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Dec. 15, 2017 - Louder with Crowder

01:17:10

#274 DID ROY MOORE DOOM THE GOP?? Clint Howard and Blaire White Guest | Louder With Crowder

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	Look who I found.
	I have nowhere to go.
	Hopper!
	Hopper!
	What?
	You mean, you miss me?
	Hopper, of course we missed you, buddy.
	But I thought you didn't want me no more now that you have SimpliSafe and I'm a guard dog.
	SimpliSafe is just as much for dogs as anything else.
	You're the most important thing in the house.
	I'll never leave.
	You mean it?
	Hopper!
	You're such a good boy!
	SimpliSafe can never replace you!
	Yeah!
	We can work together!
	SimpliSafe can help make me a better guard dog!
	Of course it can't replace me!
	I don't know what I was thinking!
	SimpliSafe can help monitor and warn, but it can't scare and bite at bad guys like Hopper can...
	Oh no!
	Buggers!
	Quick!
	Run, everybody!
	They can't catch us all!
	Last week for the promo, we do one live read per week.
	Usually it's for Mug Club unless we have an awesome sponsor.
	Last week, simplisafe.com slash credit.
	SimpliSafe is the home security system.
	I think I told you I've had home security systems before, mostly because I moved into a house and they were already in there.
	They were wired.
	They sucked.
	And so I relied on Hopper.
	I put too much stress on his shoulders.
	So SimpliSafe has an entirely wireless system.
	You can hook it up.
	It's awesome.
	I think it won CNET and TechRadar, won all kinds of awards.
	It's $15 a month, no contract.
	And if you order right now at SimpliSafe.com slash Crowder, you still get 10% off.
	This is the last week of the promo, I believe, going into Christmas.
	So if you don't need a home security system, then okay, you don't need a home.
	Don't buy one.
	If you live in a place that is...
	If you live next to the Hope Diamond...
	You're probably fine.
	But if you do or you've ever thought about getting a home security system, I will tell you, I'll vouch for this.
	And I'm not just doing the radio thing where people vouch for products that they never use.
	That's why we have so few sponsors.
	I use it.
	I like it.
	I have family and friends who use it and like it.
	It is the easiest home security system to install and the most reliable.
	But don't take my word for it, said LeVar Burton.
	Well, you don't need to take the word of a six-year-old kid reading a pop-out book either.
	But SimpliSafe.com slash Crowder.
	10% off.
	This is the last week.
	$15 a month.
	No contract.
	No course.
	Just do it or just, you know, take your chances.
	Who knows who can get into your fortress.
	Join the mud club, don't be a wimp.
	Join the mud club, don't be a bitch.
	Join the mud club, don't be a wimp.
	You better join the mud club unless you want us to kill your children right now.
	How much do you really love your children?
	How much do you really love your children?
	Join the mug club.
	Don't kill your kids.
	Join the mug club.
	We'll kill your kids.
	Join the mug club.
	Don't kill your kids.
	Join the mug club.
	will kill your kids.
	We'll be right back.
	How about this?
	You're watching the old...
	You watch any old movies?
	Mm-mm.
	You're like an old wet tongue now.
	You got Fred Astaire?
	Mm-mm.
	Is this a West Side Story?
	Wonderful time in America.
	Everyone acted like it was so innocent back then.
	It's like, oh, look how innocent movies were.
	Yeah, I see a Puerto Rican shaking her tits right as she goes up and the guy stands.
	It's just...
	It was just veiled.
	You know what a movie you can't make today?
	Musicals?
	Seven Brides for Seven Brothers.
	Yeah, you can't.
	It's basically just kidnap and sexual misconduct.
	All right.
	Producing with me, we have Clint Howard today.
	We have Blair White.
	And we're going to be taking a survey, a quiz, with Blair White from EverydayFeminism.com, an intersectional feminist quiz.
	Huh?
	You don't want to stick around for that.
	Well, Glenn Howard will talk about his dad who recently passed.
	His dad had an unbelievable career in the entertainment industry.
	And I'm sure we'll also hear some...
	Some other crazy things that he'll talk about.
	Producing with me in video studio, as always, is Jared, who is not K. Follow him on Twitter at notkjared.
	Mead us.
	Gratter with your comments, your thoughts, your photoshops.
	I fulfill my legal obligations, mostly.
	Try your conclusions.
	Are we good?
	We're good.
	And sommelier, simplifiedwine.com.
	It means he has more taste buds than the rest of us.
	At G. Morgan Jr.
	How are you, sir?
	I'm doing well.
	How are you?
	I'm doing well.
	What's the wine of the day?
	The wine of the day is Krupp Brothers Damsel Rosé.
	Damsel?
	It's quite the sauce of damn there.
	She's got her leg up and everything.
	Trying to outrun some thoughts there.
	No.
	No.
	This is not compensating.
	Okay.
	Question of the day, we're going to talk about it.
	There wasn't a whole lot.
	By the way, next week, there are no shows for Mug Club members Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, because Thursday is the 16-hour CNN livestream.
	That's 16 hours because it's worse than waterboarding.
	We're going to have guests.
	We're going to have the world premiere of the miniseries of YouTube Carol with some unbelievable cameos in there from 7 a.m.
	to 11 p.m.
	You can't get drunk enough.
	Because we want to earn your dollar.
	Can we drink?
	You don't have to be here for the whole day.
	Actually, no, yes you do.
	And no, you can't.
	So there you go.
	But you have to bring the wine, huh?
	What the?
	What punishment is this?
	What did I do?
	You know, Charlie over there.
	What's her name?
	No, it's the damsel.
	Damsel.
	Yeah, there you go.
	It's like your girlfriend in Canada.
	Question of the day.
	We'll talk about it.
	The only thing in the news, Roy Moore.
	How do you see this?
	I'd like to hear your comments because I've heard a lot of different opinions.
	Do you see it as a short-term loss, Roy Moore losing for a long-term victory?
	It's just a loss is a loss is a loss.
	Do you see it as an individual screw-up?
	Or do you see it kind of, you were saying this before the break, some people see it as a referendum on the Republican Party.
	So I'm interested to hear.
	What do you think about that?
	A lot of different opinions, and we'll get to that.
	But before we do, we have to get to other news of the day.
	Top noon.
	Top noon.
	Really?
	I meant sexual misconduct allegations.
	There's a phrase we find ourselves saying always.
	Oh, gosh.
	NFL legend Warren Sapp defending himself.
	He was proving that he was not a creep by publicly posting pictures of the vibrators they bought for female staff.
	So first, let me set this.
	Why does that say...
	Why would he do that?
	Okay.
	Daily Mail.
	The article, Sapp, considered by many to be one of the all-time great defenders in the league, gave...
	We're talking about a plaintiff.
	Gave the plaintiff sex toys as a Christmas gift for...
	Three years in a row.
	Wow.
	Which would seem bad at first.
	But Sav defended himself pretty valiantly, saying, this was taken out of context.
	What they don't tell you is that on the twelfth day of Christmas, I, your true love, gave to thee a dildo in a pear tree.
	So...
	Oh, gosh.
	It's context is key.
	It's all about that Sav.
	Wait, is that a sign between dildo in a pear tree or...
	A partridge in a dildo tree.
	Partridge in a dildo tree.
	We took a risk.
	I have a question.
	Why three years in a row?
	What kind of usage were these things getting where they were like, oh, you need a new one?
	What's crazy to me is this is the kind of thing where people come forward with these suits and you're going, you got a dildo three years in a row.
	What created an environment where this man was comfortable sending a colleague a dildo three days in a row?
	It's like my mom is obsessed with Snowman.
	You just know, like, you want to get her gifts, get her Snowman.
	At some point, someone told him dildos are their thing.
	That's like my grandmother.
	And they haven't stopped since.
	She always used to buy me Roald Dahl books.
	I don't know why.
	She was like, Stephen's a little reader.
	I'm like, no, I don't.
	I'm not.
	Like, I just, I like Gene Wilder, and now I have a stack, and I don't need them, Grandma.
	Nice.
	But she just pigeonholed you.
	Okay, Connecticut man was sentenced to a year in prison for necrophilia as well after having sex with his dead girlfriend's corpse.
	And here's the thing.
	He did it in an attempt to revive her.
	And this is an actual quote from Fox News.
	What?
	Aaron Gatzer said he thought that sleeping with her body might revive her because his girlfriend hated sleeping with him, according to the arrest warrant.
	So we can add rape to the charges.
	Yes.
	The thing is, this guy was serious in his answer.
	Absolutely serious.
	It would seem absurd, except the rights have already been purchased to this story by AMC for their tentatively titled The F***ing Dead, and they're already taking auditions, we hear.
	Ooh-wee!
	I love myself a good court.
	How about instead of bashing zombies, we start loving zombies?
	And Lucille needs a place to hide.
	That really seems darker than I thought.
	It doesn't have the same mass appeal.
	No.
	You might find that on one of the smaller channels.
	Might be part of a premium package.
	Yeah.
	Robots are now being used to deter homeless people from setting up camp in San Francisco.
	This comes to us from Business Insider.
	The San Francisco Business Times reported last week that the San Francisco SPCA and Animal Advocacy and Pet Adoption Group put a security robot to work outside its facilities, the gentrifying neighborhood.
	I understand where you're coming from.
	And then there are obviously all kinds of protesters.
	They don't think that you should be getting rid of homeless people at all.
	It's a problem in San Francisco, though.
	I will give in their defense...
	Some of the robots in question are overkill.
	Seems like they're going a little bit too much.
	That's a robot on a power trip.
	That is a robot on a power trip.
	You would think if they were trying, they would at least have made the robots not white.
	Yeah.
	And they're paying them.
	I don't know if it makes it any better.
	It's $7 an hour, too, is all they pay for that.
	Yes.
	I'm not kidding.
	That's in the story.
	$7 an hour.
	That's below minimum wage there.
	They do have the black robots that just put them in Oakland.
	And they hold the torch sideways.
	New Jersey suburb finds itself in a heated, there's no good way to get at it, finds itself in a heated standoff over what the locals are now claiming is a hyper-sexualized logo for an ice cream shop.
	You see that there?
	That booty booty.
	I love it, said Al Franken.
	I get it.
	When I first read the story, I thought, oh, that's a human ass on a cow.
	It really seems as though they're pushing it.
	And of course, this is a growing trend, we all know, in the food mascot marketing, as seen recently with the makeover of the Land O'Lakes Butter Indian.
	And then there was, of course, the redo of the Sun-Made Raisin Lady.
	And yeah, that was a little bit.
	And you can see, and then of course it culminated in Tony the cyber sexting tiger.
	And it was unrelated obviously to the hypersexualization, but there are racial tensions in the country and people were obviously upset about Aunt Jeff talking about pancake mix.
	It was ill-received.
	Ill-advised and ill-received.
	We're going to get letters this week.
	Next week is a big, big week.
	16 hour live stream.
	Save it.
	Leave a little in the tank, bro.
	A surgeon has been charged with assault for burning his initials into his patient's livers.
	That's gangster.
	This comes from The Guardian, a renowned liver spleen and pancreas surgeon used an argon beam.
	I'm reading that correctly.
	Used to stop livers bleeding during operations and to highlight, but he would sign his initials into the patient's organs.
	That's awesome.
	Why is that awesome?
	It's hilarious.
	Would you find it so funny?
	What if it were your liver?
	As long as it worked, I'm fine.
	You have very low standards when it comes to surgical procedures.
	When you get put out, all kinds of stuff can happen, buddy.
	I'm just saying.
	That's true.
	I was always paranoid, but I would go under.
	I've been out for some weird surgeries.
	I just assume bad stuff is happening.
	You don't know what you're signing with that waiver.
	You just go home, you cry in the shower, and you're good.
	No, you need to seek counsel.
	That's not a normal part of it.
	Morphine?
	Yes.
	Crying in the shower alone?
	That's not part of the recovery?
	No.
	Because you always send me the pictures when you do.
	Gerald, please find somebody to hold.
	Of course, the surgeon, by the way, is no stranger to controversy, given that four livers just came forward last year, alleging that he forced them to watch him masturbate in the surgery prep room.
	So it seems as though this is...
	Yeah.
	Well, to go back to the question today, we'll talk about...
	Up next, Blair White.
	We'll take the quiz.
	Yes.
	The show can only get better.
	The show can only get better.
	Roy Moore.
	So, Roy Moore.
	One thing that's...
	Obviously, he lost.
	Yes.
	And I mentioned people's opinions on it, but there have been a lot of, before we get to the opinions, there were a lot of memes going around.
	Nakajara was the one who showed this to me.
	Funny, the memes, we couldn't find the source, and we found out, I think it was CNN, but memes declared that black women made more loose.
	This is something you see everywhere right now.
	And I, immediately when I watched it, I go, well, of course that's untrue.
	And it's one of those things we weren't going to talk about until we realized that most people, if you're not paying attention, they don't know that, of course, that's untrue.
	Black turnout was up about 10%.
	5% less voted for more than for Trump.
	It wouldn't have even been close to change the election.
	By the way, black voter turnout is not very good.
	No.
	It really is.
	But that's Brooklyn's fault because we don't want them there, right?
	Well, I was surprised.
	I think it was like 96%.
	What was it?
	He got 6% of black men, which surprised me.
	That's high.
	That's actually pretty high for Republicans.
	I think Donald Trump was really high with something like 9% of black men.
	I don't have the numbers in front of me.
	But the voters who turned the election, just to correct the misinformation, they were Trump supporters who didn't vote for more.
	Whether you like Trump or not, it's people who voted for Donald Trump and didn't vote for more.
	Almost half of the people who voted for President Trump stayed home.
	Wow.
	Turnout was down 45%.
	Wow.
	45% from the presidential election.
	There's a 9% drop in support from Trump to more.
	Okay?
	Tells you something, right?
	Well, it tells you there's a limit to tribalism.
	Yeah.
	It tells you that Republicans don't just vote for whoever has an R next to their name.
	And people say that both sides do it.
	I think both sides have done it.
	I think before President Donald Trump, you know, this goes to kind of what I've talked about.
	It's a much wider tent with Republicans.
	You have libertarians.
	You have conservatives.
	You kind of have now the Trump populists.
	They're okay disagreeing with Democrats.
	There's a D next to the name.
	They're going to vote for it.
	I think it's an age thing, too.
	I think it's an age thing for Republicans, typically the ones that are on the ticket no matter what, always, ever.
	Typically older people for Republicans.
	I think it's typically younger people you find more and more for Democrats, seeing as all the people who are Bernie, Bernie, Bernie only, hate Hillary, but still pull the love of her.
	Yeah, absolutely.
	Well, and you and I had this conversation in the 2016 election, like, oh man, we're in a really tough spot.
	The guy with an R next to his name isn't exactly the best person for the job, we don't think, necessarily.
	Yeah, exactly.
	He's not an R, first off, right?
	So I don't think the Dems have those conversations nearly as often.
	Like, oh, they're not really a good Democrat.
	No, they really don't.
	They're just going to vote D and go.
	It really is.
	That is one thing.
	They get behind their candidate, and people would try and say, well, you have to do that, whether it was Trump, whoever it was.
	You have to get behind the candidate no matter what.
	Well, it's mental gymnastics after that just to try to say, oh, I'm still with this person because they don't even believe what they say they believe.
	Well, that's because one, people say, well, you're a political ideologue.
	People always say that to me.
	It's like, really?
	This kind of shows that conservatives are more principled, for sure.
	Their prism, their worldview, it determines their values, but it's not based on an R. And ironically, people who label themselves Republicans are more likely to proudly say, I'm a conservative, I'm a Republican.
	I see other guys going, I don't believe in labels, man.
	Where's the D? Okay.
	The D? She killed a guy, right?
	Yeah?
	That's okay.
	He was shooping kids in the basement?
	Well, that's okay.
	How many D-picks did he say?
	What do you think?
	Do you think it's a referendum on the Republican Party or do you think it's just run more?
	No.
	Honestly, I think it's the sexual assault stuff that's coming out right now.
	We talked about this a little bit.
	I think right now you can, and you and I probably disagree a little, but you can throw that out and it's going to sabotage anybody right now.
	Anybody is willing to believe it because so many examples have come out where like, oh yeah, no, this really is going on.
	So even if there's no evidence, in his case, I think there was a lot of evidence.
	But I think any other year, it would have been a little different story.
	I don't think that's right, but I think it would have been.
	So I don't think it's a Republican thing.
	I think you're kind of right, maybe in terms of a temporary bubble.
	But I think long-term right now, people are going, all right, sexual assault.
	Because everything is sexual assault.
	I think right now, it's the optics war.
	So everyone is trying to avoid the optics.
	That's why I'll frank us up now.
	That's why, what's the other guys that just stepped down from Arizona?
	Cornyn.
	Cornyn.
	Something like that.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	I think I'm missing that one out.
	It's an optics war.
	He was corning someone.
	It is, and that's the problem.
	There's legitimate stuff that we have to fight against in sexual assault, but right now, my fear is that there's no due process for anybody.
	You throw it out there right now, and people are willing to believe it.
	You and I are getting to the point where we're like, show me proof.
	And I'll believe it.
	That's why it's so funny to me that they're like, well, clearly, VP Mike Pence must be a creep.
	Yeah, exactly.
	He just understands.
	He doesn't even want this.
	He doesn't even want there to be a chance of this.
	Okay, so what do you think?
	Do you see this as a short-term loss that was necessary?
	Do you think that if Roy Moore won, it would have been...
	You talk about the optics.
	It would have been worse for the Republican Party long-term?
	Long-term, absolutely.
	You do?
	Yeah.
	Because you were the earliest people like, ah, I think we still want him to win.
	Absolutely.
	I find myself going back and forth, but I do think long-term, you've got to fight the long-term war of these things.
	And I think with Trump, if it weren't for the Supreme Court, I think it absolutely would have been worth the long-term war to let someone else take it for a little bit.
	Looking back, kind of the Ben Shapiro position.
	I think Trump has definitely caused irreparable damage to the Republican Party.
	Of course.
	And the Supreme Court was really, really important.
	And most of it's optics.
	It's the branding.
	He's rebranded in a way that it should never have been branded.
	And he really hasn't done much.
	It doesn't really represent the people who he's branding.
	Right.
	He's kind of a scumbag.
	All right.
	Go ahead.
	Look, I can have an opinion.
	I mean, I'd rather have him in office.
	But at the same time, he's kind of a jerk.
	So what do you want to do?
	I think it definitely is better because Democrats don't really have a leg to stand on right now politically.
	There's nothing that they're coming out with that's really motivating anybody.
	And so if they could have attacked Roy Moore with the sexual assault stuff and really painted him with that...
	Yeah, they would have used it.
	Now, just think about using the Access Hollywood tape.
	Yeah.
	Right?
	Imagine if Moore came out with Roy Moore that was really legitimate.
	Yeah.
	And then they'd be like, see, that's the kind of guy they want in office.
	They're already doing it with Trump, so if they had another person to point to, it just makes it worse.
	Well, Al Franken did it with his resignation.
	But I do think, listen, this is interesting.
	To me, there is a silver lining here.
	I'm going, hey, you know what?
	Regardless of, and I do think, listen, the media is going, it's going to be a hatchet job on Roy Moore far more than Al Franken, right?
	It's going to be a hatchet job on Roy Moore far more than the Clintons.
	Bill Clinton, we do know that he had extramarital affairs.
	We do know that he had extramarital affairs with people who weren't even necessarily willing.
	We do know that he lied about it in court.
	The Democrats didn't even care anyway.
	It became trendy in 2017.
	Yeah, it became trendy in 2017.
	You realize, oh yeah, Bill Clinton's a sexual predator.
	What?
	What?
	Are you serious?
	This is breaking news, CNN? Yeah, it's a slick wheelie for a reason.
	Come on.
	Here's the thing.
	With Democrats, not only is it swept under the rug, they become fixtures.
	Ted Kennedy.
	Now, Ted Kennedy, he had about a 40-year career after he was soliciting 16-year-old girls.
	Wow.
	After he had an affair with Mary Jo Kopechny and left her in the river for dead, he served for 40 more years after that.
	So Roy Moore, we didn't even have the evidence.
	There hadn't even been a trial yet.
	These were just allegations.
	Now, it seems like there might have been some weight to it.
	And that was enough for 40% of Republicans who voted for Donald Trump to abandon the guy.
	Ted Kennedy killed abroad and solicited teenagers!
	He was the only one who Marilyn Monroe wasn't willing to blow!
	Ha ha!
	And he was there for 40 years.
	I think that's a good thing.
	I think it's a good thing that at least there are some standards, regardless of the Roy Moore situation, long term.
	We have to go.
	We have to come back and take this test with Blair White after the break.
	Damn.
	Then Clint Howard.
	Damn it.
	Damn.
	Damn.
	I'm with you.
	I'm with you.
	And all our love.
	Dum-di-dum-ping.
	Dum-dum-dum. Dum-di-dum-ping.
	Dum-dum-dum.
	I'm with you.
	I'm with you.
	Bang, kids are dead.
	See what you did.
	You failed to join.
	We killed your kids.
	You failed to join the mug club.
	So we killed all your little children.
	You see, now you don't have any children.
	Now you don't have any children.
	We killed your kids.
	We said we would.
	You didn't heed.
	We kept our words.
	You made us do it.
	We killed your kids.
	You killed your kids.
	Technically.
	Allah is the Greatest.
	The assistant there said he enjoyed doing the show, so he's been coming back.
	He's been on a lot.
	He always seems like he's one show of ours away from losing his career, so I think he gets the show.
	It tells me he knows.
	Yes.
	What's going on guys?
	Why with the music?
	I was watching Homeland.
	Louder with Crowder Studios is protected exclusively by Walther and Hopper.
	You ever watch old Jack Dempsey when you do this and then, boom, throw the punch?
	I don't know how, but this would actually fool people.
	Ah!
	They'll be like, what?
	What is he doing with those?
	Is it ours?
	Is it a lever?
	No one knows.
	I have no idea.
	Am I still in a boxing match?
	And I lost!
	Alright, next guest.
	We've had this wonderful guest on several times.
	You can follow her on the YouTubes at...
	Well, not at.
	That's on the Twitter.
	YouTube.com slash Blair White X. There you go.
	X. The X is important.
	Generation X. I expect Triple H to come out here any second.
	How are you, Blair?
	I am amazing.
	Thanks for having me again.
	Well, we're glad to have you on.
	So we let you know beforehand, so no one can say we sandbagged you.
	None of us want to do this, and we knew that you wouldn't want to do this.
	So we thought, let's all be unhappy together.
	Thanks for dragging me into this.
	Clint Howard after the break, by the way.
	This comes from EverydayFeminism.com, and it's a quiz.
	We're all going to take 10 things every intersectional feminist should ask on a first date.
	Now, Blair, before you roll your eyes, and I'm sure you already are.
	Yeah.
	Can you explain for people who don't know the term intersectional feminist?
	Okay, so intersectionality is basically it's what feminists believe that like women in general and people experience oppression in like varying degrees.
	So it's basically like White people aren't good enough, the belief system.
	It's basically like, it's not enough to be a feminist and advocate for women.
	You have to focus on, you know, black issues and how they trump women's issues.
	And then it goes into, like, disabled people.
	And then it goes into, like, I don't know, Down syndrome babies.
	You swear you haven't read this quiz yet?
	Yeah, I haven't read it yet.
	Because you just hit the quiz.
	You just hit all the bases.
	I mean, listen, it's everyday feminism.
	It's predictable as hell.
	Well, see, it's not for people out there.
	You need to understand this.
	We live in this world where we understand it.
	A lot of people go, what's intersectional feminism?
	I mean, they wear it as a badge of honor.
	I had no idea what it meant.
	Until just now?
	Until just now.
	And you just learned it from transgender on Skype.
	I could guess.
	That's the wonder of new media, sir.
	I could guess, but I wouldn't have been right.
	I don't know.
	Okay, this is from Blair.
	You may open it, so we can all go through this in real time.
	Everydayfeminism.com.
	I have a hard copy here, because we're going to take notes.
	We're ready.
	People on the Twitter, you can tweet all of us and let us know.
	You're going along with the quiz.
	At Naki Jared, at S. Crowder, at G. Morgan Jr., and at Blair White.
	Miss Blair White.
	Yeah, M.S. Blair White on Twitter.
	M.S. Blair White.
	Okay.
	Oh, God.
	Okay, the number one question.
	The top ten questions that every intersectional feminist should ask on a first date.
	Let me preface this, okay?
	It's a date, right?
	So you would think these questions should center...
	First date, by the way.
	First date.
	First date.
	So you would think that the questions would center around something relational.
	Or like a Lord of the Rings guy, or like a Harry Potter girl.
	Right.
	You have a penis?
	I don't know.
	It's a guessing game.
	This is the whole thing when it's everyday feminism.
	You don't know.
	The ladies look like men, and...
	It's like a roll of the dice.
	It's like a roll of the Scattergories dice.
	All those...
	It's a role against the cards against humanity.
	Yeah, exactly.
	Number one question on a first date.
	Do you believe that black lives matter?
	Oh my god.
	Is this a trick question?
	No, this is what they're at.
	Yes, wonderful.
	Let's start here.
	There are three categories that are non-negotiables.
	Understanding race, class, and gender.
	Okay, number one question.
	I guess we have to answer this.
	I didn't plan this far ahead.
	Do you believe that black lives matter?
	So Blair, you get this on a first date with an intersectional feminist.
	How do you answer?
	Oh, that's not a loaded question at all.
	Obviously not.
	But you know they're never actually asking you, do you think Black Lives Matter?
	They're asking you what you think of the movement.
	Yeah, it's capitalized.
	Black Lives Matter.
	I haven't even heard from them, the movement, for a while.
	Yeah.
	Are they wise still?
	I don't know.
	I don't know.
	I think DeRay's doing a guy in the back of a cargo van.
	That's not comfortable.
	Okay, I would just answer, because right away I want the date to get over with.
	I'm cheating right now.
	It's kind of like when I get really bored at poker.
	Not good, Jerry knows this.
	I just put down all my chips in a bad hand.
	I'm like, I'm out!
	I would just say, I believe all lives matter.
	Thank you, you get the check.
	Yeah, I think I would actually say no and then go with the I think all lives matter, just to push it one step further.
	No, I don't, actually.
	I think all lives matter.
	Okay, Jared?
	I'm going to say, what shade of black are we talking about?
	Because...
	Is this a mob?
	They're all shades.
	It's technically not a color.
	Hollister?
	Black?
	I can go with that.
	It's one of the benefits of being partially colorblind.
	Alright, so pretty much all of us are going to hell according to the first...
	So there, let me just write that little note there.
	Okay, number two.
	On a first date.
	This is, of course, Blair is our guest.
	Blair gets the answer first.
	What are your thoughts on gender and sexual orientation?
	Let me preface this that says the gender binary is a tiny box and I wish it didn't exist.
	I wouldn't want to be with anyone who is queer phobic.
	One of the many important elements in dismantling patriarchy is to abolish gender roles.
	Okay, anyway, so this is all interesting.
	But what are your thoughts on gender and sexual orientation on a first date?
	First off, would you ask this on a first date?
	No, this sounds like the worst date ever.
	It says ignoring trans massagé noir.
	What is massagé noir?
	Wait, where does it say this?
	Down towards the end.
	Yeah, it says...
	Well, I know what misogyny is.
	Are they trying to say...
	It's a new Tim Burton genre.
	Does it mean like misogyny against black trans?
	I don't know.
	Maybe, yeah, because noir.
	You don't know this?
	You don't know this, Blair?
	No.
	I've seen it before, but I never know what it is.
	Blair, what chance does a straight cis male have to know?
	None.
	You're a consultant.
	There is no chance.
	There is no chance.
	Okay.
	All right.
	I think that's the whole point of this.
	Yeah.
	It's not a question we'd ask.
	Okay.
	That's number two.
	So number three, first date.
	How do you work to dismantle sexism and misogyny in your life, Blair?
	I don't know.
	I decide every time, every restaurant with my boyfriend, I guess.
	That always seems to be my thing.
	There you go.
	Okay.
	I don't...
	This is like the worst.
	It is.
	That's the whole purpose of it.
	Okay.
	It's crucial for cishet men to learn to de-center their male privilege.
	De-center.
	Yeah.
	De-center.
	Okay, Gerald.
	Let's say you get asked this.
	How do you dismantle sexism and misogyny in your life?
	I don't dismantle anything.
	But if somebody's being sexist, I call them out on it.
	If they're being misogynistic, I call them out on it.
	I'm a man.
	This is what we do.
	And you think that's all you have to do.
	Yes.
	That's an example of misogyny.
	Internalized misogyny.
	That you don't think you're required to do more.
	Jared?
	Calling somebody out's enough!
	I don't work at all.
	I've already hired a female assistant to bring me lunch.
	Okay.
	Sandwiches.
	All right.
	Only.
	Number four.
	First date again.
	What are your thoughts on sex work?
	Yes, please.
	Oh.
	My thoughts is it's probably cool to not be a hooker and not get cookies.
	That's probably cooler.
	Direct quote.
	Cool to not be a hooker.
	Hooker.
	Two O's.
	Yeah.
	Got it.
	Okay, let me see what it is.
	They say you may scratch your head at this one, but much like racism and misogynoir.
	Can someone bring up misogynoir?
	I'm on it.
	Google it.
	I'm on it right now.
	Being pro-sex worker is a necessary pillar of dismantling the patriarchy.
	Okay, here's something I don't understand.
	Okay.
	Being pro-sex worker, it's the oldest profession in existence because of patriarchy.
	Yes.
	I mean, how is this pulling one over?
	Like, oh, wait, what?
	You support sex workers?
	Oh, no!
	How do they think this works?
	According to Wikipedia, so this is authoritative, misogynoir is misogyny directed towards black women where race and gender both play roles in bias.
	It was coined by queer black feminists.
	Moya Bailey, who created a term to address misogyny, directed toward black women in America, visual, popular culture, blah, blah, blah.
	You know what, Blair, you were right to ask, because it's in the question, what are your thoughts on gender and sexual, it has nothing to do with race.
	So this writer just threw it in, he'd be like, look at the word I know, misogynoir.
	That's the intersectional thing, though.
	They always have to bring up black people as well.
	It can't ever just be about gender.
	Yeah.
	Can't it just be misogynistic in general?
	Like, why does it have to be specific to a race?
	Isn't that racist?
	Yeah.
	What is it?
	We passed the mic.
	I'm sorry, people.
	This is really...
	We're all reading this for the first time.
	It says, I mean, the kind of pro-hoaxism where you understand the labor of sex workers of color, especially trans women of color who engage in sex workers of color.
	I can't.
	Also, it's like, there are social stigmas for good reasons sometimes.
	Like, being a hooker is dangerous.
	I don't know.
	That's the part I've never understood about feminists.
	Like, they should probably, you know, not advocate for that.
	Well, this is like, it seems like this question is written around the character Angel from Rent.
	It's a sex worker, a trans black sex worker.
	Yeah.
	That's so bleak.
	I mean...
	There's gotta be like four.
	It's like, your chances of contracting AIDS are significantly higher.
	But what about the sickle sale?
	Yeah, that's there too.
	Gosh!
	What are my thoughts on sex work?
	I don't know how to...
	Yeah, what are your thoughts on sex work?
	I just enjoy when my sex works.
	Okay.
	Question number five.
	Dad joke.
	I don't even know...
	Question number five.
	Are you a supporter of the BDS movement?
	Do you...
	No, don't follow...
	Did you know what this meant right away?
	Ooh.
	I have boycott, what is it?
	Boycott, divest, sanctions.
	Oh my gosh.
	In an effort to end international support for Israel's oppression of Palestinians.
	So, this is question number five on the first day.
	By the way, at no point, even for someone obnoxious, has been like, are you gluten-free?
	Yeah.
	I would take that.
	Right?
	Yeah.
	I mean, I'd still feed them gluten.
	This is the biggest day ever.
	This is just, I mean, how does this, Blair, Blair, these are the people who claim to be your peeps.
	They claim they're intersectional for you.
	These are not my people, honey, at all.
	At all.
	Well, okay, BDS. Here's what I say for BDS. No.
	No.
	I think when one side has eradicate all Jews in their official charter, they're the bad guys.
	The other guys get what they want.
	That's it.
	I support the guys who don't have eradicate all Jews.
	Don't push me into the sea.
	There you go.
	Call me reductive.
	That's right.
	I thought I said BDSM at first.
	Which would actually be more appropriate in a first date.
	At least then it's like about you and what you're into.
	Exactly.
	Like, are you into BDSM? It's Dick Morris, you know, the foot fetish, Al Gore.
	Okay, what are you into?
	But BDS, you actually might be more likely to get the wrong answer than someone who thought you said BDSM. That's true.
	Right.
	That's true.
	Someone like, how do you feel about, they're basically saying, how do you feel about Israeli occupation?
	And the other person's like, Vietnamese sex hammock, stirrups, you know?
	Yeah.
	You seem well versed in this, Steven.
	Continue.
	I've listened to Rihanna.
	Oh, there you go.
	Okay, number six.
	Let's go as though these are interesting questions.
	Number six.
	This is where it really got, I swear to you.
	What is your understanding of settler colonialism and indigenous rights?
	Blair, this is an issue close to your heart as a translator.
	This is something I constantly ponder, yes.
	No, I'd be running.
	I'd be absolutely running.
	What does this say?
	It's committed genocide?
	How Europeans committed genocide?
	Okay, this is what this is about.
	How better to understand how settler colonial...
	Well, you know what also?
	Europeans, they want to talk genocide.
	Committed some...
	Yeah.
	But you know what else Europeans kind of paved the way for?
	The ability to write stupid tests on blogs like Everyday Feminism.
	I thought Everyday Feminism didn't...
	Weren't they supposed to disappear a year ago?
	Like they lost all their money or something?
	How are they still here?
	Like Gawker?
	I don't know.
	I thought they were shutting down.
	I think that about the Young Turks and then all of a sudden some terrorist organization swoops in and gives them another 20 mil.
	Al Jazeera, next thing that's coming from Qatar, Clock Boy's parents fell into some money.
	Here, Jake!
	Here you go!
	Trying to be reasonable!
	Here's one thing.
	If I'm answering honestly, we've talked about this.
	Listen, obviously some atrocities committed on both sides, but here's the deal.
	When you're talking about settlers, about the United States more particularly, if no one ever came here, right, and they still had not domesticated horses, they didn't use the wheel.
	I don't know if you know this, Blair.
	This idea of the horseback, they didn't use the wheel when we came here.
	This was the new world.
	Give them Give him time.
	Romans did.
	Give him time.
	Yeah, give him time.
	They'd get there.
	No contact, and a plane goes over now.
	Guess what?
	Someone's getting genocided.
	Yeah, they did.
	Okay, number seven.
	Capitalism.
	Do you think capitalism is exploitative?
	This is a question number seven on a first date.
	Who, at this point in the date, if you're still here at number seven, do you plow through just for the fun of it?
	How hot is this person?
	I mean, by the time you get to seven, like, you gotta be like a ten.
	A straight up ten for me to still be at the table.
	Yeah, you couldn't be hot enough, really.
	You're right, I know.
	I've already committed date rape just on principle at this point.
	What?
	You're an awful person.
	It's a joke, everybody!
	Do you think capitalism is exploitative?
	That depends.
	Does it apply to question number four with the sex workers?
	Right, yeah.
	I don't know.
	Is that a story?
	I didn't put these two together.
	Yeah, take back question number four.
	You know, here's one thing.
	Regardless of your view, and I'm kind of a libertarian on that, but it does destroy lives, it basically, when you're saying, let's tax it and regulate sex work, you've effectively made us the pimp.
	Yeah.
	The taxpayer is now the pimp.
	That's true.
	That's all it is.
	Yeah, but in that case, they'd be safe.
	Well, yeah, because the taxpayer, we're the pimp.
	We're slapping bitches.
	With a Texas.
	He knows.
	Alright, do you think capitalism is exploitative?
	I mean, at this point I'd be like, I guess bartender!
	Yeah.
	Another bottle of wine, please!
	Okay, number eight.
	This is okay, Blair.
	Can any human be illegal?
	Lord.
	You can be an illegal immigrant.
	That's the point.
	They're always so hyperbolic, like you're an illegal human.
	No, just you being here is illegal.
	Right.
	Kind of like you're not an illegal person, but your knife in the person's spleen is an illegal act.
	Let's hear.
	It's mind-boggling that borders are even a thing.
	Totally.
	So to call people aliens or illegal immigrants is just so inhumane and despicable.
	Let's send you to the third world and see if you give a damn about any of these questions.
	Just send me to try to survive.
	I don't care about borders.
	What was that, Blair?
	If that's what boggles your mind, the existence of borders.
	You're a little simple.
	I mean, I just, I mean, I don't, here's the thing.
	I understand there's some things where they might say, hey, it boggles the mind.
	Like, right now, net neutrality.
	I'm against the whole idea of net neutrality or the 2015 rules from Barack Obama.
	I think most people don't understand them.
	But I don't say it boggles the mind that anyone would support them.
	But when someone just says, oh, it boggles the mind that you think your country should be a country.
	I love this.
	White Americans stole this land, colonized the land, created so many borders, pushed out killing enslaved people of color, and somehow they have their deaths.
	At what point does intersectionality include the Africans who came over here and apparently built the country by themselves?
	Yeah.
	What point are they responsible?
	This is intersectionality, right?
	Oh my gosh.
	At some point, they are the culprits, too.
	Wait, the Africans who sold them, you mean?
	No, the ones who came over here.
	Intersectionality.
	They helped.
	They built America.
	So at what point are not just white Americans...
	They built a system.
	That's a good point.
	But then also, what about the African slave traders who sold them?
	Yeah, even more responsibility.
	How far does this go back?
	I don't know.
	And then at the end of the paragraph, it says, miss me with that bulls**t.
	That's what I'm saying to this quiz.
	This is the beauty of this intersectional LGBTQAIP, put it all under one umbrella, because they just act as though if you have to ask, you couldn't possibly understand.
	You know they added a two?
	For two-spirit, right?
	They added the number two.
	It's a meme at this point.
	It's a cat walking across the street.
	Okay.
	All right.
	Question number nine.
	Do you support Muslim Americans and non-Muslim people from Islamic countries?
	What does that mean?
	Do you support...
	That's so broad.
	Oh, let's read.
	Straight from the lips of the broad.
	In what way?
	I'm sorry, I just read the second paragraph.
	I can't think of any religion, any other religion, which has been vilified to lie about more than Islam in a cultural and systemic way.
	I am not a Muslim, so I will stay in my lane.
	But I cannot, yeah, I'm staying in my lane.
	But I cannot imagine for a second.
	You'd be claiming to be a feminist if I didn't stand in solidarity with my Muslim friends and family, especially now, especially after 9-11.
	Hold on, I love this.
	Don't waste your time and energy on dating someone who thinks that Islam is inherently violent or misogynistic.
	It's because I read the book and I followed what Muhammad said.
	Screw me for reading.
	What if I just showed up?
	What if a woman just showed up?
	Let's say this is a man asking these questions.
	What if a woman showed up to the date and, I don't know, just had like a pair of pliers on her neck, like Hellraiser.
	So many were like, well, why do you have pliers?
	Well, my dad makes me wear these.
	You'd be like, that's unbelievable.
	We'll just change it with our dad.
	Is your dad jigsaw?
	Yeah, my dad's pinhead.
	No.
	The irony is this person is so intersectional, but they actually don't support LGBT people in Muslim countries because they're sitting here denying that Islam is violent.
	That's actually great.
	Blair, let me ask you this.
	How do you think you would fare in the great state of Palestine?
	There is no state of Palestine, by the way.
	I don't know, honey.
	I don't think I could be doing YouTube, that's for sure.
	No, I mean...
	I think you'd get one YouTube video.
	For no other reason, it would be an aerial shot of you.
	Yeah, unfortunately.
	Just because of the Wi-Fi.
	They'd just be throwing you.
	Okay, final question.
	This is why I said I asked if you'd read the quiz.
	Number 10.
	Does your allyship, there's that word, include disabled folks?
	All right, Blair.
	Let's see how tolerant you are.
	Allyship of what, though?
	This is all so, like, broad.
	Allyship of what?
	Like, yes, I support disabled people.
	I'm not an equal person.
	Here's how it starts off.
	As an able-bodied woman, again, I will stay in my lane, but...
	Then do it.
	She hasn't stayed in her lane at all.
	Blinkers on!
	This hoe is like swerving everywhere.
	She's in the H-O-V lane.
	She's like a person who puts the dummy head in the seat so she can go in the H-O-V lane.
	No, no, no, I'm carpooling!
	Oh no!
	My doll's a negro!
	No, no it's not.
	Can't say that.
	So you're saying blackface doll?
	Pretty much is what I was saying.
	You know, I don't know, it says be mindful of those who mock disabled people, that kind of cruelty is inexcusable.
	I'm even going to go the other way.
	Sometimes it's excusable.
	Sometimes it's funny.
	Sometimes it's funny!
	It can be funny.
	You ever seen a kid with rickets, like, back in the days?
	You're like, that's just, he moves like a Muppet.
	A little humorous.
	You can benefit from a little capitalism, too.
	A little capitalism.
	That'll help him.
	Capitalism.
	Be good for him.
	Eradicated.
	Someone looking to exploit the rickets loophole where they can make a little bit of cash.
	I prefer the word profit.
	Yeah, but I know this guy who has, like, a messed up leg, and he waddles like a penguin.
	I always tell him, because it's funny.
	Does he laugh?
	Sometimes.
	Does he laugh like this?
	Ah!
	Oh, okay.
	All right.
	Okay, so final question, Blair.
	We do have to go, and I know you're going to be, well, I can't say, but we have this big 16-hour livestream next week, and Blair may or may not be there.
	Wink, wink.
	What do you, these people, they're just intersectionality.
	Obviously, it's really stemmed from the transgender thing.
	That's where they've, like, they've latched on to it.
	How frustrating is it for you to always have to say, yes, I'm trans, but, because I would assume you run into people who think you would agree with this all the time.
	Do you stay in the lane, Blair?
	It is frustrating.
	I can't drive, okay?
	I'm I'm definitely not in one lane.
	But it is frustrating because it's like half of my existence on YouTube is like doing damage control.
	It's like correcting people who are speaking for me who I never asked to speak for me.
	So it's really frustrating.
	Yeah, I can imagine.
	All right.
	Well, thank you, Blair, for being a good sport.
	This is at everydayfeminism.com.
	You know what?
	Don't go there.
	Don't give them your traffic.
	But you can go to youtube.com slash BlairWhiteX or at MissBlairWhite.
	I thought, I was hoping you'd be more outlandish in your answers, like, I don't know, cis male scum die, but...
	Apparently you've been...
	You pissed the wrong training for that.
	I'm sorry.
	Alright, thank you so much.
	We have to go.
	Clint Howard is banging on the door and he's out of his mind.
	We have to go see him next.
	We'll see you soon.
	Bye guys Hey guys, Merry Christmas And I wanted to address the elephant in the room this year.
	There's a lot of people that eat way too much soy.
	They put soy in everything.
	But...
	I don't want them to not have a Christmas or a Christmas song.
	So, I did a remake of an old classic just for them.
	It's called The Twelve Triggers of Christmas.
	And I'll do a shorter version.
	This can be a little long.
	On the first day of Christmas Something triggered me A straight couple with a family On the twelfth day of Christmas, something triggered me.
	Twelve Christians praying, eleven good cops copping, ten trumps a-tweeting, nine men succeeding, eight comics joking, seven armed civilians, six Russians hacking, five whites with no guilt.
	Four soy-less lattes, three full-time moms, two total genders, and a straight couple with a family.
	Merry Christmas, everyone.
	even the soy boys you're better at personal Oh, there you go.
	You're better in person?
	Yeah!
	I did this.
	This was a little for you.
	This was for you more than the audience.
	That's kind of a nipples move?
	That's a nipples move.
	Little Nicky.
	I grew up with that little Nicky.
	You know, not very well reviewed, but was very popular when I was in junior high.
	Clint Howard, for those who don't know, here live in studio.
	He's got nothing to plug.
	I don't think you have anything.
	I mean, you're Clint Howard.
	What do we plug?
	It's just like one of the longest catalogs in all of IMDb history.
	You know, I haven't started becoming some sort of...
	I'm a salesman, or I don't sell insurance, or I don't really have a website.
	I do make snow globes, but they're hideously expensive.
	So I wouldn't try to sell them to anybody because I charge $228,000.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	Okay, it sounds like you're putting me on here.
	You really sold any for that?
	No, but if I just sell one...
	If I just sell one, everything will be cool.
	And you see, they can't really fly.
	And you have them on your shirt, correct?
	Oh, yeah.
	I got snow globes here.
	You made those snow globes?
	Yes, I make snow globes.
	And let's see, what is that?
	That's a snow globe inside of a snow globe.
	And that's a clown.
	And his name is Crappy with a K. Okay.
	And he's going to the bathroom.
	There's a commode.
	And that's a guy in an ivory tower, Cecil.
	Okay.
	Now, do I have to ask, or let's just, what's the story behind the snow globes?
	You know, I've always been kind of interested in keeping my hands busy and just being creative.
	And I used to sort of paint and do multimedia stuff two-dimensionally, and it just came up something to do.
	You know, I've had artificial hips, and I used to play a lot of golf.
	And without playing golf, I kind of needed something to do.
	So this was basically a garage project.
	How many snow gloves do you have now?
	Do you think you've made?
	Oh, I've probably made 20-something.
	I haven't made one in a while, but I've given a few away.
	One, rest in peace.
	Broke?
	No, well, what happened is they become unglued.
	They were the Pittsburgh Steelers.
	They were celebrating their championship, and they just came unglued from the base.
	So floating Steelers...
	The ball did or the Steelers came unglued?
	The Steelers inside of the snow globe were floating.
	They came unglued.
	And then at that point, you know, you can't have floating, unglued Steelers.
	So they look more like the Browns at that point.
	Yes.
	Yes.
	Speaking of that, you know, you got to be a little careful about as you apply stuff, otherwise you don't want any floaties in your snow globes.
	Well, then that's crappy commode gone wrong.
	Yeah, crappy commode, you could get floaties.
	That was a question.
	Do you want floaties or not?
	Now, one more thing.
	I have a whirling dervish gathers no blood clots, snow globe, and it is a whirling dervish with one hand lopped off.
	And it was an accident.
	It was a dusting accident.
	I had the whirling dervish.
	He used to have two hands.
	Okay.
	But the hand got knocked off.
	I've done horror movies.
	I bloodied it.
	I put it in a snow globe.
	And he's like spinning around, bleeding to death because a whirling dervish gathers no blood clots.
	We're not going to see that in a Christmas tree store anytime soon, I don't think.
	No, but it's a prized possession of mine.
	I can imagine.
	Yeah.
	If we had $208,000, we'd ask you to make one for the Lotto with Crowder.
	I drive it to you.
	That's one reason why it's so expensive.
	Because I can't fly it, I physically would drive it to you.
	So it's free vacations at that point.
	Basically, we're paying for vacation time.
	I would Uber.
	If you bought a snow globe, I would kiss your...
	We don't have that kind of cash, disposable cash, but that is fascinating.
	Sell some more of these.
	Yeah, sell some more of the Mutt Club's.
	And all of a sudden, Hand Ed just doesn't seem that impressive.
	And we'll close with the plug for Mutt Club.
	Wow, you've done so much.
	I mean, I know...
	You tell us what you wanted to talk about here today, but I know, obviously, your dad recently passed.
	Yeah, Rance Howard.
	Rance Howard.
	You know, I got to work with him, actually.
	I might have something to plug, because I did a movie with him a couple of months ago.
	I guess it's now been...
	It's called Appleseed.
	It's a movie about a guy who spends 50 years in prison and he gets out of prison and he goes on this kind of odyssey and he helps everybody that he sort of comes in contact with.
	His journey is to his son's house.
	And I play the son, and I'm like the only guy in the story that just isn't bowled over by this man because my memories of him are distorted because of the spit-stained, scratched-up plexiglass that I had to, you know, grow up.
	And you worked on this with Rance Howard, with your dad.
	What did he do on that?
	He was number one on the call sheet.
	Wow.
	Yeah, no.
	Dad worked a lot.
	He was in a movie called Broken Memories towards the end.
	He played an Alzheimer's patient.
	He was in this Appleseed, and I got to work with him.
	And Robbie Benson is in the movie.
	Adrian Barbeau, I believe, is in the movie.
	Tell the story that's fascinating.
	Your dad, Rance Howard, goes from Oklahoma.
	Right out there in the ranches of Oklahoma.
	How does that come about?
	Because that paved the way for you and your brother.
	Yes.
	Both Ron and I have certainly talked about it in terms of, I don't think we have the intestinal fortitude to do what he did or to break the chains and go from, you know, to make a move from Oklahoma, you know.
	To Hollywood, let alone, I mean, Ron being able to be a storyteller and a producer of major things and people pay attention and just even entertaining.
	Yeah.
	No, dad's fortitude, I mean, he was a hick.
	Yeah.
	My dad grew up on a farm and he got the bug of acting when he was like in the sixth grade.
	And, you know, in his high school, his counselor had no idea what Broadway was.
	Right.
	No idea.
	He suggested the University of Oklahoma because they had a drama department.
	And Dad went to the drama department and realized they were teaching theory.
	They weren't teaching any practical how to make a living in show business.
	Right.
	So Dad, just as a 20-year-old, he went out from Oklahoma to New York, got a job as an usher in a movie theater, and he did have a break.
	I mean, some people don't get breaks.
	He got a job in the Broadway play Mr.
	Roberts.
	Well, some people don't get breaks, but obviously you said that fortitude and that kind of a work ethic, it lends itself to being the kind of guy who's there when the break can occur.
	Well, you know, also, too, you know, listen, doing an autopsy of his life, I mean, he turned out to be a really, really good dude.
	Right.
	And he was selfless and...
	You know, I mean, what he did for Ron and I to put our careers, and he didn't even really think of what we were doing as a career.
	It was just an opportunity, you know, put some money in the bank.
	He never spent a nickel of our money.
	I mean, he raised us, he fed us, he clothed us, he thought all those things.
	It wasn't like we were participating with our paychecks.
	Right.
	Just very unselfish.
	He taught Lee Van Cleef how to ride.
	Now, Lee Van Cleef had a lifetime of being probably Hollywood's greatest Western villain.
	And Lee Van Cleef was in New York City, about dad's age, maybe a little older, and he had an audition for High Noon.
	And he had checked all the boxes of what he could do.
	You know, actors used to do that.
	Can you tap dance?
	Of course.
	Right, right, yeah.
	Can you ride a horse?
	Of course.
	Well, Lee Van Cleef had an audition for High Noon, and it was going to be down at the stables in Manhattan, in Central Park.
	And he got nervous.
	So this was still when he was in New York.
	Oh, yeah.
	Okay.
	Yeah, Lee Van Cleef, they auditioned in high noon in New York.
	Wow.
	Okay.
	And so dad took Lee Van Cleef down to the stables in Manhattan, you know, in Central Park for three or four times and had sessions where he taught him how to ride.
	Lee Van Cleef got that part in high noon and Lee Van Cleef ended up having that career.
	I wonder if there's someone out there right now who would be telling that story.
	I remember when I saw Rance Howard and Lee Van Cleef riding horses in the middle of Central Park in a straitjacket in a padded room right now.
	Sure you did.
	Now, here's the thing.
	They were competitors.
	They were in the same business.
	Now, listen, I'm not saying I wouldn't help a fellow actor.
	However...
	I think in life, and especially in Los Angeles, it's become a little more dog-eat-dog.
	Absolutely.
	I mean, I don't think Dad...
	I mean, Lee may have paid for the rental horses, but nowadays it would be completely different.
	Right.
	I mean, listen, Dad would be wanting to know if he could get an audition, too.
	Well, maybe not your dad.
	That speaks to his character.
	I mean, it's like in stand-up.
	We were just talking about that during the break.
	All my friends are like, oh man, it's a community.
	Everyone supports each other.
	I go, yeah, get a break, get a comedy special, and see how many of those people are still around.
	In stand-up, it is brutal.
	Try to get laughs on that open mic night when there's a bunch of unemployed comics standing around.
	How hot's that audience gonna be?
	You know, you see like all these top comedians, and of course we talk about from a liberal perspective, like Amy Schumer and all these people that are just super far left, and you go, really?
	So you just all happen to be best friends, the top comics out there.
	No, what happens is after they become successful, they're not as threatened, they have kind of their lane, and all of a sudden there's camaraderie.
	But coming up, what about the guy who was the open mic-er, not Bill Burr when Louis C.K. was coming up?
	You don't know about him.
	People don't realize that when Louis C.K. was even headlining, there were six or seven other comics that were also in the mix there.
	And they have sharp elbows.
	It's also late at night.
	And it's not the healthiest environment in the world.
	It's a little like rock and roll.
	Yeah.
	Well, you know, plus he's masturbating in the green room, so that makes it a little uncomfortable.
	Now, I didn't know that.
	I've only heard of a little debauchery, not necessarily from him, but I've heard debauchery.
	Oh, no, no.
	That's what the women came for, and he said he did.
	You mean while he was, like, breaking through as a comic?
	Yeah.
	Well, at this point he was relatively successful, but he would just be fondling.
	He would be going to town in the green room and let people watch.
	I couldn't imagine spanking it and then expecting to continue to have a career.
	In public.
	Spanking privately is one thing, but if you're spanking it in public, you have to accept the fact that eventually the dominoes are going to fall.
	Well, it's an unwilling participant.
	It's also just something that wouldn't occur to me.
	She's like, look at it!
	Wouldn't he be embarrassed?
	You know, someone walked in on me naked, I'd be like, oh, I'm sorry.
	He literally shuts the door behind him, like, look at this, does this do it for you?
	They say no, and he continued.
	Well, I don't know.
	Listen, you know more than I do about these facts, and this is part of your business.
	You're going to have to take my word for it.
	I try to avoid even thinking too much about it, because really, when you do think about it, it's really sick.
	Well, it is sick.
	And you know what's funny?
	You've played like we've talked about.
	You've done some out there roles, right?
	People, you're kind of known for that.
	Fiction.
	Yeah, fiction.
	Fiction.
	But the reality in the entertainment industry, you know, we've talked about this a lot when you deal with, they say, well, there's a rape culture.
	There's this idea of, you know, people are so unhappy and that's what you see in nearly every film.
	Well, the rape culture really only exists in a few places and Hollywood is one of them.
	It's not out there in Oklahoma, the same effect.
	But is this something you kind of knew about as an open secret for a long time?
	Well, no.
	First of all, no, I was kept fairly naive by my parents.
	Not naive, but I think they allowed me to be kids as long as possible in terms of learning about that stuff, about bullying in the workplace.
	I mean, when you really think about it, there's somebody of power that somebody potentially could be hiring.
	He almost never is not at work.
	Right.
	And so if he makes a move on somebody, or even if that woman thinks he's making a move on her with the illusion that it might include employment, we have a serious litigation issue here.
	Right.
	So anyway, it's like it can be a sticky wicket.
	There have always been alpha dogs.
	Sticky dream room, yeah.
	There's always been alpha dogs.
	Right.
	In the insurance business, you want a job.
	Are you angling for an insurance job?
	You've mentioned that a few times here.
	Liberty Mutual?
	Actually, insurance is kind of part of my game these days.
	Well, okay.
	We'll get that in the lower third.
	But were you surprised with the Weinstein and as the allegations just kind of started coming out, was it something that surprised you?
	No.
	You mean that people do doggish things like what apparently Bill Cosby may have done?
	Yeah.
	No, that didn't surprise me.
	We still have to say alleged, but, I mean, we're talking about like...
	Well, yeah, and well, I wasn't there, and I haven't seen evidence or anything.
	Right.
	But, listen, when I was in my early 20s, I heard that Mr.
	Cosby, I believe the term dog, was used as a sort of not-so-affectionate nickname for him.
	Yeah.
	So, it's not something that is just...
	You know, now, the fact that there may or may not have been, like, drugs kind of mixed in there to sort of help lubricate the situation, that's really sick.
	Right.
	But just even a middle-aged man out, you know, kind of trolling, that's just something that's just not quite copacetic.
	Did you ever have anyone, like, try and, you know, take advantage of you?
	No.
	No?
	In a sense of even just, like, come on to you?
	I've had that with, like, gay wardrobe people grabbing my ass.
	I've talked about that before.
	Pretty common.
	I'll tell you what, I did recognize the first gay man that I worked with.
	I was 14 years old, and he didn't do anything.
	He was a wardrobe guy, and his name was Dyke.
	And, you know, he was a nice guy.
	And he never made a move.
	He never, genitalia, nothing, no brush, nothing.
	Right.
	But he's a trainee now, I'm sure.
	Now he's switched genders.
	Well, I don't know.
	Old Dyke, he was a good guy.
	Yeah.
	But Old Dyke certainly spent too much time about urinating in the shower when you have cold water hitting you.
	Yeah.
	Well, it is an industry where, listen, you've got to keep your head in a swivel.
	And we've had some people going like, listen, of course this doesn't surprise us.
	We know this has been going on for a long time.
	I think, obviously, like you said, you started working so young, too.
	You were somewhat shielded from it in the sense that you had great parents.
	And by the time you were old enough, they didn't have the same kind of leverage.
	Like, hey, Clint, if you want to work in this industry, come on over to the Weinstein Bouncy Hub.
	Well, yeah, you see...
	I don't think it happens every time.
	Sure.
	And I don't think...
	I mean, listen, if somebody would have taken a liking to me...
	I think having good parents.
	I don't believe my parents ever put me in a position where I could have been manipulated.
	That's a good way to put it.
	That's parents who do a good job in the industry.
	We were children.
	I mean, if that happens...
	Now, I know actresses that were juveniles.
	And I don't want to get names.
	But I know that they, in their minds, or the reality is, there were older filmmakers that had...
	With no argument you could say they took advantage of them.
	Oh, absolutely.
	So, I mean, that's just wrong, but that's human nature.
	Listen, I know...
	It's human nature, but you add the fame filter.
	And you know this, people treat you very, very differently.
	You know, if you meet someone who doesn't know who Clint Howard is, you know, by a stroke of luck, they treat you differently from someone who's at Comic-Con, right?
	It's just, there's a psychology with it.
	It's an entirely different relationship right off the bat.
	Predators have power.
	And when a predator is a powerful person, and a predator being somebody that comes on.
	Right, right, right.
	A predator, when powerful, the victim will fear.
	Sure.
	When they're an ingenue.
	Hey, listen, there's no denying that, oh, he touched me.
	I'm sexually harassed.
	Right, yeah.
	I mean, listen, you don't think that getting publicity at the advantage of some...
	Exactly, and that shortchanges the actual victims when you just have someone saying like, oh, you know, you could have accused our makeup artist of sexually harassing you because they had to get all up in there when...
	Just yesterday.
	I've got one.
	I'll tell you in a couple of years before I get sued.
	But I've got a good one about makeup, green makeup, and slow erotic dancing.
	Oh, you told us.
	Yeah.
	We can't say it on air, though.
	No, no.
	Okay, but on the flip side, take that in a softer approach, and we do have to get going.
	Softer green?
	But it's not sexual harassment, but that kind of position of power.
	You talked about this in the industry with Trump and the conservative issue this last election.
	That happens as well as, well, listen, we're lording the power over you.
	If you don't think the right way, you're not allowed at the cool kids club.
	Again, you're beyond it because you have such a catalog of work.
	You think I'm beyond it.
	So you've experienced that still?
	Well, experienced it.
	It's a factor.
	It's just, you know, now, listen...
	I would not go over to any executive's house knowing that there was going to be debauchery and sodomy or whatever.
	I just would choose not to.
	I think that's under the general debauchery umbrella.
	But there are kids, there are young actors or actresses that would gamble.
	And even if, you know, here's a chance for me to make it in my career.
	Right.
	It won't be so bad.
	I don't mean literally getting shtuped, but being in an uncomfortable situation, they take a gamble.
	I know that, of course, and I'm saying you think it goes even a step further.
	So if they're willing to take that kind of a gamble, if they're anything even remotely right of far left, you keep your mouth shut if you want to work, if you're a young kid.
	Oh, yeah.
	You mean like if some pervert took a pass at you?
	No, no.
	I'm talking about politics now, the Trump factor.
	I'm saying we go way far.
	We have sexual harassment lording power.
	But I remember people inviting me to an Obama fundraiser.
	I'll say it now.
	It was three arts.
	It was three arts.
	We were sitting down.
	We were looking at different management.
	And I said, no, thanks.
	And then questions came, and they were furious.
	Well, okay, then they probably would have been bad management to begin with.
	Right.
	Listen, and you know what?
	I did not call Barry until his presidency was over.
	I have a respect for, you know, the office.
	He was Obama, but, you know, I did a snow globe about Barry.
	Yeah.
	And he's got kind of a bruised chin.
	And it's just not that it's a huge political statement.
	It might be some jelly or it might be a bruising.
	But there's no crappy commode in there with him, right?
	But he's a bobblehead, though.
	But it wasn't until after, you know, he was president, or after he stopped being president.
	Well, yeah, I mean, I think it's no secret that obviously you're one of the more outspoken sort of conservatives in Hollywood, because at this point, you are who you are.
	You and Gary.
	The cloth's cut.
	Yeah.
	For young people, I would say, and my dad always said this, Keep the politics.
	Your job is not politics.
	Your job is to entertain.
	Right.
	And so for somebody starting out, regardless of right or wrong, conviction is one thing, and religious conviction, spiritual conviction is one thing.
	But you'd be doing yourself a favor in the business if you kept your mouth shut.
	Yes, exactly.
	Unless you're in a green room with Louis C.K. and you want to move up the stand-up ladder, then wide open.
	Double stick tape!
	Right.
	That goes back to the green paint story.
	Top stick is the really good quality car.
	All right, we'll be back.
	Clint, Howard, thank you so much for being here, sir.
	It's been a pleasure.
	My hands are cold.
	And seriously, you're dancing with that?
	You're good.
	I'm good.
	We'll do it on the way out.
	Christmas time is the time.
	I love a little family drama.
	I mean, your brother really embarrassed you.
	And he didn't do s**t!
	Don't stop on my account.
	Did you finish the song?
	You gonna finish the song?
	Or you?
	Let's stay with you.
	Finish the song for me.
	I love a little Christmas cheer.
	Finish the song.
	Christmas tree, my Christmas tree, I'll...
	Ah!
	Oh!
	Oh!
	Good night.
	Really?
	I went down to their gift shop and I spoke with Twanto.
	And he told me what it was like.
	And then I had dinner with him at the Chop House in the traditional Indian garb.
	Levi's.
	So self-important.
	Which I appreciate.
	Clint Howard is a lot of fun.
	Clint Howard, a lot of fun.
	By the way, behind the scenes...
	Also a lot of fun.
	He is a handful.
	Oh, gosh.
	He's all over.
	He's exactly what you'd expect.
	He's very...
	The thing is, he's really sharp.
	He's very smart.
	When he zones in.
	Yeah.
	But when he doesn't feel like it, when he's just sort of relaxed, it's just like, and this.
	And it's like a ping pong ball.
	You're like, whoa, hold on.
	It's like flubber.
	I'm thinking of my bathtub.
	You're like, yeah.
	He sent...
	He sent my dad.
	Your dad.
	So many pictures of him in a hot tub.
	It was like a...
	It was a documentary of his travels.
	Yeah.
	And photos that would have made Ron Jeremy blush.
	Yeah.
	Like...
	It was weird.
	But it wasn't at all in a sexual thing.
	It was really weird.
	It was like, oh, this is Clint.
	No, this is just Clint.
	This is just Clint.
	So, speaking of which, next week, all of your crowd are favorites.
	We'll bring up the card here when we talk about our going to be on the live stream.
	16-hour CNN live stream and the series premiere of a YouTube carol.
	Yes.
	The story of Ebenezer YouTube redemption, YouTube Christmas past, present, future, where they're going.
	Will he get it right with his covetous, sinful, censoring ways?
	Sinful bag.
	We'll see.
	We will see.
	We probably won't.
	It's funny, we were just talking about this kind of with Clint.
	He was just mentioning, and you were talking about this, how his parents shielded him from kind of the filth of Hollywood.
	Yeah, I thought it was very interesting.
	I thought it was very cool.
	You don't hear it very often.
	You hear a lot of kids who were just royally screwed in Hollywood.
	Oh yeah, and now we turn a blind eye into it when it's Chaz, what's Chaz, not Chaz, I am Jazz.
	I am Jazz.
	Chaz is a tranny.
	Jazz is a tranny.
	The Az tranny gang.
	The Zs.
	I think they really like the Zs.
	They really like the Zs.
	It has a little bzazz.
	Well, the Z. They also want to use Z pronouns.
	Maybe there's a tie in there.
	I have no idea.
	I never even thought of this before.
	We're blowing the lid wide open!
	I know.
	It's the Z chromosomes.
	Think about it.
	Now we should ignore it.
	We knew it was Corey Haim and Corey Feldman.
	I Am Jazz is going to have sex change.
	It had a sex change operation.
	Now couldn't actually do it successfully because there wasn't enough material to make a fake vagina.
	No one wants to talk about how this is exploiting a child.
	No.
	Because it's still not cool.
	It wasn't cool back then.
	It's not cool now.
	It was never cool for parents to shield.
	I guarantee you the kids on set were Clint...
	And Ron were there?
	They probably thought they were nerds.
	Yeah, they thought they were losers.
	Yeah, which is funny because it's coming full circle now where the people who are honest with themselves, I think, are waking up to see that.
	You tie that in with Mike Pence, who was mocked, what, eight months ago?
	Yeah.
	For all the comments about being loyal to his wife and not being caught one-on-one with a woman where his accusations could even be taken seriously.
	Right.
	And mocked.
	Mocked, mocked, mocked.
	I'm sure Clint Howard was mocked.
	Because it wasn't cool.
	It wasn't cool.
	It wasn't cool.
	Mike Pence, what a dork.
	Yeah, what a loser.
	Bet you no one comes out in the case of rape in a room because no one was there.
	Or what a super predator because he can't be around women.
	Right, exactly.
	But I think honest people are realizing that, oh, people with some standards and some freaking values may have had it right.
	Well, you know what?
	I think a lot of the, if you look at the alt-right and sort of Trump, no one cares about your principles or your values.
	Actually, turns out half of the people who you thought were your buddies do with Roy Moore.
	Roy Moore.
	Wasn't really cool with the Trump thing to say, you know what, this really isn't going to play well.
	Yeah, just so much winning.
	Winning, winning, winning.
	Who cares?
	No one cares.
	Turns out a lot of people care.
	Wasn't cool to say.
	I remember at that point it caught so much flack.
	I said, listen, I think he's better than Hillary.
	Absolutely.
	But if he said that about my wife, I would kick his ass.
	Wasn't cool to say that.
	Well, guess what?
	45% of people who showed up for Trump didn't show up for Roy Moore.
	Sometimes it's not cool.
	Sometimes the right thing is not cool.
	When I was on set, I remember DW on Arthur.
	It was a boy who did the voice of DW. I won't say which one.
	I felt deceived.
	He just made fun of me.
	I was 12.
	I was 12.
	And he was 13.
	And he was just smoking weed.
	Just what a dork.
	Because my parents were really also pretty protective of me when I was on set as a kid.
	I was on set quite a bit.
	And it was not cool.
	It was not cool at all.
	Not cool for Mike Pence to do that.
	Not cool.
	This is another thing.
	People say, oh man, you're an idiot.
	You know what?
	I just take every issue individually.
	Of course you take every issue individually.
	That's how you become someone with principles.
	And then you find out which worldview lines up with your principles.
	No worldview lines up 100% with all of your principles.
	No political party does.
	Hell, not even any religion out there does.
	But when you take every issue individually, you say, okay, this is my list of non-negotiables.
	And it's not cool because we don't like labels, man.
	We'll vote D. Ted Kennedy?
	Yeah.
	Kill the chick?
	Doesn't matter.
	D. D. D. For 40 years.
	You take your list and you line it up with who is closest to your list.
	In this case, yeah.
	Put it this way.
	I've always said, I'll never vote for a Democrat.
	I'm not a registered Republican.
	I don't think I am.
	Really?
	No, I don't think I was in the last state because of the primary laws.
	But still, I'm very open about it.
	Well, you're too much of an ideologue.
	Really?
	Well, what do you believe?
	Well, I don't know.
	I think it's okay.
	But then I think Roy Moore is kind of a dick.
	And, you know, I support the net neutrality.
	And I think the death tax is a good idea.
	But I don't, you know, because who needs more than $11 million?
	Oh, yeah, you're really taking issues individually.
	Yeah.
	Really, you're thinking of this world through the lens critically, Plato.
	It amazes me.
	It's not cool at all to have a worldview.
	It's not cool to be an ideologue when everyone who's ever been successful, ever!
	Has had an ideology, whether it's sports, whether it's politics, whether it's philosophy, whether it's the realm of intelligentsia, even if it's a philosophy, some kind of worldview to your work approach.
	Here's something I find really interesting, and I hear this more and more.
	We heard it the other day from somebody.
	I won't name who it was, but it was someone who identified as a liberal.
	But they said, but don't worry, I'm an open-minded liberal.
	I think at one point in time, that used to be assumed by liberals that, hey, they were the open-minded ones, conservatives were the dogmatic.
	I don't know why they say that, though.
	You know why they say that?
	They say, I'm liberal, but I'm open-minded.
	You know why I say that?
	Because for the longest time, it was really uncool to be conservative.
	Yeah.
	Right?
	So if you just say, oh, I'm open-minded, people go, oh, okay, so you're libertarian.
	You're one of the cool ones, yeah.
	You're conservative.
	No, no, no, I'm a liberal.
	I'm a liberal.
	I'm not a freak show.
	Because they don't want to be one of the uncool kids.
	That's why I always hated the term libertarian.
	As I'm a libertarian conservative to describe my views, I certainly would be much more libertarian than many people out there who claim to be libertarian.
	But Bill Maher, Greg Gutfeld, and Glenn Beck all claim to be libertarian, so it doesn't mean anything anymore.
	Let's say I'm more libertarian in my views of limited government, but I'm a conservative.
	I would go out of my way to say that because I knew it was trying to shuck the uncool label of conservative.
	That's uncool.
	You know what's really uncool?
	To have no idea what it is that you believe.
	To me, the death tax was so simple.
	We talked about that earlier this week, and someone actually said this.
	They said net neutrality, the death tax is such a great example of how Stephen's either A, a sheep, B, a shell, or C is too much of an ideologue to see his own party's BS. No one needs more than $11 million in a death tax.
	Okay, hold on a second.
	First off...
	Yeah, the big death tax has paid me off.
	I mean, who pays you off for the death tax?
	Who would be the adversary to the death tax aside from people who want to pass on their financial legacy to their children?
	But here's something that's really simple.
	And this can only be a response when you have a worldview.
	I just say, well, how do you prepare for the change of my mind?
	You know what?
	It's simple when you're okay with the fact that you have an ideology.
	My ideology means that all men are created equal.
	They're free.
	The government doesn't have the right to tell you what you can or can't do in your own home, what you can say.
	It doesn't have the right to tell you if you can or can't defend yourself.
	It doesn't have the right to take your stuff.
	It doesn't have the right to take more than half your stuff after it's already taxed you for half your stuff.
	But this person said, who needs $11 million?
	Especially when those lazy kids haven't earned it.
	Big death tax.
	It's just Green Reaper in a suit.
	But think of this for a second.
	Especially with those, especially with the kids haven't earned, you know, Republicans, but you always about earned.
	The kids didn't earn it.
	Neither did you.
	You wouldn't be able to understand this.
	Is it dogmatic to think, hey, listen, yeah, my kids didn't earn that money.
	Maybe my kids were raised with a silver spoon.
	Who knows?
	Maybe my kids are wealthy.
	They also happen to be really good kids.
	But they didn't earn it.
	Neither did you, Mr.
	Wants to take 65% or 68%, depending if it's Barack Obama or Hillary Clinton.
	So this comes down to your ideology.
	It comes down to a really uncool being an ideologue.
	Who deserves it more, my children or Debbie Wasserman Schultz?
	You're picking somebody who hasn't earned it, but it's not cool.
	It's not cool to sit down and say, oh, because I am a conservative...
	I think that's wrong.
	Oh, you know what?
	Because I am a conservative, because I have these principles, ah, if Roy Moore, if Roy Moore sexually assaulted someone, I have a problem with it.
	Now you have that with the alt-right, right?
	They go after you.
	They go, oh, no, your conservative principles are dying.
	Remember that?
	Yeah.
	Remember all these people are going after Ben Shapiro and myself?
	Oh, you're going to die with your principles.
	No, now you're dying when you abandon the principles.
	You see what happens.
	It's not cool to shield your kid as Clint's parents.
	It's not cool to say I'm not going out with women who aren't my wife.
	It's not cool to say you're a conservative.
	It's not cool to say that you have a religious worldview, but sometimes it's the best thing.
	You know what really isn't cool?
	This is one thing, too.
	It's really not cool to work hard.
	Think about that.
	The whole idea of cool is being nonchalant.
	In any sport, right, you'd have these kids who would want to end zone dance or throw the ball.
	Remember when I played sports as a kid?
	Before they got good.
	When I was competing in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, you would have these kids come in with all of the geese and the new gear, and they would just walk up and try and be like, listen, man, it's about flowing, about being relaxed, and they would get smoked.
	From the uncool kid who spent 20 hours a week drilling one move.
	It's not cool.
	It doesn't look awesome.
	It's not the slam dunk, stick your tongue out at the camera, but you're a Clydesdale.
	You're putting the work in.
	Usually the uncool thing is the right thing.
	As a matter of fact, almost always, and it's not just to be contrarian, almost always if something is labeled cool, it's wrong.
	I mean, from torn Levi's to MC Hammer.
	To stupid your girlfriend.
	To share.
	To being gender, non-binary, LGBTQ, AAIP, and a number two.
	We're going to look back on this trend and say, remember when that was cool?
	Man, we were really dumb.
	So don't give a rat's ass about cool.
	Stop thinking about cool.
	We're looking at all these stories through the prism of cool, and that's what's so ironic is you're an ideologue.
	Really?
	Your ideology is trying to be cool.
	And then you say, keep it real, bruh.
	Really?
	Keep it real, bruh, as long as it's within this context of cool.
	Well, I'm keeping it real.
	I'm keeping it real.
	I don't go out to dinner with someone alone who's not my wife.
	Loser?
	Eh, you know what?
	I'll take loser.
	I'll take uncool loser over a lifetime of being a loser.
	But hey, you're one cool losing bastard.
	See you next week.
	That is December 21st, Thursday, 16-hour live stream CNN. That's torturous.
	Worse than waterborne.
	That's why we're doing it.

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