| Time | Text |
|---|---|
|
China's New Song
00:02:23
|
|
| Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McGuinness. | |
| Cremation takes its piece of your supply. | |
| The night is dressed like noon. | |
| A sailor spoke too soon. | |
| And China's on the dark side of the moon. | |
| Give me that one. | |
| And China's on the dark side of the moon. | |
| China is asshole! | |
| China, did you hear his new way to sing? | |
| Yes. | |
| Yes. | |
| What's his new way to sing? | |
| In the dark sea. | |
| Like Miles McInnes? | |
| No, it's Gordon Lightfoot he's doing. | |
| The sailor spoke too soon. | |
| Sundown, you better take care if I come you creeping down my back door. | |
| The monitor's not working, Ryan. | |
| Oh, for fricks. | |
| I wrote a song for Gordon Lightfoot, Lightfoot. | |
| It goes a little like this. | |
| Because I'm crying inside you again. | |
| You know that I'm crying inside you again. | |
| You know that I'm crying inside and inside and inside. | |
| That's all I got. | |
| That's how I write songs. | |
| I get the hook and then it's up to you. | |
| I just sell hooks. | |
| Maybe Anthony Keatus is as annoyed by his old vocal style as the rest of us. | |
| California nonication. | |
| Love, get into the wall and doodle that dog. | |
| Get him all don't do. | |
| It's a very round sound. | |
| Brian, my little window's all fucked up there. | |
| Look at this. | |
| Do your fucking job. | |
|
Why We Left Chili Peppers
00:02:36
|
|
| You know what? | |
| Ketis is 60 years old. | |
| Oh. | |
| I don't think he's ever been married. | |
| Just fucks models all the time. | |
| I guess you get bored of fucking models, right? | |
| You're just looking down, getting your dick sucked, going, she's pretty. | |
| Anyway, can you get out of here? | |
| I'm 60. | |
| Alex, Vonya, Corny, Kashan. | |
| Sailor cries. | |
| It's weird seeing that guitarist there, John Friscianti. | |
| John Friscianti? | |
| He killed River Phoenix. | |
| Murdered him. | |
| Whoa. | |
| He said, you want to do some heroin? | |
| Rivers like, nah, I don't do that anymore. | |
| And I would probably OD. | |
| And he goes, okay. | |
| You want some Coke? | |
| Yeah, it's not heroin, right? | |
| No. | |
| It's Coke. | |
| Okay, I'll do a bump. | |
| Hey, that was heroin. | |
| Deed. | |
| Damn. | |
| No problem. | |
| If John Fruschianti said, I don't know, I think racism isn't really a big deal anymore. | |
| I mean, maybe it wasn't Jim Crow, but right now, if you're fucked, it's kind of your problem. | |
| You'd never hear from him again. | |
| He'd be banished from society. | |
| If he said, well, I mean, Trump has his faults, but he's enforcing the borders. | |
| I mean, that's pretty good, isn't it? | |
| Again, he'd be murdered. | |
| So rumors of Trump support or potential bigotry are way worse than murdering someone. | |
| In other words, we would rather die than be racist. | |
| I'd rather be racist, thanks. | |
| There he is. | |
| Murderer. | |
| Way to murder, dude. | |
| I used to love the, I loved the chili peppers in 83. | |
| I remember trying to get into a club during the uplift moleful potty plan. | |
| It's punk funk. | |
| And it was, I liked those first albums. | |
| What, Myrtle the Turtle and all that stuff? | |
| They were good. | |
| And then magic came out. | |
| What was it called? | |
| Mother's Milk. | |
| And they opened a time portal from the jock world to the punk world with the song Magic Johnson. | |
| Has anybody got some Magic Johnson? | |
| And all of a sudden, jocks were showing up to their shows. | |
| And we were like, we can't mosh with fucking football players. | |
| They don't get it. | |
| They don't scoop you up when you fall. | |
| And then the Chili Peppers left our scene and went off to become gazillionaires who get blown by models. | |
| Good riddance. | |
| Bye. | |
| And then they became the worst fucking Californication. | |
| I think I might hate as much as Don't Believe Me, Just Watch. | |