All Episodes
July 8, 2022 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes
02:30:25
S4EP139 - WE'RE TAKING HOLLYWOOD
| Copy link to current segment

Time Text
Live from New York, it's Get Off My Long with Devin Gibbon.
That's the partisans.
I think they're from Wales.
Punk band late 70s, early 80s.
40 years old today.
That song is 40 years old today.
What the fuck?
I remember them when I was a little kid.
When I was a 10-year-old.
They had a chick in the band.
And the cool thing about punk with chicks was it was like a don't ask, don't tell.
Like, they rewrite punk history and they go, X-Ray Specs were the first band or what's that other?
Vice Squad.
Vice Squad had a female singer and she was breaking new ground and no one had done that yet.
And you're like, no one gave a fuck that Wendy O. Williams of the Plasmatics was female.
It wasn't a thing.
It's just like fucking Bruce Springsteen and Barack Obama going, you know, Clarence Clemens up on that stage.
You know, they're all cheering for him, and those same people be calling him the N-word in the local bar.
You're from Hawaii, dude.
You don't understand America.
Fuck you.
But I was thinking that too, because Vice was seen as a place of toxic masculinity.
And it wasn't ever that.
When I was there, the roots were punk rock.
So the chicks were like part of the gang.
What's one too?
Is that a picture of them?
Oh, yeah.
Go to the next one.
Luis, that was her name, the bassist.
Look up pictures of them, the partisans.
And it was just like chicks were around.
There wasn't, you know, it wasn't like grabbing asses or anything.
Everyone was cool with each other because that was the punk scene.
That's what it was like.
And then they went woke and started having trans rules and everything.
Yeah, that's a good picture of them on the left.
And that's when they got called toxic masculinity.
Because when you invite these demons into your home, they start destroying your home.
So the more woke you get, the more you get accused of racism and sexism.
Because you have these affirmative action hires who are there based on their race and their gender and their sexual preference.
So what are they going to do?
Make everything about race, gender, and sexual preference.
And that's boring.
Just so you know.
Like that guy I had a fight with upstate who stormed, literally ran out of the restaurant.
I was talking to someone else about it the next day because it was the hottest gossip in town, very small town, Berryville, New York.
And he said, I don't know, it's his problem.
He thinks the Prowboys are homophobic or something.
And I'm like, faggots have got to come to terms with the fact that we don't care about you.
Sorry.
It's not a phobia.
It's an apathy.
It's a total lack of care.
Okay?
Well, that is a very unfortunate situation.
Lose that mouse.
I was going to do the Viagra Boys.
They just released their new album 17 hours ago.
So 12 hours ago, one in the...
So, yeah.
In the morning.
Who fucking cares?
But it's...
They're one of the greatest bands.
We're really living in a zenith time.
If I was like a DJ right now, I would be very excited about my job.
Especially if I was an Australian DJ.
These guys are whatever they are, Swedish or something.
But the quality is just amazing.
And the amazing thing about music is, how do you keep coming up with new shit?
Like with painting, I think it's kind of done, right?
We've done every kind of painting we can have.
And you'd think the same would be true of like rock or punk or whatever this is.
But no, it just keeps getting more awesome.
I'm the only person in my neighborhood with tattoos.
I don't mean like this many tattoos.
I mean any tattoos.
And that's never been the case.
From 1988 to when I moved to the Burbs in 2015, I always had like the normal amount of tattoos compared to people around me.
And then one day, boom, you're a circus freak.
In the news, James Kahn is dead.
Front page of the post.
I don't really give a shit when old celebrities die.
I'm like, you had a good run.
You were an elf and the godfather.
Bye.
Bye-bye.
And I don't give a fuck about this guy being killed because he was a psychotic asshole career criminal who attacked this innocent old Dominican man because he didn't give away free food, free chips, which is...
That's the way it works.
I just saw this woman who's actually going to be in racism, but talk about black people behaving badly.
This is 3-3.
She goes to get a burrito.
She's a fat hippopotamus of a woman, so she devours it in one bite.
And then she comes back and goes, that was gross.
I want a new one.
And they go, well, give us the one you don't like.
Like, I could shit it out.
I already ate it.
They go, well, we can't just give you a new one.
And if it's gross, why do you want another one?
And she goes, fuck you.
Starts screaming at them.
None of them speak English, by the way.
Every time I see these things, like the fry one we were talking about yesterday, we showed that on Compound, right?
With the girls trashing the fry place.
We showed that on this show, too.
Oh, yeah.
I'm just like, pepper spray.
I know you don't want to punch it.
But if you could just give her a dose.
What if you had an item in your store that everybody carried that's a hot sauce?
And it just so happens to aerosol spray out.
And then that's your way of getting around.
It's not pepper spray, it's pepper sauce.
They're obviously going to use that on you when they're losing their shit and trashing the joint, Ryan.
No, no, no, you wouldn't have it.
That's only for the chef.
Okay, well, just get pepper spray.
That sounds a little easier.
No.
But here's some really bad news.
And I do care about this.
He was only 67.
Shinzo Abe, the prime minister of Japan, their longest-running prime minister, shot with a gun.
What?
But Japan has the strictest gun laws in the world.
They don't have guns there.
It's an island.
They don't let guns in.
Yeah, he made one with duct tape and fucking firecrackers.
Look at this terrible Secret Service.
There's the second one.
They got him.
He's dying now.
Look, the Secret Service didn't even put down their briefcase.
Look, he's holding...
Two Secret Service guys are holding onto their briefcases.
That's pathetic.
How did this guy get so close to the Prime Minister?
And why didn't they tackle him the second they heard the shot?
Look.
Look.
Did you see that?
One of them's just holding up his briefcase.
That's helping.
Look at that.
World's worst secret service.
Holy fuck.
Ancient Chinese secret service.
I saw...
Jack Bisobic was saying, the secret service in America is so overtrained that they practice water combat.
So if you're in a plane and it crashes and there's terrorists on jet skis who show up to kill you, you can fight them from the water.
But this obviously was reminiscent of Otoya Yamaguchi.
That was the talk I did where we celebrated this assassination and all my friends went to jail because Antifa showed up and they beat them up.
And you're not allowed to beat up the DNC's paramilitary wing.
No, not allowed.
But Ryan played the part of that socialist that we just saw get stabbed.
And I was Otoya Yamaguchi.
Now, why is one assassination funny and the other sad?
Because the guy you just showed in black and white isn't a person.
He's a communist.
So it's okay to kill communists.
It's not okay to kill Shinzo-Abe because he was one of our greatest allies when it comes to fighting communism.
There we are.
I'm wearing chinky glasses.
Even like BuzzFeed and Daily Beast, they were mad about the glasses.
He wore racist glasses.
They're fucking comedy glasses, guys.
Relax.
But yeah, that guy was Japanese saying Yahoo because communism is an evil force that Japan has managed to hold back.
I mean, it does have a lot of socialist policies.
The murderers have to make their own guns.
But you're up against China.
China.
And China is asshole.
So if Japan can hold back China for that long, it's commendable.
And he did.
What a great ally.
What a sad loss.
Go back to the original New York Post article.
You can see the gun he made.
It's bizarre looking.
No, up.
No, down, down, down, down, down, yep, yep, yep.
No, up, up, up, nope, up, no, that's down, that's down.
Up, up, yep.
A little more, a little more.
Stop, duck, duck, duck, dump, duck, duck.
Made his own crude musket style gun.
Homemade gun.
So apparently gun laws don't work after all.
Look at that fucking thing.
That's like the kind of thing my son would make back before he became a baseball zombie and he was creative.
Before he got his gun.
So all we know is this is a disgruntled vet.
But just a lunatic.
Here's something fun.
I have not watched this yet.
I wanted to watch it with the baby monsters together.
Oh, speaking of baby monsters, I have a great name for our comedy tour.
We've already used it, but it's called Cognitive Dissidence.
Not dissonance, dissidents.
You have to see it.
But we are like dissidents of the brain.
We are thought criminals.
So that'll be the name of the tour.
Setting up the New York dates now.
Really hoping no one gets arrested at those.
Yeah, so Tucker Carlson was on with this guy.
He was the editor of BuzzFeed, and then the New York Times scooped him up because BuzzFeed and the New York Times have become the same thing.
You're going to find this hard to believe, but this man is not gay.
He's an Upper West Side Jew from New York City who's born with a silver spoon, gone to all the Ivy League schools, and he's typical of the New York elites when it comes to his demeanor.
And that can be very low T. This man is actually not gay, which I know.
You're going to find this hard to believe.
So he thought he'd take on Tucker Carlson, who is one of the straightest people in the world.
Talking about black hair.
Remember we were talking about the crown rule and how black women had to fight just for the right to grow their own hair because they keep getting fired for hairdos?
No, you keep getting told you can't have a clown head.
And someone pointed out, yeah, Tucker Carlson, when he went to Fox, where was he before that?
CNN or something?
They made him cut his hair because it was too long.
it didn't look professional.
We all got parameters.
I'm wearing a fucking thing choking me here.
By the way, this suit is Anita Fashions linen suit.
I wore it yesterday to a getter rooftop party, sun beating down.
Wore it today, running errands.
It could not be more breathable.
You can kind of see my tattoos a little bit if you really look, but my nipples.
But this linen in the summer is a god.
Whoever invented that, I would like to give you 40 bucks.
You are a god, sir.
Thank you for inventing linen.
It's fucking awesome.
Sorry, that's 17 tangents.
It's just before we show you that you can't cuck the tuck.
Tucker.
Wow.
Nice closet.
Ladies and gentlemen.
And I'm glad you agreed to join us.
Someone just texted me and said you were pretty tough with Taylor Lorenz, which I was heartened to hear, but it's easy to hurt her feelings.
So I hope you'll check.
I'm just hoping you'll let me ask questions and not steamroll me because you're a professional and I'm not.
You're a tough one, Ben.
But I have been watching your show a lot, and you spend a lot of time laughing about labels that are thrown at you.
Can you stop?
Racist, white.
So this is, and Chris Plant was talking about this this morning.
This is the when did you stop beating your wife thing.
So I'm going to come across as totally objective and innocent and just say white supremacist, white nationalist, replacement theory, racist, most racist thing in the world.
But it's in an interrogative.
It's just a question.
I'm not saying anything.
This is what other people say.
I'm not saying it.
You've been perceived as a rapist, a child molester, someone who fucks kids in the ass.
What do you say to those allegations?
Are they true?
At that point, you just fight the guy, right?
Well, that would be more objective because you're like, is that true?
They would usually be like, so when you fuck kids, how do you do it?
How do you feel?
No, I think he does like the, is that true?
Are you really a Nazi?
That's fair.
Supremacist, the most host of the most racist show in the history of cable television.
Actually, I'd rather not ask you about the labels, but sort of give you an opportunity to talk about.
Did you see that?
So you've been called the host of the most racist show in the history of television.
But I don't want to get into that.
I just want to make sure it's on the record.
Like, if this was in a courtroom, they would strike that from the...
Objection, Your Honor.
What you believe.
And to begin with, do you believe white people are superior to other races?
No, of course not.
Stop.
And the funny thing is...
You know what's funny about that question is that's what they think we are.
They think we are one-drop Klansmen.
In other words, we want America to be 100% white.
We want all of the races to leave.
And by all of the races, we mean anyone who even has the slightest Lebanese name.
Ryan's got to go.
They believe that about us.
And then they mock us for that.
So they'll have some like ugly hillbilly and they'll go, yeah, superior race, my ass.
This is who they think is beautiful and smarter than fucking Halle Berry.
You're like, you're strawman.
Straw man, folks.
White supremacy.
It's so, remember that children's book that said many a hundred years ago or whatever, many hundreds of years ago, white people came up with the concept of race, and they decided they were better looking and smarter than the other races.
Yeah, three people think that.
Go ahead.
Let me just stop with the yes-no question there, and just to put it a little differently before you respond, which is do you think that white people have more of a claim to be superior in any way?
Do you think that white people have some claim on America that people of other races don't?
Of course not.
I mean, first of all, I'm a Christian, so I think God made everybody, and therefore everyone has equal value in his eyes.
That's the essential value of every person is that.
This is the problem with this moron's fucking reasoning.
American citizens have more claim to America than immigrants do.
That's a fact.
And when we say American citizens, we are also, there is also a bias to cultural Westerners.
So, if there is a second generation American named Rajiv Shabad, he has more claim on this country than a white Russian who just moved here and speaks with an accent.
Than his parents even, to some degree.
Why?
Because he was born here.
If his parents immigrated.
Sure, right.
Yeah, so his parents should go back to India?
No, but they have more claim.
They're more American.
No, they've been here longer, Ryan.
Can you please stop interrupting the show with your garbage ideas?
Jesus, age Christ.
So the problem with this guy is he hears that.
He doesn't hear the Rajiv Russian analogy.
And he goes, well, he says Americans have more of a claim on this than, say, illegal Mexicans.
The first group is predominantly white.
The second group is all Mexican.
Therefore, you're a white supremacist and you think whites are better and they deserve more.
It's junior high logic.
No, the fact that the majority of Americans happen to be white is not the argument.
The argument is it's America first.
And America includes legal assimilated Americans of all races.
If 60 to 70% of them are white, that's not the point.
That's irrelevant.
Drop it, you fucking losers.
And this guy is well-educated.
His dad's a judge.
Like he's been, he's overeducated in a sense, and he has that kind of a shit for brains.
But the idea that I harbor some sort of deep racial animus is like, I mean, I think there are a lot of criticisms you could level at me.
I think sometimes I overstate the case, I get pissed, I can be very nasty.
You've been on the receiving end of that.
I know you can vouch for that.
But the idea that I'm a, you know, that I, I mean, if you were to look at my texts or listen to my personal conversations or read my mind, you would find no instance where I'm like, I'm mad at black people.
100% of the people that I'm mad at are well-educated white liberals.
In my mind, the sort of archetype, the person I don't like is like a 38-year-old female white lawyer with a barren personal life.
That's who yells at me on airplanes.
And so I always say people, like you're racist.
Okay, before, okay, let me.
We're going to get to that in feminism.
Amanda Marcott is a perfect example of that.
Mad at Black People, like, what are you talking about?
Let me show you.
Let me guess, let me show you.
Did you say fuck you?
I hope so.
But you're racist.
Okay, before, okay, let me.
Sylvia, I'm not mad at black people, like, what are you talking about?
Let me show you.
Let me show you, I think, why people react this way.
I think we have a clip I just wanted to show you.
Sydney, can you play that?
In political terms, this policy is called the Great Replacement, the replacement of legacy Americans with more obedient people from faraway countries.
So, Tucker, what's a legacy American?
People who were born here, black people, white people, Hispanic people, Asian people, people who are citizens, people who participated, hold on, generationally in our system.
And a lot of them don't buy the program of the modern Democratic Party because it doesn't serve them.
And so the center of the Democratic electoral strategy going forward, I'm not guessing, they talk about it constantly.
You're a journalist, you must have noticed, is to bring in new people who will vote for them.
Now, do you think?
Let me just finish, if you don't mind.
This is not something that I made up or found on the internet.
I don't even really go on the internet.
This is something that Democrats, including the architect of Obama's last victory, have talked about at great lengths in pieces, monographs, on television.
They've written books about.
So this is not like some crackpot allele when you talk about it.
This is the central strategy of the Democratic Party.
So to be like, I can't have it.
So Ben Smith here is trying to bait him into talking about the Jews will not replace as Charlottesville shit because their allegation is we're petrified that we'll be the minority one day.
No, no.
We're petrified that Americans will be the minority one day.
And people who speak without accents will be the minority one day.
The word replacements in both of those things, though.
And by the way, you guys brag about this, the Browning of America and how whites will be a minority.
You love it.
And then when we go, we don't love it, you go, you don't love what?
I didn't say anything.
I was talking about that.
You talked about generational investment.
How many generations makes you a legacy of America?
I'm just saying people who live here now.
Including the people who are in the world.
Do you have any empathy for somebody who sees that clip, somebody whose parents are from India, from China, who are Jewish, and say, wow, I don't think I just see that clip.
Jewish.
And I don't really think this guy includes me in his vision of America.
Sort of.
Isn't that amazing that he injected Jewish into that?
So when, like, Jews haven't been here for a long time?
So when he says, the implication there is that when Tucker says legacy Americans, real Americans, he doesn't mean Jews.
Like, that's fucking Antifa shit.
This guy has the brain of a 16-year-old punk rock chick.
No, I don't have any, as you said, empathy for people who...
Do you understand why they might be aware of that?
Please let me, if you don't mind, if I could finish.
I have no empathy for people who derive their judgments about anything from 30-second clips on media matters.
I do an hour live every single night.
If you want to know what I think, I don't know that there's anyone who's more transparent about it than I am.
Not all of my views are correct.
Not all of them are attractive.
You may laugh at some of them.
You may be offended by others, but I'm very clear about what I think.
I believe that people are not the sum total of their genetics.
I say that constantly.
And as a Christian, I really mean it.
I actually buy the kind of Dr. Seuss, please, version of race understanding, which is judge a person by what he does, not by how he looks.
I actually believe that.
I do things like California in the 70s.
And I say it constantly.
You do, but you see.
And yet somehow, talk your life.
And I guess the thing that, you know, you have an hour every night, as you said.
And I'll just second that.
I want to move on to some other questions.
Okay, don't filibuster me.
But you are misunderstood, perhaps, in your view, a lot then, both by, as you said, in the New York Times, but also you keep having sort of explicit white supremacists who have, you know, on secret message boards who work for you.
I know this has been very painful for you in some cases.
I've never even met a white supremacist.
You have folks who have posted, you have a large number of people, Scott Breer, Blake Neff.
I'm just curious why you've been sort of flypaper for these people on your staff.
I'm not sure you're not asking me a question.
That was the question.
Why have you been flypapered for these racists?
I've never had a white supremacist work for me.
I don't think I've ever talked to a white supremacist.
Please let me finish.
And I don't want to fight about labels.
Hold on, so now I'm not sure what that means.
I know that it's a slur.
It's the worst thing one can be.
I don't really understand the terms, but let me just say that.
You had to let people go who said objectively.
Well, now, Ben, I believe that people are not defined by their race, any race.
Black, white, Asian.
Pick a race.
Yeah, people are.
See, this is again the all dogs are mammals, all cats are mammals, all dogs are not cats.
Why are you a fly paper to racists?
You know what's a fly paper to white nationalists working out?
They think it's good to get in shape and pump iron and get pumped.
Ryan and I were working out this morning.
We also work out regularly.
How can you have such adolescent logic and be sitting?
How can you have any kind of a podium or a mouthpiece, a microphone on you when you don't understand junior high logic?
You had someone to work for you who was on a racist message board?
Can you imagine if these fucking losers applied the same kind of fine-tooth comb to any of their other allies, like Palestinians, like American blacks, like fucking any of the dogmatic anti-life feminists that they lie in bed with?
I mean, the shit they say, the racist shit they say about Clarence Thomas, all this stuff.
But there's a rumor that someone who worked for Tucker once went on a message board, unverified?
Wow.
What a racist he might, what fly paper he must be.
Fine, their value derives from, A, the fact they were created by God.
I believe that.
Maybe you don't.
I do.
And B, by what they do, by the choices they make, by who they are.
They have agency.
They're not part of some larger group.
They're individuals.
I believe in the individual.
And I say that virtually every night.
Now, if you don't hear that, or if you, for whatever reason, want to claim that I'm some racist, I don't know what to say to you.
Do you see the fidgeting, by the way?
Oh, yeah.
Just look at the left screen.
He's made a piece of origami in his hand.
It's like an accordion by now.
It's got 37 folds in it.
The blinking, the licking, the lips.
He's so nervous that what he's doing is when he's done a question, he folds it away so he won't have to go through it again.
Just use your pen and cross it out like I do.
Individual.
At the end of it, he's going to be like, so Tucker, pick one.
Racist?
You are my friend.
I love you.
Now, what will you say to this swan that I've created?
I believe in the individual.
And I say that virtually every night.
Now, if you don't hear that, or if you for whatever reason and want to claim that I'm some racist, I don't know what to say to you.
I'm stating my sincere views as reflected in my personal life and my professional life as clearly as I can.
Do you feel that just in your own career you've been kind of discriminated against as a white Protestant?
No.
No.
And I ask in part because I had been told that Roger Ailes, and that you'd sort of at some point expressed that Roger Ailes, the former head of Fox, had a preference for Irish Catholics, and that it kind of held you back.
Was that...
I've been held back.
And by the way, I think...
He's got the number one show on the network.
Imagine if he wasn't held back.
Billy, if I could, that I've never in my life been unhappy except because of self-pity.
Self-pity is...
I'm speaking for myself, but I think it's true for most people.
Self-pity is the root of misery.
And so I really try not to feel self-pity.
I have no grounds for it anyway.
What a shit show.
I don't want to miss it if he does something mean.
Can we skip forward to the...
Maybe I should not surprise you guys and watch something fresh so I can.
I think it's kind of fun to get that first react, but it is a nine-minute clip, so there might be some things we might have missed.
Let's see.
I live where I want.
I speak to the country, which is they have.
So the language of replacement theory, which you responding to, I'm interviewing.
Oh, there we go.
We got to see this.
Sorry.
Ability and their virtue on the choices they make, not on the genes they have.
That's Nazi shit.
I'm against that.
I'm serious.
Let me ask you about a different subject, which is January 6th.
And I think...
Oh, no, I kind of like this stuff.
You're not responding to me.
No, I'm.
Yeah, I like how every good point he makes means nothing.
I don't want to get into terms.
It's null.
I'm not responding to you.
I'm interviewing you.
Does that sound racist to you?
You just suggested I'm a white supremacist.
Yeah, I found that clip disturbing.
I think the language of replacement theory, which you've popularized, the language of replacement theory is specifically the language used by neo-Nazis to recruit people to their cause.
It has been, obviously, I'm not suggesting some straight line between words and actions, but it is a phrase that has been used by mass shooters.
I wonder if you don't have any compunction or regret about popularizing that?
This is why you are considered correctly a propagandist and not a journalist.
Because I just explained in detail, with total sincerity, what I believe.
You ignored it and invoked mass shooters.
So that's not what you're doing.
I just asked you how you felt about it.
Let's actually do an...
You know what's so great too?
This guy is in front of an audience.
So all these people are watching and being spanked.
And he's in the stage by a guy who's sitting in his home office.
Comfy and looking great, not sweating, not crumpling paper.
Yeah.
And he's like, you talked about the replacement theory.
It's invoked by mass shooters.
It's in Nazis use it.
Yeah, because it's true.
The only parsing out of that is the Nazis say that Jews are doing it because they hate white people.
The DNC is openly admitting they do it because of votes.
In a few years, we're going to be a majority brown country.
White people will not be the majority in the country anymore.
This will be the first generation ever in American history in which whites will be a minority of the generation at some point.
So yeah, Nazis, non-Nazis, libertarians, they all mention that it rains because it rains.
That doesn't mean Tucker is responsible for them mentioning it raining.
Anyway, sorry, we spent too much time on that.
Another little fun piece of gossip.
Voter fraud is a myth.
It never happened.
Biden won the election fair and square.
That's what the media states.
They're constantly running cover for him.
I was just reading in the post, a paw in the family for Biden about that's all in the family pun about the diary being ignored, Ashley Biden's diary, where she says, Was I molested?
I think so.
I can't remember specifics, but I do remember trauma, hyper-sexualized at a young age.
I remember being somewhat sexualized with Caroline.
I remember having sex with friends at a young age, showers with my dad that were probably not appropriate.
Can you fucking imagine if that was Trump?
He compliments his daughter's beauty on a show, and people still talk about it.
Yeah, and they say he wants to fuck her.
But here we have this woman, Raquel Rodriguez, facing felony voter fraud charges.
And the numbers are amazing in this clip.
She didn't put in three fake votes.
She's behind thousands.
Dylan picking up the balance when he was with me.
That's illegal.
I could go to jail.
So I'm a little apprehensive to tell somebody what I'm fing doing.
I guess Trump was right.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm about doing something legal.
Yeah.
They all said he was full of shit.
Oh, help me.
You said you were voting for a piece of it.
So it's not so fake.
The left will deny such a thing exists.
Also, in the fun, open, silly section of the show, we have New York City is more insane than it is than it's ever been.
I wouldn't say that it's ever been.
We are in 1992.
We are in David Dinkins, New York.
This guy who stabbed a fucking lunatic.
We've shown the video, right?
Yeah.
Oh, wait, no, I don't think we have.
Have you not?
No.
Oh, man, it's brutal how fast he bleeds.
Yeah, I love Drew and Garrett, but they could afford to pull up a few more videos while we're talking.
No?
Is that mean?
I don't think it's mean.
So look, he shoves him.
Now, stop, stop.
If you can't.
If you look at the legal parameters of assault or attempted murder, the shit you get in trouble for is hitting them when they're down.
In fact, that's really what fried John and Max.
Max, after he got him down, he smashed his head against the pavement a few times.
And John kicked the guy after he was down about five or six times.
That really fucks you.
Because you're supposed to do everything you can to stop the assault and then get away, right?
The other thing they always talk about is, could you get away?
Like if you were at a water slide and you were next and you punch a guy and then get on the water, then you're in trouble because you could have just gone down the water slide.
This guy is literally a cornered rat.
There is no egress.
There is no way for him to get out of there.
He has no fucking choice.
And this guy, Amiri, is clearly picking on him because he thinks he's old and can take him.
He's bullying an old man.
He's our new...
Who's the guy who shot those people in the 80s and said you want another?
Bernie Getz.
Bernie Goetz.
This guy's good at stabbing.
He's done this before.
Allegedly.
The way he gets into the neck?
This guy's been through some shit.
And then he keeps stabbing.
By the way, someone pointed out.
I didn't see this.
Maybe you could replay it.
She's stabbing him.
That's what I heard.
I don't really see her stabbing him though.
I hate when people say things that aren't true.
She's not stabbing him.
That fucking guy.
Who said that?
I was at this getter function last night.
And this guy's like, yeah, did you know she was stabbing him too while he was fighting him?
And I go, no way.
I didn't see that.
Yeah, yeah, she was stabbing him in the back.
Holy.
And then I think I told a couple people.
Oh, that's how that starts.
By the way, I had a great night last night.
I went to this getter party.
And I went to this getter party and I hung out with, I always forget her name.
It's a big Greek name.
Here we go.
Vicki Palladino.
Oh, she's a fan of the girl.
I love her.
She's a little firebrand.
She's not Greek.
She's Italian.
White-haired woman, you can tell she was a fucking smokeshow when she was young.
She's still very attractive.
That's my friend's aunt.
Really?
Yeah, yeah.
We worked together and we live like a mile away from each other.
Yeah, Pat actually had her on way early in the campaign.
And also her son is really funny, a really smart Italian guy.
I've been on a Pat's show a lot too.
She's funny.
She's the one who gave it to Di Blasio in the street where she's like, de Blasio, you're a fucking communist.
You're a piece of shit.
You remember that?
That's what put her on the map.
Oh, yeah?
Not the guy who said, not good, you fucking fag.
No, that guy's a hero, too, but for different reasons.
Well, I found out that she is denying funding to schools that do Drag Queen Story Hour.
Wow.
I want to get her on Tucker.
She's awesome.
Basio is used to sparring with other political figures, but it was a potential face-off with a feisty 63-year-old mother from Queens who caused Mayor de Blasio to turn and run.
The woman in the white shirt single-handedly brought WrestleMania to the streets of Whitestone, Queens.
But her opponent, Bill de Blasio, was no Hulk Hogan or the Rock.
He was more like the cowardly lion in the Wizard of Oz.
I want to know why you let your police officers down and our country down by going to Germany and protesting against our country.
The mayor was in Whitestone to announce new funding to fix this.
Anyways, she was back the Proud Boys too.
Stood by them.
And then I went, hung out with Ami Horowitz, who did a fucking amazing video.
I'll show you in a second.
But yeah, this city is completely out of control.
I talked about it with Palladino quite a bit.
But what are we saying with that attack?
That if you get attacked and you're cornered like that, you just have to sit and take the beating?
Is that what the law is telling us?
One guy I was talking to, his theory is that people of color are no longer unified.
They don't have that intersectionality anymore.
So the law goes, hmm, black guy and a lighter-skinned guy.
He's Hispanic, but we're going to make him white.
So you killed a black guy, so you're fucked.
His first bail was $500,000.
Now he's free.
It's down to $50,000, so they had to pay $5.
Yeah, people were outraged.
I mean, part of that idiot's hubris was him knowing there's no bail, and he's going to be fine.
No, you're not going to be fine.
Here's another look at our wonderful city.
This is not far from the studio, 2-0.
Oh, shit.
I was supposed to include something else with this.
Wait, wait, before you show this, you might be able to find this.
I saw this clip about the requirements to become a cop in the MYPD.
And it used to be this six-foot wall that you had to jump over in like one jump, which is going to come up.
And now it's a chain link fence that my nine-year-old could climb.
I mean, chain link fence, they're little stairs.
You can put your feet in the holes and get up.
Remember sneaking into baseball diamonds as a kid?
Yeah, that's it.
Every place you snuck into your entire life was you climbing a chain link fence.
That's not a thing.
Maybe scroll down it.
Red position.
Yeah, that's it.
That's what they have to climb now.
That used to be a solid piece of wood, and you used to have to jump over.
There we go.
You used to have to jump over it like that.
Not anymore.
Now we want fat people to chase criminals, which is going to go great.
Anyway, check out this scene, speaking of chasing criminals.
What a joke.
Look, he's on the subway tracks.
And they're about to catch him.
They've gone up the stairs.
They're right behind him.
Nope, you're not catching me.
I'm on the run.
Do it.
It'll work.
Trust me.
Look, no one gives a shit either, whether he lives or dies.
That was a really good jump.
All right, so the cops now should run around the edge.
Look, it's all just a movie to them.
And look at these short, fat female cops.
They look like Ryan's Nona.
I don't have a Nona.
They look like your great-grandma.
Look at them.
So one of them manages to climb the Chainlink fence.
Sort of.
I think that's even a chick.
And then the others are like, too hard.
And they give up.
So now she's alone to go catch fucking Spider-Man.
Spider-Man's the worst influence on the black community right now.
Yeah.
With him riding on the top of the trains.
You saw that?
Yeah.
Well, that...
Ben Smith should do a whole takedown of how Spider-Man's become fly paper for dangerous black criminals.
Look at his fucking pants.
There was a dude on the train yesterday.
He had sweatpants on.
His sweatpants were hanging below his dick.
You could see his dick sitting in his pants.
Yep.
Below his dick.
His entire ass was up.
That's classic.
That's a classic look, Gav.
I've seen that maybe 10 years ago.
You know, Heather McDonald in the book War on Cops, she talks about an interesting demographic in the hood.
And it's the guys who don't want any of this shit.
They don't want to get shot.
They don't want to deal drugs.
They don't want to do drugs.
They play video games all night because you can't go outside.
And they work at Best Buy.
And they don't gangbang.
No one ever talks about them.
And I've been spotting them now.
And you know what I've noticed about them?
I'll pay you $17,000 if you know what I'm going to say next.
Say that one more time.
You weren't listening?
I was, but I was looking at saggy pants also.
So I wasn't ready for it.
I just lost your money.
Fuck.
They all wear vans.
Not just vans' shoes, but vans gear, vans sweatpants, vans shirts.
That's like their gang.
The non-gang bangers have a gang, and it's called vans.
And they're not looking for trouble.
And they're going to live, and they're going to stay out of jail.
God bless their cotton socks.
Also in the news, I might be allowed back on Twitter.
I don't know.
Some insiders there told me that it's been decided that the 10% on the right and 10% on the left are never coming back no matter what.
It's the middle 80% they're discussing.
I'm not open to debate.
But anyway, this dude, Berenson, what's his name?
Alex Berenson.
He sued Twitter and said, you just banned me out of the blue because I was talking about COVID.
I can't talk about my settlement with Twitter beyond yesterday's three-sentence statement.
I take that obligation seriously.
My lips are sealed.
But I can talk about what the settlement may mean.
Oh, this is written by him.
So he sued them because their terms of service said five strikes, you're out.
He had one strike.
That's not fair.
Now, I only had one strike, and the strike didn't make any sense because my Twitter posts were all normal.
The past like 20 of them were jokes.
And just out of the blue, I was gone.
Same day, Facebook and everyone was.
By the way, we'll be covering that in the racism segment of the show.
I'm being taught in schools under the banner of hate.
You know, was this the guy who, when he went on, Tim Poole just had a guest, and when he went on Tucker, right after he complained about being banned on Twitter, he was immediately reinstated.
Isn't that weird?
Yeah, but it was the lawsuit that got him reinstated.
Oh, he mentioned that he was going to do a lawsuit?
No, he did a lawsuit.
I think there was a different guy, actually, that was on Tim Poole.
Yeah, it wasn't.
Wow, you're really hitting out of the park today.
They were citing Alex Berenson.
I thought you would have heard of this, but they were citing Alex Berenson's thing.
Guy was banned, went on Tucker.
Right afterwards, like 40 minutes afterwards.
We'd love to know who that is.
That sounds like a great story.
I've been meaning to get to this for a while.
I didn't want to cover it in the live show because it's too important.
But these Dutch farmers, I promised you we'd look at this.
They're getting strangled to death.
Literally strangled to death.
They are being so choked out that they're hanging themselves because they can't live.
Why is this happening?
Because the Netherlands has decided to err on the side of caution and follow all of the EU's insane rules about nitrogen emissions.
And they've decided that Dutch farmers, who are the second biggest agriculture exporters in the world, are to blame.
Now, here's a good thread on it.
2-3.
This guy seems to really know his shit.
It was Rich Barris, by the way.
It was who?
Rich Barris.
Rich Barris.
Looks pretty rich.
How juvenile is it to have a guitar and some swords behind you?
Are you 11?
11?
That looks like Alex Berenson.
Well, it's Rich Barris.
Okay.
He looks exactly like the other guy.
Managed to climb the Dutch farmer strike.
Okay, go down a bit.
Dutch farmer strike because the government cut nitrogen emissions by stealing farmers' land and putting them out of business.
There's some summaries there.
The Dutch farmers reacted the way you'd expect.
They got pissed and protested.
So the Dutch government is trying to kill them.
And there's footage.
I was going to show this later, but there they are shooting at a guy in a tractor.
Now that bullet happened to go, hit the divider between the front window and the back window.
If it had hit the windows, he'd be dead.
And the Netherlands is very strict about the police and guns.
You can use your guns if someone is coming at you.
You cannot shoot at a tractor that's leaving.
The Dutch, yep.
Why the Dutch government do this?
To meet EU climate goals.
That's what I said earlier.
They know this is going to starve people around the world.
Go down.
They're trying to justify and rationalize.
Look at this.
The UN's website.
They concede this.
Click on that link.
Ooh.
Oops.
We didn't mean to say that part out loud.
They're going to score your food and limit how much of it you can buy accordingly.
Carbon food labels may be coming.
This is getting dark, man.
They're trying to starve us to death?
Go to 2-4.
It's about killing the supply chain.
Supermarkets in the Netherlands, inspired by the Canadian trucker protests.
Farmers in the Netherlands are blocking major distribution routes in protest against the government.
Oh, good, yeah.
Truckers and farmers show the world how to defeat corrupt politicians everywhere.
Now, do they care?
I mean, obviously they don't make a profit from not selling anything, but do they care that people don't have food to buy?
Well, it's a strange thing because you go, are these people, these globalists, these politicians, are they choking the food supply so we all starve?
Well, then you'd think they'd like this, but then this is making it too obvious.
They'd rather slowly boil the frog with some warm water.
We just burnt the frog alive.
And they get no cash.
Go to 2.5?
I was saying this to someone the other day.
I'm loaded, but my home Con Ed bill is $50 a day.
This studio is $25 a day.
Now, we've been Nazis with the AC and the lights, so we'll see what it is this month.
I bet you it'll go down five bucks a day at the most.
And to fill my jag is $100.
I can afford it, but how can everyone else?
I said it to a friend of mine and he goes, yeah, that's why they're coming after our guns.
This was pretty cool, 2-5.
They arrested some kid.
This is from Tommy Robinson.
To bring home the 16-year-old boy whom Mark Root, that's the prime minister of the Netherlands, whom Mark Root, who his police shot and then arrested.
They shot a boy and then arrested him for protesting their own extermination.
They're ending these people's lives.
And if they dare fight back, they get shot by the government.
This is a big fucking story.
Here's cops pointing guns at farmers.
2-6.
Look at that.
Get the fuck out of the tractor, motherfucker, or you're dead.
And then 2-7, I think we've already shown that shot.
Like, I'm annoyed when Americans roll their eyes at other countries, even Canada, because it's not America, it's never going to happen here.
And then it always ends up happening here.
So pay close attention to every other Western country, oh, that's the thing I was just telling you about between the two bullets, between the two windows.
Every other Western country is a harbinger of things to come.
We're not that different.
The truckers in Ottawa are the same as the farmers in the Netherlands, and we're going to have our own version of it here.
We already have in many ways.
Who knows how much the government and its own media were behind these riots with BLM so they could control us more?
Who knows how much they're behind mass shooters?
We've already caught them trying to kidnap governors.
And the funny thing about this is 2.8, this has been going on for a long time.
This started in 2019.
This clip I'm showing you now, it's 2018 where they were protesting this idea that they're ruining the world with all their horrific pollution.
Nitrogen emissions.
Shut the fuck up.
Imagine Greta Sustern is having people lose their entire careers.
Boy, your YouTube algorithm is fucking gay.
No, it's not.
Look at it.
More plates, more dates.
Look at all the hunks.
Destiny.
Well, I don't see hunks.
I see muscle groups.
And I see.
That top guy looks ridiculous.
That's Derek from More Plates More Dates.
He's the Delt King.
Look at that Delt.
That's idiotic.
Girls don't even like that.
You just all you did was waste thousands of hours in the gym.
Not about girls.
It's about being the optimal version of yourself.
That's not optimal.
Not for boxing, I'm learning.
Not for anything.
It's hard to make salad with those things.
How to get inside in boxing?
Tim Poole, The Joker.
2-9, my last thing on it before we get to the green screen.
This guy's pretty interesting.
I got to hand it to Keene Baxt.
He's an old rebel dude.
I don't know what happened with him, why he's not there anymore.
Ezra, I think Ezra's very quick to end friendships.
I love the guy to death.
But he's even ended our friendship a couple times where I fucked up and he was like, see a shithead.
But he said, Jack Pesobic, Lauren Southern, Faith Goldie, me, I didn't leave with on bad terms.
I got a much better offer.
Keen Bax, some great people.
I'm big on not firing people and giving them second, third chances and warnings.
You wouldn't believe the absolute losers I've had over the years that I've managed to sculpt into something aft decent.
Let's see this last one.
You're wrong, Gavin.
Okay, well, you just had a lot.
You've been through a lot of good people.
Yeah, sure.
But there's a lot of, you know, trash that had weed out, Gavin.
Was Lauren Southern trash?
No.
Okay.
But, you know, sometimes you lose a couple good ones trying to weeze out.
What happened with you and Keenbax?
Fucking...
Keen Baxed fucking went over here trying to get some pockets.
Ezra, you're turning into bubbles.
What?
You just turned into bubbles, Ezra.
Get a fucking Canadian accent.
Get over your pockets, half.
Okay, let's see the fucking clip, please.
So just yesterday, a young boy was shot at and is under arrest right behind us.
He's under arrest in prison here, yes.
Is it normal in the Netherlands for the police to shoot?
Only when it's life-threatening for them, they can shoot.
But that was not life-threatening.
Do you think that the Prime Minister has created a climate where the police think that they're allowed to do stuff like this?
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
What are the consequences?
What does that mean?
It means that on this moment, for minor things, they can arrest you or shoot you and put you in jail.
Did you see the protests in Canada?
Yes, I have seen them.
Do you think it's a similar situation?
Yes, for...
Yeah, the majority is the same.
Yes.
What do the farmers want?
The farmers want a stable future.
A normal stable future.
And not like what now is happening.
They buy the farm and they are gone.
That's the problem.
They want to live.
You told me earlier that they have no future and they were hanging themselves.
Is that something that people are aware of?
Is that a crisis right now?
Yes.
This is a crisis.
Yes.
Certainly.
What do you want to tell the world?
Look to other things to solve.
It's not only a farmer, it's sending cars, airplanes, you name it.
Look to China.
They don't regulate the emissions.
They don't.
Why not look at them?
Why look your farmer?
The farmer is the one who gives you the food, who makes your life.
What a perfect ending to that segment.
That's fantastic.
Okay, and again, Holland, the Netherlands, same thing.
They have a few, Aruba, they have St. Martin, but it's commonly confused with Scandinavia, which is a collection of countries in Northern Europe.
Holland and Netherlands, same thing, just one.
And that fucking prime minister is committing genocide to Virtue Signal.
Wow.
I'd rather let people die than not be invited to the elite's dinner parties.
These people are demonic.
I mean, this is like a satanic fucking ritual at this point.
Anyway, let's change course drastically with a fun green screen about Hollywood.
Sorry, I have to take a break here.
I'm quite parched.
And we have a bunch of different Gatorades.
One is yellow.
This is orange, though it looks yellow on the screen.
And I find the yellow one tastes like pea.
Excuse me.
That could be...
That's probably psychosomatic.
Oh, wait a minute.
I live with a fucking...
I work with a Chinese guy.
They always play jokes.
They go pee-pee in Coke.
They might go pee-pee in Gatorade.
Ryan, have you been peeing in my Gatorade?
No.
I've been peeing in a different bottle and pouring it into the Gatorade bottles.
Great.
So this is kind of an exciting phenomenon.
Coke bottles.
That you have not heard about.
The biggest story in politics has been right under your nose and you didn't know.
Major figures in the not left movement, in the conservative movement, have entered the zone of showbiz.
Now, we've seen this in politics with the Proud Boys, especially in Florida.
About a dozen members of the Miami GOP are openly proud.
Proud to be gay.
Proud to be Proud Boys.
And that freaks out a lot of people, but no one has realized how extensive the invasion of Hollywood is.
And this was all pre-planned.
I know these guys.
I've spoken to these guys.
I remember when this plan was hatched many years ago, and they said, look, our leader, Breitbart, said that the politics is downstream from the culture.
So it's cute that Proud Boys are getting into the GOP.
But what we really need to do is get into movies, get into acting, get on TV.
And if we can do that, we become re-humanized, and then we have influence again.
The biggest problem with being on the right these days is they manage to censor us and wipe us out, and then they can dehumanize us and say, oh, that guy's a white supremacist who denies the Holocaust and thinks whites are better than other people and follows the great replacement theory and says the Jews are trying to replace us and you don't want him around.
So we said, oh yeah, we're going to show you that we're not that in a fun and exciting way.
Now I'm doing it.
I've been putting out movies now.
I'm just putting out a movie now with big celebs.
I've got Justin Thoreau on board, Todd Berry standing by me.
Who else?
Patton Oswalt?
There, I've been hanging out with Justin Thoreau.
He's sort of lonely now because he's divorced Jennifer Anniston.
And you got to take advantage of that.
It's sort of like, see, on the way back down, I've been working with all of these comedians and actors.
Have you got that clip of me hanging out with them?
Now, they were a little hesitant, I have to admit, to join me.
Carson Bailey?
It wouldn't take long.
I know.
I can't.
I'm sorry.
I would love to, but I actually wouldn't love to do that now.
Well, go get some to eat in there.
Are you fing kidding me?
You're wearing a wire.
After about one minute on stage, I went, oh, okay, so there we go.
Working with all of those celebs.
Those guys weren't totally enthusiastic, but you can tell that they're eventually going to be on board.
I've also been hanging out with Amber Heard.
She's sort of persona non grata, and that's the way that we've been infiltrating Hollywood.
Here we are.
You got to go down a bit, I guess.
You start with people like Amber who are on the outs, and they need someone.
It's like buy low, sell high.
And so there's more pictures of us together.
I'm including these because I know you won't believe me.
And we're talking about making a movie together.
I'm not cheating.
I'm never going to sleep with her.
But I think we can make beautiful music together in the arts.
All right, so let's look at some of these people that have been kicking ass and taking names and taking over Hollywood.
There's Jay Johnson.
Remember Jay Johnson?
He was in.
He was in...
What the fuck?
He was at January 6th.
I thought I included that link.
Did I forget it?
Yeah, that's it.
Did actor Jay Johnson participate in the U.S. Capitol riot?
So that makes Jay look, I don't know what happened to me there, I vanished.
That makes Jay look pretty bad in the left's eyes.
So to rebuild his image, he's getting into voice acting.
And now he's Jimmy Pesto on the show Bob's Burgers.
Here he is.
Here, skip ahead a little bit because there's a joke about getting in there.
Yeah, that's him.
Turn it up.
Okay.
Yeah.
Just can't zoom as hard with these dumb stitches.
Whatever.
The pharmacist said the medication could make you drowsy.
I don't know.
I didn't really pay attention.
What is that?
That's an inversion table, Bob.
It's from my back.
Sometimes I iron on it.
Stop looking at it.
I don't want your eye grease getting all over it.
How's your pain then?
I'm glad you're feeling.
I know Jay well.
I think that's the kind of thing that Jay would say.
And he's been...
Jay's also getting into stand-up, sorry, sketch comedy.
And he's doing this.
Here's an example of some of the sketches he's doing.
Look, he comes home from climbing Mount Everest.
Thomas!
Oh!
You did it!
Climbed Mount Everest!
Oh, it's so good to be home.
I see nothing's changed.
Oh, that's new.
Oh, that's my thimble collection.
I do love it so.
Enough of that.
Tell us of your adventure.
It truly was an adventure.
He's working with the guy from Better Call Saul.
Two men died.
Yes.
One slipped over a ridge.
His scream still echoes in my mind.
Why is his head cropped?
On the final day, with the peak in sight, I suddenly felt my quick broke go slack.
But before I was able to catch on.
If you go to 1.5, you'll see everyone saying, oh my god, that sketch was hilarious.
How was it done?
So now Jay is not known as the January 6th guy.
He's known as the Hollywood guy who does sketches everyone writes about.
And now they look back and they go, maybe Jan 6 wasn't so bad.
Just like me with getting Justin Thoreau and Carson Daly, people go, maybe proud boys aren't so evil.
Another guy who's been getting out there is Michael Knowles.
You know, Michael Knowles, he's got his own show on Daily Wire.
Real smarty pants guy.
He's always breaking down classic literature and the Bible.
I don't think he owns a TV.
He's one of those guys with a big library who's actually read the books.
He's moved to LA from DC and has started doing acting roles.
Not because he needs the money.
This guy makes all his money from the Shapiro Foundation, but he's decided, I'm going to get in there to show people that conservatives can be fun.
So he did a movie called Holly Weird.
Here's a clip of some of the stuff he's been doing recently.
Every once in a while left the house, you would get some adventure.
Uh-oh, look behind you.
So student films mostly.
He's got to start low.
Holly Weird, though, is the winner of that.
Go to 1-8.
Oh, no, you didn't show it all.
Go farther down.
He's done a lot of shit recently.
Very dramatic.
Wait, go towards the end.
Sometimes I wish the elderly would just die.
So you want to go out after we wrap this up?
He's good at it.
There's the movie, Hollyweird.
He plays like a scarface guy.
Oh, my.
I can't believe you're here.
I tell you, Manhattan may be big, but it's still an island.
And you're an actor.
Wait, go farther?
You're acting.
That's what you got to do.
I want to see him be the Cuban guy.
Why does he keep playing this stupid?
Alex.
And he said, okay, it's a Chinese hopping vampire.
Oh, here we go.
I'm Bosco.
Yeah, there it is.
No, I'm going to be Bosco.
No, that's me.
And your accent sounds really bait.
Don't be mad at me.
I'm just the player.
Looks like you're wearing a costume.
I'm more Hispanic than you, and I'm not even Hispanic.
You're perfect.
It's good.
It's a good scarface, right?
Anyway, that's exciting.
Another guy getting into it is our own Owen Benjamin.
Now, we know Owen Benjamin from Bear Topia.
He's still running the farm up there in the middle of fucking nowhere.
Where is he now?
Ohio or some shit?
There's his OwenBenjamin.com.
You can see his popular stream.
Sign up to the...
What's the thing you sign up for, Ryan?
I think it would be Bear Taria.
Bear Taria, yeah.
He's got all his stuff there, but he's known as a villain who lost his mind.
So he's gone back to Hollywood and started getting involved in movies.
He just did a movie called The House Bunny.
And there he is talking about it.
It's weird seeing him back in LA.
Turn it up a little bit.
Playboy bunnies and girls.
I play the butler of the Playboy Mansion named Marvin.
And I'm sure it wasn't invested the whole movie, which is pretty sweet.
And yeah, it was a blast working with all these people, really good people.
Had a really good time.
What is Anna's up to the next time?
See what he's doing here?
He's sort of sweetening his look.
He's sort of shading.
Boyish charm to himself.
It's not as deep of a voice.
He's much cheerier.
I mean, you would never know if I talked to her that she was the one who was.
He's also started dating Christina Ricci.
I don't know if they're dating or hanging out.
Now, this is weird because Owen's very loyal to his wife.
But I think his wife understands that this is good for business and it's good for the movement in general.
And my understanding is that this is just what I've heard, but they have a pact that they don't sleep together.
So he pretends that he's not on the spectrum, but asexual.
And she's pretty happy with that.
Are you going to be pulling this up anytime soon?
Dead Link.
Really?
But there's plenty of TMZ.
They're catching them all over the place.
Pop Sugar is a Dead Link?
Correct.
Okay, so there they are hanging out.
And that's big, because Christina Ricci was really popular.
She was in Buffalo 66.
Young girls, like my daughter, is really into Christina Ricci.
She thinks she's cool.
They're a very absurd couple, size-wise.
And he's befriended her.
And I don't believe it's sincere.
I think it's because the right was getting known as evil and inhuman, and it's important for them to learn that we're people.
So he hangs out with Christina Ricci.
He's also got a show now, not just the Bertaria thing.
He has a show about burgers where he slips in his own agenda a little bit.
Turn it up.
If I aim all that energy, all that jiz strength into my family, my woman, my life, I can make people and food.
Let's dig in.
Oh, yeah.
Oh.
Oh.
That's pretty cool.
I'm just amazing how successful it is.
And then my pal Ami Horowitz, who just went to Palestine.
You got to see this thing he did in Palestine, by the way.
He went, he asked a bunch of gays.
Well, I'll let him explain it.
Go back to the beginning.
Do you think most people, most gay people tend to side more than the Palestinians versus the Israelis in general in the conflict?
I would say yes, because the human issues.
100%.
I've done Man the Street videos all across the world on explosive topics.
This is the first time I've had a local producer expressly forbid me from doing this segment because he thinks that asking people about homosexuality will absolutely explode into violence.
In the Palestine territories, there's not much of a debate on gay marriage.
Here, the discussion is more about the killing and the torturing of members of the LGBT community.
Honestly, I didn't know that that was even going on.
They don't value human rights.
What should be done to gay people?
I mean, it's horrifying.
That's just a trailer.
That is so good.
You know how involved it is for a Jew to go to Palestine?
It's illegal.
He made up a fake persona.
He pretended that he was an American Palestinian who had lost his way, and he doesn't speak Arabic, so he had a translator.
And he was trying to get back into his culture, which, of course, they love.
So he's learning about his culture and he's learning.
So, what should we do about fags?
And they're like, oh, welcome home.
We killed him.
Oh, cool, cool.
And that's one of my favorite things, by the way, is seeing the left confront their allies and learn that Islam hates their fucking guts.
We have more in common.
Like, I don't think women should drive either.
And to be honest, when I'm walking around New York City, the women are so hot, I kind of do want them in burqas.
So we're kind of on the same page.
They just took it way too far.
But the problem with that is it's only going to be seen by the left.
I mean, sorry, by the right.
Because when we see Ami Horowitz, we go, oh, he's our guy.
And, well, the Nazis don't like him, but also the left doesn't like him because he's evil.
He's well known, by the way.
His big hit video was this Swedish video where he looked into the rape over there.
And he said, this is all Muslim refugees that's doing the raping.
Why don't you mention that?
And you don't fucking say that in Sweden.
He got fucking physically attacked when he was in Norway years later because of that video.
Like, they get raped to death over there.
And they still put these fucking Muslim refugees on a pedestal.
Anyway, how do we get that video seen by lots of people?
More than just the right.
Well, Ami got a role on a fucking sitcom on ABC called Schooler, I think.
Where is it here?
School.
Here he is in School.
It's fine.
I got a solid replacement.
The acting isn't great.
That's Goldberg.
What's his name?
Dear Lord, what's he doing here?
Oh, and you know each other?
Yeah, I know him.
That's my dear big brother.
Well, that D-hole is my QB.
Nick Miller is prepared to play this bastardized version of America's game.
Let's block it up!
We seriously have to play against this thing?
No, because Coach Wilma is cheating.
Anyway, he's really good on the show.
It's not the best written show, but it's on ABC.
It's seen by millions of people.
Now Ami's mainstream.
And then finally, I guess my last example of this is the winner, Nick Searcy.
Now, Nick Searcy did a fucking amazing movie.
We loved his Capital Punishment, the movie about January 6th.
But his Piest de Résistance, of course, is Gosnell, where he did a dramatization of the true story of Kermit Gosnel, the king of third trimester abortions.
It's a horror movie, really.
It's like an action thriller.
But the things this guy did to babies, like they had trouble showing it in the movie.
And it's important that people see this movie, but they don't see this movie because Nick Cercy is a right-winger and those guys aren't human and we don't care what they have to say.
We don't feel any sort of intimacy with them.
Oh, yeah?
Well, he just got a role in a show called Justified where he plays like a cool.
Hey, I already mentioned Capital Punishment.
Oh, Dean Kane's in there, too.
He's a right-winger guy.
Yeah, Dean Kane's doing it.
I should have included him in this.
Go to 2.5.
There he is.
Where are you going?
I can only find it on TV.
Oh, hell no.
Hell no.
Get back over here.
First thing we're going to do is we're going to acknowledge that this guy is awesome.
What?
He shoots the Otonin, fakes his own death in a spectacular fashion, pushes a guy out of an airplane while he's flying it, parachutes in Harlem's County.
Not so out there now, is he?
Not so far right, is he?
And his latest fucking masterpiece, his latest brilliant tactical move, was getting Tom Hanks to hire him to do a movie.
So here he is with Tom Hanks.
Okay, bring me back.
There he is.
Nick Searcy is in a movie with Tom Hanks now.
Everyone is going to see this fucking movie.
And everyone's going to realize, wait, this guy seems like a cool guy.
What else did he do?
Oh, he did Gosno.
He did Capital Punishment.
He's a real deal nigga.
He's a human being.
Now we have Tom Hanks here.
You see what's happening?
Politics is downstream from the culture.
We've become humanized.
We always had Chad Hanks with White Boy Summer.
Now we have Tom Hanks.
This is getting serious, you guys.
Pretty cool, huh?
That's badass, man.
It's weird that my only fear with this whole pattern is that Owen gets wasted and he ends up making out with Christina.
Or Christina sees this and realizes that the relationship isn't real.
Oh, yeah.
But so that's ballsy of him, though, to go out.
Like, we always thought Project Veritas has balls.
Going to Hollywood and pretending to be in a relationship with someone.
Deep cover.
All right, let's do some good old-fashioned racism.
All right.
I'm a black female.
What other different...
What else could I have done to piss you off?
Black woman?
This is really inconvenient.
If AOC was white, she'd be a 10.
Thought that was interesting.
Is it just the hair color in the eyes, or are there other structural differences?
Oh, they made the lips a little more full, I guess?
Yeah.
It's amazing what you can do to a fucking face.
Imagine you met the woman on the right on a Tinder dating site, and then you go and visit her, and it's that?
Oh.
That's always the hot girl and her friend.
I would always end up with the friend.
Last week or earlier this week, we were talking about Brittany Griner, and I said, I want her back.
Pissed off a lot of baby monsters.
I don't know, it makes us look weak when Moscow can take our people.
When you have a passport, I want you to care.
Like auto warm beer.
He did do something wrong.
He was stealing a sign.
But we got to get you back.
Sorry.
Now, I read an interesting article where they said, no, don't take her back because the offers that we're getting, I didn't realize this.
When you get someone back, you exchange a prisoner.
I thought you could just strong-arm them and say, give me that fucking basketball player back or we're going to have trouble.
Maybe even some sort of tariff thing or this deal won't go through.
But apparently Putin wants this guy who's in for 25 years for trafficking weapons to kill Americans.
Go down a bit?
Stop.
Victor Bout, a Russian arms dealer, serving a 25-year sentence for conspiracy to kill U.S. citizens and providing aid to a terrorist organization.
She can rot if that's the kind of deals we're talking about.
I love how everything has to be about race.
We don't care about her because she's black.
Yeah, I know, I know.
She's a liberal.
She's a radical lefty.
But she's an American first and foremost.
And I'm with Greg Kelly on that.
Get her back, but get her back for free.
We don't make deals with terrorists.
I thought this was amazing.
And dude, you've got to do a man out in the street in the South Bronx around this studio.
Just walk outside with your phone.
I don't know.
Give people a...
You can have a dollar and say, we're paying a dollar to anyone who gets this right.
I'll give you like a bunch of singles.
I think I'll have to give you three.
Okay.
And just ask them questions, like the easiest question in the world.
Well, let's see if you can answer this.
Stop.
Who was before Reagan in American presidents?
Fucking, I want to say Carter.
Correct.
Is it?
Oh, okay.
The biggest loser ever before Joe Biden.
Now, I would blow my dad to have Jimmy Carter as president.
It's before Ronald Reagan.
Oh, gosh.
Um.
Hitler.
Hitler wasn't a president of the United States, and thank God for that.
Benjamin Franklin?
It rhymes but larder.
Just stop.
President Barter?
President Barter.
But Hitler, is she joking?
No.
What kind of subhuman thinks Hitler was president of the United States?
Could you possibly know less about anything?
Honestly.
Like, can you go poo?
Do you know how to brush your teeth?
Hitler?
He was the worst president we ever had.
That was a dark time in America's history.
Does she think America's the whole world?
Oh, yeah.
World War II was a civil war.
Color TVs came out right after him.
Abraham Lincoln.
It wasn't Honest Abe.
Who was it?
Jimmy Carter.
Never heard that name in my life.
Who was the president of the TV?
You know that they edited out a lot of black people in that one, for sure.
And then they wound up with a lot of black people.
Yeah.
This one's pretty old, but everything has to be about race, right?
And this is a road rage incident where this left-wing Karen bumps into a guy who, I don't know if he's Indian.
He looks more Mexican to me, but maybe he's part Indian.
And he decides to change the whole discussion and make it about colonization.
Has everyone seen this?
Sorry, it's so old.
3-0, 3-5.
I don't have time to waste on colonizing.
She told me to go.
Do you see that?
Because we don't drive Oregon.
We're fucking kind, and we make space.
And as someone who's come here as old, I'm so tired of people driving like you just did.
Alright, get out of my face.
Get out of my face.
Admit you're fucking wrong, and that it's not a race thing.
Admit that you're driving race.
Admit you're right.
I mean, people colonize their mindset.
It's not about race.
Yellow race.
It is not about peace, yelling at me.
Henry Kissinger, can't they both lose?
Oh, so it's on me.
So stop me.
Don't fucking race.
Do not call the race.
Shut up.
And don't even get in her face.
Do not get in her face.
You're taking out pain and oppression on me right now.
You're taking out your pain and oppression on me right now.
Oh, man.
If I was there, I would grab some popcorn.
If you want anything to change, if you want...
Shut up!
It's not on me who teams, it's on you and your colonizer mindset.
So get the man!
Fuck out of my face!
You miss!
You white lady!
You white lady!
Oh, this sounds like Bill Burr's comedy special.
Is this friends who kill?
Conversation!
Then you'd be walking fucking colonizers!
It's not on me!
It's on you and your people!
I'm not taking any fucking...
I'm not taking any directions from a white lady!
Everyone needs to hear how angry you are, but it's just a drink.
You're trying to use it as an insult?
White woman sounds better than white lady.
Why can't you just walk in my face?
You're in my face.
You're not in my space!
Get out!
You're breathing my air!
You fucking colonized it!
Get out of my face!
And don't give me those white tears and the fake white people!
You don't know the pain of my people!
So get out!
You don't know the pain of my people?
Get out!
I'm gonna stand here with you until you walk.
Is he Mexican?
He was wrong or Indian.
You told me!
She told me to get back to where I came from!
Where am I from?
I'm from White Street, France!
Where she and her white colonizing mindset pump me in!
Oh, I don't care.
Oh, I don't care.
That was annoying.
That's part one.
I hate everybody in that video.
I hate the cars.
Let's enjoy the endless part two.
It's like.
Oh.
Hey, Tony.
Hey, what's up?
Oh, fuck.
My cheek hurts.
You know why?
No.
From sparring?
Oh, did you spar?
No.
I got off the train yesterday, and the train was starting to start up again, and I was thinking, what if I, and it's like, vom, vom, voom, voom, what if I jumped in between the cars right now?
Like, would I fall onto the tracks?
Or is there a little, I guess there's a platform there.
I wonder if I would hit my head on the thing.
And as I was thinking about this, I went and walked into a pole.
I was walked so hard my glasses came off.
That's awesome.
I've got like a bruise here now.
You were sparring with some of the environment.
Yeah, I was sparring with a sign that said, watch where you're going.
Yeah.
I saw the sign and it took off my glasses.
I actually didn't see the sign.
I lied.
What is the reality?
She told me to come back to where I came from just because I made a simple mistake.
I think she might go back to your state because you're not from Oregon.
Alright, I'm out.
I'm out.
Then go.
But I hope you have a conversation about this.
Okay, shut the fuck up.
I hope you shut the conversation.
I could shove you.
That is pretty funny.
I hope you shut the fuck up.
You slammed his fucking seatbelt in his door.
Yeah, that sucks.
Kind of kills the impact.
Yeah.
Especially because you know that's going to be a hard slam too, so there's some damage there just thinking about that.
Shut the fuck up.
I hope you shut the fuck up.
And I hope you can.
And I hope you go back to fucking gear up here.
Channel your anchor in a productive way because dude, wow, he closed the door on that fucking thing.
No, he moved the seatbelt.
Why does his door look like that?
That's not how a door closes.
There he goes.
Detective shitty strikes.
No, dude, he fucking...
Look at that.
It's not on me.
That's what I'm talking about.
Oh, okay.
That door is open.
It's not on me.
Crushing a belt.
That'd be good if we do a series of videos where we watch videos and we totally miss the point.
And we're like, that guy's wheels are...
There's no tread.
Can you believe what we've done to women?
Like, we've made them these pedants, these pedantic pussies who just lecture everyone about conversations.
Ugh.
Go ahead.
Admit when you're wrong.
You alright?
Okay, but that's not the point.
You alright?
You did a lot of lecturing.
Look at her stupid sandals.
I'm sorry.
Stop.
Stop.
Interdependence day.
XYZ love.
Look at all that.
You are our dream.
Go to the trees.
What have we done to women?
We've made them horrible, annoying cunts.
Thank God she didn't get married and have kids.
She can roam through the streets lecturing people.
Read, read, read.
She loved that moment too.
She did not want it to end.
I had a stunning interaction today.
Did you?
Go to the trees.
I'd rather be here now.
Visualize world peace.
Why?
Yeah, you're not a part of it.
Yeah, you're a colonizer.
Weather to the water.
Okay, this was pretty interesting.
3-7.
I shit on condoms a lot, but that's because I know that you guys don't get women pregnant.
You physically shit on condoms.
Yeah.
Take shit.
Actually, I did.
Oh, yeah, that's right.
I did.
I shat in.
Well, I put shit in a condom and I sucked it, and you guys didn't believe me that it was real.
But in other cultures, I don't advocate for avoiding condoms because what this guy means is come in a girl, and if she gets pregnant, well, then you got a son.
So what?
Make a bunch of sons.
No.
Hey, no.
Anyway, you can pull it up.
No, that's 3-8.
Which one now?
3-7.
It's the one after the one you just showed.
I do not fuck with condoms.
They just feel weird.
Why the fuck you use a condom anyway, man?
When you was fucking during Corona, did you wear a condom?
Hell no.
Because I'm seeing two yo's out here that only mean one thing.
Somebody want to unprotect.
Live by the sword, die by the sword, man.
Facts.
Condoms are for pussy.
I do not fuck with condoms.
And then we have Christian Walker.
Now, Christian Walker is a raving homosexual.
He's Herschel Walker's son.
And he has a different take on this kind of behavior.
That's the guy we want, by the way.
Yes, I know.
He got banned.
We're going to take him.
Instead of ran off to fathers, it would be great if you stayed home and raised your kids instead of ran off to bang a bunch of women who weren't your baby mama.
Stay home and raise your freaking kids.
Your kids need a father.
Get back home.
Get back home.
If you take out your thing and you get a woman pregnant, guess what?
The party days are over.
The acting foolish days are over.
You go get a freaking job and you support your new family.
Get home.
Raise your kids.
Kids need a man in the house raising them.
They need a good dad.
They need a loving father.
And while you're out taking shots of vodka and tequila, living your high life, your kid is suffering.
Get home.
Get home.
Raise your kids, fathers.
Herschel Walker, his dad is an accomplished conservative politician now, post-football.
Married his college sweetheart, but they divorced after 19 years of marriage.
So that's bad.
And then we discover that Christian Walker's father, Herschel, has two additional sons and a daughter, which he did not publicly acknowledge prior to his 2022 campaign for the U.S. Senate.
Before these other children were reported, Walker had said that fatherless households were a major, major problem in African-American communities.
Speaking of fathers, African-American communities, did you know that Eric Holder's son is convicted of first-degree murder against Nipsey Hussell?
What?
Yeah.
There's no way you would have heard about that.
Is that the Eric Holders?
Yeah.
You know, the guy who says kick them while they're down or whatever?
Or we go lower?
By the way, Eric Holder is responsible for removing race from crime statistics.
Right.
So that's why every time we talk about blacks in crime, we're using shit from like 2006.
Because him and Obama said, let's just erase that from the books.
I'm glad he killed Nipsey Hustle.
That guy's annoying.
No, dude.
I didn't like Nipsey Hustle either because he's just a rapper.
But this song slaps.
Last time and I checked.
I've been self-made from the dribble.
I was bent saying I'm a killer.
I don't like the rap part, but the chorus is good.
That's just a pile of garbage.
It's the closest I can get to liking.
How is that good?
I heard that now with rap, they just find out what your neighborhood is.
And they're like, where are you from?
Crenshaw?
What Boulevard?
38th Street born and raised.
Sorry, too safe.
Bye.
But if he's like 36th Street born and raised, they're like, hmm, that's a really dangerous part of town.
Okay, you're in.
You done time?
Yep.
Oh, wait.
We're wrong.
I'm wrong.
He's not related.
I heard that on a show.
All right, ladies and gentlemen, Ryan Rivera has a perfect record.
This is a flawless episode of terrible contributions to the show, including things that he heard as a rumor and didn't look up.
On a political show, like it was Tim Cool or something.
A show more that they pride themselves on being correct about news more than us.
Okay, so please, new rule, don't say things on the show that you haven't verified.
Okay?
Okay?
Yes.
So here's something I've been meaning to get to for a while.
It's one of the craziest things.
Canadian schools are now teaching hate, not the merits of hate, but the dangers of hate in school.
And there is a pamphlet going around to every student in the entire country on how to avoid racism.
They're very specific about racism, anti-black racism.
They're not worried about anti-white racism.
They make that clear inside.
That's not an issue.
That's kind of a new thing, isn't it?
Where we talk about racism and only involves a few people.
Uh-oh.
Uh-oh.
We should also verify links.
That's a bummer.
I wanted to see what that was.
Was it a PDF from the school?
Well, I got actually, I did take a picture of the spot.
But this was a very long PDF.
It's like 60 pages.
And maybe if you look up the mailbag, Canadian Schools.
And there was so much gold in there.
Maybe if I just look up hate.
Yeah, here we go.
The letter is Anti-Hate Government Brochure Handed Out to Kids.
And it's called Confronting and Preventing Hate in Canadian Schools at nationbuilder.com.
Because it's funny that they took it down because I was going to sue them.
Our work is made possible in part thanks to a grant from the Anti-Racism Action Program.
So they get all this money and they just sit and Google shit and look at Wikipedia and put together a pamphlet.
So the section on me is they're talking about hate groups in Canada and they list a bunch of real ones and then they say the Proud Boys.
Proud Boys was started in 2016 by Gavin McInnes and has since gained notoriety since the 2017 white supremacy rally in Charlottesville.
You see how what they do there?
That's like Ben Smith at the beginning.
Is his name Ben Smith?
Me it's not.
Now I got to look that up because it's going to bother people.
I'll get it.
They don't say it's a white supremacist group.
They say it's gained notoriety since then.
Trap Music and Chicken Fries has also gained notoriety since that rally.
So has the new fucking Elvis movie.
But they place it there so your brain, this is called mind control, so your brain goes, oh, well, I presume it's gained notoriety since then because that was their rally.
And Donald Trump's call to stand back and stand by at the 2020 presidential debate.
They also played a central role.
So now it just reads, you played a central role in Charlottesville.
They also played a central role in the January 6th violent insurrection at Capitol Hill.
In 2017, they disrupted an Indigenous event on Canada Day in Halifax.
No.
They asked questions to people who were having an anti-Canada Day rally in Halifax.
They were very civil about it, and they had a flag that said, fuck Canada.
These guys were all in the military, second generation military, and they didn't like that someone was shitting on their country and their flag on that same day.
But because one of the lunatics called herself Chief Grizzly Mama, they called it an indigenous thing.
And so they all got fired and quit.
They are responsible for numerous instances of violence at rallies.
They are a group of predominantly white young men.
Now, if you're a young person in school and you read about a white supremacy group that's predominantly white, don't you go, can we extrapolate on that, please?
With known chapters in Ontario, Manitoba, and Alberta, their mottos include West is best.
See, these fucking idiots are doing a good ad for white supremacy.
Because all of these things sound awesome.
West is best, glorify the entrepreneur, venerate the housewife, and I won't apologize for creating the modern world.
And then you hear Donald Trump's into them and you go, I guess I'm a white supremacist.
You dummies are advertising exactly what you think you're out to fight, and you're making it sound awesome.
Some chapters have closed down since the Canadian government declared the Prowboys a terrorist entity in 2021.
However, given that it is a widespread set of beliefs among the far-right wing, it's anticipated that the ideology will manifest itself in a different way under a different banner.
Whatever the fuck that means.
Deco.
All right, let's go to the war on kids.
It's been a long app, but you know, we took Monday off.
Tuesday was off the cuff.
Got a lot to catch up on, folks.
We want to stay informed.
And my pocket square keeps sinking.
Hello, fam!
I had a text page upgrade.
Who wants to pamp my bag?
We are living in an ageism era where children are seen as human garbage.
Regulations to indoctrinate American school children with poisonous and divisive left-wing doctrine.
Fun your feet, soldier!
Fun your feet!
I really like that font.
Did you make that?
No.
That looks like Big Brother or something like that.
But I'll check it out.
So this is Ancient Chinese Secret, but it's fucking intense.
A sexual pleasuring class.
This was in a place in Washington State, about two hours north of Tacoma, right by the Canadian border, small town.
I forget what it's called.
School board member is holding a sexual pleasure class for kids as young as nine at her all-ages sex shop.
There is no such thing as an all-ages sex shop.
Could I have the firearm, please?
Let's read the first thing.
I can't believe I'm seeing the word nine and dildo so close together.
Workshops are divided by age and topics and will vary for developmental appropriateness.
Topics covered in this two-day workshop may include healthy relationships and relationship models, the science of puberty, consent and communication.
Could this sound more groomery?
What is consent?
It's not really what people think it is.
Sometimes consent can be after the fact when they realize they loved it, but they were saying no at first.
Gender and sexual identities.
That's important for nine-year-olds.
Sexual anatomy for pleasure and reproduction.
Reproduction?
What is sex?
Solo and partnered sexual activities.
This sounds like it's written by Nambla.
Safer sex for all kinds of sexual activities.
The ethics and realities of sexualized media and pornography.
$50 sliding scale available for people of all genders and identities.
Oh, good.
And then the next...
Bellingham.
That's the name of the town.
Let me see the picture next.
That's the wink wink boutique.
Get the fuck back in your fucking hole!
Now!
You guys are not going to believe this.
I have a hunch some of you know this.
Kids are not sexual.
Do you remember having sex when you were like 16?
It was not a fuck fest.
I lost my virginity at 17.
It was considered very late in my community.
And it was very awkward.
There was no moves.
Maybe it's different now with porn, but there was no cool moves going on.
We were both very nervous.
It lasted a few seconds.
I was freaked out by the way it felt.
It went in and sideways or something.
I guess I jizzed in a condom.
I don't even remember.
In fact, and this might just be Canada, Ottawa, and Montreal.
But I sort of felt like they didn't start getting good at it, if you will.
Like getting into it, I didn't feel like that happened in time.
20s.
All of my teen sex was like, oh, sorry, ow, out.
And I like, hold on, I'm coming.
Like, I don't think they would even initiate it until I was in my 20s.
Anyway, they're treating that stage where you're like, all right, let's get down to brass tacks.
How about a butt plug?
How about a fucking ball gag?
How about I fucking lick your ass while I put a dildo in your pussy?
They're making that thing, which you should get to 25.
That's a late 20s, 30s, 40s thing.
They're making all that for nine-year-olds.
Nine-year-olds, I've said this a million times, when there's a kiss scene in a movie, they go like this.
They don't like any of that shit, and it's genetic.
God put that in their DNA because he didn't want them getting fucked.
So please stop it.
I swear to God, if it's the last thing I do, I'm going to get my hands around your throat.
That scared me.
You're like, no, not me, Alex.
I didn't say that.
What did I do?
I'm the good guy.
I've always been a big defender of you.
I will eat your ass.
Oh, dude, that new movie, Alex's War.
I'll eat your ass.
It's showing here at the end of the month, I believe.
Oh, yes, yes.
But the premiere is in Austin soon.
It's by Navad.
What's his name?
Nadav, yeah.
Nadav.
I love that guy.
I hate that name.
Just call him his other name.
We won't say it, but he's got another name.
Oh, good.
Yeah.
Vaden?
It's better backwards, even.
That's so fucking funny.
So true.
Do you have the clip?
Oh, you want to.
Yeah, if I'm talking about a movie, let's show the trailer.
Alex's War.
It's Alex's War.
And I love how the left thinks that one little thing, one mistake, just ends you.
So the Sandy Hook mistake means Alex Jones, the other 700,000 hours of him talking about bullshit.
The story you're about to see is true.
This is reality.
Truth is stranger than fiction.
I'm the most banned, most demise media person in the world.
Alex Jones is a fake.
And he's a performance artist.
I'm perceived as a clown, the nut, the maniac.
On his website, InfoWars, he tells Harry Paranoya.
The ticket's most offensive theories.
Alex Jones claims that 9-11 and the Oklahoma City bombings were inside jobs.
Don't you stand for America, sir?
He said me and Hillary are demons.
You are.
Ain't that something?
You're burning hell.
I met him back in the 1990s.
I knew right away he was going to be a star.
I saw all these conspiracy theorists that were talking about the New World Order.
I thought that's what I'll do.
That turned out to be bullshit, huh?
Is that a new world order early on that I really wanted to wage war on?
You're lying to the public.
It's disgusting.
Well, she takes Alex.
Everything's a war.
That's the way the universe works.
And everything is propaganda.
I don't trust Donald Trump, but I agree with probably 95% of what Donald Trump says.
Your reputation's amazing.
I will not let you down.
That's when the media took the gloves off.
Alex Jones said the Sandy Hook shooting, which claimed the lives of 20 children, was fake.
I try to tell the truth, and sometimes I'm wrong.
Did the New York Times get in trouble for consciously lying about WMDs that then led to a war, killed tens of thousands in conflict?
No.
For the attempts to deplatform us.
You look like Sam Kinnison.
The CIA, the FBI following me around.
All right, second one.
Anyway, we should all check that out.
My body, my choice.
This is exactly the same as someone with Down syndrome saying, my body, my choice.
This is one of the most disturbing videos.
We talked about this with one of the callers last night.
But abortions are to prevent kids from being alive.
So to see a kid joining an abortion rally is particularly alarming.
And that father needs to get his fucking ass kicked.
Also, my body, my choice means if I fuck a dude and he comes in me, I should have the right to get rid of the baby.
I don't want a kid talking about what to do if someone comes in you.
Wait, actually coming from a kid, she's correct because it's her body, even if she's in a pregnant mother.
So it should be her choice as a baby.
She didn't realize it's a pro-life rally.
So if her mom had a choice, she wouldn't have a choice if her mom had a choice.
My choice.
That's pro-life.
All right.
This is a fucking long app.
Let's do the feminism.
Shit.
Damn it.
The long-ass motherfucker.
Who here identifies as a feminist?
We are the storm.
The very form of change that the world has been waiting for.
Who said I was too pretty to fight?
And that's toxic masculinity if you don't realize how your behavior is hurtful.
Maybe there's hot chicks in the audience at our shows because we talk about this and we talk about beauty a lot.
Hmm.
You think the ugly ones stay home or something?
The ugly ones don't like the subject of beauty because they know they don't fare well.
So earlier, Tucker was talking about who he hates, and Ben Smith was implying it's blacks, and he was saying it's actually you and old basically spinsters, boomer-angry woman liberals.
Amanda Marcott is a perfect example of this.
I've taken her to court for calling Proud Boys white supremacists and spent a lot of money telling her to watch what the fuck she says.
And it worked.
She doesn't talk about me anymore.
But I thought this was funny.
Back from Trump Country, comma, why is there a comma there?
And can confirm what I long suspected.
The trans panic is the new version of what was decades of the Title IX panic.
In both cases, it's about conservative men's heavy dependence on myths of male strength as the main source of self-esteem.
So the idea that men are stronger than women is a myth.
And we don't want women participating in male sport because they'll kick our ass.
And by the way, back from Trump Country, she's implying that she talked to all these cool Midwesterners and got a good gauge on what the culture is.
She talked to her dad.
And her dad said a bunch of logical shit about how Title IX ruined sports for everyone, especially women.
And yeah, Title IX, remember what Title IX is?
It's we need as much money and attention going into women's sports as men's sports, which meant if this team had an awesome foot, this school had an awesome football team and like three girls that play lacrosse, we have to put both attention on, the same attention on both.
Okay, so you just killed the boys' football team.
And now these women are running around with gold lacrosse sticks.
Click on her picture?
Of course there's a fucking cat in it.
You wasted your life.
You wasted your life.
You are childless.
You look like a dude.
Your bangs are gross.
Your boyfriend dumped you.
Okay.
Sorry, go back.
For the entire time I was growing up, there was a lot of anger at Title IX, which came down to this.
If women participated fully in sports, it might expose that the differences between male and female bodies aren't as vast as the patriarchy wants us to believe.
Have we not had this truth hammered down our throats?
Even on this show with the female skateboarder who was male and the female track and field black dudes who were just like dudes with long hair, they just put a bunch of fucking rope in their braids and said, I'm a woman.
No, you're a fast fag.
In particular, aging and out-of-shaped men relied heavily on the myth that having a penis and an XY chromosome meant you were stronger, healthier, and more vigorous than literally every woman on the planet.
Yeah.
Keeping women from building muscles helped maintain the myth.
Keeping women from building muscles.
Could you be more deluded?
This woman's job is storytelling, basically, and her job is to impart knowledge to other people after doing research.
And this is what she comes up with.
You're incompetent.
After decades of women in sports, the resistance to letting cis women demonstrate vitality has eroded.
But that need to believe the XY chromosome is basically magic persists.
Okay, Amanda, let's fight.
I got the ring.
We're the same strength.
Let's spar, headgear, and all.
Will it be a normal fight?
No.
I'll clobber you and then I'll feel like shit for two days.
So now the XY makes you a superhero myth is maintained by keeping a strict gender separation of men and women.
Like, talk about a cold take.
We are keeping women out of our sports.
Okay, why don't you, let's get you in football.
How about you play tackle football at their nearest high school, Amanda?
And we'll see how...
And then they go, men can continue to assert, since they'll never be tested, that they'd beat Serena Williams in a tennis match.
That's your example?
Serena Williams, basically Mike Tyson with long hair?
No, I don't think I could beat Serena Williams in a tennis match.
She's an absolute freak.
But all of male professionals in tennis could beat Serena Williams.
And tennis is a weird sport, too, because it's not that muscular.
But if you mixed men and women's tennis, you know men would be at the top, right?
Now, this sport relies heavily on upper body strength.
How does it fare?
Not great for the ladies.
Look at this myth.
Women are kicking ass.
Holy shit, imagine being in the audience.
Their own ass.
Yeah.
I'll just go down the side.
She can barely go down the dirt hill.
Okay.
You got it?
You're doing it.
No, you give up.
And you're down.
Holy shit, I would be laughing.
She can do that.
Yay, I did it.
Puts up her hand.
Amazing.
I don't know if you want to see the men's.
Yeah, I'd love to see the men's.
When I had my first son, I presumed he'd be doing this, and I'd be at these matches.
Turned out to be baseball.
Oh, well.
Oh, they're going to wipe out.
Look at them.
They're so scared.
Look at them wipe out.
Look at this.
He left the door open, but Nate did not make him pay.
Slightly different course.
Missing entire jumps.
Now, there's no it's not really a fair comparison.
This is a different skill in a sense.
Oh, look at this jump coming up.
I would think that would be the case.
I'm glad the women aren't doing that course.
They'd be fucking dead.
And so that.
Wee!
I think if Adams can keep the differential ones down to a second course.
Oh, here's the direct comparison.
This is the exact course.
Oh, good.
Still waiting for a wipeout.
One girl went through the...
Still anticipating a wipeout.
You got another one over?
Okay.
They're now at the second lap, the men.
What a myth.
Can you believe men are hiding from Serena Williams on the dirt bike track?
Well, men stop them from being good at this.
Yeah.
Every time they tried to get on the bike, they pushed them off and gave them.
Yeah, they make it illegal.
They give them pie ingredients.
Like, this is Amanda Marcott's world.
Just let us show you.
Okay, you suck.
I mean...
And, you know, men are ultimately benevolent.
And we don't like seeing this.
We're like, okay, let's have a different course for you.
And they're like, no, we can do it.
Oh, look, one guy had a problem.
He's off.
Oh, she just kind of gave up.
Now she's just kind of walking the bike.
Pathetic.
So Amanda Marcott is obviously a washed-up hag who ruined her life and wasted it writing for fucking salon.
What a waste of time.
But another example, this is Wendy Williams.
This woman, the childless woman, I think actually Wendy does have a kid, but she's had like a bunch of terrible marriages that have gone down the drain.
And the kid's not around and the dad's not around.
And she works all the time and she's not a housewife.
We can't venerate her.
But we can vet her.
And she fails.
Her brain has just turned to mush.
Now, this could just be an isolated story of mental illness, but I can't help but think it's what happens when a woman chooses a career, no matter how exciting that career is, over being a mom.
And this is an amazing interview because you can put it fucking anywhere.
Ms. has kind of bid farewell to television.
We know that already, but there is a plan she has.
She has a big plan.
It does not involve television.
It does involve communication.
It involves communication.
It involves Wendy doing a show, not a TV show, and a very profitable one she believes it will be.
So without further ado, let's bring in the guest of honor to tell us all about her plans.
Wendy Williams joining us on TMZ Live once again.
Wendy, it is great to see you.
Welcome back.
Hey, Wendy.
Well, welcome to my formal apartment.
Thank you.
We are duly impressed.
So let's get right into it.
That's a big statement for somebody who's been a fixture on television that you're using from more than a decade.
So tell us a very successful one.
So Morton and I were talked, and I was like, you know, I've got enough money to do something else.
And what I've never done, podcasts, which, by the way, podcasts everyone has.
But when you're famous, podcasts will make more money for me being famous.
Or showing her fail.
The Wendy Williams Show.
So, podcast.
Where will I go?
I'm not sure.
Europe.
You know, the France.
You're doing a podcast, but where are you going to go?
Oh, I'll do a podcast in the France.
No one asks where you're going to do your podcast.
That's kind of the whole point.
And yeah, we see your ring.
We got it.
It's a very expensive ring.
It's a matter of time.
She's not lonely.
I apologize.
That was a burpann fart, by the way.
Wherever I want to go.
Also, I know Oz.
I know, you know, many people.
Many people.
Me too.
Dr. Oz, by the way.
You know Dr. Oz?
Of course.
Yeah.
No.
We're TMZ, but we've been here.
I've been in New Jersey so many times I can't account.
Also, you know.
It's always a lot of fun.
Let's get started.
Our first caress.
What a lazy fake feint.
Plenty of people.
Black things.
So I'm ready to like, fortunately, I have enough money.
I could do nothing at all and just relax in my gorgeous apartment.
By the way, doesn't it look gorgeous?
Oh, do you see me sitting on my throne from the window?
Is that your throne you have there?
Excuse me.
Oh, now we can see it.
Well, all right.
Glad to see you took that with you.
So I want to say something.
It's interesting to me because I used to do radio.
Before I did TV, I did radio.
I feel bad for her.
She's probably on drugs, though.
So there's nothing really to pity there.
Well, if you don't want to feel bad about women, check out, we talked about this the other day, Michelle Wolf playing God.
She said, I felt like God when I killed my baby.
And I go, yeah, that's why it's evil.
I said this on Getter.
You're playing God.
Yeah, I think I mentioned this on Compound Censored.
Okay, let's jump to my pet Biden.
Ooh, that face.
Last segment of the show.
Correct.
Oh, good.
I'm glad we're covering this lot of important shit.
Biden, on him I can depend.
My pet.
Biden.
A monster of a president.
He's big and foo and sleepy.
But a friendly monster too.
My pet.
Biden.
Wait, what?
That doesn't rhyme.
Wouldn't it be weird meeting Joe Biden?
Hey, man.
I'd want to drag it out.
I'd kiss his ass because I'd want to drag it out for as much as possible.
As long as possible.
But you'd also feel like I'm with a demon.
My only question with him is, what percentage is demon and what percentage is just raging incompetence?
He's literally selling us out four or five.
We're low on gas.
I'm spending $100 a tank in the middle of a historic gas crisis.
Joe Biden shipped 1 million barrels of oil from the American Petroleum Reserve to a Chinese company his son Hunter has a large investment in.
Move your mouse, Ryan.
This is by far the worst scandal of the regime.
The only answer is impeachment.
Pass it on.
And then he's got the article that's talking about that.
Steve Binnen was just swatted in D.C., by the way.
Oh, really?
How come we don't get swatted?
I want to be swatted.
No, you don't.
That's the problem.
That's a joke.
That's a joke.
Oh.
Where's Hunter at the White House?
There's no crack there.
So Hunter obviously profits from that sale.
And what happens when Hunter profits?
The big guy gets money.
So while we are suffering, while our bank accounts are being emptied at the gas tank, he is taking the remaining gas, selling it to China for a sweet under-the-table deal.
I say, is it evil?
Is it incompetent?
It's both.
And then we've all seen this, right?
4-6, he said I never discuss business, my son's overseas business.
Why is there a voicemail of the president talking to his son about his overseas business dealings if the president has said he's never spoken to his son about his overseas business?
How many times have you ever spoken to your son about his overseas business dealings?
I've never spoken to my son about his overseas business dealings.
And everybody's looked at it and said there's nothing there.
Ask the right questions.
Well, first I'll say that what the president just said stands.
So they have never discussed with my son or my brother or anyone else anything has to do with their business.
And secondly, business dealings.
And he says, I think you're clear.
I thought the article released this thing on online.
It's going to be printed to one of the times was good.
I need to clear.
How is that not him talking to his son about his overseas business dealings?
We're not from this podium.
I am not going to talk about alleged materials from the laptop.
Why is there a voicemail?
So just a sea of incompetence.
An incompetent rube criminal stealing our money and doing sweet deals with our enemies.
China's our enemy.
He's not doing it with Canada.
He's doing it with our arch enemy who has rocket silos, who has military artillery pointed at us right now.
And he's like, they're not the bad guys.
They're the dictionary definition of the bad guys.
But of course, as he steals our gas and gives it to other people, and we've all seen the graph of the gas, right?
Price going up, up, up, up, up.
Ukraine war is here.
Even if it was 100% responsible for the increases during the war, which it isn't, that's still like 2% of all of this.
Deep.
Actually, the screen's backwards, right?
So it'd be like it would go.
Don't worry, we're going to have a whiteboard for you soon.
The whiteboard would still be backwards.
Yeah, but you switch it around.
We got a long way to go because of inflation, because of the, I call it, the Putin tax increase.
Putin because of gasoline and all that grain he's keeping from being able to get to the market.
We got a long way to go.
It's Putin's fault.
And here he is.
Vice got some affirmative action hires to interview him.
And he says, drunk driving is not a felony.
Now, drunk driving is a misdemeanor.
Well, this is what it is in New York.
It's pretty much the same everywhere in the States.
It's a misdemeanor the first time.
Second time, it's a felony.
And if you kill someone the first time, it's a hell of a lot more than a fucking misdemeanor.
But he's decided that, no, it's never a felony.
Drive drunk.
That's my rule.
I got my own laws.
Arrest for the purpose of dealing with a felony that's committed, and I don't count drunk driving as a felony.
Good reaction, team.
You only arrest for the purpose of Guinness, because the law is different with respect to him.
Drunk driving is a felony if you hurt someone or if it's your second time.
And secondly, wait, we only arrest for felonies now?
What percentage of arrests are felonies?
It's probably fucking half, less?
That's a good question.
Too bad we don't trust Siri anymore.
We trust her enough to just passively listen to everything.
It's hard to find immediately.
Let's see.
What percentage of arrests are felonies?
Oh, how about arrests breakdown by misdemeanor?
Yeah, we can compare the two.
Am I going to have to look on my face?
How many arrests are felonies?
How many arrests are for felonies?
This isn't not good TB.
Four felonies.
Didn't help.
All right.
A big problem, a huge problem with Biden, of course, is that he's fucking ancient, which is why I'm not that excited about Trump coming back.
I would prefer DeSantis.
But check out this chart of how...
What's this now?
Felony arrests are way below misdemeanor arrests.
Yeah, that's what I assume.
Check out this list.
This is 5-0 of the ages of the Founding Fathers.
You probably know this.
I'm a Canadian-British immigrant, and I'm only learning shit like this now.
I knew they were young, but I didn't know James Monroe was 18.
20, 20, 21, 25, 30, 30, 33.
Thomas Paine, the ancient, 39.
Joe Biden is 79.
Nancy Pelosi is 82.
Chuck Schumer's 71.
I mean, 79.
If you're dying and you're 79, you're like, I had a good run.
Later, everybody.
And then, of course, we have the vice president who has really interesting things to say.
I've told you my theory about her, right?
She's dying for a t-shirt slogan that's going to put her in the history books.
She wants a, we have nothing to fear but fear itself.
So she always takes the words that are the words, and what are they?
They're the words.
She'll repeat a phrase many times, hoping it becomes this grand slogan.
And it's fucking retarded.
Just be Mike Pence.
Just like say a normal script and stop trying to make a bumper sticker every time you open your fucking mouth.
Is this where she's not burdened by the past of her?
We've got to take this stuff seriously, as seriously as you are, because you have been forced to have to take it seriously.
Turn it up.
The whole nation should understand and have a level of empathy to understand that this can happen anywhere in any peace-loving community.
And we should stand together and speak out about why it's got to stop.
Madam Vice President.
Thank you.
Okay, I don't know why I included that.
That sounded stupid.
You've seen the one where she showed it.
You know what she said?
We couldn't hear it.
She said, we have to take this stuff seriously, as seriously as you are, because you have been forced to take this seriously.
See if you can hear that.
It's a lot of background noise.
It's bottoming out.
We have to take this stuff seriously, as seriously as you are, because you have been forced to take this seriously.
And then we have Unburdened by What Has Been, 5-2.
Yes, this is the good one.
Odds and the obstacles.
We push to move forward.
That we are guided by what we see that can be unburdened by what has been.
That doesn't make sense.
Despite the odds and the obstacles.
This is the compilation of her saying that forever and ever, like a million kajillion times.
Not a joke!
That is not a joke!
That is a natural fact!
It is not a joke.
I'm not joking about this.
Not a joke.
No, really.
I mean it.
No, really, it is.
I mean it.
This is for real.
But all kidding aside.
No, I mean it.
I'm not kidding.
We got Jim Crow sneaking back in.
No, I mean it.
No, not a joke.
Think about it, guys.
It's not a joke.
Not a joke.
It's no joke.
Not a joke.
Not a joke.
Not a joke.
not a joke.
Not a joke.
Not a joke.
Not a joke.
I said this to someone at the bar the other day, and I was like, not a joke.
You know, like Joe Biden always says, and they go, I didn't know he says that.
How do you not know not a joke?
What are you, veto?
And then 5-3, this one you've seen, I hope, the Work Together one.
I think this is the compilation, but yeah.
Wait, what are you doing?
No, that's the compilation if anybody wants to see it.
Kamala Harris is certainly unburdened by much in the gray matter department.
That's another one she said.
I had it time coded, didn't I?
This one here?
Yeah, dude.
This is 30 seconds.
Oh, okay.
Climate crisis, which is why we will work together and continue to work together to address these issues, to tackle these challenges, and to work together as we continue to work operating from the new norms,
rules, and agreements that we will convene to work together on to galvanize global action.
With that, I thank you all.
This is a matter of urgent priority for all of us, and I know we will work on this together.
Thank you.
I just want to whisper in an ear that you make sure you say work together.
I'm doing a tour of the library here, and talking about the significance of the passage of time, right?
The significance of the passage of time.
So when you think about it, there is great significance to the passage of time.
Maria Bartola has been crying all day.
This is a new one two hours ago.
Oh.
Reads the prompter.
Power.
It is noteworthy that the percentage of women who register to vote and cast a ballot is consistently higher than the percentage of the men who do so.
End of quote.
Repeat the line.
Women are not without electoral hands or flip or four.
Repeat the line.
Percentage of men.
Go fuck yourself, San Diego.
Repeat the line.
Women are not without electoral and or political.
Or maybe precisely, not and/or.
See, him fucking up right there, is realizing that he fucked up, and he's like thinking and then also trying to speak.
Women are not without electoral.
That is consistently higher than the percentage of the men who do so.
End of quote.
Repeat the line.
Women are not without electoral and or political or maybe precise, not and/or or political power.
That's another saying: you, the women of America, can determine the outcome of this issue.
We are the global laughing stock.
Fucking Saudi Arabia is making fun of it.
Who typed a question mark on the teleprompter?
All right, it's time for the mailbag, folks, from this Super Marathon app.
Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dead.
Let's turn the price together's mailbag.
Let me touch it.
The AI might be smarter than we realize.
Hunter Biden smoking a crackpipe.
And it appears that Joe Biden is included in Hunter's addiction because the stress of this global corruption is not what Hunter can handle.
I've seen this with my buddies Waxy Gordon's grandson.
Waxi Gordon was a successful Jewish mobster in New York in the early 1900s, I guess.
Waxi Gordon's son was a failure.
He was a pussy.
And when he was invited into the mob, he couldn't hack it and started snitching like on day one.
So he went off to witness protection program shortly after inseminating his wife and making my buddy.
And I believe it's the same with Hunter.
Joe Biden is this demonic superpower.
And he says, all right, I'm going to be sniffing kids, possibly fucking kids, getting involved in all kinds of demonic globalism, setting up deals with our enemies, siphoning millions, if not billions of dollars from all these other superpowers.
He's definitely involved in the Ukraine bullshit.
And then he's like, all right, Hunter, you're old enough.
Let's do this.
And Hunter's in over his head.
He's going to Ukraine.
He's going to China.
He's getting involved in these hedge funds.
And he can't hack it.
So he becomes a drug addict trying to escape the stress of knowing that him and his dad could go to jail at any moment.
So Biden, Joe Biden, is the reason poor...
I'm starting to feel sorry for Hunter Biden.
He's not cut out for this life.
He's not a demonic globalist.
He's just a spoiled rich kid who wants to golf and maybe have an affair.
He'd be like, oh, and now you're going to start painting.
It's going to be real shitty.
It doesn't even have to be good.
So we could launder some more money.
He's like, fucking really?
It's like a come town take.
But it's very true.
Gavin AI art?
They always look like my state trooper friend Tim Dickman.
Oh, these are all amazing, by the way.
My favorite artist is a computer.
I can't believe it.
Good stuff, good stuff.
It's kind of vain to be sitting here looking at drawings of myself.
This is Pat Dixon Crime Report.
It's on authority.
We want Pat Dixon Crime Report on the show.
That would be sick.
Somebody with 67 followers did a poll.
184 votes.
Very strongly saying.
It's all easy for them to say.
Civil rights lawyer on Twitter: police shooting just filmed by Bystander near Beckley, West Virginia.
Go Beckley, Teppy.
Oh, we've got some breaking news.
Boo, boo, boo, boo, boo.
Please don't be black.
Please don't be unarmed.
He's got a gun.
He's got a gun.
He's acting like a lunatic, and he keeps turning around.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Wait, guys.
Good.
We won't have the city burned down.
Nothing wrong with that.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Lady, you should be pretty fucking scared in the car.
That's a perfectly normal shooting.
You don't drop your gun around cops?
I mean, what do you think is going to happen?
Trump clip.
Someone's sending in a Trump.
South Korea has done...
Turn it up.
Why is that?
I don't think that's true.
That is true.
And you said this morning that the White House said the U.S. passes South Korea virus testing.
Who are you with?
Yahoo News.
And it's not true per capita.
Do you want to respond to that?
If you have the numbers.
So Yahoo, gentlemen, I just want to make it clear that South Korea's testing was 11 per 100,000, and we're at 17 per 100,000.
Are you going to apologize, Yahoo?
That's why you're Yahoo and nobody knows what that means.
That's why you're Yahoo.
Let's get your numbers.
That's great.
That's why you're Yahoo.
I love when someone says, yeah, I don't think that's right.
You got your numbers wrong.
And they look it up and the numbers are wrong.
Because your first instinct, when someone says bullshit to you, or maybe not you, it's my first instinct.
I go, oh, really?
Holy shit.
Oh, she was stabbing the bodega guy in the back?
Fuck me.
That's insane.
Then you look it up.
No.
When your caller insulting Yahoo by just identifying them, that's why you're Yahoo.
That's why you're Ryan.
Hey.
Farrier, when your caller today mentioned, this was yesterday now, mentioned he was a Farrier, I went all fanboy.
I can watch Farrier's work all day long.
These may be too long, but they're good candidates for manporn.
Oh my God, I'm going to come.
Isn't this an indication that God fucked up if we have to give them shoes?
I guess we fucked up by making cement everything.
But name another animal where you got to give it shoes.
You got a bunch of shit in there.
I like how the horse realizes this is good for him and doesn't object.
Yeah.
There we go.
Anyway, we get it.
They're cool.
It's only recently I realized you cut their hooves because they're like a big nail, basically.
I didn't really know that back then.
It's so weird that this guy called us saying, is my job a useless waste of time?
Whoa, what do we got here?
A goat.
Oh, no, I'm sorry, donkey with overgrown hooves.
And then so you just cut that shit off.
I thought that was like part of their foot for a long time.
But that's just like a big old...
I don't want to disparage the creator of the universe, but what was the plan here, God?
Well, it's a symbiotic relationship.
Maybe there's a few shoes.
They're designed to be around rocks more, and that would knock them down a peg.
Like beavers, if they don't gnaw at wood, their teeth will grow to death.
Right.
Also, learning this about animals was fucked up.
A deer velvet.
It's just like hanging bloody shit.
Yeah.
Everyone's known that for a billion years, right?
Yeah.
Have you ever been to the country before?
Yeah, lived up there.
I just never seen velvet.
Alo, alo, aloo, mates.
Gab, I think your take on video games is spot on.
One of my buddies and I just nixed another guy from our group, and video games played a substantial role in our decision.
How do you nix a guy from the group?
I guess that's a younger dude thing.
I couldn't imagine like telling some old man to hang out with the bar.
Yeah, actually, John, you're gone.
Sorry, dude.
We all talked about it.
He's like, okay, can I still come to my bar?
This is the bar I go to.
Yeah, but you got to sit over there.
Okay, I guess I got to sit in a new seat.
All this guy ever does at home is play dumb video games as a girl, a goop portion of the time, I might add.
As a girl, a goop portion of the time, I might add.
What does that mean?
Oh, oh.
He plays video games as a girl a good portion of the time.
Please proofread your letters.
Okay.
And sit around pouting about how his life isn't going anywhere or he can't find any girlfriends.
Imagine my shock.
It wasn't a rare occurrence for me to find him playing video games that were so childish, it was a bit terrifying.
All this sort of explains his view of movies, too.
He never shuts up about the most random, useless theories and backstories about the actors or characters in any given movie.
He's also obsessed with shallow, juvenile romance movies and somehow thinks his love life will play out like a she's all that or some gay shit.
Anyhow, the final straw for me is when he stopped mere inches shy of expressing glee over the Uvalde shooting.
His reasoning?
It's less people that will grow up to be stupid.
What's stupider than watching rom-coms and playing video games?
He proceeded to express the same sentiments over school shootings in general.
In the beginning, needless to say, that's the last time we saw him.
When I do shows this long, I lose my facilities.
Point is...
In the beginning.
Point is, your take on these lunatics and the influence of video games isn't nuts.
I've seen it firsthand to a degree.
On another note, it always amazes me how these people can't handle anyone taking shots at their childish obsessions.
Yeah, that's how you know they're guilty, too.
If you call me, I don't think I'm an alcoholic.
I drink too much.
But if you call me an alcoholic, I go, eh.
If you call an alcoholic an alcoholic, they lose their fucking shit because you're right.
It's called hitting a little too close to home.
It's the same deal with Disney and Marvel fans.
Anytime I say anything remotely negative about video games, Marvel, or especially Disney, all I get is a bunch of, no, you won't ruin Disney for me.
And then he has an ugly drawing.
That meme guy.
You mentioned those old TJMS episodes, how you were just about crucified for the crime of criticizing a Disney cruise.
That happens anytime anything remotely related to Disney is mentioned.
People just don't want to hear it.
Fucking adults these days, man.
I get it, he says.
I get it, man.
Okay, last one.
Watch U.S. President Trump and Japan's PM Abe sit down for a traditional Japanese dinner.
Now, if you recall, when Obama met him, he almost broke his back bowing.
Do you have that?
I think Abe was president when, sorry, Prime Minister when Obama was president.
I think it was the same guy.
God, she was hot.
I mean, she's still hot, but she was a hot first lady.
What is this dumpling?
Thank you very much.
We've had a great time.
Turn it up today, and tomorrow is really the main event, very important event in the history of Japan.
It's over 200 years since something like this has happened, so it's a great honor to be representing the United States.
And the Prime Minister and I talked a lot today about trade and military and various other things.
I think we had a very productive day.
Likewise, will be a very productive day.
And I just want to thank you.
That was an incredible evening.
The United States contributed for the championship,
Sumo Championships.
And it was very nice.
We really enjoyed being there.
That was something to see these.
No teleprompter.
No reading the same line again.
And I've always wanted to see sumo wrestling.
So it was really great.
Thank you very much for being here.
Hey, there are buds.
Seemed like.
This is Obama bowing.
Oh, it wasn't him.
Well.
That I don't know.
It was Japan's emperor he bowed to.
Yeah.
Oh, these are all different people bowing to the emperor?
They're not bowing, actually.
They're shaking his hand.
Hey, buddy.
Hi, I'm not Japanese, so I'm not going to bow.
Yeah.
But I'll shake your hand.
Look at that.
Go back.
You skipped over Obama pretty quick.
Or is that a video?
Yeah, it's doing that.
It slowly shows more than a bit of him.
Yeah, it is weird.
Look at that.
That was a really crucial moment in American history, you know.
Remember that book?
Redneck Revolt or no, no, that's the Antifa group.
Redneck Nation or something?
Fuck, what the fuck was it called?
Where they researched why Trump won.
They thought it was racism, and they discovered, no, it was Obama constantly apologizing for us, and it was guns.
When Trump walked in front of the Queen, excuse me, bitch.
I'm not apologizing for Japan.
We saved lives with those bombs.
They were going to go till every single Japanese person was dead.
They were training women and children to fight.
They wanted us to kill nine-year-olds.
And we finally fucking slapped them and they went, Lula.
Okay, okay.
He wasn't supposed to walk in front of her or something?
I don't give a shit.
Fuck you.
Kiss my queens.
Suck my dick.
Look at my ass.
All right.
Final video.
5-5.
Oh, sorry.
Let's get to the final video.
Gosh.
A total breakdown of traditions.
It's called a society.
It's true.
Cool new sport.
I had never seen this before.
Fighting on top of a shipping container.
My only concern, of course, is what happens when you get knocked out.
I mean, isn't that how all bare knuckle boxing ends?
With knockouts?
But that looks like a pretty fun Saturday with the boys, does it not?
Talk about a white boy summer.
Now that we have Tom Hanks and all of Hollywood on our side, we can start organizing major events like this and getting them on ESPN.
We did it, guys.
We infiltrated Hollywood.
And now we're normal.
No, We're not normal.
We're the cognitive dissidents.
And I like it here.
You know, you lose a lot of friends in the Trump-American divorce, but you get to this point where it's all ride or die niggas.
And you look around you.
Everyone on your phone you can trust.
Everyone, you know that every person you're with, if there was a fist fight that broke out right now, they'd all be there with you, shoulder to shoulder.
That's a great feeling.
And when we do these shows and we meet these fans and we, sorry, baby monsters, and we hang out with these people, we're like, and you're like that too.
I don't even know you, but I know you.
That's what's so great about this community.
We're all ride or die niggas.
So let's have a fun weekend.
We worked hard for it.
And if the boss has a problem with that, he can go fuck himself, get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.
Export Selection