All Episodes
Previous Next
April 15, 2022 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes
46:36
GOML LIVE #144 - BAD COP (Part 1)

From a real bad shooting in Grand Rapids, Michigan to cochlear implants, Coca-Cola, and squirrels playing basketball.

| Copy link to current segment

Time Text
Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with
Gavin McInnes. .
Bye bye!
Home to Mommy!
This is Al Jorgensen of Ministry and Ian McKay of Minor Threat.
We'll wait till the good part comes.
Oh, now we've got to wait for the whole other part to come.
We'll wait till the good part comes.
This is back before Al Jorgensen became an embarrassing parody of himself.
Look at the new setup with Matty.
Welcome back.
Hey, what's up there everybody?
Matty O'Dell is back, folks.
Good to be in the house?
I don't know why we didn't have that angle before.
It's much more appealing.
You excited?
I'm excited.
Gotta check it.
The cool parts comes.
Have faith.
I'm fucking ready.
Please don't ask me.
I will reach you.
Oh, yeah.
Great jam.
And then Al Jorgensen, Ian McKay's aged well.
You know, he did Fugazi, that was his sort of second act, like Pill was John Lydon's second act.
But then Al Jorgensen became this fucking cringe industrial dude who did We Are Antifa.
Where he's bald as a cue ball but his dreads start like, his hairline starts here.
So he's got a bandana on and then he's got a bunch of embarrassing facial piercings and facial tattoos.
I think even Antifa said, uh, you're bad for the brand, Al.
You're embarrassing us.
Do you have that song?
Do you remember that?
Oh, God, it's so embarrassing.
I was really happy when it came out because it was so bad for them.
It was like that Proud Boys song those two guys did when the club first started.
They were like, Uhuru, Uhuru, Uhuru, we're a Proud Boy.
It was that embarrassing.
Look at this thing.
Ooh.
Oh, I guess his symbol is AA because it's Anarchy and Al.
Hi, I'm Anarchy Al.
I wonder what Antifa thinks of this.
I wonder if there's any cool Antifa dudes who are not retarded rich kids who think the world's racist.
There's got to be one or two, right?
Here, jump to the middle.
I want to see Al.
Come on, Al.
I guess if you're listening to the audio version of this... Oh, maybe he was smart enough to know to keep his weird face out of this.
There he is.
The Klan.
The Klan is coming for you.
You-hoo-roo.
You, you, you, Guru.
You have hurt me today.
I still don't know if that's a joke or not.
Oh, I think it's a joke.
What percentage?
I'm like 56% sure.
What percentage of it is a joke?
Are we supposed to read beard vet today?
Are we supposed to reared bead vet?
Vince didn't send us the shit.
That's stupid.
He sent me the thing.
Retarded sales dude that we have.
Yeah, that guy.
You know the thing.
- The President. - I know that Nita Fashions is a sponsor this week, and we'll start with that.
As you know, folks, this is free for the first half hour, then we go behind the paywall, and the reason it's free for the first half hour, the fine sponsors of Get Off My Lawn, including Nita Fashions, your own custom tailors, made in Hong Kong by Indians who are like third generation, and the craft made in Hong Kong by Indians who are like third generation, and the craft of being It's not really around much in America.
If you find someone like here in New York, you're gonna spend five grand.
These guys will...
Barf out a suit for you for 800 bucks, 900 bucks.
It's for cheap rich guys.
It was introduced to me by a cheap rich guy and they travel around the world meeting you in hotels.
They measure you up.
You check the swaths.
It's really fun.
It's the male equivalent of a spa.
And you choose a bunch of shirts.
You could go super cheap.
You could go $50 shirts, $700 suit.
And now, say you're a plumber, and you only wear a suit once a year for weddings and funerals.
Bang.
You have a perfect suit.
There's nothing more embarrassing than a grown man with a suit where it goes down to his knuckles.
The sleeves go down to his knuckles.
And then the shirt's too small, so he has to undo the top button.
And you just look like a sad dork who doesn't have his shit together.
You need one suit that fits.
And Nina fashions is that suit now once you get used to it once they have all your shit, too You can just call them up and be like hey throw another shirt in but make it pink Whatever you want monogrammed initials choose the lining Custom suits are something that only the very rich were privy to in the past now You've got them So what I recommend you do is you go to their Instagram account, DM them there.
I mean, there's a million ways to get a hold of them, of course.
You can use their website, Facebook, whatever you want.
But this seems to be the most popular with our subscribers.
Go there, DM them.
They'll set up a meeting, a Zoom meeting.
Your girlfriend measures you with a little measuring tape.
And they have everything now.
Your ankles, your neck, your waist, your belly, your inseam.
And then you go and you get a suit back, and it's the most fantastic fitting thing I've ever worn.
I wear suits pretty much every time you see me on the show, except for Thursday nights.
And when I'm wearing suits, they're Nita Fashions.
And they say Gavin McInnes on the inside.
Isn't that cool?
Isn't that awesome?
Have they been posting regularly?
I think the last one was a little bit ago.
Look at those gorgeous gentlemen.
Breathtaking.
I'm gay when I see these pictures.
So yeah, when you contact me into fashions, of course, make sure to say that, uh, get off my lawn.
Gavin sent you and you'll get a discount.
I mean, it's, it's, it's not as simple as 15%.
They'll just throw you a bone, but it's a cool, fun thing to do.
And there's nothing like having at least one suit.
I always thought that my boys would take my suits after I died.
They're just going to throw them in the garbage.
Enjoy your shit while you have it.
Enjoy your custom suit.
That's the owner's son.
He's taking on the family business.
You know when they came back from their last time in New York, they had to stay in a hotel room for three weeks on their dime.
And they could only eat room service.
They couldn't leave.
So the room service would drop their food at their door and then they would open it and close the fucking door.
That's crazy.
That's insane.
Insane.
Hong Kong is very Chinese.
They say it's not China.
It's China.
Oh yeah.
It's fucking China.
What are you doing over there?
Okay.
Why would I be unfocused?
And why am I darker than Matty?
He's a white nigga.
I'm a brother.
I'm Polynesian.
My wife's American Indian, I should be darker than him.
I was at the gym once, this is another gym, a gym in Manhattan.
It was Church Street Boxing Gym.
And this one guy was like, yo, yo, I'm Puerto Rican, this girl, they love that island flavor, man.
There's two black guys.
The ladies love that island flavor.
He's like, yeah, my wife, no, my sister, she just married a Dominican.
We got that in our family too now, man.
Island Boys.
Do you think that a big, your family's a big bowl of water and when someone puts two drops in it anywhere everyone becomes Dominican?
Yeah?
No.
Doesn't work that way?
No.
Is that a big melting pot?
Sorry.
You don't suddenly turn brown when your sister marries a fucking Dominican.
Speaking of the island boys, I'm glad you brought that up.
There's a new island boy.
One for.
There's two new island boys.
And I gotta be frank.
They suck.
It's very simple.
If you want to be an island boy, your dreads have to be as thick as cigars and they have to stick up like a birthday cake that just got fired.
Yeah.
And when you're talking, it's very simple.
There's no real variations on the theme.
I'm an island boy.
I got the Budweiser.
I'm doing a vidcast show.
It's like a TV show.
We're on the sensitive TV because I'm an island.
Bring it back to island boy.
That's it.
That's all you got to do.
But the Mexican and the Black are ruining it.
I don't know what race the original Island Boys are.
Or class, or anything really.
Like, they have about a thousand dollars worth of torso tattoos.
Their entire backs and chests and arms.
Well, way more than that.
They got their legs and their... No, I was just saying that's the... Oh, more than a thousand bucks.
Way, way a lot more money than that.
That's like people who work at tattoo studios look like that.
I wonder how they... When you go for like big sessions, you're paying at least 150 bucks an hour?
Yeah.
You're right.
And that's like 30 hours on a back, 30 hours on the front.
You got some time sitting there.
You have that, yeah.
They definitely did a bunch of painkillers.
What's this?
Apparently Cuban.
Cuban, yeah, that makes sense.
Brought it from Cuba.
So that's an island.
They are island boys.
Anyway, check out their new, their new staff.
Look, we all island boys and we just trying to make it.
All we some island boys.
We just so trying to make it.
I put my teflon, yeah.
With my old bed stone, yeah.
We all some island boys.
We all just trying to make it.
We trying to eat milkshakes.
We trying to be out chilling.
We live that island boy lifestyle.
That's why we go all back.
We still go slip and slide, yeah.
We just some island boys and we just trying to make it.
Immediately bad.
Boop, dong, gong.
Yeah, where's the gong show?
Where's Richard Barron?
BONG!
No, no, no.
You're out of here, kid.
Island Boys!
And the second guy, he does two different ones.
He does Island Boys, a do-do-do-do-do.
But he also goes, Island Boys, we got the doodlad to do.
So, you can do either of those.
But you gotta get the basic spine of Island Boy.
I think I'd take it back.
I think he's got his own thing.
The second guy?
The new guy.
Oh, you're supporting the Mexican.
I think he's... otherwise he'd be copying their Steve.
So his own Steve's like, you know... Dude, if you just joined the Ramones and you start going, hey-dee, hey-dee, let's go guys!
Like, at least wait a year.
That sounds cool.
Let's go.
You gotta fucking blend in first, don't you?
Maybe I'm wrong.
I feel like he's not representing the brand.
And, okay, if you were gonna do something, be like, I'm an island, island, island boy!
You know, something I hadn't thought of.
But this is just island boys, but lackluster.
Yeah, he's not into it.
He's nervous.
It's quiet.
It's quiet for him.
Wow.
That was brutal.
He didn't know what to say.
Holy shit.
- Hey, y'all the third island boy, fourth island boy, what you gotta say? - Hey, say, gangster, stop comparing us.
'Cause that's not the stuff we, y'all stop comparing us. - Wow.
- That was brutal.
- He didn't know what to say.
- Holy shit.
He's the worst island boy in the history of island boys. - Do you think they had tryouts for that?
I mean, don't put that up.
Say like, if I was the main, I feel like the first guy's the main island boy.
So if I'm that island boy, I go, guys, okay, that was a good dry run.
We're obviously not going to post that on social media.
But Mexican guy, I need more volume.
And you, black dude, try to know what you're going to say first.
And also it's got to include island boy.
Now I'm more impressed with the original guys because they're so good at it.
Yeah.
What's he got to say?
This is his story.
What's a day in their life like?
He's worried about showing his grills.
Dad's gotta be a drug dealer, right?
That's a different island, boy.
What island?
I guess Haiti.
Or Madagascar.
Oh, this is fascinating.
Yeah, now go to their main page.
Oh, speaking of which... Oh yeah, so they're on Cameo, and so is Ryan.
Ya boi!
I'm on Cameo, so if you wanna sign up, I'll do Trump for ya, I'll do Ronald Downey Jr.
Ronald Downey Jr.
Who's Ronald Downey Jr.?
I don't know.
You're like the Fifth Island boy.
Robert Downey Jr.
He's Aluminum Man.
Jarvis?
And you're following the pattern of sucking.
Correct.
Who's Jarvis, who's Donald Downey Jr.?
Jarvis, who's Donald Downey Jr.?
Yeah, so I'll do the voices.
How do people find you?
You're Ryan Katsu Rivera?
Yeah, Cameo.com slash Ryan Katsu Rivera.
And how many have you done?
Can we see one of them?
Seven of them.
Let's see.
Happy birthday!
Wait, are you Trump?
I do Trump, I do... Bye bye!
Home to Mommy!
That is loud, man.
Baby!
I don't think I've ever done anything that loud.
In your life?
Yeah.
I just tried, and it failed.
Oh, I guess they do show the ones I did on there.
There's Jordan Peterson.
He's been popular.
You know, people ask me all the time, they're like, what's the most important thing in life?
It's like, well, wow.
Like, that's a crazy question.
It's like, I don't even know if I could begin to answer that satisfactorily.
It's like, well, you could bloody have fun.
That's probably the most important.
And they're like, well, how do you do it?
Do you go on vacation?
Do you, like, go for walks?
It's like, no.
You sign up for Cody Canuck's Patreon.
You support him.
This was a business call.
Because he brings laughter to people.
Oh.
So that wasn't a... It's not a cameo?
It is a cameo, but this was for, um... Like, you could do it for advertisements, like, uh... Wait, what are advertisements?
You emphasize the ties in advertisements?
Advertisements.
Police.
Advertisements.
It's advertisements.
Advertisements.
Really?
Fudge.
Advertisements?
Yeah, I guess I pronounced that wrong.
Do you read magazines?
No, but I get souvenirs.
What?
My wife makes fun of me because I say silver in ears.
But it's like, that's pretty close.
Well back home in Scotland they just call them adverts.
Adverts.
There we go.
Um, I need to focus you again.
Could you stand up in the middle of the camera shot?
I'm gonna zoom in and we're gonna hammer this out.
It's gonna be dirty, but we gotta do it.
Okay?
It's hard to do, um, with this little screen, let's assume.
Folks listening to the audio.
Also in the news.
Remember when we were... I don't know if I've talked about this on the show yet.
I've been away.
By the way, it's spring break.
I went away with my kids.
We went to Jersey Shore.
Is that allowed?
God, everyone gets so pissed off.
Fuck you.
I've been subbing since 1970.
You're dead to me.
I gave you content every day.
That's the only deal we have is content every day.
But anyway, remember when we got that Coke?
And I went, oh, it's a paper straw.
Yako's hot dogs suck.
Fuck this place.
I threw it out the window.
Their cola, the pipes are rotten.
Then I'm in Jersey Shore, a different state.
We were in Maryland when we had that.
This is New Jersey.
Same shit.
Then I have a can of Coke here in New York City.
Guess what?
Same gross chemical, Tide Pod, tampon, CVS, really medicine-y.
The aftertaste is brutal.
It's like castor oil.
Fucking COVID ruined Coca-Cola for me for the rest of my life.
That's a good thing.
Too much sugar.
I wasn't a big Coca-Cola guy, but it's nice with Chinese food.
Yeah.
Or if you're hungover at lunch, very, you know, once a month you have a Coca-Cola.
How about meat?
Does meat taste the same?
Meat's been pretty good.
Why?
Is meat ruined for you?
When I, when I did have my anosmia, that was one of the things that like anything.
Oh, and I'm sorry, porosmia.
Porosmia is when you smell things differently, anosmia is when you lose your smell.
And so when I had the mixed up smells, food would taste bad, like spoiled dirt.
Coca-Cola, I like, beer tastes good, thank God.
Can we get more mad at, not Chinese Americans, obviously, you morons.
China!
China!
Chinese Americans hate China, by the way.
When you see a Chinese person in America, give them a high five, they got out of that shithole.
But China?
Fuck you.
Fuck you, Islam.
Because I have to take my shoes off every time I go to the airport.
And fuck you, China.
Because I can't enjoy a Coca-Cola anymore.
But why are white supremacists always listed as the number one bad guys?
They didn't affect my cola.
Or my shoes.
Fucking dicks.
I'm pissed off about it.
By the way, I highly don't recommend going to the Jersey Shore in April.
Off-season.
It was so cold that like we would come out of the hotel and I was trying to sign up for those little scooters just to take the kids on.
You'd have to go in back into the hotel to type it out because if you didn't have an arctic parka on you were freezing to death.
It was 43 but it felt like zero.
And then my wife, she gets this hotel that's right, you know, like the Stone Pony and Asprey Park, Bruce Springsteen, all that stuff where all the concerts are.
So she gets it at a concert venue.
We're in a room with eight bunks and nothing else, like army barracks.
It's for teenagers who don't want to drive drunk, I guess.
And they just go there and pass out and puke and shit themselves.
Nice.
That's what we were in.
Weirdest vacation ever.
Kind of like a hostel.
She might be going senile.
The other day she took out $200 from the bank machine and left it in the thing.
I've done that.
Really?
You know the bank gave her the money back?
Yeah, after a while the machine will track the money.
Oh really?
Yeah.
Like it just won't stay there.
I say almost for the same amount.
I was drunk.
I was in Arkansas.
I was on my bike, and uh, I said I gotta stop the ATM, so I pulled up, spit the money out, and I took my debit card, I put it back in there, I put my wallet in, like, my little tank bag, and I just fucking drove off and left the money there.
I was like, I'm a fucking idiot!
But I went back, and the money wasn't there, I was like, aw, someone took it, but then, yeah, I had to, like, call the bank, and they said, no, the machine took the money back in, and I'm like... Oh, they must come across that a hundred times.
Oh, sure.
Maybe if I wasn't drunk and riding, who knows?
Another embarrassing thing I want to talk about, and I'm ashamed to admit this, but The Thing About Pam might be the greatest television show I've ever seen.
The Thing About Pam?
It is up there with White Lotus, Sopranos, everything.
What's it on?
You know how I gauge how good a show is?
If I'm dreading the clock.
Like I DVR it.
So I fast forward the commercials and I go, oh no, is it over?
Is it over?
Is it over?
And then I open one eye as I'm fast forwarding and realize, oh no, I have 20 minutes left.
Thank you, God.
There's 20 more minutes.
It's a true story about this woman who murdered her best friend to get the money because she convinced the best friend to give her her inheritance.
She said, I'll put in a trust for your daughters.
I'm really good at money managing.
She's been on plastic surgery.
Renny Zellweger plays the woman.
She's wearing a fat suit and makeup.
You know, the prosthetic shit to look fat.
100% true story.
They've ripped it from the headlines.
They actually perfectly mimic certain scenes we have on video, this bitch.
And what she does is she keeps digging a deeper and deeper hole.
She almost gets away with it.
The first murder.
Because the D.A.
Yeah.
She's a serial killer.
Yes.
The DA, but not really.
She did like two.
The DA and the judge were high school friends.
So these two girls, who are now in the justice system, bury all this evidence to make sure this guy Ross, that guy crying, goes to prison for life.
And he did.
Until two years later, he's exonerated because they found out that they destroyed evidence.
These women destroyed evidence.
In other words, women generally don't belong in the workforce.
Devious.
So there's weird shit going on here, like she's been stabbed about 50 times.
Okay, where's the blood?
Well, there's no blood because she had been strangled to death.
So the heart's not beating.
And gayest thing I've said this year, Renée Zellweger is a national treasure.
What an actress.
I could not get enough of her.
That's her there?
That's her there.
Turn it up.
I want you to admit to something you didn't do.
I can't do that.
I'm not that kind of person.
You don't know who I am.
I'm a businesswoman.
I do business all the time.
Flip houses, turn a profit.
I'm real successful.
I'm a pillar of the community and other stuff too.
A loving family woman.
My husband, Mark, he thinks I'm a hoot.
That's another thing.
It's shot kind of weird.
Like this.
Yeah, it's like camping.
Cheesy.
Yeah, and here's another weird part.
This was big on Dateline when it really happened in real life.
And the guy who narrated the original Dateline, you know that guy who talks to you like he's reading a bedtime story?
Mike Rowe?
Matty wasn't sure if he was gonna make it home.
He'd been home many times before, but would this night be different?
Would he pull into his driveway in his truck or would things turn out for the worse?
That guy.
That's Curtis.
Keith Morrison.
He was also the singer I guess in the Circle Jerks.
And so he's narrating it but he's kind of making fun of himself.
He's so fucking weird.
Mommy doomsday.
The investigation has been going on and still going on up to this moment and will continue.
We thought this was a good time to step in with the podcast because we have learned a great deal over the last year.
You know, the basic facts... Yeah, that's not how he talks, Ryan.
...turn out to be forever.
Although he does his weird bedtime story thing.
This goodbye... There you go.
...would turn out to be forever.
So it's really camp.
I'm sure our female subs will be very happy.
Female baby monsters will be happy that I brought this up and we can all high-five and I'll goof with the gals later on when we take calls.
But yes, even dudes.
I said it to Anthony Cumia.
You know what I've been saying to people?
I've been saying, I'll pay you minimum wage if you hate it.
Fifteen bucks an hour.
You put an hour into it, and you are not happy.
I owe you fifteen bucks, but you need to do more than one episode.
Because it really gets its legs after the first episode.
And that's Katie Dixon, the chick from Eastbound and Down.
So it's only like a mini-series.
Yeah, it's only four or five episodes.
Four episodes, yeah.
I like those.
It's so fucking good!
I like a good finite tense thing.
Is it like Fargo?
You ever see Fargo the TV series?
Exactly like Fargo.
Awesome.
Well, I'm in.
And you know what?
The wife will probably fall for it because she bailed out of Fargo because it was a little too violent and tense.
But this has so many broads in it.
Well, the problem with your wife is, and any woman, it's fucking gross at the beginning.
Like there's a woman stabbed to death.
Yeah, she won't like that.
Well, it happens.
In fact, I was watching it with my daughter and she kind of peaced out.
It's on NBC though, I mean.
Right.
Well, they're going to have a thing on this Friday where they talk about the making of and they're going to show the real Pam, who's in prison now for life.
The real killer.
Oh, I just gave away the ending.
Sorry.
You could have Googled it.
Um, we're about to take some calls.
We've got a lot of mail saved up.
I went through all the mail.
So it's only going to be winners.
And then of course we have the live chat where the money no longer goes to Joe Biggs.
Right?
Let's go back to Max and John.
They're going to be, we're going to be out in a year and they're going to need a nest egg.
Oh, you know who else we should talk about?
Nick Ox.
He's got a give, send, go that I promised him I would mention.
He's a good guy, man.
It's amazing how many of these fucking Proud Boys are going to court.
Andy Walls, the gay guy who's accused of a racist hate crime, although when the media found out that he was gay, this dropped.
What's he at now?
I can't see, it's behind the camera.
8,000.
8,000, that's pretty much.
- Well, close to nine. - 11%.
He committed the horrific crime of wandering into the Capitol.
And you know what's coming out in a lot of these cases?
We're seeing cops go like this and we're seeing cops, there's a mob by the door, they turn around and they walk into the building.
Why would you turn your back to someone as a cop that you see as a threat?
So, I'm saying, this is the mob, right?
Hey, you guys, what are you doing?
What the hell's going on?
We're not gonna hurt anything, we just wanna see inside.
If I go like this, and I'm walking, I'm escorting you in.
Like, what if you go to a police station, and the cops say, you're not supposed to be in here.
And you go, really?
I wanna be in here.
And they turn around and walk with their back to you.
That means, come on in.
Subjective.
I know what that means that with sex, if a lady, if you walk a lady home and she opens her door and then she walks into her bedroom without turning around, you're getting laid my friend.
That's the universal sign for you're in.
You're getting Liz-aid.
That's one thing I miss about being single, was the sex was great and everything, but knowing that you're in.
When she's like, are you coming upstairs?
Just walking through that door, you were like, you could almost turn around at that point.
Another notch on the bedpost.
I could have got laid.
I'm leaving.
Maybe I'll do that as a married man.
I'll just get women to admit they'd have sex with me.
So you wanna fuck me right now, right?
Yeah?
Okay, ha ha.
I'm leaving.
Gotta go.
Bye.
So throw the hunt.
Throw the hunt.
I'm gonna fuck ya.
BeardVet is a veteran-owned company.
Stay warm and caffeinated with BeardVet Coffee.
And stay looking great with BeardVet Beard Grooming Equipment.
BeardVet has a great beard grooming products and coffee.
Check out our exclusive GML discount at BeardVet.com with promo code GAVIN.
15% off all orders.
BeardVet has the El Diablo Coffee Blend.
Brazilian Roast Blend.
And they're all on sale with the promo code GAVIN.
And, of course, free shipping on all orders when you go to BeardVet.com.
Promo code GAVIN.
Sean, the owner of BeardVet, is one of us.
He's a good egg and we like him more than a friend, says our ad copy guy.
Like most of our sponsors, BeardVet is a veteran-owned and operated company.
BeardVet stands for the National Anthem, BeardVet kneels to the cross, and BeardVet's charitable contribution to help our brothers and sisters in uniform.
We support them, they support us.
Treat yourself to some excellent coffee and grooming gear.
That's BeardVet.com.
Grooming gear is probably not a good thing to say in this day and age with all these OK Groomer memes going around.
Beard grooming, not child grooming.
Beard grooming.
That's BeardVet.com, promo code Gavin, 50% off.
And then we're told that Caller 1 and 2 are getting a free gift, but is that for today?
Are we March 14th today?
No, we are April 14th.
Oh, yeah.
January, February, March.
Oh, yeah.
So, yeah.
Caller 1 and Caller 2 are getting a free gift pack from Sean and the BeardVet team.
Alrighty.
Oh, I also we got to do Johnny Apple CBD, but let's get to that in a second.
Did they figure out the name issue?
The rebranding?
Yeah.
Just checking.
We're ignoring that update.
I love the relationship between us and that guy, I gotta say it.
It's just, it's fun to have a guy where, you know what, it probably is, because I'm just, I'm always fucking up and getting shit, that when there's somebody else fucking up and getting shit, I could just enjoy it.
He fucks up alright.
I'm so thankful.
So who do we got in jail now?
Obviously we have Max and John.
That's easy, they've got one year left.
We have Ethan Nordean and Joe Biggs getting crucified for January 6th.
We have Nick Aux, who's free to go now.
He's not in prison, but he's facing serious... It's looking like 3-5 for him.
For the ridiculous charge of trespassing.
Did you hear about this woman?
Look at 1-9.
She's lying with her newborn in bed.
The feds kick down her door.
Huge line of sirens and cops and SWAT all on her rural road.
And they grab her.
They handcuff her.
She gives her baby to her aunt.
They tell her she's looking at 30 years.
She's in jail now awaiting trial for marching with Proud Boys on January 6.
I don't even know if she went into the Capitol.
Right.
Yeah, they said they thought she was a proud boy.
Well, she said, what am I doing here?
And the FBI said to her, you're a proud boy!
You know what's weird?
She's like, I'm a girl.
You know, so in the, when she was in the prison, she saw her brother there and they were like, is that your husband?
She's like, no, that's my brother.
She saw her brother there.
And on the car ride there, she was like, the FBI, this is what sucks.
They're just doing their jobs or whatever.
You know, it's like, they can't cancel doing this.
They can't be like, I know it's bullshit, but come out.
She was like, let me get ready.
And they were like, no, now.
So without even getting ready, she just went.
What are you getting this from?
Uh, this article.
No, the aunt said she's gonna get ready.
And then the girl said, no, now.
This is serious, aunt.
Oh, I misread that.
So then in the car, she's kind of warming up to the guys and she's like, this music sucks.
And the FBI guys are like, They're like, what do you want to hear?
And she's like, proud to be an American.
Or Toby Keith.
Courtesy of the Red White.
Yeah, courtesy of the Red White.
Wow, you're great at reciting this article.
Thank you.
And in prison, they called her the songbird.
She sings for all the people, the national anthem and stuff like that.
And interesting chick, right?
She got into a car accident, almost died.
Yeah, yeah.
So she's looking at 30 years.
That means the state would take her baby away.
In other words, if you protest the state, they take away your children.
What was she charged with?
Uh, let's find out.
The big charge they're all facing is obstruction of justice, right?
Conspiracy.
For walking next to Proud Boys.
Conspiracy requires evidence of her saying, I'm going to meet you guys and then we're going to march and then we're going to go do this.
So you need to show proof that this was all a big plan.
And where was she?
Where do they, where does she live?
Her farmhouse can tell.
Is this written by a woman?
No, Randy Ireland.
Wait, we know that guy, right?
Sounds familiar.
Yeah, I think he's the guy who tries to raise money.
Go down?
Whoa, it says New York Proud Boys leader.
Wait, that can't be right.
Well, Sylvia's calling us.
Oh, that's Randy Ireland.
Oh, that is him.
New York Proud Boys leader Randy Ireland on January 6th.
He's in trouble with this whole thing too.
Yep.
Okay.
But I want to find out where she was.
The bright lights, blah, blah, blah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Guys, number one rule of journalism, who, what, when, where, why?
Let's see, house.
We still don't know where the fuck she is.
Keep going down.
Do-do-do-do-do, keep going, keep going.
I mean, it's not that relevant where exactly it is, but I just need to know.
Keep going.
Jess, she had a horrible car accident.
Okay, Yellowstone National Park.
No, that's where she visited.
She fell in love with lobster rolls in Maine, went to Carolina.
Automatic rifles, yadda, yadda, yadda.
Guy, you didn't even tell us the state she's in.
She's fucking looking good right there.
Yeah, she's hot.
I wouldn't kick her out of bed for eating crackers, that's for sure.
I wouldn't throw her in prison for 30 years for going to a rally.
No, me neither.
So we don't know where she lives.
Hey, she's down with Shania.
That guy.
See the guy in the middle at the top?
I'm trying to say that's you.
You.
That's the New York Times.
Alan Froyer said he had proof that I was there.
And that's his proof.
The guy's like 10 years older than me too.
Isn't that John Sullivan in the top left?
No?
No.
Or the top right?
No.
Yeah.
He looks like a dollar store version of Enrique and that looks like a dollar store version of you.
Yeah.
It was a dollar store version of O'Reilly.
So, I need to find out where she was.
Look up her name.
Yeah, so you just Google her name.
I'm thinking like, I don't know why Indiana's in my head.
Maybe because she was so sassy in the car that she's probably not used to this.
I said this to Ezra today.
I did a big interview with him.
Tucson.
Eastern.
Arizona?
Tucson, yeah.
For Rebel News today.
If you went to MS-13's headquarters and you sat in Al Chapo's main chair, You'd be fucked.
No matter how innocent you were.
Because you've insulted the gang.
And now the gang has to save face.
That's what they did on January 6th.
They insulted the mafia.
And the mafia now doesn't want to look like a bitch.
So they have to over-punish everyone who was there to save face.
Because this isn't a government in a free country.
This is a fucking street gang. 100%.
You violated the laws of gang culture like sitting in Nancy Pelosi's desk you go okay that's ridiculous uh trespassing what is rude no no it's El Chapo's chair that's why this guy was just offered a plea of seven years that guy was offered a plea of seven years he didn't steal anything he didn't grab the laptop he just sat there and went hey he said the police he has footage of the police doing that thing I just showed you where they lead him in and
He said he wanted to get out.
The police wouldn't let him out.
Seven years for that.
What happens is, everyone's got to take that to trial.
Yeah.
They have to.
They have to.
Well, especially when one of the judges said, obstruction of justice?
This wasn't obstruction of justice.
You're free to go.
And then 10 other judges in the same court from the same bench said, no, it is obstruction of justice.
So they should all fucking petition to get their fucking cases assigned to the other judge.
Yeah.
Justice shouldn't work like that.
One judge shouldn't be able to say something definitively as a fact and then the other judges go, not on my watch.
I have a different interpretation.
Yeah.
Well, that's why they have the appeal system.
But.
Speaking of the appeal system, go to 2.0.
I don't want to do a whole My Pet Biden, but I want to see if you guys can translate this because I'm getting really good at speaking Biden.
I feel like how I felt when I first learned French and you get through this point where it's like, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.
And then all of a sudden you hear like, are you guys going to be there on Thursday?
And you go, holy fuck, I can see through the veneer.
I can hear it.
And that's how I feel with Biden.
I feel like I've learned a language.
Don't be fooled by that.
In fact, I would hide that text.
It's not going to help you.
Yeah, he did say prostitute.
I saw this yesterday.
Oh, you did?
Yeah, go ahead and play it.
Okay, play it and see what you guys can do with it.
Prostitution.
We're the only outfit in the country that is immune.
Imagine had the tobacco industry been immune to prostitutes being sued.
Come on.
The prostitute.
In February, the families of nine... So that's what you're guessing?
He does say prostitute.
No, he doesn't.
He meant to say prosecution.
Yeah.
He started to say prosecution.
I think he said prosecute.
And then he realized he's not sure of the tense.
Is it prosecute or prosecution?
I forgot what I started this sentence with.
So I'm gonna abandon prosecution as a word in the middle of the word.
So prosecute to being sued.
Right.
Would you mind getting my phone for me?
Sure.
Try again.
We're the only outfit in the country that is immune.
Imagine had the tobacco industry been immune to prosecute being sued.
Come on.
To prosecute.
In February the families of nine.
I think it's prosecute.
Immune to prosecute.
Or unless he dyslexified prosecution.
Prostitue.
Being sued.
To prosecute being sued.
And he's talking about the NRA because of this thing.
This shooting.
Okay, let's see what Syl has to say.
Hi, Calvin.
Next Saturday I go home.
Next Saturday, meaning in three days or in ten days?
Next Saturday, not this Saturday.
Oh, how are you feeling?
All right, the pain is lessening, but I lost weight.
I weigh 103 pounds.
I don't eat much.
The pain is too much.
I drink a lot of insurance, you know.
But I can walk.
I just gotta take it slow, you know.
And my birthday, I gotta spend Wednesday in rehab.
I'll be 79 years old.
Well, that's a break on Broadway.
I'm just happy the following Saturday I'll be going home and things Yes, well, we look forward to having you back in the studio.
We're live right now, as a matter of fact.
Well, yeah, I can't wait.
I can't wait.
I really miss all of you, you know?
Well, we miss you too, Sylvia.
All right.
Well, you have a wonderful Easter, you know, and be safe.
I will.
Give everyone my love.
Okay, I'll do that.
Okay, ciao.
Bye, sweetie.
Um, speaking of ailments, you may want to try Johnny Apple CBD.
You should.
If you're, uh...
Feeling weak in the knees.
You know what the CBD ointment is good for?
Is sore muscles.
Work out too hard, got a sore arm, feeling it in your lats, in your triquads, in your quadriceps.
Rub some CBD on it.
I don't know, the hemp plant is a magical gift from God.
It just cures you.
You put the tincture in your coffee, it takes the edge off.
You take a gummy right before bed, you sleep like a log.
And have fantastic dreams.
This set has no THC in it.
You're not going to get high.
It's perfectly legal.
Those Delta 8s though.
The Delta 8s feel exactly like THC.
My wife had three of them.
I had to run around like a clown and dance to keep her from freaking out till two in the morning.
That's a different story.
You should take them as the directions are listed on the bottle.
I don't think they want you to have three Delta 8 gummies.
Have a nibble of one and see how it affects you.
But we got, you took the vapes, right?
Oh yeah.
JohnnyApple.com.
Use a promo code GAVIN to get 15% off all orders.
They've been with us since day one, these guys.
Fighting for free speech, supporting the show despite getting constantly attacked by Antifa.
JohnnyApple.com has been there supporting free speech, supporting this show, and supplying the highest quality CBD merchandise from gummies, vape thingamadoodles, tincture, cookies, Ointment?
I mean, the list is endless.
Look at that Johnny Apple dude blowing rings.
Cool, huh?
JohnnyApple.com, promo code Gavin, use it.
Okay, let's take one call and then we'll go behind the paywall.
What do you think of that?
I think that's great.
We got to update your Mets bet.
Oh yeah!
What, you got nothing there?
I don't know the amount of money.
I know they won two games, right?
Oh, shithead.
Oh, poop.
They've won like three and lost two or won four.
Let me just check their record here.
That's what I meant.
Do we have any calls?
We got to turn those little Mikeys on.
So they're playing the Diamondbacks tomorrow at one.
But what's their record, overview, games?
Do you know what their record is, Matty?
No, off the top of my head, no.
They're number one in NL East.
Well, they always start off good in the first couple of games.
And they end off good too sometimes, right?
No.
Alright, this is taking too long.
We're going to bore people.
Let's keep this free part short and sweet and say, get fired, get in trouble, be brave,
▲
Export Selection