Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - S02E180 - VENERATE THE GARBAGE [2020-06-29 - S02E180 - VENERATE THE GARBAGE]

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June 29, 2020 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

01:30:48

S02E180 - VENERATE THE GARBAGE [2020-06-29 - S02E180 - VENERATE THE GARBAGE]

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	you have nerve endings on your penis well i'm not gonna convert two lesbians that i don't know what you're gonna make out they're gonna i knew that david cross's sister they don't and her wife would use men as human dildos right they would just take them home use them and then say get out of here they don't even like cook up they don't know what they're doing they don't even show them get them wasted onto cues two shots listen to music and then have some crazy When did you last get laid?
	It's been a while.
	It's been a while.
	You've been in quarantine, pussy-free quarantine.
	I give you my gigantic home, tons of booze in a liquor cabinet.
	You could have been partying your ass off, coming up with new moves that would make my ears burn.
	I'd be clutching my pearls, clenching my Cuban links.
	And no, what movie did you watch?
	Fuck you.
	I just wanted some simple company, you see.
	But it wasn't so simple.
	was kind of a drag.
	God made them for threesomes.
	And you were like, I'm not interested in this.
	God literally made lesbians for threesomes.
	I'd rather go watch a shitty movie and listen to you complain.
	God literally would look down on their lifestyle of being lesbians.
	And then furthermore, premarital sex doesn't.
	He's not a big fan of that either.
	I don't know if you've read his book, The Bible.
	I think it was a bestseller.
	Yeah.
	What do you mean, nah?
	You can't just pick and choose what you like.
	wants you to enjoy life a little bit.
	No.
	You have two lesbians on the couch.
	And what movie did you get?
	Knives Out.
	Knives Out, which I believe is just like an improv thing where actors have fun.
	Is it?
	I mean, it seemed pretty structured.
	It almost seems like.
	All keep talking about how fun it was to shoot.
	It just looks like the drama club.
	Yeah, you know, I could see that where they're like, just your character's this just run.
	They're always talking about their craft.
	But it was pretty tight.
	So I can understand that when they're doing the interview session.
	I don't want to talk about that gay movie anymore.
	Well, disappointed.
	I'm disappointed in every movie you've ever watched.
	Like you're making fun of Milo the other day and you go, he looks like the food critic from Ratatouille.
	He certainly does.
	That was on my parlor.
	He was considering doing a despicable me reference, but he feels that those are overdone.
	He's got some Crocs on.
	Not wearing Crocs.
	And I think you have a Buzz Lightyear little.
	A gibbet?
	Yeah.
	So you're going to have a Buzz Lightyear pin gibbet in his Croc, folks.
	And I also have a white Croc Croc gibbet on my Crocs.
	Like we talk about how all the kids stay in the fall of man.
	Long gone.
	Ryan Katsu Rivera.
	He's going to say Ryan McGillie, who's a fag.
	Ryan Katsu Rivera.
	He has lesbians at his house, and he doesn't fuck them because he's buying Buzz Lightyear giblets for his fucking Crocs.
	And I'm not even exaggerating.
	That wasn't.
	That sounds like an insult.
	But that didn't link up.
	It wasn't like I couldn't because I just didn't want.
	That's not my prerogative.
	It's not my prerogative.
	So they were annoying.
	They were sitting in my basement, which is cool, obviously.
	It's a basement.
	Is there AC here?
	It's so hot.
	Before we even get there, they want to eat.
	So we go to this place, and I know the town that we're in.
	And they're like, let's just go that way, see what's there.
	I was like, there's nothing there.
	I know this place.
	They're pointing to a highway.
	Yeah, that has apartment buildings.
	Let's see what's over there.
	I was like, well, I'll tell you what's over there.
	Let's go to the apartments and start knocking on the doors and say, hey, can you have any food?
	Got any leftover mashed Bertatis?
	Yeah, you have salt and vinegar chips, maybe?
	So we're sitting at this place, nice atmosphere.
	They got lights up there.
	There's like, you know, music being played and stuff.
	It's a nice night.
	And it's so rare.
	Like, we went out to dinner on Saturday night and we were like, wow, we're out for dinner.
	Yeah.
	Felt nice to sit down and be waited on and like there's people around, not with masks on and stuff.
	It was like, this is a beautiful night.
	You know, it feels like almost like things are normal.
	And then the complaints start.
	You know, one of them's vegetarian.
	The other one doesn't.
	She's kind of pickish.
	And I was like, well, whatever you get, $10.
	You guys just give me $10.
	I'll buy the rest of it.
	And because usually it's like $15, $17.
	That's a good deal.
	And they have tons of vegetarian.
	And I know the owner there.
	And he says, like one time I asked him, I go, you know that chicken sandwich?
	Could you just put that in a salad?
	He goes, yeah, I'll do whatever you want.
	I don't care.
	If you see it on the menu, just make it.
	Warp it.
	Yeah, just make it a bit more.
	And their menu is what?
	It's like four full pages of stuff.
	Yeah.
	And they're like, I don't like it.
	Great everything.
	Great burgers, frankly.
	Great everything.
	And I know great everything.
	Okay.
	I've really started to pick up Trumpisms, not even trying.
	Great everything they have.
	And so I order an appetizer because they don't want anything.
	So you went up, they said, we're hungry.
	Let's go to eat.
	You go, okay.
	You take them to a place that has tons of stuff where they'll make whatever you want.
	It's kind of expensive.
	Buy anything over here.
	I'm going to cover it.
	And then they decide, I don't want to eat anything.
	Nothing there.
	There's nothing there on Dylan Roof at that point.
	I almost started.
	I would be worried about bullets going through them and hurting someone behind them.
	It was crazy.
	And then there's one mosquito bite.
	And then she's like, I'm getting bit by mosquitoes.
	Let's go.
	And then I was like, all right, let me just wait for my food.
	Can you take that to go?
	Okay, yeah, I won't sit here and enjoy my land water.
	Yeah.
	And so, you know what?
	I have to get up right now because I'm getting bit.
	So gets up, starts walking around.
	I'm like, you know, this is.
	No, I don't think it was a mosquito bite.
	I think it was a skill bite.
	I didn't get bit by a mosquito and I had shorts on.
	I bet it was one of those little bugs that sort of bothers you, those little fly things, the tiny, tiny ones that people just assume are mosquitoes, but they're not and they don't bite.
	You just go like that.
	I bet it was one of those.
	They were so finicky.
	So one mosquito bite, then we get out of there.
	Now we have to go get ice cream.
	So we go to get ice cream.
	So wait a minute, wait a minute.
	Before the food.
	But you're not hungry.
	They were, everybody's hungry.
	But this is four-page menu, not cotton it.
	No, but ice cream.
	So now they go, now we're hungry for ice cream.
	But didn't they say they want to get pizza?
	Yes, but let's get the ice cream first.
	That's infuriating.
	It sure is.
	It sure is.
	And so then, you know, the vegetarians like, you know, her girlfriend.
	So they go to the next town because all the ice cream places are now closed because it's past eight o'clock.
	It's past the time to eat ice cream, in my opinion.
	Sure.
	So we go there, and then that's kind of in the area where there's some pizza, right?
	Shitty pizza, though.
	You're in the hood now.
	Right.
	And so, you know, after the ice cream, what's it called?
	Oh, yeah, yeah.
	Now we're on the way to the pizza.
	I say, so, what are you going to get on your pizza?
	Knowing, you know, she's a vegetarian.
	She's like, oh, I'm not going to get pizza.
	I was like, okay, that leaves one of you.
	What are you going to get for a pizza?
	I haven't decided yet.
	I was like, so let me just make sure before we get there, you're going to eat an entire pizza because I have leftovers.
	They're just dominoes now.
	They only make they don't serve slices.
	They don't go by the slice.
	But we did walk to a pizza place where they could have gotten a slice, but declined.
	So now we're on the way to the so you're going to eat a whole pizza.
	You know what I would do?
	I would just walk away.
	I almost walked away.
	Even if I was driving, I would get out of the driver's side.
	Yeah, I almost did that.
	And just leave the car running with the door open and go get an Uber back home.
	Just fuck you.
	You got to get fired.
	Get in trouble.
	Be brave.
	Jump, just jump out of a car.
	This isn't working out.
	Bye.
	And then I say, let's just get Taco Bell.
	Folks, I've heard this story already.
	It gets worse.
	Oh, I'm not even starting.
	This is the appetizer.
	This is the appetizer.
	I have to take home.
	So my clamp.
	You're walking around with your appetizer in a box.
	It's fried clams.
	And what was it?
	It's clam.
	Clam strips.
	Really good, by the way.
	So they don't age very.
	They're really good when they're crispy and new.
	I don't know if you know that.
	When they're cold.
	They are the McDonald's fries of clams.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	And so we arrive at Taco Bell, and I say, this should be easy, right?
	There's nobody inside I could see in there, but there's about 17 cars not getting in the- Oh, yeah.
	Yeah.
	So you would go inside, order, and then take it to go.
	You can't eat inside.
	Correct.
	That is correct.
	And you could even just, you know, they got the plexiglass thing on the register.
	I've been there before.
	Or they got the machine.
	Quick and easy.
	I was like, all right, let's go in there.
	Like, I don't want to go in there.
	Let's just go through the drive-through.
	Why not?
	Looking at the machine, I'm like, why not?
	I don't know.
	There's a hundred cars every spot.
	Like, we couldn't actually start in the drive-through.
	We had to like queue up before the drive-through.
	On the road.
	Yeah.
	We're blocking the exit to get.
	And I'm like, it's not too late to turn back.
	And no.
	And so for 30 minutes, we're waiting in this hellacious line.
	And to get.
	I want you to know something.
	I hate them.
	And if I ever meet them, I'm going to say, I hate you.
	They were, yeah.
	And they were guests in your home.
	So, and then, so on the internet, whatever they were on.
	Not because of cooties, but because of shitty people germs.
	SPGs, yeah.
	So we wait for 30 minutes for one taco that I didn't even tell you this part, that she winds up not eating.
	Because you know why?
	Because when I unbox what I eat and she unbox what she eats, she says it smells too much like clams in here to eat it.
	Like it's grossing me out.
	So she doesn't eat it and I'm now eating my cold clams because she had to eat.
	How long did you wait for that stupid shitty burrito that she doesn't eat?
	I think it was like two hours for us going to the line at Taco Bell.
	How much was that?
	Like 30 minutes.
	Like 20 to 30 minutes.
	No exaggeration.
	You don't have a bullet hole in your head.
	And it didn't really get better after that.
	So the whole energy is kind of like this.
	Aren't they still hungry now?
	You would think.
	They haven't eaten anything.
	You would think.
	They got ice cream, though.
	Yeah.
	Oh, that should fill up, you know.
	They got the cone.
	So anyway, and I still am not harboring any ill will at this point.
	It's just kind of annoying.
	You know, I'm just happy to have some company.
	I haven't hung out with anybody in a while.
	So now we're back at the house starting the movie, and we have to pause it because is there a blanket?
	You're drinking.
	Like, you shouldn't have wrecked my house.
	I don't like drinking.
	It's actually that quote from the band Crass.
	If you choose to stray from the path that you've been taught, don't expect help and don't get caught.
	I thought you wrote that.
	So if you jizz on something, then make sure you clean it, or I don't know.
	Don't leave Coke everywhere for the kids to touch.
	Don't put away all your syringes.
	I guess I'm a boring guy.
	I just wanted to watch Knives Out.
	This is like James O'Keefe.
	Years ago, maybe 10 years ago, when he just started, he said, yeah, I'm a billionaire who really likes what we're doing.
	He gave me his apartment.
	And I go, where is it?
	And he goes, oh, it's really cool.
	It's right at the bottom of Central Park and it's a penthouse.
	So I'm looking out over all of Central Park, but I don't really know what to do with myself.
	I've just been watching movies and ordering food.
	And I was like, James.
	I see what you're saying.
	If that was me, there'd be a dead prostitute rolled up in a carpet.
	The place would reef of human secretions.
	It would be like pazoos in your house.
	Cigarette, ashtrays piled over, cocaine in the carpet.
	Nine juggalos.
	Heroin on the walls.
	Somehow there's heroin on the...
	Yeah, and the dartboard isn't.
	You'd open the door and a bear would be going.
	The dartboard is a human dartboard.
	Yeah.
	We got a guy tattooed the dartboard on it.
	That's the guy we just stole.
	Like at Chaz last week where they said Proud Boy stole a tranny.
	A star tranny, yeah.
	A stolen tranny dart.
	That's what we do.
	We'd make them a syringe dartboard.
	Help!
	Help!
	They're post-op areas of the bullseye.
	See?
	He said he doesn't want to hurt us, and then he was talking about stabbing us with syringes.
	Syringes.
	Full of AIDS.
	So you watch the movie.
	They're sitting under big thick blankets.
	I know the blankets you're talking about.
	They're fur, aren't they?
	Well, it's like Goldilocks.
	I told them they're like Goldilocks.
	I was like, the Goldilocks twins, because this blanket's just a little sound.
	And this blanket's, oh, this one's too.
	And then they're, do we have the AC?
	And I turn around.
	Do they have any AC?
	So that means they're warm, right?
	I turn around.
	You turn around and they're under a friggin' Pendleton blanket.
	Why don't you remove the blanket?
	Do you have to have a blankie?
	Now I sound like you.
	Do you have to have a blankie to go to bed, to watch a movie?
	They have to have a blankie over them.
	How about put some distance between you?
	So now they're behind me.
	I'm on, you know, the floor, you know, by myself.
	Just watch it.
	I'm fine with that.
	That's a fine setup here, right?
	But as we're watching the movie, they're all settled in.
	I guess they're dealing with sweating their balls off under this blanket, under this forced discomfort.
	So just to explain my basement, folks at home, there's a couch, but it's a very wide couch.
	It's kind of awkward, actually.
	It's a shelf that has storage underneath it, and then it's almost like a bed.
	It's really like a bed.
	So we have lots of pillows there to augment the fact that it's such a giant long right angle.
	And then we have these yogibos, which are these giant pillows that are about six feet long and tubes.
	And those are on the floor.
	And you can make those into whatever you want.
	They're all.
	So, there's a lot of room.
	Yeah.
	And they decide they want to go and sleep upstairs on my living room couch.
	Oh, but before even that.
	So, then the movies go in and stuff like that.
	And we're all hanging out, right?
	I'm pretty sure I'm a part of this.
	I'm not like a substitute teacher or like a stepdad, but so we're watching the movie.
	And I hear them just kind of talking to themselves.
	Like, I'm watching.
	We're all watching the movie.
	And I just kind of hear, oh, he was the guy that was in that thing.
	What was the thing he was in?
	And I'm like, like, I can't hear them.
	But I will hear this every now and then.
	Oh, Ryan, can you pause it?
	Yeah.
	You're an employee.
	What the?
	You're their little monkey servant.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	It's rude.
	It's just not nice what they were doing.
	It's like girls' little fun time, and I'm just like the camp counselor or something.
	Yeah.
	I just didn't feel like I had friends at that movie.
	It felt very disrespected.
	The disrespect?
	If you had any balls, you would have raped them.
	No, I wasn't interested in raping anybody.
	I want to watch a movie and just at least have some friends there.
	So, whatever.
	And then, so now it's late, you know, and because it took two hours to do this whole food, ice cream, bullcrap, it's now like late, so they don't want to drive home, so they fall asleep there.
	I pass out there, and then we wake up sometime in the morning.
	I was like, right, it's really hot.
	Can we just go upstairs, sleep on the couch?
	There's more room for them.
	The living room is warmer than the basement.
	Correct.
	And also, there's no room for two people to be on a couch.
	All my couches are normal, small couch size.
	Right.
	They have a bedside.
	You're on the largest couch in our home right now while you say, can I go upstairs?
	Correct.
	And then, oh, oh my God.
	So as they're leaving.
	In the morning, as they're leaving.
	If you stab them and then you're in court and you explained all this to the judge, I think you'd go, oh, I lost some of the evidence.
	Whoops, mistrial.
	They'd actually, just go, just go.
	They'd lift me out and start dancing like it's a like a bomb mitzvah.
	I'm on a chair.
	Like, ah, setta, set up.
	The parade judge just goes, don't you dare ever do that again.
	I don't mean kill them.
	I mean have them over your house again.
	So before they leave, I just remember this.
	They demand a mirror.
	And by the way, you know how your salon has like a bear in there?
	Yeah.
	Because there's a spooky bear that when she opened the door, she got spooked by it.
	Now she doesn't want to go in the bathroom in your salon.
	Because why?
	It's going to continually jump scare you?
	Is it going to come to London?
	You know who else is like that?
	My dog.
	Yeah.
	That's the IQ we're dealing with here.
	Leroy levels.
	Yeah, yeah.
	So you've gotten past the scare of the, oh, now you say, oh, wow, that's not a real bear.
	I'm no longer scared.
	Now I can use that bathroom.
	No.
	Yeah, you know, like it's a dead bathroom.
	Two-year-olds are, two-year-olds.
	Babies, they don't get over it.
	Babies don't want to be in that room.
	Right.
	Two-year-olds, they go, whoa, oh, huh.
	Yeah.
	So before they leave, in the morning, it's like something, something in the morning.
	It's like early before the sun comes up.
	They're about to leave.
	They need a mirror.
	But we have the mirrors that we use for the movie.
	I guess you didn't see those.
	They're in the storage room in the back by my work.
	No, yeah.
	I didn't search for their mirror because I didn't think that that was in the street.
	Well, they just go upstairs.
	In any of the other bathrooms, they all have mirrors.
	Yeah.
	But they didn't want to go to the bare one.
	I don't want them going upstairs, upstairs, because I don't know.
	It's just kind of get out.
	Like it's ready starting, the getting out process.
	Why do you need it?
	They just have all these little demands, little finicky needs before.
	That reminds me of this dude.
	Cheese.
	That was at my house, and I was having my 40th birthday parties.
	This was 10 years ago.
	And my wife got this band, Cerebral Balsy, to surprise me.
	So I just come downstairs and there's one of my favorite bands.
	And this is when we were upstate.
	So in the country, and she got a sound system and everything, like amps.
	And they're like, hey, Gavin, want some fucking whiskey?
	Yeah, these guys were just playing a show.
	And all my friends were there, surprise, surprise.
	Oh, he's got a Generation X. So anyway, as she's running around dealing with all this and the surprise, they made me go somewhere else while they set it all up.
	So when I came back, Jamie goes to my wife, hey, M, M, do you have any hair product?
	What?
	Yeah, sure.
	Would you like cream, gel, mousse?
	Let's get you all set up.
	That is weird.
	Yeah, and just to be clear here, all of these things, all these little itches and like finicky need, they're all needs.
	Everything stops from everything I'd like.
	No, no, no, no.
	I can't.
	So they didn't eat.
	They must have been starving at like 11.
	It's like there was guilt.
	They would apply guilt at like, really?
	Oh.
	Like, if their little thing didn't get solved.
	Woo!
	That's infuriating.
	I got a damn dog.
	What's going on here?
	All right, we've got a lot to cover today, as is the case with Mondays.
	Mondays!
	But I found a sliver of paper on my floor.
	Ryan didn't clean it up, I guess.
	Sorry.
	And I thought, this tiny sliver of paper says a lot.
	And I thought, let's go through every little part, every element of this useless sliver of junk mail and learn about the incredibleness that is Western man.
	So please join me as I deeply analyze a random piece of garbage on my bathroom floor.
	You're a big fan, so you're like a big fan, so you're like a big fan.
	Don't know much about the French I took.
	Don't know much about the stuff in books.
	Hi.
	This is a sliver of paper.
	Have you got the picture there, Rye Guy?
	Let me get out of the way here.
	Now, sometimes if I have a very old house and the toilet gets backed up, and sometimes I go ka chunk, chunk, chunk, and as I was going ka chunk, a big thing of toilet water with little fake traces of poo-poo and pee-pee are on the floor.
	Now, I could get in with a mop and take care of that, and then I got a shitty mop and blah, blah, blah.
	So, what I tend to do when this happens is I go and I get the New York Post and I just put it down on the pile.
	This cheap newsprint is incredibly absorbent and just sucks it all up.
	And then I pick it up and throw it in recycling.
	Don't have to do shizzin it.
	But occasionally, it'll sort of stick.
	So, as I ripped it up this time, a tiny sliver of, I guess, what appears to be junk mail, like a coupon thing, a tiny sliver was stuck on the ground.
	And I thought, I bet if I pick this up, and I guess it is kind of poopy-peepee, I bet if I pick this up and analyze everything I can out of it, we'll see incredible inventions by Western man.
	Because you know how I say, I'm a proud Western chauvinist.
	I refuse to apologize for creating the modern world.
	We don't have wonder anymore.
	And it pisses me off.
	The new focus for us as real justice warriors is K through 12.
	There's no education going on.
	There's no wonder being taught because so many white males are responsible for this stuff that they don't want to spend too much time on it.
	So they're like, yeah, let's focus on some beautiful mud hut tribesmen in Papua New Guinea made.
	No.
	That's a shitty mud hut.
	It sucks.
	I was in Harlem the other day, and they have a testament to African, early African architecture.
	I'm not kidding.
	There's two mud huts there in the middle of a park in Harlem.
	Not impressed.
	You want to see a Western, want to see castles a thousand years ago?
	They're pretty nice.
	They're pretty good.
	And they can take the rain, unlike your mud hut.
	And by the way, I stole this from a comedian, but he was talking about how you see these African women with the carrying the water on their heads for 30 miles a day.
	Why just move your shitty, disgusting mud hut closer to the river?
	Closer to the water supply.
	It's not like you're going back to a mansion.
	Fucking.
	Anyway, I think I was by Grand Central the other day, and they're building a high-rise on 42nd Street.
	Now, obviously, to keep that many floors from sinking into the ground, you have to have an insane foundation.
	So it's a quarter of a city block, this foundation.
	This cement must be, I don't know, 20 feet wide.
	And so they're building all that.
	It's perfectly level.
	Perfect, like Lego.
	It looks perfect.
	And they've built this.
	There should be classrooms there.
	There should be kids lining up with an architect or a construction foreman explaining how they lay the cement, explaining why it has to be so big, explaining the formula for the number of floors and what the foundation has to be.
	That would be fascinating, and kids would get so much out of that.
	Oh, there was a build.
	I remember actually, there was a building, I think it was in Williamsburg.
	It was either in Brooklyn or nearby over the Williamsburg Bridge, where they had built too many floors and there wasn't a sufficient foundation.
	So the city said this is dangerous and they had to remove floors.
	They're talking about doing it to a high-rise right off Central Park right now.
	One of those crazy, insane ones that have just sprouted up.
	It's called the Cube or something.
	One or one next to it, they have to remove floors.
	I don't know how the fuck you remove floors.
	That would be fascinating.
	Like, why doesn't, why don't they have, every school should have a timeline that goes down the hallway of the school, and it has Romans, and then, you know, the Dark Ages, and then we have the American Revolution, and we see where Braveheart goes, and we see where Bill the Butcher goes, and there's little cards for them.
	And it's like the whole length of the school is one big timeline.
	So then when you're thinking, when was the English fighting the Scots?
	Oh, there's our couple.
	And you just, oh, I remember that's by Mrs. Peterson's room.
	That would have been the 1300s, I guess, 700 years ago about.
	But they don't do that.
	They just teach a bunch of bullshit about how racist we were.
	My daughter has to see, watch hidden figures.
	And every time I look over her shoulder, I see black people being lynched and fires in Alabama with a black couple going, yes, we did some shitty things.
	Got it.
	Got that.
	Now can we focus on the awesome things?
	For example, here's a sliver from a coupon book that I found on my bathroom floor in my study, in my salon.
	Let's go through it, shall we, just for fun.
	This?
	I wish they'd do this in class.
	All right.
	So let's start with the coupon.
	This is a coupon, right?
	The coupon was invented by Coca-Cola.
	So there was a chemist in Georgia.
	What was his name?
	Was it John Pemberton?
	Yeah, that's him.
	So he invented Coca-Cola, but it was seen back then as for medicinal purposes.
	And for those of you who are not familiar with the way, the reason I pronounced it that way is because I was at a strip club in 2001 with my friend Trevor and my favorite kind of stripper, a Puerto Rican single mom with pendulous breasts and unfortunate tattoos.
	You don't want them to be healthy looking or you'd think, oh, their poor father.
	They have to be a little battered, a little haggard.
	And so she has black socks in her clear stripper shoes.
	And it was so gross and weird that it was hot.
	And so she's like, hey, what?
	And I go, I like your socks.
	What was that?
	When she leaned down, she had to hold her tits to her chest or they would hit us in the face.
	So she leans down and she goes, I go, I like your socks.
	It's sexy.
	And she wasn't sure if I was being sarcastic or not.
	And she's chewing gum as Puerto Rican ladies are wont to do.
	And she goes, for medicinal purposes.
	And after we were going, what does that mean?
	Like she has dry feet?
	So she, what, has some lotion, just goes into the sock and then puts on her wet, like, mucusy lube sock to help her dry feet?
	Or are they like those copper compression socks where she gets bad anchor?
	I don't know.
	Anyway, that's why I said medicinal purposes.
	So this genius, John Sith, wait, everything's backwards for me here.
	John Sith, he, there was cocaine in Coca-Cola and invented it as sort of a tonic.
	This is back, you know, the snake oil days.
	And it was, what did he do?
	He offered pharmacists two gallons of Coke syrup in return for the names and addresses of consumers who lived near that pharmacy.
	And they direct mail the coupon to the consumer.
	It was a classic new strategy.
	Consumers would get this thing in the mail for a free glass and, of course, try it, said Brown.
	And the pharmacist would keep buying the syrup.
	Win-win.
	Brilliant idea.
	Love it.
	And what was that?
	The next link is the history of coupons.
	I think that's where I got my quote from.
	Yeah.
	And then it's a non-boring history of coupons.
	And then everyone started doing it and it became improved upon again and again.
	That's the problem with some of these is they've been improved so much.
	I almost don't want to go back to the other thing.
	Okay, let's go back to our coupon.
	Oh, that's there it is.
	That was the coupon, the coupon.
	So we did the concept of the coupon itself.
	Now let's look at these things.
	What is that?
	That's a number.
	Who gave us numbers?
	Now we're told it was Islam, the Arab world with their incredible prowess.
	Maybe they were smart one day, but they really haven't done much for us lately.
	I think the inbreeding thing turned out to be pretty bad for their genetic makeup in the long run.
	What's the word for fucking your cousins?
	Thanks, Ryan.
	No, it's a name like miskagination.
	Cousins having sex with each other is a very cool consangenuity?
	Something like that?
	Anyway, so they've been doing that for a while and they lost it.
	But when Obama became president, they said, okay, so what are you going to do with NASA?
	Send some people to the moon?
	Make everyone watch hidden figures?
	No, worse.
	I'm going to take the head of NASA and send him around the world thanking Arabs for all the hard work they did with mathematics and science, which enabled us to go to the moon.
	Aren't you embarrassed?
	What are you talking about?
	What?
	So Jim Goad, our own beef squad's Jim Goad, wrote a great article about this 10 years ago now, geese, called Planet Islam.
	And he says, most of us have heard that the Arab world bequeathed its numerical system and the concept of zero to the West, but the truth is that the Arabs acquired all that from the ancient Indians, meaning from India, not feathers.
	And although it's true that Muslim scholars preserved many remaining scraps of antiquities literature while most of Europe was flailing about in the Dark Ages, it's also been established that much of the academic work performed during the so-called Islamic Golden Age was done by Christians and Jews working under Muslim domination.
	So, India gets the zero, but it's Judeo-Christians who made the mathematics we know today, the numbers we know today.
	By the way, I was having an argument with a guy about this, and he said, okay, well, it was still the Arabs, you know.
	And I said, wait, so you're saying slavery is good?
	And he goes, well, it accomplished a lot.
	Okay, so when we had slaves picking the cotton, that was good.
	And he said, well, you know, it built America.
	No, it didn't.
	The balance sheet was zero after the Civil War.
	If you build up a restaurant and then it's burnt to the ground and it's just ashes, and then you come back a few years later and there's a restaurant there, you can't say, I built that.
	That's my cotton money.
	No, it's not.
	Is my head touching the top here?
	No.
	Okay.
	All right, so that's numbers.
	And then it gets really interesting.
	Let's go back to our receipt.
	What is it?
	Our coupon?
	So then I'm looking at it, and I see a barcode.
	Wait, that's a little up.
	Yeah.
	The barcode.
	Who did that?
	Well, the barcode was a man named Norman Woodland in the 1950s.
	This ugly nerd just put it on some chewing gum in 1974 in Ohio.
	Oh, sorry, he invented in the 50s, but it didn't really catch on.
	People didn't quite understand the importance of it until the 1970s.
	The first thing they put it on was a thing of gum.
	Actually, this is very explanatory.
	Let's just let them do all the heavy lifting.
	Channel full.
	In the age of Trump.
	This is the only British video I've seen that doesn't talk about Nazis in the age of Trump.
	Shopping being scanned at the checkout is part of the soundtrack of everyday life.
	Today, the man who made this possible by inventing the barcode has died.
	Norman Woodland came up with the idea in a flash of inspiration in the 1950s.
	But it was fully 20 years before technology caught up and it could be used commercially.
	And when it did, it was this, a packet of chewing gum, which in Ohio in 1974 became the first product ever scanned and sold.
	Which in Singapore is illegal.
	As a circle.
	That just reminded me in advice whenever we didn't have an ad and I had a space for it, I would make up fake ads.
	And I made up ads from the Singapore Board of Tourism that just said fuck Wrigley's and had a big stick of gum because chewing gum's illegal there.
	Before being refined into the rectangle we all recognize, it was launched into America's shops in the late 1970s.
	While 15 years later, it still baffled George Bush Sr.
	They always got to get a little dig in.
	And it is baffling.
	I think he says in this there's 5 billion scans a day.
	Sorry if my brain just doesn't totally wrap itself around 5 billion little weird codes.
	And he's the only one that was confused by it, right?
	Yeah, everyone else went, got it.
	Beep, beep.
	For everyone else, it is a part of modern life.
	5 billion items are scanned every day.
	But the symbol has also permeated popular culture and is an inspiration for artists and designers.
	That's irrelevant, that last part.
	Why do you put that in?
	People draw it.
	Yeah, that applies to my next one.
	Scissors.
	Now, everyone says, let's go back to the picture, sorry.
	So here we have some scissors, right?
	Now, everyone says the Egyptians invented scissors.
	The scissors that I saw the Egyptians made, they're gay.
	Like, that's not really scissors.
	That's two knives with the hinge.
	Those are not the scissors we use today.
	The scissors we use today are much more like the ones Leonardo da Vinci created.
	So, if you look this up, they'll say, no, it wasn't da Vinci.
	And this is politically correct history that we get now.
	People think Egyptians were black.
	They were not.
	So they want to give any possible invention they can throw to Africa, they do.
	So they go, well, the Egyptians sort of had something.
	Yeah, the Arabs sort of did.
	What are you doing, Ryan?
	You're showing us the same shit.
	Maybe scroll down on this one.
	Yeah.
	See, these are the ones.
	They don't give Da Vinci credit for these.
	How no?
	These are fucking scissors, by the way.
	Them previous things, there weren't the scissors.
	That's the suzers.
	These look like the scissors that are in my catching the new.
	So, Leonardo da Vinci, thank you.
	Egypt?
	No.
	Let's go back.
	All right, what is this on?
	It's on a piece of paper.
	Now, China invented paper, but they invented paper that was gay.
	It was like rice paper.
	It was gaper.
	That was my nickname, by the way, when I was gay, because I would take such a thrashing in the bathhouses.
	The paper, the Chinese paper was that sort of ricey paper, and it wasn't able to be mass-produced.
	To mass-produce paper, and it's ironic that I'm talking about this because the reason I use the New York Post is because it's so throwaway and cheap, flimsy, that it's absorbent.
	In fact, did you know this?
	If someone's giving birth on the street and you're looking for something sterile, use newspaper.
	Because it just, it churns out so fast.
	It's actually pretty good.
	Just like McDonald's coffee is better than other places' coffee because they're constantly filling new pots.
	You don't get fresher than McDonald's coffee.
	So I'm not counting China's stupid paper.
	I'm talking about actually the paper that this piece of coupon is on was actually invented by two men at the same time.
	It's one of those weird things.
	Like Dennis the Menace, you know, the cartoon character?
	There's a Scottish Dennis the Menace.
	And they were invented basically on the same day at the same time.
	The Scottish Dennis the Menace, and then we have our American blonde.
	I grew up with the Scottish one.
	He's got black hair and a dog named Nasher.
	And he's in the Beano.
	Isn't that fucked up?
	And it's not like the guy who'd been traveling to America.
	It was like 1951, I think.
	Two different Dennis the Menaces were made.
	That's our Dennis the Menace.
	And he was so cool.
	He beat up nerds.
	He called them softies.
	He was always getting kicked out of school.
	Like, they really encouraged trouble.
	They encouraged you to get into mischief.
	He was always being chased by adults and teachers.
	Whatever happened to that?
	Now you go into a kid's bookstore and it's all like, here is a little black girl who wants to be a scientist.
	And here she is dressed as a doctor.
	And here's a handicapped boy who can play basketball just as good as all the other.
	And you're like, fuck off.
	Can you not bore our kids to death with this shit so early in life?
	Yeah.
	Anyway.
	So at the same time, this guy in Germany, Frederich Gottlieb Keller, came up with the idea of using wood pulp to make wood.
	And then, same day, same time, this guy in Nova Scotia, Charles Fennerty, and it says, in those days, paper was made from pulped rags, cotton, and other plant fibers, a technique used for nearly 2,000 years.
	See, they always got to give it to the Chinese.
	They always have to give it to the other group.
	Demand for paper was outstripping the supply of rags, and Europe started cutting down their shipments of cotton to North America.
	Imagine all the slaves we'd still need if we're still using cotton.
	By the way, during slavery, black unemployment was at 0%.
	No one ever talks about that.
	Fennerty had learned that trees have fibers too.
	Through discussions with the naturalist Titus Smith, doesn't that mean you're a nudist if you're a naturalist?
	That was the joke I did for Tiva Boots.
	At the age of 17, this is in 1838, he began his experiments of making paper from wood.
	By 1844, he had perfected the process, including bleaching the pulp to a white color.
	In a letter written by a family member circa 1915, it is mentioned that Charles Fernandez had shown a crude sample of his paper to a friend named Charles Hamilton in 1840, a relative of his future wife.
	Who cares?
	Though the family member in question would have been around eight at the time.
	What an irrelevant detail.
	Can some of you hacks in Wiki take out the extraneous sentences, please?
	On 26th of October, 1844, Charles Franny took a sample of his paper to Halifax's top newspaper, The Acadian Recorder, where he had written a letter on his newly invented paper saying, and then they go on and talk about how important this invention can be.
	Again, can this all be in school?
	Can teachers do shit like this?
	Can we have sliver of something day?
	You know, when I used to stay at the Crass House in summer, that old anarcho-punk band, they have a place called Dial House.
	It's like a communist, no, it's an anarchist commune.
	And we'd bring our kids.
	There'd be lots of kids there.
	And G. Vaucher would invite this botanist dude who would scoop out just a random scoop of a pond.
	They had a little pond there.
	And he'd lay it all out on a sort of like a big clear tray.
	And then he'd tell us all about this grass, this insect.
	This is in its pupil stage.
	And there was like tomes and tomes of information from this one scoop.
	We should do more of that in school.
	Scoops.
	But education is a fucking shit show.
	Those people hate me now, by the way.
	They call me, they told my wife that she has a terror spouse.
	Go back to the receipt now.
	Now, Volts, someone was talking the other day about how Africans see our stuff, and they go, what is that, Juju?
	Why do you have a soundboard?
	You make the noise here and it goes In the wire, and then it comes out loud in a computer machine television with newsprint on it.
	I don't understand that.
	You are Juju Voodoo, man.
	And I go, Yeah, I'm that too, though.
	Like, when I see a sewing machine, I'm like, This is voodoo.
	The needle goes up and down in the cloth, and somehow something loops around and catches it.
	How the fuck does it do that?
	I know how to sew.
	You have to let go and grab the needle on the other side.
	A sewing machine isn't grabbing nothing.
	How does it?
	I don't understand sewing.
	I think it's fucking voodoo.
	I think people who sew should be killed because they're Satanists.
	They're witches.
	Anyone involved in sewing should be burned at the stake.
	It's magic voodoo shit.
	Anyway, I feel the same way about voltage.
	What the fuck is electricity?
	I don't get it.
	Like this guy, what's his name?
	Alessandro Volta invented the electric battery.
	He lived in this, between 1745, 1827.
	He was like getting electricity out of fruit and using frogs as conductors.
	What?
	How?
	Like, I get that you have it and then you can give it to someone else.
	I don't understand how it gets there.
	Like, you have a water mill, and it's spinning with this water.
	And the next thing you know, you got some electricity.
	Hey, you want to power a car?
	I was just touching some water for a while here.
	I turned it into magic energy.
	That's insane.
	He should be burned at the stake as a witch.
	He made a deal with the devil.
	I'm glad he's in hell now, this voodoo man.
	I curse you, Alessandra Volta.
	I curse you for your magic.
	You are gay.
	You are a bino.
	So, I mean, you can read all about voltage.
	Obviously, you're familiar with voltage and how it was discovered and his competitors.
	He had a big rivalry with some other electricity guy.
	Just an incredible life, incredible discovery.
	We should be in awe of him.
	Schools should be bowing, saying, they're sitting there in air conditioning.
	Alessandro Volta is the reason.
	They should be just thanking him.
	There should be a Lord's Prayer and then a thank you to Alessandro Volta and then a thank you to the Carrier brothers who invented AC.
	But no, they're white men.
	Do we have any Papua New Guinean people?
	Yeah, they invented a way to throw a spear.
	Yeah, so did I 300,000 years ago?
	And then what else?
	What's put all this together?
	Like you've got a picture here, you have text, you were able to do the dotted line.
	Well, that concept is called WYSIWYG.
	And that's called what you see is what you get publishing.
	So that really, because I was in publishing back in the early 90s when you didn't really have Quark Express and this What You See is What You Get Publishing.
	So you would print strips of a column, print them out, literally glue them to a big sheet, and you'd make almost like a collage.
	You would make your newspaper page with glue.
	This is in like 92.
	Now, Quark Express existed, but people didn't really have access to it, and it hadn't really exploded.
	And then you would send that to the printer.
	And you'd, this is even crazier.
	You would have an R, if you had a color page, then you'd have three.
	You'd print out an R, red, a B, blue, and a G, green.
	And then they would merge all those.
	Like, what is this?
	The fucking 1500s?
	What am I a monk producing scrolls?
	So this all started with it.
	Apple and their cheap printers really helped sort of the dark age in the 80s.
	So that would be Steve Jobs.
	He was the first guy to sort of pioneer this concept, but it still sucked.
	And then in the early 90s, we had this thing called PageMaker.
	That's the thing I was just talking about.
	But then Quark Express came out.
	And I remember when it came out, it was a game changer.
	Now, I guess he started the company in 87, but we didn't really have access until maybe 95, 94.
	And then all of a sudden, you're seeing the page in front of you.
	And soon we were able to make PDFs, that was a few years later, and just send them off.
	So from 1992 till 1999, we had like fucking a thousand years of desktop publishing evolution.
	Why isn't that taught in school?
	I know guys, actually the guy who was with me when she said medicinal purposes, Trevor Simser, his dad was one of the guys that would be at the paper plant putting the R sheet, the big, because they make it out of steel.
	They take your page, make it out of steel, and that would become like a giant circular stamp.
	So he would make the R thing and wrap it around the roller and the G thing.
	They're dealing with like these big sheets of tin because it would be about eight pages on one thing and then they would cut and fold it, right?
	He lost his career during the time I was doing.
	I got him out of a job in a way.
	My demand for a better system pushed him out and that's the end.
	His entire career, his vocation, which went back generations.
	I think my uncles and grandfather, when they worked at the paper mills, they were doing the same kind of process.
	And that's gone now.
	That job is eradicated.
	And it was thanks to Quark Express.
	So Quark Express was started by a homo, Tim Gill is his name.
	Do we got a picture of him down here?
	There he is.
	Hi, Tim.
	Hi, boys.
	Hope you like my desktop publishing.
	I did.
	I loved it.
	You might remember me from the bathhouse.
	My nickname was Gaper.
	Oh, yeah.
	Sorry about the eights.
	Don't worry about it, Tim.
	God, I'm fucking juvenile.
	But the problem with Quark is it had a bit of trouble with pictures.
	So you'd see your page, and the picture would sort of be there, but it was really just a placeholder, and then it would have to find the picture when it came time to print.
	So it would be, it wouldn't, it wouldn't have so much data.
	Because like a magazine could be like two gigs these days.
	And moving two gigs around takes forever.
	Anyway, he fell asleep at the wheel around 2000 and was replaced by Adobe InDesign, which is what everyone uses now.
	And it is fucking awesome.
	It's Photoshop and Quark Express combined.
	And now you can tweak pictures in the actual thing.
	This was a little after my time, so I'm better at Photoshop and Quark.
	I used to lay out vice because I was too cheap to pay a graphics guy, so I just took a course.
	But yeah, that was a long way of saying desktop publishing.
	I would give it to Tim Gill.
	And then, yeah, that's what we have.
	Now, I tried to figure out what kind of plug.
	This is some sort of adapter that goes from male to female.
	I don't know, for boats and stuff.
	It was over my head.
	I tried to like the male and female concept.
	You could go on forever here.
	But that is just a small portion of a piece of garbage on my bathroom floor.
	And behind that little tiny sliver, this useless little piece of paper, we have an entire universe of incredible accomplishments, these entrepreneurs busting their ass.
	Totally ignored.
	None of us have ever heard of any of these people besides maybe Steve Jobs, whose symbol is Satan biting an apple.
	But the rest of them are just getting washed away into bullshit social justice warrior history.
	Well, I'm not having it.
	I want to know about this stuff now.
	At the age of 49, I finally want to go to school.
	I finally care about all this stuff because I see it getting washed away.
	They don't just want to eradicate statues.
	They want to eradicate this.
	They want to eradicate all of our accomplishments.
	They deny that we invented the Western world.
	They deny that we invented civilization.
	The University of Glasgow came up with the concept of separating church and state.
	That's why we have progress.
	The Industrial Revolution was us.
	That changed everything permanently.
	The penicillin, the leaps and bounds we've made in antibiotics, why aren't we revering these?
	What's the matter with pride?
	You can have your gay pride.
	You can have your Duneteenth, but I'd like some Western pride, please.
	Remember, we didn't start slavery, but we ended it.
	We ended it.
	I'm Steven Crowder.
	I'm not dissing him, yo.
	Maybe we should start the show at some point.
	It's been an hour of you gossiping about your friends.
	Ryan gossiping.
	And me talking about garbage on my bathroom floor.
	Did you see this on Daily Mail?
	Someone drove into CHOP early this morning and started shooting.
	And they got shot back at.
	Whoever did this, what did you think was going to happen?
	You just take over?
	You can't invade a country with one white Jeep.
	I wonder if that's the same white vehicle that was stealing trannies.
	What a fucking mess.
	All right, we're starting the show now, unfortunately.
	Follow me on Parlor.
	Parlor's exploding.
	I think I got like 70,000, 80,000 followers there.
	I'm doing lots of posts.
	Dude, you should have seen a sunset the other night.
	I was up in the Hamptons.
	What the hell?
	It's a ZZ Top logo.
	Whoa.
	Why are you saying what the hell?
	Don't you follow me on Parlor?
	I didn't see that.
	I can't see at all.
	Oh, wow.
	That is pretty cool.
	It's not bizarre.
	I've never seen a sharp angle in a cloud before in my life.
	But there's multiple.
	And that was gone, by the way, in about five minutes.
	Wow.
	That is weird.
	I think it was a shout-out to me, because I always push girls to dress like the accelerator girls in the ZZ Top video legs, I believe.
	Mm-hmm.
	Wear little gloves, fingerless gloves that are lace.
	Dress like Madonna in the 80s, but with high heels.
	Anyway, here's a funny one.
	So a buddy of mine, just for a joke, made a fake meme.
	He made a fake protest, but it was just a meme.
	And the satire was pretty clear the first time I saw it.
	Make sure you show the right one.
	Not people retweeting it, but the original.
	So he goes, hey, ladies, if you're so into feminism and equality, why don't you go for a jog at Morningside Park?
	Morningside Park is the most dangerous place to be in Manhattan.
	It is north of Central Park in Harlem, I guess.
	And Tessa Majors was murdered there for trying to buy pot.
	They said, give us your money.
	She said, fuck no, because she's a badass feminist who doesn't take any shit.
	And so they stabbed her to death and got away with it, by the way.
	I don't know what the guy who did the actual stabbing is, but the man who handed him the knife, no probs.
	Probation.
	You're good.
	Proud boys get four years.
	So people started retweeting it.
	Women, and they look how he spelled women.
	Womenixons.
	2.30 a.m. in Morningside Park.
	For our jogger friends who would love to show your support, check out this BLM run happening tonight.
	That's like even funny.
	Our jogger friends after the wow.
	Yeah.
	How retarded can you get?
	Share.
	Please share.
	You know, none of these people saying share would not even think about it.
	That's their activism.
	Just like, I'm helping.
	But this is the same as the free bleeding scam.
	Remember that?
	4chan trolls said, ladies, empower yourselves.
	Don't use it tampon.
	Oh, there it is in Bushwick Daily.
	They list it as a great thing to do.
	In Manhattan, you know, there's Occupy All-Day City Hall, Washington Square Park, Frederick Douglass Circle, Triton Park, let's go down here to, oh, 2.30 a.m.
	Saturday morning, Morningside Park, the Wimkickens Nights Jog.
	And also on Brooklyn Vegan.
	Oh, really?
	Oh, yeah.
	There's the flyer.
	God.
	Amazing.
	Wow.
	That is hilarious.
	It's crazy.
	Ladies, don't go to Morningside Park ever under any circumstances.
	People don't go to Morningside Park.
	It is fucking Dinkins town.
	But we're getting back.
	We're back to the 80s.
	We're back to Dinkins.
	New York will never be the same.
	But yes, to finish the free bleeding thing, they said, ladies, empower yourselves.
	Don't wear tampons.
	There's nothing wrong with what you're doing.
	And they showed Photoshop pictures of women in white jeans with period stains.
	Then women started doing it.
	And they started, the hashtag went crazy.
	They started doing marathons.
	there was this Indian woman who's doing a marathon free bleeding.
	Why have you not been looking up free bleeding this entire motherfucking time?
	I was looking in the notes for it.
	And then I realized I closed my notes.
	Isn't that amazing?
	Free bleeding.
	Just look up free bleeding.
	You might want to look away if you're eating lunch or dinner right now.
	Periods.
	No, it's one word, asshole.
	Periods are a waste.
	Like poo-poo and pee-pee.
	You shouldn't be ashamed that you go poo-poo and pee-pee.
	That's fine.
	But we don't want to see it, believe it or not.
	And look, it took off.
	That was one of the first to take it seriously.
	Unbelievable.
	And this, by the way, is how you handle these kinds of things.
	You need humor.
	We need to make jokes about all this, or we're going to go nuts.
	Speaking of not making a joke and being dead serious, so the auction, we have the new auction up for my drawings.
	Last time we raised, the last burst raised $3,877.
	I'm a successful artist.
	People buy my stuff.
	This one we're up to almost $3,000.
	That above me is the total, total, total.
	Usually they're around $350.
	How much is that Prowboys one going for?
	$325.
	Come on, guys.
	I might just buy it for more than that.
	What's that one going for?
	$1,600?
	Yeah, yeah.
	That's weird.
	Okay, so the moral of the story is make more brand heavy kind of ones.
	Anyway, just to show you that the money goes where it's going to go, here's a screenshot of before I put the money in.
	No, that's after.
	9.15 is the first.
	Yeah.
	So it was at 39,495, and now it's up to 43,372.
	It's going to be up to 46 soon with this new dose.
	Reasonable.
	Reasonable.
	That's nice.
	I think John's lawyer fees are been around $40,000.
	I think Max spent around $30.
	And Trigger Tom.
	He's already done his time, really.
	He doesn't need any.
	Okay, I saw this and thought it was a joke.
	I saw a picture of it first and it said, this is America.
	And I was thinking of Childish Gambino.
	And I go, that's funny.
	What is that from?
	What movie is that from?
	No, it's fucking real, folks.
	This is St. Louis over the weekend.
	Turn it up.
	This is South Africa.
	Are they going to make fun of us for saying this is like South Africa?
	But they're filming them.
	Yeah, I'm sure they're really ashamed.
	Dude, if that was my house, I would be like, make sure you get this on camera, that when you come to my house, you get your head blown off.
	And you know what I was thinking when I was watching this?
	Would love to see how he got his money.
	They just think he got his money from a magic fountain.
	Meanwhile, they have had maybe two shitty jobs that they were always late for.
	And you know that he busted his ass with some like real estate thing with time shares and then taking that money to invest in flipping properties and then getting that money to do a hedge fund and like 12-hour days.
	You know, people think maybe rich British people, maybe rich Europeans have a lot of old money, but America are all nouveau riche.
	That guy busted his ass.
	And that's why he has the balls to pull in a gun because he's been at the bottom.
	And here they are.
	Fuck you, rich person, you have money.
	That's really what this whole, all this writing is about.
	And that's why it's going to be so great for Trump.
	Because we've seen their side.
	If they were on the streets saying, better infrastructure, the bridges are collapsing and health care.
	We need better health care.
	Old people are dying.
	It's not fair.
	As far as the guns thing goes, it's not our hill to die on.
	America seems very pro-gun.
	We're forgetting about all our anti-gun stuff.
	America would probably be going, and if they weren't smashing anything, of course, I think America would go, I think Joe Biden would probably be winning.
	But they're doing the opposite.
	They're saying, this is what would happen.
	What, was that him?
	A decades-long renovation returns a Midwestern Palazzo to its original glory.
	When attorneys Mark and Patsy McCloskey bought their home in February 1988, it was the color of cigarette ashes, still dirty from the days when St. Louis lay under a blanket of coal smoke.
	So they put a lot of work into this.
	Why are you reading it like that, like a cool guy, like Mark Norman?
	It's a little more interesting than that.
	Whoa, look at that thing.
	By the way, you want to be an attorney?
	Go to law school.
	Pass the bar.
	Get back to me.
	Fuck them, those rich bastards.
	All they did was go to court a bunch of times and argue in defense of their client.
	I could do that.
	I deserve that.
	When he was born, the doctor just said, it's white.
	And then they just stuffed money in his pocket.
	They get it from the National White Fund.
	And I love how all these Antifa 2 are so workers' union.
	The workers unite.
	International Workers Unite.
	And it's always on the patch, the logo, it's always some guy in like a peaky blinders hat with like a huge hammer and overalls.
	Ah, king.
	I'd love to.
	Max, the proud boy in prison, that was his job working on the railroads at Grand Central.
	King!
	King!
	Metro North, big, big, you know, railroad spiked.
	Kang!
	I'd love to see any of those Antifa do that for one day.
	For one day.
	I bet they couldn't even do community service, like pick up garbage from the highway.
	I bet they'd be cheating half the time.
	All right.
	Also in the imbecile anarchist box, we have Jack Pasobic.
	So this one is a beaut.
	Like, why do humor anymore?
	Humor's done.
	So these guys, that's asshole-eyed, by the way.
	Jason Charter, he's the guy who got me kicked out of CPAC.
	And just to recap the story, I was doing fake cocaine, right?
	I remember my talk with Alex Jones, and I pretended that I hit my head when I came on and I was disoriented and I was nervous.
	And then I did a line and chugged a beer and I was back and ready to rock.
	He took it seriously and he comes up to me at CPAC and goes, Hey, Gavin, why don't you go do some more cocaine?
	Like he had caught me or something?
	And I was like, who is this fly?
	We call them flies now, these people who get in our face.
	And he said, I couldn't tell if he was on my side or not, too.
	I just thought, oh, you're just a nerd who hates cocaine.
	He's a really weird-looking dude.
	He's got these sunken anus eyes and a stick, and he walks like a gimp, which he uses in his favor, right?
	So he goes, takes a picture with me.
	There he is.
	And he goes, he just whispers.
	He goes, you're a piece of shit, you know.
	So I came up to him and later on, look at his face.
	He looks like he's from the Adams family.
	I came up to him and I just sort of put my chest towards him, you know, where you sort of make someone walk backwards.
	And I was like, you want to do something?
	Let's do something.
	You want to go outside?
	How do you want to do this?
	You don't have to do passive-aggressive little comments.
	I'm happy to meet you right now.
	Let's do anything you want.
	And he goes, don't touch me, Gavin.
	And then he ran and got security and got us kicked out.
	It's 100%.
	You could hear his voice.
	Oh, my God.
	Oh, there's Jacob.
	Oh, I know you.
	How do you know?
	What's up, man?
	You know this guy.
	How's the line of coat you did yesterday?
	How did you find out the line of coat you did yesterday?
	It's like someone's paid him to get punched in the face.
	That's definitely him.
	You called it.
	Yeah.
	So anyway, these imbeciles want to take down a statue of an abolitionist that was paid for by freed slaves.
	So this black tour guide who does DC black tours is saying, guys, please don't take this down.
	It's an anti-racist statue.
	In fact, part of my pay that I put a roof over my head and feed myself is taking people to this statue and explaining what it is.
	And you look, they want to tear it down.
	They're wrestling with him.
	I can't breathe.
	Okay, y'all.
	Everybody out here, I want you to understand something very important.
	Something very important.
	This is what I'm trying to say.
	This is what I'm trying to say.
	But you won't get no upon this thing.
	Why can't you win this without a bunch of mouths, no ears, no brains?
	Why are you letting this man talk?
	Psobic, who was filming the man's speech, was blocked by members of Antifa from filming the event, all of which caught live on Periscope.
	The situation escalated when a blackhead Antifa insurgent, that's asshole eyes, wearing a pair of red ski goggles, by Skommet, whom I refer to as goggles, identified Psobek and accused him of founding the alt-light.
	What's the matter with that?
	Get out.
	Look, they just poured water all over him.
	Get up out.
	Go in the jail, over there.
	You're a safe, easy guy.
	You're so confused in your life.
	You're so confused in your life.
	You're looking at the white room.
	You're so confused in your life.
	You're looking at the white room.
	Wasn't he a Marine?
	He's in the military.
	Oh, that must be his bodyguards?
	Fuck out of here, Jack!
	You fucking you know Nazi piece of shit!
	That's her guy.
	Come on, Zyle!
	Come on, Z Kyle!
	Zyle, who's Winter Tensor!
	I'm the Clark Brothers!
	You fucking Nazi trash!
	It's true!
	Get the fuck out of here!
	End up being a little nausea drinking lunch.
	So that was funny.
	I talked to Jack and I go, you know that's Jason Charter, right?
	And he goes, yeah, the cops are familiar.
	Here's another.
	Here's another gem from the idiot box.
	So they go into wait, wait, let's hear that.
	Let's hear that.
	Sorry, I shouldn't have said no.
	You're going to fucking behind me.
	Don't you leave.
	I'm not in the park anymore.
	What do you want me to do?
	Get out of here.
	This is the game.
	Go home.
	Go.
	Go home.
	Do you like your city?
	You just don't want to fly again, do you?
	You're going to fucking get it.
	Idiot the fuck out of you out of your car because you're afraid your car is going to get picture taken and then people are going to know your license.
	You don't know who he is.
	I'm Vincey in that.
	You're doing it right now.
	You're in.
	I think we're all black people are not going to be able to do it.
	Jack could kick all of your asses with a cigarette in his mouth while texting his wife that he's going to be late.
	You know, oh shit.
	Oh, they got him.
	That's okay.
	So what's now he's complaining?
	Look, someone gave me a sunburn.
	What is that?
	Is it the sun?
	Apparently, Jack Posobic filed a police report against me, said that it did not happen.
	I'm literally standing next to cops right now.
	I find it deplorable that the DC police department gave Jack Prisobic a free ride to his car.
	NPD loves neo-Nazis.
	That chick was, you notice in the last two clips that we showed, and there's one I could think of too, which were like some short Latina woman swats away the guy's bullhorn, the black guy's bullhorn.
	She's the one who actually tries to attack Jack the most.
	She's gonna poured water on him.
	Yeah, it's always chicks.
	And it's like, okay, do you want to, are we having a fist fight now?
	It's a similar type of chick.
	It's like a small Latina angry butch kind of chick.
	But it's always provocation, right?
	It's sort of like you just keep pushing and pushing and pushing, trying to get slapped, trying to get something.
	And then they get it and they go, like, like if you were to punch that girl who was grabbing that sign, she would scream, have a heart attack, go police.
	That asshole eyes is a gimp.
	So if you shove, you go, ah, I'm handicapped.
	Help, help.
	Yeah, well, that's exactly what happened with that.
	The female attacks her, the female Antifa attacks her.
	Then she goes and cries on somebody else's.
	Oh, yeah, I see that.
	Yeah, yeah.
	She's just bawling her eyes out.
	That's the whole cycle right there.
	Wait, did I send you this?
	I don't see it here in my notes.
	There was a guy, the cops are in trouble.
	Oh, yeah, it was on a.
	It was on Public Freakout, Reddit, which has become totally cucked now.
	And it was Minneapolis cops.
	No, I don't think it's in my notes, dude.
	Oh, God.
	Go to Public Freakout, Reddit.
	But the Detroit police are in big trouble for running down protesters.
	And this is exactly what we were just talking about.
	They mob a car.
	And by the way, the law says that if you feel that your life is in danger, Ryan, you're showing us your screen.
	If you feel that your life is in danger, scroll down, just scroll down.
	You're allowed.
	Wait, is that it?
	Stop, stop.
	Yeah, that's it.
	If you feel that your life is in danger, if you stay there, then you're allowed to go forward.
	If people are attacking your car with hammers and they're going to get through and kill you, you can run over whoever you want.
	And don't make that into a Z-Kil.
	You can run over babies.
	Your life's in danger.
	You're allowed to protect your life.
	So we've seen what these people do to police cars.
	And the cops are doing this thing, which I think is the safest thing to do when you feel like your life is in danger.
	Just jing.
	Jing.
	That'll hit them out of the way, give them time to move, show that you're not fucking around.
	A pulse.
	But the takeaway here is that cops are just mulling down random innocent people who are just minding their own business trying to kill you.
	Play it big.
	Play it big.
	Listen to them scream.
	You're the funny rock.
	The rack, did you see that guy with the white t-shirt?
	Do the three Stooges walk?
	Look at him.
	And then...
	Shut up, but then they always do this too.
	Then they chase it.
	Like, what are you going to do?
	Beat it up?
	And they scream, like, what are you doing?
	They attacked this car.
	It attacked me.
	Listen to the woman.
	Two seconds ago, she's like, fuck you.
	I don't know, Justin.
	I need to stop the middle.
	Shut up.
	The fact that, like, I see that and I go, oh, it's too bad the cops were such pussies and took it so easy on them.
	And everyone else watches it and goes, what the fuck is happening?
	The police are just hitting those poor innocent kids who just jumped on their car.
	He's not in trouble.
	I want to see what any of those critics do if someone jumps on their car.
	All right, last one I'm going to show you.
	Is he in trouble?
	Who?
	Oh, the cop.
	I would not be remotely surprised if he was fired.
	Target.
	So they go into Target in DC, which is in kind of a shitty neighborhood.
	And look, I get my news from censored.tv now, which you can go to.
	Not on the app, but on the website, we have constantly hot stories like this.
	It's not my notes.
	That's going to be a separate thing.
	Where, you know, clown world updates.
	So I think if you click on Target, DC Target, this fat, ugly tranny in a mesh shirt.
	Mesh shirts, by the way, are a great way to show your abs if you're in great shape.
	If you're not, it's a great way to show your disgusting, weird walrus tits, which is what this fucking loser does.
	But like, these people are so far below us.
	It's, it's infuriating that we have to discuss them like we're on the same planet as them.
	These are fucking flies.
	Listen, okay, first of all, chants are retarded.
	Like, say your demands or whatever, explain why you get them.
	Show what the threat is.
	I don't know what the fuck.
	But to do a chant, and then even within the chant world, this is pathetic.
	Listen to this chant.
	All black people, all black people, they repeat.
	All black people, he says, all black people, they repeat.
	Meanwhile, he's a fucking conquistador.
	He's a Spaniard.
	Living around in this neighborhood.
	Living around in this neighborhood?
	Is there one black person there?
	There's a few mulattoes.
	Oh, there's one.
	Oh, no.
	In this neighborhood, living around in this neighborhood, because you prioritize money over people.
	He's handing out water, you know, because it's so exhausting to sit down in the hot sun.
	Anyone need a water?
	The hot light of the fluorescent bulbs in that blistering 70 degrees.
	That perfect shopping comfort weather.
	In that climate that is designed to be as comfortable as possible so you won't leave and you'll keep buying.
	So his beef is that Target is in a poor area because it puts profits over people.
	What?
	I'm here.
	And by the way, isn't that good for you to have a Target?
	Because you prioritize money over people!
	Because you prioritize money over people!
	So until...
	Free the people, fight the power...
	Fuck the police.
	Please continue to shut your business down.
	Just pause, did you catch that?
	Until you stop calling the police on us for shoplifting, we're going to shut your business down.
	We have to shoplift because we're poor, and you're the one who put this delicious free shit in our neighborhood.
	Oh, my God.
	Let's start your business now.
	We need to eat the second.
	Whew.
	Whew.
	All right.
	Let's go to the mailbag.
	Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dad.
	Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag.
	Let me touch it.
	All right, so we're in overtime.
	By the way, did I talk about my new invention?
	My fanny pack?
	What's the invention part of that?
	It's my new summer look.
	Because I've noticed I keep changing my bottoms.
	I'll have my jorts on, then a bathing suit, then at night I have pants, and I'm constantly migrating my keys.
	Uh-huh.
	Damn.
	I got a cute little invention for my keys.
	I upgraded my key.
	I use fanny packs all the time, by the way, too.
	My friend.
	Well, yours are different.
	Yours are like the big, huge ones.
	I got a big, huge one, and I got a small one.
	But look at this.
	This is a key thing that your keys don't jingle.
	They just fold like a switchblade.
	And it has a thing where if I lose the keys, that's a little chip, and I could locate it and ring my keys, or I could ring my phone if I click it.
	So they locate each other.
	Let me see that, though.
	It feels like it's a big lead weight inside your pocket.
	No, it's very comfortable.
	Yeah, it doesn't jingle around.
	And it kind of, I barely, sometimes I don't even know it's in there.
	I'm like, oh, is it in there?
	And if you walk too far away from your keys, it alerts you.
	It's like, hey, you left your keys back there.
	Isn't that cool?
	And there's a USB on there, too?
	But you only have three keys.
	Yeah.
	That's not a normal adult male.
	Well, that's all.
	I've got my triumph.
	I've got my Range Rover.
	I've got my Bimmer.
	Bummer.
	I've got my Bummer.
	My front door, back door, studio keys.
	I only got the three keys.
	The list goes on.
	I think I'm going to get a car.
	I saved up enough money, I think.
	You don't have any money, dude.
	You're $12,000 in debt.
	But I saved up a lot of cash.
	Didn't pay off your debts.
	Okay.
	All right.
	So this one I'm skipping way ahead, Ryan.
	It's called No Way.
	No Way is who it's from, and the subject is G-O-M-L Reading Terror Attack.
	Okay, from No Way.
	Hi, Gavin.
	Regarding the murder of three people in England in Reading by Kerry Sadala.
	Now, we haven't really been covering this, but Britain has been up to its old tricks again, and there's been a lot of stabbings.
	So this guy in Reading stabbed, he was a Libyan refugee.
	Why the fuck are we taking refugees from Libya, a country that has tried to kill us many times, and not white farmers in South Africa?
	It was basically the same culture.
	Senior Lenin Kopp probably would have joined BLM protests if he wasn't an officer.
	Wait, is that what I sent you?
	No, that's in the.
	Okay, Kari's Facebook page is still up.
	On it, his cover picture is a hand-drawn note signed Kahari Thug.
	Beneath this picture is a comment in Arabic.
	I took a screenshot of it along with the Facebook translation.
	The Facebook translation is a weird soup message of love and tolerance.
	I copy and pasted the same message into Google Translate and got a very different translation.
	See what you make of it.
	Also, a BLM protest was held in that same park two hours earlier, yet this is being scrubbed.
	No connection has been made between this protest and the murders.
	Neil Bassu, the Assistant Commissioner of the London Metropolitan Police, in charge of the investigation, has previously publicly stated he's a supporter of BLM.
	By the way, I saw a soccer match on when I was at the pub, and they're putting in the crowd sounds.
	Yeah, I heard that, yeah.
	And they all take a knee.
	Every single coach, every single player takes a knee, and they all have a patch on their uniform that says Black Lives Matter.
	All of them.
	It's a regime.
	So you're really that worried about American police brutality?
	Police brutality in Britain?
	I wish.
	Yeah.
	It's nothing but cops getting stabbed by Muslims.
	There's, yeah, brutality and police are a thing over there, but it's just the other way around over there.
	Also, a BLM protest was held.
	Can't imagine why no link has been made between the murders and the protest.
	Yeah, good point.
	So here's this thing.
	There's the comment, right?
	And then, so I guess the original was, be better, head.
	I swear to God that you are dear and precious and take care of his heart from their franks, the franks of harem, and stay like the first English, each one and everyone and everyone.
	And another is giving him his soul.
	Myself and God, have mercy on him.
	Except he died.
	I get it, or else I'm senile.
	Okay?
	So then he puts it in and he gets, well, rasped by God, you are dear and good.
	You took it.
	You stole it from their forbidden ones, the forbidden ones.
	And let you be like the first English people, each one and his sharks and each one of his others.
	And he restores him with his soul.
	Myself and his family are unforgiving unless he dies.
	There's so much sanitizing of the Muslim problem in London.
	It really is revolting.
	It's ethnomasochism.
	To the point of death.
	I mean, they've got fucking acid attacks out the wazoo and they're talking about police brutality.
	The police don't do shit in Britain.
	Unless you're Tommy Robinson, then they do a lot.
	So yeah, just go to Mailbag there.
	Britain's getting confusing here.
	You're going to see a lot of the same sounding names, but it's different crimes.
	So there is the sun.uk there.
	What are you doing?
	No, no.
	Go to our notes.
	Okay.
	There we go.
	Top one in Mailbag.
	So Redding terrorist suspect, let out of prison early, claimed to be ISIS fighter and Libyan child soldier on M5 Mirror.
	So that's the guy we were just reading about.
	That's the guy who had that cryptic Muslim prose.
	They just showed the three people that he killed.
	And, oh, is this footage of them being killed?
	A man detained by officers following a frenzied...
	Following a frenzied stabbing attack.
	That's him being arrested.
	Go down?
	Yeah, that's our little friend.
	So, around the same time, of course, we have Glasgow.
	Not to be confused with the Glasgow stabbing, which was a big African-looking Muslim refugee.
	That's the next link down.
	Come on, buddy.
	You can do this.
	And now you know what the take is for that?
	He's Muslim, right?
	Go down.
	What's his name?
	I don't run it out of line.
	Adaba.
	That's looking pretty darn Muslim.
	From Sudan.
	Three asylum seekers.
	Two members of hotel staff and a police officer were stabbed.
	Oh, I hate police brutality.
	All six victims aged between 17 and 52 remain in hospital.
	So the takeaway from this is, this is the British spin on this one.
	He was in a hotel room.
	They put the asylum seekers in a hotel room.
	He was in a hotel room and he was all cooped up in there and there wasn't sunlight and he hated it in there.
	Go to, it's our fault his hotel sucked.
	So this guy, so apart from the inconvenience, having a lie, live in a decent hotel at taxpayers' expense, the inconvenience, this is again, Tommy on Parlor.
	Tommy's blowing up on Parlor, by the way.
	He loves it there.
	Lack of sufficient Wi-Fi and internet connectivity.
	What else could be so wrong with this establishment that caused an asylum seeker to stab people?
	Maybe lack of sunlight, vitamin D?
	So, this guy with the huge frizzy hair, he was friends with the stabber.
	And he says, No, the conditions were really bad at the hotel.
	By the way, you're an asylum seeker.
	You're getting away from your war-torn hellhole, and you complain about the hotel.
	You know what his complaints were, Frizz Head?
	He said, Yeah, we're told that, you know, breakfast, you only got two hours between 7 and 9 a.m. to get breakfast.
	And then with dinner, it's equally draconian.
	He didn't say draconian.
	It's 6 to 8 p.m.
	And if you show up at 5.59 or 8.01, you're out of luck.
	So you only have those two hours to get your food.
	What?
	That's the same as my house, by the way.
	When my wife calls for dinner, you have about five to ten minutes to no, five minutes to get there max.
	Or you're in trouble.
	You're rushing to get there from your job, I'm assuming.
	Did you click on that last one?
	The food suck?
	The food suck?
	Immigrates.
	Can you believe the losers we've been dealing with on this show?
	I showed you a little slip of garbage and all the awesomeness behind it and how we could be focused on that as a nation, especially in school, especially in K through 12.
	And who do we focus on?
	These fucking losers.
	Oh, wait a minute.
	Yeah, let's hear him talk.
	He was saying, like, the people against him, the people hate him.
	Like, the next room, they was making some noise.
	He was saying the noise was just to disturb him.
	The room on the top of him, the same.
	Like, it's normal.
	One day he said, I want to attack them.
	I want to attack that room next to me, that room on the top of me.
	And he said, I want to attack the hotel workers.
	I said him, not need.
	It's no logic to do that.
	Everyone, it's fine.
	Just try to ignore everything.
	We said everyone, no one was happy inside.
	All right, we have two final videos.
	I got to comment on that.
	Just floating a theory here.
	You know, there's no way that all of these refugees are, you know, evil stabber folks, but the fact that they don't address that problem accurately leaves you to think that when you see somebody in the streets that looks like the people that have been stabbing everybody, because they're not addressing that problem, you're just kind of forced to be like, you know, I don't trust you.
	Well, maybe they're doing it with blacks in America, too.
	That's right.
	You know, they're not catching the bad guys.
	George Floyd wasn't a good guy.
	So you just think you're surrounded by the- I don't know who's a good guy or a bad guy.
	Now I want to get away from all of you.
	That's why it's a silent apartheid.
	Perfect chaos.
	Country's split now.
	They don't want to come back.
	All right.
	Let's end this with some anti-maskers.
	It's kind of a cool new thing that is probably going to annoy you, but I'm all for it.
	These are people fucking up everything because they won't wear a mask.
	So go to the first one there.
	This is back in our notes under anti-maskers.
	Oh, gotcha.
	Roberto Duran, no mask.
	I'm going to go full screen on his mug.
	Yeah, so she was told that she couldn't get her groceries because she wasn't wearing a mask.
	And this is going to look to you like some stupid bitch.
	And that was my instinct, too, when I first saw it.
	And then I thought, the pandemic's been disproven.
	This is just ridiculous at this point.
	At this time of the year, after all of this, play it.
	I'm a dumbass man, fucking asshole.
	I'm a dumbass man, fucking asshole.
	I'm a dumbass man, fucking dog.
	Like, we have the same, I have the same instincts as you.
	I'm like, you stupid bitch.
	Sock, spoiled brat.
	More people need to be doing this.
	Because I know my grandchildren asked me about this, and they'll say, so everyone just complied?
	Yeah, everyone just put on the mask.
	They thought it's easier than not.
	So no one fought back.
	No one said, fuck you.
	This is called, as the dead milkman put it, a fuck-off attitude.
	Okay, we got one more, then we'll have to go.
	way over.
	So she was told to put...
	Yeah, they wouldn't.
	Okay.
	Yeah.
	So she didn't have a mask.
	Yes.
	They said, put on a mask or we can't serve you.
	It is enraging when that happens.
	Now, this one's really going to piss you off.
	And I felt the same way because this guy refused to wear a mask on the plane.
	And they ended up shutting the whole flight down.
	Now, sometimes I carry around a mask and I'm like, I want to get in the store.
	I got to get it.
	It's fucking dumb.
	Sometimes I'll go like this.
	That's my little mini rebellion.
	Or sometimes I'll wait until I get caught.
	But, you know, sometimes you just got to say, fuck it.
	I'm not wearing a mask.
	Now, I know 99% of the population goes, this asshole.
	This wasn't the hill to die on.
	They had to de-plane the flight.
	You can play.
	Press play.
	Everyone missed their connections.
	He fucked up their whole day.
	That's terrible.
	But I don't know.
	Maybe some days should get fucked up.
	They're not happy with him.
	It's the guy in the red shirt.
	Wait, is that the black guy?
	Yeah, where aren't the cops?
	Who is this guy talking to him?
	That's the Delta guy.
	That's the Delta guy.
	That's the guy he was arguing with on the plane.
	No, that guy has a mask.
	He was the one that turned for him.
	Boy, that's pretty anticlimactic ending.
	He does, but maybe he wasn't wearing it.
	So was it a black guy?
	Oh, fuck.
	Was that the guy that wasn't wearing a mask?
	Go back to the beginning.
	Guy in the red shirt is not wearing a mask.
	Oh, he won't put it up.
	Yeah, yeah.
	No, no, no.
	He put it on after they said we called the cops.
	I just imagined this to be a fat white guy.
	I didn't expect a black guy to be Mr. Anti-Pandemic.
	But hear me out.
	I know this is counterintuitive thinking, but good.
	Good.
	Don't comply with stupid laws.
	It's un-American.
	Get fired.
	Get in trouble.
	Be brave.

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