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Oct. 24, 2019 - Jimmy Dore Show
01:02:50
20191024_TJDS_20191024_Podcast
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Get ready for an outstanding entertainment program.
The Jimmy Dore Show.
No, Harrison Ford's calling me again.
Hello.
Hey, Door.
Climate change is real.
Did you know that?
Yes, of course.
I mean, I thought it was real, too, but I never thought it was real real.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, yeah.
It's real.
All of it.
Well, what did you think it was?
A bad buzz.
But it's not.
It's real.
But I thought you knew it was real all along.
Found out it was real.
Callista told me.
She told me young people are angry and they should lead on climate change.
I agree.
So get the hell out of their way.
I will.
But first, get the hell off my plane.
Where are you right now?
Where are you right now?
On my plane.
We can't keep Bernie from the consequences of our actions like a fugitive.
Where's the runway?
Over.
I agree.
When I came home, there was a man in my house.
I fucked with this man.
He had a mechanical arm.
Hey, Jimmy, do you happen to know why they put do not eat on those silica packs I smoke every day?
Because some people eat.
Jimmy, in order to stop the worst effects of climate change, we must act now.
I agree.
What are you doing?
According to Variety, I'm acting in the Indiana Jones robot movie.
Don't you mean the Indiana Jones reboot movie?
I know what I read, Jimmy.
It says robot.
We should all do that.
Because if we were all in the Indiana Jones robot movie, there wouldn't be any problems.
Because we'd all be robots.
Speaking of robots, Helen Marin says I'm a bad kisser.
Request assistance over.
I'm sorry I can't help you with that, Harrison.
Okay, but no robots in my trailer, please.
Because it's my trailer.
I have to go now.
And tell the attending physician, this man has a puncture in the epigastric area.
That is a reference to the fugitive.
Good thing he's high.
Establishment media sets of August fighting.
So good luck, bullshit we can't afford.
Fomenting this.
Watch and see as the jet go from medium speeds and jumps the medium and hits them head on.
It's the Chimitor Show.
Oh.
Hi, everybody.
Welcome to this week's Jimmy Door show.
We'll see you November 3rd at the Sycamore Tavern in Hollywood, November 5th in Buffalo, November 18th in Philly.
Go to jimmydoorcomedy.com for league for all our live shows.
Now, let's get to the jokes before we get to the jokes, shall we?
You know, I simply can't believe Donald Trump tweeted that he thought the impeachment inquiry was a lynching, primarily because he spelled it right.
Boy, I don't know about you.
Well, I know what you're doing for Halloween.
I know what I'm doing.
I'm going to watch MSNBC, right?
That's what I'm going to do, right?
Because it's inhabited by spooks.
That's for sure.
Yeah.
Hey, did you see the CNN headline from Chris Eliza?
Chris Eliza literally says Democrats now have a real chance at winning the Senate in 2020.
So you know what that means?
Democrats are going to lose more seats in the Senate.
Some top Republicans are upset with Trump over his lynching tweet because they think it makes lynching look bad.
Bernie Sanders came out against the Espionage Act that's used against whistleblowers.
Yeah, and that's a good thing.
Little does he know, Liz Warren already has a plan on how to avoid talking about that.
That's right.
Hey, did you hear Andrew Yang said he's now open to being Joe Biden's vice president?
Does he know how many IT calls that's going to involve?
Andrew, it's Joe again.
I know it's 2 a.m.
Do you know what my Netflix password is?
Did you know that Pete Buddha and Mark Zuckerberg have mutual college friends?
Yeah, yeah.
I wonder if Deep State Dude Bros was the first Facebook group.
Hey, did you see that video of that high school coach who took a gun from a suicidal student and then hugged him?
Did you see that?
Yeah.
And then the school, the school praised him for his courage and bravery, and then they had to fire him for hugging that student.
Did you hear Mark Zuckerberg responded to Bernie Sanders' call to abolish billionaires by saying it would harm much-needed philanthropy?
But I always thought billionaires were billionaires' biggest philanthropy.
Am I right?
Come on.
Did you hear Pete Buddhajigs also just hired a foreman Goldman Sachs executive as his national policy director?
True story.
That is so 2008 Obama of him, isn't it?
Hey, what's coming up on today's show?
Hillary Clinton overreaches and everyone's a Russian and Tulsi drops the hammer on the queen of warmongers.
Plus, we take a look at CNN, who they're defending, Tulsi or Hillary.
Plus, Twitter editor is exposed as being British military psyops officer, the Twitter editor in charge of the entire Middle East.
And CBS asks Tulsi with a straight face, what is a regime change war?
Plus, we got phone calls today from Hillary supporter, Sherrod Brown or Sherrod, plus Mitt Romney and Harrison Ford, plus a lot lot more.
That's today on the Jimmy Dore show.
I'm a serious person, but I'm also a fun person.
I'm a fun person.
I'm fun.
I'm fun.
You know, when me and my husband ride in Jeffrey Epstein's plane, it's fucking fun.
Just fun.
You know, I think the hallmark of a fun person is they tell people how much fun they are.
Oh, always.
It's like somebody goes, I'm crazy.
You know, that's the most boring, deadweight motherfucker you're ever going to meet in your life.
I love different colored balls.
So here's something fun she did.
She went on a podcast and said this about Tulsi Gabbard.
Here you go.
I'm not making any predictions, but I think they've got their eye on somebody who's currently in the Democratic primary and are grooming her to be the third-party candidate.
She's a favorite of the Russians.
They have a bunch of sites and bots and other ways of supporting her so far.
And that's assuming Jill Stein will give it up, which she might not because she's also a Russian.
Couldn't you find someone with less money and less power than Jill Stein?
By the way, Jill Stein, not even running this time.
She's not running.
She's not in.
That's how dumb they are.
They even pick someone who's going to run this time.
Jill Stein, not running.
Okay.
And Hillary Clinton, she's like a cold that just won't go away, right?
It just never fully goes away.
He's always like, oh, that's true.
Hillary Clinton is so good at being unlikable.
If Andy Kaufman was alive, he'd be taking notes from her right now.
You know what, Jimmy?
This isn't about politics or national security or Russia.
This is about Tulsi Gabbard pulling off wearing a pants suit and looking hot.
Yes.
Hillary Clinton, she can't fathom the fact that there's a chance another woman is going to be the first president.
She cannot fucking handle that.
And she is a sociopath and she's just like, I will do whatever it takes.
I actually think this is a golden moment because she cannot control herself.
She cannot.
And I think this and the combination of Tulsi finally saying, fuck this, and dropping the gloves of AOC backing Bernie, it blows up all of their identity politic bullshit.
It fucking blows it through the roof.
And when Bernie gets, if he gets the nomination and wins, all of their shit, all of their corrupt bullshit goes right down the fucking toilet and it's magical.
I'm excited for it.
Well, if, well, you know, if Bernie wins, it's going to be largely thanks to the Russians.
Yes.
And Jill Stein, the powerful Green Party with its $5 that it's got saved up in a fucking hemp bank.
Somewhere else on Lucky Stripe in this turn.
Says Jill Stein.
I want it all on Lucky Stripe.
Why?
Another horse died at Santa Nita?
Fuck.
Okay, so just a fact, huh?
Tulsi Gabbard's a Russian asset and Jill Stein's a Russian asset.
Alfred Al Van Jones hosted the band.
That's it.
So now even CNN sees through their, oh, I guess there's an asset.
That's how bad people are seeing through this.
So it's like, okay, we were with you with Trump, but now everybody like, I'll go along with Trump because he's a douchebag.
But no, everybody.
And believe me, the next one, and what I said was: by smearing and redbaiting a soldier currently serving as a medic in the illegal wars she voted for and helped engineer, Hillary Clinton has erased any doubt that she is just as despicable as George W. Bush or Donald Trump could ever be.
She is a cancer on America.
And do you remember when Trump was attacking that Gold Star family during the campaign and everybody was like, oh my God, he's thinking about a veteran gold?
They don't give a shit.
She's not even, Tulsi's not dead yet.
She's still currently serving and you don't give a shit.
You smear and red bait her.
So fuck you.
You don't give a shit about the military.
You only care when it lines up with your political position.
Like a true hypocrite and a sociopath.
They don't give.
It's so amazing how they, oh my God.
So that's why, when you wonder, why do people still vote for Trump?
Because they know people like Hillary Clinton and Debbie Wasserman Schultz and Bill Clinton and the Democratic Party are just as full of shit as Trump could ever fucking be.
That's why.
The other thing they just handed.
So if Bernie, my suspicion is Bernie and Tulsi made a deal in January and he said, look, you're going to be my VP.
He's going to get, if he gets a nomination, he's the VP.
They're going to tour around the country.
And Hillary just, can you imagine Tulsi and all these red states going, I'm a fucking vet just like you and all your kids because there's no goddamn jobs in these red states.
That's why your sons and daughters had to go join the war and this rich fucking white lady's talking shit about me.
It's a fucking, she just handed them the guy.
It's so great.
I'm like, keep talking, Hillary.
Keep saying you're crazy, rich white lady, warmongering, sociopathic, fucking pedophile bullshit.
But other than that, they do good work.
They do good work.
I think Hillary just feels right at home accusing a woman of color of crime.
Yeah.
So here, Michael Tracy says, since Tulsi is a major in the National Guard, shouldn't Hillary lead an investigation to determine the full extent of Russian infiltration of the U.S. military?
Because that sounds very dangerous.
Or maybe Robert Mueller could do it.
Yeah, so what Hillary is implying is that we have infiltrators who the rank of major in the army.
How does the army, you know what?
Tulsi Gabbard also has the highest security clearance you could have in our government.
She has that.
Tulsi actually responded.
Tulsi said, did you see this?
She goes, great.
Thank you, Hillary Clinton.
You, the queen of warmongers, embodiment of corruption, and the personification of the rot that has sickened the Democratic Party for so long, have finally come out from behind the curtain.
Ah, someone's not holding their powder.
I'll tell you that.
Boy.
And by the way, I love how Queen of Warmongers was trending on Twitter.
It was fantastic.
She goes, she says, from the day I announced my candidacy, there has been a concerted campaign to destroy my reputation.
We wondered who was behind it and why.
And now we know it was always you through your proxies and powerful allies in the corporate media and war machine, afraid of the threat that I pose.
It's now clear that this primary is between you and me.
Don't cowardly hide behind your proxies.
Join the race directly.
applause Thank you.
Thank you.
And Hillary said, she said this.
Okay, there you go.
Hey, I just want to remind Hillary, where were you in 2005?
Because Tulsi was serving in that Iraq war that you voted for.
You are hanging out with the trunks.
Woo!
Just so you know.
And somebody said, hey, Jimmy, don't attack Hillary like that.
She may not be a soldier, but she saw action when those snipers she made up shot at her.
Remember that?
So that was said tongue-in-cheek.
Yes, that was said.
By the way, I just want to show, look at Tulsi.
188,000 likes and 54,000 retweets.
Looks like that's a lot of lies.
You know who liked those tweets?
All the people of Iraq, all the people of Libya, the people of Honduras, the people of Syria, the people of Haiti, the people of Yemen, anywhere else Hillary Clinton had anything to do with what was happening in the world.
All those people probably liked that tweet because they know what a destructive fucking maniac she's been over her career.
Yeah, by the way, coincidentally, Queen of Warmongers, that's a children's book that Chelsea Clinton's writing right now.
This is the Tulsi we all have been kind of hoping for.
When Tulsi took Kamala out two debates ago, I was like, more of this, Tulsi.
Stop fucking playing nice and being like, and now it's like finally she's like, all right, bitch, you want to fucking go?
You know, while you were fleecing money in Haiti, motherfucker, I was in the shit, so I'm going to take you out.
I'm just, this is fantastic.
I want to see just go in 2020.
Hunter Biden and Chelsea Clinton are going on a spawn of people who lost a Trump book tour.
I don't know if you know that.
All right, so let's watch that again because that's funny how she, but you know how, so Tulsi said, since the beginning, since I announced, there's been a concerted effort, a coordinated campaign to trash her.
So the day she announced, I don't know if you remember the day she announced for president, NBC News ran this story.
The Russian propaganda machine that tried to influence the 2016 U.S. election is now promoting the presidential aspirations of 2020 Democratic candidate Tulsi Gabbard.
And so you know where they got this information from?
They got this information from that company called New Knowledge, which we explained to you on our show before, is completely discredited.
Everybody was getting their information about Russian bots from a company called New Knowledge.
New Knowledge was discovered to be inventing fake Russian bots and attributing them to Republican politicians.
So they got caught.
They were doing it so much, the chairman of New Knowledge got his Facebook page blocked.
That's how bad he was at pushing propaganda and fake bots.
But NBC News uses new knowledge.
They've already been discredited by this time, by the way.
And they use them to launch this.
And here, Katrina Vandenhoe of the nation says, what you think of Tulsi Gabbard isn't the point.
What matters is we're witnessing influential media outlets equating dissenting foreign policy thinking with the Kremlin, essentially stigmatizing anyone who thinks differently.
Yes, and why would NBC News?
By the way, here's from NBC News analysts at New Knowledge, the company the Senate Intelligence Committee used to track Russian activities in the 2016 election, told NBC News they spotted chatter related to Gabbard in anonymous online message boards, including those known for fomenting right-wing troll campaigns.
This is from The Intercept.
NBC News, to smear Gabbard as a Kremlin favorite, relied on a group that is heralded as experts without telling its audience about the major fraud which this firm just got caught perpetrating.
So do you understand when Trump says fake news that half the country lands because most of the time it is fucking fake news?
Everything they said about Russia Gate actually was fake news.
This shit they're saying about Tulsi Gabbard is fake news.
Everything they've ever said about Syria, Libya, Iraq, Honduras, fucking Venezuela is fake news.
Only the corporate media could make Trump out to be a fucking truth teller.
That's how bad they are.
Did NBD, did NBC News respond to any of this?
No, they've never responded to any of this.
No, they don't have to respond.
And Glenn Greenwald said, LOL, several experts, they mean a firm that just got caught fabricating Russian bots on behalf of a Democrat so severely that they got banned from Facebook.
And here's the guy, Jonathan Morgan.
By the way, what did he do before he did that job?
He was a special advisor to the State Department.
So he's a fucking spook working inside the State Department.
Now he's going to save us from Russian bots.
And what he's actually doing is inventing them so he's running a grift.
That's what that's called.
Oh, I'm going to save you from Russian bots.
I didn't know there were Russian bots.
Oh, I found them.
That's what this is.
And NBC News repeats it, right?
And so Facebook suspended the account of Jonathan Morgan, the chief executive at a top social media research firm, after reports that he and others engaged in an operation to spread disinformation during a special election in Alabama last year.
So he was caught doing the exact thing.
He's claiming that, oh, there's Russian bot chatter boosting Tulsi Gabbard.
He's inventing those Russian bots.
And then NBC News reports them.
So, Jimmy, you're saying NBC is working with Hillary Clinton?
That seems like a big, that seems like a conspiracy theory, right?
Well, here's, I don't know if you remember, here's Ed Schultz to tell you that the head of NBC News, Andy Lack, was joined at the hip with the Hillary Clinton campaign, and they had him fired.
Watch.
Now, let me give you the opinion.
I think the Clintons were connected to Andy Lack, connected at the hip.
The head of NBC News, connected at the hip with the Clintons.
I think that they didn't want anybody in their prime time or anywhere in their lineup supporting Bernie Sanders.
I think that they were in the tank for Hillary Clinton, and I think it was managed.
And 45 days later, I was out at MSNBC.
Boom.
There you go.
And by the way, everybody making a big deal about Shep Smith got pushed out because of Clinton.
They fire people on the regular at MSNBC for Hillary Clinton.
Because of the war, they fired Phil Donahue and Jesse Ventura and Ashley Banfield.
They fired him just for covering Bernie Sanders.
They do that all the time.
So everybody making a big deal about Shep Smith getting pushed out because of Trump at Fox.
That's fucking par for the course.
Why are they acting like it only happens there?
It's been happening at MSNBC since they went on the fucking air.
That's why I'm here to point this shit out, I guess.
So that's why when Tulsi, thank you.
Thank you.
When Tulsi Gabbard says that they rigged the last election and the corporate media and the DNC are rigging this election, that's exactly what she means.
She means the corporate media is slandering her.
They're trying to ruin her reputation.
People like Hillary Clinton, the DNC, now they have all their minions repeating what Hillary Clinton said on television and in the press and on social media.
Just like she had them pop up on the Pied Piper theory, she's doing that with her minions in the press too.
They're all pushing these anti-Tul.
Could you believe that all the negative press Tulsi has gotten, she's polling at 2% and they can't stop fucking talking about her.
Why?
It's because they're allergic to the truth and she's the only one who's ever told the truth about our regime change wars.
No one has ever told the truth about that.
That we're funding terrorists.
She says it.
And that is why they've got to shut her down.
Just stop it!
Because they're allergic.
No matter where the truth comes from, that's why they come after me.
I'm a fucking dickhead in my garage at the Sycamore Tavern, and they got to stop me here because a little bit of truth getting out.
Nobody knows about their wars and what's really going on.
They can manage them through the media perfectly.
You see what's just happening with Syria.
You see with Venezuela.
You see with Libya, with Iraq.
You see it still happening.
So anyway, let me throw it to my panel.
Go ahead.
Anything?
Yeah, Dora's at the Sycamore Tavern.
Sir, yeah, Dora's at the Sycamore Tavern.
There's over 89 people there.
We gotta shut him down.
There's 89 people.
Nick Bronner says, Bravo, Hillary Clinton.
You've done something so detestable that has united people across ideological lines of contempt.
Media panels that routinely attacked Tulsi Gabbard are now defending her.
Watch, you want to see one?
Here's so Van Jones goes on with, doesn't matter who he's done with.
Some asshole.
Van Joan and this panel of fuck sticks on CNN reporting live.
Okay, so just a fact, huh?
Tulsi Gabbard's a Russian asset and Joel Stein's a Russian asset.
Alfred now Van Jones hosts to the Van Known show.
So that's how she puts it out there.
I mean, she's playing a very dangerous game.
I mean, Hillary Clinton.
First of all, Hillary Clinton is used to playing dangerous games.
Remember the dangerous game she played by getting Donald Trump to join the 2016 campaign?
You remember when they did that?
Four Trump allies and one Clinton associate, familiar with the exchange, said that Clinton encouraged Trump's efforts to play a larger role in the Republican Party and offered his own views of the political landscape.
Remember that?
That's a dangerous game.
She likes to play those dangerous games.
And then she told all her minions in the press to prop up Donald Trump at their Pied Piper theory so she could handpick the only person in the world that could beat her is Donald Trump.
So there we go.
So here we go.
If you're concerned about disinformation, if you're concerned, what the Russians do is they just spread disinformation, they get us divided against each other.
That is what just happened.
Just throw out some information, disinformation, smear somebody.
She is Hillary Clinton.
She's a legend.
She's got to be in the history books.
She's going to be in the history books as the person who lost the most winnable election in history.
That's what she's going to be in the history books for.
She's going to go out in the history books as a war-mongering fucking first lady.
That's what she's going to be going down in the history books for.
Yeah, okay.
Former nominee of our party, and she just came out against a sitting U.S. Congresswoman, a decorated war veteran, and somebody who's running for the nomination of our party with just a complete smear and no facts.
I called her Russian out there.
That's a fact.
And as you point out, sitting U.S. A fitting U.S. Congresswoman.
Now, this is not.
Waffles.
Someone said the secret word.
So a sitting Congresswoman.
Go ahead, Eddie.
Tell them what they've won.
They've won a beautiful trip to downtown LA.
Tent City.
So this is awesome to watch even Aaron Burnett and Van Jones sit there and go, what the fuck?
She can't do this to us.
So they finally stepped over.
Finally, there will be some.
So this is like the have you no dignity, sir.
Have you no.
That's that moment that's happening right now.
Hillary Clinton stepped over too far, a sitting congresswoman who's also got the highest clearance and is an active member.
She's a medic in the military.
So that finally, I think, hopefully this will be the unwinding of Russia game.
Maybe.
I don't know.
I've thought this before.
I thought the Mueller report would end it.
It didn't.
I thought it would stop many times before.
Maybe this will do it.
What do you guys think?
Actually, no, I do.
I think this is the turning point.
I mean, I know there's a lot of time left between now and November, but I really think this was like such a critical gaff because Tulsi's donation money has gone up, is my understanding.
She's trending better.
I mean, it's like all of these things, Hillary, and it's just the Clintons cannot help themselves.
No.
They wake up and lie 10 times before fucking breakfast.
That's just what they do.
And Hillary is a sociopath.
And even, so the AOC backing, I think this is all happening at a perfect moment.
AOC backing Bernie.
So that blows away all of the like the hit the Clinton Hillary people that were like, Liz Warren's our girl and AOC will fall in line with the identity politics.
So that's blown up.
So all of their bullshit.
Their house of cards is coming completely apart.
And I think this was like, you couldn't have asked for this.
Is the best thing Tulsi could have asked for is to have this kind of stupid bullshit because now Van Jones is on your side?
CNN is on your side.
And even Aaron Burnett is like.
Okay, I guess everybody's on that.
Hillary's major in college was pissing away goodwill.
Okay, so he's got some more to say.
This is a very, very dangerous game.
And there's a backstory here.
And there's two sides to every story.
Let's not forget, Tulsi Gabbard was picked out by the Democratic Party establishment and put at the top of the DNC.
They thought she was going to be their golden girl.
And she got in that position, the DNC, and she looked around.
She saw Debbie Wasserman Schultz and other people, Clinton allies, doing stuff they shouldn't have been doing in the primary.
And Tulsi publicly quit and then endorsed Bernie Sanders.
And it's been payback hell ever since.
That's what we are here.
Payback hell ever.
And that's exactly what is happening, ladies and gentlemen.
Plus, she's, and people forget, so it's two things.
Tulsi is telling the truth about our regime change wars, which everybody's in on it.
The media, the intelligence community, the military-industrial complex, and all the politicians.
They're all in on it too.
So when she starts at a debate and says regime change wars 13 times, people start Googling what the hell is she talking about?
And they start finding out exactly what's happening.
It's like Hillary Clinton and all the neoliberals are doing as Max Blumenthal explained that they're doing like a cover-up in reverse right now.
So they did it.
So this is like part of their cover-up because Tulsi is letting the truth get out about the regime change wars and how we're supporting terrorism all around the world and how this is bullshit.
And so they've got to like, they're like doing a cover-up.
But also the second thing is, the bigger thing almost is that she went against the DNC and Hillary Clinton when she stepped down and told the truth about Debbie Wasserman Schultz rigging the election.
Now, if you forget, they couldn't be less popular.
Hillary Clinton and Debbie Wasserman Schultz inside the Democratic Party, they were hated.
Do you remember at the 2016 Democratic convention?
Debbie Wasserman Schultz went to give a speech in front of the delegates in Florida, and this is what happened.
All right, everybody, now settle down.
Everybody settle down, please.
Okay.
All right, we have a big program.
We have a big program today.
Let's hear.
Let's be respectful.
Please be quiet for Debbie Hills.
We will cancel recess.
Can you make that my ringtone?
Yeah.
Cheaters need to speak, everybody.
Cheaters need to speak.
It's okay.
Everybody, let's hear from our speakers.
We have other speakers as well.
Thank you all so much.
That was an APAC moment.
And I love what Addicts is.
That was my doctor's reaction to my blood test.
Alice Smithy says, and here's a simple truth you already know.
No one on Hillary Clinton's cheating 2016 primary campaign should ever work in politics again.
And that's a fact, but they are.
And don't forget, this was in July of 2016.
68% of the country said Hillary's not trustworthy.
So this fucking idea that somehow she's a good person and she's a savior and we should all rally around her because of Trump is bullshit.
That's why we have Trump, because they nominated somebody the country already knew was a corrupt piece of shit.
That's why we have Trump, and they cheated to do it and rammed her down our throats, and that's why we have Trump.
So fuck them, okay?
Well, I'll say, one of this thing, too.
So we all know that Tulsi is bringing a lot of conservatives and libertarians over to her.
That's right.
So if this, and I, again, like we've talked about, Bernie Tulsi, Tulsi, Bernard, in either order, they can go, they could crush Trump, crush him, crush him, crush him.
And they know this because nothing would unify fucking red state voters more than you told Hillary Clinton to go fuck him.
Oh.
Oh.
The enemy of my enemy is my friend.
Yes.
It's like if you vote for Tulsi, you're saying, fuck you, Hillary.
Yes.
So from her book, Hillary said in her book, Why Am I Seen as Such a Divisive Figure?
And Joe Biden and John Kerry Hart.
They've cast votes of all kinds, including some they regret, just like me.
What makes me such a lightning rod for Fury?
I'm really asking.
I'm at a loss.
I don't know.
Maybe it's your lack of self-awareness.
Maybe that's it, you fucking warmongering maniac.
It must be painful to realize that you were so disliked that working-class people chose over you a guy who sits literally on a gold throne.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's so.
You're right.
Yeah.
You mean his toilet is gold?
I know.
So he's got him and the Pope.
You know, if you get past, if you get drunk, you pass out, you wake up next to a gold toilet.
Where am I?
The Vatican or Trump Tower.
I'm not sure where I am.
Six and one.
You know what I mean?
Vatican Trump Tower.
So he's got more to say.
Be proud.
We can't have a primary without the former nominee jumping on a podcast, throwing out his Persons, and then we went to Tweet War.
We got real problems in America.
But I'm telling you, Hillary Clinton's playing a very dangerous game.
You know what?
Who else is playing a very dangerous game?
I think Van Jones is playing a dangerous game by telling the truth about Hillary Clinton on TV.
And I just want to say I feel really bad about his suicide next Tuesday.
Yeah, let's hope he's not in that same prison cell they had Jeffrey Epstein, man.
No cameras.
No cameras.
Guards go on break.
There's no cameras.
Everything's a fucking, it's like Gilligan's Island.
one snap.
It's the perfect store.
You don't look good.
BELL RINGS Hello, this is Jimmy.
Yes, hello, this is Hillary supporter.
Oh, hi, Hillary supporter.
How shut up.
Don't talk to me.
Go to hell, you piece of shit.
I'm calling because I want to talk about.
Wait, wait.
Hold on, Hillary supporter.
You can't just.
Don't interrupt me.
Do not do it.
Okay.
Do not do it.
Okay, Hillary supporter.
Okay.
So.
Are you still there?
God damn it.
Sorry.
Look, I haven't called in a while because your show has become so toxic that I can't, like, listen to it.
I can't even hate listen.
I've tried, but I literally get hives.
But people that I don't care for routinely contact me on social media and inform me what you're talking about.
And the fact that you're even giving lip surface to that quizling that Benedict Arnold, that demoness from hell.
Hillary?
Oh, no.
You stuck so hard.
No.
Tulsi Gabbard, you stupid YouTube Creighton.
God, I hate her so much.
I just want to strangle her with that stupid Hawaii flower thing.
You mean her leg?
Don't correct me.
It's sickening.
It sickens me when you do that.
Hillary was right to say all of that about her that she said.
That Russia is grooming her and she's friends with Assad and she's going to do the same thing that Jill Stein did in 2020 that Jill Stein did in 2016.
She was right to say these things.
Actually, that's not true.
There's no evidence whatsoever that Tulsi, in fact, the firm that said Russian bots were propping her up, New Knowledge, was completely discredited for inventing fake Russian bots.
And of course, that's the same people that they rely on.
And Jill Stein isn't even running this time, so for her to come after her.
And by the way, people are permitted to participate in democracy.
Participating as a third party or fourth party or fifth party candidate is called participants.
Okay, okay, that's quite enough from the man.
Okay, thank you.
Good night.
This is my show, Hillary supporter.
Is it?
Is it really?
Yes.
Or is it Russia's?
Why don't you admit Russia pays for that whole studio you have?
Russia pays for the garage behind my house.
And that you're a Russian asset, too.
And Steph and Ron and your dog, you're all Russian.
You're actually Russian, like ethically.
Okay.
I can see it in your cheekbones, you fucking idiot.
Right.
Right.
Well, Hillary supporter, what did you think of Tulsi calling Hillary a warmonger in response?
Oh, my God.
What a joke.
What a joke.
Tulsi is the warmonger.
She was in the army.
They go to war, not Hillary.
She was in the White House as a cabinet member.
She was Secretary of State.
She had an Office with a chair.
What Hillary did was peace, not war.
What a joke.
Yeah, Hillary personally oversaw the invasion of Libya, which led to the complete failure of that state, from which it has never recovered.
Oh my God.
And when asked about it, she said, and I quote, we came, we saw he died, meaning Qaddafi.
Yeah, because she's a bad bitch.
I think for once, you and I might agree on something.
And Libya's better for it.
They literally have open-air slave markets now in Libya.
Oh, no, the poor men.
Won't someone think of the men?
You know what?
They just might have to toil all day, day in, day out for no pay, like women have had to for thousands of years.
You know, I'm so sick of this narrative that somehow men being sold into slavery in North Africa have it worse than the average woman in America, given what they have to put up with in the office, in the workplace, in public spaces, the harassment, everything.
It's shameful.
I mean, give me a break.
Wow.
Okay, well, then who is your candidate then?
Well, certainly not Bernie, that's for sure.
I hate him, too.
So full of himself.
He's always talking and just going on about his opinions, his important opinions, saying, Hey, all of you, turn your head towards me and look at me and listen to me talk.
Did you mean he's giving campaign speeches?
I guess, whatever.
And honestly, I'll just have to wait and see who Hillary endorses.
I mean, she should be president right now.
She should be.
And the least we can do is let her hand pick the new one.
Okay.
In the meantime, do you have a choice of your own?
I think that would be a little presumptuous, don't you?
Like, to what?
Just to choose my own candidate?
Are you insane?
Do you realize what would happen to my life if I chose Amy Klobuchar and then Hillary suddenly endorsed Elizabeth Warren?
Nothing would happen.
Okay, my name is Hillary Supporter.
That is my legal name now.
It's filed and everything.
So fucking up that bat would trigger my agoraphobia so intensely that I'd go from never leaving the apartment to never leaving the left side of the bed.
You understand?
So yeah, I won't be making any stabs in the dark as far as who I should or should not be voting for.
So, but don't you think that's not my decision?
It's Hillary's.
But what if Hillary tells you to vote for Joe Biden, who's, you know, got a horrible history with women and his over-aggressive sniffing and touching and what have you?
Then I'll vote for Joe Biden.
Did I stutter?
Did I stutter?
Okay, but.
That's my new thing.
I learned it from black women.
I feel so powerful.
So what about, what about, Oh, really?
I'm sorry.
From where I'm standing, it looks like the queen is still standing.
Yeah, but they call her the queen of warmongers now.
Oh, who does?
You and your little cadre?
You and all your Bernie bros and YouTubers.
Who cares?
Yeah.
Where I'm standing, she's standing tall.
That's because of all the cardboard cutouts that I have of her in front of me.
Now, some people think she's going to get back in the race in this race.
Do you think she's going to do it?
Oh, my God.
Quit teasing me like this.
I can't take it.
It's cruel.
Stop.
No, I swear to you, that there's some serious speculation that she might get into the race.
Yeah, well, I would have to lie down for a little while, I guess.
Okay.
That would change everything.
Yeah, that would change everything.
Everyone else would have to drop out, right?
But what happens?
She'd be running against a...
No.
Like by the laws?
No, because...
We should.
If you want to get Hillary, you go to jail.
New law.
Lock them up.
Sisters are doing it for themselves.
Okay.
All right.
Well, this is Hillary supporter.
We hope you can check back in with us later on in the campaign.
Oh, well, Hillary's never going anywhere, which means I'm never going anywhere.
Okay.
All right.
Well, literally, I'm a shut-in.
I don't leave my apartment.
I know.
All right.
Thank you.
I appreciate it.
She's a bad bitch.
So Tulsi goes on CBS.
And so watch this interview that, I mean, I'm going to play it's like a three or four minute interview.
Every question, except for the first one, every question is kind of mental.
First of all, I like they play that music.
Like it's fucking serious.
Right, there's some big shit.
Oh, whoa, what's gonna...
What are they going to say?
Bling the Christina.
Kill Christina.
Congresswoman Tulsi Gafford is responding to Hillary Clinton's comments suggesting that a 2020 candidate is being groomed by the Russians.
Congresswoman Gabber joins me now from Iowa City, Iowa.
Congresswoman, thank you so much for being here with us.
So in Tulsa, what did you make of Secretary Clinton's comments this week?
Congresswoman Tulsi, thanks for coming on our show and taking time out from your busy day to respond to allegations from an unhinged lunatic who once a gun shows how it's possible to lose a Donald Trump.
Thank you.
Okay, here she goes.
Let's be clear about what this is about.
Really, that if anyone stands up and speaks out to end the regime change war policies our country has had for so long, the likes of which we've seen waged in Iraq, Libya, and ongoing in Syria.
We will be labeled as foreign agents.
We will be labeled as traitors to our country.
So, really, what this is, this is a message to every veteran in this country who has put their life on the line to serve our country to every single American who believes strongly that we must end this long-standing foreign policy of being the world's police and waging these regime change wars, which is really the legacy of Hillary Clinton.
Then we are traitors to the nation that we love.
This is despicable on so many levels.
When you say regime change wars, what do you mean by that?
I was gonna give her the benefit of the doubt when I just saw her picture.
So...
Can you spell regime and change for me, Tulsi?
Those seem like big sort of Russian words.
Cut to 2025.
What do you mean by military-industrial complex?
Is that a thing?
So these are the people asking questions.
What do you, when you say regime change, what is a regime change war?
What do you got?
I don't get it.
When you say climate change, Jimmy, are you talking about like your thermostat in your house?
What is that?
Can you elaborate?
I mean, I understand what you talk about, change.
Anyways, no big deal.
Go back.
That's kind of stunning.
And if you watch, when she says it, Tulsi's starting to laugh.
Wow.
Oh, let's see.
You say regime change wars.
What do you mean by that?
Maybe with the way she swallowed her.
And then she just, she's like, are you shitting me?
This is worse than Megan McCain.
What am I on the view?
I mean, Tulsi, she's this close from going, how the fuck did you get on TV?
What do you mean, this game?
What do you say news reporter?
What do you mean?
What do you mean, news reporter?
Go ahead.
That is a...
This long-held foreign policy of the United States, of which Hillary Clinton was a champion for a very long time, of going around the world, acting as the world's police, overthrowing and toppling dictators that we don't like.
Again, wars that I've served in, the war in Iraq, the toppling of Gaddafi in Libya, and the ongoing regime change war in Syria.
This is what we're talking about.
This is what I have been strongly calling for an end to.
And this is the reason why she and her minions are trying to smear me, smear my character, and undermine my campaign, labeling me as a foreign agent, as a traitor to my country.
But, Congresswoman, with respect, Clinton did not explicitly name you in that podcast.
So why are you addressing the comments and bringing more intemperance?
Come on.
I mean, we're waiting.
Why are we going to fucking play this game all day?
Come on.
Who's the fuck?
Oh, maybe it was Kamala.
Is that what she's talking about?
Kamala was the Russian.
I think she's, like my friend Howie, she's just straight-facing it.
Because the longer you straight-face a joke, the funnier it is, right?
You know what you heard three months before this from her?
I'm a telecom major.
She's actually part of a vaudeville team that performed all over the country.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah, hither and thither.
She was there.
Okay.
Let's be real here.
Look at every single headline that's come out of her comments on that podcast.
Every single one has my name in there.
So let's not mess around here and pretend that it wasn't something that it was.
Would you ever.
If I was Tulsi, I would, after that remark, I would throw down what magicians throw down, smoke and disappear.
Where are you, Mick?
Where are you, Tulsi?
Like, you can't, you can't ask that question.
You can't say that if you coordinated an interview with Tulsi.
Yeah.
Right, you can't go, let's go ahead and have Tulsi talk about how she wasn't really named in the tweet by Hillary.
Is that why you guys have her out?
Because she wasn't really named?
Is that what you're saying?
Yeah, we had you out because just to make you feel stupid because she wasn't talking about you.
That's why we invited you.
So did this woman forget the top of the fucking segment where she said Tulsi was smeared by Hillary Clinton?
Here she is to defend it?
The fuck?
That's Tulsi's resting.
Are you fucking kidding me, Faith?
Tulsi's like, you see why I got this strip of gray hair, bitches, dumbass questions like this, motherfucker?
They're running as a third party candidate, as she believes.
No.
Possibly wouldn't.
No, I've said that many times before.
I've been very clear.
I will not be leaving the Democratic Party.
She can't even say the Democratic Party without throwing up in her mouth a little bit.
Why isn't she willing to leave?
Isn't that amazing that if you think in America we should have more than two political parties, you're somehow a traitor?
You're suspect that you might be a Russian or something.
They have five fucking parties in Canada.
They have sane parties in Norway.
We have two parties.
And the problem with voting for the Leicester of Two Evil is when there's two parties, they can set it up that way.
And that's exactly what they're doing.
But if you want to go third party, we're going to keep you in line.
You're going to be called a Russian.
That's exactly what they're doing.
It's fucking nuts.
And I'll do this again.
Yeah, but have you ever tried to go to seven parties?
It's so exhausting.
It's so exhausting.
Not be running as an independent or a third party candidate.
I am running as a Democrat to take our party back away from the control of people like Hillary Clinton and the war-mongering and corrupt powerful establishment and return our party into the hands of the people.
Make it so the Democratic Party is once again a party of, by, and for the people, a party that will fight for the people, fight to protect our planet, and that will fight for peace.
If it's not you, though, are you concerned about there potentially being a third-party candidate?
Look, I was giving these questions from the DNC, and that's what's happening.
I'm sorry.
She's like, she just got done saying we're taking back over the Democratic Party.
But what about a third?
Are you still worrying about a third party, though?
Let me ask you, are you worried about a fourth party?
How about a fifth party?
Can you explain what third party means?
I want to stay Focused on exactly what's happening here because this is a dangerous message that's being sent to the American people that if anyone, any veteran, any service member, any American stands up and speaks out for ending these regime change wars of ending this long-held foreign policy, this is how they will be treated.
So I'm calling on every American to stand with me as we stand up for the truth.
We stand up for peace.
We stand up for our freedoms, including our freedom of speech in this country, and invite them to join my campaign in doing this.
And freedom of democracy, I'm sure.
So, how concerned are you about?
What does that mean?
What are you talking about?
Find something that makes sense.
This is the producer in her ear.
What the fuck are you talking about?
Christina.
It's like she was in a severe water skiing accident.
And she's just, she had to learn how to talk and walk again.
And now she's like, in freedom of democracy.
All right, here we go.
Meddling in 2020.
Once again, this is not about Russia.
Let's stay focused on the issue at hand here: that Hillary Clinton is labeling me as a foreign agent and a traitor, smearing and undermining my campaign, both directly herself and indirectly through her proxies, who've been doing this really since I announced my candidacy for president.
The reason why she's doing this is because she knows that she can't control me.
She knows that she's not going to be able to manipulate me if I'm elected president to be able to continue these war-mongering policies that she has championed throughout her career.
This is about bringing our party back, bringing our country back into the hands of the people and ensuring our government is fighting for the people, fighting for our planet, and fighting for peace.
And you're using strong words here.
You've also used strong words toward Secretary Clinton on Twitter.
Has she said anything to you specifically?
Fuck.
You've said some pretty strong things to her on Twitter, and I just thought I should tone police you for a second.
You should have seen what I said to her on Snapchat.
This is like, I really commend Tulsi for taking time out of her day to talk to a college TV station.
Yeah, really.
Good for her.
By the way, is Tulsi polling at 2%?
Or really low, right?
In Russia.
In Russia, yeah.
Well, it's in certain states, like your earlier state, she's polling much higher.
So all Clinton is doing is raising her ploke.
Well, yeah, this was.
We're going to get to that, how it's backfired.
Or her profile and her profile.
I have not personally heard from her.
All right, Congresswoman Tulsi Gabbard.
Thank you so much for joining us.
Okay, there you go.
And now to a commercial for Raytheon.
Exactly.
So here is what Cody Two Bears says.
I support Tulsi Gabbard, and I am no Russian bot that mainstream media calls all Tulsi supporters.
Actually, I'm a native to this land, which is now America.
Hillary Clinton has no idea what war is sitting behind a desk.
Tulsi Gabbard knows firsthand of war.
I'm with Tulsi.
Tulsi 2020.
There you go.
There you go.
Curry Dobson says, Hillary has breathed new life into Tulsi's campaign.
I don't think any one person could have done more for Tulsi Gabbard than what Hillary did by attacking her in the way she did.
Aloha, and thank you, Hillary Clinton, for being so corrupt and narcissistic.
You couldn't resist.
Michael Tracy says, Hillary's internal monologue: the best way to deal with this candidate I want to disempower is to launch an insane, unprovoked attack and give her an enormous amount of attention.
Exclusive Twitter executive for the Middle East is a British Army psyop soldier.
Isn't that awesome?
So we're supposed to be more worried about free speech.
And if you watch them, when Jack went on Joe Rogan, they talk about protecting free speech.
The guy's working for the fucking intelligence community who's running their Middle East.
It says, head of editorial for MENA is a part-time officer in the 77th Brigade, an information warfare unit.
Okay, watch this.
The senior Twitter executive with editorial responsibility for the Middle East is also a part-time officer in the British Army's Psychological Warfare Unit.
Middle East Eye has established.
Gordon McMillan, who joined the social media company UK's Office six years ago, has for several years also served with the 77th Brigade, a unit formed in 2015 in order to develop non-lethal ways of waging war.
The 77th Brigade uses social media platforms such as Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook, as well as podcasts.
So when they say use them, they mean they do propaganda with them to control people's behavior.
That's why they're psyops.
And it was the data analysis, audience research to wage what the head of the UK military, General Nick Carter, describes as information warfare.
While clearly engaged in propaganda, the MOD is reluctant to use the word to describe the unit's operation.
Carter says the 77th Brigade is giving the British military the capability to compete in a war of narratives at the tactical level to shape perceptions of conflict.
So this guy is working for intelligent, for the government who's trying to shape people's perceptions of events.
They're trying to brainwash people.
They're trying to bullshit people, and he's the head of fucking Twitter in the Middle East.
Wow.
Some soldiers who have served in the unit say they have been engaged in operations intended to change the behavior of target audiences.
What exactly McMillan is doing with the unit is difficult to determine, but I bet it's pretty good fuckery.
However, he has declined to answer any questions about his role.
Twitter would say only that we actively encourage all our employees to pursue external interests.
Hey, maybe you'd like to coach a soccer team.
Or, you know, maybe do some psyops for a foreign government.
You know, things with your off time.
Psyops or a painting class.
I don't know, whatever you want to do.
It's all your option.
We encourage you to fuck with people on your own task.
McMillan, whose editorial responsibilities at Twitter also cover Europe and Africa, was a captain in the unit at the end of 2016, according to one British publication.
His involvement with the, you know, how they found out?
The guy fucking put it on his LinkedIn page.
Right there.
I have a strong interest in politics, international affairs.
I am a reserve officer in the British Army serving the 77th brigade, which specializes in.
He bragged about it.
These guys are so stupid.
They're so fucking stupid.
By the way, just so you know, Twitter also announced in September that it had suspended hundreds of coordinated accounts, which it said breached its platform manipulation policies.
You mean the manipulation policies that are being overseen by a guy who works for the fucking bullshit arm of the government propaganda wing?
That guy said you guys were platform manipulation.
That guy is platform manipulation.
I guess the people who they say were platform manipulating maybe had a narrative they didn't want you to hear.
And I don't need that fucking guy to censor people.
That's what Twitter's all about.
I can do it myself.
I don't need a Jagoff who works for the British psyops to tell me what's a bad tweet and to take away somebody's account.
I'm a big boy.
I can handle it.
But that's not what this is all about censorship.
And here it is.
I've been screaming about it when they started with Alex Jones.
And here it is.
They have intelligence people running fucking Twitter in the Middle East, let alone infiltrating it.
These had been opted.
Oh, by the way, they said these are bad accounts.
They were operated in Spain, Ecuador, China, Egypt, Saudi Arabia, and the United Arab Emirates.
I noticed that we are not on the list.
We did not make that list.
There you go.
*laughter* Oh, oh!
*Bell rings*
Hello?
Guess who this is?
That's it.
The only Democrat who's not running for president this election cycle?
Mingarini, big boy.
The one, the only Sherrod Brown.
Hey, it's not that nobody wanted me to run for president.
No, sir.
I've had a lot of important support for that.
Like who?
My barber.
He really wanted me to run.
He was big on it.
Then why don't you run?
Hey, you know there's a lot more to that phone call, but we don't have time in today's podcast.
How do you hear the entire phone call?
You got to become a premium member.
Go to JimmyDorkComedy.com, sign up.
It's the most affordable premium program in the business.
Don't freak out.
Don't freak out.
Today's show was written.
That's right.
It was written by Frank Connoff, Jim Earl, Ron Placone, Steph Samurano, and Mark Van Landowick.
All the voices today performed by the one and the only the inimitable Mike McRae, who can be found at mikemcrae.com.
That's it for this week.
you be the best you can be, and I'll keep being me.
Don't bring it out Don't freak out.
Don't freak out.
I'm not kidding.
Don't don't.
Don't don't.
Do not go out.
Do not freak.
Don't freak out.
Do not, do not.
Do not freak.
Do not freak.
Do not freak out.
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