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May 28, 2021 - Flagrant - Andrew Schulz & Akaash Singh
22:08
Why Schulz HAD to Leave Miami? | Exclusive Patreon Flagrant 2 Clip
# social norms miles miami akash al bad news bears botox covid crypto cowboy cultural identity freeze pipe friendship dynamics kevin lifestyle changes lip filler mark

Andrew Schulz and Akaash Singh dissect their chaotic Miami transformation, contrasting Al's immediate Botox with the group's "crypto cowboy" financial losses. They debate culture through insults about Indian hospitality norms and mock Akash for refusing a ride home, labeling it unfriendly. The banter escalates with complaints over Mark's unannounced guests, bathroom conflicts, and personal jabs regarding appearance, ultimately highlighting how their shifting personalities and strained relationships define their new lifestyle. [Automatically generated summary]

Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Time Text
Miami Class and Lip Fillers 00:04:12
What up people?
Sheltie here and you guys are about to listen to a clip from our weekly Patreon episode.
If you want to sign up to our Patreon, support the flagrancy, support what we are doing.
Completely uncensored, flagrant content.
You go to patreon.com slash flagrant2.
With no more interruptions, here is the exclusive clip.
Yo, we really came to Miami and changed, bro.
We were like, if anybody said, yo, Miami didn't change y'all, they was lying, bro.
If they say Miami did, they are true.
Think about it.
We came down here, okay?
Al got Botox immediately almost.
Yep, right?
Immediately.
I waited till the last week.
Yep.
You got Botox immediately to come.
Didn't you get Botox immediately?
No, I waited till the last week.
You got lip filler immediately?
Yeah, that's true.
Why would I need lip filler when my lips are bigger than yours already?
Son, I will say your lips are bigger than mine now, but before we came down here, it's not.
You got lip filler, son.
Yo, dead ass, did Al get lip filler or not?
Uh-huh.
I saw it.
There are old pictures of you.
I looked at that picture when you were shredded before.
Your lips weren't even close.
Thin lip bitch.
Thin lip bitch.
You wasn't expecting that.
Becky with the braid hair.
Yo, for real, bro.
Thin lip.
You were thin-lipped.
You got fucking lip filler and you got Botox.
Okay.
Okay.
You got lip filler and Botox.
Okay.
My pants and shorts were crazy.
My pants and shorts were absolutely crazy, out of pocket.
Bought a stupid watch.
Okay.
Became a crypto cowboy.
We became crypto cowboys.
Lost half the fucking money.
Listening to this idiot.
Why would we think Indians know anything about finances, bro?
What do Indians know about finances?
Well, India broke, ain't it?
That's not a bad point.
First time here, guys.
I'm going to say it's because the rich ones come here, but yeah, whatever.
Even rich ones here, what they doing?
They getting money being doctors.
Yeah, doctors all day.
They don't know financial advice.
They don't know about financial advice, bro.
I'm not saying Scottish people know about this shit, but I'm just saying Indians, this motherfucker over here owned no Bitcoin almost.
Wow.
Wow.
Fuck.
I'm going to keep buying.
That's what they do.
That's what they do.
That's why England was like, I give up, bro.
I can't deal with these motherfuckers no more.
You can't beat it, bro.
Rubbing shit all over them.
What are we trying to do?
We're trying to come down here and we try to give them a little bit of, what do they call it?
Class.
Freedom.
Nah, they don't try to fuck with freedom.
I don't think that's culture.
Civilization?
Culture.
Civilization.
Yeah, you know what I mean?
Actually, I don't know about that because I think you're the oldest civilization, aren't you?
Yeah, and y'all's culture is boring as fuck.
Culture is just being boring.
That's all it is.
Ooh, that's an interesting take.
You guys aren't cultured.
You lack.
It just means you're boring.
What is culture to you?
You start listening to fucking symphony and then you know what fork goes in what bowl.
Go get fucked.
That's all boring.
Interesting.
Give me one bowl.
Let's party at a buffet.
Okay, are there any cultures that are fun?
Like the Indian wedding is lit, and that's a cultural thing.
But we don't just, we say that's Indian culture.
When they say a person's not cultured, much better take.
Yes.
Cultured is they're boring.
Yes.
Coming from a culture, that's a culture.
Now, when they say you lack culture, that just means you have fun.
Now, I've also heard the term cultured referred to like you know about cultures.
Oh, no, that's valid.
That's a good thing.
But you're talking about specifically like class and culture.
He's class, that kind of shit.
You're just a boring person.
Yeah, you're just a boring person.
You're just not having any fun.
You're spending a lot of money to do it.
Yo, it is the most pretentious way to say it's so pretentious.
Oh, look at the class.
Look at the, what is there's another word that I'm fucking passed.
That's another word you're talking about.
Okay, other ways that we became full Miami.
You became a fucking foodie.
I've been on that.
He's been a foodie.
He's been a food.
He was starting up.
Yo, you know how you got southern hospitality?
Yeah.
You started making reservations for people when they come in the city.
Yeah, but that's southern hospitality.
Pretentious Home Interactions 00:14:47
I'm trying to use the seam to split my ball.
Yeah, he's grabbing his clip.
Look at that pussy I just made right there, son.
Look at that.
You got that, Al?
Look at that.
I got a fat puss, son.
I got a fat.
Yo, stop licking your lips, son.
These big old juicy lips.
They go juicy smuckers.
Son, stop, bro.
You're about to give it a raspberry.
But for real, Miles, chill out.
Chill out.
Put my balls away.
Miles, I put my balls away.
Chill out.
Miles, Michael.
Chill like a lesbian.
Miles, chill.
I do look like a lesbian.
That's bullshit, bro.
I'm trying to go.
I'm dying.
Don't you look like a lesbian.
Son, Miles.
Stop.
Miles dressed like the pitcher from Bad News Bear.
Remember that little dyke bitch?
It was wrapping up her titties.
She's wrapping up her titties, playing ball, playing big bull.
She was playing baseball with the boys.
Chill, chill, Miles.
Chill.
You're just standing like it right now.
I know.
Miles, stop.
We love you, Miles.
We love you, bro.
Ain't nothing.
Hey, what?
Say what?
Go grab the movers.
Go grab the movers, man.
Come on.
Yeah, come on, you got it, man.
Come on, help him.
Yeah, good luck with that 20-footer.
He's busy posting moose hair square.
Damn.
Oh, shit.
Come on, bro.
Yo, Mari wearing Palestinian colors right now.
You are wearing Palestinian colors.
You are wearing Palestinian colors.
Yo, Miles is dressed more Jewish than you.
Unbelievable.
Think about it.
Unbelievable.
Yo, stay with your people.
Yo, yo, real talk.
Stay with your people and don't get yo, Miles dressing.
Miles dressing like a bulldyke, bro, is so funny, man.
Son is so true, dude.
It is so true.
It looks like some dyke bitch dressed up for the sandlot.
What can I play?
You swing like a girl.
Oh, my God.
Oh, thank you, Miles.
Thank you, Miles, for sacrificing.
All right, other ways that we went to yo, how did Mark totally sell out and go full Miami?
I think I sold out.
So Mark used to fake like he cared about looks.
Now he's all into it.
Oh, or he used to be like, yo, I don't care about looks, even though I get my hair dyed and shit like that.
Now this motherfucker goes to the fucking gym doc is like, yo, I don't care about getting strong.
I just want to look good.
That's all he cares about.
That's actually one.
I told him the exact opposite, but I agree with you, though.
No, you didn't.
Yeah, I told him I was on air.
He's like, oh, Mark just cares about looking good.
No, he said outcome.
No.
That's looking good.
No, he was talking about what you like to eat.
All right.
Outcome.
It was really bad.
It was really bad.
I'm like, come on, Tom.
I'm so sorry, guys.
Oh, dude.
That's for real.
That's why I'm going back to New York.
I know.
I need to.
You bought a speedster?
That's pretty Miami.
Oh, yeah.
Have you bought that yet?
I put the down payment on it.
Oh, shit.
Yeah, I have no place to park it in New York.
I don't even know where I'm going to park it.
I don't even know where I'll drive.
What changed the most?
Oh, this guy?
You think I did?
I was more than you.
Nah, I don't think.
I don't think Miami changed it, though.
What changed, man?
You think I'm putting inevitably?
I think just getting money and getting more successful is like.
I don't know.
He was getting money in New York, too.
But this motherfucker.
Yeah, I don't think I have any more money, per se.
Buying roadsters or whatever the fuck they're called.
What are they called?
Yeah.
Is it changing?
He's wearing a hotel hat right now.
It's just so old and white.
Fucking whatever that's on his wrist and shit.
Like you changed.
I changed it, bro.
I did.
He fully embraced being Hippocrates.
Yeah, you still hold each other accountable.
And it's way more fun than the hippocampus.
Of course, it's broken.
It's so much more fun.
But what's wrong with changing, though?
Aren't we all supposed to actually know what?
What is that?
What are you doing?
What do you want me to change?
Let's just still be serious for a second.
What are you talking about?
Changing.
Akash is doing drugs.
Do we punch him?
Akash.
If he came down here and started doing steroids, you might have changed the most, bro.
Akash changed the most.
I still look the same, but I can't change the shit.
You stand up for yourself.
He stands up for himself.
He got a new shirt.
He got a new shirt.
Yo, Miami was.
Oh, shit.
He got new sneakers.
Yo, Akash really changed.
Yo, you the most changed.
Don't point your toes like that.
You showing thigh meat.
I've never seen your thigh in my life.
I'm in Miami, bro.
I'm Miami.
I don't want to leave.
I love it here.
Yo, I'm a better meat.
I'm a little bit crazy, bro.
Selling out shows.
I'm a better me, though.
You got on the hems.
I got him.
You got on hips.
Keeps, keeps, keeps.
You got on keeps.
Yeah.
Dude, Akash is different.
I'm a different guy now.
You are different.
I'm going to go back to New York different.
Holy shit.
Yeah, that's like, I don't think Al is.
I think Al's regressed.
I think that's what it is.
You became 90s Al Moore, I think.
After coming down here?
Yeah.
Talk to me.
You riding around like no helmet on your scooter.
Okay.
You never invited any of us over to your place.
That's disrespectful.
Yeah, you never really did invite us.
I didn't do that shit in New York either.
No, we've been to your place.
Yeah.
I've been to my place.
I've been to your place.
Yeah.
Other times I've been.
I've been to his place in Miami.
No, in Long Island.
And we live mad close.
He didn't even tell me, son.
He came to that place.
We all hung out.
He never once mentioned that.
You wouldn't even give me a ride home.
You said he didn't want it.
I said he was 50.
No, exactly.
Because he was looking at his face.
Nah, nah, it's kind of like 50.
Can I tell you something?
Akash is a piece of shit for that.
You saw that whole interaction.
You saw that right?
That shit was foul, bro.
That shit made my stomach turn.
Please, please point out.
I know what he did, and I didn't want to just call it out.
I'm just like, all right, I barely.
I needed a ride home, bro.
And then you said, yo, do you think you could give me a ride home?
That's what you said.
Yep.
Right?
And then you went, let me see if it's on the way.
No, he said, is it on the way?
I said, let me see.
Yep.
I was being considerate.
Considerate.
So I took you up on your consideration.
Let me see if it's on the way.
I said, turn up the map.
It's on the way.
You can't go to your house without going his way.
He just said, yo, we live so close and you ain't even inviting me.
Yo, this kid is wild, bro.
Yo, he changed the most.
I'm going to go to your house.
I'm going to drop you off.
I thought Indian culture is like fighting over, son.
You think I'm an Uber driver?
That's part of it.
I'm going to drop you off in the front door.
Which is crazy because I drove you home one night.
Oh, that shit is so far, dude.
I went past.
I did 30 minutes out, 30 minutes back.
Yeah.
The white man.
Yeah.
Yo, Akash is mad white.
That shit is so white of you, bro.
I'm checking.
That shit is so fucking white of you, dog.
Yo, this is incredible, bro.
You couldn't even give Al a ride home.
You want to ride home, you bitch.
I asked.
You fucking asked.
I asked.
You did ask.
Yo, say, yo, but you know why you said if it's not too much of a convenience?
Because when you asked for it, Akash looked at you like, don't ask me.
I didn't want to give him no ride home.
Exactly.
I know.
I got the energy.
You gave him a look, the energy.
He was like, yo, can you be out of it?
And he was like, all right, let me.
He said, they say, oh, you ready to go now?
Like, he was doing everything to say no.
Why didn't you give him a ride home, bro?
That's your man.
It's right there.
It's on the way.
What'd you have to get home to?
Get yelled at?
I was in a rush to get yelled at.
Among other things.
What else?
I have work to do, believe it or not.
Come on, bro.
We got Kevin here right now.
I got to do some shit.
You couldn't wait 15 minutes to film it in your house.
I would rather not.
You see?
Wow, bro.
Wow.
That's great.
I guess the verdict is out.
It's like Akash changed the most, bro.
And I thought he changed the least.
The lights went out because y'all all lying on me.
The lights went out.
I said, I won't tolerate.
And then we back on.
Yeah.
See, you trying again.
The lights flickering.
That's God.
Yo.
That's God saying get it together.
No, that's God saying you change.
That's God saying get it together.
God put your light out.
No, buddy.
God put your light out.
Hey, God lighting up.
This little light of mine.
I'm going to let it shine.
This little light of mine.
I'm going to let it shine.
This little light of mine.
I'm going to let it shine.
Let it shine.
Let it shine and shine.
Let it shine.
No rhythm, Al.
Go to church.
Go to a black church.
I'm trying to help them out because he was off.
So I was like, oh, let me clap like an old white lady.
You clap like what you fuck.
See, I was trying to help myself.
That's why.
Hold on, I'm tired of turning now.
Out of the Spin cycle.
And you let him get a little momentum.
Al, you let him get a little momentum.
No, we was jamming.
You lay your hands down.
I'm with you.
We was banging on them.
They were jamming.
You were jammering.
He's losing Steve right now.
And now we're back at neutral.
Anybody's game right now.
It's really a game.
Yeah, and I'm a bag in the wind.
Whoever got the next banger, I'm all on board.
Jesse, what can I attack right now?
Holy shit.
Come on, Mark.
Mark is scared right now.
Come on now.
Yo, Agas, can I say what you told me yesterday about how you gave me such a hard time that I wouldn't let Miles stay in my place for months on end?
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, my God.
Now you have people staying at your house, right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And how is that going at home?
That's stressful.
It is stressful.
Why, why, why?
We got two dudes staying over.
Okay.
And I didn't really tell my girl they were coming.
Close friends, really close friends.
No, one is a close friend.
She has less of a problem with that one.
The other one was Kevin.
And I was like, yo, he's coming down.
Sad.
You better say his name, bro.
No, Kevin.
Could have kept both of them good.
Kevin and I are close.
But she doesn't know him.
Like, she met him once.
And also, he takes up a lot of space.
He's got seven feet tall.
Yeah, guy, seven feet tall.
That's a full ass man.
And she was just like, we got no food.
How much does this guy eat?
I don't know.
He's seven feet tall.
I'm like, yeah, we're going to be fine.
Don't worry about it.
And then very quickly, she was like, this is just a lot of dudes right now.
And I wasn't ready for this.
But they still there.
That's a little wild.
Yeah, but I feel like we're Indian.
You just let people stay at your place.
Oh, another Indian question I actually had.
All right, guys, we're taking a break from this exclusive Patreon clip because you need to smoke weed better.
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Now, let's get back to this screw exclusive Patreon clip.
Hold on, we're not leaving this.
Yeah, we're not leaving.
Yeah.
Come on, son.
I got confused.
There's a lot of mutual man.
I'm growing show off.
I'm growing show all the time.
I thought it was NPR.
I thought it was NPR.
Oh, damn.
Come on, Todd.
Damn, come on, Todd.
Oh, come on, son.
All you had to do was just flip it.
Come on.
We had it.
It was so ready, too.
Oh, my God.
We had iPods right where he wanted us.
You peaked eight years ago, bro.
Yeah, let's go.
Follow me with the overnight.
Oh, yeah.
Swing them hips.
Yeah, coming up to the mound.
Coming up to the mound.
Leslie.
Yo, where'd my hat go?
Oh, I threw that shit all the way over.
Hey, hey, I'm going to let it shine.
But you gave me so much shit for not letting Miles stay in my place.
Yeah, but you didn't let him stay.
Yeah, of course not because I recognize that it's more important to keep my wife happy, bro.
Well, that makes one of us.
No, that's better.
That's different.
Two dudes versus one, huge difference.
And he had his own room.
No, they don't have their own room.
He didn't have his own room.
He didn't have his own room.
She goes to the kitchen like she has to see one another and shit like that.
It's a thing.
It's a bit of a thing.
Different.
Bro, we have to share a bathroom.
How long?
Hold on.
How long are they staying?
We're out today.
But how long have they been there?
Sunday.
What day is it?
Friday.
Yes, it's a lot.
I'm with your girl on that one.
That's absolutely.
I completely agree.
I'm also with your girl, which is why I'm also.
We didn't ask.
I'm also with my girl when it comes to letting Miles stay.
Savvy didn't ask.
Why are you still talking?
Yeah, I know.
The reason why your shit makes no sense is because you have roommates.
Exactly.
Yeah, so it's like roommates to have a little bit more roommates ain't a big deal.
No.
And you moved him out here.
You were the one that was like, yo, Miles, come out here.
It's another room.
I feel the time to turn it.
You snut yourself up for this, Mark.
You didn't protect yourself from all of us.
I'm let my hands down.
Light of mine.
Hey, I'm going to let it shine.
This is a light of mine.
I'm fucked.
I'm going to let it shine.
I'm fucked.
This is a lot of mine.
I'm going to let it shine.
Shadow, Mark.
Shadow Mark.
Shadow Mark.
Yeah.
What did I do?
Okay.
Miles.
Miles grabbed the mic.
You can't stand with your dick, bro.
Let's go.
Say that shit.
Say that shit.
Hold on.
Say that shit.
He's looking at me.
Honest Changes with Tushar 00:03:08
I don't know who it is.
Coming at that shit.
Fuck that shit.
Usually he can go in his dyke bar and tell the story.
Hang around.
But the dyke bitch is drinking Paps Blue Ribbon.
Like, Mark will never let me stand.
Oh, yeah, one more time, Patricia.
He was spitting lips the whole time.
He was like, come on, Mark.
Where's the oats, bro?
That's how he was.
I didn't want to stay.
Go, Mark.
Go, Mark.
I mean, go, Miles.
Go.
Yeah.
I was just going to say, that's the blackest I've ever seen LB.
He was clapping real good, bro.
Okay, I got it.
We're on board.
All right.
That's it.
That's not.
I knew that that was going to be slow.
I knew that that was going to slow.
Miles, you really stopped us to say that Miles.
Yo, let me tell you something.
That's the most softball shit.
The way he underhanded that comment, bro.
That's a good point.
And he didn't even do the fast wind up joint.
He did the high lob.
They did the high lob on that.
Shit.
Thanks for getting me out, Miles.
Appreciate it.
Bro, we had him.
But in all seriousness, this is our last episode down here in Miami.
So let's get it all out right now.
You brought a seven-foot man that your girl don't even know.
Yeah.
Probably got a huge dick with the big dang-a-lang.
Big dick, bro.
Using up all the towels.
Yeah.
You got your other friend, the Indian teeny towel.
Touchar.
Oh, I know Tushar.
Yeah.
Don't I know Tushar?
Okay.
So don't I know him?
We've hung out for hours on end.
Yo, can I be honest?
You've changed.
Can I be honest?
You have changed so much, bro.
He doesn't remember people anymore.
Yo, wow.
What a metamorphosis.
Can I be honest with you?
Indian names are.
I know you're trying, but I ain't never let it happen.
What do you mean?
I don't even wanna.
I ain't gonna be like, why aren't you going with me?
Because I'm afraid he'll turn it back over.
You're finger like that.
I don't know.
Let me show you how this is done.
No, but I will say this with Indian names, it's similar to Game of Thrones in that, like, the names were so different.
You know, you first started watching, and you're like, Tyrion, what's Tyrion?
Like, I don't know.
All the names are so different, I confuse the names.
Right.
I know who Tushar is.
Yeah.
Okay.
Touchar.
Tushar.
Yeah.
I know Tushar.
Yeah.
Tushar.
Yeah.
That's the actual guy that gave us all COVID, by the way.
Wow.
You a snitch, bro.
Came to mind.
Well, he told Mark yesterday.
That's why I felt like it was okay to share.
Because the second he met Mark yesterday, he goes, Buddy, I gave you COVID.
Those opening words.
Yeah.
I knew it was him.
Yeah.
How'd you know?
He's been in your body, bro.
I know it was him.
He's been inside.
Tushar has been in your body.
I know he has, and I knew it was him.
How'd you know?
He's from Alabama, right?
Yeah.
I knew it was him.
How'd you know?
I mean, you did tell it.
You told us.
Yeah.
I told you off shit.
No, you thought it was off air.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But then when he yelled at Mark, I was like, he don't mind if people know.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, you're, oh, you're coming out for the first time on air.
Yeah, All right, guys, you just listened to a clip from our weekly Patreon episode.
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