Austin Show and Cutie Cinderella dissect the Streamer Awards drama, including her Airbus A321 NEO flight refusal bet and a prank involving Bill Murray. They analyze the Assad regime's fall in Syria, recount an anarchist Uber ride in Portland, and debate their eclectic 2024 Spotify Wrapped featuring Dean Martin and Kim Petrus. The episode concludes with reflections on organic music curation versus curated lists, blending personal anecdotes from Oxford Union engagements with chaotic party stories to highlight the unpredictable nature of modern digital culture and travel. [Automatically generated summary]
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Flying Over Lebanon00:09:55
I don't think she's.
I lost to a Kaisanat gift last night.
Yeah.
While the Assad regime, after like 14 years of torture, was falling in real time.
I was sitting there waiting for the 11th Kaisenat victory.
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to an episode of Fear and where the cast and episode where the cast is biblically hungover after another amazing streamer awards in which the host of it is not here.
Yeah.
She's getting on a plane.
She is.
I don't know about that.
Who's the host of the show?
Cutie Cinderella.
I just, that doesn't, that name doesn't read for me at all.
By the way, we're going to Photoshop her into the thumbnail.
Gotcha.
And we're going to say she's here.
If she doesn't get on that plane, I'm going to crash out.
You know what?
You know what?
For those of you watching, Cutie will be here shortly.
Oh, yes.
I like that.
Well, honestly, I hope because there's only two ways out of this.
Okay.
She either gets on that fucking plane and then it's fine because I guess we get some extra content later down the line of like the fact that like we're we're taking that bitch to Japan if she gets on the plane Taylor Swift.
You know what I mean?
Like there's no way.
Kicking and screaming.
There's no way she gets to avoid that.
Okay.
The problem is cutie's afraid of flying.
And the only way to get somebody on a plane that's afraid of flying is you gotta, you gotta like sedate them.
You gotta rip.
Yeah, pull a ripcord.
Yeah.
No, you gotta sedate them with anesthesia.
But she's afraid of anesthesia.
Yeah, let's just give her some ketamine.
That's what I was thinking.
I don't really just dart.
I'm down.
Like sock full of quarters, the back of the head.
Jesus Christ.
No matter.
I'm telling you, there's no sock full of quarters.
Jesus Christ.
There's no, there's no.
Did you pick that one up in Turkey?
Jesus.
There's just no, yeah, bars of soap.
You put the bars of soap in the fucking sock.
How long will that last?
I mean, I guess once she's on the plane.
Yeah, so she starts picking up again.
No, because I'm done.
I'm done.
I'm done with this.
Yeah.
I'm done with cutie.
Okay.
This is the episode that she literally brings.
This is the episode that she like always has to do.
This is like the one episode.
Okay.
No.
So if she doesn't fucking fly out today, I'm done.
Okay.
So I will say that she might not fly out today because she called me and asked me for flight advice and I gave her some.
She said, Austin, I'm flying on the A321.
I think if she doesn't fly out, we go back to Hassan and Will Fear.
No, We cut the I didn't.
I want to let you know it wasn't my fault, but before this happens, I want to let you know what I think will happen.
If she goes, you go.
No, I don't.
Get her on that plane plane, man.
I told him.
I told her.
Okay.
I didn't know.
So you convinced her not to.
You tell her it's 100%.
You convinced her not to fly.
No, I did not convince her to say she knows about all the fucking airline disasters, and I can't help myself.
She brings one up and I have to talk about it in great detail.
No, because there's the bet.
For those of you who don't know, Austin Show and I still have a $10,000 bet that he won't.
I never agreed to this bet.
Yes, you did.
We got back.
You did on camera.
I stand by what I said.
I will get an attorney.
You agreed to the bet on camera and then recommitted to the Ben Malta.
That'd be awesome content if we had a lawsuit about $10,000.
Yeah, especially when you lose the lawsuit.
Wait, we should do, just as friends, we should just go to court.
I would do an episode of court.
That'd be fucking awesome.
Okay.
So cutie.
31-year-old.
That'd be awesome, Judge Judy.
So here's the deal.
Cutie calls me.
She's like, Austin, I'm on an A321 NEO.
I said, beautiful aircraft.
All right.
Love that plane.
Flew on it last week.
And she's like, oh, it's not like that.
She's like.
It's not that beautiful.
No, no.
She's like, it's great.
She's like, is it new?
But she like wants it to be new, but she doesn't want it to be too new because it's like untested.
So I said, it's the perfect amount.
I said, it's about six years old.
I said, you're perfect.
It's great.
First of all, all planes are safe, by the way.
It's just a ridiculous conversation to have.
But I digress.
She says, well, at least it's not that flight that crashed because the tubes froze over.
And I was like, oh, you're talking about the Air France A330 that crashed in Brazil in 2006.
And she's like, yeah, I didn't know that was an Airbus.
I thought it was a Boeing.
I said, no, it was an Airbus.
Because what am I supposed to do?
Lie?
Yes.
Okay.
Okay.
When your friend...
Okay.
Let me explain something to you.
When your friend has an irrational fear.
Right.
Okay.
Yep.
Like, let's say they're afraid of pickles.
Right.
Okay.
And they've just eaten a goddamn Dave's famous Wendy's Square hamburger.
And they're like, were there pickles on that?
And you know there was.
You don't go with your rational side and be like, yeah, there are pickles on there because they'll be like, I'm going to fucking kill myself.
You just say, no, there's never been a pickles on a Wendy's hamburger.
Let me lie your fucking ass off.
Let me defend myself here.
No.
I told her it was an Airbus, but I said, look, it was pilot error.
Come.
I told her it was pilot error.
I said, and then you went, which happens all the time.
No, I didn't say that.
This is the worst of both worlds.
This bitch is not going to Taylor Swift and she's not here for the podcast.
I don't think she lost.
I lost to a Kai Sonat gift last night.
While the Assad regime, after like 14 fucking years of torture, was falling in real time.
I was sitting there waiting for the 11th Kaisenat victory.
Speak on it.
So I can fucking support my friend Cutie, goddamn Cinderella.
And then she's not even here for the podcast.
Hey.
And she's not even flying.
And Hassan found out.
She might fly.
I'm going to give her the benefit of the doubt.
I'm going to give her the benefit of the doubt.
I don't think so.
I sat her down.
I sat her down last night.
I held her hand and I said, cutie.
You will die.
No.
I said, cutie.
If you fly, you will die.
I said, cutie.
All aviation experts.
All men died at the end of the day.
What is that?
They're dusty.
But a natural part of life.
And I said, cutie, Cinderella.
All aviation experts are baffled at the actions of that pilot on Air France.
Air France flight from Tuba.
Oh, my God, bro.
I said, it'll never happen again.
Dude, just notorious.
There's no precipitation.
I thought the fucking Airbuses were notorious for not actually having any issues.
Well, they did.
They stalled.
It stalled out.
So last night, Hassan found out that I'm from the Syrian part of Lebanon.
Dude, Let me, let's reverse real quick.
I am sitting there white knuckling watching like, you know, Turkish-backed militias and like HTS is like former Al-Qaeda going into Damascus.
Bashar al-Assad, brutal guy.
Fucking, we don't know where he is.
People are speculating they might have shot his flight down, right?
This is like what type of plane was that, Austin show.
Assad does have an Airbus.
Yeah, massive.
Okay, we don't even know if it was shot down or not.
But massively consequential things are unfolding, okay?
World-changing events in the region, very big implications.
Yeah, sure.
And I'm sitting through that, and Austin peeks over.
He's like, so what do you think?
Think the Assad regime is falling?
I'm like, yeah.
He goes, I'll have you know.
I'm actually Syrian.
I didn't say that.
I was like, what are you saying?
He goes, you know, my family's from the Syrian.
You know, my family is technically from Syria, but the Lebanese part of Syria.
Yeah.
Okay.
So, okay.
So let me be clear.
All right.
First of all, I'm Lebanese very proudly.
Okay.
I've said that for a long time.
It's on my Wikipedia page.
But so nobody, please don't change it to Austin as a Syrian American streamer because I'm Lebanese.
Okay.
But if you guys know history, at one point, Lebanon was Syria and my family immigrated from that part.
No, it's true.
I still think it's funny that he just like shape-shifts into whatever is happening.
He's like, dude, listen.
So I'm sorry what's happening for my brothers over there.
Something's going to happen in like Cypress.
Something's going to happen in Cyprus and be like, I'll have you know, my grandfather, actually Cypriot.
He loved vacationing on that beautiful island.
Okay.
But part of me is Cypriot.
It's just what it is.
Look, I stand by what I said.
I am from the Syrian part of Lebanon.
I stand by what I said.
It is geographically correct.
Oh, Jesus Christ.
But you know what?
I had a great time last night.
Wow.
Yeah.
I did too.
Doctor Prescriptions Needed00:08:24
Do you ever go see a doctor to get prescriptions legally?
All the time.
Really?
Do you ever use Zock Doc?
Will.
I love Zock Doc.
Really?
Tell me about it.
Well, let me tell you, it's a free app and website where you can search and compare high-quality in-network doctors.
Choose the right one for your needs and click to instantly book an appointment because you know how hard it is.
Sometimes you show up to the doctor.
Yeah.
They look at you like a stranger.
Yeah, because you're not in network.
That's right.
I hate that.
Yes.
Right?
We're talking about in-network appointments with more than 10,000, 100,000 healthcare providers across every specialty from mental health to dental care, eye care to skincare, and much more.
Plus, Zock Doc appointments happen fast, typically within just 24 to 72 hours of booking.
You can even score same-day appointments.
Yes, which is fantastic for people like me who have an issue and want it seen right now.
That's right.
So stop putting those doctors' appointments off and go to zocdoc.com slash fear and find some instant booking with a top-rated doctor today.
I stopped taking my ameprazole yesterday, which is prilosec.
It's an anti-acid medication.
And you know what?
I stopped taking it.
Do you sleep like a baby?
I slept so much better.
You're so stupid.
What?
Why were you taking it?
I thought I, okay, see, can I tell you?
I started getting sore throats and I was like, oh, fuck.
Clap.
No, no.
No, not gonorrhea.
I'm selfless.
I did have gonorrhea.
We know.
Wait, no.
Actually, you know what?
It was around the same time.
Oh.
I thought I had fucking, what was it?
Acid reflux, but it was just gonorrhea.
So I start taking prilose.
So, so I stopped.
I like that he hit you like, you know.
You know.
You know, that's cutie.
You guys have.
I have not had gonorrhea.
And also, you've had no idea, right?
No, you've been so fucked up.
Why are you pulling me into this?
No.
Come on.
You definitely have had something.
Put your dick in some strange holes.
He's just like, come on, come on.
Give me a lifelong.
You have, definitely had something.
No, I get it.
This is homophobic.
I get it.
Yeah, dude.
This is homophobic.
Oh, fucking sick.
The gay guy has caught something.
Yeah, yeah.
Neither one of us have ever had any.
Look, I was always careful, except that one or two times when I went up.
Okay, and I got something.
But no, but I love that you, what I'm saying was you looked at Will like, come on, you know, not because of the gonorrhea thing.
He took it there.
But you've gotta do it.
But you were asking him because you're looking for a fellow hypochondriac who is currently not here.
Yeah, she's not here.
That would normally be cutie.
You'd be like, come on, you know, and cutie be like, yeah, I love taking random medication when I also feel like I have issues.
So for those of you that don't know, Prilosec is a medication to treat acid reflux.
It's only meant, yeah, it's a PPI, proton pump inhibitor.
Okay.
For those of you that don't know this, you're only supposed to take it for proton pump you.
I love pro that's my favorite proton pump inhibitor.
So proton pumps in your body are the things that produce acid, and an inhibitor is things that stop that production.
Proton pump inhibitors have a tendency to make you sleepless at night.
Well, I don't know if that's the case.
I read that it causes insomnia.
I've been really.
I'm saying we're doing an ad.
We're doing an ad for your favorite anti-acid.
So I take this medication about a year ago because I have a sore throat and I'm like, oh, acid reflux runs in the family.
You're only supposed to take it for 14 days.
If you have severe acid reflux, you can take it forever.
How long did you take it?
A year.
Okay.
No.
No.
So I'm every day for a year.
Pause.
But the problem.
Pause.
Pause.
You had a scratchy throat.
Yeah.
For like one day.
I kept getting sick.
And it was because of gonorrhea.
You too.
It wasn't from gonorrhea.
I don't know yet.
Prilose.
Allegedly.
For a year.
A year.
But the problem with Prilosec is your body gets addicted to it.
So if you start taking it, here we are.
How am I supposed to?
How is anybody supposed to relate to this?
There's people I'm sure out there that are having prilose.
Yeah.
People's grandparents who accidentally turned on the fucking YouTube TV.
You got to be prescribed by a doctor.
I don't even know why I'm doing this.
Austin, I'm telling you right now.
You're supposed to take it for 14 days.
You took it for a year.
You can take it for a year.
Austin, the story that you're telling is going to be.
But you don't have acid reflux.
I don't know, actually.
I'm not sure.
How do you not know?
I've had a scope.
Were you burping last night?
Did you feel like it was coming up?
Let me tell you something.
You didn't take it.
You didn't take the prilose.
I took it this morning.
You have to taper off.
Wait, you did take it?
Because your body gets addicted to it.
And all the doctors in the chat.
Well, I don't know if we have any doctors.
Proton pumps.
His proton pumps.
If he just goes off in cold dirty.
He's going to be pumping protons.
You're right.
You're right.
No, unironically, you're right.
He's like, I got seizures.
No, your proton pumps.
Well, there's an acid reflux.
He pops it in the morning.
He's like, hair the dog.
He just becomes like an X-Men.
Yeah, you got to take that proton.
Your body is.
Captain Proton.
As a consequence of the proton pump being inhibited, your body's like, oh, shit, there's no inhibitation.
My protons are feeling extra-inhibited.
So they'll work overtime.
Steroids.
It's like when you, it's like when you push down your estrogen and then come off the edge.
It just shoots up.
Right.
So I got to tape Robin.
But I want to say I'm proud because I slept like a baby last night because I wasn't on my PPI.
And I've been having insomnia.
I also had really good sex last night.
Sorry.
You know what?
That was inappropriate.
I'm sorry about that.
It was proton.
It was proton pumping somebody.
I'm sorry.
I don't know why I said that.
That was just, we don't.
You guys don't want to hear about my gay shit like that.
I like what you're talking about.
No, I like your gay.
I don't mind hearing about your gay shit.
You just get real crass sometimes.
What do you mean, crap?
Yeah, I had some fucking sisters.
Yeah.
Hold on.
If I, if I spread some treats.
If there was another universe when I came in here and I was like, bro, that pussy.
When have we ever done that awesome show?
Like, what are you talking about?
The year plus we've done this pod together.
When have he and I ever come into midland?
We shelled some fish last night.
I got in that wound.
I was eating that book.
I was balls deep.
I said a dick pic and a voice memo of myself crying.
That's because you guys are older now.
But if they were younger, what the fuck?
See, I bitch, you're RAID!
No, no, I know.
He's fantasizing.
But I'm fantasizing about a bro life.
Like, we're all in our late 20s or something.
I'm living the bro life you guys lived in your early 20s now in my early 30s.
No, but it doesn't matter.
You're still 30.
You can't do that.
Your proton pumps would explode if you ever tried to live the bro.
You can't.
I'm so shocked you guys didn't get nothing.
That's bullshit.
I was a hoe for like three months.
Yeah.
And I fucking got like it like insane.
It's because we were hitting that top shelf.
Yeah.
We were trolling for bottom shelf.
I thought I was.
It was a phase.
It was a phase for him.
I thought it was top shelf.
It was a phase for him.
It was a phase for him.
But let everybody know it's top shelf now.
Please.
Somebody, please let them know.
Austin has not gotten any STDs lately.
No.
I am clean.
And for the record, I have always been on prep.
That's right.
Thank you.
Fantastic.
That was the very gay-informed way of saying it.
And I don't have AIDS.
Also, you should be on prep regardless, right?
Yes, you should be on prep regardless.
Yes.
Absolutely.
Get on prep.
This is why we had this conversation today.
Yes.
There's got to be a purpose.
There's a purpose of this conversation.
There's a lesson to be.
You should go to your doctor, get tested, and also get on prep and take Doxie Pep.
Don't Fly Airbus00:15:10
And don't fly in an Airbus.
Yes.
Yeah.
The death trap.
Yes.
Unless you're Puty Cinderella and you're about to win $10,000.
Yeah.
No, no.
I just, I truly do believe she's not getting on that plane.
Yeah, okay, but that means you poisoned the well.
I did not.
I always try to comfort her.
You poisoned the well.
I always tell her, I said, you can do this.
Bro, take credit.
He's like a vizier in like a Disney movie.
Quietly, like, yes, my pretty.
Don't get on the plane.
I told her I would fly this.
That's the one from Aladdin.
What's his name?
Jafar.
Jafar.
He's like, don't get on the plane.
Hold on.
I want to let you guys know.
13 accidents so far in 2024.
I told her.
I told her, I said, Cutie, if you make it.
Dude, this would have been valid and worth it if you convinced her not to go on the plane.
And then she fucking showed up for the podcast.
Yeah.
I did.
But she's not even showing up for the podcast.
I think if we would have done it later, she would have shown up.
Okay.
No, no, she wouldn't have.
She hates doing this podcast.
Yeah, she didn't even shout it.
She could easily shout us out at the Streamer Awards.
Yeah.
No, she's going to say She played the other ad and then she said, Oh, and my other podcast is here and it's awkward.
Oh, that was our shout out.
Okay, yeah.
She's so embarrassed by us.
It's crazy.
It's crazy.
She hates us.
I got a question, Hassan, for Hassan.
You can chime in.
I had an Uber drive home, and I'm pretty sure my Uber driver was an anarchist.
Okay.
Okay.
Here's the signs.
Give us the signs.
First of all, I get in the car, mask, which is totally fine.
He turns around and says, I hate the cabinet.
It was they, them.
Yeah.
Because their pronouns were there, they had their pronouns on the dashboard, which is great.
Love it.
Fantastic.
I was awesome.
You think the person that had printed out rules and pronouns was an anarchist?
You know what?
I'm not going to see it.
Stickers all on the dashboard.
Okay, anarchists, for sure.
Yeah, all on the dashboard.
No, anarchists.
And one of them's ACAB, eat more pussy, like insane.
Also, like.
It's a wild thing.
Eat more pussy.
I mean, there's a chance they're watching this podcast because I'll tell you more.
Oh, did they recognize who you are?
No, I don't know if they, it was dark.
I knew, I just didn't.
I was like, I want to want to ask if you know Hassan because Carl Marx on the fucking, she had like a pamphlet.
I know Carl.
Yeah.
So let me let me let me paint the scene.
This has had to be Hassan Abihet.
Get in the car.
Yeah, this sounds like this sounds like one of mine.
Hold on.
Mask, stickers everywhere.
They them pronouns.
Perfectly.
Love that.
All right.
Perfectly love that.
Love that.
What does he even say?
He's doing PR for a non-existent situation where he gets canceled for making fun of the stickers on someone's dash because they're they, them pronouns.
Love that they are them.
I'm delirious, man.
Oh, this man's gonna run for office.
I love that they are them.
I love all the genders, all of them.
You unironically just dropped the hardest rap bar of 2020.
I love that they are them.
I love that they are them.
Wait, that's hot.
That's hot.
That's a good line.
That's good.
I love that they're them.
That's awesome.
That's going to be the most progressive.
That bitch might be a they are them.
I love that they are them.
God damn, hit me up.
All right, copyright.
Yes.
Anyway, stickers everywhere.
They are them.
Yes.
Karl Marx in the visor.
This is how I knew.
Hassan Abihit, Subaru.
Okay.
14 miles till empty.
Dude, explain.
I don't know.
Explain why the Subaru riding around on empty is a song coded.
I don't know.
Because they're broke.
That's what it is.
They're broke and they're broke socially.
And they spend all their money on gifted subs.
And this rich asshole gets in the Uber.
He's like, oh, fucking God.
Hold on.
It was a lovely ride and they were great.
Were you white-knuckling that they were going to run out of gas?
I'll be honest.
I thought they were.
I thought that they were.
I was hoping that they did.
I thought they was.
I was a little.
I was true.
I was white-knuckling.
I bet he was.
Do you think they're going to run out of fuel?
No, I was alone.
Are we going to be caught in downtown balls?
No, I know he's like.
I was like, damn, you.
Subaru's get good gas mileage, though.
No, I know, but we were driving far away from any gas station.
Yeah.
And I was like, driving, I was like, damn.
Where in Los Angeles were you driving?
I was in Oregon.
Oh, I thought this was Los Angeles.
No, this is Portland.
No, no.
This is Portland anarchist.
Last night.
Last night, my Uber driver was on ketamine.
Know what the fuck was going on?
Yeah, he was driving in between the lanes.
Wow, and I was like, I didn't notice until we were almost there.
So I was like, oh, thank God.
But anyway, I'm pretty sure.
I don't know.
I was afraid they were going to like, I thought that I was, because I was thinking about this.
Okay.
I have really bad anxiety and paranoia.
So I was like, oh, shit.
I bet they did too.
No.
Like, what do you mean?
I thought, I was like, oh, shit, what if they think I'm like everything they hate?
You know what I mean?
Like, what if, like, speak on it?
I'm, I'm, the logic threads today aren't immediately clicking for me.
So you're going to have to walk me through that one too.
Like, you thought that they thought that you were.
I was like, what if they think I'm going to saush a shivering homosexual man in the back seat?
And they're like, that's it.
That's the face of Cat.
I just hope they don't think that I'm.
I'm like, I'm fucking.
Yes.
I hope they.
I just hope that they think that I am on their side.
So what did you say to get him on board?
Well, I was terrible.
I didn't say anything.
Because he's worried at this point.
He's worried at this point that he's going to like, you know, dox his house to a Hasan Hobby head.
So he doesn't want to fucking reveal that, probably.
Yeah.
I assume.
That was exactly what I was saying.
But I was fighting this urge for attention.
You're so.
I was like, I really want to know if this is.
No, it wasn't attention.
Let me write Walking Back.
I was fighting the urge to be right.
Because I was like, I want to know so bad if you know who Hassan Piker is.
The answer is yes, bro.
I would be, if they didn't know who you were, that would have been the biggest flop.
Yeah.
Of course.
Dude, it's not even a question.
They must have.
Karl Marx.
It's not even a question.
14 miles.
They're probably in the Discord right now being like, bro, I gave Austin a car ride and he was so awkward the entire time.
No, it's just Austin in the backseat trying not to look like Austin Shoe.
Hold on.
Also, the ride didn't start off that great because I was like five minutes late getting in the car because I was in line at the coat check and I couldn't get my coat.
Did you call black?
No, it was like a they don't really have black in Portland.
Also, yeah, no, it was a comfort.
There's no, there's no Uber black that has ACAP stickers on.
Yeah, no, I didn't know this.
Do you guys know that black has a built-in feature where you have 15 minutes before?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Or yeah, with, yeah.
But before we move on, they were an amazing driver.
Thanks.
No, I'm serious.
They were amazing driver.
The ride was comfortable.
You know what?
I have to tell you.
I mean, other than you living in fear, it was I was drunk and I haven't had an opportunity to tip them yet, which I'm going to do that right now.
Wait, wasn't this?
He's doing, he's doing fucking get him in an ice cream shop.
He's Joe Biden.
Yeah, he's going to start kissing.
You got a ride history?
Where are we at here?
Okay.
All right.
You know what?
Okay.
Tip a thousand.
Now, hold on.
Hold on.
I'm going to tip 25%.
There we go.
That's what I'm talking about.
Fantastic.
Oh, fuck.
Fuck it.
It wasn't a Subaru.
It was a Kia.
Okay.
I thought it was a Subaru.
Well, in any case.
They're definitely going to see this clip for this podcast.
And then they're going to message us and be like, he left 20%.
No, 25%.
Yeah.
He left $2.
Hey, last night, I got to tell you guys, my W of the night, I met Jermaine Johnson from the New York Jets, baby.
Oh, yeah.
He's streaming.
He's dope as hell.
Yeah, we were hanging out.
He's streaming.
He's doing a sub-a-thon that will be running when this comes out tomorrow.
Yep.
And you need to rate him today for me.
What?
No.
Because I'll be at a concert.
So you got to rate him.
Oh, okay.
Okay.
So Jermaine Johnson, Pro Bowl linebacker for the New York Jets.
Yep.
Who's suffering from an Achilles injury?
Okay.
I go up to him and he's like, I introduce myself.
He has no idea who I am.
I say, you got to meet my buddy, Will Neff.
Yep.
He's a huge Jets fan.
He's like, meet Will Neff.
He fucking tackled me when I got here.
I love Will Neff.
I was so pumped.
Yeah.
Did you know him beforehand?
I had never met him, but I recognized him immediately and I was like, what are you doing here?
Awesome.
Yeah.
Fuck yeah.
How about you?
What did you have any good times?
No.
Oh, I ordered Sun Undone to the Streamer Awards.
I ordered a big bucket of Galbi Jim.
Yeah, Korean food.
Oh.
And my table feasted like kings.
I went over when I was gone for a little bit.
You ordered your own food to the streamer awards?
Bro, the amount of food that you get at these event shows, these award shows is like so minimal.
I thought it was wonderful.
It's like one stick of chicken strip.
Like the fuck.
I mean, I, I, uh, listen, I was trying to, I was trying to like spread out and enjoy myself.
You know what I mean?
Look, I, I mean, I ate, I ate a couple.
Well, I, wait, wait, hold on.
No, Will, I got, you asked for a black coffee.
I want this now.
No.
I can't drink black coffee.
Why not?
No, I already do.
Look at this.
Oh, yeah.
Look at that.
Mr. Fan.
I thought it was funny.
I like that.
Hey, do you like it?
Yeah, I like it.
It looks good.
You guys think I should grow any more hair?
Yes.
I kind of shave right here.
I think you should grow your asshole hair out.
Braid it.
You know what?
I'm pretty well shaven.
Anyway, sorry, go ahead.
Marsh, where are you?
I need you to pull things up.
Get it back in there.
We've had some episodes where Marsh is so hungover, he's passed out on the couch in the other room.
You pass out one time producing an episode.
Marsh was having a bad time.
Marsh was having a blast.
Yeah.
He went to go see Snowstrippers.
Yeah.
My highlight of the night probably was the sun undone.
Is that where you went?
Yeah, that's where I went.
You left for a long time.
You didn't even girmishing.
He didn't even fucking tell me.
Yeah, because I wasn't trying to share.
Dog, there's a whole table full of people there eating your cut.
He cut me from the fucking list.
He didn't.
It was a big boy move only.
Yeah.
I mean, you're too dandy.
I mean, I did have two salads.
No, you're at your prilisec.
Peach got down on some Galbi Jim.
I know.
I felt a little threatened.
Yeah, Peachy.
I didn't like it.
She's a real eater.
Normally, I would care.
Like, normally I would rep that sort of thing, but this was a doggy dog situation.
Okay.
Situation is dire.
I haven't eaten all day.
We ran around.
I worked out.
We went.
We got clothes.
We got matching, kind of matching fits, Will and I.
Yeah.
Big mistake wearing the tap.
Oh my God.
Big news.
What?
We can't say who, but a celebrity bought the pontoon coat.
Oh, from HNF.
No, I remember.
No, no.
Yeah.
I remember now.
Oh.
Well, so we don't have to believe it.
Okay.
It's bleeped.
But that is incredible.
I know.
The pontoon coat is finally gone.
The H. Lorenzo pontoon coat.
Our fits were incredible.
I think we were throwing fits.
My fit was boring as fuck.
I decided, you know what?
I can't go shopping with these guys because they'll bully me into spending like 10 grand on an outfit.
Whoa.
Okay, first of all.
First of all, sorry, but like the last time I went to H. Lorenzo, I spent seven grand on an outfit.
And you returned it.
No.
Well, I returned the smelly shirt, but the rest of it I still have.
What was the rest of it?
A pair of pants?
No, the shirt, the pants were $3,000 pants.
The shoes were two grand.
The shirt was like $700, but the one that I returned was like a couple thousand bucks.
So regardless, I can't do it because you guys, I once a year we go low.
No, I know, I know, but like I can't do that because I just will never wear it again.
Why?
I don't know.
Those sparkly pants, I just like my gay friends have been borrowing for the last two years.
Damn.
They're like those glittery pants you wore at the stream.
It's been passed around.
Brotherhood of the traveling pants.
Yeah, they are.
They are.
They're being passed around.
Like they were, my fucking glittery pants were at fucking the sweat tour like multiple different times on multiple different days.
Yeah.
Like, anyway.
God, we're never going to be FaZe if we can't get you to go buy expensive clothes.
Okay, no, look, you know what?
Okay, okay.
Can I ask a question?
Ice.
I need some ice.
Much love to FaZe.
Yeah.
Much respect to FaZe.
Hey, FaZe up, baby.
Why did they put their awards in the toilet?
And they pissed on it.
No, I think it was fake piss, but I did not follow the logic.
Wait, I don't know.
Is that a reference to something?
I think they're saying, like, fuck, yo, we dominate.
Kanye pissed on his awards.
I mean, why would you want to do what Kanye did?
I don't know why.
I don't know why.
Yeah.
I did.
Big W's.
Yeah.
Big W's.
Wait, wait.
Pull up.
Free Philistine.
FaZe.
Thanks.
Yeah, pull that up for me, Jamie.
Chimpanzee Face Rip00:02:01
You'll pull up that video of the chimpanzee ripping off the guy's fucking face.
Yeah.
I did.
That was a good highlight of the night.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's it.
I did not understand this.
I did not get this.
Wait, is that a real picture?
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, okay, That is crazy.
I mean, good stream.
Look how well hydrated everybody is.
I think it's face.
Yeah, I think it's fake piss.
Okay.
Because one guy is straight up missing the urinal, bro.
Oh, yeah, that's water.
I mean, that could be P, though.
Very well.
You know what?
When you and the homies all whip your dicks out, sometimes it flies around.
You know what I mean?
You get excited.
We won't know.
Yeah, we will know when we go to the onset.
Yeah, they did well.
They did well, I think.
Yeah, these motherfuckers want to see my dick so bad.
Why you got to be weird about it, dude?
No, no.
It's odd.
All right.
You know what?
You know, it's no big deal.
I'm going to get my cock out.
Now he made it with me.
Wait, hold on.
Wait, this is genius.
To avoid the onset, I'm just going to make y'all uncomfortable the whole time.
I can't.
You can't do that.
Then it's creepy.
Yeah.
Fuck it.
It's supposed to be a freaking shit.
I can't wait to fucking get my cock out with y'all.
Oh.
Stroking in the onset.
Man, I can't wait to get naked.
Dude, we're calling it.
That sounds like a B52 song, stroking in the onset.
Stroking in the onset, baby.
I'm reconsidering it now.
For those of you who need context, in Japan, we are all going to do an onsen.
It's a bonding.
I'm going to see both of their penises, but that's not what it's about, evidently.
I don't know.
They keep talking.
They keep making it the central focus.
Do we have towels?
I don't know.
I'm going to get bullied by you guys.
No one is.
Making Guests Uncomfortable00:11:22
Yeah.
Oh, clicked.
Finn is coming.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
What was that?
I don't know, like, oh, oh, no, come on, that wasn't what it is.
Oh, no, no.
Will he be in the onset too?
Yes.
It's time for an American meu.
Oh, fuck.
Yeah.
I love that.
Okay, listen.
This one is a very simple one.
Jamie, I need you to pull something up for me, Billy Rave Brains.
Okay.
What's the graphic?
Okay, this week's graphic.
Let's, well, it's coming out tomorrow.
So let's just Washington crossing the Delaware, but with my face on it.
Perfect.
Okay.
Thank you.
Okay.
So we're going to borrow from another pod.
We're going to borrow from the Kelsey Brothers podcast.
Thank you.
Kelsey Brothers podcast.
So Bill Murray went on the Kelsey Brothers podcast.
You need to type in Bill Murray, Roadhouse, Kelseys.
Just watch this clip.
I saw this.
I want you guys to react to this.
I was cackling.
Bill Murray is still the funniest motherfucker on the planet.
And he's got this.
Yes, there you go.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Absolutely diabolical for this.
That's it.
Yeah.
There is.
All right.
Here it is.
Here's no, just watch it.
Just watch it.
A legend out there.
You used to call the husband of Kelly Lynch, who plays Dr. Clay, anytime a particular scene came on with Patrick Swayze on the television.
Is this rumor true?
One of the hardest things I ever had to do was to call a friend.
And at a late hour, I mean, very, very late.
I did not identify myself.
I just said, hey, as a friend, I think you should probably turn on TBS right now.
Because that son of Pat Swayze.
Slam it to your wife.
Oh, no.
So, okay.
For context, there was a legend that Bill Murray would call his buddy for years whose wife was in Roadhouse every time Roadhouse was on cable TV, right as the Patrick Swayze sex scene was coming on.
And he's just dogging her out.
And Bill Murray basically confirmed this legend.
And there's like, I don't know if you guys have ever heard of all the Bill Murray rumors, but there are all these crazy like Bill Murray stories where he'll like crash random weddings.
He'll like go into a grocery store and pay for someone's entire check and then be like, no one will believe that this happened to you.
And he'll just do random stuff like this.
But this is like one of the confirmed Bill Murray rumors is that he would call his buddy for years and not identify his house line and be like, you need to turn on TBS right now.
That's fucking off.
Which is insane.
And I think, what's the point of me bringing this up?
Well, first of all, Bill Murray, the funniest to ever do it.
I think people need to do more inside dumb stuff like this with their friends.
We need to bring back casually pranking your friends.
Oh, I love that.
Yeah.
I do that.
Okay.
What's the last prank you did?
Oh, oh my God.
Oh, you told Cutie Cinderella she was going to die on a plane.
Yeah.
The funny prank is Cutie just texted us in the group chat and said, okay, I'm not getting on the plane.
Let me try to save this.
Hold on.
I'll go to the.
Just, I don't even know if that's she's.
She's not getting on the plane.
Um, Kirk and I used to prank our friend Joe all the time.
You know Joe yeah our, we used to, we.
He used to be so pissed because we used to do this bit and we just annoy the fuck out of him.
We used to.
Okay, so it's a long ass inside joke.
I don't even know if I have to.
We have time to explain this, but we met Jesus Christ.
I'm gonna kill him.
What the fuck are you recording right now?
This is some sadistic shit.
Take your cock out.
Look, are you posting that on your story?
I'm posting it on the group channel.
Um, so we used to.
I met Mike Tyson yeah, and I uh smoke weed with him.
It was great, and Mike didn't know what the fuck we were there for.
Right, he was hired in a kite and he was like a part of some fucking, like fan controlled football league that we were playing.
And so Mike came out and um, he said, you know, he said hey hey, is this my team?
Like he had no fucking idea like what was going on.
He's like hey, is this my team?
Like, because we, it was like that's a really shitty Mike.
I don't know if that's it's.
It's honestly a perfect Mike Tyson if he was combined with Woody Allen.
No, it's just.
It was right there, though it was like close enough.
No, he said hey.
And so we we, we were all sitting there and you know it was.
It was basically for this thing where fans were going to control a football league right, and there were football teams right, and Mike owned one of the teams and we were there to like be the.
There was like creators.
We were gonna like promote it, whatever.
It never happened.
But we were sitting there and Mike didn't know what the was going on.
So he walks out, we're all sitting on the couch.
It's me Joe Kirk, and he's like, hey, is this my team?
And then um, we were, we just with Joe and Kirk, and I did this bit over and over again.
We were like Joe hey, is this my team?
Who's this Joe guy like the.
Who's this Joe?
Hey, Joe.
And then we got into this really thing, and so we would.
We would call Joe.
We would also be in a hotel together, like traveling to Europe, and we would call Joe in the middle of the night while he was going haze and we'd be like hello, is this a mr Joe?
Yeah, we would do like some accent and be like oh, who is this?
And hey Joe, it's Mike, we just fuck with him.
So I, you know we do, so we do some, that's good.
I'll prank call you guys in the hotel.
I like that.
If we all stay at a hotel in Japan, you're getting prank called.
Okay, we want to stay in a house.
Ever, prank your friends, we want to stay in a house.
Not really, I don't know, I can't really think of anything that I do this like a prank.
Okay, that's, i'm.
I'm a yeah, i'm a Joyless.
Have I ever told you guys about the uh, i'm a joyless man, the uh, cat fancy thing I used to do?
No, you guys never heard about the cat fancy thing I used to do.
Oh okay, so I I was in a fraternity and I didn't really believe in like hazing, hazing.
So I would do like fun fun, hazing.
And one of the things I would do is, a few times I would Buy a bunch of issues of cat fancy and I would hand it to pledges and I would be like, Cut out all these pictures of cats in cat fancy.
And when a brother was out with a with like a girl, I would have this pledge sneak in and put images of cats, like hundreds, hundreds and hundreds of images of cats all over his room.
So that when he came home, like his entire room was plastered in cats, but like not just on the walls.
Like he would open a drawer and there would be cats and you'd go to the bathroom and there'd be cats and you'd like flush the toilet and there'd be like a cat behind that.
So just cats everywhere.
And like the funniest thing to picture is this person trying to explain to like a drunken co-ed why there are so many and be like, these aren't my cats.
You don't understand.
I don't know how these fucking cats got.
These are not my cats.
Pulls back the bed cover cats.
Try to get laid.
Yes.
Yeah.
No, that would be the coolest.
You become a vibrant character at that point.
I feel like Hassan would be of the group of us.
He would be the best to prank.
Yeah, we're going to start pranking you.
You would be the best because you would like it the least.
I would be a good sport.
She didn't even respond to you.
I know.
I would be a good sport.
I think she wants me to kill all of you.
I think you'd be a good sport after the fact.
Yeah.
Depends on what it.
I mean, like, I was miserable during the date.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Will was saying last night that he's, he, he knows me so well that, like, I'm very sensitive to social cues.
And when something goes haywire, I fucking just take it.
Oh, should we mention what?
I don't want to mention it.
You don't have to say who it was.
Okay, but they no, we actually can't.
Yeah, we can't.
Okay.
Yeah, we can't mention it.
Oh, it's very there was a no, there was a hilarious mix up last night.
Yes.
But it's too involved.
Yeah, it's too involved.
It's too involved.
But any, but, but the gest of it is, is something, somebody got mixed up in the group and Will said when that happens, I will, nobody else notices, but Will notices that I get really stiff when somebody, when somebody says something that I know, hey, wait, wait, wait, without saying anything, do you know Austin's tick?
Like this?
Is that what you're talking about?
Do I do that?
Is that what you're talking about?
I didn't know I did that.
I actually, I actually found out last night.
Close, but the way you did it was funny.
Like I was having a stroke.
I can't feel my arm.
Wait, how?
Do I do this?
It's this right here.
Yeah.
Like Homelander.
No, literally.
He does the.
I didn't know I do that.
Yeah.
Is it?
Do I ever do it on camera?
It wants it to bloom in.
Really?
When something's falling apart.
Yeah.
That's what I said.
Wait, like, really?
Like, during lover host or something?
I go like, oh, shit.
Yeah.
Everybody's going to look at that.
They're not.
No.
No.
I didn't know I did that.
Yeah, you got a little tell.
Damn.
I didn't know that.
But see, people don't, because for me, in a social situation, my whole thing is when I'm in a circle of people talking, it has to maintain order.
I got you.
Like, we have to maintain order.
Like, every conversation I'm in, I'm hosting.
Yeah.
I'm always directing traffic.
Oh, we know.
I'm hosting, right?
I'm making sure everybody's included.
Like, if somebody's here and they're not in the conversation, we're all talking.
I get really uncomfortable.
Really?
Yeah.
So if somebody's sitting next to me and they're not involved in the conversation, why can't they just kind of like ill?
No, because I feel that they want to be involved.
Oh.
And I get, I feel the pressure.
So like, I'll be like, like, I have this guy last night.
I don't know who it was, but they were clearly like not in the conversation.
And I just threw him some shit.
We were talking about something very random.
I've gotten really good at just leaving conversations.
What do you do?
I mean, you did last night.
I was in many that you just departed.
I was like, oh, there goes Will.
I have a few now.
The bathroom where the drink is like a classic.
Laughing Like a Psychopath00:02:18
Yeah, that's a good one.
Yeah.
But the best one is now I'll just laugh really big like a psychopath and walk away.
Randomly?
I'll just go, God.
People don't know what to make of it.
Will, last night I was in a conversation with you and you just turned around and walked away.
There was no laugh.
There was no nothing.
I just booked it.
I was, I was like, but you know what?
You and I communicated.
See, you and I are both very advanced social creatures.
Yeah.
Hassan, not so much.
Hassan just doesn't care.
No, he just doesn't.
He doesn't got the charisma.
Like, if we were in politics.
If we were on a train, he'd be yeah, he'd be all over it.
It's normal to enjoy trains.
Look, let me tell you something.
I believe this wholeheartedly, Hassan.
If we were all to run for office, like if Will.
No, he would not.
He's tall and he's handsome.
No, no, no.
You and I would win if we were both running for office because his political acumen is far better if I was running for dictator.
No.
Hold on.
Americans don't vote on policy or intelligence.
Exactly.
He's tall and handsome.
He'd kill us.
I'd have to dial it up, though.
I'd have to care.
You'd have to knock it up.
No, you run for.
I'm going to primary you.
I'll be like, he's gay.
He's going to hell.
95% of the votes.
I'd vote for you if you ran.
Bashar al-Assad victory margin.
Yeah.
I would vote for you.
Yeah.
But I do think if you guys are running for office, I mean, you could run for office, Will.
I think you could become mayor.
I want to be mayor of Pinehurst one day.
I think you could do that.
That's my ambition.
Bro, they were fucking selling.
I forgot to take a picture of this in Abercrombie and Fitch.
They're selling fucking Pinehurst fucking.
Pinehurst is one of the nicest places in the United States.
Yeah, I was like, I invite you to all of you.
I'm ready.
He's not even listening anymore.
I'm ready to go to Pinehurst.
I'm also ready to go to the mountain.
The mountain.
The mountain.
Yeah, I'm ready to go to Montana.
Montana.
I'm ready to go to Montana.
I don't even know how to fly there.
Yeah, I was going to go spend more time in Montana, but I got a sick family member, so I'm going to spend some time in Michigan.
Ready for Montana00:03:53
Okay.
All right.
Well, whenever you want me to come, I will come.
Whatever you want me to come.
Whatever you want me there.
What else has happened this week?
Marsh, what's been happening this week?
Why are you asking him?
Pull it up.
Marsh and I.
So here, W's and L's of the week.
Let's go.
You know what?
Can I be honest?
You don't like that?
I don't like W's and L's.
I like it.
Because you know why?
It's not us.
I like it.
We're like trying to be FaZe.
I mean, it's just, that's just a placeholder for like something good to happen and something bad.
Let's call it something good.
Let's call it that.
Let's call it wins and losses.
Something good that happened, something bad.
Okay, I'm going to continue with the W's and L's, okay?
Because on God, I'm phased till I die.
Gross.
Okay.
If FaZe Banks can be a 35-year-old degenerate, so can I. He's 35.
You need more techniques.
No, he's my, he's my.
He pulls it off.
We can't pull it off.
I'm too old-coated.
Yeah, that's the other thing.
I'm too old-coated, too.
I've been old since I was young.
Yeah, FaZe Banks and myself are the same age.
Yeah.
Faze up.
Oh, fuck.
Guys, what?
We got to talk about our fucking Spotify rapped.
Oh, I don't have one.
Fuck.
I do.
You bloodless.
I don't have a Spotify.
So geek.
Last year.
I don't listen to me.
You bloodless geek.
Last year, I famously had Peppino Galgiardi as one of my top artists on Spotify.
Editor, please cut in three seconds of Peppino Galdiardio.
Yeah, right now.
Unfortunately, I have some bad news.
Pepino Galgiardi.
He's been unseated.
Unseated as my top artist.
I can't believe that.
Okay.
I need you guys to guess who my top artist of 2024 was.
Okay.
I'm Celine Dione.
No, it's Frank Sinatra.
Both of you are incorrect.
Ready?
Okay.
Wait.
Mariah Carey.
Chapel Roan.
No.
Damn.
I'm talking number one.
Wait, am I on there with some of these?
I will.
Mariah Carey's on.
Okay, I'm going to give you the list.
Okay.
My top artist of 2024, Dean Martin.
Oh, my God, bro.
Okay, so I was pretty much right.
Second artist, Chapel Roan.
Oh.
Wait, I'm like right in there.
Yeah.
Third artist, Ariana Grande.
Okay.
Fourth, Frank Sinatra.
Oh, so, okay, I was on the money.
I was on the money.
Fifth, Kim Petrus.
You're so fucking gay.
This is.
Except for.
Okay, okay.
Dude.
If you guys can get one of mine, if you guys can get one of mine, I will be impressed.
Because I got basically every one of Austin's.
Oh, God.
If you can get one of mine.
You like an animal.
Did you just sing one bar of nine-inch nails?
Yeah, I want to fuck you like an animal.
Yeah, nine-inch nails.
No.
Okay, all right.
It's going to be like Ice Peak or something.
I will help you.
I will help you.
I went to one of these shows this year.
Shut the fuck up, Mars.
Of course, you know.
Yeah, Fred.
Yeah, Fred Again is my Fred Again, Dead Mouse, Jungle, John Summit.
That's fucking Dead Mouse.
Pretty good fucking list.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Shocking.
What are you fucking reliving like the glory days of college?
I went to three Dead Mouse shows this year.
I didn't even know he still did shows.
What?
He just released music.
Oh, I didn't know.
Fred Again Music List00:11:11
Okay.
But I mean, I don't know anything about music.
I don't even have it.
Yeah, that's crazy.
You don't have it.
Do you know Kim?
Do you know who Kim Petrus is?
Yeah.
You know who Kim Petrus is?
The name of Sympathy.
She has some songs.
Yeah.
Treat Me Like a Slut, Little Dirty Bitch.
She's like, Your list is so funny because it's both like the top artists of a homophobic man, like a deeply homophobic man, and the top artists are the gayest man alive.
Yeah, no, my, my.
Like, Chapel Rowan and Kim Petrus should never exist on the same list as Dean Martin.
This brings me to an interesting point.
This brings me to an interesting point.
What do you think of people trying to fix their Spotify rapped?
There are a lot of people that know Spotify rapped is coming up and they will start cleansing their Spotify by listening to artists that they think are cooler or something acceptable.
I mean, I think that's wrong.
Yeah, you got to know what it is.
That's why you own that.
Own that shit.
Listen to what you're going to listen to organically.
Quit trying to fix it.
You know what I mean?
It's lame.
It's so lame.
Lame as fuck.
Who cares what your Spotify rapt has on it?
Yeah.
What the fuck?
Sanja.
I can't really speak.
No, Yeah.
I just don't understand it.
Look.
No, I know.
There's more important listening to music.
Sometimes there's more important things in Syria getting invaded in the world, right?
I'm just saying that, like, well, even though.
Yes.
I are.
Yes.
Yes, I am Syrian.
I'm Lubanese Syrian.
For me, I'm saying, like, even if I did listen to music, like, am I more Middle Eastern than you?
Well, you're not even, he's European.
That's crazy.
Was that racist?
No, it's just crazy.
I'm just, I'm genuinely like, that was a genuine question.
You grew up fucking cornbread in Portland, Oregon.
Like, what do you mean?
I was the whitest state in the nation.
Excuse you.
I grew up in a very diverse area.
Okay.
I did.
Yes, he grew up with upper class, upper middle class Indian families.
It was.
Oregon is very like my area of Oregon is very diverse.
Okay.
Yeah.
A lot of compared to Anchorage.
It's literally the whitest state in the country.
It's one of the whitest states in the country.
You know what?
Come to think of it.
There was a white enclave.
There are a lot of white people.
I was at the airport.
You know what?
Yeah.
I was at the airport, and that's what I was like, God, there's a lot of fucking white people here.
Yeah.
It's crazy.
On the other hand, going back to me and Marge's travels to England, where I just basically brought Marge with me to do one day of streaming.
And I mean, it turned out pretty good.
We went to Cambridge Union, Oxford Union.
And yeah, I gave speeches on Israel, Palestine.
It's like very of the week.
These are some pretty significant institutions.
Like they've been around since like, you know, 1850.
Yeah.
Like, was it hard to find platform two and three quarters?
What?
Oh, it's a Hogwarts me.
Oh, my God.
Fucking.
That was the most basic white bitch shit you've ever seen.
I went over your head.
Yeah.
Because I would not have anticipated that from you.
That's why.
It's like an Austin joke.
Look.
Come on.
Damn.
Why did Austin catch daggers?
Come on.
He's on his phone right now.
Yeah, because the Vikings just fucking started.
Okay.
Hold on.
That's all right.
Which means.
You know what's crazy?
His team has already secured a playoff.
No, I know.
And he's still watching this religiously.
Look, I'm a fan.
I'm a fan.
We're a minute in.
All right.
Yeah, a lot of action.
Yeah.
A lot of action one minute in.
Yeah.
W the week, right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I would say that's a pretty pretty.
My dad, my dad called me.
He's like, yo, did Hassan speak at Oxford Union?
I said, yes.
He's like, I really want to watch that.
And my dad keeps saying this shit.
He's like, I really want to have a word with Hassan.
About what?
He just wants to talk to you, but he just wants to talk politics with you.
Wow.
That's funny.
Okay.
He's just like, I just really want to talk to that Hassan.
Yeah.
I like that.
Yeah.
And sometimes he'll try to like during the election.
He's like, you got to tell that Hassan.
What's what?
Yeah, no, I'll be like, dad, you know, I'll be like, yeah, Dodd, you can would you talk to my dad?
Sure.
Politics.
I'll bring him.
I'll bring him down one time.
I'll get him on the stream.
Don't talk to my father.
But yeah, Oxford, Oxford and Cambridge Union were fantastic.
You know, I peed in the same bathroom that both Ronald Reagan and Winston Churchill is pissed in.
So that was pretty badass.
I mean, it's wild.
Like the Oxford Union, especially was crazy.
The Cambridge one was very fun.
That was the first one we did.
It was a little bit smaller because they had like put this together last second because I said yes to Cambridge after I had said yes to Oxford Union for months in advance.
And there were some like weirdos in the crowd that did the classic like, you say you're a socialist, but you want a house.
And then like, but it was good to have that.
Yeah.
What did you say to that?
In broad daylight?
I was like, no, I mean, no, I mean, I think I'd say I do.
I was like, I had a pretty decent retort to that where it was like, I love that.
You were so excited when they said that.
Yeah, I was like, listen, man, you know, I advocate for, I advocate for black people's emancipation, trans people.
I'm not trans.
I'm not black.
Yeah, yeah.
I advocate for universal health care.
You know, I have health care.
It doesn't really, what do you want me to do?
Yeah, I have money.
Like, should I, should I just think you should live like Diogenes?
That is what they want.
No, that is.
They're like, no, you should stop showering and live, wear like a barrel.
But that is what they want.
So fire if you only streamed out of a barrel.
Yeah.
I can't even have streaming equipment.
That's too expensive.
But it was good to have that as well because online, when people make those comments, like you can't really tell how hysterical the person is behind the account.
But in broad daylight, like sunlight is the best disinfectant for that kind of stuff.
Yeah.
Because they just looked so insane.
Like there were people who brought up shit that I had said jokingly as though it was serious, where they're like, why would you want to kill all the landlords?
Like, I was like, dude, I don't want to kill all the landlords.
You need to chill out.
But outside of that, Oxford the next day was insane.
That was the first time I felt like fucking I show speed where they were mobbing the car.
Like they were literally so excited.
Damn, that would have been awesome to be at.
Yeah.
You would have loved it.
You would have loved it.
I would have fucking loved that shit.
Yeah, but they're not mobbing it for you.
I would have been in that bitch.
I'd be like, some of you might know me.
I would have been in that.
That is insane.
No, they were taking photos of Maria.
Yeah, I know.
I would have been in the, I would have been hanging out the sunroof like one of the Beatles.
I am not a crook.
Yeah.
You would have liked it for sure.
He just gets up on stage and fucking Oxford Union is like, I'm all about redistributing in the meeting.
Are you with me, Oxford?
He's like testing the crowd.
He's like, Israel, Palestine.
But one thing, one thing I've been doing.
Have you ever seen the movie Black Sheep?
Where he gets up there and he's like, kill Whitey.
One thing that was cool was the least singer of gorillas.
Oh, like, yeah, and blurred.
Apparently, he's like an Oxford Union alumni.
And did you see his face?
Or was he like, was he like about who he is?
He's a very famous person.
He's not like marshmallow.
Dude, I thought for the longest time the gorillas never showed their face.
And I was like, did he come as like an animatronic?
The gorillas are like a lot of their band members don't exist.
Yeah.
Like there's no noodle.
There's no Russell.
Oh, it's one guy.
It's like, it's like a few.
It's kind of like a little laugh.
I thought the gorillas were a band.
They are a band.
I thought, but they're like an avatar band.
I thought each avatar was an individual.
That's what people think, but there's like no noodle.
Like she exists.
She's like, yeah.
Or than one.
Come on.
Come on, stop his ass.
Anyway, my point was he, his daughter, his daughter is a huge Host and Hobbyhead, and he attended it.
And then the PR team for Oxford New York was like, oh, you got to meet this person.
You know, he's the lead singer of gorillas and bleh.
I would kill to go see him.
And I hung out with him a little bit.
He's super chill.
His daughter was dope.
Yeah.
And March didn't get to meet him.
No, that's good that Marsh didn't get to meet him because he didn't want to.
Doesn't deserve nice things.
Yes, he doesn't.
Thanks for the invite to England, by the way.
I would have loved to support you would not have loved to support me.
You would have loved to get secondhand.
That's not even.
That's not even a joke.
He would have liked it, though.
I would have loved it.
Ladies and gentlemen, that's it for this episode.
I desperately need to pee pee, so we're gonna jump off.
Thanks for joining us.
Thank you guys.
Uh, kissing Rolla, not on a plane right now feels bad man dead to me.
We have more content behind the paywall.
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Slash, fear and fuck Atlanta.
I got in the Uber, I took the shoes off, I took the socks off and I walked into my house shoeless.
Yeah, that's the first like a, like a drunk sorority girl.
Okay, after a shameful night.
That's like eating pork.
You were yeah, I walked, I hang my head in shame and I walked into my house.
You were.
Alla was not.
Yes, I ordered.
I ordered uh, Shake Shack.
Oh no, you ran the full Monte because I hadn't eaten enough food and I didn't eat anything at the after party.
So I was like i'm, i'm drunk.
We started drinking at like three.
Yeah, Will and I were just like slamming back grogs that were sent to me.
Yeah, we were grogging up.
We were a good time now yeah, we did.
We had a great time and we got a little.
We got a little drunk before we even oh yeah, y'all were Hasan was having a good time last night.
He was, I mean, you always have a good time.
Yeah, I was having a good time.
I mean, like i'm just guessing.
What i'm saying is, is Will's always having a great time.