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Oct. 4, 2022 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

01:21:55

S04E172 - THE PEOPLE HAVE SPOKEN

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	Calgary, Alberta's preoccupations.
	That's the band, Preoccupations.
	Calgary.
	Great little town when it has oil.
	When it has oil, it's like Zurich, Switzerland.
	And they make tons of money.
	And then some asshole comes along and says, this place is rich.
	I'm going to manage it.
	And then they tax it to death.
	And now it's Detroit.
	It's a shithole now because it got overtaxed.
	Man, when oil was...
	They had it from sand.
	They would take it out, but it's a very expensive process.
	When the price of oil goes up, it becomes affordable.
	Shit, now the gas is so expensive.
	I wonder if Calgary's tar sands are viable again.
	I was there when shit was booming, did a comedy set just off the dome, an hour and a half.
	Blew Todd Berry off the stage, which was nice.
	But then I saw it again a few years later, and as Sheila Copps at Rebel News goes, this place is fucking done, toast, ruined.
	So that band used to be called Viet Cong, which is kind of a ballsy name.
	Not that ballsy, though, right?
	The Viet Cong were bad guys, little rats in the holes.
	We lost 60,000 Americans to them, no Canadians, despite what Ann Coulter thought.
	And they got in trubs.
	People called it racist.
	They called it appropriation.
	That's Canada for you.
	Remember we had that chick on?
	She wrote a song called Savage, and her record label dropped her because it was offensive to Indians?
	What?
	It's like a really popular clothing brand, for one.
	And Savage is a common saying.
	Remember the previous Florida hurricane?
	There was some German-sounding guy, and they said, so you're not leaving.
	You're going to stay here.
	And he's like, well, this is our community, and we feel obligated to stay and make sure everything is okay.
	And then as the dad's explaining that, the little kid leans into the shot and goes, we're savage.
	Like it's a compliment.
	And it reminds me of that band, The Muslims.
	Remember them?
	They changed their name to Softpack.
	Yeah, that's them.
	This was a hit.
	I like that guy.
	He's a good guy.
	It's always surprising when you meet a band that's really cool and they're all nerds.
	Remember that when we would have ska bands stay at our punk house in the 80s and early 90s?
	They're all geeks.
	They're like, aren't you in a band touring?
	Shouldn't it be cool?
	But they were nice.
	Good guys.
	Anyway, that's enough of that talk.
	Yesterday's show, I thought, was the quintessential show.
	I was very happy with the way that went down.
	That I could bring Putin into the studio.
	Right, but also that you got Putin to use that same song.
	Yes.
	That was impressive.
	But what's going on with your hours, by the way?
	You've managed to squeeze a gym in three days a week and have it bite into your daily time.
	That's our gym.
	You're the one who wanted to go to.
	I said, I should sign up.
	You wanted me to sign up for a long time.
	And I said, you know, you're right.
	Yeah, but then you've got to stay late.
	Okay.
	If you come in at 11.30, you now got to stay till like 6.30.
	I thought it was 11.
	Well, it's 40 hours a week at least.
	So 9 to 5.
	If you make it 11, then it's 11 to 7.
	Two weeks in a row, I clocked.
	I don't know if it was a live show day or whatever, but it was like 12 hour days.
	Or 11.
	I don't know if it balances out carryover week to week, but better.
	That'd be cool.
	So let's go to yesterday's show's comments.
	Because the tech guy said, I had to put in a correction about Stalin.
	They were criticizing you.
	And I said, thank you.
	I don't usually read the comments.
	It's the road to, what do they call it?
	The path to madness.
	Please shut the fuck up about news, politics, racism, Jan 6, top surgery.
	More shitting on Bill Burr and stories about your parents.
	So just do like a Riffin comedy garbage show.
	That doesn't seem like very good advice to me.
	Well, 48 people did not like that comment.
	Oh, really?
	I can't really see that very well.
	Yeah, like we're good for Bill Burr for a while now.
	And as far as my crazy parents, I can repeat some stories.
	I like to do that, but I think we're all out.
	So that, and plus, this show is, the purpose of this show is like Daily Wire, Ben Shapiro, Tucker Carlson, Howard Stern with the news.
	The core of the show is the daily news.
	We want you to be informed when you hear this show.
	It's just a fun way to be informed.
	It's actually for people who hate the news.
	And for me to just sit here, we kind of do that with Compound Censored.
	And on Thursday nights, we just shoot the shit.
	So you got your shit shooting.
	So that's a dumb comment, irrelevant.
	Totally ignoring it.
	Next.
	Now, if we want to get to the correction, it'll probably be at the bottom.
	No, we'll go through all of them.
	There's a lot.
	Well, we'll just skim them quickly.
	Go to the top.
	God, why are you making this so complicated?
	Okay.
	Now, I don't see the top one anymore.
	Never stopped fighting.
	Please have the fucking fight.
	I'm black, y'all boring.
	Why do they capitalize being black?
	Ancient news.
	Never stop fighting.
	Boring.
	Here we go with another week.
	Great to start my night.
	Thank you.
	Top 10 again.
	I don't know what that means.
	I'm with you, Eating Dapo.
	More Jimmy McInnis.
	Gav, just call him up about Blue Bayou.
	Okay, that's good advice.
	Try to get my dad more incorporated.
	I tried to buy him a computer so we could Skype him in.
	He said, no, I'll just get it, which means I won't bother.
	The constipation song is proof that Indian culture is superior.
	Socialism, it's as dumb as a bag of hair.
	Putin bit went way longer than it needed to.
	Now, that's an interesting comment.
	The Putin bit was brilliant, and we did the entire speech.
	So you get to hear his speech in a funny way.
	And now you've heard his entire speech.
	That's true.
	It's not really a bit.
	It's not like he's doing Bill Burr for 20 minutes.
	It's a spoonful of sugar to make the medicine go down.
	That is Putin's entire speech he gave to the world.
	Gav's intro songs are fringe cringe.
	That's bullshit.
	Keep going.
	I feel like a toad.
	A nigga put an HTML in the comments.
	This guy.
	Someone post a link to blah, blah, blah.
	Gavin is against Putin's speech.
	Such a dumb boomer fag.
	I don't think you were against it.
	You actually.
	Well, it's both.
	I mean, he pointed out some good things, but Putin sucks.
	I don't support Putin.
	I don't support the war in Ukraine.
	They can all die.
	I'm a Western chauvinist.
	I have no interest in the East.
	Go ahead and blow up Ukraine to smithereens.
	Couldn't care less.
	I don't like Zelensky.
	I don't like Putin.
	Fuck them both.
	I think this war is 60% fake.
	I think it's a giant scam with elitist globalists, and that includes Biden.
	They're all involved in this theatrical shit show that does cost real lives, but also has a lot of fake ones.
	I'm kind of shocked that Gavin didn't address Kevin Brennan shitting on him and the Proud Boys on, what's the next word?
	I can't see it.
	Burning Bridges.
	On MLC this weekend.
	What's MLC?
	Oh, Misery Loves Company.
	So he has a show on Compound again?
	Yes.
	I think he's back.
	Okay, well, let's dig that up.
	Wasn't he fired?
	Yes.
	He was fired, then he was a regular guest.
	Now he's back.
	Well, we'll have to check that out.
	I'd appreciate time code.
	I don't want to sit and watch Kevin Brennan's fucking weird rathead for an hour and a half.
	He was probably joking.
	He's funny.
	This guy's funny.
	He looks and sounds like a drunk ratatouille.
	If you've ever been to Russia, you'd know their religion is alcoholism.
	Yeah, boring.
	Yep.
	Can somebody tell Gavin that Ryan sucks monkey balls at impressions?
	What?
	Eight people liked that.
	Ten people didn't like it, including me.
	Oh, so you commented on this?
	No, I just downvoted it.
	Oh.
	What a weird take.
	You wasted most of this show with...
	So Ryan's impressions suck, do they?
	That's a pretty big part of the show to not like.
	You're not mentioning the Wikipedia article on the Ya Yaz, Gavin.
	Yeah, why would I be?
	I'm a pariah.
	I'm not mentioning any early aughts anything, including books about the early aughts and vice.
	I'm not mentioning entire biographies about vice.
	So wake up, shithead.
	Thanks for talking about my band all the time.
	The early aughts, okay.
	First time I heard Ya Yaz in Iraq.
	I like them.
	The Putin impression thing sucks.
	Carhart.
	Yeah, I don't really care about that kind of stuff.
	I'm not going to not wear clothes because I don't like how they treat their employees.
	Gavin is a moron.
	The baseball cap with the abnormally long brim prevented the guy from seeing...
	It looked a little abnormally long.
	See, isn't it amazing these people calling me a moron and they're anonymous?
	Isn't it pathetic?
	But then we looked through it.
	That was my claim also, but then we looked through it and then that guy just wears weird nondescript hats.
	That's got nothing to do with what he's saying.
	Yeah, yeah, no, it does.
	Because it's like, well, why is that guy wearing this weird long-brim hat?
	He wears those same types of hats in other videos way before the magic thing.
	Yeah, but we were looking up not the fact that it had a long brim, but the fact that it was new.
	They were all like the same hat.
	They were like, whatever company makes no logo hats.
	So this is someone else that hates your impressions, which is weird as shit.
	This is why I never read these comments.
	I disliked all these.
	Are my comments really annoying?
	No, it's baby monsters who were wrong.
	Jungle, whatever her name is.
	That's that Asian chick.
	I always skip past the parts where Ryan is doing his impressions.
	This guy's really spending some time on that comment.
	I laugh so hard my sides hurt.
	See, the problem with positive comments, too, is you take these seriously and you don't take the negative ones seriously.
	I'll quote that.
	Blue-collar chic is just another way of saying poser.
	Like that guy who always carried around a skateboard.
	Yeah, all fashion is posing, you fucking idiot.
	What do you think fashion is?
	It's LARPing.
	I mean, are you allowed to have fringes or wear cowboy boots if you're not a ranch hand?
	Of course it's posing.
	It's all Halloween.
	That's the whole game, dummy.
	I'm going to do a big thing on Blue Color Chic.
	I'm very excited about this.
	I want you to come to my house, Ryan, and we'll do a whole fashion show with links to all of the different products.
	And you can obviously notice that it's LARPing or posing.
	What a fucking idiot.
	Why is Gavin defending Ukraine joining NATO?
	I never said that Ukraine should join NATO.
	What happened to Gavin?
	Did they threaten his family?
	Blah, blah, fucking blah.
	You got to bring the family into everything, don't you?
	Yeah, I don't want Ukraine to join NATO.
	We want fag Putin once a week.
	I didn't think he was gay.
	I hated the Putin bit.
	I'm sick of being lectured to by bitchy clown that knows more about Sid Vicious than foreign policy.
	Why are you here then?
	Why are you paying $10 a month to come and gripe?
	Fuck the UN, fuck Davos, fuck the EU, fuck Ukraine, and their fake puppet government and their fake faggot president.
	Fuck this.
	Yes, I agree.
	What a waste of an episode.
	You guys are becoming annoyingly predictable when it comes to geopolitics.
	Is it really that predictable?
	I'm always surprised by my takes.
	Hey, Matt, that is the future of North America.
	Cheap chinks with painted on white surface.
	Anyway, you get the idea.
	White surf for faggot personality.
	I didn't even get to the one I wanted to.
	Keep going.
	Is it new?
	Because it would be all the way at the bottom.
	Oh, my God.
	Gavin's historical literacy and understanding of geopolitics is utterly embarrassing, says anonymous person.
	That Putin speaks judgment cringeworthy.
	Thinking that Stalin bombed Dresden was the icing on the cake.
	What an idiot.
	So to be clear, Stalin was the man behind the bombing of Dresden.
	The fact that the Allies actually did the bombing is irrelevant.
	It's a fact that Stalin kept pushing Churchill to bomb Dresden.
	He was directly quoted saying, why haven't you bombed Dresden yet?
	It was his idea, and he wanted to draw troops over there.
	So that's utterly embarrassing.
	See, it's the thing that gets me with these millennials is the fucking arrogance.
	If a 52-year-old told me something about geopolitics, I wouldn't cringe and say it's fucking embarrassing.
	I'd say, didn't the Allies bomb Dresden?
	That wasn't Stalin, was it?
	You'd be a little more curious.
	And then the smarter, older person would say to you, you know, yes, but if you look at the history of World War II, Stalin was the guy that was really all about the bombing of Dresden.
	I don't have a tie clip for this tie, and I saw it in America First Pin would do the trick, but it's kind of annoying and distracting.
	I think, I don't know how many views it get, like we get 30,000 views for the Eps or something.
	But 100,000, I mean, 130 comments isn't a lot, but it is good to see people saying stuff.
	It's just always mean.
	I like the nice comments.
	No, as an artist, you have to just keep doing your art and not be inhibited by comments or criticism.
	That's the kind of shit that slows you down.
	It's in my book, Death of the Cool.
	There's a quote about it.
	Oh, I'm sorry.
	You just have to keep driving.
	And if the real critics are the subscribers, if you notice your subs are going down to the water, this isn't financially tenable.
	Well, I don't really think I could change.
	So I just have to pack it up and leave.
	Are you a commenter?
	No?
	Because I think there's two different types of people.
	never comment, I might comment something like...
	Yeah.
	I'm not on anything.
	I'm banned from anything, so I can't get it.
	What about YouTube?
	My aliases are always like Judy Bloom.
	What about YouTube, no?
	YouTube I'm not on as me.
	Oh, okay.
	I'm banned from YouTube, obviously.
	What do you mean, what about YouTube?
	Did you not know I was banned?
	I thought that you could at least have a viewing account and you just couldn't post.
	I know.
	I guess not.
	You can't do anything.
	Wow.
	Speaking of geopolitics, North Korea flew a missile over Japan.
	I guess I kind of care.
	I almost put that in shit I don't care about.
	Seems pretty bad.
	What the fuck?
	What are you doing there?
	It's the link.
	No, it's not the link.
	It is.
	I have it on TV.
	No, it's not.
	What the.
	There is no link for that story, you fucking moron.
	I just saw the nearest link.
	Yeah, that's not using your brain.
	I'm quick.
	You be quick or accurate?
	What do you want?
	Let's stick with accurate.
	Fuck.
	So, yeah, I guess this could be, this maybe should have gone in my pet Biden.
	This might be hubris coming from foreigners because they see our weak and mentally dead president creeping chicks out, getting lost.
	You know, Biden's incompetence is a great example of Trump derangement syndrome.
	People hate Trump so much they will take Mr. Magoo over him.
	Remember there was that bumper sticker that said, I'll take a cup of coffee over Trump, anyone but Trump?
	I didn't know they weren't exaggerating.
	Some clown jumped on the field this weekend, an animal rights activist.
	It was really fun seeing him nailed.
	You don't really see it in the footage.
	Now, this is 1-3.
	If you look closely, he circles around.
	He sort of does a jackknife right turn right there, and then he gets nailed right there.
	But if you look at the article, it's better because you can see the scene where his own pink cloud, they're big on the smoke bombs.
	How'd you get that into the stadium?
	I guess there's no steel in them?
	I don't know how you do that.
	But look at that.
	He's getting checked right as the smoke goes in his face.
	That felt pretty good.
	But I looked them up.
	This guy's got great leg muscles.
	Look at that development there.
	Great calves.
	I looked up, which I guess was the point of his little exercise, what he was promoting.
	It's the right to rescue.
	So what they do is they go to farms and slaughterhouses, but mostly farms, and just free like a couple pigs.
	So they get arrested, obviously, for trespassing and theft and all kinds of shit.
	And then you, I guess, pay to get these people released so they can go do it more.
	So go up to the top and click cases.
	Here we go.
	So these guys went to Sunrise Farms.
	That guy went to Rigland Farms.
	Someone went to Farmer John.
	They just go to these various farms and kill shelters.
	This woman, click on that turkey ranch.
	What you don't want us to eat turkeys, Abby.
	If you're saving so few animals you could name them, you're probably not doing a big making a dead.
	We freed Abby.
	Abby's like, don't bother.
	Oh, everybody's like, what the fuck are you taking Abby for?
	What about us?
	Yeah, I need help too.
	Just open the door.
	Okay, one thing you're not hearing about that particular shot is that particular chick was being a bitch.
	I didn't know that.
	Yeah, she was starting shit and she was running her mouth.
	How'd they fucking know of Abby?
	That's when I came in.
	To save a bird.
	Poor baby.
	What the fudge?
	The fact that she's making noises makes me somewhat more optimistic.
	This is low.
	I don't know who has a lower IQ, the turkeys or these heroes.
	They're peers.
	I didn't have a team to save her.
	I was a vegetarian for 15 years, and I think this is fucking retarded.
	That looks like a very sick bird.
	What about that?
	Yeah, save the sick one.
	Yeah, but Abby's more attractive.
	Like, yeah, that's got to be.
	The one with the skin disease is like, what am I, chopped liver?
	I'm about to be.
	Yes, we got a bunch.
	Dude, farmers have guns.
	You're going to get your head split open.
	Oh my god, this is ridiculous.
	This isn't like an inside job, but like.
	No, they're trespassing.
	That's why they're on this site.
	They're going to jail.
	Hi, Hanson.
	Abby got better, and she was delicious.
	We raised her for Thanksgiving.
	So I don't know, is that person in jail?
	That was listed as a case.
	Anyway, thanks for coming out, guys.
	Also, at Borderline, shit I don't care about.
	So Herschel Walker is over the target.
	And you'll notice every time a Republican's doing well, there's a massive controversy.
	And this controversy is now that Herschel Walker had a baby out of wedlock and had an affair.
	Oh, and he also convinced a woman to have an abortion, even though he's pro-life.
	And then his son, the incredibly gay conservative Christian Walker, said, well, this is an old tweet of his.
	But if you, I don't know, go up from that.
	Yeah.
	I know my mom and I would really appreciate if my father, Herschel Walker, stopped lying and making a mockery of us.
	You're not a family man when you left us to bang a bunch of women, threatened to kill us, and had us move over six times in six months, running from your violence, he says.
	Yet this is the same guy who said earlier, June, this is two years ago, thankful I had a black father who empowered me to be a victor and supported me on my endeavors instead of pouring victimhood into me and telling me I'm oppressed.
	Happy Father's Day, Herschel Walker.
	So I'm sorry, Christian, but I still haven't made my mind up on Herschel, but you just canceled yourself out.
	So we don't care what you say.
	You contradicted yourself, so you're gone.
	Bye-bye.
	Home to mommy.
	But say he did.
	Well, if he beat his wife and stuff, that he shouldn't be running for anything.
	You're out.
	But say he did convince a woman to have an abortion, but he's pro-life.
	That's hypocritical and everything.
	But can you still be a pro-life politician if you've in the past tried to convince someone to have an abortion?
	I don't know.
	I'm not fixing my die like I'm guilty, by the way.
	No one's ever had an abortion because of me.
	Ever.
	Never.
	I've only gotten a woman pregnant that I wanted to get pregnant, which was my wife.
	And I actually don't understand how anyone gets anyone pregnant.
	And every time I ask people, they never go, oh shit, the condom broke.
	It's always like, yeah, I came in her.
	What?
	Yeah, I just, it felt good.
	I wanted to.
	Okay.
	Do you also shit your pants?
	Do you piss your pants?
	Do you just start jerking off on the train?
	That feels good.
	Louis C.K. Oh, look at these.
	This is crazy.
	What's this?
	Apparently, he's been loving his father for a long, long time.
	Yeah, for real.
	Pesopic also had a video of them hugging recently.
	Yeah, I saw that.
	He was getting off the stage, and his dad kissed him, and he hugged him.
	Herschel Walker says, I love my son no matter what.
	Wow, that'd be like, it's a bummer if your son's gay, but it's a bummer if he's that gay.
	This is gay.
	You want...
	Yeah.
	BLM and the left are nothing.
	Oh, we're celebrating in the streets right now over career criminal George Floyd.
	Gerrick Chauvin is a political prisoner.
	How are we supposed to have a fair trial when gang BLM, that's what they are, they're a gang.
	Gang members BLM are out in the streets intimidating the jury.
	Sleepy Jim Crow Joe Biden is pressuring the jury to convict.
	The media is churning it up.
	That's enough.
	I agree with everything you're saying, but just chill.
	I mean, it is a big deal, but chill.
	What a gay person he is.
	You don't want to hear that.
	Even if you're proudly gay.
	Gay face.
	Go back up there.
	Oh, there's the hug.
	He's like, you're fucking disowning me?
	Yeah, that's what I wanted to say.
	If you're going to do that and do a 180, then you go, look, I've flattered my father in the past because we are good now, but we weren't good back then.
	And the back then is bad enough that I don't think he should Run.
	I love him and I've stood by him, but I'm not sure I stand by him to the point of having him run for office.
	Yeah.
	That I can take.
	That explains everything.
	But this like, fuck you, you bitch.
	Can you really trust gays?
	I don't know, man.
	They're duplicitous from birth.
	Not from birth, but.
	They betrayed their genetics.
	Well, from the second they realize they're queer, which is, I don't know, they probably realize something is up around six or seven, you start being duplicitous.
	So by the time you're an adult, you've been doing it for fucking 10 years.
	Go back to that first picture, though.
	He has the gayest gay face I've ever gay faced.
	That one.
	What is it with the monster?
	Physiogamy.
	I can never pronounce that word correctly.
	No, it's a hard G. Pull in.
	Like the guy on the old man clearly has normal non-gay bone structure.
	Yeah.
	The gay man has his eyes are juicy.
	He just finished crying.
	Oh, his face is the contacts.
	His cheeks kind of have this like flatness to them like they've been pushed up against an ass.
	The teeth are too smiley.
	Look at the Herschel guy's like, all right, I'll sort of smile.
	I'm not going to sell myself short.
	His hair is just monkeypox.
	He's actually bald.
	It's infected monkeypox like those sad turkey babies.
	How are you so gay you look like Nick Kroll?
	Is that possible?
	That's what's doing most of nothing like Nick.
	You've got to do a detector shit.
	Are you kidding me?
	Look at that.
	That's Nick Kroll.
	What?
	Let me even blend them together.
	Not even close, dude.
	Very close.
	Nick Kroll is a spoiled Jew, and Christian Walker is a spoiled mulatto.
	That's really helping.
	Thank you.
	If you don't do a detective shitty, then you're failing at your job.
	Okay, let me see here.
	Nick Kroll and Christian Walker.
	That's one for the books, folks.
	Okay, I got one.
	That should be on the ready.
	That should be in your favorites tab.
	It is.
	Okay, then.
	However, this one isn't.
	No, it's not coming, but tonight.
	Gavin is wrong and Ryan is right.
	I don't agree with the imagery.
	Why are you black at the beginning?
	Yeah, I don't like it.
	Actually, let's just go with the classic.
	That one's more flattering.
	Speaking of shit, let's talk about some shit I don't care about.
	Shit I don't care.
	Shit I don't fucking care about.
	Shit I totally don't even care about.
	Shit I don't care about.
	So remember the try guys.
	The low-T personification of everything that's wrong with the modern world.
	It is four dudes who, remember when they got Dr. Fauci on?
	You got to pull that up.
	They were so giddy and excited because he's so great.
	What?
	Even if I totally bought the vaccine and COVID and thought it was a global pandemic, even if I was that retarded, I would still not be that excited about meeting Fauci.
	I have the participant window open and I get to allow him to enter.
	It's weird.
	I'm going to be smiling because I'm just excited to see him.
	Some nervous energy.
	He's a busy man.
	He's been lots of world saving.
	We were 45 minutes early.
	That's Ned.
	Okay, ready?
	I'm meeting him right now.
	Here we go.
	They're straight, right?
	They're all straight, I believe.
	And you know, you're a low T group when the Asian is the alpha male of the group.
	I think he had the highest T?
	Yeah, he's a tough guy.
	He might be gay.
	I don't know.
	He's got a pretty gay face.
	Gay face, gay hair.
	And then this guy, Ned, recently was fucking an intern or a co-worker at work.
	So you go, oh, well, that's fucked up.
	Like, imagine I found out Anthony Kumi was fucking Luby over at Compound.
	I'd go, oh.
	Well, that's kind of weird.
	Missy's going to be bummed.
	I would never mention it to a fucking soul.
	And the last thing I would do, oh, gross, would be make a video.
	First of all, say I had the power to fire him.
	Firing him would just never occur to me in a million years.
	Sorry.
	I don't approve of infidelity, but it's none of my beeswax.
	Secondly, making a video about how I've fired Anthony or you or Garrett.
	Imagine I fired Garrett.
	Again, I don't have that authority, but this is a hypothetical here.
	It doesn't fit into my head.
	My new barber keeps giving me this lump here.
	I don't like.
	I don't like.
	All right.
	So they found out that Ned, the ugliest guy in the group, who's sort of the family man, and his whole shtick, in their defense, go to 1-8.
	He's really big on my family, my family, and here's my children, and this is my wife.
	Like that, feeling grateful that I get to spend this special time with my loves.
	What stance is that?
	Yeah, what is that stance?
	Wait, zoom in on his hand?
	Oh, it's in his pocket, and there's a piece of wood there.
	Okay, that was confusing.
	But look at the next picture.
	Loving my wife so much.
	Gay hand.
	Can't explain it.
	Can't really break that down for you any further.
	With the hand on the glass?
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	Gay drink.
	Yes.
	Go to all of his pictures.
	We have really blurred the line between straight and gay these days.
	Go down a bit.
	Soy face.
	Yep, that's the face.
	Look at that.
	So he leans into it.
	Oh, my lord.
	He leans into it a lot.
	He really enjoyed.
	Oh, there we go in a dress.
	That's something maybe you send your friends to be like LOL.
	I think we're living in the Venn diagram of high T homos and low T straights.
	They are the same.
	Look at his overalls.
	I was just looking at that.
	This craziest thing about this controversy is that someone fucked him.
	What was she thinking?
	The kids like dress more masculine than he is.
	Yeah.
	There they share clothes.
	Ew, his little bow tie.
	His little outfit.
	Look at that.
	I get dressed.
	Look at that Y picture.
	Please don't be a Mets fan.
	Oh, good Yankees.
	By the way, my Mets bet after these losses with the Braves, had a lot of people mocking me and other Mets fans.
	Ew, gross, we have a similar bet.
	I'm down to $250.
	We have a similar vacation.
	I was up at $1,800 at one point.
	Wow.
	But my total for the year is down to $250.
	I know.
	We had some serious losses.
	Anyway, here are the try guys dumping the homo we just saw for fucking a co-worker.
	And they are so pissed.
	But especially the Asian dude who's dressed like fucking Bruce Lee in 1979.
	More of a Chuck Norris type of outfit, I'd say.
	This is something we took very seriously.
	We refused to sweep things under the rug.
	That is not who we are and it's not what we stand for.
	We immediately removed Ned from work activity.
	Does he watch the show?
	Holy shit.
	Calm the fuck down.
	Damn, Chinese man.
	Holy shit, he's pissed.
	...and engaged an HR professional to conduct a thorough review of the facts.
	We also opted to remove Ned from our releases pending the results of that review.
	Over a few weeks, that's included removing his section from videos, digitally removing what Asians really care about, right?
	Assuming this guy's Chinese.
	Fish.
	Money.
	I think what happened was they got on TV.
	They were on True TV or some like shitty network.
	And they just had their next series canceled because of this.
	Oh.
	And so that's what he's really pissed about because he just lost whatever.
	He was making $10,000 an app.
	That's gone.
	He's got a new house, new mortgage.
	His wife, who's probably Asian too, he seems like the kind of Asian who would marry an Asian.
	She's furious.
	This is what I love about the Shit I Don't Care About segment.
	I find a way to be interested in it.
	Because I don't give a fuck that Ned fucked an intern.
	Imagine caring about some nerd's penis going in some slidey hole of some retarded chick.
	Farthest thing from my mind.
	Choosing not to feature him in our merch throws.
	Honestly, I want to give major props to our editing staff for how deftly they've handled that.
	There are several videos that we've deemed as fully unreleasable.
	You will never see them, and that is due to his involvement.
	And that's a decision that has cost us lots of money.
	We will not be able to recoup that money, but it's a decision we stand by proudly.
	Now, we can't talk about the details of the review, but suffice to say, we found that Ned had engaged in conduct unbecoming of our team, and we knew that we could not move forward with him.
	So on Friday, September 16th, the three of us signed written consent of the members of Second Try LLC approving the removal of Ned as a manager and an employee.
	Oh my God.
	Their LLC is called Second Try.
	That's pretty good.
	Which has a second chance connotation, but there are no second chances with infidelity.
	It's kind of like that dude who, that coach who fucked someone that he worked with, 19.
	What are you laughing at?
	The comments.
	Oh.
	I told you I sticked chicken out to Frieza.
	And then your teacher call.
	You going to explain what happened?
	What a weird outfit.
	Is that his angry shirt?
	Also, don't wear cutoff sleeves if you have my arms.
	If you have Grover arms, do not wear cutoff shirts.
	But yeah, remember the coach?
	I think he's the Celtics coach?
	Yeah.
	Suspend head coach Ime Udoka for upcoming season for violating team policies.
	I used to do that to people that wanted Lyme disease.
	Celtics.
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	He had a consensual intimate relationship.
	I don't think he was even married.
	Like, isn't that where you meet people?
	A lot of people meet each other at work.
	So the argument is, well, it's quid pro quo, and you fuck him because you would be able to move up the ladder.
	Yeah, I guess that's bad.
	Should that be illegal?
	Letting a chick who bloat...
	She blew her way into the White House.
	It's unethical.
	It seems gross to me.
	It seems like a form of prostitution, but it's all of Hollywood.
	Like, Harvey Weinstein is not this anomaly.
	It's called the casting couch for a reason.
	Virtually every woman you see on the screen sucked a dick to get there.
	I don't like it.
	I don't want my daughter or my wife, obviously, ever getting involved in that industry, but that's what goes on.
	So this coach losing a year because he can sensually fuck someone who's having a great time.
	And I don't think he even provided any kind of raise for her.
	It's just a policy they have.
	And then as far as this asshole cheating on his wife, it's a hypocritical, horrible thing you did in your personal life.
	The fuck has that got to do with guys who do lie detector tests and fucking...
	Because they're clearly liars.
	But they talked to Dr. Fauci about his gay vaccine.
	The Try Guys.
	Remember their fucking...
	I think they did even worse than you.
	It was pretty bad, right?
	If you can imagine.
	I can imagine.
	Try guys.
	Come on, try guys.
	Try guys test.
	We sit here while you Google.
	Or lack thereof.
	I like how they retitled it.
	That has to be like a title change.
	The try guys test who's most attractive.
	So what's the norm?
	I think 600 to 1,200, something like that.
	Oh, my God.
	Oh, no, it's actually a wider range, but I don't trust it.
	Oh, wow.
	The runner up for the most assault run is Kippie Pooh!
	There's so much stream in my blood.
	Number one.
	It's Fusionaya!
	Have you seen how heavy his legs are?
	Can we just talk about the soft racism of everybody being surprised?
	That yellow nigga.
	Yeah, actually, that's true.
	No, for real.
	They were all like, wait, what?
	What?
	Those guys?
	Don't they have small dicks?
	Like, he's even surprised.
	He's like, that's bullshit.
	And he's like, that goes against everything I've ever...
	I'm making origami.
	I think they're like, wow, I really am a pussy.
	Who actually crosses their fingers before some ew?
	Who actually?
	Have you seen how he is like her?
	I do have very much.
	Why did they hire a homo to be their fake scientist?
	Have you seen how hard it is, you guys?
	Daddy.
	You guys ready for number three?
	I don't even know.
	Very sexy.
	Daddy.
	That's not good.
	And the cheater is the lowest T. Don't worry, Ned.
	I really thought Ned would be number one.
	So no scientific data then.
	Ned the cheater has the lowest T. Correlates the level of testosterone to the level of attractiveness.
	The one who had a baby and approved.
	My pet Biden.
	2, 1,003, 1004, 1005.
	Biden.
	On him I can defend my pet.
	Biden.
	President.
	He's big and foolish sleepy.
	But a friendly monster too.
	My pet.
	Biden.
	Wait, what?
	That doesn't rhyme.
	We're up to a daily basis with Joe.
	We did, what, three or four pieces yesterday.
	That was 24 hours ago.
	Got plenty more.
	Isn't that nuts?
	Yeah.
	The president is creeping out the world on a daily basis.
	And I love to see women, girls going, don't, don't.
	Like that is really inspiring.
	I always tell my daughter, be a porcupine.
	Have your quills out.
	Don't trust anyone.
	Even some best pal.
	She might stab you in the back.
	Always just be on your haunches.
	I mean, it's it, the handy thing about being the founder of the Prowboys is I'm always wondering if you're a fed.
	So I relax, but I'm never 100% relaxed.
	I'm always, yeah, always wondering, what if this conversation was being recorded?
	100% of the time.
	Well, maybe not with Maddie and you, but basically, even with your wife, dude, I know she's not a fed, but you guys might get divorced.
	So if she freaks out and smashes a bunch of plates against the wall and tries to scratch your face off, record the scratches.
	Get it on tape.
	That was Alex Jones' advice to me.
	Say you have the best marriage in the world for 40 years and she goes nuts and starts smashing shit, record it.
	It could save you millions.
	Or would she record you saying N or something?
	Yeah.
	Make her delete it.
	Nigger delete it.
	But what I was saying to my daughter recently, I said, you got to watch out for the nice guys.
	We've been brainwashed.
	Like, what is it?
	16 Candles with Ducky?
	Yeah.
	Long Duck Dong?
	Yeah.
	No, no, Ducky, the fucking, the guy from Two and a Half Men.
	Was that 16 Candles?
	Yeah, 16 Candles was the gong.
	Yeah, there's the hunks.
	The hunks are bad news, and they're going to break your heart and shit on you.
	I think a lot of Trump derangement syndrome has to do with this trope of the cool Alpha Jock being the date rapist evil guy.
	We've all been raised, you know, especially those of us Gen Xers who grew up in liberal enclaves, to see the jock quarterback, the Duke La Crosse type, as the rapist.
	He's evil.
	And Ducky, if you could pull up Ducky, that would be great.
	As the fun sidekick no one loves, but he'd be the perfect husband if you'd only love him.
	And you go, that sounds like a nice trope.
	I like it.
	The guy that you think is the superstar is a jerk.
	And then you start getting older and you have like my buddy Sebastian.
	He was at this chick's house with his friend.
	They're both gorgeous hunks.
	And she wanted to institute a threesome.
	And then she got so nervous that she puked all over herself.
	That's the guy you got to worry about.
	Pretty and pink.
	The friend.
	Yeah, Pretty in Pink.
	All you gotta do is try I'll give you Yeah, yeah, yeah All you gotta You and me Hold up where you wanna Squeeze her Don't tease her Never leave her Get to the Da, da, da, da Or sweat socks with creepers.
	I wanted to talk to you about Andy, Bill.
	I mean, she's an incredible individual.
	I mean, you know that.
	I mean, I'm there for her.
	Whenever, however, that's what you got to watch for.
	You can rest assured that she's covered.
	I don't want you to worry.
	Anyway, so yeah, Sebastian, she's at her house.
	And what does he do?
	She starts projectile vomiting.
	Him and his hunk friend, they take her sheets off.
	They wash them.
	They get her in the bathtub.
	She finishes her puking there.
	They wash her.
	They wash the sheets.
	They dry her off.
	They throw her back down on the bare mattress.
	She's done her puking.
	They put a big salad bowl there.
	They finish the laundry.
	Well, at least they get it in the dryer.
	And they make sure she's okay, and then they're out of there.
	No one touched her gross puky tit.
	However, I know this other dude used to work at American Apparel Radio.
	And this chick was Asleep, wasted.
	And he's like, I'll take her.
	She'll be fine.
	So he takes her home or upstairs.
	And then he fucks her while she's barely coherent.
	And he had never been, he had been laid, but he was a total pussy.
	Chicks weren't into him.
	He looked like Ducky.
	He was a pussy.
	We couldn't prove it, of course.
	I would have killed him.
	And she didn't want to get into it, but she indicated it as much.
	And that's the pattern, folks.
	The nice guys are the rapists.
	The male feminists are the rapists.
	Actually, go to that tweet Andy Espresso put up today.
	Do you know Andy Espresso?
	Oh, I do.
	He put up a great video that summarizes this.
	Now, I'm not sure what this has to do with Joe Biden.
	He's a totally different thing.
	That's a disgusting global elitist pedophile who is neither the cool jock or the ducky nerdy boy, male feminist type.
	So it's kind of a separate topic.
	Now, how can you not find it?
	It was eight hours ago.
	Oh, that helps.
	Oh, there we go.
	That's pretty effing funny.
	Every father needs to send this to his daughter.
	Tell me you're a male feminist without telling me you're a male feminist.
	I'll start.
	So I have this friend, McKenna.
	Great girl.
	She was dating this guy named Tanner.
	Not a great guy.
	He would disrespect her.
	He would not treat her like the queen she was.
	He would cheat on her.
	Probably.
	Didn't have any direct evidence of that part, but I'm sure he did.
	And I would remind her of this daily.
	And finally, she broke up with him.
	So I'm hanging out with her after, and she goes, Cole, I wish I could find a guy just like you.
	So naturally, I made a move on her, and she rejected me.
	I'm like, excuse me?
	You wish you could find a guy just like me?
	Bitch, I am me.
	Hook up with me.
	I've been putting in the time.
	I deserve this.
	You owe me.
	I'm just going to keep going for the bad boys.
	Then you're going to keep getting your heart broken and you'll deserve it.
	You need to go for the good guys like me.
	Nice guys like me.
	Just give me a chance and let me show you how nice I am.
	I will be so much fucking nicer to you than the other guys.
	Just let me show you how fucking nice I can be.
	You stupid bitch.
	God damn it.
	Well.
	Get on, babe.
	Perfect.
	We're going, bro.
	Bob Dam Dane.
	Imagine what you'd be thinking.
	I hope you cut that as a drop.
	I have not yet.
	What?
	No time?
	No, I haven't.
	It's on my list of things, but I'll cut it.
	I can cut it now.
	Think about what you'd be thinking about.
	Nazi fags.
	We should sort of put those together in a My Pet Biden intro.
	We've got to make a montage of all this shit.
	There's so much good stuff there.
	Anyway, sorry.
	So off of a total tangent, beware of the beta males.
	Alpha males are not the rapists we're taught they are in movies, but this isn't really either of those things.
	This is a pedophile drunk with power creeping at a chick.
	And God, you got to hate it when the dads just tolerate it, or even the male friend, which I think this is.
	But I love to see a woman standing up for themselves, but I really love to see the fathers going, whoa, whoa, whoa.
	But they never do.
	They never do.
	So here's a woman standing up for herself.
	So this is actually a good news video.
	Thank you for being here.
	Hi, how are you?
	This is Anessa.
	We met before.
	It's hard to forget those eyes.
	Look at those eyes.
	Look at them.
	She just was the queen of the that is not surprising.
	Isn't that true?
	He didn't finish what he was saying.
	She's the queen of the edge.
	I just want to talk to her.
	This is the perfect age for me.
	Just like three pubes.
	That's my ideal.
	Not surprising.
	What are you doing now, kiddo?
	You're still in school?
	No, I just got out of school.
	I'm about to.
	Notice how articulate he is.
	Well, this was 07, I guess.
	Well, great, good for you.
	Three years she got her degree.
	Oh, that's what confused me because I met you before.
	Yeah.
	And I thought you still had more time in school.
	Nope.
	Yeah, well, you made it out, huh?
	Yes, I did.
	Well, wonderful.
	She's one of our steering committees.
	Well, that's great.
	Thank you.
	So is I nice to see you.
	It's hard to forget.
	That is so weird to see.
	Look at it.
	They replay it.
	Those eyes.
	It's hard to forget those eyes.
	It's hard to forget those eyes.
	Look at those eyes.
	Look at those.
	She just touched me, queen of the cabbage.
	Wonderful.
	She's one of our good to see you again.
	Thank you for being here.
	Hi, how are you?
	This is a NASA.
	So weird to see him talk.
	Yeah.
	Like he fucked up.
	He was like, oh, because I...
	Like, to save it.
	Yeah, he's a much better pedophile back then.
	You notice that he was like, I got to touch her.
	She doesn't like it.
	So I'm probably not going to get any pussy out of this.
	She's probably one of these blabber mouths that's going to wrap me out.
	So he touches her.
	He gets this.
	And pedophiles probably.
	They're like sharks, right?
	They don't go.
	That's why it works to punch a shark.
	They don't go for anyone that's going to be causing them any problems.
	They're looking for easy prey.
	So when she went like that, he went, nah, fuck.
	I could do some quick taps like here.
	Let me touch her.
	Any fatigue in here?
	No, this is probably not going to work.
	It's kind of like boxing.
	He's like, what's some ins I can get there?
	She's not defending her shoulders.
	I'll just rub here.
	I'm just a regular guy.
	I'm not a threat.
	I'm a sweetheart.
	But now that he's senile, he's like on his bike.
	There's a little girl.
	Hey, I want to smell you.
	Yeah.
	She doesn't like that.
	Fuck off.
	I'm smelling.
	Here's a great drop from Joe.
	2-1.
	Banged up by the Republicans, but come bring it on.
	Oh, I'm being banged up by the Republicans, but come bring it on.
	So that's a drop.
	Every time we make fun of him, you got to pull that up.
	Oh, I'm being made fun of by the Republicans, but come bring it on.
	He was going to say, I guess, but come on, man.
	Come on, man.
	Bring it on, man.
	Come on.
	And then everyone's talking about this new anti-Trump book that just came out, The Confidence Man, which is obviously the etymology of con man.
	And I saw it on CNN last night, lots of smoking guns.
	For example, Trump says a defining moment for him was when he went to Staten Island for the bridge that goes from Staten Island to Manhattan, and it was the inauguration of the bridge, and they never mentioned the engineer.
	So CNN pulls out this video of the engineer being mentioned as a haha, Trump was lying.
	And you're like, wait a minute, wait a minute.
	You didn't refute Trump.
	Trump's takeaway from his experience there was that the engineer didn't get enough attention.
	The fact that you found a news clip of someone giving the engineer attention doesn't refute Trump's experience there.
	But you should have seen this author.
	Oh my God.
	She has this sort of like, she's acting like Zeus.
	She was just like, yes, well, it's just another one of many examples of Trump's lies.
	It's what he does.
	It's his raison debt.
	And it'll continue to be what he does for a long time.
	Egg.
	So sick of women pretending to be something they're not.
	Like that interview that Weiss did with Kamala Harris.
	Remember that one?
	And the female journalist was all like, um, yes, would you find?
	And you're just like, stop playing house.
	You look ridiculous.
	Serious pants.
	Anyway, she's a fucking nightmare.
	But of course, everyone is gobbling this up.
	And I like seeing the BBC's take on the hottest parts of the book.
	So let's take all of these as true, okay?
	These key revelations.
	Trump wanted to fire Ivanka and Jared Kushner.
	Yeah, good.
	So did we.
	They never should have been in the White House.
	So that is good news.
	I'm very happy to hear that.
	And that's something they complained about.
	Yeah, it was nepotism.
	We didn't want them there.
	As Ann Coulter said, this is not a monarchy.
	I don't want the royal family in there.
	Number two, Trump Wade bombing drug labs in Mexico.
	Good.
	Happy to hear it.
	That's a great idea.
	They're helping fentanyl.
	I guess fentanyl comes from China, but they are linked to the fentanyl industry.
	Are they?
	Actually, I have no idea what I'm talking about.
	Does any fentanyl come from Mexico?
	Or does it get just traffic there, right?
	Siri, does any fentanyl come from Mexico?
	Mexico's role in the deadly rise of fentanyl.
	China produces the mass the majority, but Mexico is becoming a major transit and production point for the drug and its analogs as well.
	And Mexican traffickers appear to be playing a role in its distribution in the United States.
	So that sounds reasonable to me.
	I don't understand what the problem is there.
	Trump was scared of dying from COVID-19.
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	Didn't you try to scare us?
	What is he, 78?
	If I'm 78 and I have COVID, I'm going to be concerned.
	And the whole narrative was that it's deadly.
	So that's the media's role in that.
	Wait, what are you talking about?
	Conservatives were the ones saying that it's not a deadly disease, it's bullshit.
	And they're saying Trump was scared from dying for COVID-19.
	You're the one who scared everybody else.
	The left scared everybody thinking that you could.
	Oh, I see what you're saying.
	So liberals should go, yeah.
	Yeah.
	You should be scared.
	Why wouldn't he be scared?
	It's a deadly disease.
	So we're still at zero.
	We're at zero for three.
	Trump mentioned his property in UKPM meeting.
	What?
	With Teresa May, he said, some people are pro-life, some people are pro-choice.
	Imagine if some animals with tattoos raped your daughter and she got pregnant.
	He then changed the subject in a conversation on Northern Island to discuss how to block an offshore wind project from being set up near his property.
	Wow.
	That is some controversy.
	So he didn't want wind turbines on his property or next to his property.
	And then he presented an argument for abortion.
	Whoa.
	Hot stuff.
	Trump asked Juliani to do anything to overturn the 20.
	Trump was convinced, like you and I, that the election was stolen.
	So he told Juliani to pull out all the stops and do anything you have to do to expose this fraud, not to invent it.
	Number six, Trump came up with taxes excuse on the fly.
	Good.
	Trump flushed documents down a White House toilet.
	This one is so annoying.
	He would take little hand notes and he didn't want anyone to see them.
	You could shred them if you want, but we've seen shredding be reassembled.
	So he would drop them in the toilet, wait until they became flushable, and then flush them.
	Good.
	What a dumb thing to be concerned about.
	Trump thought ethnic minority staffers were waiters.
	Oh my God.
	How dare he?
	How dare he in a room full of black waiters think that another guy in a black guy in his suit was one of them.
	Yeah, have you been to a Pelosi party?
	are.
	Ha ha ha.
	Ha ha ha.
	I don't think I know why.
	Ha ha ha.
	All right, let's do a brief feminism.
	I wish feminism was brief.
	Am I right, guys?
	Yeah.
	Who here identifies as a feminist?
	We are the storm, the very form of change that the world has been waiting for.
	You said I was too pretty to fight.
	That's toxic masculinity if you don't realize how your behavior is hurtful.
	Remember when I got knocked out in Oakland, I came back to my gym, which at the time was Church Street Boxing Gym.
	The old Puerto Rican man was there, like, what are you doing?
	Why are you fighting?
	Guys like us, we're too pretty to fight.
	Here's some women playing soccer, which is shocking to see.
	I've noticed that about all women's sports, except volleyball.
	They are fucking good at volleyball.
	And of course, gymnastics.
	I love watching gymnastics.
	I love watching women do what they're good at.
	They have a lower Center of gravity.
	They're fucking amazing.
	And when you watch women doing gymnastics, you're watching something where it's not obvious men could do better.
	In fact, I don't think they can.
	That Japanese chick, I almost cried watching her.
	I saw some other black chick fucking nail it the other day.
	This is not amazing.
	Look, the ball didn't even go in.
	They're all down.
	They're at 100% down.
	I'm sorry, there was volume to this video.
	Let's see.
	Look, down, down, down, and down.
	Why did she go down?
	And why do they stay down?
	To get a flag, right?
	You really want to sell those injuries?
	Wow.
	And the last one bailed.
	The ball didn't go in.
	There's no reason to bail.
	It was on the other side of the net.
	Now, these are emails.
	You've got to find the email crazy Facebook group where these girls are really enthusiastic about not having kids.
	Okay.
	So I assume you'll be working all night at the hospital, saving lives as an oncologist in ER.
	I guess you're better off doing that.
	I guess you'll be traveling the world and sailing across the Atlantic and other things that you can't do with kids.
	So I guess you'll be kicking ass and taking names.
	And me as a guy who thinks women should be housewives and thinks that women should have kids and thinks that there should be more American families, I'll be watching this and I'll be green with envy and I'll realize I'm wrong because all these women are fucking rocking.
	So let's watch some ladies rock out with no stupid kids in the way.
	Finally, freedom.
	So how do most of you child-free women spend your free time after work?
	I like to take naps, walk around Target, the 99 cent store, Nordstrom Rack, and workout.
	That sounds great.
	By the way, you can do all of those things with kids.
	I can't read that.
	I don't think now I can.
	Go lower.
	I'm a proud cat mom of this beautiful and rather large boy, Monty.
	It's amazing because he can go to the toilet all on his own.
	I don't need to wipe his bum.
	He doesn't scream at night.
	And I don't have to physically put food in his mouth for him to eat.
	You have to put food in kids'mouths for like...
	How old is she now?
	A year?
	She's 11 months.
	She's going to be 12 months on the 5th of November.
	And do you have to spoon feed her still?
	Some things like couscous, but we'll just put shredded chicken in front of her.
	She'll eat it.
	Okay, so we're already done with the putting the spoon.
	She eats on her own, yeah.
	And the screaming at night, how's that coming along?
	She does not do that.
	She rolls around a little bit, and then Caroline gives her some milk, and then she goes to bed.
	Okay, let's get back to the list.
	You have to wipe her bum?
	Yes, there's still the wet wipes.
	Twice a day, maybe three days.
	Twice a day, it takes what?
	A couple times a day, but six, seven seconds?
	Yeah, it's quick.
	And for some reason, your baby's shit doesn't stink.
	Other babies' shit stinks, but your own baby's shit doesn't stink.
	I don't know what that is about.
	It doesn't stink up your house.
	Like when you walk into somebody's house who has cats, you're like, ooh, there's a cat house.
	Yeah, our new rabbit, Josie, if that cage is not cleaned like twice a day, not twice a day, sorry, every two or three days, it gavs to have reeks.
	And I give them shit because I didn't want that fucking rabbit.
	You never walk in a house, you're like, ooh, we got babies?
	Ew, gross.
	Yeah, you don't smell them.
	But you sure do with cats.
	And you sure do with lots of pets.
	Their piss is so strong smelling, too.
	These cats.
	Oh, my God.
	It feels like it would melt your skin.
	Wait, going in the toilet all his own and wipe his bum, it's kind of the same thing.
	Me and my boyfriend don't want kids and never will.
	Quite frankly, we are big kids ourselves, sleeping in, being idiots together, and we can go out whenever we like.
	And Monty will just happily take a nap.
	Yeah, because your cat doesn't need much from you.
	It's not a thing.
	It's not domesticated, by the way.
	Someone was criticizing me.
	Look it up.
	Cats are not domesticated.
	If they were six feet tall, they would eat you.
	If Clifford was six feet tall or if Clifford existed, he wants to be your pal.
	Yeah.
	I like how I like thinking of this cat as Uncle Monty instead of just Monty.
	He's like, I'm preparing myself to lick my ass.
	Boy.
	I know you're awake, boy.
	But look that up.
	Cats are not domesticated.
	Totes?
	I have childlike spirit.
	By the way, what kid doesn't want a mom with childlike spirit?
	That just means they'll play with you more.
	I have childlike spirit, so I like things that get labeled as kid stuff.
	Legos, coloring, Disney movies.
	Kids are the worst at spoiler alerts because it's the first thing out of their mouths when they see a movie.
	But you will have seen it with the kid.
	Is this a joke, dude?
	I hurried up and watched Hocus Pocus 2, JJC.
	Just in case.
	Oh, just in case I see any nieces, nephews.
	I would seriously lose my shit if they spoiled it for me.
	They weren't even around for the OG.
	So Hocus Pocus 2 has more meaning for us 90s kids.
	Oh, my God.
	Actually, you probably shouldn't have kids.
	You should consider killing yourself.
	Yeah, that genealogy should stop right there.
	That's the end of that.
	Sorry.
	This Facebook group should be called People Who Need to Kill Themselves.
	Are Cats Domesticated?
	Well, that's a whole question there.
	So that doesn't count.
	It's probably a list I could tell.
	It's a scientific study that came up that said they're not domesticated.
	Anyway, keep going.
	Smithsonian.
	There we go.
	Smithsonian.
	That's also another whole thing, but the theory is that they domesticated us, essentially, right?
	No, the theory is that they'd love to kill us.
	Anyway, go back.
	Is that it for the Facebook group?
	Oh, I got to read this one.
	It feels good knowing I'm not alone in the struggles of being an adult who doesn't want children, blah, blah, blah.
	Basically pushed into our brains.
	Yeah, that's it.
	It's society conditioning you.
	It's nothing, it's not genetic.
	Yeah, because, you know, all that media around when like our ancestors without media were fucking to make them babies?
	I'm also really glad to see the pet parents out there love their fur babies, which is why I've come to Post.
	I have an ESA emotional support animal who is a one-eyed, one-eared cat that feels my anxiety and uses pressure and his purring to soothe my anxiety.
	Lately, my friends and their two toddlers have been staying with us.
	By the way, you can have cats and kids at the same time.
	I've heard screaming and yelling and tensions to the point that I simply walked away because I was ready to go break down.
	Gone for two hours, tried to eat.
	Anxiety spiked and I was feeling nauseated.
	Maybe your anxiety comes from the fact that you've rejected everything traditional and have no direction in life.
	You've rejected God, family, a future, and your instincts are kicking in.
	It's actually pretty natural that you're feeling anxiety.
	It's kind of a gift from God, that anxiety.
	It's a wake-up call.
	I was able to eat.
	I wasn't able to stop shaking.
	Blah, blah, fucking blah.
	Wow.
	This is why I prefer cats over kids.
	How would you know you've never tried?
	Again, though, I'm starting to think you shouldn't have.
	That's your soul you're holding in your hand.
	Does that name, her name kind of insinuate that she didn't want to fully take her husband's name?
	Oh, yeah.
	Or maybe her parents were that gay?
	All right, that's enough of that.
	And here's some white girls picking fights with African Americans.
	Like, this is one of the problems with saying you can kick ass, ladies.
	You're a rock star.
	I want to be a rock star.
	It's called What is With These White Girls?
	Oh, yes.
	Like, as I'm sitting there telling my daughter to be wary of everyone, but especially the male feminist nice guy, I also want to tell my daughter, if there's a big brawl going on, you're not, and my daughter boxes.
	You're not good enough as a fighter.
	I've seen you.
	You haven't even sparred yet.
	You're not good enough as a fighter to go in and start taking out random black dudes.
	But this girl is just like, I'm throwing down, motherfucker.
	And random black dudes have no problem kicking the shit out of you.
	Yeah!
	Put them in the end.
	Stomp them in the head.
	Look, then she shows up.
	So they throw her down like that.
	Stomp on her head.
	Kick her.
	She wants some, then punch her.
	Now she wants some more.
	She just got it again.
	She's definitely concussed there.
	And again.
	You're watching someone get their wake-up call.
	They always say there's men before they're punched in the face and men when they're after they're punched in the face.
	I think we just saw a girl go through that.
	They weren't meant to.
	That wasn't our design.
	But just like that guy at the beginning, getting plowed by the Rams, getting rammed by the Rams, she just got rebooted.
	Her hard drive just got a new operating system, and it's, don't fuck around because you don't want to find out again.
	Think about what you'd think about at the time.
	No, no, not at the time.
	Oh, we want that gun?
	Yeah, yeah.
	Think about what you'd think about.
	Obviously.
	Hey, they edited us to make us look worse.
	Why can't we have revenge?
	All right, let's get to the fucking Mailbrian shut up, you don't have a dad.
	Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag.
	Let me touch it.
	Doodle doodle.
	Working on a show with Isabelle O'Reilly, I'll have you know, where she discusses her streeters.
	Very excited about that.
	Holy crap, we get a lot of mail.
	I cannot stay on top of it.
	So Laundry Gate is back.
	I've told you about this before.
	I've been accused of repeating the story.
	No, it's an ongoing controversy in my home where I think my son is doing extra laundry so he can have certain shirts.
	Why don't you just buy him doubles of his favorite clothing?
	You're annoying.
	And you don't have sisters.
	During yesterday's show, you and Ryan brought up the subject of opiate-induced constipation.
	Of all the horrors of being a heroin addict, nothing is worse than this.
	The red-faced, blood vessel-bursting, straining to no avail.
	Oh.
	Hello?
	Hi, good morning.
	Shoe repair shop.
	Oh, yeah, shoe repair shop.
	Yeah, your bus is there, so also get it, please.
	Okay, I'll come to get it.
	Okay, see you.
	Bye-bye.
	Okay, bye.
	That guy is crazy overpriced, but crazy good.
	My red wings were hurting me, and I said, it must be the base.
	No, you people, you get it.
	And I said, why don't you tear out the insoles and put in these Chuck Taylor insoles?
	Is that possible?
	No, you can't change an insol.
	Why are you crazy?
	And I said, well, if I put insoles in, there's no room.
	Yeah, no room.
	Meanwhile, he has these weird slippers on that are just like a slab with a strap.
	And he's a shoe expert.
	Slab strap.
	He's just got a slap strap on.
	And I go, slap strap.
	He's just got slap straps on.
	Why are you telling me about my red wings when all you're wearing is fucking slap straps?
	You got slap strap.
	Fucking slap strap, tell me how to fucking live my life.
	He goes, no, the problem is it's so tight.
	And that's where your feet hurt.
	You get insoles, you have even less room.
	So what I do, I stretch out.
	Stretch it out right here, right on the knuckles.
	I stretch it out.
	$48.
	These are $250 boots, and now it's $50 to have them stretched.
	Almost totaled.
	I did it.
	And Knock on wood.
	It's been working out pretty great.
	Donald Trump don't trust China.
	China is asshole.
	So I took my turduckens in.
	My Nike turduckens.
	Oh, you got those.
	Nice.
	Those hurt too.
	And it obviously can't be the soul.
	So I thought maybe I'm wide-footed.
	And that's another $20.
	Those shoes probably cost me, I don't know, $120 or something.
	Do you know the turducken?
	Oh, I know.
	They're going for some dollar bills these days.
	No, they're not.
	$194?
	$329.
	Yeah, $194.
	I think men can wear those, grown men.
	They're pretty cool.
	There's some controversy on can men wear fancy Nikes.
	I'm going to go with yes.
	But when they're really over-the-top, expensive, it looks fucking gay on a 52-year-old.
	I also got some Thoroughgoods coming either today or tomorrow.
	Pull those up.
	Black Thoroughgoods.
	They're even nicer than Red Wings.
	And I think they're made in America.
	All part of my blue-collar chic.
	All these boys?
	Yeah, but not the ones that are too intense.
	Those are nice.
	But I like the slightly lower ones.
	Those are almost there.
	I tried to get browns.
	I don't know.
	There's something about brown shoes.
	I just can't do it.
	Anyway.
	Fun stuff, fun looks.
	We'll be doing a whole video on those fun looks.
	So this guy's getting back to his turd.
	The compact turd is stuck at the threshold of your an ellipse, but the laws of physics will permit that turd to go no further.
	Remember, I was at a Tommy Robinson thing when he's getting sentenced to prison.
	Some junkie, Antifa, threw a football of shit at us.
	It was this big.
	It hit the floor, and I could see the days of the week on it.
	Tuesday, Wednesday, all different shades.
	Like a tree ring.
	Like a tree ring.
	The only thing worse than the realization that they're going to have to go in after it is the act itself.
	The trick is to wedge your finger at the rim of the butt lip and hook it around the rock turd, forcing it out.
	Holy shit.
	I used to call it fishing for river rocks.
	Dude.
	Or more simply, please, God, just let me die.
	Been clean for five years now and get to be a father to my son.
	Life is good, but sadly, my ass still looks like chewed bubblegum.
	Love you gays more than friends or huru faggots.
	Dude, if you've been clean for five years, I think it would be okay to just have a little toot of heroin.
	No, no, that's bad.
	You're not going to get wasted.
	Just have a beer and just have two beers and then just have three beers and then maybe a bump of Coke.
	And then to wind down after all that, when it's bedtime, just do one little tiny bit of heroin.
	It's not going to kill you.
	I think it's addicting.
	It would start a pattern all of addicting?
	Addictive.
	Addictive.
	That offended me worse than that guy Odean.
	I know it doesn't really matter, but Steve will do it as one of the Nelk Boys.
	He's part of the podcast that interviewed Trump and got millions of views until YouTube took it down after a couple days.
	They're big-time Trump guys.
	Oh.
	So the shirt was a joke.
	Aha.
	Okay.
	Well, he's got one of the hottest women in the world, and he's pro-Trump, Nelk Boy.
	That all sounds pretty cool.
	I just, the bragging about the Cars thing was pretty fucking cringe.
	Was that a joke?
	You'll have to watch yesterday's episode to see what we're talking about.
	It's good that you finally admitted you don't like Putin.
	This is the first true enemy the world has had for a long time.
	The guy is pure evil and almost on par with Hitler.
	Well, that's an adventurous analogy.
	The reason the USA is giving Ukraine all the military aid is so we, the West, don't have to sacrifice our soldiers' lives to defeat them.
	The end result will be more countries joining NATO, which requires them to be less corrupt and contribute spending on defense.
	It makes us more powerful and China weaker.
	The Ukrainians are the ones paying the real cost in lives and destruction.
	We really shouldn't be trading with any dictatorship or communist countries, including China.
	We should be developing our own industries at home to diversify our economies and using our allies for trade.
	I mentioned this yesterday.
	Doesn't it feel kind of weird?
	Like, we want the truth of who fucked up this pipeline.
	And I've been like, yeah, we did it.
	It looks like we did it.
	I think we did it.
	And then I'm like, why are we so quick to rat on our own country?
	Like, I know that it's fucked up.
	And it's almost if you're in a household and your dad like shit on your neighbor's yard and then you run out and you're like, my dad did it.
	Why are you ratting on your...
	Isn't it kind of a weird impulse where we want to expose the truth, but we also like.
	But it depends.
	I mean, I'm not talking to Russia.
	I'm talking to my friends.
	They're going to hear it though.
	And I guess I should run cover for America and go, yeah, Russia did the pipeline.
	That's not really my job, though.
	But I think the end result is maybe we get neked.
	Neeked?
	Nuked.
	Nuked.
	I don't like saying it, so I say neked.
	You don't like saying the word nuked, so you say neked, and people are just supposed to know that?
	They could figure it out.
	Context clues.
	Context clues.
	Yeah, I think the result of us exposing the fact that, yes, we did do it is very bad.
	So even though we might be pro-Russia in that sense, we're like we did a bad thing to them, should we really be telling everybody that we did that?
	It feels weird.
	Whatever happened to the hot sauce?
	I understand there would be four or five new hot sauces coming out a week or two ago, and you haven't said shit or crap about it.
	Yeah, whatever happened to that?
	Good question, dude.
	Our sales guy is a fucking tard.
	I think they're making it.
	Like, I follow them on Twitter, and they're making a big batch of stuff.
	There's a lot of peppers involved.
	I always say fire him, and then he's fired.
	Then the next thing you know, I get an email from him, hey, tonight we're doing the fucking.
	What?
	That's smart.
	How are you still here?
	That is a smart way to go about things.
	Here, the boot I got is the American Heritage 6-inch Mock Toe Safety.
	You've got to see this thing.
	It's a real work of art.
	Should I text it to you?
	I got it.
	Wait.
	Mock Toe Safety.
	You don't got it.
	What was the first part?
	Thoroughgood.
	Thoroughgood.
	T-H-O-R-O Good.
	Mock Toe Safety Boop.
	Oh, here's another thing.
	I'll I'll mention this in the Thingamadoodle.
	Where is it?
	Is that Is that in the middle?
	No, no, no.
	Go back up to the top.
	There, there.
	No, right there.
	Not here, but this one next to it.
	That one, yeah.
	White sole?
	Yeah, of course.
	What was the white sole?
	Look at that masterpiece.
	Isn't that a beautiful boot?
	It's a beautiful boot.
	I've always said that white Chuck Taylor is the most beautifully designed shoe in the world, but this is close second.
	I think I like it better than Red Wings.
	We'll see how they feel.
	But good trick.
	These white soles, they fucking deplete like pancakes.
	So you really need that little plastic, liver-shaped thing, kidney-shaped thing, that goes on the back heel.
	Because the whole thing about like with Red Wings, oh, they're a lifetime guarantee.
	You just send them in and they patch it up for nothing.
	Well, yeah, the shipping is like 80 bucks.
	And I think they charge you a base fee of like 20 bucks.
	So it ends up being $100.
	If you use the plastic thing, you don't need it.
	Plus, most cobblers have a very similar soul, and they'll do it for much cheaper.
	Watching the Monday Night Show fix the fucking sound levels.
	I don't know.
	Were the sound levels bad?
	Monday.
	Let me see.
	Monday.
	I put my regular processing on it.
	Dynamics processing.
	I don't know.
	I don't know.
	Every time I hear things like this episode's skipping or something, I go and check it and it's not and I realize it's you, dude.
	Somebody messed with us and they said that the dates were wrong on the tour shirt.
	And I freaked out and I checked it.
	And it's not.
	It's not.
	Alright, let's get to the final video.
	So So I'm going to start selling these on the site for Max and John.
	$10 each signed.
	Wasn't my idea.
	Some viewers said that.
	What do you think?
	I think that's righteous.
	Will they sell?
	Will they sell?
	Here's a video of a woman, and when I look at it, I'm just reminded at how unflattering some clothes can be.
	Because you think she's just a fat tub of shit when you look at her in that dress.
	And then when the geyser disrobes her, NSFW, by the way, nudity coming, you realize that she's got an amazing body.
	Actually, kind of perfect for my tastes.
	I like a bit of meat on the bone.
	The kits almost came out.
	This screaming really helps, though.
	Can you freeze it frame by frame?
	Look at that waist.
	Really comes in there.
	And then some fat thighs.
	Ripple tits.
	And then those ripply tits dancing around.
	All right, folks.
	Tomorrow, of course, is Aunt and Gav shooting the shit for three hours.
	You can't complain that we do too much politics when Aunt and Gav shoot the shit for three hours.
	Not that we give a fuck about complaints or comments.
	Don't get the wrong idea.
	We're here.
	We're queer.
	Get used to it.
	Get fired.
	Get in trouble.
	Be brave.

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