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July 6, 2020 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes
01:18:15
S02E182 - THE LOST GIRLS [2020-07-06 - S02E182 - THE LOST GIRLS]
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Time Text
Being good, I'm a bad bitch.
I'm sick of motherfuckers trying to tell me how to live.
Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes.
I'm a boss and draw with him.
He fucking with the stay and cuz he in the wild women.
Put them legs on his head, now he loves tall women.
You'll never catch me calling these niggas.
Ah!
Bye.
That was the incredibly creative Megan the Stallion Girls in the Hood.
Go find the other video, Ryan, the remix video.
So she just ripped off Boys in the Hood from NWA.
And then her video is Mad Max.
So that's a ripoff of a rip-off.
Because Tupac already did a Mad Max video.
Right?
Yeah, California.
California goes out to party.
California goes out of party.
California goes out to party.
In the middle of these madmen, they want to hurt me.
I'm a hot girl.
I do hot spinach fans.
Shut up, you stupid bitch.
Looks like Thin Lizzo, but not Thin.
Thin Lizzo.
The girls are back in town.
Where are they?
When black girls are that dressed up, you look at her and you're like, I wonder what she looks like.
Because I have no idea.
Everything you see is fake.
It's the same with Gwen Stefani.
She always has so many layers of makeup on.
You look at her and go, I wonder what she looks like.
Right.
If you have to go to like the prop department to get ready for the day, that's not good.
But then there's some girls that they could be covered in diarrhea and you'd go, what a knockout.
Like I saw Cloverfield with the kids.
Great movie for your kids if they're like 12, 11, 12 and up.
I would not recommend it for youngsters.
But there's a chick in that who is...
Prepare to poop in your panties, gentlemen.
And ladies, prepare to feel insignificant.
That's how I feel every day.
What's the cast?
Jessica Lil.
Odette Annabelle.
Odette Annabelle.
That's a weird picture.
Okay, just look her name.
Just put her name into Google or Dr. Images.
That's a way better way to look at broads.
Yeah.
What the fuck is that?
I don't really like all any of those pictures, though.
She's a good actor.
You're supposed to say actor.
But she's not really in anything.
I guess she doesn't put out...
Which is why you should never let your daughter become an actress.
It's prostitution.
All of those women have sucked their way to the top.
And all those women hung around with Harvey Weinstein.
Oh, that's a good picture of her.
Maybe not.
All of those women, all of those bitch actresses knew about Harvey Weinstein and loved him.
Whatever.
He gets gigs.
And then it became unfashionable and they fucking threw him under the bus.
I almost chose this song with Erica Badu, who this genius nerd managed to channel her mental illness into a song.
Medulla Blangata.
Up in this bitch, Erica Badu.
Bitch!
Should we make something?
Let's do it.
All right, let's make something.
Those are those little looping things that Reggie Watts uses.
Aren't white men amazing?
We can take mental illness and turn it into a cool song.
What the fuck is on her head?
A polygon?
Anyway, how was your July 4th, Rye Guy?
Pretty cool.
Pretty fun.
Lots of fireworks, lots of food.
Did you get laid?
No, I did not get laid.
Why are you so...
I'm not allergic to pussy.
Frankly, that's what he says.
I don't get laid for one weekend.
What is it?
He's allergic to lawyer.
One week?
One year?
One weekend.
When did you last get laid?
It's been a long time since I rock and rolled.
It's been a long time.
You got two chicks at your house begging to 69.
Your house.
And they weren't there.
And you're like, I better get them a blanket.
They're begging for blankets and AC and food and smells to be gone and ding and dong.
Why July 4th?
Couldn't have sucked more.
It was my worst ever.
We were invited to this people's house and I've got my outfit on, an incredible ensemble that's top to bottom.
Gorgeous.
Including a USA fanny pouch.
Look how hot I am.
Anyway, I'm ready to go, like at one.
And now they're at their country club and they've had trouble.
The pool, I guess, goes in shifts at the country clubs.
So they didn't get their shift till like five.
And I go, I said to my wife, why the fuck did they invite us over then?
You don't invite people over for July 4th, but also go to your country club that day.
Why don't you go fucking golfing?
Why don't you go to Disneyland the day of your fucking Christmas party?
The fuck?
So we're not invited over till 6.30.
And I was so pissed, I just had to go to a bar.
And I said, I'll take my motorcycle.
I'll meet you there.
This is fucking, I've got to get out of this funk.
And it worked like a charm.
Isn't that an amazing thing about a bar?
Boop.
I was ready to murder people.
Anyway, my wife and the woman there, they organized The whole thing.
They went and got fireworks.
I didn't handle anything.
I don't know why.
Usually, our town has fireworks and they cancel them this year.
And I, I don't know, I didn't, I failed.
When you're really mad about something, you're often mad at yourself.
And I think I'm mad at myself.
So, in fucking Connecticut, first of all, in New York, you cannot buy fireworks anywhere.
In Connecticut, they don't have projectiles.
What?
What am I?
Two years old?
It's just the fuzz things.
It goes about four or five feet high.
Terrible.
My son, my youngest son, Johnny, was like standing right next to it.
And here's a doozy.
You ready for this one?
The male host of the party went into the pool to be safe.
To be safe from the fireworks.
We had the weakest, gayest fireworks I've ever been around in my life.
And he was in the pool.
And then I was thinking later, wait a minute.
If I thought something was so dangerous that someone was going to get hurt, I'd have my wife and kids in the pool.
Right.
And I would be standing there, like, ready to put out the fire.
That's like a prolonged version of that avalanche movie where he just throws his kid and wife to the house.
Woman and children first.
You guys go check it out.
So there's a place in Pennsylvania called Phantom.
It's the best place.
You know it, right?
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, you used to work right down the street from there, didn't you?
That's Madam Morris PA.
Madam Morris, yeah.
So they have a deal that's two for one if you spend 400 bucks.
So me and my African-American comrade, Curtis Brown, would go down there and we'd each spend 200 bucks, which gets us to 400, which means we have $800 worth of fireworks.
And then we would go to these homos who live nearby.
They have a big graveyard in their backyard.
They bought a church.
And it was like nom.
We would each have lighters and I wouldn't even see them.
I was just going and we would just dazzle the party.
Dazzle them.
This was just.
Imagine a chick bought your fireworks.
Imagine how gay they would be.
It's colorful.
No, it wasn't even that colorful.
So that was the worst July 4th I've ever had.
You had a blast.
Lots of cool fireworks.
The fireworks were off the chizzy.
Everyone was sending me pictures too.
Like Maddie Odell was sending me this.
It looked like a military operation.
It looked like Serbia.
Just yeah, the whole thing was like smoky.
Like it was just, we were just in smoke.
Fucking Tommy Morello in Brooklyn.
They take over their entire block.
You know those things, those ones that go, oh yeah.
They had massive roles of those.
They rolled down the streets.
I have footage of them setting that up at the place that I got here.
Legend has it that he has these welders that are his neighbors that compete with each other to make cannons.
And when the cops show up, they just go, we don't know what the fuck?
Jesus.
Where the hell did that come from?
Yeah, that's what they had.
The entire street.
And what am I looking at?
I'm looking at something I would hold in my hand, no problem.
I would light it off indoors.
The smoke might set off the fire alarm.
Maybe.
That's how fucking lame it was.
But there was cool people out there doing cool stuff.
Do you have those links I sent you?
One, three?
What was that?
So LA said, from now on, fireworks are illegal.
Oh, that one's cool.
Look at this guy.
I think this is an old video.
I'm pretty sure I've seen this before.
But this is what was...
How awesome is that?
I hope you got oven mitts on, dude.
What the hell?
You know, that might be the best thing in the world.
Like, what's better than that?
Seeing motorhead, front row seats?
Yeah.
It's pretty odd.
I don't even think getting blown while doing that would improve it.
I think it would take away from it.
That might be better than a blowjob.
Oh, yeah.
It looks cooler.
Yeah.
Okay.
When are those things going to end?
Okay.
And then look at LA.
So LA is told, I used to hate LA before I saw this video.
LA was told, no fireworks anywhere.
You will be arrested.
And LA said, okay, no problem, boss.
Wait, is that a picture?
10 minutes, 15 minutes or so.
Look at that.
Fuck you.
To the bureaucrats telling people what to do.
Those have got to be Mexicans, right?
Yeah, that's what it must be.
Illegal aliens with illegal fireworks.
Wow.
Actually, you know what?
While I was in my funk at the bar, preparing to go to my very late, worst July 4th of all time.
Of all time.
There wasn't even anyone there.
They had one family come over as guests.
Okay.
Luckily, he had just been canceled.
So he had a good story.
I'm at the point now where I think we're at 100% cancel rate.
I was just in the bathroom looking at Instagram.
John Joseph Cro-Mag was supposed to be the front of their Lululemon's male line.
I guess Lululemon was going to have a male clothing line.
John Joseph Cromag, the fittest person possibly alive, regularly does triathlons.
But he wrote a book called Meat is for Pussies.
He's a vegan.
And other vegans found that offensive, so they harassed Lululemon until they canceled the whole thing.
Because he said the word pussies, and that's sexist.
Meanwhile, this guy's fucking life has just been, he was an orphan as a kid, raised on the streets of New York, abandoned by his parents and foster parents, abused by foster parents.
Anyway, so I'm in the bar and the bartender's telling me about a disgusting thing that happened to him.
Ready for the gross?
So he stands on a nail.
It gets tetanus.
It's infected.
It gets so badly infected, the antibiotics were doing nothing.
So they cut the pad of his toe off.
Now, the pad is a very important thing.
So now, without the pad, every time he takes a step, his toe touches, his toe bone touches like the edge of his skin.
It's almost puncturing the skin now.
Why are you freaking out, you fucking?
Because I can feel it.
it's not even that gross.
It's just annoying.
Anyway, I came up with this idea.
Use your weenus.
You know, this skin here on your elbow is called weenus?
Let's cut off a piece of that, a nickel-sized piece, stitch it up, and put the weenus on your toe.
And then I came up with this idea, intuitive surgeon, because I was like, I'll do it.
Have a Xanax, some fucking beers.
And then you'll do it right now.
No, I won't take the Xanax.
I have to be sober.
I might have a beer.
And there's two homos at the end of the bar.
And I'm in a great mood now.
And I'm like, what do you think of that?
It's a new thing.
Intuitive surgery.
And obviously you can't do it here, but like in another country.
And then there's a white gay and a Chilean gay.
Chile is very homophobic.
So if you're gay in Chile, you better get away.
Chile, it's a gay.
Chile, I'm gay.
I just took your joke and made it worse.
I just repeated it with less words.
Anyway, so the white gay, and this is what I hate about mixed race couples, the white is always so proud of their little token.
So he is like, he's a Chilean.
Did you know that?
South America?
Yeah, I'm very familiar with Chile, and you're pronouncing it wrong.
And it is the West, okay?
ABC in South America, Argentina, Brazil, Chile.
They are as Western and rich as America, Canada.
The rent is the same as it is here.
There's nothing different about Chile.
So, fuck off.
Even their flag is like Texas flag.
And he's like, and then the Chilean obviously is civilized and doesn't fucking need this bullshit.
He's not a token.
He's like, yeah, no, you couldn't do it in Chile.
Maybe Colombia.
And I'm like, yeah, Nicaragua.
And then the dumbass white guy realizes he's in over his head.
He was bragging about having a Chilean boyfriend.
Meanwhile, that's like bragging that your friends from fucking Sweden.
And then he was like, Costa Rica, maybe?
No, dickweed.
Costa Rica is pretty darn civilized.
He started joining in?
Yeah.
Because he realized like the CIA retires there, so they make sure it's in control.
It's the one country in Central America that's safe.
Panama.
But wouldn't that be fun?
I moved to Nicaragua and people come in with a problem and I'm just like, hmm, let's try antibiotics.
Oh, there's a weeping sore.
I'll try, like, I guess I'll wash it and then I'll try stitching it up.
And is this free?
No, you pay me.
Oh, what the fuck?
So I have very bad infection on pinky.
I have to have it remove.
Okay.
I assume you like, you cauterize it or something?
You just yell it.
Get out a hacksaw.
I bought this online.
It's numbing stuff.
I'll inject that in.
Blacks do it all the time.
You know those fucking butt guys?
Butt guys?
Yeah, the guys who make your fake butt?
Oh, yeah.
A woman was putting it.
Some guy was putting an insulation foam into women's asses.
They died.
Well, you might have some deaths.
oh I'm gonna have some deaths It's Nicaragua.
I'm not going to go and cut your finger off, but if you come to me, She can flip her ass cheeks into like Hellboy's horns.
You're going to be heaving a lot.
If you can't look at a picture of that.
Oh, my God.
How are you going to cut up a person?
Why the fuck?
I do not get butt implants.
I don't mean I don't have them.
I mean, you're sitting on your ass.
Look, you look at 650-pound life.
They're sit on their ass so much, it's misshapen, and it's a big shelf thing.
You know?
That's a real ass that God made, and it can't handle sitting on it all the time.
So implants, you're constantly sitting on implants?
Like take a tit thing, a silicon tit implant, and just sit on it everywhere you go.
Cement everywhere.
It's going to be destroyed.
I don't understand.
All right, I've got a great, exciting story, Ryan.
You ready?
Yes.
It's even better than the Chilean bar story, which was a lot less fun than I thought it was.
It seemed really interesting when I wrote it down here.
So I'm at the beach this weekend, not far from my home.
And I bring my son there, and these three women come up to me, walk up to me, and I go, here we go, Karen Alert.
And they go, hi, I just want you to know I'm a huge fan of your podcast.
These women were like 40, 50, 60, right?
And they go, we think the way you were treated in your neighborhood was terrible.
I think my son has introduced himself to you.
His name's Luke.
And, you know, we're really glad to see you here, blah, blah, blah.
That's awesome.
You're great.
And, you know, you've really been wronged.
You and your family have been wronged.
And we think it's just terrible.
We're so angry at the people who harassed you and your family.
I was like, well, thank you very much.
That's very nice.
So I'm sitting down.
It's hard to get my youngest to play because these fucking screens have ruined his mind.
So apparently in the game Brawl Stars, there's gems.
And you need that makes buys you more shit.
So I said, tell you what, if you catch three crabs, I'll give you 175 gems.
If you get one crab, I'll give you 80 gems.
Next thing you know, he's hunting for crabs like a monster for two hours.
I had to bribe him.
Anyway, so I'm sitting there and I'm reading the New York Post and this gorgeous, hunky, blonde male model that is beefcake comes over and he's holding his chain Like this, and he starts doing a sexy dance, like a very hippie, like hip using your hips, very ass dance that you would expect a black woman to do, like the woman we just saw.
That Megan the Stallion.
He did a Megan the Stallion dance holding his chain.
And then he says, You're not welcome here.
What?
And then he goes to the dance?
Yes.
Ew.
And then he goes up to each of the lifeguards and says something.
And then he goes back.
He's a lifeguard.
Then he goes back to the lifeguard tent, right?
So now I can't fight him with my son right there.
So I put a shirt on.
I go, Johnny, come here.
I go to the tent and I say, stand there in the cool sand so you don't get hot, but stand here and wait here.
And I go over and I just walk into his tent.
He goes, get the fuck out of my tent.
No, get out of my tent.
He wasn't swearing.
I go, what the fuck's your problem?
What's your problem?
You fucking retard.
And he goes, what is your little dance?
He's like, he just keeps going, get out of my tent, get out of my tent.
Like in a loop.
I go, you should make a t-shirt of that.
And then.
Get off my loan.
Get out of my tent.
And then I go, I'm not getting out of your fucking tent.
Like I was going to take a step back.
Sorry.
While I'm yelling at you, I'll be in the correct position.
I respect your plastic four walls.
I go, what's your little game?
Your chain?
He goes, it's Star David.
You didn't see it?
No, you were like 15 feet away, you faggot pussy.
And the funny part I'm realizing now is it wasn't a Star David.
It was that Hebrew word that looks like pie.
Oh, Lechaim?
Lechaim?
What does that mean?
Life.
Life.
I have life on my neck.
Hi, I'm a big life fan.
As you can see, I'm living it.
Hi, I'm alive.
Anyway, so he's got a life Jewish thing, but he doesn't have it.
The other guy has it.
And he goes, you hate Jews or something like that.
And I go, yeah, that's what was around his neck.
And I go, what?
And he goes, the Proud Boys.
And I said, Proud Boys Israel, there's hundreds of fucking Jewish Proud Boys.
What the fuck are you talking about?
And then when I call them a fucking imbecile and retard and stuff like that, they go, oh, we better get Pat or whatever the main lifeguard was.
So to be clear, I didn't go to their bosses.
I was taking it up with them.
And you know what I realized after?
He didn't have the chain anymore.
And the other Jewish guy who was sitting down, he was the one with the L'chaim around his neck.
So then I found out later, he complained to the beach manager that he feels uncomfortable with me there as a Jew.
These are all fucking rich kids, by the way.
In a Jewish neighborhood where they get whatever they want, whenever they want.
But they're pretending to be black.
So this pussy gives, the white guy probably goes, I'll go handle it.
I'll tell him to fuck off.
Here, give me your chain.
I'll be the Jew.
So the blonde buff guy wears the Jewish chain, comes over and does his little dance.
So when he was drawn to the channel, like it was a crucifix.
While he was dancing, he was holding it like this.
But, you know, it's a very small little gold thing, and you're covering it with your fingers.
So I just see someone going like this with a chain, like he's rich.
Are you showing me that you've got a gold chain that's bigger than mine?
What the fuck?
So, yeah, the white kid was doing it on his behalf.
My God.
This is the second time this happened.
Another time was at a bar near my house, and this British guy comes over to say, my friend over there playing pool is Jewish, and he says he feels unsafe with you here.
I told you the story a million times.
And I said, that's the most pussy thing I've ever heard in my life.
And then the other guy goes, no, it isn't.
And I said, yes, it is.
And he goes, no, it isn't.
And we did, no, it isn't.
Yes, it is, approximately 12 times as adult males.
So anyway, I keep yelling at them.
And they go, so you're not a white supremacist?
The fuck?
I go, no.
And that's a fucking insulting thing to say.
My new thing is to be called a Nazi is like calling a black person the N-word.
You know, these were bad guys and you're calling me that.
So fuck you.
You're going to call me, find the Andrew Breitbart thing.
Oh, of course.
Do it.
War.
So I'm screaming at them and not screaming, but I'm yelling and pointing and they're getting scared.
And I was just like, I think I could take both of you.
Let's fucking fight.
I will kick your ass any day of the week.
And I probably couldn't, actually.
But you know who I'm really mad at now?
Now that it's been like 24 hours?
That Jewish kid's father.
That Jewish kid's father has convinced him he's a victim.
He's in probably the most successful demographic in America, up there with Asians as far as GDP, wealth, whatever.
And his father has got it in his head that there's anti-Semites everywhere and he's a victim and he should be proud of his Judaism.
Like that's some sort of a controversial thing.
Like him wearing, you want to know what's controversial?
To have a shirt that says it's okay to be white.
That's white supremacy in 2020.
To not be ashamed.
To say all lives matter is white supremacy.
So to say that you can live, that you should be allowed to live and that it's okay for you to exist, that's racist.
So your little Jewish thing, it's like the fucking brackets, which drives me nuts.
When people on Twitter will have four brackets on either side to say, yeah, I'm Jewish.
I don't give a fuck if you got a problem with that.
This is a world where being black and gay is like being magic.
You're hired anywhere you go.
Laverne Cox is like on the cover of every magazine.
I just saw her doing a commercial where she's dancing around, proud to be a beautiful woman with her mutilated vagina.
We'll get, well, what was that?
2-7.
Like, this is what it's like to be black and gay in America.
I know you want to show off your gag-worthy, denim-on-denim look.
But right now, don't do it from your phone.
By the way, when I saw that commercial out of the corner of my eye, it was just at the boots part.
And I was like, oh, fuck.
This is cool to see.
You don't see that this much very often.
It's women Who are proud to be women?
They're proud to be sexy.
And then, of course, I look up and it's a goddamn dude.
The only time women can be sexy and confident in today's America is when they've been brutally surgically altered.
Men.
It's powerfully mentally ill gays.
It's your intuitive surgery thing.
Like, imagine you knew this gay dude who was like, hi, I'm a lady, and kept cutting himself.
You'd go like, whoa, that dude is loco.
Would you do intuitive genital surgery?
Reassignment?
Yes.
What would you do?
Well, I'd YouTube it.
I would just have the YouTube on and then just keep pausing.
Like, play pause.
Yeah.
Oh, I see the tutorial.
Yeah.
My brother and I built a teepee once and we bought it as a kit.
It cost like three grand.
It had all the wood and everything.
Those things are supposed to be like this.
They're called the ninth wonder of the world or something because they're so incredible and well designed.
Dude, setting up one of those, a real bona fide one that's like 50 feet tall, a real deal one, is so hard that we had a DVD player and it was like, play pause.
Play pause.
Like, okay, first you set up your sticks in this.
Okay.
Play pause.
Play pause.
We could only do increments of like three seconds.
Oh, like, there's a bunch of fat women doing it.
I guess I'm retarded.
No, there's a man telling them what to do, of course.
Anywho's.
Yeah, actually, just look up.
Go to 228.
So you see a guy's cutting his arms and shit.
What if this gay person was doing this instead of cutting his arms?
Go down?
You'd be traumatized.
I don't want to watch this anymore.
You'd start crying.
You'd call his parents and say, what can I do?
That's Laverne Cox.
Okay?
So we're not living in an era of extreme prejudice.
The opposite is true.
To a fault.
To a fault.
We are encouraging gays to genitally mutilate themselves.
So your little fucking chain is not blowing any minds.
Did you see, by the way, J.K. Rowling is saying, what's up with all this trans shit?
That's 2-9?
Okay, I had that picture there, but there we go.
No.
Did I say 2-9?
Oh, shit.
I got the wrong fucking one.
Anyway, J.K. Rowling tweeted out that this trans stuff.
Look this up.
You gotta see this.
Yeah, normally I would skip over it, but she's saying, this is starting to look like grooming.
What did she say?
Okay, that's it.
Yeah, you just had it, dude.
That was it?
Trans culture.
Turn it up.
Blow it up.
Trans culture is seeing the beloved author of your generation like a transphobic tweet from a troll account, which has repeatedly called you a man.
Okay, that's not good enough.
Oh, here we go.
J.K. Rowling.
Dress however you please.
Call yourself whatever you'd like.
Sleep with any consenting adult who will have you.
Live your best life with peace and security, but force women out of their jobs for stating that sex is real.
I stand with Maya, blah, blah.
Oh, she said, she said a bunch of stuff.
That's right.
Yeah, but this is new.
So she's always said that, that people shouldn't be fired and there's only two genders.
That got her in a lot of shit.
But more recently, she said, oh, here it is.
July 5th, right?
Here we go.
Yeah, July 5th.
She goes, many health professionals are concerned that young people struggling with their mental health are being shunted towards hormones and surgery when this may not be in their best interest.
How many times have I said that?
Isn't it weird that I'm radical far-right who's banned everywhere?
And I say things like that.
Totally normal shit that every liberal in 2004 repeated.
Show that video of my NYU talk.
I have mediocre, bland politics that basically says things like that your dad says there's two genders of trans people are mentally ill.
So just this is us going to see, this is us walking to my talk.
Skip ahead.
Yeah, we were singing proud of your boy.
And then we get to the NYU, and you'd think I was like no KKK, no fascist USA.
That's what the mob is screaming at me when I'm going to do a talk, which was basically just this show.
Anyway, many, myself included, believe, this is the crucial one.
Ready?
Many, myself included, believe we are watching a new kind of conversion therapy for young gay people who are being set on a lifelong path of medicalization that may result in the loss of their fertility and or full sexual function.
2010, I said that.
I said, wait till you're 18, just like a tattoo.
Wait till you're 18, put on some red leather short shorts, go to the West Village and dance around a little bit.
I'm guessing you're going to be satisfied.
You don't have to fucking chop your dick off.
And the young lesbians, you don't need to remove your tits, okay?
That's what they do in the Middle East.
In Iran, they want to show that there's no gays.
So you know how they do that?
They surgically alter the gays.
And now, it's not a lesbian, it's a straight dude.
But, okay, now you can show that picture from the pictures.
Look at this.
June Birch.
J.K. Rowling needs to be quiet immediately.
She's literally harming the trans community.
She apparently just posted the clinic I went to as a child and said that they are experimenting on us when, in fact, Tavistock Clinic saved my life.
So J.K. Rowling was mocking this clinic and saying it damages people.
Look at the guy saying, leave that alone.
That clinic saved me.
It doesn't harm people.
Look how sane I am.
I'm blue.
Holy.
Possibly ain't that straight.
All right.
We still have a lot of shit to get to.
A lot of racial shit this year.
Shall we jump to so the easy for Prez.
That's new.
I'm going to have to start cutting stuff out.
I like what Roger Stone had to say about it.
What did he say?
You didn't see that?
Oh, it's on very cool.
It was on Instagram.
Via Culture with three T's.
He said, I like Kanye West.
I like his music a lot.
I don't know how much he looked into what it takes to be the president to get the amount of votes necessary.
I think the time has passed for that.
I will be voting for Trump.
I could just let him say it, but I think he's running for 2024.
He originally said 2020, but I think it would be in his best interest to do 2024, frankly.
This is Roger Stone.
So I read tonight online that Kanye West is running for president.
I really like Kanye West.
I like his rejection of identity politics.
I like his devotion to Jesus Christ.
I like his strength and his independence.
And I admire his wife's efforts to bring real change and reform to our criminal justice system.
I also like his music.
His album, Jesus is King, blew me away.
I think Sayla.
Yeah, but basically, I wrapped it up.
Basically, he said that it's too late to run as an independent right now.
Well, go to that TMZ link because they say 2024.
Okay.
I want to have to run for president 2024.
I'll walk with new name.
I think people just misunderstood it.
This was 2019.
This was November 8th, 2019.
So he's changing his mind now?
The Dems, all of their eggs are in the black basket.
If anything happens to the black vote, they lose.
And that's what's happening.
So I don't, this is great for us either way because he'll siphon black votes away from Trump a little bit, but definitely away from the Dems.
Trump doesn't really, he's not exactly drowning in black votes.
So the Dems need that.
The right doesn't.
All right.
We got to jump ahead here.
Check out this CNN talking about Mount Rushmore.
Fake news is in overdrive now.
Conservatives are getting banned, censored in droves.
And then the fake news is going so radical left.
Corporations are woke.
Antifa's on the move.
BLM is everywhere.
So it's either you stay radical left or you're a Nazi and you have to be banned.
That's where we're at.
And it's essentially election meddling.
This weird video, by the way, shows the logo for like 10 seconds.
Okay, turn it up.
Look at this.
I can read.
Independence Day weekend, President Trump will be at Mount Rushmore, where he'll be standing in front of a monument of two slave owners and on land wrestled away from Native Americans told that to quote, tear down our country's history.
Visiting Mount Rushmore today, Bernie Sanders taking in the majesty of the moment.
This monument to four great American presidents.
Just the accomplishment and the beauty.
It really does make one very proud to be an American.
No!
No!
I watched Custer's Last Stand, Battle of whatever it's called, White Plains?
No.
Documentary last night with the Misses.
And it was when Andrew Jackson had said, look, either become Americans or you're foreigners on our territory and we're going to hunt and kill you.
And my wife is obviously not a fan of that, the squaw.
But I was like, what are we supposed to do?
This is obviously not what we watched, but I go, what are you supposed to do?
Like, do they get passports?
And then she goes, well, you had the same thing with the Scots and the English.
And I go, yeah, that's what I'm screaming.
We fought the English for hundreds of, basically our entire existence.
And very recently, we lost.
I think it was 1792, where we said, all right, I guess we're part of England now.
And we have my passport says Great Britain on it.
England owns us.
Well, England is just a province.
Great Britain owns Scotland.
Scotland is a state, just like Texas.
So Great Britain has provinces, the province of Scotland, the province of Wales, the province of England, and the province of Northern Ireland.
We lost.
Sorry.
Now, if the Scots still were doing the braveheart shit and said, we'll never give in to England, then they would have been stabbed by the English the same way Andrew Jackson stabbed people.
Except, of course, Custer's last stand, where the Indians kicked our buns.
Anyway.
Okay, you got to see this.
Let's go on an Antifa bender.
1-8, I saw this article came out.
So Michelle Malkin and Milo put out a reading list.
These are books.
Books.
Books.
Excuse me.
Do you see this book?
Merchants of Truth.
It's one of the shittiest, stupidest books I've ever read.
Jill Abramson, the previous executive editor of the New York Times, wrote this.
It's a pack of lies.
It lies about me, a million bullshit stories about vice, calling everyone a white Supremacist.
This is fucking garbage.
What's it called?
Merchants of Truth.
What are you doing?
You don't remember that?
Sultans of Swing?
We are the merchants of truth.
God, your musical taste is like my mom's worst days.
That was a bit that we did.
Every time you said it, we played that.
So, but I think you should read that book.
It's fascinating that someone could be so illiterate and terrible at journalism and have been the executive editor at the New York Times.
So that's a good book to read.
You should read Mein Kampf.
You should read a collection of Shea Guevara's speeches.
You should read the Gulag Archipelago.
So anyway, this list, what do they say?
About real world violence.
So I read the whole terrible shit article, by the way, written under a pseudonym because he's too scared to own his words in case the real world violence comes to his front door.
Shows people with guns.
Anyway, that's not his name, Joseph Keating.
That's a fake name.
No, I think that's just a picture.
So it goes on and on and on and on.
He writes like a woman.
And the only thing I could find that leads to real world violence was, like many contemporary reactionaries, Kaczynski despises political correctness.
So if you despise political correctness, then you're Ted Kaczynski and you want to murder people.
Which he says has a stronghold among university professors.
That's a fact.
Not coincidentally, it is university professors who were the most frequent targets of Kaczynski's mailbombs.
Yeah.
You should still read his book.
So what is the left doing?
They're book burning.
What did they do when they kicked me off YouTube?
They burned my library.
And this is not anarchist.
This is not rebellious.
This is Maoist.
This is communist.
Look at this 1.9.
No, that's before that.
Yeah.
All ideas contrary to Mao's thinking and the objects that represented them had to be destroyed.
Not just Confucianism and Buddhism, but even more so foreign faiths like Christianity.
Throughout the country, churches were closed, clergy unfuncted, religious symbols smashed.
The statue of the Virgin Mary was replaced by a portrait of Marco.
One form of worship gave way to another.
This Lenin statue is still up in Seattle, by the way.
The physical destruction wrought by the Red Guards was unparalleled even in China's long history.
Monasteries all over the country, as far away as distant Tibet, were ransomed Lennon and ON or Lenin.
Why the fuck would they have a Lenin?
Would I give a shit about a John Lennon statue?
clearly mean the communist.
80 million people died in the Great League Joe.
God has a plan for this.
If you fuck your brother, you will create a retarded child.
If you play God like communism, then millions of people die.
God doesn't want you to play God.
He wants you to be as free as possible.
That's what nature is.
That was God's plan.
Freedom.
When you go against God, people die.
And communism is playing God.
I'll decide who gets the food.
No.
When you do that, people starve.
Look at this, speaking of this bullshit.
So that St. Louis couple, right, that defended their home, we know, the gate was like this, right?
Folded.
An iron gate folded down.
They were there to destroy this home, this home that is a historical landmark that they have been, they rebuilt.
Basically, it was totally abandoned, filthy, and they rebuilt it from scratch, saving everything, and brought it to its original glory.
Those guys wanted to destroy it because they're fucking spoiled brats who are jealous and have never built anything themselves, and they just don't like wealth.
The couple that they were attacking are Dems.
They donated to Hillary.
They were defending a victim.
Right now, one of their cases is defending a victim of police brutality.
So it's not about ideology.
It's just vain, bitter jealousy.
And so those people defended their home.
They didn't shoot anyone.
They didn't hurt a soul.
They just said, I have a problem with you destroying my house, destroying my property.
But as we learned from the Covington Catholic school kids, to stand your ground is aggressive.
So everyone's pissed at those two for not letting them have a temper tantrum.
So this was a protest against them.
Can you fucking believe this?
Black Lives Matter.
And by Black Lives Matter, I mean, I get to vandalize your home.
Black Lives Matter!
Black Lives Matter!
Someone who was blind trained to hold a weapon, point a weapon, and then it's for people, setting up a dozen times.
Black Lives Matter!
What?
Hey, can I destroy your house?
No.
But Black Lives Matter.
Okay.
I'm defending a black guy right now.
Yeah, but can I rip down all the paintings in your house?
What?
No.
Well, Black Lives Matter.
I know.
I don't understand these two.
Well, yeah, I did, but you were coming to destroy my shit.
I wouldn't have touched you if you didn't do anything.
I didn't do anything, because you guys left.
Yeah, but you don't understand.
Black people are being killed by police.
Yeah, I think that's terrible.
That's why I'm working to defend this, my client.
Yeah, but fuck it.
Can I just throw red paint on your stairs?
What?
What?
Aren't you Embarrassed?
This is one of the most.
We are living in one of the most embarrassing times in history.
The most ridiculous, like, how embarrassing and low IQ is that?
Two innocent black people, two innocent unarmed black men were killed last year.
Every other case, they're attacking police.
Philando Castile, you've got a point.
That's one guy.
Trayvon Martin was beating the shit out of a Hispanic man named George Zimmerman.
Mike Brown went for a cop's gun.
And what happened after that?
Ferguson riots.
And now what do you have?
What Heather McDonald calls the Ferguson effect, where cops go, I don't want to lose my pension.
And we have unprecedented shootings.
Jesus, this weekend in New York was a record breaker.
What's the cover of the New York Post?
Look up New York Post cover today.
Okay.
49 hit, 8 dead in NYC.
Whoa.
Really?
You told us, you called us pigs.
You said no cops.
You want a police-free New York?
The fucking mayor's wife, that ugly little gremlin, was saying she dreams of a New York that could be cop-free.
All right, you got it.
What do you think?
Eight dead.
That's every few hours.
And our hospitals are incredible with very talented surgeons.
So the reason that that 104 shot only went to eight dead is because of the incredible work of our triage medicine.
10 years ago, 20 years ago, pre-Iraq and Afghanistan, that would have been 50 dead.
Okay, now to the fun part.
Seattle crash.
So these girls, our daughters, are being destroyed.
Imagine a world where we took away a woman's maternal instincts and said, don't get married, don't have kids, just be a fucking slut.
And then at the same time, we brought in a bunch of Somali pirate sons and said, go fuck all those dumb bitches.
Like you'd go, well, that's a sadist.
That's an incredibly evil person.
That's our culture right now.
That's what we're living in.
So what's the first thing?
Oh, wait, wait, wait.
This one.
Okay.
This isn't the Seattle crash, but this is what I'm talking about.
So what do we do to our daughters?
We throw them in front of moving vehicles.
We throw them in front of cars.
Get out of the kitchen and get on the highway.
And then they try to get hit by cars to become martyrs.
Look at this girl.
She wants to be Heather Heyer so bad.
A man trying to run over protesters, so I ran over, and he was running them over, and then he...
...thugged me...
There's something else playing.
Oh, that's annoying.
All right.
Okay, go back.
Trying to fuck run over protesters.
Trying to run over protesters.
So I ran over and he was running them over.
And then he got me.
I ended up falling over to the side after he hit me.
Oh no, he hit you, did he?
Okay, let's see.
That's her with the pink.
Standing in front of a car, a deadly vehicle, jumping on the hood.
They're smashing at his car, pulling on the side mirror there.
And then eventually she just gets out of the way.
They start hitting the car.
That's her there.
So she's lying.
But she wanted to be hit by a car.
She tried to get hit by a car.
What have we done to our daughters?
Okay, now we get to the real one.
So one girl is in intensive care, and the other's dead.
Heavy is...
And now it's like the best spot to go for breaking news.
Better than CNN.
So this is who we invite to come fuck our daughters.
We have, get out of Somalia, the disgusting shithole.
And let's bring them all here and then say, go fuck our girls.
And then this girl, rest in power, I hate when they say that.
This girl is standing on a highway.
By the way, they were on this, this demonstration was at 1 a.m. on the fucking highway, and it was for black women.
More specifically, black femmes.
I guess they don't like to say women.
And here's the footage of it.
Oh, wait, just pause.
We're about to watch someone die.
So if there's kids in the room or something, maybe get them out of the room now.
Look.
Oh my God.
Can you believe that shit?
Damn.
Now, the way that this is being reported is like a pro-sanctioned protest, and he went around the boundary.
I don't know.
Like the car, there were some cars there that they stuck there, but this...
And what are you doing?
Look, they're all hugging and ignoring the danger.
We have them all brainwashed into thinking this does something.
Like, the fathers here should be ashamed.
Just like that Jewish kid's dad.
Look at her.
And another cop is like, they're roughing him up.
She just called chop pork chop.
The footage you just saw of that Asian girl was being filmed by this guy, Diaz, woman, Diaz Love or something.
And she live streamed it.
She's distracted live streaming.
And this is her footage here.
So she has a two-hour live stream.
The car is speeding towards them.
She doesn't really pay attention because she's too busy doing it for the grand, getting this on Facebook.
And that's her filming her own death.
Not death, sorry, she's alive.
So go back.
We already saw that one.
But this is her.
Can you turn it up?
more back.
I'll die.
Okay.
And what was this for?
This was for social media.
This was for social justice points.
Oh, is this afterwards?
9-1-1.
Oh, my God.
Oh, I'm so glad the video wasn't running.
Oh, my God.
I got to get this on my Facebook.
Yeah.
I got to get these bodies.
This is going to get a lot of likes.
9-1-1's not answering.
Yo, there's a police car right there.
And the police didn't even do anything.
Like you wanted them to not.
At our defund the police rally.
Police.
He's right there.
Tell him to come.
Get the planes and bail.
Get the fuck out of the car.
I saw one tweet where someone said, let him go free.
It's what she would have wanted.
Oh, my God.
How's that for it?
I talk about ethnomasochism.
Now we're at ethnic genocide.
6-9-6-1.
Ethnic genocide.
Get the fuck out of the car.
By the way, we have an entrance to Stonehill.
When I was talking about fake news, we forgot the one below 1-7.
Bloomberg News is now rights like Antifa.
So they were talking about Mount Rushmore the same way.
But check out this fucking headline.
Eight years after the Civil Rights Act was signed, the world's largest monument to white supremacy was completed.
What?
Here's why Georgia's Stone Mountain still stands in the face of efforts to eradicate Confederate symbols across the nation?
Kevin Davis, Robert
E. Lee and Stonewall Jackson on Georgia's Stone Mountain oh yeah sorry I was thinking of Mount Rushmore the world's largest monument to white supremacy sorry guys that's my mistake I thought they were talking about Mount Rushmore yeah it happened it's in history all right that was a waste of our time sorry embarrassing uh here's footage of someone chasing the dude the Somali pirate who killed our daughter 22 right yeah by the way if you're that woman's father that Antifa
chick's father i hope you have nightmares and i hope that you understand that you are to blame for this you let your daughter get corrupted and brainwashed you're responsible oh yeah here's footage of the guy doing it all right that was sam hyde being tasteless for a change um
what a
maniacal person what i don't we don't have footage of the guy doing the car chase yeah two four some dude got in his no two four that's two three so it's a white jaguar oh they don't say that he's black by the way in the news the way they're spinning this they say a protester
protester uh hit by luxury vehicle it's a white car yeah it's a rich white car drives in front of him and then slows down and thinks he's going to apprehend him so the guy just goes what goes around we've destroyed our
daughters we're killing our daughters it's like the way they treat their daughters in sweden let him get raped in order to virtue signal it's it's mandatory to go to those protests to my friend from la that was visiting she's like yeah we went to like every protest but you know like i don't really and she's like neutral you'd be yeah you'd be ostracized if you don't go to them okay we went to everyone but you know okay two three is just a final example of of us
corrupting our daughters we're not going to get to the mailbag today i'm afraid look at this shit protesters say you'll have to scroll down so i can read it protesters say tear gas caused them to get their period multiple times in a month like they're dying to be heather higher literally and if i didn't get hit by a car well then uh it's hurting my period then stop rioting all right let's this is one of my favorite things
um this new group called nfac and they're the not fucking around coalition and what they do is they believe all this bullshit propaganda that proud boys three percenters they're all out on the streets killing blacks right so their shit is we're not gonna let this happen anymore so they show up armed ready to shoot the nazis who are there to kill them and
they say let's just have the boogaloo boogaloo is a joke by the way it's a troll it's a silly thing the boogaloo boys the boogaloo boys are boogeymen you are there to fight the easter bunny and you know what they do when they get there they go you pussies you're not even showing up uh yeah proud boys aren't showing up to have a shootout with you because that's not what we're about dumbass look at this don't mean shit to us y'all been threatening us
since birmingham i ain't seen shit when it's july the 4th and all you scary ass negroes that passed that shit around look at what the fuck you did you made blacks come out i don't see no white militia so to the boogie boys the three percenters and all the rest of you scared ass rednecks we here where the fuck you at we in your house let's go nfac motherfucker oh my god you know how i
confuse stone mountain and mount rushmore yeah i think that's what they did i think think they knew that there was a bunch of three percenters going to protect mount rushmore for trump speech and they went to stone and they thought it was stone mountain i guarantee you dude i would bet i'd say there's a 74 chance that this is just confusing stone mountain rushmore so he made two dumb assumptions One, there's a Nazi militia waiting to kill black people.
And two, they're at Stone Mountain, not Mount Rushmore.
My God.
I was embarrassed about that Bloomberg mistake, but now it ended up being relevant.
Yeah, you're not rounding up 100 people.
Just a clip.
I don't have 500 armed people for my typo.
But they should have showed up and went, wait, there is no renting militia?
Doy.
But instead, they're like, you might as well go under your bed with a gun and go, oh, look who's not here now.
Now that I'm armed, the boogeyman isn't under my bed anymore.
Pussy, hey, boogeyman, what the fuck?
You chickened out again.
And I bet when I put this gun away, all of a sudden you're going to magically appear under my bed again.
He just lies in bed with the gun and just goes, I shot the boogeyman.
But let's hear what he has to say.
His name is Grandmaster J, not that dissimilar from Grandmaster Flash, the man who invented rap, or at least was its first pioneer.
And then become the backbone, become the backbone for the military.
This is what the authorities at DNC, the media, are accusing the Proud Boys of.
They're a militia that's going to get people killed.
I'm kicked off YouTube because I said Proud Boys are going to chaz.
That's very dangerous.
But when it's black, everyone is like, uh-huh, mm-hmm.
Because of the bigotry of low expectations.
They see blacks as retarded and they go, oh, you have a militia.
Okay, I'm sure you do.
When they have these Muslim training camps like Islamberg and the place in New Mexico where the kid died, they go, oh, a training camp.
Okay, you have your training camp.
If it was a fucking Confederate flag training camp, oh my God, the FBI would be there this afternoon.
But blacks, go ahead.
Black nation.
What is the solution to all of this in Europe?
The solution is very simple.
We file a declaration of liberation, declaring every African American descendant of slavery a political prisoner here in the United States that was affected by the Portuguese slave trade.
And then after that, the United States has a choice.
Either, hey, carve us a piece of land out here.
We'll take Texas and let us do our own thing.
Or don't stop us when we exodus out of here and go somewhere where they will give us our own land to build our own nation.
What is your name?
Okay.
Go nuts.
Yeah, nobody's stopping you from leaving.
Yeah.
Go build, just buy all the land you can afford in Texas.
Build a compound.
By the way, you know how many black people want to go to your utopia?
I would guess if you really market it well, maybe a thousand.
That's a big, yeah, that's a big number.
But no, Hascidic communities all over upstate New York, like Curious St. Joel.
Just Curious Joel, yeah.
Curious Joel.
Yeah, St. Joel.
What the fuck?
It's Catholic Jews.
Yeah.
They built their community.
They have all kinds of tax benefits, all kinds of shit.
Go nuts.
They're their own country.
Perfectly legal.
They have their own language, their own culture, their own schools.
They don't go to the public schools.
They work with other Hasids.
You got to get less familiar with guns and more familiar with a lot of paperwork.
A lot of paperwork.
Who's tarring the roads?
Nas would say that.
He has some song where he's like, we got to go get...
I think they watch TV too much, and they think they're 50% of the population.
Now you take out all the black Hispanics.
You take out all the mixed couples.
You take out all the people that have no fucking interest in your radical black politics, which is probably 90% of blacks.
And you're left with a bunch of radicals.
And this happened in the 60s when everyone was far more radical.
And they went and started Liberia.
They went back to Africa and they started Liberia.
And guess what?
It's a shithole.
It tanked.
This is kind of a racist sentiment to think that all blacks want the same thing.
There are affluent blacks.
There are people that want nothing to do with the culture design of blacks.
Interview every black person in America and 1,000 out of however many millions there are would go, yeah, I'm into it.
Let's do it.
And then what's your job?
Like, what if there's going to be disproportionate numbers of certain trades, like truckers?
We'll have like way too many truckers.
And then not, I'm guessing maybe not a lot of neurosurgeons.
I'm guessing.
Farmers, janitors, plumbers, that's a lot of people.
More bigotry of low expectations.
Look at this.
Look at this example of pure racism that will never make the papers one five.
Like the America we hear about is an America where some white dude just jumps out of a car and just punches some black dude just because he's black and he's getting on his nerves.
Like Chris Delia, that stand-up routine where he goes, I was at the gym, there's this white, pasty white guy there who had like blonde hair.
And just describing a white person, all these racist, anti-white whites are just like.
So that's the racism in this country.
It's not that bad, but it exists.
This kid's 14, by the way.
He's participating in black culture, by the way.
His name's Ethan, but he calls himself E-Man, trying to appease the blacks.
Look at this.
There would be riots on the fucking streets if these races were reversed.
A grown-ass man hitting a fucking child.
He just socks.
nice I'm going to start listening to Country.
Yeah, fuck.
He's on his way to the record store to buy Toby Keith.
I'm selling my Jordans for some.
So he got a concussion and then started with a severe nosebleed.
Damn.
That story will die.
You'll never hear that again anywhere.
All right, it feels weird not to do.
Oh, wait, wait, wait.
I forgot I sent you a bunch of pictures, too.
We'll do that another day.
All right, let's just do one or two letters.
We need our routine.
Yeah, we gotta get the mail.
Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dad.
Let's turn our eyes together.
Let me touch it.
I understand that.
Let me touch it.
Sound a little bit the new totals from this Justice for Liberty site is getting on my nerves because because we have hacked, we have to manually update all the donations.
But these guys are busy and they're blue-collar and they're like taking days.
So I think we're at a much higher number than what's up there now.
yeah it's not 9 16.
The first one we got is just a video.
You want to play that while you...
Okay.
Uh, ba-ba-do-ba-do.
Uh, ba-ba-do.
This is from Scott.
2x4 sword fight in Toronto.
Oh, this is ancient.
Oh, yeah.
Who hasn't seen this a million times?
And nothing happens, so you know.
And nothing happens.
So that's a waste of time.
This is from Bill.
I have a good suggestion for your next family vacation.
It is in Illinois, and most people wouldn't know it's there, but we have canyons and waterfalls about an hour and a half from Chicago.
It's 13 miles of trails, and once you get in there, there's no handrails, and you're walking along a canyon, cliff, and mountain.
It's called Starved Rock.
Check out the pictures of it and the waterfalls.
Got it.
That sounds fun.
Yummy.
That's beautiful.
Looks like Catterskill Falls.
Looks exactly like Catterskill Falls.
I wonder if you could camp there.
Thank you for that tip, sir.
That's very helpful.
Whoa.
What?
Oh, that's cool.
It's in the winter time.
My wife wants to go on a cross-country road trip.
Ooh, that's fun.
On an RV.
But how would we do this show?
We could do it on the road.
Yeah, but we'd have to find an upload every single day.
And I'd have to hang out with you for months.
We could have a buffer.
We could have a buffer, like a couple of episodes that we could run while we're...
We could shoot a bunch of watching movies, and those could be on the Mondays.
So then we just have Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday.
Sure.
Wednesday.
By the way, we're switching the live show.
Competing with Steven Crowder is not good for either of us.
So Wednesday is a new live show.
This Wednesday, 9 p.m., then Thursday will be a normal show.
Oh.
You got it?
Wednesday.
Did you know that?
No.
I also have a big announcement to make about a new addition, but I can't tell you.
So Wednesdays, okay.
I'll tell you tomorrow, okay?
Hey, G-Man.
What?
You weren't finished with the RV thing, though.
No, I basically am.
Oh.
If he wants to do that, like, I don't know when.
We could even live stream and then tons of weeks.
So say we do a bunch of Mondays, like we just go on a movie bender.
So those are our Mondays gone.
Wednesday, we don't have to think about anything because it's live.
Right?
That's just the camera.
We have to be near a pretty good connection.
And so that's just two episodes a week.
Yeah.
They're fucking expensive, RVs.
Yeah, they are.
I thought that'll be a fun thing to do, just to have.
And I looked up really nice ones.
Quarter mil.
Are you looking to buy?
Well, renting is ridiculous, too.
But yeah, I'm not looking to buy anymore.
A quarter of a million dollars?
Jesus Christ.
This is from Keith, AG Man and Ryan, quote, Fagzone Rivera.
I think that's a good idea for a middle name for you.
I don't think so.
Ryan Fagzone Rivera.
It sounds cooler than Katsu.
Ryan Fagzone Rivera.
Not a lot.
Ryan Fagzone Rivera.
I don't like it.
Ryan Fagzone Rivera.
I don't like it.
Bam.
Ryan Fagzone Rivera.
Sure you don't have to do that.
Ryan danced to Rivera.
I got to get Erika Badu and that white dude together.
Ryan Fagzone Rivera.
Ryan Fagzone Rivera.
Sure, it's got a ring to it, but I don't want that to be my name.
Well, lots of people don't like their names, dude.
I don't want a song name.
I swear President Trump is subscribed to Censor.tv.
Here are a few samples from President Trump's Mount Rushmore speech.
Shit, we didn't even cover that.
I watched it.
Our nation is witnessing a merciless campaign to wipe out our history.
He put that in bold because he says Trump got it from us.
Defame our heroes, erase our values, and indoctrinate our children.
Angry mobs are trying to tear down statues of our founders, deface our most sacred memorials, and unleash a wave of violent crime in our cities.
Isn't it funny how CNN and the media talked about his hateful speech?
And all he was doing is criticizing the radicals.
That's hate now.
You get harassed by lifeguards if you don't comply with the radical left.
Oh, I forgot to tell you this part of the beach story.
So the owner, the guy who runs it, comes over to me.
He goes, that was fucking ridiculous.
You want me to fire him?
I said, no.
Oh, wow.
And he said, okay, I'm going to suspend him.
And he said, but if anyone fucks with you at this beach, tell me and I'll revoke their membership.
Oh, snap.
Now I'm walking around with a Nazi uniform, goose stepping up and coming.
Hey, yeah, that's a bit rich.
What'd you say?
I'm sorry?
What's your name?
Edith Prickley?
One of their political weapons is, this is still quoting Trump, quoting us.
Quoting Trump, quoting us.
Aha.
Quoting me, quoting you.
Just go back to his daughters.
South Dakota Army and second.
Say what?
Go back to the family there we just saw sitting down.
I would wish each and every one of you.
I like the ugly.
I'm more attracted to the ugly one than Ivanka.
What do you think of that?
That's pretty controversial.
That's a crowd shot.
Those aren't all his kids.
Oh.
One of their political weapons is, quote unquote, cancel culture.
Driving people from their jobs, shaming dissenters, and demanding total submission for anyone who disagrees.
This is a very definition of totalitarianism.
I noticed he had a bit of trouble with the word totalitarianism.
Yeah, I want the one in the white dress.
Oh.
What do you think of that?
More than Melania.
What's her name again?
Sex appeal is a weird thing.
Like Lady Gaga, beautiful woman, very successful, very talented.
Down here, Zilch.
Yeah, her.
Not attractive.
Funny looking.
Schwing.
I can't explain it.
A little goofy, but.
Goofy, chubby cheeks.
She's more sexually attractive than Ivanka Trump, who is much prettier.
Ivanka Trump a little bit of sex appeal.
She looks like Korean.
But Katy Perry and Lady Gaga.
This guy, not interested.
And I'm as confused as you.
In our schools, in our newsrooms, in our corporate bedrooms, there is a new far-left fascism.
Or here's another quote he said that he stole from us.
Against every law of society nature, our children are taught in school to hate their own country.
Donald, I need a shout-out.
Release the proud boys from prison.
By the way, everyone says he can't do that because they're in a state jail and you can only pardon someone federally.
He's the fucking president, you moron.
We went to Nicaragua.
No one wanted that war.
Have you seen the amount of wars?
We're in Lebanon with nobody's permission.
You can bomb whatever the fuck you want when you're the president.
You can release whoever you want from prison.
No, that's a state.
Shut the fuck up.
He could kill people.
He could kill you.
No, you're not supposed to do that.
Yeah, I know.
The radical ideology attacking our country advances under the banner of social justice.
Senator Mike Brown.
Thank you, Mike.
Pretty interesting.
I hope he's paying.
You know what a lot of people say to me, especially kids, like older kids, like teen, friends of my daughter and my son, how come you haven't met Trump?
And I go, yeah, that's fucked up, right?
They go, yeah, I thought you would have met him by now.
Yeah, I'm pissed.
Imagine.
Imagine you were mainstream.
I don't want what Carpe Donctum had, where you just go in and you smile.
I want to have chips.
Like the Charlie Kirk probably gets.
Yeah.
Like I want to have my feet up on his coffee table in the Oval Office and go, are you a tit guy?
You're an ass guy, right?
I want him to fart in front of me and be like, sorry.
Oh, boy.
That one burned my anal lips.
And I go, and then I would say, you can always tell when they're going to reek by the heat.
If it burns your anal lips, that one's a stinker.
That one was like 300 degrees.
That one, I feel like I have to put an ice cube up my ass.
I'd go to the rose garden if I were you.
You may want to take a break.
No, thank you, sir.
I'm actually enjoying your fart.
It melted my potato chip, but look at that.
Ow!
My potato chips burst into flames.
That's hilarious.
I want to be like an old office in his bar fridge.
You drink that stupid Zambuka shit?
It smells like foreskins.
That's from Milani.
I've never touched it.
I don't go in that fridge.
You don't want to show this shit?
Sure, you can show your little drawing.
It's not mine.
It's Brian John Spencer, the one who's responsible for creating our other one and that very mug on your desk.
Yep.
He made another one.
We should make a t-shirt of that, right?
Yeah, I want a hoodie of that, but this is perfect.
Get off my lawn, written sort of behind us in the original free speech font.
That would be a cool shirt.
Oh, I see, yeah.
And it's huge.
It's as big as a thing, so you can't really read it, but you'll figure it out, right?
Yeah.
Let's try that.
I had a design in mind for it, but that sounds pretty bad.
That's for a shirt?
Yeah.
Cool, cool.
Cool, cool.
All right, we're out of time.
We went way over today.
Way over.
But that's the fate of Mondays.
I'm also in a pool of sweat right now.
We're not way over.
We're not?
An hour 16.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Oh, shit.
Well, then we covered pretty much everything.
But let's look at the final videos.
This is Karen.
We're of two minds about Karen, by the way.
One, that we hate that they attack us and antagonize us and brainwash their children to accost us on the beach.
But we're also aware that it's very easy to shit on white people, white women.
There's no shaniquas.
There's no Mrs. Wongs.
It's white women.
So it's a racial epithet.
It is an N-word for white women.
But this N-word is fucking nuts.
Stop!
Look!
I can save you!
I can help you.
You are sick, and I can help you.
I can fix this.
I can save everybody!
No, no!
Let me save him!
Let me save him!
*laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter* *laughter*
That movie was ruined by CGI.
Why couldn't they just get skinny people?
Yeah.
Pay a bunch of s Hey, my boy, you're a racist!
What?
*laughs* *laughs* *laughs*
I think they're wearing a face mask.
I don't see it for myself or myself.
Of course, it has to be anti-Trump.
That movie was so fucking good.
And you ruined it with your cartoon monsters.
Get fired.
Get in trouble.
Be brave.
and never stop fighting.
*Dramatic music*
I'm a savage, had it too nasty.
Talk beat, but my bank account magic.
Good when I'm classic, rich when I'm raging.
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