Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool

All Episodes

Previous Next

May 13, 2022 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

01:36:13

S4E115 - THE PERFECT SHOW

Large

Audio Only |

Scroll

Time	Text
	Live from New York, it's Get Up Money One with Devin Gibbon with Devin Easy,
	Easy, Chaka, Cha, Booma, Booma, Booma, Gutcha, Buffy, That is, of course, Kayak Kayakacha by Atoikin.
	They are a Siberian Aboriginal band that kind of does harappy dance music.
	And I plan to fly over there and steal that drummer and just make her mine.
	She'll get Stockholm Syndrome.
	It could take two years.
	But I need her.
	I'll have to kill my wife too, of course.
	The singer's a little too Asian for me, but that drummer is an 11.
	Pretty muscular legs on those broads.
	Those Siberian broads.
	But yeah, that's a hot new band out of Siberia.
	Look at that woman.
	I looked all over for more pictures of her.
	She's hard to find.
	It's not like a Korean boy band.
	Look at that 11.
	That's the perfect woman as far as I'm concerned.
	Cartoon kind of a Bambi face.
	What do you think, Ryan?
	She's got juleps.
	What would you give her out of 10?
	I have to see her again, but I trust your instincts.
	I think she's 8-ish.
	I go 10.
	You go 10.
	I know.
	Well, that's a little high for me.
	No, it's not.
	For me.
	Look, you people, I always get shit for rating women too high, and then none of you ever say 10.
	So what's your scale?
	Meanwhile, the guys saying this kind of shit are all sixes.
	What do you think you are, Ryan?
	Like a 7.3.
	Yeah.
	I'm not an 8.
	Obviously not.
	Well, what about the part where you're a midget, though?
	Doesn't that bring you down?
	No.
	Because you ever meet like a guy who's really built?
	I'm going to be that guy soon.
	And you never say Aaron Berg.
	Yeah.
	But you never say, oh, it's a short guy.
	You're like, oh, you know, he's kind of big.
	No, you never.
	And then they do this.
	They go, he's kind of big.
	Yeah, they go, he's a short guy who hates that he's short because he should.
	And he's working out like crazy to try to make up for it.
	Well, that's not what I'm doing.
	I'm doing that so I can be strong.
	What the hell?
	You have Down syndrome.
	I don't.
	I'm strong.
	I'd like to transform it.
	Yes, you're strong.
	You have retard strength.
	Yes, but also muscles not too.
	We've got a great show for you today.
	We worked very hard.
	I had an epiphany recently where I was comparing American Patriot groups and then black and brown revolutionaries.
	The black and brown revolutionaries seem much more insurrectionisty and much more racist than the first group, the patriot groups, yet the patriot groups are always called racist insurrectionists when it's just the opposite is true when we're comparing these three groups.
	I don't even call the first group a white group, but they're called that by the media.
	So I figured out why.
	And we'll get to that.
	That's a surprise coming up.
	It's going to dominate most of the show.
	Big-ass motherfucking green screen, yo.
	But yeah, let's have some fun before we do that.
	I was going to use Troglodyte, the new Viagra Boys single, as the intro to the show.
	It's also fucking amazing.
	I'm just, I've been in this game since for a long time.
	I was in a band when I was 17.
	I'm 51 now, and I'm just marveled that people can still make music that inspires me and sounds cool and original.
	Oh shit, that's sick.
	Usually they have just like album art.
	That's a static picture.
	And this one moves.
	Yeah, I can't hear shit though.
	Go back to the beginning.
	And the punishment to the face.
	But things that would play out much different.
	Back in the time when we were race.
	I had a problem at Gavstav Rikers.
	I got to come up with a cool name for my house, which is a prison, and I'm a CO.
	So I had to cut down on the prisoners using the washing and washer and dryer.
	The bills are up to $50 a day.
	I mean, I could own a laundromat for that.
	So the prisoners have been fighting back.
	They've been doing things like fluffing up their dirty laundry by putting in clean laundry and even their mother's clothes because they claim, oh, it was on the floor in my room.
	No, it wasn't.
	And I check for stains, which gets gross because you're worried about jizz stains and other embarrassing menstrual stains and poo stains and stuff.
	So I managed to control it a little bit.
	I camp out late by the laundry machine because it's right next to my home bar, Gavstav.
	But I'm having trouble with one of the female prisoners, my daughter.
	So I come in and I hear it tumbling in the dryer.
	I don't know how she got past me.
	I must have been away or going to get something.
	But I hear it tumbling in the dryer.
	I'm like, that doesn't sound like a full load.
	And you know what this prisoner said?
	It's not.
	Whoa, no fear.
	Like, if the warden and the COs can't intimidate the prisoners.
	We have anarchy.
	We have burning mattresses thrown out of their cells.
	And I go, What's in there?
	And she goes, Not allowed.
	And I go, Well, that's not allowed.
	And she goes, Oh.
	You know what I'm dealing with here?
	She's the fucking IRA.
	She's Bobby Sands.
	She's on a hunger strike.
	She's throwing feces at me as I go by herself from the fucking food slot.
	Mail slot.
	The food slot.
	And I went and checked, and lo and behold, there was a large towel, which is a bullshit thing.
	It could have been a brand new freshly washed towel.
	I take that out.
	There's maybe this much clothes.
	And it reminded me when she was about six.
	We were visiting the in-laws in Atlanta, and we went to some big fancy aquarium there.
	And the four-year-old boy, my youngest boy wasn't yet born, was walking along some sort of edge, not as high as his desk, but almost.
	And his sister just shoves him, and he falls off.
	Oh, he's crying.
	How could you say that?
	And I go, first of all, I was pissed off.
	But secondly, I couldn't look like we let that get away because the grandpa was there.
	My father-in-law is called grandpa.
	You know what they call my dad?
	What?
	Other grandpa.
	He always goes, how am I other grandpa?
	I go, someone had to be.
	You showed up late.
	The why of things.
	And so it's fucking hot.
	We're in the south, right?
	And I make her stand in front of a tree, like with her head to the tree.
	And usually back then you would do timeouts.
	It's a year per minute, a minute per year.
	Sorry.
	So she was six at the time.
	So that's six minutes.
	Meanwhile, I'm boiling my ass off.
	And I go, you are getting a timeout right here, right now.
	And I guess my mom dealt with the crying boy.
	And I stood there and made sure she didn't look and just stood at the tree.
	And you know what she did?
	She went, okay.
	And then just sat there staring at the tree for six minutes, didn't budge.
	My youngest boy, when I would give him timeouts, he was always trying to wriggle.
	I'd sometimes have to hold him there in the corner as he wriggled free.
	She's just like this, like, like she went inside.
	In fact, it's funny that I'm using a jail analogy because I would tell this story.
	It's a seven-year-old story.
	And my joke back then was that she came out and she had a pack of cigarettes because it's money in there.
	And she had tattoos and she just had like an undershirt and then her orange coveralls were tied around her waist and she was doing push-ups.
	So we're going to have some trouble with the teenage girl here.
	She's not scared of the corrections officer.
	In other news, Tinkerbell's dead.
	You can check my getter for a photo, Ryan.
	But Sylvia's debut included Tinkerbell coming in here and shitting all over everything.
	We still have her piss stains on this runner.
	And when I went to pick up Sylvia yesterday in the South Bronx at her incredibly dangerous apartment building that looks like something out of the 1920s, it's all dark and gray.
	It looks like the apartment's in Mean Streets.
	But I picked her up there and the dog was like staring at me.
	She goes, he wants you to pick him up.
	He wants you to pick him up.
	He loves you.
	He wants you.
	Or she does.
	She wants you.
	She loves you.
	And I'm like, okay.
	The dog has, go down, Ryan.
	We don't need the text.
	She's got like cataracts in her eye.
	Her eyes are just not like that.
	They're completely milky.
	Well, I don't know what they are now.
	And so I don't want to touch this dog.
	Plus, it shits everywhere.
	So I go to pick it up just for her.
	And he goes, and bites me.
	And then she goes, oh, it's because he doesn't know you.
	Like, you just said he loves me.
	She loves me.
	Sorry, I'm misgendering this dog.
	Anyway, she goes, I'll put him on the bed.
	He'll be okay.
	So she picks him up.
	She puts him.
	I don't know, why do I keep calling it him?
	She puts her on the bed.
	And then she goes, all right, let's go.
	And she gets on her walker and she opens the door.
	And the Chihuahua goes and stretches out and cries.
	She goes, she's never cried like that before.
	And then we get back.
	I drop off Sylvia.
	I'm dying to get a beer too.
	Every time I drop her off, I'm like, here you go.
	Throw the walker in, slam the door.
	Bye.
	And as I dropped her off, there was Tinkerbell.
	She was in her little pad, sorry, her little sleeping nook.
	And she got up and they had a nice night.
	And then in the middle of the night, Sylvia couldn't sleep and the dog came over next to her and lay next to her on the floor.
	And then in the morning, dead as a doornail.
	So innocent, so full of me.
	There were times we were friends, but times I was so cruel.
	The show was dedicated to Tinkerbell.
	To Tinkerbell.
	I feel bad for Sylvia, but to be totally frank, I was never a big fan of Tinkerbell.
	In other news.
	By the way, I always have explosive diarrhea after I eat at that Cuban place.
	And it's just become part of like, it's like going to having a nice lunch and then also getting a, what do you call it?
	Not a colonoscopy.
	An enema.
	An enema.
	And then I started thinking, maybe that's what that style of food is.
	Uh-oh, who's this?
	Me, who must.
	Joseph Biggs.
	Joe Biggs.
	An incarcerated individual at Alexandria Detention Center.
	This call is not private.
	It will be recorded and may be monitored.
	If you believe this should be a private call, please hang up and follow facility instructions to register this number as a private number.
	To accept this free call, press 1.
	To refuse the spree, thank you for using Securis.
	You may start the conversation now.
	What's up, Joe?
	We're recording a show.
	You're on the air.
	Is that allowed?
	Oh, yeah, yeah, sure.
	Why not?
	What's up, Joe?
	So I have to say the stupidest thing that everyone says when they get a call from prison, which is, how's it going?
	It's fantastic, man.
	You know, I live in a 7x9 concrete solitary confinement cell and stare at concrete walls all day.
	Twiddle my thumbs and I've read about 200 books now.
	I've become pretty much an expert on radical Islamic jihad.
	Reading every book there is about it that they have here.
	I don't know why they have that many books about that here, but they do.
	You know, I was thinking about when we spoke last, and I spent a lot of time recently bitching about radical Islam, and it definitely is a problem in the West, especially in Britain and Europe.
	But I'm realizing now I should have spent more time on Marxism.
	Yeah.
	I think Marx.
	They're indoctrinating our kids at a young age.
	I mean, it's funny, though.
	They're sitting there screaming and yelling about abortion.
	But at the same time, everybody on the right's going, why don't they care about the babies?
	There's a baby formula for, well, because they don't care about kids in the first place.
	They want to kill them.
	If they can't kill them in the womb, they're going to make sure they starve to death.
	I mean, that's just what these people do.
	And if the kid does survive and it does get born, then they're going to indoctrinate it at a young age until it grows up to become a screaming purple-haired idiot.
	Yeah.
	Marxism pretends to be about the working man.
	Meanwhile, it was the working blue collar.
	Everyone who stormed the Bastilles, everyone who was part of the January 6th meandering was blue-collar.
	These were all the workers the communists keep talking about, but you totally turn your back on them when they have a real revolution.
	I mean, according to the mainstream narrative, it was a revolution.
	Because it's not about the workers, and it's not about the poor.
	It's about sabotaging Western society and Christianity and the family.
	It's really a poison pill.
	Yeah, well, what radical Islamic jihadis do as well, too, is they get a council, a Muslim council, and this is what al-Qaeda and other radical groups would do, is they form a council and then they appoint an Islamic scholar over that council.
	And then from there, they issue whether or not a person or group of people are considered takfir, T-A-K-I-F-R.
	If you're taxier, that means that they can now issue a fatwa against you.
	So if you're tax fear, that means you don't believe in what they believe in.
	The left is basically issuing a tax fear on Christians and the right wing.
	And then from that, they've issued their own fatwa just like Al-Zarwali did and Obama, I mean Osama bin Laden, but yeah, Obama too.
	And they are going after these people and going, okay, so normally what we do to people is wrong, or if we do this to civilians, it's wrong.
	But if we issue a fatwa, it's no longer wrong.
	And that's what they say, is that the things that they can do with a fatwa can be considered criminal normally until the fatwa is issued.
	And that's what we're seeing happen with the left versus the right right now.
	Yeah, it reminds me of those two lawyers who got, they refused a plea deal of a year, and they ended up facing two years.
	These are the guys who threw a Molotov cocktail into a police car.
	That's fiery, but mostly peaceful, though.
	Okay, man, we got to go.
	We got to get back to the show.
	But call me later on.
	All right, see you guys.
	See ya.
	We're getting visits from getting calls from prison every day.
	I got to find that.
	Where did I put that?
	Where we had the guys who...
	Oh, yeah.
	Look under 3-0, Ryan.
	Those are the guys I was just talking about.
	When I was in Britain with Tommy Robinson, we used a minivan to get to the speech, the free speech rally that Tommy put on in London.
	And I was way at the back.
	You know those ones that if you really try, you can get two more seats at the very, very back and you're hunched in, right?
	The police stopped us getting to our destination and we're interrogating Tommy.
	Now, for all I know, there's some sort of concentrated effort or an Antifa notices this.
	They throw a fucking Molotov cocktail through the back window.
	I'm covered in burning gas now.
	This is obviously a hypothetical.
	But like, even when we want to get out and everything's peaceful, they've got to open the side door.
	Then these two get out.
	Then they put down the seats.
	Then those three get out.
	Then they slide one of those seats forward.
	And then me and the other fat bastard can get out.
	That's when things are peaceful.
	When they're fiery, I might just sit there and burn to death.
	What a horrific death that would be.
	I almost had a panic attack when I was there.
	I was like, just go, go.
	Like, go through the police barricade.
	We're going to die.
	And that's how those cops would have died.
	And what do they get?
	They get a plea deal of a year.
	They say, fuck you.
	I'm not going to jail for a year just because I try to burn cops alive.
	What?
	I'm the bad guy now?
	I was fighting for civil rights and Marxism.
	So now they're down to, well, it could be five if the judge wants to really go crazy, but they're looking at about two years.
	Max and John get four for fighting Antifa for 17 seconds.
	Joe Biggs, he's about a year and a half in.
	He's almost done their sentence.
	And what did he do?
	He meandered in to the Capitol.
	He said he had to use the bathroom.
	He asked a cop where the bathroom is.
	The cop said right there.
	And then when he got out, the cop said, you should go now.
	And he goes, okay.
	That's his crime.
	Go down?
	I want you to put a face to a name.
	Colin Ferd Madison.
	Now, I used to think last week it's because they're people of color they get a pass.
	I'm now realizing this week it's because they're Marxists.
	It's not the color of her skin up top, it's her t-shirt that got her off.
	You know what?
	We should stop fucking around and get right to the green screen.
	This is exactly what today's main focus is, and there's no sense in beating around the bush any goddamn more.
	it's okay to be a nationalist.
	I would go further than that.
	You should be a nationalist.
	Everyone's a fucking nationalist.
	It's redundant.
	Ever see the World Cup?
	What do you have on your car if you're from Brazil?
	You have a Brazilian flag.
	It goes family, community.
	I don't know.
	Religion is in there somewhere.
	Then nation.
	That's the way it goes everywhere.
	Unfortunately, with Islam, it goes religion first.
	Even family is after that.
	But they're incompatible with the West.
	We don't talk about non-Western concepts on this show.
	So nationalists are great.
	We're not talking about white nationalists, but if they're nationalists who happen to be, I don't know, even like normally white, like represented as they are in the population, those are called white nationalists, which is unacceptable.
	They're called insurrectionists.
	They're called racists.
	They never are.
	However, if you're brown or black and you're a nationalist and an insurrectionist and a racist, you're known as a freedom fighter.
	And there's strange rationale for this.
	God, this microphone smells like Sylvia's perfume.
	There's strange rationale for this.
	One of them is, well, in the latter, they lack power and they are just exercising their civil rights because they live in an unjust society.
	They say it was cool when the Black Panthers stormed the Capitol, armed, and I guess that was like 68 or something.
	That was cool and exciting because they're fighting oppression.
	When predominantly white people do it, though there was plenty of non-black people that stormed the Capitol, that's racism.
	Okay?
	Why?
	Why do you have a different set of standards?
	And why do you always say the opposite of what's true?
	Well, the real truth of it is, if a predominantly white or even normally white group of nationalists get too much power, they'll start an American Nazi party wherein they will start slaughtering the same people that Nazis slaughtered.
	And I think the Nazis slaughtered, obviously, mostly Jews, but they slaughtered clowns, they slaughtered gays, they slaughtered everyone that didn't fit their Aryan narrative.
	And we'll go through that again in a thing called World War III, which we saw on Star Trek the other day.
	They pretended that the insurrection led to World War III and mass genocide of everyone, but mostly plants and animals, they added for some bizarre reason.
	And you think of that and you go, I don't believe you.
	As Jared Taylor, the wildly controversial Jared Taylor said, such a concept is fantastic.
	And of course, he means fantastical.
	He means phantasmagoric.
	He means of fantasy, like Lord of the Rings.
	It's a Lord of the Rings concept that oath keepers or proud boys need to be extra monitored.
	The hate watch groups have to focus on them because if they don't, they'll start a new Nazi party.
	Do you want to know what the truth of it is?
	I can't hear you.
	I can't hear you.
	Come on, guys.
	We work hard on this show.
	You're sitting there in your living room saying, meh, I need to hear it loud.
	There we go.
	Yeah.
	There we go.
	Now we're cooking.
	It's Marxism.
	That's the difference.
	These patriotic groups that are called white nationalists and are not tend to hate the government and they hate socialism.
	They hate big government.
	They hate the idea of the government handling their problems.
	They want independence and freedom.
	All of the brown and black nationalists are obsessed with socialism.
	And I noticed this when I went undercover in Black Lives Matter for Project Veritas as a punk guy named Bobby, I believe.
	This was many, before I was this famous and I could get away with hiding.
	I met one of their stupid meeting spots.
	And there's reams and reams of propaganda.
	There's sort of hand-printed zines.
	And it's all black power, but it's all intimately intertwined with Marxism.
	And lots of red fists.
	And black power and communism seem inseparable at this point.
	And it always bothered me.
	Those two concepts seem incongruous.
	You know what communism is?
	It's gray and olive green army fatigues.
	And it's slaving away in the gulag on the farms, digging holes.
	Labor, labor, labor.
	It's devoid of color.
	It's devoid of food.
	Like black people make fun of white people for not having spice on their food.
	Not only is there no spice on your feud in a communist dictatorship, there's no fucking food.
	So I understand some like crusty punk wanting to live like that.
	It's better than being a crackhead on the street.
	But black culture in America, especially sort of lower middle class and blue collar, is very bright colors, lots of flavorful food, and not a lot of toiling in the soil.
	Not a lot of hole digging.
	That's more of a Mexican thing these days.
	So it just seems strange to me that those two would be merged, but they are.
	And that is the crux of the different hate perspective you have in America.
	It's got nothing to do with racism at all, although they make it 100% about that.
	It's got nothing to do with insurgency.
	The reason January 6th is treated differently than, say, the not fucking around coalition is because the not fucking around coalition wants more government, more socialism, more Marxism.
	Now, it's a strange position to be in for the government because a lot of these radical groups, especially in Mexico and Central America, South America, they're anti-government to the point of terrorism.
	So the government sort of likes Antifa.
	They like BLM, but they don't really like, you know, La Raza.
	Or no, they love La Raza, but FSLN or EZLN.
	The Mexican government and the Nicaraguan government don't really like their socialists because they're direct action terrorists.
	However, who controls the American conversation?
	Who controls the Western conversation?
	Not so much the government.
	The media.
	And the media are dyed in the wool Marxists.
	They grew up in a Marxist indoctrination camp called the public education system.
	And they control how we perceive those around us.
	And if you're Marxist, you're good.
	If you're not, you're evil.
	And going with racism for the evil thing, it's just the go-to bad guy.
	Could have been pedophile, could have been ageist, could have been violent.
	They throw violent in sometimes too.
	They would have said climate change denier if that had any stigma, but they've decided just to throw racist on it because that's how it works.
	So anyway, I want to go through some nationalists who are called white nationalists, some brown nationalists, and some black nationalists.
	And you'll notice the only difference with these groups is, and the way they're treated, is the first group that are called the white nationalists, the white people, are anti-Marxist.
	So let's start out with the Oath Kepers.
	They're in prison right now.
	They're facing 20 years for doing what the Black Panthers did in the 60s, storming the Capitol.
	They were invited in by the police.
	They are a multi-ethnic group, yet they're known as evil insurrectionists.
	Go to that link there where the guy says, we're purple, black, brown, we're everything.
	I mean, the Oath Keepers I just see as like slightly more military tea party guys.
	Older boomers, they tend to have veteran experience.
	But it keeps coming up.
	Is that the first link, Ryan?
	Terrorism Center dives into how the Oath Keepers originated and how they're evolving.
	This line from the report stood out to us.
	Quote, the group has used a warped sense of patriotism, loose enforcement of laws surrounding paramilitary activity, and America's founding revolutionary spirit to justify anti-government mobilization.
	That's good.
	Except for the word warped.
	Joining us now are the authors of this report.
	John Lewis is a revolutionary.
	No, that's not what I'm looking for, dude.
	Is that under the They Are Evil Insurrectionists with the time code?
	Yeah, there's that one, but the one before it should have some old dude who was their leader saying we're black, brown, purple.
	That was it with the time code or the middle dude.
	With the evil insurrectionists?
	Yeah, 31 seconds.
	Huh.
	Okay, yeah, this is...
	Go to the other one.
	This is Oath Keeper's Racism.
	Oath Keeper's leader defends Confederate flag.
	These fucking Marxist loser hate watchers comb through hundreds of hours of footage of these patriot groups to try to find evidence of racism.
	They totally ignore the blacks and the browns that are in the club and the Jews and the Asians.
	And then they find one guy who defends a Confederate flag, which is a pretty non-controversial thing to do.
	If you go down 95 towards Delaware, there is a Confederate flag flapping right off the highway that is the size of this building.
	Now, you can be for or against that, but clearly it's not a swastika.
	A swastika would last a day.
	There.
	God damn, this microphone is perfumed.
	And where are the Oath Keepers today?
	They're in jail.
	What kind of celebrity endorsements do these groups have?
	Zero.
	Which brings us to the Tea Party.
	Remember the Tea Party?
	They're just boomers who are fiscally conservative, perfectly normal moms and dads.
	And what were they called in the LA Times?
	Is that the LA Times?
	No.
	Yeah, see, this is sort of like that Holocaust denial thing that the Prowboys were accused of where they were celebrating the synagogue shooting, which wasn't even remotely true.
	It was basically a Tea Party event where they dress up in old-timey founding fathers costumes.
	And the media twisted that into celebrating a synagogue shooting.
	Anyway, it's the same shit that the Tea Party gets.
	The nation is still hungover from the Tea Party.
	Don't let 2022 midterms be a repeat.
	And this is the L.A. Times talking about how ultimately evil the Tea Party was.
	The Tea Party was the most basic, normal, right-of-center mom-and-dad party ever.
	And they crowbarred racism into that because these people were anti-Marxist, anti-socialist, wanted less government.
	They're just fiscally conservative boomers.
	And who thinks they were secretly racist?
	Well, our favorite guy in the world who makes a cameo approximately every single episode, Mr. Non-Prescription Glasses, Eddie Gloud.
	See, the thing is that when the Tea Party was happening, we were saying pundits, oh, it's just about economic populism.
	It is.
	It's not about race.
	When people knew, people knew social scientists were already writing that what was driving the Tea Party were anxieties about demographic shifts, that the country was changing, that they were seeing these racially ambiguous babies on Cheerios commercials.
	That was it.
	That the country wasn't a white nation anymore.
	And people were screaming from the top of their lungs, yo, this is not just simply economic populism.
	This is the ugly underbelly of the country.
	See, the thing is, is this, and I'll say this, and I'll take the hit on it.
	There are communities that have had to bear the brunt of America confronting, white Americans confronting the danger of their innocence.
	And it happens every generation.
	So somehow we have to kind of, oh my God.
	Okay, so anyway, he goes off.
	He forgets about the tea party and that thing.
	Imagine being a student in one of his classes and just, and not being a moron who goes, wow.
	You'd just be going, you'd be looking around, you're going, we're listening to a fucking snake oil salesman.
	Is anyone falling for this shit?
	Do you know how many times he said, bear the brunt?
	I'm marking it down.
	That's 13.
	Anyway, group three, the three percenters.
	Three percenters.
	I've even seen people attack the name.
	So three percent refers to the Americans who dared to fight back against Britain.
	They say only three percent of the, what, colonists dared to fight back against Britain.
	They say the commonly debunked myth that it was only 3% that fought against the British.
	Okay, sorry.
	And these Guys are very similar to the Oath Keepers.
	They tend to be vets, sex cops.
	Oh, there's a black dude.
	Uh-oh.
	And they're perfectly normal human beings.
	Remember, every group I'm listing here is either extinct or in jail.
	The oath keepers are in jail.
	The Tea Party are extinct.
	The 3%ers are in jail because the SPLC decides they may be multiracial, but they associate with white nationalists.
	So the way they do this thing, they say you're white power adjacent.
	And the way they get that is say you're at a thing where you're like, we shouldn't have CRT in schools.
	Everyone agrees with that, who's saying, right?
	Everyone slightly right of center, including a few Nazis.
	So a couple Nazis show up at your thing, unbeknownst to you.
	Oh, that's the clip I was looking at before.
	Sorry, I got the wrong guy.
	So stop it there.
	And then they go, oh, I spotted like some clan dude who also agrees with you.
	All cats are mammals.
	All dogs are mammals.
	Therefore, all cats are dogs.
	And they say you're white power adjacent.
	Go back to the clip.
	Go back to the beginning of him.
	So he's their new leader right now.
	The group is black, white, green, yellow, purple.
	We did not discriminate.
	We are not racist.
	We believe that everybody's stuck to freak.
	White, yes.
	Yellow, I work with a yellow guy, Ryan Katsu Rivera.
	Green means they have food poisoning.
	And purple means that person's suffocating, dude.
	You've got to pop a hole in their trachea and get a straw in there.
	I don't want to hang around with green or purple people.
	They're ill.
	They're dying.
	We have whites, Asians, and dying people in our group.
	Sorry, go ahead.
	And freedom of speech.
	But the SPLC says some chapters associate with extreme racist groups, have been involved in attacks on immigrants and Muslims, and that some members participated in the 2017 Charlottesville rally.
	I think in the case of this.
	Oh, our old Heidi Byrick.
	She was promptly discommunicated after I started my suit against the SPLC.
	That was one of my many victories with that suit.
	I already considered it a success, even though it's sitting on the judge's lap and moving about a quarter inch every century.
	At least the founder, Morris Dees, quit.
	The president, Richard Morris, quit, and Heidi Byrick, their top researcher, done turfed and their head of legal because they knew in discovery all of their corrupt emails would come out and they didn't want to be part of it.
	Bye, bitch.
	Bye-bye.
	Home to mommy.
	And then, of course, the whole impetus for this segment is the Proud Boys, right?
	Constantly called racist, constantly called insurrectionist.
	And just like the three percenters, they are currently in prison.
	We've got Ethan Nordine calling us from prison.
	Joe Biggs, those guys are fucking, they keep telling me Tiny Tulsa is Tiny Tulsa.
	His last name is literally impossible to say.
	In fact, the way I check to make sure it's not someone trying to trick me when he calls his, I say, say your last name, your entire name, actually.
	And no one could possibly fake it.
	Yeah, Proud Boys constantly called insurrectionists and nationalists.
	And it's not because they are white or they have white members.
	It's because they are anti-Marxist.
	Which brings us to category two, brown nationalists.
	That was back when they did that segment, by the way.
	That was back when I recognized every Proud Boy.
	Now I look at pictures.
	Oh, I love that part.
	Wait, show that part.
	That's their spokesman.
	Yeah, fighting solves everything.
	They're playing into a long line of what would be normally called white nationalism.
	The soy boy fucking generation has overtaken and there is no output.
	The output is no longer.
	That's the spokesman where the Australian guy doing that documentary says, well, I've seen a lot of non-white members.
	And he goes, that doesn't belie their racist policies.
	Yes, it does.
	And I would argue that there's not as many non-whites in the group as they say there are.
	Touche.
	Touche, SBLC.
	All right, so sorry, brown nationalists.
	So let's start with the most obvious one, of course, the movement.
	And in all of these, I'm going to talk about the celebrity endorsements these groups get.
	The first group, right, are never celebrity endorsed.
	They're either extinct or in jail.
	Brown and black nationalists are always supported by celebrities, and that's because they're Marxists, and that's because the media supports it.
	So if you're a pro-Marxist, you're doing the media's bidding, and you're part of the in crowd.
	So the movement was the name of Fidel Castro's movement when he stormed Cuba.
	Weird place to put a headline, Ryan, on the bottom.
	And we know what happened with Fidel.
	He rallied a bunch of farmers and convinced them that the evil elites were controlling the country and they need to be destroyed.
	That worked after some rough first passes.
	And then Fidel quickly became a dictator himself.
	These guys were racist, by the way.
	Shea Guevara hated blacks, hated homosexuals, saw them as inferior, and murdered them.
	Murdered them on their knees, shot them in the back of the head as they fell into pits.
	That was the Shea Guevara that Jay-Z is wearing a Shea Guevara shirt.
	Shea Guevara hated these.
	He called them monkeys.
	But because the media supports this narrative, we forget all that.
	And it's a cool shirt to wear.
	Fucking Mike Tyson has a tattoo of Mao and a tattoo of Shea Guevara.
	You see the pride flag right next to the Shea Guevara flag?
	He would not like that.
	Shea Guevara personally single-handedly murdered about 3,000 people.
	The same people, by the way, that we hear the Nazis, when we start World War III and the 3%ers turn into the American Nazi Party, they're going to be killing blacks and gays.
	No, that guy did.
	And you're wearing him on a fucking shirt, you retards.
	It was Prime Minister of Canada's dad.
	Yeah, so what's the intro there with the movement?
	So he took over Cuba And he's totally supported by celebrities.
	They love him, especially Shay.
	Go to the Hollywood Loves Them link.
	Hi, I'm Nick Gillespie from Reason TV.
	Do you ever wonder what happens when a celebrity plays a celebrity?
	Well, you get the new epic film where A-lister Benicio Del Toro plays A-lister.
	The union of the two cruel was so intense that Conn, the glitziest film festival of them all.
	Benicio Del Toro.
	The man Del Toro depicted shot to a level of stardom that few A-listers reach.
	The one-word name.
	Before there was Oprah, Bono, or Madonna, there was Che.
	Che's the celebrity that celebrities adore.
	That's him on Johnny Depp's neck.
	And Che is just about all Giselle Bunchon is wearing.
	Che burst onto the scene a half century ago as an idealistic revolutionary who helped found communist Cuba.
	Today, his rebellious image is used to sell countless products.
	Beer, flasks, belt buckles, lighters, fast food.
	The best-known Che product is the t-shirt.
	The Che shirts are so-called.
	Right next to Leonard Skinner.
	People wear t-shirts of his t-shirt.
	Go to most any kind of protests and you're bound to see Che.
	And from hip-hop to rock to pop, musicians really dig Che.
	But is this a case of unrequited love?
	He hate artists.
	So how is it possible that artists still today support?
	Well, that's some Cuban musician who said.
	You know, I have a friend who is Cuban and he was rich.
	They took his parents' house and made it into a government building.
	It's like the Ministry of Transportation now.
	So they have all these beautiful government buildings.
	They're just millionaires' old homes.
	They came here with zero dollars, rich people, because it's a crime to be rich.
	All right, so the movement was the modern progenitor of all the cool socialist groups.
	And then, of course, we have the Sandinista National Liberation Front.
	In Spanish, they're known as the Frente Sandinista de Liberación Nacional, F-S-L-N.
	By the way, I made a mistake when I was on Compound Censored with Anthony Cumille, and I said that the Romans learned their colonization skills from the Muslims, the Moors in Spain.
	I meant to say the conquistadors.
	The Spanish conquistadors who dominated the Caribbean, they learned their tricks from the Moors, the Muslims in Spain.
	And the trick is you fuck the locals and you make a new race of people and then you tax everyone and use it to fund the future colonization, which is why you have Puerto Ricans.
	These weird Spanish-looking, half-white, half-Aztec Mayans, these little funny-looking men who control, you know, TriCasters and co-host shows.
	And you're like, are you white or are you a little fucking land turtle?
	And you go, oh, I'm a Puerto Rican.
	Oh, I see what you are.
	You know what I mean?
	So what's the first link on the Sandinistas?
	Oh, yeah, it's just B-roll about them.
	So these are, of course, Nicaraguans that want independence.
	They just want the government to give them all their land.
	All of these revolutionary groups are just like, I want money from the government and land from the government.
	You want free shit.
	Okay, that's appealing to poor people.
	Joint, you can either stay poor and keep farming out here in the middle of nowhere, or you can join my revolutionary group where we get free money and free land.
	I like the second option.
	So FSLN, there were the Contras, right?
	Yeah, the Contras were Ronald Reagan used cocaine money to fund the revolutionaries who were the American, the pro-freedom guys.
	He got in big shit for that.
	Sounds reasonable to me.
	It's better than Vietnam, where we lost 60,000 men to go fight communism.
	Just pay the local guys there, give them some guns, and they can fight the commies.
	That's a deal.
	But if you are a Nicaraguan nationalist, a Sandinista, you're fucking cool, which is why The Clash named an album after them.
	Look at that.
	In praise of Sandinista.
	Well, they're praising the album, but Joe Strummer was clearly praising the Sandinistas.
	He was a rich kid who went to a bunch of different cool private schools.
	And in these schools, they learn multiculturalism is awesome because, and then they learn the finest thing about that culture.
	You know what I mean?
	Like they learn about Morocco and the delicious little fucking coffees they have and the monkey that is running around the restaurant.
	And they don't learn about it's a capital offense to be gay and they hang you.
	They ignore that and they just learn the fun stuff.
	So he sees Sandinistas and they got their guns and it sounds cool.
	I mean, I thought it was cool when I was 18 too.
	I hate to disparage my old pal, Joe Strummer, but the glorification of these rebels is remarkable upper white middle class naivete.
	And who loves them besides the clash?
	Why, of course, oh no, sorry.
	That's a different...
	We move on to the next one.
	So the third group of brown nationalists is, of course, the Zapatista Army of National Liberation, which in Spanish is the Liberación Nacional, E-Z-L-N,
	socialist group.
	Mostly the little Mayans, you know, those guys that mow your lawn that seem remarkably short?
	That's the ones that didn't get enough conquistador blood.
	And the tinier Mexicans or Nicaraguans or whatever, Central Americans are known as Mayans, right?
	And they're seen as the more ethnically aboriginal group.
	And these guys say they want Mexico back.
	They want to own it.
	They want free money and free stuff.
	And they live in the jungle.
	I get the feeling that the Mexican government's kind of giving up on them.
	Like, all right, just stay up there.
	I don't really, I can't survive in there anyway.
	There's too many bugs and it's too hot.
	But yeah, you can be a revolutionary over there.
	But who loves EZLN?
	The Zapatistas, of course, Rage Against the Machine.
	There's our favorite wigger, Tom Morello.
	Grew up in the whitest imaginable environment, kayaking every day, going to Harvard.
	And now he hates fucking white people and corporations like Sony, who puts out rage against the machine.
	Fucking joke.
	And then the funny thing, too, about Zach is if he's Hispanic, he's clearly mostly conquistador.
	And here he is pretending that he bonds with the local Aboriginal midgets.
	No, you don't, you fucking poser.
	So, where the first group, the ones accused of white nationalism, are all extinct or in jail, these groups are all sanctioned by celebrities.
	Get the shirt.
	And then we have the last group of brown nationalists.
	These people are probably the most mainstream while simultaneously being the most extreme.
	They're called la raza, the race.
	And when they say the race in Spanish, they obviously mean the Hispanic race.
	Can you imagine a political mainstream group with Hillary Clinton talking at the podium called the White Race?
	That is exactly what their name means.
	The National Council of Racially Hispanic Peoples.
	Anyway, they want a socialist revolution.
	They want to kill us.
	Their founder made it very clear that the gringo has to go.
	So I guess we don't necessarily have to die.
	We could go back in boats to Europe, but we are in the way of them.
	What's the first link there?
	One of them said, a Los Angeles history teacher that's a member of Lodaza, he said, there's 40 million potential revolutionaries north of the border inside the belly of the beast.
	He's talking about saying that from Mexico and saying in here in America, we have 40 million Hispanics that could overthrow the government.
	And then we have, of course, the founder, Jose Angel Guitars, who makes it very clean that we need to, makes it very plain, we need to kill the gringo.
	That's the second link, Ryan.
	I always thought, up until today, I was like, brown and black people are considered cool because they're considered depressed.
	White people are uncool because they're in power.
	So when the latter group forms a group, it's too dangerous they could become Nazis.
	And when the first two groups form a group, it's kind of cool.
	That's not the case.
	It's not as racially based as we thought.
	Race may not be a factor at all.
	What if the Proud Boys were socialists?
	Well, here we go.
	Here's the founder.
	Here's the me of Proud Boys, but Laraza.
	Integrating into the society and to uplifting ourselves.
	Wait, go back to the beginning, Evan.
	He says, back to text.
	Who gets in the way of them assimilating?
	Me.
	We recognize that the barriers to our integrating into the society and to uplifting ourselves is the gringo.
	The gringo who's put the barriers, who makes us drop out of school, who keeps us in bad health, who doesn't pay us good wages, who prohibits our unions, and so on and so on and so on.
	So until we get rid of those elements, we're not going to progress.
	We're not going to be free.
	So yes, the gringo must go.
	An Anglo group called the...
	The gringo, that was kind of hard to hear, but he said the gringo is the one stopping us from assimilating.
	The gringo is the one stopping us from prospering.
	The gringo has to go.
	From America, not Mexico.
	And of course, not only are they loved by celebrities, they've got their own awards show, the Alma Awards.
	Look at that.
	I like how their most popular celebrities are the ones that look the most Caucasian.
	By the way, I would kill all of my children on Christmas Day in front of my wife if I could eat the ass of any of these women.
	They are all 10.1s.
	Wait, you're zooming in a little close there, dude.
	Jessica Ashley Tisdale.
	Look at that strong, proud Hispanic woman.
	Proudly Mayan.
	La Raza.
	Paula Abdul's Jewish.
	Maybe it's Tisdale.
	Tis Dale.
	Ashley Tisdale.
	Ashley Tisdale.
	Sina Gomez.
	Paula Abdul, the Jewish woman, who I guess her mom fucked a Mexican.
	America Ferreira.
	Okay, I'll give you that.
	Sophie Verghera, Smoke Show.
	Smoke Show, Smirnoff.
	How Hispanic of you.
	And not only are they endorsed by celebrities and they've got their own awards show, they're in the fucking Supreme Court.
	Sonia Sotomayor is a member of La Raza.
	And she proudly announces that she brings a Hispanic female opinion to the court.
	In other words, I'm not a good judge.
	And La Raza, by the way, so we have a Supreme Court judge in La Raza.
	La Raza is the one that said we have to give illegal aliens driver's licenses in New York, which happened.
	They won.
	They got that.
	She once said, I would hope that a wise Latina woman with the richness of her experience would more often than not reach a better conclusion than a white male who hasn't lead a life.
	And then she said, say hello to my little friend and pulled out an engorged clitoris.
	She's a hermaphrodite.
	No, that sounds like I'm saying the initial quote was a lie.
	That first part was true.
	She would hope her experience would more often than not reach a better conclusion than a white male who haven't lived that life, hasn't lived that life.
	All endorsed by celebrities, not in jail, considered awesome.
	Why?
	Because they are Marxist.
	We're living in the tyranny of the faux oppressed.
	Which brings us, of course, to black nationalists.
	As I said earlier, a very strange combination.
	I get black nationalism.
	Or even like, I understand races that don't like other races.
	It's not my cup of tea, but I totally understand it.
	I'm not saying they should have killed it, but I understand.
	What I don't get is how black nationalists can take all of their culture, all the things they love and adore, and then loosely glue it to a communist mentality.
	Doesn't jibe.
	Communism is really about over-academia.
	It's like overeducated people working themselves to death.
	It's sad.
	It's masochism, really.
	It's a form of masochism where you want to die.
	Really is.
	If you're a socialist, I don't think they're unaware of where it's headed, and they don't care.
	They are suicidal.
	They're lemmings walking off the cliff.
	Anyway, we'll start, of course, with the most obvious, just like we started with Shea and Fidel with the Browns.
	The Blacks, of course, get Black Lives Matter.
	I think Candace Owens is doing some great work with Patrice Cullers, calling her out for her $6 million mansion.
	Patrice Colors admits she lied when she denied using the group's property only for official business.
	It's okay, Patrice.
	Not one person in the world thought that mansion you bought that you live in with swimming pools and game rooms was somehow an official headquarters that you happened to just crash at.
	We know it's your home.
	We know it's the party hut.
	We know BLM is a joke.
	And what did this woman say?
	What did both the lesbians who started this movement say?
	What is that?
	Is that a uterus or some shit?
	Or a crucified skin head?
	It's a crucified woman, maybe?
	Anyway, it's gross.
	They said, we are trained Marxists.
	They tried to scrub it from the internet after they realized that we think Marxism is bad.
	It's not a good look for you, my dear.
	Trained Marxists, they both said.
	The only one who's not a disgruntled lesbian who was abandoned by her dad, and by the way, Marxism is steeped in daddy issues.
	Karl Marx himself felt like a shitbag loser because his dad was a bootstraps millionaire who built a fortune from nothing, hence the term bootstraps.
	And Karl Marx was just a rich kid academic who never lived, never experienced, had no grit, never got in a fight.
	So what did he do?
	He sat and wrote about how the working man, a person he had never met and never did meet, needs to overthrow the evil CEO, the corporate overlord, his daddy.
	So what better person to take up the arms of the daddy issues movement than two lesbians who were totally abandoned by their father because they were gay?
	She makes a good argument that you're born Hindu.
	It's not a choice.
	Well, the dot is in the center if you're married.
	If it's off to the left, it means that you're in a serious relationship, but there's no ring on it quite yet.
	And then for me to list the celebrities to endorse Black Lives Matter, I mean, we could be here for three weeks.
	How about the stormtrooper from Star Wars?
	Look at him.
	He said, remember he said, I could lose my job for this.
	John Voyega speaking out in support of racial calm down.
	The actor got an impassioned speech.
	Yeah, you're never going to work again supporting BLM.
	Why, you'll be relegated to the outskirts of society with Nike, fucking Burger King, McDonald's, Levi's.
	I don't know if I'm going to have a career after this.
	Today is about innocent people who were halfway through their process.
	We don't know what George Floyd could have achieved.
	We don't know what Sancho.
	I have a pretty good idea.
	Why is your shirt a backpack?
	Today, we're going to make sure that that won't be an alien thought to our young ones.
	Boyega has received tons of support on social media.
	Yeah, I would imagine.
	In fact, Star Wars, the writers proudly said that Darth Vader and everything was white supremacy.
	So you made a movie about how everyone is racist and it has to be stopped.
	And you're saying, I made an anti-racist comment.
	Am I going to be ostracized?
	No, fuckface.
	You're going to get a raise.
	Ew, look at this.
	Never been more proud of you.
	Love dad.
	Ew.
	That's not even true of the movie.
	And then I thought I would throw in the not fucking around coalition.
	They're one of the only groups you listed here where the guy did go to jail.
	But I think he's out now.
	It was a very short stint.
	And what did he do to go to jail?
	He took his fucking, what is it, an assault rifle, AR-15?
	He took his AR-15 and pointed it in a cop's face and lived, by the way.
	He was not immediately shot for that.
	He was charged with, I don't know, menacing.
	That's what you have to do to get arrested if you're in a Marxist group.
	These guys are not very overtly political, so it's hard to, if you look them up on Wikipedia, socialism is listed as their political belief, but they mostly talk about how they need money, just like EZLN and FSLN.
	They need money from the government, and they need land.
	They want large swaths of Texas to build a black homeland.
	How about you just build a black homeland?
	Like, take over an area.
	The Hasidic Jews got Curious Joel in upstate New York.
	Can't you have your own Curious Joel?
	Why do I have to get involved in your endeavors?
	Why are your dreams my problem?
	That'd be a good segment for this show, title for this show.
	Why are your dreams my problem?
	They were very mad about Breonna Terror.
	They're in Louisville, Kentucky, so they're always storming things.
	They stormed the Kentucky Derby recently.
	Stop racing them horses until every black man is free, every political prisoner.
	I can't have a horse race.
	Can we free them tomorrow?
	So that's socialist.
	If you want money from the government and you want free land from the government, I don't care how capitalist you say you are.
	You're clearly a socialist.
	There he is, Grandmaster Jay.
	He's the leader of the group.
	He is getting on.
	He's pointing a gun at a cop.
	All right.
	And then finally, we have the Black Panthers.
	Now, there's two Black Panthers, right?
	There's the ones in the 60s and the ones now.
	I don't really mind the ones in the 60s.
	I think they were.
	There's a great book by a complete asshole named Ward Churchill called The Agents of Repression.
	And although he's a fuckhead, he does document pretty well the war that the FBI declared, and the CIA, sorry, on the Black Panthers.
	They were originally a pretty decent group.
	That's a great book.
	And, you know, you had the free breakfast programs, and they weren't wantonly murdering everyone.
	And there was racism in the 60s.
	Okay?
	So anyway, the original Black Panthers, though, wait a minute.
	Didn't they shoot cops?
	What am I talking about?
	I think they did, yeah.
	Yeah.
	Here's the problem.
	Compared to the new Black Panther party, the Black Panthers seem awesome, but they were not awesome.
	I take that back.
	We had Tupac Shakira's mother killed a cop, right?
	And she escaped to Cuba.
	No charges.
	So yeah, fuck the Black Panthers.
	Change that.
	Scratch.
	Record scratch.
	But the new Black Panthers proudly kill cops, like the ones in Dallas, remember?
	That's new Black Panthers are the same, but with way more murder.
	They're responsible for the cops that were shot in Dallas.
	That was a member.
	Very little media coverage of that.
	Look at that.
	We've got some local news piece.
	Dallas shooting suspect was leader in black nationalist group.
	Can the New York Times cover this, please?
	Can the Washington Post get involved?
	Can the Daily Beast jump on this scoop?
	Is that the New York Times?
	This is MSN news, probably from New York Times.
	But ex-Black Panther.
	So this is the OG, one of the OGs, New Jersey cop killer to be freed.
	I'm surprised MSN can say cop killer.
	Anyway, they were very socialist since day one.
	So let's go back to the Black Panther Party.
	Here they are in Socialist Alternative.
	Working class, this is Bobby Seale from the Black Panther Party.
	This is the old one in the 60s.
	Working class people of all colors must unite against the exploitative, oppressive ruling class.
	Let me emphasize again, we believe our fight is a class struggle, not a race struggle.
	Bobby, that's kind of the purpose of this whole video.
	This whole green screen is saying exactly what you just said.
	This is about Marxism more than it's about race.
	Then we had Angela Davis to the Black Panthers, proudly promoting not just socialism, but communism.
	Why is Angela Davis communist?
	This is a very hard question to answer, mainly because I don't feel I've been taught the true meaning of communist.
	Imagine growing your hair out and thinking that's some sort of revolutionary gesture.
	Hold it right there.
	Motley Crue grew their hair out.
	Actually, I think I answered that.
	I can't hear her.
	She was talking about what a revolutionary is.
	Many times the term communist because I think it's been used by so many different aspects of our society to put down rather than to let people try to understand.
	You know, everybody shines away from it.
	It's like it's a disease or something like that.
	Why is communism treated like a disease?
	It's only killed 100 million people.
	And then you have the new ones, new Black Panther Party.
	And as I said, they're behind the shooting of cops in Dallas.
	They're considered cool.
	And Samuel Jackson supports both.
	I mean, there's a bit of a gray area between the old Black Panthers and the new Black Panthers.
	Samuel Jackson really wanted to be in the Black Panther movie.
	We're not sure if he was a Black Panther.
	He denies it, but plenty of evidence shows that he was an actual member of the Black Panthers.
	I think he dated or married some woman that was in the Black Panthers, but he desperately wanted to be in that movie.
	He wasn't invited for some strange reason.
	Not that I give a fuck.
	And as far as the celebrity endorsements, it's just as much as BLM.
	Again, these guys stormed the fucking Capitol exactly like the quote-unquote insurrectionists.
	And everyone wants to be like them.
	And then, of course, the Black Panthers, it's a fucking superhero.
	Imagine a superhero called the Proud Boy.
	Proud Boy.
	There he is racing through the fucking...
	I think that was Singapore or no, no.
	Was it Hong Kong?
	This chase scene?
	And I'll tell you something.
	A proud boy would be a superhero in a Marvel movie if proud boys demanded reparations, if they demanded free land for various oppressed groups, if they demanded the governments of Mexico and Nicaragua and El Salvador give everything to the locals,
	to the farmers, to the poor, and they just sort of invert the country's economic system, as we saw in Cuba.
	So if a proud boy wanted to drain the bank accounts of every wealthy American and give it to every poor, oppressed American, if they wanted the same to happen to all of Central America that happened to Cuba, if they called everyone racist and said we need to push Marxism in schools,
	there would absolutely be a superhero named Proud Boy because that's what the Marxist media demands.
	So we're being fed a pile of shit here, folks.
	The narrative is that black and brown revolutionaries are cool because they're oppressed and revolutionaries who don't appear as black or brown are Nazis that want to start World War III.
	That is obviously a lie and the truth behind it is the former groups are Marxist and the latter group is anti-Marxist.
	It's just that simple.
	Mao.
	Mao killed 80 million people.
	I saw a Chinese guy in Niagara Falls, a tourist.
	No, sorry.
	It was a white guy.
	Or was it a Chinese guy?
	I can't remember.
	An old dude.
	And he had a tote bag that had Mao's face on it.
	That is more than 10 times more obscene than someone with a Hitler tote bag.
	That's a bad sign.
	You know, I really think we waste too much time talking to Islam.
	I don't think it's a waste in Britain.
	I think Tommy's found the right target, and that is the massive radical invasion of pedophile Pakistanis.
	But here, they're only 1% of the population.
	Now, the tactics that the radical left are using are very radical jihadist.
	And they're both insatiable.
	You know, you put on a burqa, and the next thing you know, the jihadist says, no, I can still see some of your bangs, and you're wearing purple socks.
	Just like the radical left, it's never good enough for them.
	You apologize?
	You're never forgiven.
	Uh, okay.
	That swallowed up most of the show here, folks.
	I got a few dumb things, though, I wanted to talk about.
	Okay, can I just tell you this amazing invention I came up with?
	Yes.
	Ready for the coolest thing in the world?
	Yeah.
	Now, initially, I thought this would be one giant TV with like one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, three, six.
	Yeah, maybe eight TVs, little TVs surrounding the big TV in the middle.
	But I was talking to a TV guy, and he said to me, now we're at the point with these LED screens where you can have like a 10-foot by five-foot screen, and you can break that into anything you want.
	That could be a thousand mini TVs or one TV with a bunch of TVs on the side.
	So the whole like buying several screens, like I have four behind me here, you're not going to have to do that anymore.
	So don't really worry about the TVs themselves.
	But I imagine one big one in the middle, right?
	And then bonk, bonk, bonk, bonk, bonk all around it.
	Okay?
	It's going to be a new way to watch a movie.
	I'm so excited about this.
	And by the way, I don't have time to do this.
	So this is a free idea.
	Maybe I shouldn't have said that.
	Did I just lose $10 billion?
	I tend to do that.
	I tend to say things that cost me hundreds of millions of dollars.
	You have zero profits.
	You're not going to make any money off of this in perpetuity.
	So for that reason, I'm out.
	Good luck.
	We should do a shark tank.
	That'd be fucking awesome.
	Yeah.
	Well, I've had enough inventions.
	Wait a minute.
	We could do that.
	Yeah.
	We'll just take the footage of their various reactions and we'll make my inventions real.
	Didn't we try that once?
	Oh, no, it was the helmet with lights.
	Oh, yeah, lights.
	And you couldn't tell if I was saying lights or lice.
	Yeah.
	But that problem with that is you have to have them say lights and lice.
	But now you could just bank a bunch of reactions.
	We're inventing something mid-invention.
	White people, huh?
	What will they think of next?
	Literally.
	And me.
	What are you anyway?
	I don't know.
	So you got the initial concept, right?
	Now, here's the thing.
	It's a movie or even a show.
	In the center is the action, right?
	So it's an episode of The Sopranos.
	Surrounding it is the various people in the episode on the same timeline doing their various shit.
	So when Tony sees his mistress, right, at 4 p.m., she leaves this screen, answers the door.
	Tony's there.
	Now, womph.
	That's the main screen.
	And I'm not really sure what replaces it, but we'll figure that out later.
	So while we were waiting for the mistress to show up and fuck Tony or talk to Tony or whatever, she was over here in the corner, just watching TV and making chicken.
	Like Big Brother.
	You know how Big Brother, you just watch people living their lives?
	Yeah.
	Maybe she's napping.
	Like the SWAT team kicks on the door and wakes up Roger Stone at five in the morning.
	While we're watching the SWAT team get ready, Roger Stone is up here in the corner sleeping with his wife.
	Oh, I see.
	And then this door is kicked in.
	Boom, it's the main thing.
	And when it converges, that's what the product would be.
	Right.
	It's sort of like a soap opera, right?
	Where they keep cutting back to the other things, but the thing is happening up here.
	Now, obviously, you can't have important dialogue happening up here.
	While you're showing these other people, they can't be like plotting to kill the president.
	That's too important.
	So that hits, if something like that happens, it goes back to the main screen.
	So say Syl and Christopher were plotting to kill the president, right?
	He drives there, they meet, boom, that's the main screen.
	Now, Tony, who was the main screen, is now like going to get a BLT.
	Right.
	Continuing whatever the hell he has to do.
	So when Tony's not doing important shit, and obviously you have to mess with the time, right?
	A show is an hour and a half, a movie is three hours.
	You're condensing three days into that.
	So they're all little mini movies.
	But every time they do something important, it's in the mainstream.
	And every time it's not important, it's just like Christopher and Drea DeMateo watching a movie right here.
	Isn't that brilliant?
	Yeah, you could see people talking about it the next day too.
	Be like, did you see, though, in the top corner?
	Hide her cam.
	Before she went to Tony, she was talking to fucking Baba Black because he was on the phone at the same time.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
	You see the mistress open the door and she's talking to someone and you ignore the big screen for a second.
	You're like, what the fuck's going on up here?
	And then the guy hands her an envelope and she puts it in her jacket and then she goes, or her jacket.
	She puts it in her purse.
	And then she goes back to watching a show and you're like, wait a minute.
	Hey, Tone.
	It's almost like a choose your own adventure.
	That might be the evolution of the concept, too.
	Maybe you can start choosing futures.
	I'm not sure about that.
	But you're jokingly saying the TV, hey, Tony, she just took an envelope.
	That might be a Fed.
	She might be a rat.
	She might be recording you, dude.
	I'm telling you, or she's fucking murderer.
	Yeah, or there's like an FBI screen.
	You can see what the feds are doing.
	And then the chick that just hangs up with Tony, she picks up the phone after talking to them.
	And then the FBI guys pick up and they start writing shit down.
	You're like, did that bitch just fuck up?
	Or you know what you could do?
	You have some major thing.
	So Tony's being bugged, right?
	And you're watching the FBI in the van in the bottom right corner.
	And he says, look, it's a very difficult situation.
	We're going to have to kill Drea de Mateo.
	While he says, we're going to have to kill Dre de Mateo, coincidentally, you see the guy who's recording.
	He's like, and you see, oh, fuck, he missed it.
	Oh, he missed it.
	He was smoking a cigarette and laughing with his friend.
	And then when Tony's done his confession, he happens to put his earphones back on and he's back to listening like this.
	And you're going, oh, fuck.
	Tony's not going to get caught for that.
	That's pretty good.
	That is good.
	Yeah.
	But it would be a different show.
	Well, it's a lot of work, too, because you finished the show and now you've got to go and show the Mistress's Day show.
	Oh, there's going to be a lot of people sleeping too.
	Like if Tony is going to do something at two in the morning, all these screens are black.
	Everyone's asleep.
	You're looking at his wife asleep, his mistress sleep, Syl's asleep, Christopher's asleep.
	But that adds to the concept, too.
	It makes it more night.
	Maybe there's a fast forward thing instead of like the time skipping thing, you'll see just like some people fast forward in order to get all the timelines correct.
	Like if you, in the show, sometimes they'll go from like, it's 2 p.m.
	Oh, I at least.
	I hereby kick you out of my idea.
	Fired from my invention.
	I'm already out.
	I said, you're not going to make profits in perfect duty.
	I'm out.
	No, I'm out.
	I kicked myself out of the gang.
	It's like in Bottle Rocket.
	No.
	He goes, you're out of the gang.
	You're out of the gang.
	Hell, I think I'm out of the gang.
	You know what I am?
	What?
	Oh, I'm sorry.
	I'm gay and retarded.
	Oh, that's a lot of fun.
	I got one more.
	This one's so funny.
	Yummy, I'm gay.
	Holy shit.
	All right.
	One brief thing before we get to the letters page.
	No one ever talks about this.
	The media never covers it.
	No one does.
	Questlov's ass is hilarious.
	It looks like he fucked a hippopotamus fucked him and fell in.
	He's got a perfectly reasonable body from the top of his ribs, bottom of his ribs to his head.
	And then from his knees down, pretty fine, pretty reasonable.
	Everything's okay.
	You're a normal guy.
	His ass is these TVs.
	It looks ridiculous.
	I've met him a few times, hung out with him before, and I'm not a fan.
	And when I first saw his ass from behind, I was like, what is that?
	I said it to a friend of mine too.
	I go, that doesn't look natural.
	And then he thought I was talking about race.
	And he goes, yeah, I don't really see, you can't really picture that like running from a tiger in Africa at some point.
	You know what I mean?
	Like the roots of it don't make sense.
	I don't know what the fuck he was talking about, but it does seem like a genetic mutation.
	Now, this is to talk about Chris Rock's face because it was right after he got slapped.
	Fuck Chris Rock.
	We're done talking about the slap.
	We're talking about the slapping cheeks here.
	The clap.
	The clap.
	The clap that heard round the world.
	Did you know he left the band The Roots to join the band The Glutes?
	This is what happens after.
	He's a whatever.
	Chris is still like in shock.
	Watch, chop.
	Okay, go back a frame.
	Like, it doesn't look so bad from the front.
	He looks like fucking Haggard from Harry Potter.
	He looks like snuffle.
	He looks like the guy who's in the snuffleuffagus company.
	He took the top coffee.
	He's having a cigarette during a lunch break.
	He's about to get Vinned by Vin Diesel.
	And he still has the bottom snuffleuffagus on.
	Look at that thing.
	Wow.
	What the?
	It's like when you see a black woman's ass and you're like, that has to be fake.
	Well, apparently not, because here's her son.
	See, the front looks cool.
	The jacket hides everything.
	He's just like, I'm a hip-hop legend.
	Go back.
	I have to see his ass again.
	Oh, of course.
	I need some of that black ass.
	Look at this thing.
	One.
	Can stop.
	What?
	You can see his waist to his shoulders.
	No one has a problem with that.
	Dad bod, Normie bod.
	His ass is insane.
	I went to a party once and he complained to the people who did the party that someone tried to rape him.
	No, his girlfriend.
	I was like, that sounds really bad.
	And they're, of course, freaking the fuck out.
	You know what it was?
	Two of the couple there were drunk and they worked at a pharmacy or something.
	So they had all kinds of pills, Xanax and whatever.
	And they were doing them in the bathroom, I guess.
	And the girl, the guy was in there there making out.
	And the girl goes, do you want to try one of our pills?
	Do you want a little Zan bar?
	A little bit of Zani?
	So the woman there interpreted that as, they wanted me to have a threesome.
	And then that became she was sexually assaulted.
	Jesus.
	Obviously, Questlove, if a woman is dating you, she's mentally ill.
	Like that ass.
	Imagine that ass just in normal underwear, like getting up to go to the shower.
	You'd be like, what happened to my life?
	There he is.
	I'd like to thank God, first and foremost and all the people I had to step on to get here.
	LOL, just kidding.
	Oh, he's on Minnie Me's shoulders?
	Yes.
	That's back when Mike Myers could be funny before he became Rex Smith.
	All right, let's fucking get on that Mail B. Enough chattering.
	True.
	Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dad.
	Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag.
	Let me touch it.
	I know I was told to shut up, a la, the beginning of that song.
	But so this came from the Reddit, the subreddit.
	This was shut down for a couple of months because the moderator got banned or something like that.
	Yeah, that sounds familiar.
	And now it's active again.
	But I was wondering, I was like, what the hell happened?
	I would go there every now and then to see people's reactions to things or see some of that.
	Actually, one of the links I had has a censored Reddit link on it that I got off the Facebook.
	But I can't be finding it right now.
	Oh, yeah.
	We have a Facebook group too.
	For sure.
	He's gone.
	He's gone from my files.
	He's no good.
	All right, let's get down to only the purple flags, Harry guy.
	Greatest picture of all time.
	Now, you see this subhead, I mean, you see this subject heading, and you go, This is going to suck.
	This is like when guys tell me, I finally found a girl with the sprinkles or something.
	And you watch super corny Instagram comedy of some chick with fake stubble, and you go, I'm not reading this on the air.
	You suck.
	This is the greatest picture of all time.
	That's a yes.
	This is real.
	I mean, it's like when my dad listens to Blue by You by Linda Ronstadt, and he goes, why continue?
	Perfection has been achieved.
	Why write another song?
	I kind of feel like I look at this picture and I go, I can die now.
	My work is done here.
	Clown World has been summarized perfectly.
	Wow.
	Look at that.
	I feel like I could just look at it for hours.
	Like, shouldn't this be in the Smithsonian or the Metropolitan Museum of Art?
	Now, this is one of those rare examples where the sequel surpasses the original.
	Yeah.
	It's possible.
	Yeah, this is Terminator 2.
	Yes, yes.
	And yeah, that previous picture was my favorite picture of all time.
	It was definitely my favorite meme because the description was amazing below it.
	Amazon.
	Amazen.
	He out.
	Wow.
	Now he's become a woman.
	Now I do believe in gender transitioning.
	Look at one person's mentally ill and the other person's mentally gone.
	Too shit for brains.
	I know what it's like to disappear from the man you used to be, man.
	Come on.
	You got to get out there.
	You've got to find the right guy for you.
	Get pregnant.
	I thought Harpy fucks your penis to shreds.
	I thought I had hairy legs, man.
	I mean, you're a guy.
	You need to get pregnant in your ass.
	I don't know how you do it, but I trust that you'll figure out a way because you're that kind of woman.
	Here's my son's number, man.
	Wells are very common once you leave the city in suburban hell.
	Wells are the only way to get water.
	You've obviously never lived outside the suburbs.
	How's your hemorrhoids?
	I think we did use a well.
	I definitely had a well when I lived in Costa Rica, but about 15% of the American population uses well.
	So I was being hyperbolic when I said nobody has a well.
	But it's amazing how much controversy that cutlery statement issued.
	Look, how many times have you looked in the sink and went, oh shit, my cutlery's rusty?
	It never happens.
	That was my point.
	Not that it's completely impossible.
	Yeah.
	We live in a matriarchy, this is called matriarchy, where women are practically begging men to get up off the couch and take charge.
	All the screaming, nagging, bickering, and disrespectful behavior displayed by modern women in the macro is also what you see in any household with a lazy beta husband.
	The wife doesn't want to be in charge.
	She's miserable and doesn't know why.
	She just knows it's his fault and needs to be punished for his weakness.
	Yes, I would agree with that, and you see that in rap.
	You see all these feminists who get mad when men mansplain or man spread, yet they're singing songs like, fuck a bitch, she's a stupid hoe, wiggle that ass, wiggle, wiggle that ass, bitch.
	I'm going to come on your face and get you pregnant and then abandon you for the rest of your life, motherfucking rest of your life.
	Pooh, poo, pop a cap in your ass, you fucking hoe.
	You're a bitch, suck my dick.
	I fucking love it.
	Yeah, big titties, big titties.
	I love the big titties.
	Fucking bitches bow down.
	Bitches, bitches bow down.
	Okay.
	Damn.
	Believe it or not, that was not a song I was quoting.
	Oh.
	But you're seeing these like woke feminists dance to that shit and you go, oh, you're faking.
	Add another to the body count.
	This one says.
	Bill Clinton's special advisor and Jeffrey Epstein Handler, who flew on Lolita Express, mysteriously dies at 59.
	Add another corpse to the pile.
	I was thinking maybe he wouldn't look so healthy, but no, that's a strapping man.
	We have another Volucia County has been invaded with midget Nazis.
	Please help us locate author of graffiti scrawled on area home on Ormond Beach.
	Resident awoke Wednesday to find his garage door vandalized with the words, get out and an apparent swastika spray paint on his garage.
	Oh my God.
	Look, can you show the fucking picture at some point, shit show?
	Yes.
	It's a little more important than the thing I'm actually reading.
	Hello?
	It's loading.
	Look at that.
	Zoom out.
	That's not that short, dude.
	Three panels?
	That's pretty reasonable.
	How is that spelled?
	Is that Gwit out?
	No, it's an E that goes like this.
	It's a backwards 3E.
	Wow, that butchered the swasti.
	Yeah, look, if there's one thing Nazis know, it's what a swastika looks like.
	And it looks like an S. You start your, if you guys are out there committing hate crimes, let me remind you, you go, make an S first.
	And then you make another S that's lying face down.
	So you got your first S wrong because you don't usually do swastikas because you're not a Nazi, because like all these hate crimes, it's a fucking lie.
	Reuters head of data science fired for doing data science.
	This is Zach Kriegman.
	He criticized BLM.
	The data about police shootings just didn't add up, but no one at Thompson Reuters wanted to hear it.
	So we've seen this happen a few times.
	These guys go into the data looking at innocent black people who are just minding their own business, pegged off by cops who are shooting them down like they're at the county fair, shooting ducks in a competitive water game.
	And they discover, oh, shit, it's like six mysterious cases a year, not 800.
	All the other ones were someone who was not asking for it, but had put themselves in a dangerous situation.
	And the reason that they get pulled over more on traffic stops is because they appear more in traffic crime.
	Fuck.
	And so what they do when they find that information is either hide it or make it public and get fired.
	What did Eric Holder do?
	He hid it.
	He said, Obama, check out the stats.
	It looks pretty bad for us.
	And Obama said, Okay, well, then bury it.
	And from that day forward, you were not allowed to have race in crime statistics.
	This guy made the mistake of saying, cops aren't hunting blacks.
	Well, that is politically incorrect.
	Remember, the origin of the term politically incorrect is Soviet.
	And it comes from the KGB, the authorities, the administration saying, yes, what you're saying is factually correct, but it is not politically correct.
	And they would always, of course, go with the latter.
	So this guy learned what was factually correct and what was politically incorrect.
	Speaking of politically incorrect, do you see that Italy announced that you can now openly say the N-word?
	Great.
	So they have some woman took some liberty.
	So she's really enjoying.
	God, it must be fun to be able to say that word.
	She really was leaning into it.
	You can tell why people have always wanted to say that word by the way they act when they're finally allowed to.
	They literally sing it from the rooftops.
	It was a beautiful crescendo.
	And you can also see why they want to ban it because it sounds so beautiful when they say it.
	Not going to lie.
	It's not a joke.
	By the way, speaking of not a joke, I kept getting these people talking about my heart problem.
	I don't have a heart problem.
	I was joking about knocking Maddie off the waiting list.
	I said that I offered the doctor, I gave the doctor $100,000 and he removed Maddie from a heart transplant waiting list.
	Was that not clear enough?
	I think people watched the Thursday show drunk.
	Also, people accused me of being drunk last night.
	I'd had like two beers.
	I don't think you were drunk.
	I know.
	I remember every facet of last night's show.
	Speaking of ethnomasochist cucks who worship the ground blacks walk on, I wouldn't call him a friend of mine, but I've hung out with this dude a few times.
	He's a cool dude, but he's not culturally relevant.
	He's a performer like maybe a hundredth as influential and important to the history of music as Justin Bieber, who I don't think deserves his own day.
	But Ghostface Killa.
	LMFAO.
	Ghostface Killer Killa has received his own day in New York City.
	Of course, Eric Adams is here to fight racism and make Ghostface Kill a day.
	What the fuck?
	What kind of retardation is this?
	Tearing down our statues and replacing them with the woo.
	Someone from the West Coast saying we should do a show in Orange County.
	Laguna Niguel and Dana Pointe are good.
	Why do I got to fly out to you?
	Are you in a wheelchair?
	You fly out to Orlando.
	Know what I'm saying?
	We got to make a sizzle reel, Ryan, of Kumia McInnes and Denny and all our controversy in the news.
	That flyer I made is kind of anticlimactic.
	I'm not nuts about it.
	I always like assign someone to do a graphic project and then I don't like what they did.
	So I take it over and then I make something 11 times shittier.
	Like with my tattoos.
	I can't tell you how many times I've been like, no, no, no, I'll handle this.
	Like the bird which is the bald eagle.
	She wanted to do a shine on the bald head.
	I was like, it doesn't need a shine.
	It's obvious he's bald.
	And then I look at it and no, it looks like his feathers are slicked back.
	I fucked it up.
	Okay, let's end with this video.
	It's kind of a great final video, but it's not really.
	It's too long.
	So it'll be in the mailbag.
	Great final video material.
	It's basically an onion news video.
	And off the top tonight, a Kalamazoo County man used a weapon to fend off a convicted criminal who kicked the door into his apartment late last night.
	But it wasn't a gun, knife, or even a bat that kept the intruder at bay.
	Instead, it was a replica battle axe.
	Martin Dieters is in studio control with this story all new tonight, Barton.
	Brian and Marley, the 33-year-old suspect, is in jail now, facing a charge of first-degree home invasion, which could put him in prison for a maximum of 20 years.
	Whatever his reason was.
	I was such a nerd in high school.
	Who's a nerd now, mother?
	Talk about axes and stuff.
	I'm on TV covering nerds.
	I'm the head nerd correspondent at new tonight.
	This on the weekends.
	Well, number one, it's not LARPing.
	Stop.
	How is that not LARPing?
	Are you really a Viking warrior?
	I think because the swords are actually steel and not foam, they consider themselves actual Vikings.
	This is not role-playing.
	Yeah, it is.
	You're just LARPing with slightly more dangerous weapons than the usual foam swords.
	And look, they still have a mat that they carefully lie out on the place where they're going to fall.
	So not exactly dangerous.
	There are dudes in Germany who have real sword fights and cut their fucking legs open to the tune of like 50 stitches.
	But this isn't that.
	And those guys are lame too, by the way.
	People are like, oh, is it LARPing?
	And it's like, no.
	This Band-Aid was actually from filming last night for our newest episode.
	When he's not working at Applebee's, 36-year-old Ben Ball competes in the event.
	Look at this fight.
	People compete against each other.
	Ow!
	And fall down onto the mat where you belong, soldier.
	Combat.
	Off your feet, soldier.
	There's a lot of period weaponry reminiscent of the kind used by fighting.
	That he keeps around his apartment.
	Look how cool he is.
	The new nerd post-high school.
	He's like king of the shitheads.
	Carbon steel battle axe that was homemade by a gentleman who has since passed.
	That's what I call my baby.
	Ball says that the suspect dated a former roommate who left to get away.
	And he showed Up at the apartment around 11:30 p.m.
	Wednesday, the suspect knocked on the door repeatedly.
	How weird is that?
	He dated the perp dated a former roommate who left to get away.
	What does that mean?
	She left it, she left when the guy showed up, or she just needed to get away from this nerd in the stupid Inca hat.
	She left to get away.
	Doesn't everyone leave to get away?
	Isn't that what leaving is?
	In his apartment playing video games and watching Rick and Morty, then the suspect was.
	Yeah, go back, go back.
	That's such a great line.
	Goed up at the apartment around 11:30 p.m.
	Wednesday.
	The suspect knocked on the door repeatedly as Ball was in his apartment playing video games and watching Rick and Morty.
	Then how perfect can you get?
	That's even as perfect as that picture of Joe Biden.
	That's today's special, The Perfect Show.
	And the suspect kicks at the door.
	Good sequel to yesterday's shit show.
	Correct.
	Correct.
	It might have broken in on twice, but it may have been the third.
	But I was reaching already over here.
	And this is what Ball pulled out, a sharpened battle axe.
	Door open, grab the axe.
	Step, step.
	Hit.
	Ball said he.
	That's reasonable.
	That's my favorite book, Star Wars.
	The suspect had a firearm.
	The axe hit the intruder at least once in the torso.
	And then the two started grappling in the apartment, destroying the place.
	There's a bloody mess everywhere.
	Finally, the suspect gave up and made a run for it.
	A neighbor called 911, and police showed up.
	Canines followed the trail of blood to apprehend the suspect.
	Bell identifies the suspect as Axel Lavelle Rawls, who's currently held in the Kalamazoo County Jail on a charge of first-degree home invasion.
	Court records show Rawls was discharged from the state.
	No corrections in Germany.
	We in America are capable of levels of trash formally assumed to be unimaginable.
	Like this is dregs.
	Does Germany have dregs of this level?
	Like both guys I'm talking about here.
	Fighting with battle axes, watching Rick and Morty with fucking Illuminati fish scale tattoos over their eyeballs?
	Like we really hit it out of the park with the bottom of the barrel here.
	Now Kalamzoo County says the suspect spent the night in the hospital with substantial wounds before being transferred to the jail.
	Under Sheriff Jim Van Dijken says avoiding confrontation with the nerd, dude.
	You're not calling.
	People have a right to defend themselves.
	Hey, king of the nerds, we see through your giant bifocals.
	All right, let's fucking hit the final vid.
	I will cross this body of water if you promise me you won't try this at home.
	I love Billy Bragg.
	Hate his politics.
	I remember Tony Buzzcock from the Buzzcocks once said to me, well, problem with Billy Bragg is I don't really need to get life advice from a man wearing women's jeans.
	He does seem to wear like big denim pants.
	His Levi's go up to his fucking gunt.
	It's not a good look.
	Don't try this at home.
	Don't try this at home.
	Don't try this at home, folks.
	This is number 4-3.
	And I know that you're going to watch this and go, what a fucking idiot, man.
	What a loser.
	That's so stupid.
	Well, it's only stupid if he loses.
	If you take a massive risk and you win, you're a winner.
	So don't try this at home.
	But these guys successfully pulled it off.
	So I'm sorry, but they're cool.
	They win.
	Wow.
	So have a good weekend, folks.
	Once again, we're here to show you the truth behind the web of lies, the tangled web that the media weaves.
	They tell you there's white nationalists around every corner.
	It's a complete and utter fabrication.
	Fabrication?
	But there are Marxists around every corner, and they are here to sabotage our culture.
	Don't let it happen.
	There's nothing to be ashamed of.
	We have never been more equal and fair than we are today.
	And we've always been the world leaders in equality and fairness, especially when we discuss the Western world as a whole.
	So if you want to get into our past, I guess we can take time out and say, you're welcome.
	If you have a problem with that, you can fuck off, even if you're my boss.
	So get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.

▲