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April 8, 2022 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

02:04:32

GOML LIVE #143 - THE DATING SHOW

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Time	Text
	Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McGuinness.
	This is Daryl Tron, a guy I met in Frederick, Maryland, doing karaoke at a dive bed.
	He's a funky guy like Prince.
	It's called Daryl Tran.
	Not a tranny thing, but he's named Daryl, but he's also futuristic and 80s.
	So like, I guess he should have done Daryl Tron.
	But he's a very, very funky guy.
	Did he play the bass?
	No.
	I think he mostly plays the keyboard.
	I don't think he plays the bass.
	But at this particular night at karaoke, he got up and he did James Brown.
	Perfect.
	Short little guy, mustache.
	Wears like those crumpled up black Reeboks that guys who hate Giuliani would wear in the 90s.
	Kind of baggy pants that don't fit him very well.
	But he got up and he did James Brown and just nailed it beautifully.
	Sex Machine?
	I think it was Sex Machine.
	So then everyone's like, yeah, that was good, blah, blah, blah.
	Then he stands near the mic because I think he intends to return.
	And this guy goes, that was really good.
	And then Daryl Tron, Tran, goes, thanks, can I sit here?
	And then the original guy goes, yeah.
	Now, I don't know if Daryl might be gay and he thought that he had a boyfriend here or maybe he's just very lonely and he thought he might have a friend.
	But there was something happening here.
	There was some potential for a relationship.
	And then the other guy gets up and he does some song like CCR and nails it too.
	And you realize, oh, these guys are like pool sharks.
	Like they're here to rock.
	So we have a bond here.
	We're both the best karaoke guys here.
	On the East Coast.
	On the entire East Coast.
	And then this fucking bitch, Yoko Ono, shows up and sits with the guy who said that was good.
	Now Daryl doesn't have a friend anymore.
	And his whole body language changed and he changed his chair like this.
	Now he's just watching the singers.
	Fuck you two.
	You dumped it.
	Wow.
	And if you check his Facebook, you see that he's a pretty sad guy.
	Can you scroll down?
	Happiness in music.
	Okay.
	Are you not on Facebook on that computer, Ryan?
	No.
	You should be.
	You got to be for work.
	But check out his other song that I sent you.
	It's much more sad.
	A lot of emotions in that second one.
	I saw one of his Facebook posts was, yesterday was a pretty tough day.
	Oh, Jesus.
	I'm not on Facebook, but do people type that?
	It's amazing.
	People will tell you every second of their life and then wonder why you know everything they do.
	They question it.
	Like, how do you know?
	It's crazy.
	It's insanity.
	Had diarrhea again on Thursday.
	Oh, yeah.
	They have no, they, no restrictions.
	Look how sad he is.
	I think Daryl needs a date.
	There he is headed home and it's what is that, a purple turtleneck?
	Yeah, it's very 80-ish.
	I've been listening to this CD in my new Jaguar.
	Because we have a CD player and a cassette player.
	Yeah, it's got that cool shit in the back where you can put in 16.
	Of 16.
	16.
	11!
	Good thing it wasn't 11.
	Anyway, that's my new obsession, Daryl Campbell.
	Can you show his video, his YouTube page?
	Stefan Scottish name.
	Campbell.
	Daryl Tron.
	Wait, is that Daryl Tron?
	It is Tron.
	Am I misreading that.
	Oh, it's just got such a fancy O that it resembles an A, but it is Daryl Tron.
	Okay, we're good now.
	We're back.
	I'm going to collab with him.
	You should.
	He does reggae.
	He does Mexican music.
	He's got a song about nachos.
	The guy's talent knows no bounds.
	All right, let's start the show.
	Welcome back to JoMl Live.
	Maddie O'Dell is back.
	What's up, everybody?
	Thank you for all the well wishes and kind words that you sent or posted about me.
	I appreciate it.
	His feet are just too purple.
	It looks like he's wearing fuzzy slippers, but it's his feet.
	It's kind of funky.
	And you've got your own shirt, your own baby monster shirt.
	I do.
	I do.
	I do.
	I love it.
	I can't wait to get the big, expanded one.
	Yeah, that's going to be much better.
	That's too small.
	It's going to be awesome.
	And I designed the shirt.
	I didn't draw that.
	My cartoonist friend did.
	But I designed the shirt thinking of a big, huge, outlandish print.
	It's not meant to be subtle.
	Right.
	It's not a horse.
	It's supposed to be exaggerated.
	Yeah.
	So you know how it works?
	The show is free for the first half hour.
	Then we jump behind the paywall.
	We take calls.
	This show, we get to know the people.
	That's key.
	But before we do, we'd like to welcome back Johnny Apple CBD.
	What?
	Well, I talked to our friend at seven.
	But they fired What's His Face for being a retard.
	Now, I'm done trusting people.
	Like, we are living in an era of telephone that's brutal.
	Like, I got a call from Ethan Nardine's lawyer, who's a great guy, by the way, and that case is fucking nuts.
	But he's like, you're trying to raise money for Ethan?
	I go, I mean, I could try, but no?
	I thought Ethan had money.
	He goes, oh, that's what people are saying.
	I'm sick of this, like, I heard that you want to do that.
	No.
	No more.
	I'm talking to the boss.
	HNIC, Apple CBD, the CEO of CBD.
	Not another word word for end.
	It's a nice guy to announce Johnny Apple CBD to the end.
	I heard that too.
	And go with what you know.
	The story is the rebranding, so don't say Johnny Apple TV.
	Okay.
	Thank you.
	Thank you.
	Yeah.
	All right.
	You're also going to work on your own bullshit detector there, Rygai.
	So we'd like to welcome back, Welcome Time, JohnnyApple.com.
	AH DVD.
	What can you use this shit for?
	Oh, everything.
	Sleeping better at night.
	You got sore joints.
	You got sore muscles from working out.
	You put the DVD on.
	It instantly stops the aching pains.
	It's a magical thing.
	I think God is sending his little wink wink when he made whatever is in this.
	The hemp plant.
	It's not THC, right?
	There's no THC.
	Well, you can get CBD gummies with Delta 8, and it'll make you feel like you're half a kite.
	Yeah, my wife had too many of those, and we had a bit of a night.
	It's totally legal, but not a fucking joke, so be careful.
	You know what's going on with that shit?
	Do not have three if you don't have a high talent.
	You know what I had to do to keep her alive?
	Sing and dance and tell stories.
	Basically do the Gavin McInnes show like full blast for till 2.30 in the morning.
	To prevent a bad trip.
	Yeah, just keeping her laughing and like, hello, my baby.
	Hello, my honey.
	Whoa.
	And then I was over here and telling stories.
	Yeah, because if you don't, then you get those moments where she's like, we're all going to die one day, aren't you?
	Paranoia.
	I had to just keep on.
	And then she goes, you love that kind of shit.
	No, the court jester does not love singing and dancing till 2.30 in the morning to save you from having a bad trip.
	But anyway, you know what she used it for once?
	On her feet, on a night out when she's going to be wearing high-heel shoes, she put the CBD cream on her feet to avoid aches there.
	They do say transdermal is the best way to absorb it.
	So Johnny Apple CBD, also johnnyapple.com.
	Tinctures are great in your coffee.
	Takes the edge off the caffeine.
	It's kind of spooky how effective this is in virtually any shape or form that you sell it.
	There's something magical about the hemp plant, and I think God is sending us a message because it just makes your life better.
	I was talking to Alex Stein today.
	Prime Time 99.
	Alex Stein, the guy who's been trolling all these...
	Patrolling all these town halls.
	And he thinks that the marijuana use that he does is curing his own cancer.
	He doesn't have cancer, but he thinks it's keeping it away.
	Kind of a genius, that guy, and kind of a nut.
	Is that the guy that's been going around talking about his trans five-year-old nephew that wants me?
	Yeah.
	I commend him.
	And he's like Johnny Appleseed, speaking of Johnny Apple CBD.
	He's going all over the country with these, from Hawaii to Portland to Mesquite to fucking Dallas.
	And then he's getting other guys to do their own.
	It's awesome.
	And it really reveals how nothing of a job these local politicians have.
	It's such garbage.
	They do nothing.
	But what are you saying?
	It cancels.
	It's just...
	It's amazing.
	I can't say what normal human being would sit in that room and just absorb that as if it's okay.
	Well, that's the real key right there.
	It's not just fuck you guys, this sucks.
	They're actually very well-written diatribes.
	Like the one where he was the soldier saying we need to go fight and die in World War III for Zelensky.
	Yeah.
	It was eloquent.
	It was beautifully written.
	Like if you read it, you'd go, this is a really good speech.
	So now we're drifting from trolling and pranks to performance art.
	Very talented guy.
	Johnny Apple CDD.
	Okay, that's enough for Johnny Apple.
	Look at this.
	So I got my car.
	You can show the car, Ryan.
	We got the Jag.
	Car Guys episode coming up.
	I won't give anything away, but we've made some incredible discoveries.
	Jag achieved.
	Look at that.
	Speaking of Alex Stein, he deals in used cars.
	I told him I paid $20,000 for that, and he goes, it's worth $6,500.
	So that was not great.
	But you got everything new under the hood, too.
	And the suspension he mentioned.
	He replaces the suspension.
	I think he got a nice little deal there.
	They put the first bid was $8,000.
	It ended up at $13,000.
	I had to trailer it to their shop.
	That was another, I don't know, $15.
	They did like $3,000 of repairs.
	It kept adding up until it was around $20,000.
	But anyway, those guys get free shit from Budweiser, which, you know, makes one come in his drawers.
	But then you see it.
	And you go, though it's still the king of beers, the king didn't spread the budget.
	It's also the king of shit.
	Like, look at this.
	This is one thing they get.
	And they encourage him to wear this and stuff.
	This is like the kind of gross hat your dad wears.
	Like, my dad wears a hat like this.
	It says Iowa Hawks.
	He has no idea who the Iowa Hawks are.
	He just found it.
	It's a Forduroy or no?
	No, it's just red, whatever.
	Cotton.
	This is one of your dad's found hats.
	So that's a no.
	Garbage sunglasses.
	I love your new sunglasses.
	I like your new sunglasses.
	Look at these.
	Am I in Devo?
	Yeah, crack that whip.
	Beer koozie, whatever.
	And then just like an undershirt.
	I don't know.
	Life beater.
	It looks like a Filipino street vendor would have this on.
	And the weird thing is the label is like frayed to shit, implying they get these from the Philippines and they put their logo on it.
	I don't know.
	It's got a bit of a used vibe.
	So that's good.
	It would probably cost about 56 cents for all that stuff per box.
	Now look at these.
	Like the reason I love 80s Bud merch is it's all high quality.
	Like my Bud hat is blue corduroy and leather and stuff.
	These are Budweiser overalls, right?
	And it's the same kind of vibe when your wife makes, you know, buys the whole family some Christmas, you know, fake Christmas sweaters or little jumpsuits from pajama.com or whatever.
	What kind of material is it?
	Good question.
	It feels like adult diapers.
	Is it a synthetic picture?
	You wouldn't want to wear it near.
	Polyester.
	Hey, you don't want to wear that near fire.
	Like a grill or stove.
	It'll melt.
	It's just fucking shit.
	Like pure shade.
	And then check out this.
	This is the king of beers, right?
	King of beers.
	So it's a garbage party city crown with foam in it.
	And then just this shit cake.
	It almost looked like burger cake.
	Yeah, like.
	Are you going to wear that around?
	It's the kind of thing where you're going to a Halloween party and they go, oh, you have to dress up.
	And you go, oh, I didn't bother.
	And they go, come on, dude, everyone's dressing up.
	You have to.
	And you go, ah, okay, can we stop in here?
	There, I'm a king.
	Hey, I'm a king.
	So I don't want to be sponsored by Bud.
	It's quiet.
	Yeah, no, it's quiet for him.
	It's really quiet.
	Hard pass.
	In the news, we have a new Biden-ism.
	I thought this could be fun where we try to figure out what the fuck he's saying.
	I think we're getting really good at understanding Joe Biden.
	Speaking Joe Biden.
	And being good at it, if you will.
	That's been a long time for that one.
	It was great the other day how he was just dismissed when Obama was at the White House.
	He was like caught outside of the stream of air and he was just spinning around.
	Well, you know what I like?
	Everyone's talking about that nonstop and it's got so much more meat to that bone than the fucking Will Smith slap where you injured that for a week.
	Shut up.
	Oh, it's still going on now.
	Someone lost his temper and he's a moron and he hit another pussy.
	Okay, gotcha.
	But this, ignoring Joe Biden and abusing him publicly.
	That's not a good look for the country.
	That's not a good look for the country.
	It also shows that they've completely given up on him.
	He's dead to them.
	And when I say them, I mean Obama, Biden's chief of staff, who's running the country, Valerie Jarrett, Kamala Harris, and basically everyone in the White House, too.
	Like the way they were fawning over Barry, Barack Toboggan.
	Yep.
	Biden.
	On him I can defend.
	My pet.
	Biden.
	A monster of a president.
	He's big and food.
	Sleepy.
	But a friendly monster too.
	My cat.
	Biden.
	Wait, what?
	That doesn't rhyme.
	Stop.
	You ready?
	I want you guys to prick up your ears, as they say in England.
	See if you can do this.
	You might need a pen.
	To ensure this be raid of America, we upheld a promise.
	Whoa.
	A promise.
	You know what it is.
	Most people don't.
	Okay.
	Are we ready?
	What?
	Wait, wait, wait, give me a second.
	We're doing it one more time.
	This has got to be...
	It's a game show with Kyle Dunnegan, but I think this would be a fun game show mainstream.
	You know what it is?
	Most people...
	I know.
	Okay, you ready?
	You want to do the beginning?
	Yes.
	Go.
	To ensure this reveable America wins.
	That's the really hard part.
	To sure we're an agreeable America?
	That's to ensure is, I'm pretty confident on that.
	I think you said it was to ensure we're an agreeable America.
	Okay, the beginning is, you know what it is.
	Most people don't.
	To ensure, then I have a lot of trouble.
	And then I go, we upheld a promise.
	It's easy at the end.
	It's like a bronosaur or a brachiosaurus.
	It's pretty easy at the beginning, then it gets really difficult in the middle, and then it's easy again at the other end.
	Jesus Christ.
	You know what it is.
	Most people don't.
	Got it.
	To ensure that we live with America, we upheld a promise.
	Oh, we upheld a promise.
	That part.
	To ensure that we something America.
	And then, what is it after we upheld a promise?
	I got that.
	Hey, we're only missing like one word here.
	This is like...
	Sounds like an agreeable.
	This is wordle.
	Yeah.
	We got all the vowels.
	To ensure the agreement of America.
	We up.
	Agreeable America is seeming like it.
	Best bet so far.
	To ensure the dream of America.
	No, to ensure the...
	Can you turn it up?
	Yeah.
	I find blaring it really helps.
	And as much as this sounds crazy, you've been looking at the actual clip.
	Oh, is it not behind me?
	No.
	We should also make clear, Maddie doesn't have a screen.
	The Mets are opening now.
	Can you aim the camera at the Mets?
	Is it just...
	Oh, he's talking.
	There he is.
	There we go.
	Contributors, rebearer America.
	We are public.
	The agreeable American...
	Rebuild America.
	Oh, that's better.
	We made a promise to rebuild, build back better.
	But...
	Why are you wearing a fucking hat and a suit?
	Do you just like making me crazy?
	He's wearing a fluorescent green beanie and a fucking gray suit.
	Rebuild and agreeable.
	Rebuild?
	Rebel?
	Yeah, rebuild.
	Because we made a promise.
	You know what it is.
	Most people don't.
	To ensure that we rebuild America.
	We upheld a promise.
	Yep.
	I think that's pretty solid there.
	Yeah.
	I'd throw that in, throw it down in the ring.
	How did we get that channel back on it?
	It wasn't dead.
	What happened?
	Interfile section.
	However, some fucking up shit.
	I didn't even pay it.
	I don't even know when it went out.
	Okay, well here.
	You try to figure it out.
	It's in my favorites.
	SNY is in my favorites in TV, mate.
	What are you doing, right?
	Okay.
	Because I want to read the next sponsor.
	Oh, shit.
	This is not very exciting TV here.
	We're blowing it.
	Did you honestly wear that hat to make me crazy?
	You did it to style your locks.
	What the fuck?
	And you know what you do when you mess with your hair, you change it like 1%.
	Maybe.
	It doesn't look different to anyone but you.
	When you do it 1%.
	And Maddie looks super dark.
	Yeah.
	The light went out.
	Oh, it went out?
	No, it didn't.
	This is terrible TV.
	Okay.
	I want to thank Beard Vet for coming back.
	Let's worry about the technical shit in a second.
	Let's get Beard Vet out there.
	Beard Vet, two things.
	It's a lot of things.
	Most of these vets that we have sponsoring us have incredible work ethics, so they never just sell one thing.
	Even when they sell the coffee or the beard cream, there's always like kits involved and all kinds of shit.
	Maybe they get, do they get the work ethic from being in the military?
	Or is being in the military just a natural thing for them because they already had good work ethic and discipline when they went there?
	Beard oils, beard grooming kits, beard grooming products.
	We drink the coffee here.
	El Diablo is a kick in the ass.
	You know what's fun to do?
	You get the El Diablo from Beard Vet, and then you give a little sprinkle of the Johnny Apple CBD tincture.
	So you get the intense roller coaster ride of their strongest coffee without any of the sketchiness that most coffee has.
	Beardvet.com, promo code Gavin, 15% off.
	And my point with all of these is you're getting coffee, so why not get coffee from one of us?
	Someone who supports free speech, someone who wants to make America great again.
	You know?
	Absolutely.
	When I found an optometrist who was MAGA, he's in the city, but I go see him every time I need glasses.
	Because I'm getting glasses anyway.
	I might as well direct it towards him.
	So direct your coffee buying to beardvet.com.
	Use promo code Gavin and show them that you support the troops, you support America, and you want to make America great again.
	Beardvet.com, promo code Gavin.
	All right, what's happening over there?
	I don't know where your favorite is.
	Okay, in the meantime, I'd like to walk you all through a very easy to do thing.
	So we're going to go to the live show, and we're going to show you how to send a super chat or a paychat.
	Legally, we can't say super chat, but we know what it is.
	So you'll go to the live show on a desktop.
	You'll click the live show thing, and there's a little button here, donate to read a message on air.
	And you'll click that, and you'll fill it out, and then you will have a little thing that you can send into the show.
	And it would look like this.
	Gavin, can you rank the members of your whack pack from healthiest to unhealthiest?
	Maddie's not really a whack packer, obviously, but whatever.
	Sylvia and Donovan.
	I don't know what Donovan's disease does.
	Do they live a long life?
	I think they might.
	Is he kind of like Stephen Hawkins?
	Have you seen Donovan with his?
	He has the exact same disease as that guy with the normal head and the garbage body who's always on social media with his girlfriend.
	You've heard me today.
	And they're always doing the same thing.
	It's like, it's a TikTok where it's like, is she your nurse?
	Your helper?
	Your blah, blah.
	No, she's my wife.
	And you go, you guys, I know why you chose him now because you're a fucking attention whore and you love being the woman who's dating the gimp.
	If there was no social media, she'd be gone.
	She was in a little village in Ireland.
	Oh, geez.
	She'd be like, sorry, I got to go fuck a strong farmer.
	No one's paying attention to me.
	She's probably still doing that because he's not getting it up.
	Now that Gav is gone, Rye, I'm coming for that ass.
	I want that Asian zing.
	Yes.
	That sounds sexual and threatening at the same time.
	Yeah.
	Living dangerously.
	Some gay jokes aren't funny.
	Like some gay jokes where they go, I'm not gay, but I really would love to fuck you.
	You're at the top of my list.
	You're like, that's not how we do our gay jokes.
	This guy's being a dad.
	Congrats.
	Thanks for everything, Gavin.
	I'm finally becoming a dad.
	Many thanks to you.
	Blah, blah, blah.
	We don't have to read the ones under $100.
	All right.
	This isn't really a normal thing to do at the show, but maybe we should throw in a quick war on kids because that's been a constant theme here.
	You can play the interstitial.
	I like people getting a taste of what we've been playing through.
	Hello, fam!
	I had a text change upgrade.
	Who wants to pay up my back?
	We are living in an ageism era where children are seen as human garbage.
	Regulations to indoctrinate American school children with poisonous and divisive left-wing doctrines.
	So we did...
	Can I see how you do the Mets game?
	Yes.
	That'll be exciting.
	Top of the fourth.
	O-O-O-O.
	Oh, no.
	We have no degrome.
	Yeah, I still haven't heard how long he's going to be out.
	I'm not happy about that.
	No, I don't think anybody was.
	He's our Cy Young superstar.
	Anyway, so I think it was Monday's show, Tuesday's show.
	By the way, if I lose tonight, I lose 120.
	Ouch.
	Which is annoying.
	That's a big one.
	Is that like the normal?
	What's the average game you're paying?
	I both on the team, by the team.
	Sometimes it's 120.
	Sometimes I lose 80, depending the odds.
	Okay, so that's the range.
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	I think.
	But I got Gino Biscante betting 50 bucks on every Padres game, and then his buddy Matt betting $50 on every Yankees game, which is gay.
	Yankees.
	And then we have the bet with Jimmy.
	And then I have the bet with Jimmy where...
	He says you're going to be plus $11, and you say you're going to be down $1,100.
	I say $1,800.
	Oh, $1,800?
	Yep.
	So whoever's closer wins.
	I like it, though.
	It's already making this game more fun.
	Yeah.
	Got a little skin in the game.
	Yeah, I see those 0-0s and I go.
	Well, I don't know when's the last time a major league team, even the Mets, lost every game.
	I hope it's never happened.
	No.
	So on Monday, Tuesday, we were talking about this war on kids.
	It's been a constant theme with the show this week.
	We are wondering, there's definitely a gay agenda in schools.
	There's definitely a gay agenda at Disney.
	Are you trying to fuck kids or are you just trying to create little revolutionaries and separate us from our kids?
	There's a good argument for both.
	I have trouble thinking that entire industries are dying to groom kids.
	I know what happens with the Muslims in Britain, but I think it's just misguided, brainwashed liberals who might even be a little gay, just pushing gay shit because it's the new civil rights.
	It's the new anti-racism.
	I don't, I have trouble believing this many people, 50% of Disney want to fuck kids.
	But anyway, Chris Ruffio is the sort of brave heart of this entire monitoring movement.
	And the bulwark, which is a weird, bulwark means wall, but it's ironically an anti-Trump, allegedly Republican site, and it's just sellout cucks like the Lincoln Project who hate the right, but pretend to be right.
	So it sounds more noble, you know?
	Rhinos.
	Rhinos.
	They're like, we're policing our own.
	Yeah.
	So they wrote an entire article claiming that Chris Ruffio's report that Disney wants a minimum of 50% characters to be LGBTQ IA?
	I thought I was on the cutting edge of this shit.
	What's IA?
	Lesbian, gay, bi, trans, queer intersex.
	Intersex.
	Intersex.
	Oh, like if you have a cunt and a dick?
	Wouldn't that be a hermaphrodite?
	Yeah.
	I think it is a hermaphrodite.
	Because they always bring up, they don't say hermaphrodite anymore.
	They say intersex.
	And they always bring that up to talk about women in sports.
	And they're like, what team should intersex people play on?
	And you're like, oh, you mean all three of them?
	Yeah.
	Out of the 300.
	There's allegedly Jamie Lee Curtis.
	And then there was Chyna, the wrestler, whose clit was so big it looked like a kid's dick.
	I think that might have been doing massive amounts of testosterone.
	Could testosterone turn your clit into a kid's dick?
	Yuck.
	Anyway, she found a team just fine.
	But look how stupid this is.
	You know what I mean?
	LGBTQQIP2SAA.
	There's not one gay person in America that knows what that means.
	Lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, questioning, queer, intersex, pansexual, two-spirits, androgynous and asexual.
	Well, you know who knows it by heart.
	It's the 400-pound pink and light blue baby, like rainbow fucking Skittle hair with glasses.
	She's got like 8,000 things coming out of her face.
	And she's talking about her life.
	She memorizes it like nerds memorizing.
	She's saying like forwards and backwards.
	Yeah, and those are the ones doing the actual hard work of banning you from social media because they played video games as a chick.
	They became trans.
	They're not trans.
	They're not even gay.
	They're just lonely and bored and ugly and fat and weird.
	So when you insult trans, they take it personally.
	And that's why you'll notice censorship these days is fucking brutal on anyone who says anything remotely anti-trans.
	Like when the Babylon Bee said that Rachel Levine should win the Man of the Year Award, they freaked out, kicked him off Twitter.
	You know what?
	I'm having a hard time with this thing about when they're talking about the voting on the K through 3, talking to kids about being gay and trans.
	I'm like, we have like a fucking parental guidance.
	I don't even know if it's like a consortium or a.
	They make rules for when you had TV, you had G rated for kids and general audience.
	Yeah, PG-13 and PG and then R. Like, you don't start talking about sex with fucking kids.
	You don't start talking about like, oh, you said you wanted to be a girl today.
	And then you keep just bombarding with that, oh, he's deciding that he's going to be a girl.
	There's also the implication that these topics are floating around kids' heads.
	It never comes up.
	Here's the thing.
	The fucking human brain isn't fully developed until you're 25.
	You can't fucking do anything on your own.
	You can't have any medical procedures by yourself without your parents' consent if you're a minor.
	Like, have they just fucking foregone every fucking thing that this society has done since day one?
	Like, how do you talk to a fucking five-year-old about gender brain?
	People they know, kids know who fuck, are their parents.
	And why is anyone giving them?
	There's nothing worse than the thought of your parents having sex.
	So you're literally bringing up the worst thing that they know of.
	But why would any adult, any God, like intelligent adult want to sit down with someone else's child and talk about any sex?
	Yeah, something's wrong.
	Heterosexual, gay, whatever.
	Bill Burr says that.
	He goes, I used to love kids hanging out with kids.
	They're like little drunk guys.
	And now I'm just so scared of being called a pedophile that when they come up to me, I'm like, ugh.
	And it's true.
	Whenever you hang around with kids these days, you see a kid at like a barbecue or something, there's always this like, hey, I'm not a pedophile.
	Hey, it's going to be fun because they've mainstreamed sex in kids so much that you feel like you have to make it clear that you're not one of them.
	You just want to throw a ball back and forth.
	You know, are they going to let them get tattoos too?
	Because they know if they could change their gender, they should know what artwork they want on their body.
	Why is questioning in the acronym?
	If you're questioning, well, that's fine.
	Come back to me when you figure out what letter you are.
	You suck a dick and let me know how it was.
	Yeah.
	I want to be in the Hells Angels maybe or the Pagans.
	I'm not sure.
	Okay.
	Well, we're not going to bring you in here as a maybe.
	You don't need a group to make that decision for you.
	Yeah.
	You're not invited to the team.
	You're a family.
	If you're quite individual.
	Sorry.
	I wish you nothing but the best.
	Do your research.
	I think you're probably going to end up Q. But until you have a letter, you're not invited.
	One of the letters is not knowing what letter you are.
	Yeah.
	I have a theory of how all this, like, these groups of these misfits, like the Rainbow Skittle Hairs, 400 pounds, you know, non-binary.
	It's when everyone got a fucking participation trophy because they hated to be there.
	They were forced to be there.
	So they just looked at everything that was going on without them, but they were forced to be there.
	And they just picked it apart and they found solidarity with it.
	That's a good theory.
	My theory is that it's for ostracized losers who are ugly and have no social skills and they've never had any power.
	But then they got into tech.
	They got into video games because they were bored and alone.
	And that led them to tech and that led them to code.
	And now they're working at like Twitter, Facebook, whatever.
	And they're making up all these dumb rules and they get to enforce these stupid rules.
	Anyway, so the Bulwark told Chris Ruffo that he was lying when they said that they want 50% to be POCs or LGBTs.
	It doesn't work out.
	And then on their site, Chris points out that by 2022, 50% of regular and recurring characters across Disney General Entertainment scripted content will come from underrepresented groups.
	So they called his theory a conspiracy theory, but it's true.
	This is why the word conspiracy theory is no longer an insult.
	Maybe you just put it appropriate to what the population is.
	So what is trans like 0.0004?
	Yeah.
	1%.
	Wait a minute.
	Oh, I guess, yeah, you could say 50% are under the agenda.
	That would be representative of the community that you're from.
	They all add up to 50%, I guess.
	Anyway, here's another clip.
	Did I include that in the notes?
	Where this woman said she admitted to the gay agenda?
	I don't think I did.
	I don't see it here.
	It's this black woman, and she said, when I first started working at Disney, I was told they're really conservative and they don't like this and they don't like that and you can't swear and you can't do this.
	But then I got there and they all totally supported my not-so-secrety gay agenda.
	Maybe, oh, I sent it to you in a separate email.
	That's what it is, Ryan.
	Okay.
	I knew I sent it to you.
	My not-so-secret gay agenda.
	And everyone at Disney loved it.
	Well, they must have all hated the company policy then.
	So that to me means those crazy theories about the red panda representing homosexuality.
	Although I've heard people say it represents sexuality in general because it's a period.
	Menstruating.
	Because she goes to the bathroom and the red is there and she's embarrassed.
	God damn it, you fucking perverts.
	Can't you just do funny cartoons?
	Like Tom and Jerry?
	You want to see a cat beat up a mouse?
	Yeah.
	God, fuck it.
	Try to kill each other every day.
	Watch what happens when Tom catches Jerry.
	It's like, I love Disney's content.
	I grew up watching, you know, all of the classics.
	They have been a huge, like, informative part of my life.
	But at the same time, like, I worked at small studios most of my career.
	And I'd heard, you know, who hear whispers.
	Like, I'd heard things like, oh, you know, they won't let you show this at a Disney show.
	And I'm like, okay.
	So I was a little like sus when I started.
	But then my experience was bafflingly the opposite of what I had.
	It's such an LA way to talk, too.
	Like, you know, crowdfunding.
	It was so bafflingly different.
	And I had a career.
	I mean, we were working already.
	They call that cape in.
	When they do that at the end, then they're upspeaking.
	So we cut her off there.
	Go back.
	Our leadership over there has been so.
	Thank God there's closed captions and a sign language interpreter, just in case you're deaf and illiterate.
	Like my not-at-all secret gay agenda.
	And so I feel like attention deficit ordered kid can't read the fucking words or figure out the sign language and doesn't miss his movie.
	Did you hear what she said?
	My not-at-all secret gay agenda.
	On my little pocket of like, you know, CrowdFamily Disney TVA, the showrunners were super welcoming.
	Meredith Roberts and like our leadership over there has been so welcoming to like my like not at all secret gay agenda.
	And so like I feel like I felt like...
	Was she out there like pushing it on the crowds or was she like in an almost like she's a culturally appropriating annoying white woman?
	I mean like maybe it was that way in the past but I guess like something must have happened in the last like like they're turning it around they're going hard and then all that like momentum that I felt like that sense of I don't have to be afraid to like let's have these two characters shut up.
	I'm so sick of these people.
	So sick of this shit.
	Fucking it's like the most annoying girl in high school is now running the whole world.
	It's the tyranny of the oppressed.
	It's the tyranny of the shrill minority.
	It's the tyranny of the rejected.
	It's revenge of the nerds.
	Revenge of the boring.
	Over and over.
	Can we get back to meritocracy, please?
	Over and over and over.
	The person running things used to be really qualified.
	I don't think the family of five that's sitting on the fucking line for four hours going a magic, I mean, Space Mountain gives a fuck what you do in your bedroom.
	Nice fucking thousand degree weather.
	My wife and I are monogamous except during Lent where we have orgies.
	That's 40 days a year.
	We look forward to it all year and it's back to monogamy.
	Dan Savage does that.
	The gays are having trouble with monogamy in their marriages.
	So they're coming up with all these hacks.
	And one of them is like, you get a month off a year to go fuck other dudes.
	They may say that.
	They go fuck dudes every other.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	You guys don't get it.
	That's not the design here.
	What is a month anyway?
	What is what?
	What is a month anyway?
	Which month?
	I was using the Aztec calendar.
	Yeah.
	It won't be February or the other months with 28 days.
	It'll be February.
	Every month with 28 days.
	How's the Mets game going?
	Still 0-0, bottom four.
	Yes.
	Oops.
	All right.
	So that's enough newsy shit.
	Let's take one call so people can see what our people are like.
	Does that say how long DeGrom's going to be out for?
	15 stars last season.
	I have a theory that he is super far on the autism spectrum.
	Really?
	Yeah, in every interview, it's like he's a fucking robot.
	I like having fun, baseball, in school.
	Are you going to do some of your funny imitations, Ryan?
	Yep.
	There's no calls so far.
	Guys, call in.
	The number is, if you're listening, 718-400-6959.
	Yet again, that's 41869559.
	Why don't you play the mailbag thing and we'll start opening letters.
	Okay.
	Oh, we have calls coming in now.
	Okay.
	Maybe we'll hit a little bit of this.
	You are on air.
	I'm here to have a conversation.
	This is a fucking loser.
	You know, I'm here to learn, share, listen, understand why.
	Hey, why does everyone get two things?
	You have one thing.
	Thank you for calling.
	It's great meeting from you.
	Bye-bye.
	All right, next call.
	Did I show you the Gavs tab sign?
	No.
	I sent it to you.
	I have it.
	Pull it up here.
	Thank you to the guy who made this.
	He also sent you, Ryan.
	He had his four-year-old draw.
	We don't need to see commercials, thanks.
	He had his four-year-old draw a Buzz Lightyear for you.
	That's the sign that's on the door to the laundry room.
	That's at my home bar now.
	Look at that.
	Conceived of something, and then it happened.
	You brought it to fruition.
	Oh, that's awesome.
	Did I show you my pool table?
	Did we talk about that?
	You showed me.
	I don't know what you showed Ryan.
	Did we talk about this on the show?
	We got a pool table last night, a small one, right?
	Because we got kids, so it should be easy.
	My wife's renovating the bathroom upstairs or having it renovated.
	They pour cement on the floor to...
	They think they've totally sealed it with all the silicon and everything.
	Then they pour the cement on top.
	Cement drips through the floor into the basement, covers the pool table.
	From showing you the shower pan or the tub, yeah?
	That's post-cleaning.
	Go to the other one.
	I called the pool guys.
	I thought this might be kind of good, actually, because I thought the pool table was a little small.
	I'll just write it off for my insurance and then get a new one.
	And the contractor's like, I'll pay you everything you need.
	It's on my insurance, and I don't want it to go up.
	I had a flood at my old house, and we spent like $15,000 fixing up the front room perfectly.
	It didn't do shit to my insurance.
	there's fear of like using your insurance, I don't think it's justified.
	Yeah, turn that mic on.
	That was the only pool picture.
	But we do have a doll?
	No, I sent you another one.
	I definitely did.
	On my email, maybe.
	No, it was a text.
	I just checked him.
	Okay.
	I triple-checked, actually.
	Do you want to show this doll?
	Oh, yeah.
	Someone made a doll of me.
	I can't bring it into the house.
	I think they're making fun of me, but guess what?
	You gave me a huge cock and a six-pack.
	There's an Indian on my back with a baby Indian.
	That was nice.
	What are you wearing?
	I seem to be wearing lace shorts.
	Yeah.
	Is there a tattoo on your leg?
	There's a tattoo on your leg that says Gav?
	Yes.
	Cool?
	Cool.
	It's kind of inaccurate, but nice.
	Nice touch.
	What, I'm not Gav?
	You don't have a tattoo.
	This is Gav.
	Yeah, you've got to see this picture.
	This is a really good picture.
	I've played pool on this brand new table.
	Plus, we live in fucking Bavaria now in America.
	So we've waited about five months for this pool table, and that's what it looked like today.
	That's cement.
	Wow.
	It looks like a Pink Floyd album cover or something.
	Yeah, that's pretty trippy.
	We got a caller on the line.
	But I called the pool guys, and they said, we'll just replace the felt.
	It'll be like 600 bucks.
	Yeah, slate's not going to get damaged.
	Right.
	Yeah.
	Emily was all worried about the wood buckling.
	And I go, it's not wood under there.
	It's slate.
	Yeah.
	Fucking slate.
	Slate.
	Caller, you're on the line.
	Hello.
	What's going on there, Caller?
	Hello.
	Uhuru.
	Uhuru.
	I have a recommendation of someone who would make a fantastic, like, censored presents interview with Gav.
	I'm not sure if you've heard of him.
	Ryan might know him because more plates Moroccan actually did a video about his test levels a couple weeks ago.
	His name's Andrew Tate.
	Andrew Tate.
	Did his ancestors live somewhere in between the bag and the butthole?
	Yeah, in between Alberta and wherever you grew up in in England.
	I don't know.
	But no.
	What's his name?
	He actually had Andrew Tate, T-A-T-E.
	Ah, okay.
	So he actually had a beef with Scott Adams that, man, blew up into just crazy stuff.
	So during when COVID first started, Scott Adams was completely on the whole mask up and quarantine and government.
	And Andrew Tate on Twitter called him out on it and was like, hey, man, you're a coward.
	Now you're trying to walk back all the stuff you said at the beginning of the pandemic.
	Like you weren't a freaking lapdog for the left.
	And now you're trying to flip the script, but you're a coward.
	And they were just going back and forth on Twitter.
	And it was just this huge ordeal.
	So what Andrew did was he messaged his wife.
	He started messaging Scott Adams' wife on Instagram and offered to fly her to his house.
	And she was completely on board with it.
	And right when that happened, he aired out all of the Instagram DMs he did with his wife on Twitter.
	And now they're divorced.
	That was his wife, that little girl?
	He was with like a 23-year-old.
	Well, to be honest, his wife.
	The marriage was over way before that.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, that was his wife.
	Your wife shouldn't be one MMA DM away from saying bye-bye.
	Yeah, but I mean, it was really hilarious.
	It's just like, women hate cowards.
	Scott Adams is a coward.
	Look how his wife talks to other men in her DMs.
	You know what I guarantee happened with their marriage?
	You fuck this beautiful, awesome 23-year-old.
	The tits are amazing.
	You haven't had tits like that in a while.
	Her ass is like you can bounce a dime off it.
	Then after about six months of jizzing, you're like, can you fucking shut up?
	I don't care.
	And then you're stuck with her.
	And yeah, later details came out about that.
	Apparently, she was screwing her ex-boyfriend and his flight instructor for part of the time.
	And yeah, Scott Adams just got exposed as a total cuck.
	I mean, it's just everyone who comments that on his Twitter just gets blocked immediately.
	I got blocked immediately.
	But it was really funny, like, back and forth.
	All right.
	Thanks for calling.
	Juicy Gossip.
	We're considering.
	I are beware for his ex-wife.
	You know, I wanted these sit-downs to be free of links because the show is so link-heavy.
	But if we were interviewing him, we'd have to pull up all this shit, right?
	You can't just talk about them like they're this sort of ethereal, non-existent, philosophical idea.
	Sunglasses inside, corny.
	Let's see.
	Also, by the way, guys, you come up with these guests.
	If that guy's been on Tom Segura's podcast, then he's mainstream.
	No one mainstream is going to touch me with a million-foot pole.
	He might be one of those guys that don't give a F. Zubi came and saw you.
	Zubi?
	Yeah, that was weird.
	There's a group of people.
	You were flying private jets out of Miami the other day.
	Really?
	Yeah.
	We might get Zuby on the network.
	But like John Joseph Cro-Mags, I texted him the other day.
	Maybe he's got a new number, but no response.
	Just moved to Florida.
	Okay.
	I'm trading for the triathlon.
	Tom, you're online.
	Oh, we should kick off the freebies.
	Oh, yeah.
	So that was a long time to spend in freebie town.
	We're going to go behind the paywall now.
	You guys took advantage of us.
	You used us.
	You raped us, and we're done with you.
	So, to everyone who is watching this or hearing this for free, go fuck yourself.
	Go to censor.tv and unfuck yourself for $10 a month.
	Get fired.
	Get in trouble.
	Be brave.
	Unt never stop fighting this.
	These times are kind of strange.
	I kind of drive the pain from putting the shores because I look fast.
	I just wanna come and do my.
	But the maiden I'm gonna do said it's dangerous.
	And I just wanna show ya what I can do back dangerous.
	I'm just staying home and be lazy.
	And you know I wanna die somewhere.
	But I'm just staying home and see baby.
	And you know I'm gonna buy two passions.
	This was crazy.
	It's at the water park.
	It was going in every direction.
	I had to clean up the toilet after.
	Oh, Jesus.
	I had four different jets.
	It's got away from you.
	With his foreskin peeled back and still choo-choo choo chew.
	Is that one of those ones where you have to separate the p-hole?
	I should have.
	Apparently.
	I've never separated the p-hole before.
	Usually it works.
	Maybe I didn't have to go piss bad enough so it didn't just come blasting out.
	I have a Prince Albert, so I have a.
	Do you?
	Yeah.
	What the fuck?
	I didn't know this.
	I've seen it.
	Oh.
	I'm not adverse to not pulling my penis out in the bar every now and then.
	So do you still have the actual jewelry in your dick?
	Not right.
	I don't have it in the second, but I put it in probably three weeks out of the month.
	For old times?
	Three weeks out of the month?
	I've had it since like 1991.
	So when we're sitting at the bar and I'm talking to you, you have jewelry in your dick.
	And when you piss, does it come out different holes?
	Well, it'll drip out of the bottom.
	Like right where your head ends and it gets a shaft, it'll drip out of there.
	And then it hits the ring and it goes immediately right back into a stream.
	Oh, and what if the ring isn't there?
	Does it come out of two holes?
	It'll still drip out of the bottom a little bit.
	Underneath.
	Hey, Gavin and Maddie, have you guys ever celebrated Tartan Day?
	It's basically Pat's for Scots Americans.
	Great way to get fucked up.
	Oh, hi.
	Yeah, I think there's a big parade in New York.
	The Tartan Day Parade.
	Yeah, it's fun.
	I remember they were going to have Sean Connery fronting it once, and my grandmother was really pissed off.
	She goes, he's as Irish as the pegs of Doggerty.
	He has a tattoo of Scotland forever on his forearm.
	Oh, really?
	Yeah.
	He's got that weird fucking accent.
	Maddie's got some bad news.
	Oh, by the way.
	Oh, yeah.
	I was hurt yesterday.
	So you're on a Triumph message board.
	Yeah, I'm on Facebook.
	Okay.
	I'm on this, you know, Triumph Tiger 1200 parts in sales.
	And there was a guy up there.
	He said, if, you know, if anybody needs Triumph Tiger parts, let me know.
	So I was probably like the fifth or sixth person that was in there, like, communicating with the guy.
	And, you know, he sold me on it.
	He had pictures of both parts of the ship.
	He sold you on what?
	Well, he sent me.
	I said, well, let me see the picture.
	I wanted to see underneath.
	But the viewers don't know what you're talking about.
	Oh, the seat on my triumph.
	You wanted to get a new seat?
	Yes.
	I wanted to get a new seat.
	The top is all, I've got 40,000 miles on that bike now, so it's starting to deteriorate.
	So, you know, new, they go from like 300 bucks to like 699 bucks.
	So me being Scottish and cheap, I'm going to go buy a used one.
	I should have just went and bought a fucking new one because the guy beat me for $180 fucking dollars.
	So he took your money and you sent it via what?
	Zell.
	I zelled it to him.
	Now, I'm new to all this stuff.
	Yeah, I'm not too familiar with it either.
	It's like...
	Is it insured?
	No, it's almost like a cash-to-cash transaction.
	Like, if I handed him money.
	Is he right about that, Ryan?
	Yeah.
	That's my understanding.
	It's called the P2P.
	That chemicals to make personal meth.
	But it's called person-to-person.
	So it's not, I don't think it's not, most institutions won't cover it.
	Ryan's a big Venmo guy.
	Ryan, have you ever sent money and then it was wrong and you got it back?
	The only time they'll do it is if you send it to the wrong person.
	Yeah, I think that's it, and then I stopped it.
	Unintentionally sent it to the wrong person.
	Right, so that's still this wrong person.
	So you're like, well, who are you sending it to?
	I'll be like, I don't know.
	Someone with a bike.
	I got to find him.
	So it's like, oh, send it to my partner's email.
	Because you just sent an email, like, attached it to the email and went, it was it.
	So you got played for $180.
	Got suckered by, from what I understand, a guy's 68 years old.
	He lives in North Carolina.
	His name is Ron Ron Ron Ron Ron.
	And then he just blocked me.
	Whoa.
	So you're fucked.
	Because the reason I bring this up, because I've been there before, you just lie in bed and you steam.
	I slept two hours and 56 minutes last night.
	Wow.
	Because I was steaming.
	I was pacing.
	It was bad.
	And the worst part is, because I had a guy rip me off with the Budweiser bag, and then we had a baby monster nice enough to get a cool one.
	And I finally track him down, and I find his house on Google Maps, whatever, and it's like it's worth 40 grand.
	It's barely a house in the middle of nowhere.
	And I'm like, what am I going to do?
	Sue this guy?
	Yeah, this guy lived in a trailer park, and it was a pretty new one because his daughter had just paid $125,000 for it.
	Oh, really?
	Yeah.
	That must be a nice fucking trailer.
	Yeah, in the trailer park.
	This guy loves you.
	He's gay.
	Yeah, see, that's what I meant when I was saying earlier.
	Like, when gay jokes are just sort of like weird.
	Love you, Maddie.
	I'm gay.
	Burton Stantal Cummings.
	Yeah.
	Life are the gay guys that love me.
	That's not how we do gay jokes.
	$100.
	How you do gay jokes is it has to be remotely plausible that you want to fuck the guy.
	So there's some possible, like, how much of this is a joke?
	It has to sound believable.
	When it's just like, I love you, I'm gay.
	Shut up.
	My wife and I love your show married for poker years.
	What does that say?
	For over three years.
	Over three years.
	It's not even a drop in the bucket.
	You're an amateur, dude.
	How do you even have time to do it?
	You're still getting over the honeymoon.
	I want many kids.
	She's from Germany.
	Uh-oh.
	She likes kids, but well, that's a problem.
	I get this hesitant vibe.
	Misplaced maternal instinct for sure is visible in the dog, goats, and chickens we have.
	How can I convince her that y'all just jizen her, dude?
	Fucking jizzen her.
	Is she like...
	I've heard this a million times, especially from Europeans.
	I wonder if she's German, like German proper, like raised there.
	Oh, she is.
	Because their way of talking, it's so frightened.
	It sounds like they're yelling all the time.
	They might just be missing.
	And they're so mean.
	I'm not interested in speaking with you because I think you tend to have a slightly lower IQ than me, so I'm struggling to sort of dumb down my quotes.
	So we're going to have to end this conversation.
	I have to stay five meters away from you.
	Too honest.
	They call me Peter.
	Somebody sent this in.
	It's a bird which is the bald eagle on a radio station.
	Stereotyping food racist.
	Food racist.
	Okay, Cole.
	You want the four-packed Knotts Berry Farm?
	What's a food racist?
	Well, God bless America and the bird which is the bald eagle.
	Thank you, guys.
	There you go.
	Thank you so much.
	I love when he says that with a southern accent.
	The bird which is the bald eagle.
	That sounds like something Rodney do during a toast.
	That's right.
	Hello, Liz.
	That sounds like a good show.
	Heidi and Frank joking about food racists.
	Caller, I've been waiting for a bit here.
	Oh, shit.
	Okay, there we go.
	Tom, 610, you're on the line.
	What up, fellas?
	Happy Thursday.
	What's happening?
	Happy Thursday to you.
	Nada.
	All right.
	I have a funny question for Gavin.
	Gav, LC Sound Systems had a 20th anniversary party recently.
	I assume you were not invited to that.
	I feel like James Murphy's borderline pilled.
	Give any input there?
	He seems almost cool, but obviously he's been around too much corny Brooklyn artist garbage for too long.
	Yeah, that's got to seep into your skull.
	I mean, if you're red-pilled in that scene and he's talking about James Murphy LCD sound system, the sort of early hipster electronic music people from the early aughts who became very successful, those guys are always pretty funny and kind of tough in a weird way.
	Not tough like they're going to beat you up, but kind of edgy.
	Like we signed this band Vietnam, and I think they were all junkies.
	And James ran a record label too, and he emailed us and he says, don't make the same mistake Nixon made.
	Get out of Vietnam now.
	And he was right.
	They were a fucking mess.
	Is that Jimmy from Murphy's Law?
	No, no, no.
	Someone else?
	Yeah, that LCD sound system, that hipster dance music.
	But yeah, those guys do seem like they're good people.
	But, you know, you check, sometimes I check up on these old friends and I check the Instagram and it's like, stop killing black people, please.
	You're like, et too, Brute?
	Like, you fell for all this shit?
	You were funny.
	You told racist jokes that made me uncomfortable.
	And now you're like, I swear to God, if I see a fucking Nazi, I'm going to just burn him alive.
	What come?
	And the stupid, even like ex-girlfriends I dig up or ex-babysitters we had for my kids that were super funny and tattooed and hilarious.
	And then I see their Instagram.
	It's just like every single person in fucking New York.
	The only ones who aren't complete idiots in Manhattan, as far as people I used to know, are cops.
	I think people in New York, their Instagram, that's just all virtue signaling.
	That might not be necessarily what their private opinions are.
	Well, I think what happens after a while is the two meld.
	Oh, I'm sure.
	There's some frost pollination there.
	You know, like British people, when they're working class and they're embarrassed of their East London accent, they start doing a middle class accent.
	And then you go, do your real accent.
	Then when you grow up, and they can't do it anymore.
	Yeah, it's like my mother's family was nine brothers and sisters or something like that.
	Maybe ten one passed away.
	And like some of them are closer to my age.
	Like I have an aunt that's not much older than me.
	And the first four or five kids, they had like a different broken down, like slummy Glasgow accent.
	And the other ones are a little more exact same story as my dad's family.
	A little bit posh.
	Yeah.
	My aunt Irene, she would be like, because they were driving around Glasgow once and the family, the Aunt Irene would pretend they were more wealthy than they were.
	She was living over in Bears Den.
	Yeah, and so my cousin was driving around with her in Glasgow and he's like, oh, I want to see the house you grew up in, Mom.
	The garbles.
	And it's a shithole.
	But she said, no, we will not be doing that.
	The McKinnises only move forwards.
	We do not move backwards.
	And that accent is a totally fake accent.
	My dad has it.
	He has it like, how are you, my boy?
	Absolutely A1.
	And I'm like, what are you, from England?
	And he goes, I have to speak like this because I've Learned over the years, I have to enunciate, or people don't understand me.
	And then when he's asleep, he's like, See you, you'll fucking body.
	So well, he seriously screams out loud in his sleep.
	I don't want to go right before he retired.
	He hated going to work so much that he would say that in his sleep, like when the alarm came out, I don't want to go.
	That's got to be sleep.
	That's got to be torture.
	Thanks for calling.
	Yeah, thanks for calling.
	I forgot that was a caller.
	I forgot we had a call on the way.
	Caught up in the old Scottish show.
	Got another one here.
	727, you're a line.
	What's going on, caller?
	Hello.
	American people, Ribbon America.
	Promise.
	You guys know this.
	I'm doing the promise of Ribald America.
	Not everybody else does.
	You put the bomb and the bombs and bombs and bombs.
	People talking about what he was about to say.
	727, you're on the line.
	You're amazing.
	You're amazing.
	Bite up.
	Burner?
	You want to talk about hot water or something like that?
	We didn't have hot water back then.
	The only thing we ate was cookies.
	Yeah, they call them cookies because if you have any cookies, they're going to get taken.
	So better bite them suckers while I last.
	Last at the breakfast table in the morning, you got your cookies.
	I love kookies.
	Caller, come on, man.
	Come on, dude.
	He hung up.
	Someone talk to Teddy Bear.
	Samantha.
	720.
	Hello.
	Hi.
	Hi.
	What's going on there, Samantha?
	Hey, Gavin.
	How's it going?
	Good.
	I'm right here.
	So I called in because I've seen on the news that a lot of states have these new emphasis bills.
	California has AB2223 and Maryland has, I think it's 669.
	And basically, you can kill your baby for up to 28 days.
	And the way they're sneaking this in is that they call them perinatal miscarriages.
	And most people think that perinatal means like stillborn.
	It just means the first month of birth or the first month of life.
	You know what's nuts?
	I think that's the hill to die on.
	And I wanted to know your opinion.
	Can I interject this real quick?
	So Dan Hollow just had a pro-life rallies with the church.
	And they had an FBI raid for the people that were protesting against abortion because they confiscated or broke into a materials dumpster outside.
	They found over 110 babies.
	And so the FBI stormed in on them for obtaining this evidence of just dead babies.
	Well, yeah, I heard about that woman, but it was five.
	She had five fetuses in her house.
	And we talked about this on the show.
	The angle was, this woman pretends she's pro-life, but she has fucking dead babies in her house.
	And it's like, yeah, she confiscated them from the people as evidence to show that these fetuses are being murdered.
	Now, I can't understand how they could say 20 days after it leaves the womb.
	Yeah, we haven't even started to get that.
	Unfortunately, I know someone dear and close to me who was at a very young age, like preprevescent, 12, 13 years old, who ended up having a late term, like almost the baby's coming out and they put like a needle in the head.
	Why didn't she get an abortion earlier?
	She hit it.
	So was she 12?
	13?
	Somewhere around there.
	So remember this, was it Northam, Ralph Northam, where they said, because I remember the Giuliani said, sorry, Cuomo said, you can have an abortion up to nine months.
	Trudeau, and then that's the law in New York.
	Trudeau made that law for all of Canada.
	You can have a baby up until nine months.
	And then obviously people start going, wait a minute, what about nine months in one minute?
	What about when it comes out?
	And then Ralph, I think it was Ralph Northern, who said, well, that would be a discussion you'd have with your physician, and you guys would decide what was best.
	And everyone freaked out about that.
	Then we didn't really hear anything after that.
	I had assumed that the political left went, okay, I guess that's an area we should probably avoid.
	But now, according to this caller, things are way fucking worse than Ralph Northam's glitch.
	If we're talking about killing a 30-day-old baby.
	Yeah, that's exclusively murder.
	That should be...
	Like, my goal with abortion is to get the argument down to, like, 20 weeks.
	There has to be at least seven, I think.
	If whatever is the earliest it could survive outside the womb, I think life begins at conception.
	But let's at least get the debate down to that area where it couldn't survive outside the womb.
	Now they're doing the opposite.
	They're extending it 30.
	How the fuck do you kill it with a ball peen hammer?
	Throw it in bleach?
	You can't.
	So that's the kicker.
	It's lack of aid that you're allowed to kill it.
	So essentially, you can let your baby starve and die of exposure.
	That's how it's legal.
	I mean, if you have it out already, just give it up for adoption.
	People need to start taking up arms.
	Exactly.
	And I don't want to hear excuses about those babies anymore either.
	You've been raped, you know it, and you should take a Plan B pill immediately.
	And that motherfucker should be hung in the streets.
	How do you make that decision?
	Like, the rape thing is totally exaggerated.
	And they exaggerate it to ridiculous proportions.
	What if the father rapes the daughter and she's 12?
	Can she have an abortion?
	And you're like, that's a pretty good time where you'd think they probably should.
	But why are you letting that freak occurrence, which I believe has happened in America once, defining the laws for the abortion?
	That's incredible, Carl.
	In Louisiana, they track how often just wanting an abortion for no reason is done.
	It's 57%.
	And what do you mean by no reason?
	Like, she's a mother.
	It's not a rape.
	She's not underage, like, 14 or 15.
	There's nothing wrong with the baby and no reason to abort it other than I don't want to be a mom.
	I'm not a husband.
	You know, Howard Stern always talks about how it's, and you can tell he means black.
	But he goes, these poor women, they're having cracked babies, and you want them to keep the babies.
	Then those babies end up being criminals and they end up going to jail.
	Believe it or not, the statistics show it the opposite way.
	If I remember, I've heard conversation a few times.
	If I remember correctly, the majority of them are upper middle-class white females.
	Yes.
	And they often already have a kid.
	And they go, I don't feel like one.
	I know a woman who was about to get married.
	She got pregnant.
	She wasn't quite ready then.
	So she had an abortion.
	And then she got pregnant like four months after she was married.
	So the kid was murdered for being like eight months early.
	Early.
	Sorry.
	All right.
	Thanks for letting me call.
	I do appreciate your time.
	I think I'm surprised that we talked about Civil War, about MAGA, and they're shitting their pants about J6, but this isn't a topic for Civil War, baby murder.
	Yeah, you're right.
	That's more than that.
	Thanks for calling.
	That's probably the heaviest call we've ever had on the show.
	I didn't realize that was happening.
	Now, the next question, of course, is, how often does that happen?
	Because that's the left defense, which is a weird defense.
	That's like saying, it's okay to fuck babies.
	It's not illegal.
	And then you get mad and they go, almost nobody does this.
	Calm down.
	We just don't want it to over-incarcerate.
	Actually, this is worse.
	Killing a baby is worse than fucking a baby.
	You don't fuck with children.
	Period.
	Well, we've gone beyond.
	We've gone beyond with...
	We've gone beyond not feeding them or slapping them around.
	Yeah, I'm going to starve them to death.
	I'm going to starve a baby to death.
	So wait a minute.
	What's negligence now?
	It's fucking homicide.
	Yeah, it's homicide.
	I remember seeing a vegan couple whose baby starved to death because they gave it an all-vegan diet, and they went to prison.
	Is that not illegal anymore?
	Well, it would be children.
	At least in those two states she mentioned, right?
	Wow.
	They may have not gotten convicted of murder.
	Maybe involuntary manslaughter because they thought they were feeding it.
	Right.
	You know what a lot of this is, too?
	We're the pussy generation.
	We're in weak times.
	And I think a lot of news is just like people just can't handle it.
	That's what happened with South Africa.
	Everyone goes, why did we turn our backs on South Africa?
	I'll tell you why.
	Because we saw some of the murders and we went, ew, and changed the channel.
	Because it was too gross.
	The bubble that's sugar-coated, and it's America.
	Yeah.
	I mean, they can't handle the truth.
	I think this story will die because your average person and news has become something everyone watches at dinner and stuff you're eating.
	And the average person cannot fucking handle the idea of a 28-year-old baby being murdered.
	I don't want to handle it, but we have to.
	All right, that's going to become a thread on the show.
	We have to keep updating that because that is.
	One, they're too level absorbed in themselves.
	And second, they could think about it and go, oh my God, that's, I can't feel, I can't even picture that.
	And they just brush it off.
	But they've never seen like the dead baby right in front of them.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, I've always said you should never do anything you can't Google image.
	Don't eat meat if you can't Google image an animal dying or being processed or whatever.
	And don't have an abortion if you can't Google image it.
	Most people can't Google image abortion.
	Wait a minute.
	What is this?
	Is this feminist?
	Are we supporting women's need for freedom?
	I thought the whole thing was my body, my choice.
	It's not even in your fucking body anymore.
	Right, but what's it now?
	My living room anymore.
	My bedroom, my choice.
	You're responsible for that body, but it's not in your body anymore.
	You did the hard part.
	Holy shit.
	Gavin, I know you're a fan of buying lingerie for the wife as I am.
	I check out this company on Instagram.
	I have searched far and wide the internet, and this one really speaks to my boner.
	Worbless lingerie.
	Also, why isn't all lingerie crotchless?
	The best part of it.
	Yeah, that's a good point.
	It's not like she's going to be walking around for a few hours in her fucking panties.
	Some of them have snaps.
	One time I bought my wife a corset, and it took forever to arrive, like five weeks.
	And we finally got it, and I thought my daughter had bought it, and I go into a room, I go, this is not appropriate.
	And she goes, that's not mine.
	I didn't buy that.
	I'm like, okay.
	Leave me the room.
	That's embarrassing.
	You know the problem with these, this kind of lingerie?
	You give it to your wife, and it's a pile of spaghetti.
	That's just garter belts and sockings.
	And she's got, no, no, but look at the top ones.
	Those are complicated.
	And now she's got to sort of untangle it and figure out what goes where.
	It looks sexy as hell, but you know, it's the visual.
	Yeah.
	Well, when you're married, you don't get it every day, so when it finally comes around, you're like, ooh, la la.
	I want to put some sprinkles, chocolate sprinkles on my ice cream.
	Can I get a beer?
	Sure.
	Gotcha.
	Get another callie here.
	Baby monster calling in 970.
	You're on the fucking line.
	Go ahead, 970.
	Let's go.
	Let's go.
	TikTok.
	TikTok, boys.
	TikTok.
	TikTok, Tika.
	Hey, I married a Sikh.
	Oh, you make me seek.
	Listen, dude, I don't want to, unless you want to know my details.
	I know you said you struggled with your marriage.
	You came very, very close to divorce, and it discarded away.
	How'd you do it?
	Do you mind sharing that?
	Or do you want to hear my shit?
	Are you about to get divorced?
	I don't think so, but we're kind of in the shitter.
	How long have you been married?
	Well, that's complicated.
	So, like I said, if you don't want to hear the details, I would rather hear from Gavin.
	It's not complicated.
	Just tell us how long.
	Are you legally married?
	Yeah, well, okay, so she's Sikh.
	Her parents were not cool with any sort of, like, you know how they live, right?
	So when she told them, like, a white guy, I liked this white guy, they basically disowned her for a period of about eight years.
	It's weird how you move to a country and it's for Boden to assimilate with the locals.
	Like, imagine you move to Japan.
	It's called racism.
	And you're like, I don't want any fucking nips coming over here in my American house here in Tokyo.
	Ooh, that's a hate crime right there.
	Well, I mean, that's the problem.
	They didn't assimilate well, but they're actually pretty cool.
	Now, for about eight years, it was like, you know, the princess bride story.
	I ended up like stealing her from her home and she lived with me.
	And for about eight years, we were kind of on the lamb.
	They didn't talk to her.
	And then finally, we did legally get married, but only like, you know, on my side of the family was involved and all that shit.
	That's married.
	Fast forward about like another five or seven years.
	We have a four-year-old now.
	And then when we had our first child, they finally came around.
	You know, they snapped out of their, whatever you want to call it.
	And they came around.
	They like me and all this shit.
	But I don't know, between COVID and the whole career paths that we have and all family life and all that shit, it's gone south.
	So trying to preserve what I have and try to keep it together.
	So you got one kid and he's four.
	Yeah.
	Go on a shitty, cheap vacation.
	I don't know where you are, but Jersey Shore, Dollywood.
	Go somewhere, not expensive, kind of lame.
	Camping is a lot to ask for, especially with a four-year-old.
	But just some stupid place.
	If you're into baseball, Cooperstown, where are you in the world?
	Just not Disneyland.
	We're in the southwest.
	We live in Arizona.
	Nice.
	Off the A Mountain, Hoover Dam.
	Yeah, there's all kinds of cool shit to do over there.
	You know, I would get so busy sometimes and other things.
	And my wife and I would spend time together after not seeing each other for like weeks.
	And she'd go, oh yeah, I forgot I like you.
	So what happened was the dynamic changed.
	Like when we were kind of eloping, I was the kind of the breadwinner and the provider and that kind of thing.
	And when her family basically abandoned her, I was, you know, I was a top priority.
	But then she's very ambitious and she eventually became more successful than me.
	And then the roles kind of split now.
	She became kind of the breadwinner and I took a back seat.
	And I listened to, I don't know, about a week ago, you talked about how, you know, guys who marry women who have good jobs and shit, you know, they deal with insecurity.
	I think I had that problem.
	Well, I hear you guys aren't exactly drowning in blowjobs.
	Dude, you got to be.
	Don't even go there.
	Yeah.
	What do you want?
	It's a problem.
	She comes home with her OR scrubs on in her briefcase.
	You're there in a house.
	No, no, it's not in the middle of the day.
	A long beard with a bowl of cheeriest.
	We're in the same.
	We're in the same industry, and I actually have more.
	I have by leagues, leagues, leagues beyond.
	Let's put it this way.
	We're in the same industry, and I have much more talent, much more experience, and much more savvy.
	But I'm a white male, and she's a Sikh woman.
	What's the industry?
	Airline.
	Ah, okay.
	Did you see on the show yesterday they're talking about Boeing with tequila bottles all over the fucking place because they were marrying Mexicans?
	No.
	No, I thought that was fucking interesting in hell, but no, she's got a high-paying job, you know, because she fits the demographic.
	I'm not saying it's affirmative action.
	I mean, she's definitely driven and all that shit, but it's a factor.
	I think, buddy, you got to just take charge in the relationships.
	I think a lot of women, they sort of put out these divorce feelers to see if you're in it for the long haul.
	And you got to be like, no.
	Did she get mad because her parents excommunicated her?
	Like, did she blame you?
	That's always been a contention.
	Like, I left my family for you.
	I left my family for you kind of thing.
	You know, that has always been a thing.
	But then when they came around, like, they loved, her family loved me.
	She's always been a bitch to my family.
	Right.
	I think that mentality has always been there.
	It's kind of a scar, right?
	But I'll take my licks.
	I haven't been the best father or husband because when she took the lead role in the parenting and kind of thing, she makes all the cash.
	I still provide and I still pay all the shit.
	But, you know, I took a huge hit when COVID rolled around and I was out of a job and I got super, you know, into my vices and stuff and just kind of put, you know, pay attention to the mess and I'll wake up and drink from the time I get up to the time I get down.
	When COVID hit around, I didn't drink a glass of water.
	I drank beer any waking moment, it was all beer from the bottom.
	Would you be wasted like bedwetting and slurring your words?
	No, not like you.
	I have a good fucking bladder and all that, but I would, and I didn't even really get drunk.
	It was just like, you know, I would consider.
	Yeah, that's fine.
	That's all perfectly legal.
	I think what's happening here is you, and we've Turned into the dating site here.
	You are putting your own insecurities onto yourself in this relationship, and you're pushing her away with all of this self-doubt by saying, Yeah, I get it.
	You probably want to divorce me, right?
	You're like, loser.
	You're like, Yeah, not interested.
	I get it.
	I get it.
	You're looking at me and you're thinking, You're the breadwinner, and I'm a zero.
	You got to stop that shit.
	You have to take charge.
	A relationship with a woman is not a democracy.
	It's a benevolent dictatorship.
	You are Tito.
	You are Stalin.
	You are running the show.
	So you decide you're going somewhere for a while.
	You handle something with your kid where you tell the kindergarten teacher that was unacceptable.
	Like, you got to get involved in shit.
	Plan stuff.
	Do stuff.
	Buy something.
	Buy a car.
	You know what I mean?
	Like, make major decisions.
	Because when you were on the lamb, you were making all the decisions, keeping everyone safe.
	And now you've given up the decision-making thing.
	That's your role.
	That's what she finds attractive about you.
	So you have to get back to taking charge.
	Even if you're full of shit, by the way.
	Like, I've been on planes with my wife where we're on, like, a one-prop plane in Costa Rica.
	The turbulence is about to kill us all.
	And I'm sitting there with my butt cheeks clenched like I'm getting raped, just going, honey, it's a bus in the sky, okay?
	Buses on the ground crash way more than buses in the fucking sky.
	You need to calm down.
	I'll hold your hand.
	And then I'm just looking at the window going, we're all going to fucking die.
	You know what I mean?
	Like, don't show any more weakness.
	I've heard that one before.
	It's my favorite go-to when we're talking about not showing weakness.
	You just got to pick a new mission.
	I followed your guidance because when this subject has been ongoing, actually, conveniently, this subject has been ongoing for a while.
	And I listened to it.
	And yeah, initially she's like, I want you to move out.
	It's the best thing to do.
	You know, separation is the key.
	And then, like, I think we could patch things up if you leave.
	And I'm like, okay, okay, I'll do it.
	I'll do it.
	I'll do it.
	I took a look.
	Hold on a minute.
	Give me a moment.
	I took a two-week sabbatical and I got some shit together.
	And I came back and I said, look, no, that's not going to happen.
	You know, I took the Gavin mentality.
	I said, look, look at this.
	No, we're not breaking up this thing.
	This is bullshit.
	So now we're back to kind of ground zero.
	And she's like, well, I'm looking for places to move out.
	I'm going to go.
	And so, yeah, if you're just going to stay here, I'm going to fucking move out.
	And then, so what happens to a situation where I'm 40.
	No, four.
	I mean, there's a four-year-old around and people are talking about moving out.
	Yeah, it's fucking stupid.
	That's such a 40.
	You gave up your family for eight or ten years and you're just going to throw it away now?
	Yeah, that's another question.
	All you do to the end.
	We're thinking like men, right?
	Okay, so let's think like men.
	So don't say that to her.
	That won't go over well.
	So what I'm saying is, yeah, the whole situation, like, I'm looking for houses and I'm going to move out.
	And I'm like, yeah, I'm calling her bluff.
	What does she want me to do?
	And again, it's like counseling.
	You need to deal with your addiction.
	You need to deal with your addiction.
	Go into counseling.
	I want marriage counseling.
	I'm like, I got to pay some fucking jerk off to some liberal nut job to try to die.
	That's bad news.
	My inefficiencies and my addictions.
	Come on, give me a fucking break.
	I don't have time for that shit.
	You're attracted to brunettes, right?
	You're attracted to packies?
	Dark, yeah.
	Well, that's what I'll do.
	So here's my advice.
	I wrote an article about this once.
	Divorce your wife.
	In your brain, divorce your wife.
	She's dead.
	All right, bye.
	Now you want a woman who looks like your type, who's into your kid and your kid likes.
	Okay, how about that woman that's in your house right now?
	Pretend she's this new seek chick in the neighborhood.
	Court her again from scratch.
	Call, you know, make all the decisions and stuff, just like you do when you're courting a woman, you're trying to date a chick, and remarry her in your mind.
	Don't tell her any of this, but start from scratch.
	Yeah, we got eight-year anniversary coming up in a week, and we have the same birthday.
	What would Gab WWGD?
	Well, it depends what your history is.
	If you guys fish, you fish.
	If you camp, you camp.
	If it's a movie, you movie.
	Well, we used to go.
	Get your parents to look after the kid.
	You know what you should do?
	Get your parents to look after the kid and go get a hotel.
	No, we fucking hate hotels, dude.
	We used to fly around all the time on the lamb, party, and drink.
	Well, maybe you should recreate that.
	What did Chinky say?
	His mic sucked.
	Maybe you should recreate that situation.
	I may believe.
	Chinese people.
	Anyway, we got to get another call.
	Thanks for calling.
	That's a lot to digest.
	I think we missed an important message there I wanted to answer.
	Oh, yeah.
	Can you go back to the maiden?
	Yeah.
	What happens if Mercedes gets a guilty verdict?
	Do you write off the political bias?
	Do you dare to continue to support a convicted child molester?
	I think it's bullshit, but how can anyone actually know what happened?
	Yeah, that's a tough one.
	Let me just rephrase the question and make it super easy for me.
	What happens if Mercedes is guilty?
	Then she's dead to me.
	I can't believe I trusted her.
	I'm stabbed in the back.
	I've been talking to a pedophile for the past fucking seven years on a regular basis, reading her letters, talking to her from prison.
	Everything I know is upside down.
	It would be almost the same as finding out Maddie was a pedophile.
	I've known Maddie much better, but I used to talk to Mercedes once a week.
	I hung out with her and her husband.
	She's a really cool person.
	I suspect that this is political persecution.
	I think there's a 99% chance she's innocent.
	There's a 1% chance she's guilty.
	But you didn't ask that.
	You said gets a guilty verdict.
	Right.
	You'll never know if she's truly guilty.
	You'll know if the state or the courts find her guilty.
	Well, there's things like you look at the way Ethan Nordine is being treated right now or Joe Biggs.
	So like if Ethan Nordine is found guilty, guilty doesn't matter.
	that's an easy one.
	I laugh it off and go, fuck you.
	I know exactly why he's not guilty.
	Same with Joe Biggs.
	Say with Brendan Vaughan, who did two months in jail for defending himself after he was strangled.
	Those guilty verdicts are simple.
	But I guess with this one, I'll say, okay, what made her guilty?
	The evidence.
	And if it was just still that girl, her daughter, saying some shit once, I think I would still believe Mercedes.
	Right.
	She still has a right to an appeal.
	And even if she did lose a trial and then did lose an appeal where it could still exhaust it to the Supreme Court.
	But even if all her appeals are exhausted, she still got counts guilty, you could always just go to the court and get all the records and look at it yourself.
	Yeah.
	What about a plea deal where you're saying you're guilty, but we all know that you're not guilty.
	I wouldn't take any plea deal that had that attached to it, sure.
	Well, her point is, she's lost her daughter forever anyway.
	It's not like she's going to become friends with her daughter.
	And when her child gets older.
	Yeah, when she gets older.
	She'll be able to understand the situation a lot better.
	So all we have for evidence is that the child implied there was sexual stuff going on.
	The child was, I think, 11 at the time.
	The dad was a born-again Christian who was back in her life.
	He had abandoned her.
	He was into surfing and stuff.
	But she's getting older now.
	She's easier to guide.
	And he wanted her back.
	What?
	And he's the chief medical guy for the children.
	No, that's a different ex-husband.
	Oh, a different ex-husband.
	Yeah, she's got a few.
	And so there was a massive incentive to get in her head and get her to say stuff.
	Well, obviously.
	They confiscated all of Mercedes' computers.
	Zero kiddie porn there.
	They go, well, proof of it is you have cameras around your bed and you have mess and you have guns.
	In other words, a porn star's house.
	I had four point restraints on the corner of my bed post.
	I had guns and crystal method too.
	And cameras.
	Yeah.
	It's not that bad of a girl.
	Believe me, it's on my mind all the time, though.
	It's like when I had that guy from the Memphis 3 on my old show, and I talked to Anthony about this because he was accused of killing little kids, right?
	The West Memphis 3.
	And most people accept that he was framed.
	But I'm sitting across from him face to face going, I really hope we're all fucking right about you being framed.
	Because if we're not, then I'm sitting here with a guy who murdered little kids.
	And that's bad.
	And by the way, since this happened, they...
	Although it's legal in two states, according to our previous caller.
	Sorry.
	They put out pictures of her and the guy asking if there were any other victims, and nobody's come forward.
	Because there was...
	See, that's what's sick, because now they're trying to prove that they're innocent when you're supposed to be presumed innocent.
	And they have to...
	It's now that she's trying to make the evidence, she has the burden to prove herself innocent when it's supposed to be the opposite way in America.
	It's fucking tough, man.
	And I've been through the court, they don't play fair.
	Because at the end of the day, the people who are in control of that environment and who are in the positions to make the decisions that could either fucking fuck destroy your whole life or vindicate you, they don't give two fucks about you.
	No.
	They're going to go home and they're going to order some Moojo white.
	Solid evidence came out that Mercedes had molested her daughter.
	I wouldn't know what up and down meant anymore.
	I'll accept it.
	I mean, I'm not going to fucking go to bat for a pedophile under any circumstances.
	But, you know, all of my instincts, everything I know about her, she's not even very sexual.
	You know what I mean?
	Like, she's not very flirty.
	It's only your job.
	Yeah.
	In fact, maybe that's why she was so good at porn because she didn't really feel anything about it.
	I don't think we ever had any, like, I've flirted with fucking Sylvia more.
	Like, I don't think we ever had a, like, oh, wouldn't you like that, you dirty dog?
	Like, zero.
	Anyway, it's a tough one, though.
	And it's, believe me, anyone who supports her, like Mark Randaza, I was talking to him about six months ago.
	It's all in the back of our minds.
	It's all possible.
	I remember when you asked me to find out where she actually was.
	And I never didn't really watch too much porn.
	I didn't know who she was professionally.
	But I don't know.
	I'll write her a letter and say, hey, you know, friend of Gavin's, no one who actually told him where you were, blah, blah, blah.
	Keep your head up.
	But I never seemed to get around.
	I'm bad.
	I don't write to anybody in jail that I know.
	She's been waiting for her first trial for what is it now?
	Five years?
	By the time they were.
	Before Trump was elected, right?
	Yeah.
	Right thereafter?
	It was post-Trump.
	I think it's because of Trump.
	See, but they got COVID because when they say, you know, you have the right to due process, the court, it's detrimental to make it drag out for social companies.
	They're going to say, oh, we couldn't go to court.
	COVID, this, that, and the other thing.
	Because when you stop your defense or the prosecution stops the prosecution, like, you each get a allotted certain amount of time.
	Like, you have to do stuff.
	So, like, you'll hear the attorneys and the DA and the judge say, listen, you know, I want to adjourn it for three months.
	You could take it against my time.
	Like, mark it against me is making it go further than what it is.
	Because everything is supposed to be a good thing.
	Have you ever heard?
	Like, five years waiting in jail for your first court date, that's got to be a world record.
	Remember there was that guy at Rikers who killed himself, the black kid?
	I got a piss.
	Hey.
	Yeah, but it's crazy.
	Tell people what the typical amount of time to wait is.
	Oh, at least a year, 12, 13 months?
	Minimum?
	You know, there's just so much, well, I don't know about in less populated areas, but here in New York, just because the caseloads are so big and, you know, trying to get motions r done and everything In a timely manner, it's life gets in the way, and that's why they let you adjourn it for X amounts of months.
	You could charge it against your time and all sorts of good shit.
	But again, like I said, I'm Maddie Shit Old Kitchen trying to be in a position to get yourself thrown in jail.
	You know, it's ironic is that while this is happening and she's waiting her court date, the world is now becoming an accepting of child pornography and child.
	So it's like, what the fuck are we even...
	By the time she gets the rain, maybe they just fucking be like, this hero.
	Come out a hero.
	Yes, you're the best rapist.
	Joe Biden's mystery man, Corn Pop.
	Corn Pop, man.
	Corn Pop did it.
	Crazy.
	Corn Pop.
	He was a crazy dude.
	If you look into it, there's not a lot of substantial evidence there.
	And there was like a leading questions thing with the fucking thing.
	I don't know.
	But there's no physical evidence of it.
	There's zero physical evidence.
	And the gun charges were all her computers, all her hard drives.
	They tried to hit her with the gun charges.
	Those dropped because they were not loaded.
	They didn't check the...
	But her crime wasn't having drugs in a house with guns in them.
	Well, that was one of the charges.
	They dropped that.
	Possession of a controlled substance while armed with a handgun.
	So there was nobody armed.
	They were not loaded.
	And they didn't test the containers which are identified visually as small containers of methamphetamine.
	No lab report was introduced in the court demonstrating that the powder was indeed a controlled substance.
	Visual alones don't constitute...
	Right.
	They have to tell you what it is.
	Same thing with a firearm.
	Just because you see what looks like a fucking handgun, unless you see the fucking gun operate, visual alone.
	It could just be a prop.
	Right.
	Visual...
	It's in the fucking...
	But wasn't that your charge?
	Wasn't your charge just visual?
	Yeah.
	No, well, the undercover agent ended up taking it, had it in his possession for a small period of time.
	So he would have operated it then?
	No, he didn't.
	And then he gave it away to somebody who said it was suicidal.
	It was crazy.
	Okay, so that's...
	He never proved it was a gun.
	You could have said it was a prop...
	If I have my appeal from the Supreme Court.
	So your argument was it could have been a prop gun from an action gun?
	Because the gun was, there was no chain of custody.
	He said I gave it to him at, like, say, 9 o'clock on a Friday.
	He said he had it for a very limited period of time because the gun was supposed, because I was leaving, I was in just outside of Alexandria, Virginia, Fairfax.
	And I was going to Ocean Beach, Maryland.
	So I was going there for a party.
	So when I was leaving the bar where we were hanging out, all the black suburbans and shit were there.
	I'm like, yo, as soon as we pull out of here, we're getting jacked up.
	So I had a fella.
	I'm not supposed to have a gun.
	They're going to tear the car apart anyway.
	So my buddy who was actually driving called the prospector over and happened to be the undercover guy.
	And I said, are you going to Maryland tomorrow?
	He says, yeah.
	I said, all right, well, bring this to me to Maryland.
	I said, you know, because down there, anyone over 21 can carry a gun wherever.
	It didn't make a difference.
	I just couldn't have it.
	I couldn't be in the vehicle with it.
	So I said, if you're coming to the party tomorrow, just bring this to me and I'll take it off your hands there.
	And David end up getting searched by all those black suburbans?
	No.
	That was the fucking kicker.
	That's almost worse than sending $180 for a bike seat as well.
	Somebody you don't fucking know with very limited information.
	All right, we're down to the wire here.
	We got 20 minutes left.
	Let's go bananas with these things.
	And I've never been so annoyed about a call.
	Okay.
	Are ties between you and Richard Spencer completely cut?
	Yeah.
	Hey, lazy asses.
	Not Maddie.
	I don't want to die.
	I pitched a censored golf show a few weeks ago.
	No, thanks.
	Golf is like fun to watch at the bar because it's pretty and you're watching a ball roll in.
	But getting into the semantics of golf, no.
	Logan's on the line.
	Okay, what's up, Logie?
	Hey, how you guys doing?
	What's going on?
	Hey, so I had a question for Davin and Maddie.
	Just because you guys are older, probably more experienced with this.
	So I just got broken up with this woman that I've been dating for a little bit over three years.
	And she broke up with me while I was in Alaska, which really sucked.
	And so when I came back home, you know, like she'd already said she was done.
	Like she wanted me to move my stuff out.
	But then we had gotten intimate a few times.
	And obviously when you see someone again, like some of those old feelings might come to the surface.
	But, you know, like, so I seen her like a week ago and we were intimate and like it was really nice.
	And then like four or five days go by because, you know, I moved out.
	I still had a few things there.
	But she pretty much just did like a 180 and totally changed her mind.
	So I guess my question is, when do you know when to just tip your hat and sort of walk away?
	Because I'm kind of, I don't know what to do.
	Well, how old are you?
	How old is she?
	She's 22 and I'm 27.
	Okay, so you started dating her when she was 19.
	Both pretty young.
	Yeah, around there.
	Yeah, yeah.
	I remember I had almost the same, similar issue with my ex-wife when we first separated.
	We were getting divorced.
	We knew we were getting divorced, but every now and then we would, you know, talk on the phone, I'll come get you and fuck our brains out and all that shit.
	So I had actually left and I went to my mother's house for, I think, about four weeks.
	And because I didn't have a new apartment and I didn't want to bring my son to like some fucking little shitty slummy.
	So I went to my mother's house.
	So my wife, my ex-wife knew I was staying there and I had my son that weekend.
	So my son's in his room.
	He had his room in my mother's house.
	So my ex-wife, I guess, gets a little horny or whatever and decides she's going to come to my mother's house at like 1.30 in the morning.
	So I hear someone knocking on my old bedroom door and she cracks the door and she's like, Maddie's Tracy.
	I'm like, what?
	I'm like, what the fuck are you doing here?
	It's like 1.30 in the morning.
	She's like, I thought you would be up.
	I go, I got Dylan.
	Are you going to be up in the morning with him?
	So she's like, no.
	So I was like, what are you doing?
	She's like, I don't want to drive drunk.
	She was going back to where we lived.
	I said, well, stay here.
	I said, whatever.
	So she, you know, gets a naked, falls from the bed.
	She starts pooling around, and I'm like, man, this is not.
	She got mad there because I said, no.
	And she goes, what do you mean?
	I go, listen, Tracy, there's nothing more that I want to do right now than fuck your brains out.
	I said, but then he's going to fucking fuck my head up.
	I said, one, we're going to have to deal with Dylan in the morning because he's going to come in my room the way.
	How old was he at the time?
	Oh, he was young, like three, four.
	And what did he do?
	I said, and then second, I'm going to have fucking think that everything's going to be good again.
	And you're going to be like, no, no, fucking, we're still getting divorced.
	Fuck that.
	Because she was drunk and horny and right.
	And that's what it happened at fucking like two o'clock in the morning at my mother's house.
	I hate you.
	And in the morning, my son came knocking on the door and he comes in.
	He goes, and he looks at me.
	He goes, is that mommy?
	I go, yeah.
	He goes, how'd she get here?
	I was like, oh, man.
	I go, that's your plusy girl.
	Did you fuck her?
	No.
	Really?
	Yep.
	Did she blow you?
	Nothing.
	Really?
	Slept naked in the bed next to me.
	Trust me.
	It was not easy.
	I'm going to come.
	I was probably 25.
	Here's what you do, Caller.
	You have to accept it.
	You do whatever you want.
	She drew first blood.
	So now the ball's in your court.
	You go out, you don't flaunt it with other girls, but you cheat on her, whatever that means.
	You fuck around.
	If she calls you, hey, we're at bowling.
	If you feel like going bowling, you go bowling.
	If you're out with your friends, she calls you.
	You're bored that night.
	At 22, 27.
	Yeah, then you're like, yeah, come on by.
	Whatever, man.
	Everything's cool.
	Everything's groovy.
	Right?
	And then there's going to be that time where she says, I love you.
	And then you know what you do?
	You turn her around and you fuck her in the ass for all of the bullshit that she put you through.
	Ready?
	This is what's going to happen.
	Every time she calls him, he's going to go because he wants to get laid and he wants to hang out with her, try to salvage it.
	The time he calls her and says, hey, why don't you come over?
	She's going to be like, nope.
	No, busy.
	He's never calling her.
	Oh, I would.
	But he's just living his life now.
	If she calls him, he's like, yeah, come on by.
	We're having a bud.
	Yeah, that time when she says no, that's it.
	Yeah, don't fucking call her.
	But if you're horny and bored and she wants to come by, like find a five or six.
	You know what I mean?
	Just use and abuse her until she says I love you and then punish her and start again.
	Oh my god.
	Get back in the field.
	Go bang a bunch of fives.
	Bang some fives.
	I almost said that to my son the other day.
	Oh, Jesus.
	He's 13, so I'm glad I didn't say it.
	But I think he has a girlfriend, but he wants to be.
	Oh, he's thinking about it.
	And I'm like, are you guys still together?
	How's it going with your girl?
	And he's like, I don't know, whatever.
	And I go, boy, when you get dumped, it really sucks.
	And I said, you're not a real man until you beat the shit out of someone, had the shit beaten out of you, broken a heart, and had your heart broken.
	And I go, so you might have one of those around the corner, the heart-broken one, and it's going to blow.
	And then I almost said, but if that does happen, the secret is to fuck a slew of fives, some fatties, and that'll get you going again.
	That'll get you back in the lineup.
	But you don't say that to 13-year-olds.
	No, no.
	16-year-olds, you might say it to.
	Fuck some fatties, son.
	And if you see your mom this weekend, just tell her, Satan, Satan, Satan!
	Hail Satan.
	Hail Satan.
	Jeremy.
	Spoke in class today.
	Jeremy spoke in.
	Hello.
	I'm a 110-year-old black guy.
	Hey, what's going on there, Jeremy?
	Hey, how's it going, guys?
	Good.
	Okay.
	Good.
	Good show tonight.
	Hey, I just wanted to say, Gavin, I think you need to fuck the mainstream.
	Nobody needs or wants it anymore.
	So don't even waste your time chasing those people.
	There are plenty of great up-and-comers, if you will, like Alex Stein, John Doyle.
	We've got to figure out, it's not necessarily a line, but what does it even mean to be a conservative anymore?
	Like, you and Ryan were talking about it in the car ride yesterday with Dave Rubin and his husband.
	It's like, this has been a point of contention with my wife and I. And the slope started with us.
	It started with conservatives trying to open the gate for more people to come in.
	Say you.
	No, you're right.
	You're right.
	I still feel that way, though.
	Like, I would never want to say gays can't be proud boys, but I think what the normal right does is they bend over backwards and they make sure that the black woman and the gay are at the very front on every pamphlet,
	on every pin, just like the left does.
	It's fucking pandering, and I'm sick of doing it, and I'm sick of hearing about it.
	So yeah, I don't do that.
	But I have no interest in getting accepted by Prager U or Turning Point USA and getting on stage with Benny Johnson and saying, all right, are we ready to rock?
	I did that at the beginning of this site and spent a fucking fortune getting Dinesh D'Souza and Michael Sherman in the same room.
	But I'd rather just have my Michelle Malkins and my Ann Coulters that will happily call me back and hang out.
	It's higher quality.
	And I really did have an epiphany at AFPAC.
	Like seeing those thousand people in that room that were totally 100% unaffected by any accusations of bigotry or racism.
	They didn't give a fuck about that.
	And my generation, Gen X, is just so worried about it.
	More than boomers.
	I don't know.
	I don't think it's us.
	Well, not you and I, but generally, Gen Xers and young boomers are just still constantly tripping over themselves.
	And I'm done.
	I'm done.
	Yeah, I'm with you.
	I'm with you.
	The only thing I'm saying is, like, I'm the same way.
	I mean, I don't need to give you whole backs through here or anything, but like, you do you.
	That's always kind of been, you know, I think most Americans kind of agree with that.
	Like, hey, you do what you want to do.
	What you do in your bedroom, what you do in your house, that's fine.
	I don't care.
	Don't push it on me.
	Don't push it on my kids.
	But at some point, like, I think that's got us into trouble, though, by not, I don't know.
	We live in a society that rewards aggression and violence.
	And when you are diminutive and submissive, people don't reward you.
	You're punished for that.
	So even like six months ago, I'm writing this book right now.
	There's a burden.
	And I did a whole chapter on 10 things I hate about the Jews and how it's been misinterpreted and I love the Jews and I'm a Zionist and blah, blah, blah.
	And it's like, it's one of like 13 chapters.
	Like, why is it taking up almost 10% of this book?
	So I just went back in and I was just like, look, this was a funny video, blah, blah, blah.
	And, you know, there is some problems with that group and some problems with anti-Semites.
	And I cut it down to like a tenth of its size because I'm sick of apologizing and overexplaining everything.
	I did a funny video that had an offensive title.
	Go fuck yourself.
	Do you want to get into anti-Semitism?
	Okay, I'll have a discussion with you about it.
	But this whole like, please, please, I didn't mean that.
	It's so fucking boring.
	I agree.
	Couldn't agree more, actually.
	And, you know, there's a ton of kids out there ready to be adopted.
	That's my stance on it.
	Like, Dave and his husband had other options to get kids.
	I just think it's kind of a bastardizing.
	My wife and I have the same arguments, and we're right, and they're wrong.
	These gays are creating designer babies from scratch that were not there before.
	You know, these same fuckers argue about rescue dogs and say, don't get a purebred, get a rescue dog.
	Except when it comes to humans, then spend 30 grand and get yourself a perfect little white cherub because we all are secretly into eugenics when you lie about it.
	I'm supposed to adopt a baby.
	Because birth of our semen is just as important as the other.
	Yeah, fuck them.
	All right.
	Thanks for calling, buddy.
	You're starting a kid at a disadvantage.
	Now, you know, when this topic becomes philosophically uncomfortable, what about the deaf and the blind?
	Should deaf people make babies knowing the kid will be deaf?
	You're knowingly starting a kid off with a disadvantage.
	What about midgets?
	Should they be breeding?
	Of course I can.
	But you're starting a kid off with a disadvantage.
	You never seen the little people show?
	Most parents are small and they have regular children.
	Yeah.
	I'm just asking the question.
	I'm not saying.
	Did Helen Keller have kids?
	What?
	Did Helen Keller have kids?
	I don't know.
	Can you fuck her without raping her?
	You know my kids' generation.
	I used to torture her.
	I say, go put her in a round room.
	Tell her to go stand in the corner.
	My kids' generation don't believe in Helen Keller.
	Never married or have children, no.
	Okay.
	She almost married Peter Fagg?
	Is that guy's name Peter Fagg?
	Peter Fagan.
	Oh, Fagan.
	Yeah, people think that her handler was just parading around and faking her, like teaching her to seem smart.
	That's a theory.
	It's a conspiracy theory.
	But I know people that were deaf mutes that had kids.
	Deaf mutes.
	Are you more likely to pass it on?
	No, the children were good.
	Huh.
	Yeah, so that's fine.
	But with a midget.
	The odds are like, I don't know what they are.
	One in five, you're going to make another midget.
	Because my argument with single mothers having kids without the baby daddy around is, fuck you, you knowingly started a kid off with a major disadvantage.
	My problem with gays adopting when they're not just repairing a lonely kid but making one from scratch is, fuck you, you're starting a kid off with a major disadvantage, which is not having a male and female parent.
	So couldn't you make the same argument about deaf people and midgets?
	Or what about Ryan?
	He made, he's ugly and he knowingly made a baby.
	Now it happened to be cute.
	He's a mutt.
	But what if it were turned out as ugly as him?
	The rescue.
	I disagree.
	Well, if Ryan were a toad.
	If I were to be a toad.
	Do you want to watch one final video?
	It sounds pretty funny.
	Who's saying this?
	Ryan is sick because he doesn't have a path.
	He's going to ran away when he found a USA.
	Wait, what kind of mutiny is this?
	We don't usually do final videos on Thursdays.
	It's a fun mutiny.
	Mutiny on the belly?
	Ryan has hijacked the show, folks.
	Holy shit.
	Whoa.
	Well, I was going to make a pirate reference, but then I know you hate pirates.
	I hate pirates.
	I bought for my new Jag.
	I bought cassettes on eBay.
	I bought License to Ill.
	And then there's that song that's all about Mutiny on the Bell is what we're all about.
	And I'm like, shut up, fucking.
	Well, here's one, since you hate fucking pirate jokes.
	What's the pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet?
	R. No, you think it would be an R, but it's the C. And you could always do it backwards if they do that.
	Yeah.
	If they say C. So I haven't seen this yet, but it looks funny.
	You haven't seen it, but it looks funny.
	Yes.
	Oh, this is a fucking ancient Chinese secret.
	This is from three years ago, dude.
	He gets on the thing and he smashes headfirst into the water.
	We're at the San Diego Yacht and Boat Show.
	Good morning, everybody.
	I'm hanging out with my friend John.
	Fox Five Morning News starts.
	Look over there.
	And it starts right now.
	We're at the San Diego.
	Okay, oops.
	Wow, Ryan.
	So did you watch the video first?
	He's going to look good, though.
	It looked good.
	It looked good, but you didn't look at it.
	Yeah.
	You hijacked the show.
	You stuck a final video in.
	People are waiting online to call.
	And you put up a shitty - it's not even the full version of the video.
	Oops.
	You just explosive diarrhea all over the show.
	I had faith in it.
	You've heard me tell you.
	You know what they...
	Faith?
	Why have faith?
	You could have looked at the video in your own time.
	How's that faith working out for you?
	Do we have dinosaurs or not?
	See this terrible video that you can't even see what's going on.
	I can't even see it.
	It falls off a boat, obviously.
	It's out of there.
	It's done.
	What do you mean it's done?
	It's an NFT?
	We can't see it again?
	It's a non-fungible token.
	It dissolved, my friend John.
	Fox 5 Morning News starts.
	Look over there.
	And it starts right now.
	I almost died on one of those.
	A boat?
	No.
	No, a TV show.
	Oh.
	A microphone.
	Weekly.
	No.
	One of those.
	An awkward wasted time.
	Excuse you.
	No, one of those jetpacks.
	Oh, yes.
	Why?
	What happened?
	You went in and started going down and down and down?
	Yeah, so Hodge used to do videos for Action Park, and I did a commercial for them.
	I did a training video for them.
	That was a long time ago.
	Those things must have just come out.
	They just came out.
	So you have these things, and you could turn them up and turn them down, and you can turn them all over the place, frankly.
	You really could.
	And you just couldn't make turns.
	Just couldn't make the turns.
	That's a really bad jump on purpose.
	So fucking, I'm in the thing, and I have an ear set on with a helmet, and I'm like, you're bogged down.
	You know, you're just like here.
	So you're almost drowning just to start.
	And the guy's in the ear.
	He's like, all right, you're going to want to turn the jets up?
	And I'm like, I turned him up.
	And then like I start sinking because now the weight shifted.
	So my face is there and I can't get like swim out of it.
	My fucking face is down here.
	And he hasn't hit the jets.
	If you hit the jets, I'm going up in the air.
	He just hasn't done it yet.
	So I'm just like for 10 seconds underwater panicking.
	And I'm like, this is how I die.
	This is how I fucking die.
	And then the fucking lifeguard lady didn't even jump in.
	And he finally starts the jets up.
	And now I'm flying in the air like an awesome guy.
	But I mean, it was like I'm going to die.
	The two times I was going to die with Hodge.
	The fucking...
	Wait, 10 seconds having to hold your breath?
	This is like yesterday where you go, sorry, man.
	I only slept seven hours less than a day.
	Okay, picture you don't see any way out of drowning.
	Was it in a pond or a pool?
	It was in a pool.
	Definitely weren't dying.
	It was a drowning fear.
	Maybe it was more than 10 seconds, but there was no way to get your head up at all.
	Like, you couldn't even like.
	I wish she did die that day.
	But how did you not have control of the thrusters?
	Exactly.
	Yeah.
	That's not in my control.
	That was entertaining for him.
	Pushing the gas.
	Yeah.
	He was playing a video game with you through the game.
	And he was losing.
	All right.
	Well, let's do one more call.
	All right.
	Is there one more call?
	Yep.
	Let's see.
	This guy is talking about Zach's card.
	I don't think that's accurate.
	607.
	Go ahead, call it.
	Hey, I have a question for Gav.
	Okay.
	What did the vax cards?
	You think it's alright to fake one?
	One more time?
	You sound like you're calling from the show MASH.
	I think you said something about Space Force?
	Vax cards.
	Oh, vax cards.
	What do we think about the vax cards?
	Is it safe to fake them?
	Yeah, would it be all right to fake one of those?
	You don't need them anywhere here.
	Well, this is a litigiously complex question to answer on a public forum wherein.
	All right, if you were playing Minecraft.
	Oh, and Minecraft?
	Well, that's different.
	Well, we all take risks, sir.
	Some do, some don't.
	Sometimes they pay off, sometimes they don't.
	Anyway, thanks for calling.
	I don't discuss the pros and cons of illegal activity.
	I think anywhere in New York now needs them.
	I think the dane...
	No, no, you're right.
	But there's some private places that have to do whatever they want.
	Like some restaurants, they'll be like, we still do the vax checks.
	Although I was in a...
	No, in New York State, there's not even government buildings.
	The only place you need is a hospital.
	We checked someplace and they were like, for certain restaurants or private businesses, they can still do that.
	And they do anyway.
	Which is shitty.
	But I think the comes outweighed the business.
	Last message.
	Proposed to my girlfriend last weekend.
	That's awesome.
	We want to know how much to have Ryan perform at the wedding.
	You want to get divorced the day you get married?
	Yeah.
	Her special day.
	There will be highs.
	There will be lows.
	There will be lows.
	All his YouTube hits.
	It will be April 2023.
	I'll have his Peter Franz YouTube.
	I bet.
	Ryan isn't good at this kind of thing.
	He'll just be like either $1 or a million dollars.
	So here's the deal.
	If it's within the New York area, like within a two-hour drive, he'd do it for $100, maybe $200.
	He'd be thrilled to do it.
	And then free food?
	Free food and everything.
	Well, you clearly can spend $500, so let's do $500.
	But that would include his travel and everything like that.
	He'd have to pay for his own gas to get there.
	If it's like in L.A., I think it should go up to $1,000.
	And they should pay your hotel and your air.
	Everything per diem.
	Food and stuff for the day.
	You don't want to fucking fly to L.A. for $500.
	That's true.
	It's going to be two days out of your life.
	If you were to do it per hour, right, from me leaving my house, playing the music, da-da-da-da-da, coming back home.
	If you counted up all those hours, I'm probably making like five bucks an hour.
	So that's no good.
	But I don't know.
	You could record it, Ryan.
	Maybe that could become your new little side project.
	Well, I am playing some gigs.
	Got some gigs coming up.
	Are you allowed to say them?
	Yes.
	What do you think the average wedding band gets played?
	He's playing like a...
	Ryan's playing an incel Doom concert.
	It's like, remember Incel Fest that happened in Georgia?
	Yep.
	It's like a sequel to that.
	It's the third, you know, one of those.
	Great, and you're playing at it.
	With Hollowed, yeah, I'm playing bass.
	Hollowed is playing.
	There's definitely no chance of anyone getting laid.
	Well, no, no, but that's not.
	No, that's not.
	No, no.
	Well, the first one was called Virgin Fest.
	So, yeah, they fancy the best.
	Fucking not big on their parties.
	By choice, guys.
	By choice.
	Thanks for tuning in.
	This was a fun show.
	Get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.
	But it is what it is.
	That's a feeling it hung.
	So what you want to do, what you are.
	Cause I'm meaning alone.
	But you said, but you said I couldn't come over.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.

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