As a thank you to our patrons, we present our first full-length bonus episode in a lot of months. It's a Doozy! www.patreon.com/miniondeathcult We cover the utterly stupid "Easter Worshippers" controversy in the wake of the Sri Lankan terror attacks, wherein American Christians found an even greater tragedy: they didn't get name-dropped. Also: Buttigieg is literally causing the end of the world by being gay And: Sanders' proposal to grant inmates voting rights generates some of the dumbest discourse we've seen on the show.
Uh, I think this guy fucking Matt Walsh is hilarious.
Uh, he wrote a whole article about how Easter Worshipper is problematic.
Um, the headline of this Daily Wire piece that Matt Walsh wrote... Yes.
Easter Worshipper was intentional.
Yes, it matters.
Here's why.
Like, I love how click- that's like three different clickbaits in that title.
Yeah, well played.
Yeah, that's a good one.
It's definitely Buzzfeed or Medium.
Here's why it's important.
Here's a Voxplainer about why Easter Worshipper is coming from the mouths of Satan.
But, um, yeah, it's just all about how, you know, Democrats are too afraid to say the word Christian.
They want to erase the persecution that Christians face.
And I mean, the implication here is just that me as a Christian, as a as a privileged Christian white man with, you know, 20,000 followers on Twitter, this was an attack on me.
This attack in Sri Lanka was an attack on me.
I'm the victim, but I'm not getting any of that sweet sympathy sex or whatever because you refuse to say the word Christian.
How can I benefit from this unless you say Christian?
Well, the way you do that is you benefit from it by calling them out for not saying Christian.
Yeah, I have just a blurb here, but Easter worshipers is a different thing entirely.
Responding to the slaughter of hundreds of Christians during Easter attacks by radical Muslim terrorists, a number of prominent Democratic politicians chose to issue statements that glaringly omit any direct mention of the faith identity of the victims.
So yeah, when you want to find out the faith identity of a terrorist attack and some overseas victims, you go to Hillary Clinton's Twitter.
And if it's not there, how are you going to know?
And I mean, if she says Easter worshipers, how are you going to know that's from the religion that celebrates Easter?
Who knows?
Yeah, it might be one of the many other religions that celebrates some guy rising from the dead three days later.
Like that Egyptian one that they talk about in that movie.
Um, and you know, this is Bill Maher have to say about it.
Oh boy.
Oh boy.
I bet, I bet he popped off.
Um, and this is really petty, but, um, I just, I found a, another tweet from Matt Walsh from not too long ago.
Uh, he has quote, like posted the link to a CBS news article.
You remember that, that, like, Christian church that was bringing rifles to the sermons?
And, like, they were all, like, that was part of the service, was everybody brought a rifle, and they were in, like, their fuckin' baptismal gowns with rifles and shit?
Yeah, remember that one time that me and you were almost saved but then it was too far away so we couldn't go to service?
Yeah, exactly.
Well, he quoted this CBS News tweet.
Hundreds of crown-wearing worshippers clutching AR-15 rifles drank holy wine and exchanged or renewed wedding vows in a commitment ceremony at a Pennsylvania church.
Matt Walsh says, This is a cult, not a church.
It has no relation to Christianity whatsoever.
But of course, CBS News wants to make it appear otherwise by calling them worshippers at a church rather than cult members.
So the obvious discrepancy here is that in his post about the Sri Lanka, in his article about the Sri Lanka attacks He has somehow deduced that there is a nefarious plot to erase Christian identity by using the word worshippers instead and About a couple months ago or a year ago.
Yes a year ago.
He also discovered a nefarious plot to implicate Christians in this, uh, service by calling them worshippers.
So, uh, this is a cool word, worshippers.
It can both, uh, mean absolutely not Christian and absolutely Christian.
Listen, Matt, I'm not gonna let you, uh, whitewash your past, okay?
Wow.
Yeah, I'm gonna go home now.
I'm sorry.
You are home, dude.
Well, home is where the heart is, and Seattle's real far away.
I'm waiting.
It's only like a 17 and a half hour drive.
You're right, you're right.
You gotta go 80, though.
85 the whole time.
Not in my car.
Yeah, here's another article from the Daily Wire.
Man drives van into crowd of Ramadan worshippers in London.
Yeah, so cool stuff.
This was the hypothetical that was laid out in every fucking right-wing comment section I saw.
Oh, if they did this about Muslims, there would be even more terror attack if they dared to call Muslims Ramadan worshipers, which we did in this other article.
It's so wild.
A church is commonly referred to as a house of worship.
yeah it's like this is not they just the the need like you said the need to make this about them is so absurd It's already a fucking crazy tragedy.
It is a tragedy.
It is an atrocity.
It is one of the most violent attacks that has happened in years.
I think they're saying it's definitely the most violent it's happened in Sri Lanka since the civil war ten years ago.
Like, and that's the culmination of the war.
It's so, it's already fucked.
It's as fucked as you can possibly get.
Yeah, you don't need to make it any more fucked.
You don't need to get into semantics and make it about you and your fucking cushy western world.
Yeah, it's the exact same thing they did with, uh, Somebody Did Something on 9-11.
I mean, it's, you know, it's the same grievance politics bullshit.
But that just goes to show how, like, fuckin', uh, you know, easy these boomers got it over here in America.
And then, uh, finally, just real quick, another Daily Wire headline.
A woman brings baby and gun to Easter service, threatens to blow it up.
Churchgoers leap into action.
Why are they refusing to acknowledge that it was Christian Easter churchgoers who leapt into action?
Why are they just saying churchgoers on Easter?
I don't get it.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Okay.
Anyway, that ends the petty section of this episode.
It's so stupid.
Like, it's not even worth pointing out, but I mean, it's just, it's kind of funny.
No, it's great.
It's great.
Thomas Stroll says about this.
Best fucking take.
Christian is the n-word for secular progressives.
The ultimate sin is to deny God and His Son, knowing that they are the salvation of humanity.
They shall rue the day they denied our Lord and Savior.
There's a lot going on in this one comment.
There's so much pathology in this one comment.
I'm trying to suss it out.
I'm still working on it.
You know, as both a Christian and an N-word, only one of those statements is true, I don't even know... Like, what the fuck are you saying, Thomas?
Okay, so let's go through it slowly.
Christian is the n-word for secular progressives.
Now, there's two possible things here.
The first one, I'm going to try to keep this straight in my brain because it's kind of breaking it in half right now.
So, Christian is the n-word for secular progressives.
Meaning, my first thought is they're not allowed to say it.
Yeah, yeah.
Which does that mean that Thomas not only says Christian, but I mean, I'm just saying.
He says the n-word and it's good.
It's a good thing to say.
It's a good thing you should say.
I call it what it is.
Or, I don't know, the secondary thought I have is that he's trying to say Christians are the N-word of the world.
He's channeling some Yoko Ono and John Lennon here, talking about the persecution and how, yeah, sure, black people have it bad, but really, it's really the Christians.
Yeah, absolutely.
That's a good point there.
Yeah, the Christians are just really having a hard time.
I don't know if you know how hard they've been fighting to roll back people, let alone specifically women's rights in America.
But it's been a real struggle for them.
Now that's real persecution.
Well, because woman was the n-word of the world.
But they've been fighting them really hard to be the n-word of the world.
And they've been doing that through reproductive rights, rollbacks.
The pay gap, etc.
Just the general patriarchy, you know, beat him back so that you can be the new N-word of the world.
It is pretty ironic that, you know, women are the N-word of the world because of Christians.
Yeah, yeah.
I also have a strong argument that N-words of the world are N-words of the world because of Christianity, but that's an entirely different hour-long spiel I have about how Christianity is one of the biggest handicaps of black America.
But if you want to ask me about that, feel free.
My DMs are open.
I will have a hefty conversation with you.
Yeah, I think we could probably say fundamentalist religion in general is a big perpetrator of that.
Finally for this topic, this is Lawrence, or no, this was a post in QAnon, follow the white rabbit, about, you know, the Orwellian, what is it called, doublespeak with, you know, Easter worshipers and who's really behind it.
David Arthur says, This is about Hillary Clinton specifically, her tweet.
David Arthur says, and wasn't she really meaning to say, quote, deplorable, legal, law abiding, pro-American, so-called white nationalist, patriotic America's Obama's holders and killer.
He's gun stealing, so-called right wing terrorist names taking list making equals equals equals.
Farce booked, Googled up and penciling dry run Jade Helms training and many, many others of all races equals equals equals.
Quote, Easter worshipers slash Christians bashing since she's being so open and honest for her obvious two faced backstabbing treasonous headscarves wearing submitted love for Satan's Islam and their never ending pocket stuffing lawless quote pencil it in.
Unconstitutional gun-stealing, anti-American, open-border, sorrow-soddy bin al-Walid's four top floors of Mandalay Bay owning a newly converted bump stock using, quote, false flag-creating, murderous gun-stealing agendas promoting... Equals, equals, equals.
So what this is, it's that game you play when you're on, you're texting and you just press the next predictive word.
This guy's predictive text is so fucked up.
It's so, I'm like, I'm, I'm, what's funny about this, I don't even think this person's like a gnarly right-wing conservative.
I think this person's like a gnarly centrist.
Okay.
Cause they like even come out against bump stocks.
Um, no, I think they're talking about the Bumpstock ban.
Oh, no, they said Bumpstock using.
Honestly, deciphering this is... Okay, this is probably a reference to a specific, uh, conspiracy theory about the Las Vegas shooter.
Oh, yep.
What's, what, dude, what's wild is, like, our minds, yours specifically, are pretty conditioned To like see things and be like- For what they are.
What they are.
Yeah.
And like this shit is, this is, this is like next level.
And what's wild is, um, someone probably saw this and was all, hell yeah!
It's got one line.
Hell yeah.
Hell.
Yeah.
Do you remember we had this guy before?
David Arthur?
I don't remember.
I didn't remember his name.
I mean, I, I, you know, I, I'm surprised.
How could I forget a name like David Arthur?
But no, the equals equals equals.
Yep.
Uh, and then the tick tock punks tick tock.
We had this guy before.
Yep.
Or somebody just like him?
I feel like when this person presses, like, enter or send... it It's such like a relief.
It's like, it's like busting a nut for sure.
He did another one.
He did another one in this comment section.
He did, he did another fucking dry bust in like two comments lower that I'm not gonna read because it's, you know, it's... Well, because we like to keep the show, you know, around an hour, 15, hour and a half.
I just wanted to say another common comment I saw was, WE DON'T WORSHIP EASTER!
WE WORSHIP GOD.
And, uh, like I said at the top of the show, um, there is no hyphen between Easter worshippers, so, um, you know, hey, learn some fucking grammar, you, you dumb redneck rubes, and then maybe you won't get into this problem.
Yeah, come on now.
Remember, this is the classist hour of Minion Death Note.
