Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - GOML LIVE #53 - PARLER IS LIT

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June 26, 2020 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

02:02:50

GOML LIVE #53 - PARLER IS LIT

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	Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McKinnon.
	Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McKinnon.
	Holy shit, I'm strong.
	You see how I pulled that ghetto blaster off the table?
	I did.
	Dude, muscle milk and boxing every day, I'm turning into a beast.
	Although I look like Nad's patient from the neck up.
	And from the neck down, actually.
	Nade's patient is a beast of sorts.
	What do you think of this new edition?
	The fanny pack?
	Yeah.
	Love it.
	I'm a fanny packer.
	I mean, I don't even know if I'm being ironic anymore.
	I'm never being ironic when I wear Fanny.
	You know what?
	When we were kids, like the grunge years as Gen X, we weren't really being ironic when we were being ironic.
	Like we go to secondhand clothing stores, which my generation basically invented.
	My generation invented the whole grunge thing of not having brand names, not needing a Nike swoosh on your shirt.
	Military looking gear, like that.
	Yeah, all that used clothing stuff.
	That was us.
	You're welcome for that.
	But if we saw a shirt that said like Jesus camp, sleep at your best, and it had a little kid sleeping with a big giant cross and had Jesus looking down, you'd wear that shirt and you weren't really like, ha ha.
	You weren't really Christian.
	I'm not going to pretend it was like an ode to Christianity, but it wasn't really ha ha.
	It was just sort of like, here's a weird shirt.
	Yeah.
	You know what I mean?
	A weirdness.
	Like you might as well have a baseball hat that said Korean burgers.
	It was just like, here's a thing.
	I found like a weird feather in the jungle and I put it in my hat.
	What do you think about me getting Crocs?
	You should also, if you're going to get Crocs, I would suggest you work on your resume.
	You're saying that I'd be fired from here.
	Yes, instantaneously.
	I actually don't even think there'd be a question.
	It would be like if you worked at a gay conversion place and you showed up sucking a dick.
	We'd be like, well, you're done.
	I assume you knew that.
	You can't just come in here and say F you to everybody.
	Is this lighting right?
	It seems a little dim.
	And for some reason, the host looks really old.
	Like, look at this.
	I notice I can see these wrinkles in my eyes more than ever before.
	That shouldn't be a thing.
	Tucker and Hannity are older than me.
	They look like spring chickens.
	Nope.
	Get off my lawn, says Mr. Burns.
	Whatever happened to those commercials we did?
	Remember those?
	Which ones?
	We did a bunch of Get Off My Lawn.
	Oh, that was only for.
	We spliced Get Off My Lawn from Gran Torino.
	Yeah, that was for CR TV, though.
	Correct?
	But where did those ever go?
	I guess we could repurpose them.
	Remember, they were on YouTube.
	That was fucking awesome.
	People were like, dude, I just saw you on YouTube.
	You remember that?
	We can reshoot them, I guess.
	But do you have them on any hard drive somewhere?
	Yeah, I think I could find them.
	Let me see.
	Because one of them was when he used to be going, get off my lawn.
	And then I go, no, you get off my lawn.
	And then he goes, we used to stack you gooks nine foot high.
	Use you as body bags.
	No, use your bags, your bodies as like sandbags.
	And I was like, what the fuck are you talking about?
	Just get off my lawn.
	You were in Korea?
	You were in the war?
	Yeah.
	Before we get started with the show, I think it's very important to announce that I am quitting YouTube.
	After being perma-banned, I decided that it would be in my best interest to permanently quit the platform to never return.
	So I'm done.
	You know, I made some mistakes in the past.
	I understand that their terms of service is broad, and I don't want to try to kowtow to that.
	So, as of only three days after YouTube permanently banning me forever, I'm done.
	Fuck you, YouTube.
	You can't fire me.
	I quit.
	I'd like to tell you about something called Express VPN.
	Now, we're living in crazy times.
	Censorship is rampant.
	I came up with this name, censored.tv, after free speech.tv had been censored.
	We are constantly, I had to spend so much time, I should say my tech guy, had to spend so much time hack-proofing censored.tv.
	It took forever.
	And I'm reluctant to even say that because hackers see that as kind of a challenge.
	But why do we have to do all this?
	Because we're not living in a free time anymore.
	We're not living in a First Amendment America.
	We're not living in a First Amendment world.
	So this episode is brought to you by expressvpn.com forward slash gavin.
	Why should you be using expressvpn.com forward slash gavin?
	Because sensor.tv uses expressvpn.com forward slash gavin.
	And because we've all searched things we don't want other people seeing.
	Well, I don't know about that.
	I don't want them knowing where I shop.
	I'm not looking at porn.
	Instinctively, we go to incognito mode, but it really doesn't hide your web activity.
	Your internet service provider can still see every single website you visited.
	That's why we're using expressvpn.com forward slash gavin.
	Protect your online activity today with the VPN rated number one by CNET and Wired.
	Visit my exclusive link.
	That's expressvpn.com forward slash gavin and get an extra three months free from sensor.tv.
	It does not matter if you're using Verizon, Comcast, whatever.
	ExpressVPN keeps all of your information secure by encrypting 100% of your data.
	Expressvpn.com forward slash Gavin.
	Three months free VPN.
	ExpressVPN.com/Gavin.
	And also I think the people that can't watch our stuff and remember they were banning us like news.
	So, Sky News and I think Virgin has banned us in certain places like New Zealand and parts of Britain where people have paid their money to watch a private show.
	Nobody's beeswapped.
	These guys can watch the most disgusting porn on earth.
	They can watch snuff films.
	They can watch people eating live mice.
	They can watch ISIS videos, ISIS beheadings.
	They can subscribe to jihadist networks, but you cannot watch censored TV.
	So if these people use ExpressVPN, they can watch our network.
	It's crazy that this show is considered so controversial.
	The number one solution to watching stuff that's not available in your country, VPN.
	I'll tell you what, if I was, because I remember in the 90s when we started Vice, we were into the craziest shit.
	In fact, I was in a band called Leather Ass Buttfuck, and we got that name from we were in Amsterdam, and we went up to one of these porn shops, and we're like, what's your worst, craziest thing?
	And they're like, well, we have this, it's got woman being spankenschlampent and funchened, and then there's a lady going pee.
	And we're like, no, no, no.
	I want like, you could get fired for telling me about this.
	You have to go to the back room.
	And the guy was like, all right, I do have something, but it's $15, which when you're a 24-year-old is paying $15 for a magazine is the craziest thing you've ever heard.
	And we're like, I'm in.
	Just for fun, you know, it's not like we were dying for porn.
	So he goes to the back and he comes in a sealed silver laminate bag.
	You can't look in it.
	$15.
	And I'm like, I hope this isn't kiddie porn or someone being murdered.
	So we pay for it and we get it and we go outside.
	Don't open that in here.
	I don't want people seeing that you can get this level of insane intensity.
	So we go, okay.
	We're about to throw it out, by the way.
	It's not like we're going to keep it.
	So we open it up and the magazine, all one word, leather-ass buttfuck.
	And so it's a gay mag with a bunch of dudes just like leather, all wearing leather, spanking each other and fornicating and just a leather gay mag.
	Well, that's nice.
	This sounds very gay.
	There goes my 15 bucks.
	An expensive prank on you.
	But so if I was like, because this is back in the early 90s, there was a thing called hate literature, and it wasn't racist or anything semantic.
	It was just like serial killer trading cards.
	Jim Gold was sort of the president of this type of literature.
	Answer me was his magazine, but there was a magazine called Fucked, F-U-K-T.
	Sewer Kunt was a big one that was from Sweden.
	And it was just like, it's hard to explain to this generation, this day and age, but it was just like Jeffrey Dahmer's favorite records.
	It was just like, you know what I mean?
	Yeah, just filthy.
	It's like gross.
	Filth.
	Yeah.
	And not gross in the sense that like, here's the rarest, youngest porn you can find.
	It was more just like trivializing death.
	And like, for example, Debbie Goad worked at a suicide hotline and encouraged people to kill themselves.
	So it was just sinister.
	It's kind of like Crack Magazine.
	You remember that?
	It's like Mad Magazine, but just a little filthier.
	Never heard of that.
	Freeze.
	Freeze.
	Are you.
	You're stunned that I asked you if you knew what Cracked Magazine was.
	No, I am floored like Nagasaki that you think I'm talking about fucking cracked magazine.
	I'm talking about people with their heads cut off.
	I'm talking about like an interview with a cannibal.
	And you're talking about a mad magazine ripoff that was just exactly the same as Mad Magazine.
	Jesus.
	H. Christ.
	Ryan, do not contribute to the conversation if you have nothing.
	Look up Sewer Cunt.
	I tried.
	Yeah, it's probably banned.
	There's Faces of Death.
	Yeah.
	Okay, thanks.
	I'm familiar with Faces of Fucking Death.
	Cracked magazine.
	Folks at home who are my age, can you believe what just happened live on the show?
	I'm talking about the darkest literature ever created, which sometimes got so dark, I was like, I'm out.
	Like, Boyd Rice.
	I can't handle it.
	And he's like, what about that cartoon cracked where the guy was like, blech?
	Wow.
	Anyway, that was one for the record, dude.
	Just to sort of clarify who I work with here, Ryan was going to get milkshakes at a local diner.
	And he said, you want a milkshake?
	I go, what am I, 10?
	No, I don't eat ice cream.
	I don't have candy bars.
	I don't get a milkshake.
	What adult male gets a milkshake?
	You're tasty.
	Oh, I like when you put M ⁇ Ms in it.
	No, I don't.
	Do you also trick-or-treat?
	What was your costume last year?
	What were you?
	fag.
	I was...
	I helped you scare children.
	Yes.
	I was a zomb.
	A zomb.
	Anyway, so he, I guess I send my text.
	I go, no, I don't want to fuck it.
	I don't need candy.
	A male, an adult male.
	But he got the thing too late.
	So he comes back to the studio and he's like, there's your shake.
	I don't.
	To me, that's a pacifier or it's a pedialite.
	Like it's for fucking babies.
	All these guys, even you assholes who have your Dunkin' Donut super coffees with the foam.
	I don't like the foam.
	You know you're a fat chick, right?
	Like, you know what you're eating.
	You're eating a milkshake for young fat women, Like 15-year-old fatties.
	That's what you are.
	If you eat that, what do you swirl it around?
	So, anyway, I'm disgusted.
	And I go, get this out of here, put it in the studio fridge.
	And then he goes, well, that's a waste.
	So he puts it in the freezer because he thinks I'll probably want it in a couple days.
	And this is a couple days.
	We've arrived at a couple days.
	So he took it out at about, I'm going to guess, what, 6 p.m.?
	A little later.
	Okay.
	So a little too late.
	7 p.m.
	It's not defrosted.
	He puts it on the counter.
	He's like, let's let that defrost and I can have a delicious children's treat.
	Sure.
	You're basically E.T. You like Reese's pieces.
	I like a nice sweet treat every now and then.
	Anyway, so I'm in the kitchen.
	It's not really a kitchen.
	It's just like a fridge and a counter.
	And I go, that's my milkshake?
	He goes, yeah, yeah.
	I just froze it and then I'm going to thawed it out a little bit.
	He's always really enthusiastic about his bullshit.
	It's like, yeah, yeah.
	I stepped on a rat and I'm going to see if it stinks in a few days.
	It's usually hemorrhaging blood because it ate rat poison.
	So we'll see what happens and I'll clean it up.
	I'm invested in my own blood.
	I've got a rat feces around here.
	So I knew he was nearby.
	So he saw him and he goes, not sure it's ready.
	And this is the whole point of this story.
	He squeezes it, right?
	Not sure it's ready.
	And then he goes like this.
	Who the fuck sniffs a milkshake?
	What do you expect to smell?
	Rotten jizz?
	What is going to be in the milkshake that stinks?
	They don't go bad.
	They're frozen.
	Well, the thing is...
	Like, even if it was warm milk, if it was warm milks that was sat on the counter for the past two days, it still wouldn't go bad.
	Oh, no, no, no.
	Oh, no, no, no.
	That wouldn't go bad, of course.
	No, that would not go bad, of course.
	Remember Maniscalco talking about the ice cubes smell like vegetables?
	I mean, what is worried it would smell of the freezer?
	Well, yeah, that freezer, that chemically freezered frayon stuff.
	Anyway, sorry.
	I feel like Billy Connolly here.
	That was a million tangents to get back to.
	If I was a weirdo who was into like the latest, weirdest, coolest, what's the most banned thing, what can I not see?
	Not see.
	You can not see Nazis.
	Who has a Pifty?
	Pifty, of course, is the egot of band.
	PayPal, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, YouTube.
	I have a Pifty.
	I have the egot.
	And then you paid the money, you saw this show, and you went, what?
	Can he at least be racist?
	What the fuck?
	This is the most banned man in America?
	This is lame.
	Yeah, I agree with you, dude.
	America is at, I don't want to say America is lame, but America is at a lame point.
	But before we get to the pifties, I cannot recommend enough Blue Chew.
	This episode is brought to you by Blue Chew.
	Do you need a little extra oomph in the bedroom?
	Then you need Blue Chew.
	Is your girlfriend constantly bitching, making you limp like Linguini?
	Dude, I'm not reading these anymore.
	You gotta not write these.
	Like, actually, your girlfriend bitching, I think, would kind of turn you on a little bit.
	It's your girlfriend not giving a fuck whether you're home or not and watching Real Housewives on her laptop alone in her room.
	That's the linguine.
	But go to bluechew.com.
	This is, I'm not sure I'm allowed to say this, but it's all the active ingredients of Viagra, but for a fraction of the price.
	You go to bluechew.com, use promo code Gavin.
	Your first order is free.
	Just pay $5 shipping.
	No embarrassing doctor visits.
	www.
	in case you're 89 years old and you don't understand that www.just automatically does it when you type it in a URL Vincent bluechew.com promo code Gavin bluechew.com promo code Gavin and I've said this every time I talk about this thing if you're single you should always have it in your wallet for emergencies you might do a little too much hokey pokey I don't know and you might have trouble getting hokey pokey that's when you bring in the big guns
	or if you're married no no no no what are you doing okay if you're married and you finally get a night finally get an opening the kids are finally gone or asleep and something's not working for you you need to have this you know what it's like it's like um what's that thing called an alternator what do you have a generator like in in my house when the power goes out I spent a fortune like 13 grand on this
	giant fridge that's next to my house and as soon as the power goes out there's a thing in the fuse box that goes click and just goes and we can our power can never go out I have a backup I have a plan B by the way Anthony's fucking backup is literally the size of the studio he can still heat his pool I'm not exaggerating yeah no he's talked about it for it's his big years like if if
	you lived in Manhattan in the east village and someone offered you an apartment the size of the generator for his house you'd go yes yeah I'm rich you would be jazzed this is a great like three three grand a month it's absolutely it's it's the size of our studio yeah so I think it's good for him for like three weeks or something and then he goes after that I would just rob people with a gun for propane um all right speaking of being banned I want to put
	together a chart of
	a sort of a hierarchy of bannedness now i'm sure there's an egot chart look that up e-g-o-t chart where they have like john chrissy teigen's husband i think has one whoopie goldberg has one what's that now so egot is a noun right you are an egot if you have won all these things uh I don't know, but this is how long it took them to get that.
	So, so who are those?
	Are all those egots?
	Yes.
	I don't like the way they did that chart, but I get it.
	Okay.
	So, I think Pifty is much smaller than that.
	Mel Brooks?
	What a weird combination of names.
	Are they all Jewish?
	Who the hell is Robert Lopez?
	Who's Robert Lopez?
	Who's Robert Lopez?
	Robert Lopez, if you're watching, please call in during the call-in session.
	Who are you?
	Who the fuck?
	He won all things?
	Oh, he's probably a composer.
	Yeah.
	Good work, Rob.
	My giggle is probably the same thing.
	There's a tick crawling on the ceiling.
	That might be what gave you line.
	I'll take care of that.
	So you're a weird homo about bugs, right?
	No, that's not a tick.
	If it's a tick, we have to prevent anybody from getting hurt.
	Anyway, so all I can think of who has a pifty is Laura Loomer, Enrique Tario, Alex Jones.
	And it's kind of hard to ask people because some people, like Roger Stone, I don't know if he's tried to have a YouTube channel.
	So luckily, I know most of these people.
	I'm going to be texting them over the course of the next week or so, the weekend, and say, are you banned from YouTube or you just don't have a YouTube?
	Because I think Milo is an ift.
	I think he's only been banned from Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter.
	I thought he was a puff.
	That's what's fun about Pifty.
	Ifty sounds funny, ift sounds funny.
	So we'll have a chart, a Pifty chart.
	But as far as I know, because PayPal is the ultimate jewel, being banned from YouTube is easy.
	But being banned from a payment system where you can pay your rent live.
	They don't want your money.
	It's dirty.
	And what about the banks, too?
	Because you got fucking...
	Yep.
	So is it Piftaba?
	No, no, that counts as PayPal.
	PayPal sort of counts as banking.
	I'm going to say.
	Soon you're going to have to add cell phone carriers in there.
	In other news?
	I fought a giant beast today at the gym, and it is the worst thing in the world.
	Do you know why?
	Why?
	Not because they punch you, but because the only way you could not get punched by a beast is to just be constantly punching him.
	So it's the most exhausting thing imaginable.
	Like I told you, I bring a Home Depot bucket full of ice and I put water in it to dip my head in because I can't handle these temperatures.
	But fighting someone, like the big guys, what they do is they just, they wear you out and they block all the punches and wait for the one time to give you the big Deontay Wilder super punch.
	I don't want that, obviously.
	So I just keep going, oh, blah, blah, blah.
	It's sort of like getting laid.
	You're just talking, talking, talking, talking, talking, talking, talking, ticking, hoping they don't notice that you have a boner.
	And I did have a boner in the ring today.
	All right.
	Should we start the show?
	It's kind of weird here.
	So this is still going to be on censored YouTube.
	So I'm still careful about what I say, I guess.
	Not that I really give a fuck anymore.
	You know, to be totally honest, I'm 50 years old, 49.9.
	And I started Vice magazine so I could say whatever I want.
	And back in the 90s, back in Answer Me days, we could do the craziest shit, the Vice Guide to Slavery.
	I had an interview with God, all the races I hate.
	Of course, you'd include whites in there.
	And the satire was, you know, palpable.
	You could figure it out.
	Jokes like, women think I'm sexist because they're too stupid to get my jokes.
	Like that, that's a Norm McDonald type of joke that explains itself.
	But in this day and age, you can't do that anymore.
	So Kowtowed, like I started up, it got to Kowtow Town.
	I had to get the hell out of town.
	And then I did, you know, an ad agency and stuff.
	And then I did CRTV.
	And I thought, all right, let's try to be mainstream.
	As one of the guys at CRTV who set it all up said, you want your kids to be able to watch your show.
	And so I tried that for a while.
	And I didn't say fuck even.
	Did not swear.
	You had to bleep every curse.
	Yeah, crowder.
	We were very crowder-esque.
	I remember I let the word cunt slip once.
	My heart was racing.
	What have I done?
	It was crazy.
	And I was just like, I don't want to do that anymore.
	So then we have this, and it's finally our pirate ship.
	We can do whatever we want.
	But on Thursdays, we have to kiss YouTube ass.
	And when I was finally booted, I was sort of like, all right, finally we can chill out and make jokes like women think I'm sexist because they're stupid.
	You know what I mean?
	I've never looked at the censored.tv's YouTube before.
	It's been pretty active lately.
	These counts are pathetic.
	Yeah, a little bit.
	10,000, 2,000, 3,000.
	3,000.
	But you know what?
	Sort by biggest hits.
	Let's see.
	That's all that matters.
	Most popular.
	Half case.
	That's just a sizzle reel, copper case.
	1 million, another quarter million.
	And a couple of people.
	I should talk about Joe Rogan, I guess, more and make fun of celebrities.
	There was a time, look at all this.
	There was a time when they didn't That's interesting.
	They're all from the same time.
	Yeah, exactly.
	10 months ago, 9 months ago, 9 months ago, 8 months ago, 9 months ago, 10 months ago, 8 months ago.
	We started being squished, for sure.
	Yeah.
	So at 10, you're just sort of like, fuck you.
	Yeah.
	It's very disheartening.
	So there's clips from all shows on there for anybody curious.
	Okay.
	So as we get close to the end, and I thought we were banned from podcasts, but we're still on podcasts.
	Like when I'm doing the pifty, you have to sort of draw the line, right?
	Like, I'm not going to include podcasts, I'm not going to include Chase, and I'm not going to include MailChimp, for example, which we're banned from.
	And I believe we're banned from, I'm banned from Pinterest, which is very painful because I love clicking on my favorite socks.
	But check out this video, 1-1.
	Who's Jenna Marbles again?
	She does, like, corny Zoomer comedy, right?
	Yeah, well, she was big back in like Jersey Shore days, kind of.
	Is she pretty or not?
	It's hard to tell with women.
	I don't know.
	I don't know.
	All right, so I get it.
	No, but she might clean up good, you know?
	By the way, dads, if your daughter's wearing that around her neck, she's a slut.
	That's a slut thing.
	Where we are purging ourselves of anything and everything toxic.
	And I'm being requested that I address things that I've done in my past.
	I also get a lot of tweets from people that are saying, like, we love you, you unproblematic queen, which always makes me uncomfortable because no masochism.
	It is pathetic.
	Jesus Christ, maybe it's because America's mostly genetically Germanic and I'm Scottish.
	I just see this fucking constant capitulation as revolting.
	Like Tina Fay and Jimmy Fallon trying to preempt of strike their imminent demise.
	Turn this up.
	And tell me that you would like me to do better or to do something different.
	So everyone is, all these white people are paranoid about someone going back in their past and finding a dumb joke that will be taken out of context because they see someone like Tina Faye, who mocked Blackface, getting a shit for even having blackface existing.
	I want to explain something to you.
	We're going to explain this after the break, after the paywall.
	They don't want your apologies.
	When I say they, I mostly mean BLM and Antifa and the alt-left.
	They don't want your apologies.
	They want revenge.
	They want to hurt you.
	They want separate drinking fountains, but they want them to have the good drinking fountain and you to have the shitty drinking fountain.
	When Lexi Page was taken from her family on the Indian Reunification Act, whatever it's called, because she was 1.2% Native American, and to move her to this family would make that particular family like 1.6 because there was another 1.1 there.
	I said, this is insane.
	You're ripping a girl from her foster parents who love her.
	Those siblings are her siblings.
	And I talked to Indians.
	I forget what the tribe was.
	I don't think it was Cherokee.
	Sue?
	And I said, guys, I managed to get a hold of one who was involved, like remotely involved in the case and was in that same district.
	And she said, basically, like a black woman on her.
	Choctaw.
	Choctaw.
	She said, yeah, this is what we went through all those years.
	And I was like, okay, I get it.
	Stab me.
	Like, put cigarettes out in my eyes if you want revenge.
	This girl's four.
	And then she wouldn't call me back because it wasn't about justice.
	It's about revenge.
	So you see this in Israel too with the Palestinians.
	They don't want a beautiful, equitable relationship with Israel.
	They want to be Israel.
	They want to kick all the Jews out and sit there in their chairs and have their world and then have the Jews outside and in Palestine.
	They want to switch places.
	That's what this is about.
	And we saw this in South Africa where they said, I want that.
	I want your farm.
	Okay, here.
	And then the farm deteriorates.
	So this woman is basically giving up her content farm.
	And I promise you, no one will pick up the slack and it'll just be less farming on YouTube.
	You stupid bitch.
	I try to do that.
	And I try to make fun content, inclusive content, things that don't offend people or upset people.
	And that's kind of where I am.
	Can we just see her most popular video?
	Because I'm old.
	And young queers like you probably are.
	I've never gotten a job.
	Jenna is awesome.
	How can you not know the time she went and she got a milkshake and then she froze it and thawed it out and smelled at?
	I don't know.
	I bet her top video is like a billion views.
	Yeah, she was big back in the day.
	She used to be like a...
	Oh, just 69 million views.
	How to trick people into thinking about it.
	Hello there, friend.
	And welcome to my tutorial.
	Racist.
	I would trick people into thinking you're really good looking.
	If you were born really ugly like me, have no fear.
	There's steps you can take to be good looking, kind of.
	I've already taken some steps before we even start.
	I've bleached the absolute shit out of my hair, and I tan my skin.
	I'm really going to pull that off.
	So it's very sort of mediocre, good, clean, like fun, like Nickelodeon jokes.
	Yeah.
	With the odd swear word.
	Silly dancing and stuff like that.
	I remember there was some dance.
	Do you keep going with that?
	Fucker.
	So there you have it, tricking people into thinking that you're good looking when you're really just a fucking weirdo.
	I realize that this video is not helpful to men, You're just going to have to find a girl that thinks you're funny.
	Great.
	Standard meat and potatoes comedy.
	And the mob came after her.
	All right.
	So we're going to get more into Black Lives Matter and the mob and how dangerous they can be and what went on in Brixton last night where they attacked the police and then got mad at the police for not coming back when they were stabbing each other.
	But that's for people who pay.
	And soon, I imagine, this will only be behind the paywall and I won't have to differentiate.
	But in the post-roll giveaway, Meaning, after we cut the cord here, we will be having some pretty insane giveaways involving Johnny Apple CBD.
	I want to give a shout out to Johnny Apple CBD, by the way.
	They were there for us from the very beginning.
	Also, johnnyapple.com, both work.
	They're for Patriots of Free Speech CBD.
	Johnny Apple CBD is my CBD right now.
	All of my listeners get 20% off all orders.
	Go to jacbd.com.
	Enter promo code Gavin.
	Get 20% off.
	JACBD.com.
	Promo code Gavin, 20% off.
	And tonight, the first four listeners to email an Express VPN signup confirmation form, and that's at expressvpn forward slash Gavin.
	The first four listeners to sign up for ExpressVPN and send proof of their confirmation.
	I guess that could just be called confirmation, to mailbag at censored.tv, get a loot crate and a box of meat sticks.
	Obviously, this only pertains to subscribers.
	So I shouldn't have said that until we were behind the paywall.
	All right, kitties.
	One of our fans posted that they got the meat sticks.
	It was like a bunch of them.
	They look great.
	So I was like, can you send me some of those meat snakes?
	What?
	Why would you ask someone for their food?
	No, not the fan.
	I asked our advertiser guy.
	Oh, I was like, you got some meat snakes?
	Get fired.
	Get in trouble.
	Be brave.
	And never stop fighting.
	We'll see you next time.
	The marathon.
	Brian's like, okay, we got 34 seconds for the music.
	Why?
	Because that song's so important.
	Dems the rules.
	By the way, I had an important thought today.
	So the guy who made me that music, he has a cafe down in California.
	And he said, yeah, my employees found out I'm a proud boy.
	They're thinking of quitting.
	And that worked itself out.
	But then he said, some woman's coming over and she wants to talk because she's worried about a Dylan Roof type shooting if I'm a fascist or something.
	And that worked itself out.
	And then he said, this is all, by the way, in a week.
	And then he goes, uh-oh, my wife, Jen, is getting kicked out of her book club because we're MAGA.
	And I said to him, what I say to everyone when this kind of shit happens, I think our biggest problem is we put our brains in their brains.
	And we go, no, no, that's not what happened.
	And we assume like they're like us and they're looking for logic and truth and reasoning.
	No, you're talking to a piece of shit.
	Don't waste your time talking to human garbage.
	And I know this sounds classist, like I'm rich and smart and they're poor and dumb.
	Some of my best friends are poor and dumb.
	And I'm a fucking loser when it comes to a million things like cars and guns and that kind of knowledge.
	So I'm not talking about that.
	When I say piece of shit, I just mean someone who is dishonest and doesn't want for everyone to figure it out to get better.
	These people are just shit.
	Like the gremlins like Jared Holt who report on us and try to sabotage our lives and send this quote to this person out of context.
	You can't sit there and go, no, no, no, that quote's out of context.
	No, hey, what did you do?
	They're just like flies.
	They're garbage.
	They've never accomplished anything.
	They'll have no legacy.
	They'll have no children, by the way.
	So I said to him, it's not like I, Gavin, your friend, your peer, I didn't kick Jen out of her book club.
	Some useless cunt did.
	And the only thing your wife should be worried about is her bad judgment to start a book club with flies.
	So it's such a waste of time to sit and try to explain.
	Like, for example, I heard this black guy who was shot in Chaz is now saying it was a proud boy.
	And I go, oh, Jesus, that can't be good.
	I look it up, and it turns out he refused to talk to the police.
	And then one of the guys died.
	They both refused to talk to the police.
	Hold on a second.
	And one of the guys died.
	I was too much of indecence.
	And so then, obviously, Chaz people got in his head.
	And he made a statement to the press today.
	And he goes, yeah, so I was outside of Chaz.
	I wasn't even in Chaz.
	And then I called the police because I'd been shot.
	And they didn't care.
	And the guy I looked up, I couldn't tell if he was KKK or Proud Boys.
	But he shot me.
	He said, fucking nigger.
	Proud Boys or KKK.
	Can't be.
	I couldn't tell if it was a Fred Perry or a cleanie white hat.
	Or what?
	Or Clanhood.
	Yeah.
	Clanhood.
	Yeah, they look so similar.
	And I just look at that and I'm like, like, normally me of a year or two ago, I'd go, what?
	No, no, no.
	Like, that guy.
	And I'd want to explain it to people.
	Like, that guy didn't have a statement before.
	And how do you confuse KKK and Probably?
	What does KKK mean?
	Like a KKK patch?
	Oh, no.
	You know why?
	They're probably like, and by the way, we're...
	But also, he was fading because of his bullet wound.
	Oh, and one thing you should know, that you just got shot by the motherfucking rule.
	God, I couldn't care if I can't remember if it was a p or a k.
	So you just look at that and you laugh.
	And you go, what a fucking dumb liar.
	Another Bubba Wallace, another juicy small A. And there will be people that believe this horse shit.
	And you laugh at them.
	Stop putting your brain.
	Like, I remember when I first moved to New York City in 1999, I'd see bums and I'd go, oh man, that sucks.
	You're homeless and you got dreads and you fucking reek.
	And then I'd be walking around and I'd see like a building where you don't have to buzz to get in.
	And then I'd see a little enclave above a door.
	I was like, you could come here late at night, sleep there, right?
	You could put a little that curtain you could put there and hide there, right?
	No one would see you come in.
	And then after a while, you could wash dishes and you'd get enough money to maybe get a roommate, right?
	You wash up and stuff, cut your hair with your dishes money, and then answer an ad on Craigslist for a roommate, maybe $600 a month, $700 a month.
	Then you could maybe start adding that.
	That could add up.
	Maybe you could have your own apartment eventually.
	And I'm like, I'm just making me the bum.
	He's a bum.
	The flies are flies.
	What are you going to do?
	Explain to them the truth?
	I'm not racist.
	I'm not racist.
	No, it wasn't Proud Boys that shot that guy.
	It wasn't Proud Boys.
	As a friend of mine said, let the dogs yap.
	It really is.
	It didn't have a lot of impact when he said that to me the first time.
	Reporter identifies as a man who assaults him and tried to steal his phone.
	Isn't that the guy who got shot?
	Yeah.
	Andy No identified him as the guy who stole his phone and assaulted him on June 14th.
	And that's when Andy No called the KKK Proud Boys.
	Right.
	He said, I need you to go into Chaz and get revenge.
	Yeah.
	That's the thing.
	I'll describe him.
	He's a black man with short hair.
	Here's another thing they always say.
	They say, Andy No provides kill lists for Adam Woffen.
	Like, that sounds like Chinese to you, and it should, because it's fly talk.
	This is all bzzzzzzzzzz.
	This is how flies talk.
	So Adam Waffen is this esoteric white power group of a bunch of little kids that has had zero impact on society.
	And they've had like three deaths associated with them.
	And two of them have been them getting killed by people, Muslims and shit.
	And the idea that Adam Waffen is looking for people to kill, like a Santa list.
	And they're just like, oh, okay.
	We're in the ends now.
	Andy NGO.
	Okay.
	Can someone kill Andy No?
	How do you know who Andy No is?
	His name was provided to us.
	Kill list?
	Like you're a kid.
	You're playing a video game.
	Remember the quote we talked about the other day?
	Proud boys are going to be in Portland.
	They'll be shooting anyone who looks Mexican or gay.
	Right.
	See, I think another problem is we have way too much access to way too many stupid quotes.
	So I'm talking about flies buzzing around you.
	You usually only see a fly if it's in the room you're in.
	Right now, we're seeing all of the flies in America.
	So we pick up our fly meter and we go, we go, what the fuck's going on?
	I got a lot of fixing to do.
	No, you don't.
	There's just flies.
	Don't waste your fucking time with the flies.
	Enjoy them.
	Have a good laugh.
	Yeah, but at my work, they'll fire me.
	Then get fired.
	Get in trouble.
	My cousin got fired because he was MAGA.
	He's had a new job now.
	It's fucking awesome.
	There was some bitch complaining about the fridge, the lack of variety of snacks.
	They fired her.
	And now the fridge is just beer.
	All different types of beer.
	It all seems to work out.
	Yeah, it'll work out.
	Anyway, also in the news, so Jenna Marbles has quit YouTube just like me.
	We both quit together.
	Holding hands.
	She probably didn't.
	You could quit YouTube after you're banned.
	It's just your way of saying, I'm not coming back.
	I never liked you anyway.
	So Carpe Donkton, we had him on the show this week.
	He was kicked off of Twitter for violating the copyright of a toddler video, which was a black boy and a white boy running towards another.
	And that was a major symbol that shocks the world because it's unfathomable to us that a black kid and a white kid could be friends.
	We've never heard of such a thing.
	So when we see it, we go, what the fuck?
	Shouldn't he be, shouldn't, what the, shouldn't they be stabbing each other?
	Shouldn't the white kid be dragging the black kid behind his pickup truck?
	They can't.
	This is like, remember that commercial where they had the screen, the x-ray screen?
	You got to find that, man.
	It was like, I think it was for a soap, but it was about love knows no boundaries.
	And it was a Macklemore song.
	And they go behind this.
	So they start behind the screen.
	You just see skeletons.
	And then the skeletons go like this.
	And you go, well, the only relationships possible are a white male and a white female.
	Those are the only people that can love, right?
	Yeah, this is it.
	And then they come out from behind the screen and it's like lesbians.
	And you go, wait, what?
	There are lesbians on earth?
	Like, how did I know that word?
	If I'm shocked.
	But one of the most egregious ones was they come out and it's a little girl with Down syndrome and her brother.
	And you're like, wait a minute.
	Are you accusing me of not thinking that a handicapped child deserves love?
	Look at the way they react.
	What the fuck?
	Start throwing tomatoes.
	Can't change.
	See, lesbians can love each other.
	Yay!
	I give a shit.
	I give a shit that lesbians are in love.
	Wait, what's this?
	It's a white male and a white female, right?
	That's the only kind of love there is.
	Wait, whoa, whoa, no, no, no, no, no, no.
	No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
	No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
	You'll notice this too, by the way, when you see mixed race couples that are black and white, especially if it's a black woman and another, they walk down the street holding hands, looking at you like, well, what do you think of this?
	And you're like, I don't fucking care that you're sucking the dick of someone you love.
	You're not brave.
	You're in a relationship.
	Oh, there it is.
	There it is.
	Go back.
	Wait, are they chilling?
	Just go back.
	This makes me physically ill.
	To see Down syndrome people with love?
	Yes.
	They don't deserve love.
	They're retarded.
	They need to be exterminated.
	Yay.
	Oh, that's her sister.
	I love my fucking handicapped sister, and they're blowing our minds.
	Like, it's so insulting to imply that when I see a blind person or I see a handicapped person, I don't think of them as human.
	That's what this campaign is saying.
	Is this aimed towards the devil?
	It's a devil in fucking self?
	It's aimed towards ISIS.
	Like, you want to...
	The only people that have a problem with any of this shit are fucking jihadists.
	Yeah, they would be going...
	Old Asians can be in love?
	That's fake.
	There's no such thing as an old Asian in love.
	Wait, patty cake, patty cake?
	Uh-oh.
	Does one of them have an eye patch?
	One's a midget?
	What are those two?
	I don't know.
	They were just little girls.
	They weren't even handicapped.
	You think I don't think little girls can be friends?
	All right, anyway.
	Oh, man.
	Anyway, that's the whole thing with the toddlers.
	That's three minutes long, too.
	So they had a black toddler and a white toddler running at each other.
	And like, it's supposed to show you that racism can be cured.
	And I find that it's racist because you're implying that that blows my mind.
	Fuck you, by the way.
	It's like a relative of mine said, after Obama was elected, he goes, it's kind of surprised, you know, a country this racist would elect a black president.
	And I just went, fuck you.
	And I don't even, I was barely American at the time, right?
	I just moved here eight years previous, but I was insulted as an American that you think we can't handle a black president.
	We're not racist.
	Racism isn't a thing.
	Stop shoving it up our fucking ass, please.
	So anyway, black kid, white kid.
	So Carpe dunked him, got the joke, and he said, this is fucking stupid.
	So he said, he mocked their nefarious intentions.
	Because as I just wasted a lot of time explaining, making that go viral is essentially calling you racist.
	It's essentially saying you think this is a big deal.
	And it's some racist who probably has never seen black kids and white kids hang out together.
	It's probably shocked themselves by it.
	They go, you shouldn't be shocked by this.
	It happens.
	And you better accept it.
	It's actually beautiful.
	Look, they're hugging.
	You got a problem with that?
	No, nobody does shit for brains.
	So Carpe changes it and he makes it into a racist baby.
	And we showed it on the show the other day, right?
	He takes the end and puts it at the beginning.
	He says, racist baby attacking.
	And so he's banned from Twitter.
	And that was all this.
	But now they're going farther.
	Now, what is it now?
	Clicked on the original Zero Hedge thing?
	Parents of toddlers in viral video to sue Trump and Carpe Donctum over the meme.
	Because I guess Trump forwarded it.
	Yeah, he retweeted it.
	Yep.
	Okay, so peak clown world is now the dumbest thing to say ever.
	That's like being in the fires of Nagasaki.
	I'm using a lot of Nagasaki things and say, hot enough for you?
	Like, there's no work.
	There's no peak.
	We're in a thunderstorm.
	We're in a tornado.
	You can't say this is as windy as it's going to get.
	Good news.
	What?
	As of two hours ago, Carpe says, on parlor, he parlayed, I've retained Ron Coleman as my attorney.
	And in regards to legal matters, he will accept any and all service on my behalf.
	So let it be written, let it be done.
	Oh, cool.
	We're the same lawyer.
	Isn't it funny how there's this war on such a small group of people and we all know them?
	Like I talked to Carpe today.
	I talked to Ron Coleman today.
	I talked to James O'Keefe today.
	I talked to fucking Glenn Beck today.
	Speaking of James O'Keefe, he sent me this little, I talked to Dinesh today.
	So he went undercover on Facebook, in Facebook, at Facebook.
	And well, I'll let him explain.
	Hello, everyone.
	We have breaking news at Project Correct Tas after our Facebook investigation.
	A senior HR business partner at Facebook, Leslie Brown, has just been fired.
	Leslie Brown sent me a text message saying, quote, I've now been fired.
	This is Leslie's LinkedIn page.
	She was working for Facebook as a senior human resource business partner.
	And over there, US Tech Solutions is the name of the contractor she was working through.
	I've contacted US Tech Solutions.
	I spoke to their CEO, a man named Minaj Agawal, CEO, and he told me he cannot talk about his clients, his NDAs, but he did tell me on the phone when I spoke to him that it was the decision of the client to do this.
	So apparently it was Facebook's decision.
	We have reached out to Facebook.
	They have, in fact, given us a comment, but not related to Leslie Brown.
	And Facebook's comment was, quote, the comments made are not consistent with our policies.
	They were reviewing training and oversight.
	So someone has been terminated.
	Let's take a look at what she said.
	This is Leslie Brown talking about white people and how they're treated.
	Specifically James.
	Just pause.
	That's a very cool setup he's got there.
	I was thinking this.
	It looks like Shep Smith, but it probably cost, it's just an office with a bunch of monitors.
	But it has the same quality as Shep Smith with his stupid gigantic iPads everywhere.
	I think he's canceled, isn't he?
	He started hating Fox and everyone.
	Yeah, remember his set?
	It's all gigantic iPads.
	All right, go back to James O'Keefe there.
	Wow.
	Yeah, look at that.
	That's maniacal.
	It looks stupid.
	That's retarded.
	It just looks like an Apple store.
	Intelligence, right, right.
	Yeah, so it's a white man, right?
	Yeah.
	Yeah, white man, so no problem.
	He can't do it that easily if there are other issues.
	Oh, it's easier when they're.
	White men.
	Okay.
	Yeah, no one's actually told.
	Yeah, no one's no one's, yeah.
	No one has the white men's back anymore.
	So this is the quote that I think.
	You know what I think's great about that?
	She wasn't saying that's good or bad.
	So if the boss, the affirmative action hire, Meen Hajj, had any gumption or honor or character or anything, he'd say, she was saying an unfortunate truth, but that's the way it is.
	It's very easy to fire white men, but it's very difficult to fire gays or anyone else.
	That's just a hate fact.
	Sorry.
	And she's fired for that.
	Good.
	Good.
	But Gavin, it was an unjust firing.
	Yeah.
	But Gavin, they're talking about firing Jimmy Kimmel for jokes that weren't even racist.
	Yeah.
	Good.
	Fire Jimmy Kimmel.
	Fire her.
	Fire Jimmy Fallon.
	Fire them all.
	That's the only way.
	I'm stealing this from Milo, but he's right.
	This won't change until they fire Ben Shapiro and Dave Rubin and the moderates.
	Firing the alleged radicals like me don't matter.
	Dinesh sent me this thing the other day, and again, I didn't have the courage to tell him about the toad piece.
	We talked about other stuff.
	I said, this looks like a fantastic movie.
	Unfortunately, the Zoomer Groupers are obsessed with demographics, and they don't really care about socialism.
	They think that's a distraction.
	I said, why can't it be both?
	Why can't you see the idea of America totally changing its demographics and also socialism as bad things?
	And he didn't respond, and I didn't bring up the doad.
	I feel like I'm a toad.
	He confides in you and tells you that.
	Gavin, I have to tell you something.
	What if you call me?
	He's like, you know, the reason I use that doad analogy is because I actually do feel like I'm a toad.
	That's crazy.
	Dinesh thinks he's a toad.
	And I was throwing it out there to see if you guys would think I was crazy if you saw me.
	And clearly.
	Spreading my legs in a swamp, jumping around.
	I would pay so much money for that to see that.
	Well, it's my 50th birthday soon.
	I can ask for pretty much anything.
	He flops out of a cake.
	I want Dinesh D'Souza to jump around in a swamp nude and say he's a toad.
	Actually, I said to my wife, she's like, okay, so we could do this and then we could go to that place and then we could have a boat.
	We could rent a boat or something.
	And then we could even go to Scotland or if there's a travel ban.
	And I was like, do you want me to be honest?
	She's like, tell me what you want.
	I go, I would like to rent my local dive bar, free booze for everyone, have like 40 of my male friends, no woman allowed, and just four girls in bikinis and high-heel shoes walking around with sausage rolls.
	They're not strippers or anything.
	Sausage rolls?
	And she's like, you have hurt me today.
	You have hurt me today.
	But I go, that's not infidelity.
	It's not like tune-in Tokyo.
	They're just eye candy.
	I don't like the butt chick.
	It won't be butt chick.
	It's not like you're going to.
	Let me fuck you with my heels off.
	Yeah.
	I couldn't...
	Like, fucking them would be the weirdest, grossest thing.
	That would be so...
	I simply ain't that straight.
	This is not Bushwick.
	Did I tell you one time my buddy went to a bachelor party in Bushwick and it was all black dudes and they were lining up.
	They were in a lineup of maybe 12 guys and there was a big fat black woman lying back on the tile floor and there was just, I think she may have had a towel underneath her.
	I'm not sure.
	And they're just guys lining up, fucking her, and then moving on, fucking her, moving on, fucking her, moving on.
	Lining up like they were there to get a thawed out milkshake.
	What?
	I would definitely smell that first.
	Romance.
	I felt ugly.
	I felt gay.
	I also confided in her that I don't really care.
	Like women, their 50th, their 40th, the 20th anniversary.
	They have all these plans.
	But men, I don't really give a shit about my fucking birthday.
	What am I?
	10?
	So look at the new Dinesh D'Souza video movie.
	This is a trailer.
	When is it out?
	August 7th.
	A Tampa Bay pastor has been arrested for violating coronavirus social distancing rules.
	We will shut you down.
	Do you know that Dinesh D'Souza and Michael Moore are neck and neck for top most watched documentaries of all time?
	Nobody knows this.
	They assume it's Michael Moore and then Dinesh D'Souza down with the slugs.
	Dinesh has like, it's like Michael Moore has the number one spot and Dinesh has the number two and three spot.
	It's something like that.
	He had a movie in the fucking theaters.
	In the fucking theaters, dude.
	What about Hillary?
	We continue?
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	We will arrest you and we will take you.
	Now that's the mayor of Chicago, right?
	What happened to that woman?
	Look her up.
	What do you mean?
	She was an attractive woman and we turned her into something out of Betelgeuse.
	Not the whack pack, but the movie.
	What have we done to this woman?
	She is hideous.
	It's too much of indecence.
	What's her name?
	Lightfoot.
	Lightfoot.
	That's such a fake Indian name.
	But look at her like a few years ago.
	Oh, yeah, because she got a little more full in the face.
	Oh, wow.
	She looks like a person.
	Look at that one.
	Yeah, that one.
	You're like, okay, you're like a nice black mom.
	And then, yeah, the eyes became sucked.
	You know, she dropped the glass four hours of sleep a night.
	Look at this.
	She looks like a torture victim.
	It looks like she's been rescued from ISIS after four weeks in a cave.
	She's alive.
	Thank God.
	It looks like one of the creatures from the new Star Wars, like the prequels.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	That woman with the asshole eyes.
	Yeah, that's exactly the one.
	She's like, I don't really know.
	That woman.
	There she is.
	She's still a human there.
	Yeah, what happened?
	It's the eye.
	Look at that.
	Look at that.
	She turned into Star Wars.
	Well, look at, you know, Sharpton.
	Before he lost the weight, he looked better.
	All right, we're not doing this.
	Okay.
	Everyone's seen before and after Sharpton's.
	It looks like a gross weirdo now.
	I've got to say that.
	You're also seeing a guy in the 80s and comparing him to a guy now.
	So yes, he looks older.
	And one of her fellow models was dating Al Sharpton a few years ago.
	A few years ago.
	Oh, yeah.
	So she would have been like 21, and he would have been whatever he is, 72.
	Fucking perv.
	Anyway, go back to Beetlejuice.
	You to jail, period.
	Safety groups are turning to drones to monitor public spaces.
	I'm starting to feel like I'm in a communist country.
	Protests turned destructive in downtown Seattle tonight.
	There are certainly aspects of them that are true to a cause.
	That is a good cause.
	It says it right to me.
	I went to the big guys for the money.
	I was ready to prostitute myself.
	The Bidens have done very well, and Joe Biden's been very sophisticated and shrewd in the way he's done it.
	He's essentially offshored the corruption.
	Even in six hours.
	We got to get better cameras, Ryan.
	I want to be able to do like house sit-ins like that.
	What do you mean?
	Let me see.
	Like that one where he's sitting with the guy and he's talking with the Biden's.
	Like that camera.
	We need that quality.
	We could probably change out the lens.
	It'll probably do a lot.
	You need that depth of field.
	Yeah, we need to get, I don't care if they're $2,000 each.
	Very sophisticated and shrewd in the way he's done it.
	He's essentially offshored the corruption.
	And leaving it six hours.
	If the prosecutor's not fired, you're not getting the money.
	Oh, son of a bitch.
	So Trump was on the chopping block for quid pro quo, where he was accused of saying, I'm not going to fund you guys unless you investigate Joe Biden.
	Here is Joe Biden talking about the same fucking country, Ukraine, and saying, drop this investigation or you're not going to get money.
	And people go, that's badass.
	He said, son of a bitch.
	Okay, play.
	Got fire.
	We have to say yes to socialism, to the word and everything.
	We are living in many ways in a socialist society right now.
	Only in America, when the president tweets about liberation, does he mean go back to work?
	I think a lot of people should just say no.
	So beautiful for spacious skies For amber waves of grain Rip that down.
	And by that, I mean Dinesh.
	Moment I looking down, my hands are being put in handcuffs.
	My ankles are shacked.
	Shackled.
	Yeah.
	When you've been shackled so much, you just nickname it.
	Like, I got shacked.
	I think he meant a tall basketball player rammed into his ankles.
	Honestly, I think you should let me run the country.
	He understands that what's at stake is the American dream itself.
	The best is yet to come.
	That looks exciting.
	Hell yeah, brother.
	As exciting as that Uncle Tom movie, which someone snuck me a link to so we can watch that, Together Nude.
	What?
	When I said Together Nude, that wasn't me thinking something and it accidentally falling out of my mouth.
	It was me joking.
	It's just a joke.
	I switched around my camera so it looks like we're facing each other, but I think that was not a Freudian slip.
	That was a joke.
	You should keep it as it was, dude.
	You should keep it flipped the other way.
	It looks better.
	All right, just don't say any naked stuff anymore.
	Naked stuff.
	It's chasing you.
	No.
	Running up dirty hills.
	Naked stuff.
	It's in your pants.
	It's like a spider.
	Running up dirty hills.
	You want to take some calls eventually?
	I got.
	No, I'm not done with my chatting.
	Oh, okay.
	Chaz, BLM.
	Remember we were talking about the Bubba Wallace theme meme, sorry, where it had a mechanic covered in Greece, and it said, Bubba Wallace discovers man in blackface in his garage?
	That's real.
	Ooh, I got some Bubba Wallace gossip, by the way.
	Apparently it's even worse than we think it is.
	Okay, Stop the Insanity, says Cruz.
	Mary Poppins branded racist by U.S. academics over soot scene.
	This is not a joke.
	Independent, like, zoom out a little bit more so people can look it up.
	Independent.co.uk.
	Not a joke.
	By the way, people were covered in soot back then because they didn't have catalytic inverters and there was just dust and garbage and coal everywhere.
	And chimney sweeps would just be black with coal.
	It was a brutal time of incredibly hard work.
	Every streetlight was hand lit and hand put out.
	Men would go down putting out all the streetlights with the little fucking candle dude.
	Yeah.
	That's so weird.
	You know, it's messed up, but like genius is like the people, you know, that are protesting against the system, but it's never the system that gets the brunt of it.
	It's always just the people that had no choice but to like, that was just how people spoke when they said Negro or whatever.
	Well, even, yeah, even like with Jimmy Fallon, not that I don't want him to get fucked.
	Jimmy Fallon was just doing what his contract said, and someone wrote a sketch for him, and he does a good Chris Rock, so they dressed him up.
	And he had to sit there in the makeup chair.
	But I got some goss.
	Apparently, the Bubble Wallace thing is even worse than what we reported.
	They found a garage pole, but that's just because they found a garage pull.
	If there was no garage pulls ever in the history of man, he still would have filed that charge.
	He made up an allegation.
	They assumed it was based on a garage pull, but I don't think it was.
	Now, I'm getting this news from the gym.
	But yeah, I think he just made up a story, totally lazy like Juicy Small A. They saw the garage pull and thought, let's just say it's that.
	Right.
	But I don't think it was that.
	So he didn't even have any physical noose at all?
	No, I think he just went, there's a noose there.
	It was a Proud Boy or KKK.
	Proud Boy KKK noose.
	We should sell nooses.
	Oh my God, no.
	That are called Proud Boy KKK noose.
	No, no, no, no, no.
	But they never come.
	It's just an empty bag.
	They never come.
	We just send them a note that goes, you're a fucking racist.
	Here's your money back, shit dick.
	Is he another half-white just like Jesse too?
	Yeah, but his mom's black.
	Oh.
	Which is weird.
	So I have to get through this.
	We're going to be late for calls, but 1-6, I think this shows you that these people ultimately, with the rioters and the radicals and the Antifa and the BLM, they just want to be heard in a world that isn't listening.
	And I think they make that so clear when they do what we call direct action.
	This is great.
	AHHHHHHHHHH!!
	AHHHHHHHHHH!!
	Is this someone being killed by a deflating balloon?
	Ah!
	You didn't choose the best yeller, did you?
	The guy's not so bad, but she sounds like a balloon.
	This is to the people of Walmart.
	Can you be louder?
	Can you be louder?
	Could you guys be louder?
	Like, if I was organizing this political demonstration.
	And so let me hear your screams first.
	Sorry, Deshaun.
	You're too balloony We need more like You gotta be And then he bows.
	Was that a guy?
	Yeah.
	It looked like a guy.
	Sounded like a woman.
	Okay, so you know how earlier I was saying?
	No one's looking for equality here.
	They're looking for revenge.
	And I don't want to say black people because this is really Antifa BLM, which is like a very small percentage of radical black gays.
	So when I say they, I just mean the rioters.
	And they're not maybe like 48% black.
	But this guy, the Lexi Page thing I was talking about earlier, this guy really sums up what they ultimately want, which is we want to oppress you.
	We want to burn it down.
	And we have nothing to replace it.
	Burn it down.
	You said burn it down.
	It's time.
	So that makes me think that you want to burn it down.
	I said, if this country doesn't give us what we want, then we will burn down this system and replace it.
	All right.
	And I could be speaking figuratively.
	I could be speaking literally.
	It's a matter of interpretation.
	We want to burn it down.
	By the way, parlor, did we talk about this already on the show?
	Parlor is blowing up.
	We didn't mention that.
	We're only going to be showing parlor parlays, they're called.
	Their tweets are called parlies.
	Parlays, yeah?
	Parlies.
	Oh, parleys?
	Yeah.
	I mean, parlor is technically pronounced parlay.
	Right.
	But no one does that.
	So we say parlor, and when you have an individual parlor, it's a parley.
	But yeah, the past two days, it's gone absolutely fucking mental.
	I'm having a blast on it.
	And now when I'm scrolling through it, it just feels like Twitter 10 years ago where you could say anything you want.
	Oh, yeah, we did talk about this.
	I said my woman joke.
	All right.
	Sorry, folks.
	You can now use hashtags and stuff like that.
	I don't know if you were before.
	And then upload videos.
	That's one kind of a flaw, though.
	It's so new that when you do a hashtag, it'll often have nothing related to it because it hasn't accrued enough traction yet.
	You hit a hashtag like blood oranges on Twitter and they've been around for so long, you're going to have a bunch of people talking about blood oranges.
	Nothing there.
	Yeah, we could be the first one.
	That's kind of the exciting part about that right there.
	Yeah.
	Bam.
	First blood orange.
	Say you think blood oranges are lame?
	Go, blood orange, lame.
	I'm going to do that.
	Do it right now.
	Let's show live parlay.
	What's near it?
	So blood orange, lame hashtag, right?
	No, no, no.
	No, no, no.
	Stop.
	Go, anyone hate hashtag blood orange now space the fruit in brackets in brackets as much as me question mark oh that would suck if some blood orange just got on parlor and
	that's the first thing they see that sucks that would be terrible if you if there's a blood orange subscribe or the band I hate cleaning the band blood orange all right so let's look at their demands this is one eight we're almost done here I've got two more links for chaz chaps so this is the demands Center for Multiculture This is how you speak academia.
	Okay, so let me see the bullet points.
	You have to go over my head so I can read them.
	The immediate renaming of buildings on campus that are named after Confederate soldiers and slave owners.
	Yale was a slave owner.
	Princeton, I believe, was a slave owner.
	Actually, it's Yale or Princeton, I'm not sure.
	But anyway, let's get rid of Yale.
	The history of these names, along with the blah, blah, blah, with the names, will not be welcomed.
	I gotcha.
	They're always so verbose here.
	Like, just say the first part.
	We know why you want them removed.
	Number two, make the Harrisonburg JMA police accountable for any actions towards students and will no longer be dismissive of asservations?
	I've never heard that word before.
	You wanted to Google it?
	Asseverations.
	And to say the police have to be held accountable, I thought that was already a thing.
	To asserverate is to declare seriously or positively.
	So as serveration is a declarement of seriousness.
	Declarement?
	A declaration.
	The solemn affirmation of truth of a statement.
	Asservation.
	Okay.
	Sorry.
	I'm dumb.
	That's didactic.
	So these demands are just from that school, but let's keep going.
	Where was the asservation?
	It was number two.
	Okay, there we go.
	Make the blah, blah, blah, no longer be dismissive of aservations.
	Who?
	Asservations.
	Make every space on campus a safe space for black students.
	What does that mean?
	No more lynching rooms?
	Make diversity education such as, and there's some dumb class, a requirement for all students.
	Okay.
	Promote CMSS to incoming students while on tour.
	Oh, fuck off.
	I'm so exhausted with all this shit.
	Have a larger pool of tenured professors of color and more people of color who are qualified to hold positions in departments.
	Yeah, you know how they do that?
	They lower the bar of PhDs.
	Be conscious of where JMU is housing incoming black students along with students of color, as well as who they are randomly, quote unquote, because we know you put us with Nazi skinheads chosen to live with.
	Create and support student.
	All right.
	Visibly increased support for multicultural Greek letter organizations.
	Ah, this is boring.
	Allow students of color to participate in the making of any new policies and the revision of older policies.
	This reminds me of when NYU went on strike and one of their demands was free tuition to Palestinian students, which is code for I want to have a Palestinian friend.
	This is my friend from Gaza.
	He's wearing a kafaya that he actually got in Jordan.
	I wore one.
	He brought me one too.
	We fucking hate Jews.
	It's like eating curry, but you could hang out with it.
	Okay, we'll end this with the best thing on earth.
	And it's Brixton last night.
	They have a spontaneous dance party.
	And as one does, they start shooting each other.
	Oh, no.
	Well, it's not no longer available.
	When did you parlay this?
	This morning.
	There it is.
	That's it there.
	A network error caused the media to fail partway.
	What the heck?
	This is a Tommy thing that you echoed, right?
	Yep.
	He's been banned from parlor.
	I'll try to get to the bottom of it.
	So I'll just tell you the story in case it doesn't load.
	They have a big party in Brixton.
	Brixton is a predominantly black neighborhood.
	All the yardies in the 70s came there.
	That's why you have the clash song, The Guns of Brixton.
	When they kick at your front door, how you gotta come with your hands on your red or on the trigger of your gun?
	And the yardies, the Jamaicans assimilated beautifully.
	Worked out.
	Rocky couple years, but it worked out.
	And so now it's contentious again, because it has to be because we're all about unassimilating.
	And so they have a rave, an illegal rave, whatever, who cares.
	The cops are letting them rave.
	And then there's a shooting that goes on.
	So the cops have to come.
	The cops come.
	And then this was this morning around 9 a.m. for Tommy's timeline.
	What are you doing, dude?
	I thought everything was fine on Parlor.
	11 hours ago.
	And so the police come, but instead of saying thank you for coming, police officers, they start destroying the fucking place.
	This was around 12 hours ago.
	This is what happens with Liza V. Yeah, there you go.
	So they destroy the cupboards.
	So the copper get the fuck out of there.
	And then, I don't think we're going to have to find this video, but it should be next to it.
	Said Britson in big letters on it.
	And then they start stabbing each other after chasing the cops away.
	And so the reaction is, how dare these fucking pigs take so long?
	And she's sitting there going, where are the fucking police?
	My friend's bleeding out.
	He's been stabbed.
	He's been stabbed.
	And there's no fucking police.
	We've been here for almost an hour.
	And she's recording the 911 call saying, he's going to die.
	Where are you?
	Where are the fucking police?
	And you go, that is perfect.
	That is perfect.
	It's a petulant teen who says, I hate it here, Dad.
	Moves out and then...
	Come on, video.
	Video loading.
	Fucking video.
	Thanks.
	Come on, son.
	Come on, Mira.
	Bloody bastard.
	Fucking bastard.
	Fucking hell.
	Anyway, yeah, you get the idea.
	And the dispatcher was saying, we'll get there as soon as we can.
	I'm so sorry.
	So we don't got it?
	Alright.
	So that's the end of our show.
	we will now be taking calls.
	I'll be doing drawings.
	Why don't you show the charitable auctions doodle link?
	So the sense of the TV of course I draw come true.
	You take me, take me, take me on.
	Remember that song?
	Where is that from?
	Simon in the Land of Chalk Drawings.
	And you know my name is True.
	Yeah.
	Oh, that's good money.
	Man, that is very cool.
	And then you know that song?
	Yeah.
	Simon in the Land of Chalk Drawings.
	That was big when I was a little kid in England.
	He would make a chalk drawing and it would come true.
	It's beautiful.
	It's beautiful.
	Wow, this is a lot more Wo-Fi than I remember.
	As told by Bernard Cribbins.
	Fast forward from that version of London.
	go back so yeah Where the fuck?
	Fuck off, police!
	Where the fuck are the police?
	That video that Tommy reposted of that cop, the fake cop, talking about the events of the evening.
	Pretty genius, worth looking at.
	You found a strange figure waiting for him by the fence.
	Simon recognizes it once.
	Why, you're the drawing I did yesterday.
	You didn't finish me.
	You didn't finish me.
	I am indeed, and if you'd be so kind as to complete me, I would like to take you somewhere.
	You look like Simon took a piece of chalk.
	No.
	I drew a police officer, and you erased him, stabbed each other, and then asked me to draw him again.
	I'm not drawing any more police officers.
	Yeah, you seem to not like them very much.
	You don't seem to enjoy it.
	I don't think you chalk drawings know what you want.
	I'm not drawing.
	You just want revenge and fucking chaos, and for me to sew up your fucking knife wounds.
	Well, no.
	I'm done drawing you.
	Hurt people hurt people, but you're not really hurt, are you?
	You know what?
	I'm going to draw from now on cages.
	I'm going to use the slab.
	You better get used to the smell of wormwood scrubs.
	Whoa.
	Yeah, then you'd go to the land of chalk drawings and you'd see all his unfinished drawings.
	A lot of them are pissed off.
	Whoa.
	This is like the premise of monkey bone.
	This is like the premise of monkey bone.
	Remember monkey bone?
	This cartoonist played by cartoonist, played by Brendan Fraser, like gets knocked out.
	He's in a coma, and then he goes to a purgatory thing where all of his creations are there.
	And it's pretty cool.
	Well, he stole it from Simon in the land of chalk jewelry.
	It seems like he did, yeah.
	Show me the Tommy video you were talking about.
	Oh, of course.
	I don't mind denying all these callers their time.
	Let's see.
	Tommy Robinson.
	That reminds me of the song Cop Killer by Body Count.
	I know your mama's grieving.
	Fucker.
	Cop killer, because tonight we get even.
	Amen.
	Thank you.
	He's been real active, Tommy.
	It's pretty cool.
	Hello, I'm Sergeant Constable Detective Officer Peter Pisspot from Twatt Valley Police.
	Many of you will be aware that 22 of my fellow officers were injured during a largely peaceful Black Lives Matter musical gathering in Brixton last night.
	Police were called to the scene by Brixton residents complaining about noise and violence.
	The substantial gathering of revellers was asked by officers to disperse and leave, which they respectfully declined to do.
	Very quickly, more officers arrived at the scene to assist with doing absolutely nothing.
	Several officers were pelted with bottles, although it is not clear whether that was a malicious act or whether revellers were simply trying to share their beverages with police due to the hot weather.
	A number of officers were chased down the street by spirited warnings.
	Fucking guy.
	Tommy thought it was good.
	Yeah, that's one of his 900 parleys today.
	You sure it's called parley?
	Yeah, the word parley has been on your desktop in front of your face as you click on these fucking things.
	Alright.
	So I'd consider that evidence.
	So this will be a big old winner if they prove the VPN thing, right?
	I guess we're not giving out free shit to people.
	But if they confirm they do the VPN thing.
	Well, how are they going to do that?
	Send it to me.
	Yeah, that's a separate thing.
	Oh, okay.
	So we're not doing gifts.
	Mike, no gifts for Mike.
	Sorry, Mike.
	Aww.
	Hey, so you've been talking about cow towing for a while.
	Yep.
	So Nashville has combined the douciest part of their city with the douciest part of our country.
	And a police sergeant in Nashville just released a video of his ballad to George Floyd.
	God is gross.
	So I'm just going to let you guys enjoy that, and I'm going to hang up and watch.
	Okay.
	Thank you for that.
	Thank you for that, Carla.
	You know, that's more gossip I heard of the gym today.
	I heard there's a high-ranking official in the NYPD, a captain or something, who was told, Hey, we're going to need you to at this conference here, we're going to need you to get on your knees and kneel to George Floyd.
	It would look good for everyone involved.
	And he said, Yeah, I'm not going to do that.
	And they go, Well, actually, you have to do that.
	I mean, he goes, 27 years on the force, and I'm taking this moment to say, fuck you.
	And he's retiring.
	He is using that moment to retire.
	Now, he'll still get his pension.
	27 years, you can't not get your pension.
	But it's amazing that after all these years on the force, all these ups and downs, assume David Dinkins, Ed Koch, Bloomberg, Juliani, 9-11, all of this shit.
	And he's like, you know what?
	Fuck you.
	I'm done.
	I'm not kneeling for anyone.
	Ew.
	I'm already puking.
	I cried for you today, but I don't know you.
	I wish that you were.
	He's a mess head porn star who abandoned his children.
	That helps.
	How dare you?
	You forgot fentanyl.
	Okay.
	He's gotten two folded flags, separate occasions, which, you know, Marines with no legs get, or their mothers when they die.
	Maybe a folded bio-dot.
	I bet you those fucking flags are like in a closet somewhere or whatever.
	They sold me.
	I ain't about to shake this off like I don't care.
	Holy shit.
	I'm rattled to the core full of emotion.
	I've watched you on the news in slow motion.
	Those moving images come out.
	We're over you.
	This is the end of uni.
	This video is the end of uni.
	Us and them.
	And you're them, dude.
	I'm angry.
	I'm sad.
	Just pause.
	Just pause too.
	He's saying that it was so unjustified.
	He's a cop.
	We haven't gone through all the evidence yet.
	We're still figuring it out.
	And he's already made a decision.
	So that is he's judge, jury, and executioner at once.
	Like, that's that's a fuck you to all your cop, your fellow cops.
	Take two steps forward and come all unglue.
	I can see red.
	My knuckles are white.
	I'm just trying to get a grip on what happened that night.
	We never wanted this kind of fame.
	We never wanted this kind of family.
	I'm sorry, that's how we know your name.
	Clever.
	No, this kind of thing?
	No, yeah, but I'm sorry.
	I don't like the thing.
	The guy with the neck thing, the guy who died.
	I don't like that thing.
	The breathy preventi?
	That's me thingy?
	That's how mobsters talk.
	Did you take care of that thing?
	Yeah.
	I don't like that thing with you dying on the ground.
	I hate that kind of thing.
	It's a badass room, though, man.
	I'm not surprised by the turnout.
	What do you mean?
	There's no one's there.
	He's sucky.
	He's social distancing.
	Love conquers all.
	What are you talking about?
	Apparently, not obesity thing.
	Unless you're a hateful person.
	So when you see someone on fentanyl and mess using phony money and resisting arrest, you should learn to love.
	It's love.
	You're seen, heard, valued.
	Hate, hate.
	Hate, hate, hate.
	Well, then you hate.
	Right.
	You're using it.
	All right, that's enough.
	What a shizit, shizzo.
	Yeah.
	I'm drawing this motorcycle and it is fucking hard.
	Which is why this drawing fucking sucks.
	It just says scrotums it in one of my tabs and I was like, what the hell is that?
	It is up for auction.
	Oh, yeah.
	No one's been on it yet.
	That's another good sign.
	We got big.
	Somebody says Gavin's wrong about communist or something.
	Hello?
	Yes.
	Yes.
	Hi.
	How are you guys doing?
	How are you?
	Hi, we're good.
	How are you?
	Super, super good.
	Hey, Gavin, you know, before I say this, I'd like to ask you to confirm.
	Maybe you're right.
	So you said in communist, the main thing is basically this is the cornerstone.
	From each, according to his ability to each other.
	Yes, you are correct, sir.
	I made a mistake during a political quiz and I fell for communist rhetoric that sounded good, but was actually a bunch of Marxist bullshit.
	No, because this is the definition of exploitation.
	I mean, if you never fulfill your ability, you can always do more.
	And how much do you need?
	A person needs very little.
	So basically, subjugation incorporated.
	Yes, we covered this on the show, sir.
	We covered this on the show.
	I accidentally okayed Marxism and I was wrong.
	Okay, okay.
	Hey, Kevin, do you believe that God has a sense of humor?
	What?
	What's the question?
	Do you believe God has a sense of humor?
	In other words, do you believe in destiny?
	The same question.
	I believe that I think 5% of you is nurture.
	And yes, I believe in destiny.
	I see, I see, I see.
	So then if the future is already has been told, there is a percentage that you can manipulate your predicament, but not 100%.
	Well, I mean, it's either God knows what's going to happen or not.
	It's not somewhere in the middle.
	It's yes or no.
	So in other words, what's going on?
	But it's not yes or no.
	You can spontaneously kill yourself right now, which I kind of recommend.
	All right.
	Thanks for calling.
	Try to assimilate better here in the West.
	We're not quite as annoying as that.
	Thank you for your call.
	And don't, when you talk to people, don't lay traps.
	That's a British thing I've noticed too.
	When you're in a pub, they'll be like, they try to lure you in, you know, like, yeah, so don't you think that murdering people unjustly the way the English did to the Scots was wrong?
	Yes.
	Oh, so to burn a woman alive would be unjust, right?
	Yeah.
	Braveheart did that.
	That was kind of a lure.
	All right.
	Yeah.
	Okay.
	So you did lure.
	Luring is lame.
	Especially when I'm trying to draw a motorbike, which is pretty cool.
	I got Dan.
	By the way, the Discord server got shut down.
	What?
	Yeah.
	When?
	Today.
	I was just looking at it like a few hours ago.
	Yeah.
	Man, they are coming down hard on the G-Dog.
	Wait, my phone's dead.
	Can you charge my phone?
	Oh!
	That's brand new.
	How did they know it existed?
	And it wasn't really.
	First of all, I couldn't figure out the Discord.
	I'm too old.
	So I just see like 9 million people having random conversations about their ex-boyfriend or something.
	It wasn't planning the next revolution.
	It was pretty fucking benign.
	So it's gone.
	But what was it called?
	Holy Gadzekes.
	That's fucking crazy.
	So that, you know what that means, by the way?
	That means that flies are following me and censored TV and saying, shut it down.
	Which is just like, imagine being that pathetic of a fly that you want to shut down some stranger's conversation.
	I really don't think I can imagine that.
	They act like a scorned ex or like they just revolve around you.
	Their life is you.
	Well, they often are a scorned ex.
	And they can't get revenge on the ex for whatever reason, so they choose us.
	Dan, you're on the line.
	Hey, you got my name wrong, dude.
	It's Dan, not Dan.
	D-E-N.
	Well, you got my care wrong.
	It's zero, not one.
	It's a binary care system.
	No, it's Dan, like short for Benjamin.
	Okay.
	Oh, that's good to know.
	I'll be using that again in the future.
	Fantastic.
	Anyway, I was just calling because I'm a music producer from Australia.
	I just wanted to say, I think it's hilarious that I have to completely hide the fact I watch any kind of news media or video content by an author such as yourself.
	It seems there isn't a single person I've met in the music industry that doesn't have a really like firm leftist view and tries to weave that into nearly every fucking conversation.
	And it's just mind-numbing at this point.
	You know, when I was your age, that wasn't a thing.
	Like, we didn't know what someone else's...
	And if you heard someone was into Ron Reagan, even in the punk scene, you'd go, oh, that's kind of weird.
	Like the band Gangrene seemed to be into him.
	And obviously Johnny Ramon was into Ronald Reagan.
	And it was just like edgy and weird.
	It wasn't like the end of your fucking career, which it is now.
	Yeah, Philly.
	I mean, I was reading a book, and I was trying to ask you, I was going to ask you if you had run into any of that kind of thing in New York back in the early 2000s.
	And, you know, if people were constantly propping up feminism and like immigration rights and all that bullshit.
	And like, if you went against that, they might not want to work with you anymore.
	No, it wasn't really a thing.
	I mean, in the early aughts in New York City, it was maybe because everyone was still dying of heroin and stuff.
	We had other priorities.
	So if someone had, you know, unfortunate political beliefs, like I would wear a screwdriver shirt as a gag.
	And people would see me.
	It said screwdriver.
	And it had a picture from Robert Crumb's When the Goddamn Niggers Take Over America.
	And that was in the here.
	And it would just, it looked not dissimilar to this.
	And like an old black dude from the punk scene would see it and laugh his head off.
	He go, where the fuck did you get that shit?
	And we'd talk about screwdriver or something and laugh it off.
	No one took anything so fucking seriously.
	Now it's the opposite.
	Now it's like you could have a I hate screwdriver shirt on and you'd get in trouble for liking screwdriver.
	But yeah, I just have one more question.
	I'd love to know if you copped any shit as a result of passing out on the I think it was the stroke stage mid set or mid set or the kink stage mid set in your kinks?
	What, when I was doing my time traveling rock and roll tour?
	I think it was the strokes.
	It was the strokes, yeah.
	No, I didn't get any shit for that.
	Did you have to deal with anything after that?
	My time traveling rock and roll tour.
	What's the question?
	Did we do anything after that?
	Well, I noticed that in your book...
	No, no one found out really about my shitbag behavior.
	NME asked me for my article, and I didn't really have anything ready, so I just kind of made up a whole fucking story that was complete horseshit.
	And they were happy.
	The strokes were not impressed.
	The strokes were not nuts about my made up story where I talked about getting wasted with them and all kinds of stuff that was absolutely not true.
	But I never really paid the piper for that crime.
	All right, that's enough.
	Thanks for calling.
	I'm just going to leave you.
	I'm going to leave you one more thing.
	You should look up Celine Perry.
	No, we don't get.
	That's too many things.
	You've already had too many things.
	Didn't you get him in trouble with his wife or something?
	Somebody's famous.
	Well, that was an assumption.
	No, Fabrizio Moretti was the drummer, and they said, Where was Fabrizio?
	And I didn't remember talking to him.
	I was so shit-faced.
	So I went, He went off with some groupie, and it turns out he was dating Drew Barrymore at the time.
	So I basically framed him for an infidelity that he did not commit.
	My God, that's irresistible.
	Yeah, that was fucking lame.
	Oh, my God.
	But that's rock and roll.
	You know?
	Speaking of rock and roll, this is Matthew McConaughey online.
	Oh.
	Maybe you can explain the why of things.
	Hello, Gavin.
	Hey, Matthew.
	Gavin?
	Yeah.
	Hey, Matt.
	Gavin, I got a bone to pick with you.
	Okay.
	Now, I saw the video you did of me and my good friend Emmanuel Chill.
	Yep.
	And bless you, by the way.
	You know why I think you're sneezing is the air conditioning over there in Texas.
	Well, it is quite hot in Texas.
	But I would like to just go over with you the when, how, how, who, why, and what of the why.
	So how I came to come across you seeing that video.
	First of all, the when, it was last Friday, the day after Thursday.
	And the how was my agent showed it to me.
	And the who is I had to ask, who are you?
	I'm not familiar with your work.
	And my agent told me that you are the leader of a hate group.
	Yes.
	And the why I'm calling you is because I feel it is my duty to reach out to you and try and bring you to the light, Gavin.
	I'm worried about you.
	And I guess the what is, I wonder, what is your problem with racism?
	What is what, why do you feel the need to not try and end it?
	It seems like you're trying to have a dialogue with a monologue.
	Yeah, I feel like you're getting to a point where you need to know things that have, that you believe, that you think that we should not necessarily believe, but understand to be believed.
	And I get that.
	I get that because it's about knowing not just what you want to say, but what words can be and what will be heard in your earholes.
	That's too good.
	You're McConnell.
	Well, that's an interesting point, Gavin.
	Thank you, Matt.
	I would just.
	Thanks for calling, Matt.
	You're a huge inspiration.
	I just want to like, remember Carl Pilkington?
	He said, I want to be bullshit, man.
	And I fly through the air, and I say, when someone's bullshitting, I just slam with my cape and I go, bullshit.
	And I just want to fly to Matthew McConaughey and go, bullshit.
	What you're saying is bullshit.
	We got Johanna.
	Joanna.
	Johanna.
	Johanna?
	Are you retarded?
	It says Johanna.
	No, that's how you spell Joanna, you fuckwit.
	Is it?
	Holy shit.
	How can you know so little about everything?
	J-O-H-A-N-N-A?
	Yeah.
	Joanna.
	Oh.
	Go ahead, Joanna.
	It's Johannes.
	It's a dude.
	That's close enough.
	I knew it.
	Johanna.
	Oh, so it's not Johanna.
	It's Johanna.
	Oh, Johannes.
	Go ahead.
	How are you guys doing?
	Go ahead, Your Honor.
	Gavin, I don't think it's said often enough.
	I really just called in there to thank you for what you do.
	And I think your show is super high quality.
	I love tuning into it every night, or I guess four nights a week.
	And no one makes me laugh the way you do.
	It's kind of like what Joe Rogan, I think, said, once it's the involuntary laughter.
	That's how you measure if someone's funny or not.
	And you make me laugh when I least expect it.
	And God bless you for it.
	Thank you, sir.
	Appreciate that very much.
	That was nice.
	Okay.
	Calling about a song...
	Oh, by the way, that song, that...
	Love it.
	You're on the line, 636.
	Da Minci and Michelangelo.
	How we doing, boy?
	That's pretty good.
	What's up, guy?
	Hey.
	So I'm a music producer, and I'm working with a hot new artist.
	He goes by Ricky the Handyman.
	He's out of Newark, New Jersey.
	Okay, sounds great.
	And yeah, he's a big fat guy.
	He looks just like Vito in the Sopranos.
	Does he act like Vito?
	If we catch him somewhere, he's going to say it's a joke.
	It's a fucking joke.
	Please.
	He wrote you a homo erotic love song.
	He really wanted you to hear it.
	Yep.
	If you go on YouTube, Ryan, and just put in Ricky the Handyman, Boots On.
	Boots On.
	Yep, Boots On.
	It should be the first result.
	Oh, okay.
	I got it.
	Yep, there you go.
	And it's to the tune of a song I think you guys will recognize.
	All right.
	Well, yeah, enjoy.
	Thank you.
	Thank you very much.
	Come and meet me in the fag zone.
	Oh, no.
	Tonight, tonight, you can bang me in the bum hole.
	Tonight, tonight, cause I'm your sweaty, hairy man hoe.
	Tonight, tonight, and I'm here for the job, bro.
	Tonight, tonight, let me bang you with my boots on, yeah.
	Let me ride on your Python.
	Python?
	I've been dreaming about your dick hog, eat me out, pack, pack, let's fuck to some Black Flag.
	I know you don't like Antifa, yeah, but you know I fucking need ya.
	Fuck those little soy boys, I'm a man who's employed, so let me make you proud, boy.
	I got my hammy stretched out wide, looking on my forearm for a while.
	Dude, you know I got a tough side, but I'll let you jerk it on my sick thigh.
	I can see you got a stiffy, but I can fix that in a chiffy.
	Cause I'm your handyman, Ricky, but I don't like to work quickly.
	So let me bang you with my boots on, yeah.
	Let me ride on your Python.
	I've been thinking about your dick hog, eat me out, pack, pack, let's fuck to some Black Flag.
	I thought I was gay.
	I know you don't like Antifa, yeah, but you know I fucking need ya.
	You turn around.
	Fuck those little soy boys, I'm a man who's employed, so let me make you proud, boy.
	Hey, what's up, it's your boy, Ricky.
	I've been on Discord all night, looking at Gavin's ass.
	Listen, bro, if you want some real love, give me a call, we can hit the museum and see some of the world's oldest symbols.
	Yeah.
	So let me bang you with my boots on, yeah.
	The symbols.
	I'm not even like joke listening anymore.
	Now I'm just like drawing, listening to music.
	Yeah.
	I feel like Ozzy Osbourne.
	Yeah, yeah.
	I'm not doing my job.
	Now you know this is one of the oldest symbols.
	Again.
	I was here, it's a joke.
	It's a joke.
	It's a fucking joke.
	you you That was amazing.
	That was great.
	We should play Booya Nigga.
	Right.
	Now, how do I get there?
	Is that in the notes?
	It's in the Discord.
	I mean, it's in the fucking Reddit.
	Oh, okay.
	Gotcha.
	That still exists.
	I also parleyed it.
	That still exists.
	Oh, you did?
	Okay.
	We'll go to the parlay.
	No, I didn't parley it, actually.
	Okay, well, then it's a little bit of a double.
	It has a little nigga in it I chickened out.
	Right.
	Let's take a call.
	Somebody wants to talk about the book.
	What?
	301.
	Hey, Gabriel, my aunt?
	Hey, man.
	Hello?
	Hello, hello.
	Sweet.
	So I got two quick questions.
	Okay.
	So, I know you said Lily Allen is a perfect 10 in a sailor outfit, right?
	Correct.
	Do you know Ali Z, the French singer?
	Allie G, Allie Z. Allie Z. Allie Z. Who's that?
	How do you say it?
	L-I-Z-E-E.
	A-L-I-Z-Z-E.
	A-L-I-Z-E-E.
	I bet we're not going to be able to do it.
	And then you have a song.
	Jen I Marie, I guess.
	What does that translate?
	I'm fed up the way she dances.
	That's a tent.
	In her long stockings.
	In her heels on?
	Yeah.
	Do you see a black outfit?
	Yeah, that's a live performance with a four-year-old playing guitar.
	Yes.
	Yes.
	It's like very country-looking, like, kind of.
	I think she's a 10.
	That is a tent.
	That is a tent, thank you.
	And then I have a second question about your book.
	Are you familiar with the chapter, Hey Dude, where's my nose?
	I am very familiar with my own life, yes.
	I just want to know what the fuck Jeff was doing while you and bullshitter Shane were getting your mouse like caved in.
	Was he just in the back with calling for help or he was just chilling?
	He was just chilling.
	I mean, I drove us to the hospital with blood shooting under my nose, and he was so wasted.
	He was such an asshole that he was just like sitting like, this sucks.
	Actually, Shane wanted to go to the clubs in Hull.
	He was like, this isn't such a big deal.
	Yeah, he was just, I don't even remember if he was at the hospital.
	I think he may have just taken a cab home.
	No, actually, I'm pretty sure he stayed there the whole time in retrospect.
	But yeah, what a fucking moron.
	Like, it's okay to pick fights.
	Wait, go ahead.
	My fault.
	Go ahead.
	It's okay to pick fights if you're prepared to, you know, do the dirty work.
	Exactly.
	All right.
	Thanks for watching.
	No, no, no, no more of that.
	I've had enough of that.
	One more before I leave.
	If you had to do the laundry and your house was really hot and you could have been nude, but like a painter was coming by to do some touch-ups on your office, would you stay nude or would you have like sweatpants nearby in case you had to enter the door in the nude?
	We got Brennan.
	Oh, this is Eric, actually.
	Oh, my bad.
	Who cares?
	Yeah, I just wanted to say, Gavin, I think you, I am like, I watch your show all the time.
	And, you know, I just found out I'm gay.
	And I can only watch your show in like five seconds increments because I will ruin my boxers if I watch it for any longer.
	Oh, thank you very much.
	And my question for you is, how do I come out to my dickhead conservative dad?
	Just say, dad, I have AIDS.
	And then when he starts crying, go, just kidding, I'm just gay.
	Oh, yeah.
	Okay.
	And O'Brien, if I get kicked out and my dad disowns me, can I come live in the fag zone with you?
	Sir, I think wherever you go is the fag zone.
	Up top, am I right?
	I'm straight.
	Nice, nice.
	All right, thanks for calling.
	No, you're not Ryan.
	Stop it.
	Let's drop the call.
	It's bad service.
	It's funny if I got all mad about those calls.
	Like on Stern, they call this place where the trades like junk.
	It's called swap shop or something.
	And after, when they get the prank calls, the guy's like, all right, well, it just seems like some people aren't mature enough to handle a swap shop show.
	So we're just going to cut the line.
	So I hope that person's proud of himself.
	Yeah.
	It's all business here, bastards.
	Next call, you're on the line.
	What's up, G-Dog?
	What's up, RiceGuard?
	Rice?
	What's up, dog?
	What the hey, real quick, I just moved out here not too long ago to Texas, and I hit up the mall.
	My wife and kids, and we're walking through, and typical SJW-looking white bitch passed by and looked at me crazy, you know.
	And I asked my wife, I'm like, is she looking at me?
	She's like, no, I don't think so.
	And then she yelled that there was a white supremacist in the mall.
	And I didn't know.
	And when I got in the car, I realized I was wearing my Gavin and Ryan, the cartoon one that I ordered from online.
	So I guess she was talking to me.
	And that bears the question, how well known are you in that community?
	You know, that they can identify you through a cartoon picture and call the Hispanic guy a white supremacist.
	That's fucking nuts, dude.
	So that's the one where I'm holding Ryan's hand and he's super short?
	Yeah.
	This is crazy.
	It's crazy.
	They've gone full Hitler.
	It's fucking nuts.
	Wow.
	I guess I'm very famous.
	Like I'm famous across the world as this fake boogeyman.
	And they use it to, I don't know, to answer all their problems.
	I'm impressed, though, that she recognized me from that shirt.
	You better get that shirt off.
	Yeah, I'm going to burn it.
	All right.
	Thanks for calling.
	All right, we got Tom.
	These markers are dead, man.
	Dang.
	Tom, you want to land, dog.
	Hey, Gavin, I just want to thank you for posting that YouTube video with Paul Harvey, the policeman.
	Really, it was just fantastic, and glad you shared that.
	What are you talking about?
	You posted a Paul Harvey video, The Policeman, on YouTube.
	You shared it on, I think, Pauler.
	And it was about explaining what the policeman has to do and all that stuff.
	And how it just helped me reach out to my niece who is on the job.
	And it was a really very powerful video.
	Okay, cool.
	Wait, let me see.
	What's this?
	Is this guy here?
	Paul Harvey.
	Oh, that one.
	Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
	That's a classic.
	That's a classic.
	Isn't it sad that you have to go back to, I think Paul Harvey was from like the 60s to explain to people what this fucking job is.
	Yeah.
	Great job, Gavin.
	Thank you.
	Thank you.
	Thanks for calling.
	Very good.
	Yeah, he was a big, he was like the rushed limba of the 60s.
	Uh-oh, what's this?
	What the fuck are you doing?
	Booyah, nigga.
	Booyah nigga Hey yo Booyah nigga Booyah nigga Get shit hammered Booyah nigga Oh yeah, nigga On the show!
	Oh!
	Dude, yeet yeet Drunk Nigga, it's drunk.
	I'm fucking bastard.
	I'm fucking bastard.
	Let me restart the whole thing.
	I'm close to canceling this show.
	Booyah, nigga.
	On the show.
	Oh, whoever did that.
	Pretty good.
	They're good at their job.
	To be clear, booyah nigga.
	Nigga means that.
	Booyah means don't want.
	So when every time, I've been to China many times, but when we were last there in Singapore with the David Cross shooting, the vice travel thing, all these people come up with these little pamphlets of fake Rolex and stuff.
	And hey, you'll buy, you'll buy.
	And it's annoying.
	And you're just like, and then we, after a while, we're like, boo ya, nigga.
	Booyah, nigga.
	Because it means I don't want that.
	Booyah, nigga.
	Yeah, that's right.
	Booyah, nigga.
	It was fun.
	Then we liked them coming by because we got to rap.
	We got Brian talking about punk rock.
	Go ahead, Brian.
	Do your thing, Brian.
	Go up, go up, go up.
	I just made that up right now.
	What's up, gentlemen?
	What's up, dude?
	Hey.
	Not much.
	I think it goes without saying that our lifetime, we won't see a reunion of Anal Chinook, unfortunately.
	I mean, I'd have to truck all the way up to Canada and then spend like three weeks practicing.
	Also, I started a hardcore cover band here in New York, and it is exhausting.
	That's what I was going to ask.
	Jumping around, and you get a headache from the screaming.
	It's a young man's game.
	So you did like 80s hardcore.
	Yeah.
	You can find it online.
	Oh, it was on my YouTube page.
	I saw you in a parking lot.
	Yeah, we did a show in a parking lot once, and we just did like, you know, it was really, we did, you know, we did Chrome Ags and Minor Threat and stuff.
	Bad Brains was a fucking bitch.
	And Black Flag was basically impossible outside of Six Pack.
	Even Six Pack was unbelievably hard.
	Those guys are jazz musicians.
	You would think that it would just be four, four, three power chords.
	One, two, three, four.
	It is 90% of the time with 90% of the bands.
	But Black Flag and Bad Brains were in a different universe.
	And we didn't realize until we were, well, I don't play an instrument, but until those guys were like, I can't do this.
	I can't do this.
	Cro-Mags and fucking Agnostic Front, though, that was some easy peasy lemon squeezy.
	What was the name of the band?
	You do it on your video?
	I think it was just 80s hard.
	It was 8-0-S and then HC.
	So.
	Or maybe it was all one word, 8-0-S-H-C.
	Anyway, thanks for calling, buddy.
	I'm looking for it because I remember.
	So, we don't do the Discord anymore.
	It's gone.
	It sucks, right?
	Yeah.
	Isn't that this week is nuts?
	Anyway, I'm done my drawing.
	Oh, did a little rotate for us?
	Maybe it's easier to see with this camera.
	That's pretty cool.
	It looks nice framed.
	You know, if you can explain the whole story, that's pretty cool.
	Max, talk about Disco.
	Uh yeah.
	Hey.
	So maybe I can answer some of your questions about Discord.
	Oh, Dot Discord.
	About a week ago when you opened Discord, yeah.
	The Discord program.
	So about a week ago when you launched Discord, they had a banner at the top of the program which said Discord is now committed to Black Lives Matter.
	Click here to read more.
	And you click on it, and it tells you how they're going to shut down hate Discords and all this nonsense.
	And so the Gavin McGinnis Discord was renamed to the Justice for Floyd Discord.
	Hopefully they wouldn't delete it.
	But they deleted it anyways.
	So there's an alternative.
	You know, we have to keep making alternatives for everything.
	They ban you off Twitter.
	You've got to have parlor.
	For Reddit, I don't know if you know this.
	Did I ever say black lives don't matter?
	Like, why am I the anti-black guy?
	I know more black people than any of the people coming up with these stupid rules.
	Yeah, could be.
	But I just want to let all the listeners know what the alternative is.
	Okay.
	So if you go to rebrand.ly slash censoretv, that'll forward you over to it's a platform called Matrix.
	You access it through something called Riot.
	And it's basically Discord, but you host it yourself.
	It's decentralized.
	It's open source.
	It's encrypted.
	So they can never shut it down.
	So go back to show yourself typing that in.
	One more time.
	It's rebrand.
	Rebrand.ly slash censored TV.
	You'll have to make an account.
	Ryan, show yourself typing that in.
	Rebrand.ly slash censored.tv?
	Nope.
	Censored TV.
	No, just censored TV.
	You've already done your dot.
	The actual link is harder to say on the air, so this is just forwarding you.
	Isn't it crazy how this is, you know, I remember having friends who lived in Moscow in the 90s, and they'd always have weird shit like this.
	We are living in Russia.
	They're always like, yes, I can watch any movie I want, but I have to get through my encrypted VPN.
	All right, don't go showing them all that.
	But thank you for showing us that.
	So riot.hm, I guess it is.
	Yeah.
	And this is, yeah, pretty much the same Discord, but they can never shut it down because no corporation controls it.
	But there's another website to check out as well.
	So there's the Donald.win.
	I don't know if you know about this, but once Reddit shut down the Donald subreddit, some guys created their own version of Reddit.
	Show yourself typing it in.
	The Donald.
	The Donald Trump.
	Yeah, this is basically Reddit for only Donald Trump, and they plan on adding a Gavin McGinnis censored TV section to that website.
	So we'll have our own private Discord on Riot, and we have our own private Reddit on the Donald.win.
	Cool.
	When is that all going?
	We're going to run our own shit, Dave.
	Soon is what I heard for the Donald.win thing.
	But people can join the Riot right now.
	Well, it makes sense that we would have to do all this encryption and hiding.
	I mean, we are trafficking in the adrenochrome of young, startled babies and having bizarre, elaborate satanic ceremonies on a regular basis.
	So that's not going to be mainstream.
	Right?
	Yeah, I know.
	Well, yeah, have a good night, guys.
	You too.
	Thanks for calling.
	And that is our show, folks.
	We're out of time.
	I'd like to end this evening with a call to arms where I would say, not just get fired, but what the fuck is going on?
	We are getting buried in bullshit.
	We are getting hidden and driven from the cities, driven from the internet.
	There's something they don't want us to see.
	There's something they don't want others to hear us say.
	And you know what that is?
	That's the truth.
	And you know what the solution to that is?
	Keep saying the truth.
	Keep fighting.
	Keep winning.
	Get fired.
	Get in trouble.
	Be brave.
	And never stop fighting.
	Booyah nigga, get shit hammered.
	Booyah nigga, booyah nigga.
	On the show!
	Oh.
	Dude, yee ye.
	Drum.
	Nigga, it's drunk.
	I'm fucking past.
	I'm fucking bastard.

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