HasanAbi joins FaZe Clan amidst internal drama involving Cutie's sudden departure, which she claims was unpaid and occurred during the organization's "darkest era." The hosts critique FaZe's male-dominated roster under Brother Banks while recounting chaotic nights at Dead Mouse featuring Tommy Lee. They debate relationship dynamics among streamers like Ludwig and XQC, addressing controversies ranging from alleged homophobic slurs to the exclusion of partners during NFL Draft moments. Ultimately, the episode highlights the volatile intersection of corporate ownership, gender dynamics, and personal infamy within modern gaming culture. [Automatically generated summary]
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Dead Mouse Night Out00:07:12
He made a noise that I've never heard a human make before.
He made a noise and he was like, yeah.
Are you guys ready?
That's what he said.
Listen, we went to Dead Mouse at the Bowl last night.
Okay.
And for maximum efficiency, Marsh decided that instead of buying individual drinks, we should only drink full bottles of wine.
Three bottles later.
It's a little rocky right now.
Good morning.
Good morning to those of the Fear Am podcast.
Welcome to another episode where we are recording at eight o'clock in the morning.
Wide-eyed and bushy-tailed.
We're fresh, though.
Fresh.
No, Will is, which is like pissing me off a lot.
Why?
Because you're not a morning person.
Yeah, but we usually do this after we've all done like five broadcasts and you guys just tune out.
It just like pisses me off because I've known you for a decade plus.
I never see you this cheery.
I never see you this cheer.
This has been having an awesome time.
You have been.
He came in first.
He came in.
He walked in before eight, which is crazy.
Yeah.
Which is not crazy, though.
Let's talk about this part.
Cutie was the last person.
Cutie, we actually tabulated.
We did the math.
This is a Marsh just got here.
We couldn't have started.
You could have started without me.
You could not have started without Marsh.
We did do some math.
We did crunch some numbers and we realized you've never been on time for an episode in our 100 episode run.
No, not once.
Not once.
I believe that.
I do.
I really believe it.
It is crazy.
And I'm not going to change.
I'm not.
At first, it made sense.
At first, it made sense because you were coming from like an entirely different state.
You know what I mean?
You were like driving from Sandy.
You were driving from Nevada.
Yeah.
Right?
But like now you don't live that far from me.
I just don't.
I just, guys.
She's tired.
She's tired.
Like, you.
It's so early.
You have the floor.
Go ahead and speak.
Okay.
I want to let everyone know that I just got accosted by words because I don't really know what accosted means.
I got accosted by words when I got here because I'm cozy.
I'm in my sweatshirt.
I'm in my pants.
I'm in my Lulus.
And these guys are like, cutie, you're not sexy enough for this podcast.
This is completely erroneous.
Completely erroneous.
Cutie, the angle of this, you're ugly.
No, that's crazy.
The slander didn't say that.
What a mistake we made by letting this bitch talk.
That's insane.
This is why you should always silence women.
Oh, yeah, hold on.
Hold on.
The way this happened.
The way this happened, and you can verify if this is true.
Cutie said, I don't like this camera angle.
It makes my ass look fat.
And Hassan and I both went, yo, use it.
That's fine.
Start shit.
Start.
Start showing some of that juicy stuff is what we said.
Get us some viewership.
Yeah, we were like, why aren't you looking like a harlot?
No, no, freaking, you're not oiled up.
We said, get those feet out like fan fans.
I did take my feet out.
And everyone gets mad at me.
It's like she's got little slits on the side of the pants.
Like, that's not nearly enough, bro.
That's not nearly enough.
We got a fucking Mario, Mario Kart Grand Prix sweater on right now.
No cleavage.
What is this?
Guys, Austin's not showing any cleavage.
Yeah, you need to slut it up to me.
No, I'm sick and tired of being slut-shamed.
What?
No, we want you to slut.
No, that's all you're doing.
We are shaming you for not being a slut sham.
People think that I'm eating ass all the time, fucking a bunch of twinks.
Oh my god.
That's not true.
I'm going to dress more appropriate.
And I'm not going to bring attention to my body.
What are you talking about?
Austin's your only topic of conversation.
Austin's favorite thing.
Austin's favorite thing is just like to start new drama surrounding him.
Like start new lies surrounding him by just openly saying, oh, people are saying that I have a massive penis.
He's Trumpian.
He's very Trumpian.
Anytime he has a topic, he'll be like, people are saying this.
Folks are there.
Folks are saying it.
Yeah.
And then like he gets bored of the, he gets bored of the lies.
There's no lie.
So then like three weeks later.
There's no lie.
My stream and be like, why is everybody saying you and I are dating Hassan?
And it's like, bro, you, no one is saying that.
That's funny, though.
You're the one who tried to start.
And also that Hassan drinks Starbucks coffee.
That was funny, too.
Oh, yeah.
That was a real thing.
You are so bad at being gay.
Like, you should be way messier.
You should be a way bigger pathological liar.
Oh, so you don't think I lie enough?
Yeah, but don't actually, because we will put you back in the closet.
Okay.
If you keep that energy.
You guys are like my keepers.
Yeah.
Well, all right, before we move off, I got to go back to Dead Mouse at the bowl last night because Marsh and I, for us, this was our Aristotle, kitty.
Oh, wow.
I will admit something.
That's the what?
I will admit something.
Marsh and I both cried at one point.
It was very meaningful.
It was very emotional.
But the vibe was very good.
The vibe was very good, except for one moment that I want to show it to you guys.
And you guys can tell me, please be the judge of this.
So Dead Mouse brought out a number of artists throughout the evening.
One artist that just kind of appeared on stage was Tommy Lee, the drummer of Motley Crew.
Oh, oh, oh, Tommy Lee that was married to Pamela Anderson.
The robber broke in and stole that corner.
I know.
I'm a Motley Crew fan, right?
So I immediately identified that this was Tommy Lee.
Now, we don't have all the footage from last night.
I just took a quick video.
No one's talking about this, but it is my impression and Marsh's impression that no one invited Tommy Lee on stage and that he just kind of appeared there.
Take a look.
Take a look at these vibes.
He's wearing the dream hat on the left and he is tweaking right now.
Wait.
The vibes are really uncomfortable everywhere.
But the vibes aren't just him.
I think.
Yeah, who's the guy with the long hair doing this?
No, that's his producer.
This guy looks like Garth from.
Wait, who's where's Dead Mouse?
He's the one in the hat.
Yeah.
I thought he wore a mouse head.
Well, this, he opened for himself.
Wait, Will, I'll be honest.
I think maybe you guys were tweaking.
Wait, they're talking to one another, though.
I'm telling you, the vibe was a little strange.
I think y'all were tweaking.
You think?
You think it was a bottle of wine?
No, because I think the vibes are kind of strange.
I thought the blonde.
You could have told me the blonde guy was the one that was kind of strange.
That's his producer.
I thought all the vibes were weird.
FaZe Brand Confusion00:15:53
Okay.
It looks like, to me, it looks like four guys that stumbled into a garage sale that someone was selling a DJ and they like all started tinkering with it like old white men do.
Yeah.
Yeah.
What?
This is how I feel.
You guys don't want to hear how I feel.
No, I think I'm not.
No, we need to silence this bitch.
I thought it was great.
Okay, initiated.
No, no, no.
It was great.
No, I like the tip.
We need you to stop.
I was laughing at your jokes.
That wasn't a joke.
That was my feelings.
Your feelings are funny.
If you run the clock, you've taught me.
You are naturally humorous and pretty and beautiful and natural.
Valid.
Yeah.
She's gonna make another.
Oh, she's gonna make another.
She's gonna make another compilation where she just stares blankly into the distance.
I hate it here, so I will go to Secret Gardens in my mind.
Did you?
I saw that lyrics.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, I could tell because they were bad.
I saw that.
Oh, you want to talk about old men at a garage sale?
Oh, no.
Bitches write lyrics with AI.
Oh, no.
Listen, the chalk, the lab with tattoos was a banger.
I want to go back to the 1830s, minus the racism.
My anti-racist queen, don't even get it started.
I'm a Swifty.
At least she didn't say with the racism.
Fair.
She said just the yellow fever.
The fucking dengue fever, bubonic plague.
Yeah, she's like, I want to fucking get executed by a doctor for having gangrene.
Bleeding with leeches was sick.
Bloodletting.
Oh, food's outside.
Tell them.
Wait, your brother.
Wait, my food.
Tell the dog.
Kaya, get the food.
She will eat the food.
I'll go get the food.
Okay.
It's a lot.
That was that was that was nice of Austin.
Let's talk shit.
As soon as he's out of frame, he's gonna drop something.
He's gonna drop something.
No, no, he's not gonna drop something.
You want to take that bet?
Can I, can I be a leaky?
Can I be a shady bitch?
Yeah.
So, Austin, the other week, he was mad at us.
I won't leak too much why, but he was mad at us.
And he had mine and Will's salad in his hand and he threw it on the creepy.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I watched it happen.
It was funny as hell.
So I thought it was funny who gets the food right now.
Yeah, cutie looked at me at one point.
Was like, where's the food?
It's gone now.
It's gone.
Yeah.
It recovered.
It recovered.
It does give me a little PTSD.
No, the food, but it was awesome because it was a salad.
So we shook it.
Yeah, he pre-shook it.
He preached Kim Kardashian salad.
He pre-shook it for you.
You don't even appreciate it.
Dude, this episode is great.
See, we're like happy and joyful.
Yeah, we should always, yeah, we should always do it at fucking 8 a.m.
Yesterday you were coming off of not one, but two streams and a podcast 11 hours on camera.
That's why they call me the goat.
But I'm just saying you would rather that thank you.
Jesus Christ.
Fucking fucking Austin is on this tub show with Pokemon and he's like, name one woman.
And Pokey was like, like, name a woman on Twitch that's Instagram.
No, he said, name your favorite.
Is that what it was?
And then she said, can I name streamers?
And he goes, yes.
And she's like, she's like, no.
She goes, my friend Janet.
I was like sitting there.
I was like, Pokey, you bitch.
Oh, I'm right here.
Yeah, Pokey and I have drama.
I don't fuck with her.
It could be because that, like, your relationship started off with you having her as your wallpaper.
So I feel like once that happens, like, there's never.
Yeah, she really is the goat, though.
I'm the goat.
Nobody says that.
I re-injured my rib at the rage cage.
And this is just excruciating.
What's wrong?
Oh, you mean the Starbucks coffee?
Yeah.
You brought Starbucks into my household.
That's crazy.
I didn't.
No, it's because he forgot to order for me, so he had to split.
I didn't order Starbucks.
That's crazy.
He didn't order me a coffee.
You better not have ordered Starbucks.
This has Fifi on it.
Yeah.
And Kaya, where'd this come from?
My mom made it.
Aww.
That's nice.
Yeah.
What would we talk about if we were alone?
You and I?
We have so much to talk about.
Really?
Are you kidding me?
I don't know if we could.
I feel like I would just get mad at you.
That's what you do anyway, even if it's not just you and I. Jesus, a lot of anger coming from you.
I am angry.
What the fuck are we doing?
I am not a morning person.
I am a morning person in comparison to like the regular people who are not morning persons.
I'm not me until I've had my coffee.
I'm not me until I. I'm not sure if this would be your best show because you are a person who you have a battery.
And when that battery's gone, you start doomstrolling Twitter.
Oh, no, I don't have Twitter on my phone anymore.
It's great for my mental health.
You delete it.
I don't use it anymore either.
I deleted Twitter from my phone.
I tweet about fancy Egg McMuffin.
Yeah, you want to?
No, I don't want it.
I don't want to.
I don't want to.
I'm nervous about my cortisol levels in the morning.
That stress?
What?
Yeah.
Wait, no, no.
Tell me about it.
My heart feels tight right now and I'm drinking coffee.
No, your heart should be able to handle it.
I've looked into it.
You've looked into her heart?
Not her heart, but...
You know, your cortisol levels are sometimes high in the morning.
I'm worried about my heart too right now.
Yeah.
We got to get that EKG.
I want an EKG.
You know, you can buy one.
The Apple Watch literally has like...
I know, but I can't find my charger.
And it looks ugly.
Yeah.
We don't.
What?
They sell an EKG at Target.
You can put your two fingers.
You sent it to me.
Wait, did I really?
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
I forgot about that.
We should buy it.
We should.
It's only like 70 bucks.
It's got like a 4.5.
Have you seen?
Do you think the thing works?
There's this thing that you stand on and it shakes you.
And it's supposed to help clear out your lymphatic system.
And I see people on TikTok with it.
Do you think it works?
Probably.
Can you send it to me?
No, it doesn't.
No, I know exactly what that is.
That's like, they have it at gyms.
That's what you're talking about, right?
You hold on to it and it shakes your feet.
Okay, I saw something ridiculous.
There was a workout, you know?
There was a shaking.
You guys seen the ab shocker?
That is fun.
You guys had the ab shocking?
That is real.
Wait, is that real?
No, there's an ab shocker.
It's a Tim's machine.
Yeah, and it like stimulates your ab muscles.
So you think you can get six pack abs with one of those things?
No.
Would it help tone you?
But it would.
It'll hurt.
It'll hurt, definitely.
But technically, you could use that because it is still activating your muscles.
People use it for recovery.
That originates from physical therapy.
So it's not going to tone my abs.
So I shouldn't buy one.
I think the pain is not worth the benefits, I guess.
No.
Oh, so I saw like one of those offices selling them for $1,000 or something.
She's still coming in here.
Fiona, no.
Oh, no, you can come in.
Well, if she comes in here, then Kaya's going to come in bouldering.
She comes in here and farts again.
Oh, God.
That too.
That was awful.
She do behave.
Guys, I have really bad news.
What's that?
I didn't text you guys about it because I was waiting to tell you here.
I'm my moment.
You ready?
I've been dropped from face.
They dropped me and they didn't tell me.
Wow.
And I found out via the tweet.
Control alt delete.
Yeah, I got deleted.
I heard it's because you're just like, you're from like the Corpo era and you weren't with the family.
Well, it's weird because I really thought I was an original gangster.
True.
Can we walk it back quickly and let the audience know what you're referencing right now?
Yeah.
So yesterday.
So, okay, even further.
You look cool.
Yeah, you should keep doing it.
Gonna do this while you're talking, because i'm just like this is like begone demon, like that type of to you because you're a woman.
I've been FAZE.
I just I can't tell, I can't even explain to you how much I hate women guys.
I well, I need, we need to go back even further.
So, if you don't know, Phase it's a really cool people religious cult um, that hates women and gay people but also loves call of duty.
Yeah, um.
So FAZE first started their little org and we love them, they're so great.
And then they get bought out by big Corpa.
They sell, they get sold to the, to the guys in the WIGS Corpo Corpo, and then Banks is like hey, what the heck.
But while Corpo's there, they sign a bunch of people.
They sign uh like, like Grace and I know I say Grace because there's lots of drama, Grace From Stranger Things one of my friends um, she flex.
Yeah, we're friends.
We went and saw Christina Aguilera in a backyard, which I tried to tell you guys about one episode but kept cutting me off, so you never heard about how I saw Christina Aguilera in the backyard.
Wow, how would we have ever lived?
I cannot believe you saw Christina Aguilera in a backyard.
Our relationship the, the trajectory of our relationship, has been altered forever.
Did she play dirty?
I don't remember she played dirty in a backyard.
She sang one song and I don't remember.
Was it like a genie in a bottle?
No, well then, that's a waste.
What time, what songs does she have other than those two songs?
Well maybe, if you would have, if you would have heard.
No matter what guys.
Is that Christina Aguilera?
Yes yeah, because why are you getting he's?
Just how dare you have gay boys?
It feels like he's pretending to be gay right now.
No, I love Christina Aguilera, really.
Name 10 songs.
Name 10.
Okay, come on, that's ridiculous.
That's like naming 10.
Name one other than the three we just left.
Name 10 songs and maybe you can figure out which one Cutie heard.
There's no way in the back.
This is like naming 10 women.
I could name 10 password songs in two seconds.
Yeah, because she's got 500 of them quick aside.
I could name 10.
Did you see this stats video for name 100 women?
Yeah, did you see that?
He was like, and then there's Will Knap.
You had the porn, 35 porn star.
Wait, you're the only reason why I saw the stats and I was like I saw, I saw 33, 33 porn stars and I was like, well, like did Will not participate, like what happened?
There's only 33.
You need to do the 100 porn star run.
So I I told, I told my girlfriend, I was like Caroline, I bet I could clear this with just porn stars.
She's like try, and I was like, okay, which is why I front-loaded them all like that, but I could probably hit a hundred.
I think second with the most porn stars was Slime.
Oh for sure.
Yeah, makes sense.
Slime could be a porn star continue.
You were seeing it, Christina Aguilera, in the backyard.
No, I don't care anymore.
We're talking about phase, we're facing up, we're talking about phase.
So Grace got signed to Phase and Phase freaked out a bunch of the original gangsters.
Yeah um, they freaked out and they're like, why are you signing this cute little blonde girl?
And there was lots of drama.
And so then FaZe was like, fuck this shit.
And she left.
But that was a big corpo decision.
Anyway, they kicked her out.
She left.
She laughed.
She had evolution, but it was like, it was like she was a lot of public backs.
She cried because, like, one of the dudes was like, he was evil.
What's the name of that dude?
They all have names.
It's like Zeppo, Zippy, and Boppy.
Yeah, it'll be like FaZe Dick Cancer.
What's up?
Coming to you.
Yeah, that's right.
That name is actually gas, though.
If I could go back and make my stream name Dick Cancer, it's way better than QA.
Yeah, what's up?
It's FaZe Dick Cancer coming to you live today.
We're going to talk about a nude meta going on.
People are naming 100 women.
I'm going to name 100 qualities I hate about women.
I mean, my gamer tag isn't much better than that.
Many of them were really bad.
Extra filthy.
What was it?
Well, you had another one.
The violator.
And then, and then he had a super lame rap scallion.
Dirty rap scallion.
Dirty rap scallion.
That one is like, how do you go from violator to dirty rap scallion?
You're such a theater kid.
I just.
Well, the rap scallion was from The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack, which is one of my favorite cartoons.
Oh, I would love a pancake.
Okay, you want me to order one?
No.
From the griddle?
No, because I'm going to Disneyland after this.
She's going to Disneyland all week.
Yeah.
Wait, we got to finish the first one.
I know we'll get there.
Sorry.
Let's get back to the face things.
Thank you.
All right.
So, anyway, big corpora buys FaZe and makes a lot of decisions, but then all of a sudden, Banks is like, I'm taking back what's mine.
Yeah.
Brother Banks stands up.
Peace be upon him.
He buys it.
And also with you.
Does he buy it?
Yeah, I think he bought his interest back.
He bought his interest back.
Brother Banks is back in charge.
With cryptocurrency, I hope.
With this cryptocurrency, I don't even know what Brother Banks looks like anymore because his profile pictures are still NFTs, but he buys it back.
Okay, can I pause for a second?
This is unironic, but you know, all the faith stuff aside, Brother Banks, that's my homie.
Okay, that's my homie.
We love Brother Banks.
Go on.
Why are you?
What are you afraid of?
He's afraid of going to an influencer party and not being welcome.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
I always go to influencer party.
Brother Banks has never been mean to me when I met him.
In fact, he was a little afraid of me.
Banks was always nice when I met him.
No, he was really nice.
I was at a party, and I said to Ludwig, I said, I want a picture with Banks.
And then Ludwig goes, Banks, my girlfriend wants a picture with you.
And he goes, ooh, is she going to like dog me?
I said, I would never, brother.
Until now.
No, I never dog him.
I'm not dogging him right now.
It's too phony.
We're phony.
To be honest, it's not, we're not even dogging him.
We are just recanting exactly what happened.
He's still my brother.
And ultimately, what happened was FaZe let go a large swath of their creativity.
He had to get rid of all the crypto babies.
Or no, sorry, corpo babies.
And then tweeted control delete.
Yeah, it was kind of badass, but it was also really sad for Kaylee.
Wild.
I saw Kaylee.
She loves FaZe and she's been signed with FaZe and she reps FaZe more than any of the other FaZe boys.
And she just got axed.
And yeah, and I guess she found out about it.
All right, let's look at the back and forth between Kaylee and FaZe and like some random person that chimed in, which FaZe Brother Banks responded to.
Go to FaZe Banks' Twitter replies and you will see a fuck this basically.
He's just been like tweeting at people non-stop.
I don't know the intricacies of the like the inner workings of FaZe all that well, but obviously he didn't just cut all the corpo people because Nick Mercks came during the corpo run.
Uh, so did FaZe Ronaldo and those guys, which by the way, of course, shouts out to Nick Mercks.
That's my goat.
Corporate Takeover Reality00:07:25
Also love him.
Um, regardless of our falling out because I made fun of Dr. Disrespect's divorce.
Um, you know, you're forever in my heart, Nick.
That night that you signed a FaZe that still is in the top of my DM inbox.
What FaZe Clan took photos of us and we were partying.
Anyway, what the fuck?
Those guys were also, I don't know, those guys were also, those guys were also in the corpo era, and yet they didn't get axed because they saw them as valuable.
Rage just joined FaZe.
Am I crazy?
Yeah.
Did he get axed too?
No.
No, they see your rage as like a valuable asset.
I mean, he is.
Your age is dope.
Yeah, I like your age as well.
I'm just simply stating that I think it seems like they wanted to maintain like a FaZe brand or something and make it just friends.
I noticed just friends, but it's a bunch of people that don't know each other.
Yeah, you know who's not friends?
Girls.
Yeah, there are no girls.
Do they have any women left in the org?
I mean, that's kind of base.
Yeah.
Thank you, dude.
Let's go.
That's why we love Brother Banks.
Okay, so hold on.
So there's no more women left in the org after this.
I don't know.
I think the org has gone down to like eight people.
Yeah, there's no women.
Okay.
And I don't even know if he's like also doing something with Kaya West or something.
Like with the porn.
Hey, FaZe, if you want to sign a girl, I'm right here.
And a homosexual.
I did.
Every single person that keeps getting cut from FaZe, though, they all keep saying, yeah, they never paid me a dime.
And I'm like, why are you bitches putting their logo behind you then?
I'm sorry.
For the love of the game.
That's so funny.
Really?
Dude, if the Jets sign me, they could have me for free.
No one can have me for free.
Yeah, I do so much for free.
He doesn't.
He pays it for the house.
Bro, you literally have suggested paying rent.
What are you talking about?
I know, but he won't let me know.
True.
Thanks for that, by the way.
Thanks, guys.
You're welcome.
Is that why you know?
What?
No, no, no.
It wasn't.
Are you a mastermind?
No, I was joking.
He's actually nice.
Yeah.
Never wanted me to pay rent.
FaZe started off as just a bunch of fucking dudes with big dreams, right?
In our basement in Ohio.
We got together.
We were just like, yeah.
Yeah, we were just like fucking getting doinks and cod, Modern Warfare 2 greatest era.
We're running the shoddy, shoddy knife combos, you know what I mean?
Getting fucking flicks up.
And then this little YouTube, this thing called YouTube comes around and we're like, yo, let's post these videos on YouTube of me getting like triple.
Don't even know what you say.
Like, you're going so deep.
You like, you've, you've, you sound like a part 360 flicks need to be flicked up on YouTube.
We post that shit.
Turns out hella people like it.
Turns out hella people like it.
We get famous.
We go to GameStop.
Everybody recognizes me.
I'm FaZe Banks.
You sound like a scarred ex-girlfriend or something.
Yeah.
Listen.
Every single thing I actually did is actually crazy lore.
I wasn't even joking.
And to summate.
Yeah.
Women are ruining gaming.
Okay.
You know what else women are ruining?
Football.
Especially the NFL draft.
Marsh Q Eagle Scream.
Q America.
We're not.
Craft.
We're not drama.
We got so much drama.
Oh, you want to do more on this?
Oh, we don't have to, but we got it.
Like, you gotta, you can't just, we're just halfway in it.
We got drop.
We didn't even get to the meat of this issue.
Juiciness.
What's the meat?
Are you mad?
No, what's the meat?
I didn't know.
I thought that was the whole topic.
Marsh passed out on the keyboard.
Essentially, the biggest thing was Kaylee.
So Kaylee gets a phone call while she's live on stream where she gets cut from FaZe.
And so she tweets this thing out.
She said, I'm so grateful for all the opportunities.
I'll never forget when I got the phone call and got asked to join FaZe.
The friends I made on the way, the support for my community, everything.
Thank you guys for wishing them the best.
But then Kaylee's on stream and she's like, Yeah, I never got a dime.
Like, I never got a freaking dime.
And FaZe goes, Today sucked.
I promise the only reason you're let go was because a genuine relation couldn't really have ever been formed because of the nature in which you were recruited.
He said, Today sucked.
Yeah, you were recruited, unfortunately, during the darkest era of FaZe, and we just have to wipe our plate clean at all costs.
It's paramount to getting this brand at the vibes at this team, blah, blah, blah.
Essentially, he's like, it's all love.
Like, nothing, no hard feelings.
I don't know.
Like, blah, blah.
But then Kaylee is on stream and she's like, it's not all love.
She's like, it's not all love.
And I'm going to be making a video.
So we stayed on the street.
That's how women be like.
No.
You know what I'm saying?
Like, that's our point, right?
That's what we're.
We're pro-FaZe.
I thought we are pro-phase.
Okay, then you have to be anti-women, QD.
There's no.
Yeah, I'm not like the other girls.
Thank you.
Yeah.
Talk about how they suck and stuff.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We don't even belong on FaZe or in video games or in the NFL.
Yeah.
If you make another podcast, you should just call it pygmies.
That goes crazy.
Pygmies.
No.
I'm not like the other girls.
All jokes aside.
All jokes aside.
What the fuck are these guys doing?
Yeah, sure.
It got owned by, it got corpoed out.
They fucking did a SPAC.
It was a laughing.
It was a laughing stock of Wall Street.
But they dropped Snoop Dogg.
No, why do they have Snoop Dogg?
That's the point.
Like, what the fuck are you guys doing?
I would sign Snoop Dogg.
Like, Lil Yachty, at least, I guess, makes somewhat some sense.
There was a couple football players that are also gamers themselves, but they've always been so clout-focused.
I don't know how FaZe makes money.
Listen, they got to get back to the stuff that matters.
360 slicks.
Just to zoom out on this, I think FaZe ultimately is a portrait, portrait, sorry, of like the gaming enterprise in a focus in that, like all of esports blew up in this huge way at one point.
And so much money was rolling in, and all these orgs were really like expanding kind of exponentially.
And then kind of the bottom fell out, right?
Like all of a sudden, all the investment dollars went away.
Yeah.
And there wasn't really the revenue stream that they thought they were.
I don't know how FaZe makes money.
Well, every org in its own way has like downsized, right?
Especially with like the popularity of League of Legends and some of these Keystone esports titles diminishing.
Now, the difference is these other esports orgs didn't tweet out control alt delete after wiping the slate with people that were working at their company.
It's just, it's a very phase way to handle the reality of the industry.
Yeah, I think that because of the Elon Muskification, or I guess like the late stage capitalist era that we're in, I feel like they're going to succeed.
I just saw the reply from FaZe right there where he just called someone the R-word.
Freezing Studio Conditions00:02:45
Yeah, he's like, I'm not corpo, dude.
You're an R-word.
I won't say it.
I won't even read it.
That's how woke I am.
Anyway, I see it.
My point is, like, this is like fine.
It's just a group of homies playing video games.
Great.
Obviously, it's like pretty devastating for all the people that fucking lost their jobs.
Overall, this entire industry is fraudulent.
I want to get back to OG phase anyway, where they throw dope-ass parties with dope-ass hot girls and dope-ass hot tubs.
Wait, are you doing the character now?
No, I'm just excited to go to the party.
You started getting serious, so she had to bring it back.
I want to go to the hot phase parties, please, brother Banks.
I just think that, I mean, I guess if we're going to talk about like the positives of phase, they are one of the, and always have been, one of the most diverse groups.
Like, one of the most diverse esports groups in general.
They have hella Middle Eastern dudes in there.
They got Hella Mened Boys in there always.
A lot of Bragg, a lot of black and brown folks in there.
Just no women.
Austin, you okay?
What's happening?
Bro, you need to fix your fucking air conditioning.
It's cold in here.
No, it's not.
It's hotter than it's literally so cold that I'm wearing a jacket.
I'm sweating.
I'm sweating in this chair.
What is happening?
Do you have anything?
Austin, I don't have to poop.
Austin, this might be a you thing, big dog, because it is cold as you can.
I'm freezing.
Wait, am I having a panic attack or something?
You might be.
Hold my hand for a second.
Just feel how cold my hand is.
Wait, but feel me.
Feel me.
Yeah, you're warm.
I'm warm.
Feel my back.
I don't want to do that.
You're burning up.
It's hot.
Do you have air conditioning that works?
Austin, Austin, we are sitting in the air conditioning that works.
Three other people, four other people in the room have said air conditioning is actually very cool.
Like, I could use a blanket right now.
Yeah, at least, I'm so cold.
Feel my back.
I feel your back.
I hate touching.
I think it's because I just drank coffee and it was hot.
I'm sorry, but I'm good.
I'm good now.
I like that your immediate response, though, was like...
Why don't you have some iced coffee?
That'd be a good idea.
But I don't want to derail the conversation anymore.
No.
Go ahead.
I think that was.
I think we're done with falling away.
We're done.
We're done.
Let's see where it goes.
American me up.
Marsh, pull it up.
Cute Eagles screaming.
He's throwing up in the bathroom.
Yeah, Marsh left.
Fireworks on screen.
Go back to my previous segue that I cooked up.
That was great.
Draft Day Drama Explained00:14:57
So today, guys, I don't know if you know what happened over the last three days, but it is one of the biggest institutions in sport.
The NFL draft.
Yes.
Yes.
I sent you links on, there you go.
So I don't know if you know this, cutie, but the NFL draft is where every year all teams select their players of the future, right?
We talked about this.
We taught her, remember?
Yeah, I learned all about it.
You don't watch football, but I know about the draft.
Well, it's a big deal.
Sometimes, sorry, I'm holding this and it kind of looks like I'm holding my penis.
And I wonder if you guys were boys.
Is it fun to just sit here and hold your penis?
Big time.
Because there's like nothing to do with my hand, but I'm holding my little bear penis.
I hold my cock when I sleep.
Oh, me too.
You do that too?
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
I think I would do that.
I don't do that.
Wow.
That's crazy that you do that.
I thought it was like weird that I do.
I do that.
I just like having stuff in my hands.
I hold my wabbles, but that's not there.
Draft.
So everybody watches the draft together.
What the heck?
Not me.
Why did I get invited?
Well, you can watch it.
I did it over there.
Is it over?
Oh, yeah.
It's because you're dating a theater kid and not a jock.
But a big part of the draft.
Have you ever had the makings of a varsity athlete?
Way it works is the coach, the GM, and the rest of the staff of the team will call the young athlete and be like, Hey, in this example, CD Lamb, we're taking you with the 11th pick.
Wait, welcome to Dallas.
So, they're not, I thought, oh my, what?
Okay, I thought this was like deal or no deal, and like all the boys are in the background, and they wait until they get called and then they jump up and they're so excited.
They're at home.
So, so only like the top 30 prospects will be at the draft.
Oh, my God.
Anybody outside of that will be at home for some of the top 30 prospects are at home.
I think they make a choice.
No, I'm saying, but usually outside of that, those people are not.
No, do they know that they're going to get a call or not?
So, no one knows for sure if you're going to be drafted or when you're going to be drafted.
You can make a good prediction on like the first two rounds of guys, but 257 players are selected at the NFL draft every year.
So, you're telling me someone could be at the grocery store thinking, man, there's no chance.
And then they get to know the brain.
Yeah, most likely not.
So, you have to declare for the draft.
So, for example, one really funny example this year is the Jets drafted a guy named Jaquiz Stingers, who never played college football.
He played in the CFL and they gave him a call and he didn't really know if he was going to get the call or not.
Where was he?
I'm not sure.
I didn't see a video of that, but like one kid, Brendan Rice, was actually at a funeral.
Oh, shit.
Yeah.
Damn.
So, like, also, some people are sitting here thinking they're going to get the call, and sometimes they never get the call.
So, this is CeeDee Lamb right here.
Okay.
CeeDee Lamb is a top prospect.
He knew he was going to get the call.
He looks cool.
Yeah, he's very cool.
So, he's with his family, and this is a draft day party, right?
And a lot of athletes will do this.
They need more snacks where they think when they think they're going to get the call, their family and loved ones will get together.
Imagine they don't get the call and all the family and loved ones are together.
This has happened to athletes.
This has happened.
Oh, so, all right, ready?
Now, there is something that has happened over the history of the draft.
Okay.
And it's become a trend.
Okay.
And it is the college girlfriends of NFL athletes all of a sudden realizing that their mans might be leaving the equation.
And there is a highlight reel of very awkward interactions with the girlfriend.
Let's pull up CeeDee Lamb.
See if you can notice what happens here, cutie.
His girlfriend on the right.
Oh, she goes to take a look at the phone and he says, Nope, I'll take that.
Obviously, come at hope.
Give me that.
Hold on to the football.
So pause.
So this moment has gone very viral.
Why did she take it?
She wanted to look at who was texting him.
Oh, and he went, nope.
Oh, because now he's getting all these congratulation texts.
Oh, and he, oh, let me decide.
You know who's not from?
Not Bill Bilichek.
Wait.
Not Robert Krab texted him.
Congratulations.
And he's so scared about that.
Yeah.
Can I be devil's advocate?
Sure.
What if he was on the phone?
What if he's he's that was her phone?
Maybe.
Maybe that's her phone in his hand, but he's on the phone, but he's trying to like text his mom from her.
Could be.
We only get a glimpse.
Here's another glimpse.
This is another interesting thing that happens.
Sometimes the athletes need to be protected from their girlfriend by their mothers.
And this has happened.
Protected from the girlfriend.
Take a look.
This man has just been drafted.
Congratulations.
Big tack when Isaiah Wilson from Georgia came from Brooklyn.
Time to adapt to the heat and the conditioning in the south, playing it in Georgia.
Now he'll be playing more than so.
She said, I don't want you in the footage.
What year?
What draft was this?
Dr. Umar approves.
I think this was three or four years ago.
This dude.
Oh, yeah, look at her.
She's loving that she's on the camera.
Yeah.
She's got the poly prep jersey on and she gets bounced.
Dr. Umar approves of this behavior of the moment.
Are they still together?
No.
Oh, hell no.
And so there's another example of this.
If you go to the Olu Fashionu one, this is in this draft.
Not this one.
Save this one.
This one.
So this is Olu Fashiono.
This is this year.
Watch Olu's motherfucker.
He's got so many friends and family.
Yeah.
Watch his mom, though, box out his girlfriend here on the left side.
This is, she could play O-line.
Like, watch, watch this.
Watch this box out.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Yeah.
Just boxing her out.
That's a jet right there, baby.
You think she was doing it on purpose?
That one doesn't look bad.
She's trying to get a leg grab in.
She's like, no.
No, she can't get anything.
At least she's being good.
She's not making it about herself, really.
No, I don't think her mom was doing it.
Oh, look.
See?
No, that's no.
See the mom.
Oh, that's sweet, though.
That's sweet.
No, that's super sweet.
I love that.
I want to get drafted.
This is just a humorous.
I know, but that wasn't even.
That was like, I even.
That was a sweet moment for me.
I like the mom.
Close this one.
This one's not as good.
So that's Olu Fashionou, by the way.
New York jet.
11th player selected off the board.
He's going to protect Aaron Rodgers blinds.
We should draft more.
Wait, Aaron Rogers is still.
Yes.
Listen.
Hassan.
Your body is like a 60-year-old because you pumped it full of Pfizer chemicals.
You're vaxxed and your body is melting like an old bag of ice.
Counterpoint, counterpoint, counterpoint.
Travis Kelsey bag the hottie.
Literally the it boy.
Also has a Super Bowl ring.
Played more than four down.
And he loves vaccines.
And he loves vaccines.
Also, second counterpoint: ever since I got the gay autism vaccine, I have literally shed pounds.
Right?
I'm in the best shape since the peak.
Are you on Ozempic?
No.
That was drama.
Okay.
If I was on Ozempic, brother, I would have lost all the weight way faster.
Yeah, if I was on Ozempic, you guys would fucking know it.
Last video.
It would not have taken me two years.
This is maybe one of the most famous.
Okay.
This is dangerous Russell Wilson on his girlfriend who would later be left for Sia.
What does Sia mean?
His wife.
His wife, yeah.
Left for Sia.
Like, that's her name.
Oh.
Like, he didn't mean like he left for Sia.
Like, Sia, like the chandelier singer.
No, no, is it Sia?
Wait.
I don't think he.
I don't think Russell Wilson is the Sia, this chandelier singer.
That's beautiful.
You really hit that C.
I don't think that's who he's married to.
Yeah, yeah.
No, Siara.
Sorry.
Oh, fuck.
He's dyslexic.
So Siara, like one, two, step, Siara.
Yeah.
It'd be pretty funny if he left for Cia.
Siara?
I'm sorry.
I'm just like.
Is it seriously the same one that did one two step?
Let me pull it up.
I don't listen to her music, but I know he's married to her.
It'd be pretty funny if Russell Wilson.
It'd be pretty funny if Russell Wilson married this.
Yeah, that would be a very different story.
Okay, play the video.
It is.
It is.
Oh, nice.
So this is his girlfriend who he would marry, but everybody kind of knew on draft night.
See if you can identify his girlfriend is.
All right, we're going to zoom out here a little bit.
Hold on.
Let's go, baby.
Oh, geez.
74% of the MC.
Master in all things.
That's my nightmare.
My nightmare is my boyfriend gets into the draft and I make a weird ass face on the video.
This is my new nightmare.
Well, don't worry.
Your boyfriend's not getting drafted for nothing.
Maybe the military.
Nah, his ass is too much.
We should do military drafts like this.
You're at home.
Here go with your family.
It's like the army.
Thanks, Coach.
I'm ready.
No, I just wanted to share with you guys because I know you're not huge football folks, you two, but the draft is pretty excellent.
It's like a little glimpse into the athletes' nights, and it gets you excited because you get into the parasocial element of like, this guy's on my team.
Well, I never thought of that.
It's like so changing.
It's cool too.
Like, their lives are changing.
Once, yeah, once you, it's over, you're, it's over.
Yo.
If you're in a relationship and the guy, yeah, it's over.
Do you think so?
Yeah.
No, I mean, it's not a for sure.
It's not a for sure.
Okay.
Yeah, because there's some that go in married.
Like the Vikings drafted a guy, JJ McCarthy.
He's married with a wife and everything.
Well, people, people also do this when they're like famous.
Like, no, like Jeremy Allen White was like a dipshit.
Like left his wife and kid.
Barry Dickslinger, Coke Kyogan or whatever his name is, left his wife and kid.
Wait, Barry Keegan's not gay.
No, he's with Sabrina Carpenter.
I'll be honest.
If I win an Academy Award, I gotta fuck around.
No.
I mean, Will's got a good point.
He's not gay at all.
No, not even a little bit.
He looks like a lesbian woman.
Like, I thought he's a girl.
You are such.
You're a bitter little bitch.
You know what?
For how progressive you are, it's so crazy how you have these tastes.
He's not even six foot.
Bro, he looks like he's kind of a wait.
Did you know, like, from the jump that he wasn't gay?
Yes.
Wait, he.
That actually makes the Salburn shit genuinely impressive.
How you, what?
It's not impressive a gay man does it?
Guys, let me explain something, though.
We have to dial back.
Other than the fact that Barry Keegan is not gay.
Barry Keegan actually slurped real cum out of the bathroom.
Obviously, I mean, does he need to be gay?
No, obviously not.
Straight man can slurp cocktails.
Yeah, exactly.
Have you ever gotten high on your own supply?
No.
You ever eaten your own?
I hated that sentence.
Listen, listen, listen.
What?
Have you ever gotten?
I don't know.
That's wild.
Like, that's insane.
I never knew Irish people acted that gay.
Listen, all right.
I'm going to dial something back.
Okay.
When you're super famous, you need to have affairs.
No, so that you can stay in the news cycle.
That's a good point.
That's why they do it.
No, that is not why they do it.
No.
Hold on, Will.
Their publicist comes in and they're like, Barry, you're blue, baby.
You're blowing up, baby.
Wait.
We need to get you a hot toddy affair.
Will, are you saying that most people that get married, because most people that get married aren't famous, they settle?
No, I'm saying that you need to have a spicy affair to make it and people make a single.
Think everybody should have a spicy affair if you win an Academy Award.
I think it's supply and demand.
I think that's the weird thing with fame.
Is also, can only talk about the bitches that all of a sudden Ludwig gets famous because I was with him when he wasn't famous.
Yeah.
All of a sudden, he gets a bunch of viewers, and these motherfucking ladies, not nice, slide in his DMs.
They still do it.
And I'm like, name names, cutie.
Wait, so there's what are they?
What sort of things do they say?
Hi.
Okay, that's benign, right?
Or a head.
A hi with a little smiley face.
Dude, awesome.
Is it a short?
If a girl sends me more than three eyes, she wants to suck down on my dog.
Is that how girls are?
What?
Sorry, I'm still.
I'm literally.
Do we have to do that?
Do they send him like do they send him like lost or do they even worse?
They send him emojis.
Oh, God.
No, no, no.
You know, it's bad when they, it's not emojis.
They type out the smiley face.
No.
That's when you guys know.
Does that mean they're trying to, they're trying to fuck?
Yeah.
Okay.
I'm not being delusional here for the record.
I know when a girl's not flirting when she's just saying, hey, but like, if I told you the names, you'd be like, oh.
Yeah.
Anyway, but there's tell us the names after stream.
I can do that.
There's been a few.
And there was like another girl at like TwitchCon that like went up to him.
He was like, are there any that we wouldn't expect?
No, I don't think so.
Oh.
We would expect all of them.
Oh, yeah.
We just think everybody's going to be.
Can we take that again?
Can we take that again?
Yeah.
Are there some that we wouldn't expect?
Honest Relationship Advice00:03:23
Yeah.
He's just such a hot command.
I mean he'll be honest, be honest, be honest.
He's tried to fuck Ludwig before, right?
I know.
Okay.
But that is not true.
Like, Austin.
Stop DMing.
He's trying to ever try to fuck you.
You have literally.
You guys are at TwitchCon EU or something.
All of a sudden, in the bathroom, Ludwig's there.
Okay, keep going.
He pushes you up against the wall and says, I'd bottom for you.
Well, it's not happening.
Yeah, but that's, I mean, that's, I mean, I'm in a corner.
I'm backed into a corner at that situation.
I backed into a corner.
If Ludwig, if Ludwig, I mean, yeah, exactly.
I mean, I don't know what I'm supposed to, cutie, with respect.
What am I supposed to say in that situation?
You're in a committed relationship.
Imagine that phone call.
Cutie, I had sex with your boyfriend.
That'd be a wild.
That would be the best pod.
No, Austin wouldn't even tell me.
I'd like find out through somebody else.
Yeah.
To be honest, though, no, Ludwig and I are friends.
You'd find out through the game.
No, I'm going to be honest.
Can I come to his defense?
What?
He might fuck Ludwig, but he would tell you because his kill.
Kill would eat him alive.
He would tell you, you'd tell Caroline.
Caroline would tell me.
No, Austin would tell you.
No.
I would probably just not do it.
No, he would not.
He would do it and he would not tell anyone.
No, I've too much anxiety for that.
I would ask you.
I'm more likely to ask you for permission than I am to.
Cutie, your boyfriend is gay.
Yeah.
But all of this to say, I think like literally people get famous and they start getting like an onslaught of messages and interest and then it's just like new and exciting and then they leave their wife and kids.
You don't think that it's also because like as people become famous, I get the opposite thing, but I also think there is something weird where I think they joined the Illumina Audience.
No, no, no.
You guys know this.
You guys know this.
When you become a public figure, your life, your interests, a lot of things change.
And for certain people, I think it is hard to relate to a partner if they don't have this like jaded worldview now.
And I think that happens to a lot of folks.
No, it's interesting because it's hard to understand the lifestyle of somebody that is in the public eye unless you're in it yourself.
I mean, we're not really in the public.
I mean, you know, relative to like a celebrity.
Well, you're a twink guy.
I mean, that's what people call me.
But, you know, it's different.
It's different.
And you have to, and sometimes it's a little bit of an adjustment.
And the problems that we have are problems nobody wants to hear about.
Yep.
Right.
And sometimes that's difficult in a relationship.
So finding somebody, that's why a lot you see a lot of people dating within the industry.
I think it is infinitely better if you are fortunate enough to fall in love with someone, be in a relationship with someone before you become super successful, especially because that means boba yapa.
Oh my God, he's just trying to get my attention while I'm trying to talk over here.
What'd he do?
Did he moon you?
No, he's just trying to like flip me off.
No, he's not mooning me.
He's trying to flip me off.
That would be so cool.
But like Turkey style is doing this.
Your dad is fucking funny.
Okay, let's just get back to it.
XQC Slur Controversy00:09:12
I was making a good point.
God damn it.
I don't know if you were.
I think it's good.
No, I think if you're very for a lot of people don't realize it, but like you're very fortunate that you met someone that likes you for who you are and not for your status or whatever the fuck else you bring to the table.
Not to say that that's the only thing that people care about when you are famous, but like it's definitely not that because you were broke when you met this person.
So you're actually in the best possible scenario because neither of you guys were shit when you started dating Ludwig.
And now you're both.
I was waiting on my peak.
Yeah, she was famous.
Okay, both of you guys were nowhere near as famous as you guys were.
And also you have the benefit of being a woman.
I was literally gapping both of you.
I was clearing both of you.
I was like, who Omega Laws, left and right?
Who the fuck are these guys?
No, I was on your, I was trying to date you when they were on Love Hall.
Remember, when they met you, I was building your career.
I recall.
It was terrifying.
That's also true.
Anyway, the point I was trying to make is that like then you don't have any you don't have any confusion about why this person was with you.
Ludwig only dates me for my money and I know it.
And my double D's.
Yeah, you'd sick.
Yeah.
Did you guys not understand that?
Did you not feel that?
It's a Patrick Mahomes situation, him and Brittany.
But that's the worst.
They're like high school.
That's the worst.
Why?
Is there drama?
I know nothing about them.
No, I mean, like, he's great.
He's awesome.
Okay.
Candy Powers, baby.
There's another Steph Curry.
Isn't his high school sweetheart?
Steph.
She's a gospel.
Yeah.
They have beautiful, awesome kids.
Yeah, I'm just trying to think of people that are like, you know, took the LeBron James.
Well, I don't think.
Didn't he cheat on his wife?
Never.
He would never do that.
My goat would.
My goat would not do that.
Oh.
And all of the things that people say that he has cheated, this white supremacy talking.
Oh.
Yeah, that's right.
It's racism.
It's racism.
That's what it is.
Okay, let's move on from this topic.
Let's move away from LeBron Haight.
Stop LeBron Hay.
I don't think he's hate.
I don't hate him.
Austin, what?
I'm sad because you need your clips.
We have a few more minutes left in this episode.
I haven't talked a lot this episode, which is totally fine.
I think people needed me to be silent.
No.
Silence is violence, Austin.
They needed me to be silent.
Why do they need that?
Because now they'll have to find a new problem.
I've got a few topics.
Okay.
I didn't have.
We lost Marsh.
Yeah, he's not here.
I've been checking the time.
What's going on?
Are you all right?
I don't think he's well.
I don't think he's good.
Podcast.
I'm the producer now.
I can see the button.
I'll push the button.
He's with Fifi.
This is stupid.
These are dumb topics.
Austin, I'm just trying to give you, you get your.
Austin, give us a dumb topic right now.
Give me a dumb topic right now.
I wrote down there's an entire nude cruise.
Austin, that's not how you do topics.
You say, you say, have you guys heard about this entire nude on the this is another airport related topic?
Oh, I'm going to kill myself.
She's laughing.
Laughing from the couch.
Oh, oh, oh.
I got XQC.
I got some drama.
XQC recently got called the F-slur by one of his friends within the kick community for kissing me.
Evidently, he was in a call with a bunch of people and somebody showed a photo of XQC.
We can probably pull it up in post because he's not here.
But there's a photo.
There's a photo of XQC kissing me.
Don't fuck it up, please.
And he gets called the F slur.
And then there's like this, all this drama, and people are trying to investigate whether XQC is gay or not.
And what's crazy is through all of this drama, I never got called the F slur.
Right.
Throughout the whole thing.
Wait, oh, your drama is that they're not calling you the F-slur?
I don't want them to call me the F-Slur, but it's wild.
You kind of want them to call you the F-slur.
No, no, no.
I don't want them to call me the F-slur.
I'm just saying that that's, it's just crazy that the gay guy didn't get called the F-slur.
Swap out, swap out, swap out.
That's not the right photo.
Was that you and XQC?
Cutie, that was phenomenal.
Thank you.
Thank you.
That was not.
Congratulations.
But anyway, yeah, the drama is.
Well, the drama isn't that I wasn't called the F-Slur, but it is interesting.
I Googled it.
And I wasn't able to be the F Slur.
Do you think you weren't called the F-slur because you are actually gay?
No, I think they just didn't care about shitting on him.
I think we need to take this F-slur.
I think we need to take the word back, as we have, and we need to use it for homophobes.
Why is my armpits on your front page?
So we need to take.
We need to take.
That's anti-Piker.
What the fuck, Hassan?
Yeah, you.
My armpits kind of look like vaginas.
Oh, fuck.
Pull that back up.
Oh.
No, don't pull my pits up.
You're just like vaginas.
Hassan Piker's armpits.
Looks like a vagina.
Oh, no, baby.
Get back to the F-Slur.
Fuck it.
I don't care.
I thought it was.
I thought it was.
Just admit it.
Do you miss XQC?
No, I don't care.
Do you miss his luscious moves?
Huh?
Do you miss his lush?
I don't care.
F-slur, whatever.
I think it's...
Austin's just over.
I think it's kind of funny that XQC and I guess like...
You're hot, too.
It's wonderful watching like stupid fucking subreddits like decide on a whim as soon as like a couple of their favorite content creators turn on certain topics, change their attitude dramatically.
Like now, I guess DiVorcelli and XQC both are anti-like homophobia and transphobia.
So LSF is now all like, yeah, these guys are fucking so stupid and they hate trans people.
Like, look how dumb they are.
And XQC actually did a phenomenal job.
As a matter of fact, I can't believe I'm saying this.
Defending trans rights against Aiden Ross, which is, you know, not the boldest or bravest or most intelligent interlocutor, but still, you know, the conversation was had.
And now all the juicers are pro-trans.
But I have a fantasy, and it's me being called the F-Slur.
Not being called the F-sler.
Like, that'd be a horrible thing to happen.
But it's, and I'm not a confrontational or violent person.
But if I got called the F-Sler, the fantasy is to beat the shit out of that person and spit on them and then call them the F-sler.
Wow.
Back.
I don't know why my response to homophobia is to be more homophobic to that person.
Dude, creator boxing.
You versus whoever says it.
The F-Sler?
Yeah.
I mean, that would be...
And I would come out and whoop their ass in pride shorts.
That would be funny.
I mean, that's pretty sick.
Yeah, you know how they have the nickname across the belt for a box.
Yours just says bussy.
Or the F-word.
Wait, that's awesome.
Yeah.
I actually, I may do that.
Just no punching in the face.
Wait, I wonder if Aiden wants to fight.
I don't think Aiden wants to fight.
You would have to cut a lot of weight.
I think.
You think so?
Yeah, I think he's a lot tinier than you.
I don't weigh that much.
I weigh like 158.
I bet you'd have to get it.
Him and I probably weigh the same.
I'm guessing.
Austin wants to box.
He doesn't have the same amount of muscle, but him and I definitely weigh the same.
For sure.
I like that.
Yeah.
Okay, we're at an hour.
Hey, guys, I have an announcement for the Patreon because I want to service the patrons.
I'm starting a new segment on the Patreon.
What?
Yeah.
I want to service the patrons.
It's Austin.
No, no, no.
Say it like that.
Austin is going to service you.
All the Patriots are going to get in the lawn.
So on the Patreon, we're going to drop a phone number that you can call and you can leave messages and I will be answering and listening to your voicemails with one or myself of our crew.
We're going to do a cell phone number.
We're going to do this.
Hold on.
I'm trying.
Oh my God.
I'm trying.
I'm trying.
Hello?
I like it.
Okay.
I'm going to listen to and answer voicemails of those on the Patreon with myself and hopefully one of these co-hosts.
I'll do it.
Okay, we'll do it.
We'll do it once a week.
Yeah.
We'll rotate.
Thanks, guys.
We'll see you in the Patreon.
Bye.
Peace.
Patreon Voicemail Segment00:00:45
No, I once fucked so hard I passed out.
There you go.
Mid-sex.
Because I was like late teens and I was a really girl that I wanted to impress.
And she just, she did this.
She was like, keep going, keep going, keep going, keep going.
And I was like really past the threshold.
It was hot.
It was summer in Princeton.
And I just dropped.
Fainted.
Did you finish?
No, I fainted.
But I know you got back up.
You got back on the horse.
Oh, I got back on the horse.
I know you did.
I know you got back on the horse.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course.
Judy, have you ever nutted so hard you cramped up?