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April 8, 2022 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes
53:06
GOML LIVE #143 - THE DATING SHOW (Part 1)

After laughing at Biden's inability to form a sentence and getting horrified by how unbelievably gay Disney has become, the boys get inundated with relationship advice questions and save marriage after marriage after marriage.

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Time Text
Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes. it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes.
Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes.
This is Darryl Tron, a guy I met in Frederick, Maryland, doing karaoke at a dive bar.
This song's about COVID and hanging out at home watching Game of Thrones.
This song's about COVID and this thing that I'm at home watching Game of Thrones.
He's a funky guy like Prince.
It's called Daryl Tran.
Not a tranny thing, but he's named Daryl, but he's also futuristic and 80s.
So, like, I guess he should have done Daryl Tran.
But he's a very, very funky guy.
Did he play the bass?
No.
He, uh...
I think he mostly plays the keyboard.
I don't think he plays the bass.
But at this particular karaoke, he got up and he did James Brown.
Perfect.
Short little guy, mustache, wears like those crumpled up black Reeboks that guys who hate Giuliani would wear in the 90s.
Kind of baggy pants that don't fit him very well.
But he got up and he did James Brown and just nailed it beautifully.
Sex machine?
I think it was Sex Machine.
So then everyone's like, yeah, it was good.
And then he stands near the mic because I think he intends to return.
And this guy goes, that was really good.
And then Daryl Tran goes, thanks, can I sit here?
And then the original guy goes, yeah.
Now I don't know if, Daryl might be gay and he thought that he had a boyfriend here, or maybe he's just very lonely and he thought he might have a friend.
But there was something happening here.
There was some potential for a relationship.
And then the other guy gets up and he does some song like CCR and nails it too!
And you realize, oh, these guys are like pool sharks.
Like, they're here to rock.
So we have a bond here.
We're both the best karaoke guys here.
On the East Coast?
On the entire East Coast.
And then this fucking bitch, Yoko Ono, shows up and sits with the guy who said that was good.
Now Daryl doesn't have a friend anymore.
And his whole body language changed and he changed his chair like this.
Now he's just watching the singers.
Fuck you two.
You dumped me.
Wow.
And if you check his Facebook, you see that he's a pretty sad guy.
Can you scroll down?
Happiness in music.
Okay.
Are you not on Facebook on that computer, Ryan?
No.
You should be.
You gotta be for work.
But check out his other song that I sent you.
It's much more sad.
A lot of emotions in that second one.
I saw one of his Facebook posts was, yesterday was a pretty tough day.
Oh, Jesus.
I'm not on Facebook, but do people type that?
It's amazing.
People will tell you every second of their life, and then wonder why you know everything they do.
They question, like, how do you know?
It's crazy.
It's insanity.
Had diarrhea again on Thursday.
Oh yeah.
They have no... they... no restrictions.
Look how sad he is.
I think Daryl needs a date.
Maybe he's headed home and it's... What is that?
A purple turtleneck?
Yeah, that's very 80-ish.
I've been listening to CD in my new Jaguar Because we have a CD player and a cassette player Yeah, it's got that cool shit in the back where you can put in 16.
Of 16?
16!
11!
Good thing it wasn't 11.
Anyway, that's my new obsession, Daryl Campbell.
Can you show his video, his YouTube page?
That's a fine Scottish name.
Campbell.
Daryl Tron.
Wait, is that Daryl Tron?
It is Tron.
Am I misreading this?
Oh, it's just got such a fancy O that it resembles an A, but it is Daryltron.
OK, we're good now.
We're back.
I'm going to collab with him.
You should.
He does reggae.
He does Mexican music.
He's got a song about nachos.
The guy's talent knows no bounds.
All right, let's start the show.
Welcome back to GMA Live.
Matty Odell is back.
What's up everybody?
Thank you for all the well wishes and kind words that you sent or posted about me.
I appreciate it.
His feet are just too purple.
It looks like he's wearing fuzzy slippers, but it's his feet.
It's kind of funky.
And you've got your own shirt.
Your own baby monster shirt.
I do.
I love it.
I can't wait to get the big expanded one.
Yeah.
That's gonna be much better.
That's too small.
It's gonna be awesome.
And I designed the shirt.
I didn't draw that.
My cartoonist friend did.
But I designed the shirt thinking of a big, huge, outlandish prince.
Not meant to be subtle.
Right.
It's not a horse.
It's a monster.
Supposed to be exaggerated.
Yeah.
So you know how it works.
The show is free for the first half hour, then we jump behind the paywall, we take calls.
This show, we get to know the people.
That's key.
But before we do, we'd like to welcome back Johnny Apple CBD.
What?
Well, I talked to our friend at seven. - I know, I know, but I just asked But they fired What's-His-Face for being a retard. - No, I'm done trusting people.
Like, we are living in an era of telephone that's brutal.
Like, I got a call from Ethan Nardine's lawyer, who's a great guy, by the way, and that case is fucking nuts!
But he's like, you're trying to raise money for Ethan?
I go, I mean, I could try, but no.
I thought Ethan had money.
He goes, oh, that's what people are saying.
I'm sick of this, like, I heard that you want to do that.
No.
No more.
I'm talking to the boss.
H-N-I-C.
Apple CBD.
The CEO of CBD.
The head nice guy in charge.
Yeah.
Not another word for N. It's nice guy.
He told me to announce Johnny Apple CBD tonight.
I heard that too.
Okay, now he's not answering.
Only time he doesn't answer.
Well, you know what they say, go with what you know.
And know with what you go.
You want something done?
Here we go.
Hello?
So now I'm told not to talk about Johnny Apples CBD.
Our man.
Because the story is they're rebranding, so don't say Johnny Apple CBD.
Okay.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Yeah.
Alright.
You've also got to work on your own bullshit detector there, Ryguy.
So we'd like to welcome back, after a long time, JohnnyApple.com, J-A-C-B-D.
What can you use this shit for?
Oh, everything.
Sleeping better at night.
You've got sore joints.
You've got sore muscles from working out.
You put the CBD on, it instantly stops the aching pains.
It's a magical thing.
I think God is sending us a little wink wink when he made Whatever is in this.
The hemp plant.
The hemp plant.
It's not THC, right?
There's no THC.
No.
No.
Well, you can get CBD gummies with Delta-8, and it'll make you feel like you're high as a kite.
Yeah, my wife had too many of those, and we had a bit of a night.
It's totally legal, but not a fucking joke, so be careful.
Do not fuck around with that shit.
Do not have three if you don't have a high tolerance.
You know what I had to do to keep her alive?
Sing and dance and tell stories basically do the Gavin McInnes show like full blast for Till 2 30 in the morning to prevent a bad trip.
Yeah, just keeping her laughing and like hello my baby Hello, honey.
Whoa, and then I was over here and telling stories and yeah, cuz if you don't then you get those moments where she's like We're all gonna die one day I had to just keep on and then she goes you love that kind of shit.
Oh No, the court jester does not love singing and dancing till 2.30 in the morning to save you from having a bad trip.
But anyway, you know what she used it for once?
On her feet on a night out when she's going to be wearing high-heeled shoes.
She put the CBD cream on her feet to avoid aches there.
They do say transdermal is the best way to absorb it.
So, Johnny Apple CBD, also JohnnyApple.com.
Tinctures are great in your coffee, takes the edge off the caffeine.
It's kind of spooky how effective this is in virtually any shape or form that you sell it.
There's something magical about the hemp plant and I think God is sending us a message because it just makes your life better.
I was talking to Alex Stein today.
Primetime99, Alex Stein, the guy who's been trolling all these Trolling all these town halls and he thinks that the marijuana use that he does is curing his own cancer.
He doesn't have cancer but he thinks it's keeping it away.
Kind of a genius that guy and kind of a nut.
Yeah.
Is that the guy that's been going around talking about his trans five-year-old nephew that wants me?
Yeah.
I commend him.
And he's like Johnny Appleseed, speaking of Johnny Appleseed.
He's going all over the country with these from Hawaii to Portland to Mesquite to fucking Dallas.
And then he's getting other guys to do their own.
Yeah.
That's awesome.
And it really reveals, like, how nothing of a job these local politicians have.
It's such garbage.
They do nothing.
It's a joke.
But what he's saying, it cancels, it's just, it's amazing!
Amazing!
And you can't say what normal human being would sit in that room And just absorb that as if it's okay.
Well, that's the real key right there.
It's not just, fuck you guys, this sucks.
They're actually very well-written diatribes.
Like the one where he was the soldier saying, we need to go fight and die in World War III for Zelensky.
It was eloquent.
It was beautifully written.
If you read it, you'd go, this is a really good speech.
So now we're drifting from trolling and pranks to performance art.
Very talented guy.
Johnny Apple CD.
Okay, that's enough for Johnny Apple.
Look at this.
So I got my car.
You can show the car, Ryan.
We got the Jag.
Car Guys episode coming up.
I won't give anything away, but we've made some incredible discoveries.
Jag achieved.
Look at that.
Speaking of Alex Stein, he deals in used cars.
I told him I paid $20,000 for that and he goes, it's worth $6,500.
So that was not great.
But you got everything new under the hood too.
And the suspension he mentioned.
He replaces the suspension.
I think you got a nice little deal there.
The first bid was $8,000.
It ended up at $13,000.
I had to trailer it to their shop.
That was another, I don't know, $15,000.
They did like $3,000 of repairs.
It kept adding up until it was around $20,000.
But anyway, those guys get free shit from Budweiser.
Which, you know, makes one come in his drawers.
But then you see it.
And you go, though it's still the king of beers, the king didn't spend the budget.
It's also the king of shit.
Like, look at this.
This is one thing they get, and they encourage him to wear this and stuff.
This is like the kind of gross hat your dad wears.
Like, my dad wears a hat like this that says Iowa Hawks.
He has no idea who the Iowa Hawks are.
He just, he found it.
Is that corduroy or no?
No, it's just red, whatever.
Cotton.
This is one of your dad's found hats.
So that's a no.
Garbage sunglasses like China.
I love your new sunglasses.
I like your new sunglasses.
Look at these.
Am I in Devo?
Yeah, crack that whip.
Beer koozie, whatever.
And then just like an undershirt.
I don't know.
Wife beater.
It looks like a Filipino street vendor.
Would have this on and the weird thing is the label is like frayed to shit Implying they get these from the Philippines and they put their logo on it.
I don't know It's got a bit of a used vibe.
So that's probably cost about 56 cents for all that stuff per box now look at these Like, the reason I love 80s Bud merch is it's all high quality.
Like, my Bud hat is blue corduroy and leather and stuff.
These are Budweiser overalls.
Right?
And it's the same kind of vibe when your wife makes, you know, buys the whole family some Christmas, you know, fake Christmas sweaters or little jumpsuits from pajama.com or whatever.
What kind of material is it?
Good question.
It feels like adult diapers.
Is it a synthetic?
You wouldn't want to wear it.
It's like polyester.
Hey, you don't want to wear that near a fire.
Like a grill or a stove.
It'll melt!
It's just fucking shit.
And then check out this.
This is the king of beers, right?
King of beers.
So it's a garbage party city crown with foam in it.
And then just this shit cape.
It almost looks like Burger King.
Yeah, like... You gonna wear that around?
It's the kind of thing where you're going to a Halloween party and they go, oh, you have to dress up.
And you go, oh, I didn't bother.
And they go, come on, dude, everyone's dressing up.
You have to.
And you go, oh, OK, can we stop in here?
There, I'm a king.
Hey, I'm the king.
So I don't want to be sponsored by Bud.
It's quiet.
Yeah, no, it's quiet for him.
It's really quiet.
Hard pass.
In the news.
We have a new Bidenism.
I thought this could be fun where we try to figure out what the fuck he's saying.
I think we're getting really good at understanding Joe Biden.
Speaking Joe Biden.
And being good at it, if you will.
That's been a long time for that one.
It was great the other day how he was just dismissed when Obama was at the White House.
He was like caught outside of the stream of air and he was just spinning around.
Well, you know what I like?
Everyone's talking about that nonstop and it's got so much more meat to that bone than the fucking Will Smith slap where he endured that for a week.
Shut up!
Oh, it's still going on now.
Someone lost his temper and he's a moron and he hit another pussy.
OK, gotcha.
But this, ignoring Joe Biden and abusing him publicly.
It's not a good look for the country.
That's not a good look for the country.
It also shows that they've completely given up on him.
He's dead to them.
And when I say them, I mean Obama, Biden's chief of staff who's running the country, Valerie Jarrett, Kamala Harris, and basically everyone in the White House, too.
Like, the way they were fawning over Barry, Barack Toboggan.
Yep.
Biden!
You ready?
I want you guys to prick up your ears, as they say in England.
See if you can do this.
My pen.
Wait, that doesn't rhyme.
All right, stop.
Most people.
You ready?
I want you guys to prick up your ears, as they say in England.
See if you can do this.
You might need a pen.
To ensure there's been really...
Are we ready?
What?
Wait, wait, wait.
Give me a second.
We're doing it one more time.
This has got to be, it's a game show with Kyle Dunnigan, but I think this would be a fun game show mainstream.
You know what it is?
Most people.
I know.
Okay.
You ready?
You want to do the beginning?
Yes.
Go.
That's the really hard part.
To ensure we're an agreeable America?
That's, to ensure is, I'm pretty confident on that.
I think he said it was to ensure we're an agreeable America.
Okay, the beginning is, you know what it is, most people don't.
To ensure, then I have a lot of trouble, and then I go, we upheld a promise.
It's easy at the end.
It's like a brontosaur.
Yeah.
Or a brachiosaurus.
It's pretty easy at the beginning, then it gets really difficult in the middle, and then it's easy again at the other end.
Jesus Christ.
You know it is, most people don't.
Got it.
To ensure there's revival of America, we upheld a promise.
Oh, we upheld a promise.
That part.
To ensure that we something America.
And then, what is it, after we have held a promise?
We have held a promise.
I got that.
A promise!
You know it is, most people don't.
Hey, we're only missing like one word here.
Yeah.
This is like... It sounds like an agreeable.
This is wordle.
Yeah.
We got all the vowels.
To ensure the revival of America, we have held...
Agreeable America is seeming like the best bet so far.
Can you turn it up?
I find blaring it really helps.
And as much as it sounds crazy, I'm not looking at the actual clip.
Oh is it not behind me?
No.
We should also make clear, Matty doesn't have a screen.
The Mets are opening now.
Can you aim the camera at the Mets?
Yeah.
Is it just a... Oh, he's talking.
There he is.
There we go.
To ensure that we rebuild America, we have held a promise.
To ensure that we agreeable America.
I think he might be trying to be saying, rebuild America.
And he stumbles on it.
Oh, that's better.
We made a promise to rebuild.
Build back better.
But...
Why are you wearing a fucking hat and a suit?
Do you just like making me crazy?
It's easy.
Yeah.
He's wearing a fluorescent green beanie and a fucking gray suit.
Rebuild and agreeable.
Rebuild and agreeable?
Yeah, rebuild.
Because we made a promise.
You know what it is.
Most people don't.
To ensure that we rebuild America, we upheld a promise.
Yep.
I think that's pretty solid there.
Yep.
I'd go with that.
I'd throw that down in the ring.
What happened?
I don't know.
It's your final section.
Your library is currently empty.
It's some fucked up shit.
I didn't pay.
I don't even know when it went out.
Okay, well here.
You try to figure it out.
It's in my favorites.
SNY is in my favorites in TV, mate.
What are you doing, Ryan?
Adjusting the camera to...
Okay, okay Because I want to read the next sponsor.
Oh shit All right, I went to news 12 fuck This is not very exciting TV here.
We're blowing it Did you honestly wear that hat to make me crazy You did it to style your locks.
Yeah, I What the fuck?
Oh man, you know the things.
And you know what you do when you mess with your hair?
You change it like 1%.
Maybe.
It doesn't look different to anyone but you.
It's a good 1%.
And Matty looks super dark.
Yeah.
The light went out.
Point that.
Oh it went out?
No it didn't.
This is terrible TV.
Okay, um, I want to thank BeardVet for coming back.
Let's worry about the technical shit in a second.
Let's get BeardVet out there.
BeardVet, two things, it's a lot of things.
Most of these vets that we have sponsoring us have incredible work ethics, so they never just sell one thing.
Even when they sell the coffee or the beard cream, there's always like kits involved and all kinds of shit.
Maybe they get, do they get the work ethic from being in the military or is being in the military just a natural thing for them because they already had good work ethic and discipline when they went there?
Beard oils, beard grooming kits, beard grooming products.
We drink the coffee here, El Diablo is a kick in the ass.
You know what's fun to do?
You get the El Diablo from BeardVet and then you give a little sprinkle of the Johnny Apple CBD tincture.
So you get the intense rollercoaster ride of their strongest coffee without any of the sketchiness that most coffee has.
BeardVet.com, promo code GAVIN, 15% off.
And my point with all of these is you're getting coffee, so why not get coffee from one of us?
Someone who supports free speech, someone who wants to make America great again.
You know?
When I got my, when I found an optometrist who was mega, he's in the city, but I go see him every time I need glasses.
Because I'm getting glasses anyway, I might as well direct it towards him.
So, direct your coffee buying to BeardVet.com, use promo code Gavin, and show them that you support the troops, you support America, and you want to make America great again.
BeardVet.com, promo code Gavin.
Alright, what's happening over there?
Okay in the meantime I'd like to walk you all through a very easy to do thing.
So we're gonna go to the live show and we're going to show you how to send a super chat or a pay chat.
Legally we can't say super chat but we know what it is.
So you'll go to the live show on a desktop.
You'll click the live show thing.
And there's a little button here.
Donate to read a message on air.
And you'll click that and you'll fill it out.
And then you will have a little thing that you can send into the show.
And it would look like this.
Gavin, can you rank the members of your Whack Pack from healthiest to unhealthiest?
Matty's not really a whack packer, obviously, but whatever.
Sylvia and Donovan.
I don't know what Donovan's disease does.
Do they live a long life?
I think they might.
Is he kind of like Stephen Hawkins?
Have you seen Donovan with his nose?
He has the exact same disease as that guy with the normal head and the garbage body who is always on social media with his girlfriend.
You ever heard of me today?
And they're always doing the same thing.
It's like, it's a TikTok where it's like, is she your nurse?
Your helper?
Your blah blah?
You know, she's my wife.
And you go, you guys, I know why you chose him now.
Because you're a fucking attention whore.
And you love being the woman who's dating the gimp.
If there was no social media, she'd be gone.
She was in a little village in Ireland.
She'd be like, sorry, I gotta go fuck a strong farmer.
No one's paying attention to me.
She's probably still doing that because he's not getting it up.
Now that Gav is gone, Ry, I'm coming for that ass.
I want that Asian zing.
Yeesh.
That sounds sexual and threatening at the same time.
Yeah.
Living dangerously.
Some gay jokes aren't funny.
Like some gay jokes where they go, I'm not gay, but I really would love to fuck you.
You're at the top of my list.
You're like, that's not how we do our gay jokes.
This guy's being a dad.
Congrats.
Thanks for everything, Gavin.
I'm finally becoming a dad.
Many thanks to you, blah, blah, blah.
We don't have to read the ones under a hundred bucks.
All right.
This isn't really a normal thing to do with the show, but maybe we should throw in a quick war on kids because that's been a constant theme here.
Uh, you can play the interstitial.
I like people getting a taste of what we do.
We are living in an ageism era where children are seen as human garbage.
regulations to indoctrinate America's school children with poisonous and divisive left-wing doctrines.
On your feet, soldier!
On your feet!
So we did, can I see how you do the Mets game?
Yes.
It'll be exciting.
Top of the fourth, 0-0-0-0.
Oh no.
We have Noah DeGrom.
Yeah, I still haven't heard how long he's gonna be out.
I'm not happy about that.
No, I don't think anybody was He's our Cy Young superstar.
Anyway, so I think it was Monday's show, Tuesday's show.
By the way, if I lose tonight, I lose 120.
Ouch.
Which is annoying.
That's a big one.
I bet a hundred.
Is that like the normal, what's the average game?
Both on the team, by the team.
Sometimes it's 120, sometimes I lose 80, depending on the odds.
Okay, so that's the range.
Yeah.
Okay.
I think.
But I got Gino Bisconti betting 50 bucks on every Padres game, and then his buddy Matt betting 50 bucks on every Yankees game.
Which is gay.
Yankees.
And then we have the bet with Jimmy.
And then the bet with Jimmy where He says you're going to be plus $11 and you say you're going to be down $1,100.
I say $1,800.
$1,800?
Yep.
Whoever's closer wins.
I like it though.
It's already making that this game more fun.
Yeah.
Got a little skin in the game.
Yeah.
I see those zero zeros and I go... Well, I don't know when's the last time a major league team, even the Mets, lost every game.
I hope it's never happened.
No.
So on Monday, Tuesday, we were talking about this war on kids has been a constant theme with the show this week.
We are wondering are there's definitely a gay agenda in schools.
There's definitely a gay agenda at Disney.
Are you trying to fuck kids or are you just trying to create little revolutionaries and separate us from our kids?
There's a good argument for both.
I have trouble Thinking that entire industries are dying to groom kids.
I know what happens with the Muslims in Britain, but I think it's just misguided brainwashed liberals who might even be a little gay just pushing gay shit because it's the new civil rights.
It's a new anti-racism.
I don't.
I have trouble believing this many people.
50% of Disney want to fuck kids.
But anyway, Chris Rufio is the sort of braveheart of this entire monitoring movement.
And the Bulwark, which is a weird Bulwark means wall, but it's ironically an anti-Trump, allegedly Republican site, and it's just sell-out cucks, like the Lincoln Project, who hate the right, but pretend to be right.
So it sounds more noble, you know?
Rhinos.
Rhinos.
They're like, we're policing our own!
Yeah.
So they wrote an entire article claiming that Chris Rufio's report that Disney wants a minimum of 50% characters to be LGBTQIA?
I thought I was on the cutting edge of this shit.
What's IA?
Lesbian, gay, bi, trans, queer... Intersex?
Intersex?
Oh, like if you have a cunt and a dick?
Wouldn't that be a hermaphrodite?
Yeah.
I think it is.
And hermaphrodite.
And then, cause they always bring up, they don't say hermaphrodite anymore.
They say intersex.
And they always bring that up to Jamie Lee Curtis to talk about, um, women in sports.
And they're like, what team should intersex people play on?
And you're like, Ooh, you mean all three of them?
Yeah.
There's allegedly Jamie Lee Curtis.
And then there was China, the wrestler whose clit was so big, it looked like a kid's dick.
I think that might've been doing massive amounts of testosterone.
Could testosterone turn your clit into a kid's dick?
Yuck.
Anyway, she found a team just fine.
But, uh... Look how stupid this is.
L-G-B-T-Q-Q-I-P-2-S-A-A.
There's not one gay person in America that knows what that means.
Lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, questioning, queer, intersex, pansexual, two-spirits, androgynous, and asexual.
Well, you know who knows it by heart?
It's the 400 pound, pink and light blue baby, like, rainbow fucking skittle hair with glasses.
She's got like 8,000 things coming out of her face.
And she's talking about...
Yeah.
She memorizes it like nerds memorize pie.
Forwards and backwards.
Yeah, and those are the ones doing the actual hard work of banning you from social media.
Because they played video games as a chick.
They became trans.
They're not trans.
They're not even gay.
They're just lonely and bored and ugly and fat and weird.
So when you insult trans, they take it personally.
And that's why you'll notice censorship these days is fucking brutal on anyone who says anything remotely anti-trans.
Like when the Babylon Bee said that Rachel Levine should win the Man of the Year award.
They freaked out, kicked them off Twitter.
You know what?
I'm having a hard time with this.
thing about when they're talking about the voting on the K through three, talking to kids about being gay and trans.
I'm like, we have like a fucking parental guidance.
I don't even know if it's like a consortium or a, they make rules for when you had TV, you had G rated for kids and general audiences.
Yeah, FCC.
PG-13 and PG and then R. Like, you don't start talking about sex with fucking kids.
You don't start talking about like, oh, you said you wanted to be a girl today?
And then you keep just bombarding with that, oh, he's deciding that he's gonna be a girl.
There's also the implication that these topics are floating around kids' heads.
It never comes up.
Here's the thing.
The fucking human brain isn't fully developed until you're 25.
You can't fucking do anything on your own.
You can't have any medical procedures by yourself without your parents' consent if you're a minor.
Like, have they just fucking foregone every fucking thing that this society has done since day one?
Like how do you talk to a fucking five-year-old?
The only people they know, kids know who fuck, are their parents.
And there's nothing worse than the thought of your parents having sex.
So you're literally bringing up the worst thing that they know of.
But why would any adult, any God, like intelligent adult, want to sit down with someone else's child?
And talk about any sex.
Yeah, something's wrong with you.
Heterosexual, gay, whatever.
Bill Burr says that.
He goes, I used to love kids.
Hanging out with kids or like little drunk guys.
And now I'm just so scared of being called a pedophile that when they come up to me, I'm like, ugh.
And it's true.
Whenever you hang around with kids these days, you see a kid at like a barbecue or something, there's always this like, hey, I'm not a pedophile.
Hey, it's going to be fun because they've mainstreamed sex and kids so much that you feel like you have to make it clear that you're not one of them.
You just want to throw a ball back and forth.
You know what they're going to let them get tattoos to?
Because they know if they can change their gender, they should know what artwork they want on their body.
Why is questioning in the acronym?
If you're questioning, well that's fine.
Come back to me when you figure out what letter you are.
Go suck a dick and let me know how it was.
Yeah.
Fucking morons.
I want to be in the Hells Angels maybe.
Or the Pagans, I'm not sure.
Okay.
Well, we're not going to bring you in here.
Here's the thing.
As a maybe.
You don't need a group to make that decision for you.
Yeah.
You're not invited to the team.
You're a fucking individual.
Sorry.
I wish you nothing but the best.
Do your research.
I think you're probably going to end up Q.
But until you have a letter, you're not invited.
One of the letters is not knowing what letter you are?
Yeah.
I have a theory of how this, all this, like, these groups of these misfits, like the Rainbow Skittle Hairs, 400 pounds, you know, I'm a non-binary.
It's when everyone got a fucking participation trophy.
Because they hated to be there.
They were forced to be there.
So they just looked at everything that was going on without them but they were forced to be there and they just picked it apart and they found solidarity with each other.
That's a valid, that's a good theory.
My theory is that it's for ostracized losers who are ugly and have no social skills and they've never had any power.
But then they got into tech, they got into video games because they were bored and alone, and that led them to tech, and that led them to code, and now they're working at like Twitter, Facebook, whatever, and they're making up all these dumb rules, and they get to enforce these stupid rules.
Anyway, so the Bulwark told Chris Rufo that he was lying when they said that they want 50% to be POCs or LGBTs.
It doesn't work out.
And then on their site, Chris points out that by 2022, 50% of regular and recurring characters across Disney General Entertainment scripted content will come from underrepresented groups.
So they called his theory a conspiracy theory, but it's true.
This is why the word conspiracy theory is no longer an insult.
Maybe you just put it appropriate to what the population is.
So, what is trans, like .0004?
Yeah.
Of 1%?
Wait a minute.
Oh, I guess, yeah, you could say that 50% are under- That would be representative of the community that you're from.
They all add up to 50%, I guess?
Anyway, here's another clip.
Did I include that in the notes?
Where this woman said, she admitted to the gay agenda?
I don't think I did, I don't see it here.
It's this black woman, and she said, when I first started working at Disney, I was told they're really conservative, and they don't like this, and they don't like that, and you can't swear, and you can't do this.
But then I got there, and they all totally supported my not-so-secret gay agenda.
Maybe, oh, I sent it to you in a separate email, that's what it is, Ryan.
Okay.
I knew I sent it to you.
My not-so-secret gay agenda.
And everyone at Disney loved it.
Well they must have all hated the company policy then.
So that to me means those crazy theories about the red panda representing homosexuality.
Although I've heard people say it represents sexuality in general because it's a period.
Menstruating.
Because she goes to the bathroom and the red is there and she's embarrassed.
Goddammit, you fucking perverts.
Can't you just do funny cartoons?
Like, Tom and Jerry?
We wanna see a cat beat up a mouse.
Yeah.
Not fuck it.
Try to kill each other every day.
Watch what happens when Tom catches Jerry.
I love Disney's content.
I grew up watching, you know, all of the classics.
They have been a huge, like, informative part of my life, but at the same time, like, I worked at small studios most of my career, and I'd heard, you know, you can hear whispers, like, I'd heard things like, oh, you know, they won't let you show this at a Disney show, and I'm like, okay.
So I was a little, like, sus when I started, but then my experience was Bafflingly the opposite of what I had such an LA way to talk to like, you know, it's I speaking.
It was so bafflingly different.
And I had a career.
I mean, we're working around.
When they do that at the end, then they it's like they're up speaking.
Get out of here.
I feel like we cut her off.
Go back.
Our leadership over there has been so... Thank God there's closed captions and a sign language interpreter.
Just in case you're deaf and illiterate.
Like, my like, not at all secret gay agenda.
And so like, I feel like, I felt like... Attention deficit ordered kid can't read the fucking words or figure out the sign language and misses movie.
Did you hear what she said though?
My not at all secret gay agenda.
Had heard on my little pocket of, like, you know, Proud Family, Disney TVA.
The showrunners were super welcoming.
Meredith Roberts and, like, our leadership over there has been so welcoming to, like, my, like, not at all secret gay agenda.
And so, like, I feel like I felt like... Was she out there, like, pushing it on the crowds or was she, like, in an office?
She's a culturally appropriating, annoying white woman.
I mean, like, maybe it was that way in the past, but I guess, like, something must have happened in the last, like, they're turning it around, they're going hard, and then all that, like, momentum that I felt, like, that sense of, I don't have to be afraid to, like, let's have these two characters kiss.
Ah, shut up, boring.
I'm sick of these people.
I'm so sick of this shit.
Fucking, it's like the most annoying girl in high school is now running the whole world.
It's the tyranny of the oppressed.
It's the tyranny of the shrill minority.
It's the tyranny of the rejected.
It's revenge of the nerds.
Revenge of the boring.
Can we get back to meritocracy, please?
A person running things used to be really qualified.
I don't think the family of five that's sitting on the fucking line for four hours to go on a magic... I mean Space Mountain gives a fuck what you do in your bedroom.
Hey kids, my wife and I are monogamous except during Lent where we have orgies.
That's 40 days a year.
We look forward to it all year and it's back to monogamy.
Dan Savage does that.
Gays are having trouble with monogamy in their marriages.
So they're coming up with all these hacks.
And one of them is like, you get a month off a year to go fuck other dudes.
They may say that.
They go fuck dudes every other weekend.
You guys don't get it.
That's not the design here.
What is a month anyway?
What is what?
What is a month anyway?
Which month?
We're using the Aztec calendar.
Yeah.
It won't be February or the other months with 28 days.
Every month with 28 days.
How's the Mets game going?
It's still 0-0, bottom four.
Alright, so that's enough newsy shit.
Let's take like one call so people can see what our people are like.
Does that say how long DeGrom's gonna be out for?
He starts last season.
I have a theory that he is super far on the autism spectrum.
Really?
Yeah, in every interview it's like he's a fucking robot.
I like having fun.
Baseball is cool.
Are you gonna do some of your funny imitations, Ryan?
Yep.
There's no call so far.
Guys, call in.
The number is, if you're listening, 718-400-6959.
Yet again, that's 400-6959.
Why don't you play the mailbag thing and we'll start opening letters.
We have calls coming in now.
Maybe we'll hit a little bit of this.
You are on the air.
I'm here to have a conversation.
This is a fucking loser.
You know, I'm here to learn, share, listen, understand why.
Hey, why does everyone get two things?
You have one thing.
Thank you for calling.
It was great hearing from you.
Alright, next call.
Did I show you the Gavstav sign?
No.
I sent it to you.
I have it.
Pull it up here.
Thank you to the guy who made this.
He also sent you, Ryan, he had his four-year-old draw.
We don't need to see commercials, thanks.
He had his four-year-old draw a Buzz Lightyear for you.
That's the sign.
That's on the door to the laundry room.
Beauty.
That's at my home bar now.
Look at that.
Conceived of something and then it happened.
It brought it to fruition.
That's awesome.
Did I show you my pool table?
Did we talk about that?
You showed me, I don't know if you showed Ryan.
Did we talk about this on the show?
We got a pool table last night a small one right because we got kids it should be easy then my wife's renovating the bathroom upstairs or having it renovated they pour cement on the floor to they think they've totally sealed it with all the silicon everything then they pour the cement on top cement drips through the floor into the basement covers the pool table from the shower pan on the tub yeah that's post cleaning go to the other one
Like it was a mess.
I called the pool guys.
I thought this might be kind of good actually because I thought the pool table was a little small.
I'll just write it off for my insurance and get a new one and the contractor's like, I'll pay you everything you need.
It's on my insurance and I don't want it to go up.
I had a flood at my old house and we spent like 15 grand fixing up the front room perfectly.
It didn't do shit to my insurance.
Huh.
It's this fear of, like, using your insurance.
I don't think it's justified.
You gotta turn that mic on.
That was the only pool picture.
But we do have a doll.
No, I sent you another one.
I definitely did.
In my email, maybe.
No, it was a text.
I just checked them.
Okay.
I triple checked, actually.
What, do you want to show this doll?
Oh yeah, someone made a doll of me.
I can't bring it into the house.
I think they're making fun of me, but guess what?
You gave me a huge cock, And a six pack.
There's an Indian on my back with a baby Indian.
That was nice.
What are you wearing?
I seem to be wearing like lace shorts.
Yeah.
Is there a tattoo on your leg?
Is there a tattoo on your leg that says Gav?
Yes.
Cool.
Cool.
It's kind of inaccurate, but nice.
Nice touch.
What?
I'm not Gav?
I don't have a tattoo this is getting.
Yeah, you gotta see this picture.
This is a really good picture.
I've played pool on this brand new table.
Plus, we live in fucking Bavaria now in America.
So we've waited about five months for this pool table.
And that's what it looked like today.
That's cement.
Wow.
It looks like a Pink Floyd album cover or something.
Yeah, that's pretty trippy.
We gotta call her online.
But I called the pool guys and they said, we'll just replace the felt.
It'll be like 600 bucks.
Yeah, slate's not gonna get damaged.
Right, yeah, Emily was all worried about the wood buckling, and I go, it's not wood under there.
It's slate.
Yeah.
Fucking slate.
Slate.
Caller, you're on the line.
Hello.
What's going on there, caller?
Hello.
Uhuru.
Uhuru.
I have a recommendation of someone who would make a fantastic, like, censored presents interview with Gav.
I'm not sure if you've heard of him.
Ryan might know him because More Plates More Dates actually did a video about his like test levels like a couple weeks ago.
His name's Andrew Taint.
Andrew Taint.
Did his ancestors live somewhere in between the bag and the butthole?
Yeah, in between Alberta and wherever you grew up in in England.
I don't know.
No.
What's his name?
Andrew Tate.
T-A-T-E.
So he actually had a beef with Scott Adams that, man, blew up into just crazy stuff.
Um, so during when COVID first started, Scott Adams was completely on the whole mask up in quarantine.
I remember that.
Yeah.
Government and uh, Andrew Tate on Twitter called him out on it and was like, Hey man, you're a coward.
Now you're trying to walk back all the stuff you said at the beginning of the pandemic.
Like you weren't a freaking lapdog to the left.
And now you're trying to like flip the script.
But you're a coward and they were just going back and forth on Twitter and it was just this huge ordeal.
So what Andrew did was he messaged his wife, he started messaging Scott Adams' wife on Instagram and offered to fly her to his house and she was completely on board with it.
And right when that happened, He aired out all of the Instagram DMs he did with his wife on Twitter and now the divorce.
That was his wife?
That little girl?
He was with like a 23-year-old.
Well, to be honest, the marriage was over way before that.
Yeah, that was his wife.
Your wife shouldn't be one MMA DM away from saying bye-bye.
Yeah, I mean it was really hilarious.
It's just like women hate cowards.
Scott Adams is a coward.
Look how his wife talks to other men in her DMs.
You know what I guarantee happened with their marriage?
You fuck this beautiful, awesome 23-year-old.
The tits are amazing.
You haven't had tits like that in a while.
Their ass is like you can bounce a dime off it.
Then after about six months of jizzing, you're like, can you fucking shut up?!
I don't care!
And then you're stuck with her.
Yeah, later details came out about that.
Apparently she was screwing her ex-boyfriend and his flight instructor for part of the time.
And yeah, Scott Adams just got exposed as a total cuck.
I mean, it's just...
Everyone who comments that on his Twitter just gets blocked immediately.
I got blocked immediately, but it was really funny like back and forth.
Alright, thanks for calling Juicy Gossip.
We'll consider it.
I'd be where for his ex-wife.
You know, I wanted these, um, sit downs to be free of links because the show is so link heavy.
But if we were interviewing him, we'd have to, uh, we'd have to pull up all this shit, right?
You can't just talk about them like they're this sort of ethereal, non-existent philosophical idea.
Sunglasses inside?
Corny.
Also, by the way, guys, you come up with these guests.
If that guy's been on Tom Segura's podcast, then he's mainstream.
No one mainstream is going to touch me with a million foot pole.
He might be one of those guys that don't give a F. Zuby came and saw you.
Who?
Zuby?
Yeah, that was weird.
There's a group of guys.
He was flying private jets out of Miami the other day.
Really?
Yeah.
We might get Zuby on the network.
But like John Joseph Cro-Mags, I texted him the other day.
Maybe he's got a new number, but no response.
Just move to Florida.
Okay.
I'm training for the triathlon.
Tom, you're online.
Oh, we should kick off the freebies.
Oh yeah, so that was a long time to spend in freebie town.
We're gonna go behind the paywall now.
You guys took advantage of us, you used us, you raped us, and we're done with you.
So to everyone who is watching this or hearing this for free, go fuck yourself.
Go to censored.tv and unfuck yourself for 10 bucks a month.
Get fired, get in trouble, be brave, und never stop fighting this.
Well, I'm just staying home to see Bebe.
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