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Oct. 29, 2020 - Jimmy Dore Show
01:12:41
20201029_TJDS_20201028_Podcast
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Get ready for an outstanding entertainment program.
The Jimmy Dore Show.
Hi, this is Jimmy.
Who's this?
Jimmy, it's Vince.
Vince Vaughn.
Oh, hi, Vince.
How are you doing?
I'm freezing.
What?
Why?
Where are you, buddy?
I don't know.
I'm stranded.
I'm lost.
Okay, Vince, slow down.
Tell me what happened.
I was at a Trump rally last night on the outskirts of town.
It was amazing.
Donald Trump was there and the spirit of America.
But then he left, Jimmy.
He took off in an airplane and they didn't make arrangements to bust us back home.
So we all just sort of stood around waiting and it got colder and colder.
So I decided to wander off into the forest because I thought maybe it would be warmer in there, you know, because of the trees.
And now I'm lost in the forest and it's nighttime and I'm lonely and frightened.
Oh, okay.
Why did you call our show instead of someone who could actually help you?
I don't know.
I'm sorry.
I'm not thinking very clearly right now.
Oh, okay.
Okay.
Sorry.
He just left us, Jimmy.
How could he do that?
How could he just abandon us?
Vince, it's because he doesn't care about you or anyone or anything.
That can't be true.
That man was put here by God to save America.
This suffering that I'm enduring due to his actions, it must have some kind of meaning.
No, it doesn't.
It must, Jimmy.
It must.
It's the only way I can process my predicament while keeping my sense of identity attacked.
This sounds kind of like a religious thinking.
He's trying to teach us something.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
What?
This is a lesson.
He needs us to be stronger so we can fight for him.
And the path to strength leads to suffering.
Joseph Campbell shit, bitch.
I don't think.
It's all so clear to me now.
Wow.
What an honor.
Thank you, Donald J. Trump.
It is an honor to be fucking freezing to death on your behalf, sir.
Vince, you need to get to safety, buddy.
What, and reject this beautiful gift I've just been given?
No, excuse me.
Thank you.
I will be suffering right here for at least a little while longer.
Maybe, maybe get a little frostbite like a Revolutionary War Patriot.
Wait, what was that?
Vince, I think I heard a wolf howl there.
Okay, I gotta get the fuck out of here.
Help me, Jimmy Dore.
Okay, Vince, what do you see?
Okay, to my right, I see some buildings and lights in the distance.
To the left, it's very dark, just dense forest as far as the eye can see.
Oh, all right.
I need you to go right towards the buildings and the lights.
Are you sure?
Because I was thinking to the left.
It might be warmer there because of the more trees.
Okay, Vince, you seem to be under an impression that trees generate heat and they do not.
Please go write.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Okay, okay, fine.
But I'm a little nervous about the wolf.
What else lives in woods?
Bigfoot?
Dinosaurs?
The dinosaurs are extinct, Vince.
Yeah, I know, but all of them?
How can we be so sure?
Is that not the very arrogance of man?
I promise you, you need to get to safety, Vince.
All right, okay, okay.
All right, you know what?
All right.
Hey, nice chat, Jimmy.
I hope you liberal pussies enjoy getting your asses handy to you on November 3rd.
MAGA, baby.
I'm going to get a filet of fucking fish.
Establishment media sets of August fighting.
So good luck the bullshit we can't afford.
Watch and see as a jackal comedian who speeds and jumps the medium and hits him head-on.
It's the Jimmy Door show.
Hey, everybody, welcome to this week's Jimmy Dore show.
I'm Jimmy Dore, and I've been canceled more times than the five-cent stamp.
You know, this week, Pope Francis called COVID-19 a lady who must be obeyed.
It's probably the closest the Catholic Church will ever come to giving women control over their lives.
Am I right?
Come on.
You know, the biggest problem Democrats are going to face after winning the White House is Trump leaving the country because that means they'll actually have to come up with a platform.
Hey, scientists just announced after years of searching they found water on the moon.
Don't worry, we're not going to ban fracking there either.
You know, NASA's Humble Space Telescope also discovered an asteroid with a metal content that could be worth $10,000 quadrillion dollars.
Put into Earth terms, that's how much it now costs to go to college.
Hey, what's coming up on today's Jimmy Dore show?
Why does journalism suck in America?
The answer just may surprise you, or will it?
It has something to do with the richest man on the planet and the CIA.
Plus, on 60 Minutes, Kamala Harris is asked if she is a progressive or a socialist.
And that's when the interview gets weird.
Democrats arrogantly believe they have the so-called black bolt locked up.
But do they really?
The answer is going to surprise them.
America is a failed state.
Don't believe me.
Just see how the establishment expects GoFundMe to save the American people.
Plus, we got phone calls today from Vince Vaughn, Chuck Schumer, Barack Obama, and Joe Biden, plus a lot more.
That's today on a Jimmy Dore show.
Amy Coney Barrett is confirmed to the Supreme Court.
You know why?
Because Democrats are feckless frauds.
The Democrats have allowed Republicans to seat over 250 federal judges and three Supreme Court justices without a fight.
These right-wing judges will be with us for the rest of our lives.
Democrats could have denied unanimous consent for procedural votes.
They didn't.
Democrats could have demanded quorum from Republicans for process votes.
They didn't.
Democrats could have filibustered amendments and filled endless procedural challenges.
They didn't.
Pelosi could have coordinated impeachment of Trump or William Barr To force the Senate into procedural session.
She didn't.
Democrats could have gummed up the nomination, but they didn't have the guts.
In a press conference last week, Chuck Schumer floated the possibility of the Democratic Senate caucus denying quorum.
He didn't.
Dems could have used every trick to stall the nomination past election day, but Democrats are lazy, arrogant, and stupid.
It wasn't Jill Stein that prevented Democrats from having any balls.
The Democratic Party leadership is a disgrace.
The only power they wield is forwarding the Republican Wall Street agenda without appearing to be the authors.
Yet they will continue to fundraise off their Supreme Court failure.
That's the real game here.
Democrats approve these judges because Wall Street approves them.
And they get the added bonus that progressive legislation will be almost impossible unless the court is expanded.
The political theater is endless.
So that's what I have to say about that.
But guess what?
Look who Joe Biden's looking to put in his cabinet.
Gina Ramundo being considered as Biden's Treasury Secretary.
She's a Rhode Island governor.
She would not be a popular selection among progressives or organized labor.
Not popular with progressives, right on brand for the Democrats.
Wow.
Joe Biden's transition team has informed Democratic officials that Gina Raimundo is under consideration as the next Secretary of the Treasury should Biden win the election, multiple sources have confirmed.
Other options include Ebenezer Screws, the ghost of Andrew Carnegie, and an Ayn Rand hologram.
This is what you're voting for.
You guys vote?
You happy?
You guys proud of yourselves?
This is what you voted for.
This is your antidote to Trump.
Raimundo has built her career on subservience to Wall Street, and her selection would be an affront to organized labor, said David Seagal, executive director of Demand Progress.
She has built her career on subservience to Wall Street, and her selection would be an affront to organized labor.
So she's a big grassroots organizer, right?
That's what I'm getting.
Raimondo, governor of Rhode Island, is a former venture capitalist who took the governor's mansion on the strength of millions of dollars in Wall Street donations.
Raimundo's name will stir the long memories of union leaders.
Union leaders will all give out a collective, ah, shit.
Unions have held a grudge with her for years over her tenure as state treasurer.
Why would she do?
Well, when she cut pension benefits for public employees while steering over a billion dollars in state money to hedge fund investments.
So she's a real-life supervillain.
Isn't that amazing?
She's a real-life supervillain, and Joe Biden's going to put her in his cabinet.
This is what you're voting for.
Here's Joe.
You want to see what else you're voting for?
Here's Joe Biden.
Paul Ryan was correct when he did the tax code.
What's the first thing he decided we had to go after?
Social Security and Medicare.
Now, we need to do something about Social Security and Medicare.
Thank you.
That's the only way you can find room to pay for it.
I don't know.
He gets giddy about screwing over Medicare, and he gets giddy about it.
They just gave $5 trillion to the richest oligarchs in the country, and he's telling you we can't afford Social Security.
He needs to lean closer to the mic to avoid smelling his own bullshit.
That's what I think he does.
He leans so close to that mic, you'd think it was an eight-year-old girl's hair.
Senator, we have a deficit.
We have Social Security and Medicare looming.
The number of people on Social Security Medicare is now 40 million.
People, it's going to be 80 million in 15 years.
Would you consider looking at those programs, age of eligibility, cost of living, put it all on the table?
The answer is absolutely you have to.
You have to.
You got to.
I mean, come on.
I mean, common sense says that you got to.
Well, here, what's wrong?
The political advisors say to me is, whoa, don't touch that third.
Look, the American people aren't stupid.
It's a real simple proposition.
We have to do, you and I were talking about Bob Dole earlier.
I was one.
All right.
I've had enough.
American people aren't stupid.
They know we can't afford to take care of our old people.
We got to cut Medicare and Social Security.
We're in a huge deficit hole.
How are we going to get out of this hole unless we push a bunch of old people in it?
Thank you.
Thank you.
He's been trying to cut Social Security and Medicare his whole goddamn career.
Now he's going to put a woman in the cabinet who just cut retirement benefits for union workers.
Okay.
Wow.
A lawyer says the family of a black man who was killed when police fired on him more than a dozen times in Philadelphia had called for an ambulance to get him help with the mental health crisis, not for police intervention.
So I just want to point out the reason why I showed you all these clips, because of who he's putting in his cabinet and Joe Biden has been trying to loot Social Security and Medicare his whole life.
And they just did loot the Treasury.
They got $5 trillion for their richest oligarch friends.
And so a lawyer says the family of a black man who was killed when police fired on him more than a dozen times had called for an ambulance to get him help, not for police intervention.
Joe Biden, Biden says no excuse for looting.
So it's okay for his rich friends in suits and ties to loot the American Treasury, but black people are being gunned down in the street left and right by the state without any repercussions.
That's the looting that he wants.
There's no excuse for it.
other looting it's okay but Hey, Joe, they were just shooting Walmart in the leg.
They weren't looting.
Rumsfeld says looting is a transition to freedom.
You remember that Iraq war you voted for and you wagged your finger at people for not supporting even after it started and everyone knew it was horrible.
Joe Biden, the Iraq war.
Remember that?
The Iraq war that you loved?
Well, the guy who ran it said looting is a transition to freedom.
So maybe that's What they're doing when they're looting, Joe Federal Reserve to lend an additional one trillion today to large banks.
That's not looting, though, right?
That's not looting.
In the first chance some of y'all got, y'all took your asses home and started talking Biden Harris.
How the fuck we spent all summer talking about abolish the police?
And the first chance we get, we've been up here talking about voting in the author of the crime bill is someone that calls himself a top cop.
The math ain't fucking mathin!
The math ain't mathin!
Which one is it?
We have to be clearer than ever what we are out here fighting for.
This ain't no cute little movement.
This ain't no tweet.
This ain't no fucking Instagram post.
Our people are trying to live.
So there you go.
There's black people saying after a whole summer of protests, we're about to vote in the author of the crime bill and someone who calls herself the top cop.
Thank you.
Hey, maybe if I vote for Trump, I can push him to the left.
So expecting Biden and Harris to do anything about police brutality is like expecting an insurance company to solve our health care crisis.
That's not happening.
So there you go.
So now, I mean, I don't know.
I could, I'm just warming up doing these segments about how horrible Joe Biden and Kamala Harris are.
Because you could do it and his cabinet.
I mean, this is amazing.
This is amazing.
This is like Nixon shit that Joe Biden's doing.
And you got to vote for it, or you're not a good person.
And then everybody else can go to sleep after Joe Biden's praise and go back to brunch.
Okay.
Wow.
And they got all those progressives.
AOC endorses him.
The Sunshine, all the environmental groups endorse him.
What is that group called?
Why come I'm blanking on the name?
Is it called Sunshine?
What is that environmental group run by the young kids?
The young kids.
The young kids.
Sunshine movement?
What is it?
Is it the Sunshine Movement?
I think it's called.
Maybe that's old.
I don't know what it is.
Sunrise movement.
Sunrise.
That's it.
Of young people uniting to stop.
That's it.
I was right.
Young people.
I was right.
Okay.
So they've got their Joe Biden's got their endorsement.
Hey, he's not everything we want.
So there you go.
And all the Justice Democrats are telling you to vote for this.
This is it.
This is what this is why you vote for progressives so they support this shit.
Really?
Instead of screaming about it?
Yep.
And now you know why Joe Biden becomes president.
Things are going to get worse, man.
Way worse.
Who do you think Joe Biden's going to take care of?
He's going to take care of the billionaire class first, and then the millionaire class.
And by the time he gets around to you, it's going to be just like it was with COVID.
They got nothing.
Wow.
Wow, Chuck Schumer's on the line.
I wonder how he's taking the Amy Baird confirmation.
Hello?
Oh, my goodness.
This is the last straw, Jimmy.
I am almost beyond words with these Republicans and all their shenanigans and such.
So what happens next, Chuck?
I'll tell you what happens next, and excuse my language, but it's time to really get down to brass tacks and lay down the law to these bullies that they can't ride roughshod over this country's traditions.
What's your strategy, Chuck?
I'm going to come right out and say it.
There is no way to express this gently.
I am formally voicing my opposition to Amy Coney Barrett, and you may quote me on that.
Yeah, but the Senate just confirmed her to the Supreme Court.
I understand your frustration, Jimmy.
And I assure you, right down to my bottom dollar, Nancy and I will use every arrow in our quivers to stop dark money flooding into politics, the limiting of voting rights, and curtailing the right to choose.
This is our sacred pledge to you, the American voters.
Okay, but why didn't you do anything before?
Wow, this just came out of the blue, didn't it?
Like a freight train.
No one expected this to happen, Jimmy.
Apparently, we're playing a whole new ball game here, my friend.
These people just don't want to play by the rules with all their kibbitzing and such.
Well, I've had it.
It ends here.
Wow, you sound angry.
Angry is not an adequate word to describe it, Jimmy.
I am miffed.
Miffed?
Yes, Jimmy.
I know that Mitch McConnell thinks that this will eventually blow over, but he is wrong.
The Republicans will never, never get their credibility back with these kind of antics.
We have arrows.
So you're going to use those arrows Nancy talked about then?
Oh, yes.
Make no mistake.
We are very much prepared to use those arrows.
We have quivers and quivers full of arrows.
And boy, let me tell you, are we ever going to show them to the people?
And we are going to display those arrows in a very stern and forceful manner for added emphasis so the whole world may see those arrows.
Well, where have you been?
Where have those arrows been all this time?
In our quiver, prepared for action.
Yeah, and where the hell is your quiver?
I think it's in the back of the closet underneath the stairs behind some old family pictures.
You know how mom is about that stuff?
You can't take it out without disturbing the other boxes.
And before you know it, you got old Christmas decorations on the floor and tinsel everywhere.
And land's sakes alive, I don't want to think about the disorder that happens once the cat gets in it.
Huh?
Such a mess you would not believe.
Christmas, Chuck, aren't you Jewish?
I'm covering all my bases.
Anyway, I want the American people to know we will not stop the struggle.
We have six more days until the election, and it can almost guarantee the president will not try to confirm another justice before then.
And that's all Because the Democratic Party is out there in the trenches fighting for you.
Well, thanks for that inspiring message, Chuck.
I can see why they call you the master of the Senate.
You're welcome, Jimmy.
Now comes the time I must ask something of you.
All this impassioned pleading really takes a toll on our party's resources.
Will you please take the time now to make a contribution?
No, thanks.
Please.
Please.
Come on.
Anybody there?
Okay, I'll wait.
I'll be all right here.
Don't worry.
Anybody there?
Thank you so much, by the way, for letting me sit here waiting for your reply.
Oh, dear, maybe he forgot I was on the line.
All right.
I'll make sure he'll call me back tomorrow.
Dum-di-dum-da-dum.
Okay, we'll talk later, I guess.
Hanging up now.
Bye-bye.
Later.
Okay, bye.
Call me back, okay?
This is Chuck Schumer.
I'll just call back tomorrow.
No problem.
Bye.
Bye.
Who built the cages, Joe?
Joe, who built the cages?
Who built those cages, Joe?
He should have just said that all night.
That and why did you, why didn't you do this four years ago?
Why didn't you do this four years ago?
That's what he should have said.
The whole first debate and this debate.
What, Jimmy?
Are you suggesting that the problems that we're experiencing right now just didn't happen overnight?
They did not start in January 2017, it turns out.
This is Frank Luntz, the right-wing pollster, pollster.
He tweeted this out.
He says, Nearly my entire group of undecided say they're more disheartened instead of excited by this election compared to previous ones.
Neither candidate speaks to me or my issues.
They care more about winning than they do about serving.
That's Frank Lunt's focus group.
Not Michael Moore's.
I just want to make sure that's not Jeffrey Toobin down at the bottom.
Yeah, I just want to make sure.
Anyway, she's interviewing three working-class black women and who say they're not going to vote for Joe Biden.
I think that's Chris Jensen.
Yeah.
So here's some more of it.
I am totally undecided.
I'd write your name in at this point.
Usually by now, I would have voted already, but I'm just not comfortable with either one of them right now.
What are you looking for?
What do you need to hear?
Let's start at the.
What are you looking for?
What do you need to hear?
How has the guy who wrote the crime bill disappointed you?
What are you looking for?
Do you want him to actually do something for you?
Do you want him to have a policy that makes your life better or the country's?
Is that what you guys are?
Crime bill and the fact that he has not only not apologized, not only not.
He has not only not rectified every time he reverts back to Will.
It was some black caucus members in the church where they were with it too.
Okay, you fooled them as well.
You know, you never said, I'm sorry.
You know, it's like, I didn't do it.
I want to hear an ironclad plan.
I don't want to hear if this or if that or after the election.
Does the presence of Kamala Harris on the Democratic ticket sway you at all?
Not at all.
I don't know who said she had our vote.
She does not.
We were supposed to grab on.
Oh, who said she had our vote?
Rich.
She goes, oh, that was me.
Snap.
By the way, they're asking for a long, overdue apology from Joe Biden for the crime bill.
They're asking for a long overdue apology, and even that's too much to ask for.
Kamala with the black girl magic, but that didn't happen because she didn't write her wrongs.
Like, I hold officials accountable.
I don't care what color you are.
And I think that too often we automatically think that because someone looks like you, that they're going to have your best interests at heart.
And that's just not simply true.
Look at Barack Obama, for instance.
Joe Biden did the 1994 crime bill, which created mass incarceration, created more prisons, created longer sentencing, escalated the war on drugs, and targeted African Americans.
That's Joe Biden.
And he was proud of it.
He said, we do everything except hang you for jaywalking in our bill.
He was proud of it.
Who needs Nixon when you got Joe Biden?
Who needs Trump when you got Joe Biden?
Liberals are absolutely livid at the prospect that black people might want something in exchange for their vote.
So here's someone who tweets out: theory undersided black women voters spoke to my colleague about why Joe Biden has yet to earn their vote, despite everything that Donald Trump has said and done during their presidency.
I just don't get it, is what he's saying.
I just don't get it after everything you've seen from Biden.
I mean, from Trump.
Well, here's some more.
Here's some more stuff that is going to blow your mind.
This is from 2016.
This is right after Trump beat Hillary Clinton.
So the New York Times sent a reporter to some barbershops in Milwaukee to see why the black people wouldn't be voting and why Hillary lost.
Many in Milwaukee neighborhood didn't vote and don't regret it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Do you remember that?
Do you remember that?
The DNC not learning from history.
Manon Sabir, owner of the juice kitchen, said Barack Obama's election was like going to the beach.
Then he said eight years happened.
And that was that.
And then eight years happened.
Their lives didn't get better.
Here's another guy, Ian Pfeiffer, a cook at Jake's Delicatessen, said he did not vote.
We were stuck between Trump and Hillary, he said.
They really left us with no choice.
The election was notable as much for the people who did not show up as for those who did.
At the Milwaukee barbershop, only two of them had voted.
But there were no regrets.
This is about the people who, after Trump got elected, they were not regretting not voting.
Who?
Minorities in Milwaukee were not regretting Trump being elected.
They were not regretting not voting for Hillary Clinton.
I don't feel bad.
Milwaukee is tired.
Both of them were terrible.
They never do anything for us anyway.
Talk of politics in the barbershop inevitably comes back to one man, Barack Obama.
Mr. Obama's election infused many here with a feeling of connection to national politics they had never before experienced.
But their lives have not gotten better.
And sourness set in.
So they voted for Barack Obama twice.
Their lives got worse.
And now sourness has set in.
I'm so numb, said John Toney, 45.
He said no president in his lifetime had done anything to improve the lives of black people, including Mr. Obama, whom he voted for twice.
It's like I should have known this would happen.
We're worse off than before.
But it's really Jill Stein's fault, right?
Or my fault, or Susan Sarandon, or anybody who doesn't have power.
Someone else who doesn't have power, right?
Not the people who actually could have gotten these votes.
As far as the claims of racism that have dogged Mr. Trump, Mr. Babar wasn't so worried.
It's better than smiling to my face, but going behind closed doors and voting against our kids, he said, which is what Joe Biden does and did.
He was real, unlike a lot of liberal Democrats who are just as racist, but keep it hidden, he said, his jaw slathered with shaving cream.
Still, he voted for Mrs. Clinton, as did many others here.
Here is Ice Cube.
The way it looks, they don't have a plan.
Everybody's, you know, talking about get Trump out, get Trump out, get Trump out.
If you vote, that's going to happen on the first day.
So now what?
Trump out.
Now what?
What?
What do we get in the first hundred days?
That's what we're trying to figure out.
What do we actually get that they could give us overnight like that?
They just pulled $3 trillion out their ass and gave it to their friends.
That's American taxpayer money.
That's your money that they just gave away.
And then there's half 42% of black businesses closing.
None of that money.
Where's our fucking bill out?
Where's the bell out?
Not the PPP loan that they didn't give us.
Where's the bell out?
I don't want to hear about deficit.
I don't want to hear about what our generations are going to have to pay.
Because if we don't have shit, they ain't going to have shit anyway to pay nothing.
So we got to start something right now.
Democrats don't seem like they got a plan.
Republicans don't seem like they got a plan for us.
So how the hell are you going to vote for them?
Make them earn that vote.
They can start today.
They ain't got it yet.
They can start today.
Make their ass earn that vote, man.
Stop playing with these people and they'll stop playing with you.
Wow.
White Hollywood blue check would be really mad at that black guy.
He's privileged.
He doesn't know what he's talking about.
How dare he not vote for the people who've been fucking him over his whole life?
How dare you?
By the way, Joe Biden's a rich donor's nothing would fundamentally change if he's elected.
I can't believe that just wasn't his campaign slogan.
I have reached the regrettable conclusion that the Negro's greatest stumbling block in his stride toward freedom is not the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate.
The white moderate who is more devoted to order than to justice, who prefers a negative peace, which is the absence of tension, to a positive peace, which is the presence of justice.
Who constantly says, I agree with your goals, but I cannot agree with your methods of direct action.
Who paternalistically believes he can set the timetable for another man's freedom, who lives by the mythical concept of time and constantly advises to wait for a more convenient season.
Who said that the white moderate was the greater obstacle to black people than the Ku Klux Klanner?
Who said this?
Martin Luther King Jr. said this.
And this is what he's talking about.
He's talking about this guy.
The white moderate who is more devoted to order than to justice, who prefers a negative piece, which is the absence of tension, to a positive piece, which is the presence of justice.
There it is.
The Negro's greatest stumbling block and his stride towards freedom is not the Ku Klux Klan-er, but the white moderate.
The Negro's greatest stumbling block and his stride towards freedom is not the Ku Klux Klan-er.
Okay, there you go.
Now maybe you know why blacks won't vote Biden.
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Hey, Barack Obama's calling from the campaign trail.
Hello.
Hi, Jimmy.
I'm calling you from a campaign trip.
I feel like I have purpose again.
I'm so excited.
It feels so good to get out of Martha's Vineyard.
Our new place gets so darn cramped sometimes.
It feels good to get back in front of loving audiences again.
Oh, yeah, Jimmy.
I've given so many speeches.
I now got carpal pointy index finger knuckle.
Carpal pointy index finger knuckle.
Yeah, you know the thing.
Where you qualify point at a non-threatening manner while sidestepping an important subject with bullshit, dime-store phraseology.
Wow, you're really working it.
I know.
The crowds love it when I look into the air, hopefully.
And fake gesticulate.
Joe Biden is going to win this thing and continue the Obama legacy.
Did you read the thing I just wrote for the New Yorker about our great struggle to give health care to America?
Your great struggle?
It's probably the best presidential memoir ever.
Beautifully written.
Walking on the South Lawn with the light fading in the streets of purple and gold.
And while I was engaged in the greatest struggle of my life to give everybody affordable health care where they could pick whatever doctor they want.
Did that ever happen?
No fucking way.
Get out of your mind.
Don't be a Republican roadblocks, Jimmy.
I couldn't get anything done.
No, no.
Then what legacy is Biden running on exactly?
I just told you, asshole.
Access to health care based on class status and land ownership.
You passed the ACA with 60 votes and modified it through reconciliation.
The reconciliation bill contained the public option, and you took it out.
You had the simple majority votes to keep it in.
Why did you take it out, Barack?
And anger my Republican colleagues?
I couldn't do that.
Then they'd roadblock all my legislation.
But you kept saying they did anyway.
That's the progressives' fault for forcing us to put in the public option.
Which you had Harry Reed take out because we didn't want to anger our Republican colleagues.
Then they roadblock all my legislation.
But if you'd included the public option, maybe more voters would have come out for the 2010 midterms, and you'd have had a Democratic Congress instead of losing it.
Oh, I see what you're saying.
If I follow through with the public option, I'd have a Democratic Congress and the power to do shit.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
But I couldn't do that.
Why not?
Because the next time Republicans take Congress, they might do the same thing.
Maybe not if you actually helped voters.
Oh, I see what you're saying.
Help voters, and they'll back you and your party.
Yeah.
But I couldn't do that.
Why not?
I'm so fucking rich, I don't know anymore.
Maybe I'll write about it in my next book, The Power of Nothing.
Hey, who do you think Camela is going to pick for her running mate in 2024?
I'm putting my hopes on Tom Cotton.
So Kabala.
Can I call her Kabalu?
You can call her Kamala.
Oh, Jesus.
Let's put more poor people in prison.
All right.
So Kamala Harris went on 60 minutes, and it was a gas.
She laughed at nothing.
She ran away from real issues and she gaslighted.
So let's watch.
You're very different in the policies that you've supported in the past.
You're considered the most liberal United States senator.
And what does that tell you?
What does that tell you?
She's the most liberal United States senator, a tool of Wall Street, and a cop who had to be sued to let people out of prison.
Somebody said that, and it actually was Mike Pence on the debate stage.
Yeah.
Well, actually, the non-partisan.
She's just laughing.
Again, she just cackles for absolutely no reason whatsoever.
And GovTrack has rated you as the most liberal senator.
You supported the Green New Deal.
You supported Medicare for all.
You've supported legalizing marijuana.
Joe Biden doesn't support those things.
So are you going to bring the policies, those progressive policies that you supported as senator, into a Biden administration?
Oh, so what this news person is saying is you and Joe Biden are really different.
I mean, he wrote the crime bill.
You implemented it.
See how different you guys are?
I thought the fake controversy.
Yes, and I also thought the reason why she had to tell Kamala all the things that she was progressive on, otherwise Kamala couldn't come up with a list anyways.
Right.
You're right.
You're right.
You're the most progressive in it.
Unbelievable.
You're considered the most liberal United States senator.
They didn't include low-level drug offenders in that assessment, I bet.
I got a question.
I'll be honest, when she, okay, well, let's go.
Let's keep going.
What I will do, and I promise you this, and this is what Joe wants me to do.
This was part of our deal.
I will always share with him my lived experience as it relates to any issue that we confront.
I will relate my lived experience.
That's the new buzzword.
My lived experience.
That's the new buzzword or term.
You know who else has a lived experience, Kamala?
I know a guy who has a lived experience of having Steve Mnuchin steal his house from him illegally, and then you not prosecuting him because you're a tool of Wall Street.
What about that lived experience?
Is that the lived experience you're going to tell Joe about?
How to screw over fucking homeowners and old people in favor of the banks?
Is that your live?
Because that's your real lived experience.
Your lived experience of growing up privileged.
And I promised Joe that I will give him that perspective and always be honest with him.
And is that a socialist or progressive perspective?
No.
No, it is the perspective of a woman who grew up a black child in America who was on.
I'll be honest.
When she compared her to a socialist, I laughed pretty hard too.
That's pretty.
So that's a solid laugh.
So a prosecutor who also has a mother who arrived here at the age of 19 from India who also, you know, likes hip-hop.
What do you want to know?
I want to give you the opportunity.
I don't know what she's laughing about, but she likes hip-hop so much she can travel in the future to hear stuff that hasn't been released yet.
Did you know that?
*laughter*
What do you want to know?
Need to address this.
Okay, ready?
Here's what Aisha says.
She says, I can't get over the fact that when asked whether she'd push Biden to adopt Medicare for All or a Green New Deal, Kamala Harris laughed hysterically and said no.
She would be bringing her lived experience as a black woman who likes hip-hop.
What an exchange to define the times.
I'm surprised she didn't show us her cool shoes.
I'm co-sponsoring Bernie Sanders' Medicare for All bill because healthcare is a right.
Add your name if you agree.
Remember when she did that?
Not doing that.
But here she is trying to win an Emmy.
Watch this.
Believe, and it's personal.
And I was actually very, it was hurtful to hear you talk about the reputations of two United States senators who built their reputations and career on the segregation of race in this country.
And it was not only that, but you also worked with them to oppose busing.
And, you know, there was a little girl in California who was part of the second class to integrate her public schools.
And she was bussed to school every day.
And that little girl was me.
So I will tell you that on this subject, it can.
There we go.
Do you agree today?
Do you agree today that you were wrong to oppose busing in America?
Do you agree?
I did not oppose busing in America.
What I opposed is busing ordered by the Department of Education.
That's what I opposed.
Well, there's not a failure of.
So that's her trying to get an Emmy.
And then she goes here and says.
Because in those debates, you landed haymakers on Joe Biden.
I mean, they were, his teeth were like chiclets all over the stage.
And now I believe you that you're fully supportive of him.
How does that transition happen?
How do you go from being such a passionate opponent on such bedrock principles for you?
And now you guys seem to be pals.
It was a debate.
Not everybody landed punches like you did, though.
It was a debate.
It was a debate.
Come on.
I don't actually care about that stuff.
That's just shit I was saying to try to score points at a debate.
That's what she's saying.
Come on, I don't care about that shit.
That bussing shit.
I mean it.
It was a debate.
That the whole reason, literally, it was a debate.
It was called a debate.
I understand.
Travel to the debate.
There were journalists there covering the debate.
you Thank you.
You know, at debates, everybody just lies and stuff and doesn't say things they mean, you know, whatever.
They just throw a lot of shit on the wall and seize what sticks.
And that stuck.
It's like she's a psychopath almost.
It's a debate.
Debate.
You're a journalist.
It was a debate.
It was called a debate.
Debate.
Oh, I got.
She found a way to get out of that question.
That's what she thinks.
She's just going to, that's what they do.
She just keeps laughing and laughing.
Maybe she's right.
It was literally a debate.
Literally.
Just literally a debate.
Where there would be a debate.
Jesus.
I should have been an actress.
Here's some more.
I would not be standing here were it not for the education I received.
And I know many of us will say the same thing.
And I believe a child going without an education is tantamount to a crime.
So I decided I was going to start prosecuting parents for truancy.
Well, this was a little controversial in San Francisco.
I'm going to put the poorest people in jail for truancy.
Isn't that funny?
Ha ha.
I'm not going to help people.
And frankly, my staff went bananas.
They were very concerned because we didn't know at the time whether I was going to have an opponent in my reelection race.
But I said, look, I'm done.
I mean, God, I'm doing some horribly draconian shit to the poorest, most vulnerable people in society.
And I'm fucking bringing down the hammer of the government on them as hard as possible.
And I don't give a fuck.
And my staff was like, hey, I don't care.
I'm fucking dead inside.
This is a serious issue, and I've got a little political capital.
Hey, education's important.
Here's an even more horrible idea, though.
I'm going to spend some of it.
And this is what we did.
We recognized that in that initiative, as a prosecutor in law enforcement, I have a huge stick.
The school district has got a carrot.
Let's work in tandem around our collective objective and goal, which is to get those kids in school.
So, to that end, on my letterhead, now let me tell you something about my letterhead.
When you're the DA of a major city in this country, usually the job comes with a badge.
And there is often an artistic rendering of said badge on your stationary.
So I sent a letter out on my letterhead to every parent in the school district outlining the connection that was statistically proven between elementary school truancy, high school dropouts, who will become a victim of crime, and who will become a perpetrator of crime.
We sent it out to everyone.
A friend of mine actually called me and he said, Kamala, my wife got the letter.
She freaked out.
She brought all the kids into the living room, held up the letter, said, if you don't go to school, Kamala's going to put you and me in jail.
Isn't that funny?
Yes, we achieved intended effect.
Isn't that funny?
Poor people aren't scared to death enough.
Poor minority people aren't scared enough.
We got to scare you.
Now, there's another way we're going to put you in jail.
Get you in the system.
Prison stocks went up right after Kamala Harris was confirmed as vice president.
That's who Kamala Harris is actually going to do socialism for.
The for-profit prison industry, like she always has.
That's why she's giggling about locking people up.
That's why she had to be sued by the federal government to have her release prisons, prisoners in California that she would not release.
Hey, Kamala Harris has to answer for not prosecuting Steve Mnuchin.
She likes prosecuting truants, but she will prosecute Wall Street criminals.
Isn't that interesting?
She goes, well, I didn't prosecute him because his kids weren't late for school.
His kids went to school, so I don't understand what I'm supposed to do with that.
How Kamala Harris fought to keep nonviolent prisoners locked up.
As California Attorney General, she spent years subverting the 2011 Supreme Court ruling requiring the state to reduce its prison population.
The overseeing judicial panel nearly found the state in contempt of court.
One wrote the crime bill.
The other enforced it.
Authoritarian establishment ticket all the way.
Nothing will fundamentally change.
Build more schools, not jails.
Just joking.
Build more jails, is what Kamala Harris says.
She's just joking.
So there she was on 60 Minutes.
That's who she is.
That's what you're getting.
You're getting two unbelievable right-wing authoritarians in lefty clothing.
They're not.
They're unbelievable right-wing.
Things are going to get way worse when Joe Biden is president.
So I know all the blue check assholes are going to go back to sleep.
Andy Richter will be happy as the city he lives in turns into fucking Brazil.
He'll be happy, though, because Trump won't be on TV.
And then he can go to parties and act like a good person.
Even though those people will never use their platforms to lampoon the cause of Donald Trump.
They'll only lampoon Donald Trump.
And that's why most comedians, most comedy sucks right now.
Those late-night shows are fucking garbage.
Garbage.
Stephen Colbert did one of probably maybe the best comedy show in the history of political comedy, the Colbert Report.
The show he's doing on CBS is the exact he turned into the character he was making fun of.
That's how bad it is, his show.
His show is horrible.
You see a lot of people's shows go horrible under Donald Trump.
Wasn't that amazing?
News shows, a lot of lefty news shows turn into garbage because of Donald Trump.
They turn into conspiracy theorists.
They turn into people who repeat CIA talking points uncritically.
They turn into people who shame journalists who get it right because of Donald Trump.
That happened.
That happened to YouTube lefties.
That didn't happen to just fucking assholes at CNN.
And to this day, those people still do it.
And now you wonder why everybody's being censored under the idea that it's Russia?
Because the leftism is pushing Russia Gate.
The left is propping up the intelligence community.
Their left props up the surveillance state.
And if you think when you vote for Ilhan Omar or fucking AOC that they're against the surveillance state, you're wrong.
They all voted for it.
They all voted for it.
None of them voted against it.
As Norman Solomon pointed out last October, what's the point of voting for progressives if they're just going to vote in favor of the secure surveillance state anyway?
There is no point.
Hey, Joe Biden's calling me again.
Hello?
Hey, man, stop calling me.
And if you ain't voting for me, you must be black.
Here's the thing: the United States of America needs a change.
A change to normalcy.
A change we can believe in again, man.
Build to the back to the better, buddy boy.
Now's the time we be stand up and counting.
No looking back.
Those teams are gone, Mr. Tambourine Man.
Jesus Christ.
The new days are here.
The old days are there.
You know what I mean?
Jesus.
Not really.
Sometimes you just slur your words and mix things up, and it really scares me, Joe.
Give me a break, Porky.
What?
Yeah, fuck you, Porky.
Next question.
I really don't have one now.
You're scaring me.
Stop it.
Anything happens to me, President Harris could take over.
I love her creepy laugh.
Perfect for Halloween.
Are you sure you're up to the stress of the job, Joe?
Will you shut up, man?
Been practicing addiction with tongue twisties all week long.
Have you seen this one?
She sells, she sells seashores and rubbed her rubber baby buggy bumps by the shells of the lake.
I don't remember that would go that way.
I don't think that's how it goes.
You're crazy.
Ask me if I can do this one.
I saw Susie sitting in a shoe shine shop.
Okay, say it.
I saw shitty shitting shit shine in a shit ship.
Shop.
Next.
No, that's not it at all.
Come on, man.
This is that classic disinformation America's been hearing all about.
What if I ask you how could a clam cram in a clean cream can?
Jesus Christ.
Jesus.
I don't want to do tug twisters with you, Joe.
Me neither, believe me.
No, seriously.
I've always wondered how a clam can do that.
Why won't anyone tell Joe, for God's sake?
What's the motivation here?
Putin.
Hey, how do you feel about Republicans labeling you a socialist radical?
Shitty, orange are glad Bernie isn't running.
I beat the living crap out of that Bolshevik.
So much misinformation going around, Jack.
Let me be clear.
Joe Biden must not allow medical for all.
He will not ban fracking.
And he does not support the Cream New Deal.
Clean new seal.
You said cream new deal.
Okay, whatever.
The clean new veal.
Look, we're on a freight train to hell, and I'm the crazy old fuckhead at the controls.
Forget about shape for now, because Trump is going to not save the world faster.
Yeah.
Got a clear choice, November 3rd.
Don't forget, Trump can still win because of how he plays.
What do you mean by how he plays?
He could pull a fast one by not killing another 10,000 people the next week.
It might only be 5,000.
Do you see what I mean?
That's a clear difference.
5,000 people, I get it.
Another thing, another thing.
I'll tell you what I told that Leslie Stool gal over at 16 minutes.
No new taxes for the under 400,000ers.
Read my nips.
Can you see them?
Read my nips.
Don't like my life dependent on it.
Because to tell you the truth, this is the only thing keeping me going.
And number two, will you shut up, man?
Read my nips.
Yeah.
I don't know if you've noticed what's happened recently is that George Orwell was unbelievably accurate in his prediction.
Not only are people embracing censorship, but censorship's coming from the left.
Censorship of accurate information is coming from the left as the left embraces evidence-free conspiracy theories at the same time.
So they're censoring accurate information, meaning the story about Hunter Biden's emails, which is 100% accurate.
That gets censored.
But the evidence-free conspiracy theories about it, like it's Russia, it's a Russian psyops.
That's completely bogus.
That's a conspiracy theory with no evidence.
Yet that gets tweeted out, gets reported ad nauseum.
Isn't that interesting?
The facts get censored.
The conspiracy theory with no evidence gets so a lie makes its way halfway around the world before the truth gets its pants on.
And that's what's happening right now again.
So watch this.
Right now, a lot of U.S. liberals and progressives are swatting aside the Biden family corruption stuff as basically nothing compared to Trump.
And it looks like they will succeed.
If he does win, however, it is not going to go away and it will not look like nothing.
Which this is shocking.
I mean, corporate journalists usually never swat things aside.
Well, except for the climate crisis, Flint's water, Dapple, police brutality, all nine of our wars, protests, wildcat strikes, public opinion, net neutrality, our predatory healthcare systems, our predatory prison system, our predatory student loan system, our predatory housing system.
Other than that, though, the journalists in this country are on it.
Here's Glenn Greenwald.
It's totally legitimate for liberal activists, Democratic partisans, and ordinary Biden supporters to try to ignore or dismiss the reporting and attack those who discuss it.
That's their role.
So you would expect people who are supporters of Biden to try to do damage control for him.
You would expect that.
But then Glenn says it's utterly shameful for journalists to do this, and they're the ones leading the way.
Yes, it is.
Yes, it is.
Here's Lee Fong says: the class divide has never been so apparent in the media.
Many journalists grew up rich, went to $20,000 a year prep schools, are obsessed with fights over vocabulary, symbols, fringe boogeymen, ignore crumbling public schools, unsafe streets, rampant poverty as secondary concerns.
So, you know, most journalists, they really have their thumb on the pulse of regular people in America.
A study found that there were a higher proportion of graduates at elite schools among reporters and editors at the Wall Street Journal, The New Republic, and the New York Times than in the U.S. Senate or among Fortune 500 CEOs.
So that's education for the elite, right?
That's a very elite, educated group of people.
Reserving education for the elite is literally one of the pillars of fascism.
But if enough people can't go to school, nobody will know that.
Clever play, ruling class.
Clever play.
Amazon CIA $600 million deals facing scrutiny.
What's the CIA doing on Amazon Cloud?
Hey, even the CIA can't resist the sweet, sweet deal of free two-day shipping with Amazon Prime.
Am I right?
Jeff Bezos is doing huge business with the CIA while keeping his Washington Post readers in the dark.
Because democracy dies in darkness and he's happy to help.
Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos joins Tech Titans on Pentagon's Innovation Advisory Board.
I call this art piece douchebag and the rocket we wish he would take on a one-way trip.
Oh boy.
Nailed that.
This is the guy who runs the Washington Post, okay?
This is why journalism sucks in America.
Amazon considering suing over a loss of $10 billion Pentagon contract after Trump attacks on Bezos.
So there's a bad guy suing other bad guys over shit having to do with another bad guy.
You don't need to root for anyone in this situation, folks.
During the pandemic, Jeff Bezos became $78 billion richer while denying paid sick leave and hazard pay to over 450,000 Amazon workers.
20,000 of them got COVID.
Wow.
Pro-war movement springs into action.
That's from February 20, 2003.
This is why this is journalism in America.
This is in 2003.
Pro-war movement springs into action.
The pro-war movement.
What's their slogan?
War.
This time it won't be bullshit.
We promise.
So this is there was a pro-war movement.
Even on colleges, Students for War is an ad hoc committee recently set up to build support across America for military action.
Not to mention they have a psychotic hazing ritual.
Northwestern University Jr.
Dave Weigel, also editor-in-chief of the campus weekly Northwestern Chronicle, organized a group of about 25 people over email to counter an anti-war protest on campus last week.
Now, who the hell would want to be in a group called Students for War?
Star reporter for the Washington Post, Dave Weigel.
That's who.
That's who.
Dave Weigel wants to oppose the anti-war protests, what he calls an anti-American movement, the effect of not letting the media treat it like a burgeoning war, anti-war movement.
If there is no pro-America presence whatsoever, it is very easy for American reporters to just toe the anti-American line.
Man, he's really looking out for the little guy.
Who's going to speak up for the poor weapons industry?
Dave Weigel from the Washington Post.
Hey, did you organize pro-war rallies when you were the editor of your school newspaper in college?
Yes.
Then you could get a job at the Washington Post.
Because his boss sits on the board of the Pentagon.
His boss is a $600 million deal with the CIA.
That's awesome.
It is funny that he has a BS in journalism.
So here's what I say to a guy like Dave Weigel and his 70s porno mustache.
What I say to a guy like Dave Weigel, if you love war so much that you're going to go organize pro-war rallies while you're in college, shouldn't you just have went to the war and fought it yourself?
Yes, you should have.
That's what a man would do.
But Dave Weigel is not a man.
Dave Weigel is a willing tool of the establishment who is pro-war.
He was a right-winged Republican up until Donald Trump.
So now he's a good guy.
That's who he is.
And why do I bring it up?
Because he's coming for real lefties.
Here's Dave Weigel.
He's coming after that Ryan Knight.
He says, Ryan Knight is changing his handle from proud resistor to proud socialist.
Told the story of Klout Chase here.
So here, you know Ryan Knight.
Ryan Knight is a guy who used to be an Elizabeth Warren supporter and said shitty things about Julian Assault.
He was a regular centrist Democrat, and then he finally woke up.
So he finally woke up.
He had an evolution politically because he saw what was happening.
And guys like Dave Weigel, pro-war, rally Dave Weigel, who wants to counter journalists because they're too anti-American, comes after him.
So Ryan Knight says, or maybe I just finally woke up and saw that both corporate parties use our government to enrich themselves and their corporate donors, and we the people are paying the price.
He goes, yeah, I get that.
You want people to argue with you online.
It's just more interesting to argue with people.
Isn't it funny that this guy came out of nowhere to start a fight with a guy he says he wants to argue?
Dave Weigel, completely out of nowhere, attacks a guy and says, I get you want to argue with people online.
This is why.
So when Dave Weigel sent me an email the first time he did an article on me, there were three obvious lies in his email.
So I didn't return it because I knew he was a piece of shit.
And then when he came up to me at a Bernie rally and said, hey, how come you didn't return my email?
Because you're full of shit.
That's why.
And I know you are.
I don't want to talk to you.
You're full of shit.
So here he is.
He starts a picks-up fight with a guy, just a regular person.
So he's punching down and punching left.
Of course, Mr. Pro-War Rally, who works for billionaire Jeff Bezos, who's in bed with the Pentagon.
Of course, that's how this works.
You work for Jeff Bezos in the Washington Post, and you decided to join the Blue MAGA cult and piling on anyone who dares to vote outside the corrupt two-party system.
Get bent.
Well said.
By the way, just so you know what kind of a piece of shit Dave Weigel really is, and all these people are.
The Amazon Washington Post has a contract with $600 million with the CIA.
That's a fact.
So our friend Rush Lewis tweeted about it.
And he said, he links to hangthebankers.com.
He says, Washington Post made a $600 million deal with the CIA, and this guy is telling us we shouldn't believe him.
We should believe him.
We should believe.
Right.
This guy's saying we should believe him, meaning we should believe Jeff Bezos.
And his comeback to that is so he denies it.
And he says, well, I can hardly brush aside the reporting of hangthebankers.com.
So what he's trying to say is that this isn't accurate.
So what he's trying to say is that is not accurate.
That's Dave Weigel saying that this reporting is not accurate because somebody said it from hangthebankers.com.
So when he comes back with a different source, he says, here you go, Mr. Professional Reporter that apparently knows nothing about his own newspaper.
So when it's irrefutable, now Dave Weigel goes, that's Bezos, not the Washington Post.
Now go away.
So at first he lies.
This is their star reporter, pro-war star reporter, who's now attacking lefties.
Again, he always does, but here he is doing it again.
He always shit on Bernie supporters, and here he is doing it again on the lefty.
And here, when he gets caught lying, he was flat out lying for Jeff Bezos.
He gets caught by a regular person, and then they bring back another source for him.
And then he, all right, you caught me lying, and now I'll just pretend like it's not important.
No, you just got outed as a liar because Dave Weigel is a liar.
He's a shitty right-wing on-purpose tool who gets orders from his bosses on how to smear people.
So he was told to go after Ryan Knight, and he did.
Dave Weigel was told to go after Ryan Knight.
That's why he did it.
Dave Weigel was told to go after me.
That's why he did it.
Dave Weigel takes orders from Jeff Bezos or the people Jeff Bezos hires.
But I love his mustache.
So Ted Cruz just finished his event.
We just saw Dave Weigel, the reporter for the Washington Post, come by with his fake mustache on again.
I don't know why you show him.
He's right behind you.
Turn him, just turn around.
So that's Dave Weigel from the Washington Post and his fake mustache.
It's funny.
That's why he does it.
And I appreciate it.
I like comedy.
And now you know why journalism sucks in America.
Because it's owned by billionaires who are sitting on Pentagon boards and are in bed with the CIA.
And then they hire pukes like Dave Weigel, who did pro-war rallies in college and then smears anybody to the left of Jeff Bezos.
That's why American journalism sucks.
There you go.
Hey, this is Jimmy.
Who's this?
Jimmy, Sean Pacito.
Hell, hey, Mr. Pacito, how are you?
Not doing half bad.
Hey, look, I want to talk to you about something.
You want me to explain politics to you again?
No, not politics.
Jimmy, listen.
You know what?
When I call you, I expect you to level with me.
Now yank my chain.
Hey, you know there's a lot more to that phone call, but we don't have time in today's podcast.
How do you hear the entire phone call?
You got to become a premium member.
Go to JimmyDorkComedy.com, sign up.
It's the most affordable premium program in the business.
Today's show is written by Ron Placone, Mark Van Landuit, Steph Zamarano, Jim Earl, Mike McRae, and Roger Rittenhouse.
All the voices performed today by the one and the only of the inimitable, Mike McRae, who can be found at mikemcray.com.
That's it for this week.
You be the best you can be, and I'll keep being me.
Don't freak out!
I'm not kidding.
Don't freak out!
Don't freak out.
You got, you got it.
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