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May 24, 2022 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

01:42:20

S4E120 - HACK THE GOVERNMENT

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	So we're about to have our first burger after the fast.
	Look at my pants.
	Look how much weight I've lost.
	How you doing?
	Can I get a cheeseburger with mayo, ketchup, lettuce, pickles, tomatoes, jalapenos?
	And large fries.
	No, small fries.
	And a smaller chicken.
	Yep.
	No, no, he's going to order two.
	Okay, can we get a cheeseburger with beans, lettuce, tomato?
	Isn't that weird that Prince is playing right now and saying that?
	That's God.
	This thing called life.
	It's something else.
	I got it.
	Y'all make it a video?
	Yeah.
	We're finishing a seven-day fast.
	Yep.
	Yeah, we haven't eaten in seven days.
	Is it for the meal?
	Yeah.
	Thank you for giving me water.
	We've been thinking about it all week.
	Me too.
	We're going to rape these burgers.
	It's not so crazy for me because I've been raising it to like all kinds of stuff.
	Yeah.
	Uh I can't have both turned into bad so I can fucking know most important part of five guys?
	Oh we got a break unopened Yeah, tell her again.
	Oh yeah, we threw the camera.
	We had it eaten for seven days I thought it would last two days.
	I made it the full seven though are gonna go with a coke zero if they got it they do oh we did diet dr. Pepper is the best diet pepper best diet soda in the world diet dr. Pepper like a true fag so that's your first sip of something that's not that gross juice right yeah well let's see your first sip kind
	and he might not be the best but Owen Benjamin is officially my favorite penis I haven't had a peanut penis I haven't had a peanut in me I haven't had any penis in me in a long time this is the first of many penis that I'll have in my body in my mouth I love putting peanuts in my mouth they are delicious I'm obsessed with peanuts in my mouth you're pronouncing it in a way if I If I had like a date 46,
	we're doing it, we're doing it, we're doing it well, we're doing it, we're doing it, we're doing it well.
	Start to have a burger for the first time in seven days.
	Burger is the greatest thing.
	It's the greatest invention ever.
	I don't like how lackluster that was in Billier Meal thing because really it's like we just got off on a juicer.
	Yeah.
	Oh wow.
	Look how they just spread the fries out.
	Have you never been here before?
	Not in a long time.
	Okay, that doesn't mean anything.
	Did you forget how they do fries?
	You have several fry waves.
	Oh my god.
	Okay.
	Oh my god, I'm salivating like a lunatic.
	I don't know what you ordered.
	Probably some faggot burger.
	No, it was great.
	What did you order?
	Regular fag burger.
	How are our burgers different?
	I had mushrooms on mine.
	I cannot wait.
	Holy shit.
	Forget how fries go.
	Whoa.
	I don't even know if I can...
	I don't even want to do it.
	Yeah, I'm a little stressed out.
	Apparently the top of your mouth is going to kind of be sore.
	It wasn't sore from the penis?
	No.
	Because you're really ramming the peanuts in your mouth.
	For me, it's more of the back of the throat.
	Okay, here we go.
	Whoa.
	That was.
	That's insane.
	I can taste every single thing.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
	I'm still letting all the food.
	I'm gonna get better cheese here, man.
	Hmm.
	Oh, the crunch.
	Textures are such an important part of food.
	The crunch of the jalapenos.
	Holy fucking shit.
	The jalapenos are a little too intense, right?
	Yeah.
	I'm about to take some out.
	I'm having like a panic attack.
	I'm going for the full ride.
	Yeah, I think with hot stuff you build up a tolerance, and our tolerance is for not.
	It's for shit.
	That's a shitty theory.
	Ryan thinks that you lose your tolerance to hot to jalapenos for seven days.
	Yeah.
	Someone at home, please Google that.
	Okay, so that hamburger was just like, I revere it almost the same way I revere America and patriotism.
	And the two are not mutually exclusive.
	I mean, what's more American than a cheeseburger?
	And I just, and it's such a great example of how efficient our culture is.
	Like, we're a very on-the-go kind of civilization.
	And Europeans like to sit on their fucking asses for three hours and then have a big siesta, like in Barcelona and Spain and everything near the Mediterranean and France.
	And then fucking Mexicans with their legs aside as shit that's falling everywhere.
	This, you could be riding your motorcycle.
	Oh my god.
	That's great.
	Oh my god.
	Kind of scarred the linings of my mouth with that jalapeno.
	I regret that.
	But this is the fuel.
	This is white trash fuel.
	Yeah.
	Flies are gasoline for white people.
	Have you took a sip after eating?
	Like the sugary wash.
	Well it's sugar-free.
	But the wash of beverage after the food is crazy good.
	Wow.
	I'm not a ketchup guy, but I'm going to give it a whirl.
	Fold it so it has a bum and then just sit it down.
	Now it's like a woman menstruate.
	What I do is I get a cluster of like-sized fries and then I will apply.
	And you can try it at home too.
	Is your wife as annoyed by you as I am?
	Like when she sees that, does she go, oh, that's fun?
	Or does she do what I do, which is...
	I think she knows it rules.
	So for ketchup, you dip, but for mayonnaise, you apply.
	Well, if I had packets, I would apply.
	But why not just make a mayonnaise section?
	I don't like that.
	I don't like to wipe.
	You just wiped.
	That's it, wipe.
	This is in the container here.
	But if it's in a pool, you push it around, now it's spreading all over the place.
	No, no, no.
	I don't know if I'm going to be able to pin.
	I'm going to delete the rest of the cherry or something.
	You're a fear-old child.
	Your mother wasn't around.
	Your grandparents are old and enough.
	Not enough, but you can only do so much.
	Your dad obviously isn't around.
	So you raised yourself.
	True.
	And you learned this recently.
	You came up with these retarded...
	Well, see, you came up that recently because you have a habit of inventing your own culture and your own traditions.
	So now you'll still be coming up with dumb shit when you're like 70.
	You're like, oh, it's Thursday.
	Time to wear a hat.
	Yeah.
	I have systems.
	Like, I don't watch any football, but I love football.
	I watch the Super Bowl.
	And I'll keep rooting for the underdog until it's, and then I'll pick a team right when somebody's about to win or lose.
	And I root for the comeback and overtime and stuff like that.
	Hold on, so I love football, but I don't watch any football.
	I watch a Super Bowl and some playoffs.
	So, why don't you have a shirt that says, I love football and with a bunch of teams on it.
	And then someone's going to come to you and go, Oh, you like what?
	What you see the game last time?
	You go, Oh, I don't watch it.
	I just love the sport.
	I love that it's there.
	I know it's there.
	Right.
	But you don't play it, obviously.
	Right.
	And you don't watch any games throughout the year.
	And why is that?
	You can't be bothered.
	But if it's a big event, like some people don't watch a lot of movies, but they'll watch the Oscars.
	You never know what you're going to see.
	You might see Will Smith slap a guy.
	Yes, if you don't watch any movies, but you watch the Oscars, you know what that means?
	Look, you don't love movies.
	Similarly, you don't love football.
	You enjoy the Super Bowl the same way people enjoy a parade.
	Just about.
	So reboot that theory and erase the part where it says, I love football.
	I love the Super Bowl.
	There we go.
	I fixed it.
	It's better now.
	I'm hitting the wall soon.
	Yeah, me too.
	I don't think I'm going to feel good after this.
	Well, it's going to be like cheating on your wife with Beatrice Doll.
	70s Beatrice Doll.
	80s.
	You feel good, but you feel terrible.
	Yeah.
	And you just ruin your children's life.
	And your money is gone.
	I guess I was going to go no bun.
	It would be the equivalent of like Beatrice Doll, but no foreplay.
	But then once I got in here, I was like, we're just doing a full burger.
	Well, you thought you were just going to neck and not fuck.
	And you decided to fuck.
	And that's when you grab the peanuts.
	No.
	I grabbed them to win in Rome.
	You know you.
	So when you're ready to fuck, you grab the peanuts.
	No.
	That has nothing to do with fucking.
	It's just a peanut.
	You can have peanuts any time of the day you want.
	You just said you didn't think you were going to go whole hog and you decided you wanted to fuck and then you grabbed peanuts.
	Okay, but in that sense, yes.
	But in the sense that makes me make me innocent, then no.
	These jalapenos, I can't handle them anymore.
	You know what I mean?
	It's fire.
	Yeah.
	It's hurt.
	It's actually kind of ruining the experience.
	Me, I'm loco, so I'll just eat one raw.
	Boom.
	I have to re-drink.
	You know what's weird?
	I can feel my pants filling up.
	These are getting...
	Maybe I won't even need suspenders by the time we walk out of here.
	Oh man.
	Is there any more fries in that sack?
	Tons.
	No way.
	What the hell?
	Hey, every time I come here and they're playing 80s music, it's always jammed.
	Let's go crazy.
	Sammy Hagger, I can't drive 55.
	Yeah, who picked this?
	I don't...
	Every five guys has the best DJ in the world.
	And then you put on 80s music.
	What's it called?
	80s on 8 or something?
	Sirius?
	Sirius.
	And it's the gayest, most esoteric, like B-side on a flock of seagulls 7-H.
	So there weren't enough hits for you in 10 years?
	No.
	They probably think they're cute by picking all the B-sides.
	Be like, you won't hear this type of babies.
	Why?
	Because it stinks?
	People are not listening to AIDS music for deep cuts.
	They want to party in their car.
	I have a Van Halen Greatest Hitch CD in the car.
	And the first half is David Lee Roth, and then the second is Sammy Hagger.
	And you're listening to it, it's like Panama and Bucket Jump and Hot Proteacher.
	Yeah.
	And then you just feel dirty at some point in the drive.
	And you're like, what?
	What's wrong with me?
	Am I a pedophile?
	Why do I feel gross?
	Oh, we're in the Sammy Hager section.
	Bay Hagar.
	Well, you probably like Sammy Hager.
	Oh, my God.
	Why can't this be love?
	You love that jam.
	Then there's another one.
	They prefer Hager Bay onto the Table D Rock.
	It's comparable.
	I mean, because later on in the years, the recording quality got better.
	So it's like...
	The recording quality?
	Yeah.
	You're lucky.
	I'm paid to be here because this is...
	So you listen to Panama and you go, hmm, I wish they had a higher quality.
	Dude, the recording equipment back then in Panama was millions of dollars.
	Yeah.
	But it's better than the Hagar years.
	The Hagar years are a little clearer and they have a lot more synth.
	I'm serious.
	See what I have to put up with, folks?
	So, according to...
	If you're here right now, it's a really good gym.
	It gets you pumped.
	It's fucking shopping mall music.
	Yeah.
	Politicians use it.
	It's corny.
	This is time in a place for Hagar.
	No, there's no...
	I can't drive 55, we could argue, but not Hagar Halen.
	Man, Hagar?
	That's a type of person, dude.
	I want to be that type of person.
	It's like a Guy Fieria of music.
	A what?
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	I like that guy.
	I like the corny, like, rock and roll, like Pompadour.
	Actually, I don't.
	Pompadour?
	Yeah, you know the guys that ride hot rods with the flames inside of the car?
	And they wear their hair all gay and like the Stray Cats?
	Or the real original fans?
	Those guys.
	So you're talking about the 80s, 50s revival?
	Yeah, like happy days.
	And American graffiti.
	Stray cats.
	That's a fun era.
	It was wacky.
	And Japanese people love that, so it's probably in my blood.
	Have you ever seen those like rockabilly punks?
	I would never want to be one, but I think that's hilarious.
	So because Japanese people like rockabilly, it's a genetic thing, and that's why you like it.
	You know what this comes from?
	One trip on mushrooms, I was listening to my iPod, and I was like, hate listening to, I forget what album, but I was like, why do I hate this?
	Like, I literally downloaded it to listen to and hate.
	And then a switch flicked.
	Where I was like, they're just trying their best.
	They're just making music.
	They're like, it's so easy to hate them.
	And then I forgot.
	But it was.
	That's the only important part of this story.
	It was just an artist that, like, it could have been like, let's say, like, Nickelback or something.
	You know, like, when you have corny songs on your iPod, they'd be like, hey, guys.
	How do you know what corny is?
	You like Shania Twain?
	What's that?
	Twain's song is good.
	Jingle Bells?
	No, Jingle Bells is cornier than your normal taste.
	Well, people say Nickelback's corny.
	I bought into it.
	But you listen to it and you're like, this is a perfectly fine rock song.
	I like perfectly passable fine.
	Alright, so on Ryan's Music Hour, so far we learned how awesome Sammy Haggers Van Halen is and how kick-ass nickelback.
	That was a microphone for a second.
	Today on Ryan's rock hour.
	Dude, I'm inflating.
	Yeah, no, I don't feel good.
	I feel good.
	But I feel fat.
	It looks like you're expanding.
	I know, eh?
	Like, these suspenders are now too short.
	You're loosening them up now.
	Yeah.
	What the hell?
	I feel a little pudge sitting down now, too.
	It's gotta be psychosomatic.
	You probably like that song.
	I'm a little bit psycho.
	No, no, no, no, no, no.
	Oh, no, she's just a psycho.
	It's a little bit psycho.
	I don't know that song, but it sounds good.
	Is it like Pat Benatar or something?
	Alright, let's go.
	Now let's get out of here.
	Look at all these pies we're throwing away.
	Keep up a few more.
	Sick.
	You eat like my daughter.
	It just takes fuck an hour.
	I like to be in and out.
	You should have went to in-out burger.
	I like being in and out even when peanuts are involved.
	Oh, are you saying this peanut?
	Like peanuts?
	Alright, I'm done.
	Wait, you just vinegared fries and said you're done?
	Yeah, after this, this is the last for the Mohegans.
	That mayonnaise habit is infuriating.
	Okay, put your shit down.
	Get on with our lives here.
	Yeah.
	And we gotta go do the show.
	Oh shit, it really is.
	My name is Dewey Roberts.
	Oh, live from New York.
	It's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes.
	Barracks number three.
	I always done an honest job.
	As honest as I could.
	I got a brother named Frankie.
	And Frankie ain't no good.
	Now ever since we was young kids, it's been the same come down.
	I get a call on a short wait.
	Frankie's in.
	Can I get my notes?
	Whoa!
	It's amazing how fast you put the weight back on.
	Seven days we don't eat, and we go to five guys, and the next thing you know, the next thing you know, all the weight's back on.
	I remember I talked to Tommy Robinson after he got out from the second time in prison, and I was like, dude, you're emaciating.
	He goes, I could look at McDonald's and put on 10 pounds.
	Well, we looked at a five guys and we put on about 200 pounds.
	I feel fine.
	Really?
	You look obese.
	You lost nine pounds and I think you gained back like 100 pounds.
	Probably just the gains.
	The muscles are full of glycogen.
	Oh, it's so tiring.
	Even just that walk from the fucking ghetto blaster to here.
	I'm like the 600-pound life narration.
	From the moment I wake up, I'm in pain.
	I have to bring a chair to the shower because I'm worried I will fall.
	It's hard for me To wash.
	My only solace, no, they never use a big word like solace.
	My only joy is eating food.
	I find comfort in the food.
	And then they find some excuse for their own fatness.
	When I was eight, my parents got divorced.
	Losers.
	Oh my God.
	How did you survive?
	So we would stay at my grandma's and she'd let us eat whatever we want.
	Okay, so your grandma's a cunt and your parents are assholes.
	That's why you're fat.
	Anyway, we're fat now after a seven-day fast.
	Opening song, Highway Patrolman by Bruce Brinkstein.
	And God has been talking to me in my car via my CDs.
	I have an old JA now and I listen to old CDs.
	And he sends me messages.
	And I want to hire my brother.
	My brother's career in app development and web marketing was completely devastated because he's my brother.
	And now he works construction.
	I want to bring him down here.
	I want to employ him.
	And I'm trying to figure out how to do that, all the logistics with immigration and all that shit.
	Is this twisted?
	Dude, this is twisted.
	I asked you to make it not twisted.
	And then God chooses this song Highway Patrolman about a highway patrolman.
	They made a movie about it called Indian Runner.
	It's about a highway patrolman whose brother ain't no good, but he's his brother, and a man who turns his back on his family ain't no good.
	They made a movie about it called Indian Runner.
	Did I just say that twice in a row?
	Yes.
	Weird.
	I'm just so happy to be able to eat.
	And I'm like, I know atheists would say, moron, God didn't choose that song for you and play it for you.
	You notice it because your brother's been on your mind recently.
	You've been talking about him and that's why it stuck out.
	And I'm like, yeah.
	Same thing.
	Right.
	Like, atheism is God.
	All they do is they change the word God with nature.
	And they go, no, that's because why do you think things pop out at me because of nature?
	Because of God.
	It's all the same thing.
	So my subconscious is sending me a message saying, hey, man, your brother, that's important.
	Keep working on that.
	That's a big deal.
	That's why this song is resonating with you.
	You can call it nature.
	You can call it genetics.
	You can call it the pattern of evolution.
	Or you can call it God.
	It's all the same thing.
	So sometimes if I'm lazy and I don't feel like explaining shit to atheists, I'll just say nature.
	I'll go, that's nature's way of saying blah, blah, blah.
	But I really mean, that's God, because God is nature.
	Or when they say the universe.
	Yeah, the universe is speaking to me.
	Okay, yeah, the universe.
	That's gayer and weirder.
	The universe is...
	Gayer than God?
	Well, it's in their eyes, they would call it gay.
	I wouldn't call it gay.
	So in an atheist's mind, these songs jump out at me and say something for genetic natural reasons.
	In a believer's mind, it's God giving you a little wink.
	What's the difference?
	There is no difference.
	So atheists believe in God is what I'm saying.
	They deny parts of the Bible and they say this religion doesn't mean that.
	And there's, you know, Ricky Gervais is all about, oh, there's 400 different gods, and yours is the right one.
	Catholicism is our lame attempt to make sense of this unfathomable beauty that's up there.
	I believe it's the closest to the right version, but it's not perfect.
	And one of the worst ones, for example, would be the cargo cult, where they worship airplanes.
	It's still the same.
	They're still worshiping God.
	Now, some Catholics go, well, the cargo cult people are going to hell.
	Buddhists are going to hell.
	I don't believe that.
	I think we're all striving to figure out, or at least to acknowledge, this incredible gift that is life and the universe.
	And that's what church is.
	It's gratitude.
	You go there and you say, I'm not taking this for granted.
	Thank you.
	Obesity is kind of blasphemous in that sense because God gives you life and what do we do with it?
	We become gigantic fat pigs.
	Look at this.
	I can rest my mic on my gun.
	Yeah, I would listen to people talking stand-ups that are fat.
	They're like, I would put cheeseburgers on my chest and then eat them watching TV.
	I'm like, how do you do that?
	And now I understand.
	I remember when we lived upstate, we would go to the hospital at Port Jervis, which I don't recommend.
	My son got a fucking infection there that was from Iraq.
	It was this disease that he got because he had a diaper rash, and I changed him in the bathroom, and he got it there somehow.
	Dude, when she told me the name of the disease, I needed a pen to write it down.
	It was like a password.
	It was like sarvakovical asphonitis.
	078.
	HXB-OMLAT.
	I looked it up and it's like scorpions have it in Iraq.
	Anyway, we're there and there's no seats.
	All the seats are used up.
	And this woman, this fat, oh, there's extra special seats for fatsos.
	So there's like four normal seats and five insane seats, right?
	All the insane seats are full of insanely fat people.
	She shows up and she's, oh, shit, there's no seats.
	They're not getting up.
	I could get up.
	She can't fit in my chair.
	So you know what she does?
	No problem.
	She kneels, like taking a knee.
	But with her beanbag legs, it was like sitting down.
	And then she takes, she has a sega genesis and she plays it on a table called her tits.
	Her tits were parallel to the ground.
	She's table tits.
	And so her friend shows up.
	She's pregnant, I think, or she doesn't even know.
	And her friend shows up.
	He's like, hey, Pam, how's it going?
	Blah, blah.
	And she goes, what's going on?
	She goes, oh, this fucking doctor.
	He said that this medication would stop my sores from weeping, but it didn't at all.
	Ew.
	What a dick.
	He can't even stop her sores from weeping.
	Get it Together, doctor.
	God, what an idiot he is.
	What a useless, lazy piece of shit.
	What a self-indulgent fuckface that doctor is for not stopping your sores from a weeping.
	Can you stop your family members from weeping?
	Because you're killing yourself.
	Jesus.
	Anyway, that was cool.
	In the city, I'm reading my own notes like they're from a stranger.
	Oh, here's another thought I had, by the way.
	I was looking at my neighbors and driving around Westchester, and I was thinking how much I fucking despise these people.
	Like, I see them as vermin, insects.
	I fucking hate them.
	I hate the people of suburban New York.
	Despise them.
	I went to a board meeting today, like a town hall, and it was so gay.
	It was these little stations, and this is the environmental station.
	How would you like your community to improve environmentally?
	How would you like to improve this way, that way, blah, blah, blah.
	And I just said, like, the schools are getting woke.
	The only reason people moved here are for the schools.
	You're ruining the schools with this woke shit.
	Stop it, or everyone's leaving.
	I'm not just talking about me.
	I mean the whole concept of this suburb.
	And there was a board that said, where would you like to see your community in 10 years?
	I just wrote, MAGA, stuck her to the board.
	And the woman, by the way, when I stuck her to the board, she goes, she's in charge.
	Actually, I didn't stick her to the board.
	She does the actual sticking.
	You give her the tack and the thing, and she does the sticking, government work.
	And she goes, I'm with you.
	I'm probably the only one here.
	And I was looking at the other ones, and one of them was, what would you like to see in your community 10 years?
	Diversity.
	And then it says in brackets, lacking here.
	Bitch, the Bronx is right there.
	We're touching the Bronx.
	We're touching Yonkers.
	You want diversity?
	It's in your fucking face.
	Why did you move here?
	So they'll ruin it with woke politics and subsidized housing, and then they'll move to a new community.
	The irony, too, is like the blacks who live here, not here, but up where I am, they've hustled, busted their ass, and made it to a predominantly white community.
	They don't want the ghetto following them.
	And it is actually surprisingly diverse when you look at the numbers, Westchester, as opposed to other parts of America, like where Patricia Arquette lives, which is 0% black.
	Oh, I think we have some stuff on her in a bit.
	We'll get to that.
	Yeah, Crowder had a thing recently on the Browning of America.
	It's a good montage because the replacement theory has been discussed quite a bit, and you know my views on it.
	My views are the truth.
	And let's break it down for the 50th time.
	Yes, we are being diluted ethnically.
	Yes, the people involved are disproportionately Jewish, but they're not really Jews.
	They're ginos, Jews in name only.
	They don't read the Talmud.
	They don't go to synagogue.
	They don't go to the temple.
	The only reason they practice their religion at all is to socialize and to network.
	They're not Jewish.
	Orthodox Jews are Jewish.
	These people are phonies and they're just elite whites.
	Lawrence O'Donnell, Chris Hayes, fucking Warren Buffett, Bill Gates.
	Our enemies are elite whites of all stripes and religions.
	The only reason that Jews are overrepresented in that group is because Jews have higher IQs, because that's part of their cultural heritage, blah, blah, blah.
	As far as the propaganda you see on the Browning of America, that's white ethnomasochism, which is a strange trait we have where we love to shit on ourselves.
	And I don't get that.
	I'll figure that out one day.
	We're the only race that does it.
	And then the final thing, of course, is the Mexicans are imported en masse, not because of their race, but because they vote Democrat in exchange for the open borders.
	So in a sense, it's a bribe.
	The DNC has sold citizenship, like prostitutes, to random people.
	You can get a fake passport.
	You know, if you want to go on the lamb and you're a criminal, you can get a fake passport for like $100,000 from a million African countries.
	They sell passports to any Tom, Dick, and Harry.
	That's what the DNC is doing with illegal aliens.
	Anyway, here's a good montage of people.
	You're going to see non-white people, and you're going to see non-Jewish people, but this is, for all intents and purposes, white people excited about the eradication of their race.
	And I know white people who have said this to me.
	Like my buddy Trevor, he was bussed as a kid into a black neighborhood.
	So he speaks black.
	He's black, for all intents and purposes, overusing that term.
	And I was like, okay, so you're fine with like America becoming like 70% black and Mexican and whites being a minority?
	He goes, yeah, good.
	I can't wait.
	That's kind of a normal thing to say in America.
	And you'd never hear anyone say that in Mexico or Africa or Japan or anywhere.
	This is very relaxing being fat.
	Yeah.
	I feel very chill.
	Okay, so roll that clip, Chubby.
	Hey.
	But there absolutely is a plan taking place right now before your very eyes.
	They call it the Browning of America.
	In a few years, we're going to be a majority brown country.
	White people will not be the majority in the country anymore.
	This will be the first generation ever in American history in which whites will be a minority of the generation at some point.
	In 2044, everyone is going to be a minority.
	As white people become the minority in the country, which is coming.
	Demographics is destiny.
	Demographics is destiny.
	Demographics is destiny.
	I've been saying it here.
	Other people have been saying it here for years now.
	The demographics is destiny.
	So we live in a country where the demographics are changing.
	It's becoming less white.
	Correct.
	Okay.
	You'll be announcing that we're calling the 38 elections votes of Texas for the Democratic nominee for president.
	It's changing.
	It's going to become a purple state and then a blue state.
	It's a big demographics, because of the population growth.
	The growth in Texas is almost entirely driven by non-white population growth, mostly by Hispanic and Latino population growth.
	But they're absolutely a plan taking place right now before you're here.
	Why do they love it so much?
	And the funny thing about the left, too, is they've been pushing this on us and screaming with the Browning of America, which I'm not even sure I totally believe.
	We've talked about this earlier, where, you know, I married an Indian.
	My kids look mostly white, most of them.
	Some of them look pretty Indian.
	But they're going to marry white just by the numbers.
	And then those kids will definitely look white.
	So in a sense, my wife has like deretted her skin.
	She's killed the Ho-Chunk Indian lineage.
	So if I was a Ho-Chunk Indian, I'd be mad that she married me.
	But whites married that I married.
	I used to joke about that.
	I'd say, you assholes, keep marrying white.
	You racists keep marrying white.
	I'm a real racist.
	I'm cleaning up the race.
	I'm washing the other races.
	Like if you marry a black person and then have mulatto kids and then they marry white, they marry white, you'll clean the black off.
	So a real bona fide racist marries a minority because they're cleaning it up.
	Get it?
	Anywho, so they started that whole thing and they rubbed it in our faces because they assumed we were racist and they assumed it would offend us.
	But we just went, eh, all right, that's gay.
	See, when we see these commercials with black people and white and mixed race couples and stuff, we don't go, ah, like they think we do.
	We just go, that's gay and boring.
	So now they're like, oh, you hate being replaced, right?
	No, that's not a thing.
	We hate that you're diluting the voting pool and giving away free citizenship.
	We hate that your commercials suck, but we're not mad.
	It's like when they have Proud Boys, there's like a Proud Boys Twitter account where it's a rainbow saying that Proud Boys are fags.
	Proud Boys are fags.
	Plenty of them are fags.
	I went to a Proud Boys wedding where two guys were getting married.
	You know, the two gay guys at WestFest, they were awesome.
	Those two homos at WestFest, yeah.
	And then when people use this show, this very show, to try to like, you know, they go to a protest and they say, get off my lawn.
	What is that?
	It's from a protest.
	Somebody saw it and sent it in.
	I don't get it.
	I think it's like, get off my lawn, my hairy pussy, like for abortion.
	Oh, like, mow your lawn?
	Yeah.
	Well, then they should have green pubes sticking out.
	I know.
	They have no.
	That's a very esoteric sign.
	Oh, there's a Proud Boy.
	So the Proud Boy's thing we discussed yesterday in Long Island, right?
	Remember that?
	Yeah.
	So they were handing out pamphlets that said, we're anti-racist.
	Right?
	So there's an article here.
	What number is it?
	Right here?
	12B.
	Where they go, yes, they're anti-racist.
	This professor says, yeah, they're anti-racist.
	But what it really means is they're anti-you being racist towards whites.
	Wow, that's, wow.
	That's a new one.
	That is a new one.
	Alan Singer, a professor of education and history at Hoffsford University, who has researched and written extensively about racial history on Long Island, racial history on Long Island, what?
	Said the Prowboys' anti-racist claims are not what they appear to be.
	Their concept of anti-racist is very different from what most people mean.
	They are arguing that the United States is racist against whites.
	So I thought, let's give him a call.
	Ooh.
	I got his numbers here.
	So we'll try.
	We'll try three of them, right?
	Then they'll start to get boring.
	Alan Singer.
	This is a fucking loser.
	You know, I'm here to learn, share, listen, understand why.
	Hey, why does everyone get two things?
	You have one thing.
	Thank you for calling.
	It's great hearing from you.
	Bye-bye.
	All right, next call.
	718-768-7239.
	The number you dialed is not in certain 463.
	Sorry.
	Is not available.
	Record your message at the cone.
	When you are finished, hang up or press pound for more options.
	Hey, Alan, it's Gavin McInnes here, the founder of the Proud Boys.
	What the fuck are you talking about?
	When they say anti-racist, they mean racist against whites.
	Why are you trying to crowbar racism into this club when black and brown patriots are handing out pamphlets that say anti-racist?
	I mean, talk about a square peg into a round hole.
	Anti-racist means anti-racist.
	They are against racism in general.
	That includes racism towards whites and, believe it or not, racism towards blacks.
	And then you pull up the KKK from like 100 years ago?
	What the fuck are you, like, are you teaching our kids this shit?
	Anyway, call me back.
	We got to iron this out because you are way off base.
	Let's try one more.
	Thanks for calling.
	In that article, he goes on to talk about how the KKK had a strong presence on Long Island in 1920.
	Ergo, the Proud Boys are like back.
	That sounds like a fax machine.
	Also in the news, fun little piece of gossip there.
	Jack Bosobic goes to check out the World Economic Forum, and because that's him, let's see him again.
	And he is Jewish, very Jewish.
	I looked up his entire history of his life.
	He's only lived in these tiny apartments.
	He's probably a gay.
	But you study the KKK on Long Island.
	You don't often get a call from a journalist.
	So when they get it, they could be like, what's with the sandwich shops on Long Island, KKK expert?
	Well, the KKK had a lot of sandwiches back in 1920.
	You would be surprised.
	And when they say they're not racist, they mean that their sandwiches are racist, but they're not.
	Yeah, so Pasobic goes to check out the World Economic Forum.
	They don't have free speech over in Europe, so they just detain him.
	Excuse me, can I ask you why you're detaining this journalist?
	Holly.
	Can I ask you why you're detaining this journalist?
	I don't answer your question.
	Is it not able to report here?
	Please put it in a way.
	Okay.
	Can I ask you guys why you're asking me?
	Yeah, can you please stop filming?
	Then we can talk.
	Oh, why do I need to stop filming?
	Because I asked you to...
	And he specifically was targeted?
	There is a reason because we have to have a reason to control a person.
	What's even more interesting is they started asking, tell me what Turning Point USA is.
	Turning Point USA has sent you out there.
	Who is that?
	What are they about?
	What kind of footage do you have?
	Then they said, can you show us the footage?
	Can you show us the various footage that you have?
	Come on back into our van.
	And they tried to take one member of the crew back into their van to show the footage.
	I said, no, no, no.
	They do not have the First Amendment here.
	They do not have freedom of the press the same way we do in the spooky.
	Like the way they just say it.
	What are you doing?
	Give me that.
	What's your footage?
	Can I see your footage?
	Like, I guess they're used to getting yeses.
	Now, this is a white community, right?
	A white country.
	So I guess white people are so, you know, used to acquiescing into the rules.
	Or is it maybe it's not racial?
	Maybe it's cultural more.
	Because in America, you film and someone says, stop filming, and you go, no.
	You realize how, I mean, I bitch a lot about how Stalinist America has become, and I am on censored.tv.
	But at least when you see a cop arresting someone, you can take a video and they're not going to stop you.
	The best they can do is stand back, stand back.
	I wonder if they have body cams out there.
	Yeah.
	Well, check this out.
	The World Economic Forum has their own police force.
	What the fuck?
	Magin!
	What is this?
	What now?
	What the fuck?
	Look at them again.
	Look at that.
	What?
	I gotta admit, outside of this show, I kind of want that patch.
	That's a sick batch.
	That's a sick fucking patch.
	World Economic Forum Police.
	It's what, two rams, budding heads?
	It looks evil.
	It's fucking cool evil.
	That's Darth Vader.
	Is that like a gem?
	I want that whole outfit.
	I like the hat, everything.
	Yeah, that's...
	Hey, if there's any World Economic Forum Police watching the show, can you send one of your uniforms to us?
	It rules.
	What a cool Halloween costume that would be.
	What's the next thing?
	Yeah, thanks, Benny.
	We got you the first time.
	So they're not only wearing the patches, but if you look closely, you can see that they have very cool outfits.
	Benny Johnson, out.
	Globalists.
	Speaking of globalists, Julian Assange is for free speech.
	He helped us see all of Hillary's emails.
	That's good.
	We want maximum transparency with the government.
	I want to know everything about our elected officials and our non-elected officials.
	I want to know where they live.
	I'm not going to their house like the Supreme Court judges, but I want to know how much money they make.
	I want to know what they do.
	They took my money.
	If someone takes my money, I want to know what they're doing.
	If you make your own money, it's none of my fucking business.
	You work for me.
	You're my employee.
	I need to know what my employees are doing.
	So getting Hillary's emails, fantastic, especially someone like Hillary, where I honestly believe she's responsible for the murder of at least 14 people, right?
	So Julian Assange is a good guy.
	But as we talked about yesterday with George Carlin, big comedy is big government.
	And they are a mouthbox.
	They're a PR firm for the government.
	So check out all these people running laps for Hillary, carrying her water.
	Leaks and Draco Malfoy's biological father has finally been arrested.
	White people.
	You can tell that living inside the embassy for seven years has taken its toll.
	Here he is back in 2012.
	Yeah.
	Now compare that to today.
	I mean, it's amazing.
	The guy went in looking like Draco Malfoy, came out looking like Dumbledore.
	He was stuck in captivity.
	He served seven years.
	He wasn't considered a person and had to be on the lamb hiding in an embassy because he promoted free speech.
	Look how weak he is.
	He's basically dying.
	The government almost killed this man and we're laughing at him like he's warm beer.
	Remember that kid in North Korea who came back dead?
	Yeah.
	Like, why don't you laugh at Otto Warm Beer while you're at it?
	Why don't you laugh at other political prisoners?
	Let's laugh at Max and John.
	Let's laugh at Ethan Nordine.
	Ethan Nordine just did a seven-day hunger strike.
	The guy's starving in solitary.
	And did you see one of the Prow Boys, or not one of the Prow Boys, one of the January 6 prisoners killed himself?
	He was so hopeless with the threat of 30 years in prison that he ended his own life.
	What a loser, right?
	Yeah, he was like a Harry Potter character, too.
	Yeah, when he died, he looked like the dead guy in a Harry Potter movie.
	Didn't Harry Potter die?
	I think so.
	Yeah, the guy who killed himself is like a dead Harry Potter.
	Voldemort.
	Oh, he's so dead.
	It's like someone waved a magic wand and made him a dead guy.
	It's like they did a suicide spell on him, right?
	Like Harry Potter.
	That's the only cultural reference I know because I'm a fucking loser-fat nerd who writes for late-night comedy.
	Looks like somebody did a spell political prisoner Alice.
	They always have Harry Potter as a cultural reference.
	That's fucking weird.
	Seeing it back to back?
	What the fuck?
	Do you have a fucking life?
	Does it keep this movie?
	Does it keep going?
	Does he remind you of anyone from Toy Story?
	Who are you, Ryan Katsu Rivera?
	That's how much of a loser you are.
	No, no, no.
	You're like Ryan.
	Like, I like how you're saying, no, no, no, no, no.
	And behind you is Buzz.
	Tupac.
	Nah, that's my shirt.
	No, it's not.
	Oh.
	Is that your sleep shirt you were talking about?
	Yeah, this is one of my comfies.
	Ryan wears a sleep shirt like a chick.
	No, it's just got a lot of room so you can breathe.
	And do you let your pussy breathe or do you wear panties when you go to bed?
	I usually.
	Oh, you McInnis.
	Dragged out of the Ecuadorian embassy looking like Santa Claus with a manifesto.
	You're all naughty.
	I have it on my list.
	He's being brucked.
	Oh, they couldn't do a Marvel reference.
	They had to settle with Harry Potter.
	They must be so.
	Harry Potter, Santa.
	What's next?
	A diaper reference?
	To the U.S. read a book after the age of 10?
	Looks like Alexander Soliz Netsian after he escaped Stalinist Russia.
	Yeah, babe.
	Really?
	Got the key here?
	Tomorrow, yeah.
	Wow.
	Assange is being charged by the U.S. for trying to hack into a Defense Department computer back in 2010.
	And in 2010, it was really difficult to hack the government system because the password was password one.
	I don't get that joke.
	Do you get that joke?
	Yeah, that's like an easy, if you're like signing up for something you're never going to use again.
	Yes, I understand that.
	But what's the joke that it was, why is it funny that it was easy to hack?
	So it takes away credit from him.
	You know, it's like, oh, okay.
	He didn't even do that.
	But that makes him sound more innocent.
	You know what that whole story was?
	So Chelsea Manning was having trouble getting all the data from the computers.
	And Assange said, you could try this process called, I forget what it's called.
	It's like a hashtag burn or some bullshit computer thing.
	So he suggested that, and that's him hacking.
	Good, hack.
	Hack the government.
	That's a good name for this.
	They love the government now.
	That's a good name for this episode.
	Hack the government.
	They complain about the government.
	They hate the government until it's convenient to their side to attack people attacking the government.
	Quote unquote.
	That's all bullshit.
	That he shat on everything.
	That's all lies.
	Being food, cleanliness, and proper care of his cat.
	Assange bristled at the restrictions that took Ecuador's foreign ministry to court.
	There have been reports for some time that Assange was sort of had outlived his welcome there in the embassy for all sorts of reasons, including that he was skateboarding in the halls, stealing Wi-Fi so that his cat had been making a mess.
	Stealing the Wi-Fi?
	You mean he used the Wi-Fi?
	Did they not have their Wi-Fi anymore?
	He took it away from them?
	Steal Wi-Fi.
	Skateboarding a mi-using, which we all do everywhere we go.
	Stealing Wi-Fi so that his cat had been making a mess.
	So, you know, the Ecuadorians were getting sick of having him there.
	Why the hell was Julian Assange skateboarding in the hallways of an embassy and stealing their Wi-Fi?
	He took them to court over his cat.
	Usually people go to court to get restraining orders against their cats.
	Please, Your Honor, he keeps glaring at me like he wants to kill me.
	Stop.
	Are we five years old?
	What the fuck?
	I don't know if a five-year-old would like that.
	I think you'd have to find a two-year-old.
	Don't we all usually get restraining orders against our cat?
	Yeah.
	What?
	I don't...
	A joke is you take something that's true and then you put a spin on it or you exaggerate it a little bit and then it becomes silly and funny because you took the real thing and you made it this big.
	Restraining order.
	I don't, no one, what?
	Maybe dogs are a threat to some dogs are a threat to some people.
	What?
	The dog, the cat looks like it's frowning, so you got to restrain it.
	I don't get it.
	What are you doing?
	That's not the way jokes work.
	What have you done?
	The most disturbing thing about the story is somehow not the fact that Assange allowed it to all over the embassy.
	No, it's that every day he dressed that poor thing up in a tie and collar.
	And I'm talking an entire wardrobe, right?
	Yeah.
	He's not yawning in the street.
	How dare he amuse himself with a silly hobby when he's robbed of his freedom, robbed of his personhood, and he plays a dumb game to amuse himself?
	Do you also make fun of the drawings on cell walls?
	Yeah, or autistic people finding refuge in bronies or whatever the fuck?
	Yeah.
	Like, we're mocking a prisoner for his silly hobby that has a sense of humor.
	He's screaming at me.
	What you're doing basically is saying that Assange's joke, it's obviously a joke.
	He's not sending his cat for job interviews.
	So it's a fun joke that he's doing.
	You're saying his joke is shitty in a shitty joke.
	Your joke's shitty, Trevor.
	The only good joke about you is you.
	You're a joke.
	Yeah.
	He's not yawning in this photo.
	He's screaming, help me!
	Help!
	One person who's always been very clear about where he stands on WikiLeaks is Donald Trump.
	And yet, when Trump was asked today about WikiLeaks, which he repeatedly praised throughout the campaign, he pretended he didn't know anything about it.
	Mr. President, do you still love WikiLeaks?
	I know nothing about Wikileaks.
	It's not my thing.
	Oh, it's not your thing.
	Your government just arrested a guy.
	Now you have to juxtapose this with him saying, I love WikiLeaks.
	That would work.
	That's a good example of Trump's hypocrisy.
	Nope.
	Organization you repeatedly praised throughout the campaign, and you're acting like someone just offered you weed at a party.
	Oh, No, thanks, man.
	That's not my thing.
	Oh, my God.
	Brutal.
	That took energy away from me.
	I know.
	It's tiring, isn't it?
	Speaking of comedy, I saw Ricky Gervais' new special is getting bad reviews.
	And guess what that means?
	It's good.
	It must be good.
	I remember Larry David's, I don't think it was the last season, I think it was the season before, the Fatwa one.
	Yes.
	It was getting all these terrible reviews.
	And I thought, oh, that's weird.
	It's one of the most brilliant shows ever.
	It's been on the air for 20 years, 10 years longer than Seinfeld.
	I fucking love Larry David.
	I am Larry David.
	And then I realized, oh, they don't like it because it's Islamophobic.
	Remember?
	Go to 1.7 first.
	He shits on the Ayatollah.
	Just for the record, the Ayatollahs of Iran regularly murder political prisoners.
	If you oppose the fucking Islamic dynasty of Iran, you die.
	Journalists, anyone who wants to run for office that might not go anywhere where the Ayatollah goes, maybe some faggy fucked because he's a homo himself, dead, dead, dead.
	Their criminal past makes Hillary look like an underachiever.
	So you're allowed to offend the Ayatollah, but no one knows that.
	They just hear Ayatollah, it sounds ethnic, and they go, you're making fun of an ethnicity.
	Wow.
	So that season was like persona non, seasona non grata.
	But it was fucking amazing.
	Go to 17.
	The co-creator of Seinfeld went on Jimmy Carlos.
	By the way, there's Lawrence O'Donnell.
	Everything you hate about Jews, your anti-Semitic conspiracy theories, he's part of.
	It's an elite white thing.
	Not a Jewish.
	What the fuck?
	What the fuck is right?
	No one would dare insult the sacred beliefs of Muslims nor disparage our owners.
	I didn't disparage.
	That was not disparage.
	You did disparage.
	No, no, I just disparaged.
	I begged you not to imitate the Ayatollah.
	No, you did.
	I told Leon.
	I said, you gotta get this message to him.
	Duff told you not Zambi to do the Ayatollah.
	I didn't fucking remember.
	How the fuck I'm gonna remember my Ayatollah?
	So then he gets...
	Just go to 1-8 to remind us of what Ayatollah's do.
	Then he goes to meet Salman Rushdie, who had a fatwan for the Satanic Verses, I think it was, a book he did that disparaged Muhammad a little bit.
	And Salman Rushdie goes, it sucks.
	I know.
	It's scary.
	It sucks.
	But the pussy is amazing because you're a bad guy and you have fatwa sex.
	It's the best sex you can have because women think you're dangerous.
	Like Maddie Odell, by the way, tiny little fat man, right?
	With a squeaky voice.
	Women cream their jeans over him because he's a murderer.
	Because he did 10 years and he's a bad man who's done some very bad things to people who deserved it.
	Women are all over that fucking guy.
	Yeah.
	He has murderer sex.
	Larry David was having fatwa sex.
	Even my wife was.
	And they got Salman Rushdie was on the show.
	Yeah.
	That was cool.
	What were you going to say?
	Even my wife is like, I love Maddie.
	I'm like, how much?
	Why?
	He farted once, smelled bad.
	Well, I said to this barmaid he's been hooking up with, I go, you realize that if you start horsing around with Maddie, none of us are going to flirt with you anymore.
	Right.
	We're all ugly old men.
	And I'm like, there's this guy we call Cheney because he looks like Dick Cheney.
	I go, no double entendres from Cheney.
	No ass grabbing from $3 Bill.
	No fucking Joe Tonelli winking at you.
	That's all going to be gone.
	And we learn from sopranos that if you're like, hey, you mind if I, you know, you're done with that chick, right?
	And they're like, yeah.
	And it doesn't mean they're done.
	Choose wisely, my dear.
	You're fucking up.
	Anyway, so when you see, there we go.
	When you see bad reviews these days, like when fucking Rotten Tomatoes gives it a 1%, you know we have a winner.
	So go back up now to 1.6.
	So Pink News says that Ricky Gervais' special is shitty, horrible, racist, Islamophobic, homophobic, and most importantly, transphobic.
	Cool.
	It's an anti-trans garbage fire.
	Reject.
	We reject you, Pink News.
	So let's check it out for a second.
	All right, all right.
	Fucking Netflix, clicky, click, click, click, click, click.
	By the way, just before you play it, a little segue.
	I can't believe we haven't covered this, but I had, besides five guys, I had cheese.
	I finished my son's breakfast, which was egg.
	I went to the fridge and I got what I've been missing all week, which is cheddar.
	Motherfucking cheese.
	Yummy.
	I picked up the egg, fried egg.
	I put the cheese down, plopped it back down.
	That was my first bite in seven days.
	The density of the cheese, the saltiness of the egg.
	And then I'm driving around.
	I'm happy.
	Right.
	Like, did I tell it on the show that someone gave me the finger from their car?
	Yep.
	And I felt this PTSD doom.
	Like, oh, great.
	I'm still on everyone's fucking radar.
	Everyone's still out to get me.
	It's going to affect my kids, blah, blah, blah.
	And then I saw it was my friend doing it.
	And I was like, oh, few.
	But now, if someone gave me the finger, I'd like jump out of my driver's seat into their car.
	Yeah.
	That's why I went to that town hall meeting and wrote MAGA on the wall.
	Like, I'm ready.
	Someone honked, and I was like, what the fuck?
	You honking at me?
	I mean, what are you?
	I almost turned the car around and followed them to find out, like, I got my fight back.
	Yeah.
	I'm ready to zing.
	Fucked my wife this morning.
	Nice.
	Oh, my God.
	It was, it was, she was fucked by a porn star.
	She had to do breathing exercises towards the end.
	She was going to faint.
	And my dick felt like it had menthol on it.
	I don't know what that means.
	But, and I lasted like as long as I wanted.
	I thought, I should probably wrap this up now.
	I got to go.
	I got to get to five guys.
	Yeah, that shit was good.
	That's not usual.
	No.
	So that was awesome.
	And yeah, it's like my subconscious, you can call it nature, you can call it God, is like, I want you to procreate.
	You're going to live.
	I thought you were dying earlier.
	Apparently you're not.
	Get out there, have some fun.
	And if anyone fucks with you, slap them in the face.
	Earlier, when my body thought I was dying, it's like, if someone slaps you, they're right.
	It was naked and afraid.
	I know what it's like to have depression now.
	I'm a happy guy.
	I'm an angry guy.
	I have a lot of rage, but generally I'm a happy dude.
	And I know what it's like to not be a happy dude.
	Yeah, yeah, good point.
	When someone tells me they're experiencing depression, they're on medication, I'm going to be more sympathetic now.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Yeah, I could never relate to, for a long time, I was like, I don't believe in anxiety or depression, and that's really insensitive to people that have that.
	But yeah, when you have, you can't even explain it.
	You're like, everything's fine.
	You got my dog.
	It's just a chemical difference.
	Yeah.
	Like sparring, I know I said I was weak and scared, but also with sparring, I was like, go ahead, let's punch Gavin.
	I'm with you.
	In church, though, it felt appropriate, because usually church is just like a little thing that we do, and then, you know, you're reverent and then you leave and you're like, all right, what are we going to eat?
	But when you're in church, you're like, this is the only place where it makes sense.
	You know, I'm fucking starving myself, and so please help.
	And la, la la.
	It feels right to be at church while you're like starving yourself.
	You know, it's probably why every religion has it because it teaches.
	I mean, that's what sweat lodges are.
	The whole point of a sweat lodge, which I did with my wife once, is the end.
	When you get out, you're walking on the snow, your footprints are melting the snow, and you're just like, oh, I'm so glad to be out of that fucking thing.
	It teaches you to, you know, not take things for granted.
	Wait, let's check.
	When you told me what you ate about the egg thing, like, it brought a tear to my eye.
	Oh, that's another thing.
	It was sexual.
	Or maybe it was, let me rephrase it.
	All the dope.
	It was exactly as good as sex.
	Wow.
	Like, you know, when you're fucking, you're like, this rules.
	I'm so lucky to be married to this bitch.
	I fucking love this fuckingest whore.
	This feels really good.
	Not just my dink, but everything feels fantastic.
	That's how it felt.
	Usually when I eat, I'm just like, this is yummy.
	But it was like, my whole world felt good.
	Yeah.
	So I had bone broth last night, knowing we were going to eat those burgers to get my stomach primed, and I was just hunched over it, just sipping it, and just every sip was like, oh, my God.
	The salt.
	Cheese and eggs I miss the most.
	I don't know why.
	I'm not a big cheese eggs guy, but I guess I am.
	Something about the combination of, and the density of cheese.
	I'm getting hungry right now.
	Yeah, me too.
	Okay, let's watch a bit of Ricky Gervais' thing, and then I want to figure out a magic trick.
	You want to do a trailer or just drop the needle?
	No, no, start at the beginning, because they say the first two minutes are a horrible trash can.
	Awesome.
	So let's go past the, ladies and gentlemen, Ricky Gervais.
	Gotcha.
	Wearing a black LA V-neck.
	Looks like he just comes right out.
	No bullshit.
	I'm here.
	I'm tearing my job.
	I'm so big on atheism.
	It's so gay.
	Supernature.
	Yeah, that's God.
	A man.
	He doesn't need to do this.
	A man.
	Are you kidding?
	I used to have a really good Ricky.
	You should do a slubby mailbag of him.
	I bet if you just watch like an hour of his podcast, you'll be back.
	I used to be a little better at it.
	Let's hear your Ricky.
	Hi, I'm Ricky Gervais.
	I'm a little nasal, but I've got to get my British accent down.
	There's no God.
	Racist.
	You know, you're racist.
	Isn't it?
	Isn't it racist?
	It's crazy.
	When he gets up to his bath.
	That's really bad.
	It used to be better, I'm telling you.
	Well, it sucks now.
	I admit that, and you're correct.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	Hello.
	Hello.
	Hello.
	Thank you.
	Shush, thank you, baby.
	Shush.
	No.
	Shush.
	Thank you, but shut the fuck up.
	No fucking whooping or just laugh.
	Thank no.
	Everyone calm down.
	Shush.
	Shush.
	I'm filming this.
	Shut up, you cunts.
	Thank you very much.
	Welcome to my show.
	It's not a show.
	There's no dancers or jugglers.
	It's basically a bloke talking.
	Which is essentially what stand-up comedy is, isn't it?
	A bloke talking.
	Sexist.
	What about all the funny female comedians?
	Like...
	No!
	That's an old joke.
	That's Norm.
	Norm did that.
	That's Norm McDonald.
	And he's got a stand-up special coming on Monday, by the way.
	Oh, really?
	It's just him in a coffin?
	No, it's a posthumous special.
	He filmed before he died.
	Posthumous?
	Posthumous?
	It's pronounced posthumous.
	No, it's not.
	Yes, it is.
	Posthumous.
	It's named after the chickpea dish.
	Posthumous.
	Posthumous.
	Go on, play.
	No, no, no, no.
	I'm not doing that.
	Okay, right.
	That was irony, okay?
	There's going to be a bit of that throughout the show.
	See if you can spot it, okay?
	Now, that's when I say something I don't really mean for comic effects.
	Why is the CCM summit?
	I don't know, but it says summit.
	I know.
	It's phonetic subtitling.
	And you, as an audience, you laugh at the wrong thing because you know what the right thing is.
	It's a way of satirizing attitudes.
	Like that first joke, I used the old-fashioned sexist trope that women aren't funny.
	Now, in real life, I know there are loads of funny women.
	Like, um.
	I did it again.
	Well spotted.
	Good.
	It's jokes about how clever he is.
	Dame Edna Everidge.
	She's.
	You're a Trans joke.
	Yeah, come on, man.
	Come on, man.
	She's not only a great comedian, she's also a great actress, isn't she?
	She was brilliant in that thing as that man.
	Oh, trans segue?
	It's good to be back.
	No, the comedian he's talking about, I think, is a man in drawing.
	I'm fucking in love with stand-up on my last tour, Humanity.
	I played arenas around the world.
	Let's get serious here.
	We attacked women so we can.
	We have important news to discuss.
	We're going to do a green screen on a magic trick that I've watched 7,000 times and cannot fucking figure out one iota.
	So maybe you guys can help.
	Let's do it.
	Ready?
	Oh, boy.
	I'm a big boy.
	Can you make it bigger?
	This is a guy.
	He looks like my old boxing coach.
	So I sent it around because I was laughing at my old boxing coach, pre-Larry Barnes, has a big bottom lip.
	But then I was watching the video I sent as a joke, and I was like, wait a minute, what the fuck?
	So let's just play it through once, and then let's go frame by frame and figure this out together.
	Two balls.
	One's in his mouth.
	Okay, so he obviously doesn't put the second ball in his hand, but let's try to catch him doing it.
	Can you go frame by frame?
	Oh my god, I'm so retarded.
	He clearly just palms it at the beginning.
	Yeah.
	That was...
	Yeah.
	Were you really good?
	Are you serious?
	Yeah, I thought.
	That's your fat.
	And then he puts it in his...
	All right, and that's the green screen.
	Wow.
	With Maria, as a band played out of the Johnstown flood, I catch him when he's streamed back in your brother.
	That was a bust.
	You're not you when you're hungry.
	Now that you've eaten me.
	I did come up with that idea when I was fasting.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	My shitty old hungry brain was like, what the fuck?
	How come the ball is in the hand and he's not in the hand?
	He's a magic guy.
	It's a mine.
	It's a mine thing.
	Jesus.
	Then you see it with a brain.
	Oh, that's one thing I forgot to mention, by the way.
	Speaking of the Ayatollah and Larry David daring to insult him, among the human rights violations, besides killing political opponents and dissidents and anyone who dared, well, Larry David.
	That's not a joke.
	Fatwas are a thing.
	They tried to kill Salman Rushdie.
	Besides that, they'd also torture women.
	And one of the tortures they did was they would pry open a woman's vagina and have like a millipede crawl in.
	Jeez.
	They put bugs in your kind.
	It's like Japanese level torture.
	Yeah, exactly.
	It's like a weird Japanese comic, horror movie.
	So dude, can you put on the AC?
	Being fat is murder.
	I don't care about the noise the AC makes.
	So this was 79, and I've told you this a hundred times, but it's important for the record.
	Margaret Atwood, my Canadian friend, overhears this.
	Overhears.
	Hears about all this when we all did.
	The whole world was learning like, what?
	We knew they were jerks, but millipedes in your cunt?
	That's pretty bad.
	Can you get back to a better backdrop, please?
	Have you been having this backdrop the whole time?
	No.
	That's just from the green screen.
	Oh.
	Because we were kind of over hodgepodge, but not in a segment.
	Right.
	And she goes, can you imagine if we ever became so psychotic that we were as bad as Muslims?
	Can you believe it if we...
	Could you imagine if we were as shitty as Islam?
	So she wrote The Handmaid's Tale.
	And the modern take on that is Trump is basically...
	What you're saying, they don't realize this?
	What they're saying is Trump is basically as bad as the Ayatollah.
	I'm okay with that, as long as you're acknowledging that the Ayatollah is evil and that Islam is corrupt.
	So while these feminists walk around like they're in the Handmaid's Tale protesting abortion, they don't realize they're protesting Iran.
	That stupid bitch, Chrissy, that tried to get me kicked out of our local bar, I saw her with the Handmaid's Tale and I was like, that book's about Iran.
	Always say that when you see people.
	When you see them dressed up at rallies like the Handmaid's Tale, go, that book's about Islam.
	They don't realize it.
	And it amuses me because...
	And I love too how Margaret Atwood is like, yeah, it's about Trump.
	Whatever pays my bills.
	I'm not fucking getting canceled for being Islamophobic.
	Yeah, the book's about Trump.
	By all means, fill your boots.
	Okay, so we've covered that.
	Speaking of women and feminism, I guess, let's start a feminist segment.
	Hey.
	Forgive me, I'm fat and slow.
	Who here identifies as a feminist?
	We are the storm, the very form of change that the world has been waiting for.
	You said I was too pretty to fight.
	That's toxic masculinity if you don't realize how your behavior is hurtful.
	So I discovered a new chick.
	I'd really like to get her on censored.tv if we can afford her.
	But check out this clip, 19.
	She's awesome.
	Turn it up.
	She's so beautiful, too.
	And stop, stop.
	When you look at feminists, right, look in their eyes and you just see this dead air.
	They look so sad and unfulfilled.
	You look at this traditional housewife and look into her eyes and you just see health, happiness, fulfillment, joy.
	That's God, nature's way of saying you're doing the right thing.
	That's why you're miserable when you're a 45-year-old blogger for the Huffington Post with a beta boyfriend who will never put a ring on it.
	You're miserable because nature wants you to be miserable because you're not doing the right thing.
	We're here to procreate.
	Sorry, folks.
	You're looking for the meaning of life?
	It's procreation.
	It's not blogging.
	It's not this.
	Hey, Allie, show me your ring.
	Oh, here.
	Now, tell me what you do for a living.
	Oh, I love my husband.
	And how did you get that awesome job?
	Well, I became a better human being.
	Turn it up.
	And I became feminine and also shocking, submissive.
	So that was the secret.
	So what are your tips to women that want to be a housewife?
	Dude, embrace it.
	It's an actual job.
	You just can't get it in the public or private sector.
	Like, you need a man to hire you for it.
	But that's okay.
	Because if you think about it, you submit to your boss who makes you clean stupid shelves at your retail job, right?
	I think she got that from me.
	Yeah.
	Because that's what I've been saying.
	Remember, Milo and I had lunch once and he was like, name a job that a woman does better than a man.
	And we spent the whole lunch going through it.
	And eventually we came up with real estate agent.
	But what does she do?
	She shows a house.
	That's what you do when you go to a woman's house.
	She takes her on a little tour.
	Shows you all the rooms.
	So every time women thrive in the workforce, they're doing housewife stuff.
	And they do social media a lot.
	A lot of their jobs are planning.
	So, sir, you have a meeting at four.
	That's what my wife does all day.
	We're going to my mother-in-law's birthday party.
	She gets the flights.
	This kid has a baseball game.
	This girl has music lessons.
	You pick them up, drop them off.
	HR?
	It's just like, you know, looking over people's behaviors and a thing.
	Yeah, yeah.
	What a woman do?
	They're worried about their daughter's friends.
	Right.
	I got to say, my daughter was totally ostracized when the Proboy ship blew up because Karens forbid their daughters from hanging out with her.
	And she ended up in the bad kids crowd.
	And I got to say, I kind of like the bad kids better.
	More fun.
	Edgy.
	They talk to me more.
	They're respectful.
	Hey, Mr. McInnis, beautiful house.
	I have to kick them out at midnight.
	They stay a little late.
	But the in-crowd, back when she was popular, they would just be on their phones.
	They were lying on their backs, all looking at their phones.
	And I'd come downstairs.
	There'd be like seven girls just staring at their phones alone.
	I'm like, ladies, stop looking at your phones.
	And then they'd be like, man, Mr. McInnes is a dick.
	He has all these crazy rules.
	Conformists, afraid to be themselves, afraid to color outside the lines.
	Yeah, a lot of bad kids are cool.
	Yeah.
	But there's a lot less of them.
	Anyway, I think she got that from me.
	Because I always said, you're going to be working for a man no matter what you do.
	Might as well be your husband.
	And I always said, yes, you're cleaning a house, but it's not a stranger's house.
	You're not a maid.
	You're cleaning your house.
	And if you'd like a shelf there, go put one there.
	And if you work cleaning, then you have to go home and clean anyway.
	Right, yeah.
	Cleaning your house is like a man cleaning his man cave.
	Like you're organizing the little bobbleheads from the Mets the way you want them.
	And you can still have that kinky thing where you hook up with your boss.
	Oh, we haven't checked in on my Mets bed in a while, by the way.
	I had it wrong.
	I'm at 580.
	Did they win last night?
	I didn't see the game.
	It was at 9.48, and I was already wasted.
	Isn't it funny that one...
	Oh, just $13.3 for the Mets.
	Wait a minute.
	That means I'm at $680.
	Dude, I'm at $680 motherfucking bucks.
	That fucking rules.
	I was wrong when I said I was negative $2.40.
	I was negative $2.40 for that week.
	I was ignoring that the bookie gave me a check, or I mean, gave me an envelope of $570 cash.
	So anyway, go back to, we weren't done with her.
	No.
	Her name is Real Femme Sapien.
	Damn.
	Like, wouldn't it be better if you were cleaning your own shelves at home?
	You know what I mean?
	And your boss wants to sleep with you in a good way.
	In a good way.
	And where do you meet these men?
	Well, I think women should work for the men that they want to pursue.
	I know that sounds crazy, but it's really easy.
	So if you think about it, like, you want a lawyer, right?
	So then you should be a paralegal.
	Or if you want a dentist, then you should be a dental hygienist.
	But these are considered, I guess, high volume status professions.
	Ryan, that's a tip.
	No, it's not.
	Think about it.
	I don't want to.
	Try it.
	What are you doing after this?
	Yeah.
	We'll do it doggy because I don't think I can get through all those layers of flesh.
	Oh, wait.
	Gays don't have vaginas.
	No.
	You already dined me.
	You know what's funny?
	I was outside of this club after we played a show one time.
	There's this gay guy, Sean, and he was like, you know, my boyfriend and me, we have a lot of sex, but my ass hurts.
	And I just, I told him, I was like, just do it in your pussy.
	Like, I literally thought he had a pussy because I'm just hearing guy fucking him, right?
	And you're a retard.
	Well, there's that.
	Good model that not enough women utilize.
	Because women will bully the woman who is the secretary that marries the doctor, okay?
	But who has the last laugh?
	Like, her in her McMansion with her husband who's not in the babies.
	Like, that's who has the last laugh.
	Yeah, one little caveat.
	You got to make sure he's single.
	I know of a secretary that fucked her boss, destroyed his family, and now he's separated from his birth kids, first kids, and now he's focused on the new kids.
	And the original kids were totally fucked over.
	I see him at baseball games, and I'm like, I guess I hate you.
	That's why I'm not fucking my boss.
	You're taken.
	Thank you.
	T. That's why Sylvia said she won't fuck me.
	I don't fuck married men.
	Good.
	Every time I see her, I'm like, hi.
	Oh, I'm sorry.
	I must have.
	So go to, just briefly show her channel so people can dig her up because that's just a random TikTok on someone else's site.
	This is her YouTube page, RealFemm Sapien, all one word.
	And really admirable.
	Like she sits there and she discusses how women can improve their lives and find a man.
	And she says shit like, give your husband all your passwords.
	You should have each other's passwords.
	You should have GPS, be able to track the person, not because you're jealous, but just because it's safer.
	And if you're, she goes, I like to jog in trails.
	Sometimes my phone dies.
	This GPS can track even when the phone's dead.
	And I want my husband to know where I am.
	She goes, men and women can't be friends.
	She says, turf, trash all your exes.
	Like, don't speak to them.
	It's not natural for you to be friends with your ex.
	He sees you as an option that you could fuck at some point.
	That's got to be erased.
	And she goes, I do have male relationships through work and various things, but my husband approves them.
	Uh-oh.
	Turf is a slur and progressives know it.
	So she is based.
	Unless that's not based.
	Who really enjoys philosophy and who learned in philosophy arguments, premises, and their conclusions.
	And I'm here to tell you, these fourth-wave feminists, they cannot make a logical argument to save their lives.
	And this week, what do you know?
	Adele was called a TERF, which I will later argue is a slur.
	Behind me, we have Janice.
	Janice fought for everything that we have as women.
	She fought for us to have the right to work, to have the right to vote, and to have the right to not get pregnant.
	So thank you, Janice.
	Yes, I know we're still fighting for things that we don't really need.
	And we don't even have a cohesive platform, cohesive argument.
	So Janice is a classical feminist, and so am I. And I will tell you why these chicks are.
	So she is saying that it's used against people who question trans negatively, to say turf.
	She uses a slur.
	That's a slang, yeah.
	But I embrace it like blacks embrace the N-word.
	I am exclusionary.
	What's the matter with exclusionary?
	Someone sent this in about how women should not be cops, and we've seen these a million times.
	By the way, when I have my little theories, I've often tested them.
	I don't just come up with shit on this show.
	I've talked to a million cops about female cops, and they always do the same thing.
	They always go, yeah, it sucks.
	It's like getting Vinned.
	Oh, my God.
	You know, the worst part, too, is they know it sucks.
	The women, so they overcompensate and get too aggressive and don't de-escalate.
	So now a fight is going down.
	So they're either useless and can't fight or useless because they overfight.
	Right.
	You know what happens a lot when you're weak and overpowered, desperation, and you have a gun.
	Oh, tune in to this next clip.
	We have one male with a gunshot wound to that.
	I hate warnings.
	Unless it's going to be like a baby with his head blown off.
	If it's not graphic dead violence, please don't warn me.
	Now she gets her gun out.
	Okay, so what happened there was she pulled over the guy.
	He's drunk.
	He grabs his gun.
	She comes up to the car cautiously.
	He just grabs her.
	She can't release his grip.
	He's too strong.
	She has already called for backup.
	He points the gun at her.
	She starts screaming like a stuck pig and says, please don't shirt me.
	Please don't shirt me.
	She's delirious.
	She's in shock.
	He kills the guy, calls for, you know, whatever medics to come and blah, blah, blah.
	Handles a situation like that.
	I don't know if there's much more of that.
	Play more.
	All right.
	Cover me, okay?
	To the side.
	To the side.
	10-4.
	10-4 rescue started.
	We'll save him.
	You don't have to worry about him, sir.
	You blew his head off.
	We're good, officer.
	Looks like he is twitching.
	Oh, that's morbid.
	All right, that's enough of that.
	Thanks.
	By the way, as a little side note here, I noticed Milo Yiannopoulos is not on Twitter, but there's an account called Milo Yiannopoulos.
	I asked Milo.
	He said, that's not me.
	I was about to ask him.
	I look fat in that picture.
	That's old fat me.
	But the fact that they allow this account is interesting.
	It's not called Not Milo.
	It's called Milo Yiannopoulos.
	Anyway, check out 29B.
	It's nothing to do with feminism.
	I just had to throw it in there because it's cops.
	Guy resists arrest and bursts into flames.
	Give me your hands.
	Give me your hands.
	I'm sorry, that's funny.
	He was covered in gas and they tased him and he bursts into flames.
	They're just letting him run away.
	Well, they grab a fire extinguisher.
	So he's got third-degree burns all over his body, of course.
	How did that happen?
	Like from a spark?
	I think they grabbed him while he was gassing up and he was like, get the fuck out of me, brother!
	Right.
	But what causes the spark?
	I guess like...
	The taser, dummy?
	I just said that.
	And then, final note on feminism.
	This just says, ladies, take it easy.
	Oh, yeah.
	So, stop, stop, stop.
	Women shouldn't be cops, and women shouldn't go to rallies that are prone to be violent, like the one where Heather Heyer was killed.
	And if you run a jewelry store and you're not armed, ladies, don't fight.
	I mean, this is not a good thing.
	I'm glad it happened.
	I'm glad she's alive.
	But ladies, take it easy, as Gavin said in the notes.
	You're looking at security footage from Princess Bride Diamonds in Honeymoon.
	That's Sunday, May 22nd at noon.
	One customer is in the store when the comb, sun-drenched Southern California day explodes with violence as four hooded figures enter the diamond shop with hammers.
	Oh, a figure.
	Okay, I'm sorry.
	As four hooded figures enter the diamond shop with hidden hammers.
	Smash and grab their way to some expensive rocks and jewelry.
	But the response from staffers, including a brother and sister who worked for their father at the family-owned business, is just as forceful.
	The footage showing them punching and kicking the attackers.
	One young woman charges toward the melee with a chair and hits one of the intruders over the head.
	You can see hammers.
	Did they get anything?
	He just said intruders.
	This guy is racist.
	Feet flying.
	Within seconds, the criminals decide to retreat.
	The fast and fierce defensive action by store employees was something the very video-heavy episode today.
	I have a feminism one that I think lacks a video.
	Our buddy Clip Clipperson, you could follow him at Clip Clipperson on YouTube.
	He does all our clips.
	Great guy.
	Great guy.
	Biological male dominates women's field and Australian surf competition.
	So not only in skateboarding, but this bloke.
	Look at that bugin.
	Look at that.
	Dusty, dusty bug.
	Good eye, Mite.
	Yeah, that's her.
	Oh, you don't even have tits?
	New rule.
	New rule.
	New rule.
	New rule.
	That's my Bill Mark.
	If you're going to be a woman, you have to have tits starting today.
	We don't mind if you don't cut your dick off.
	That's too much to ask.
	But from now on, tits only, please.
	You know what's amazing about surfing, too, is there's no way to hide that you're a dude.
	It's just your head and your body.
	Right?
	With swimmer, you could at least put that bra thing on.
	And women are pretty good at it.
	I mean, it's all about balance.
	It's not that much.
	I guess it's all about upper arm strength because you've got to get out to the wave.
	Wow, that's.
	But it's not like football where women just cannot play it at all.
	Terrible.
	$10,000.
	I'm glad that money's getting involved now.
	Right.
	Okay, I'm getting quite warm here.
	Let's get to the mailbag.
	Ryan, shut up, you don't have a debt.
	Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag.
	Let me touch it.
	This first one is called Another Religion, Another War.
	This one is for the anarchist Pogo Party.
	No, this one is called How Dangerous Is He?
	This little girl got a mantis trip.
	Why can't you?
	Yeah, I know.
	We're fucking up, dudes.
	I got a guy.
	I worked hard.
	He came back with $7,500.
	I said, no.
	I have a Canadian dude who's willing to fly down and help us.
	He says he can do $1,500.
	$1,500 I can handle.
	$7,500.
	Israel, my peacock mantis ran.
	In the pet store, they put him in the city.
	Look how beautiful it is.
	It is beautiful.
	What a beautiful, beautiful bird.
	Why did you let me down, Ryan?
	You're supposed to be a fish guy.
	Pokemon.
	Q ⁇ A with Gavin's foreskin.
	I'm gathering content for a conservative punk zine.
	I was hoping your foreskin had time for a quick Q ⁇ A.
	Boxers are briefs.
	I do briefs.
	Boxers are gay.
	Plus, they bunch up.
	How do you feel about the stigma attached to foreskin?
	I think it's fucking gay.
	Yes, I will concede that my penis, when flaccid, looks like an elephant's drunk.
	Sorry.
	I didn't know penises were supposed to be sexy.
	Have you seen a bag?
	I recently saw your cameo in the 2013 indie, How to Be a Man.
	What's your dream role?
	My dream role would be...
	These are all my foreskin talking, by the way.
	My dream role would be porn.
	I would like to go in and out of Eva Mendez's vagina.
	And then I wouldn't get in trouble from my owner's wife because it was for a movie role.
	Next time I see two gangsters sitting next to each other.
	Okay, so this one, we're warning you, is NSFW.
	It's very, very sexually explicit, if you want to call this sexual.
	But this is two intruders on the DL.
	Now we're no better than that newscaster, man.
	What the fuck is with your internet, Ryan?
	That's pathetic.
	You run a show.
	Got a lot of tabs open, frankly.
	Oh, my frick.
	I've already seen this.
	Do we need volume?
	Do you know any cops?
	You've been sent this a hundred times already.
	I'm sorry, guys.
	There's no volume.
	You're just going to have to deal with the...
	Hey, man, can I eat your ass right now?
	Yeah, just sit on my face and rub your ass crack on my face.
	Okay, but we got to hurry up, dude.
	I just want to lick it.
	Yeah, alright.
	I got it.
	You know what?
	I'm done.
	I'm done.
	Okay, fine, fine, fine.
	I appreciate it.
	Yeah, whatever, dude.
	I got the mask on.
	I hate germs.
	I wear my COVID mask.
	You see that we're being filmed?
	You proud of yourself?
	Can I casual?
	Be like, yeah, yeah, we could just.
	Wow.
	There's a monkeypox update we should read.
	Luckily, it's written in pidgin English.
	I have problems reading normal English.
	Monkeypox.
	Give people the more at risk to catch monkeypox.
	See what in scientists talk about how you fit catch am.
	But many cases for the current outbreak for Europe, done they identified in males, they done Involved in sex with other males, and this one done raise concerns.
	But monkeypox not take considered as a sexually transmitted infection, according to health authorities.
	WHO EXPANDICIL say, While we day see some cases in men are no bigger disease, as some people on social media done liberal arm, anybody can contract this disease through close contact.
	So good to know.
	Be careful out there, folks, especially pigeons.
	And be careful, English.
	There's a brand new language nipping at your heels.
	Yeah.
	It's more efficient than regular English.
	According to what's his name?
	Nas.
	Nas.
	Okay, last letter, Black Proud Boy banned.
	Now, you might recognize this guy as the man behind me, Hussein Hill.
	You know, when we do a Proud Boy segment, there's a black guy right here?
	This is him.
	Very intelligent chap, this guy, who has just been banned.
	He's permanently disbanded from Twitter in the wake of thought patrolling.
	He's officially the most banned gentleman in North Carolina.
	Where we're moving, eventually.
	Welcome back to another amazing, epic, a large-in-life narrative assassin update video with your host, the most banned man in New Carl.
	Zoom out so people can watch this on their own time.
	I'm fucking sweating like a pig here.
	We gotta stop the show.
	Usain Hill.
	All right, let's get to the final vid.
	So we go in the show with the final bird.
	This dude might be the best guy in the world.
	You don't often meet the best person in the world.
	Sometimes you worry that you're the best guy in the world.
	I don't want to be the best guy in the world.
	I want there to be better guys out there.
	And apparently there are.
	I don't know who this is.
	I don't know his name.
	I don't know what makes him tick, but I know he's fucking awesome.
	Take it away, wicked dude.
	Make sure you have everything perfect, Ryan.
	Yes.
	Volume up?
	Yes.
	Okay, go.
	Get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.
	Man turns his back on his family.
	Well, he just ain't no good.
	We Frankie went in the army back in 1965.
	Oh my god, I'm so fucking hot.
	Oh.
	Oh.
	Tell you what.
	This Arctic Explorer North Face works.
	Jesus.
	Look at this.
	I had to use Foo Pottec.
	A boy sweatshirt.
	And then, look at this.
	Among other things, a FU-boo jacket.
	I got these in the Bronx.
	Look, there's about 40 newspapers in there.
	The great thing about fat people pants is you can wear, you can take them off with your shoes on.
	It's free.
	Middle of night was lacking.
	But I got a call about a quarter cent.
	Girls troubling a roof out on the Michigan lines.
	There was a kid lying on the floor, looking fast.
	Bleeding heart crazy.

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