you understand A lot of my feelings towards young, handsome Buck, who's a very important character.
Yeah, this episode's called Heartbreakers.
A little insight there.
It's gonna be a good one.
Okay yeah so go to patreon.com slash minion death call you get instant instant access to that episode which is dropping today uh you'll also get instant access to all the previous bonus episodes we've been doing for like two years so you get hundreds of hours of content immediately at your fingertips at your ear tips Whole lotta heat, whole lotta heat.
We do have a show to get to today, and we don't wanna run too long, because Tony remembered he had a concert to go to at the last second today.
Yep, yep.
No, I remembered I had to go to the concert the whole time.
I just thought it was tomorrow for a long time, to the point where I even hired a babysitter and stuff, and I never do that.
You get tomorrow and today confused a lot.
Pretty regularly, yeah.
My brain, you know?
Because I don't have the 40-hour work week anymore to lean on to know what day it is, I just don't know what's happening anymore.
To be fair, they're close together.
They're like two of the closest together.
I mean, if you were going to mistake a day for another day, tomorrow and today, they're right there, you know?
Yeah.
Luckily, I can always tell you about yesterday, though.
I mean, in history, over in Asia, if a butterfly flaps its wings, tomorrow and today could switch places.
That's how close together they are.
Just a subtle breeze.
That's so true.
You had a fun weekend, though, on the internet, Tony.
I did.
You want to tell us about it?
I did have a fun weekend on the internet.
I live in the Inland Empire, and for some reason, a couple of assholes decided they were doing an America tour.
And they were going to pick, of all places, Riverside to do their rally.
And I'm talking about Marjorie Taylor Greene and Matt Greasy Greasy Geiss.
Is it Geiss?
It's Gates.
It's Gates?
Yeah.
Matt Pedogates.
Matt Pedo Gates were having their rally in Riverside because they were just they were chased out of Orange County.
Republican stronghold Orange County said, "No, we're not hosting your thing." And so they said, "Cool, we're going to go to Riverside and use the Riverside Convention Center." And, you know, the local people here said no.
I shared a flyer that was made by a comrade and maybe I wouldn't have picked the exact verbiage because I knew exactly what was going to happen when I saw it.
The flyer says no fascists in Riverside.
And I posted it with, you know, where to be, when it's going to happen.
And then we talked about who to call to get this, you know, get this stopped.
And boy, oh boy, did that blow up.
I got a couple quote tweets that put me on the radar to some like right wing chuds.
I think one of my favorite ones was from this guy.
He has like 400 and something thousand followers, right?
And I didn't understand what his deal was, and apparently he used to run a- an armed car wash, whatever the fuck that means.
Um, so that brought a bunch of trust in my- my, uh- You gotta say his name.
His name was Kurt Schlichter.
People know who Kurt Schlichter is.
Kurt was Kurt Schlichter.
Kurt Schlichter fucking quote-tweeted Tony and was like, GET THIS COMMIE BASTARD!
Yeah, they were like, oh, the real fascists are showing what fascism is, which was everybody's comment.
But I did get a couple gems, some really mini death cult stuff.
I did get a response from someone named Lynn Mackey, who just hit me with the, oh, you're the real fascists, you're doing fascism by censoring us.
And of course, I clicked on her profile, and her pinned tweet is a survey that says, do you think we are heading for a civil war?
What did she think?
What did she think, Tony?
The options were yes, no, and the third option was yes, because Biden is dumb.
And that won by a landslide.
So you got some actual options there.
Well, not really options.
It got four votes.
The obvious choice.
It got 4 votes and it was 50% Biden is dumb, 25% yes, 25% no.
One of my other favorite ones was someone I thought it was a joke until I clicked on their profile and then realized they really were like about it and they were trying to make fun of me.
Kamala Hearst asked, what is quote pitted and why are blacks quote getting it?
And unfortunately, my friend screen grabbed it for me and sent it to me.
Thank you so much, Katie.
But I totally missed that and it was gone by the time I got back to it.
That one really made me happy.
And then everyone's trying to own me for being black.
One person, heybooboo16 replied with, you black?
Here's your boy.
And it's a video of Biden being an asshole.
Yeah, that's really cool.
Hey, you're black, right?
Here's that guy you voted for being a jerk to black people and stereotyping black people as a black and this being your guy because you're black.
How does that make you feel, blackie?
It's so funny because like if you just click on my profile at all and scroll at all, it's pretty clear that I don't fuck with that.
But yeah, it was great to have.
That's all they have.
That's all they have is like, well, oh, you think Trump's bad?
Well, you voted for Biden.
That's all they have.
Exactly.
And it's like, no, idiot.
I voted for Kamala Harris.
I tweeted out.
I wrote in Kamala Harris.
I wrote that.
I didn't even write in for Vice.
I just wanted her for both.
But it was pretty cool having The most Minion Death Cult characters come to our backyard and to know that when they were tweeting about how BLM commie scum is chasing them out of town, they were talking about me.
That felt nice.
They did end up having a small rally in front of City Hall.
But they did the way you're supposed to do it, where you don't ask for permission, you just show up with some megaphones.
And there was probably like a hundred people there.
It was pretty low-key, pretty lame.
But yeah, it was wonderful having that just show up on our doorstep.
The whole armed car wash thing, like I don't- Wait, what is that?
Does that mean that he was an operator at a car wash and he was armed?
Yeah.
Or does it mean like the car wash had some sort of automated turret system that would, you know, gun down anybody who was at the vacuuming station for longer than five minutes?
I think both.
And I think everybody who was also trying the cars open carried.
I mean, some of those, when you're trying to open up the tin of air freshener or whatever, that can be hard.
You might want somebody with a multi-tool there to help you out.
That is a good business plan, though.
Imagine one of those drive-thru bikini barista things, but it's... It's just cool guys.
It's just cool guys with tactical gear.
Yeah, just doing the most EEC, and you get to compare and contrast them.
You get to check them out.
They're like leaning over and the clips are like rubbing on the windshield.
The clips on their chest plate are like rubbing against the windshield getting all sudsy.
But that's okay though, because they specialize in doing overlanding vehicles, so most of that's painted in a pretty durable paint, so they can rub their guns on the paint still.
It's fine.
Just make sure, when they've done a good job, to tip them with one shiny challenge coin.
Job well done, sir.
Yep, yep, exactly.
That actually gets it.
When you collect a few of those, you get a free car wash.
Oh, wow.
So they don't get free car washes just because they work there.
That's... No, no.
That's fair, yeah.
You gotta earn it.
You gotta listen to the boss.
It's the boss's rules.
Yeah, my weekend was fun.
I filed three 9-5 grievances against my employer.
Hell yeah!
I did it at the FedEx office storefront.
Oh, sick burn.
Yeah.
Wow.
I hope they know that.
Will they know that?
Actually, I faxed them into my local's office, my Teamster's office, so I'm hoping they don't.
No, I'm just kidding.
But, yeah, no, again, like, you know, maybe people are sick of hearing it, but I got a fun story about how fucked up my work weeks have been.
There was a guy, it's this house, so we do, like, Amazon returns pretty frequently, and the way that works is I bring the return label to somewhere, and they give me the package, and I just accept the package and, you know, give them their little receipt at the bottom of the return label.
There's this guy on the route I've been doing, Gets one of these, like, every day.
I don't know what he's doing.
I don't know if he's just, you know, playing Russian roulette on his Amazon app or whatever.
But he returns, like, two or three things every day.
And so if they don't answer the door, I just leave the label.
And he, like, sometimes he'll save them up and then give them all to me at once, you know?
And I'm just like, okay.
I hate this person.
And the first interaction I had with him was just...
I didn't think it could get worse.
It did get worse.
But the first interaction was pretty painful.
He was like, OK, I have a lot for you to give back.
And I was like, OK.
He's all, do you have a cart or something?
And I was like, thanks for reminding me that somebody took my hand truck out of my car this morning.
Oh man, that sucks.
So no, I don't have one.
Just give me your fucking packages, dude.
So he starts giving me packages, like setting the packages down, and he's like, okay, I have all these return labels.
I had like four return labels too.
And he was like, okay, see, I've written the reference number on this box, on the boxes, right?
And I'm like, cool, that's cool.
Like, you seem like a really anal guy, but it, like, works in my favor in this instance, because you at least know that.
So he's all, see, it says 8567 on this one.
I was like, yep, yep.
And then he picked up the next one.
He's all, okay, see here, see, it says 5379.
I'm like, yep, I see him.
I get that.
I'm gonna figure this out, bud.
I get what you're doing.
You can go away now, you know, and he did that for every single one.
Ooh, and how many were thereabouts?
There was like eight total.
Oh my god.
And three of them already had return labels and he once again like gestured like Vanna White to the pre-existing return label, you know, just like, yep.
So I took all those, right?
Well, last week, it was like 8 p.m.
I was sort of on the last 10 or 12 stops of my night, and I go to pick up the package, and it's those plastic cutting boards, you know?
It's like a stack of three of them, whatever composite cutting boards they are.
And all that they're packaged in is the thin sort of saran wrap that you would get them in at like a Target or something, right?
The really flimsy stuff.
Yeah, it's like stretchy.
Like you could rip it just by shifting the contents, you know?
And so I'm like, oh, I can't take it like that.
It's got to be, you know, in a package or something.
And he goes, he starts, he says, oh, well, this is the way they And then he realizes he's talking to me, the person who likely delivered them, and he can't lie to me and tell me that they came like this.
Yeah, yeah.
And he was like, okay, well, uh, let me, let me go get a box real quick.
And I was like, no, I can't, I can't wait.
Like you're going to have tomorrow.
This is, this is next day, bud.
I w and he was like, uh, uh, okay, fine.
I'm like, all right, thanks.
Bye.
You know, again, 8 p.m.
8 p.m.
I've already done 200 stops.
I don't want to wait for you to fucking package up your package that should have been packaged already.
Yeah, that's awful.
Yeah, so I'm not the- You don't have a life, bro!
I'm not the gift wrap station at Macy's, buddy.
So, I come back the next day, and this is the funniest part, is I'm on the phone with Ani.
And I'm like, oh, I fucking hate this guy.
He's so annoying.
And she's still on the phone with me.
And he's like, oh, hey, I have a package.
He's got he's got a British accent, by the way.
He's got like a posh British accent.
So he's like, oh, I have a package.
Can you take it?
You know, and I'm like, yeah, I can take it.
We do this every fucking day.
You know, and he's like, oh, OK, well, you're a lot nicer than the bloke yesterday.
And I looked at him and I was like, I am the bloke from yesterday.
You're not a forgettable person!
You are somebody who, if you meet you, you will probably remember you.
I was like wearing sunglasses on one day and then not sunglasses on the other day.
But I've seen this guy like three or four times.
Yeah!
That's great.
He's also, quick aside, he's also got a sensor at his door where before you even push the doorbell, if your hand crosses like an invisible laser, a fucking voice says, Hi, can I help you?
To scare off burglars.
Do you say anything back?
It's an automated robot voice.
That's wild.
That's so funny.
Psycho people.
Do they think that works?
It's going to maybe scare a cat.
People are going to walk by and do it on purpose because it's funny.
That's the only thing I can think of.
After I said I was, in fact, the bloke from, you know, Heisenberg breaking bad voice, I am the bloke from yesterday!
After I say that, he was like, oh, okay, well, yeah, I mean, you just, you seemed a little short yesterday.
And I'm like, yeah, because it was 8pm.
I was like, I said, it's nothing personal.
It was just 8 PM.
I have 200 deliveries to do.
They need to be packaged.
And it's like, again, it's this sort of like privileged position that I'm in where I don't actually have to snap at a customer because I can just flat out tell them what the score is.
And it doesn't like really emotionally involve me because I never feel helpless.
You know what I mean?
So I can just walk away from this guy if I don't like him, you know?
I was just like, it's nothing personal.
It just has to be in a box.
Your package has to be securely wrapped.
I'm not going to take your shitty package and have it fall apart on the belt and then somehow get, like, blamed for losing your package or something like that.
It's not gonna happen.
People try to hand me open boxes all the time and I'm like, okay, cool, so you want me to have this stuff?
Is that why you're giving it to me?
Yeah.
You know, uh, don't you want your refund?
Don't you want this stuff to get there?
But... So...
He goes, so just like, just any box?
And I'm like, any box, man?
And he like walks out to his curb to follow me, and he's like, what about this?
And it was like a, what are you, broken down box?
Like a flattened box that was on his recycling?
And I was like, yeah man, that's a box.
You can for sure use that, because it's a box.
Fine, if it fits, if it fits, it gets to where it's going.
He was like, Oh, okay.
All right.
All right.
I'll have it tomorrow.
But yeah, again, the moral of the story is be in a union so that you can file overtime, overtime grievances and get paid overtime again for all the overtime you worked.
Hell yeah.
Yeah.
And you know, definitely deserve that.
That's 8 PM.
So what, you were, you were what?
You were like about, you were about 12 hours that day?
Yeah I did like 12 to 13 hours almost every day in the last two weeks and then the week before that I had like three days of 11 to 12 hours.
Jesus.
So I like sat down I you know I got my like I got my uh my accountant's visor on I turned on the desk lamp and I sat down and I marked down all my hours you know the way my grandpa taught me to uh on the uh On the grievance form.
And I did a little graph so I could- I broke it into three separate weeks, so I only had to do one fax, you know?
Nice.
Nice.
That's- that's brutal.
Your boy's getting paid.
I'm gonna make about a week's worth of- a week's worth of money for that grievance.
Hell fucking- yeah.
Hell yeah, that rules.
That's- that's- that's so funny.
That- that sucks.
That sucks, but I'm happy you're getting paid for it.
Yeah, thank you.
Appreciate that.
If you want to hear another funny work story, a classic work story, really, one that I had been meaning to call in and tell Street Fight for, like, years now, yeah, listen to the call-in show on Street Fight Radio from last week.
You'll hear me tell the story of the time a customer called dispatch to complain about the way I was standing.
Yes, that's awesome.
I haven't listened to that yet.
Yeah, I'm excited about that.
That's a good episode in general.
Worthless.
Those are long, but they're good.
They get a lot of good calls on there.
They're so good.
Yeah, they're so good.
Yeah, alright.
Onto the show proper.
I feel like it's gonna be a little less structured.
Is that okay with you?
Is it okay with you, Tony, if we have just like a little fun?
You know, I'm gonna make do, okay?
That's what I'm gonna say.
I might file a grievance.
I might file a grievance later.
I think, do I file that grievance for you to Street Fight?
Yeah, the Street Fight are our bosses.
Yeah, so you would go... You'd file it with them.
I'll file a grievance to them, yeah.
Just got kind of a loosey-goosey couple topics here that I thought would be fun to talk about.
One being the fact that the city of Charlottesville is removing, and has removed, Confederate statues.
Charlottesville, of course, the site of the famous neo-Nazi protest, the Unite the Right rally that Trump complimented.
And that Comrade Heather Heyer gave her life in counter-protest to.
They are just taking those statues out now.
And it really would not have happened without the actual efforts of all the people in that community.
It's a nice thing.
You know, we don't have a lot of nice things to celebrate now.
I think that's one of them.
It's a good thing.
You know, it's symbolic, but it's also just a good thing not to have those fucking awful, ugly statues in their town anymore.
Yeah, it's fantastic.
I think we should melt them down and turn them into hammers.
Um, if that wasn't enough for you, if just the fact that taking these statues down wasn't enough to, like, tickle you pink, uh, we do have some responses here that, I don't know, they might do something for you.
Yeah, because I'm guessing people weren't universally pumped on this, as we know.
Well, not in the Como News comment section.
People are probably universally mad about it in the Como News.
Yeah.
Como News is a Seattle news outlet that's pretty awful.
We've covered them before.
They're the ones that had that interview with the cop, the female cop during the Seattle protests and uprising, who she stepped off a curb wrong and tore her meniscus.
And so they interviewed her sitting down in her full police uniform.
Yeah, because she was one of the people that was, like, grievously injured during the protest.
Yeah, she was the worst injury on the cop's side.
Yeah, that was great.
Yeah, so this is their comment section.
Adam Vu says, I'm angry.
So Adam Vu has the Marines insignia, this, like, Marines seal, I think, as his avatar.
Be careful, we don't want to mess no devil dogs.
Uh, he says, I'm angry.
Spent a significant chunk of my life there.
Lived, slash studied, slash partied, slash attended football and basketball games.
Oh, weren't cool enough to be on the teams, I guess?
Uh, dot dot dot.
Took my- Took my class ring off last year, thinking about sending my diploma back.
You should burn that shit, dude.
I can't believe you still have your diploma from Charlottesville, from University of North Carolina, or wherever the fuck you went.
I can't believe you fucking haven't wiped your ass with that diploma.
You should break the frame that it's hanging on, you know, your wall inside of, and scrub your ass with it.
It'll probably be the first time you've touched it in years.
I like to think that he just hung it upside down.
Just displayed, but upside down.
Yeah, but little does he know that was actually the most holy way to hang the diploma.
All these edgelords got it wrong.
St.
Paul actually requested that his diploma be hung upside down so that he would suffer even more than Jesus' diploma did.
Yeah, yeah, that's the most righteous.
I don't know, St.
Peter, St.
Paul, I can't remember who it was.
Yeah, it was Peter, I believe, who was hung upside down.
The upside-down, people have to remember this, the upside-down cross is very cool on the face of it, until you remember it was like, the upside-down cross is like to be even more religious.
It's to be even like... Yeah, exactly.
Although, it seems kind of like a prideful move, to be like, oh, you think Jesus suffered?
Watch this shit.
It's audacious.
It's a bit bold, yeah?
Would you fool yourself a little too big for your bitches there?
Somebody's probably going to DM me and be like, actually, if they hang upside down, they die quicker because all the blood like rushes out faster or something like that.
So maybe it's maybe you were going for like pride.
And that's kind of the best move to do then be like, also, you know what I read on?
I read on what do you call it?
Like, what are some of those what are some of those clickbaity websites?
BuzzFeed?
Okay.
I mean, that's kind of a basic example.
Viral Nova.
I read on Viral Nova.
That being hung upside down on a cross was the most painful way, and so then I told them to do that, but little do they know, I actually also read I Fucking Love Science, and they debunked that.
But see, people don't like science in this country anymore.
They don't believe in it.
Nope, nope.
They don't know.
So I sound cooler and tougher than Christ, but actually, if you would have read I Fucking Love Science, you would know that I was just doing it to die sooner.
Yeah.
The thing about him is he can switch 360 flip, but he can't actually regular 360 flip.
He's one of those weirdos that can only do it switch, you know?
That's weird.
That's a weird thing.
Switch crucifixion?
Yeah.
Switch tricks are like the left-handedness of skateboarding.
All those people are evil.
We need to force them to do tricks the right way.
Stick them in some sort of boarding school.
Make them do frontside flips only.
Yeah, exactly.
Gotta keep it straight.
Let's stick to fundamentals here.
You're turning your back on the Lord every time you do a backside 50-50.
Yeah, nice switch flip.
How's your kick turn?
I think it's very funny.
Yeah, he took his class ring off last year because they took down one Confederate statue last year or something.
And the school did it though?
It's the school that did it?
I guess, I don't know.
I think it's probably not the school, it's probably the state.
I think on Charlottesville, the Unite the Right rally, I think that was on a campus.
If I'm remembering correctly.
I don't know if it's a school statue or a public statue, but either way, you're real silly for feeling that way, my man.
Well, I mean, it's kind of like...
I think they did this guy a favor, wearing your class ring.
Yeah.
Sorry.
Cringe.
Don't wear your class ring, everybody.
Don't do that.
It's fine.
Yeah, you don't gotta do that.
I, like, wanted a class ring when I was in senior year, even though I hated high school.
I just kind of thought, like, oh, rings are cool, you know?
Rings are cool, yeah.
This is a reason to have one.
I was looking at them and none of them were cool.
No, not even close.
You'd think mine would've been cool because I went to a quote, harder school, you know?
But they don't appeal to that.
I would've liked to have gotten a swap meet ring that also said I graduated from high school, but it was from a swap meet.
At your high school, they probably gave you a voucher to go to Carousel Mall and pick out a $100 ring.
It's not even ring, it's like the ring or the value of the ring.
So just kids, we just got chains.
Everyone who graduated showed up with chains.
Yeah, you can actually get ring product.
It's good for $50 of ring product.
of Ring products.
Ring material.
They did that, man.
They used to give us a turkey for Thanksgiving and a turkey for Christmas or ham for Christmas, vice versa.
And then they stopped that.
They eventually started giving us a $15 gift card slash voucher.
It was a voucher for turkey products.
Yeah, at like Walmart or whatever.
So you could just get deli slices?
Yeah, that's all I got.
I was just like, alright, I'll make sandwiches for a week.
And it sucks that you're making sandwiches for work, like, it's like, you know?
And then they stopped giving us anything at all.
Bullshit.
Vegan pie ruined that one for ya.
Yeah, it was probably them.
I really wish they were still giving turkeys out because dudes that I worked with back in California, they would talk about barbecuing turkey, like with those turkeys.
They would barbecue, have like a cookout and barbecue them.
And I was like, that sounds so fucking good.
Yeah, because you get to experiment.
You get to experiment with a free turkey.
Yeah.
You get to kind of risk it a little bit.
Everybody I talked to said barbecued turkey was fucking delicious.
And it sounds really good.
I want to do that sometime.
Burn tips are fine if they're free.
Uh, so yeah, took my class ring off last year.
Oh no- Did you throw it against the wall?
Dramatically?
Uh, laugh all you want- Did you melt it down into a bullet?
Fired it into a red coat, aka college student.
Laugh all you want, leftists.
Nobody's exempted from socialist, communist, brand of justice, even hardcore believers.
Ask any North Korean.
Oh wait, you can't because they're all dead.
They killed them all.
Sorry.
Yeah, you can't talk to ghosts.
You have to do a sandwich for this one.
So it's funny, when I first looked at this comment section, I saw Adam Vu's comment.
A different comment.
This is the one I read from Adam Vu first.
Which is a quote, totally separate comment, not a reply, nothing.
Just a separate comment down farther in the thread.
Adam Vu says, quote, first they came for the communists and I did not speak out because I was not a communist.
Then they came for the socialists, and I did not speak out because I was not a socialist.
Then they came for the trade unionists, and I did not speak out because I was not a trade unionist.
Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out because I was not a Jew.
Then they came for me, and there was no one left to speak out for me.
Martin Niemöller.
So I saw this comment.
I was like, okay, cool.
Like, uh, there's a Marine in here who's doing, like, Like anti-Nazi, pro-left.
You would think!
Commentary on this.
Sick.
Good representation.
Nope.
I think he thinks that the Confederate slave owners were communists.
And hey, you think you're getting rid of the statues of them?
Well, you're next, buddy.
But that does make sense because either you're a patriot or a communist, and being that they were going away from, like, you know, the American law and, like, the president and stuff, they were trying to be their own thing, that would have made them, you know, that would have made them communists.
So the logic is there, you know?
If you're really stupid.
It's so good.
If you're this kind of guy, you have to just be, like, a statue absolutist.
Because you don't want to let people believe you thought the Confederacy was good, or you think slave owners were heroes to be celebrated.
You can't acknowledge the actual context in which these statues were erected, which is, as most of us probably know, were done to terrorize black communities in the Jim Crow era, in the rise of the KKK era.
It was done to remind people.
In the 1900s, not back then.
Yeah, so you can't admit to, like, liking them if you're, I don't know, an educated person or if you're trying to get along in society, right?
You have to take this stand of just like, well, if you remove one statue, then you got to remove them all, baby.
What's next?
The Statue of Liberty, I bet.
I bet.
I bet they're going to pull that down.
Oh, wow.
I can picture a tugboat pulling the head down.
Wow.
You hate the statue of Jefferson Davis, yet you love the Venus de Milo?
Interesting.
Yes, I want to see someone take that thing.
It's not about taking down monuments, it's about erasing art.
You know, that'd be good.
One commentary, I don't think I had it anymore, but they were like, it's so sad, these beautiful statues.
Were people like, do people take pictures in front of them and shit still?
Is that like a thing, you know?
Not, I mean, if you're like flipping it off, yeah, that was like the most common picture in front of it at this point.
Michael M. Hawkins said, do you people know world history?
Do you know history?
Do you?
Do you know world history, Tony?
Well, I mean, clearly not if I'm over here trying to repeat it.
Countries were built by the strongest and they did what they had to do.
It's part of history.
Fuck off.
I say forget the past and change now for the future.
Leave our history alone.
That is what made America great.
If you don't like it, move to another country and see how far you get with this type of thinking.
So, a lot, a lot, a lot going on in this.
It's one of those things, too, where they're very close, because he is saying, this is what built this country.
And it's like, yeah, so now do the rest of that work in your mind.
No, what he's saying is strong men built this country by being fancy boys, you know?
But as I'm saying, you're acknowledging that this is what it's all built on, is quote strong men doing what they had to do, but what they had to do was have slaves.
Yeah, what they had to do was have other people do the work for them.
Yeah, it's like, so you're so, you understand, you're recognizing that this is a foundational thing, this is what was built on, but you don't want to do the second part, you know?
That's, yeah, countries were built by the strongest, yeah, so like, black people, African Americans, immigrant workers, literally the actual strong people.
Actual laborers.
I say forget the past and change now for the future.
Leave our history alone.
So forget the past by, no, don't touch it.
Leave it alone.
Leave it in the middle of town square and just forget about it.
The past is a lot like a baby bird, you know?
Don't touch it.
Mom will throw it out the nest.
Yeah, you're going to make it smell like SJW if you touch it.
And then nobody's going to want it.
No, it's going to smell like patchouli and shit.
Patchouli smells so good.
It smells so good.
I was at a place yesterday and at the same time a patchouli hit hit me and then like a really nice like rosin wax pen hit me at the same time.
I was like god I need that in a candle so bad.
It smelled so good.
Ani's got me on incense.
I was I was never an incense guy and she lights incense all the time and she's like oh yeah my favorite one's patchouli and I was like yeah dog.
Oh, that's weird.
And then I realized the one that I had been smelling the most was patchouli and I was like, oh yeah, it's delicious.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's very good.
It's very good.
You were just thinking of all the people who put way too much of it on and also were annoying people at the same time.
You know, which makes it worse.
Uh, yeah.
So I say, I say, forget, pay no mind to the slave owner in the center of the town.
You know, that, that sort of thing.
Leave our history alone.
Don't erase history, but just forget about it.
Don't erase it.
Just don't think about it.
Just don't look at it.
Just don't look at it.
And then also, that is what made America great.
This is another slip here, admitting that what makes America great is cheap-slash-free-slash-enslaved labor.
Yeah, which we're still seeing expressed today, every single day, with stories that you told us.
Things like the Frito-Lay actions right now.
Solidarity with the Frito-Lay strike.
Because holy shit, those conditions were nuts.
Twelve hour days, six, seven days a week.
People who'd worked there for years were, like, killing themselves, literally.
So, solidarity with Frito-Lay.
Don't buy any Frito-Lay products during the strike.
Yeah, this whole country right now is conditioned to think that having, you know, cheap snacks delivered to your door the next day is the way we're supposed to live.
And it's creating, you know, it's just perpetuating horrendous labor and working conditions just to maintain what we consider normality.
Melvin Neefert says, our founding fathers did it with British monuments.
Now we have forgotten what happened.
What?
No.
No, there were no British monuments in America, right?
That's not a thing.
Did they come over to America and find the British monuments that already existed and knock them over and say, now it's ours?
I don't know.
I don't know what this comment is.
It's so weird.
I mean, and we can't know because it's been forgot.
We forgot about it.
If there ever were monuments, we knocked them down, and we forgot about it.
And that's what happens, Tony.
What if people later are trying to talk about slavery on a shitposting dumbass guy podcast, and they can't remember if there ever was slavery because we knocked down all the Confederate statues?
Yeah, there's no proof of it.
You know, I bet you this guy did what a lot of people do, where they confuse British monuments with indigenous people.
Mm-hmm.
You know?
I understand the slip-up.
Yeah, they saw those rocks, they saw the grandfathers, and they were like, those are probably British.
Yeah, those have got to be British, yeah.
Or is he just thinking about the Tea Party?
Is that a Tea Party reference?
They were probably some fucking dumbass statues that were like, here's King George's face on this thing, or whatever, you know?
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, really, like, It's kind of a different story also, like, being taxed as a colony, as a bunch of wealthy landowners with, you know, already very wealthy, already have titles, and then also access to, quote, free land, you know, that you're just gonna do genocide, and that's all you have to do to get it, really.
The idea that they were under the same sort of oppression that, like, people who were literally owned and kept in chattel slavery were under, Not the greatest comparison.
Having a statue of King- No, it's a miss.
You could, like, have a statue of King George around just to throw shit at all day because there was actually- there wasn't that much oppression.
No, exactly.
Try to have been in the South, have the statue of, you know, whoever, some Confederate general used as target practice by all the citizens every time they walked by.
Like, that's not- What the statue was there for.
The statue was like, yeah, again, like a sharp reminder of your position in society.
Again, that was put up there.
People are alive today that were alive when that was put up.
When those, when those statues are put up, that's kind of says enough for me.
Yeah.
Um, so yeah, we'll just have those people tell us the history.
Those people can remember the history for us, essentially.
Please.
Keep on the tradition of, you know, of telling stories.
Uh, but yeah, our founding fathers did it with British monuments.
Now we have forgotten what happened.
So like, assuming there were British, you know, there were statues of like the fucking monarchy or parliament or something, uh, in, in, you know, your, uh, uh, Salem, Massachusetts town square or whatever, assuming there, they were there and, and they were also torn down.
The argument is that like the British are going to take over again now.
Look what's happening, Tony.
Look what's happening at this very moment.
Thousands of American TVs are tuned to that one show about the royal family.
Yeah, the Royals, sure.
But also, the result of what they're saying this, you know, toppling of British monuments, I think they're also saying that resulted in a war, right?
That resulted in like, you know, the Revolutionary War.
What are you saying is happening right now?
Are you, you know?
Maybe that is what he's saying.
Maybe he's, you know, doing Minion's Law here, predicting another revolution against the cultural Marxists or something like that.
Yeah.
I think it's more like maybe he's comparing being taxed without representation to what's happening now with Biden.
You know, just now with Biden, it's like we have no representation as the segment of the country that is currently overrepresented among any other demographic politically or ethnically or gender-wise.
But the taxation is the removal of the statute because that's yours.
Like you're getting property taken from you because you feel like part of that.
That is part of you.
You didn't approve for it to be taken down.
They didn't ask you.
So you are getting taxed for that representation, you know?
How come my state, the federal senators from my state are worth only 17 of the California's federal senators?
That's not fair.
It should be worth 50 of those guys.
We're so much more real than they are over there.
Yeah, it's uh, we gotta get those numbers up, folks.
We gotta get people to represent us so we can stop getting our statues taken down.
We need fair representation, by which I mean more representation for states with the state fairs.
So stupid.
Uh, finally, um, Goldie Garcia says, so sad, dot dot dot, there goes our history and our future!
What do you mean future?
You fucking weirdo.
What are you talking about?
Yeah, kind of hard to imagine a future without Jefferson Davis.
Isn't it, Tony?
So weird.
So stupid.
Yeah, right?
God, I hate it.
Keeps going.
Why is this happening?
Dot, dot, dot.
Our country, quote, use, end quote, to be great.
Crying face emoji, like, cute uwu, shiny eye, hopeful emoji, and then, uh, like, wailing.
Mouth downturned wailing emoji.
It's like the- it's such an easy rebuttal.
It's like, great for who, motherfucker?
Who you talking- who was it great for, dog?
Like, fuck you!
It was great for Goldie.
It was great for Goldie.
I want to hear Goldie's stories.
She's like, you think it was easy for me?
It was way easier for my grandparents!
Yeah.
Our country, quote, use to be great.
And yeah, that's I think that sums it up for this.
You know, it's just it's so sad.
We're all so sad for the Confederate monuments to go.
Our country used to be great and used to love.
We used to fucking love history in this country.
And now just we don't we don't anymore.
Do they forget that we have like slave owners carving to the side of a mountain?
Uh, no, because they're still there.
How could they forget them?
Like, that's one of the ones I really want done, but how do you, how do you, do you just blast it?
You know, I guess you do.
I would take a, I would take a, just a cave there instead.
You return it to the fucking tribes and let them do whatever they want.
Let them do it.
Yeah.
Hell yeah.
It's just going to be a tram where you could just pee on it.
It's going to be a tram that takes you up and you get to pee in their mouths and eyeballs.
Wow, that caused quite an infection for those giant men.
Okay, so yeah, the next thing I wanted to talk about here.
This was sent to us in the Minion Death Commandos Facebook group.
This was Graham Stewart.
So, thank you, Graham, for this wonderful content.
This is a meme.
It's a big one.
It's a doozy.
Are you ready, Tony?
I think so.
It's more of an infographic, really, than a meme.
And it's got so much info.
Top.
Text.
Like, big bar, you know, letting you know, like, a preview of what this meme is gonna be about.
You know, it's like the topic sentence.
It's the title of the meme.
It's your thesis statement.
And that is... Skull and Crossbones Emoji... 30 Ways to Defeat the Great Reset... Skull and Crossbones Emoji.
Um, so...
If you're not familiar with The Great Reset, uh... I thought it was like, uh... Uh, you know, a...
What do you call it?
Like an urban legend or a conspiracy theory?
And it is a conspiracy theory for sure, but there is something that's actually called the Great Reset, which is a plan by like the World Economic, uh, what a group, what are they called?
The Economic Forum, I think.
The World Economic Forum, uh, where they're going to, hey, they're going to get this whole capitalism thing back on track.
We're going to do a great reset of capitalism where we're going to empower small business owners and we're going to get more women on corporate boards and we're going to make sure that lean, efficient governments do things the right way.
It is 100% just like liberal reform, the same exact liberal reforms that even liberals haven't been able to get implemented in the last 30 years.
But even more neoliberal, even more with a nod to like Silicon Valley, with a nod to corporate leadership, that sort of thing.
In the guise of like, An earth-shaking revelation.
An earth-shaking shock to the system of capitalism that's actually gonna defeat global warming.
And it's actually gonna give everybody a fair shake.
A fair shot and a fair shake.
They're trying to, like, it's like the Great Society.
You know, it's like the...
What do you call it?
Like the FDR reforms.
They're trying to pose it like it's going to be that level, you know, inventing social security, that sort of thing.
It's not.
It's just like corporate restructuring of America and the economy that is already happening the way that they want to, but they're saying they want it to happen in a more progressive way and it'll just, it'll never happen that way anyway, so.
One thing I really like about that, you know, thinking about that is a couple things.
If they were to do that, say in America, you know, with the whole, with the FDR, with the Social Security thing, stuff like that, they would have to do it, to kind of like level the playing field, they would have to do it but offer that to everyone who's not a white man.
Because when that happened back then, we didn't get it.
So we didn't get to start businesses and start generational wealth back then.
And so now we have this thing where people talk about things like shopping small, shopping local, but you forget that the background of that, behind the scenes of that, is that small boutique, they're just buying fast fashion and it's a cop wife.
All this is just, like you said, it's just liberal babble that does not really help The whole thing?
Well, it's the system that's exploitative, and you can put more black people at the top of it, or more women at the top of it, but it's still a hierarchical system.
Oh yeah, no, absolutely.
I'm just saying, like, that's the thing I always think about when I think about when this stuff was built and how long ago we had those kind of handouts.
Not everyone got those handouts.
No, and it's, I mean, like a lot of, you know, historians and people doing material analysis are doing a great job at Sort of analyzing the decline or, you know, charting the inevitable decline of capitalism.
And it's like the reason it's been able to sustain itself for so long in America, it's because of the promise of free, quote, free land.
Like when we got here, it was just everybody could go out and be their own boss.
You could just go kick, you know, shoot some indigenous people and get them off, quote, your land or whatever.
And now you have property for free, right?
Yep.
Exactly.
And we did that for a long time and then there was no more free property because you ran out of free property.
So everybody who got in during that time, yeah sure they passed on their wealth to their successors or to their offspring and that sort of thing.
But there's an inevitable crunch that happens when there's no more free land and just the top starts sucking up from Both the bottom and the middle and the upper middle and it just all it goes to the top and so it's you can't fix these things by saying oh, we need to just shift around like the demographics of the people at the top because the system By the way, I was no way in actually advocating for that.
For sure.
Yeah.
Yeah, I want to make that very clear.
I wasn't actually advocating for that.
I was just citing a gross oversight that happens when these conversations happen.
For sure.
I just wanted to, like, explain why I think, you know, that this World Economic Forum plan of, like, making a more compassionate capitalism is just nonsense because the need for profit is too great at this point.
The corners, the bowl of America has been scraped, you know?
And that resin is going straight to the top, you know what I mean?
And it's just, there's nothing left under that this system can do to redistribute the wealth.
Like, because it's not what the system is meant, the system does redistribute wealth, but in the form of just, yeah, siphoning off your fucking blood and sweat straight to the top.
Yeah.
So it's just, yeah, it's smart capitalism.
It's like smart, compassionate capitalism is what the Great Reset is arguing for, like right here from their website.
There is an urgent need for global stakeholders to cooperate in simultaneously managing the direct consequences of the COVID-19 crisis.
To improve the state of the world, the World Economic Forum is starting the Great Reset Initiative.
Um yeah and so it is it is just like we need the the smartest brightest minds to come together and put party affiliation aside and do what's right for the world and it's there's just like you know I don't know at least five uh oxymorons contained within that that suggestion um so but this is the way We can defeat the Great Reset that I'm worried about here, Tony.
Not necessarily worried about, but that just won't help the planet at all.
Some enterprising individual has written down 30 ways to defeat the Great Reset.
Thank God.
Yeah, has become shorthand for the New World Order, right?
This is like...
What they're talking about, uh, when they talk about the Great Reset on the right wing.
It's much more popular on the right wing than it is, like, in centrist-lib circles or whatever.
I had only heard the Great Reset in the context of, you know, these conspiracy theorists or whatever.
Um... It's just, it just means the new world order.
And there's nothing new about this world order, again, where, like, the tech-technocrats are in charge, doing what's right for everybody.
That's the world order we have right now.
So...
Okay, number one of 30 ways to defeat the Great Reset.
Download and share Europa, The Last Battle.
That one seems pretty easy.
I mean, we're on a podcast right now, you know, thousands of listeners.
We don't even really have to download this thing.
We can just say, hey, you download it, you know, and that's our way of sharing it.
I think we just did a lot of work right now.
Number two.
WHITE COUPLES HAVE MORE WHITE CHILDREN!
Whoa!
Hold up!
Wait!
How is that a solution?
What is that a solution for again?
All you gotta do is watch this video and then if you're white, secure a future for your children.
Oh man, I mean, it's funny that we both have a similar agenda because I also think like, yeah, we should have more white children, but I'm not speaking for white people.
I'm saying that I think that we should make less white children by having white children like my mixed kids, you know?
Yeah.
White couples have more white children.
Love that.
Hey, I love matchmaking with the whole white race.
Hey, hey.
You know, I think she's into you, dude.
Why don't you go defeat the Great Reset over there, buddy?
Hey, you.
Hey, you.
You and you.
You guys should have a baby together because, you know.
You guys look similar.
Just, yeah, playing with my Adolf Hitler and Eva Braun action figures and, like, squishing them together.
Go have a baby!
And, yeah, just, or doing, like, the stereotypical, you know, like, Italian mom thing.
Like, oh, you guys, your couple is so cute.
Why don't you have the babies together?
Why don't you eliminate the lesser races and procreate, hmm?
Give me a little bambino.
Three.
No, you are not a slave.
You're the white couples, remember?
Yeah, so you're not a slave.
Yeah, that's a pretty easy one.
You are not property of service corporations.
You're only bound by consent or contract.
Oh my god, I just got this.
Watch the foundational knowledge videos at the website AwarriorCalls.com.
Search Christopher James and Anna Von Reitz.
I don't have time to look up who those losers are.
Um, I love this though.
You are not property of service corporations.
You're only bound by consent or contract.
I love this, which is like, you are not a slave.
You deserve to be treated better.
Did you know that you're entering into a voluntary contract?
And just leave.
If you don't like it, just leave that job.
Yeah, just bounce.
Just bounce.
It's easy.
Don't what you can survive if that happens?
Like I don't understand.
This is so dumb.
It's really dumb because it's like trying to do populist anti-corporate rhetoric but it's got libertarian brain all through this.
Like this is screaming Ron Paul at me the whole time.
So it can't really conflate that because libertarianism is like The ultimate, like, foundation of libertarianism is the idea of free association.
Which is, oh, you're free to associate with whoever you want.
You're free to get a job if you want to and don't get a job and starve and be shot down by the police for owing money to your landlord or whatever.
If you don't want to, right?
It's all just, you have the freedom of choice.
So it's funny to complain about how the corporations and the technocracy are ruling over you, treating you like a slave, but you're not a slave!
You're a human being, meaning, listen, if you don't like it, leave.
Yeah, which, I mean, we all know that.
We all know that, you know?
People quit jobs all the time.
You're not pointing anything out here special.
It's just so funny, though.
It's like...
It's, you think they're going for like the wage slavery argument.
I think they're talking about how like, oh, these people are controlling your lives.
They're paying you just enough to keep you alive to come into work the next day.
Uh, essentially all you can afford is, uh, food and not even shelter at this point, if you're on minimum wage.
Um, and, but he's saying, no, you're not a slave in the literal sense.
Like you should just leave.
Not that you shouldn't be treated like the slave you're being treated as.
It's just that, no, you're, you know, you know, uh, you don't actually have chains.
Yeah, exactly.
You're free to move around.
But how am I going to read about how to defeat the Great Reset if I don't have Facebook?
Man, people are missing this because they actually saw it before.
Don't do either of those things.
I don't know what BitChute is.
Don't do it.
Yeah, bad move.
None of this has anything to do with what they're talking about with, like, the recess.
Like, this is all just, like, protecting Western culture.
What the fuck?
Well, it's...
This is all just Marxism.
This is all just communism to them.
Critical race theory is communism.
Having a female CEO is communism.
Figuring out how Global food brands can maximize profits in a time of drought is communism to them, right?
Yeah.
So it's funny because these people can actually stop quote critical race theory from being taught in schools insofar as they can get like a law passed that says well you are not allowed to teach critical race theory in school meaning like which doesn't mean shit because there's not Like an actual definition to critical race, like you have to be more specific.
You have to be like, you're not allowed to mention slavery or you're not allowed to mention Jim Crow, which I don't think they've gotten that specific in these laws that are being passed.
Uh, because they, again, that would give away the game.
If they said that sort of thing, like that would give away the game that they know that critical race theory is just a discussion of oppression throughout the years, which is part of any, almost any history class to one degree or another.
Right.
Yeah.
But they can still get those laws passed and feel like they've accomplished a defeat of critical race theory.
Because, like, critical race theory really, like, it doesn't threaten Kraft Foods.
Critical race theory doesn't threaten, you know, General Electric or Exxon Mobil or anything.
Neth is gonna be fine, yeah.
The idea that you could defeat corporate capitalist overlords with a flowchart where you meet up with your sheriff who's also probably a capitalist is so funny to me.
Yeah, it's really stupid.
It's a wild waste of time, but it's just, like I said, it's using this scare, this kind of vague scare of a global reset, to push something completely different, which is, you know, things like race science.
Yeah.
The next one's my favorite.
Number six, buy a gun!
I mean, sure.
You can shoot the reset.
Yeah, if you're just like a total crank and you're watching Europa The Last Battle, if you're borderline insane and you think like corporations are communists or whatever, yeah, buy a gun.
If you're like experiencing extreme mental health spirals on Facebook, yeah, buy a gun.
Buy a gun, oh my god, yeah, yeah, totally.
If you're just worried about the doom that is tomorrow, that is the reset, Probably a good idea.
stop wearing masks is number seven and taking PCR tests masks make you sick the tests are faulty slash toxic yeah again has nothing to do with what they're talking about nothing to do with this thing they're fearing at all number eight stop getting vaccinated they've never worked what what They've never worked?
This person's never seen a book.
Are you telling me you think vaccines work?
You think a vaccine has worked, Tony?
Fucking idiot.
I mean, oh, that's true.
I've never seen them work.
I got a vaccine and nothing happened.
You know, in order to see them work, you'd have to see them not work, too.
And I haven't seen anybody die from measles in a minute, so prove it.
Yeah, I don't know.
You can't prove my vaccine worked.
Prove that I was going to get coronavirus if I didn't take the vaccine, Tony.
Do that.
I'm pretty sure that all those diseases happen to go away at the same time and it's just pushed.
They know the disease is going away so they release the vaccine and make themselves look good.
Yeah, they're conflating correlation with causation.
Everyone knows this.
Oh yeah, if you think vaccines work, you probably also think vaccines cause world record runs scored by the L.A.
Dodgers.
Yeah.
Silly ass.
Yeah.
I got a hat to sell ya.
Actually I do think the one person who didn't hit like a home run that night is the guy that got coronavirus.
The one guy who like should have hit a home run but didn't.
Oh man.
It's probably the worst thing that's happened as a result of coronavirus.
That poor guy.
Yeah.
Um, question if viruses exist.
So, I mean, we don't even know if these things exist, period.
I've never, I've never seen it with my own eyes.
Yeah.
That company that makes the plushie diseases, I don't think they released a coronavirus.
They definitely have.
I don't know why I said that.
They definitely released one like a year ago.
Nevermind.
The only, oh man, okay, wait.
The only, uh, the only virus I believe in is, uh, John Malkovich from Con Air.
That guy was real as hell.
You saw all the shit he did?
That was his name in it?
Cyrus the Virus.
Cyrus the Virus, yeah.
I think that was him.
That's crazy.
We need to have him do a reset before the other reset.
He'll hack it all.
That's such a cool movie.
If John Malkovich is a badass in your movie, that's a good movie.
Yeah, it's a good move.
It's a good pull.
It's like not expected.
It's sort of him playing against type a little bit, but he does it so well.
Well, because he is a large presence, but it's forgotten because he plays kind of a sweetheart or like a smart guy or an oaf sometimes.
But when he plays a badass, it works really nicely.
Did you see Red retire in Extremely Dangerous?
Yeah, he's great in that.
He plays like the conspiracy theorist Dale Gribble type secret agent.
He's awesome.
So good.
I rewatched that like six months ago or something.
Very good.
I need to.
Where was it streaming?
Do you remember?
Netflix.
I'll look it up, never mind.
Netflix, Hulu, I don't know.
Six months ago, you know, so it's probably just a thumbnail.
It's different now, yeah.
Oh, I forgot to mention, the concert that Tony's going to tonight is Kamasi Washington.
We're all so jealous of him.
Yeah, and an Earl Sweatshirt.
Kamasi Washington and an Earl Sweatshirt.
When we did the Q&A question about, like, the best art released under the Trump era, I almost said Heaven and Earth by Kamasi Washington.
Totally, yeah.
That album.
Specifically, like, Fist and Fury.
Yep, that song.
I think we've used it as an outro before already.
I think we've had to, yeah.
That's so good.
I was so bummed when there was like no music video for it.
There's like a 15 second clip, but no full music video.
Because the imagery in that clip is so good.
The imagery around the whole thing, the whole album is incredible.
It's kind of a missed opportunity.
Okay, so yeah, we don't even know if these... I'll make one for you tonight.
Thank you.
We don't even know if these viruses exist.
Yeah.
Rumors.
Fucking shove your finger up your ass and wipe it in your friend's eyeball.
Nothing will happen.
Nothing will happen.
That's probably bad.
That's bacteria.
But the bacteria's not real either.
No.
No.
It's all an illusion.
It's all a glitch in the Matrix.
Learn COVID is a fraud.
Pandemics are just deep state assets stealing operations.
No, that's called capitalism, baby.
Stop going to the doctor.
What?
Number 11.
Stop going to the doctor.
Just do it.
Stop going to the doctor.
Going to the doctor is the worst thing you can do for your body.
It's a terrible idea.
I mean, I haven't done it in a very, very long time, mostly because of accessibility, and I'm still alive, so...
I might be dying.
I have a couple things that are scaring me, but you know, if I go to the doctor, it's only gonna confirm that.
Yeah, I haven't- You can't be sick if you're not diagnosed.
I haven't been to a real doctor in, yeah, like 10, 12 years.
Not because, uh...
I don't have insurance.
I actually am blessed to have good insurance.
I just, I, like the doctor that I had, you had to schedule an appointment like eight months in advance.
And it's like, who knows if I'm still going to need a regular physical in eight months.
Maybe my, like my body would be totally different by then, you know?
I might've been grievously injured between now and then.
I love it.
Stop going to the doctor.
Listen, you fucking sheep.
Stop going.
And it's I mean, it's like you said, Tony, I think a lot of Americans are catching on to this.
Going to the doctor has been declining in recent years, and I imagine they're they're awakening.
They're awakening to the truth.
Well people have been you know falling for this quote medicine for so long and uh we've got to stop.
I mean you you're you I don't want to hear from you because you're you're from what I know you're anti big pharma right?
So clearly we're on the same page here.
I love these people because they are they're like Oh, you really, uh, you really think, like, this, this pill sold to you, you know, by Big Pharma is going to, like, cure your acne or, I don't know, you know, cure your, uh, your Lyme disease or whatever?
Okay, yeah, sure.
Okay.
Uh, instead, take this black goop and rub it into between your toes every night, and that's how, that's what does it, actually.
This is actually, uh, something that's been put out by, um, by Big Leech.
By the Big Leech Corporation.
Bring back leeching.
Listen, oh, did you do the study?
Did you read the study about how, you know, these Alzheimer's medications actually cure Alzheimer's?
I bet you didn't even read the study.
Instead, yeah, let me carve a rune onto the small of your back, and that's going to cure your memory loss.
Yeah.
Love your country is number 12. - Number 12, love your country, your traditions and values.
They want to destroy nationalism.
That one is, it's true for us.
I don't think it's, it's not really true in The corporate world, because the corporate world, they've already transcended nationalism.
I mean, they've been multinational for decades now.
They know that nationalism is a fiction in general, a fiction that is exploited by these people but only continues to work for them as long as you dumbasses still believe in a nationalistic point of view.
Well, you know, a company, a corporation almost can't be nationalistic because how can you worship something that's worshipping you?
Like, the country bends to you, so you can't worship it.
Yeah, nationalism is like the little, I don't know, myna bird in the mouth of the hippopotamus or whatever.
Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
Am I boring you, Tony?
Oh sorry, no, no.
Alright.
Just checking.
13.
Love your race!
Okay, I'm on it.
I'm going for it.
It doesn't specify which race, so you know.
I think it applies to everybody.
Deal.
I mean, at least I'm good with me doing it.
Maybe throttle that a little bit for some other folks.
Same here, Tony.
I just got nothing but love for my race.
Well, good.
At least I can worry a little less about the Great Reset now.
No.
Love your race.
You are a special breed.
Honor your people by marrying someone of your own race.
Communists want a homogenous, nationless, unmarried, gray race.
I almost thought that said gay race.
Yeah, I mean, that sounds tight too.
Like yeah, grey.
You all know what happens when a black and white person get together.
They make a little alien.
It's true.
They make a little grey, almost like transparent but still grey skinned person.
They make a little, that guy from American Dad, Roger.
They make Roger from American Dad.
Yeah.
Listen, we don't want any more of those guys.
I'm really happy that came out after I went through elementary school because, I mean, it would have been hell as a mixed-race kid going through with that representation there, you know?
Yeah, the trouble with Roger would have had to have been a documentary that came out.
Instead, when they called me Roger, they were just talking about the next-door neighbor from Sister Sister.
They're doing Roger Bits where, like, what, he drinks a martini and, like, is catty about the clothes that women are wearing or something?
Yeah, yeah.
14.
Go to church!
Or acknowledge God in your own way.
Way, way ahead of you.
It's also a lot of room you gave us there, and I appreciate that.
See, the way I acknowledge God is what I do is I take unborn embryos that have been siphoned out of a woman's body, I mix them up in a blender, and then I drink them out of a ruby red slipper.
Everybody just celebrate God in their own way.
Now, also, this is a ruby wedge slipper that has been worn for an eight-hour shift by someone you paid handsome money to.
Well, yeah, that's the only way it works.
That's the only way it works.
The rest of that is, the Great Reset is satanic.
Oh.
Oh, oh, so now Satan can't be God.
All right.
Boring!
Sorry, all these rules.
Sorry, I thought we were going towards freedom here.
Yeah, I was like, we're trying to like represent my God, you know, aka Big Beelzebub.
I love it's like, the great, these communists, they just want a homogenized race.
Also, everybody should be white and worship the same God.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.
Everyone should be doing, keeping it so that we stay the same, but we can't let them be like, you know, get closer to us.
Because we're special.
15, tithe 10% of your income to a spiritual organization slash person.
Promote- I mean, that just goes without saying.
We've already done that.
We worship God in our own way.
Promote abundance.
What?
So- What?
What does that mean?
Oh, like living lavishly, like having your boat and having all your things, but using all the possible gas you can because you deserve it.
No, it's about letting your spiritual leaders do that.
It's about promoting that by donating to it.
I mean, honestly, if your pastor doesn't have the latest kicks, then your whole congregation needs to reflect.
I'm not listening to him anymore.
No.
If they're not dripped out in off-white, then, I mean, what do they know about God?
No.
Listen, I've read that only squares don't wear Alex Crane threads, and if I see my fucking preacher come out one more time without a $400 chore coat on, fuck this guy.
Fuck that.
That's fucking bullshit.
What am I giving him 10% for?
Yeah!
How am I supposed to expect to get that short code if he doesn't have that short code?
Well, I think maybe you're just too sinful, Tony.
I think God rewards the holy with prosperity.
That's one thing we've learned by living here in America, the prosperity gospel.
That's what this is a reference to.
Promote abundance by giving, yeah, like 10% of your entire fucking income, which is like, yeah, probably $1,000 for these people or something like that a year, you know?
Give it to that rich guy you listen to prattle on every day.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
He needs it.
Take vitamin D3.
Maybe that one's good.
What?
Sure.
I feel like, but what's the weird part behind it?
Cause there's no, you know, there's gotta be some weird part about, does it like, does it like make your dick bigger or something?
That I think that's, does it give you, it probably gives you bigger loads.
I think it decalcifies your pineal gland or something.
Like, you know, you really take it because I don't know, it promotes blood flow or something like that, but they're just telling everybody, oh, it puts the minerals back in your brain, you know, that you need or something.
Uh, homeschool your kids, teach them about liberty, search Ron Paul's curriculum.
Whoa.
Which, by the way, you don't have to do that because they do that in the fucking public schools anyways.
Yeah, I mean, you listen to all the greats.
Ron Paul, Mike Rowe, uh, Dennis Prager.
You find them all in public school now.
Probably.
Yeah, and I mean, listen to Ron Paul.
If you can't find Ron Paul's stuff, listen to Rand Paul's stuff.
They're both very real doctors who know just what to say to your kids.
Man, there's probably people who are homeschooling their kids that actually have them listen.
Like, as a project, part of their curriculum is listening to every episode of Joe Rogan.
That's better than this shit, to be honest.
Like, it's probably better than 30 Ways to Defeat the Great Reset.
That's for sure what they're doing in part of their homeschool curriculum.
Like, I know Joe Rogan has some fucked up people on his podcast, and he's just a general dumbass, and probably a bit of a coward, an intellectual coward.
But he also, like, I think listening to Dennis Prager is worse than Joe Rogan.
Oh, absolutely.
Because at least if you listen to Joe Rogan, you're hopefully really stoned and you're not going to remember half of what you heard.
Yeah.
Fly the American flag everywhere!
Show communism is not welcome here.
The link to one of the truck poles for your flag?
20.
Boycott woke!
Racist corporations!
Yeah, Disney, Coke, Amazon, etc.
I think it would, yeah, once again be just really fucking funny and a blow to them if we encouraged the employees at Coca-Cola and Amazon and Disney to like stage a walkout or something like that.
Maybe picket the company until, you know, they stopped doing communism and paid their employees a fair wage.
Yeah, that would be a, you know, that's the real way to stop communism, I think.
I think we should encourage that.
Yeah, shop local, support local businesses.
See, they have the same idea as you, Tony.
I hate it so much.
It's so stupid.
They all shop small, but no, you're, you're, you're, you're, especially here where I'm at, all those little cottage, little small boutiques, they're literally all cop wives.
They're all people who's like, you know, they're all people who come from rich families.
They're, they're buying cheap products.
They're, they're marking them up.
And all you're doing is just like, you're financing a hobby and it's, You gotta take it a step further for that one, people.
It's so bad.
Yeah, it's funny, like the idea that small business owners aren't also rich assholes.
Yes.
Anybody who's worked for a mom and pop knows the truth.
They're not saying you're automatically a rich asshole if you run a small business.
I mean, look at us, Tony and I. Yeah, not at all.
It's when you have employees.
When you have an employee, that's when you become an asshole.
Tony and I don't have any employees yet.
Nope.
23.
Uh...
23.
Get an Ionic footbath!
And use it.
It pulls heavy metals and toxins from your feet.
Does it detox vaccines and reverse autoimmune disorders?
Supplement with probiotics.
It's that easy.
Just sip some kombucha and wash your feet and you're good.
Like going to the doctor?
Pseudoscience.
Not real.
Bullshit.
But also, uh, spray this shit on your feet, uh, and it's gonna reverse your autoimmune disorder.
Yeah, yeah.
So stupid.
Splash your feet in the fucking sink with some, uh, with a soda stream, uh, and that's gonna get rid of your lupus.
Yeah, but just make sure you use alkaline water.
Uh, yeah, purify your water is number 24.
I mean, that's probably good.
That's a good idea.
That's fine.
It's good to have filtered water.
Get 20 minutes of direct sunlight daily and practice earthing walking barefoot.
Oh my god.
So yeah, uh, 30 ways to defeat the great reset over here saying, uh, go outside, touch grass.
Go outside.
Do it.
Do it.
Throw a football.
Yeah.
You can do five minutes if you just expose your anus to the sun.
It synthesizes it and speeds it up.
What is that called again?
Is that the sun salutation?
What is that called again?
It's called like anal sun.
It's called like sunning.
They call it the per diem.
No, the perennium or something like that?
They don't call it asshole, they call it the perennium or something like that.
Okay, I just need to know so I can tell my neighbors, explain to my neighbors what's going on.
What are you doing?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I need to know the technical details.
It's a real thing, it's called my perennium.
Yeah, they call it that, so they know how stupid it sounds.
You gotta give it a big word.
Listen, I got a quote on a wooden fence and it's too expensive.
The chain link is staying for the time being.
If you want to help raise money for this, but I can't stop sunning my perennium.
It's something I need.
Do you want to see me sad, bro?
26.
Realize mass migration is invasion.
So that's a normal one.
We've heard that one before.
No collectivism is your enemy.
You are an individual.
Yeah.
What?
Cool.
You're an individual who is not a slave and can quit your job at Walmart anytime.
So suck it up.
Anytime you want, yeah.
Buttercup.
Uh, become pro-life.
At this point I'm sure they already are.
If you're still reading this and you're not an ironic podcaster, you're probably pro-life.
You've already have six white children, so you're clearly not about taking care of that.
Number 29.
Men, remove all soy and estrogens from your lifestyle.
Oh man, that's actually why DJ Khaled doesn't go down on people.
I was just going to say that.
You're clearly getting some estrogen in your system that way.
You feel me?
I'm probably ingesting so much ova when I do that.
Just straight up.
You're trying to weaken me.
To the dome, slamming phytoestrogens.
Shotgunning, just shotgunning them.
Those aren't plant-based either.
That's not plant-based estrogen.
That's the real deal from the source.
Yeah, just cracking my girl like a fucking coconut and pouring her estrogen over my face.
But only because you want to become more feminine.
Totally.
Yep.
I mean, we've all seen those videos.
There's nothing more lady-like than doing a 69 with your first roommate at the co-ed school.
It's true.
It's true.
You look submissive there.
You look very submissive and readable when you're 69.
Don't do that.
Last one, 30.
This one's for the ladies.
Women!
Defy feminism!
Feminism was a communist trick to make you pay taxes.
Be a mother if you're able.
Do they think that single women didn't?
Oh, I guess if you're a feminist, you're single, you're a feminist.
Never mind.
If you're not a feminist, you already are married, so only your husband's paying taxes.
Yeah, let's see.
Okay, we've heard about biblical voting, where one household, one vote.
That's the same way it should be with taxes.
It should be one household, one tax.
Yeah, I think so.
I agree with that.
I'm gonna draw a big- I'm gonna take a paint bucket and draw on my whole fucking house, on the front of my house, across the garage.
DO NOT TAX MY WIFE!
Stop contacting her!
I do.
That is a good move though if you're trying to propose to somebody or something like that's kind of a flex like, you know, would you do me the honor of never paying taxes again?
Oh, and she pulls out like, yeah, she pulls out an AR-15 and night vision goggles and she's like, oh yeah, let's do this.
And you're like, oh baby, I knew you were the one.
Oh yeah.
She puts on her fucking Benjamin Franklin mask.
She just has a curly wig, one of those powder wigs.
And I know this is pedantic at this point, but the idea that feminism was a communist trick to make you pay taxes is so funny to me.
It's so funny because it's like, okay, think about how much you're paying in taxes.
Yeah, you're paying a lot in taxes probably.
I mean, depending on your income bracket, if you make less money, you're paying a lot in taxes.
Yeah.
Think about how much more you're not getting paid thanks to wage stagnation.
Yes, absolutely.
That's a much better return on investment there.
Think about how much money they're taking from your income, from you, now that every household has to be at least a two-income household to survive.
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
He used to be a one-income household, could get along and support a whole family, have a couple cars, whatever.
Now it's two incomes can't even do that.
So think about what you're paying in taxes versus how much a house costs, or how much a second car would cost, or putting your kids through college, or even being able to afford kids, because that's what corporate America has taken from you.
That's what this system has taken from you.
It's a little more than the 15, 20%, 30% that taxes you.
Yeah, yeah.
The math is clearly there, but for some reason they don't like it because if wages go up, then if you are owning a company, you have to pay bigger wages.
And one day I'm going to own a company.
That's the whole thing behind that.
So stupid.
Yeah, I mean, there's probably a lot of people who are hurting and would benefit from, you know, an organized workforce or straight up communism who are buying into this stuff.
And I mean, it's you know, it's not really a wonder why you would turn to more desperate and desperate Fantasies to cope with your reality or whatever.
I think imagining a scenario where you're defeating the most powerful people in the world by washing your feet would be pretty appealing.
I mean, hey, I'd do it, you know?
Yeah, if that's all it took, I'd be about it.
So it's not, you know, but obviously this is a lot of unhealthy stuff, but it's funny to laugh at and exploit for a podcast.
Absolutely, but we do need to acknowledge that this is completely, completely out of mind.
This is nuts.
You're out of your mind if you think this is anything productive.
That's right, Tony.
Thanks so much for listening to the show.
Again, if you want more content, more episodes, go to patreon.com slash MinionDeathCult, P-A-T-R-E-O-N dot com slash MinionDeathCult.
That link is also in the info, the show notes of this page.
And Tony, episode two of Last Responders, Coming out today!
Out today for people subscribing at the $5 Minions Law Enforcement tier.
Thanks to everybody for supporting the show.
Again, you want to write to us, it's MinionDeathCult at gmail.com, MinionDeathCult on social media, and the MinionDeathCommando's Facebook group.
Anything else, Tony?
No, thank you all for your support.
I hope you enjoy the last response episode coming out.
Just, I don't know, maybe try to be aware of stuff going on right now.
Trans people are super under attack right now.
It's wild.
Stuff going on in LA is disgusting and abhorrent and I don't know, let's just try to call some attention on that.
