Hasan Piker and guests dissect WillNeff's tragic accident rumors, menstrual hygiene myths debunked by Dr. Ramsey, and NFL kicker Harrison Butker's misogynistic commencement speech. They analyze gamer outrage over Assassin's Creed Japan's diverse cast—Yasuke and a female ninja—comparing it to Disney's casting choices to critique corporate capitalism rather than DEI efforts. Ultimately, the episode argues that communities flock to rudderless figures for validation while corporations exploit demographics for profit, urging listeners to direct anger at profit-seeking entities instead of character diversity. [Automatically generated summary]
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Tampons, Pads, and Peak Bodies00:14:56
Didn't get tampax.
Well, tampacs are tampons.
Oh, they don't have pads.
Are you a patter?
I don't know what I don't genuinely.
So, why did he want a pad?
I don't think he knew the words.
What's the so is there?
But he usually knows the words.
Are there two types of tampons?
See, there we go.
You don't okay.
I need to pause for a second.
I need to just, I need to just pause for a second.
Why is this a shock to you?
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to another episode of the Fear and podcast with most of your crew, minus Will, who has tragically died once more in a self-sucking incident, along with Marsh.
In fact, it was a double self-sucking situation.
It was a double self-sucker.
It was like a 69.
Yep.
69 situation.
I'll explain.
Yeah.
Okay.
Physically, a lot of people don't really understand how this works, right?
Like, you're like, oh, self-suck's supposed to be like self.
It's auto.
It's one person.
Well, what these guys who are genuinely champions in their own way, especially when it comes to self-suck, what these guys wanted to do is they're like, we've already achieved self-suck, right?
We've already done it a million times over.
We've died.
We've survived.
That's great.
What they wanted to do was, and pay attention to my hands here.
What they wanted to do was basically self-suck on the one hand and then self-suck on the other hand and then get together and self-suck in like an infinity type situation like this.
So they wanted to loop in between one another while self-sucking.
They're not tall.
It's like a self-suck centipede.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They're a loop.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's a really devastating.
It's horrific.
It's really devastating stuff, honestly.
Cutie found them.
Well, the cool, the crazy thing you guys don't know is they actually accomplished it, but they were doing it on a bunk bed and the top bunk smushed them.
It fell.
Oh my god.
It was one of those rare top because you walked in scenarios.
Yeah, I walked in.
Cutie's the one that discussed.
Okay, I have to ask this question.
I have to ask this question out of respect for the victims here.
Did they nut?
Did you check?
I didn't check.
You had that.
This is the second time.
Gosh damn it.
That's crazy that this is literally the second time we've had this conversation.
This is why we need men in medicine.
Yeah, menu.
Wasn't it you who told me the story with a guy who told us the story?
Oh, yeah, that's right.
And the EMT did a firefighter.
Did the empty check?
Yeah.
No, they didn't.
You gotta check their own tour.
You have to check to see if they accomplished it because I feel like I feel like there.
I have two questions here.
One, if you nut, like, I feel like that's an honorable death.
Like, you have done, you have like the samurai death.
Yeah, exactly.
You've completed the Bushuto code.
Like, you literally did it.
Bushuto is gay as hell, anyways.
Uh, regardless.
Bushuto.
Yeah, like the samurai, like the bread of the samurai.
Oh, never mind.
That's prosheta.
So uncultured.
Sorry, he's quite white.
Okay.
What?
Are you kidding me?
Italians culture.
That was the whitest thing you could have said.
Italians are exotic.
I brought you guys treats.
Thank you so much, Cutie.
Disgusting.
Get that out of here.
That's phenomenal.
What did you bring us?
They're called Scotcharoos.
Scotcharoos.
Is there caramel in them?
No.
Wasn't it?
Explain it.
Peanut butter.
Love that.
Rice Krispies.
Beautiful.
Chocolate.
Natural.
Butterscotch.
Oh, wow.
And you made those just specifically for us.
Yes.
That's so sweet of you.
Not to pull a will nev here.
Sorry to cut you off.
Not to pull a will nev here and and suck my own dick.
And I don't mean like in a self-suck kind of way, but like I've been looking kind of shredded lately.
So you're just really trying to not destroy my peak physical body, dude.
Can I say something?
I'm fucking, I'm built like a Donnis right now.
That's what I'm feeling.
Cutie, I have been looking at Hassan from afar for a while now, and you have hit a point in your, I don't know what happened, but there was like a switch that flipped and you look so good.
Like you look hot.
Thank you.
No, like I've been, I've been like watching your stories.
I've been seeing you come up on Twitter and there's like, I don't know what it is, but there's like a point in somebody's like journey of like reaching their peak level of attraction that it just, it just like hits like like crescendo.
And you have apex point.
You have hit your apex point.
You have hit your crescendo.
You look shredded.
The beard looks good.
You've got the perfect amount of gray.
Your chest hair.
It's perfect.
The body hair is doing stuff for people.
It's time to get in the tub.
Oh, that's why you were dancing me up.
Yeah, I was like, where am I?
I was like, I was not sure.
No, no, no, but no, but genuinely, when you're ready to get in the tub, it'll be ready for you.
Look, I'm working out for you in many ways.
I'm working out for myself.
I'm trying to get a six-pack again by my birthday, like by the summer.
Okay.
So I can have a slut boy summer.
Yeah.
Slut boy summer.
And finally put an end to all the fat shaming that Austin does to me, like behind the camera and also in front of the camera.
It's like pretty emotional.
Did it work?
I'm just, it just, it doesn't work, Austin.
It doesn't work.
No, for you.
The fat shaming?
Yeah.
No.
Fat people know they're fat, bro.
It doesn't work that way.
They're not chat.
Don't call them audio chat.
I don't actually fat shame.
And he does.
He calls me the elephant of the room all the time.
But that's besides the point.
But no, I've been on my fitness journey and there's like pivot.
There's like turning points where you feel like you've, at least for me, you feel like you reach a certain milestone and then you're like comfortable there and then you move to the next milestone.
And I am in my 230s era right now.
I'm trying to get down all the way to 225 and I am currently 200 as of this morning 238 pounds.
I also want to train for basketball.
No, you guys don't have to clap for me.
It's lame.
I want to start basketball training.
Why?
You need a coach?
I'll coach you.
What are you going to do?
Join the NBA?
I realize like I'm Kyle Corver in this shit.
Yeah.
I realize I'm rich.
Like, why don't I do that?
That's like rich cars.
You are rich.
Yeah.
Thank you so much.
We're going to get canceled now.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They're going to be like, what?
Hasan is rich?
That's crazy.
You mean as a basketball coach, you're going to get good?
Well, I think I'm already pretty decent because of my body.
Like I'm a very big guy.
I'm tall.
So like it's and also I can like dribble with my left hand, look at the court while I'm dribbling.
Like these are things that the average person can't do.
So it's like, I have this.
So hold on.
So you think you're like going to go to the NBA basically?
No, he just wants to have fun.
Like I take voice lessons.
That's so funny.
Why are you laughing?
You're really, I think it's great.
That's rich.
It's because I'm rich.
Wait, well, hold on.
I go to my voice lessons and she sits there and she's like, you're so rich.
And that's all we talk about is how rich I am.
Wait, I don't have any of those things.
Because you're poor.
No, he's not.
He's definitely.
No, it's not that.
It's just that you.
I need something like this.
You know what I'm going to do?
Get a hobby.
I'm going to take flight lessons.
Oh, my God.
That's fine.
That's okay.
Is that some rich personal behavior?
That's richer than my, my voice lessons cost 40 bucks an hour.
Well, I have a personal channel.
I wasn't going to actually pay for like the basketball training.
I was going to get like an influencer coach to like content.
To make content.
My brother's a high school basketball coach.
He could help you.
Absolutely not.
Why?
Because I don't want that.
I want like a very specific type of person that like will do one-on-one.
Yeah.
Like I'm not, I'm not trying to get a lot of people.
We can go to high school practice unless you think that.
I am not Drake.
I will not be going near a high school.
I will not be going to the high school basketball practice.
He's so awkward.
Yeah.
Why is he here?
I mean, it'd be cool for like one day if I was like attending and then the kids were like, oh my God, like that's sick.
Yeah, but like beyond that, I'm not doing that.
This morning I was playing basketball.
That's why I'm late to my own house, to my own podcast in my own house.
And I apologize for that, guys.
Yeah, we were all on time.
No, you weren't.
Of course.
You were on time.
I was not on time.
Cheating, of course, was literally not on time.
You guys want to know what really happened?
What happened?
I lied to you guys.
You lied to us.
I said my car is not here.
It was there.
I lied.
What happened was I woke up in the morning not feeling like P2D because I didn't feel like beating my girlfriend.
But I woke up in the morning feeling like myself, which is usually depressed.
And tired.
And tired.
And I was like, why am I so depressed and tired?
Go to the freaking bathroom, freaking bleeding out of my vagina.
I'm like, God damn it.
Not today.
You can't tell when you're about to be on your period.
No, sometimes you can't.
Is that how it happens?
It's crazy.
It's like a sudden rush.
My friend Taylor's in town.
And Swift.
Yeah.
No, my friend, she's my assistant.
And I think people say sinking's a myth.
And you guys aren't going to have any input on this, but it's fucking real.
Why would that be a myth?
I don't know.
It just is.
Are you hungry?
Do you know what?
Do you know what she's referencing when she says?
Am I hungry?
Cause I'm on my period.
Do you know what?
Do you know what she's referencing when she says sinking awesome?
No, no, no.
I mean, are you?
I don't know why that came out of my mouth.
I meant like, are you like, what sort of things do you feel at this moment?
I'm sorry.
Like killing myself.
What the fuck is wrong with you?
I shouldn't.
There's certain things, some thoughts just stay in my head.
I'm fine.
I'm normal.
I just, this is what happened.
I couldn't find any fucking tampons.
I'm looking all over the house.
I can't find my.
No, I don't want your tampons.
You have tampons?
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
Okay.
It's not like I'm using them.
What the fuck do you mean?
It's like, I'm accommodating.
I'm an accommodating person.
Wait, should I carry tampons?
I carry them like you're the supermarket.
I mean, do you have, do you have like sometimes women staying over?
And by that, I mean, like, literally family members, friends, friends, girlfriends, things of that.
I mean, women do come into my house every once in a while and stay.
Like, not with me, but like, I have relatives that are women and they stay.
That's what I mean.
And there you go.
And that's why I have it.
I don't have periods.
People will think like.
I haven't asked them, though.
People will think I'll be like, oh, I have tampons.
Is that something you asked?
That's not.
No, well, I've told this story before, but on Chad Vice or whatever, one time five years ago, Hassan was like, Yeah, like you should have tampons at your house.
It was my vlog, like my early vlog.
Is that what it was?
I was just showing my house and I showed my medicine cabinet and I had tampons in there.
I had like a makeup remover.
Yeah, he was like, always be ready for the ladies.
And then I shit, you know what?
Fast forward like a few years, I hear Ludwig on his stream verbatim what Hassan said.
I was like, you don't have swag like that.
You don't even like, you don't even have tampons.
Like, what the fuck?
It's crazy.
And he's like, giving that advice.
It's so funny.
But it genuinely asked me.
That's classic Ludwig just, you know, copying my script.
He's a yoink and twister, but he does it the best.
I'm going to carry tampons now at my house.
I just, like, it doesn't have to be something that is like sinister or sexual at all, by the way.
It's just like being accommodating, even though sometimes when you're.
What?
Nobody thought that was a sexual story.
No, no, like, I know what people that are going to do.
I get laid, so I got tampons.
Yeah, I know that's what people are going to close that.
Guys, grandma.
Tampons too.
Yeah, exactly.
It's true.
And you're not always slanging grandma pussy.
I mean, speak for yourself.
Speak for yourself.
I got moms, Chad's mom, Chad's grandma, all of it locked down.
You just never know, but I couldn't find any.
And I'm like, great.
Well, I'm just going to, I'm just going to die here, I guess.
And then Ludwig was like, do you want me to run to the store?
And I was like, no, I'm going to walk around the house mad trying to find one for a while.
Then he's like, I'll run to the store.
And then he ran to the store.
The Uber eats it.
No, he ran.
I saw him leave the house.
That's weird.
He's waiting in his Crocs and shorts.
That's so funny.
He ran.
He got there.
He came back.
He did.
I will expose him a little bit.
He did call me and he goes, they don't have Tampax pads.
And I said, what?
I was like, what?
He didn't say what size pussy, my queen.
He said.
You don't have, they don't have tampax pads.
And I was like, what are you talking about?
And he's like, the brand, Tampax Pads.
And I was like, didn't get away with that.
Tampax.
Well, Tampax are tampons.
Oh.
They don't have pads.
Your ear patter?
I don't know what they're doing.
No, I wanted a tampon.
I don't genuinely think.
So why did he want a pad?
I don't think he knew the words.
What's the ditto for?
But he usually he knows the words.
Are there two types of tampons?
See, there we go.
You don't.
Okay.
I need to pause for a second.
Hold on.
I need to just, I need to just pause for a second.
Why is this a shock to you?
It's not just about thinking about I'm not just frolicking around a pussy.
Like, I don't know.
Bro, you have.
But like, but like, okay, I am just the point.
See, you're a pussy.
Are you on your period?
You don't have to use tampons or tampax.
It's not like.
I don't have.
My sister is 10 years older than me.
I don't know.
That's okay.
My mom, my mom, she had a hysterectomy.
She doesn't even have periods.
You're going about this wrong.
I was grown.
I was raised in a household without periods.
Do it without judgment.
No, the thing I, okay, that's going to be very difficult for me.
There's pads.
Yeah.
There's multiple different ways that women, when they are having their beautiful and natural moment once a month.
Yeah, there's pads and then there's the thing that you stick up there.
There's pads.
There's tampons.
And there's also a cup.
Oh, well.
And there's liners.
What?
And there's the undies.
Oh, then there's an undies.
There's these cool undies.
I haven't tried them, but apparently you can just wear these underwear.
That's true.
And you bleed in them and you just wash them in the washing machine and then you redo them.
That's crazy.
Okay, do you want to hear something insane?
That's awesome that I just found out that I didn't even know and that women apparently don't know either, but I don't even know if this is real or not.
You have to tell me.
Okay.
I might not know.
I'm happy.
Even if you don't wear a tampon when you're going in the pool, you don't bleed when you're in the water.
No, that's a fucking lie.
That's crazy.
Is that a lie?
Yeah, that's a lie.
Okay, motherfucker, you can't.
You can't tell me the things and then say the things that you just said.
Okay, this is extra level shit, though.
This is like, this is extra credit shit.
What do you mean, extra credit shit?
Who told you that?
You're believing.
You're in.
I'm asking you.
You're in menstrual.
Let me...
I need to go grab something.
We're going to do it.
Conspiracy theories.
I'll be back.
Are you grabbing?
We're doing a science experience.
Okay, we're doing a wait.
Are you going to bleed on the podcast?
Oh.
Just want to make sure.
Where is she going?
Oh, my God.
Wait.
Are we good?
Bleeding Underwater Science Experiment00:04:06
You won't leave a bloody trail in the water.
Oh, my God.
Hassan.
This is ridiculous.
Does your period stop in the water or does it just feel like...
I can't believe we're talking about it.
A Cosmopolitan article.
Can you pull this up, please?
Google Cosmopolitan.
Oh, my God.
I'm so sorry, Gabe.
By the way, Gabe's our producer today.
Marsh is.
Oh, yeah.
We said he's dead.
Yeah.
Pull it up.
Cosmopolitan period swimming.
Your body is still releasing menstrual blood while you are underwater.
However, the pressure while your body is underwater, aka buoyancy, slows the flow.
Oh, my God.
She's like, she's pouring out a science experiment.
Oh, my God.
The consistency of you guys is not going to be the same as water, though.
Don't put me at the bottom.
Okay, are you?
I already pulled up like factually accurate information.
You still flow.
Look.
But you will not leave a blood.
Yeah, of course you won't leave a blood trail.
Hold on, Cutie, before you move forward, what's the water in this situation?
This is the swimming pool or whatever.
Great.
Now, what's the Gatorade?
This is the period blood.
It's not the same consistency.
It's coming out of your pussy.
It's different.
It matters.
No, there's like no actually.
Actually, I think Gatorade is pretty close to the consistency.
If the pool is this big, the free bleeder bleeds that much.
You have no fucking clue.
You never see it.
Oh, okay.
That's what you were showing.
Okay, that's what I was going to say.
So, yeah, they're just bleeding in the pool.
Even if they.
Oh my God, that's amazing.
I can't even see it.
Yeah, no shit.
I literally thought the water was going to turn orange.
It's more the reason not to go to public pools.
You never know.
Yeah.
Okay.
Dr. Ramsey, Dr. Ramsey.
Is this what happens when you pee in a pool?
Dr. Ramsey addresses two myths at this awesome cosmopolitan article.
Okay.
That your period attracts sharks and that your period magically stops underwater.
Don't even listen to the shark ting, even if you are swimming in the ocean and note that your period doesn't fully stop in the water.
Even if it feels that way, your body is still releasing menstrual blood while you're underwater.
However, the pressure while your body is underwater, aka buoyancy, slows the flow, explains Dr. Ramsey.
So you're not going to bleed as much while you're taking a dip.
But if you're on a heavy flow day or have a heavier period in general, you could end up with some leakage out of your swimsuit.
Wow.
Okay.
I think we've cracked the code.
That was my answer: is you still bleed.
Okay.
I just a little slow.
I was asking a question and we also researched it.
Everybody at home.
The answer.
Everybody at home that was anxiously awaiting the answer to that.
Even if you use a tampon, you still are bleeding in the pool.
Because the tampon, what happens is it has a little stream.
I don't think we're debating that.
I think we're debating whether how much it to which you're flowing.
You're not going to have a blood trail in your water.
No, but no matter what, if you go swimming on your period, you're bleeding.
So we all agree.
Yes.
Okay.
Never mind.
This doctor also says you can free bleed, which I think is kind of gross.
Yeah.
My son, we're not going to make it through this podcast.
We're all going to, our careers are over.
What?
No.
You misogynist.
What are you?
You pig.
I think the water is different.
I think they should be able to bleed everywhere.
I thought it was gross when Kaya was free bleeding.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah, it was.
It was gross.
Yeah.
Yeah, it was pretty nasty.
Well, I think it's natural.
So you liked it when Kai was free bleeding?
No, I didn't enjoy it, but I just thought that, wow, she's having such a human experience.
I mean, she's just a dog experience, like a feminine experience.
She's having a mammal experience.
A feminine experience?
She's having a, yeah.
I prefer.
Well, I prefer tampons.
And then you got it.
Sometimes if it's a crazy day, you got to use a pad as a backup.
Damn.
Or liners.
Well, usually, so with tampons, if they get full, it always comes out the bottom.
And so you need a liner at least.
Usually you can't just do tampons unless it's a smaller day.
You got heavy flow queen?
Yeah, I'm a heavy flow queen.
You guys just vampires love me.
Yeah, what size pussy, my queen?
Jumbo.
Free Bleeding vs Patriarchy00:03:43
Wait, is that a thing?
Are there different sizes of pussies?
No, there's different sizes of tampons.
And like you have to get wait, is it based on the size of your pussy?
No, it's based on the amount you bleed.
Yeah.
Which, like, sometimes you'll have a period and you'll barely bleed, but sometimes you'll like be dying.
Wait, I thought that there was.
You know what's crazy?
Is when you're on your period, if you sit like your legs crossed, like you're sitting at a movie and your legs are crossed or somewhere, when you stand up, it all comes out of you.
Oh my God.
Wow.
And it's like, and you stand there for a second.
You're like, oh, my God.
I think I could have survived hemorrhaging.
That's oh my God.
I'm so sorry.
Dude, yeah, imagine bleeding out of your dick for like a week.
I can't even imagine.
You guys would like make it cool somehow, though.
Whatever boys do shit is cool.
No.
Yeah.
You guys are funny jokes about cum cheese, and I can't.
Literally internalized misogyny.
I don't make those jokes.
He's a byproduct of patriarchal structures.
You know what isn't a joke?
You know what isn't a joke?
What isn't a joke?
What?
The fact that women are under siege.
For what?
Women are under siege.
Women are under attack unlike any time in history.
Specifically.
You segueing, Your Honor?
Specifically by NFL football players, specifically by NFL kickers, specifically by Harrison Butker.
Look at that transition.
Are you kidding me?
Who is this guy?
You know?
He's the kicker for your team.
What do you mean?
He's the kicker for the Kansas City Chiefs.
And he, the Kansas City Chiefs kicker, Harrison Butker, went on a absolutely misogynistic, homophobic, anti-Semitic.
You mean God-loving?
God-loving.
And God-fearing, right?
God-fearing rant at a commencement speech at Benedictine College.
Benedictine College, which is a Catholic university.
And I think we have a clip from him.
Before we get into this, he's a born-again Catholic.
Wait, really?
He's a Catholic revert, which means he is going to be a fucking psychopath.
Wait, so he was invited to give like the speech or whatever?
Do they not read these beforehand?
No, no, they did it on purpose.
It's a Catholic school.
It's a Catholic school.
Your commencement speaker oftentimes is like obviously a very political decision and it's done by the university.
Like they know exactly what he's going to say, or at least like the they know usually what like what he is probably going to bring up.
They brought him up for this political purpose.
I knew nothing about this besides I obviously he says my my co-worker's girlfriend in reference to Taylor Swift, which is just weird.
But that's the only thing I know.
Okay, let's play this little snippet.
I'm a lay person.
For the ladies present today, congratulations on an amazing accomplishment.
Thank you.
You should be proud of all that you have achieved to this point in your year.
Now get back to the kitchen.
Because I think the women who have had the most diabolical lies told to you.
How many of you are sitting here now, about to cross this stage, and are thinking about all the promotions and titles you are going to get in your career?
Kitchen Lies and Emotional Manipulation00:15:47
Me.
Some of you may go on to lead successful careers in the world, but I would venture to guess that the majority of you are most excited about your marriage and the children you will bring into this world.
I can tell you that my beautiful wife Isabel would be the first to say that her life truly started when she began living her vocation as a wife and as a mother.
Her vocation.
I'm on this stage today and able to be the man I am because I have a wife who leans into her vocation.
Oh my God.
Oh my God.
God has given me.
But it cannot be overstated that all of my success is made possible because a girl I met in band class back in high school.
Pause.
I've heard makes it all about himself.
No, no, no.
You want more?
No, I mean, we'll get back to it because there's a lot that I want to say here.
But let's start with cutie because we respect women.
Yeah, we respect women.
I mean, you get the voice.
Benedictine knowledge.
Yeah.
How do you feel about that?
So funny.
I think it's funny.
I think it's fine if you want to be a stay-at-home mom.
I think sometimes I sit and I think about it.
I'm like, man, I should just quit everything and do arts and crafts all day and let Ludwig give me money.
I think about it sometimes.
You should do that.
I'm just so tired.
And it seems appealing.
Yeah, it seems appealing.
And it's crazy.
You know what's crazy?
It is crazy to like have an that option.
What a weird world we live in.
That that's like a normal, like like I don't.
It feels so like apocalyptic to me for some reason, even though I was like raised that way.
I was raised in a household where that was very normal to the the extent of like my sister and I have like had conversations and she talks sometimes like Ariel, like in the Little Mermaid.
Like she's like wow, I wish I had a job, like i'm so bored, like you know, but then she's like no, I love my kids, she could.
She just there's no way she's got five kids.
Yeah, like she, but she wants to see part of that world.
Like she just like kind of misses having co-workers and like she's only ever had the only job she ever had was like working at a cafe in high school, you know, and then she got married and that was it, and you know, and uh, it's just, it's just so.
It's so crazy to me because I haven't lived that life well ever.
What's even crazier kitty, is that this guy was raised by a working mother who was a like a physicist.
Oh, I mean clearly like a scientist and a physicist.
I have it right here, Elizabeth Elizabeth Butker, by the way, Butker is such a funny last name.
Um anyway, Kansas CITY chiefs kicker Harrison Butker thinks one of the most important titles a woman can hold is homemaker, even though his own mother, Elizabeth Killer Butker, has spent the last three decades working as an accomplished medical physicist.
So this guy, literally raised by like a powerful woman who you know was, was being a girl boss, doing her own shit, doing physicist stuff right yeah, saving lives meanwhile, raised him to be who he is, raised him and then you know, sometimes maybe uh maybe, maybe Harrison is right, maybe she wasn't at home too much and that's why you have a shitty son.
Yeah, I mean it does, it does sound it sounds nice to be a man, sometimes like it sounds nice that the idea I mean it definitely of having like a home, of all the joy being a man, is definitely one of the best.
It's the, it's literally the top of the leader.
It's it's like I wouldn't, I wouldn't trade it for the world.
It seems really cool and it's weird because it's like kind of normal, like okay, Ludwig is great, for the record, he's really good at like this stuff, like balancing, but it's like it's even just, I mean it takes time to get there, but it's like things like I can do, like i'm just used to taking, okay, here's a perfect line.
Okay Ludwig, no man i've ever been with has ever apologized when someone comes to the house.
So sorry, it's so messy.
I do that all the time, of course.
Yeah, so you're just saying Ludwig's gay no no no no, i'm saying he doesn't apologize, he's not gay.
Okay wait, he doesn't apologize.
No, he doesn't.
He doesn't say, oh, i'm so sorry, it's messy.
Oh, because a lot of the time, the person that takes the ownership of the mess or the chaos or whatever, Is the woman.
And that's wait.
So, hold on, hold on.
Let me get this straight.
If your house is messy, somebody comes over, Ludwig doesn't apologize for the house being messy.
No.
And most, I've talked to like a lot of girls about this, and a lot of girls say their boyfriend, their husband, whatever, never says this.
Okay, interesting.
But it's always the girl that takes the accountability of what the house looks like.
Oh, so sorry, it's a mess.
Okay, interesting.
So sorry.
So he's a misogynist.
No.
I just think his brain doesn't think that way.
And that's what's weird to me is that, like, I don't know.
Do you ever say that?
No.
Because he's a misogynist.
I think his brain doesn't think that way.
I always apologize for my house.
No, I just don't give a shit because one, my house is rarely ever messy.
And two, sorry, I'm like fixing my hair because I just got out of the shower and I took my hat off and it looks terrible.
Drama.
Just keep your hat on.
No, I don't want to keep it on.
My hair is wet and I want to dry it to let it dry out.
Yeah, I just, I, the reason why my house is messy is because of Austin.
So when people come over, that's right.
When people come over, I'm like, when people come over, I'm just like, I'm sorry.
I let a homosexual in here and he just tore it up.
He tore it the fuck up.
We'll be the protein shake finally.
Are you staying here tonight?
No, no, not tonight.
But I'm not staying here tonight because I have a hotel room.
However, next week I will be here and the week after.
Nice.
I just want to make a reservation.
Anyway, as we were saying, you're not allowed.
Okay.
It is interesting how that is.
I mean, it just, it just like blows my mind.
Like, it's just so, it's so weird.
Or like, I've had, I've had a boyfriend in the past where it's like, I'll do all the laundry, right?
I'll do my laundry.
I'll do his laundry.
I'll put it all away, blah, blah, blah.
And then, like, I had a boyfriend in the past, she does laundry and he washes mine, but then he just leaves it in a pile.
And I don't know how to fold yours.
Oh, fucking figure it out.
Like, if you know how to drive a car, you know how to fold Lululemons.
Isn't there one way to fold it?
Like, I don't get it.
Yeah, but I think it's just a lot of women have a lot of tank tops.
Yeah.
And panties, and they're hard to fold.
Don't make excuses.
If you can drive a car, you can try to make excuses.
I got a really good solution to this problem.
What?
Have your mommy, who is an accomplished doctor who just got her doctorate.
That's why I was away for this past week.
Stay with you and do your laundry.
My mom's dead.
She can't do my laundry.
True.
Sorry.
That's an L. God damn it.
It is an L for me.
Did she do your laundry when she was alive?
Sometimes it was really nice.
Actually, you know what's crazy?
This is sad.
This is not.
It's fine.
It's just crazy.
My brain went here.
The day she died, she texted me.
She's like, bring some laundry out.
I'll do it.
Oh, that's really fuck, dude.
Damn it.
Yeah, and it was Mother's Day and her birthday last week.
So thanks, guys, for bringing it.
Thanks for being, don't touch me.
Happy birthday.
You have so many issues.
Like, this is normal friend.
Like, this is supposed to be comforting.
This is supposed to be me trying to comfort you as your friend.
And you have an immediate.
Like, I knew when I was going for it, I was like, she's probably going to react to this negatively.
She always does.
I try to touch her all the time.
She touches me all the time.
I never do.
Maybe I don't try to touch you.
That sounds kind of weird, but like, I don't put my hand on you sometimes.
I don't.
Yeah, we're not touchy.
I'm not a touchy.
I'm not a hugger.
I'm a hugger.
I like the hug.
Hassan's a terrible hugger.
I try to give him hugs and it's like hugging like a brick wall.
I just, I'm not like.
He doesn't know how to squeeze.
I'm not about that lifestyle.
Come on, give me a big hug right now.
No.
Okay.
Behind the paywall on the Patreon.
Okay, behind the paywall, you're going to give me a big fucking hug.
I want you to be a good ass and hug you up.
Hug me up.
I just, I don't know.
I'm like, he, you know what?
You're, it's toxic masculinity.
Yeah.
He doesn't want to be seen as gay.
Yeah, exactly.
Hugging you right now.
My dad also gives terrible hugs.
I'm a real good hugger, though.
You know that, right?
Hello, Fearan viewers.
I'm sure you're watching a broadcast right now and it's fantastic, right, Cutie?
It was probably super cringe, and you were like, oh, they're talking about that again.
Well, regardless, there's something that's much less cringe, and it's the Austin Show Colin Advice show that is on our Patreon right now with Cutie and myself.
So go subscribe.
Good advice.
She gave such good advice.
It was amazing.
And we got naked.
Did we get naked?
Yeah.
That's right.
We both showed our boobs.
Come see us on the Patreon, Fear and Patreon.
Now, back to your regularly scheduled programming.
You know what's crazy?
My Pilates teacher at the end of class, she's always like, have a good weekend.
Love you.
And I can't say it back.
I always go, thank you.
Yeah.
It's we need to talk about this.
There are people in this world that use I love you a little too soon.
Thank you liberally.
I think she loves me.
No, but I don't know.
It's it makes me there's some people that have said I love you to me and it makes me uncomfortable.
Really?
Yeah.
She's like a hippie though.
So she like loves me.
No, I don't fuck with that.
If I said I love you, would you say it back to me?
Let's move on to the next topic.
Harrison Butker.
Okay, let's go back to the commencement.
Okay, he was also.
No, I'm fucking with you.
Yes, I would.
So he also, Harrison Butker in his speech.
I was waiting if you want to address the thing.
Yes, I would.
I was just joking.
I was just joking.
I would never say it to begin with.
I'm just joking.
You're sick, man.
I would say it if I did something wrong and I had to apologize.
I'd be like, I'm so sorry.
I love you.
Emotionally manipulated.
I would say, I'm late again.
I'm so, I love you guys so much.
Thank you for always putting up.
You've wronged me in the past and you never said I love you.
Do you love me?
That bad?
No.
Do you?
Do you love me?
No.
Oh, my God.
I don't love anybody.
I love my dog.
Do you love Ludwig?
Yeah.
Why did you say that?
Like, it's a bad.
Because now I'm vulnerable.
The enemies know who to take out to destroy me.
They know you're.
No, I would be sad if you guys died.
I'd be sad at your funerals.
Does that mean I love you?
You don't have to love someone to be sad that they're not.
That's a human emotion.
You'd be sad at our funerals because you'd be depressed at the idea that you could die of that same ailment.
I'd be like, damn.
I was in the same room as him.
Is it contagious?
Yeah, literally.
No, I'm just kidding.
I'd be sad.
I'd be really sad.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's that's normal.
That's normal human emotion.
That doesn't mean you love us.
Why don't you love us?
Love.
Wow.
What does that even mean?
I don't know.
That's a good question.
I think I've never told Maya I love her.
Do you love Maya?
My God.
I don't know.
Yeah, I think I love her.
I hate this.
Okay, I love you guys.
No, you don't.
You're a fucking liar.
I'm thinking, I'm being honest and von.
You're a liar.
I think I like you guys.
Do you love your father?
I think I love you guys.
I love my dad.
You love Joseph Smith.
I love Joseph Smith.
Do you love Taylor Swift?
I don't know her, so I love her music.
Okay.
Great.
You fucking love her.
You do.
I like her music.
You've named your dog after her.
You love her.
Have you ever been, has anybody, besides your Pilates teacher, has anybody ever said I love you in like a relationship of some sort that hasn't gotten to that point and you didn't say it back?
Well, my sister always gets off the phone with me and she says, bye, love you.
And I say, bye.
And I hang up.
Wait, I say I love you too.
I love her, but I don't want to like say it.
I say it to my, I say love you to my mom, my dad, my aunt, my uncle.
Sometimes my best friend every once in a while.
I was like, when I hang up the phone, my fam, my house, like, we didn't like make each other hug.
We didn't like hug each other.
We didn't hug our cousins.
We didn't like you.
We didn't like it.
I think it's a problem.
Is that why you don't like to be like?
No, I do that on the podcast because I think it's funny.
Okay.
Gotcha.
I don't actually.
There's a lot of things I do on this podcast that I think are funny.
Yeah.
Like be a fucking raging lunatic.
You're always that way.
Oh.
Yeah, but I don't know.
I mean, what is love after all?
I love you guys.
I could call you guys if I was crying.
I literally just in the process of this conversation DM'd Matty Healy.
Good luck.
No, no, not like a good luck.
We've been talking.
And that would be insane to have Matty Healy on the pod.
I'm going to, I'm going to befriend the Mao.
I'm going to further befriend Maddie Healy.
I bet he would say he loves me.
He did say the word love.
Much love.
That's fine.
I don't.
You talked about having Matty Healy on the podcast.
And he said, let's hang, man.
I'd love that.
That's fine.
I don't know if he loves you.
I don't care.
A word that is only used by you.
He loves you.
To emotionally manipulate people when you are doing something heinous.
That's so true about me.
Wow.
That's true.
If I ever kill a bunch of people, I'll be like, sorry, guys.
I loved you.
That's why I killed you.
That would only make it sound more insane.
I don't think that would be helpful.
I loved you so much.
I had to send you to heaven.
I had to put a bomb in this preschool.
Yeah.
I just love children so much.
Cutie, we're already on a watch list because of this motherfucker.
Okay.
We're just going to add us to the watchline.
This was a joke.
It's fine.
The federal government.
So I'm a said worse.
I can say that's true.
I don't know if he's ever bought it.
You're a woman.
Cutie.
It's different.
True.
I would never, guys.
I'm too tired to do that.
I know.
She's too tired to commit an act of terror.
Okay.
Sorry.
So what?
Okay.
So women need to stay at home.
Got it.
Noted.
Harrison Butker.
I also feel bad.
Don't feel.
Are you going to have a complex about what?
The love thing.
Oh, my God.
I would choose.
I choose to not answer this question because I love you guys.
Oh my God.
We love you too.
The dynamic has shifted.
I'm hurt.
The dynamic of this podcast has shifted dramatically.
You guys feel that tension in the air?
Yeah, it's bad.
It's super bad.
So it's okay.
Harrison Butker.
He also hates gay people.
He said this.
He said, which is weird because I'm pretty sure he's gay.
Yeah.
So that's the funniest part.
Is Harrison Butker?
There's allegations out there that he, number one, fucked a cheerleader in high school or college.
Male cheerleader.
Male cheerleader in college.
And then also went to conversion therapy.
So I need to.
So not only was his mom a physicist raised by a mom that wasn't into your traditional role as a mother.
And second, was gay, evidently, or had to go to conversion therapy.
What?
Yeah.
That's what people say.
How do we know he went to conversion therapy?com entertainment.
Bombshell accusation claims Harrison Butker hooked up with male cheerleader in college.
Following the controversy surrounding Harrison Butker's graduation speech on gender roles and bad leadership, the NFL star is being accused of hooking up with a male cheerleader while he was in college.
Butker Jerseys and Conversion Therapy00:07:01
His previously reported about the blast.
An esteemed outlet.
A Pulitzer Prize.
I'm just going to say it's true because he's a piece of shit.
Wait.
Okay.
Part of his speech took aim at the LGBTQ community as he called their pride deadly sins.
That's what he said.
When addressing the graduating class, Bucker brought up the AP and their attempt to rebuke and embarrass places and people like those here at Benedict Tyne, which was not met with anger, but instead it was met with excitement and pride.
Yeah.
And not the deadly sin sort of pride that is an entire month dedicated to it, but the true God-centered pride that is cooperating with the Holy Ghost to glorify him.
Hallelujah.
The NFL kicker at it.
He didn't say Hallelujah.
I added that part.
However, however, one TikToker stitched that clip dropping a bombshell accusation that the football star hooked up with a male cheerleader during his college.
Where's the TikTok?
We should find the TikTok.
The video received over 514,000 likes and nearly 9,000 comments.
How do we know about the conversion therapy?
That's another thing that I heard.
That's why I'm like, Austin, say you hooked up with him.
Yeah, I fucked him.
Yes.
He's hot.
I fucked Harrison.
Would you fuck Harrison Bunker?
Because he's hella zesty.
Like, I will say that.
He's zesty as fuck.
Like, if you see, you know, like NFL tries to do NBSI, like, tunnel pics, like, they get flicked up with their fits.
And like, he dresses in a way, like, it's funny to say that he dresses gay because, like, obviously, every single because, like, every single NBA guy, like, everyone dresses, tries to dress as gay as possible, obviously.
But, like, he dresses like a like a Midwestern gay who got money for the first time.
You know what I mean?
Like, he's, I don't know.
He's just, he's just hella zesty with it.
Like, I've seen the, I've seen the photos of him kicking the ball, and he's just, you know, it's like, I think, yeah, because everybody, everybody's been, everybody saw his outfits.
A lot of people thought he was gay before he had this speech, right?
Yeah.
Based on the way he dressed.
Yeah, he's, he's got a little, he's got a little zest to him.
He's got a little middle American zest to him.
And you'd fuck him.
I, you know what?
The beard is a little.
Maybe we could shave his face a little bit.
You want him to look extra twink-like.
Just a little bit more.
But like, I think it's well put together.
Conversion therapy doesn't work.
Huh?
So he'd just still be gay.
That's what you think.
That's well, I mean, evidently.
Unless it did work.
It just turns you into a misogynist.
That's so crazy.
Did you find the TikTok game?
I want to watch it.
Yeah.
Oh my gosh.
Wish it would ring.
That's not it.
That's not like actually popping.
Don't worry.
March is way worse than you and I.
I put on a blazer in my finest jewelry in case any of the national news wants to use this and air it without my consent.
Okay.
My video dressing my favorite former co-worker, Harrison Buckert, has popped off.
And I'm about it because now I am a voice for the people that he attacked.
And since the mainstream media is going to use whatever content they want, I thought I might as well dressed up and give him a formal speech.
Her hair has never been about whether or not a woman should.
Okay, she's being a feminist.
I'm too busy for that.
Yeah, boo.
You know, we talked about Gabe being logged into Marsh's Twitter right now and that we should go through his DMs and do a tier list of his DMs.
Yeah.
Oh, that's fucking sick.
Sinister.
It's your name.
For the record, Marsh.
Gabe is a good friend.
He's shaking his head now.
Yeah, no, he's actually shaking his head.
Yes.
He's like, yeah, let's do that.
Okay.
Let's DM girls on it.
Yeah, let's DM girls.
Guys.
And be like, hey, what size are your pussy, my queen?
I'm out here shopping for tampons.
Yeah.
That's what we should do.
We should do that.
He's an ally.
Okay.
So essentially, this guy just sucks.
He hasn't apologized or anything since.
Of course, he didn't apologize.
As a matter of fact, first of all, matter of fact, he doubled down in a quote.
He says, Women should have more babies than thoughts and not T-H-O-T-S, like thoughts.
He did.
Yeah.
He said that.
I'm not even kidding.
Women should have more babies.
And I don't know if this was like an onion article or he actually, yes.
Oh, that was a satirical.
There's no way.
Austin thought you got fake news.
You got fake news.
Listen, listen.
Oh, my God.
It doesn't matter because he's just crushed.
I don't know if he like doubled down or not.
It doesn't really matter that he doubled down because obviously that crowd of people that are like really desperate for any kind of right-wing sentiment are so hungry for someone to come out and be like, that's right, women should stay in the kitchen.
And then they go all out.
That's why Harrison Bucker's jersey is currently the most, the highest-selling jersey in the NFL.
Harrison Bucker's jersey went crazy.
These guys, first of all, let me just say something.
If you're buying a jersey with another man's name on it, you're gay.
Okay.
That's gay as fuck.
What are you?
What are you?
Are you his girlfriend?
Is that why you're wearing that?
You're gay.
Okay.
And there's nothing wrong with it, but you're gay.
So that's number one.
Number two.
Okay.
Number two.
These guys are so fucking desperate for someone to be like, that's right, women should stay in the kitchen that you bought a kicker's jersey, bro.
You bought a kicker's jersey.
Do you know anyone?
You love football.
You love the Vikings.
Would you buy the Vikings kicker jersey?
If he won the Super Bowl with it, like with the kick.
If he kicked the winning field goal for the Super Bowl, absolutely.
But would you like buy randomly?
No.
It's the most insane thing.
Like, it's the least significant.
No, I would never buy the kicker's jersey.
Like his job.
I bought Travis Kelsey's jersey because he's America's boyfriend.
Yeah, that makes sense.
That's like that's Travis Kelsey.
But this is different.
This is the kicker.
Yeah.
Like it's like buying like a it's like buying a t-shirt with like one of Taylor Schwarz backup dancers on it.
Oh, like no, that would probably be less weird.
They're called the starlights.
The starlights.
Sorry.
No one, no one is fucking buying kicker jerseys out here unless it's like a significant kick that like won the Super Bowl or something.
Or did or like a game save.
Yeah, but now it represents something.
It's like the let's go brand and shit.
Assassin Creed Casting Controversy00:07:34
Yeah.
And these guys are just, I'm just, the reason why I brought this up is because like they're so fucking pathetic and they are so desperate ultimately for anyone and everyone to just like say the same dumb shit that they believe that they'll show out.
They will go.
You know what?
Fuck you.
You're wrong.
I need the viewership.
Listen, if you guys go ahead, go ahead, Queen.
I'm literally in the kitchen on the weekends on my stream.
If you need a home wife simulator, I take gifted subs and Twitch primes.
So that's amazing.
The reason why I brought this up, though, is because a lot of other people are also starting to notice that when a content creator is like, has been around in the space for a very long time and then they start noticing like a decline that normally happens because your content gets a little stale, maybe start people, maybe people start hating on you or whatever.
They always do this right-wing heel turn.
And I don't want to like, I'm not here to like name names or start drama or anything like that.
The only reason why I'm talking about it is because those right-wing guys do show the fuck up.
They do.
They show up.
Like the audience is incredibly, like there is a, there is a festering community of people out there that are, that feel rudderless, that feel like there's not a single person representing their interests, which is ironic because like the entire system represents their interests, but I'm not going to get into that.
So they literally will just be like, that's it.
Finally, someone is saying exactly how I believe exactly how I feel.
And the things that most people are saying is just like the dumbest shit possible.
Why am I bringing this up?
Because I wanted to talk about the next subject.
Yosuke.
He is a historic black samurai.
Okay.
Assassin's Creed.
I can't wait.
I love Assassin's Creed.
Assassin's Creed, Ubisoft, has officially announced its next installation of the franchise.
People love franchise very.
Let me guess.
People are outraged.
They think it's woke.
There you go.
Oh.
Assassin's Creed's next game is going to be in Japan.
And this has been something that everyone has been waiting for because Assassin's Creed, for those of you who don't know, it will go and like recreate certain periods of time.
It's actually like the historical recreations of cities is actually so solid that my mom has used the game in an educational manner in her classes at fucking college.
That's crazy.
Yeah.
So it's, it's definitely, it's definitely like almost perfect recreation.
I played the pirate one.
That was the best one is what most people say.
Other than the first game.
I loved it.
And the thing is, the thing is, like, you might not be a fan of the franchise in general.
You might not like what it looks like now.
There is what I like to call the Ubisoft bloat where the UI is too much.
And I'm not going to get into like the nerdy components of why Assassin's Creed could be better, but sometimes misses the mark.
But it is really funny because gamers are very mad.
Why are they mad?
Because they were really excited at the prospect of playing Assassin's Creed in the Japans.
Okay.
And now there's two characters, two main characters.
One is a ninja.
The other is a samurai.
They're enemies usually historically.
And the samurai, well, the samurais are cops and ninjas are assassins.
I didn't know that.
Yeah, I didn't know it either.
That's crazy.
I thought they were just cool guys.
Both of them.
I mean, they can collaborate.
Okay.
But remember, samurai are cops.
They are a part of the protection unit for important people.
So they made the male main character, the samurai component in the game.
They detailed him after a historic figure, the first ever black samurai, Yusuke.
And the other side of it, the ninja component, the assassin component, is actually a woman.
So gamers are very mad.
Gamers are double mad.
They are very upset.
Wow, they hit.
They hit one of the most frustrating.
Yeah.
They're saying, why, why a black person?
Ninja can't be women.
If they're on their period, they'll leave a fucking trail.
We'll find them.
Yeah.
The game is not out yet.
And yet people are already very upset about it because they're saying it's woke DEI.
What's DEI mean?
Like a diversity hire.
Diversity, equity, and inclusion is what DEI is.
And the reality is it's just a substitute for saying that's a black person and I don't like it.
Or that's a woman and I don't like it.
That's just it's just like a new way of saying it.
Back in the day, you know, it used to be the N-word.
You just say the N-word.
Then you couldn't say the N-word.
So you started talking about like force bussing.
That.
Can you hear that?
Insane I mean insane, he said it.
Like him, he is out of control.
He literally is like i'm gonna go.
He's living his best life.
No, did somebody steal my food?
Or did Murat bring it in?
Oh, oh man, there's just drama on a sundae.
Oh, he's yelling.
He's yelling at Murat Rank.
Just saying no.
No, no.
No.
As Murat is turning off of his like buzz saw.
Why do you got to yell at him?
He's building a spaceship.
Let him be happy.
No, he's fixing up his trailer and he's like cutting.
He's using a saw to cut metal right now.
It's too loud.
I told him that.
My guy.
So anyway, people are upset.
Clicking on the article.
Terrified.
That's crazy.
I can't wait to play it.
Yeah, me too.
Hashtag UB sponsor.
Hashtag Ubisoft sponsor me.
Well, Japanese fans are puzzled.
Yeah.
So that's the other component of this because the people that were mad were mad on behalf.
American gamers were mad on behalf of Japanese people being like, oh, why are you putting a black person instead of a Japanese man in the game?
And Japanese people are like, what the fuck are you saying?
We love Yasuke because Yasuke is a very famous figure.
Yasuke is a very famous figure in Japanese culture.
He has been in prior games as well.
Never as a main character, but he's been like a very formidable opponent in games.
There was an anime in America that they made about Yasuke as well for Netflix.
That wasn't that great, but it doesn't really matter.
Like, this is a part of Japanese history.
It's a part of Japanese culture.
And Japanese people don't give a shit that it's a black character in a sassicreed.
They actually like it.
I am a weeb.
I've played a shit ton of Japanese games made by Japanese people, Japanese games made by white people, Ghost of Tsushima, Sekiro, to name a few.
And Yashuke was also in other games, not the two games that I mentioned.
There are plenty of samurai games where you're a Japanese guy.
Plenty of samurai games where you can do that.
I think this is great.
It's cool.
When does it come out?
Rapunzel Versions and Profit Farming00:04:48
I'm not sure.
I think it's great and it's wonderful.
Who gives a fuck?
It's also hilarious because, like, even if he wasn't historically accurate, it's fucking Assassin's Creed.
The whole point is like, you're an assassin with epigenetic memories.
Like, you literally flash forward to the future.
Adam and Eve are like aliens.
Who gives a shit if it's a woman?
If it's for non-gamers, this is happening with Disney too, because they're doing a Rapunzel.
And I believe it's casted as someone that is not white.
And the Disney moms are losing their mind because Rapunzel has to be white.
If you search Rapunzel live action.
Wait, really?
Yeah.
It's kind of like it's Ariel all over again.
Has not announced.
Oh, they haven't announced.
But they're already speculating that Rapunzel could be non-white.
Yeah.
Isn't the OG story of Rapunzel like Indian or something too?
Like, I'm pretty sure.
I don't think it's like a, I think it's like a German recreation.
I believe so.
And so it's just like, but people, it's just so crazy that people get so worked up.
I mean, it's literally like a game.
No, it is a German.
It is a German.
It's, oh, God, Rapunzel is, of course, Brothers Grimm.
Jesus fucking Christ.
Yeah.
Brothers Grimm story was developed from the French literary fairy tale of Persinet by Charlotte Rose de Quément de la Force, which itself is an alternative version of the Italian fairy tale, Petro Sinella, by Giambattista Basil.
That's it.
So, and the tale is classified as an Erin Thompson by type 310.
The Maiden in the Tower's plot has been used and parodied in various media.
So the research, some researchers have, however, proposed that the earliest possible interpretation of Maiden and Tower archetypes is to pre-Christian European or proto-Indo-European sun or dawn goddess myths in which the light deity is trapped and is rescued.
Similar myths include that of the Baltic solar goddess Sol, who is held captive in a tower by a king, and also Perseus.
Inspiration may also be taken to the classical myth of the hero Perseus.
Perseus, the mother of Princess Danae, was confined to a bronze tower by her own father, Acrisius, the king of Argos.
So obviously a lot of the myths are like recycled throughout culture and throughout history.
I do love that people get very offended and very mad about it because it's like, I just don't.
I will never understand.
It's kind of like Little Mermaid.
Like, who said mermaids are only white?
What the fuck?
Yeah.
What the hell?
It happens every time.
I know who.
Racists.
It just happens every time.
It's just who cares?
I don't know why they care so much.
Yeah.
I don't understand why they care so much.
I am a firm.
I guess I'm just not racist.
No, like, I'm a firm believer in make good shit.
Here, I'll tell you the other side of this argument because a lot of people do actually just juggle IP or recycle IP.
Like works.
They're even ghostbusters.
Fuck that shit.
No, my point is make a good fucking movie.
Make something new.
Make a good movie.
If you're going to make the old movie, don't just rely on targeting a new demographic.
It is kind of how I feel.
I feel like if you're going to do a Rapunzel remake, do the Brothers Grimm version.
Do something fucking different.
Like, don't just do the Disney version.
It's just, oh, fuck.
First of all, I mean, this grim version would be probably darkest.
That would be crazy.
You know, the Brothers Grimm Cinderella.
At the end, birds come down and peck out the eyes of the stepsisters.
Genius idea.
Rapunzel horror movie where she lets down her hair and kills people.
Yeah, she hangs people by her hair.
Yeah.
Rapunzel Rapunzel.
She's a horror.
She's like beautiful.
She's like a sexy movie.
No, not a horror movie where she's just a whore.
And she pulls them up and she's like, she has like sex cults.
She's like sticking her pussy out the window.
She's like, she's like, cubes out the window instead of her hair.
Yeah.
That'd be crazy.
Come on up.
Climb on up and fuck me.
My point I was going to make is that like there is a lot of the same capitalist interest that you see in these big corporations that are simply trying to max out on profits without actually like caring about the art in and of itself.
It always is major problem in Hollywood.
The major problem in every facet of our lives where like any matter of artistic expression Is softened, dulled, cut off from what makes it unique and great and turned into this like commodity that will be recycled endlessly.
And one aspect of that, I think, is doing stuff like this, where they'll just like take the exact same franchise, take the exact same thing, but then just like, you know, race swap a character, gender swap, whatever, right?
Ouija Board Patreon Announcement00:03:14
And people get frustrated at that because they're racist.
And some people, on the other hand, also have that racist dog in them, but simultaneously don't understand that the real reason why people are doing this is because it makes money, or at least like they're desperately trying to farm the same exact IP, and that they should be angry at the profit-seeking motive that is at the heart of this industry, at the heart of every industry, as a matter of fact,
instead of mad at like a black main character or a brown main character in their beloved franchise, because who gives a shit at the end of the day?
As long as the product is good, you know, I'll eat that slop.
Me too.
On that note, I believe we're at an hour.
We're going to the Patreon.
We're going to the Patreon, but we have an announcement to make about the Patreon.
Okay.
I launched a show last week.
There was a huge hit.
It was called, what are we calling it?
Austin Show Collins.
Gabe's new here.
He has a newspaper.
Advice with Austin Show.
Advice with Austin Show, where I, you call a number, leave a voicemail, and myself and some of the cast will answer your, give you advice on whatever questions you're asking.
And today, folks, QD is going to sit with me on the Patreon.
This is in addition to the paywall portion.
And we are going to listen to your voicemails and we're going to give you advice.
I'm giving you 20 minutes, bitches.
Yeah, 20 minutes, bitches.
Advice show with Austin Show.
It's in the Patreon.
It's coming out weekly.
Tune in, subscribe to the Patreon to see it, as well as this paywall portion where we're going to go another hour of the train rolling.
And we appreciate your support.
And we will see you behind Zipaywall.
Bye.
Bye, everybody.
Take care.
Take care.
So we got out just to the next one.
I'm not entirely mixture.
I can't really get answers because my mom's dead.
So it makes it a little hard to get some answers.
We could talk.
We could Ouija board.
We should get a Ouija board to talk to.
Hey, mom.
With grandpa not me.
She's like, bitch, what?
Ask me how I'm doing.
Yeah, exactly.
Okay, so tell me why you're wearing these clothes.
Okay, so this is what's funny.
She'd be like, it's really odd that he's not here with me right now.
I think he's down there.
So yes.
So every once in a while, when laundry gets too much and I can't keep up with it, because Ludd is a big pile leaver.
He leaves like, he'll just, he does, it's actually, I find it adorable, which sorry, this is probably cringe to most people, but it'll be TV time.
He'll say TV time and I'll take his pants off and then just sit in his boxers because his jeans are uncomfortable because his butt's so big.
And so he takes his pants off and then he just sits in his underwear and he runs around the house underwear.