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July 6, 2018 - Jimmy Dore Show
56:36
20180706_0705_TJDS_Podcast
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Time Text
Get ready for an outstanding entertainment program.
The Jimmy Dore Show!
It's the Jimmy Dore Show.
The show for...
The kind of people that are...
It's the show that makes Anderson Cooper say.
It's hard to talk to you, Kevin.
Here's a guy who sounds a lot like me.
It's Jimmy Dore!
*Dramatic music* *Dramatic music* *Dramatic music* *Dramatic
music* Yes, fuck the media.
Oh, man.
God damn, this place is packed out.
Look at this.
This is unbelievable.
We love you too.
We love you Boylan, Oregon.
Wow, this is something.
You guys sound excited.
All right, let's meet our panel.
Come to the stage right now.
You know her, you love her.
It's the miserable liberal.
it's Steph Samarano!
Hello.
I mean, Ola.
Ola.
Ola.
All right, let's bring out our next guest.
Boy, one of my favorite shows on the YouTube is the Humanist Report, and he's here with us right now.
Mike Figueredo!
What's up for Lynn?
I love my city.
Look at you with your badass tattoos.
Look at you.
I'm a hipster, Jimmy.
What can I say?
Oh, shit.
What is that a tattoo of on your forearm?
Of a little astronaut.
Of an astronaut?
Astronaut, yeah.
Oh, wow.
That is, wow.
Thank you, Jimmy.
Yeah, if you get up real close.
Yeah.
I've almost reached full hipster status.
I've got the beard.
I've got the gauges.
I've got the tattoos.
Now the only thing that I need to start doing is wearing Capri pants or skinny jeans.
Super close.
Super close.
Fucking skinny jeans.
They're funny.
That's all that.
I want to see what your keys look like.
Shrink wrapped.
I always did.
That's funny.
That's so funny.
All right.
Let's bring out our next guest.
Of course, you know him.
You love him.
It's Ron Placone, ladies and gentlemen.
Come on.
I got the skinny jeans covered.
My ears were tingling.
So here is Amber Tamblin.
Do you know who she is?
She's an actress, I guess.
You know who she is?
You're young.
And do you know where she acts?
What is she on a show or something?
You're in a movie.
If there was only a way we could find this out.
There's a library around here, right?
Do they have microfilm?
Get the microfilm of old newspapers.
Yeah, yeah.
It's a good idea.
So she says, liberals who wouldn't vote for Hillary with the new Supreme Court justice being appointed by this administration, we could see the end of many things you thought you were protecting in making such a choice.
The irony stings.
This nightmare belongs to the right, but also you.
Not as bad as the nightmare of actually setting foot in Pennsylvania, Michigan, and Wisconsin, right?
Imagine having to listen to actual people.
Yes, we could see the end of many things you thought you were protecting when you chose a Wall Street puppet during an anti-establishment title wave, when your party lost both houses of Congress, when your president put journalists in fucking jail, became a war criminal, and left the DNC bankrupt.
But Susan Sarandon.
Yeah.
Here we go.
Look at this.
Look at this tweet, Chain.
There you go.
Oh, I feel a series of rage tweets coming on, trying to control myself.
Must not act Susan Sarandon.
And then Deborah Messing.
What a Samantha B-word she turned out to be.
Why not?
And then Kathy Griffin.
This is so juicy.
This is the world's shittiest threeway, ladies and gentlemen.
And you know what?
Susan Sarandon couldn't jump in on that thread because she was busy protesting, by the way.
Yeah, that's what she was up to.
Yes, Susan Sarandon was out knocking on doors for Ocasio-Cortez.
Yeah.
And getting arrested and getting arrested.
Now here's a guy, Andy Richter, Andy Richter from the Conan O'Brien show.
I love that Conan O'Brien show because he's gotten not one bit better since the day he fucking started.
He sucks.
He sucks just as much as he did from day one.
Conan's a nice person, but he's a shitty comedian.
Anyway, if you like him, that's good.
Good for you.
He sucks.
I'm sorry, because you're right.
I am right.
So Andy Richter says, you didn't vote for the Democratic candidate because they weren't progressive enough for you.
You didn't vote for the Democratic candidate because you thought it made no difference.
You didn't vote for the Democratic candidate because you thought it was safe.
Please don't do that again.
Correction, we didn't vote for the Democratic candidate because she, A, wasn't a progressive, B, wasn't even a fucking Democrat.
And C, all the above.
Okay, how about that?
Boy, Putin must.
Well, here we go.
I said it's nothing more than voter shaming.
It's blaming the powerless.
Try blaming the powerful who propped up Trump.
know, the Clinton campaign and the media who created him.
Thank you.
Hey, or how about this, Andy Richter?
Why don't you call out the system that cheated the guy who actually inspired voters?
applause And then I tweeted this.
I go, here's a profile on minorities who voted twice for Obama and were so let down that half of them didn't bother the vote and the other half voted, but not for Clinton.
Try getting out of your neoliberal bubble populated by millionaires and listen to voters.
And then, and then I think because at his core, Andy Richter is a decent human being and a nice guy, he's just, you know, got awake to politics like the rest of the fucking liberals when Trump got elected.
That's his big problem.
He came back and he apologized.
Isn't that nice?
He said, I need to apologize.
The people like, I know, it feels nice, right?
He goes, I need to apologize for this tweet.
I was bummed by the Kennedy announcement, and I said something snotty and unhelpful that rightly angered a lot of people with whom I overwhelmingly agree.
I deleted it, and I'm sorry for picking fights with family.
Oh, isn't that oh?
I think Putin got to him.
Boy, he's bummed.
He's bummed by the Kennedy announcement.
I was bummed when Obama lost both houses of Congress and then blew Wall Street.
But I'm weird that way.
I'm weird that way.
I think he's turning over a new leaf and he's going to write a book about the dangers of the Electoral College.
And then people start coming at me.
This guy goes, Andy, you did not need to apologize at all.
Jimmy Jordan knew how important the Supreme Court was going to be, but turned on the Democratic Party for independent Bernie.
And then when Bernie lost, continued to berate the only hope we real Americans had to stave off fascisms.
Yeah.
Fuck that guy, is what I say too.
I'm very powerful.
I don't know if you guys know that.
I don't understand why the liberal establishment isn't nicer to me because I will throw the next election too.
Thank you.
LAUGHTER APPLAUSE APPLAUSE Mm-hm.
LAUGHTER I was going to say that tweet did get one like though from Freed Sapphire.
One guy.
Yeah, you know, the thing to me that's weird is that we're hearing from all of these celebrities now talking about politics for perhaps the first time they could have been using their platform to help Hillary Clinton if they really wanted to get her elected.
I mean, how many people in this room phone banked for Bernie Sanders and canvassed for Bernie Sanders who are currently canvassing for Dorothy Gask right now?
They could have just tweeted and did a lot that they want to blame people with no power in the same way that Republicans will scapegoat immigrants, people with no money and no power.
So it's just a different form of blaming people with no power.
And it's bullshit.
We're all just smart enough that we're on to their games.
That's it.
You think you're so smart.
So get this.
I got tweeted at again.
His name is Kurt Nice, and he said, since the Supreme Court news, not one of these mealy-mouthed pieces of shit have had anything useful to say about it.
Jank Uger, Kyle Kalinske, and Jimmy Doerr, they were all complicit and cynical enough to get us here.
Now they're too cowardly to admit they used bad strategy.
First of all, I don't think he's so nice.
That's kind of a misnomer.
He's like, he should be called Kurt Dickface.
Who doesn't understand how shit works?
I like how, I like when centrists call progressives cynical.
Because I always have to ask, what is more cynical than thinking a person who stands for the policies that other countries that have less wealth than us take for granted wouldn't be able to beat a game show host?
What is less cynical than that?
There's nothing less or more, yeah, more cynical.
And I don't have anything to say with regard to the substance, but I'm just a little bit offended that I wasn't called a mealy-mouthed piece of shit as well.
I mean, where's humanist support there?
What the fuck?
I feel left out.
He didn't, he's jealous of your beard, so he didn't include you.
I think that's.
When I read that, I was like, oh, Mike's going to be pissed off.
He's not called a piece of shit.
I just want to be included.
Here's what Glenn Greenwald had to say.
He said, the responsibility to win elections rests with the candidate, the paid campaign staff, and the party.
When they lose, the fault is theirs.
Yeah, it's understandable, I guess, why they are desperate to frantically blame others for their own failings, but it's amazing how many go along.
And I love how this guy, just Jason Carney, he nails it.
He goes, hey, it's all our faults.
I mean, all we wanted was a people-centric candidate that had a fair shake at actually changing this country for everyone.
Someone who realized there are massive inequalities across the board.
Where do I go to get punished now?
And again, to Glenn Greenwald's point, no one ever holds that goddamn, I've never seen this before in the history of the country where they blame fucking voters, right?
At least the worst they did before was blame Ralph Nader, but they didn't blame the voters.
Because Jill Stein got like 0.0% of the vote, so they really can't fucking blame Jill Stein for this.
So they go after the voters.
And well, this is what I love.
This is what blows their argument out of the water.
Here we go.
But it does beg the question, how is it that these Russian operatives knew to focus on purple states like Michigan and Wisconsin?
And your campaign didn't.
Ha ha!
I want to play that again.
Here we go.
But it does beg the question, how is it that these Russian operatives knew to focus on purple states like Michigan and Wisconsin, and your campaign didn't?
We knew because we invested in Google Maps.
Our budget included some for Google Maps and Taco Tuesday.
And then we made memes.
Ron, you're funny.
Thank you, Steph.
Thanks.
You know, for everyone talking about the election, I have a winning strategy for Democrats to win, and it's so simple.
I printed it out and put it on a fucking shirt.
It's policy over platitudes.
It's that simple.
Give people exactly what they need, and you'll win.
They'll get out and vote.
Give me the Support.com.
Nobody blames the party whose strategy in the election was this.
For every blue-collar Democrat we will lose in Western PA, we will pick up two, three moderate Republicans in the suburbs of Philadelphia.
And you can repeat that in Ohio and Illinois and Wisconsin.
How'd that work out for you, Chucky?
And Jimmy, let me just say this.
For all the celebrities blaming Green Party voters and Bernie Bros, how many of you guys have heard them advocate for ranked choice voting?
Zero!
Zero.
How many of them have advocated for getting rid of the goddamn Electoral College?
Zero!
So again, I don't get that shit.
And so if you really want to blame somebody for the Supreme Court, the Democrats are blaming someone.
Guess who they're blaming?
They're blaming themselves.
The Democrats regret not fighting harder for Obama's Supreme Court pick.
They got steamrolled by Mitch McConnell, but they could have done more to prevent him from stealing the seat.
Goddamn right they could have.
Here's what, here we go into the, we should have shut down the Senate, said Brian Shatz, Democrat of Hawaii.
We made a calculation that they were going to win the 2016 election and confirm a nominee.
Didn't work out.
No, it was that maybe it was Barack Obama and the Democratic Party's fucking fall because they made a goddamn choice to not fight it.
They didn't do anything.
They didn't shut down the government.
They barely even fucking talked about it.
Hindsight is 2020, said Senator Mark Heinrich, Democrat of New Mexico.
I think I would have liked us to take an even harder line.
Hey, guess what?
You didn't take even a fucking line.
You didn't take nothing.
They did shit, nothing.
They used that again to try to shame you into voting for Hillary Clinton.
They offered you fear.
Oh, if you don't vote for Hillary, that Supreme Court seat, that's all they fucking have.
And as Chris Hedges says, once you stop being afraid, they start being afraid.
That's all.
So, in fact, they even go on to say the issue was Garland himself.
He was too moderate and too boring for some, and he just didn't excite progressives.
There were options to pick someone the base would have been mobilized to support because of who they were and what they represented for the court, said Heidi Hess, co-director of the progressive group Credo Action.
Garland felt like a pick to play chess with the Republicans, and it didn't work because they don't play respectability and civility.
They obviously, this man is qualified, so we're not going to block him.
That was never going to fucking happen, ever.
And here's the final piece of that article.
Chris Kang, who worked for the Obama White House for six years and played a central role in getting his judicial nominees confirmed, said, there's no question the Democrats could have done more to push Garland's nomination through, even if they had limited options in the minority.
So all you motherfuckers, why don't you start blaming the goddamn people who actually have the power to make decisions that actually matter?
That's who you should be upset about.
Oh!
The Democrats and Barack Obama didn't fight hard enough for that Supreme Court pick.
Ah, I think I'll blame a guy who fucking doing a YouTube show in his garage.
I think I found him.
You think he smokes a lot of pot, and he's very powerful.
By the way, this martini is fantastic.
I had too many martinis last night.
I was fucking hammered by the end of the show.
When I was meeting people, I was fucking jack-faced.
Yeah, I was jacked up last night.
Okay, we'll skip that.
You know what this is, right?
But it does beg the question: how is it that these Russian operatives knew to focus on purple states like Michigan and Wisconsin, and your campaign didn't?
I just like playing that.
I just like playing it.
So here we are.
So this is New York City's stand, Fazio Porte.
She's 28 years old and she doesn't give a shit.
I feel like she's like me, like she doesn't want to be friends with these motherfuckers, right?
She doesn't want their friendship.
She doesn't want to go to their parties.
She wants to be an outsider throwing a rock at the inside, and that's what she's doing.
And Debbie Lofsom and Schills had some shit to say about her.
She said, oh, she won.
There will be consequences.
Who forgot to rig the machines?
Who forgot to purge all the progressive voters?
Did I forget to pay somebody?
Sorry.
Did you watch the video, honey?
What's that?
I think so.
Yes, I got this sent to me from Russia.
It was from a payday lender in Russia.
So I love how they call her a leftist, right?
Oh, she's a leftist because she's advocating for policies that most of America agree with.
How is that a fucking leftist?
She's for single payers.
60% of Americans are for it.
She's for free college.
She's for a living wage.
She's for breaking up the banks.
She's for ending the wars.
That's what everybody is fucking for.
Thank you.
But the establishment says, oh my God, communism, she's coming.
That's what, oh my God, run alert, run alert.
But you know what, though?
Don't worry.
If you are the type of person who reads the New York Post, you know you're going straight to the ice cream goes crazy story.
You can't have pickle ice cream under communism.
Can't do it.
That's a three-page full-color spread of ice cream.
LAUGHTER Can you imagine you can actually read and you buy that fucking newspaper?
Isn't that a good thing?
And it's right next to the other ones.
It's right there.
That's so fucking weird.
By the way, here is, this woman writes for the Business Insider.
And she says the Democratic Party needs to decide if it's the party of Mike Bloomberg or the party of Ocasio.
For those of us that don't want to see a second Trump term, let's hope they decide to be the party of Bloomberg.
Unbelievable.
One more day.
They've been the party of Bloomberg since 1992.
I don't know if you noticed, they're wiped out.
They're wiped out.
The Bloomberg Party just lost to fucking Trump.
I don't know if you noticed that.
At the Democratic Convention, they wouldn't let Nina Turner on goddamn stage, but they let Mike Bloomberg on the goddamn stage.
A billionaire who instituted the racist stop and frisk was invited onto the Democratic fucking stage while they kicked off a progressive grassroots activist, Nina Turner.
That's what's wrong with that fucking party.
We're already to bloom McCarty, you fucking motherfucker!
Thank you!
That's why she won.
We rejected the fucking party of Bloomberg.
The Democratic Party needs to decide if it's the party of rich uncle pennybags from the Monopoly game or a young woman of color.
But hey, we're a big tent, people.
And just to remind everybody, Michael Bloomberg is the guy who said that if Bernie Sanders won the nomination, he would threaten to run as an independent to spoil the election.
He literally threatened that.
So this is who this individual thinks the party should get behind.
You know what?
Billionaires, though, really do care for us.
The party of Bloomberg that lost 1,200 seats, all three branches of government and turned the White House red.
What are you talking about?
It's been 40 years of the rich.
It's time for we the people.
The 1% have had a good long run.
America needs a new direction.
Here's Nancy Pelosi talking about...
So here's, they ask her about Ocasio-Cortez.
Let's see if we can hear this.
I don't know.
It's kind of a fucked up recording.
Let's hear it.
They say that one of the things this deputy shows is that Democratic socialism is ascendant in your party.
Are they right about that?
No, they're not.
So they asked if Democratic socialism was ascended.
And she's like, no, no, no.
No.
No, it's descended from New Deal Democrats.
They're just rediscovering it again.
That's all.
That's all it is.
There we go.
Yeah.
Oh.
Yeah, it's not ascended.
It's descendant.
It's ascendant in that district, perhaps.
But I don't accept any characterization of our party presented by the Republicans.
So let me reject that right now.
Right, Mr. Connery?
Not yet.
You can join me.
Spoken like a true leader.
Who is not inspired right now?
Our party is a big tent.
Our party is a big tent.
You know, we have everybody.
Wall Street bankers, pharmaceutical lobbyists, military industrial complex people.
It's a big tent.
A lot of motherfuckers.
A lot of big fat cats in there.
Oh, yeah, it's a big, gotta have a big tent.
It's full of, because it's full of fat cats.
How are you gonna fit all those fat cats inside of a tiny tent?
You gotta have a big tent.
It's a big tent, and don't worry, it's not rent-controlled.
It's more like a big litter box, the Democratic Party.
Completely full of shit.
Hey, this big tent needs some air.
Somebody crack a window.
Am I right?
The Democratic Party is increasingly younger, more female, more diverse, more aggressive.
Should the Democratic House leadership look that way?
Well, I'm thinking.
So someone's asking her, hey, the Democratic Party is becoming more progressive, more female, more young.
Shouldn't they do that shit?
And blah, blah, blah.
Here's what she says.
Yeah, I'm congressive on that.
She just called, did you hear what she said?
I'm a progressive.
She couldn't say it with a straight face either.
I'll play it again.
I'll play it again.
Democratic House leadership looked that way.
Well, I'm female.
I'm progressive, I'm...
And progressive.
What's your problem?
She has three beds.
Democratic voters for your last night was president, right?
Yeah, they did.
They made a choice in one district.
So let's not get yourself carried away as an expert on demographics and the rest of that within the office or at the same time.
So she's downplaying Ocasio-Cortez's role.
She's like, that was just one district.
Don't make a big deal out of it.
It's like, no, it's the country.
That's why Bernie Sanders was filling stadiums with his populist agenda.
You know, Jimmy, and not to mention, it's the first time in 25 years that an incumbent lost that place.
Yes.
That's a pretty big 25 years.
She fucking rocks.
Yeah, I agree.
By the way, Nancy, if you think it was just that one district, here's a poll.
It says, important for Democratic candidates'priority to promote a progressive agenda, 72% of Democrats and independents.
Thank you.
That's why.
And who are her?
Look at this.
Let's look at that.
Look, it says, oh, please join Congresswoman Anna Eshu and House Democratic leader Nancy Pelosi for a luncheon benefiting the Driple C. That's on June 29th, 2018.
That was just the other day.
And it's at the home of Liz Simmons and Mark Heising in Atherton, California.
To join us as a member of the Pelosi 250, donate $237,000 fucking dollars.
But, well, look what you get for that quarter million dollars.
You get a VIP clutch.
I've never had a VIP clutch.
I've never been clutched.
I'd like to clutch somebody by the bell.
I'll tell you that.
I don't know.
I don't know if that's okay to say.
It is.
So you get your VIP clutch and a photo opportunity and preferred, ready to do this?
You get preferred.
Oh, wait, you get preferred Seating.
Do you see that?
Preferred seating, or you become Pelosi 100.
That's $100,000.
Who fucking wants to talk to those pieces of shit?
Am I right?
$100,000, and that gets you also a VIP clutch, a photo opportunity, and preferred seating.
Hey, if I'm going to spend an extra $150,000, I want something more than those pieces of shit $100,000 donors.
You know what I'm saying?
That's not right.
And then if you look at the bottom where it says ticket, it says speak, you can become a member of the speaker's cabinet for only $33,000 per couple.
But you don't get a clutch.
No, you have to sit there and watch other people clutching.
And it's a hell of a clutch.
It's made out of pony blood and fracking fluid.
It's an awesome clutch.
And then at the very bottom, it says, you could just be a guest for $10,000.
We'll give you lunch.
We'll give you lunch.
You get lunch and a photo opportunity.
So that's what's wrong with the Democratic Party.
Those are the people she's meeting.
If you don't have more than $10,000, she's not even going to fucking talk to you.
She won't even clutch you.
So maybe that's why she's so out of touch because that's all she talks to is people who have enough money to give her $30,000 or $200,000 at a clip, right?
She never actually talks with you people or people like us, right?
Like after the show, I'm going to talk to anybody who wants to fucking talk to me after the show.
I'm going to talk to them.
Will I get a clutch?
I will clutch you.
I will clutch you.
And so, yes, hopefully, you're not wearing a thong.
Because that could fuck up your clutch.
So, Barack Obama gave a speech the other night in Los Angeles at a DNC fundraiser.
And what he said was, Do not wait for the perfect message.
Don't wait to feel a tingle in your spine because you're expecting politicians to be so inspiring and poetic and moving.
So he's literally saying, Hey, don't expect much out of your elected leaders, right?
Fucking lawyer.
Come on, they're not going to do a lot of shit for you.
Just handle it, all right?
That's what he's fucking saying.
And you know what?
He's right because the last guy who actually did inspire me and give me a tingle ended up governing like a fucking moderate Republican.
So maybe he's right.
We shouldn't get excited about those people.
And of course, I'm talking about him.
Anything, because here, because here it is, here's him admitting that.
The truth of the matter is that my policies are so mainstream that if I said the same policies that I had back in the 80s, I'd be considered a moderate Republican.
You don't say.
So Barack Obama is admitting that he is supposed to be a leftist, yet he's governing as a moderate Republican.
So he's not even doing it as a center-left Democrat.
He's not even doing it as a centrist.
He's doing it as a center-right Republican.
That's why people think liberalism and progressivism doesn't work because they think he was progressive and he was president for eight years and their lives got shittier.
So progressive doesn't fucking work.
No, he was doing fucking Ronald Reagan.
That's why your lives got shittier.
That's why the fucking 90% got less money in the recovery.
It's because he's doing Ronald Reagan.
Why don't you try doing FDR and see what happens?
Thank you.
I'll throw it to my panel.
Any comments on this, Ron?
He just remembered Wall Street and forgot about Main Street for eight years.
For eight years.
For eight years.
So, you know, I was moderately ignoring Main Street.
Well, I just kind of want to go back to the comment about the tingle about the politician.
He's kind of just telling you to settle when they inevitably try to shove someone like Joe Biden down our throats in 2020.
That's essentially what he's telling us.
That's what he's setting you guys up or is trying to set us up to accept Joe Biden.
Shut up and take it.
Shut up and take it.
Or Joe Kennedy, Mr. Fucking Harris.
Or Kamala Harris.
Or Corey Booker.
Kamala Harris is a cop.
Just remember that.
And I don't know how you feel about cops.
I don't fucking like them.
And I like to, I like to, when I'm at a protest or something, there's a copy, I like to kick them.
But not like this.
Like, I'll have a suit coat out.
I'll be like this.
I just go, boom, like that.
I'll just keep walking.
And they're like, who the fuck did that?
Not me.
I'm white.
a suda Boy, some shit happened here yesterday, huh?
Did you see the video?
There was some shit happening.
I have to, the bad boys, there's people called bad boys.
You know what that is?
Proud.
That's it.
Proud boys.
Yeah.
Proud boys.
No shit, right?
It sounds like an underground, like, yes.
A one-hitter 80s band.
proud boys proud boys Give me.
Proud boy.
Proud boys.
What are you doing with your fake shield?
Proud boys.
Hot boys!
We will travel with our tiki torches.
Proud boy, praise boys.
Hey, you know, we no longer have an Amazon link because we're not doing that.
We're not playing that game.
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So you know ICE is horrible.
ICE.
What does ICE stand for?
Because we used to say immigration and customs enforcement.
Oh, immigration and customs enforcement.
Okay.
Because we used to have a thing called INS, which was immigration and nationalization services or naturalization services.
And then after 9-11, the Bush and the Democrats got together to decide to come up with another organization.
Well, we're going to talk about that right now.
So you know ICE is bad.
You know what's been happening?
They're a fascist organization that needs to be gotten rid of.
We don't need ICE.
In fact, there's a lot of people calling for the abolition of ICE, right?
So here's a guy named Sean McElwey.
He's from in the nation, he writes, it's time to abolish ICE.
A mass deportation strike force is incompatible with democracy and human rights.
I totally agree.
I totally agree.
ICE, as it presently exists, is an agency devoted almost solely to cruelly and wantonly breaking up families.
This idea that people, again, let me disabuse you of this idea that people join law enforcement because they want to do good.
If you join ICE, you're a fucking sicko, okay?
If you join ICE, you like fucking with people.
That's why you join ICE.
You don't join ICE because you try to help people.
You join ICE because you get your rocks off by fucking with people.
And I'll say that to anybody who's in ICE.
We don't need you.
Go away.
You want to help people?
Go teach kids to read.
Go become a fireman.
Go volunteer somewhere.
Go become an EMT.
Go become a doctor or a nurse.
Go become a teacher.
You want to help people.
You want to be a fascist prick breaking up families?
Join ICE because that gets your rocks off.
So the agency talks about and treats human beings like they're animals.
They scoop up people in their apartments or their workplace and then take them miles away from their spouses and their children.
Groups like Indivisible Project and the Center for Popular Democracy have also called for defunding ICE.
Brand new Congress, a progressive PAC, has the proposal in its immigration platform.
These lot of progressive organizations saying defund ICE.
ICE is terrorizing American communities right now, said Angela Padilla, policy director for the Indivisible Project.
They're going into schools, entering hospitals, conducting massive raids and separating children from parents every day.
We are funding these activities.
We are funding these activities.
Your tax dollars are funding these activities.
And we need to use all the leverage we have to stop it.
ICE was a direct product of the post-September 11th panic culture and was created in the legislation Congress passed in the wake of the attacks.
From the start, the agency was paired with the brand new Department of Homeland Security's increased surveillance of communities of color and immigration and immigrant communities.
By putting ICE, this is important.
By putting high ICE under the scope of the Department of Homeland Security, the government framed immigration as a national security issue rather than an issue of community development, diversity, or human rights.
So you see what this is?
So now we've created this ICE and they're treating immigrants not as a problem of community development or of human rights or diverse.
They're treating immigrants as terrorists.
That's what's happening.
And turns out the terrorists are the victims and we're the Nazis.
We're doing shit that I thought only Nazis would do.
Tear babies away from their mothers as they're breastfeeding.
That's what fucking Nazis do.
No, that's what America does.
A lot of Americans can't wait to join ICE to do it.
And by the way, it didn't start with Trump.
The central assumption of ICE in 2018 is that any undocumented immigrant is inherently a threat to our national safety.
In that way, ICE's tactics are philosophically aligned with racist thinkers like Richard Spencer and the writers at the white supremacist journal VDARE.
Horman, so this guy Horman, who's the acting ICE director, does not apply a light touch when expressing his authoritarian tendencies.
So this ICE has become this fascist, authoritarian, fucking nightmare creator.
And here's what this guy who's the head of ICE has said.
He has threatened to jail and prosecute local officials in so-called sanctuary cities that do not fully comply with ICE mandates.
That sounds like the Gas Gestapo.
That sounds like the SS in Germany.
We're going to come in and we're, we're, we have the authority and we're going to imprison.
You don't kill these Jews.
We'll put the mayor in jail.
That's what this sounds like.
The agency has also clearly been targeting political opponents for deportations and has worked to deport individuals for speaking to media about ICE.
That's happening.
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, who is challenging Joe Crowley in New York's 14th congressional district, which covers most of the part of the Bronx and Queens, told me, this writer for the nation, that she believes that after a long and protracted history of sexual assault and uninvestigated deaths in ICE's detention facilities, as well as the corrosive impact ICE has had on our schools, courts, and communities, it's time to reset course.
Sergey Patel, a child of immigrants, is running a well-funded insurgent campaign against Democrat incumbent Representative Carolyn Maloney in New York's 12th congressional district.
And this is what Sergey says.
Defunding ICE and returning it to be a passport patrol and customs enforcement agency rather than an above-the-law deportation squad is a critical step to protecting all Americans and our civil liberties.
So let's go back to what we had before 9-11, an agency that was dealing with passport patrol and customs enforcement.
The call to abolish ICE is, above all, a demand for the Democratic Party to begin seriously resisting an unbridled white supremacist surveillance state that it had a hand in creating.
Remember, the Democrats joined George Bush to create ICE.
ICE hasn't always been here.
We don't fucking need ICE.
Though the party has moved left on core issues from reproductive rights to single-payer health care, it has not done that.
It's time for progressives to put forward a demand that deportation be taken not as the norm, but rather as a disturbing indicator of authoritarianism, because it is.
So where's Chuck Schumer and Nancy Pelosi saying we're going to defund ICE?
We're not voting for the next thing.
We're going to defund.
They're not doing that.
Because as I'm going to show you in a second, Kamala Harris supports ICE.
The senator from the bluest of the blue states.
This is from Vox.
Pretty much, this is great.
This is from Vox.
By pretty much any quantitative measure, arrests, deportations, the share of all deportees who had no criminal record, any year of Obama's first term saw more aggressive immigration enforcement than Trump's first year.
So, by any measure, the Obama administration was much tougher on immigrants their first year than Trump was, by any measure.
By any measure, Obama's first year was worse for immigrants than Trump's.
Think about that.
And then wonder why 30-some percent of Hispanics voted for Trump.
But because ICE was being run by a Democrat, one who had promised to legalize unauthorized immigrants, many progressives didn't pay much attention at the time.
And more important, the policy was packaged very differently.
Oh, so again, what we've said here, Obama puts the fucking left to sleep.
So Obama was doing this horrible shit.
And where were the Democrats?
Where were the progressives?
But now Trump's doing it, and everyone's awake, which is what we said would happen on this show: that Trump is going to put an ugly face on the horrible shit our country's been doing for the last eight years.
And he is.
The administration itself, meaning the Obama administration itself, downplayed the aggressiveness of its tactics.
It spent most of its time promising that ICE was going after felons, not families.
Though it wasn't until November 2014, six years after he was elected, 2014, when a Department of Homeland Security memo set restrictive guidelines on when ICE could arrest unauthorized immigrants, that felons, not families, became more or less a reality.
So it wasn't until six years after the bullshitter Obama's presidency started that he actually implemented the policies he claimed he was.
But because it's a change from a period of relative safety, deportations did go down in the final years of the Obama administrations, his second term, not his first.
And because of Trump's anti-immigrant rhetoric, it feels like something new, but it's not.
So now you want to hear what the bluest senator from the bluest of blue states had to say about ICE.
Here, Chris Hayes asks her, should ICE be abolished?
Here's what she has to say.
Should ICE exist?
So he asks, Can you turn up a little in the room?
So he asks, should I exist?
Should ICE exist?
Should ICE exist?
Well, certainly when we're talking about people who have.
Well, certainly.
That's the senator from the bluest of blue states.
Should ICE exist?
This thing we invented after 9-11 that we don't need, that is terrorizing our cities and people of color.
And here's a woman of color saying certainly it should exist.
This is our senator from the bluest of blue states inside your Democratic Party.
Should ICE exist?
Should ICE exist?
Well, certainly when we're talking about people who have committed serious and violent crimes, you know, I mean, Chris, you know my background.
I'm a prosecutor.
I believe that there needs to be serious, severe, and swift consequence when people commit serious and violent crimes.
One human being kills another human being, a woman is raped, a child is molested.
There needs to be serious consequence.
And certainly, if they are undocumented, they should be deported if they commit those serious and violent offenses.
We already have a system in place to deal with that, Kamala, you bullshitter, you proud prosecutor.
We already have in place.
Someone murders someone, someone commits a sexual assault.
We already have police to investigate that and prosecute those people.
We don't need a federal organization to do that.
There's already police in place.
And if that person's undocumented, they commit a felony, they're already going to be deported.
We don't need another organization, another white supremacist, fascist organization.
But this is your leading Democrat.
She's the most progressive Democrat on immigration in the Senate.
This is her.
And she's full-throatedly supporting ICE and giving you a bullshit reason for it.
This is gaslighting.
Yes, ICE has a purpose.
ICE has a role.
ICE should exist.
You tell me what kind of a garbage party the Democrats are.
You tell me this is who the Democrats want us to vote for for president.
This is my senator.
These are garbage politicians.
She is bought and paid for.
She is not one of the good ones.
She's your enemy.
But this, Bernie wants you to join this party.
This is the party Bernie wants you to join.
The party where the leading senator from the bluest of blue states, the most progressive on immigration.
Of course we need ICE.
These people are murdering people and committing sexual assaults.
Did you fucking hear her?
She sounds like Trump.
This is your resistance.
So there you go.
If Kamala Harris is for ICE, I'm not even going to put ICE in my fucking Coke anymore.
How about that?
You know, Jimmy, I was just going to highlight again how Kamala Harris, when she was the attorney general, our prison system still exploded.
She's such a punitive person.
She was ordered by the state to release because of the overcrowding.
She was ordered by a court three times to release prisoners.
She didn't fucking do it.
And her office, you know what their argument was?
That it would hurt our prison labor population.
That was their argument.
I'm not making that up.
So every time there's a fire in the state of California and they need extra people to help, they get prisoners.
They use prisoners for that.
Prison labor.
They train them, certainly.
And these people are trained just like a fireperson would be trained, okay?
But if they're hurt during while they're helping with this or they're killed, they will not receive any kind of compensation, nor their family, if they lose their life while fighting the fire.
So, you know, it's free labor, everybody.
And that's what we're doing right now.
That's our jobs program, the military-industrial complex and the prison industrial complex.
That's where we're getting our labor.
So this is your Democratic Party.
This is what's wrong with the country.
We have two right-wing parties propping up a racist criminal justice system, propping up a racist ICE.
This is unbelievable.
This is not leaders.
This is the opposite of leadership.
When people are screaming their heads off about what's happening right now with babies literally being Ripped away from their mothers as they're nursing.
And she says, Of course we need them.
They're rapists.
This is what she said.
She sounds like Trump.
That's your fucking liberal progressive from a blue state.
Senator Kamala Harris.
If there was any justice in this world, Kamala Harris would be in prison for not prosecuting Steve Mnuchin.
She's corrupt as they come.
I got no problem saying that about her.
She's corrupt as they come.
And if you're against Trump because he's corrupt, you got to be against her because she's corrupt.
And this is living.
Proof of it.
She's probably cool with ICE because she's taking money from private prisons that they're putting those kids in.
I'll bet you any money she is.
She's got to.
Why would she say something so fucking offensive like that?
She would say, no, these immigrants are murdering people and raping people and committing sexual assaults.
Of course, we need to have ICE.
And they need to be deported.
What?
That's your fucking answer?
That was her answer to that question.
You heard it.
I just played it for you.
You want to hear it again?
It's horrible.
Should ICE exist?
Should ICE exist?
Well, certainly when we're talking about people who have committed serious and violent crimes, you know, I mean, Chris, you know my background.
I'm a prosecutor.
I believe that there needs to be serious, severe, and swift consequence when people commit serious and violent crimes.
One human being kills another human being.
A woman is raped.
A child is molested.
There needs to be serious consequence.
And certainly, if they are undocumented, they should be deported if they commit those serious and violent offenses.
So yes, ICE has a purpose.
ICE has a role.
ICE should exit.
How do we deal with those problems before ICE, Kamala?
How do we deal with when an immigrant committed a crime before ICE was invented?
What did we do?
We just didn't prosecute it?
Or did the police investigate it and then prosecute those people?
So that's Kamala Harris again doing what Democrats do, corporate fucking stooges.
They gaslight you.
She's gaslighting you.
And I wish I had the rest of that clip to hear what Stooge, corporate stooge Chris Hayes had to say, because I bet it wasn't worth a shit.
This is your fucking corporatist gangbang.
This is Chris Hayes getting $30,000 a day to interview someone who's also getting fucking millions of dollars from the same donors to fucking lie to you, to say we need ICE.
Hey, this is Jimmy.
Who's this?
Hello, this is Offended Listener.
Oh, hi, Offended Listener.
And I am still a Hillary supporter, by the way, till the day I die.
Quite frankly, you know what?
I'm glad she lost.
What?
This stupid country doesn't deserve Hillary.
If she had one, we wouldn't have been grateful enough for her sacrifice and her service, and it would have made me sick.
Yes, sick to my stomach.
Hey, you know there's a lot more to that phone call, but we don't have time in today's podcast.
How do you hear the entire phone call?
You got to become a premium member.
Go to JimmyDoorComedy.com, sign up.
It's the most affordable premium program in the business.
Today's show was written.
That's right, it was written by Frank Connoff, Jim Earl, Ron Placone, Steph Samurano, and Mark Van Landowicz.
All the voices today performed by the one and the only the inimitable Mike McRae, who can be found at mikemcray.com.
That's it for this week.
You be the best you can be, and I'll keep being me.
Don't freak out.
I'm not kidding.
Don't freak out.
Don't freak out.
Do not freak out.
Don't freak out.
Do not, do not, do not not freak.
You do not freak.
Do not freak out.
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