Andrew Schulz, Alex, and Ed attempt to curate a Thanksgiving clip for the free feed but fail due to chaotic "gas shit" involving Benson's gratitude, veganism, and Ed's explicit thanks to his father's large penis. After dismissing sincere answers as overly Christian, the group pivots to celebrating "flagrancy," culminating in a promotion for their Patreon community where listeners must choose between being part of the "illest community" or labeling themselves as social justice warriors. Ultimately, the segment highlights the show's commitment to unfiltered humor over traditional holiday wholesomeness. [Automatically generated summary]
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Uplifting Celebration of Friends00:02:55
Guys, what's up?
It's Schultz.
I'm gonna be honest with you.
We're listening to the episode, the Patreon episode, trying to find a clip that we can post for this little snippet that we always post on the free feed.
I'm sitting here right now with Alex and Ed, and we are trying to find a clip that is appropriate enough to put on this feed, and we cannot find a clip.
Okay?
That's all I have to say.
We cannot find a we went off the rails.
Something happened.
I'm not sure what it was.
I think it was the turkey chili I had.
The ending of it is kind of wholesome.
We went through the things we're thankful for.
I'm going to include that clip, but literally nothing else is appropriate enough to include.
We were going crazy.
So happy Thanksgiving.
And for all you guys on Patreon, you'll know exactly what the fuck I'm talking about.
Peace.
In all seriousness, we have to.
I think we have to do something uplifting for the end of the episode.
Okay?
We have to.
We have to.
This is Thanksgiving.
This is celebration of food.
It's the celebration of family.
It's a celebration of friends, right?
It's a celebration.
So we need to celebrate friends.
Do we have friends here?
Yep.
Okay.
Do we have family here?
Absolutely.
This is family.
This is family.
Do you know?
We, we, what?
We need, we need to, we need to be together.
We need to bring everybody together.
Everybody listening right now.
Everybody listening right now.
Everybody has to come together.
Okay?
What, dude?
I'm trying to have a moment.
Bring it together.
Holy shear.
Benson.
You didn't know what you walked into.
Benson, you're in the spin cycle now.
Okay?
So we were talking about what we're thankful for.
I think that's a great way to end the episode.
Okay?
Benson, what are you thankful for?
Why don't you just stand right in front of the fucking camera?
Why don't you do that?
Holy shit.
Holy shit.
Was that you playing steal a bacon with me when we were a little younger?
No.
I think I'm thinking I'm thankful for everybody and everyone in my life and everything that's led me to this point in my life.
That's some gas shit to say.
Fuck you, bro.
Fuck out of here with that.
Grateful for That Hog00:03:43
That's some Christians.
They got to you, yo.
Them Christians got to you, bro.
Oh, shit.
Wow, spicy, dog.
Spicy.
Man is spicy.
Yo.
Yo.
Benson got tight.
He really did, bro.
He was like Matt Volunteer, son.
I know.
Yo, he'd be a man vulnerable.
Yeah, you thought that we were like a sincere, thoughtful podcast, and then you came with that boring ass Hallmark card.
You know, we want some real shit.
What are you grateful for?
Thankful for the flagrancy.
Yeah, that's a better answer.
That's a solid answer.
That's a solid answer.
All right, Alex, what are you thankful for besides melanin deficient people?
I'm thankful for vegans.
Vegans, okay?
Eden, what are you thankful for?
All the food I get to consume because I'm fat as fuck.
You're not that fat, dude.
I know, but it's more fun that way.
No.
He's not that fat.
It's not fat.
All the pussy you get to eat for Thanksgiving.
Oh, shit.
There you go.
I'm thankful for all the edding I get to eat Thanksgiving.
I am very thankful for friends, family, and all the people that got me here today.
No.
I am very thankful for, in all seriousness, I am very thankful for my dad's fucking hog, man.
My dad has a big dick, dude, and it's wild.
I've seen it.
You've seen it, right?
I've seen it.
You've seen it on soft, right?
Bruh.
And still, right?
Bruh.
Son.
Son.
On soft?
On soft, even when it's scrunched up?
Because sometimes it can get scrunched.
Son.
Impressivo, is it not?
Yo.
Son, my man left him impression.
Son, he did for real.
Son, I would honestly, like, when my dad would walk to the bathroom and I'd see his dick, I'd be like, I'd be like, oh, dad, stop.
But I'd be like, looking at it still.
I'd be like, dad, put something on.
But I'd be like, is that your dick, bro?
Like, when my dick grow into that dick, you know, still waiting.
So, so, but I'm thankful for that hog because that hog took up so much space in my mom, not a single sperm could fall out and leak out the sides.
So it, it really, all the sperm went going for the egg.
And the fastest one that got there when there was no sperm leaked out was me.
So I'm, I'm grateful for that hog, you know, and I'm grateful for that fucking hog, man.
That can on canon, canon, canon.
Real talk.
So, dad, I'm grateful for that.
That fucking hog.
That's it.
Yo, thank you guys for listening.
Yo, what's up?
This is Akash.
That was a preview of our Patreon episode.
If you want the full thing, go to www.patreon.com/slash flagrantrue.
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