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Dec. 24, 2020 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

02:18:00

GOML LIVE #79 - MERRY CHRISTMAS!

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	I cut that short because the fucking copyright shit on that must be mental.
	Mental.
	Don't hang your coat on the lights in the studio.
	That's a coat rack now?
	You get so much shit everywhere.
	That was Merry Christmas War is Over by John Lennon in 1971, a year after I was born.
	The beginning of the song, he says, Merry Christmas, Julian.
	Let's hear what Trump has to say about Christmas.
	I will build a great, great wall.
	Well, I hope it doesn't get taken down.
	Yeah, that was in his hippy-dippy peace and love thing that everyone was into back when I was born.
	Then he went off, divorced Oko, Yoko, and was with a four named Tammy Yang or something.
	It's called his Lost Weekend.
	Amy Chan.
	You should be looking that up.
	What are you doing?
	The current card, I need to make space on the second card because it's a two-hour show.
	I gotta get two cards.
	I didn't know he.
	That's really weird.
	I didn't know he divorced Yoko.
	Yoko was never, like, you're in the Beatles, dude.
	You should be getting a chick that burns her eyes off.
	He liked Ronnie Specter.
	She was cute.
	Does your camera work?
	It crapped out.
	Oh, it already stopped.
	We're missing a cord.
	Yeah.
	No, I don't think those round glasses worked very well.
	Yeah, we're not talking about his first wife, buddy.
	We're talking about his mistress, girlfriend, during his lost weekend phase, Amy Chan.
	Anyway, then he didn't really do anything from 73 to 75, 72 to 75.
	And then he got back with Yoko, made, yeah, that's her.
	She looks pretty good there, I gotta admit.
	But he went back with Yoko, made Sean Lennon, who's an awesome dude.
	And then he made this song.
	And sorry, sorry, 71 was the beginning of all this.
	Then he made that album with her that has all those hits.
	Like, what's the one with...
	Give Peace a Chance.
	Give Peace a Chance?
	That's the Beatles, you fucking piece of human garbage.
	Why are you interjecting stuff when you have nothing to say?
	I could have sworn.
	No, we played on the show the other day.
	He ends it with, good night, Sean.
	Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful boy.
	It's got some good hits.
	And then some weirdo from Hawaii came and shot and killed him.
	This is the end of the Christmas stuff.
	We've been wearing Christmas sweaters every day.
	I don't think this one turns on.
	I've had Christmas sweaters all week that turn on.
	And we're leaving you.
	After this, we're going on vacation, but do not fret.
	We have jam-packed entertainment the entire time we're gone.
	And if you want to rob the studio, this is a great time to do it.
	We will not be here tomorrow.
	The alarm will be on, but by the time you grab everything, you could probably get out of here.
	Can you show the ads I made for all the stuff we have coming up?
	I think it's a separate email I sent you earlier today.
	Gotcha.
	Not that you ever check your email.
	Oh, fuck.
	I do not.
	We're not off to a great start.
	It's weird to have a beer when you're really, really thirsty.
	It feels wrong.
	Like you should be having Gatorade or water if you're really, really thirsty.
	And then you have beers.
	This should not be quenching your thirst.
	Make sure you show them in order.
	But before we get to that, what we're doing when we're gone, let's talk about our oldest sponsor, Johnny Apple CBD.
	This episode is brought to you by Johnny Apple CBD, our official proud CBD.
	Johnny Apple has been using us, has been with us since the beginning.
	We've been using it since the beginning.
	jacbd.com enter promo code gavin for 20 off all orders that's jacbd.com promo code gavin 20 off all orders and again you put the tincture in your coffee it takes the edge off you got sore muscles from working out too much you had a leg day and it hurts to sit down get the topicals on your sore muscles they help you got the uh the gummies help you sleep the stem vaporizer is a fun
	way to take it in that we've got the cookies the cartridges the isolates and wax the supplements and you could even get some for your pet that's johnnyapple.com johnnyapplecbd.com they both work and that is 20 off all orders we're turning into infowars with all the shit we sell i'm not going to do an alex jones impersonation that is fucking hack that's for amateurs look at these bags under my eyes that's not what my fucking eyes look like dude this
	i think this was after you decided to change them up because this is the the one that you sent it to me.
	You sent this to me.
	This is from you.
	You sent it to me.
	Yeah, it doesn't matter how they appear in the email.
	You know how they go chronologically, don't you?
	What did you work on all day?
	What were you working on before we did the show?
	This one.
	Okay, that's before Boxing Day?
	In the email, yeah.
	Take down Johnny Apple.
	The email is irrelevant.
	Those are just the pictures.
	That's not the order they're in.
	So that's tomorrow?
	Yes.
	So this, go back.
	So tomorrow, Ryan and I are going to be opening presents.
	It is possibly the worst thing we've ever put on the site.
	We wanted to show the things close up, so we went up to the camera, put it on auto.
	Then our cameraman here, Ryan, neglected to put it back into focus.
	So the focus is fucked the whole time.
	We didn't have anyone checking the audio.
	So I guess my dog or something unplugged my audio.
	My audio sounds like shit.
	It's mostly coming through Ryan's mic.
	Only check that out if you're bored.
	It's pretty short, though.
	It's probably only like 40 minutes.
	Yeah.
	At the most.
	But it is very low quality.
	However, what's next?
	Boxing Day.
	Traditionally, Boxing Day is December 26th, and it's a British tradition.
	Canada too.
	It was originally for going out and taking presents, maybe presents you didn't need that you got for Christmas, boxing them up and giving them to the poor, the less fortunate.
	We've since changed that, and now it's buying stuff for ourselves, because that's what really, that's what Christmas is really about.
	Buying stuff for yourself.
	So on Boxing Day, I'll be teaching you how to box all my tricks.
	That's a pretty long one, though.
	How long is that?
	That's fucking high quality.
	Get your hopes up for December 26th.
	I'm considering making it free on this site.
	Oh, speaking of free, we have a new payment processor.
	Thank the Lord in heaven above.
	I got to be honest, I wasn't showing it too much on the show, but I was fretting because I went through maybe 11 banks that said, yeah, of course, yeah, we can do it.
	But can we see the site first?
	Oh, there's black people on it.
	You're not racist.
	Okay, that's fine.
	What's your name?
	Gavin McInnes.
	Oh, my God.
	Oh, okay.
	I'm Charles fucking Manson.
	My name is Mud.
	And I had 11 banks tell me to fuck off.
	I finally got one.
	So then we have the How to Box on December 26th.
	And then the beginning of next week, we have a new show called Car Guys.
	First episode is sort of an introduction to cars, what makes them tick.
	And then the second episode is like a rock and roll SoCal.
	You know, the guys with the crazy beards and the gloves with fingerless gloves and the horns and all that shit.
	We're going to, that's the second episode.
	Then things get serious on a Wednesday where we go to jail.
	We visit John.
	I know the bags look brutal there.
	That's the lighting and we've been up all night driving.
	And then on Thursday, so no live show next Wednesday.
	Then on Thursday, Milo and I watch Withdale and I. That's the part where Withdale is going, are you the farmer?
	Are you the farmer?
	And then I says, stop saying that, Whithdale.
	Of course he's a fucking farmer.
	It's one of my favorite spots.
	Hair, hair.
	Ha, ha?
	Oh, hair, hair.
	It's so funny.
	That movie's great.
	And I don't think with the commentary, it's a bad way to watch it for the first time.
	Really?
	And I think it was great.
	Yeah.
	Here's $1,500.
	What?
	Let's come on.
	I just got electrocuted by the headphones.
	I just got cared by carephones.
	So that's the good news is you get $1,500, your Christmas bonus.
	You've got your chest plate.
	Ow!
	Oh, that looks so bad.
	It's made of steel.
	It's more like a boombox, the bumbox.
	That's smart.
	So he's got his bulletproof vest on, which I think the people who make those could take it down a notch.
	That is thick.
	It must weigh 40 pounds.
	And it's thick enough to take like a jet plane to the chest.
	You're not going to get shot at point-blank range with a 30-odd 6.
	It should be knife-proof, 22s, not sniper rifles.
	Relax.
	Should be 40, 40, 45.
	My knuckle feels nothing but fire on it right now.
	With like a Rube Goldberg, in a way, you hit my ass.
	You punched me in the chest, and then my ass went into the side of the boombox and hurt.
	Every day, the power, I'm turning into the Hulk.
	I have to stop because I don't want someone's head to come flying off when I punch them.
	That's why I wear this to work now.
	Yeah, you should.
	It's not like I want to hurt you.
	But I don't say safety actually.
	I'm like the dude of mice and men who squished that little retarded boy or a bunny or something.
	Lenny, yeah.
	I'm Lenny now.
	So when people fuck with me, I go, please don't do that.
	Please run away now.
	Please go, go.
	And they go, why?
	What are you going to do, bitch?
	Oh, no.
	Don't call me, bitch, please.
	Please.
	They go, that kid is crying, little pussy.
	Oh, fuck.
	Here we go again.
	Oh, you got a webcam going.
	I got the webcam.
	Show the people.
	So isn't there, but they're like, did you mention the caveat?
	I was nursing my bum wound.
	Oh, I didn't mention the caveat.
	So I showed you all those things we have for the next couple weeks.
	And if Ryan is one minute late on any of them, or they show up and they're half like black, I don't mean like Obama.
	I mean halfway through it just goes to blackness or there's no sound on them or something.
	That doesn't count as putting it up.
	Putting it up means it's up and ready to rock.
	If they're not up at 9 a.m. every day, you lose $200 of your Christmas bonus.
	So let me do the math here.
	If I ruin everything, I still might come away with $100.
	$300, right?
	There's six things, six shows.
	Car Guys is two.
	Yep, yep.
	So six times two is 12.
	It leaves you 300 bucks.
	Doop, which is almost as much as the stimulus.
	We'll get to that.
	We've got some stuff on the stimulus.
	But yeah, I introduced, I was going to choose this as the intro song.
	One, two.
	Who are these guys?
	They're fun.
	I know what when I want one day, never mind.
	Partying.
	Today's book is The Night Before Christmas.
	It's got many names.
	It was originally a poem by an academic named Clement C. Moore, who was kind of embarrassed that his poem was kind of gay, creature-stirring, and all that.
	I think it helped define Santa Claus.
	There was Father Christmas, St. Nick.
	It wasn't that defined back then.
	And he said, you know, the long beard, the red nose.
	And then that kind of solidified it because this was such a successful book.
	And then I think 1832, he wrote it, 1837.
	He said, okay, it's me.
	I didn't know it was going to be such a hit.
	It's illustrated by a young man, Christian Birmingham.
	He's just like a classic British fine artist, you know, art school kind of guy, illustrator.
	It's really good illustrations, though.
	I don't know.
	It's the perfect kind of illustrations when you're reading a little boy a book or your daughter a book on Christmas Eve.
	So I'll have to remember to bring that back home.
	You know what else defines Santa?
	Let's see if this is ancient Chinese secrets.
	Coca-Cola.
	Coca-Cola had this artist they loved who did the first commercial for them in 1931.
	And he took a lot of it from this poem, Night Before Christmas, The Red Nose, The White Beard.
	He was always wearing red.
	That wasn't a new thing.
	It's not based on Coca-Cola.
	And he kept, he was with them for 30 years, drawing the same kind of Santa.
	So that's why we have the Santa we have now, which is why I tell the Jews to go friendly on Santa.
	Dennis Prager had a good thing on this.
	I told you I was going to push it this year, but it turns out I keep telling these Jews they need to support Santa because it's not Jesus.
	He's a cartoon flying from outer space handing presents.
	So do Hanukkah.
	Don't get me wrong.
	But why not have the tree and the little guy, the cartoon Superman?
	Have him bring presents.
	It only lasts, they usually grow out of it by eight.
	And I'm not asking you, the Easter bunny, by the way, would be equally...
	Actually, you know what?
	Do the Easter bunny.
	Why not?
	It's not Christ.
	The bunny.
	The bunny is, it's a pagan thing that we pulled in from the pagans so they wouldn't kill us.
	But I'm not that adamant about that.
	Let me think on the Easter Bunny thing first, because that's getting a little too close to Christ.
	And Christ is the reason for the season.
	But you can still celebrate, have a tree, and have Santa without saying, I believe in Jesus Christ.
	In fact, plenty of Christians don't like the Santa thing.
	The Dominicans here in New York, they think Santa's blasphemous.
	He's not the reason for the season.
	Get him out of here.
	They stay up till like two in the morning on Christmas Eve.
	Their whole party is tomorrow night, including the kids.
	So the kids are fucking falling asleep all over the rug.
	And then they wake them up at midnight.
	Hey, you fell asleep.
	Open your presents.
	They're like, these are great.
	Okay.
	And then they fall asleep on their toy truck.
	The parents keep partying.
	And then the parents sleep in till like two.
	They don't have the morning presents thing because that's Santa and Santa is anti-Christian according to them.
	In other words, it's pretty separate.
	What does Dennis say?
	Having Christmas trees in my society.
	It's a good thing.
	It's a happier place Christmas time, thanks to Christmas tree and decorations and Santa Clauses and Christmas music.
	It's all great.
	This inclusive, this totalitarian inclusiveness.
	You are a narcissist.
	Everything must revolve around you.
	It has nothing to do with inclusivity.
	It has to do with your hypersensitivity and immaturity.
	Am I strong enough on I love having Christmas trees in my society?
	Ron Coleman sent me this picture of him as a kid, and he's always been a raging Jew sitting on Santa's lap.
	In LA, the LA Jews do Santa.
	They do Hanukkah.
	They don't have nativity scenes.
	That's Ron Coleman.
	That guy has had 170 different heads.
	Is that him on the right?
	That's him in the gold thing that appears to be made by refugees.
	I don't know who makes his clothes.
	What?
	Do you get your clothes from a play?
	Looks like a party city Halloween store material.
	Like that nylon.
	Or it's super thick velour where you don't even need a winter jacket.
	I think a lot of ginos, Jews in name only, are anti-Christmas just to spite that Trump supporters.
	And before Trump, it was whatever.
	Those people.
	They just, and you see them with like zero Christmas decorations on their homes.
	Like not even a light.
	It's a fuck you.
	Orthodox Jews, Hasidic Jews, they get it.
	They'll say Merry Christmas a hundred times.
	They don't give a shit.
	They get that we're on the same page, basically.
	But I think Jews in name only are irreligious brats who use their fake Judaism to shit on everything fun.
	And it's not.
	It's lame.
	So if you see a Yarmuka, then say happy Hanukkah.
	But if you see a dick, then tell them where to stick it.
	Okay, sometimes our colloquialisms will not be great.
	Oh, we're mid-roll.
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	Here's the coffee beans, unchopped up.
	What do you call that?
	When you slice them and dice them?
	Ungrounded beans.
	Whole beans, yeah.
	Whole beans, grounded beans.
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	That's beardvet.com, promo code Gavin, 20% off all orders.
	You may have noticed that we were extra energized this week.
	That's because we've been on beard vet.
	It is the gift that keeps giving.
	I even saw some of the viewers said, this seemed like a particularly coked up episode.
	I'm too old to do Coke.
	I do Beard Vet.
	It's an old waltz Coke.
	That should be there.
	Hey, cops, worried about blood tests?
	Do beard Vet.
	It's all the upsides of cocaine without losing your pension.
	That's after one cup.
	Speaking of Santa, this like racism culture we're in is so humorless that now they're taking Rudolph and turning it into a remember?
	Do you remember they're rebooting Fresh Prince of Bel Air?
	And it's a super heavy story about a guy down his luck?
	This is a super heavy story about a basketball player from a broken home who has a red nose.
	His name's Rudolph.
	This isn't a joke.
	It is.
	No, it's not.
	What?
	Everyone thought the fresh prince of Bel Air, which is called Bel Air, you should look that up too.
	We'll replay that.
	Everyone thought that was a joke.
	It's real.
	This is real.
	Does every male wish he had a deeper voice?
	I don't know, Trebby.
	I think Howard Stern fucks with it on his mic because you hear his old things.
	He's like, hey, come in the studio.
	Can we see your tits?
	And now he's like, hey, Robin.
	He goes, that other school is an hour walk from here.
	Yeah?
	An hour walk?
	That's like three miles.
	Yeah.
	On a bike, that would take you 10 minutes.
	Three miles?
	How is an hour walk from here?
	Not far on a sleigh.
	Who wrote this?
	I would have to walk over three miles to get to school.
	A paraplegic with a broken wheel?
	And the bus doesn't come to this part of town.
	Hmm, if only they'd invented the bicycle.
	The neighborhood?
	I'm working two jobs just to get my car out the shop.
	You have a zero time inspiration for fighting.
	What?
	They were fighting Rudolph because he wouldn't play in their basketball games.
	That's the only thing that isn't the same as reindeer is black.
	Just get a job.
	I can help you with rent.
	Watch Zuri.
	School ain't for me, Pops.
	You're not dropping out of school, Rudy.
	Look, I know it's hard, son.
	Why'd you name your son Rudolph?
	Are you really into German culture or something?
	Or is it Norwegian?
	Remember what she said.
	Always lead with your heart, not your fists.
	And your nose.
	Hello?
	I want you to go work for Santa Claus.
	And then, of course, the kids start picking on him.
	What's up, man?
	You need to go see a mechanic or something.
	Engine lights on.
	It's kind of a good joke.
	If you're going to be teasing kids with red noses, that's in the top 4% quality briffs your engine light is on.
	Anyway, you get the picture.
	It goes on and on like that.
	Speaking of Norwegian, by the way, well, that's in racism.
	We'll get to the Norwegian thing in a second.
	We got to still cover the stuff that's sitting at my feet here.
	I finally got my cop sweatshirt.
	This is 1.6.
	This took three weeks to make.
	So it's not the most topical thing anymore.
	It's not a CBD topical.
	But look, we've got Val K969.
	So the story is, back in, I don't know when, I think the late 80s, Detective George Cachevalle, sorry if I mispronounced his name, was shot in line of duty.
	So they named a canine unit after him.
	I don't think he was in the canine unit.
	He just liked it.
	And then they made these sweatshirts for the canine unit.
	And some teacher just happened to have it on.
	It's a thick sweatshirt.
	It's really, really warm.
	You can get them at...
	What's it called?
	I should have included the link to order them.
	That was stupid of me.
	But you can get them.
	They're in the Bronx.
	And they are at a place called Shiznet.
	Maybe it'll be in my name.
	Something searchable?
	Because I can look for it as you tell the tale.
	NRPD.
	Oh, fart biscuits.
	I'm drawing a fucking blanket.
	I know.
	I'll look up her name.
	It's like Bridgeport or something?
	I'll look up the dead detective's name because I talked to his daughter.
	I tried to get her on the show, and she kind of, I guess she googled me and said new.
	Diamondback.
	Yeah.
	Diamondback Sportswear.
	DiamondbackSportswear.com.
	And they make these shirts.
	Anyway, teacher wore the shirt and they said to the class, sorry, the principal of the school said the Blue Lives Matter Flag makes some children feel unsafe.
	And that says a lot of shit, but two things it says to me: is one, hey, children, the cops are bad, they're dangerous, they're evil.
	And say someone's trying to rape you, don't go to the cops.
	You just put my kids in jeopardy by telling them that because now I'm scared that they're going to be scared of going to the cops.
	So fuck you.
	Secondly, you're saying blue lives don't matter.
	It's offensive to say blue lives matter.
	And the irony is, Black Lives Matter is a Marxist organization that burns cities down.
	It's a scam, and they've made it very clear that what they're really about is dismantling the family.
	Blue Lives Matter is word for word, face value, what you get.
	There's no secret dismantling of anything.
	All right, so we got that.
	It's fun to wear, but I have trouble with sweatshirts is they're so fucking hot.
	Do you got scissors?
	I do.
	Let's open this box.
	Oh, I got my knife because I don't know where that is.
	Yeah, that's better.
	Why would I prefer scissors to a knife when you're opening a box?
	Here's a fun box we just got today.
	Christmas presents.
	Christmas presents.
	Hope they don't suck.
	We'll be in a new studio soon.
	What?
	Got it.
	We'll be in a new studio soon, and we'll be able to store this shit.
	But as of now, in our little mouse hole, which you only have a couple weeks to rub.
	I don't know where to store most of this shit.
	Got a big Proud Boys shirt that says Gavin.
	Okay, that's fun.
	I'll have to hide that from the FBI.
	Stealing our hats.
	Don't let me do shots or Coke.
	I should have copyrighted that.
	I made that shirt in the 90s, and I wasn't kidding.
	I've got a Proud Boys bowling shirt.
	That's fun.
	Some patches.
	This is way too much shit, dude.
	American Hero, General Flynn.
	That's fun.
	This is like an unboxing.
	This is from Bobby Pickles.
	The Poe Boys.
	Okay.
	We've got Biden here.
	Proud Boys Recruiter of the Year.
	I think he would have to...
	He's competing with Mark Dwyer, whose shitty sentence with Max.
	Gave, got a mask and a hat.
	Boy, this is a lot of shit, dude.
	What's this?
	Okay, Loomer?
	Get it?
	Like, okay, Boomer?
	We got...
	No Sharia in the USA.
	Laura Loomer.
	And then it says, incest Omar.
	She married her brother.
	No puns there.
	Jesus, this must be his entire stock.
	Roger Stone did nothing wrong.
	My arms hurt from showing you this merch.
	More Proud Boys stuff.
	Proud Boys Iran.
	Oh, I get it.
	That's funny.
	Remember, because I ran Iranian hackers use the Proud Boy site.
	Pardon Roger Stone.
	That's, I guess, an old shirt.
	Stand black.
	Stand by.
	What's this now?
	Is there a site?
	Oh, okay, there we go.
	On parlor, right?
	There's probably a link.
	Guinness is Gaelic for genius.
	Kyle Rittenhouse did nothing wrong with a really cool background.
	Look at that.
	The Tree of Liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of commies.
	Okay.
	And then we got fucking.
	Fuck Antifa.
	He's got a good graphic designer.
	It's kind of got a punky look to it.
	Dirty Judge, my Berman Jackson.
	I don't really get that.
	Amy Berman Jackson, Dirty Judge.
	Oh, she's the one who put Roger Stone in peril.
	Oh, yeah.
	Kill the Elders.
	Oh.
	I like the Elders.
	I guess there's a civil war going on.
	Oh, this is a good one.
	Proud Boys Did Nothing Wrong.
	I'm a Western chauvinist, and I refuse to apologize for creating the modern world, defending free speech in 1776.
	Speaking of Proud Boys, god damn it.
	I got this letter from Max I want to read you.
	I said, my favorite thing to ask prisoners, and I don't think they enjoy it because they don't want to hear about, they don't want to talk about prison and their charges all the time.
	They're done with that.
	So I said to him, what percentage of the guys you meet in there are incompatible with society?
	Like say a dog, right?
	Say there's a dog that's been biting people and stuff.
	Most of them can be retrained with just a little bit of love and just bad conditions, bad owners.
	I know I'm talking about inmates like their dogs.
	But I said to him, which ones are irrevocable, incompatible with society?
	And he said, he sent me back this email.
	And by the way, I asked Jim Goad that once and he said 5%.
	5% is a common number because you take away domestics where they were just fighting, but she called the cops because she was mad.
	Drugs, either you're fighting for territory or you were on drugs or you were robbing someone because of drugs.
	False accusations, a fight that got out of hand.
	You know, like people who randomly stabbed a stranger for no reason.
	Do they belong in there?
	And even when I went to that penitentiary in Philadelphia, they were talking about murderers and saying most murderers just do it once and they never do it again.
	So they would have sentences of like five years.
	And those guys would sit alone with the Bible.
	They'd learn a trade.
	They would have a little area in the back.
	It was very civilized.
	And the crazy part about that whole experiment is they wanted to retain the person's honor and self-respect.
	So they didn't follow them after.
	So we don't know if that worked.
	But the cage thing is clearly not working because we do have data on that.
	And recidivism is through the roof in this country.
	Anyway, why don't you play the mailbag thing, and this will be our mailbag before the paywall.
	Cool.
	Ryan shut up, you don't have a dead.
	Let's turn our eyes together.
	Let me touch it.
	Okay, you ready for this?
	I read it to my sons tonight at dinner, and my youngest boy was like, how long is this?
	By the way, he says it's about 1%, but he talked to some other inmates.
	They said about 5% are just, they should be in a cage.
	They're bad men.
	Get them, don't put them in society.
	They cannot be retrained.
	It wasn't a matter of a bad owner.
	It's a rabid dog that's going to bite you if you go near it.
	The ratio of socially compatible slash incompatible people in prison is similar to everyday life in the street.
	Learning that was quite a shock.
	The antagonist in everyday life is the bully.
	Chip on the shoulder, bad attitude, disrespectful, assertive types that deserve to have their dads put a cigarette out on their chest.
	You don't find those guys in prison.
	Those guys do pretty good in life.
	They usually find themselves in places of authority because they can force people to get jobs done.
	Like I guess they become foremen or managers or something like that.
	They get their kicks from belittling people.
	I don't see these people committing crimes past being physically abusive.
	So for the most part, they aren't robbing banks, cashing checks, selling drugs, and getting caught.
	They already have their edge.
	It's the little guy who needs an edge.
	The ratzo rizzo, this is me talking, ratzo rizzo in midnight cowboy, the little thief, the petty little thief, the Joe Pesci guy.
	That regular Joe finds a way to make a little extra on the side, takes the risk, and gets caught like a retard.
	He goes to jail and finds it's mostly full of idiots like him.
	And then he adds, so it's like weasly guys.
	And then you go, okay, so it must be a bunch of little weasly dudes with one or two giants that just run the prison.
	The biggest guy in the prison, right?
	That's the way it is in the movies.
	No, being big doesn't mean shit in here.
	Their faces bleed just as much as anyone when it's all carved up with a can lid.
	Everyone is dangerous.
	Everyone has to sleep carefully.
	Everyone's eyes are in the front of their skull.
	My point is, the big guy isn't the bully by default.
	The big guys in here typically eat in their cells because they're self-conscious and don't like people watching them eat.
	Weird.
	I would conjecture that they are also sick of fighting all the time.
	Like in Glasgow, you go up to anyone that's over six feet and you go, I bet you get in a lot of fights with little guys, right?
	And they'll go, see, see you guys now.
	I know I have problem with the wee men.
	I don't have problem with little men.
	It's true.
	Every tall guy in Glasgow has to fight once a day.
	Some little dude who wants to prove himself.
	Murderers, for the most part, just happened to do it.
	They weren't any more emotional than anyone else gets when their wife leaves them for another man.
	They just put themselves in a situation where they can actually go through with it.
	They are happy and talkative, like a very normal person.
	Here we go to what he calls the 1%, what other people seem to call the 5%.
	The people who are incompatible with society are either hell-bent on being gangster or are mentally broken records.
	People who are mental talk a big game and get their asses beat on the regular.
	They are pleasant 99% of the time, but then that record spins all the way around and the needle hits the scratch and all of a sudden they want to kill your entire family.
	They actually do belong in here.
	Even when they didn't do the crime, they belong in here.
	But there are so few of them, it seems like a fluke, a glitch in the matrix.
	One of my good buddies in here was like that.
	He went to the box recently.
	A story for another time.
	Classic, crazy, Italian straight out of the movies.
	A true killer.
	No remorse.
	Just killing.
	Not a single person took him seriously.
	99% of these gangstas, that's the other group he was referring to before he got into the broken record guys, say they're going straight when they get out.
	They don't want to get caught up in the mess again.
	The problem is they parole right back to the same projects with the same people, same drama, and get into the same trouble.
	I do know a few of them that are set on getting busy in the streets after they get out, but even they crack once in a while and shout out to no one in particular, I just want to go home and be with my family.
	There are a lot of people in here that, well, we call them rapos.
	Mostly they stand out, but on more than one occasion I've got to talking to guys in my electrical class on the walk back to the dorms.
	Somebody will come up to me and say, you should stay clear of that guy.
	And I'll be completely caught off guard.
	Really?
	No way, that guy?
	And they go, yeah, that motherfucker wore a dolphin mask and shook his dick at a bunch of nuns on vacation at SeaWorld.
	And then I go, no fucking way.
	I believe that was a made-up example.
	It's like that sometimes, but mostly they stick to themselves, never talk to anyone but each other.
	So you can tell the type just by looking at the way they move.
	I never trusted creepy people and I never will.
	When they looked apart, you know that's what they're in here for.
	This prison has a lot of them, but that's because the system keeps them concentrated in a few spots.
	So, to sum it up, prison isn't what people think it is.
	Living in prison is not a constant reminder that you are being punished.
	Prison is society away from society.
	When you fuck up in the big world, you get sent to the small world.
	People can function in society when they respect others, use formalities, and clean up after themselves.
	Most prisoners fit that criteria.
	And then he adds, the people who belong in prison are the ones who drive slow in the fucking left lane.
	What are you doing, asshole, grandma motherfucker, Toyota Corolla, cocksucker?
	I think he was trying to end on a moment of levity.
	All right, so that's in front of the paywall.
	We still have a lot of news to get to, but I think we've given the freeloaders enough.
	We were unable to take you on, freeloaders, and indulge you in our services, but we now can.
	So come aboard and get your fucking friends for Christmas a membership.
	Get a monthly one.
	Get a year one.
	You should get a year.
	It's $100.
	And sign up.
	And they'll be, hopefully they won't watch tomorrow's December 24th Christmas present thing as the first thing.
	That would be unfortunate.
	But I think they're going to be very happy with the next week of content.
	All Right, so that brings us to the way we end every show, which is: get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.
	Can I take this off yet?
	I'm anti-sweater starting today.
	I don't have to wear these for another year.
	And when we'll be in the new studio next year, we can turn it into a fucking fridge.
	What are you running around for?
	You have to go get water?
	Oh, that's more important.
	Our tricaster overheats on these long shows.
	So I was talking about Santa earlier and how he's kind of Norwegian.
	Jim Gold wrote a great article in Tacky Mag about the oranges and Christmas because a few years ago, Megan Kelly got in big shit for saying Santa's not black.
	And it's just a fact.
	I mean, the Easter bunny's not a dog.
	We're not saying dogs are bad, but Santa's not black.
	You know, if we would just aerosol that thing out, all the dust would come out and we'd stop having this overheating problem.
	I'll order some of that right now.
	What is it called?
	Dust away?
	Dust away?
	I don't think so.
	Compressed air.
	Shit, we could cut out.
	That thing's humming away.
	You know what's funny?
	I got that used for $15,000.
	Brand new now, there may two.
	The volume has increased.
	That's true.
	So, I just sent you a funny email.
	Don't go on Amazon and buy shit when we're fucking here doing a show.
	Sorry.
	Of all the times to finally get around to buying that.
	It'll write on my notes.
	Compressed.
	Oh, you know what was weird?
	We had to...
	I didn't get that email yet.
	When we were shopping around for sites, I mean, for banks, some insider goes, yeah, this sounds political, but also, dude, don't have an auctions link on your site.
	Why?
	Banks hate auctions.
	They're notoriously corrupt.
	But we don't see the money.
	The money's over at the auction side.
	It goes straight to Zenoa.
	It never touches our hands.
	I didn't want to touch it because I don't want to get taxed on it.
	So we had to take that down.
	So we'll be getting that back up soon.
	The auctions will be back up.
	And my notes are for sale, $25 each.
	It was your idea.
	I didn't suggest selling my signed notes.
	Oh, and we're going to have the posters, the timeline posters.
	Can you go grab that?
	Those are going to be $100 signed, and I think $20 unsigned.
	But that'll be, it's right there against the wall.
	Isn't that nice?
	Very high-quality paper, too.
	So I've signed it and numbered.
	We only made 200 of these.
	Rare edition.
	I spelt declaration wrong, as Milo likes to point out, but otherwise everything is correct.
	I fixed about 10 mistakes before I printed these.
	So that'll be fun.
	A very Merry Christmas!
	My email didn't arrive yet?
	No.
	That's not good.
	You just sent it, right?
	Yeah, but it's so weird that things have to go to outer space before they can go five feet over to the left.
	What the hell?
	So I was talking about how Santa's just got it.
	This was something my wife just sent me that I think I should share with you.
	Dad's getting ready for all the shit they need to build and put together.
	The thing that annoys me about Christmas, like my son wanted this thing last year that was this Hot Wheels fucking castle.
	It was so huge and it took batteries and the cars would go down this big thing and then go and they go back up the elevator and they go to various, it was like a parking garage, but for us a massive mall that had cool tracks and everything.
	It took me two hours to get together and I think my youngest boy played with it for two hours total.
	So it was a project for me.
	So many of these are a project for me.
	Yeah, I think that's no, but it's basically that.
	It's very similar.
	I think it had King Kong on it.
	Yeah, it had a gorilla on it who would try to stop you from going all the way up.
	But these trends with Hot Wheels, and he's over Hot Wheels now.
	He doesn't care about Hot Wheels.
	I'm very scared that toys are done.
	Oh shit, I didn't do a wrap-up.
	I think we have a post thing where we talk about the collars.
	Yeah, I think toys are done.
	I've watched my kids' Christmas lists go brrrrrrr, and it's not because they're getting older.
	My seven-year-old's Christmas list, when my 12-year-old boy was seven, his Christmas list was this.
	It was hard to cram it all into one page.
	There was so much ninja turtle stuff.
	And then my youngest boys now, my seven-year-old, it's like Roblox, blah, blah, blah.
	Almost no, I think one or two physical things.
	We had to push one thing on him.
	We're like, you should probably ask Santa for one of those electrical motorbikes that you sort of sit on and that can toot around the driveway.
	He's like, why?
	I don't know.
	Santa might really want to get you one.
	So you have some toys on your thing and it's not all video game shit.
	But I hereby predict that toys are about to become extinct.
	That is my prediction.
	But speaking of Santa being Norwegian, I thought this was awesome.
	1-7.
	This guy has a Norwegian first name.
	He's probably in Norway and their O has a line through it.
	Oh, we should do the racism thing.
	Shit.
	Wait, post-roll.
	Post-roll means it's after the we drew the paywall.
	Because Bubba and Hanks, I haven't said that one yet.
	Is that supposed to go to the free podcast?
	I could text them.
	Well, yeah, of course it does.
	They want to be...
	Okay, let's make the show end now.
	Okay.
	Before we go, we want you to go to BubbaandHanks.com.
	Promo code Gavin, 20% off all orders.
	The official proud wagy, Bubbaandhanks.com.
	Promo code Gavin.
	We have two Christmas giveaways, caller number one.
	We still get a lot to talk about.
	Caller number one, Bubba and Hanks Prize Pack, a Beard Vet Prize Pack, and a Johnny Apple Prize Pack.
	Caller number two gets exactly the same thing.
	The Bubba and Hanks prize pack, the Beard Vet Prize Pack, and the Johnny Apple Prize Pack.
	First two lucky callers.
	First two lucky callers.
	And Ryan will not forget.
	No.
	Okay, so now again, we say, get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.
	Right?
	Then I throw my thing.
	Okay, so go to 17.
	This guy has a Norwegian name.
	Click on the picture.
	Using zero, so the way you get that Norwegian character on a keyboard is I think you use a zero.
	But anyway, using that O is a white supremacist giveaway.
	Giveaway is one word, asshole.
	We get it, sir.
	It's we get it, sir, comma.
	You don't need a comma after we get it.
	We get it, sir.
	You think you're descended from uber white Vikings, as opposed to what?
	What other Vikings are there?
	The Filipino Vikings?
	You can just say Vikings.
	So this is one of my pet peeves when people are telling other people about syntax and then making a million mistakes.
	So he goes, that O is a letter in the Norwegian alphabet, and it's the first letter in my name.
	And then someone else goes, skip over the racism to defend Norwegian spelling.
	Sounds about white.
	What?
	What the fuck?
	It's his name!
	And similarly, Lauren Chen was on.
	I don't know.
	This might be low-hanging fruit.
	You might be like talking to an eight-year-old, but check out what she learned, that she's not mixed race today.
	Ready?
	You're going to have to blow this up.
	It's pretty amazing.
	She goes, are you mixed?
	Yes.
	So you're black?
	No, I'm Asian and white.
	So you're not mixed?
	Because you're white.
	What?
	No, I'm still two races.
	Yeah, but you're white.
	That's not what mixed means.
	If you're not black, how are you mixed?
	Take that shit out of your bio.
	And then I guess that means you're not mixed, right?
	Right.
	Mixed race.
	Mixed race means mixed race.
	I'm mixed between Asian and white.
	What is a race, you know?
	No, white is a race, you know?
	Mixed is black and Asian.
	Mixed just means mixed race.
	You can't be mixed and white.
	You know, I think that comes from like the KKK in the 30s with the one drop rule.
	Right.
	And everyone's still running with that, even though, like, everyone on the left is still running with that, even though none of the other people think that.
	Yo, you got a touch of the tarbrush.
	Yo, your hair's kind of frizzy.
	Get the fuck out of here.
	That's the funniest thing about all of these allegations is that it's a thing.
	There's a really qualified woman who wants to work here.
	Woman, sorry.
	By the way, everyone hates our feminism, this cancer thing.
	Well, do you want to play the alternate?
	Because we had another one.
	Yeah, let's do the other one.
	It's very unpopular, that dancing one.
	I think they're right.
	Yeah, she's going to make your company better.
	You should hire her.
	You'll all get rich.
	No, she's a woman.
	It's 1950, and I'm grabbing my secretary's ass, and she can't do anything about it because we live in a stupid Dolly Parton movie from the 80s.
	It's just the stupidest allegations.
	Feminism.
	Oh, that's a fun one.
	I don't think I've ever seen that one.
	Have you, Trump?
	Believe me, and I am always right.
	Here's some female cops being useless.
	Well, they're useless everywhere, but here they are being useless in Belgium.
	I'll translate for you.
	Belgium speaks French and Dutch.
	Hello.
	So they're.
	Just pause and go full screen.
	So they must, they're probably West Africans, so they speak French or Haitians.
	So they know they have to speak French in this particular illegal party.
	Maybe this is a, maybe the crime was just having a gathering during COVID.
	What is this here?
	Who are you speaking?
	Everyone stay here.
	Let's just pause.
	So she doesn't have a gun.
	Everyone stay here.
	It's like 50 Africans.
	And what does she do?
	Makes a human barrier, a human wall.
	Good luck, guys.
	Good luck getting through that.
	What do you think is going on in there?
	I'm going to pretend that's my biggest issue.
	So let me make him go back to three seasons, but that's where she draws the bomb.
	It's her line in the stand.
	You don't care if we just go around you.
	And once one gets out, he's like, just that's not a law.
	Like, you don't have police when you can just walk past them.
	You're not enforcing anything.
	So then she's had enough.
	And plus, she knows she's being filmed.
	So she's feeling herself go viral.
	Look at this.
	And then she goes, I got it.
	I'll hold the door.
	Because I'm strong.
	No, you're not.
	Get the fuck out of my way.
	You're useless.
	By the way, she called for backup at one point to the other girl.
	Ooh, bitch.
	Get out the way.
	Okay, there we go.
	I got it now.
	Now that everyone's out.
	They're everywhere.
	Yeah, go get a bunch of black people.
	You're not running around.
	Racial profiling, you're going to have to use that.
	Oh, there's two dummies are left.
	They should be arrested for being slow at escaping.
	Also in feminism news, this is 2-0.
	The Boy Scouts have a new angle.
	They're all girls.
	Imagine if they had a club for girls.
	We could name it, wait for it, Girl Scouts.
	They could sell cookies.
	Why are they 38 years old?
	Aren't you supposed to be a kid?
	I guess those are the leaders.
	This is sort of like what the left does.
	Like Republicans will make a little county and the schools will be good and crime will be low.
	And they'll go, ooh, that looks good.
	I want to move there.
	Then they move there, vote for socialists, ruin the place.
	It sucks.
	The taxes are way too high.
	The property value starts plummeting.
	And then they go, oh, we got to get out of here.
	And they move to a new place and just keep ruining things like locusts.
	That's what women do.
	And it's especially the type of woman who wants to join the Boy Scouts is going to be, how would you say this, a cunt?
	Yeah, she's going to be a cunt.
	And so you don't want to be around her if you're in the Boy Scouts.
	So that's yet another thing they wrecked.
	And they, I mean, the far left.
	And then my final piece of fun info for feminism is a great way to become a woman is to rape your daughter.
	Federal judge, this is not the B, not the Babylon B. Federal judge says your taxpayer dollars will be used for a sex change on a man who repeatedly raped his own daughter.
	It's possible he did it to get the sex change.
	He thought, I'll go to jail, then they'll have to pay for it.
	Sex changes are like $100,000, and then they'll have to cut my dick off and do that.
	Unbelievably complicated operation.
	No wonder it's $100,000.
	That's not a joke, what I just showed you.
	That's an actual thing.
	That's the clown world we're living in, where Norwegians can't use the letters in their name, and men rape their children so they can get their dicks cut off.
	All right, let's jump to Trump.
	Do not allow anyone to tell you that it cannot be done.
	I'm gay for Trump.
	And I love you.
	And yes, together, we will make America great again.
	Here was a great quote on the stimulus package.
	Apparently, Trump's saying, what?
	He's spending all these trillions and you have 600 bucks per American?
	And so he says, that's stupid.
	We should veto it and force it to be at least two grand and cut the Pakistani gender studies.
	You know, what every reasonable person in the country has said.
	So Amy Klobuchar, who ran for president, if you recall, this woman is not some crazy outsider no one's ever heard of.
	Let's check her out with Rachel Maddow.
	On the Judiciary Committee.
	Senator, thanks for joining us on such a bizarre night.
	I appreciate you making time.
	Of course, Rachel.
	I thought it was a good idea.
	It was bizarre to object to a 5,000-page bill that we were given three hours to read.
	With my tree.
	And here we are.
	And I just hearing these stories, it is literally you to the FBI, screw you to all these lying prosecutors.
	These are the hardest cases to make against sitting congressmen.
	They did this.
	They put them away for good reason.
	And all of these cases, they're so disparate, right?
	They don't really have an organizing principle.
	But what they have in common is what Mike Schmidt pointed out earlier in your show.
	And that is that 88% of these pardons are somehow related to Donald Trump or his political goals.
	And it is corruption through and through.
	Okay.
	It was corruption that got the...
	Was Roger Stone rightfully convicted?
	What did he do, Amy?
	Tell us what he did specifically.
	Look at her laughing at how dumb we all are.
	And we have seen that also happen in his previous pardon for Mike Flynn and his convocation of the sentence for Roger Stone.
	Hack up to go of this.
	That he's going to veto it.
	There is some nuance to it with him saying that he wants a larger size payment to the American people, which is something that Democrats argue for at every step of the process.
	And now House Democrats say, okay, well, if that's what he wants, we'll provide him with that.
	I wonder just what you make of this very last-minute scramble of what we thought we wanted to proceed here.
	Who was giving him a choice?
	They got it at 2 p.m. and had to vote at 5 p.m.
	And it's 5,000 pages.
	That's literally impossible.
	That Chiron really makes it seem like he's against people getting COVID relief, too.
	Trump threatens to veto COVID relief bill.
	Yeah.
	I kept thinking tonight, well, these pardons are an attack on our very democracy, this is an attack on every American.
	People who are struggling to get by right now, out of work, whose unemployment, the unemployment is going to basically end the day after Christmas if this doesn't pass.
	People who are out of work.
	People who are.
	Why did you write such a shitty bill?
	Why didn't you just give, see how much money you can allot and then divide it amongst 331 million Americans?
	Seems pretty simple to me.
	To help the people.
	It's an attack on the American people to give them $600 instead of $1,200.
	$2,000.
	Trump wanted to attack.
	It's $2,000.
	And then we find out the Kennedy Center, which has assets to the tune of half a billion dollars.
	Kennedy Center was given tens of millions in Malala.
	Tax money showed the Kennedy Center has $661 million in assets, over half a billion.
	And then it shows the executives.
	Go to the next one.
	Oh, that's the half a billion thing.
	Let's see what they're making.
	That looks like triple digits.
	Yeah, half a million.
	Zoom in more.
	$475, $475K, $365K.
	Keep in mind, the average salary in America is $50,000.
	But the executives at the Kennedy Center, which is a very important institution where I guess they have classical music shit, deserved half a million dollars a year.
	This is really just politicians wanting to be invited to fun parties.
	This is a bank robbery.
	We were robbed.
	Not in the middle of the night, in the middle of the day.
	Finally, this is a stupid story, but I cannot resist.
	Candace Owens had this guy from the Churchill Club.
	His name is Nick Engstrom.
	And she was talking to him about the lunacy of the way conservatives are treated at Trinity College.
	He wants to start a club called the Churchill Club, and that's white supremacist.
	Churchill defeated the Nazis, but he's a Nazi because he's white?
	What?
	What?
	You want to start the Winston, are you calling it a club, an institute?
	Yeah, so the Churchill Club.
	The Churchill Club.
	And you're already getting protested for saying that you want to start the club, and the people that are protesting are showing up at the SGA.
	Yeah, so we're currently, it's just like an open door meeting.
	We're trying to get approval.
	50 people show up and they're protesting it.
	I stood there and I answered about an hour and a half worth of questions.
	Did you recognize him?
	Just about sort of.
	Oh.
	I think he's the guy that we made fun of.
	And by the way, Nick, I'm on your side.
	I think you should have the Churchill Club.
	We had Candace on the show.
	I've had her on my show many times.
	We like you, but I can't resist making fun of you.
	You're the guy who had the sign that said something like, not all men are rapists.
	The feminists stole it.
	And he went, call the cops, and then put his hands in his pockets.
	Weird.
	Now I can't find it because I don't know what to search.
	You're not going to find it during the show.
	I looked for half an hour.
	It's not on his social media.
	That's his face.
	That's his little chubby cheeks.
	His little hamster face.
	Anyway, I feel bad making fun of him.
	Maybe you guys can find it and send it in.
	We'll show it on July 4th.
	I mean, January 4th when we're back, or I'll put it on parlor.
	But now I feel bad making fun of him because we thought that was so gay that he said call the cops.
	Maybe he is gay.
	But go to 2.5.
	This is a statement of my personal values, though I am confident that the overwhelming majority of the Trinity community would agree with this statement.
	I denounce white supremacy and all that it represents in society today.
	This is a professor's reaction to the suggestion that young Republicans have a club called the Churchill Club.
	I denounce racism and discrimination against historically and traditionally marginalized groups, and I offer those members of our community my strongest support, recognition, and affirmation, says the professor, Berger Sweeney.
	The West didn't start slavery.
	The East did.
	The West ended it.
	Churchill didn't start Nazis.
	He ended them.
	You're welcome.
	I refuse to apologize for this.
	All right, let's have some fun with our favorite retarded president-elect, Joey B. All right,
	that's enough.
	That's just too long.
	You know, we're going to have an if, if Trump doesn't pull this off and we're stuck with Biden, we're going to have a very fun next few years because there's a lot of gold coming out of this absolute fucking clown.
	Someone asked him about Biden, Hunter Biden, of course.
	Tough question.
	He answers by calling the guy, laughing at the guy, which is something Kamala Harris does all the time.
	It's this smug sort of.
	It's a strange defense mechanism you might see in prison or something.
	It's not natural.
	It's at best patronizing.
	At worst, incredibly phony.
	And he follows up his laughing by calling the guy a one-horse pony.
	Merry Christmas, everybody.
	Thank you.
	Do you still think that the stories from the fall about these sons were right?
	Yes, yes, yes.
	God love you, man.
	You're a one-horse pony.
	I tell you, thank you.
	Thank you.
	I promise you, my Justice Department will be totally on its own making its judgments about how they should proceed.
	Thank you.
	Joe, it's a one-trick pony.
	A one-horse open sleigh?
	Was he just singing?
	Yeah, maybe you were thinking of Christmas?
	You're a one-horse open sleigh, Bub.
	And then 2-7, my only other Biden piece of news is they were telling Facebook who to ban while they continued to bury this story.
	Hunter Biden emails reveal founder of Facebook's DC Office banned accounts at Biden's request as family made millions from Silicon Valley Dems.
	Of course, you won't see this story outside of Loomer.
	That's why it's so important to subscribe to censored.tv because no one else talks about these stories.
	You know, there's one more Biden thing.
	Did you see that little Zoom thing, the Zoom call?
	Where you said...
	Yeah, I haven't had that verified yet.
	Yeah, I don't know.
	Oh, right, right.
	It could be like a voice modulator.
	Not just because of African Americans.
	This country is doomed.
	It is doomed, not just because of African Americans, but because by 2040, this country is going to be minority white European.
	Hear me?
	Minority white European.
	And you guys are going to have to start working more with Hispanics, who make up a larger portion of the population than y'all do.
	This country is...
	He's right.
	Yay, Joe.
	You know, I saw a guy, I think his name was Sam Francis, considered an evil right-winger, and it was at a conference for the Council of Conservative Citizens.
	And I was just checking it out because I was curious.
	I wasn't really a conservative then.
	It was 2000, pre-9-11.
	And he said, watch, mark my words.
	America is going to be third white, third brown, third black soon.
	And once it does that, people will only vote along racial lines.
	So blacks will vote for the black guy, Hispanics will vote for the Hispanic guy, and whites will vote for the white guy.
	And there'll be no policies discussed.
	It'll be completely racial.
	And that's where we're getting to right now.
	People don't talk about policy anymore.
	They say, I'm Hispanic.
	My last name is Rivera.
	I do be saying that.
	And now it's like all of Biden's cabinet is the first Latin ex person to work in finance and the first American Indian to be in the Federal Reserve.
	And what are their qualifications?
	It's Justin Trudeau all over again.
	So we're going to have a great time reporting on this buffoonery for the next, well, until he dies in about a year of a brain aneurysm.
	All right, let's jump to Antifa BLM.
	Fuck your dad.
	That's, I think, our best one.
	Pretty good.
	So we've discovered more pedophiles in Antifa once again.
	Oh, Gavin, are you talking about Mika Rhodes, the guy who would rape underage couples, male and female?
	No, a different pedophile.
	This disgusting human being, a Seattle-area Antifa member who's been arrested multiple times during violent protests, has been identified as a children's camp counselor and substitute teacher.
	Never click on Fox News videos.
	They're never related.
	See?
	A Seattle area Antifa member who has been arrested multiple times has been identified as a children's camp counselor and substitute teacher.
	Could we be worse at vetting, please?
	On December 16th, Mikolai Andrew Baker, 23.
	How are you a teacher at 23?
	Don't you just get out of school at like 22?
	Tweeted a list with the names of businesses and a resident that signed a petition in support of sweeping Cal Anderson Park, reported the postmillennial, an online publication that frequently reports on Antifa and other left-wing groups.
	The park was a previous site of the Capitol Hill organized protest, or CHOP.
	And look at this guy, Antifa militant Andrew Baker.
	Imagine this person was teaching your kids.
	Go up, click on that picture.
	Imagine you found out that was teaching your kids.
	That guy was teaching your kids.
	Who's that guy?
	Who's that guy?
	He's obviously a sexual degenerate.
	That's not just gay.
	God, I pine for the old gay days.
	Remember when gays were just gays?
	This guy is a violent domestic terrorist who is likely a pedophile, anarchaflutist.
	Jesus H. Christ.
	Sounds like you're writing a new all-in-the-family theme song.
	Back when gays were gays.
	When gays were gays and gays were gays.
	Honey, we could use some gays.
	I only have one Proud Boy story because I read Max's letter already and we've already done the mailbag.
	But I guess we show...
	This intro is going to be longer than the story.
	Oops.
	Proud boys don't start fights.
	They finish.
	Proud of your boy.
	I'll make you proud of your boys.
	Proud boys, stand back and stand by.
	I saw a headline I forgot to send you.
	It doesn't really matter.
	It said, do the Proud Boys know their theme song was written by a gay Jew?
	The assumption being Proud Boys hate gays and hate Jews, and they would be mortified to discover that Proud of Your Boy was written by a gay Jew.
	Yeah, it couldn't be more obvious that it was written by a gay Jew.
	I believe it was written by a gay Jew who died of AIDS.
	But like instead of it occurring to any of these people that there might be some humor involved, these people might be funny.
	They might be cool guys that could care less who's a gay Jew and think the song is funny.
	There's probably six gay Jews in the Proud Boys.
	There's way more than six gay Jews in the Proud Boys.
	But it goes back to that hashtag where they showed people making out and said, hi, I'm a proud boy and I'm gay.
	We don't give a damn.
	But anyway, Jay Bishop was not a proud boy.
	He was a Patriot Prayer guy, but he probably hung out with Proud Boys too.
	He's walking home.
	He was hunted by Antifa.
	I know you think cops hunt black guys.
	Well, not you, but they.
	They don't do that.
	But there are plenty of areas where radical leftists hunt conservatives.
	And Jay Bishop was hunted.
	He was stalked.
	We have footage and pictures of the scene with the guy who's wearing fucking sports sandals.
	Carrying a gun and wearing sports sandals?
	What are you doing?
	Anyway, that weirdo that Vice interviewed, what's his name again?
	Ryanelle?
	Raynell?
	Rayonell suggests that I shouldn't even be saying anything, but I feel it's important that the world at least gets a little bit of what's really going on.
	I think it's important that you do the interview so we can triangulate your phone and then go and fucking try to arrest you.
	Unfortunately, you're so stupid, you came out shooting and you died.
	Actually, no, that's not unfortunate.
	He's wearing sports sandals right now.
	It's just wrong.
	I want to be in vice so bad, I'm going to risk my life.
	Wearing leggings, too?
	I think he's wearing like, yeah, yeah.
	What the fuck?
	Imagine a man wearing thigh, no, calf-length leggings with sports sandals.
	And that's not the most masculine kill by the fashion police.
	Oh, I'm just getting funny now.
	The show's almost over.
	So anyway, Jay Bishop was hunted by that guy you just saw.
	They caught him, then just shot him dead.
	Like no discussion, no fight, just boom, boom.
	Ran away.
	He died where he lay.
	And so they had a funeral for him.
	There was plenty of Proud Boys at the funeral.
	One of the guys, I think, was named that guy.
	What's his name?
	Shane?
	What's his name again?
	It's a year.
	Enhance.
	Okay.
	You don't want to see that?
	Shane Moon.
	Shane Moon, that's it.
	So they go, they have a funeral for him.
	They go to a bar after they have speeches for him.
	They talk about Jay Bishop stories.
	They're all mourning the loss of their dead friend.
	Some guy, Black Lives Matter Antifa guy, decides this is unacceptable, starts picking fights with everyone.
	He starts taking pictures of people there to dox them, get them fired for going to a funeral.
	Bloods and Crips don't do that kind of shit.
	Gangsters, they leave funerals alone.
	They don't fuck with you when you're with your kids.
	Antifa hopes you're with your kids because you'll be more vulnerable and easier to attack.
	These people are sub-career criminals.
	And so they go, stop Filmina's.
	They push his phone away.
	He goes nuts.
	He jumps in his car and rams them.
	This guy goes flying onto the roof, onto the hood of the truck, falls down, smashes his head.
	He's unconscious.
	His head is bleeding.
	He's in the hospital for so long he loses his job.
	Wow.
	And the guy who ran him over, they catch him.
	They have pictures of him.
	They have footage.
	Everything's good.
	They do absolutely nothing, and now he's free to go.
	Exactly like the guy, like Noble Beard, who we had on yesterday, who was stabbed, and the DC police did nothing.
	And there's an interesting quote from him here on this.
	Go to the bottom.
	I'm angry.
	I feel like I was completely disregarded as the victim in this case because of who I am.
	I fought for my country.
	He's a vet.
	I fought for my country for years and don't ask for much in return.
	I do, however, expect the legal system in this country to do their job and provide justice, which was not done in this case.
	I was left out of the loop from day one, being told that I would be receiving a phone call to set up a meeting with the prosecutor, which never happened, or to call the victim's assistance unit with any questions.
	All attempts going unanswered and receiving one single phone call from the detective during this three-month investigation.
	The one-sided hypocrisy has become so blatantly obvious, it can no longer be denied or ignored.
	All right, that's all I got for that.
	I think we should start taking some calls.
	And we have a caller, thingamadoodle.
	I can talk to you about these.
	It's a really good one.
	I think we should call it.
	I also have some good final videos, but...
	You are on the air.
	I'm here to have a conversation.
	This is a fucking loser.
	You know, I'm here to learn, share, listen, understand why.
	Hey, why does everyone get two things?
	You have one thing.
	Thank you for calling.
	It's great hearing from you.
	Bye-bye.
	All right, next call.
	We're going to have to power through these pretty quickly, so no long chats.
	No, one more thing.
	Yeah, no, yeah, sorry, Columbo.
	It's just one thing that's bothering me.
	I was watching Gina Rollins, Jenna Rollins, a woman under the influence last night.
	John Cassavetes is the greatest filmmaker of all time.
	And when you look back at his movies, you see, before there was marketing, before there was Star Wars, where you had to have a mug and a video game and a pen related to it, movies didn't really care about merch or being popular.
	And they could just go off and really explore the character.
	And in Woman Under the Influence, you go crazy with her.
	And you're so stressed out when she's losing it because she's your wife.
	You're feeling everything.
	Now they go, I got to make people feel for this guy.
	Can you just kill his kids?
	Like Manchester by the Sea.
	Let's just kill all his kids in a fire in the opening scene and then everyone will feel sorry for him when you can be invested.
	Peter fuck.
	Peter Foggfuck.
	Peter Foggfuck.
	And they don't really lend themselves to trailers because they're not designed like that.
	It's hard to make young people appreciate movies like this because they're like, what's going on?
	I'm five minutes in.
	No one's died.
	We got Jack on the line.
	What's up, Jack?
	Hopefully he didn't hit the road.
	Hopefully he didn't roll down the hill to fetch a pail of water with Jill too.
	We get a little crazy on this show sometimes.
	Jack, you on the line, dog.
	You on the line, motherfucker.
	What's up, guys?
	Hey, man.
	I've actually had something I wanted to talk about for a few weeks, but after last week's caller, the heroin addict, I figured it was more pressing to share my experience.
	I've been a, well, I was the heroin addict for five years.
	I've been clean for about 10 years now.
	And I know some of the people recommended, not methadone.
	I don't recommend methadone.
	Some people did recommend methadone.
	I don't.
	And then the same with Suboxone.
	One guy wrote in and said he recommended Suboxone.
	It's a similar thing.
	It's basically just a replacement drug.
	And you're going to be kind of in the pharmaceutical pocket for essentially forever.
	But one thing I don't see enough people talk about is kind of getting to the root of what is kind of causing your addiction.
	For me, I had to kind of find purpose, something that gave me purpose and meaning in life.
	I've lost more friends than I have left from heroin.
	So I've seen a lot of people go down bad roads with bosoboxin, methadone.
	Kratom has actually been something that helped me early on.
	It's all natural.
	It's a plant.
	It's cheap.
	It's accessible.
	But I think it's mostly just a matter of finding purpose in life.
	I don't think enough people bring that up.
	So what was the purpose you found?
	I'm a full-time artist now, so I kind of found a way to express myself.
	And I've never been good at working for other people.
	And so when I was in the throes of my heroin addiction, I was working in the cubicle fucking doing tech support.
	And so it just kind of was a meaningless nine-to-five, why would I want to do this sober type of job?
	And so I ended up getting fired from that and then couch surfed with friends, had friends that were nice enough to help me out.
	I started a business early on, which went well for a few years.
	And then eventually I found my way into art and have been able to do that full time.
	So it's fulfilling.
	I don't feel, you know, I have friends who got clean and sober that they wake up every day still.
	And it's a battle.
	They're like, oh, I can't wait.
	I have to go to my NA meeting or my AA meeting and get this all figured out.
	And, you know, I'm feeling this stress today.
	I got to do this.
	And I don't feel that.
	I mean, I don't, the last time I thought about using drugs was when I saw the caller call last week.
	And it's not something I think about anymore.
	What about drinking?
	Do you drink alcohol?
	No, but I never really did.
	I smoke weed.
	You smoke weed now?
	You smell too often.
	Yeah, but not like on a regular basis.
	Right.
	I make pipes for a living, so.
	Yeah, the guy I started Vice with, Sarush Alvi, he found Allah.
	He found God, and that enabled him to go cold turkey, and he's never looked back since.
	I think a lot of people would do well to try to discover Jesus Christ.
	I think, and I'm not religious.
	I've always kind of found myself to have religious values, but I'm not, I don't subscribe to any one religion.
	As far as like AA and NA goes and the 12 steps, I know fewer people that that's worked for than it has.
	I have an aunt who was an alcoholic for 20 years, and she's basically addicted to AA now.
	You know, she goes to meetings basically every day, which for me kind of seems to have taken over her life.
	A lot of those types of people, they turn their sobriety into their addiction, which I think is better, obviously, than being an addict, but it can still impact your life negatively.
	And so I'm not going to say that those programs don't work.
	I think I'm an outcast in some ways in terms of what works for me and what didn't.
	But I think everybody tends to overlook, you know, what you can do for yourself.
	And as far as the 12 steps go, you know, finding a higher power, essentially submitting yourself to that higher power.
	You know, for me, I kind of realized I can be my own higher power to an extent of, you know, if I just find something that gives my life meaning and stops me from going out there and putting a needle in my arm,
	then I can kind of overcome that on my own, too.
	Right on.
	Well, that's great advice.
	Thanks for calling and congrats on winning.
	Yeah.
	Congrats on your sobriety, dude.
	And you also won a bunch of.
	Oh, yeah, you're the first caller.
	Oh, nice.
	Awesome.
	So you win Johnny Apple CBD, as well as Bubba and Hanks, as well as Beard Vet.
	Holy shit, that's a lot of stuff.
	Again, we got a lot of stuff.
	Fuck.
	Merry Christmas to me.
	Oh, no, you swore.
	We have a no-swearing policy.
	So I'm afraid we're going to have to go to a new caller.
	Well, shucks.
	Oh, no, you made up for it.
	You got to be back.
	You're back.
	Someone knows the rules.
	Yep.
	I better shut up before I do it again.
	Oh, you talk too much, and I'm afraid you're gone.
	Yeah, too many words.
	Anyway, Ryan will get your shit, and he'll call you soon.
	All righty.
	All right.
	Peace.
	This is Joseph Lebanese buddy.
	Oh, not this guy again.
	Joseph Lebanese buddy.
	You also won.
	Unless you don't respond.
	Ooh, this is going to hurt you, sir.
	If you...
	Let me double check to make sure this isn't on our end here.
	Everything went fine last one.
	There's about like a 0.5% chance.
	Hello?
	I think I just heard someone far away.
	Are you on the shitter?
	Do you have a cord phone?
	Uh-oh.
	He's out.
	That's too much.
	Bye.
	Thank you for calling.
	We tread Matthew talking about the usefulness of Christianity, also a winner.
	Oh, wow.
	Well, thank you guys.
	I'm very honored.
	Gavin the Great, Ryan the Red, thanks for taking my call.
	Thank you, Matt.
	The awesome.
	Yeah, well, you deserve it, bud.
	I'm going to try to do this call naturally.
	I'm going to heed Gavin's advice and try not to read a prompt.
	I was only wanting to, you know, get all my points across.
	But yeah, I just wanted to talk about my experience with going from a relatively atheistic point of view.
	I can basically boil it down to not believing in the spaghetti monster in the sky, I've heard.
	That's been something that it sounds funny, but it still has application to my belief on before.
	Yeah, I used to call him Santa Cloud when I was an atheist.
	Oh, I'm sorry, say that one more time.
	I used to call him Santa Cloud back when I was an atheist.
	Santa Cloud.
	I mean, I can see him wearing like a cloud-like beard.
	Just like pure white.
	All right, what do you got?
	Hurry up.
	Sitting on it like a eating bag.
	Yeah, it's just the, I wish I had said the pragmatic benefits of Christianity in the manner of, like, if you look at the Ten Commandments, they're straightforward.
	And it's kind of hard to disagree, in my opinion.
	I mean, I really thought about both sides, but I mean, it's hard to disagree with their intent.
	Like, Dennis Prager boiled it down to the tenth, which is to do not COVID.
	And I mean, that can apply to a lot of ill will in the world.
	And I can say in regards to like drug abuse, it's like you don't like yourself, but this makes you forget how much you don't.
	So you're just going to abuse it because you're going to rely on it.
	Or I guess in politics, communism, you can, obviously what I'm getting at with that.
	But yeah, I just wanted to bring that up and see if you have any solidarity to share.
	I mean, I feel like that guy earlier was pretty interesting that he called with his story.
	And then he kind of brought it up.
	But I don't know, he probably would benefit from hearing something in that regard.
	Because I think it's, I like to call Christianity like an algorithm for life.
	And of course, you could say other religions are algorithms too, but if you look at the grand scheme of things, Christianity seems to have a pretty good track record.
	Yeah, it seems to be the nicest one.
	Well, I'm glad that your faith has brought you joy, my friend.
	Thanks for calling.
	Also, please email Ryan at censor.tv with your shipping info.
	Because you just won.
	You did.
	See, it pays to love God.
	Very cool.
	All right, Toodaloo.
	Merry Christmas.
	Toodaloo, motherfucker.
	We're rewarding good people.
	People that recovered from addiction and people that have found God.
	Good stuff.
	Mark, you're in the line.
	Hello?
	Hello?
	Hello.
	Hello.
	Hey, what's up, Paget?
	What's up, dude?
	How y'all doing?
	Good.
	Pretty good, I guess.
	Merry Christmas, first off.
	Merry Christmas to you.
	Yeah, I was just trying to win some win some meets, but I guess that didn't work out.
	But what did I win?
	Oh, yeah.
	So I got a pretty gay song for you to check out.
	You probably won't like it, but I figured I'd give it a shot.
	Okay.
	All right.
	It's called Parasite Eve by a band called Bring Me the Horizon.
	So whenever you get it.
	Give it a listen.
	Okay.
	Thanks for calling.
	We'll check it out.
	That's your one thing.
	You used it up on a song.
	And we're going to give it a little listen here.
	All right.
	In the future, folks, unless you're introducing the greatest song of all time, I would probably not waste your one thing on a song.
	I like other stuff in this band.
	The third sound like the middle stuff.
	Stuff in the middle.
	No.
	A hard note.
	Really?
	What is that, like an anti-COVID song?
	That'd be cool if it was, but I don't.
	No.
	That wasn't their best song.
	That might have been the worst song I heard from them, actually.
	Caller, 617.
	You're on the line.
	Hey, from my circumcised dick to you, I'd like to say Merry Christmas.
	Merry Christmas.
	Merry Christmas.
	So I think, yeah, you came up with a great point earlier about how we're kind of heading towards people just voting on racial lines rather than just straight policies.
	Yeah, like think about Obama.
	Ask every black person in the country.
	I think it was 99% of blacks voted for Obama.
	Ask them to name any of the policies that made them vote for him.
	And I promise you that 99% of that 99% will admit, I just voted for him because he's black.
	Totally.
	I think there's a few comedians that actually went in the street and were like, oh, how do you feel about this Obama policy, which is actually just like a McCain policy?
	And they're like, oh, yeah, that's a great idea.
	And they're like, oh, that act, Obama's against that.
	It's for McCain.
	but yeah, it was really important that you brought that up because a major reason why the Middle East is a total shithole is because of that reason.
	If you look at like Lebanon or Iraq or any like country that has multi, you know, multiple races, like you've got Sunnis, Shiites, Christians, Kurds, whatever.
	They all are basically with one political party based on their ethnicity.
	And you can't have a country like that.
	And I think that's like kind of like the mindset that George Soros and the elite want us to have so that there isn't an America, there'sn't a unified country where we can have, you know, America first.
	We can end globalism.
	We're going to be too busy fighting amongst ourselves.
	Meanwhile, you know, hacks like Joe Biden can steal the election.
	I don't know what your thoughts are on that.
	Yeah, I think it's a terrible place to go.
	I mean, it's particularly un-American because you're saying, I am voting for this person because of their ethnicity.
	I don't care about policy, so I'm racist.
	You're creating a racist society, and we're supposed to be the one non-racist place, especially if you look at the whole West.
	The West is.
	Anyway, thanks for calling.
	It was great that I brought that up.
	I really nailed it.
	Caleb.
	Caleb.
	Caleb.
	Hey, yeah.
	I was a heroin addict, so boxing worked for me, but that's not why I called.
	Are you still on it now?
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	I mean, it was the only way I could get off heroin.
	How long have you been on it for?
	I'm a veteran.
	Five years.
	Whoa.
	I know that's not the best endorsement, but I mean, I was, you know, using opium in Afghanistan and heroin when I got home.
	Shit.
	Does the VA pay for your suboxone?
	Yes, sir, they do.
	Okay.
	So, I mean, at first, I had to pay for it myself, like $500 a month, because that's a whole racket in and of itself.
	But, I mean, when you're looking at heroin prices, you know, like it's cheaper than that, I guess.
	Yeah.
	Well, my buddies were getting up to like $350 a day with heroin, and that was, you know, back in the 90s.
	Yeah, like, it's insane how much you spend and able to steal and all that stuff to get what you need.
	But my question for you is, like, what is our Boston Tea Party?
	Like, I mean, if Biden does end up stealing this election, like, I know the go-to is like, oh, well, if they come to your door for your guns, that's when we act.
	But, like, that's kind of the problem with conservatives is like, you know, our motto is don't tread on me.
	And theirs is by any means necessary.
	And they're a lot more militant than we are.
	So, like, I just, I'm just so scared that, you know, America is just going to like shuffle off into the gulag with all this, like, Chinese people, like, paying for Biden and Democrats.
	And nobody's going to do a damn thing.
	You know, I know it sounds like I'm not an FBI agent, swear to God.
	But, like, you know, when do we act?
	Like, when do we do something?
	You know, or do we just go, oh, well, try in 2024, I guess?
	Yeah, I can't answer that question.
	You know, I'm not the guy who organizes the first day of the revolution or explains how it's going to go.
	But I do know that you keep pushing these people and taking advantage of them and printing more money like there's no future in the world and calling people who question Hunter Biden one-horse ponies.
	And eventually people are going to say, I've had enough.
	And I think we're starting to see that.
	You know, Alexis de Tocqueville, when he visited America in the 1800s from France, he said he was fascinated by America.
	And he said, you know, democracy is, he's coming from a monarchy, of course.
	Democracy is slow and sluggish and inefficient.
	But once it starts rolling, it becomes this boulder, like an Indiana Jones type of boulder, although he didn't use that analogy.
	And then nothing can stop it.
	So I think we're really at the end of our rope as a nation as far as abuse goes.
	And I think there's liberals and elites who are willing to take a lot more taxes and abuse, but I don't see America going the way of South Africa where they just kept taking it until they were locked into their homes with razor wire.
	Right.
	But we'll see.
	We'll see.
	Well, I hope so.
	Yeah.
	All right, man.
	Thanks for calling.
	We got a farmer.
	Is this the farmer?
	Stop saying that, Ryan.
	Of course he's a fucking farmer.
	Look at that cool picture.
	Oh, nice.
	I look shredded.
	Merry Christmas, fellas.
	You are shredded.
	That looks cool.
	Sorry, you just cut out a little bit.
	Hello?
	Farmer?
	Hello?
	Yeah, Merry Christmas, guys.
	Merry Christmas, buddy.
	Yeah, how you doing?
	Good.
	How are you?
	I got a suggestion and a question about the show notes.
	Okay.
	The suggestion is I think you should get your old man on the show more often.
	I think you should do a mailbag with your old man.
	Yeah, you're right.
	We were kind of in a fight recently because he wanted to invest in Censored.
	And I was like, dude, where were you when we started?
	Like, now we're making good money.
	We're solvent.
	I'm not really looking to dilute my equity now.
	You ever heard of buy low, sell high?
	It's not buy high, sell low.
	And I think he was pissed off at me for that.
	Yeah, I think he's a funny fucking guy.
	I will get him on the show more.
	I bought one of the show notes, and there was two pages.
	There was one page you could bid on, and one you can donate on.
	So I just donated.
	I didn't know how you really did it.
	Well, we haven't really done it yet.
	So you're probably the first one because it's an auction site.
	So I think what you do is you make a one-time donation, and then I just send you the show note.
	Okay.
	I get it.
	and when are you going to do the posters the same way?
	No, the posters won't be on the auction site.
	The posters will be.
	Maybe I should move the show notes over to our store.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	If it's a one-time thing, that's it.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Well, the reason I put it on the auction is because that goes right to Zenoa, and I don't think about it, and I see that as charity.
	But the posters are a product we're selling.
	So, no, the posters will be on the censored.tv store.
	Okay.
	Because I was watching the last episode, and you said the first 200 resubscribers.
	So I messaged your fucking customer service.
	I was like, here's my information.
	Just fucking send me one.
	Oh, yeah.
	You may have got in on that free glitch because we thought that Stripe was going to steal all our data.
	They said they would.
	And then we got all legal on them and they capitulated and gave us our data.
	But it was touch and go there.
	So I didn't want to lose all of you subscribers.
	So I said, you're going to have to resubve.
	That was the only way.
	They were going to just torch our data, not give it to someone else or anything.
	Just can it, delete it, lose it.
	So that's the analogy I kept using is you're at a crowded bar like in Manhattan and you say, all right, everyone, everyone has to leave, pay your tabs, leave, and then walk around the block and come back in and start new tabs.
	Like, how many people are going to come back in?
	Maybe half?
	So I was shitting my pants.
	That's why I made those posters.
	But now we've passed on the credit card info to the new processor and we're in business.
	Well, I really want one of those fucking posters.
	I called last time.
	All right, I think you may have snuck in.
	Anyway, well, let's not bore the people with our sales reports.
	Thank you for calling.
	All right.
	We got Steve Janowski.
	Steve Janowski.
	Hey, Gavin.
	It's me, Stevie.
	Hey, Stevie.
	Stevie Janowski.
	Remember me from high school?
	I wore the cape?
	Yeah, you were funny.
	Hey, Gavin, Merry Christmas.
	I think I can straighten out this whole, as a Christian, to either hate or not hate the Jew thing.
	Oh, boy.
	I went to private Christian school my whole life, and we were taught Old and New Testament, which was pretty clear, especially in Revelations, and I would say in the New Testament, Old Testament, pretty clear in all the other books.
	Support Israel, or you will be cast to hell.
	It says that everywhere.
	I don't know.
	Are these guys for real when they're saying, okay, and first of all, Jesus was a Jew.
	So how do you get around hating the Jews and saying you're a Christian?
	And number two, Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John were pretty good Jews as well.
	Not to mention Paul.
	Are you trying to get the Beatles?
	Couple bad Jews, like the Pharisees, and they were bad Jews.
	Maybe Judas was a bad Jew.
	It doesn't mean you cast out Israel.
	So go ahead.
	I didn't mean to interrupt you, but I want to finish the point.
	Yeah, no, that's a great point.
	Thanks for calling.
	Well, fuck you, man.
	That's it?
	I gave him the old faderoo.
	Brandon from Calgary, Alberta.
	Fuck.
	Alberta, fuck.
	Hey, Gavin.
	I just wanted to talk about that video you made about the white people being the cause of all the problems in society.
	Which one was that now?
	I think you released it yesterday.
	Essentially, your point was that it's not actually Jews that are the problem.
	It's high IQ whites yourself being.
	Yeah, like Rachel Maddow, is she Jewish?
	Yeah, like I just want to be clear.
	Like, I don't think that talking about Jewish is anti-Semitic anyway that it would be to be talked about white people or black people.
	But I just want to ask you a question.
	If you think that it might be a little hypocritical when you said, like, you have no idea where the self-hatred, high-hatred of whites come from, but then you proceed to point the finger at whites as being the perpetrators of this sort of,
	I don't know what other people would call a Jewish conspiracy.
	Also, I wanted to know if you knew like white people as a pejorative didn't even exist till after World War II, or wasn't at least commonly accepted.
	We considered ourselves European.
	You would be Irish based on your grandfather's descent, and I'd be Lithuanian, which is worse than Irish.
	Is that possible?
	I'm just kidding.
	Dude, how old are you?
	89.
	You're 89 years old, huh?
	Are you hot?
	Do you see how that made me?
	Why wouldn't you tell me your age?
	Why is that relevant?
	Why wouldn't you answer one or the two of the questions I asked?
	Because you're not being honest with me if you're not telling me your age.
	And what I was going to do is tell you that I've been through this 9 million times and I see the whole Jew thing, the whole back and forth just swallow up not just conversations as it's swallowing up this whole fucking show, but I see it swallow up people's creativity,
	their whole mindset.
	It just becomes the answer to everything.
	And I'm warning you as a young man, you sound like you're probably 25, that I feel you drifting into that rut.
	And it's an intellectual dead end.
	So drop it, dude.
	Please.
	Take your opinions on being intellectual seriously when you dismiss my last email because it's longer than 200 characters.
	Oh, it's you.
	It's the same fucking guy.
	All right.
	Thank you for calling, please.
	See, this is like when I had street carnage, I said, no censorship, nothing.
	Everything goes.
	And then these Jew guys, not Jews, but Jew guys, get on and they start doing that shit And talking about the Talmud and all this David Duke shit, and how you said this, but you won't talk about this, and why can't we talk about this?
	And when you first hear it, you go, Yeah, why can't we talk about this?
	And then they keep talking and talking, and it just covers every conversation: environmentalism, immigration, fucking 9-11, everything.
	Judy, Juju, Juju, Ju-Ju-Ju-Ju-Ju.
	The subject is officially banned for the rest of today's show.
	I'll talk about heroin, although that's getting a tiny bit tedious because it might save a life.
	But can we get some variety here, guys?
	Not going to see you for 10 days.
	Soundboard app.
	Yo!
	Yo.
	What's up, Gavin?
	How you doing?
	I'm well.
	How are you doing, sir?
	Good, good.
	Hey, just a quick thing.
	Can I give a suggestion?
	It'd be awesome.
	So, every time I try to find little sound boards of, I feel like I'm a dot.
	Or, you know, any of those, I'm retired.
	I'm beyond angry.
	I feel like I'm angry.
	Anywhere, dude.
	I am beyond angry.
	Sell it for $5 and give that to the Noah.
	Sell the soundboard?
	The app, yeah.
	Make an app.
	Yeah, like a soundboard app.
	So I could pull it up and just, so when, like, you know, my bullshit co-worker is saying something, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
	I could just pull up and I am beyond angry.
	Just pull it up.
	Yeah, that's a good suggestion.
	I'm not going to torch that.
	Thanks for calling.
	Hey, yeah.
	No, you don't get to.
	And it's funny how it becomes part of your mental vernacular.
	Like, when I came into the studio today, I know Ryan has a lot of work to do because I don't think he's done any of these fucking shows.
	He's about to lose $1,200 being laid on.
	I got a bunch lined up.
	But I saw that he wasn't here, and I knew he was just like fucking some broad instead of doing his work.
	And I just went, how dare you?
	Like, I didn't even know I was saying it.
	It was involuntary.
	That's Greta, though.
	We don't have Greta.
	We don't have Greta?
	We should have Greta.
	How dare you?
	How dare you?
	And we got Luke City Gypsy Crusader.
	Hey.
	Hey.
	Hey.
	How fucking good, you fucking rats.
	Come back.
	Fucking fake.
	Is that you?
	Dude, it sounds like you.
	No, no, but actually I found him.
	You found the guy?
	I found him.
	He is like the Brooklyn version of Sebastian Manascalco.
	The guy is fucking hysterical.
	Yeah, I think Anthony Coomia had him on.
	Nice.
	Yeah, he's funny.
	I just wanted, did you guys hear about, I'm sure you did, Gavin.
	What's his name?
	Gypsy Crusader?
	That sounds familiar.
	Yeah.
	We interviewed him before he was before he was like super whatever he is right now.
	But he was the guy.
	He got robbed in the technology.
	Oh, he was the guy, the weird guy who got beat up by Antifa the night of my talk.
	Yeah.
	Yeah, I saw him pop up on TikTok and shit.
	And I was like, what's this guy saying?
	He's saying all this crazy, racist shit.
	And then I found out his backstory about how he got jumped by Antifa at something in Manhattan with you guys.
	And it's just crazy.
	It's like creepy almost.
	Well, you know what happens to some of these guys is they get in the public spotlight and they seem to lose their mind.
	Like Joe Vival was a normal dude.
	And then he got bottled in the face by Antifa and now he wears a swastika pendant.
	Like, I think people just snap.
	He was also, I heard there's a thing, a show called Meth Squad, and they interviewed him.
	And he was like, yeah, I don't want this.
	Like, they just threatened my family.
	And I was getting, like, people coming to my house, to my family's house.
	And so I genuinely think that he was pushed there, but also he had nowhere else to go.
	Like, you know, he was being banned off everything for no reason.
	They're just posting political memes.
	Yeah, so what the alt-left does is it creates these right-wing nuts.
	Well, this is what they want, and they got it, and now they're going to have to deal with the bullshit.
	Yeah.
	That's all.
	Way to go, guys.
	All right.
	Thanks for calling, buddy.
	He's a fascinating dude.
	He seems like a good guy, but I think half of it, I think, he just says because it is inflammatory.
	No, he's nuts, dude.
	Oh, really?
	Oh, shit.
	Never mind.
	Like, he says, they stole my equipment, and then when he's listing his equipment, he lists a Batman mask.
	Wait, what?
	And I'm like, a really, really high-quality one.
	But now he's the Joker.
	So he's stealing the Batman masks now.
	Justin's on the line.
	Hey, guys, how are you?
	Merry Christmas.
	Merry Christmas.
	Hey, Gab, real quick, I just wanted to make one comment.
	You had mentioned earlier in the show about Howard, and he has kind of like a Kermit DeFrog voice.
	But when you listen to him, it's like really deep like this.
	Yeah.
	Since I've been home, because I live in a lockdown state, I used to listen to the show on my phone with my headphones.
	But now that I'm home, I can listen to it streaming through my system.
	Every single Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday, I have my speakers on a shelf, and I have the show just playing at a normal, quiet volume.
	You know, the kids are learning at home.
	The speaker rattles off the shelf every goddamn time.
	Really?
	Because the bass is so loud.
	Is it from the voices or like videos that we'll play?
	What?
	It's like from the last time.
	He's saying Howard Strimmer and so much bass.
	It flexed up the speaker.
	I thought he was talking about us.
	I thought he was talking about us because we do have bass.
	Are you talking about us or Howard?
	Oh, no, I'm talking about Howard.
	You guys sound great.
	I listen to you guys on the computer on the phone.
	Brian's interrupting the show once again to take away from him.
	He does not have proper modulation.
	It's very deep.
	And it rattles the speaker off the shelves.
	It's crazy.
	Yeah.
	I don't know if you listened the other day when Ralph was on the show.
	Sounds completely different when he was live on his own mic as opposed to calling in and being filtered through Howard's mic.
	It's just, yeah, it's pretty crazy.
	I don't know.
	I think it's funny because his voice is extra deep through the radio, But then it's usually like Kermit the Frog voice.
	Yeah, it's annoying.
	Have you noticed, too, that he wouldn't shut up about the masks?
	You got to wear the mask.
	We got to work together.
	We got to beat this thing.
	And then the vaccine comes out, and people are like, Are you going to get the vaccine?
	And he goes, Yeah.
	I mean, I don't really have a reason to get it.
	I never leave the house.
	I never leave my house.
	So I wouldn't want to take away from someone who wants to get it, who would need it.
	You fucking pussy literally.
	Did you know he was first in line with all this, like that, like, what is it, that mobile rich person testing?
	Yeah, it's because he doesn't want to leave his house.
	So it's like the vaccine is the worst thing for him.
	And he's got his probably his old lady wants to hang out with all of her celebrity friends and he won't let her leave the house.
	Well, he's also a fucking hypochondriac.
	So he's scared of the vaccine.
	Oh, yeah, most definitely.
	I mean, the dude's afraid of his own shadow.
	Fucking dork.
	All right, thanks for calling.
	I love to hate me some Howard Stern.
	I don't know why.
	It's hard to explain.
	Like, I listen to raw dog comedy in the car a lot, and I could just enjoy that and not torture myself with Howard Stern's bullshit, fucking limousine liberal opinions.
	But I just, I always, the dial always goes back there.
	And sometimes I'll yell, fuck you.
	In the car, I'll explain the thing.
	I'll go, it's because it's a different population, you fucking idiot.
	Because he'll just have something wrong, and it's such a basic misunderstanding of the thing.
	And then they all laugh at how dumb it is.
	Like when they laugh at Christianity.
	Oh, yeah, he's in the sky, and he can see you every day, huh?
	Yeah, sure.
	Sometimes you do some crazy shit.
	You were in a motorcycle act.
	That doesn't sound natural.
	You were in a motorcycle.
	Yeah, you're right.
	That sounds like at the beginning of a movie where they have those THX things and it's like, whoa!
	Just to show you the full dynamic range.
	When we really busted out, we could really rock this theater.
	Holy shit.
	You were in a motorcycle act.
	That movie looks a lot.
	That's my point.
	I mean, I say, if I was George Clooney, I wouldn't leave the house.
	I don't want anything to happen to my face.
	I have too good a life.
	You need subwoofers.
	That's what he says to everyone, too.
	Why would you leave the house?
	What were you doing?
	I wouldn't do that.
	That's too dangerous.
	I'd be scared.
	I'm scared.
	Scared, scared, scared, scared, scared.
	Ugh, hey.
	Blake.
	Hey, Merry Christmas, fellas.
	Merry Christmas.
	Merry Christmas.
	Hey, so if you had two bands that were going to disappear forever, and you got to choose one that would disappear, Led Zeppelin or Alice and Chains, what do you got, man?
	What was the first one?
	Led Zeppelin.
	Oh, my God.
	That's the easiest question I've ever wited in my life.
	Alice and Chains are fucking garbage, and I might actually kill them myself and remove their discography from everywhere in the world.
	And Led Zeppelin fucking rock.
	Okay, good.
	You answered my question then.
	Appreciate it, Philip.
	Merry Christmas later.
	Fool in the Rain?
	When do you ever not want to hang Fool in the Rain?
	Hear Fool in the Rain.
	Or the Immigrant Song?
	Holy shit, they were good.
	The only thing I don't get about Led Zeppelin is they must have been in the practice space after they did the songs the first time.
	Like the first time they finished Immigrant Song.
	They must have just been going, holy fuck, guys.
	This is like voodoo.
	That was the heaviest shit I ever heard, and it was me.
	We're intense.
	I love us.
	I bet Led Zeppelin are big Led Zeppelin fans.
	Troy.
	Wow, I'm drawing a lot better sober.
	Now we got Troy.
	Hey, buddy.
	Hello?
	Hello?
	Hello?
	Hello.
	Oh, wow.
	Cool.
	Hey, guys.
	So just thanks for doing the show first off, and then I'll keep it short.
	I really, really wanted to tell you guys about a crazy subreddit I found the other day that kind of broke my brain.
	And a lot of the crazy stuff that I hear come out of Gavin's mouth from the past or, you know, like crazy adventures, that doesn't fade me, but I really got to know.
	I got to get his opinion on this.
	It's a subreddit called Immobile.
	Spelled like I'm Mobile, which is the irony in that.
	But it's Reddit.
	I mean, you guys know how to pull a subreddit.
	I know Ryan does.
	Yes.
	But it's Immobile is the subreddit.
	R-Immobile.
	I need an opinion.
	Apparently, this is some kind of sexual thing, but I don't understand it at all.
	So not 2Ms.
	No, it's you can you spell it like I'm mobile.
	Immobile is spelled IMM.
	So yes, 2M's spelled correctly.
	It's basically people, you'll pull it up, it's people who are trying to eat enough to never be able to move.
	Like, that's the kink, I guess.
	I don't get it.
	And I need to know if I, I mean, this is worse than like beheaded like decapitation videos.
	I can't handle going on that place.
	I saw it once and I stepped away, but I'm in Sherry because he's horrific.
	Not all safe for work version.
	There's a way to just look at the scene.
	Never too big.
	Okay, thanks for calling.
	We'll check it out.
	It's like healthy at any size to the 10.
	Gross.
	You know, these people are blasphemous.
	God gave you this incredible gift, life.
	The life is held in a body, and you're just fucking throwing that away.
	That incredible, like all those, think of the complexity of your lungs and your fingernails and all this stuff.
	And you're like, is that a guy?
	I can't even...
	Is that even a.
	I think we could just show that, no matter what the gender is.
	So eager to get so much fucking fatter.
	Might make me a mobile blob I am meant to be.
	What?
	And then I think the people, because I've seen this on 600 Pound Life, you see like the Mexican dude that's with her kind of getting bummed out that she's losing the weight.
	They're feeders.
	Yeah.
	Shit, much more.
	And then you don't see him towards the end of the thing because he's gone off with another fatty.
	Shit, I fucked this up.
	This is Rat Face Dirtbag.
	I wanted to talk about a wedding.
	No, this is Rat Face.
	I wanted to talk about pegging.
	P-E-G-G-I-N-G.
	Oh, okay.
	Yeah, so I was watching the Atheism is Unstoppable video, and he put something out about pegging, and it reminded me of a funny story.
	About 10 years ago, I was in college, and I started dating this teacher, not a professor.
	She was a high school teacher that I met at a bar, and she told me she was into dubstep, which was my first clue that I shouldn't have pursued it, but it's cold out in the wild, so I went after it.
	Sorry, what city is this?
	Say it again?
	What city are we in now?
	We're in East Tennessee.
	Okay.
	So it's not literally cold.
	No.
	Gotcha.
	So I started.
	So I started, we started banging, and then about two weeks into it, we're driving around town, and she's in the driver's seat, and I'm in the passenger seat, and she says, what do you know about pegging?
	And for me, at the time, I had no clue what she meant, but I thought about my time in high school on the wrestling team.
	We had a pegboard where you could climb the wall with a pegboard, kind of like climbing a rope, but you just use your upper body and you move these pegs up the board and you pull yourself up the wall and then back down.
	So that's what I thought she was talking about.
	So she says, what do you know about pegging?
	And I said, oh, when I was in high school, I used to do that all the time.
	Being the wrestler in the room together.
	And I said, when I was younger, when I was a freshman, I wasn't very good at it, but the older guys taught me how to do it.
	Oh, my God.
	By the time I was a senior, I was the best in the room.
	Her eyes just start lighting up, and her mouth opens.
	And I'm looking over, and she runs to a red light.
	And I was like, what the fuck's going on?
	Stop the car.
	And she pulls over.
	And I said, what is going on?
	You're having like this reaction to what I'm saying.
	And she said, oh, my God.
	Like, I always thought wrestlers were gay, but what you're telling me, this is the greatest thing I've ever heard.
	And then she explained to me what she was talking about.
	And I got out of the fucking car.
	Never talked to her again.
	That's great.
	Thanks for calling.
	Good little jam.
	He got out of the car.
	He's the one who's the pegging master.
	He's the weirdo.
	She should have gotten out of the car.
	Freeloaders, beware.
	The hell?
	Hey.
	Is that a shit bubble?
	Are you in the bath?
	Brian Walker Rivera.
	Yeah, is this you, Bath You?
	You bat you.
	You're in the bath.
	No, no, no.
	I was bitching about the freeloaders.
	Are you in the bath, sir?
	I'm giving a bath to a three-year-old.
	Oh, okay.
	Gotcha.
	What is that?
	So, wow, you guys are very perceptive.
	Anyway, last week, Gavin, you mentioned something about a yellow discharge from your ana.
	Yeah.
	Is it also true that Milo spent the night with you?
	Yeah.
	That's just a coincidence.
	Perhaps there was some rancid jizz in your undershorts that day.
	Maybe someone tripped and fell.
	That's the name of my next book, Rancid Jizz in My Undershorts.
	Ranted Jiz that Day.
	Okay.
	Another thing, your doodle, I think you should start, you're going to sell more doodles if you do doodles of your drops.
	For instance, like, you know, being good at it, if you will.
	Oh, that's a good idea.
	A collection.
	Doodle drops.
	Also, last thing, I know I'm not supposed to ask for too much, but this is it.
	All right.
	Thanks for calling.
	Yeah, yeah.
	It was good catching up with you.
	Just don't announce it.
	Just try to sneak it in.
	You probably will fail.
	What was it, freeloader?
	He's saying he's bathing someone else, a kid?
	He's bathing a kid.
	A three-year-old.
	That's like slang.
	It's a joke.
	You call your kids freeloaders.
	All right.
	That's kind of an insidy joke to just throw out there.
	I didn't know that expression.
	Sorry, Ryan.
	Joseph again.
	Oh, okay.
	This is the Lebanese button.
	He's finally through.
	Well, then you get through twice, and you get through every show.
	Do you have a skip button?
	No, I'm just persistent.
	Okay.
	Typical Lebanese.
	But everyone else we talked to, like, fuck, I was on home for an hour and a half.
	I can't believe I'm on.
	I love you guys.
	What can I say?
	Listen, when I presented the COVID tracking project research shit, by the way, in the last week, they updated their website.
	Brian did a great job.
	They updated their website.
	Oh, okay.
	They changed it.
	They changed the whole look.
	Basically, they're downplaying their claim to authority and just presenting themselves as a factual, this is everything.
	You guys should look it up.
	But the point of my call was, as a little reference, but this week I want to highlight a short segment from a Theo Vaughan podcast from February 2019.
	And this guy, Theo Vaughn, I know you guys have heard of him.
	I'm sure you have.
	I think you mentioned him on the show a couple times in passing.
	But to me, he's one of these secret kings of the internet, like Norm McDonald, like where nobody really talks about him, but they get all this attention.
	Anyways, Ryan, look up, I sent you an email to the mailbag, Theo Von Proud Boys.
	The reason I have, I time stamped it.
	The clip is basically he has this guest on called Ari Shafir.
	We know he's a very ugly Jew.
	Okay.
	Yeah, you know Ari.
	He's funny.
	He's known for his controversial Colby Bryan helicopter death tweet.
	Yep, yep, I remember that.
	You know?
	He said something.
	Oh, boy, this guy really hates traffic.
	Yeah, I mean, it was like it was a true comedian tweet.
	Like, it was true what he said.
	Like, it was whatever.
	Anyways, the reason I bring that up is because Ari Shafir, as the guest, brings up in response to Theo's allusion to resisting the temptation of pornographic masturbation.
	he references Proud Boys.
	And for me, it's like, it's funny because I only dedicate my spare time to a few different people.
	One of them is you.
	One of them is Theo Vaughn.
	And I just think you should look into that collaboration potential.
	I know that, you know, you're calling.
	Oh, I know this dude.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	Yeah, man.
	Theo Vaughn.
	It's pretty cool.
	Instagram, so you can see it.
	Here's the first question.
	Wasn't he like a reality TV star or something?
	Like MTV, right?
	The Real World or something?
	Was he a Real World guy that became a comedian?
	Like, he's a cartoon character.
	His origin.
	I'll figure it out.
	Yeah.
	Dio RE got a dark art survivor here.
	Gang, bro.
	In Atlanta, Georgia.
	What's dark arts survivor?
	Dio RE.
	People that survive the dark arts.
	The dark arts are things that take you out of your element to succeed.
	So excessive masturbation, doing drugs, you know.
	Australia, it sounds like.
	Australia.
	Am I a dark arts survivor if I do all those and don't let it hold me back?
	Gang, gang.
	Yeah, you're more of a dark arts master, I think.
	See, I struggle with it.
	I'm always the fucking guy who's fucking up, but you really seem like a real savant.
	Like, you're Slytherin.
	Oh, yeah.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	And I'm just some fucking Hufflepuff who keeps fucking, you know, copping bads.
	Potter references?
	They both are.
	So, yeah, you mastered the art.
	So is this kind of like Proud Boys, but like your own sect?
	Yeah, no, this guy's just a guy who probably trying to stay off of drugs and maybe trying to not to jerk off at night.
	Okay, that's cool.
	Yeah, there's our big nemesis.
	All right.
	Our guard survivor here.
	I wonder if that's it.
	In Atlanta, Georgia.
	And I have a question for both of you guys.
	You come to the conclusion.
	And gang.
	And gang, baby.
	There you go.
	Let's get a gang from Jupiter.
	I thought you said it was time for me to come to the decision.
	It was, man, I take too many chances.
	That's what it was?
	Yeah.
	Oh, man.
	So this guy just wasted so much of our time.
	He goes, I listen to your show.
	I listened to that show.
	And then this show mentioned Proud Boys.
	You know who else mentioned Proud Boys?
	The President of the United States.
	So this is not some fucking groundbreaking controversy, dude.
	Jesus Christ.
	You're persistently calling back every episode for that?
	I have some good news.
	We're going to stay on the line until we get an okay call that's not a complete waste of time piece of shit from Aleb.
	Imagine he calls back.
	Hey guys, one more thing.
	I just waited on hold again.
	All right.
	We got Danny from Queens.
	Good day.
	Uhuru.
	Uhuru.
	Hey.
	So I saw a couple of episodes ago.
	You were talking about the girl Chrissy from Intervention.
	And I got an update on her.
	Oh, good.
	What do we got?
	So she was arrested in 2011 for grand larceny, felony.
	Then 2013, crime against a public peace and health safety violation.
	I don't know what that means.
	Maybe that's like the name of the officer.
	They're a peace health and safety officer, and she attacked him?
	I don't know.
	It just says a health and safety violation.
	So maybe she's out here giving diseases out or something.
	Okay.
	And then she got felony, assault with a deadly weapon in February 2015.
	And then she was spreading diseases again in May 2015.
	And then she had a baby in like December 2014.
	What's her name?
	What?
	What's her real name?
	Oh, Chrissy.
	Her name's Christy.
	Chrissy, what?
	It's Christy Celaya.
	C-E-L-A-Y-A.
	I got a, if you Google Christie Intervention Taco Bell update, because there's a video too.
	She's got a Taco Bell cracked out spitting at people.
	I wonder if she's...
	She looks kind of Native American in the first time I saw her, but now she looks more white.
	Oh, you got the sarcasm one?
	No, the Taco Bell update.
	That's not coming up.
	Chrissy Intervention Taco Bell update, right?
	Yeah, but you're looking in YouTube, right?
	No H, and there should be a Reddit.
	Oh, and Reddit.
	It's the first one.
	Gotcha.
	I can send it to you right now.
	I don't know what the email is, though.
	Is she still hot?
	I mean, she can get it.
	She's not really hot, though.
	We're not going to kick her out of bed for eating.
	You might like it, though.
	She looks like she's up here at Leo.
	All right.
	Thanks for calling.
	We're going to check her out.
	All right, man.
	All right, bro.
	She's got...
	Like, I did meth once by accident.
	We thought it was MDMA.
	And I was up for three days, got fucking wasted, saw Jesus, became, cured cancer, and then woke up, had it seemed like 10 days of hell hangover.
	And I just thought, well, I'm never going to that weird planet ever again.
	And she's been on that planet for years?
	Like three days felt like getting thrown off a building.
	She's on it for years?
	That's my friend right there.
	I'm going to do it.
	Are you sure this is her?
	I'm waiting.
	Yeah, I'm waiting.
	I don't know.
	This fits the whole...
	The bill.
	Wait, wait.
	Go back.
	Is that her?
	It did kind of look like her.
	What's...
	Why is like half of her dark?
	Is that just the lighting or is she wet?
	No, yeah, there's a headlight in front of her.
	It does look like.
	She's being lit by headlights.
	Oh, shit.
	Fucking stop.
	Piss your pants, you fucking crackhead.
	What'd she do?
	It was pissed.
	How is she pissed?
	Remember, every time Ryan says something, it's the opposite.
	She was also lit by headlight.
	Like half of her was dark.
	Yeah, it's piss.
	She's drenched in piss.
	Alright, let's do another call.
	Not good.
	Okay.
	This one just says Ryan.
	How's it going?
	Hey, Ryan, how are you?
	How are you?
	My name is Ryan, and I have a dad.
	How are you?
	I could relate to half of what you just said.
	Yeah, I'm just calling.
	I just wanted to just clear some things up.
	I just wanted a straight answer on this one.
	Would you rather have a car company that doesn't make solar panels, or would you rather have a roofing company that does make solar panels power your home?
	What was the second one?
	Yeah, would you rather have a car company that does not make solar panels?
	Or would you rather have a roofing company that does make solar panels power your house?
	Are you like a bad, like a villain from a movie?
	This is like a Riddler's.
	No, I'm just asking, which one is it?
	Which one would you prefer?
	I guess we'll do the roofing company.
	The roof.
	I was going to say.
	I'll do the roof.
	The roofing company.
	Okay, so I need people to hop off Elon Musk's dick or cockrocket over here, okay?
	Because, you know, I'd prefer a roofing company with solar panels.
	Oh, I see.
	Great to hear from you.
	Elon Musk thing.
	Okay.
	I see what you're saying.
	Last call.
	Hope it's a good one.
	Defend the police or something about the police.
	707, you're on the line.
	Oh, hey, guys.
	Hey, man.
	Hello.
	Hey, Gavin.
	So I had this moment because there's all this deep on the police talk that's been going on for a long time.
	And I know it scares people like you and me or conservatives, especially if you lived in a big city.
	I live in kind of a big city.
	But I had this moment where I thought about, well, if conservative towns or conservative counties, say they lost half their police or something, it seems like we would, you know, whether they're proud boys or not, the conservative guys would kind of do some community policing,
	self-policing, something.
	And we would actually probably do things right.
	And I feel like the left-wing cities would just decay.
	And it would be, we don't want, like, you and me don't want to see the decay happen in the left-wing cities because it's just going to be so much crime and murder.
	But what do you think about it in like right-wing communities?
	Would you think that we actually have a chance at that kind of policy?
	Well, without a doubt.
	I mean, Plano, Texas, I think, has the lowest crime in America.
	They have the highest gun rate per capita.
	More guns, less crime.
	And if you look at the south side of Chicago, Baltimore, those places have been swallowed up by crime.
	There's no saving them.
	There's no conservatives policing them.
	So there's no police policing them.
	And that means that 20 blacks die a day.
	And the Dems wish this on black communities, I guess.
	They're more effective than the Klan at eradicating black people.
	And we fought.
	That's the thing I always say is I'm like, I'm fine.
	Like, I got money.
	I'm armed.
	I got my family.
	I'm good.
	Trump was actually bad for me tax-wise because I live in a liberal enclave and I think he punished us.
	But it's you I'm worried about.
	It's you, America.
	And we sit here, we keep screaming, stop doing that, you're killing yourself.
	It's like a fat person.
	You say, stop eating all the time, dude.
	You're going to get heart failure.
	You're going to die.
	And they go, fuck you.
	You worry about you.
	And you're like, okay, I'm fine.
	I'm going to live.
	But yeah, great point.
	Thanks for calling.
	All right.
	That's it, folks, for the show.
	Stay tuned to my parlor, Gavin McInnes, for updates throughout the holidays.
	We've made sure that you're well taken care of.
	Thank fucking God, we got that payment processor figured out.
	Like, I am literally Hitler.
	I'm Adolf Hitler.
	When banks see my name, everyone just drops everything.
	Soon I won't be able to fly.
	Soon I won't be able to get hotels.
	I'm going to have to get a fake identity.
	But I'm never going to stop fighting.
	I can't.
	I'm just going to keep chugging along like a little engine that could.
	I remember the Seinfeld was asked, what are you doing?
	Why are you driving around comedians with cars?
	You got your money.
	And he goes, I'm a woodchuck.
	A woodchuck chucks wood.
	I'm a beaver.
	I just got to keep gnawing away at trees.
	And I'm a fighter.
	So I have to keep fighting for what's right.
	It's in my bones.
	And I want it to be in your bones, too.
	More specifically in your boner.
	Let's procreate.
	Let's get married.
	Let's find a lady.
	Let's put a ring on it.
	Let's love her when we do procreate.
	Respect her.
	Don't beat off.
	Be nice to her.
	Don't be too nice, though.
	They don't like that.
	Don't tell her about it.
	Don't tell her all your crazy dreams, like Billy Joel says.
	You still got to be a man.
	Don't share a bathroom with her.
	And divide up the chores.
	You know, you take the garbage outside.
	You do the dishes maybe once a week.
	She does the dishes and cooks most of the time.
	You can clean up a little bit.
	You do all the big stuff outside, the fieldwork.
	You take the hoses in.
	You store them.
	You clean the garage.
	She cleans the kitchen.
	She plans the vacation.
	You load up the car.
	She packs for the kids.
	You pack for yourself.
	Do your own laundry.
	You don't want her washing your shit stains.
	And it's enough that she has to sort all the different kids and get all that organized.
	She shouldn't have to deal with your t-shirts folding your t-shirts.
	You do all your own laundry.
	That way, they'll never get mixed up with anyone.
	You won't see your son wearing a shirt or something.
	Look at that beautiful, beautiful bird.
	Do your job.
	Play your cards.
	Think big.
	The amazing thing about being a man in the Western world is you're in your own movie.
	It's sort of like lucid dreaming where all of a sudden you can just fly.
	You can control where this is going.
	You can fuck it up with your bad, with your dark arts.
	Or you can make it happen.
	You can make it exciting as you want, as dangerous as you want.
	And people go, yeah, yeah, if you're rich.
	You know what?
	If you want to get rich, go near money.
	People who work in finance, people who work in banking, people who, if you want lots of money, be near it.
	Like if you want to fuck supermodels, Be near them, get involved in fashion, become a photographer.
	Neither of those things have ever interested me.
	I'd like to fuck models and be a billionaire, but not enough to sit there and work through finance.
	I'd rather do this kind of stuff.
	And it ends up working itself out.
	And you just got to be true to yourself.
	You know, they say that the happiest people, the most satisfied people, are the ones who surround themselves with people they can be most themselves with.
	If your cheeks hurt from fake laughing or you can't come up with a weird thought that you had, like an adventurous thought, like remember when Rush said, if you couldn't charge rape after taking a guy home, women would be a lot more selective about who they brought home.
	Now, he's not saying legalized rape, but he is saying kind of a controversial, dangerous, kind of a brain puzzle.
	Now, he was almost murdered for that because it was misinterpreted.
	But you want someone where you can say weird things like that to and bounce off ideas.
	That's how you're happy.
	And if you're at work and you're constantly stewing, if you work at MSNBC and you got to turn down the volume, I understand that.
	But don't let it eat away at you.
	If things start to eat away at you and you're like, I'm not me, then change that.
	You need to be you to be happy.
	You're going to make yourself bald and give yourself cancer if you constantly hold it in.
	So get fired.
	Get in trouble.
	Be brave.
	Merry Christmas.
	Happy New Year.
	And never stop fighting.

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