Fear& hosts in Los Angeles debate autism diagnoses and MS symptoms before betting $10,000 on beating Elden Ring's "Melania" boss. They analyze Ludwig's TikTok fame, mishap with ill-fitting secret Santa gifts, and travel anxieties regarding Japan flights versus domestic safety. The discussion covers Mormon ward hierarchies, the political controversy surrounding Wicked, and a shocking Streamer Awards incident involving urinals, ultimately highlighting the chaotic blend of personal health struggles, cultural critiques, and gaming culture that defines their community interactions. [Automatically generated summary]
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Diagnosing Autism Scores00:04:08
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another incredible edition of Fear End and the rare occasion now that we have each and every member of our hosting crew.
We're all here together reading this family just for you to enjoy.
How are we feeling, guys?
You know what?
It's a beautiful Saturday morning.
The sun is out in sunny Los Angeles.
I've got a delicious mint mocha.
My bones have been achy for like a week.
I think I have MS. Are you on Prilosec?
No.
No, okay.
Because I just got off Prilosec and I've been sleeping so good.
I realize now that the show functions better with only one of you.
Because when you guys get together, it turns into crazy nervousness.
USA.
You know what's so funny?
I actually thought I had MS last night too.
I googled it.
Yeah.
I'm not even kidding.
Like I'm not even mine too.
My hand, my arm feels weak.
But it could be dehydration.
Oh.
Yeah.
No, as we get older, because we're...
Sometimes your bones just ache.
What do you mean?
For a week?
Yeah.
Yeah.
It just happens.
Yeah.
We might have MS. I should show some empathy.
I think a lot.
You guys just fail to comprehend.
I think that the human body is a self-fixing machine.
Yeah.
And sometimes he's yelling at us.
I do think that's it.
And it's sometimes better to just avoid.
I'm not mansplaining.
I'll be honest.
I got done with my first boxing training and my body feels like a bag of broken glass because there's so much.
I had been prepping for boxing because there's a lot of neck training.
There's too much neck training.
My neck, my head feels like an orange on a crazy straw right now.
That's so good though, because then you won't have any neck pain.
I'm going to be, my neck is going to be so thick.
Yeah.
It's so hot.
I got a neck injury the other day from weightlifting where I like, when I first push off on the incline bench press, like, I pushed into my, I pushed into my neck while I was pushing it off and it was like fairly heavy.
So it just went like a little vertebrae, like a little vertebrae crunch.
It's fine.
It's not the end of the world.
And I'm perfectly fine.
You take it Avil.
No MS. No MS. Yeah, no MS. You might have MS. No.
So what ends up happening in this situation is like you have to, you have to strengthen like other muscles around your neck to make sure that like your neck is more stable and it doesn't get into a situation like that.
Guys, that's what you're supposed to do.
There's a big story this week.
What's that?
We all found out as a global community that Hassan has autism.
Oh, yeah, that's right.
So it's not a joke anymore.
No, no, no.
Like, you know, what's funny is I took the test afterward, nailed it.
Definitely don't have autism.
But it was funny because I was.
One would say I nailed it.
Well, I was going through the test and so many of them, I was like, this sounds like Hassan.
Yeah.
Like, like, like, cannot stop talking about something I'm interested in.
Frequently am confused when have to change topic.
Like, these are Hassan to a T. Or just like, was there like blatantly ignore people around you?
Yes.
Was that one of the ones?
Did you write the test?
Why do you know that?
I don't know.
I genuinely.
No, he's just listing.
I don't like that.
I just, I mean, wait, is that, was that really on the test?
Oh, yes.
Oh my God.
That's I got a fucking high score, Austin.
Wait, that's awesome.
And the results are like probably don't have autism.
Like low autism.
You know what?
Possibility of autism.
Definitely have autism.
Like medium score for people that definitely have autism.
And then like, we don't know what this number means.
You're authentic.
Is that what he got?
Because I was right below the like breaking the meter.
Oh my God.
I was right below the, I got 127 on my test.
Just for reference.
And 130 is like.
127 means that like if you got 130, you're like, you definitely have like pretty substantial autism.
Traveling With Low Scores00:09:24
Yeah.
But I was right underneath it, which means maybe I don't have it.
I think the first comment was somebody that's like, hey, I scored 122 and I'm full diagnosed.
Yeah.
Stranger things have happened.
My opinion on this is I have lived 33 wonderful years on this earth without having an autism diagnosis.
Yeah, because you're hot.
And this happens all the time.
Especially with women.
Yep.
Right?
Like, they're like, oh, she's not.
She doesn't have autism.
She doesn't have like a social ineptitude.
She's just kitschy.
She's just cool.
That is true.
You're actually talking about how hard it is to diagnose women.
I'm going to lose a finger.
It's a stock.
I slept with it this way.
Is it going to get that thing where it dies off and then it goes near your blood and you're holding that?
It's a ring.
I know.
Austin can't get it over.
Okay, wait.
What are you guys doing?
Just leave it.
You'll do it afterwards.
He's right.
You got to lubricate it.
Yeah.
Don't worry.
You have to either ice it.
Like, first thing.
Do this.
Yeah.
Austin touched it.
Sorry.
I cleaned my hands.
First things first.
Oh, yo, get that.
Lubricate.
Get that.
It's annoying me.
Get that black thing off her shoulder.
Sorry.
I just, that was just.
Was that on the test?
No, no, that's not autistic.
You do have to take the test now.
Oh, we will.
Because I think, I'm starting to think I'm the only one in this room that doesn't like trains.
No, see, I don't like trains.
I like planes.
Very different.
Very different.
Okay.
Objectively, a worse method of travel, even though obviously, you know, it is phenomenal that it exists.
It's objectively a better way of travel.
No, I would say it's a worse method of travel because like trains are way more cozy.
Like they're just cozier.
Like when you get on a train, it's like you feel.
No, you don't.
You feel like a security blanket.
For me, it's turbulence 100% of the time.
What?
On a plane.
Air travel is much smoother.
Are you insane?
You cannot be serious right now.
The turbulence on a train is nothing.
It's just comforting.
How do you run out of track?
It's repetitive sounds and noises that give you comfort.
On a plane, turbulence means you're going down.
No, you're not.
Turbulence is incredibly safe.
Wait for me, cutie.
Speaking of planes, trains, and automobiles, cutie the hunter.
I hated it.
I hated it so much.
But you went to a show in another place.
Yeah.
It was nice because we got to talk about it.
I went to Vancouver.
I know.
I never text.
I'm sorry.
I'm a bad friend.
I was like, oh my God, I could be helpful.
So I went to Vancouver.
I brought you guys presents, but I forgot them.
But I got you surprise syrup.
Oh.
Surprise syrup.
Surprise syrup.
Like it's a different kind of syrup.
Like we just don't know what it's made out of.
No, it's like Canada syrup.
I thought that that's definitely a nickname for combine.
Yeah.
Ew.
What's up, guys?
I got some surprise syrup.
Can I try this?
This is the eggnog one, right?
No.
Oh my God.
Wait, which one's the eggnog?
ADHD.
It's so crazy.
It is hot one.
Oh, yeah.
This is the hot nog.
I love eggnog.
So cutie goes to Vancouver.
I went to Vancouver.
So it was too much.
So she flew on a plane.
The plane or Taylor Swift?
The plane.
I hate it.
Okay.
Cutie, tell us, take us through your experience.
Okay, so what happened was somebody's being suffocated on the no, it's just my doorhead to unlock and I'm so sorry.
Let's continue.
What happened was I woke up that morning and I kept saying, I kept saying I didn't like, I was like, guys, I don't need to go.
Yeah.
Because I didn't need to go.
I could have just watched it at home.
I'm going to be honest with you.
You did need to go.
Yeah, you did.
You 100% needed to go.
Not because like you had to get on a plane.
That's cool.
That's wonderful.
And not because like, oh, this is Taylor's last, you know, this is Taylor's last bout, right?
You had to go because it was the post-streamer awards episode.
And that's usually a banger because there's drams.
Well, we can cover that today.
And that is, we will.
But now the algorithm milk that.
Yeah.
The algorithm has done what it was supposed to do and you were not there.
So I was like, if this bitch doesn't fucking fly to Taylor Swift and she just bails on the podcast, I'm going to kill her.
Oh, they went full misogyny.
They're like, she doesn't deserve the right.
They don't.
If they don't.
They.
They.
No, I was on your side the whole time.
If it makes you feel any better, the streamer awards did not pull on YouTube this year.
So it would have been, it wouldn't have done anything for them.
Do we feel good about that?
Why would we feel good about it?
Well, because it wouldn't have helped.
Well, I guess if this is a streamer words episode.
Well, we'll see what happens.
No, we put it in the title last week and it definitely helped.
We said it would stream awards earlier and then we didn't.
You did message us something.
I said on the plane.
What?
That when you were on drugs, you felt fine.
I said that?
Yeah, you said you were relaxed.
As soon as those drugs kicked in, you were like, you don't remember because you were on drugs.
I was on so much drugs.
Yeah, but you were like, and then I tried to go to Taylor Swift right after.
I was so tired.
I would have rather watched it at home.
You flew the same day as the concert?
Yeah.
Girl, what are you doing?
Well, I had streamer words the day before and it was the last concert.
Oh my God, you had to go on a bender to fly.
I know.
And then I tried to go to the show and I'm like, oh, my God.
Did your nerves calm at any point during the flight?
Yeah, she literally.
Yeah, when I was on the drugs.
The drugs.
Yeah, okay.
We just got to put you on the drugs earlier.
Put you on the drugs earlier.
Yeah.
Yeah, maybe.
Like for weeks in advance.
Okay, question for you.
I had a conversation with Maya after you guys came back.
And she believes that she has to be there for you to be able to travel.
Is this correct?
Yeah, so my OCD latches onto certain people just randomly.
And it takes a while.
But maybe it'll latch onto one of you guys.
I mean, I was thinking maybe it could be me.
I'm scared though, because I think you're a panicky bitch.
Excuse me.
Of all of us.
Excuse me.
It should be me.
No, no, hold on.
Yeah, I think you'd be the last.
With respect to all of you, with respect when it comes to flying, she needs to cling on to me.
Yeah, but Austin, don't you.
I'm the only one that can get us out alive.
Don't you think we have...
He is still fantasizing about landing a plane.
This is your most male, like hyper-masculine male trip.
She's going to cling to me.
And when danger strikes, she's going to look to me and I'm going to have answers.
You guys aren't going to know what to do.
Don't you think?
Don't you think that maybe it's bad juju and the plane will crash if we're both on the same plane?
Yeah.
Because we're both afraid?
Every day.
Yeah, but we're both on.
I'm not afraid.
One time I had to be on a plane with Hassan and I was so mad because I felt like that if anyone's plane was going to get shot down in the Hassan's.
Shot down.
Yeah.
It was right after that one plane.
Assassinated.
They're going to shoot a slane now.
It was right after what?
We were coming back from Texas.
It was right after that one plane got shot down in like Russia and they were like, oopsie.
Oh, yeah.
I remember that one.
That was a fear of mine.
That was crazy.
Do you think these things happen even commonly in Russia?
I think you got ops and I think those drones over New Jersey are weird.
Do you guys know that I stream super late night and I'm still absolutely bright-eyed and bushytailed for the podcast.
How do you do it, Will?
I'm gonna tell you how I do it.
Beam.
Have you ever heard of Beam, Cutie Cinderella?
Yeah, I've used it before when I was really anxious to go to Disneyland the next day.
And then my brother-in-law gave me some and he said, You got to drink this.
And then I did and I went to sleep.
Oh, well, tell us about it.
What is it?
It's a, well, I wouldn't say that it's like sleep support.
And they have like hot cocoa flavored.
Yeah, this one.
Ooh, yeah, this is a cinnamon cocoa flavored.
This one's the sea salt.
And it has a mix of like magnesium, melatonin, l-theanine.
I have a problem when I take melatonin alone, I get shaky, but the l-theanine stops that.
That's right.
It's so interesting because I was just enjoying a nice cup of hot cocoa before bed.
How convenient Beam has got it all in one powder with so many things that are helped me with my sleep.
Well, and there's no grogginess.
That's what's really nice about it: it feels really very, very natural.
That's right.
And if you want to try Beam's best-selling dream powder, get up to 40% off for a limited time when you go to shopbeam.com/slash fear and use the code fear at checkout.
That's shopbeam.com/slash fear and use the code fear for up to 40% off.
And have a good night's sleep.
Sleep well.
Oh, yeah.
I've been receiving those drones over New Jersey.
Most of those are just planes that people think.
I don't think so.
I've gone into Hassan's chat like 20 times and just asked if he's covered the drones every time he has.
Yeah, it's the only time Cutie's ever in my chat is to ask me about the drone.
Ask about the fucking.
Okay, so I actually love when you are on the plane.
I love when you call to me to give you plane advice.
Uh-uh.
I feel like it's so special.
You know, it's really funny.
Our advice is very different.
Yeah.
I'm, you do like a very analytical analysis of what's going on, and I do positive gas.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Gaslighting.
Well, because you'd be like, what's the CLI?
And I'd be like, shut up, bitch.
Like, it's no, I forgot about that.
It's fine.
It's the air conditioning, you dummy.
Oh, yeah.
And you'd be like, well, actually.
Yeah, no.
I was in the chat and I was like, that is completely incorrect.
But yeah, Will would tell you something to make you feel better.
And I just didn't like that.
You were bad my flight back.
Gamer From Grindr00:13:24
Oh, I know.
I was so upset because I missed her text.
She's like, doesn't the plane need to be de-iced?
Doesn't the plane need to be de-iced?
And I missed the text.
Meanwhile, I'm on the plane being like, excuse me, have you de-iced the plane?
Yeah, no, and I realized, I was like, Cutie, the temperature is above freezing in Seattle right now.
You don't have to de-ice the plane.
There's nothing.
But maybe there was ice in the sky when it came up.
I mean, yeah, but that, but, but you, did you read my text?
I don't think you read it.
I don't.
I said that by the time the plane is in the sky, it has its own mechanisms of de-icing.
Yeah.
Oh.
Yeah.
Called anti-ice.
I don't think it works the same way on the ground.
That's right.
Anyway, congratulations.
We're so proud of you.
I did it.
I was cutie Cinderella with that.
You put a pin in one of the longest running gags in our history.
But it's not over yet because there's something else.
Uh-oh.
Oh, with great leaps and bounds that people take.
With tremendous courage demonstrated.
There are rewards that must be dished out.
That was beautifully written.
There was a banter.
There was a barter.
There was a gamble that had taken place.
I don't know what the hell is going on.
You, my friend, Willard Ebers, Savage Netf III.
Yes.
10,000 bones.
American dollars.
10,000 American dollars that you could have.
You had tremendous opportunity.
You could have actually gotten those 10,000 bones from Will.
I didn't know you could have gotten that.
I don't think anybody would have paid me.
I doubted that.
I think Will absolutely would have paid me.
I doubted the bet.
He looks like a bet pay.
He would have paid me.
But you know what?
A lot of people are, I'd like to address the folks out there that are like going, na, na, na, na, boo, boo.
I am so proud of you, Cutie, for getting on the plane.
And fuck all you motherfuckers that are like, oh, I just have to pay the bet.
Bitch, I'm going to show up.
10 grand as Will.
No harm, no fight.
Congratulations.
I'm also giving you an out.
What's the out?
If you beat Elden Ring on stream, you can keep it.
That's so funny.
That's so funny.
There ain't no way.
He doesn't believe.
Bet him $10,000 that you could do it.
Yeah, then you'll get it.
If you don't beat Elden Ring on stream, you give me $10,000.
We've already done.
I don't give you anything if I lose.
That's not how this works.
Yeah, you guys both build on the gaming.
Yeah, we're just gonna be.
He owes me $1,000.
We all agreed to that.
Why does no one owe me money?
You don't make that business bets.
It makes life so much more.
Hold the payment.
Hold the payment.
Put it in escrow.
I will be able to do that.
We put money in the raw.
No, you gotta beat the game.
No, you have to beat it.
No, no, no.
Hold on.
Hold on.
At Netflix, you were like, you're gonna set me up to beat a boss.
Okay.
You have to beat the whole game on any timeline or you have one day to beat Melania.
Who's Melania?
She's tough.
Ask MP.
No, It's better for you to beat the whole game than this.
Wait, isn't, but isn't part of the whole game to beat?
She's an extra game.
No, she's an extra boss.
And also, you can't get to her until you finish like 75% of the game.
And you can't speedrun to Melania and then try to.
I'll be honest, if I stream this, I would make $10,000 before I get to the game.
That's what I'm saying.
It would be one of your most viewed events.
Austin Show.
Austin Show has to beat Elden Ring.
Well, because when you are in week 17, the hype would really grow.
Yeah.
There would be a lot of...
It would be tumultuous.
There would be a lot of twists and turns.
Any timeline.
You don't want to dodge it.
What's frustrating is I just wouldn't enjoy it at all.
That's why it's awesome.
Okay.
All right.
Well, you know what, Marsh, maybe just pay like $10,000 for my game.
That is so funny.
I'll give it a try.
Okay.
I'll give it a try.
But the moment I start, I'm going to know whether I want to do it or not.
So put it in escrow for now.
No, no, it's cool.
Elden Ring.
Some software games famously hold your hand and show you the ropes.
Yeah.
We'll do this.
Or Melania.
Yeah.
Or we'll create a big live stream event.
No.
Austin.
No.
Let him learn.
No.
What?
Trust me.
He's a gamer.
Finishing the game is.
Anyway, now you're going.
Wait, did you see that Ludwig won Gamer of the Year from Grinder?
Oh, my God.
It's not even Gamer of the Year.
From Grinder.
Isn't that weird?
This is the first thing for the record.
Hassan, I defend your honor.
My lovely boyfriend wakes me up and he's like, babe, I won Gamer of the Year.
And I go, no, you didn't.
Streamer Awards hasn't happened.
What are you talking about?
He's like, no, gamer from Grindr.
And I said, Hassan didn't win?
Gamer.
Because you're all the gays.
The gays rage.
Or he doesn't play video.
Here's the deal.
Yeah.
It doesn't even matter.
Yeah.
Wow.
Grinder voted for a gamer of the year.
You weren't even top five, Hassan.
I wasn't even on the list.
But we don't game Hassan.
He kind of does.
I do game sometimes.
People don't think everybody that knows you from the gay community, none of them game either, I don't think.
Yeah.
I don't know who the other content creators are either.
Up until Dawn, Haslands, Farrer Riz, then Devo Glare.
It is rather interesting, though, that the gay community voted for Ludwig.
I don't know how they found him.
Well, I don't know if you know this, cutie, but in the in-gay.
You guys think he's on Grinder?
Like, to be honest with me.
No, he's on the gays use the internet.
Yeah.
I didn't know they had that.
So I don't know if you know this, but Ludwig is actually, like Hassan, has a very cult gay following in gay spaces on the internet.
TikTok.
So whenever I post a shirtless video of Ludwig on my TikTok.
You don't do that.
I do.
When have you done that?
Multiple times because he, him and I were in the tub together.
Oh, right, right, right.
Okay.
So anytime I post a shirtless video of Ludwig, the gays in the comment section go absolutely feral.
Wow.
They do.
I feel like his appeal is very different than mine.
Yeah.
He's like a...
Speak on that, King.
He's like a like a twink that got older.
Like he has.
I think he's attractive.
No, I think Ludwig is very attractive.
Okay.
I think Ludwig is a very attractive man.
I'm about to be aware of that.
But I also think that he has like, he's like not as gruff as you are, but also.
Oh, okay.
But also not as twinkish, but he has a lot of twinkish qualities, I think.
I don't know how I would categorize Ludwig.
He's like a jock.
We've come full circle.
I'm telling y'all.
What would you categorize me then?
Bitter old man.
Just kidding.
Yeah, I'm the bitter old man.
In this conversation, I'm the bitter old man.
You're not a bear.
You're too lean to be a bear.
I would say you're probably like a, you're just daddy, probably.
You're like a daddy.
Yeah.
Or like a hunk.
Daddy.
Sure.
Okay.
Stop.
Sorry.
Sorry.
Stop it.
Sorry.
Okay.
You need to get a squirt bottle.
What is Will then?
Will.
Nothing.
No, you're not.
Come on.
No, Will is also.
I think Will would be a hunk.
Hunk, yeah.
Yeah.
I don't know what I'm saying.
Like a muscle daddy.
Well, no, I guess like close to a muscle daddy, but I feel like in order to be a muscle daddy in the gay community, you have to be like literally competition ready.
Yeah.
You have to be, you have to be Mr. Olympia style.
Hey, can I admit something?
You know the underwear thing?
You guys never explained it to me.
Yeah.
You just said buy underwear.
Yeah.
So I just bought underwear.
Who'd you buy it for?
You.
You.
That's exactly what they it's exactly what you were supposed to do.
Okay.
Do you do this?
There's lore.
Okay.
So we'll share it with the normal episode, the brokeies.
Yeah, subscribe, broke bitches.
Whoa.
But wait, you know, I feel bad.
Can we cut that out?
No.
No, no, we're keeping that in.
For the record, I don't think you're broke.
He thinks you're poor.
No, I don't think you're poor or broke.
I think you are.
But you do think there's something wrong with being broken.
No, no, no.
I don't think there's anything.
No, it's good that you specify.
I do think that it would be in your best interest to subscribe to the Patreon.
However, I respect you and your finances.
So in eighth grade, we had a brawn underwear party that the cool girl threw and I got invited.
What's brawn?
Huh?
What's brawn?
Bra and underwear.
They had a soap.
Oh, I thought you said brawn.
I know.
People say I say family reunion weird too.
Yeah, your mouth kind of went totally cat.
Emburger.
Yeah, you're not embroiling.
Brawn underwear.
Okay.
I see what's happening.
Okay.
It's like your mouth was hit with a peanut butter.
No, like a poisonous dark frog.
And it's just like, it's an MS. No, Okay.
That's a stroke, but you're not having one.
You're not having one.
You're not having a stroke.
Unless you smell almonds right now.
Yeah.
But it might be my lattice.
I think you just like give up on saying things correctly halfway through.
Yeah.
Like your mouth gets disinterested.
Bra and underwear.
Okay.
There's a brawn underwear party.
And the cool girl invited us.
And everyone drew a name, like a secret Santa of who you had to bring brawn underwear for.
And I drew a girl, but I was poor.
And so I got her brawn underwear at Walmart.
And then I cut the tags off so people didn't know that I got Walmart.
And maybe they would think it was Victoria's Secret.
Right.
And everybody else got Braun underwear at Victoria's Secret.
And then when it comes time to change, they noticed that mine wasn't Victoria's Secret.
So I felt bad.
So I kept the, I kept mine and let her like, I gave her my nice one because I had never had Victoria's Secret.
That's so sad.
Oh.
Yeah, but...
Wait, who drew your name?
Austin.
Did you get her Victoria's Secret?
Oh, no.
Austin!
Oh, my God, bro.
That's why it was...
You do not understand women.
This was all a setup.
It was all a setup so that she can feel not like the buzz at all.
No, what's really funny about this is I went to Target.
No!
It's worse than Walmart.
I can't believe you've done this.
What?
I mean, I don't know.
Did you even listen to the story?
No, I just thought we were doing it abroad under eyes because she couldn't afford Victoria's Secret.
Yeah, but we need to do our dashing Victoria's Secret.
No, I tried to do that.
They didn't have it on the screen.
You know what's funny is that we've had this for weeks.
And then last night in the group chat, I knew this was going to be a topic of discussion because Austin goes, oh, crap, I forgot.
No, I brought it up knowing that he had not remembered.
Marsh, is there anywhere we can order Victoria's Secretary?
I'm sorry.
I'm not frolicking around the mall shopping for women's underwear and bras.
You did.
You did have an assignment.
I did, but you forgot about me.
It was a month.
I did not forget about you.
I brought until I brought it.
You just cut the tags off, Cheapo!
No, they're actually on the underwear.
It's okay.
No, I'm happy.
I had to remind you last night.
They're a lovely pair of bras.
I wish anyone else would have drawn me.
I think you're going to wear them.
I think you're going to wear them.
That's awesome.
I think you're going to wear them and they're going to look great.
Okay.
Well, we've all drawn each other.
They have a double, what do you call it?
They work.
They have two titties.
No, no.
I can reverse it.
No, no.
They have like a double.
The only underwear that is readily available on Postmates is unfortunately the shit underwear that he bought from Target.
It's okay.
It's okay.
Also, bras are expensive.
Yeah, they're expensive.
That's what I said.
It's like $40.
I'd like to buy these shoes for my mama, please.
Okay, so who's going first?
Ladies and gentlemen.
These two are hypochondriacs.
Oh, big time.
Big time.
You need to go see the doctor.
Always.
Which is why they both utilize ZocDoc.
Yeah.
Because Zock Doc is a free app and website where you can search and compare high quality in-network doctors.
Choose the right one for your needs, whether it be real problems or made up ones in your head like these two, and instantly book an appointment.
I like that it's instant because you never know when you decided you're dying.
That's right.
It could strike at any moment.
Yeah.
And you don't want to go to a doctor and find out you're at a network.
That's right.
Thankfully, with ZocDoc, that doesn't have to happen.
No, we're talking about in-network appointments with more than 100,000 healthcare providers across every specialty.
And you can book within 24 to 72 hours.
Wow.
That's right.
Plus, Zock Doc appointments happen very fast.
We're not just talking about same week.
We're talking about 24 hours and you can even get same-day appointments.
So stop putting off those doctors' appointments or start getting hypochondriac about it like these two and go.
Or maybe even just use it as a dating website.
Yeah.
I don't know if that's a feature, but ladies and gentlemen, that's z-oc-d-oc-c.com slash fear to find and book top-rated doctors today.
That's right.
I have something for March.
Yeah.
I drew March's name and I think I think this might be the best underwear possible.
Uber Pajama Adventures00:15:10
You told me you were a size large.
Oh, and this is a special edition and it's not available anywhere that you could ever purchase.
No, I'm serious.
Target.
No, I had to acquire this after doing a bunch of work specifically.
What?
You send the system out.
Oh, that's special edition aiming the yard.
Okay, okay, wait a minute.
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
They punched up his eyebrows.
They did.
Why did they punch up his eyebrows?
I don't know.
I think so there's more contrast.
But I didn't even think about that.
That right there, my friend, is for you.
And it's a large, because your size large, as you said.
Okay.
That's very good.
Yeah, that's very good, Hassan.
We're very proud of you.
That's very good.
I got you a menagerie of things that I enjoy.
Oh, what the fuck?
So I didn't really know what to get.
Okay.
But I wanted to be a theme.
So I kind of made you like a team rocket trainer.
He'd be the best like uncle to have for just start pulling Christmas out.
Uncle Will.
So that's.
Pokemon Center Pikachu Eevee red and black plaid.
That's a scarf.
What the heck?
Oh my God.
This is the rich girls.
Yeah.
Like gifting one another.
Tags off, slut.
Yeah, you got stuck with the broken.
I mean, it was an expensive delivery fee.
You ain't got a target.
You got it from Uber.
He did his best.
Jesus.
Okay.
Wait, Will went over the top.
He got pajamas?
Wait, this is like a set of pajamas.
Wait, we should get everyone Christmas pajamas.
Wait, wait, next week because it's before Christmas.
Oh, these are so bloody.
Wait, those are so slow.
They have pockets.
Wait, yo.
Oh, my God.
Hold on.
Hold on, Will.
Those are sexy.
They are.
These always feel so distinct.
It's an iron.
Wait, can you see me those?
It'll fit.
Wait.
I could get some extra smalls for a friend.
Yeah.
For a friend.
What are you doing?
I just think there's...
And then I got you the Pikachu and Eevee winter hat.
Pikachu, Eevee best friendship winter hat.
Look at that.
Oh my God, that's cute.
Oh, that's so cute.
Oh, look at him.
He's fitting.
And then those are little gloves and socks.
Pikachu and Eevee gloves and Pikachu and Eevee socks plaid.
Can you try putting those gloves on for my entertainment?
Oh my God.
And then there's actual underpants as well.
He really outdid himself.
He did outdid himself.
You got hot pink.
Oh my God.
Pair of Thieves underwear.
What?
Why are you.
I love those underwear, but I'll get it.
Okay.
Hell yeah.
Thank you, Will.
You're welcome.
I hate to bring up a plane story.
No, you don't.
But that guy, the pair of thieves.
You like Pair of Thieves?
Yeah.
I met the founder of Pair of Thieves on a plane.
I sat next to him.
He sent me a box.
Yeah, they make a quality product.
And now that I remember, that was like four months ago.
He sent it to my, and I haven't picked it up yet.
So anyway, maybe we should get him to sponsor the podcast.
Oh.
Anyway.
Yeah.
Do you have his number?
I do.
Okay.
Wait, you look really cute.
Yeah, you look so cute and cozy.
I am.
You're probably.
This is the first time I've ever complimented him.
It's so cute.
Yeah, I want to see that.
I want to see what happens.
Have you ever been in jersey?
These shoes.
You look really good.
Will you do a really good job?
Thank you.
I think you did a better job.
I think this is going to be hilarious because then cutie's going to have a banger.
And then, you know, let's see what cutie got.
I think you're going to love your undies and your bra.
Okay, we'll see.
Maybe.
He did not kill his wife.
They're stretchy.
Maybe.
Sir, I want to buy these shoes.
Yeah.
It fits.
My mom loved that song.
Do you think it's why she died?
Oh, my God.
Yeah.
Sometimes there's signs in life.
That's true.
Cutie.
What the fuck?
It's true.
She loved it.
Manami Cheese.
I think that's why she died.
You look very cute.
I'm very cozy.
You look amazing.
Thank you.
Okay.
Is it my turn?
Okay.
Get my sweet green bag.
Sweet greens.
Oh, my God.
No.
Oh, my God.
Creepy Yoda.
I did not know you loved me like this.
Wait, who's this for?
Oh, what do you mean?
What do you mean?
Wait, hold on.
Marsh has you.
Oh, Marsh has me.
Okay, I'm sorry.
Is it all Yoda theme?
Yes.
Well, you guys did beyond underwear.
She's a rich girl now.
Wait.
Is that actually Pervy Yoda?
Did you have these printed?
Yeah.
That's insane.
You went crazy.
These are screenshots from the stream.
Oh, my God.
Oh, you went crazy, Mo.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
He's going to sexually harass so hard.
Oh, my God.
This is incredible.
Yay, yippy.
This is incredible.
All right, Marsh, what do you get?
I got...
He got.
Marsh got.
Very limited.
Highly coveted.
No!
You got me.
Family Mark.
Oh, my God.
Where's my underwear?
Sorry, Annie.
No, it's okay.
I'm okay with it.
I just won't wear any.
Wait, so literally everyone got banger, either like special edition or like well-thought-out gifts for one another.
I assume we're going to close it out with a banger.
Austin, what did you get, Cutie Cinderella?
The person.
The city land sticker.
The person who was this.
I just want to reiterate to the folks at home, the reason why we're doing this is because Cutie Cinderella had a traumatic experience where she was unable to laugh like he was about to pick up his dog shit.
Oh my god, I'm so sorry.
Look.
This is healing my inner child.
This is the funniest thing you've ever done, Austin.
Okay, so.
This is the funniest thing.
I'll be honest with you.
I didn't think everybody was taking it so seriously.
That was cool.
You guys put a lot of thought into your gifts.
I don't get presents very often.
I'm just not really a gifter myself.
Look.
So I really want to buy these.
Okay.
Here, I got you a bra.
Okay.
And panties.
I'm going to piss my arms.
It's so ugly.
What is that?
It's a, um, it's a wire-free bra.
All-day comfort and smooth underclothes.
It's got adjustable styles.
I can't.
I'm going to piss them.
It's so ugly.
Oh, my God.
It's so ugly.
It's so pretty.
Look at this.
Don't put that near me.
He got her granny panties.
Oh, my God.
My abs are.
No, no, no.
Okay, I got you those.
You didn't show your bags.
You did.
Everyone got everyone's sizes.
Wait, you did?
You surely got it?
Yes.
Oh, my God.
Remember when I was reiterating like Marsh wanted a large doesn't even fit.
Oh, okay, okay, okay.
It's a 36 C.
Okay, we can make it work.
It's adjustable.
It's not, the cup size isn't adjustable.
Everyone knows I'm not a C. What's a C?
Are those big?
Yes.
I think you have big boobs.
I think you have big seeds.
No one said that.
No, cutie, you have big boobs.
With a lot of power of positive energy.
Your tits will fill that out.
You have beautiful boobs.
And I wanted you.
You know what?
It's something you can grow into.
Okay.
This is so much better than if he had forgotten.
Okay.
All right.
Here we go.
If he had forgotten and didn't bring anything, this would have been worse.
No, it's not.
No, no, no.
Let's see the price tag.
Okay, hold on.
It's also the wrong size.
Can I show the under?
You body shaved me in both ways.
Oh, wait.
This one's too big.
So you said you got small ass bitties.
This one is too small.
Saying, I've got a fat ass.
No, no, I don't even.
I'm clinging to life.
Thank you.
At least that doesn't look like something a grandmother would wear.
Sexy.
Thank you.
I can't wear to wear these together.
Good job.
They don't fit.
I don't even think that would get over my thigh.
Look.
Oh my God.
It could have been a lot worse.
No.
No, I think this is the worst.
No.
I think if you had forgotten, it would have not been.
Oh, my God.
It wouldn't have been as funny.
This is the Japan sticker all over again.
No, it's 10 times worse.
Wait, really?
She told you about her childhood trauma.
Are people going to be mad?
It has a hook that crisscrosses.
No, people are not going to be mad.
It's hilarious.
But listen, we're going to make it right, Austin.
You were afraid to go on a women's underpants.
I was.
Because of the gay.
Yes.
And I think you and I should go and we can make this right together.
Yes, we'll do that.
I'm sure you're going to be able to do it.
We can't go to trashy laundry.
It's a little bit more.
We're going to go to trashy laundry.
Okay, I'm going to get you.
So it's very pretty.
I didn't know.
I'll be honest.
I thought, okay, so when I go shopping for underwear, yes, we're going to stream it.
I buy my underwear from Target sometimes.
That's right, but this is a gift-giving exercise.
But the pair of thieves are from Target.
That's true, but that's why I got them all.
That's why he got me all this other stuff.
Okay, so I'll be honest, I'm not a very good gift gear.
I need to work.
I'm not sad.
Okay, I'm so sorry.
I'll find someone that's a 36C that can wear this.
No, what about you can wear these?
I cannot.
Austin, my ass will quite literally.
I don't think that's how that works.
You can't just like...
That's sexy.
Austin, I'm a size large.
No, you're not.
And undies.
You know what?
In the Patreon, we're going to try everything on.
Look, Austin has to come out and adjust the socks.
Look, I will tell you, it was very, it was a lot of work.
I had to work with the Uber drive.
Okay, can I tell you guys a secret?
Yes.
So funny thing is, when you're ordering, when you're ordering panties and a bra.
So I will come clean.
I forgot completely.
Yeah.
And we know you said it in the...
I was out at the gay bars last night when I got the text and I was like, shit, what am I going to do?
I knew you had forgotten.
I went to shop next door because there was a gay shop and I was like, oh, I can't get cutie a jockstrap.
That'd be funny.
That would have been funny.
Fuck.
Okay, I should have done that.
So I was like, okay, Uber Eats is my last thing.
So I was like, in the morning, I'll get on and order from Uber Eats.
And I'm like, oh, I could definitely order really nice underwear from Uber Eats, right?
No.
You get on Uber Eats and you type.
You didn't even do Instacart.
You did Uber Eats.
Oh, so Main Instacart may have been better.
It goes to like Sephora.
Okay, fuck.
Okay.
I should have done that.
So I go to Uber Eats and I type women's underwear.
Only option is women's incontinence depends.
That would have been hot.
Okay, so I was like, I can't do this to cutie.
I need to get more thoughtful gifts.
So I worked with the Uber Eats driver to tell him to go find a replacement underwear.
And so he went shopping for me.
Honestly, I don't want you to be sad about this because this was probably when they talk about our podcast many moons from now.
The bra and panties or the bra and underwear party, this will be one of our funniest of all time.
So also, originally, I had ordered lactating a lactating bra, but the guy couldn't find it.
So I said, just get a bra and panties.
I said, and he's like, does the size matter?
And I said, no, just get any size of anything.
All boobs are the same.
I mean, to be honest, it's kind of like I can squeeze into some underwear.
Yeah, you can.
I could get into some larges or smalls.
Why don't you know that tube sock on your WiiWi?
The entire point of the bra is that there's a size for it because there's a cup size for it.
So it's like not restricted.
Honestly, Austin, I feel better as a human.
I feel lighter than what I just hear.
Did you feel better as a human?
I don't feel any different.
Okay.
Yeah.
That was spectacular.
That was top 10 all time.
I'm telling you, it would have been worse if this is what you should have forgotten.
If you should have forgot, like, it would have been funny.
It would have been a brief moment, but like, this is so much fun here.
Dude, her pulling this out.
My brain chemistry changed.
It was $14.99.
Yeah, it's not the price.
It's the thought.
Sorry, sorry.
Or rather, the lack of thought that he put in.
It was not.
That's crazy.
They upcharge a lot on Uber.
That was a $40 situation.
Yeah.
So, wait, that actually matches.
Yeah.
Okay.
Anyway.
So Malcolm in the Middle is coming back.
It is?
Yeah.
It is an announcement.
Wait, what about the kid that's on him?
Doesn't he have like memory issues or something?
Wait, Frankie Munez is like a pro race car driver, right?
Wait, who has memory issues?
I thought the kid in Malcolm in the middle, Malcolm, has significant memory issues or something.
No, I thought he was driving professional cars.
Yeah, there you go.
Okay.
Frankie Munez was my first like gay awakening.
Can you look?
Wait, really?
Wait, Paul.
What the fuck?
Frankie, what?
Hold on.
When I was like, okay, now, Agent Cody Banks.
Ah, when I was like, I was like, I was like eight.
Yeah, no, that's fine.
Can you look up Frankie Munez's disability?
Yeah, no, straight up.
I think the hardest.
Very first, very first.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
He has a bad memory.
Exaggerated Memory Loss00:02:40
No, no, he has like memory loss.
He has like actual memory loss.
It says exaggerated as memory loss.
Oh.
Am I crazy?
Well, it sounds like it was exaggerated.
He has trouble distinguishing between dreams and reality.
What?
Goodness.
Oh.
Mini strokes.
Whoa.
Yeah, I know.
Oh, because that's what I remember.
I remember him being like, he has no memory whatsoever.
He's lost.
I know he's doing like professional driving now, which is really interesting.
Can we look that up as well?
Frankie Munez driver.
What is going on with this guy?
He's just doing so much.
He's the guy, man.
There you go.
Yeah.
That's cool.
He looks like he would be a race car driver.
Especially with that goatee.
Kind of looks like Zelensky.
Doesn't it?
Well, people are very excited about the return of Malcolm in the Middle.
Were you guys Malcolm in the Middle people?
Yeah, I remember when Huey went missing.
Yeah.
And like it was like on McDonald's commercials or whatever.
Like it was everywhere.
Yep.
I think one of the best episodes of television ever is the power walking episode where the dad becomes obsessed with power walking and then gets into it like a power walking.
Marsh is grunting in approval.
Ludwig has this weird habit where he watches TV shows, but only through TikTok or YouTube shorts.
Don't ask me.
Oh, I hate that.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I don't know.
No, I hate that so much.
I don't like it either.
No, it's AI voice.
No, it's AI voice summaries that are that are like two minutes long maximum that literally will summarize shittily an entire episode of a TV show.
No, he he'll watch the clip.
He'll watch the actual clip, not just the AI.
Oh, okay.
Which is whatever.
But there was a Malcolm in the Middle episode where they come home early and they find out that there was a street festival on their street that they throw every single time that they leave town or whatever.
And then, um, and then and then Malcolm is like saying to his parents, why are you going to the street festival?
Clearly everyone in this neighborhood hates you.
And then the dad is like, it's better they hate us than a minority.
And then with streamer awards, when I was getting hate, Ludwig kept quoting that.
And he'd be like, it's better they hate you than a minority.
And I was like, okay.
That's a banger line.
I know.
That's very funny.
I've never watched Malcolm in the Middle.
I was not in this country when it was being released.
And I didn't get it in Turkey for some reason.
In Turkland.
Maybe they didn't want Turkish people to know about Malcolm and the Turkish that he gets into.
Mohammed in the middle.
Yeah.
Singles Ward Mixers00:03:11
I did a messy button.
Did it work?
Yeah.
Looks great.
You look great.
You like my little pilgrim outfit?
It's work.
It's got booty shorts, but they go on my ass.
Cutie, I have to recognize this.
You have been throwing fucking fits.
You have been putting that shit on every episode for the past, like, I don't know, four episodes you've been on over the course of like eight episodes.
Once I figure out my makeup, it's over for you, bitches.
Oh, I think you've wait, Cutie.
I wanted to ask you something.
Did you know that there's a big Mormon movie in the mainstream?
Have you heard of Heretic?
Uh-uh.
Heretic is about two Mormon missionaries that end up in a bit of trouble.
Ooh.
Like sexy trouble?
No.
Is it like sexy?
No, it's like sexy.
It's with Hugh Grant.
He was nominated at the globe.
I've heard of this, I think.
Why is he wearing my glasses?
I didn't know this.
Yeah, true.
I didn't know this, but both of the lead actresses are formerly Mormons in that.
Oh, really?
That's interesting.
Yeah.
Formy Mormies.
Formy Mormies.
And they do a spectacular job.
It's actually a really very solid horror film.
Okay.
Yeah, I'll have to watch it.
I do think one day for a Patreon episode, I'm going to make you watch.
So there's some Mormon classics like made for Mormon movies.
Okay.
Yeah.
Like Singles Ward.
The best two years.
I know Singles Ward.
Yeah.
Oh, have you watched it?
I've watched pieces of it.
Oh, it's phenomenal.
It's so bad.
Yeah.
So I think we'll have to do that at some point.
Singles Ward is like men trying to partner up with women, right?
Like once, yeah, once you are over the age of 18, you no longer go to the family ward with your family.
You go to the singles ward with other singles.
What's the ward?
Oh, I need a pen and paper for sure.
Do we have one of those?
Wait, what?
What?
Why?
Or I could hop on the PC and do MS Paint.
This is insane.
It's the only way.
I'm a visual girl and my words don't work.
Oh, right.
Okay.
Whoa.
We got like the blues clues book.
Okay.
So, so we have all these houses.
Okay.
And there's a church right here.
Okay.
Okay.
So that's a church.
So in order to fit everyone in, there's different wards.
So first ward goes from nine to one, they go here.
And then second ward goes from one to four, they go here.
Okay.
And so, but one of these is a family ward.
One of these is a singles ward.
So if you're singles ward, it's just the, so you can find someone to marry.
So that's like, if I was to ever visit the church, I got to go to a singles ward because that's like the mixer.
Yeah.
I mean, do single normies ever go to scam on Mormon girls?
I don't know, maybe.
It would be hard to get.
I think Joseph Smith would look at the money.
Do they frequently ever like bait normie men into the Mormon church with their single hussies?
They're like not very good at being hussies, admittedly.
But like.
They can be lip hungry.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, maybe.
I mean, if you're in Provo and you're not Mormon.
What's Provo?
Oh, Provo is where BYU is.
Oh, it's a location, physical location.
Safer Flights In Japan00:07:13
Yeah, yeah.
It's in Japan.
Wards are different, like seatings for the church.
Yeah.
And then all the wards are a part of a steak.
Okay.
So all the games throughout the neighborhood go to the steak center.
And then bigger than that, I don't remember.
But then there's like the general conference, which covers everybody.
So sometimes you'll have steak conference and then sometimes you'll have general.
Dude, you know what I was thinking?
You should make a Joseph Smith coin.
Oh my God.
A crypto targeted at Mormons?
Yes.
I feel like it'd be the only thing that doesn't get rugged.
I take my tithing back.
I like that.
Then you could advertise it like on one of those infomercials.
Yeah.
After the Trump, the people, the makers of Provost Most Eligible want me and Hassan to go be on an episode.
Oh.
Well, now we can fly.
So.
Yeah.
You want to come to Japan now?
Yeah, come on, Cutie.
That one's too much.
That's too much of a jump.
The reason why the reason why I asked if Maya is like your hyperfixation is because we're going to bring her if that's the only way you can fly.
Finn's coming now.
Oh, Finn's bad juju.
Just get in.
Just get in.
I've never heard anyone say that about Finn's the best.
I'm not ready.
I'm not ready for that long.
I'm going to try to work up to a five-hour flight.
So maybe New York is an option soon.
But cutie, we could go to Hawaii and stop.
That one I'm scared about because that's the closest thing that anyone would bomb.
What are you talking?
What do you mean, bomb?
Cutie, I mean this when I say this.
I don't even know what the fuck you mean.
So let me tell you, let me tell you something, cutie.
The United States of America is the most lethal fighting force.
Are you worried about Pearl Harbor 2?
Yeah.
It's the closest thing.
Who's going to bomb Hawaii?
I don't know.
They don't.
Imperial Japan.
I don't know.
You know what we've been laying in wait since the end of the year.
You know, we fucking nuked them twice.
Keep playing your PlayStation America.
But you never know when someone's mad.
What about like Russia?
Emperor Hirohito has been frozen.
If Russia's going to make any action, it's one, going to be cyber warfare, which they're already conducting.
And they got their hands busy with Ukraine right now and Syria.
And not only that, but they would probably do military actions in Alaska.
Yeah.
I think honestly, the answer to you going to Japan is we take whatever Marsh has left from his last rave.
We give you that.
Yeah.
And you like cocktail and you'll love the flight.
Just a cocktail.
Cutie, like, it's like, first of all, it's an Airbus.
Okay.
They fly on the Airbus.
And it is a beautiful point.
I mean, we'll get you first class tickets.
Cost is $10,000.
Yeah.
Yeah, sure.
I mean, whatever you guys want to spend it on, except it's your prerogative.
In fact, you know what?
I can, I've got an extra upgrade certificate.
We could probably apply and save some money on that $10,000.
No, get this.
Private.
I got to work my way up.
Hold on.
Get this private access, Delta One at LAX, private entrance, private security.
He really wants us to fly with him on the Delta plan.
Yes, fly with me on Delta One.
And the only reason why he wants to do that is because he has Delta coupons.
I mean, I did use my, I'm saving.
I'm you guys, how many do you have?
Oh, I'll pay for the base tickets if you if I use my thing.
We'll upgrade me out of it other than friendship.
You know what?
That's right.
That's right.
I mean, they do, they do have probably a combined $25,000 value, but I would do it for friendship.
Jesus.
Yeah.
Now, okay.
Why don't you just use that as your 10K?
Oh, no, it's not a substitute.
Stupid.
No, it would be a great substitute.
It's not a substitute for the actual 10,000 cold hits.
I'm just holding my hands.
Now, hold on.
10,000 cold hard bombing.
I think, QD, it would be so great.
I got to work my way up.
Cutie, but yep, you already got to count our blessings.
You already did the flight.
Technically, like the trauma that you went through is much.
You know what's crazy, QT?
He's right.
I think you would enjoy Japan more than anybody because you are a safety freak.
And there is nowhere safer than Japan.
And that's not bullshit.
And you'll hear about earthquakes.
No.
No.
Again, okay.
Earthquakes, you're right.
They exist, right?
They happen in Japan.
Super safe.
Super safe.
They're all you could be on.
You could literally be on a high rise.
Yeah.
And you would be fine.
After like the eighth time Godzilla attacked, they changed the code for everything.
Like everybody in Japan is extremely friendly and hardworking.
Or even if they're not, they're like too ashamed to say anything.
So you think, like on your end, the experience will be very pleasant.
Yep.
So like, but I'm telling you, QD, the planes that you fly over there, in fact, it is safer.
There is more precaution taken on an international flight and more procedures to make sure that you're safe going internationally because you're dealing with a handshake between two nations.
It's much safer than even a domestic flight.
There's much more care and forethought that the turnover time to turn over an international flight is longer than a domestic flight.
Can you, can you, March, can you pull this up?
I want cutie to see like the precautions that the Japanese luggage handler take.
When receiving your bags.
When receiving your baggage.
Just so you understand how different things are over there.
Yeah, down to the down to every detail.
Yes.
Just look up like Japanese luggage handler.
Also, it's so efficient.
When I landed in Japan, I hung out at the airport for like 45 minutes because I got through customs so quickly.
Yes.
Yeah, it was insane.
Look at this.
Ah, look.
How your luggage is shandled in the U.S. Yep.
How it's handled in the UK.
How it's handled in Australia.
How it's handled in Japan.
Yes.
Two-man operation.
And safety.
Look, gloves.
Helmets.
Helmets.
White gloves.
And then, and yeah, there's a guy specifically that like places it gently to catch it.
Yeah.
And then they the guy, once they once they finish, once they finalize putting it on the cart, they they bow to the cart after they're done.
Yep.
And they also have it like every single person that is on the runway will literally stand in single file line and wave away the plane.
Also, cutie, the pilots on the international flights are the most experienced pilots in the industry.
In order to get up to a seniority to fly those bigger planes, you are literally like gray-haired, naval, marine, battle-hardened, battle-tested, everything.
Wizard Of Oz Fan00:07:47
I feel like you can say whatever you want.
The cocktail turning.
The cognits are turning in your mind, I think.
I've been replaying the words of Defying Gravity mostly.
Because I probably's like space, but the lyrics are Western Scottish.
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
You've been holding space for me.
I'm going to be Alphaba someday.
Give me your finger.
You've been holding space.
I've been holding a lot of space for him because I don't know him.
I'm new to Wicked.
Yeah.
Oh, you're new to Wicked.
I went to Wicked last night and I brought my playbill.
Now, just to clarify, she went to the show.
She did not go to the film.
I have not seen the film, but the first page of the playbill is an ad for prep.
Yes.
Yeah.
We were all talking about it.
We'd all take prep for a sponsor on this podcast.
Which I think is very funny.
Take the stage with a different prep.
That's right.
Everybody should be on prep.
A man's stage.
I mean, it makes sense.
They know their audience.
They know their target audience.
Yeah.
It was good, though.
Are you an Alphaba or are you a Glenda?
Hmm.
What is this?
Popular.
You're a Glenda.
What is Wicked?
What is it?
Oh, my God.
Wait, wait, wait.
You don't know Wicked?
Hold the fuck.
Hold the fucking phone.
No, But you know what Wicked is, Marsh.
You don't know what Wicked is?
No, it's like a Broadway show, right?
But do you know what the plot is?
No.
Oh, my God.
It's actually so spicy.
Like, they glaze over so much tea.
He doesn't even know.
It's like a prequel to Wizard of Oz.
Oh, okay.
Where it was like one of the first kind of what-if shows where it's like, what if the Wicked Witch of the West was actually not so bad?
I got some interesting history about that.
I don't know the actual name of the actress, the original actress that played the Wicked Witch.
Adina Manzel in The Wizard of Oz.
No, no, the original Wizard of Wizard.
Margaret Thatcher.
No, Margaret.
I don't know.
Look at that.
Marsh Hoop ever played the original Wicked Witch.
Popular.
In The Wizard of Oz.
Well, while we figure out what her name was, she actually thought while she was doing the character as the witch.
Margaret Hamilton.
I'm good.
She thought of the witch as being misunderstood.
And the roots of her perception of the witch when she was playing the character were the roots of what eventually became wicked.
Wow.
Yeah.
Or inspiration came from the original witch.
When you're gay, does this information just beam down into your mind or something?
You know what?
Why do you know that?
I was actually, I was on a YouTube spiral and I was like looking, I was trying to figure out like what happened to the guy that got like poisoned by the paint.
The paint.
The tin man paint.
Yeah.
The tin man paint.
And I was like, evidently he lived like a full life after that.
Yeah, he survived.
Blood poisoning didn't take him.
Yeah, it didn't take him.
But there was like a lot of stuff that happened on that set that was crazy.
And she lived a long time too.
She like...
Hilda Rodner?
Margaret.
Margaret, the witch.
Judy Garland, too.
Judy Garland, my bad.
Well, she, no, she OD'd, didn't she?
Well, she, yeah, but she lived a long time.
She lived a long time.
Do you guys know that the shoes from the Wizard of Oz were stolen and then recovered?
Oh, there's two pairs.
I think there's six pairs.
But recently sold at auction.
And they thought it was going to go for like $2 million.
And I think it sold for 24 million.
I heard they weren't the actual shoes.
No, there was like six pairs.
Oh, this was a stolen pair.
Speaking of Wicked.
28 million there.
That's an insane amazing.
Speaking of Wicked, I do.
I know that we normally don't talk about politics on this podcast.
And we're not going to be talking about politics on this podcast, but I would really want you guys to watch just a brief snippet of Ben Shapiro reviews Wicked.
Marge, can you pull this up real quick?
No, no, no.
Trust me, it's worth it.
Okay, hold my hand through this journey.
Obviously, yes, hold my hand through this journey.
Now, cutie, do you know who Ben Shapiro is?
He talks really fast.
Okay, I don't know what he does, but you don't really, you don't really know anything about his worldview or anything like that.
I don't know anything about him.
I know he does politics.
Okay, Austin, but the opposite kind of thing.
I don't know who Ben Shapira is.
Click that first video for me, please.
I want to hear the response that people who know Ben Shapiro have to this review.
And I also want to hear what your first impression is.
You can even start it from the, you know, well, I guess, yeah, we can start it from this.
Uh, when he first starts talking, you, my pretty, and your little dog, too.
People are taking the lyrics of Defying Gravity and really holding space with that.
Yeah, I didn't know that that was happening.
I've seen it, yeah.
I work in queer media, pretty cool.
Some people without brains do an awful lot of talking.
Alrighty, folks, you've been waiting for it.
We're here to review the brand new Blockbuster musical.
I'm taken aback by his eyebrows.
His video sponsor, my friend's incredible.
Actually, here's the thing: the movie's good.
Movie's actually quite good.
So, let me give you the lead up.
I like the original musical.
I have some ideological problems with the musical that we can talk about, what it stands for, what is the moral that they're attempting to promulgate here.
Why the very books by Gregory Maguire are sort of a perversion of the original L. Frank Baum story?
But put all of that aside, as a movie, the movie is quite good.
So, let me begin with some of the thematic stuff.
Okay, so thematically, I'm a big fan of the original Oz books.
Okay, the original Oz books are innocent, they're for kids.
My daughter, who's 10, has read many of them.
They are not replete with a bunch of sort of woke ideology.
The Gregory McGuire books are very different because the entire books are predicated on the idea.
Actually, he does get into ideology here, but there's like a five-minute stint, okay, of Ben that I've seen go viral basically, where he just breaks it down as to why he truly admired this entire process.
And it's incredible to watch because you can see, like, here's a man who is a failed musician, a failed Hollywood scriptwriter who's talking about something he's actually passionate about.
And it really comes out.
And I wanted to, I wanted to just like I wanted to hear what your feedback is on this because he is so in-depth and pretty honest with his review of Over Wicked, regardless of like the ideology and stuff.
And it sucks that he just like came in hot with that.
I didn't see that part, I'd only seen his review overall.
Um, I think I'm a big Wizard of Oz fan.
Um, I've probably read every book on Wizard of Oz and like every Judy Garland biography in the whole wide world.
And he's wrong.
The original Wizard of Oz, Frank Ombaum, is not that wholesome.
The freaking lion freaking mercs people.
Oh, he kills people?
Yeah, he freaking goes crazy.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
That's all I have to say.
Is he owns Ben Shapiro?
YouTube.
He's a little strong.
A little wrong.
He's a little wrong.
But I mean, I saw it for the first time ever.
I've never seen Wicked.
Only, and I'm a bit of a purist, I think.
Because everyone would always tell me, because I loved Wizard of Oz, that I have to see Wiki.
Do you have to see Wicked?
And I was like, no.
I don't need anything extra.
But I saw it and it was good.
And I'll see the movie.
But it was good.
And I actually liked it.
I liked the tea.
There's lots of tea.
There's a lot of tea.
I saw it on the West End in London and it was wonderful.
I haven't seen the movie yet.
But I'm looking forward to it.
Lex King.
What?
Okay.
Speaking of a lot of tea, you will get a lot more tea behind the paywalls.
Unlock Exclusive Patreon Content00:01:16
Patreon.com slash fearand for $5, you'll get access to all of these episodes and a lot more special prizes.
But we'll see you on there.
Thank you so much, everybody, for coming together and finally putting a full squad episode of Fear And once again, a banger.
We'll talk about the streamer awards drama that Cutie Cinderella has not revealed yet as well behind the paywall.
So go to patreon.com/slash fear and for more.
Bye.
Bye.
Like, I can acknowledge that there's definitely been growth in individuals throughout all of Twitch, right?
Like, you've seen, like, you know, but I have not.
I mean, people don't say like the R word anymore.
You know what I'm saying?
Oh, no, they do all the time.
Well, some people don't.
It's not the case.
Some people don't.
Some people don't.
I'm saying, like, people grow and people change.
They really do.
You know?
Yeah, they change, they grow, they learn, they adapt, or whatever.
But like, yeah, it sucked.
It was super, that was super lame.
So, so then they get done and they go and they load all their awards in a urinal at the venue.
Yeah.
And they fake piss on them.
I got so many texts about that being like, I'm so sorry.