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Feb. 4, 2021 - Louder with Crowder
01:09:50
#AOCLied and I'll Prove it... | Louder with Crowder
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Time Text
🎵 Forever by J.S. Bach 🎵 🎵 Stranger In Love 🎵
🎵 You're a stranger in love, that's what I know 🎵 🎵 You're a stranger in love, I can't get far 🎵
🎵 I'm just a little disappointed 🎵 🎵 I'm a stranger in love 🎵
Oh wow, we're ready to take that from the top again!
Oh, jeez.
Peace.
Hit the intro again there, Quarter Black Garrett.
Haha.
This is the first time I've ever seen a video of a character in a game.
I don't know if it's because I'm a fan of the game, or because I'm a fan of the game.
I'm a fan of the game, and I'm a fan of the game.
That's helpful.
So stupid.
So stupid is the theme of today with AOC.
And truth.
Facts.
Truth.
There is a difference between people who are conniving political geniuses who are dishonest and someone who's just so So dumb with zero life experience.
That's what we're dealing with with AOC, the fact that she didn't think anyone would fact check her on her fake story.
I know we're not the first to address this, but we have some info that not a lot of people have spoken about.
Court of Blackguard, are we streaming out to YouTube?
Yeah, we're having an issue with it.
It looks like it might be some kind of... Are they messing with us?
Yeah, resolution issue.
Is this going out to YouTube right now?
Yeah, it is.
People can hear me?
Yep.
People can hear you.
It's playing very large for some reason.
It's playing very large.
Can they see him?
Yeah, it's like it's zoomed in.
Okay, well you know what?
Let's put this on pause here really quickly and then come back because I don't want to be looking like an AOC Instagram video.
You really don't.
Are we good?
Okay, we are good anyway.
We have some exclusive information here on AOC, and the fact checks, and what's interesting is she actually wants all of you to flag, to report this show and anything on Twitter, Facebook, to act like social media gestapo.
Remarkable.
Remarkable.
So yeah, I guess they call it a deep dive, is that what they call it now?
I don't know.
Gerald is here.
How are you?
I am well.
Dave Landau is here as well today.
My half-Asian lawyer can't be here because he's suing Facebook.
You're going to be doing a show soon.
Yes, I've got Omaha coming up and Good Nights in Raleigh.
And in Omaha there might be a little special appearance, I don't know.
Porter Black Garrett is here.
Porter Black Garrett, how are you?
I'm doing great, man.
Which means don't do that, it's disgusting, it offends me.
But that brings us, before we talk about the rest of it, it is a Black History Month.
Okay.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Quarterback Garrett, drop some knowledge here for people who don't know.
Alright.
Alright, cut it out.
This is a real fact.
This is a real fact.
That's enough.
Hey, man.
That's enough.
That's my shit, man.
That's embarrassing.
Lil Uzi Vert.
You're a worse stain on your people than OJ.
I can't believe you say that.
I'm so offended right now.
But Lil Uzi Vert, let me get to it, okay?
Lil Uzi Vert made history by implanting a $24 million diamond in his face.
That's actually true.
That's for real?
No, that is true.
Oh, really?
What do you think this is?
Yeah.
It's facts.
Real quick.
Listen, I can't wait to see the lottery winner who cuts that out of the show.
This is going to be Don King with a Jake Paul super fight.
Keep in mind, listen, he's not paying attention.
Mike Tyson had $150 million stolen from Don King.
Oh, yeah.
The point is, the number gets high before they start paying attention to their expenses.
And by they, I mean wealthy celebrities who buy expensive things.
Who are dark.
Well, Mike Tyson also had flat-screen televisions in his tiger cages.
I'm not kidding.
Oh, wow.
They need entertainment, too.
Just that sentence.
They do.
They need to watch something.
He's like a better Joe Exotic.
I want them watching Discovery, but now Discovery's really just a bunch of midgets in reality shows.
They're disappointed.
They're ill-tempered.
I'm gonna hit a woman now.
That was never proven.
Never.
What?
Allegedly?
You can't take a Tyson punch and not prove it.
It's gonna leave a mark.
Speaking of proof, today is all about documenting proof.
AOC will be talking about a crazy new gun bill.
But first, John Kerry, the climate czar, That's a phrase that just came out of my mouth.
Yeah.
John Kerry climate czar.
Doesn't it make sense?
Why are we back with the czars again?
I don't know.
I don't like that title.
Russian tea house.
It was John Kerry's czars.
That was just him locked down in a Toronto airport in 2006.
Yeah.
That's too bad.
So he's taking heat now for an incident in 2019, since he is the climate czar now, or green energy czar, whatever you want to call it, because he went to go accept his Arctic Circle Award for climate leadership.
I'm reading these because these are actual awards.
And now that he's in charge of being green, people said, well, hold on a second, he took that award at the cost of a private jet.
And they asked him, did you really need to use a private jet?
And here is John Kerry Climate Czar's answer.
If you offset your carbon, it's the only choice for somebody like me who is traveling the world to win this battle.
Oh, that's convenient.
I understand.
I understand time is money.
You can make that argument.
But did you really need two of them, John?
I just think that it was overkill.
By the way, hey, before we move on to AOC, follow me on Instagram.
That's where we do a lot of stuff.
You can read more about my babies in the album.
Oh yeah, they're coming.
They're on their way.
Baby A, I'm excited.
Baby B's gonna be a dick.
Oh no.
Do you know which is which?
It's just constantly in the sonogram, just kicking on the junior suite of the other baby.
He has this giant club foot.
The Miracle of Life.
Also, you can join MugClub.
I think it's valid for the rest of the week.
Ladderwithpedder.com slash MugClub.
You get $30 off if you use the promo code CROWDER.
That's fantastic.
Returns.
We'll be taking your chat a little later on, along with the running of the interns and Manny the police sketch artist, which we of course could not do here on YouTube.
No way.
No way.
So my question to you, question of the day before we move on here is, Why do you think someone like AOC, because everyone will say, do you believe AOC?
Do you not believe AOC?
Of course not.
But why do you think she's so comfortable lying?
And it really does mirror sort of Joe Biden.
You know, Joe Biden, like Donald Trump was a, sometimes would be a bullshitter, right?
He would say things like, I am the best.
The doctor said, I am the healthiest ever.
Like, okay, scale it back.
Whereas Joe Biden will say that he is a doctor and he invented health.
Right.
And AOC just made all this up with with the shooting and now she's doubling down on it and making up new facts that we will rebut today because they're also verifiably false.
Well, a lot of guys that wanted to pick her up over the years lied to her and said she was smart.
Oh, no, it's true.
So she eventually learned that lying was easy and could get people, you know, she believed people.
Yeah.
So yeah, she's like, yeah, this will work.
Yeah, I am.
And by the way, she's like the kind of girl who would say, I am so random.
Oh, jeez.
That kind of girl.
Or like, I'm not religious, but I'm spiritual.
I'm spiritual.
And I don't even know why I told you that just now.
It's because I'm like, so random.
Now, before we move on to everything that is factually incorrect, and there's been some misinformation out there because some people have been rubbing facts that she never actually claimed.
Fair game.
We need to accept responsibility.
The whole Capitol, right, people who went into the Capitol, separate from that.
This is separate from AOC.
We learned our lesson.
Dave, you know now that the Capitol Mall is not the right place to host your Natural Born Killers quote-a-thon.
We now know better.
It's a fun event, and if it wasn't for me, you would be still slinging hash in that shithouse and banging your boss.
I see what he did there.
The point is, I understand some of the confusion.
So, we will give AOC some grace.
Please come next week.
Grace over.
You're all invited.
It was pretty much just me yelling.
So we covered that on Instagram, right?
It was going live.
She was recounting the Capitol riots and was trending was Alexandria Ocasio-Smollett, again, trending number one.
I think you have that overlay there, Gibbon.
Oh, yeah.
And so there are some initial claims.
Now, here's the thing, though.
It goes far deeper.
Which by the way is very similar to Jussie Smollett.
Here's what happened with Jussie Smollett.
This is what happens with these stories.
Someone comes out and makes a claim.
The claim was white supremacists saying this is MAGA country, Jussie Smollett, wrapped a noose around my neck and poured bleach on me.
And then they found out it was two Nigerian personal trainers who had a Home Depot store credit card.
They put it on the company tab and he said, but really Really, this could have happened because of systemic racism.
And Brian Stelter, Newstance Money, was like, well, you need to address the real problem
in the United States.
So this is what happened.
AOC made claims which are verifiably false.
We'll get to that.
When people said, hey, those claims are verifiably false, she tried to say, this is media manipulation,
defended her claims again, made new ones, and then last night or this morning sent an
email out to her supporters demanding that her supporters flag and report anyone fact-checking
her verifiably false claims.
That is encouraging social media Gestapo-like behavior.
She's not saying, hey, look for...
This is the truth.
This is what people are saying.
Let me provide you some sources so you know what actually happened.
Let me give you some context.
She is telling her supporters, if you see anyone claiming that what I said is untrue or anyone saying anything mean to me because of my lies, report them to the authorities who, by the way, are more powerful than the Roman Empire.
Big three companies, really big five.
Amazon, Google.
Alphabet, Google, same company, Facebook, Twitter, Apple.
They're more powerful than the government.
In some way, because they both had an in-tech sandwich at the end.
Not only that, but if you go down a little further in her letter, she basically says, if people are saying these things against me, that's what led to the violence that we experienced on the Capitol.
So she's tying it back to just saying she's lying is now inciting violence.
Unbelievable.
I don't know how you put something out like that.
And she did it last night because she was so concerned that she was trending for the wrong reasons.
I remember a simple time when inciting violence was defined by actually inciting violence.
Well, those were the days.
Remember?
Remember they used to argue against free speech?
They used to have this lazy argument saying, You know, yeah, freedom of speech, but you can't yell fire in a crowded theater, they would say, but you can't, you know, tell someone to kill somebody else, and we would go, oh, okay, well, we understand that, yeah, of course, because that's not freedom of speech, that's a call to a violent action.
And now they've expanded it, they go, well, what if you say something that somebody else really doesn't like, and that is the equivalent to violence, because words are weapons, too.
This is where we are.
My interpretation was violence.
That was my interpretation.
Nonsense.
You're a literalist.
Yeah, well, David Berkowitz's neighbor's dog told him to commit violence.
The dog has been arrested, though, on Free Speech Council.
That's true, they did put it down.
They were like, the devil might be in it.
Berkowitz really got the short end of the stick on the Pets.com bubble.
Really did, yeah.
Went down to the wrong pound.
What are you, the Pet Mets?
So here, let's go first.
We watched her entire 90 minute video on Instagram, which I just, I will say it's sad.
The reason that AOC makes these things up, the reason that she's a public drama queen, I'll get to that in a little bit.
I actually think it's kind of sad.
I really do genuinely have empathy for her.
I think there's a void that she's looking to fill and she's been dishonest about that void.
The look in her eyes?
Yeah, the look in her eyes, the soulless stare, the devil's eyes, and they roll over, stupid.
So this was her initially claiming that people, people, domestic terrorists, breached her office.
Then I just start to hear these yells of, where is she?
Where is she?
This is Trump country.
And I just thought to myself, they got inside.
Don't believe you thought.
So now you have Representative Nancy Mace.
She was in the same hallway as AOC.
We have this tweet.
It's been confirmed.
There were no rioters who entered the hallway.
Now that being said, this isn't super important because this is what she did.
She included this early in the 90-minute video, but used it as a bait-and-switch to later on try and do like a soap opera cliffhanger and say, and it turns out it was the cops.
So, this is not the most relevant portion of information, but it's what everybody is circulating.
That being said, she did do us the favor of doubling down on that lie in another report, so it still is relevant.
But here's her saying, oh, got you.
And I come out, and this man is a Capitol Police officer.
But the story doesn't end.
And there's a hook on the door!
But wait!
Is she going to double my order?
Alright, before I move on because I'm gonna get really mad, hit the notification bell because subscriptions don't mean a whole lot on YouTube and I don't know if this is actually gonna get out.
It'll get out.
When you see YouTube, when you see Seth Meyers trending... I think this is going to get out the same way she barely did.
Just by the skin of her... What is she?
A Columbian?
I don't care.
I have a question.
I'm a little lost here because she said she was in a bathroom, right?
She had gone to the back of this and she put herself up against the wall and she's like, there's a door right here and it opens and I can see out.
Like she was Snake in Metal Gear Solid.
Where is she?
Was she hiding from Satan there?
Did she not look through the crease in the door to see if it was a police officer?
Well, again, the police report describes her eyes as googly.
I repeat, googly.
From what I understand, the call was coming from inside the house.
Yes.
Oh no!
Again?
She can't see through cracks, but she can see around corners like that super soaker.
Yes.
By the way, comment, comment, comment.
Any 90s kids out there, you remember that super soaker with the handle?
You remember that.
Do I?
Oh my gosh, yeah.
And the first thing you're like, hey, dad, I'm aiming at this target.
Oh, I got you!
And then my dad would beat me.
So, hold on a second, hold on a second.
Here's the thing.
Was she evacuated because people were rushing the office?
Is that what you're saying, Elsie?
I think we have an overlay here.
Okay, let me give you a timeline here because again there was another report after that where she did say that people rushed the office.
So in her video she said that people rushed the office but they found out it was the cops.
But then there's another report, I think it was LA Times, that said actually no, she said that people did actually rush the office.
So then she didn't say that it was the cops.
What matters here is the inconsistency.
Let me give you a timeline to show you why her new claims are physically impossible However, that has never stopped AOC in the past.
Granted, I understand why there might be a disconnect.
I'm trying to bridge the divide, right?
I'm trying to make sense of the timeline.
She's nonsensical, and a straitjacket wouldn't be out of reason.
But she's upset.
She knows she has 12 good years left.
Well, 11 now, I think.
You're a generous man, Dave.
Yeah, that's true.
That's high praise!
1.22 p.m., the Cannon Building received an evacuation notice due to executing internal relocation due to police activity.
This is a quote here.
Then at 1.39 p.m., the D.C.
police issued this alert.
If you are in the Cannon Building, take visitors, escape hoods, and go-kits and report to the South Tunnel connecting to the Longworth.
Further information will be provided as it becomes available at 1.44 p.m.
Nancy Mace tweeted, just evacuated my office in Cannon, the Cannon building, which is where she was, which is where there were no other people, pretty far away in the Longworth, just evacuated my office in Cannon due to a nearby threat.
Now we're seeing protesters assaulting the Capitol building.
So, before 1.44pm, Nancy found time to get settled, read her Twitter feed, and find a video to retweet.
At 1.47pm, The DC police announced that the evacuation was all cleared.
Okay?
She would have been completely evacuated and underground.
Right?
That's when she would have been underground when she's talking about this, this, this insurrection happening.
Where she was there hiding.
Okay.
There's no possible way.
Look at the timeline.
Yeah.
She was gone.
She's already been evacuated at that point.
So she's still full of crap.
Are you guys following me?
I am following you, yes.
I'm surprised and shocked.
Yeah, that's exactly where I'm at.
She then said when she reached the Longworth building, she could hear hinges cracking, to Trump mob yelling, trying to break in, and then when she saw Katie Porter, the Congressman Moomoo, she asked if she could shelter with her, shelter together, and that was confirmed.
Again, it's a timeline.
Here's Congress Z Porter.
I think you have Clipsy.
Clipsy.
It's coming.
Is it coming?
We can like hear all of these rioters behind the glass of the door.
Oh wait, no, never mind.
This is it.
You know?
And we have no specific location to go to.
We're in the hallway.
We're in like the Dunkin' Donuts of the basement.
She could not have been there at this time.
I just gave you the timeline.
Trying to break into the building that we're in.
It almost felt like...
A zombie movie or something.
And then we hear like other Capitol Police trying to protect the building barking back at these people and it just feels like it's just a matter of seconds when um when these doors are gonna break through and they're gonna get it.
I hear like like the hinges cracking.
Okay, yeah, here's the thing.
That was, again, at 147 she would have already been evacuated according to her own words and according to the documents that we have.
She could have heard no hinges cracking.
This is what I'm talking about.
It's not that she, look, if she were to say it was really scary and we were evacuated and it was a blur, she is making up verifiable lies that could not possibly be true and this is the problem with the media, big tech, and this administration.
They feel as though no one is going to call them on it.
And she feels so comfortable in just being immune that she's actually willing to go to the heads of big tech and send her mob out to flag anyone who questions her.
No way she could have been there.
No way she could have heard those things.
She would have long since been evacuated.
And it is confirmed by Congressman Moomoo right here.
Well, at first she saw me and we waved.
I went into my office and a couple seconds later she knocked and she said, you know, could we come in?
And I said, of course.
Not by the hair of your chinny chin chin.
That looked like a before and after.
Yeah, it really did.
By the way, she saw me and waved.
That sounds like I'm terrified and running for my life, you know, like I'm going to toss a wave to her.
Oh, hi!
That'll run.
It's amazing.
Again, I just went through this timeline.
I've got several here that are all documented.
The sources are available at lotofcredit.com.
122, 139, 144, 144 again, 147 they announced the evacuation was all clear.
And after that is when she heard the hinges and the people making it into the building where she was not.
So basically, you're telling me that yesterday, when we watched this video and we talked about it, I was okay to be skeptical?
It was justifiable?
It was three days ago, but you're drunk.
Wait a minute.
Was it three days ago?
We talked about it on Monday.
That long ago!
This week has flown by.
Right.
And we have a map, I think, too.
This is something else that is pretty important.
Yeah, look at that!
I'm a map!
Shows exactly where the riots were taking place.
Notice the rioters, nowhere near AOC's headquarters location.
There's a street across the street!
There's the mall, there's basically the equivalent to a park, and Bruce Christ is between her and the rioters.
You've watched our Change My Minds.
It's like saying you were in Montana during 9-11.
You're like, I almost died.
I know.
It was a close call.
It's like a David Hogg situation, really.
It really is.
It's a completely different building.
Like, look, I was completely safe, but I was terrified.
Right.
Wow, that sounds awful.
So she was in the cannon building.
It was a Longworth building, where she was not.
The rioters were nowhere near where she was.
And by the way, even what she is just- Why didn't she just use the cannons?
Even what she is describing- Wow.
Are we talking about, like, a canonized text?
We're talking about the Catholic Church?
I don't know.
I don't know.
It's a theology joke.
You both made terrible jokes.
Okay.
So, wasn't even the right building.
That being said, maybe she just, you know, she got confused with her PTSD and was describing what other people experienced in that building.
Here's the thing, we don't really have a lot of video evidence from the intense atmosphere she described in the
building, but this is a video from the exact time.
Shit. Oh my gosh.
Is this where... Terrible.
Is this where Ted Cruz tries to murder her?
I think this is where he breaks in.
Where is AOC?
He's around that corner there.
So that's about what we have and then there is an interview at 323 with Jim Cooper.
So while it was happening.
Again, so this is the closest thing we have to proof of video of it happening inside.
Here you go.
Congressman Jim Cooper, what's the situation in your office right now?
My staff and I are safe inside the office.
Well, son of a bitch.
That doesn't make for good television!
No.
Crap.
We do wish we had one more mask.
That was equivalent to the hell I know!
I don't give a shit!
Some guy out there, we got a soda machine, you're making me do the Zoom call here, I gotta put on pants.
But AOC is rushing to be the victim.
Oh yes.
She is rushing to be the victim.
She doesn't even care if it's true.
Worse than that, the story here is she is so confident that the media will carry her water, she doesn't even care to try and hide it.
Okay, so now she pivoted.
This is the thing.
And this is where I interacted with her on Twitter.
You can follow me on Twitter.
And what's your Twitter there, Dave Landau?
At Landaudave.
At Landaudave.
You're in AOC's crosshairs now.
I apologize.
I don't care.
So then she pivoted, and now she's saying that the pipe bombs.
She's like, well, actually, look, this is the manipulation.
Keep that up so I can read it.
They're manipulating the fact that most people don't know the layout of the complex.
I just showed you the layout.
We are all in the Capitol Complex.
The attack wasn't just on the Dome.
I don't know what you're talking about.
The bombs Trump supporters planted surrounded our offices, too.
Okay, here are some factual inaccuracies.
They haven't found the people who planted the bombs.
We don't have any evidence.
What we do have is two bombs.
They did find two bombs, none of which were anywhere near AOC.
So even for now, doubling back.
Well, actually, okay, look.
It was the door hinges cracking.
And I had to hide in a porta potty.
You were underground, it didn't happen.
I could have been, though!
And then I was in the other building, and then, but then I could have been in this building, and it was, it was pretty scary, and then, and you're freaking out, what about the pipe bombs?
Well, the pipe bombs weren't anywhere near you.
They could have been, though!
What if they were?
What if they were?
Let me show you.
I think we have another map.
This is useful.
Two bombs.
One outside the RNC headquarters.
That's two minutes from AOC's office.
Oh, we have an overlay.
And then the other one was the DNC headquarters.
Seven minutes.
By car, walking.
It's a fast bomb.
I don't know, and it depends if you use Google Maps or MapQuest, or God forbid, Apple Maps.
Don't use that.
It's almost as bad as Berkowitzwiththepets.com.
That's true.
And nothing is close together, by the way, in these buildings.
In Washington, these are massive buildings, so to go from one to the other across the mall is a long walk!
Look, she wasn't close to where any violence happened at the time that it happened, and no pipe bombs were anywhere near her.
Everything she has said is a verifiable falsehood.
I just don't know that I can say lie because she's so stupid.
Being in Washington, D.C., I'm sure she was close to violence, just not that violent.
Right, that's probably true.
I think it's fair to say.
Yeah, absolutely.
But, again, murder.
Either way, someone's stealing a Gran Torino.
It was Ted Cruz that was barging in.
He was dressed as a Capitol policeman.
That end of the story, we haven't waited for.
Well, that was separate.
He was just role-playing as a bobby cop.
That's a bit of fun.
He gets off on truancy.
What's all this then?
You're not where you're supposed to be.
You got a permit for that?
Truancy is Ringo?
I guess.
Now, let me explain to you why this is something that no one else is really talking about, and this is conjecture.
And I do feel bad for AOC.
Why?
I would feel bad if it weren't, and we're going to get to the gun bill by the way, we're talking about inciting violence, if it didn't incite, I'm not going to say incite violence, incite stupidity, incite mental retardation.
That's what we're seeing from AOC.
It discourages critical thinking.
Everything she does is, we need someone to control the voices, we need someone to control what you can hear, we need someone to control your choices as a consumer, we need someone to control the fact checking.
Everything has to be controlled because she doesn't believe that you should be allowed to think for yourself.
You can look at proposed policy.
What car to drive, what house to live in, what city to live in, what public transport, what tweets you can read.
Offices.
Anything!
Take your pick!
She's a child.
I'm not kidding.
She's a kid, and that's the issue.
We're being ran by a child.
We're being run, especially, this is the problem that's so pernicious with feminism, is the women who are the least happy have the most amount of influence over policy that affects women.
And I say this because, look, I think AOC, unlike Whitmer, unlike Nancy Pelosi, who are very smart, who are cunning, and I I'm more afraid of them because they're sharp enough to use a system.
AOC's moral.
And scissors.
Yes.
And glue.
But the issue here is, I don't even remember what I was about to say.
Sorry.
I was gonna say, she hasn't proven herself to be in any way capable of doing the job that she's been assigned to, that she's been elected to by her constituents.
So we've got what, 125,000 I think is how many votes that she got, or somewhere thereabouts of people that have put her there, and now she's trying to shape an entire party?
I think she could.
She's one of the people, unlike Pelosi, unlike those folks, I bet you that in 10-15 years she won't be conservative, but she could become more of a Tulsi Gabbard.
The second she gets any responsibility, if she didn't have the buy-in now, right, where she has a lifetime career, having children, having a family, working in the private sector, just removing herself from suckling at the public dole, at the public teat for the rest of her life, she is a college student who controls our lives and wants an incredible amount of control over your lives.
And the reason she's always dramatic, that she's hyperbolic, is not just because she's AOC, and like you said, she's a child.
But for the same reason that she faked her photo op at the border.
Remember with Kids in Cages?
Remember?
Here it is.
Look, that's what she's looking at.
She's looking at an empty parking lot.
She was looking at an empty parking lot.
Wait a minute.
Newsflash.
The Biden administration, I don't know if you guys saw this, last night reopened those same detention facilities.
And they're basically citing and saying, because we might have amnesty, there are more people sending children with strangers to get across the border so that they could be granted amnesty under Joe Biden.
So hey, unintended consequences.
It's almost like we're doing a repeat of the Flores Consent Policy, which I talked about in the Change My Minds, and why we need to build a wall.
Yeah, well, I think AOC is now on a plane down there to protest those cages being opened up again.
I mean, that would be consistent, at least, if she did that.
Well, I mean, her group built them, which they want to use them for.
Yeah, that was her team.
You build a shark cage, sooner or later you're going to want to see an endangered species.
Yeah, you're like, let's get a great white.
Halfway.
What is she?
I don't know.
I always forget.
It's questionable.
I don't remember.
It's like Jessica Alba.
She's not.
She's not.
She's not tough on anyone.
Well, it's Cortez, so I imagine it's something from Spain.
Dominican?
Is she Dominican?
I don't think she's Dominican.
I don't know.
Why would you assume that?
She's not as dark.
Keep in mind that you are whiter than clear, so you have to be very careful.
I live in a Dominican neighborhood.
Oh, really?
I do, yes.
That narrows it down a bit.
They're a fun people.
But you're in Detroit.
I just don't believe the part that you live in a neighborhood.
No, I live in New York.
Oh, wow.
In Harlem.
My apartment in Harlem is, all my neighbors are Dominican because there's like 15 in each apartment.
I'm kidding, but I'm not.
In Texas, it's just like 19 cars in the driveway.
Oh, I'm sure.
Yeah, and a half back.
But you know why?
Because people, Dominicans and also, not only Dominicans, but also Latin Americans and also a lot of black Americans, they understand, even if you look in the Middle East, they understand something that a lot of Americans have missed.
That's why they have all their family on one street or one apartment, because they know that when stuff goes down, it's not going to be AOC or Biden who's going to save you.
It's your immediate family.
And so they really do value family, which is something that I think a lot of Pseudo-westernized Americans don't appreciate anymore.
They think that government is going to be there to save them.
And the Dominicans are very, yeah, my first stand-up manager was Dominican.
Yeah, no, and all joking aside, they're very nice people.
I like my neighborhood.
And I just don't, she doesn't look Dominican to me.
Perhaps that is jumping the gun.
It could be jumping the gun.
As long as she's not Chech.
No tolerance for the Chech.
Well, so isn't AOC, what she's doing right now, basically like one of your children who's under the age of 10 years old running into the room and crying and saying that Tommy hit her, and you know, okay, you go find out what happened, right?
And she basically ran in because Tommy looked at her wrong.
Right.
You know, and it's like, isn't there a parent, isn't there somebody that's going to go, wait a minute, this isn't true.
Right.
And you keep doubling down on it.
Somebody needs to ground her.
No, it's more like a guy coming back from summer vacation and telling everybody he got laid by a woman who clearly doesn't exist.
Right.
Yeah.
She's like, no, you should have met her.
Her name was Becky.
Chair glasses.
She lives in Canada where they got better public schooling.
She's from Chile.
Not the food.
The only thing I don't like is she really has it out for Peruvians.
It may not work out.
We almost died.
It's wrong to hate.
In the country next to us, there was a revolt.
She's not honest.
She has a hole in her soul.
She has a void, and this is a lot of feminists, too.
Listen, if you want to work, great.
Carly Fiorina, who I'm very disappointed in now, but she described feminism, I think, more articulately and succinctly than anyone I've ever heard before.
She said, feminism is the ability to make a choice.
You want to work?
Go ahead and work.
You want to be a stay-at-home mom?
Be a stay-at-home mom.
And most women are happier being mothers.
Not all, but a lot of women would like that option, and we don't have We don't have it now.
We don't necessarily have it now because of sort of how fast our society is and in the dual income household, more so, not that you couldn't have it, but because people think they need things that they don't necessarily need.
And that's a big underlying issue with AOC.
And let me show you some inconsistency here.
Again, she doesn't understand that the internet is forever, largely because I don't think she knows that she's hitting record.
It's the button that says play, sweetheart.
Where it's always been.
It was Congressman Mumu said that AOC was just saying, I just hope I get to be a mom.
I don't want to die, which honestly breaks my heart.
Here's her saying that.
And she said, I just hope I get to be a mom.
I hope I don't die today.
Did I buy that inflatable projector screen from SkyMall?
Here's the thing, that's sad to me.
Yeah, it is.
But AOC has toxified many young women for years, for decades to come, by selling them the lie that it may be morally unacceptable for women to have children due to her raison d'être.
Climate change, here she is.
Basically, like, there's scientific consensus that the lives of children are going to be very difficult, and it does lead, I think, young people to have a legitimate question.
No, you lead them!
Is it okay to still have children?
Also, just this basic moral question, like, what do we do?
And even if you don't have kids, there are still children here in the world, and we have a moral obligation to them.
How are you fulfilling your moral obligation?
By spending my money on new infrastructure with a five-page deal that takes over 60% of the economy?
Sweetheart, honestly, what are you doing for the children?
I don't think she's doing anything.
Maybe she had a moment of clarity at the end.
Maybe she was really afraid.
I highly doubt all of this.
But maybe she had a moment of clarity and was like, good!
Maybe I could survive today and be a mother.
That's fantastic.
Run with that.
That's life.
And make sure you tell your constituents.
Exactly.
You can still have the job of being a congresswoman.
Just do it better.
And you know what?
You can still have your coyote ugly tabletop dance.
No one's gonna stop you from doing that as a mom!
That's yours!
It's a genre!
You were about to say something there, huh?
Oh, I was just saying that she's always asking a question, and we also have kids here, and there's children on Earth, and I don't... Is she making a sandwich as well?
Like, she's walking around off camera?
Like, you're saying, yeah, we can't have kids, oh yeah, there's kids on Earth.
She put this out there, like, what she said made any sense.
Like, she saw this and was like, this is something the world should know.
Right.
It is important.
I want to leave my stamp on this world.
I want people to know I'm an idiot.
Yes!
I want people to know that I've encouraged young women to not have children because of climate change.
And this is the issue too, right?
I hope that people are understanding now.
I was labeled for a long time a climate change denier, or global warming denier.
Look, I'm not.
Les, you're going to talk about the world temperature going up 1.6 degrees?
Okay.
My issue is not with the idea that the climate is changing.
It's not even with the idea that humans may be some contributing force on some level to that temperature change.
I'm not saying it is, I'm not saying it isn't, but I do think that's a conversation to be had.
I think that it is far more reasonable for someone to maintain that position and say, if it is a catastrophic, world-ending problem, AOC hasn't got a shot in hell of fixing it for us!
And so I don't want to sign on to her bill.
It's the political ramifications that take control over your lives and, by the way, kill countless people in third-world countries that I have a problem with.
And if you question that, she labels you a science denier.
If you question her story, she says you're a hate speaker, you're inciting violence.
This is a woman who says if you don't believe her five-page Green New Deal bill, which we read, you're a science denier.
Who also believes in double masks, by the way, and tried to claim that Ted Cruz is Ted Bundy.
Exactly.
Most of that five pages is just drawings and turnovers by numbers.
Yeah, it's really bad.
I have a quick update related to the story.
So lawmakers will share their personal stories about the attack tonight and AOC will kick off the special order hour, so it's a real therapy session.
Nice little circle jerk.
That must be that new age lying therapy.
Tune in tonight while we all lie.
But here's the thing.
It's a purge!
We're gonna get together at the long... I was about to say Longhorn.
We're gonna get together tonight at the Dome, take some ayahuasca, and purge ourselves by lying relentlessly!
I hope they're all around a campfire.
Making sacrifices.
Elizabeth Warren's bringing the Zima, a teepee, and just the SEC prosecutors.
She's bringing a beaver pelt blanket for everybody.
I made these.
I brought the Gilders!
Can the Republicans and all the cities that burned to the ground and the countless dozens of people who died and the billions of dollars in damage and the officers... Can we have maybe something about them over the summer or did we just all forget that?
Of course we all forgot that.
Didn't happen.
No, it didn't happen.
Here's the thing.
It doesn't matter because the rioters from Black Lives Matter, the rioters from Antifa, they were targeting businesses that had nothing to do with it.
They were targeting other victims, right?
And by the way, like I said, people are going in there and invading Nancy Pelosi's office.
I think it's crap.
I think that those people who committed crimes obviously need to be held accountable for their crimes.
But to act as though one is entirely acceptable, where they were attacking businesses that had nothing to do with their perceived slights, versus people who, wrong, obviously discouraging violence, but you can understand if they were upset what they saw as at least targeting people who had influenced and who had, you know, shorted the game for them.
I'm just saying, if you're going to actually look at it and say, okay, where is the... all the anger is misplaced.
And my biggest problem, too, with this insurrection is it's really dumb.
Like, people who think, like, oh, I'm gonna do something.
You're the Flintstones... you're the bad guy lackey.
The boss!
They're trying to go into Capitol Building, boss!
You dummies, they're just gonna arrest you!
You set us back nine years!
That's the real problem with it, not to mention that it's morally reprehensible.
Protesting, for example, let's just take the protesting, the words.
Marching on the Capitol is still very, it's much more sensible when you are saying, hey, they are not admitting this evidence, we think that Washington D.C.
is a corrupt town with politicians who are looking out for their own self-interest versus marching down a street and Molotov cocktailing businesses.
Right.
Hey, you weren't the one hiding in a bathroom four blocks away.
It's true.
The door was hinging!
It was hinging!
Did they crack?
How do hinges crack?
I don't know.
I think that was a poor choice of words.
Apparently she lived in the house from Annabelle.
What bathroom door just swivels?
Would you look at a church basement where it's like a pony wall?
Take a peek, boys, it doesn't shut all the way.
No, no, I'll pass.
Oh, okay, by the way, we also have one other story here while we're fact-checking, because we've been talking about- No, no, no, we're lying.
We're not fact-checking.
These are all lies.
Yeah, by the way, everything I just said is a lie.
There weren't two pipe bombs, there were 500, and they were all under AOC's bed.
Yeah.
Sure.
Everything I just said is bullshit.
I'm glad you brought that back up.
But something else too, if you look at the timeline of Donald Trump's speech, this is what they're trying to do.
Speech is violence.
Speech is inciting violence.
Donald Trump saying fight like hell or you won't have a country anymore even though he said peacefully and he said you need to He was very clear, patriotically, peacefully.
I understand Donald Trump shoots from the hip.
He doesn't speak very articulately.
But to argue that he actually encouraged people to commit any acts of violence is silly.
I won't go along with you down that trail.
I don't care if you demand that I say it or threaten to ban me.
Fine.
See you in court.
Okay?
He didn't incite violence.
He didn't even come close to encouraging violence.
That being said, if you look at the timeline, this is something else that we did the math
when his speech ended versus when the actual actions of violence occurred on the state
Tocanowan, you were telling me, yeah.
Washington.
Yeah, so on the 6th, Donald Trump's speech ended at 110 p.m.
Eastern, and then the rioting began at 111 p.m.
111 p.m.
Real close.
That's 1.8 miles away.
It's 1.8 miles away.
So assuming that Donald Trump even said, look, burn it down!
The 5th of November!
Remember?
Assuming that he even said that, they would have had to run 1.8 miles.
1.8 miles in one minute.
And the world record is like three minutes and 43 seconds.
For one mile.
Super fast, but yeah, for one mile.
For one mile.
And so, because the guy with the walrus mustache at Mythbusters isn't interested in doing his job anymore, we've decided to put it to the test and see if it is actually physically possible to make that happen.
Of course, I hurt my knee, so we go now to the running of the interns.
Okay, so, uh, Tokenon, we have them.
We have them waiting right now.
We're going to be, we're just going to start them.
They're going to be running a one minute mile, a 1.8 minute mile, and they're, they're running to the studio.
Then we'll have them in the studio later on to see how long.
The interns.
Okay.
All right.
Let's check in with them.
Are you guys ready?
There they go.
Okay.
I don't know if they can hear me right now.
Oh, there's, we got, okay.
Get set.
Oh, well, that's a rough start.
That's a token.
That one has a twin.
Whoa, that's crazy.
Okay, one other story I wanted to hit really quickly, unless I think we're done with AOC.
On their way here, yeah.
Elon Musk.
This is a real story.
Yep.
It's my boy.
Okay?
And I think this is important just to touch on because it's proof positive to me why nationalism is the most potent form of anti-racism that exists, but exclusively in the United States.
So, Elon Musk, he's under investigation right now, and you know why?
I do.
Being good.
Being the best ever.
We were talking about this the other day, how I was wrong about Donald Trump on a lot of fronts.
I was also wrong about Elon Musk.
I like Elon Musk.
He's a billionaire playing with his money.
He's a billionaire playing with his money.
And doing cool stuff.
I think he kind of used the system a little bit with the green subsidies.
But then when you look into how the system is rigged for the big three, it's not even close.
And the fact that Elon Musk, the greenest entrepreneur throughout the history of modern mankind, that I can think of anyway, um, had to leave California, flip them the bird to run his
green company from Texas.
It's just a feel-good story of the year.
It's just beautiful.
But he's actually under investigation. This is according to the DOJ in March 2020,
a non-US citizen inquiring about a position of technology strategy associate.
That's a mouthful. A job at SpaceX.
he was asked about his citizenship status.
DOJ attorney Lisa Sandoval stated that SpaceX ultimately failed to hire him for the position
because he is not a US citizen or lawful permanent resident.
Hold on a second.
Elon Musk is under investigation for asking for papers so that he would not be breaking
the law?
Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's...
And this is why, this is why nationalism, because that little South, that little African American, more African American than you, ironically, and more American!
American than that commie broad AOC because he understands what the United States of America is
Nationalism is not a racial identity here in the United States. It's about ID
It's about our ideals here. And that's why someone like an African American Elon Musk
I want him on our America team more than I want white privileged professor commies
Okay, the only way yes to successfully vaccinate people against racism is
Internationalism with an identity centered on wills and principles and a shared identity
coalescing under freedom Elon Musk, your first draft for us.
Absolutely.
I can't believe they're investigating him for upholding the law.
And by the way, he's being investigated because he asked the question.
You can't ask that question.
I don't understand.
People always say they go, why do you want to punish illegal immigrants?
How about the business owners who hire them?
Right, yeah.
Elon Musk is like, show me your papers there.
And they're like, okay, this is illegal.
How is that not a good thing?
It's a great thing.
Are you sure your social security number is 123456?
I'm gonna double check, are you sure?
It's a great thing for American workers, and by the way, even if you want to grant citizenship to every single caravan that can get into a 98 Dodge sauntering on up to the border, it's a good thing for working conditions for migrants, because they're on the books!
That's what you guys told me about sanctuary cities, that they'd be afraid to go to the cops if they're here illegally!
Don't we want people on the books?
You don't give a rat's ass about union jobs!
You don't even want Americans to have jobs!
The game is rigged.
Yeah, and if you look deeper into that story, they actually requested a lot of files from him, and the company gave the files that they requested that pertain to this specific incident, but then they're like, no, no, no, no, we want everything.
They probably gave the files and complied because they didn't think there could possibly be anything controversial.
No, they had to, it was a court order, fine, you have to in their discovery process, but they were like, no, no, no, we want all of the No, but what I'm saying is if I'm Elon Musk and they go, hey, we want to make sure that you are not employing illegal immigrants.
And by that, we want to make sure you're employing illegal immigrants.
Okay, so hold on, hold on.
So no illegal immigrants get hired.
Fine, got you.
And I'm supposed to determine that how?
I can't ask the question, so what's the next step for me?
Just walk me through this.
I just, you know what, this is why nationalism is an antidote to racism.
It's an antidote to ethnocentrism.
I don't care what Elon Musk looks like.
It's kind of weird.
It is.
He's doing good work.
It's kind of weird.
Kind of weird looking dude.
He's American in my book.
He's making it work.
That's what I wanted to say.
That African American, who by the way, I hope he got some of that African American grant money.
Yeah, true, yeah.
We haven't even looked into that.
And Charlize Theron.
She got some.
She did. She got some.
And everyone at TLC got those midget money grants.
Did you know that?
She tells everybody she's African American and it's like, that's cute, you're not.
She really is.
Sorta.
She was born in Africa.
She's not by her standards.
She's not by her linguistic standards where people want to say it's not black, it's African-American.
Charlize Theron and Elon Musk.
Well no, not that African-American.
Wasn't she kind of on the wrong side over there?
True.
If you count the killings.
I think everyone's on the wrong side over there.
They haven't gotten it right ever.
That's true.
It's a dark continent.
It's just a pendulum swinging of genocide.
They just brought back farmers because they're like, sorry we killed you, but how do you grow stuff?
We really need to know, we're kinda hungry.
Well, we start by not primarily planting in sand.
Yes.
Tell us more.
Yes, yes.
Let me write this down.
This baby cure AIDS.
Please put it down.
Put it down.
Not underground.
Just put it somewhere safe.
Cultural differences.
I think actually we're going to be checking in with our interns before we move on to The new gun bill that's being put into the House, which a lot of people aren't paying attention to because they're focusing on Representative Greene right now, right?
You see this on CNN.
Focus on Greene!
Focus on removing her from committees because she believes some crazy stuff, granted.
Let's not focus on removing your Second Amendment rights, which is of course sitting here before the House.
Do we have the interns?
Are they still running?
They're still on their way?
Okay, there we go!
Running of the interns!
They're here!
We got them back!
Alright, what was the time finally?
They didn't make that.
No.
There's absolutely no way that they made that.
There's no way.
Did you, so, okay.
You think it's possible?
That was much longer.
Hey, one thing that's completely unrelated, um, uh, Bryce, show them what you can do with your, uh, with your knees here.
Look at his, yeah, get the camera here.
Look, he can walk with his feet backwards.
What?
Watch this.
Watch this.
Oh!
Disgusting!
Isn't that disgusting?
Freak!
Oh, gosh.
American Horror Story episode.
And the internet is forever.
Okay, well you guys made it.
Where's, uh, where's, where's Thomas, uh, where's Finnegan?
Did we lose him?
Did we lose Finnegan?
Is that Thomas Finnegan?
You there?
Steven?
Yeah?
Can you set me up with Gabby?
What are you talking about?
You need car insurance?
I need insurance, Steven.
What's happening, Thomas?
Finnegan, talk to us.
Can you come get me?
No, I can't come get you.
I have to host a show.
But, uh, it sounds... Did you hurt yourself?
Did he hurt him?
Did Thomas Finnegan hurt himself?
Sounds winded.
Okay, alright.
Well, it doesn't sound very good.
Now, Thomas Finnegan, I think you need to go call a doctor.
Gabby's not gonna help you right now.
Oh, my God.
Oh, geez.
Okay.
Thomas, take care of yourself.
Yeah.
You know what?
One of you guys go back and get Thomas.
All right.
We'll see you guys later.
Gabby, by the way, it's not, you don't just get health insurance from Gabby.
What Gabby does, like car insurance, I save a ton of money.
I've talked about this.
It just allows you to compare insurance rates, especially if you've been having insurance for a very long time.
You don't realize they just keep upping the rates.
Just check it out.
Go to, I think, what is it?
The promo is...
We always have.
Gabby.com slash Crowder.
That's right.
And you can actually check it for free.
So you can just check your current car insurance rates and just save money.
Because what people don't realize is they bank on you not actually watching your race going up.
Yeah.
So Gabby.com slash Crowder.
But it's not going to help Thomas Finnegan right now.
No.
No, it's not.
It really is.
I saved a lot of money.
I felt very stupid.
Um, for having not used it.
Okay.
I feel stupid.
Uh, what else do we have here?
I don't know.
We have some other things to talk about.
The gun bill.
Okay.
That's going to piss us off.
I guess we have to wait for last, right?
Yeah.
Uh, this is HR 127.
I don't know if you guys are paying attention to this.
And by the way, comment, that's the best thing you can do.
If you're watching this on an archive stream, just comment right now.
You can't do it live because we don't want all the crazy people commenting live and then YouTube holding us liable because different standards.
You guys are crazy.
But comment if you've been following this bill, HR 127.
It's an insane gun bill, and no one's been talking about it because they've been talking about it.
They talk about GameStop, and they talk about Green, right here, and they're not talking about people being arrested for memes, or bills that will remove your ability to defend yourself amidst some of the most violent uprisings we've seen in our country.
So, January 4th, this was two days before the Capitol riot.
The piece of gun legislation was introduced to the House.
And Nancy Pelosi advocated for extra security.
So this kind of gained steam, right?
This gun bill, because Pelosi was... I want to know when we considered inciting violence, where she was saying we need more security measures because of the enemy within.
Hmm.
Enemy within?
Do you have that clip?
Clip eye.
I do believe, and I have said this all along, that we will probably need a supplemental for more security for members when the enemy is within the House of Representatives.
Yeah, that sounds like what you're saying.
We can get the lights from the interns coming in.
I can't really see.
This looks like it was directed by Tim Burton, doesn't it?
This is America.
Violent rhetoric for unity.
Yeah.
Unity.
The enemy is within.
Right.
What does that mean?
Can you define enemy?
Yeah.
I know that you guys are a little bit loose with definitions of definitions, but enemy seems like it would be caustic.
Yes.
And by the way, if I identify this enemy, what actions are now okay for me to take to deal with this enemy?
Right?
Because you're basically just telling me we have an enemy that has to be dealt with.
Okay.
What?
How do I deal with them?
Listen, I understand if you say, for example, this is the problem with some dangerous conspiracy that you do see on the right and the left, but I think you see far more on the left, because the left accuses everyone who disagrees with them of being Nazis.
You have a very small contingency of radicals on the right who think that some people need to be hung for treason when they don't necessarily need to be hung for treason.
That being said, it's not nearly as pernicious as you see AOC refer to all Trump supporters as white supremacists.
You just saw Nancy Pelosi refer to Republicans as enemies within.
And so when you paint your opposition as Nazis, as fascists, as enemies within, look, I don't think anyone would hold it against you if an actual Nazi with a swastika on his arm walked in and Dave Landau punched him in the face.
Listen right, why would I punch my brethren in the face?
I should've known by the jacket.
I would've pulled down my shirt and been like, you are welcome.
We gotta check him.
We gotta check because now we are removed.
He regrets it.
It was one drunken night.
It really was.
But like the internet, tattoos last forever.
So here's the thing that's important.
The sponsor of the bill, by the way.
Like herpes.
The founder of the feast.
I got them both that night.
I'm kidding.
I don't have them.
I don't have tattoos.
He's more concerned with you knowing that he doesn't have herpes in his chest, not being a white supremacist.
No, I meant tattoos.
No, I have tattoos.
And herpes.
and a strong belief in white supremacy.
**laughter** This is why you're getting audited, Dave.
This is a joke.
Hey guys, come on.
Welcome Ed Norton.
Oh look, Pelosi's back on with another mask right now.
She's holding as Democrats prepare to hold vote to strip Representative Greene from committee roles.
Look, I haven't done a bunch of digging into Greene because I have found some things that I don't like, that I disagree with.
That being said, I don't think that people need to be stripped for wrong think just because Because.
That's it.
There needs to be a process.
So she's absolutely wrong, but can we get to the anti-Semitism from Omar and Tlaib?
Is that something that is equivalent to saying that maybe 9-11 was a false flag?
You mispronounced marrying your brother.
But while we're talking about radicals, they're talking about Green.
Okay, let me give you that.
Just so we can, for the sake of argument.
Okay, Green, let's say Radical, you guys want to go through the process and get rid of her, and you go through the processes and the channels that exist.
Okay, listen, that's your prerogative.
Alright, fine.
But can we also address, while we're talking about this gun bill, the founder of the Feast, the lady who helped draft this bill, Sheila Jackson Lee, let her explain in her own words, while we're talking about Crazy Radical and it gets worse, what it means, this bill.
My bill that I've introduced dealing with the caliber weapon, I've held an AR-15 in my hand.
I wish I had it.
It is as heavy as- I wish I had it.
Ten boxes that you might be moving.
Uh, and the- Ten boxes!
Tan!
A .50 caliber, these kinds of bullets, uh, need to be licensed and do not need to be on the street.
Did she- did that- Did Aunt Jemima there just say that the AR-15 fires 50 cal?
She did, she just did.
Did she just say that?
Yeah, she did.
I think she said that's the first pearl necklace she's worn since 1965.
Did she just say that it fires 50 cal?
Does anyone, do you have any idea what a 50 cal is?
Do you have any idea?
An AR-15 the size, it's just, this just shows, this woman is drafting a bill, which we will go through, seize entire control of your ability to protect you and yours, right?
It's your God-given right, without even knowing.
Anything about basic firearms.
Not only that, while we're talking about radical, either she is so mind-numbingly dumb that she shouldn't be anywhere near a pen, let alone a piece of legislation, or she holds the radical view, as recently as 2010, that there are still two Vietnams.
Today we have two Vietnams, side by side, north and south, exchanging and working.
And then on the capital step she did this.
What?
What does that mean?
It gets worse!
It gets worse!
Do you mean the country?
The war?
Talk about the haves up in the bottom.
I don't know.
That means nothing.
I think she thinks there are two Vietnams in 2000.
And by the way, they're north and south.
They can't be side by side.
Are you thinking Germany?
There's so much wrong with it.
It's like with AOC where you were getting all off track on pipe bombs and creaky doors and that's because that's what she said.
And now you're like side by side in longitude.
What am I a sailor?
I don't know.
Speaking of travel, this is another true story about representative Sheila.
Is it Sheila Jackson Lee?
I want to make sure I get it right.
Three names.
She went the other way on that one instead of one name.
She stole a first class seat on a flight Uh, from a human rights activist.
Modern-day Rosa Parks.
And then accused her of being racist.
It really is.
Modern-day Rosa Parks.
I agree.
She's like, this is my seat.
Now this bill is making more sense.
Yeah.
She's retarded.
She's like, listen, you paid $300 for this.
This is mine now.
This is mine.
Ma'am, your ticket is A30.
You're racist.
We landed first class.
First class landed on me.
This is what Jesse Jackson and Kevin Smith were talking about.
I guess I know how Rosa felt.
Okay, so let's, to be fair, she's crazy, but the views in the bill are not that crazy.
Again, the bill, we have all of these sources available at lateralthecutter.com.
I want to make sure, I think we have the bill right up on the website, right?
H.R.
127, all the pages are numbered there.
Were you laughing at H.R.?
Who steals first class?
Hold on, it was in California, squatters rights, she was there first, you have to go through a process.
I think we should have Dave do this and have a hidden camera and just see how it goes.
I will 100% do this.
I will have no problem.
against the window.
Like the episode of Twilight Zone with the thing on the wing.
You see it?
I think we should have Dave do this and have a hidden camera and just see how it goes.
I will 100% do this.
I will have no problem.
It's time for your white ass to be a stowaway.
That's right.
Snakes on a plane.
Always bet on black.
Taking your seat when you... This is Black Snake.
I'm going home.
Get out the seat, bitch.
Everything about that story is funny.
What's not funny is the control that this lady has over you.
You don't need to be sorry.
Dave's apologetically laughing.
It is so funny!
If we didn't laugh at this, we would use our remaining firearms and place them promptly in our mouths.
And they're very heavy.
10 boxes worth.
She's a light packer though.
Can I get some soda to wash down these delicious first class nuts?
I'm taking the champagne.
I got to get first class because I got to get my carry-on first for my AR-15 50 cal.
You know... Can't fit that shit in a Samsonite, bitch!
How am I gonna check a bag with insulin needles?
I got the sugar.
Listen, if I can't pack a bag with insulin needles, you best be ready to pack a bag carrying my foot.
Doctor said he gonna take my feet, and that ain't gonna happen.
And you know what?
Once we take the foot, I'm below my BMI weight, and so the irony is not lost on my ass!
GET OUT THE SEAT BITCH!
Woo!
Okay.
This plane's going to Denver.
Uh-uh, it's going to Florida.
It's going to Mar-a-Lago.
I got a connecting flight to a private island.
That's right.
Got a big-ass shower.
I'm gonna get me a massage.
Okay.
Okay.
Two Vietnams.
I'm gonna get back to this.
Okay.
She's crazy, but so is former Vice President Joe Biden, right?
Because he ran on a platform that would ban all online firearm sales and semi-automatic weapons that can hold more than three rounds because he thinks you only need a double barrel shotgun.
By the way, semi-automatic is One pull of a trigger, bang, bang.
I know you're not a gun guy, so I'll give you some... You can actually react to these, because I think you own firearms.
I do own, yeah.
But you're not like a hobbyist.
No, no.
He grew up in Detroit.
That's true.
I think they issue it at birth.
Yeah, I've heard many go off.
And I've also had many pulled on me in places I wasn't supposed to be.
Well, the tattoo doesn't help.
No, it doesn't.
Well, yeah, that's true.
You shouldn't be sunbathing.
No, well... I get it!
Indian Village needs some entertainment in the lockdown, too!
Few Polish gays in Detroit got that.
So, this is what's in the bill.
This bill from Sheila Jackson.
Polish, by the way, is not their ethnicity.
Here's in the bill, a database, nationwide, for licensing possession of firearms and ammunition would be made accessible to law enforcement and the public.
So, there you go, Antifa, Black Lives Matter, can know where all the gun owners live.
Well it wasn't even that, it was the ammunition as well.
The ammunition.
If you buy ammunition.
So if you buy a firearm, and you buy ammunition, you would be put on a public registry that everyone could access.
And go, oh Dave, Dave, ah, tattoo not so funny now, first class and all the way to your ass!
Sex offenders have more privacy than you would if you were on this list.
Not from me.
I know how to find the sex offenders.
You're quite wily.
I ding dong ditch sex offenders.
I'm a vigilante with it.
No, I was just saying I'm not worried.
I bought mine out of a brown paper bag and mine was a Black Lives Matter t-shirt.
Serial number script.
I do understand seeing through your tank top how this could come back to bite me, but I got a good feeling about you.
I like you.
Paying top dollar.
So your employees who don't like you if you're a business owner, your nosy neighbors, the Karens of the world, I mean we've seen people dragged out and cuffed because they were walking their dogs in countries with lockdown rules.
What do you think is going to happen when moms demand action know that they live next door to a revolver owner and it's public?
Well, it's also like a list for thieves to go, okay, well they've got all these guns, I'm gonna break in there and take all your guns and now they're in the criminal's hands.
Genius!
They might as well just tell them where you keep them.
And like how long it would be for you to get the combination and protect your family?
And how long before you need to recharge your ring doorbell battery?
And for everybody out there saying people have better things to do than worry about that, you remember when people were being exposed for donating to the Republican Party and pressure was being applied that they be fired or have to step down from their positions of leadership in companies?
They don't have better things to do!
No, they don't have better things.
Until it turned out to be half of Beverly Hills.
Fresh Prince was not an accurate depiction of the African-American experience.
Charlize Theron was full of shit.
So, this is also in the bill.
Again, we have it at ladderwithcreditor.com, so you can read all of it.
It's hundreds of pages.
But this is, I believe, from page 416.
I have it in front of me here.
Obtaining a license for a firearm, by the way.
You would require a psychological evaluation involving members of your household and any
ex-spouses.
This is what they've said.
That ain't fair, man.
Okay, first off, I don't agree with some general, just generic psych evaluation because who's
determining the evaluation?
If you need an Ambien to sleep or if you need a Xanax, can you not own a firearm?
But let's say, okay, because the left wants to say that the right is fringe radical and that they're centrist, okay, let's say it was a centrist point of view to pass a psych evaluation.
Let's even say that some people might believe it's sensible for you to be able to protect yourself from criminals, violent criminals and rioters in your neighborhood, that this psych evaluation would require members of your family, like an intervention.
At a certain point, they're still shoehorning ex-spouses!
But how about, yeah, this is a sentence you've never heard, I'm a wonderful person, just ask my ex-wife.
Right, exactly!
Right, Stephen, you would fail it on this.
Stephen, do you feel like people are out to get you?
Yeah, I know.
That would be a common question.
You could answer yes!
This is getting close to home because Gerald knows that at one point I was almost, people thought I was psychotic.
Because I had a question like, do you think, do you have the impending feeling that people want to hurt you?
I'm like, I had just gotten off the phone with the FBI.
The entire country of Pakistan?
Yeah, yeah, I kind of did, like, interesting.
Do you feel the constant pressure to perform as though everyone's watching you?
OK, wait a second.
I know where this is going.
I can see this.
It's my nightmare.
It's not going to work.
But even getting asked that question, it's like, well, yeah, what's your end goal in that question?
I feel like you're kind of out to get me.
Right.
Yeah, exactly.
It does seem.
And well, you know what?
I guess maybe we'll put you down for 22 in nine months.
But that's about as far as we're willing to go.
Here's a mace.
Do you feel that people might hurt you?
Yeah, that's why I wanted the gun.
That's kind of the point.
Quite the quandary.
Hey kid, do you know karate?
Have you thought about karate?
Check out the local Y.
Cobra Kai is now on Netflix.
You don't even have to pay for it at YouTube Red.
I'm sure you could get some from there.
Just hand your final paperwork to my security guard on the way out, and we'll be sure to be in touch.
Also, by the way, comment.
That's the best thing you can do.
We've said it before.
It's the best thing you can do.
Comment if you've read this bill, H.R.
127.
Most Mud Club members, by the way, have not passed a psych evaluation, and I love every last one of you.
Where do you go to read the bill?
I went to the Congressional website and it was not on there.
We have the PDF, I think.
That's what we try and do, even though this is a comedy show.
I'm held to a different standard because I might get banned for saying it's crazy.
They might be like, oh my gosh, did you... You know what they might ban you for is implying that she resembles Aunt Jemima.
That's what they'll say.
They'll say that's an immutable characteristic.
Not all black women!
I don't say that about Kerry Washington!
What do you want her to do since she lost her job?
I know.
She's got to do something else?
Right.
White people ruin everything.
Where's Uncle Ben?
Here's something else in the bill.
Well, there's so many things in the bill.
Let me just kind of rattle this off.
We'll take the whole show to cover, okay?
You'd have to submit a notice to the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms, and Explosives.
I call it Party City.
Notify the Attorney General.
Uh, when one wants to loan a firearm, if you want to do that.
There'd be a mandatory 24-hour training for obtaining a gun license.
There'd be an annual $800 gun insurance fee required.
An additional license for military-style weapons, which if you actually know the assault weapons ban act, just means a pistol grip versus a vertical grip.
And by the way, Joe Biden thinks anything that isn't Elmer Fudd's shotgun is a military-style assault weapon.
A ban on 10-round magazines, ban on .50 cal, which is just so, because she thinks that's an AR-15.
Try and fit it in.
She's just trying to fit in.
It won't fit!
The bullet will not fit!
That's because it's a round and that's the wrong gun.
You must not allow it.
You best not be sitting in first class.
That's mossy!
Does this one have kung fu grip?
Penalties?
Do you know what the penalties are?
$5,000 to $7,000.
Are you serious?
$5,000 to $7,000.
And this is the thing.
Who does this hurt the most?
Look, where are police response times the worst in the country?
In Detroit.
Where are people not able to afford private jets like John Kerry?
Or security details like Sheila Jackson Lee?
And so their Great Equalizer, namely for women and the weak and frail, is what has once been referred to as the Great Equalizer.
If you were to craft a bill to guarantee that women, black women, in inner cities have no defense from would-be rapists, you'd be hard-pressed to create something better than this.
Yeah, absolutely.
By the way, let's ask everybody who was in the Capitol building on January 6th if they would have felt better if they had had a sidearm with them because the Capitol police were overwhelmed.
You don't even have to go to the country to worry about response times.
Let's go to downtown LA during the riots this summer when the police basically left entire areas in New York and Chicago and Portland and Seattle.
It's just amazing to me when people say, oh, that's what the cops are for.
Have you ever had a situation where the cops didn't show up immediately like kazoo?
Like, what do you think just happens?
It's like, oh my god, someone's in my house!
And you're just gonna show up like, Will, you should've had a 45, dum-dum!
What do you think happens?
We'll be there in three to five minutes, good luck.
Or like Reginald Denny, who's now a penguin wrangler in the Arctic.
I'm trying to think, Reginald...Rambo, right?
No, Reginald.
Oh, Reginald pulled out of the truck!
Who am I to think he was trained to make things with bankability?
The Watts Riots, they gave him an old brick today.
Yeah, that's right, they pulled him out of there.
No, it's just, it's amazing!
These, this is something, look, we can't afford security details, okay?
We can't afford... I can't afford a private jet.
So I usually fly coach.
You're not John Kerry.
I can't afford... I usually steal first class.
I can't afford a private security detail everywhere I go.
So I have a Joe Louis, and I have some firearms.
These folks are so out of touch, they don't understand how the rest of America lives.
You're only convenient to them when they need some kind of a union voting bloc or to convince you that Trump voters are white supremacists.
Why do you think that there was lower black unemployment under Donald Trump than ever before?
Why do you think there was lower violence until the riots occurred under Donald Trump than ever before?
Because, truth, for as bombastic as he is, he's too bombastic to be paying attention to color.
He's like, all right, no taxes, what about black communities?
I don't care, they get the same thing.
They get the same thing as the white guys.
That's a novel approach.
That's strange.
And one thing that you really did hit on, though, is a lot of these fines, like the five to seven thousand dollars, these are based on their own ludicrous salaries that they can easily afford than what any other American can actually come up with.
$800 a year just to insure it.
But what do you get for the insurance, did it even say?
Well, listen, what do you expect?
You're talking about an administration that put more, this VP put more non-violent marijuana offenders behind bars than I can think of.
Well, they were good labor.
Yeah.
She's walking reefer madness, okay?
And now she wants to do an about-face.
And this is what they want her to do now.
They now want to strip minorities and people in communities who can't afford private security details and have bad police response times of even being able to exercise their god-given right to self-preservation.
I'm pissed off, so let's go.
Listen, everyone here, you can comment if you're watching on YouTube.
For those who are Mug Club members, we're going to be taking your chat.
We have Manny the Police Sketch Artist.
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