Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - S02E91 - DOUBLE KNOCKOUT

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Nov. 26, 2019 - Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes

01:21:57

S02E91 - DOUBLE KNOCKOUT

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	Am I getting weaker or is that ghetto blaster getting heavier?
	I put extra batteries inside of it.
	Did you?
	No.
	That was X-Hex from Washington, D.C., and their song was, I don't want to lose your love.
	It's in the heart.
	It's just a question of.
	Really fucking good band.
	And as a sexist, I assumed that some dude was writing all their songs because they're just too good.
	They're too catchy.
	But then I saw that they're fives and I thought, well, fives can be talented.
	They don't get invited to parties.
	Squeeze me.
	It's empty.
	So they had a really sort of a hollow 60s Sonics bare bones rock sound on the first album, which that's from.
	But the new album is called Let's Rule.
	I forgot to get my notes.
	XX.
	Let's rule.
	No, no, it's in the notes, shithead.
	Oh, I'm sorry.
	And it's got more of a journey big fuller sound.
	But boy, can she rock out on the old guitar.
	So she's gone from like the 60s to the 80s.
	Did you see these mugs?
	Yeah, people want those mugs.
	Are they on the site yet?
	I don't think so.
	You had it for a second there.
	There we go.
	Gavin is showing the mug for those audio listeners out there.
	Great work by Brian J. Spencer.
	This rat is very exact.
	Isn't he?
	Oh yeah.
	We're sort of off to a slow start today, aren't we, folks?
	I'll be quite honest with you.
	I brought my motorcycle into the city because it's such a beautiful day.
	And it sucks.
	Because traffic is traffic.
	It doesn't matter if you're in a car or a motorbike.
	Yeah, you can go in between the cars.
	Not really.
	You get a ticket for that.
	And I love cops, but I fucking hate the way they talk to me when I get a ticket.
	You mind telling me why you're going in between cars?
	Yeah, because I'm on a fucking motorcycle and I want to get somewhere faster.
	I hate that you mind telling me.
	Hey, cops, you're great guys.
	We appreciate you.
	But stop saying you mind telling me.
	You know what I mean?
	It's so patronizing.
	It's condescending a little bit.
	What am I supposed to say to that?
	Because I'm an idiot?
	Because I suck and I deserve.
	Just give me the fucking ticket.
	Shithead.
	But I don't do that.
	I just seethe.
	Hey, working-class black America, when you get pulled over, seethe.
	Can't fight the seether.
	Sether.
	Can't fight the seether.
	I can't see her when she's foaming at.
	I love Chick Rock, don't I?
	Can't fight the seether without a spark.
	Did you send me a picture of a cop punching out a guy?
	Yeah, he got punched and sicked his dog on the guy.
	Well, show me.
	I got it.
	Coming up.
	Because I have a whole montage.
	I'm trying to get back on my motorbike, get out of the city, and go ripping around Hutchinson Parkway.
	Ripping around.
	So I just want to go through letters today.
	I have a little bit of news, and then I want to look at people getting knocked out.
	And then I want to get, then I want to hit the road, hit the highway.
	What are you doing?
	Oh, shit.
	He fucking punched him.
	Just punched a cop in the face?
	How is that going to go down?
	I'll tell you how.
	Oh, yo, what the fuck?
	This nigga punched.
	That dog wants him so bad.
	You just punched my friend, sir.
	Your arm is no more.
	By the way, dude, you're lucky you didn't get shot.
	Yeah, for real, dude.
	He didn't even take his gun out.
	Those bites are gifts from the local PD.
	Each bite is a gift.
	He should be saying thank you to each little tooth.
	Thanks, dog.
	Thank you so much.
	Who the?
	Well, he's obviously mentally ill.
	Maybe.
	That dog does not stop, and the cop does not stop him, if you will.
	Don't.
	So, yeah, we're going to check out a montage of dudes getting punched in the face.
	Oh, you know what I heard at the bar last night?
	What's up?
	There's this coach in New Rochelle, Coach D, they call him, because he has a perfect cock.
	Don't just kidding.
	I thought you were serious.
	All the moms have to refer to him as Coach D, and they hate it.
	Hey, Coach D. Yeah, what do you want to ask?
	I just want to ask to bring my son over for practice.
	And who do you want to ask that to?
	You.
	And what's my name again?
	Coach D. Coach D. It's Coach D. You fucking bet your bottom dollar it is, bitch.
	You try to say coach?
	Hey, Coach.
	I don't hear when people say coach.
	Now, there's a lot of coaches in the world.
	I hear Coach D. Talking about Coach Bag.
	Prick up your ears.
	Prick up my D. So yeah, this guy, Coach D, and he's named that because it's an abbreviation of a D name.
	He's not in the notes, so you'll have to dig it up on your own.
	So you get this story.
	Is that it?
	Coach Lou Dorenzo.
	This fucking guy, he goes to school and he sees his 13-year-old niece is wasted, right?
	It happens.
	You do dumb stuff when you're a teenager.
	13 is pretty young, though.
	But 14 is normal.
	Remember Jungle Juice?
	Did you have that and you're in the Bronx?
	I remember Jungle Juice, it's a bunch of everything.
	Yeah, you take a jar and you pour a little bit of each drink into your jar.
	God, it tastes like Satan's foreskin.
	And there's never a top for the jar.
	So it's always like saran wrap with 50 rubber bands.
	And then you have to, oh, sometimes you plug your nose.
	In my high school at the Earl of March in Kanata, Ontario, we would be fucking pissed if you didn't barf.
	Like we would put in a pact to drink till we barf and we all agreed, barf.
	And then we see some guy not chugging jungle juice and not puking.
	And it was like he hurt our family.
	I remember being so fucking mad at Rick Lowe.
	You didn't barf at all last night?
	No, I didn't get wasted enough to barf.
	We had a pact.
	We had a deal, Rick.
	Anyway, so she shows up to school.
	She's got a buzz on.
	Someone fucked up.
	And so the coach goes, oh, for crying out loud.
	And he calls, I guess it's his sister, his niece's mom.
	I don't know what side of the family this uncle is on.
	But he calls his sister, we'll say, his family member, to come get the girl.
	Guess what the school did?
	Fired him.
	No way.
	You have to go through proper school channels.
	Remember when I was telling you the other day that my son was told if he sees someone beating his sister, he has to go and get a teacher?
	And I said, ah, no.
	You jump on that person and get them off your sister.
	Fuck the school.
	Well, this is it.
	The state handles your children.
	The state decides what to do if a girl is drunk.
	Not you.
	You don't handle your own children.
	Isn't that fucking disgusting?
	This should be a national story.
	That's like government getting involved in family, basically.
	Well, that's what they want to do.
	The state wants to take over your life.
	They want to take over parenting.
	This is why you have de Blasio fighting charter schools, even though they're great for kids in New York, especially poor black kids.
	You see him fighting those.
	He doesn't want charter schools.
	He wants to, I'll handle it, my public schools.
	And at the same time, they're pushing school to go to 6.30 p.m.
	That's crazy.
	A fucking child.
	Look, school used to be good.
	Then it became a glorified daycare.
	Now it's child abuse.
	A little boy.
	You know how much fucking energy they have?
	I take my six-year-old and his friend boxing on Thursdays.
	We go to McDonald's after.
	They are playing in that play area until sweat is pouring off of them.
	These are guys who have just been doing push-ups, sit-ups, hitting the heavy bag for an hour, and they can't wait to rip through the plaything.
	So that's like two hours of non-stop freaking oot because they don't get any exercise at school.
	Recess at some of these schools is like 20 minutes.
	Forest kindergarten should be all school.
	I am, people give me shit, call me a Nazi, whatever.
	I am a radical when it comes to education.
	If you think that I'm too controversial, you're right.
	I am against school.
	Fuck school, fuck school, fuck my iSchool.
	It's a fucking catastrophe.
	This is a direct attack on the family unit.
	Yeah.
	So what it's imagine being such a cuck that you see your wasted niece and you go, oh, I better go talk to a teacher.
	Your niece is like, where are you going, Uncle D?
	What's going on?
	Just stay right there.
	I have to go get an authority figure.
	I can't handle this.
	There's something North Korean about that.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	Is that a forest kindergarten?
	Yep.
	I thought you said forest kindergarten.
	Foreskinned kindergarten.
	Only for kids with foreskins, which I'm also very for.
	These kids just play all day.
	Adventuring and learning.
	If it's raining, if it's snowing, they're outside all day.
	And when they end up in a normal school, they adjust perfectly.
	This is where kids should be.
	Kids should not be sitting confined in a chair.
	God, we're such a barbaric society.
	We have, what, 3 million men in cages right now, in little cells where they can touch either side.
	Men in cages.
	Children in little desks being preached to at the age of six years old.
	The fuck are we doing?
	When did we become such barbarians?
	God, the hippies were right.
	It's like robots.
	Drop out.
	Tune in, turn on, drop out.
	I'm a hippie.
	Anyway, this construction is going to drive me insane.
	It is a disaster.
	Let's power through, man.
	You know.
	All right.
	Here's an interesting thing.
	Remember when Ivanka Trump got a white dog?
	No.
	See if you can pull it up.
	Oh, that was fast.
	there's a Yeah, so, how, darling?
	I see you skipped a rescue and went straight to Aryan Breeder.
	Does it sit in Zeke Heil yet?
	That's Nancy Lee Grant.
	I believe she's a soap star.
	Certified soap star.
	Is she like a part black or something?
	God, the only thing more annoying and stupid than an actress is a daytime soap actress.
	Anyway, first of all, guys, when you get a rescue dog, you're not helping anyone.
	You're not helping the environment.
	It's not more ethical.
	It's just a fucking dog.
	There's always going to be strays.
	There's always going to be fucking rescues.
	You got to wonder why it's available to adopt, too.
	Probably bit a kid.
	It's probably one of Mike Vick's pit bulls.
	He would be a felon right now if it were after Trump signed what he signed yesterday.
	Oh, he signed some animal rights thing?
	The first in history.
	I'm so bored by animal rights.
	It's so like you sit there eating a chicken sandwich and you eat meat and then you're like, but this dog has big eyes and I rescued him.
	How is it different?
	Yes, the Chinese eat dogs.
	So?
	You eat cows and chickens and pigs.
	What the fuck does it matter?
	No, dogs are different.
	No, they're not.
	They're stupid.
	You want to see how smart a dog is?
	Have a piece of food there, okay?
	Like a little doggy treat.
	Then take a solo cup, put it on top of the doggy treat.
	He will be too retarded to move the cup and get the food.
	He'll just go, oh shit.
	Oh, it's locked.
	It's locked away in a little plastic solo safe that I have no access to because I don't understand how anything works because I'm a fucking dog.
	Oh, he's sitting.
	You know what he's saying?
	He's saying, what are you doing in my chair?
	No, he's not.
	He's saying, food, food, sex, territory, territory.
	Food, food, food, sex.
	Food, food, food.
	Food, food, food, territory, territory.
	Food, food, food.
	Food, food, food.
	Look, there we go.
	Can't get it.
	It's gone.
	Anyway.
	I don't care about that one dog.
	I'm so sick of, too, Howard Stern.
	They have this, like, North Shore animal rescue thing.
	There it is.
	Oh, real men love cats.
	Look, she clearly, it's so glaringly obvious.
	She clearly feels she needs to fill a void because she never had kids.
	So she has fur babies.
	And look at Howard Stern.
	He's so vain and insecure at the same time.
	And she thinks she's helping by taking in a bunch of kittens.
	They're just going to breed more.
	You might as well take in a bunch of fucking spider crickets or rats.
	Like, why?
	Because they're cute and furry.
	It's somehow more ethical to save them.
	Why not save snakes?
	The snake population is totally endangered in China.
	If you love animals, why don't you go to China on a save the snakes rampage?
	Oh, they have small eyes and they're not cute.
	You like baby seals because they have big eyes.
	So really, all you care about is the same thing a fucking six-year-old cares about.
	What's cutest?
	What a total and utter waste of time.
	Total.
	You know how much money Howard Stern makes?
	He makes about 90 million a year.
	Like, go buy every dog in the world and give it a million dollars.
	Right.
	I mean, what?
	I don't understand what you're trying to do.
	You think you're helping by taking in like two stray dogs?
	Is there a more irrelevant gesture imaginable?
	Ugh.
	I hate people with dogs.
	Like, I have a dog.
	It's a good little alarm thing if someone is skulking around the property.
	I appreciate that.
	And I can see it.
	It's fun to have a German shepherd.
	You come home and you wrestle with it and stuff.
	But when people are, like, really into their dogs, bumper sticker levels, and they talk about it all the time and they're spending like 30 grand at the vet because he has to have his gallbladder removed.
	Just shoot them.
	Get another one.
	It's a fucking dog.
	It's God's accident.
	They're losers.
	Animals are losers.
	I've said it a million times.
	A hammerhead shark is a fucking joke.
	They're so majestic, though.
	When God sees a hammerhead shark, you know what he does?
	He goes, oh, shit.
	It cracks him up.
	No.
	Animals crack him up.
	He was going for this.
	He was going for a human.
	And he just splogged all over Earth.
	And his magic intensity that made this also got on some other shit and made like trees and some fucking weird moss and other stuff.
	And it went into the ocean and made some stuff.
	All of God's plan was about making us in his own image.
	We are the perfect thing.
	All this other stuff is just like God's jizz getting stuck on a fucking little cell in the ocean.
	That's a loser.
	How can you not see that?
	That's a giant loser.
	Look at his face.
	He's such a dumb waste of space.
	Hey, I'm all teeth.
	Chomp, chomp.
	I can't ever stop swimming or I die.
	That's how badly designed I am.
	Oh, that's true.
	What a fucking retard.
	How is this okay that they're doing that?
	Don't they take little bites?
	Well, it might be one of those great whites that thinks it's a toad.
	Ah, they're not a threat.
	You know, we were cutting clips because we got the clip coming out, shareable on YouTube with a bunch of clips.
	And we rewatched the Toad part.
	And it delivers...
	You know how when you thought that...
	Or people are just hearing you talk and looking at a man in a corny Ivisu blazer from the late 90s.
	at Dode.
	When you thought, I'm working on it.
	When you thought it was like, oh, he's a fat.
	And it was actually...
	Yeah.
	And when we do Tony Soprano and it's like, but really he goes, Yeah, someone was talking to me about that.
	Yeah.
	This is the only time that it's better than our impression where we go, it's a dude.
	We watch the Dinesh thing and it's better to pull it up.
	Okay.
	Do you know what's cool?
	The guys at my gym and my bartenders, I'm such a fucking barfly that they get to know me and then they end up, just because I'm talking about my work sometimes, they end up subscribing to the show.
	And then I'll have my bartender, the fucking ex-Hell's Angel, being like, yeah, well, I guess if you think you're a doad.
	No.
	Yes.
	That's so.
	All these inside jokes are now out into the cosmos.
	In fact, one of the guys at my gym came up to me, this guy Tommy, came up to me today and he goes, dude, I'm listening to the audiobook of Death the Cool.
	That fucking quote about today's bitch is tomorrow's dead man.
	You learned that as a tree planter.
	I'm like, I have no recollection of saying that.
	That sounds really cool.
	Today's bitch is tomorrow's dead man.
	That's awesome.
	That would be a good t-shirt, wouldn't it?
	Yes.
	Today's bitch is tomorrow's dead.
	Today's bitch is tomorrow's dead man.
	Don't you think?
	Yeah, I do.
	All right.
	While you try to find that doad, the reason I brought up that dog is because people are now so obsessed with race that they think the actual color is relevant to a discussion on race.
	This is a white, a mostly white mug, okay?
	I'm known as a white person.
	I'm not actually white, though.
	I'm more of like a peach hue of pink.
	It's just a word that people use.
	Like when you catch a cold, you didn't literally grab some cold Air and keep it in the palm of your hand.
	It's a euphemism.
	It's just a word.
	But we become so fucking mental that when a rich woman like Ivanka Trump gets a white dog, it's somehow a statement about white people.
	What it gets crazier.
	You ready for this?
	This is 1.6.
	Actually, I'll just let the video play out and you can see for yourself because they're so proud of themselves in this video.
	They're really sticking it to the man.
	The racists are just sitting watching this going, why you?
	I used to like that thing that you just changed.
	And now I'm mad because I can't enjoy the fact that this thing used to be a rule in chess and you switched it around, thereby gaining equality for all.
	We broke a rule in chess today.
	Could change minds tomorrow.
	You're fucking nerds.
	These guys will never experience a threesome till the day they die.
	They have no idea what cocaine feels like.
	We broke a rule in the middle.
	Is that the whole thing?
	Could change minds tomorrow.
	What's tomorrow?
	Yeah, 17 seconds.
	What?
	I've been wanting to show this all week.
	Are you serious?
	Yeah.
	You don't remember that it was just that?
	Well, you got to find it now.
	Okay.
	Look up Anish Geary.
	Do you know what it is?
	No.
	Oh, I have to give it away now.
	Okay.
	In chess, the white pawn always goes first.
	And then it's the black pawn.
	God.
	Or whatever.
	The first move is always one of the plastic pieces.
	Do you think it's literally a knight?
	Do you think that the castle is really a castle that someone lives in?
	It's a plastic little piece of shit.
	It's a strategy game that uses garbage.
	I love chess.
	I'm impressed by it, of course.
	But the fact that you made this racial?
	What?
	So these dumb losers think that they're political activists because they broke a rule in chess today.
	This is the full video.
	I've been playing chess since I was six years old, and every time I played, White Star.
	You're such a fucking loser.
	This guy's a bigger loser than Jack Ma.
	What?
	How are they related?
	They're not related.
	You're not helping any race.
	You're helping a plastic.
	Piece of plastic.
	Yo, I really appreciate how...
	Imagine anybody caring about this that was of color.
	I worked in a celebration of the NAACP.
	I traded in all of our china, all of our white plates.
	I smashed them.
	And we got black plates.
	And it was just our way, my family's way of making a gesture towards the black community.
	And when they come over, I would be remiss if I didn't say, hey, excuse me, come here.
	And I bring black people.
	The few times they come to my home, I bring them to the kitchen and I show them my black plates.
	I go, what do you think?
	No white plates.
	You know where the white plates are?
	In the fucking garbage.
	I smash them all.
	And you know what they always say?
	What?
	Thank you.
	They go, every little bit counts.
	And the more black products you buy, the better it is for us because we own the color black and we get dividends.
	That would be cool.
	What the fuck is going on with the world?
	A white dog has nothing to do with white people.
	A black piece of plastic has absolutely zero to do with black people.
	They're not literally black.
	And even if they were, they don't work with pieces of plastic.
	It's a separate thing.
	Did you not know that that's not a black person?
	What the fuck?
	How did we get here?
	Yeah, you're laughing now.
	We're going to have two kings on the board.
	Why does it have to be a king and a queen?
	We're getting rid of the kings, actually.
	It's two queens.
	It's two queens to celebrate women.
	It makes the game kind of confusing.
	We have to relearn the rules.
	Move for equality.
	Okay, you know what?
	I bet?
	I'll bet you anything that move for equality is a Soros or DNC-funded bullshit thing, and it purports to be about fighting racism.
	But when you actually check their work, it is all about immigration.
	And it's all about immigration because the DNC wants Hispanic votes.
	You know that guy that was shut down?
	The cop who was being investigated for being a proud boy?
	It was by a law firm in D.C. We talked about this on the show.
	And I looked them up, and 99% of the stuff they fought for was amnesty and sanctuary cities and all this other shit.
	Nothing to do with equality, everything to do with Mexicans.
	You know, this is all a lie.
	So I was thinking about the Kaepernick thing, too.
	He's told by the news that like everybody hates cops.
	So he's just doing what he thought everybody would like.
	He didn't know that people would be like, dude, fuck.
	Oh, I've said that a million times.
	A lot of immigrants that seem like immigrates and are shitting on America, like that black guy who was crapping on the Proud Boys in Halifax.
	And he said, why are you gay?
	I'm sorry, I'm getting into my African.
	He said, dig down that flag.
	That is a flag of genocide.
	Your flag did.
	He was talking about the original Canadian flag, which has a Union jack on it.
	He was saying it's a flag of genocide.
	Judging by his accent, he's been in the country for about a year.
	So what is he doing?
	Why does he hate Canada?
	Because that's what he was taught.
	It's like the Sarnev brothers.
	They weren't radical when they were young.
	They were radicalized by us, by teachers, by Marxists.
	We're responsible for these fucking nuts.
	Now I hear fucking Dinesh's accent every time I open my mouth.
	We are responsible for these fucking nuts.
	It's hard.
	I don't think I've ever heard him swear.
	Did you find the toad yet?
	Yeah, for some reason the video is not loading at the same time.
	I think I have a problem with my quick play, quick type.
	Speaking of Proud Boys and letters, I want to get catch up in a lot of letters today, but I got this dude.
	Where is he here?
	Who was just fired from the Department of Home Security.
	Good morning, Gavin.
	Today I was officially Fired from the Department of Homeland Security for my association with Proud Boys.
	After being questioned by both a criminal investigation agent and a Secret Service agent, I learned that a DHS computer scan revealed that back in May, I Google searched Proud Boys after learning about the organization from my former girlfriend, who was an original Proud Boys girl.
	So he was fired for Googling Proud Boys.
	This goes back to the chess piece.
	It also makes me question, like I know we're living in a deranged time and it's basically the Salem witch trials and there's they don't actually have a witch.
	Like if there was Nazis and they were hunting them and they got some and some got caught in the crossfire and were collateral damage, you go, okay, well that's still kind of noble.
	But they're not.
	They're not looking for Nazis.
	Why do all these groups that are furiously doxing Proud Boys or throwing Roger Stone in jail or throwing Proud Boys in prison, all of these fucking nuts that talk about racism all the time, why don't they ever talk about the Aryan nations or any of the bona fide white power gangs, biker gangs in this country?
	Because they don't really give a shit about racism.
	What they give a shit about is using that as a blanket term to throw over their enemies so we can't see anymore and we're made to non-exist.
	But when I get emails like this, I think, I'm not a witch.
	It is the witch trials, but am I helping?
	Like, what if I was never born?
	Would the world be better off or worse off?
	That's the 36th proud boy I know of to be fired.
	Should I have started this organization?
	I mean, I get a lot of emails saying, hey, man, finally settled down.
	I had a kid.
	I got my life in order.
	I stopped doing drugs, whatever.
	I get a lot of those.
	But does that outweigh the 36 guys fired?
	I know they weren't fired for a good reason, but they're still fired.
	Anyway, he goes, I email him back.
	I go, that's fucking insane.
	And he goes, yeah, brother, it's a big shock coming this close to Christmas.
	I'm a 15-year veteran of the U.S. Army and a single father of three young kids.
	I've been a firefighter, reserve sheriff's deputy, and soldier in my life, and have never been treated so poorly and actually questioned about, and he puts this in quote, Nazi ties, just because I expressed interest in a pro-America group.
	I just wanted you guys to know this ridiculousness is still alive and well in all aspects of our government.
	Say hi to Ryan for me.
	Hey.
	My girl and I met him at Harry's Bar in D.C. after the July 6th free speech rally.
	Oh, very cool.
	We had group sex, and his penis was a lot bigger than I thought it would be.
	She misses him, and I'm still weirded out.
	Our relationship is actually kind of on the rocks now.
	What's this?
	I caught her diddling her bean to your sh- diddling her bean?
	That means masturbating.
	Oh, okay.
	Diddling her bean to pictures of Ryan that she had taped to our ceiling.
	What?
	Are you for real?
	No, I'm not for real.
	I made up that last part.
	He ended it with say hi to Ryan.
	That is terrible, man.
	Isn't that fucked up?
	It's terrible.
	Where else could we move?
	Let's say when Trump's out of here, I think we're all going to be, all of our Google searches are going to be like incriminating to some degree and we're doomed.
	Let's go extreme.
	What if he was a member of an actual Nazi group?
	I know your first instinct is, well, fire him.
	But the pretense is if you are in, like, what if he's a Satanist?
	That's probably easier for liberals to digest.
	Should he, can he not be a cop?
	Because the implications are interrupting.
	But the implication is if he's a Satanist and then he sees some priest dying, he's going to just go die, bitch.
	Or not going to want to work on a case that's pro-Christian.
	So the argument with the Nazi thing is if you're a firefighter, you won't go save a black family's, you'll let a black family's home burn.
	I don't believe that to be true.
	And good thing is it's not a one-man job.
	You have your peers around.
	Well, Marty can't come.
	He's racist.
	So it's a black part of town.
	So let's get John on.
	Yeah, I'll catch you on the way back.
	I'll put on some burgers.
	Even that totally extreme scenario, which isn't the case here, is still dumb.
	Like there was an EMT who got fired for being a proud boy.
	And they were honestly saying that he wouldn't service people of color.
	That's the Shane Gillis.
	And let them die.
	The Shane Gillis.
	I'll tell you what.
	Sketch all of them.
	These Hasidic Jewish EMTs.
	I have seen them with my own eyes do that.
	I saw them go up to an accident where a Hasidic guy and a black guy were in a car accident, and the black guy was messed up, and they walked past him to the Jewish guy.
	Wow.
	So they shouldn't be allowed to do EMT.
	They clearly have ethnic preferences.
	But you don't really see it outside of a really solid group like Hasidic Jews or Amish or black Hebrew Israelites.
	Really cut off cultural.
	The Proud Boys is just the water buffaloes that Fred and Barney are in.
	Yes, they get into fights when people attack them.
	They saved Ann Coulter's life last week.
	There is so little to try to attach onto the Proud Boys to do anything, doing anything wrong that that's why they hit our guys so hard because they just got nothing.
	They knew that another thing like this was not going to happen.
	So they're like, well, even though this isn't bad, let's try to make it something.
	Yeah.
	Well, look at Roger Stone.
	You know what I want to do?
	I want to put together a video on how to red pill liberals.
	There you go.
	Because there's a few things you can do.
	They're like magic pills.
	Here's just off the top of my dome.
	One, you explain to them that illegal immigration only benefits rich white people in both countries.
	The Vincente Foxes and the Carlos Slims of Mexico.
	I think Carlos is Lebanese.
	And the rich white CEOs of America.
	It hurts the poor.
	So that gets the race shit out of their heads.
	Another magic button, David Shortel.
	Just throw that name out.
	How was he at Roger Stones?
	We talked about this yesterday.
	That's the Aaron thread that unravels the whole sweater.
	How did CNN know the FBI was going to be there within 15 minutes?
	15 minutes.
	Oh, that's a stupid inside joke with myself.
	Yeah, what is that?
	It's so dumb.
	You looked at me like I should know.
	I had an air hockey table in my house.
	And when you start a game, it says, game set, 15 minutes.
	You're supposed to know what my air hockey table says.
	And then the third one, did Jeffrey Epstein kill himself?
	Those all come across as apolitical, and it's a good way to just get them sort of at least skeptical of authority.
	That's my real beef here.
	That's really the purpose of this show: to encourage people to question authority.
	If you see your niece drunk at school, handle it.
	Don't go to an administrator.
	What the fuck?
	Oh, and you know what else I heard about that?
	The administrator was some affirmative action hire, some chick who had been on the job for a week.
	Wait, one more time.
	I'm sorry.
	You're looking up air hockey tables.
	Don't.
	Okay.
	The woman who fired him had been on the job for a week.
	Oh, another minor detail.
	And this isn't that important, but it is to the community.
	He's brought that high school to the state championships like 12 times in a row.
	So they're a legendary football team.
	Probably because they're all black.
	That's true.
	Okay.
	So before, I wanted to catch up on some mail today.
	How are we doing for time?
	We got plenty of time, right?
	How are we doing for Dod?
	How are we doing for Dode?
	Very good.
	Meaning of the word normal.
	Yeah.
	Right?
	Traditionally, nature imposes boundaries on us.
	If I were to say, hey, you know what?
	I'm going to, I feel like I'm a doad.
	And I start jumping around.
	Well, normal.
	It's better than I remembered it.
	That's what I'm saying.
	It's just, it's never like that.
	Dod.
	It's like, how would you spell that?
	T-C-H-O-D-E.
	No, T-C-H-O-D-T-E.
	Doad.
	Dod, doad.
	Doad, doad.
	Play it again.
	Okay.
	Let's make it a soundbite.
	Yes.
	Oh, man.
	He says it a few times, doesn't he?
	Twice.
	Traditionally, nature imposes boundaries on us.
	If I were to say, hey, you know what?
	I'm going to, I feel like I'm a toad.
	Now, what if I were to tell you that I'm a road?
	Folks at home, if you're trying to do a Dinesh toad and you don't like that crazy spelling I just did, just do D-O-D-E.
	Dode.
	Doad.
	Right?
	Doad.
	And I start jumping around in a pond.
	Well, most of you will think, that is crazy Dinesh thinks he's a toad.
	We have to, I want to riff on that somewhat like things that rhyme where he's like, crazy Dinesh thinks he's a doad.
	Imagine I was a road and I was lying around on the ground and cars were driving over me and I had yellow paint on me.
	You would say, oh, that's crazy Dinesh lying on the road getting mauled by vehicles.
	Now, whatever.
	We just got to keep riffing on toad or that thing.
	You didn't like that, did you?
	Well, you reminded me that Abbos are so useless that they have to have commercials in Australia telling them not to sleep on the road.
	Kidding me.
	Wow.
	Did you not know this?
	No.
	So ABBOs, I think, is their N-word.
	You're not supposed to say that, but Australian Aboriginal people.
	Why can't you say ABBOS?
	It's just an abbreviation of Aboriginals.
	Or Japs.
	There's way too many syllables in Aboriginals.
	Yeah, Japs.
	Japs.
	In the army, they call Pakistanis the PACs.
	That's not PAKIS.
	Packy doesn't seem that bad to me.
	How about Nazi?
	Calling someone a Nazi, I think that is arguably as bad as, if you will, the N-word.
	I mean, it ruins your career.
	It gets you fired from your entire career.
	I think he's done with law enforcement.
	And it trivializes the Holocaust.
	Yeah.
	And actual Nazis who actually killed folks.
	Yeah.
	Weird.
	Terrible.
	And trivializes the victims.
	Boy, you're not.
	Americans have trouble with words like trivializing.
	Trivialize.
	Tribalized.
	What are you trying to find right now?
	Oh, yeah.
	Aboriginal sleeping.
	I didn't know.
	Hey, guys, don't sleep on the road.
	It's dangerous.
	I don't have to tell my six-year-old.
	We need to keep ourselves and our countrymen safe.
	You never know when a car is going to come along.
	Actually, you sleep on the road.
	Not for sleeping, for playing around.
	Why would you sleep on the road?
	Never sleep on the road, it says.
	Because Darwinism.
	Is it because there's less bugs or something?
	There's more of a breeze?
	Maybe it retains warmth.
	Sleep on the road?
	Let's get road safety right.
	Authorized by the Northern Territory Government.
	Yeah, there's tons of those.
	Wow.
	That's usually how you can tell that a culture is in trouble.
	When they have commercials that say, don't sleep on the road, or in India, please don't shit all over the place.
	Now, if you have a TV and you're still sleeping on the road, like that commercial shouldn't point out.
	Do they watch the commercial?
	Do they, I don't know, that's too much.
	I don't want a West.
	The West is the best.
	By the way, speaking of the West is the best, some student sent me a video and he's arguing in his class about Proud Boys and Western chauvinism.
	And I don't think the teacher knows what chauvinism means.
	It doesn't mean sexism.
	It means extreme patriotism, nationalism, extreme fervor, passion.
	So you can be a donut chauvinist and it just means you're obsessed with donuts.
	We are Western chauvinists in that we think the West is the best.
	So he said, the teacher said, yeah, but Western means mostly European.
	And I'd argue that, by the way.
	And that's mostly white.
	So if you're a Western chauvinist, you're a white supremacist.
	And I thought, well, first of all, I don't take that for, I think the West includes Israel, Australia, the ABCs of South America, Argentina, Brazil, Chile, a lot of different countries, Canada, and of course America.
	And America is the best in the West.
	And America is only, what, 75% white?
	But anyway, that's the Nazi glasses, Nazi glasses, where everything is racial to you.
	And the reason this is a logical fallacy is simple.
	We don't choose the West based on race.
	We choose it because, especially America, it's based on self-determination, liberty, freedom, grit, busting your ass, working hard.
	The beauty of America is you can be a fucking retard, but if you bust your ass, you're going to be making $100,000 a year.
	Now, it'll take maybe 10 years, but I don't care if you're sweeping a bodega, if you work your ass off and get above 60 hours a week, in 10 years you'll be making 100 grand.
	Cops, firemen, get in a union, plumber, electrician, start out with a trade.
	That dude who we had on the show, the black guy, who's cleaning medical equipment, I guarantee after 10 years, he'll be making 100 grand a year.
	That's another reason why welfare just handicaps people.
	It's like if you're just rolling around in a scooter all your life, never using your legs.
	You're no farther.
	If you sweep a bodega for three days, your boss goes, Wow, that guy's a hard worker.
	Maybe I'll give him some sweat equity on the new bodega I'm opening, and he can be like 10% owner if he opens and closes it, and I don't have to worry about it.
	So you're farther ahead with those three days of sweeping.
	There's welfare, it's just groundhog day.
	You're always back to zero, always back to zero.
	Always got to be pumped for your job.
	And you're a fucking loser.
	People that work in Duncan, like, I don't know what happens where there's something where they get the job, they tell their mother, you know, they're about like a 17-year-old inner city kid.
	They don't really want to work there, but they're excited they got the job.
	When they get the paycheck, they're happy.
	And then somewhere down the line, they're just like, fuck this.
	And then they just treat you like shit.
	They don't work really well.
	It's just like, I go to, you know, in Harlem, that stop on Harlem 125th, that Wendy's is just, it's like the Congo.
	It's just fucking, people are throwing shit in the back and like, did that sound racist?
	Because it had Congress?
	Yeah, that did sound really racist.
	But I'm not done with my analogy.
	The point I was making is, say you love chess, and people go, well, you're clearly a Russian supremacist.
	And you go, what?
	How?
	Well, most professional chess players are Russian.
	So if you like chess, then you're a Russian supremacist.
	But no, I like the game.
	I never even thought about who are the majority of good players.
	Well, too bad.
	You think Russians are better than other people.
	You know what I think of that?
	By the way, the person that should not be mentioned anymore, QT, are his initials?
	We said we'll never talk about again.
	He was on the Tyra Bank show because he likes feet so much.
	And Tyra had this whole foot thing, and he farts in that video.
	So it's kind of like a merging of the worlds.
	Good to know.
	Yep.
	All right, should we go over some mail?
	We shall.
	We're way behind.
	Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mail back.
	Let me touch it.
	Good afternoon, Gavin and the retard.
	Me.
	That would be you, I guess.
	Holy shit, is college a waste of time and money.
	I went to community college for two years in order to figure out a major and save money.
	I mistakenly decided to go into finance in order to impress some girl and transferred to Boston College, mistake number one, as an econ major, mistake number two, and was recruited to run track, mistake number three.
	Thanks to Title IX, the men's track team did not get scholarships, but the women's team did.
	You know what Title IX is, right?
	Where it's purported to be a thing where women should have the right to be part of sports.
	But that's the premise they start out with.
	But what it really is, is affirmative action socialism, forcing women's sports to be as popular as men's sports.
	And it's just not.
	Women aren't as good at sports.
	Sorry.
	Look at women's basketball versus men's basketball.
	Now imagine the government forced women's basketball to be as big as men's basketball.
	Like, what do you do?
	Pay people to go watch it?
	So I had to foot the bill.
	Here at the prestigious institution, I essentially took out a mortgage to pay $160,000 for two and a half years of education.
	$160,000.
	Like $80,000 a year is a very good salary.
	You can live in Manhattan on that and be like a guy who goes to restaurants and is never short of cash.
	Where I learned queer theology.
	Apparently, Jesus was in fact transgender.
	Male athletes are rapists.
	I refused to go to any consent classes that were mandatory for male athletes.
	And was taught theoretical economics by professors who read off PowerPoint slides and had never actually worked in the field in which they taught.
	Yeah, I'd imagine finance is one of those things where that whole, if you can't do, teach, is in overdrive.
	Because if you're good at finance, you're just being less.
	I'm being good at it, if you will.
	I will.
	The Sutton Body was also repugnant, composed of rich kids, had no worldview or were guilty about their white privilege, while minorities on campus, minus the rather wealthy Asians, felt compelled to shout out their oppression.
	I cannot remonstrate.
	I don't know that word.
	I'll Google it.
	No, I'll look it up because you're the retard, according to this.
	Remonstrate.
	Make a forcefully reproachful protest.
	Huh.
	So how is it different from demonstrate?
	Because it's in protest.
	And demonstrate is, I guess, to show somebody, and then remonstrate is to.
	What is the difference between demonstrate and remonstrate?
	Despite all the protests you hear from big tech, there's simple privacy, blah, blah, blah, blah.
	Sorry.
	They are unrelated, so the difference is everything.
	Demonstrate means to explain something by showing or exhibiting.
	Remonstrate means to forcefully protest about something.
	So a demonstration is a bunch of people remonstrating.
	Okay, sorry.
	I'm sorry I'm such a toad.
	I agree with you that college is meant for those who want to go into STEM or perhaps a savant who wants to go into something else.
	May this be a warning to all.
	Yeah, I hate school.
	You know what?
	I took English.
	I could have just got a syllabus on Amazon or anywhere on the internet and bought like Dickens and all the classics.
	I'm reading fucking books from fiction like Wuthering Heights and then discussing it at infinitum.
	What the fuck am I doing?
	Dickens was considered like a soap opera guy and Americans in New York would wait on the pier for the next chapter to come so they could see what happened to Sally or Heathcliff.
	It was like it was soap opera.
	So I was just, I have a degree in soap operas from the turn of the century.
	Good work, school.
	Luckily, it was in Canada and there was no, I had no debt.
	My tuition was $1,400 a year and I worked as a janitor at the college.
	So I paid off my tuition as it came in.
	Anyway, so he goes on and on.
	You know, this reminds me, too.
	Not only is...
	What?
	Being a janitor.
	Did you happen to be able to pay that off?
	Is that one of many people that was able to do that?
	It was just a job and I was already at school, No, there's no program.
	I got a job.
	Oh, okay.
	But you know what he did?
	He hated us because we were middle class and he thought we didn't work hard enough.
	He was a brutal alcoholic.
	One time I lost all of the keys for the whole school.
	You know, that giant ring that has like 700 keys on it.
	I just lost it.
	Wow.
	And he couldn't deal with it.
	So he drank a bottle of booze and stayed in the office all night.
	So when we came in at five in the morning, ready to, I don't know, try to find out how to open any of the doors, he's just like, Do you mind telling me how you lose every single key in the school?
	And then he went and hugged the secretary after yelling at me, and he crushed her ribs.
	So he was put on temporary leave.
	Wow.
	Yeah.
	And then they signed a petition to get him back, but the petition was started by the bar on campus and all the local bar flies who go to that bar.
	So it didn't make him look very good.
	All the alcohol salesmen want him back.
	It is a disaster.
	You know what he did?
	He thought, I'm going to fucking get third world Negroes next year.
	I'm firing all these fucking white assholes, these middle-class kids, and I'm going to get all just like third world hard workers.
	So anytime he saw an African-looking name or kind of any kind of Hispanic or weird name, he signed them up.
	But if you're from another country and you're going to college in America or Canada, you're paying full price, like 60 grand.
	So they're all aristocrats.
	Yes, they're from Africa.
	They're from the United Nations.
	So they'd have ascots and suits on and smoke a pipe.
	And they were black, but they also spoke like, hell, how are you?
	So I understand you want us sweeping.
	What do we use?
	What is this broom you speak of?
	Anyway.
	And I like, they act like royalty, basically, because they might be.
	When I worked at that hostel.
	They is!
	They is royalty!
	Like, you will have my bugs and bring them to my room.
	You ever see?
	I'm not doing that.
	It's not part of my job, if you will.
	You ever see Mugabe's kids on Instagram?
	Zimbabwe is gone.
	It was Rhodesia.
	They killed all the farmers, as they're doing in South Africa.
	Ran out of food.
	Everyone died.
	Total fucking chaos.
	Their dollar bill was, I think it was $14 million in Zimbabwe for a cheeseburger.
	Meanwhile, the kids of Zimbabwe are running around the world with fucking diamond Rolexes.
	Yep.
	Socialism works for the children of the leaders.
	You know who else is like this is the head of Venezuela's...
	Robert Mugabe Jr.'s Batmobile.
	These pigs.
	Yeah, Villichez, Herve Villichez's daughter is worth, I think, $3.5 billion.
	And people are eating cats.
	Yet you go to school and everyone is a fucking socialist.
	But sorry, that guy with the college letter reminded me of these feckless conservatives.
	So I'm always accused of condoning violence when I say fight back.
	We are living in such a time of fear.
	We're so scared of confrontation that we don't behave like normal human beings.
	Maybe it's because there's cameras on us at all times.
	But I just see these college conservatives.
	Remember the guy we were making fun of yesterday who she grabs his paper that says all lives matter, hits it at him, and then he puts his hands in his pockets and he goes, call the police.
	Which even he thinks that's brave.
	Like, I'm going to actually file charges.
	I'm a badass.
	But I've noticed this with college conservatives.
	They're all pussies.
	If you have a table out, this is 1.7.
	If you have a table out and you've got all your things and they're not racist, it's not a bunch of swastika patches and how to lynch, a little handbook.
	It's just like American flags and things about liberty and the trouble with socialism, which we just saw with our own two eyes, the trouble with socialism, right?
	These billionaire heirs to the corrupt dictators.
	That's all he's trying.
	He's actually trying to help them.
	He's trying to educate them.
	And if you were smart and you were a socialist and you didn't like that, you could argue with him.
	But this is how they treat college conservatives.
	And I'm mad at the conservatives in this video.
	You're a press man.
	You have common sense.
	You got into the school, but obviously you're dumb as fuck.
	I got to know if you can talk to me.
	You want to win on a time menu?
	Look, they're taking her table down.
	And because she's never had a real job, she doesn't know how those tables work.
	Like, she's never done anything with her legs.
	Look, she can't quite figure it out.
	What do you just kick at it?
	Is that how it works?
	See that little ring that's preventing the hinge?
	Yeah, you move that.
	It's just basic physics.
	Right.
	Maybe you should take a course in folding tables at your college.
	Go.
	Got that one down.
	Oh, it's not going all the way.
	Huh.
	She just helps her?
	She's like, you know, I can't watch this.
	It's a two-person job.
	It's weird, too, seeing the Asians jump in on this.
	Like, we're sick of your racism, too.
	We're not here just to build the railroads.
	Like, you're the most successful ethnic group in the country.
	You're like seven places above whites as far as successful ethnicities.
	And you're like, I'm sick of this oppression.
	I'm sick of our average income being twice the average American salary.
	Look, they just give up.
	Ah, well, I can't fold it.
	And they walk away.
	But look, she's just taking all this shit.
	Now, here's the question, folks at home.
	What do you do?
	Keep showing it.
	What do you do?
	I would take my phone off the table, first of all.
	Off the taboo?
	Off the taboo.
	That's a bad symbo.
	Look, she's just taking all this shit and throwing it.
	Now, she's not stealing it.
	She's throwing it in the box.
	So what do you do when someone's doing that?
	Obviously, I know people at home are like, fucking punch her in the face.
	Well, you're going to get an assault charge, blah, blah, blah.
	But I would say the thing that you should do is go around to the other side of the table and say, stop, stop.
	And if she keeps reaching for it, shove her.
	Don't you think?
	Or you could just make her shove you by creating a human barrier like this.
	They keep going.
	Look, they're screaming.
	That woman wants to be black so bad.
	She's like the whitest.
	What is this?
	Let's hear what she has to say.
	I want to say that the fact that y'all are comfortable to even do this means that we're not doing enough.
	Every single shot is not even right to begin.
	Just pause.
	Did you hear that?
	The fact that you're even comfortable doing this, he's not having a Klan rally.
	Yeah.
	Shows that we have a lot of work to do.
	And every time these people do this, we need to just pack it up.
	What if somebody said that to Martin Luther King?
	They said, you know, the fact that you're even comfortable with holding a march for freedom?
	Look at his Mercedes-Benz jacket.
	Pack it up.
	Look at her.
	That tall chick.
	She's ready to throw down.
	Look at that pussy with the hood.
	Get them out of your face.
	You know what else you should do in this kind of scenario?
	Is be loud.
	Bark at them.
	Like, get the fuck out of my face.
	Get back.
	You have to establish authority.
	When you're sitting there sheepishly looking down and just filming passively, they're going to overpower you.
	This is not a safe situation, by the way.
	I don't know what I would do.
	I don't think anybody's reasonable.
	I don't know.
	Nothing is not the answer.
	Look, it's always nothing.
	They're always doing nothing.
	I wouldn't be there in the first place.
	People can't, it's just, He probably has to clear it with the school.
	He did.
	Look at her.
	Yeah, why are you shaking?
	Bob's shaking.
	You're fucking pussy.
	You're not black just because you braided your hair.
	If she was to just comb her hair straight, no one would know she's black.
	She's not.
	She's like Dominican or something.
	Okay, this is it.
	This is what I...
	No peace.
	No racist.
	Police.
	No justice.
	You catching this?
	The police are racist for protecting him.
	So he's racist for being Republican, and then the police are racist for not arresting him, for being a Republican.
	I mean, the country's 50% right-wing, is it not?
	You know what I would say?
	I'd say I will leave right now if you tell me who the Prime Minister of Canada is.
	I'm happy to leave.
	Just tell me what capital gains tax is.
	Right.
	Or what it is in America or the state of whatever state they're in.
	Yes.
	Tell me the difference between the Constitution and the Bill of Rights, and I'm gone.
	What is the last amendment of the Constitution?
	Name any amendment besides the first two.
	The right to kiss my ass.
	That's what you'll hear.
	No racist, no police, no justice, no police.
	Are you standing here to watch?
	We got coffee for people.
	Hey, you have some coffee?
	Talk to us.
	Look, this is it.
	They just played it.
	Go back.
	No justice to me.
	They just shut down.
	You're actively morning against me.
	You want me to protect it?
	Because you shut down it from the vet.
	You don't even know me.
	You know nothing about me.
	I didn't know he was white.
	That's the money shot.
	Great point.
	You're white.
	End of discussion.
	I mean, does that sum it up or what?
	We're arguing with retards.
	There's no need to waste the wisdom.
	We're arguing with racists.
	That's the irony of all this.
	The reason they don't like him is because he's a white male.
	They are racist and sexist.
	That's the irony of all this.
	I'm sitting here pushing for equality and freedom, and they don't want it.
	These kids are socialists.
	They want to be oppressed.
	They want tyranny.
	They want Zimbabwe.
	They want Venezuela.
	You know, my little red pill trick is that I'm saying, let's say everything that white people have ever done, black people did.
	You know, slavery and all that, everything was reversed.
	Should we take, should we stop any sort of, should we be racist?
	Should we treat white people the way we treat black people?
	Should we flip that around, you know?
	I've talked to them about that.
	They say yes all the time.
	What they want, they don't want equality.
	They want revenge.
	Right.
	So it's sort of like the Indians and that girl, Lexi Page.
	Remember that story?
	Oh, geez.
	So she was removed from her family.
	I can't watch this without waterworks.
	She was removed from her family because she's like a 25th American Indian and they found a family that has another, they're not Indians, but one of the kids they adopted is also like a 25th.
	So let's put her in this home and now we have a 12.5th Indian.
	It's like the repatriation, bringing Indians together.
	No one wanted this, but the state did it.
	And she was torn from her family who loved her, including the family's real kids.
	They saw Lexi as her sister.
	Oh, and when Lexi arrived, she had a black eye when she was two.
	They took her in, raised her for like six years, I think.
	And then the state took her away because she's Indian.
	Oh, they're.
	This is a tough one to watch, man.
	To all our supporters, you are true angels on earth.
	I can't watch this.
	Yeah, that's bad.
	The worst is seeing the kids cry.
	That's pretty bad.
	And I don't, I was going to say they don't understand.
	I don't understand.
	But the reason I brought that up is because I was reaching out because I think she's Cherokee or something.
	And the lawyer, I had the lawyer on my old show who was representing them.
	I said to the lawyer, how do you not just ball your eyes out?
	That's right.
	Yeah, I remember that interview.
	And they were appealing to the tribe because if the tribe said, we don't give a shit about this, why are you doing this?
	That would be, that would have a lot of gravitas.
	And the tribe said that we're not interested.
	Basically, the subtext I got from the tribe, I forget what tribe it is, but the subtext was, fuck you.
	Choctaw.
	Choctaw, that's it.
	You fucked us.
	500 years ago, now we're fucking you.
	How does that feel, bitch?
	Really bad.
	Yeah.
	Well, we were torn from our families.
	Yeah, I know.
	That was bad too, though.
	What are you doing?
	Is this some eye for an eye bullshit?
	400 years apart?
	And by the way, you know who's suffering more than any of these people?
	Is Lexi Page?
	The fucking eight-year-old.
	Lost the six-year-old girl they had raised as their daughter for more than four years.
	That's crooked.
	Revenge.
	Anyway, I have another college thing, 1-9.
	Where college conservatives are getting abused and just taking it.
	Like, get fired.
	Get in trouble.
	Be brave.
	Why are you throwing away our stuff?
	What's your name?
	What's your name?
	Why are you throwing away our stuff?
	What's your name?
	Why are you throwing away our stuff?
	So he has a poster up that says college conservatives, whatever, and at Penn State.
	They tore down the posters, threw them in the garbage, and his revenge is: What's your name?
	Why are you throwing away our stuff on the loop?
	Keep playing it?
	Why are you throwing away our stuff?
	You don't believe we should have a right to free expression?
	To advertise for our own events?
	Then why are you throwing our stuff away?
	That's vandalism, you know.
	It's destruction of property.
	It's actually even theft.
	You stole our stuff.
	What's your name?
	What's your guys' names?
	I thought you were here to technically stop this.
	Come on.
	I'm not afraid of him.
	What's your name?
	What's your name?
	I'm not afraid of him, clearly.
	Well, maybe you should be.
	Maybe you should be.
	I'm obviously not advocating for violence or punching you in the face, but don't let her take your poster.
	Get in the way of these people.
	We've lost our...
	Ooh, what are you going to do?
	Shame her?
	That's such a pussy move.
	That's such a liberal pussy move.
	I have an idea.
	You say, you know, no, listen, I'm mic'd up right now.
	There's a hidden camera.
	I'm working for ABC.
	The what would you do?
	So it would look really bad if you just are attacking a Trump supporter thing.
	Yeah, Ryan, that's really brave.
	No, it's not brave, but it's you're just treating stupid people like stupid people.
	It's like telling the kid there's a tooth fairy.
	Yep.
	So that's enough of that college one.
	Boy, we're not exactly tearing through these letters, are we?
	I got a good one about herpes.
	The guy asked me not to read this on the air.
	I won't use his name.
	Ready?
	Yes.
	How are we doing for time?
	Good.
	How long have we been talking for?
	We're over.
	Yeah, we're about 10, 15 minutes over.
	We've read one letter.
	Yes.
	This was supposed to be the letters show.
	That's correct.
	My girlfriend was diagnosed visually today with genital herpes.
	As someone who has this issue, I have a few questions.
	I had many, many, many, many, many, many sexual partners in my 15 years of meth use.
	Probably about 415 total partners.
	I am almost 38 and have never had an outbreak or anything that would have alarmed me to the fact that I have herpes.
	He's talking about something I shouldn't say.
	I'm just curious if, A, it's possible to have and carry herpes without ever seeing symptoms.
	And B, if it's possible to have a long and happy relationship with children if I do actually have it.
	Don't ignore this.
	Blah, blah, blah.
	All right.
	I have herpes.
	You can make that a gif.
	I think I got it from a girl I was dating who was a stripper, and she had been a sex worker.
	And I think I got genital herpes from her.
	But she denies it because she tested negative.
	She did porn.
	I know I really know how to pick them, don't I?
	She did porn, and you have to get tested regularly, and she was always negative for herpes.
	This is a crazy theory I have, but I think she was carrying it and didn't have it.
	Now, there's these prostitutes they had in Africa who were immune to HIV.
	And the way they got HIV was by stopping prostitution and going back to their little villages where it was allowed to fester.
	But the constant exposure to HIV actually made them immune, just like having a shot.
	So I bet they could be having the HIV, but they didn't have it.
	That's actually not a good example of the prostitutes.
	That's a different phenomenon.
	But here's the good news, sir.
	Herpes is no big deal.
	I've had every STD under the sun, gonorrhea, chlamydia.
	I haven't had Crabs, venereal warts.
	None of them are a big deal.
	Most of them are antibiotics.
	Venerea warts, you could just get sprayed with liquid nitrogen.
	Although there's now a pill you can take where you're immune to papillomavirus.
	HPV.
	HPV.
	So herpes is the worst one.
	You have an outbreak.
	It's really uncomfortable.
	And then you have another outbreak like six months later.
	But your number of outbreaks keeps doubling in time.
	Your break keeps doubling.
	So first you get it every six months, then you get it every year.
	Then you get it every two years.
	Soon you're getting it every 10 years.
	Like I had a genital outbreak.
	I probably had three in my life and they were pretty close together.
	Now it's nothing.
	I'll get a cold sore on my mouth if I'm stressed out, but that's only 10 days.
	And that shit they have at the store, at the CVS, really takes the pain off.
	It's just embarrassing to have a cold sore on your face.
	So don't worry about it, dude.
	Weird.
	Sounds like you really dodged a bullet being a mess head and only having herpes, not AIDS.
	I don't think I've ever had one SGD in my whole dang life.
	Then you're a loser.
	You haven't lived.
	I've slept with a chick or two where I was like, that was a bad one.
	You know what?
	A black guy once told me, he said, make sure you wash your dick.
	Oh, yeah.
	Right before.
	And always right after with a chick.
	I know that sounds retarded.
	I think it works.
	I always do.
	I mean, but.
	I think it works.
	Yeah, you don't want those little flakes on the side.
	I'm not sure you should be coming to me for relationship advice.
	All right, so maybe we'll do another show.
	Should be the mailbag, but let's catch up on these knockouts.
	Okay.
	This is how we're going to end the show today, just watching people get knocked the fuck out.
	Yeah.
	Oh, this is a good one.
	This is in a hot day in Harlem.
	I think it's Harlem.
	It's definitely Manhattan.
	This guy seems like a fun dude.
	By the way, just pause.
	We're about to watch a lot of knockouts.
	The guy in the white shirt's about to knock out the black guy.
	Watch his hips.
	This is one thing I'm learning about boxing.
	You see this?
	This is just the messenger.
	This is nothing.
	This is where you punch.
	That's why boxers twist their ankle when they do a right cross because it's all about this thrust.
	It's all in the hips.
	This guy is just the postman.
	The letter is written here.
	All right, watch what I'm talking about.
	You see that?
	Did you see the swivel he had?
	That's it, bro.
	Video in slow motion a couple times?
	No.
	Look at him.
	He is out.
	Dude, just stay there.
	Stay down.
	Stay down.
	I would love to knock someone out.
	It must feel so cool when someone else starts to fight.
	He's like, dude, calm down, calm down, calm down.
	You're making a big mistake.
	Like Tommy Robinson, when he's saying that guy, Mike, take it easy.
	It's going to be two hits.
	Me hitting you, you hitting the floor.
	And then he just goes, and then you just walk away.
	That's the coolest thing to do in the world.
	I like how the title of it is Dude KO'd on a hot day outside of McDonald's in New York City.
	Perfect description.
	Like, you could look that up.
	Yeah, I don't have to watch the video now.
	You know, some movies that you're talking about.
	Hey, you want to watch a video?
	Close your eyes.
	Dude knocked out in New York City in front of McDonald's on a hot day.
	You know, it'd be funny if it's like those movies that say the name of the movie in the movie.
	Where it's like, dude, you just got knocked out on a hot day outside of McDonald's in New York City.
	Motherfucker's about to get knocked out on a hot day in New York City in front of McDonald's.
	Breaks the fourth wall.
	Like, oh, that was really unfortunate.
	Okay, now you're never going to guess who gets knocked out in this one.
	Let's see.
	Let's go full screen on this one.
	Coming up.
	coming up.
	Oh, is he hearing it?
	Yeah.
	Wait, is he So he's in a chokehold.
	I think...
	I think the guy on the ground...
	I think the guy on the ground is unconscious after that chokehold.
	So that chick is pissed in the taupe slacks.
	And they don't like this security guard.
	She's had enough of his bullshit with her little Reeboks on and her denim coat.
	Look, the guy's out.
	Is he out or is he just lying there passive?
	I think he's out.
	So the security guard is saying, lady, someone get her away from me.
	Calm her down.
	Bam.
	Wow, don't do that.
	Look.
	He's out.
	Wait, what?
	Yes.
	Oh, no.
	What?
	It's just the perfect kick.
	Holy komoly.
	Yeah.
	And he's obviously got a glass jaw.
	Boom.
	Wait, let me see it again.
	God.
	Let me see it again.
	Maybe the guy's laying there passive because he disappears after this.
	Look at this.
	It's not even a forward kick.
	It's like a stop.
	And he's out.
	And then the green shirt gets up.
	He's like, no, thanks.
	I'm out of here.
	That's the end of that.
	It's like a relay race.
	You're in.
	You can see them lying in bed the next morning going, that was fucking crazy last night.
	Like the time my wife and I drank AIDS blood.
	Oh, yeah.
	I told you that story, right?
	Yeah.
	You just went up to a homeless man.
	It's the stupidest thing I've ever done.
	It's empathy.
	We're in New York City in Halloween.
	We're in the West Village.
	It's all gay.
	And they're getting wasted, as gays are wont to do.
	And I see some guy dressed as a zombie and he's going, help me, help me.
	And I can't tell if the lesion on his head is part of his costume because he had blood all over him and he was a zombie or if he really did cut his head.
	So I'm like, I'm not going to call 911 on a wasted guy with zombies.
	Corn syrup in his hair.
	So how do I tell if it's corn syrup or actual blood?
	I know.
	What a bad decision.
	I fucking drank his blood.
	You could never yell at me for any decision ever again.
	Then my wife did the same thing.
	She's like, is it corn syrup?
	We're sitting there feasting on a gay guy.
	Like actual zombies.
	We're like cannibals.
	We're like actual zombies.
	Yeah, we're drinking blood in the gay part of New York City.
	We woke up the next morning and I go, we drank AIDS blood last night and my wife had a fucking panic attack.
	Yeah, no shit.
	We should have seen your brother.
	Nah, never mind.
	We went and got checked.
	You know, my brother, we have spider crickets in the house and I paid him $100 to eat one.
	And he crunched it, ate it.
	They're big spider crickets.
	And we went to the bar later and I go, oh shit, I'm broke.
	I didn't bring any money.
	He goes, don't worry about it, dude.
	I got $100 of cricket money.
	He had his cricket money.
	No, other sane people would think he plays cricket and won a bet.
	Not that he ate a fucking cricket.
	Look at another knockout.
	Ooh, spider crickets are gross.
	The beauty of being a tree planter is I feel nothing when it comes to bugs.
	You can put a millipede up my ass.
	They don't freak me out in the middle.
	I'll pick you up on that.
	I'm fucking my wife on the wallpaper.
	So the black guy fucked the bald guy's wife.
	Can you zoom out a bit?
	Interesting.
	Yes.
	Well, it's a square, so that's literally all there is to see.
	Good.
	I'd rather do that.
	And see the border?
	Okay.
	Okay.
	He took his jacket off.
	Ooh, I hate those.
	Those are unnecessary.
	Oh, that's enough of those.
	He did fuck his wife.
	Oh, yeah.
	That's true.
	Look at this weird move.
	You don't deserve shoes.
	don't want your shoes, but you don't deserve shoes.
	Anyway, I got to...
	Owie.
	You know what was smart about that too?
	I'll get a Big Mac, please.
	Get out of there, dude.
	You might have murdered a man.
	I beat a dude down.
	I didn't eat.
	I'm still hungry.
	You're still hungry?
	More hungry.
	The smart thing about that one, though, is he just fucking...
	He didn't sit there with the...
	Let's just get it over with.
	It's definitely going down.
	I'm hungry.
	All right.
	I got to get a Big Mac.
	I need nuggets.
	This is a soccer fight.
	Who do you think is going to knock out Boom?
	Yes.
	I hate the word Boom.
	Stop.
	Pause.
	Pause.
	Bet DSI.
	Well, I'll bet you'll buck.
	Y'all take whoever you don't want.
	And you haven't seen this?
	I have seen this.
	Oh, so okay, let me see.
	So I think the guy on the right with the darker is that blue instead of the green.
	Yeah.
	Do we put the dollar up?
	Okay, go.
	Alright.
	It's time to do it.
	It's time to do it.
	You only dollar, by the way.
	No.
	Pay me now.
	Oh, man.
	Did you see the way his head went back like a dead duck?
	Okay, give me a dollar.
	All right, hold on.
	Watching.
	Just to make sure.
	Oh, yeah, okay, you did.
	Just to make sure.
	Yeah.
	So if he's not going to get up and you dropped him like a dude at my local bar, there was a liberal bartender, even though I only hang out at dive bars.
	It was weird.
	It's all blue-collar dudes, all pro-Trump.
	Oh my God, I just remembered the other day.
	Remember that chick who gave me shit?
	That's right.
	She came into the bar again, and she was carrying a Margaret Atwood book.
	And it's all dudes, old dudes, Archie Bunkers, and like white beards and shit.
	Like, what are you doing here?
	And she walks in, like it's her bar.
	And they go, hey, Chrissy, her name's Chrissy.
	They go, hey, Chrissy.
	And she goes, why is everyone so quiet in here?
	And then I go, hey, Chrissy, come on in, sit down, sweetie.
	And she goes, oh, and she looks like she's seen a ghost.
	And then she does a zombie point.
	And she goes, that's a white supremacist.
	And then all these old men are looking at her.
	And she goes, do you know you're with a white supremacist?
	And then I go, have a seat.
	And then as she's, and then she goes, oh, and then she starts leaving.
	She's shaking.
	And I go, Margaret Atwood wrote that book about Iran.
	The Handmaid's Tale is about Iran.
	It's about Muslims.
	They just switched it to Christians recently, but she was writing it about Muslims.
	Wow.
	True.
	And she storms out.
	And then the guy next to me goes, what was that about?
	And then one of the guys goes, I think she was talking to me.
	Was she talking about me?
	Basically saying he is a white spirit.
	How the hell did she know?
	Well, time to move again.
	Anyway, at that same bar, I made a bet with the bartender about Trump.
	And he said, Hillary's going to win.
	It's going to be a landslide.
	I'll bet you a beer.
	And after Trump won, I went in there to collect my beer.
	And he was kind of hesitant to give me it.
	And I got to tell you, as a dude, like, I don't care if I lose $400 here or there.
	And money's not a big thing for me.
	But if he hadn't given me that beer, I would have burned the bar down.
	Because it's not righteous.
	Like, I just can't explain how fucking angry I would have been.
	Because a man is all about his word.
	And we had a deal.
	And to violate that, it sort of goes back to what we were saying about Amy Schumer yesterday, where a man's worst fear is to be ridiculed.
	Not going through with a bet like that.
	And it also goes back to the fact that men have a job to do to maintain order.
	And you would have let order and justice slip away if you didn't punish that.
	Larry David would say that it's the beginning of chaos.
	Right.
	It's chaos.
	Very pretty, pretty.
	It's chaos.
	Yeah.
	Okay, I'll give you a chance to win your dollar back.
	All right.
	That's a fart.
	That's a thought.
	That's true.
	Let's go to the next one.
	Okay.
	All right.
	So what do we got here?
	Who are our contestants?
	We've got a shirtless dude and a guy in a plaid shirt.
	Okay, so those are our two men.
	Yep.
	Don't try to cheat by going forward.
	I'm not.
	Press play.
	Well, who do I take?
	Oh.
	Who do you take?
	You know what?
	I'm taking shirt.
	No, you know what?
	I'm taking no shirt.
	Taking no shirt.
	Okay.
	Yeah.
	Let's go.
	I should have gone with shirt.
	Too late.
	Is it though the wheel's still in spin?
	I would be nervous if I was fighting that guy.
	He looks pretty ripped, and I would probably go...
	Oh my God.
	Wait, I've seen this before.
	Unless there's more double knockouts, that's bananas.
	Look, he's unconscious, and they're fucking throwing him around.
	That's fucking poor for him.
	Go back.
	A double knockout.
	How often do those happen?
	I bet there's been like 30 in all of human history.
	More hole-in-ons than double knockouts, for sure.
	Wow.
	It looks so funny, don't you?
	This is like the straight version of the gay choreographed dance.
	But when I spar, we hit each other's face at the same time all the time.
	Because we've both been sort of feeling each other out, and then we both see an opening.
	And when you go like this, you're obviously open.
	So it's always.
	But knockout, that's something else.
	do you win a dollar?
	You said that the I lose a dollar because I picked one instead of both.
	The outcome I said was wrong.
	So I pay you a dollar.
	Well, you said the guy without the shirt would knock out the other guy, and he did.
	But the Simon was going to choose one.
	Yeah.
	Okay, let's see this.
	Is that a wash?
	Yeah, I'm keeping your dollar.
	Okay.
	There's compilations of double knockouts.
	I know, I don't care.
	I will concede or whatever.
	I went through like a thousand knockouts to bring you these.
	Oh, dude, I should have looked at the link.
	It said double knockout.
	Whoopsie doopsies.
	Pişt
	Short guys should scare you.
	Guys who take their shirts off should scare you.
	No, but then sometimes they're always getting their ass kicked, these shirtless dudes.
	It's like bluffing.
	Look, he's ready.
	The way he hiked his shirt up right there, he's ready to rock.
	And this skinny guy just keeps shoving him.
	Don't you know to be scared of short dudes?
	A short dude will kick your fucking ass.
	Their center of gravity is better, so pushing him is not going to work as good.
	You have to do like a trip push.
	I got to say, though, I wish there was more fighting in the world.
	No, I just wish I saw a really healthy way to resolve problems.
	Not stabbing, not shooting.
	Definitely not calling the cops all the time.
	And not just sitting there letting everyone just take your shit and then filming them.
	Ooh.
	It's just a normal 1980s fight.
	For fights, there shouldn't be police involved.
	should be refs and there should be rules that know if you hit Wait, stop, stop, stop.
	All right, who knocks out who?
	Sleeveless guy or shirtless guy?
	Who does the knocking out?
	Well, you've been hyping up the shirtless guy, so I'm going to say shirt guy.
	Okay.
	Even though he's a little scrawny and he's mostly been aggressive, but the other guy's kind of been.
	Shirt guy.
	I thought it was black shirt.
	Oh!
	Uh-oh!
	His head hit the pavement.
	He keeps doing that move, that picking up move.
	You duck and then you go down and you.
	That's very UFC of him.
	Uh-oh.
	Yeah, he does keep doing that.
	Ducking is...
	I learned that from Larry Barnes.
	He literally has the consistency of like when you're playing a wrestling video game and you do the same move over and over again.
	You know what Larry Barnes did, though?
	Oh, Aoi.
	He comes up to me and he goes, hey, man, this is my last week.
	I'm training Ortiz.
	I go, holy shit, he just...
	Yeah.
	Kind of a big deal.
	So I'm not going to be around.
	It was a pleasure working with you, my man.
	Go, fuck, man.
	That's a great gig.
	You're moving up.
	Holy shit.
	Well, I hope I see you again.
	And I'm going to miss you, buddy.
	He goes, yep.
	All right.
	See you around.
	And then later on, I go, so when are you starting with Ortiz?
	And he goes, what?
	I was just fucking with you, dumbass.
	You just lied.
	He does that every now and then.
	Yeah.
	He also told me he's working with the feds.
	When he got a call from like his son, he was like, hang on a second, Agent Shields.
	He just likes to practice lying.
	Like, what's a joke and what's a lie?
	Anyway, sorry.
	Let's see the next one.
	That's a lie that you're not invested in.
	Okay, this one is amazing because the guy's soul flies away.
	Oh, by the way, did you get a dollar?
	No.
	No, you owe me another dollar, dude.
	Oh, yeah, yeah.
	I gotta read it.
	I thought that one was a wash.
	Oh, and I lost because the shirt guy got knocked out.
	Yes, you're right.
	All right, last one.
	By the way, just cause you can play this at home, folks.
	You get some knockout videos, and one of you will have to have seen it.
	That's how you put these together.
	And you bet on the guys.
	We just invented a new game.
	What do you think?
	What do you think about my referee thing?
	What's your referee thing?
	Where police do not get involved in a fight.
	There are kind of just referees just around.
	Or you just fight.
	That's the way it was in the 80s.
	But wait, it was so cool.
	Cops used to take off their belts.
	Now they lose their pension for this.
	They take off their belt, they put it down, they take off their badge, and they say, let's fucking fight.
	And if you win, I guarantee I will not press charges.
	You know what that used to do?
	That used to give that cop in that community credibility.
	Right.
	They'd be like, he's a real nigga, that motherfucker.
	He's a real deal nigga.
	He's not just relying on the power that he has.
	He's over you.
	And I won.
	I beat his ass, and he just picked up his gun.
	He put his shit back on.
	It was cool.
	I like that guy.
	Now they're more likely to tell him, like, yeah, that dude is, he's a junkie, man.
	He's getting into some shit this week that's going to be real bad for the community.
	But the cops get involved if you punch them when they're knocked out already.
	The job is done, folks.
	The job is done.
	Okay, that's our last knockout video.
	Ryan's going to choose double or nothing.
	I'll give you $2.
	White shirt.
	White shirt's going to win?
	Yes.
	Okay.
	Okay, that's money.
	There's no volume for this.
	Oh, that sucks.
	Yep.
	Look, his soul flew away.
	Oh, he did a magic trick.
	Yeah, look.
	You David Blaine.
	He just instantly reincarnated and then he walked away.
	That's the best.
	Now, if I were to get bunched into a bird.
	That's kind of a good trick.
	If you feel like you're going to die, just take your soul and put it into a bird's soul, like in Game of Thrones, and just fly away.
	Oh, man.
	All right, Ryan.
	You win your money back.
	Good boy.
	Boy, cool.
	Here.
	Get fired.
	Get in trouble.
	Be brave.
	Uh-huh.
	And never stop fighting.

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