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Aug. 23, 2021 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

02:14:26

S04E21 - EVERYTHING WOKE TURNS TO SHIT

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Time	Text
	Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Kevin McGinnis.
	When we first came here, we were cold and we were pretty young.
	With the colours on our skin, when we first came here, we were cold and we were pretty young.
	2,000 and 12.
	I lost my ad agency for saying that trans are mentally okay.
	And I know that you could say, well, there is a modicum of financial musical talent in the base of the song.
	No, they're doing a cover.
	So anything you hear that's remotely musical comes from the original, but look at them fake dancing and playing fake music.
	And like it's just, their culture, trans culture, is worse than gay culture.
	It's total and utter garbage.
	Turn it up.
	It's the opposite of meritocracy.
	Look at these clowns.
	It's like the biggest losers in high school all got together and started a movement.
	There's not one remotely attractive or cool person there.
	Revenge of the nerds.
	That's what we're living under.
	The tyranny of the oppressed.
	Fake oppressed.
	I was going to...
	Let's just cleanse the palette with an old hardcore band from New Jersey called Sand in the Face.
	This is one...
	I just dug up this album when I was a teenager.
	What, 30 years ago?
	No, fucking...
	35 years ago.
	Holy shit, I'm old.
	And so they were probably like 10 years older than me.
	These guys are in their 60s now.
	Oh my god, I'm ancient.
	Put it up.
	Such a good band.
	That band.
	That whole album is golden.
	1986.
	I just bought it because the cover looked cool.
	I was in Canada.
	I didn't know about Jersey hardcore.
	That was the great thing about hardcore.
	It was anti-celebrity.
	So, you know, with punk, you either have to do London, New York, right?
	Johnny Rotten and the Ramones and no other town matters.
	With hardcore, your town matters.
	So people say to me, oh, you're into hardcore?
	And I go, you must know Gorilla Biscuits or Slapshot.
	No.
	I had my bands in my little town.
	Sometimes we might stray all the way to Toronto or Montreal, but not really.
	So we had Honest Engine and The Trapped and Neanderthal Sponge and Grave Concern.
	And then you would get this magazine, Maximum Rock and Roll, and they'd have scene reports.
	So they'd tell you about like Boise Idaho scene.
	It was very egalitarian.
	I learned a lot from that.
	And then the whole DIY thing of putting on your own shows, I learned a lot from.
	And that's something you don't have in your life, Ryan.
	What do you mean?
	Like, with these locksmiths, I wanted a keypad.
	And you're like, okay, it's going to be four months.
	Like, if you have a DIY attitude, then you go buy the thing and find someone else to install it.
	Me and my band used to, I used to do all the artwork for the CDs, the burn CDs.
	And we would go to a show with a bunch of CDs to give away for free.
	Wow, you really understand the free market.
	And the envelopes, too.
	I learned how to fold an origami, and we would just do that all day, just listen to music and fold up these CDs.
	Wait.
	Little envelopes.
	Envelopes.
	Or like CD covers.
	Yeah, you take a piece of cover.
	Yeah, those aren't envelopes.
	CD envelopes.
	CD envelopes?
	An envelope is something that you put something inside and then you seal it.
	It's like a bag.
	It had a flap.
	It's made of paper.
	It had a flap.
	Okay, I have flaps.
	Can you milk me?
	Yeah, I got nipples too, Greg.
	Can you milk me?
	That's one of my best impressions.
	Let's hear it again.
	It's me, Robert De Niro.
	I have nipples.
	You're in the circle of trust, Greg.
	That's not good.
	That's not good.
	I'm glad you were kidding because I thought you were serious for a second.
	We have a lot of stories.
	Three pages of stuff here, folks.
	We're not going to get to it all.
	I want to get to this Proud Boys rally where it was actually a Christian rally.
	Proud Boys showed up to do security.
	Antifa attacked them.
	Gunshots go off.
	And of course, the gay media.
	Most journalists you read in stories like this are either young girls who are playing sex in the city and they're in New York or homosexuals who are bored traveling the world and they throw up some article that says patriotism is bad because they think that all right-wingers hate them.
	And they don't realize that right-wingers don't give a flying fuck who they are or what they do.
	Most of the country doesn't.
	Actually, I've said this before, but when I moved to the suburbs, I was like, The first few months, I was like, I haven't heard anyone say the word gay.
	Because there are no homosexuals in the suburbs, none.
	So, you know, in New York City, you come up with a motion to increase subway fare, and the first, or at least one of the questions, is: well, what do the gays think?
	Will the gays be mad?
	Nope, not in the burbs.
	So, homos with an agenda who are constantly writing articles trying to correct the innate homophobia.
	Not only is there no homophobia, there's no homos in America.
	It's not a thing.
	You're almost like the little tiny Mexicans that do lawn care.
	No one likes or dislikes them.
	They're just a thing.
	No one, like, they don't speak English.
	When you come up to them when they're doing your lawn and you go, hey man, how about that game last night?
	They're like, hey, what?
	Like, why are you crossing the fourth wall to speak to me?
	We are different.
	Okay, sorry.
	Ask me about the game.
	How'd you know I played dice last night?
	You mean the soccer game?
	Yeah.
	Football?
	You don't have to ask them what team they like.
	That's the good part about that.
	What team is it?
	Whatever country they're from.
	They're from Mexico.
	Yep, so Mexico.
	If you ask a Chilean what their favorite team is.
	What country did you think Mexicans are from?
	I knew they're from that, but you don't ever have to ask a soccer player what their favorite team is.
	Chileans don't do lawn care.
	But Chileans love Chile and soccer.
	Like, if you talk to any South American person, you already know their favorite team.
	But aren't there more teams in Mexico than just Mexico?
	Like in Britain, there's 100 teams.
	Oh, yeah, Manchester United and then.
	All right, enough.
	The Kings of Barriers.
	Speaking of Britain, John Cleese has a new show called Cancel Me.
	So he's doing press and stuff.
	He's fucking old, too.
	Why can't everyone just freeze when I liked them?
	So I liked Monty Python in the 70s, so stay that way.
	Someone just sent me a video of Grateful Dead in 1979, and they were ancient then.
	Ancient.
	I want Sand in the Face to still be those 21-year-old punk rockers.
	Not 60-something.
	That's not fair.
	I like Matthew McConaughey.
	Best thing about high school girls.
	I get older and they stay the same age.
	So yeah, John Cleese, which, by the way, when I saw the suit in this link, I thought, no, not that one.
	That's what I want him frozen as.
	I'm going to get Nita Fashions to make me one of those.
	They asked me for my next suit, and I wasn't feeling inspired.
	Now, I'm worried about feedback with the video with checks that close, but I don't think it'll work.
	Doesn't that look great as pants, though?
	You know what that would look good as, too?
	You take the blazer off.
	You're walking around with a shirt and tie in those pants.
	What shoes does he have with that?
	You can go brown or black.
	Black works great.
	So Faulty Towers is funnier than Monty Python.
	One of the funniest shows on earth.
	It's about John Cleese plays Basil Faulty, a bumbling, stumbling hotel owner who just can't seem to get it together.
	And there's a cast of characters.
	Of course, the white males are all idiotic, but at least Manuel here is a moron.
	But it's the women who are in control on this show.
	And I blame men for this.
	Men love to be debased and insulted for some reason.
	They're masochists.
	But while reading about this new John Cleese show, I didn't realize this.
	But last year, Faulty Towers was the victim of cancel culture.
	Now it's a 70s, 80s comedy.
	And there's this old bumbling World War II vet in it.
	And the guy's a racist.
	And you meet these guys all over Britain.
	They're usually upper class.
	The bartender in Withnail and I is one of them.
	And it's like, hello.
	Oh, were you a tank man?
	I could tell you were in the service.
	You used to be able to eat the mushrooms until the jerries poisoned them all, bastards.
	And they're very old-fashioned.
	They're from World War II.
	And one of the old generals, he's got a big white mustache, and he goes, oh, that's cricket today.
	There he is.
	And he goes, oh, all the cricketers are niggers these days.
	Now, the character's a bad man on the show.
	He plays an asshole, an old racist, antiquated fool.
	So when he says the N-word, it is lampooning him and racism.
	But the BBC removed that episode, which they're doing all over Britain.
	They had Elvis Costello, one last white nigger, Oliver Zami is here to stay.
	That again was mocking the way the Catholics were perceived.
	It's like in Germany, they don't allow swastikas.
	So if you have a sticker with a swastika crossed out, you get arrested.
	That's the trouble with censorship.
	That's the trouble with censoring shit.
	You end up hurting the thing you're trying to defend.
	You end up doing more harm than good.
	Show that Faulty Towers clip.
	Maybe you could find it.
	Look up Cricketeer's N-word Faulty Towers.
	Maybe banned.
	So that'll be a cool show.
	But you know what?
	It won't cover Nick Fuentes.
	It won't cover Milo.
	It will only cover non-controversial controversy.
	I promise you.
	There he is.
	Oh, vote, amaz.
	My wife?
	That's it.
	Fine, absolutely fine.
	They're taking it out tomorrow morning.
	Is she good?
	No, not her, the nail.
	They won't have operated until tomorrow.
	What?
	The nail.
	They're taking it out tomorrow.
	But how did she get a nail in her?
	No, I think I told you, Major.
	No, she's having a toenail out.
	What?
	Just the one of them.
	Oh, if it's causing you pain, you have it on.
	Exactly.
	So, now it's not running this place properly.
	So you want your own, I know.
	It's a three-minute clip, but I found a quicker one.
	The strange thing was that throughout the morning, she kept referring to the Indians as niggers.
	No, no, no, no, no, I said.
	Niggers are the West Indians.
	These people are wonks.
	no, no, no, she said.
	All cricketers are niggers.
	A, he's a racist.
	It's a negative portrayal.
	He's seen as a withering idiot.
	And C, that was funny.
	And true.
	No.
	That'd be funny if I was mad about it being factually correct.
	Well, what are then?
	They're not WOGS?
	Yeah.
	Then what are?
	That's like when I would say, I did an article a long time ago called I Love Packies.
	And the editor, it was for a British thing who refused to print it.
	And it was all about reasons I love Indians, Indian immigrants, dot, not feather.
	And they go, well, well, we can't use that word.
	And plus, you're talking about Indians.
	Packies are Pakistanis.
	I go, no, it's a racial epithet.
	Racial epithets are not accurate.
	Like they call Vietnamese gooks because in the Korean War, the Koreans would say, Ian gook, means I am Korean.
	So they thought they just say gook as Korean because they saw all Asians as the same.
	When it came to another war, they'd call them gooks.
	Same with Pakis.
	Racists don't like your country.
	So to them, they're not interested in the nuance.
	Sikhs, Pakistanis, Indians.
	Oh, I guess I put it up on street carnage after they took it down.
	Hotel White Lotus, which I finished yesterday.
	I was in the office all day yesterday because my family's out of town and I was bored.
	So unfortunately, I have 61 articles to discuss.
	A little overprepared.
	And we're already 15 minutes into the first episode.
	But White Lotus, the gay hotel owner or manager in that show, is definitely based on Basil Faulty.
	Him.
	And I believe the mustache is a further homage.
	Now, it's by the guy who did Chuck and Buck, suck and fuck.
	You know that guy?
	No, you don't know anything.
	I forget his name.
	But I'm not sure that guy would be an Anglophile.
	Turn it up.
	Oh my god.
	Can you help me with that?
	Oh my god.
	Lanny, what's going on?
	Why didn't you tell me what cabby?
	I'm sorry.
	I needed work.
	She counted a baby the first time with John?
	I didn't know.
	She's early.
	Oh, she's early.
	Do you have a doctor?
	Lani.
	Dr. Rez is on his way, but he is coming from the other side of the island.
	He'll be here.
	We later learn he's gay and he gets caught eating out a man's ass.
	Maybe one of the guests is a doctor.
	He's having a biting in the lobby.
	What a fantastic moment over the weekend.
	There he is.
	What are his other big hits, though?
	He was in School of Rock.
	Oh, yeah, yeah.
	That was Iraq.
	Ed Schneebly.
	But as far as movies he's made, he's a brilliant filmmaker.
	And White Lotus is an absolute masterpiece.
	There's not one moment where I'm pulled out of it.
	Although it was kind of embarrassing because a Bronx cop texted me last night.
	He's like, hey, come on, I don't got to work tomorrow.
	I'm going to get shitty.
	And I was like, I'm watching White Lotus.
	I had to catch up on the last episode.
	Oh, no.
	So then I thought, maybe I'll lie and say, I'm just catching the Mets.
	But then you can see the Mets in the game.
	Right.
	I mean, at the bar.
	So I just paused it.
	Came out.
	Nice.
	Mike White.
	Oh, he did that stupid emojis movie?
	What are his movies he's known for?
	Known for?
	Chuck and Buck?
	Chuck and Buck, Chuck and Fox.
	A good girl.
	Interesting.
	And then Orange County.
	I didn't know that.
	Writer.
	Huh.
	But we had a great moment over the weekend where Trump said our new motto, everything woke turns to shit.
	And I suspect Donald Trump Jr. does a lot of...
	He turns to shit.
	Okay.
	Does a lot of behind the scenes stuff.
	And he says, you got to say this tonight, Dad.
	I'm convinced, and I'll ask Fleckis, I guess.
	I'm convinced it was Donald Trump Jr. who told Trump to have Fleckis sit next to him.
	And I think he said, you got to say this tonight.
	Because you can tell the way he delivers it, he starts to say it, and everyone's still clapping.
	He's like, no, no, no, I need a moment for this.
	And then he waited for silence, and then he laid down his new campaign slogan.
	But play it now.
	Everything woke turns to shit, okay?
	Oh, that's just the shortened version.
	I thought I had the longer one.
	Oh, that's the drop.
	So I think...
	Well, you're right.
	Here we go.
	Yeah, why didn't you just play what I have in the goddamn notes?
	What woke means?
	It means you're a loser.
	Everything woke.
	Everything woke.
	It's true.
	Everything woke turns to shit.
	Okay?
	Look at what you do.
	Go to 1.5.
	It's so true.
	And I know someone in the stock market.
	I don't understand how this works, but you can bet on things failing.
	I guess that's how Soros made most of his money.
	I don't get how you do that, but you short it?
	Look at that.
	We can steal that, right?
	It's a t-shirt.
	That's our new t-shirts.
	Everything woke turns to shit.
	You don't even need Trump on that.
	Oh, my mind just went blank.
	And then he talks about the soccer player.
	And then the purple-haired...
	I got in trouble because I was talking about the soccer.
	Oh, you've seen the whole thing.
	Soccer player?
	She sucks.
	Oh, yeah, the guy who does the investing.
	So he, if he sees someone saying, great news.
	Hi, this is Nike.
	Great news.
	We're starting a new diversity initiative where we're going to try to get more people of color and women.
	Now, this has nothing to do with people of color and women.
	It has to do with avoiding meritocracy and coming up with different criteria other than merit.
	So you could Say more left-handed people.
	Clearly, you're not going for the best person for the job.
	You have other criteria.
	And when merit isn't number one, you lose.
	It turns to shit.
	So he's made tons of money investing against diversity and affirmative action.
	Speaking of diversity and affirmative action, Hassan Piker, now he's a big Twitch guy.
	I think he might be number one Twitcher.
	With Twitch is just like a shitty version of this.
	Where you sit in your bedroom and you look at something and talk about it while a million people comment.
	And I think donate?
	Do they donate on Twitch?
	I think you can.
	You subscribe, you pay money to subscribe.
	Anyway, who cares?
	It's just shitty television, right?
	And he was pictured wearing a shirt.
	He's one of the worst dudes to look at in the world because he's in L.A. And L.A. has this problem.
	Go down to his shoes.
	Like, imagine being a grown man having a kid and dressing like that with skin-tight floods and low-cut vans.
	I mean, that's embarrassing.
	That's how a 13-year-old dresses.
	With the orange shades, too.
	This is the problem with LA.
	You don't get the checks and balances because you don't go out much because it's all a driving culture.
	So you don't have people going, dude, what the fuck?
	Why you dress like a hot-topic 13-year-old?
	And then you go, and then you don't wear that again.
	And you get better at dressing.
	He's not good at dressing.
	And being good at it, if you will.
	But what's great about that shirt is he wants the rich to pay more.
	And then it was discovered that he lives in a $3 million mansion in Hollywood.
	West Hollywood, which is Faggot Town.
	And so the funnest part of this whole controversy were all these socialists defending him.
	And it's 2.74, but he's put a lot of money in it.
	Defending him and trying to justify it, which was a weird thing.
	So you have all these socialist fans of his, his little baby monsters, saying, what, a guy can't buy a house?
	And a lot of the articles, that picture I just showed you with the shirt, is very hard to find.
	So he's obviously got his lawyers to say it's a copyright issue, and they're taking it down all over the internet.
	It's a very tough picture to find.
	Make the rich pay more.
	And so they're left saying, what, he has to buy a house?
	That's not even that much money these days.
	$2 million?
	I mean, that's barely enough for college these days.
	And they're playing down millionaires.
	And I think what's going on here with these young socialist kids is they think it's just the billionaires.
	It's just Jeff Bezos who has to pay more.
	And with his, they also think billions are trillions.
	So here's how their brain works.
	They think billions are trillions, and they think millions are thousands.
	So someone having 3 million, 4 million is nothing, right?
	He's one of us.
	He's a socialist, just like us.
	And then a billionaire, he could pay off all these trillions of dollars of debt.
	And I've seen them say this.
	Can't Warren Buffett just pay off the deficit?
	No.
	Warren Buffett could pay government spending, which is like $3.5 billion, or about $3 billion a day.
	And those numbers are old.
	We have something like 30% of the money we've printed has been in the past year, the money we've printed ever.
	So these billionaires cannot hold a candle to American debt and American government spending.
	And if you think the rich should pay more, you're the rich, pay more.
	But again, my favorite part of this isn't that.
	It's the socialists going, what, his $2 million is going to end capitalism?
	Oh, that was Ethan from H3H.
	Yeah, Ethan Klein.
	Yeah, he was all over it going, leave him alone.
	It's just a stupid house.
	He's got it.
	You need a big house if you have kids.
	Y'all really think Hassan shouldn't be able to own a nice house and also champion for the poor and underprivileged?
	There's a difference between making millions on Twitch and paying 50% in taxes and Jeff Bezos being worth $150 billion and paying no taxes.
	Happy Hassan is crushing it.
	I mean, that's perfect.
	That's exactly what I just said.
	Us millionaires aren't included in this war on the rich.
	We're not rich.
	Fucking phonies.
	I remember this was Carlos Maz's thing.
	He vanished.
	He was the gay lord who would do irritating videos about Proud Boys and Fox News and racism.
	Just another gay activist who wants to make the world more left-wing so he feels more safe because he's under the assumption that there's homophobes all over the right who want him dead.
	Don't want you dead.
	Don't want you not dead.
	Don't know who you are.
	Don't care who you are.
	Go up to any conservative in Ohio right now.
	How about them fags, huh?
	What?
	You mean like the trans bathrooms thing?
	Yeah, that's annoying.
	No, no, no.
	Normal homos.
	What about them?
	Well, don't you want them all to die?
	What?
	I don't know.
	I never even thought about them before.
	No one's thought of Carlos Maza.
	I mean, he was out to cancel Steven Crowder because Steven Crowder mocked him.
	But as far as like an average American, sorry, Carlos.
	Not relevant.
	And of course, we discover that his activism comes from being rich and pampered his whole life and having the time.
	You see, when you start to get your checks garnished, when you start to really have to pay tax, when you're not pampered your whole life, you start to hate the government and you hate the way they waste your tax money.
	As Bill O'Reilly said, if my tax money kept going into these great roads and this incredible education system, look how fucking loaded his family is.
	Wait, that's James Carville.
	He's yet another one.
	Oh, here he, this is Carlos bitching about James Carville for being rich.
	It's an obscene four-story mansion.
	How obscene.
	And it's a grift.
	That's fucking hypocrisy.
	You know who else was a rich kid, a rich Marxist who never had a job and just sat around all day writing about how rich people are evil?
	Karl Marx.
	He invented it.
	So in a way, these rich kids are being truly Marxist.
	Carlos and his sister, Isabel, registered to vote at a five-bedroom, eight-bathroom waterfront palace in Boca Raton.
	That's kind of weird living with your sister.
	Buying a house with your sister?
	Yeah.
	Isn't that kind of sad?
	Damn.
	Like, where are her kids?
	Is she gay too?
	I love my brother, but it's time to start a life.
	I also spent the weekend immersed in the milk crate craze, milk crate walking.
	I don't think it has a cool name yet.
	I noticed when it first started, which was like Thursday, you would get 30 bucks if you could walk up and down a pile of milk crates that are perfectly stacked.
	The middle one, I think, is about 10 high, 12 high.
	I have seen 1,000 of these.
	I've seen the prize go from $30 to $300.
	And I've seen two people successfully beat it.
	It's funny, I brought it up with the cops last night, and they all were intimately familiar.
	Cops all know cop, I mean, ghetto culture.
	And there was a cop that introduced me to Shizmobin, by the way, but he stopped following it because there's too much anti-cop stuff.
	So Shizmabin, Mobin Shiz, is onto us now.
	Oh, really?
	And they delete video drop comments.
	No.
	Yeah, they especially, they block any GOML followers.
	I'm going to chill them.
	And if, you better not say the bird, which is the bald eagle.
	He knows that one.
	Or you're done.
	You're Dunzel Washington.
	That's hilarious.
	Yeah, so this is a common tactic I've seen where they think if they go in opposite, they think the middle part is the hardest part.
	And if they go in opposite directions, maybe it'll be easier.
	It never works.
	But my favorite thing about this is you don't just fall.
	You fucking bail like God hates you.
	You bail like Zeus is whipping you from the sky.
	And you don't land on medicine balls.
	You land on hard, sharp.
	Ooh, I could just see the bruises on your inner thigh.
	Oh, yeah.
	Yeah.
	It just, God hurls you to the ground mercilessly.
	The mid-back scrapes?
	Ooh.
	Yeah.
	On a sharp corner.
	I could just feel the skin being torn off.
	But here's how you do it.
	The two I've seen do it, and I think I have them listed here.
	I'm not sure.
	It's Grindface and Shismobin are the number one and two sources for all these.
	If you make it to the middle, God bless you.
	And now stop fucking around and zip down.
	Too many people stand on the top and then they go for the one after the top.
	You're dead.
	The one after the top is the most deadly one.
	So just the flash all the way down.
	All right, let's enjoy some milk cake videos.
	We could make this the entire show.
	There are thousands.
	Should we do it?
	I could do it.
	Let's feel till we get bored.
	Yeah.
	There you go.
	Now you take the other side.
	Lots of people giving tips, too.
	This guy's never done it.
	It's a disaster, bro.
	This isn't someone showing off because they're so good at it.
	Neither of those guys have ever pulled it off.
	One guy tried to do it rolling a joint.
	Yeah, I saw that one.
	He ended up on his ass.
	This is sort of like that, what's that catapult ride where they faint in the air?
	Slingshot?
	Slingshot.
	It's like the slingshot videos.
	Like you could watch 1,000.
	No, I meant should we do this?
	Oh, oh, definitely.
	Yeah, they're just not easy to come by.
	Yeah, that's true.
	Like, do you have access to...
	I guess they work at Seatown or something, which is probably...
	You fucking steal them.
	Bye.
	Oh, my God.
	No one ever falls and gets up and goes, oh, well, I missed.
	They always lie there for about a minute in pain.
	Go to...
	Oh, this one is the winner.
	This one's the most, I think the most famous one.
	So what you got to do now, as soon as that right leg comes up, start going down.
	Right back down.
	And that's not fair because they don't give him a route down.
	He's got to jump off the bottom.
	Oh, wow.
	That's not right.
	Well, like, you're not going to walk down anyway, so why even complete it?
	Now, wait, this is over.
	You've already blown it.
	See, you've blown it now.
	Now your frequency's out of control.
	And now you believe you can fly.
	I believe I can touch the sky.
	Oh, your center gravity.
	Boom.
	He hit his face first.
	Sure did.
	And if you put your hands down and you're that fat, you're just going to break your wrist.
	He's definitely shattered his fucking eye skull.
	There's a meme.
	Fatso learned to fly memes.
	There we are.
	What does he say?
	The jokes are coming in.
	That's not funny.
	That's funny.
	Break dancing competition.
	Face of regret.
	I think that's the face of concussed.
	These little ass pads are going to do something.
	Okay, go to...
	Click on Grind Face.
	Grind First.
	And let's...
	There's so many of them.
	What's that one on the right?
	No, that's military.
	Oh, they've already...
	Summer.
	This motherfucker right here brought the community together.
	Oh, they've already moved on.
	No, don't use that one.
	That one's a stupid.
	It's not real.
	Yeah, there's a good one.
	By the way, Crocs in the hood in the Bronx were at 100% rate.
	The amount of conformity in the hood.
	Uh-oh.
	Well, that wasn't fair.
	They didn't give him enough stairs to go down.
	See, we need a ref in the streets.
	Yeah.
	I want to be the head of the milk crate board.
	Wear a little outfit like a boxing referee.
	Clipboard and all that.
	See, that's the perfect one.
	That's great.
	Blue in the middle.
	One, two, three, four, five, six.
	So it's seven crates high, and you have a perfect number of even crates up to that and down.
	Grass is the ideal, unless you have like big wrestling mats.
	Okay, you've got two more, And then it's just time to wrap it up.
	Oh, shit.
	A lot of people just kick the crates, which is a ref.
	This one turned into a shootout.
	Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
	That's a good one.
	The shootout begins.
	Don't shoot the crates.
	That's also frowned upon.
	Yeah, that's right.
	I hold up the yellow card for all shootouts.
	Look at that one.
	That's all.
	Oh, dude.
	100% guaranteed broken rib.
	What if you're dick?
	What if you're Gooch?
	What if you're ball?
	I don't understand you.
	Is that street slang?
	Picture you got a square crate, and then it's on its way down.
	It like kind of does a sideways diamond thing where, like, and then you fall, and then your dick hits the thing, and then...
	Or just imagine any dick pain here.
	Well, there's a dick right here.
	Hey.
	It looks like he smushed his dick, is what I'm saying.
	I think he's cracked his rib.
	I think he's got to take a month off from coughing, laughing, getting out of bed.
	Crack all my ribs.
	Leave my dick out of it, please.
	Okay, next.
	See, are you bored yet?
	I'm not remotely bored, but I want to entertain our baby monsters.
	Oh, that looks like a good one.
	Cheating, cheating, nope.
	Now, as a ref, you'd be immediately disqualified.
	But they're pretty lax here as the sport is just beginning.
	Barstuel sports.
	Nope.
	Oh!
	We got no wind out of him.
	See, they're squishing grapes out here.
	Man, he taking these folks' crates.
	We're going to have to start locking up crates now.
	Oh, I think she...
	No, no.
	The woman I saw do it had shoes on.
	Lowering your center of gravity.
	Women I find do better than men.
	They lower center of gravity.
	She...
	Oh.
	Dude, your back is hurt.
	Curated.
	What's this saying with how to pick people up immediately after they fall?
	Like when someone's concussed in a fight.
	Oh, my God.
	So dangerous.
	I don't like it.
	Oh, I think this might be the guy who did it.
	One, two, three, four, five, six, seven.
	Yep.
	So write him out.
	I want to whistle.
	This is what I want my next career to be.
	Milk crate referee officiate.
	I got to come up with a line.
	Let's get ready to milk crate walk.
	No, that's not great.
	Let's climb the crates.
	A very unsuccessful trend was the fill out a job application challenge.
	Fucking just empty hashtag.
	Are you ready to climb the crates?
	Come on.
	Get walking.
	So many Monday night quarterbacks.
	Oh, no.
	Oh.
	It's like if you don't land on a pile of crates, you have to land face first.
	What?
	This is ridiculous.
	Oh, she got lucky.
	She did very well for herself.
	Oh, she went back for more?
	I might count that.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	That last one.
	Yeah.
	Copy?
	As long as you touch your feet to each crate.
	What are the rules here, Gav?
	Do you have to touch every crit?
	Every crate.
	That?
	She touched every one, but...
	But she did land on her ass.
	That was 90%.
	Yeah.
	She must be a crackhead if she's going back to do it again.
	Probably wants the 20 bucks.
	Well, we have a white man for the first time ever.
	Looks a little Latino to me.
	He's got Latino.
	They're whites.
	We've already gone through this.
	Really?
	Okay.
	His jowls.
	Everyone's white except poor blacks.
	Oh, yeah.
	Come on, buddy.
	Bribe first.
	Does the Tai Chi hands help?
	Nope.
	And you're gone.
	Oh!
	When you kick the crate out.
	Oh, I think he's out.
	Yeah, leave him alone.
	Look, see, this one, exactly what I was just talking about.
	Look, I got to get him up.
	No, you don't.
	Keep him on his side and he'll slowly recover.
	He doesn't have to be dancing around passed out.
	Like if people got a Hennessy in their hand.
	God, now I feel like I want to see someone do it.
	After passing out like that in front of all those people, he won the Keep Your Wallet Challenge, which is really stunning.
	No, you can already tell.
	Was this fake?
	Set up?
	Oh, he got far, though.
	It started on the top crate, right?
	No, no, no.
	And the filming did.
	Oh, wow.
	He's not wiggling up there, though.
	What's the secret?
	I feel like that's the fucked up thing.
	I feel like I could do it.
	I feel like I could instantly do this.
	And it'll be easy.
	Women shouldn't be doing this.
	No, that's cheating.
	Tweet!
	They don't push it down.
	See, there's regulation.
	There's honor among cheese.
	You cheat, you yeet.
	Lots of sympathy, though.
	Oh, fuck.
	Did she scrape her face?
	Yeah, I think she hit her head first on the pavement, forehead first.
	Okay, one more.
	I mean, I watched a thousand and I saw two people do it, so the odds of this being a success are remarkably low.
	They have the African colors.
	You got this.
	You got this.
	No, you don't.
	Okay, now the secret is to just get the fuck down now.
	Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop.
	Look, he's laughing.
	I got the best Angle.
	All right, let's just jump to Proud Boys because it's quite relevant.
	Major clashes in Portland.
	So the gay news.
	I'll make you proud of your boys.
	Proud boys, stand back and stand by.
	Is that the Proud Boys background?
	We don't have a Proud Boys background.
	Oh.
	I like this background.
	So the narrative is right wing and left wing had a fight.
	Both are equally guilty, and that's just the way it is.
	We live in contentious times.
	Of course, the narrative is never even close to the truth anymore.
	Narry the two shall meet.
	And the truth is, Christian Group wants to have a rally to pray and promote Jesus Christ, which we don't have in this country.
	It's dying.
	Zoomers are the least religious generation in the history of America.
	And coincidentally, they're the most depressed.
	I mean, why live if you're just a random piece of existence and you're not part of anything?
	And this isn't a miracle.
	You're just some random cockroach.
	You should step on a cockroach.
	I know, I'll step on myself.
	So Christians are desperate to get God back in the American conversation.
	So they have a rally.
	Now, the second that is announced, as we've seen in the past in Portland, Antifa show up and violently assault women, children, everyone.
	Why?
	I don't really know.
	You're an anarchist, so you don't like the government.
	What's that got to do with someone's religion?
	And if it was a Muslim prayer or a Jewish prayer or a Buddhist prayer, Antifa wouldn't give a shit.
	In other words, this has nothing to do with politics.
	It has to do with spoiled brats and in the case of the Pacific Northwest, meth heads, mad at their parents.
	And Christianity represents mom and daddity.
	So I'll jump to the end.
	It ends in a gunfight.
	It's Portland.
	A rainy mountain bike town is now having shootouts with left-wing extremists.
	Remember, white nationalism is the biggest threat to America.
	Not radical meth heads who turn a prayer into a shootout.
	And make no mistake, they started this.
	Here's another angle.
	How do you have a shootout not hit anyone?
	So the story I got was they were chasing this guy and they were armed, so he stopped and shot at them and then they shot back at him.
	Because of prayers.
	This was the Daily Mail the most.
	Actually, go back to that, Andrew Kimmel, because he's got a lot of footage.
	No, that's not really it.
	That's a Quasar Science Q5 Lion.
	That's the VP of Portland.
	These are all the guys who were doing talks.
	As at all of these, like, go up, go up.
	As at all these rallies, Jesus, no, the one below that.
	Jesus is the common thread mentioned in every speech.
	Yeah, it's a Christian rally, you fucking boob.
	Oh, that's the guy we had on the show, Randy Ireland, talking about all the guys detained in lockdown.
	And as we discussed last week, the FBI has decided there's no evidence of any kind of planned attack, planned insurrection.
	It was clearly just a spontaneous mess.
	Okay, then can these guys get out?
	Can it be time-served, please?
	But then they get Owen.
	And then they just arrested Owen Troyer, yeah.
	Today he's turning himself in.
	The fuck?
	That's so weird.
	You know what it shows you, too?
	It shows you the crippling incompetence of the administration.
	The government in general, I don't think Trump's government would be much more efficient.
	Trump's just one man.
	It's still the retarded government.
	Pause that video.
	I want to get to that.
	And that's the same reason we have all these people stuck in Kabul.
	Because of bureaucracy.
	They don't have the proper paperwork.
	And you know what they did?
	Their solution to that was to send out these visas with no names on them.
	It's just a blank one.
	You write in your own name.
	So guess what?
	People are printing them out and putting their names on them that don't belong in America and had nothing to do with the war.
	Obviously.
	Fucking losers.
	The guy who started the wounded vets or something like that, you saw him on MSNBC?
	He was like, we had all the names of the people that worked with us.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	He said, and it was a lot of names.
	It was like, yeah.
	It's like, I have a list of 12,000 Americans.
	Then I saw some other video, I think it's in my notes, where this guy goes, I don't think you understand.
	This is the deal with America.
	This is why men fight and die for this one thing, which is if you're an American and you're in trouble, we come get you.
	Right.
	Anyway, go back to that speech.
	So this is very unfortunate for the narrative because it's a black guy saying, remember who we are.
	We're Christians.
	We don't hurt innocent people.
	Obviously, these are not good people we're looking at, but they're not hurting anyone or doing anything.
	The second they start attacking, we will unleash.
	Said by a black man.
	Remember who we are.
	We're Christians.
	We don't hurt innocent people.
	Obviously, these are not good people we're looking at, but they're not hurting people.
	They're not doing anything.
	The second they start attacking, we will unleash something.
	Remember who we are.
	We're Christians.
	This is the same guy who got his tooth knocked out.
	Are you sure?
	Some black guy Philip something?
	Yeah, Philip Anderson.
	Oh.
	He's a good dude.
	Are they too fat for these new shirts?
	He got his tooth knocked out over here somewhere.
	So I guess he got a new tooth, which is good.
	That's his nickname, New Tooth.
	New Tooth.
	They call him.
	Of course, women gotta get involved.
	I gotta come to the violent rally and dress up like a dude.
	So, yeah, you're at 4.9 now?
	Yeah.
	So, Adam Mano is a globe-traveling homo who is the guy I've been talking about this whole show, just like Carlos Maza.
	He writes about Proud Boys a lot, Patriots.
	All his articles are involving gays somehow, and how the radical right thinks that Drag Queen Story Hour is going to somehow lead to pedophilia, and you're like, it already has.
	They have, I think, four or five of them have been registered sex offenders so far.
	All on this agenda to get homophobia out of the right-wing agenda when it's not even in it.
	So he writes this shitstain of an article that basically just says, it was right versus left.
	And then I love, I'm scrolling down, looking at it, and there's the gunfire we just saw, right?
	There's a guy arrested.
	And then the caption says, we have no idea what side he's on.
	Hmm.
	Dress in all black with a black mask on.
	It's unclear if he was part of the protest.
	It's pretty clear to me.
	No love for Nazis.
	So if you are a Christian, you're a Nazi.
	I think 70% of America identifies as Christian.
	So we live in a 70% Nazi country.
	I get the no love for Nazis thing, but what's with crossing out left turns?
	They don't like left turns?
	What the hell?
	Yeah, maybe they mean like people who are fake liberals who didn't grow up liberal and then just turn liberal one day.
	No, turn left.
	Yeah, be like.
	If you're left, you're left.
	We're not looking for any poser newbies.
	Yeah.
	Pepper spraying each other?
	The only weapons they're allowed?
	Well, they're apparently allowed guns, too.
	Antifa crashed.
	Oh, there we go.
	So they crashed that van and they tipped it over.
	No, two drivers attacked Proud Boys.
	So they destroyed the cars and flipped over their vehicles.
	That's not a handicapped thing.
	That's what used to be a handicapped thing, and now it's used to cart Antifa around to go attack women and children.
	And then some other guy showed up, and he was dumb enough to drive right up to the rally.
	Keep going down?
	Right up to the rally, and then get out and start attacking people.
	So then they see him, they chase him, he jumps back in his car.
	Oh my God.
	James Klug?
	We used to try to make up the worst names we could.
	Was that one of them?
	No, but it was Klog.
	Yeah, that was pretty bad.
	We were like, James Klog.
	Is that James Klug?
	Or Krug?
	I believe that is Klug.
	KL Klug.
	Klug.
	See the umla?
	Yeah.
	Klug.
	Your name sucks.
	Klug.
	Because what the fuck are you trying to do?
	Why are you coming down here?
	We changed locations so you would leave us alone.
	We're done running away.
	We have no other option but to stand up for ourselves.
	If we keep running away, there'll be nowhere for us to speak freely.
	There'll be nowhere for us to exercise the constitutional rights, the First Amendment, to express yourself.
	You have to be able to express yourself politically, culturally, all of it.
	If you can't do it, this is a communist country.
	We're going to fight communism.
	That's what this is.
	Ted Wheeler keeps lying.
	He keeps saying that we're the problem.
	We're not hunting down Antifa.
	They come here, they start a fight, they lose, and now they're trying to come back again.
	It won't even get down the middle of the morning.
	You know, he's been involved in a lot of these rallies and stuff like that, very politically engaged, but he still keeps that just a dude vibe.
	Where it's, you know, that's not very speechy.
	It's just like, dude, I'm pissed.
	This is just the truth.
	No, but it's hard to even sum up your point in a dude vibe.
	And he's right.
	And here's the other thing.
	That was at a random parking lot, that prayer thing.
	It wasn't like downtown in the square or next to Antifa's warehouse.
	It was like way out in the middle of nowhere in a parking lot.
	And Antifa found out about it and came to destroy it.
	Go back to the Daily Mail, though.
	Fascists.
	Shut the fuck up.
	Keep going down.
	Oh, that's the guy I was talking about.
	So he goes there, fucks with people, jumps back in his car, so they total him, pepper spray him, and kick his ass.
	This is something Antifa has done to normal patriots a million times, including base Stickman.
	They're not showing what he did, which is great.
	Looks like this happened out of nowhere.
	See, this is the problem with the Daily Mail.
	They always have a lot of pictures with their articles.
	So the Nazi narrative falls apart to anyone with eyeballs.
	Keep going down.
	Down, down, down.
	Down, down, down.
	See, they saved the black people for the end.
	There's a preacher that got...
	There's a loser.
	Preacher who got sprayed.
	Keep going?
	I think that might be that Spartan guy.
	Sinister looking.
	Okay, most people have stopped scrolling by now.
	So we can show the black guy.
	Bullet holes.
	That looks fun.
	Wow, a lot of pics today.
	A lot of pics.
	It seems like sometimes there's more people taking pictures than there are at the event.
	Participating in the event.
	This is still going.
	This is longer than our milk crate section.
	We're basically going home.
	Like, what did you do?
	Like, wait, wait.
	Is that a tea towel?
	No, that's like a bathroom towel, isn't it?
	Like, when you get out of the shower?
	Yeah, like a little mat, like a welcome mat or a fucking bathroom mat.
	I think it's a bathroom mat so your tiles don't get too wet when you first step out of the shower.
	Then you sat there with a little marker.
	He's a grown man.
	What a fucking loser.
	Keep going.
	All of our enemies are losers.
	She got hit with a paintball.
	I came to pick a fight and I got punched.
	I fucked around and then I found out.
	Keep going.
	Keep going.
	We're almost there.
	Oh, shoot.
	There's a picture of a black dude and he's clearly...
	I think it's the Black Dude we've been looking at the whole time, and it has the only one with no photo caption.
	Folks at home listening to the audio are confused right now.
	They think their thing broke.
	Maybe that was it?
	No.
	They named him.
	Yeah.
	This is hurting my point.
	But he was a...
	There was just a lone black picture that's captionless.
	They might have updated it.
	Yeah, maybe they did.
	That does happen.
	And again, you always got to check the writer.
	You're not dealing with Walter Krunkite.
	This is not hard-hitting news.
	This is a gay hobby that he uses to buy travel money so he can go on trips.
	Buy travel money?
	So he can get some travel money to buy plane tickets to go sunbathe.
	Check him out.
	Adam Mono?
	Yeah.
	No, it's 5-0.
	When I say check something out, just assume it's the next link.
	There he is.
	Hey, guys.
	Oh, I think that red rose is a little Easter egg.
	That's the symbol for the New York socialists.
	Really?
	The Democratic Socialists in general, not just New York.
	So this guy who's writing about, you know, something pretty serious, random extremists attacking Christians.
	And what's his real interests?
	Memes and fucking like, okay, that's heavy Afghan reporter.
	I need publics.
	Where's the next stimulus check?
	Okay, Miss Billie Eilish has killed it once again, I fear.
	Me, part of the right-wing stan.
	He's in Scotland.
	Now I'm in Scotland, you guys.
	The covered Bezos Lat.
	Summer in London is 66 degrees.
	I've found home.
	Stray man at the bar.
	My friend's gay.
	Anyway, that's who's reporting.
	When we talk about the media, it's a lot of just random homos just like farting out shit they don't care about.
	Even that guy John Levine, who's now right wing, he did a hit piece on me.
	Now that he's right wing, I had dinner with him and Ann Coulter.
	He apologized.
	And I said, why'd you write that hit piece?
	He's like, I don't know.
	Like, there's zero passion.
	The old spinster sluts and the frivolous gays writing most Daily Mail, even New York Post articles, don't give a fuck about what they're writing about.
	They're getting $30 to $40 an article and they need like $120 a day.
	Usually dad pays the rent.
	So they're just farting it out.
	Also in Proud Boys News, this is old news now.
	This is from last week, but they stormed Fox News and just so half-assed.
	Look, little pieces of paper you print it out.
	And I've noticed that Proud Boys is an adjective now, just meaning, I don't know, white nationalist.
	You're Proud Boys, you're KKK, you're Zionist.
	So black people are dying.
	You're not talking about that.
	You're Zionist, you're KKK, you're proud boys.
	I mean, the lack of intellectual rigor in these things is downright embarrassing.
	I don't think I was that stupid when I was 14.
	Like, just say black people are dying on the streets.
	There's been zero reporting on, and then maybe have some names.
	Like Tamisha Weiler and Derek Norris and Shaquan Jackson.
	They died three blocks from here in Hell's Kitchen.
	And Fox News spent zero seconds covering it.
	Gotcha.
	That's interesting.
	But KKK, Proud Boy, Zionists, were dying.
	What?
	Do you hate Mondays too?
	Fucking losers.
	Oh, yeah.
	This was what I was just talking about, 5-3, about the lack of God.
	And it's part of the reason that these patriots and Christians are getting so desperate to save people.
	Most of my generation doesn't believe in God.
	Kind of weird how we're also the most depressed.
	And what's the next one here?
	Sharing belief in God without a doubt.
	So the silent generation's barely budged.
	Boomers are pretty darn steady at 63, 4%.
	Gen X has gone up, which that's true in my case.
	Actually, I think that's me.
	That was just you?
	You doing that bump happen?
	Although I didn't become a believer until my daughter was born in 06.
	So there's not exactly a jump there.
	I guess I can't.
	Millennials plummeting.
	And then look at Gen Z. From under half to over a third.
	Pretty sad.
	Literally pretty sad.
	And then the other thing we're seeing here, too, is lack of God and the war on men is leading to suicide.
	That's kind of why the Proud Boys exist, is to bring back patriarchy, Christianity, and family.
	Because without it, you're not doing well.
	That's what I don't like about these atheists, radicals, communists.
	They want to take what's been established over thousands of years and replace it with nothing at all.
	And what does it lead to?
	Destitution.
	Look at 5-2.
	Very interesting discussion with some guy who looks like he's in a sitcom, no, a soap opera.
	Focused on girls and women's issues.
	Why are we not even seeing the boys and men's issues that are coming up?
	Boys are falling behind girls in almost every single academic subject, including reading and writing, which are the two biggest predictors of success or failure.
	And boys who do badly in those subjects are much more likely to drop out of high school.
	And boys who drop out of high school are more than 20% likely to be unemployed in their 20s.
	And so that's just the academic part of it, mental health part of it.
	When boys and girls are nine, they commit suicide about equally and very minimally.
	Between the ages of 10 and 14, boys commit suicide twice as often as girls.
	Between the ages of 15 and 19, they commit suicide four times as often as girls.
	Between the ages of 20 and 25, they commit suicide about five times as often as girls.
	And most people don't even know this, pay attention to this.
	But this is only the tip of the iceberg of the mental health issue.
	We're so focused on this.
	Why don't they know this?
	What's that?
	Say that again.
	Why don't they know this?
	Because men are disposable.
	In modern society, men are garbage.
	Which brings me to the war on kids.
	I kind of had a nice flow here.
	I overprepared, so things flow one another.
	So if I hop around, I kill the flow.
	All right, let's jump into racism.
	And then we'll get into the war on kids because I have a good segue.
	Let's...
	Talk top about racism that was racist, guys.
	One of the problems with black privilege is you coddle a demographic so much that they're weak.
	And in this day and age, in the free market of ideas, when a black person gets insulted, they immediately start to go fun me.
	So they, just like the guy in the car who came there to fuck shit up and got his shit fucked up, this woman jumps on white people, Westerners, whatever.
	Why did a white woman write a cookbook about dumplings and noodles?
	And then people go, fuck you.
	She's a cook.
	Dumplings and noodles are a thing that it's possible to learn about.
	Like, can a person with no legs write a book about baseball?
	Yes.
	It's conceivable.
	It's conceivable that you could wrap your mind around it.
	What about historians?
	I heard this great podcast last night.
	I couldn't sleep.
	Do you get this?
	If you don't eat dinner, you can't sleep?
	Yeah.
	It's recommended you kind of eat a little something before bed.
	Yeah, I just, I had a breakfast at 1 p.m.
	This is life without your family.
	I had breakfast at 1 p.m. and then went drinking with the cops.
	And I was awake from like 3 to 6.
	Jesus.
	So I listened to a podcast.
	And you're not just like kind of like, I can't sleep very well.
	I'm as awake as right now.
	Yep.
	And you're trying to fall asleep.
	And then eventually you do that thing where you're like, this is ridiculous.
	What the fuck?
	And so I put on this podcast called History starring Dallyrymple.
	And it was about the Afghan war, the first one.
	Well, I guess Alexander the Great was the first one, but the one in 1837.
	And it pissed me off.
	Let me tell you why this pissed me off.
	So history is in the name of the regular podcast.
	Dallyrymple was the guest, Willie Dallyrymple, Will Dallyrymple, and he's an expert on the Afghan War of 1837.
	But this is what pissed me off.
	I was talking to the gym today, and we were doing this thing where you punch the guy's gloves, and the secret to lasting, especially these young whippersnappers, I get signed up with like a 22-year-old, and he's like, all right, let's go.
	Pop, pop, pop, up.
	And I'm like, dude, we're going to be doing this for a three-minute round.
	You're supposed to start like this.
	Pop, pop, pop, pop.
	But these kids start like this, and I go, okay, check back in with me at the two-minute mark.
	And then I was, what is it?
	Yep.
	But it wasn't called History Extra.
	He's done a couple.
	Maybe I could find the real one.
	Yeah, he's an expert on the East India Trading Company, and he's so interesting that it made me think, I got to look up the East India Company.
	They're treated like a corporate, they're clearly a corporation, they're a company, but they have the same sort of historical relevance as any other country.
	Now I'm interested in history at 51, finally.
	Anyway, so we're hitting each other's gloves, and I put my back to the clock because most rounds are two minutes.
	So at my gym, they do three minutes.
	So when you box in real life, it'll seem really fast.
	It's like training with a cement puck.
	But I hate that first minute from three to two.
	No.
	I have the first two minutes.
	So I'm like, oh, God, I can't.
	If it's 1.05 and we still have a minute and 5 to go, I'm going to kill myself.
	So I put my back to it.
	And then we started talking about how in school you would stare at the clock and you're like, I can't look at the clock until half an hour has gone by.
	And then I can look at 45.
	And then 45 to the end of the hour, that's easy peas.
	But it's the first half hour that's hell.
	And then you finally go, all right, I'm going to fucking look.
	And you look and it's only been 10 minutes.
	That's how I feel about the boxing bell.
	And then as I'm saying that, I didn't say this to the other guy because it's kind of involved of a conversation.
	Even the clock thing was a lot to say when you're punching someone's gloves.
	I got mad.
	American history is some of the most interesting history in the world, but history in general, we're going back thousands of years.
	There's a lot of cool stories there.
	And you don't have to say fucking shit to get everyone's interest, but can you make it a little cooler and interesting?
	Like, according to this podcast I heard at 3 in the morning from Dallyrymple, the Brits show up to Afghanistan because it's the Silk Road or whatever.
	It's a great thoroughfare.
	And they're so arrogant and top-heavy back then that one of the military guys' wives has a grand piano.
	They had a camel that was just handling their Eau de Cologne.
	And I remember hearing this about the Boers in South Africa.
	They had a whole group that was carrying the portable gym.
	They had a gym set up.
	Just work out after a hard day of killing people.
	And they weren't faring so badly until this guy, Alexander Burns, who was Robbie Burns' cousin, so a Scotsman, a horny Scot, started fucking the warlord's wives.
	Guess what?
	That made them mad.
	Can you believe that?
	So then they started really kicking ass and getting pissed off.
	and they started dying from the heat too.
	They weren't ready for the desert heat.
	They brought foxhounds to go hunting, I guess.
	They all died.
	They ended up eating the foxhounds.
	I'm hearing all this.
	And I'm thinking, if my teacher was talking like that in school, I wouldn't be staring at the clock.
	I'd be like, who the fuck?
	Who brings a grand piano to a war?
	Like, if my wife, first of all, why is my wife coming with me to a war?
	But secondly, no.
	You know how many camels I need to carry a grand piano?
	Absolutely not.
	Though they ended up using the grand piano as firewood.
	Have you found it yet?
	That exact podcast?
	No.
	Well, you've had like a year.
	I told you the name of the guest.
	I told you a word that's in the name of the regular podcast.
	Like, that's pretty good, dude.
	Let's see.
	I listened to it on Spotify.
	Maybe it shows you recently played.
	I could search that.
	I got my Spotify.
	I mean, come on, guy.
	Deep cuts.
	These are all my daughter's playlists.
	She's taking it over.
	Podcasts?
	Borderless.
	Afghanistan.
	I mean, how many podcasts has he appeared on, really, recently?
	He does a lot, this guy.
	Where he's talking about the Afghan war.
	If I find this before you, you're fired.
	I think it was 1837.
	Real history, or the rest is history?
	The rest is history, correct.
	That's the podcast.
	There we go.
	The rest is history.
	And it was the...
	Let me see.
	Is that the right episode?
	The first, yeah, that's right.
	It's true that Afghanistan has always been this sort of graveyard of empires.
	The Mughals had it.
	It's a very successful summer cup.
	When we think of Mughal summer cups, we tend to think of Kashmir because it's within India.
	It's sort of like at my old church.
	They got this Nairobian who's the main priest now.
	And it's like the guy's wonderful Catholic and everything, but his English sucks.
	What does he call church?
	Chich.
	When you go to church.
	You have to remind yourself in God's arms.
	And you have to come to the church.
	Chich?
	Church is public speaking.
	I'd rather have a guy who doesn't know the Bible as well as that new African immigrant who can articulate more.
	It's a very rare gift.
	And we teach it in school like everyone can do it.
	You remember public speaking?
	That's a total myth, by the way.
	The reason they do that is so they can sit on their ass and play with crossroad puzzles.
	You can't learn.
	It's a very rare skill, which is why every ad agency, every company has one.
	Vice had Shane Smith.
	My ad agency had Sebastian.
	He was the one guy.
	And he could come into a room, charm people, articulate what the project was, keep everyone interested, throw in some jokes.
	I usually threw in the jokes, but you get the idea.
	Okay, you now.
	Because when they suck, people stop going to church because they're boring.
	And these kids...
	These kids aren't learning because the teacher's not interesting.
	The story of the first Anglo-War, what's it called?
	Anglo-Afghan war?
	Fuck, absolutely fascinating.
	You were fucking warlords' wives.
	First of all, how'd you seduce them?
	How'd you get to them?
	And secondly, what'd you think was going to happen?
	They're warlords.
	Go bang MS-13's wife.
	See how well that works out for you.
	Go bang a biker's broad.
	See how well you do.
	So yeah, so sorry, to get back to the original tweet, 2.9.
	She says, why are you writing a book about noodles?
	So a bunch of people go, that's stupid, you dumb bitch.
	People who weren't in history can write about the first Anglo-Afghan war.
	And so she instantly needs money.
	Anyway, therapy costs me $130 a session I'm going to need after almost 48 hours of harassment from Nazis.
	So you call someone a Nazi, which is basically what you did with the noodles.
	Everyone goes, fuck you.
	And then they're Nazis.
	Everyone's a Nazi.
	Thank you, everyone who sees what's happening.
	Tips, solidarity, heart and moment.
	Just give me free money.
	Like, you know what that comes from?
	Fatherlessness.
	When you have no dad, you have no shame.
	A dad's job is to show you not just pride, but also shame.
	It's not really a mom's job.
	A mom's job is to make you feel good and be there when you need help.
	A dad's job is to prevent you from getting into trouble.
	A mom's job is to console you when you fuck up and get in trouble.
	What's she right for?
	The AV Club refinery attorney.
	Oh, Vice.
	Of course she's Canadian.
	Anti-rape activist?
	Are there a lot of pro-rape activists?
	Oh, I thought this was fucking hilarious.
	God is doing memes now.
	And sometimes you hear about black history, especially the way it's taught in universities now, when someone has a PhD in black, in African American studies or African studies.
	It's really just angry black people bludgeoning white people with the hammer.
	And then God goes, I want to try a meme, so he does this.
	Scroll down.
	Got the picture?
	Wait.
	It's so fucking amazing.
	His shirt.
	No, go to the top.
	When you blow up that picture, does that do anything?
	Yeah.
	Thanks, God.
	Remember in Animal House where the woman, The Playboy Bunny flies through the window.
	She really fucking flies too.
	And the kid goes, Thanks, God.
	Here's God doing memes.
	I don't know what he was trying to bludgeon, but he hit the nail on the head accidentally.
	I mean, if you get a hammer through the back, it's going to crack your skull at best, lead to hemorrhaging.
	But if you really get through there and hit the brain, I'm no doctor, but that's probably real serious.
	Oh, God.
	I mean, I could do a whole show on this cunt.
	Nandini Jammy.
	So she was the girl who helped found Sleeping Giants.
	It was her.
	And she lives in Germany with her rich husband.
	And all she does is sit there in her nice house, her German mansion, and sabotage American business.
	Like, this is what I want to get at.
	I'm working on a book right now.
	And I'll give you more details later, but I want to sort of deal with anti-Semitism and how people go, look, all these people in media are Jews.
	The Jews are ruining society.
	No, high IQ affluent whites and high IQ affluent people of white culture, if you will, are sabotaging our country.
	Jews are overrepresented in medicine, too.
	It's just a high Q thing.
	High IQ media is a good job for you.
	Look at me.
	And I'm not even that smart.
	But there's so many like Jeff Bezos, Ted Turner, Lawrence O'Donnell, Chris Hayes.
	They all want to ruin America, too.
	It's what affluent whites do.
	We become lemmings, and we want us all to walk off the edge of the cliff.
	And it includes white women who happen to be Indian, like Nandini Jemmy.
	She's a perfect example of someone out to destroy America.
	Like for her, it's just a given that Breitbart News is a racist publication and anyone who advertises in it is promoting Zionism, Proud Boys, KKK racism.
	It's such a juvenile mentality.
	Holy shit.
	What's she got to say?
	This is her own reel she put together.
	I have this.
	Okay, go ahead.
	One of the most powerful websites in the United States by going after their advertisers.
	When I went on the site for the first time, I was shocked to see ads for brands and companies that I shop with.
	Once the dollars leave my wallet, where does it go?
	What happens to it?
	Who gets the money?
	What's the breakdown?
	I had a hunch, a very strong feeling, that they had no idea they were on this website.
	It turns out nobody knew, not a single brand.
	But almost across the board, they were horrified to find out.
	They thought that they could write hate.
	They were horrified that you were calling them out and you might start calling them racist.
	Like if there was a baby that had its head chopped off and they were showing a video of it, it might start with an ad.
	No one thinks the advertiser is advocating baby murder.
	No one thinks that these McDonald's loves everything Breitbart has to say.
	They know what an ad is.
	They've had magazines before.
	Their whole business model is retarded.
	It's really just about terrorizing businesses and making other right-wing, non-liberal sites go bankrupt.
	She's a saboteur.
	She's not helping the world in any way.
	And she's never experienced any racism.
	In fact, the reason she's married to that German millionaire is because he has white guilt to the point where anyone who's remotely ethnic in Germany gets blown and flown and mansioned overnight.
	Like my buddy King Khan, who went there and married a Playboy Centerfold.
	And he's a two.
	All power to him, by the way, but that's just the way it is there.
	So she is within like her marriage is affirmative action.
	On their website, send traffic to that website, and then have you pay for it.
	By the way, do you think that a company's ad dollars are yours?
	I don't think of it.
	If I buy a Snickers bar, I don't really think about Mars spending my money.
	I got my Snickers bar for my whatever they're up to now, $250.
	We're done, as Mitch Hedberg would say.
	Transaction complete.
	I don't need to file this under D for donut.
	I do not need a receipt when I buy a donut.
	I gave you a dollar.
	You gave me a donut.
	Transaction complete.
	It's not like I'm going to be walking down the street and people will say, how you doing, Mitch?
	And I'll say, good, I just had a donut.
	And then they'll say, prove it.
	Bullshit.
	Prove it.
	I have the documentation here.
	I literally have the receipts.
	16 elections.
	An anonymous Twitter account came out of nowhere and started tweeting at websites with screenshots at their own ads.
	Proud of her tattletale journalism.
	Did you know that?
	Where she sabotages business.
	It's a racist alt-right site.
	What?
	Thanks for the heads up.
	Anonymous account saying these corporations are just fucking pussies, too.
	Like one phone call.
	You know what?
	I explained that on the other show.
	Consumers' energy Twitter handle is handled by the few women they have there.
	So they have to justify their affirmative action job.
	So they run to the CEO when Sleeping Giants contacts them and go, We got a problem here, boss.
	And he goes, cancel the ad.
	Whatever makes you leave my office, do it.
	It's all fake.
	Girls play house when they're little girls.
	Now they're playing house in the market.
	You know what's some fun journalism would have been.
	If she's like, I tried to do this for left-wing sites, and the advertiser said, we stand by blah, blah, blah, blah.
	So that was an interesting thing.
	Yeah, did you know you're on a black Hebrew Israelite site that says white people are a plague on the earth and must be destroyed?
	We sure did.
	Black Lives Matter.
	That'd be fascinating.
	You know, another, I've talked about this before, but she came hard at another company.
	You know what that company was?
	Sleeping Giants.
	What?
	Like, when you go to bed with horrors, you get STDs.
	3-3.
	Remember this one?
	After woman of color co-founder accuses head.
	So she decides Sleeping Giants is racist.
	That's right.
	Everyone's racist, even my friends.
	Even the person I started this company with.
	You know who's next?
	Her.
	Nandini Jammy calls out Nandini Jammy.
	A letter of apology.
	Of course, and you know what's ironic about this?
	The same way this company is like, oh, yeah, yeah, we're not doing it anymore, Sleeping Giants is doing that too.
	They don't really believe that they gaslighted her, they just know how powerful this allegation is because it's their bread and butter.
	So when it comes to them, they know the process.
	And the process is, uh, you come across as a bitch.
	So anyway, I bring her up because she's back in the news talking about how Andy No is a violent and Islamophobic right-wing extremist.
	And it is, quote, hard to state how dangerous he is.
	I don't think I can do it.
	I don't think I have the vocabulary.
	I'll ask my German husband if he can help me.
	Maybe there's a German word like Schloofenflag.
	He's like half of Hitler plus 200 Hitlers.
	He's like you stack all the bodies of World War II plus 300 meters.
	He's like 100 meters of evil dipped in ice cream.
	Yeah, so they harassed the postmillennials advertisers, and because Andy No is getting rich, I bet Andy No, I know the post-millennial, that's the Montreal paper that's, I wouldn't even call it conservative, it's not left.
	I bet Andy No gets some token fee there to reprint his articles, and it's more just like a figurehead.
	And I bet he gets like 400 bucks a month.
	So, no, he's not getting rich off Kango.
	All you're doing is sabotaging the economy.
	In other words, like many women, the economy would be better off if you were just pulled out of it.
	You're not contributing.
	Well, I'm making less racism.
	Really?
	Andy No is a violent Islamophobic right-wing extremist who's so dangerous, it's hard to even put it into words.
	Is that really...
	Can I give you some heroin and have you go, no, I'm just bitter because I'm bored here in Germany.
	I hate it.
	My husband's accent gets on my nerves.
	I have two friends here.
	I just feel like it's a bizarre kind of a homesickness where I get involved in America and activism and I feel like I'm corresponding with people.
	They're my new family.
	I don't see my family much.
	I see his family and they're mean.
	Germans aren't very cozy, you know.
	So do you think Andy No is a violent extremist?
	No.
	No, but he's like the main guy we go to.
	He's like the gargamel for us Smurfs, so it does me a lot of good.
	I get a lot of retweets from I attack him.
	This is good smack, man.
	Hold on, I'm gonna barf.
	What's that?
	Smack music?
	Hell yeah.
	That smell?
	Oh, that smell.
	That makes me think of Puerto Ricans and Chingalings.
	Yeah.
	Ooh, that smell.
	Can't you smell that smell?
	Okay, so that segues to the war on kids, which I meant to get to earlier in the show, but we've had so much exciting stuff happen.
	Andy No is the opposite of dangerous.
	In fact, as he analyzes with a fine-tooth comb Antifa, we find more than just violent, dangerous extremists who are Americanophobic, Westophobic.
	We find that there's more than just an agenda of sabotage.
	There's an agenda of, I hate conservatives because they have values and I want a valueless society so I can fuck kids.
	Go to 3.5.
	So there's this guy, Antifa member who threatened violence.
	I notice you're not using the TriCaster where you make me small today.
	Is that on purpose?
	No, I got it.
	Antifa member who threatened violence against Andy No and celebrated death of cop works as mentor for children.
	Now, aren't you suspicious of anyone who's a mentor for children and either doesn't have kids of his own or isn't like a war vet?
	Like, what was his name?
	Zampinelli, the unbroken guy?
	Luigi Zemprinelli?
	He's got a very tough zip name.
	People need to start targeting Andy, reporting his tweets, isn't doing anything.
	Who knows where Andy lives these days?
	So he's a guy who wants you to attack journalists and violently hurt them.
	He also talks to children a lot.
	I think we're at the point where the best case scenario is that he's brainwashing children to be radical militant leftists.
	That's a good scenario here.
	The bad, of course, is that he gets kids close on his side so he can attack them.
	And that's where we are with a lot of people who deal with young kids.
	Yeah, Louis Zampurini.
	He became a mentor for kids, but he had survived World War II at its very worst and also been an Olympic athlete.
	I trust him.
	I don't trust this other fucker.
	Look at him.
	They always look like that, too.
	And they always have those shitty glasses.
	Go down.
	Andy doxes us every day.
	Why the fuck isn't Andrew's address all over Twitter?
	Why isn't there a D at his house every fucking night?
	Also, I have pigtails and I'm friendly.
	And I have little cartoon social justice fists.
	Come over to my house.
	You don't have to wear pants.
	I'm friendly and silly.
	The first fist on this shirt was white before I was done with it.
	Now it's brown.
	Yeah, that's not a black man's fist.
	That's a post-fisting fist.
	No, they're all white.
	I don't.
	Hey, little guy.
	I'm touching you.
	Wait, that's a weird way to touch a person.
	It really is, isn't it?
	Holding them by the wrist.
	What the fuck?
	Don't touch kids at all.
	Death, dead.
	Time for a new foil.
	I want Andy No to die.
	I want Andy No to die.
	I want Andy No to die.
	Antifa ride at Andy's house starts win.
	Who's Bob Murray?
	I don't know.
	Was that the guy they shot, the Patriot Prayer guy that Antifa killed?
	No.
	But go to 3.6.
	This is more of what I'm talking about.
	Again, the spectrum of young children, people around young children, is ranging from I'm brainwashing them to be rampant radical leftists full of bullshit pronouns who follow my bizarre,
	retarded Antifa ways.
	That's the best case scenario.
	And then over here, we have the worst case scenario, which is I want to fuck kids.
	And we're dealing with this.
	I don't want to be anywhere near any of those.
	I want to be way over here, which is helping kids do arts and crafts and enjoy school because it's going to get real shitty soon and hard.
	So let's make it fun.
	Basically just an arts and crafts daycare.
	That's what pre-K should be.
	There should be zero politics, zero sexuality, zero, zero gender.
	We can have sex ed in class when kids get sexual or start having weird sexual ideas, which is like 14, 15.
	I'm not saying that 14 and 15 year olds are sexually viable, but I remember at 14 it was going through my head.
	I should probably know how things work.
	That doesn't include kink.
	I'm just talking about the basic birds and the bees.
	And then they can have sex when it's legal.
	And I looked up the laws recently on sex and how young you are.
	And a 17-year-old can be with a 15-year-old.
	And I read through them all, and I was like, these seem pretty decent.
	These seem right.
	I wouldn't, if I had to rewrite the laws, they'd look pretty much the same.
	Okay, go back.
	Okay, click on the first picture.
	Zoom out.
	I think the fact that we don't see a lot of stone toss in our feeds is a good thing.
	So this guy hates stone toss comics.
	Stone Toss Comics is a very talented right-wing cartoonist who's always funny.
	And his enemies have a common thread.
	Next picture.
	I am disgusted by my past actions and what I have done.
	The disgust and guilt will stay with me so that I never do something like this again.
	I acknowledge that I hurt a lot of people through my grooming of minors.
	It was already a hat tip when we saw your avatar there, John.
	I know I should take time to reflect on what I've done so that I can fully understand the gravity and awfulness of my actions.
	I was nothing but peace and happiness for the people I have hurt.
	I wish nothing but peace and happiness for the people I have hurt.
	I want you to know that I want to be better as a human being and I'll do whatever that takes, including not raping kids.
	Thank you so much for coming out.
	This isn't an attempt at self-pity or trying to justify what I did.
	You're not trying to justify grooming minors?
	How noble.
	This is a final message to the people I have hurt.
	Victims, I'm sorry for my unforgivable actions.
	Assuming they're minors, I doubt they're reading this.
	To all the people I let down on this site, you are right to feel betrayed.
	Please don't accept or decline my apology unless you are personally affected by my actions.
	That is for the victim to decide.
	As of this tweet, my account is defunct, but I will delete it in the future.
	I wish everyone the best.
	Oh, what a sweet rapist.
	What a sweet pedophile.
	By the way, this is Bob Murray.
	He's a coal magnate and John Oliver nemesis.
	Isn't it funny?
	Like, Antifa probably loves John Oliver.
	Like, he's not that extreme and intense, but he's alright.
	He's a coal guy.
	Where do you think your electric cars come from, morons?
	They come from coal.
	I love that they're talking about Biden's mandate is to outlaw all fossil fuel cars by, I think, 2030.
	Then like a mileage tax.
	That's going to be very good for coal magnates, you dummies.
	This was another thing on the spectrum of abuse.
	This woman at a gay parade, she offers up her flat as a place where they can change.
	So these depraved, pervert, bear SNM guys change, and the kid is there as they're getting changed, and they take a picture of it, and you can pull it up any day now.
	And this is another thing Andy No is doing.
	So this saboteur, Nandini Jani, is like, I can't express how dangerous this is.
	And here's Andy No going around the world showing us dangerous situations around children.
	This won a photo prize for being iconic.
	It shows a child in the foreground while a group of men in fetish sex gear stand in the back.
	Click on that picture.
	Imagine thinking of that picture as iconic.
	I puke it.
	I don't like it.
	This is not iconic.
	This is worrying.
	And were they nude earlier?
	Did they go to a different room and they're just doing the final touches outside?
	Opened her home for the men to change.
	Yeah.
	And then I saw this thing.
	So imagine you're a chick, you're into bodybuilding, and usually I've noticed with these bodybuilding types, they love each other because they're obsessed with bodies.
	So I say women don't like six packs, and that's generally true, but women who work out do.
	It's an exception to the rule.
	So this guy marries this stud, and let's see how well it works out for her.
	Handsome guy.
	I'm jealous of his chin.
	He looks very tall, jealous of his height.
	Not don't like his bike.
	Look, they're very kind of jersey shore-ish, kind of trashy, sexy.
	Very typical bodybuilding looks.
	They're having some laughs.
	Oh, they get married?
	That's great.
	Congratulations.
	Look how happy they are.
	Very healthy man.
	Uh-oh.
	Uh-oh.
	No, they got a kid?
	Okay, I guess that's good.
	Nice marriage.
	Looks like a beautiful wedding.
	We don't have any pictures of my wedding.
	What?
	What?
	Whoa, what?
	No, no, no.
	What happened?
	What?
	Nice music.
	Everything I do, I do for me.
	I do it for you.
	I want to be a woman.
	Women are too agreeable.
	This is terrible.
	I mean, if my wife just cut her tits off and put a piece of her forearm, a little cheese blints in her crotch, and said, I'm a dude now, and grew one of those stupid lesbian beards, I'd be furious.
	The fuck have you done?
	If something happens to her against your will, like her legs fall off, I'll stand by her.
	But you purposely made your legs fall off.
	What is she doing?
	Like, how do they fuck?
	Weirdly.
	So she's obviously into men, right?
	She married a bodybuilder.
	And now she's looking up as she gets plowed and there's these tits jiggling and like her husband's face, but clean-shaven with fake eyelashes on and just like purple hair going.
	Isn't that rape?
	They rock paper scissors for who gets to be on the bottom.
	Yeah.
	I would assume she prefers doggy style now.
	Can we do exclusively doggy?
	Your tits kind of trip me out.
	Look how many filters and everything he looks to look sort of not incredibly disgusting.
	Dude.
	And I checked out his Twitter feed.
	A lot of his like, feels good to finally be passing after so many years of just on the edge.
	And then he's like, before and after?
	This is me three years ago.
	This is me now.
	They're the same picture.
	Look, that's exactly what I'm talking about.
	You mean that you had your nails did?
	Is that what's happening here?
	Because you're the same fucking dude.
	25 years apart.
	If I had known then what I know now, I wonder how things might have been different.
	Total regrets, though?
	0%.
	Yeah, because you have this wife who is too agreeable and tolerates your shit.
	That's what she married, and that's what she's with now.
	He's making gains.
	It's a perversion, and it's seeping into our schools.
	I'm going to do a green screen about this in a second, though.
	Oof.
	Definitely preferred like the long-hair one to just the dude with long nails.
	Yeah, that was a weird phase, right?
	Yeah, that's...
	Was that step one?
	We're normalizing mental illness.
	And no one really cares, although I care about his daughter, but no one really cares what they do.
	It's now that it's getting near with teachers and kids and this weird LGBT pronoun made-up bullshit where anything goes is seeping into their world.
	And that's why I'm getting concerned.
	Go to 3-9.
	Sorry, wait, now go back.
	She gets fucked by that.
	Do you need to cover your tits with hair, dude?
	They're not tits, so go ahead.
	Yeah.
	It's not offensive.
	Men can be shirt topless.
	It's okay.
	I mean, that's like a weird centaur.
	She's getting fucked by a weird mythical beast, literally.
	He's in a labyrinth chasing.
	Remember Zeus?
	Like in Greek, whatever you call them, tails?
	Mythology?
	Mythology, yeah.
	He would come down and be a goose and fuck someone.
	Right.
	That's what...
	She's getting fucked by Zeus.
	He would come down as a man-woman centaur beast.
	Tattooed, bodybuilding, hot chick, hot dude combination.
	Same guy.
	He probably would like that description.
	Oh, my God.
	I love it.
	Gosh.
	By the way, I have a scoop.
	I should have said breaking news.
	Speaking of lies, I was at Subway today after boxing, and I said, my sandwich is brilliant.
	And feel free to copy this.
	Italian BMT, Italian bread.
	6 inch, 12 inch, depending on how hungry you are.
	I'd recommend 6 inches.
	12 inches is too much.
	That's what she said.
	And you wind up eating the whole thing.
	You say you're going to eat half.
	You go like to 70% and you're like, what am I doing?
	This is hell.
	Provolone cheese, toasted, comes out.
	Tomatoes, lettuce, pickles, banana peppers, jalapenos.
	I think we're done.
	I said tomatoes and lettuce, right?
	Now what else do you want it?
	Normal mayonnaise, honey mustard, oil and vinegar.
	Not salt.
	You got enough salt out of the deli meats.
	Now just black pepper.
	And she put light mayonnaise on, and I said, I meant real mayonnaise.
	I said real mayonnaise.
	She goes, it's the same thing.
	Scoop of the century.
	Move over Watergate.
	Move over Subway tuna controversy.
	Yeah.
	Light mayonnaise is just mayonnaise.
	You know, that's really messed up for a company that just did the Eat Fresh Refresh, where they redid their entire menu.
	They added the calorie.
	If you're eating light mayonnaise at Subway and you don't know why you're not losing weight, it's because you are being force-fed normal mayonnaise.
	Just like the Lindsay Lohan scam in Mean Girls, where she gave her that weight loss stuff and it was actually fattening paste.
	This is worse than the Subway Jared child molesting.
	Hey, if I commit suicide in the next few days, I didn't commit suicide.
	Gavin McInnes didn't kill himself.
	Subway did.
	You know what I'm ashamed to admit?
	I've worked for a place that said the low-sodium soy sauce was any different from the regular soy sauce.
	I'm sorry.
	So scoop that.
	Subway.
	The corruption in the fast food industry is shocking.
	And that wasn't even fast food.
	You were working at a Japanese restaurant.
	Correct.
	This goes all the way to the top, folks.
	That's right.
	This isn't just Subway tuna, Subway mayonnaise.
	This is Japanese soy sauce.
	Oh, and don't forget Chinese restaurants have rats.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Don't forget.
	You will eat different meats than chicken.
	Okay, so go to 3.9.
	This is turning out to be a long app.
	How about this for the tweet of the century?
	Hey, legal peeps.
	So we're in a fun tone.
	This is going to be a fun thing.
	Is it about light mayonnaise?
	No.
	By the way, that mayonnaise thing is the clip of the day.
	Okay.
	Clip of the year, more like.
	But include the whole thing right up to this tweet.
	But don't include this tweet.
	So go back to the tweet.
	Hey, legal peeps.
	What kind of waiver slash release would I need to create a safe space to talk to youth about kink away from their parents?
	Hashtag sext.
	The reactions to this were pretty good.
	They were like, jail, death, jail, fucking, go to hell.
	But, I mean, why are you trying to get a waiver?
	Why don't you call all the parents?
	And have any of these people met a kid?
	They don't talk about sex.
	In fact, they're so averse to any discussion.
	When they get to be 11 or something, or actually, most of their life with my boys, I can go, so do you have a girlfriend?
	And it's an instant like, shut up.
	It's a way to tease a kid.
	Even at 13, you go, so who's your girlfriend?
	And they go, shut up.
	Like, it's the thing they want to talk about the least.
	Yeah.
	Kink.
	Like, my sex life was always pretty normal.
	Lost my Virginia at 17.
	It was a struggle from like 17, well into college.
	It's probably different for you kids today because of porn.
	But it was not like, yeah, let's fucking rock.
	It was a negotiation.
	Come on, come on.
	Get your radio on.
	It's four o'clock and I won't be long tonight.
	Let the jumbo make the jumbo.
	Grabbing an ass, getting your pants off.
	I would say around like 23, 24 was when girls were finally like, all right, let's get down to brass tacks.
	It's time to rock.
	Maybe that's because I had started vice at that point.
	And then 24, 25, 26 was just finally women's libidos had caught up to mine.
	I would say like 27, I was like, how about you put these high heels on?
	Or how about we tie you up?
	Or how about you say this rude thing or I smack your ass around and get a little rough?
	That's like late 20s.
	She's talking about five-year-olds.
	So who here's into shit play?
	I made a mud pie.
	That's good.
	That's close.
	Click on the email I sent you after I sent you the notes.
	This is the kind of kink I'm into now.
	Jeez.
	That's custard.
	So what I like to do, I do this to my wife all the time, and you can do this too.
	That's why I included this video so you could see.
	So I wrap her up in cellophane, right?
	And then I put this rubber head thing on her, and I fill it up with porridge.
	No.
	What do you call it?
	Curry coconut.
	So that's what you guys are doing when I...
	Yeah.
	Because I went to visit you one time.
	I like it to go to the very, very top, though.
	That was custard.
	Oh, okay.
	Custard, yeah.
	I fill it up with custard.
	That's not my wife.
	This is another guy who I told how to do it, and he's showing me this video.
	So then I put on her high heels, and I get it full 100%.
	I screw in the top, right?
	And then I screw on this sort of fulcrum.
	Yeah.
	It goes on a disc that surrounds her.
	So now she can't move at all.
	And this is where it gets horny.
	I didn't stick around for this part.
	She's coming like a freight train right now.
	I love the way freight trains come.
	They're just so...
	Can I be totally honest?
	I do have a slight tingling of the...
	No, you don't.
	Not because that turns me on, but that she's found her thing and she's getting turned on.
	You know what I mean?
	It would take a while to find her thing.
	Yeah, that's what I thought when I saw it.
	I was like, how'd you get here?
	Like, you tried porridge once.
	Yeah.
	She tried it with light custard and that, and he told her it was light custard, but it was actually.
	What was the first iteration of this?
	Like, he just sort of rolled her down a hill.
	And she's like, that would be better if I had custard around me.
	Trial and error.
	The free market of kink brought them there.
	Anyway, that's kink.
	That's obviously very extreme kink.
	Spanking a lady's bottom is normal kink.
	And you get spanking bottoms.
	In my day in your late 20s, I don't know about you with all your porn bullshit.
	It's probably way too young, but it's not five.
	Anyway, that inspired me to do a quick green screen on a new segment I'm doing for one day only called Neurodivergent Preschool Teachers.
	These are the teachers who are with your kids.
	So do you have those videos?
	I do.
	Hit the jungle.
	Hit the jungle.
	How's the sound?
	We're good.
	Prit's good?
	Okay, let's just start at the top.
	Okay, this is someone teaching kids.
	Now, can you hear me okay?
	Yep.
	What I find disturbing about this is she's got all her mumbo jumbo crazy bullshit pronouns crap.
	And then a supervisor comes and they see how brainwashed the kids are and the supervisor is very impressed.
	Story time.
	This has been my first year in preschool with a class of my own teaching alongside another queer neurodivergent educator and we have been rocking.
	Queer and neurodivergent educator.
	I don't know who needs to hear this, but those are not words that anyone in America knows.
	Go outside right now and say, what does neurodivergent mean?
	I assume from the etymology that it's got something to do with brains, and I guess you diverge from...
	That's not good to diverge from your brain, by the way.
	So I guess the divergency is, I was born male and I'm not male.
	I am different than what my brain.
	You sound like, I mean, it sounds like another way of saying mentally ill.
	Neurodivergent.
	Your brain is splitting.
	You're going away from your brain.
	To this class, We've been talking about gender and skin color and consent and empathy and our bodies and autonomy.
	Stop, stop.
	You can talk about your bodies.
	You definitely don't want kids to get molested.
	Make sure kids know that their body is 100% theirs and no one has the right to touch it without your permission.
	You hug your mommy, but you don't hug strangers.
	That's very cool.
	But like race, you want to do the opposite.
	You don't want kids knowing about race.
	Hey guys, I want you to know that America's been really racist.
	And there was a guy who was falsely accused of raping a woman, so the Klan beat him to death.
	They hanged him.
	He looked just like Joey over here.
	In fact, he looked like Joey's dad.
	And here is a picture of him hanging from a tree.
	This was in 1893.
	Who can see that?
	Who can see that?
	What the fuck are you doing?
	Getting racism in their heads.
	Your goal as an educator is to get sex, to delay sex as long as possible, race as long as possible, 9-11 as long as possible, and Santa as long as possible.
	I don't want those kids knowing about that for as long as possible.
	Fabulous.
	But our teaching team is shifting and a new person is being onboarded, someone with many years of experience.
	So today at the lunch table, when...
	Someone got fired for their incompetence.
	You see, the other thing about these people, and one of the reasons they hate meritocracy, is they're lazy.
	So her other neurodivergent partner is a shitty, lazy, pothead lesbian who's fired.
	In fact, I just heard the other night about these cops who are one of the lesbians who is now called a man.
	And the cops I talk to, no matter what the precinct, seem very tolerant about all this shit.
	Because it's not uncommon in the police force for a lesbian to say she's a man.
	And they're like, no, he's, and they use the pronouns, like, he's a good guy.
	He's a really good guy.
	Anyway, she fell in love with some other, her lesbian lover who happens to be on the same precinct, the same, whatever you call it.
	And she got fired because she was so madly in love with her, she wasn't doing her patrols.
	That's what happened with this chick.
	I guarantee it.
	She fell in love with this chick and is fired.
	She's like, I need to be with you.
	Anyway, she's leaving that little detail out.
	Many years of experience.
	So today at the lunch table, when the topic of gender and genitals came up, one of our students plainly looked up and said, well, I'm a girl today, but I know that Teacher Ko isn't.
	No, they're Envy.
	And the look on the incoming...
	Look at her weird blood-stained hands.
	Were you just sacrificing children?
	The teacher, so the little kid says, look at her maniacal face too.
	This is a deranged person around kids.
	They said, I feel like a girl today.
	They're telling their kids about genitals.
	Your kids should know about, the only thing kids should know about genitals is you shouldn't pee on the toilet seat.
	Make sure that every drop comes out before you put your penis back in your underwear.
	And the dad should handle that discussion.
	But now the supervisor is impressed that the kid knows what MB means.
	What the fuck does MB mean?
	Oh, non-binary.
	It's an abbreviation, Nenbi.
	Right?
	MB?
	I think so.
	Who fucking cares?
	Now I'm trying to learn their stupid made-up fake astrology language.
	Astrology is more legit than this bullshit.
	And astrology is bullshit.
	Look on the incoming teacher's face was priceless.
	She was shocked in a good way.
	And she just looked around at the two of us and said, this class is incredible.
	And I am so impressed.
	Squee.
	So that's pretty concerning that not only do we have, these are not outliers.
	Not only do we have a lunatic teacher, but when her boss comes to check and sees how brainwashed the kids are, she goes, perfect, amazing.
	You get an A plus in asshole.
	Oh, this one is a really good one.
	And this chick puts up a lot of videos.
	Actually, she describes herself as Mix.
	M-X.
	Not Miss, not Mr. Mix.
	Sounds a lot like Mix.
	Okay, guys, I can't.
	This is too funny.
	So I'm at work.
	And those of you who don't know me, I use they, them pronouns.
	And I'm a preschool teacher.
	So instead of using Mr. or Miss, we use Mix.
	So the kids have been really awesome doing that.
	I work with three and four year olds.
	One of my kiddos came up to me and he goes, are you mixed up?
	Are you mixed up?
	I was like, no, sweetie, I'm not mixed up.
	I just use mix instead of Mr. or Mrs. And he's like, okay, I was worried.
	Okay, guys, I can't.
	You know what that is?
	That's God doing memes again.
	That's just like the black history guy.
	Some naive kid came up to her and said, are you mixed up?
	Yeah, you are.
	He's not naive.
	You are.
	He's not getting your stupid mix wrong.
	He is correctly summarizing, whether accidentally or not, the situation.
	And the situation is you're severely mixed up.
	You're insane.
	You're a mentally ill lesbian.
	And I'm not saying gays and lesbians can't be preschool teachers, but this lesbian sure can't.
	She's nuts.
	If you believe in made-up gobbledygook, you should not be doing pre-K.
	They're all pre-K for some reason.
	Go to that same Twitter feed, because she has another one where she's so happy.
	I think it's a few down from that one.
	That they were in class and they were all talking about how much Trump sucks and she was so proud of her kiddos.
	What?
	Why did pre-K kids know who Trump is?
	Yeah, that's it.
	Turn it up.
	It's awesome.
	So, guys, I love my job.
	It's awesome.
	So today, like every single classroom had the inauguration on and had some form of happy get The fuck out song going on.
	It was a huge party.
	So many people had on what were the shirts?
	Chucks and pearls.
	Chucks and pearls shirts on.
	And they were wearing chucks and they were wearing pearls.
	And you're going the wrong way.
	I love it.
	It's awesome.
	It's so nice to be in a work environment where I feel welcome and I feel safe.
	It's great.
	So this is a preschool teacher that's ecstatic.
	Her students, her young students, hate the...
	I'd be bummed because I can tell you're nuts.
	Anyway, next.
	Ecstatic, her students hate the President of the United States.
	Good teaching.
	Remember standing up for the flag?
	That was a big thing.
	Standing up for the national anthem.
	You usually have that particular president on the wall at the time.
	Now it's the opposite.
	You have to hate the president.
	Now this nut bar, her story is that she misgendered a student and she can't believe it.
	She's pretending it's a big deal.
	You can tell she doesn't think it's a big deal.
	And the other really irritating thing about this dumb bitch is she's got hand tattoos and she's so proud of them, they're so badass, that she has to sort of make sure she does all these gestures where they get into every shot.
	Guys, I messed up.
	I messed up.
	So I had a kid on Monday.
	They said their pronouns were she, her.
	Then on Wednesday, yesterday, they came to me and they said, you know what?
	My pronouns are they, them.
	I want you in the class to use they, them.
	Okay, cool, great.
	They come to class today.
	There's names on desks in groups for assigned seats.
	They can't find theirs because I guess my first class knocked it off.
	So I go to the class.
	Hey, is she in anyone's group?
	Does anyone see her name?
	It took me five minutes to remember.
	There were hand tattoos in there.
	So someone asked a question yesterday.
	What do you do when you mess up?
	Well, we all mess up.
	So what I did when they were sitting by themselves, I approached them and said, I screwed up, didn't I?
	And they said, yep.
	And I said, I am so sorry.
	That is completely 100% my fault.
	I apologize.
	I will not get it wrong moving forward.
	You know, please know I heard you when you told me your pronouns and I will get it right.
	That was totally my bad.
	I apologize.
	So that's what you do.
	You own it.
	You apologize.
	You know, they, you know, they were happy that I came over to them.
	They were disappointed in me.
	I just saw the look of disappointment and I was like so disappointed in myself.
	But we just get better.
	We learn.
	We grow, get better.
	I will not F it up again There's two things going on there one It's very clear from her body language that she's being totally insincere.
	She doesn't think it was a big screw-up.
	She doesn't care.
	No one cares.
	It's all fake these pronoun shit.
	But secondly, she was bragging that pronouns are a thing in her class.
	It's accepted.
	In fact, all the kids there are more adamant about this silly jargon than she is.
	And that's her victory.
	So what you were really watching there is a mentally ill lesbian with stupid tattoos bragging that she has successfully brainwashed her students.
	And that is what early education is becoming in America today.
	And at best, it's brainwashing our kids.
	And at worst, it's grooming them.
	You know what I just realized?
	I don't answer my phone because I've been doxed so many times.
	So unless I recognize the number, I don't pick it up.
	And I tell people to text me.
	But I'd be getting all these weird calls from like I just got one when we were doing that from Murfreesboro, Arizona.
	Bethany United, Manteo, North Carolina.
	Oops.
	Syracuse, New York.
	Fairport, New York.
	I think my parents are so cheap.
	They got rid of first their landline, but now their cell phone.
	And now they've got on their $100 Google Chrome computers.
	Oh, shall I turn this off?
	Yeah.
	They've got probably some dumb software that's free with a bunch of pop-up ads.
	And it's calling me.
	And so I don't pick it up because it probably bounces all over the fucking country through Zoom and Skype or some shit.
	Having cheap Scottish parents is very frustrating.
	It's too much indecence.
	It is way too much indecence.
	Okay, we're out of time, folks.
	Let's squeeze in a mailbag and a final video.
	Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dad.
	Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag.
	Let me touch it.
	Whoa, we got a lot of letters since we started shooting the show.
	Oh no, I know what's going on.
	My computer, I've had this computer since 2007.
	That's not good.
	Why?
	Because I'm cheap.
	That's nuts.
	I bought you a new computer.
	That's correct.
	Yeah, I got to get a new computer.
	This is for 20 years.
	Yeah, man.
	I'll get one for you if you want.
	2007.
	That's nuts.
	It should not.
	14 years.
	You shouldn't expect it to work properly.
	No, Well, they say hard drives have like a what is it, a seven-year life?
	That's scary.
	I've doubled the life.
	My buddy has a Chihuahua that's the equivalent of 100, no, it's 20 years old.
	And I looked up on the Guinness Book of World Records, I go, dude, that's the world record.
	And he goes, That's, I don't know if it's a pure Chihuahua.
	And I go, who?
	You've got to call Guinness.
	Yeah, yeah, call him.
	And he goes, why?
	Is there money in it for me?
	I go, I don't, maybe.
	But don't you just want it documented?
	You, Doug, have the oldest chihuahua on earth.
	If you don't report that, then you're not letting your dog get the greatness that it deserves.
	Yeah.
	You're holding it back.
	And every time he feeds it, it just shits itself.
	So we're coming to the end of its rope, clearly.
	You know what it is?
	Seven times two is 14.
	It's 140 years old.
	You know what it is?
	What, man?
	I'm trying to do that hand tattoo chick.
	That grosses me out so much.
	She's like John Cena, but like a woman kind of with poofing.
	Well, what she is, is she's always been ugly.
	And now she's been an outcast being a lesbian.
	But now that she's a lesbian, that sort of makes her less ugly.
	And then now that she has the tattoo, she's finally kind of cool.
	So she makes, because when people see her, they go, oh, a fat, ugly nerd.
	And she goes, no, fat, ugly, lesbian.
	And then she goes, with tats, so I'm kind of cool.
	No, you're still a fat, ugly nerd.
	Fuck.
	That teacher was.
	Well, I brainwashed my kids.
	All right, that's pretty good.
	You're in the club.
	But you know what it is?
	She's probably afraid if the dog gets famous, it'll forget about him, you know, be traveling the world, invited to parties.
	No, it's a guy.
	It's Doug from my old band, 80s Hardcore.
	Yeah, he's probably...
	He doesn't want to be outshined by the dog, and I get it.
	Detective Shitty strikes again, folks, with yet another terrible theory.
	I have a bumper for that.
	He's lazy and weird, and he doesn't care about anything.
	He's been buying and selling records his entire adult life.
	The guy is not exactly trying to get on the map.
	Anyway, Dear Gavin and Rye Guy seems the media once again blames the Proud Boys over Antifa coming to one of their events.
	It was known, and they chose to start something, Antifa did.
	First article is not horrible to the Proud Boys, but quotes the SPLC and also sells Antifa as fighting for the gays.
	It just reinforces the Proud Boys as neo-Nazis.
	The second shows people already wary of the Proud Boys and suggesting someone needs to police it.
	Bring in the Antifa mob.
	The fourth link, third article is by The Guardian explaining the shots.
	As they're liberal, it's the most bias telling.
	And the fourth link is him shooting.
	Look how fast they shot back at him.
	He was being chased and a gun brandished at him.
	It was self-defense.
	So what's the first one?
	Newsweek?
	Sue Kim.
	Okay?
	I'm not very litigious.
	Otherwise, I would.
	I'm going to sue Kim.
	I'll bet you anything, Sue Kim's a little kid who just came out of college and is doing this because they had to fill their diversity quotas.
	And so, of course, she's hiding her face.
	Oh, here she is.
	LinkedIn.
	Telegraph.
	Yeah, I got her.
	Translator, Korea expert, senior reporter.
	Actually, she doesn't look that young.
	This reminds me of something like a career report.
	The Telegraph, eight years.
	Okay, sorry.
	So go back.
	No, no, go back to Newsweek.
	Antifa is short for anti-fascist.
	That's always a big tell if they call them anti-fascist protesters or even justify that stupid name.
	And then go down.
	It just marked the latest in a series of violent confrontations.
	It's been a center for clashes.
	You see, no mention of how it was a Christian group that was basically running and hiding and finally found a parking lot and Antifa chasing them down.
	Like, that's not reporting.
	Oh, go back up again?
	Look at the similar articles.
	Gunfire erupts as Proud Boys and Antifa clash.
	This is why I was so against the January 6th meandering.
	I said, it's the last two have said, Proud Boys go to D.C., stabbing ensues.
	No mention that it was Proud Boys who are being stabbed.
	So if you go and there's a shooting, it's going to be Proud Boys go to D.C., a shooting ensues.
	This is exactly what that headline says.
	Look at this, too.
	It's like, well, like, this Proud Boy is a crybaby pussy because the police didn't protect him.
	But then again, they'll be like, the police are in bed with Proud Boys.
	So it's like five different realities happening at once.
	Yeah, yeah.
	And what's the second one?
	Like, they're evil shooting people, but they're scared, and then they're protected by police that aren't protecting them.
	What?
	Will Yamette Week?
	Three days ahead of Portland Proud Boys gathering.
	It wasn't a Portland Proud Boys gathering.
	It was a Christian event that Proud Boys went to do security.
	Practical details of police response remain a mystery.
	Wait, while the 50 or so rapid response team officers resigned en masse from the unit, so these were cops who were Proud Boys?
	They slated to converge.
	The police bureau is actively planning for the weekend and we'll have information to share tomorrow.
	So the beef here is that the police aren't doing enough to what, stop the Christian group from meeting?
	That's what that black dude was saying about communism.
	And then finally, The Guardian, which is the worst.
	I wonder if it's...
	Oh, it's Jason Wilson.
	That's the guy who's had it out for me ever since I made fun of his shitty teeth.
	We were at a Tommy Robinson thing in Midtown.
	And he goes, hello, I'm from The Guardian, UK.
	And I'm like, I know you're from the UK.
	I can tell by your teeth.
	And he's been like the resident Proud Boy expert ever since.
	Hundreds clash in Portland as Proud Boy's rally descends into violence.
	Running street battle ends in gunfight after protests in a parking lot.
	A right-wing protest in Portland, no, has culminated in a gunfight when anti-fascist demonstrators return fired a man who shot at them with the handgun.
	Yeah, why did he shoot at them?
	Because they were chasing him with a gun.
	Like, this guy's not even near Portland.
	See, no one believes this anymore.
	That's what's amazing about all these articles.
	They used to make me so frustrated because I'd go, that's not what happened.
	And now I just know that people read this and roll their eyes outside of the radical left.
	This one's called The Most On-the-Nose Anti-USA Propaganda on Netflix.
	I just watched this Netflix sci-fi movie, The Shadow of the Moon.
	And Ryan, we're looking at your screen, you fucking idiot.
	And a black woman goes back in time to kill innocent white people who read about the founding fathers.
	This is done to prevent a white supremacist movement that ends the world.
	I'm fucking serious.
	It's ridiculous.
	By the way, person writing in, don't put in two spaces after a period.
	That's amateur hour.
	They do it in legal letters.
	That's the only place it's acceptable.
	In the final scene, she says, I came back to correct a big mistake.
	Some thoughts are better left buried.
	And while she's saying that, a white supremacist guy sitting in front of a modified Blue Lives Matter flag bleeds out onto a George Washington book.
	What the fuck?
	It's so blatantly anti-USA and anti-white.
	Is that the whole movie or just the trailer?
	Whole movie.
	Well, show the trailer, numbnuts.
	I want to see this scene.
	Sorry.
	I can't see shit.
	It's a dark-ass movie.
	Play the trailer.
	This is what happens if you don't arrest Prowboys and throw them in jail for four years for fighting.
	You know, these chunks of brain.
	Yep, we solved that one, Crockett.
	Yeah, what about that?
	Injection sites deep enough to impact the vertebrae.
	No one's ever seen it before.
	Suspect is a black female, 5'6, 20s, dried blood on her left hand, wearing a blue hooded sweatshirt.
	Hello, Thomas.
	Is this where it happens?
	I'm here on location in Center City on the nine-year anniversary of the Market Street murder.
	Those gathered here believe the Philadelphia police aren't to blame.
	Detective Lockhart, yes, hello.
	What do you mean?
	It's happening again.
	Hey, Tom.
	Nice to see you again.
	It's a cop murder fantasy, which means that there's a large contingent of America and Nepfictiers that fantasize about killing cops.
	That's where we're at, folks.
	All this propaganda is bled into people's fantasies.
	So that's what I hate about all this bullshit.
	It starts changing the American psyche.
	And they're starting with our kids.
	All right, that's enough of that shit.
	We'll do more letters tomorrow.
	This is the last one.
	Trump 4D chess.
	Here is his theory.
	Russia deadly vaccine.
	Lose an obviously rigged election so your supporters don't trust the government at all.
	Let the other side, now in power, push the vaccine on their supporters.
	All the vaccs die off.
	Win the 2024 election.
	100 to 0.
	Don't show the letters, Ryan.
	This is the thing he's reading.
	What?
	It's an image that you're reading.
	I know.
	Don't show that.
	People don't need to see what I'm reading.
	Imagine you're watching the news and the teleprompter appeared behind the guy.
	It doesn't matter if it's in picture form.
	Vax die-off.
	Win the 2024 election, 100-0 with your entire base intact and all the lefties gone.
	Make America great again.
	That is a detective shitty level theory, sir.
	Isn't like 60% of the country vaxed?
	So Trump, what is Trump?
	Fucking Thanos?
	He's killing 170 million people so he can win the election?
	That doesn't make America very great to kill everyone's relative, friends?
	No.
	Pretty, pretty, pretty terrible idea.
	All right, let's get to the final video.
	We're over the two-hour mark.
	Okay, this is from one of our favorites, Mr. Chris Angel.
	5-8.
	There are two options in this video.
	One, and there are no other options.
	One, living in Vegas has turned Chris Angel into a brutal cokehead, and we're watching his career collapse before our very eyes.
	The other possibility is that living in Vegas has turned Chris Angel into a brutal meth head, and we're watching his career collapse before our very eyes.
	Coke or meth.
	That's not a sober person.
	I'm Chris, and this sucks.
	That's fake.
	See that guy?
	Banachin?
	He's like 61 years old.
	He was like a...
	He was like some dude who refuted psychics like in the 70s.
	That's how you know that you're really a drug addict when you have these weird hangers on who were famous a quarter of a century ago.
	The thing that is weird to me is what's the significance of the cockroach?
	I used to eat cockroaches when I was a kid.
	No.
	Pause.
	That's not a real tattoo.
	She did not eat cockroaches when she was a kid.
	He does not have a cockroach in his mouth right now.
	Oh.
	I did.
	You ate cockroaches.
	No, you didn't, and you have no lips.
	You know, cockroaches multiply, so if you ate a cockroach, you might have like, I don't know, like a thousand in your body right now.
	That's disgusting.
	I try something.
	Yeah, not eating a roach is disgusting.
	That's disgusting.
	Cockroach isn't in his mouth.
	These meth heads don't care that he just did a hard cut.
	Now a cockroach is in his mouth.
	And what did we hear?
	Look, the fake tattoo is gone.
	Get me out of the way.
	Oh, oh my god.
	Oh my god!
	Oh my god!
	Oh my god, that is disgusting.
	Oh shit!
	These are the girls he does meth with in Fox.
	He said, girls, you want to go do some magic?
	That I believe is real.
	That's cool, that goldfish tat.
	Watch.
	Oh my, what are you doing?
	So he's going to eat her tattoo too?
	Does anyone believe that a magic guy can make a tattoo disappear?
	This is like on Halloween when we were werewolves and we went, we got to stop.
	No one thinks that we're werewolves.
	It's so bad.
	It's like Polish.
	Isn't this like what you'd expect at a Kazakhstan?
	So I guess they have a way to de sting them.
	Wait, what was that last one?
	There's no intro.
	It just had a scorpion come out of her mouth?
	Yeah.
	Wait, I got to see that.
	So we go from goldfish to.
	You can have the goldfish.
	Your tattoo's gone.
	Oh my god, it's so badly set up and everything, too.
	At least with David Blaine, when he like stitches up his mouth or pulls a frog out of his mouth, you know there's no such thing as magic.
	But at least it makes you go, huh?
	Maybe you stitched it up first, then you had the frog.
	Not with this.
	They're not in the same league.
	But he's not in the same league as magicians.
	Right.
	He's in the same league as meth heads.
	Yeah.
	What a fucking loser.
	He's sub-Stevo.
	Sub-Stevo.
	My eldest boy is so old that he's a teenager now.
	And he goes, he's got a deep voice.
	Which is so weird because I still remember the little four-year-old who, when his water bottle leaked in his lunchbox on his granola bar, he goes, ah, my waddy body weak to my Benoli body.
	Or my crickety cricket tattoo.
	Cause I go, what's Pinocchio's friend's name that's a bug?
	He goes, how many times do I have to tell you this?
	Quickety Quicket.
	He's pissed.
	Yeah.
	And then he became like six or seven and he goes, Dad, I got some bad news.
	You know your tattoo I got at Wong.
	It's Jiminy Quicket.
	I'm showy about it.
	I'm so showy.
	And now he's like, he sends me a Steve-O interview where he's talking about when he was a meth head, he would send emails to everyone.
	And he's like, do you have any of those emails?
	And I go, yeah, I got them all saved.
	Nice.
	Hey, Gavin, it's me, Steve-O.
	I glued my balls to my balls, dude.
	Wait, is it not on this computer?
	Rad email.
	It was called Stevo's Rad Email.
	Oh, I'm looking in the mailbag.
	It was called Steve-O's Rad Email List, and he wouldn't BCC anyone.
	So you could see...
	You could see like Mike Judge's email or PJ Clapp's email.
	Uh-oh.
	It's not showing up on my inbox, broad.
	Maybe it's not sales for you to do that.
	Shoot.
	Okay, I'll look up that for next episode.
	I was sure I had them saved.
	Fuck.
	So yeah.
	Everything woke turns to shit, and it's looking like America is going woke.
	That includes pre-K, and we should care because we don't want our kids brainwashed, and we certainly don't want them molested.
	So get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.

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