Marsh and Cutie dissect the Streamer Awards, recounting Ludwig's shoe ad incident that chipped Marsh's tooth and criticizing Maximilian's botched audio. They debate XQC's absence due to missing RCPs, analyze gender dynamics in comedy, and address venue chaos where a flooded urinal forced attendees into general admission. The hosts also confront last-minute cancellations, interpersonal drama over dinner exclusions, and chaotic pet interactions, ultimately questioning the event's production quality while teasing future merchandise drops and Dune 2 premiere plans. [Automatically generated summary]
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
|
Time
Text
Internal Drama and Shoes00:02:02
You should start.
Ladies and gentlemen, back again, back again.
The Fear End podcast, but this time after the year's most anticipated, most viewed, most celebrated event, the Streamer Awards.
Hell yeah.
Hell yeah.
Unfortunately.
Are you on him?
Unfortunately, not a lot of drama occurred this year at the Streamer Awards, which is unfortunately for us and the podcast that gave me Cinderella obviously does not care about even remotely, even a little bit.
Because if she did, she would have made some drama fucking happen.
I was so close to just the Patreon thing.
Oh, no, I'm going to get there.
Oh, there is drama internally in this.
There's drama in this pocket.
Oh, yeah.
He's a lot of drama.
There was just not enough drama at the Streamer Awards, which is like the first thing that I think is like fucked up of you.
Should I just, should I have like been like, Streamer of the Year goes to Austin show.
Vegito.
Like, I just choose like.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
Spice it up.
He'll yell at you so that we can talk about it and like then, you know, eyeballs on the fucking.
There was not enough drama.
I actually thought at one point I was just going to attack you on stage.
Yeah.
I was going to say slurs.
Yeah.
On camera.
Ludd did attack Austin.
Yes.
There was drama.
Ludwig while he was showing me his shoe.
While he was doing an ad placement, by the way, for his shoe, lifted his shoe up intentionally, kicked the microphone into my tooth and shipped my tooth.
Wait, actually?
I sustained very, it's a very bad injury.
You can see at one point in the broadcast, Austin, cut this in, Marsh, is beat red.
Yeah.
Like he is red as the sun.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Because he is trying to deal with the fact that he's just been kicked in the face and thinks that his body doesn't know how bad, badly chipped his tooth is.
So he's even talking.
He's even talking like this all day.
He's like doing like the long note because he's just fucking.
It was bad.
Yeah.
It was bad, bro.
But you know what?
Vintage Studs and Bad Injuries00:03:06
But I looked in the mirror.
It was all good.
Everybody, the producers were checking.
You know what's crazy?
I heard this.
I don't know if the camera picked it up.
I don't know if the camera picked it up.
He said the F-slur.
He quietly, like while he was kicking you, he said it.
Honestly, I wish I would have heard it.
Would have turned me on.
God, you are so horny for Ludwig.
Oh, my God, bro.
I would have lost it.
This is a problem.
You were trying to say it harder.
I don't know how you like this problem.
I don't like saying harder.
I don't know.
I don't know how you can say it harder.
Look at his lips.
What is wrong with you?
He's just, he is just effortlessly sexy.
I remember a time when he used to talk about us like that.
I know.
We're old potatoes.
No, you're not.
You're not old.
We're your old flings.
We're your old flings.
It's fine.
You forgot about it.
We're yesterday's news.
No, no.
I still think about you guys, but we've been friends for so long.
It would just be weird.
All right, let's be divisive and cause drama.
Judy, who was the best dressed of the three of us?
It's not even a question.
It was you.
Well, it was you.
I was.
That's not even remotely drama.
He was wearing a silver bow tie.
The worst thing I've ever seen.
It was atrocious.
It was the worst thing I've ever worn to a life.
I wish you smelled bad.
Why don't I hire a stylist?
I don't know.
Every year you complain about it.
I wish you had a colour you wear with us.
I should have.
I blew the budget on this year's last year when I spent $8,000 on a shirt.
You spent $0 because you gave it back.
Well, no, no, no.
I exchanged it for another.
You guys want to hear something funny?
Yeah.
So I bought vintage shirt studs from Polo with the intention of giving them to my dad, which I have now.
But they were so vintage that when I pulled them out of the packaging, they made no sense to me.
They were just a hoop.
Oh my God.
And I was like, how do these work?
I've done the screw ones.
I've done the pin ones.
And I called my guy at Polo and I was like, dude, I have no idea how these vintage studs go in.
And there was like a long pause and he's like, I am so sorry.
I've never seen studs like that before in my life.
I have no idea what you do with them.
So when I got in my Uber, I was late.
I told you I had an outfit emergency.
It was, it was my call time.
I'm late.
And I'm with my shirt wide open in the Uber.
If you don't see it on YouTube researching vintage shirt studs.
And I found out that this was a cutter pin stud, which is a very rare stud.
And underneath the lining of the container, there were these like metal springs that you wrapped around.
And then I used the temporary lining of the shirt to create a ribbon as a backing.
So I was literally like nude in the Uber with my YouTube trying to figure out these shirt studs as I was going through this.
But you did figure it out.
I did at the very last second.
You pulled it off.
Pulled it out.
Typical.
Yeah, you looked phenomenal.
You did.
I told the hair and makeup people, they said, how do you want your hair?
I said, Farah Fawcett.
Oh, they slid.
Rare Cuts and PR Tours00:15:11
They slang.
They killed it.
I was saying, you've been on Propetia for so long that you've grown more hair than you ever genetically were.
I have like X-Men hair.
I can feed myself.
Yeah, literally.
Yeah.
Like you've crossed, you've beaten all of your genetic barriers.
Do you think the show itself, like when you're sitting there watching it, is it too long?
Did it cut you off?
This year it was a bit long, I think.
I felt actually it was shorter than last year.
It was longer.
Maybe because I was working.
Yeah, you were working at this other one.
I was like, I was like, I was on the red carpet first.
I'm just going to be honest with you.
It was a long day.
I think.
But that's just because of the red carpet.
I felt the same way last year as well.
But as someone who didn't do the red carpet and just watched the show, I think it was a little bit longer.
I think we should do Roses and Thorns.
For me, food was excellent this year.
Food was really good.
Food was excellent.
I thought the performances, oh my God, Baby No Money.
Oh, good.
Beating on that performance.
It was unreal, incredible.
And so Harry Mack was really good too.
Harry Mack was incredible.
I didn't really understand the Fortnite one, but that's not for me.
I'm not the target audience, I think.
I thought that was all great.
Thorns, for me, my biggest thorn, whoever botched the Maximilian dude video should write you a check.
I'm going to be real.
Of a million.
Should write you a check for whatever, for a good percentage of what they were paid.
Because Maximilian, I'm going to say this.
He's so gracious.
He's so professional.
He did not bat an eye.
I was looking at him the whole time.
He was just staring there glowingly watching the video, even as it cut to elevator music.
But in my mind, I was like, I love this dude.
This entire room of people loves this dude.
I mean, dude, Double Entente is his name.
And the internet loves this dude.
And I wanted to see that video.
I know.
It was a good idea.
That was my biggest.
Yeah.
And my editor worked so hard on it.
If you watched, luckily the camera didn't pick this up, but I'm in the background because I had a voice of God that I was talking to.
And I was like, what the fuck is like, I was.
Yeah, what happened with the audio?
I still don't have an answer.
I have no clue.
Was that the production company that dropped that?
I don't want to point fingers.
I'm not really sure.
Well, we won't point fingers unless they don't write a check for partial amount back to QDC.
It was devastating, though.
It was the only thing I like cried about.
I worked so hard on that.
As a production company, you cannot drop the ball on your keynote because the Lifetime Achievement Award is kind of like that keynote moment that we can all come together on.
It was beautiful.
Everyone loved it.
My speech was beautiful.
Your speech was beautiful.
Ultimately, ultimately, though, like despite those problems, I think overall it was still a really good event.
I thought it was a nice thing.
I did send him the video.
As soon as I sent Max the video, he was able to react to it on stream.
I was nice.
He's such a pro.
He didn't even bat knock it.
I know.
I think he was like, really.
I just feel awful.
I think he was really stoked to be put up for it to begin with.
Yeah, I don't know.
I mean, the video I sent over has sound.
So I don't know what happened.
I don't know if the export.
No, it might have been a good idea.
It might have been an X sound or a code anyway.
I know.
I don't know what I don't like playing videos.
And sometimes it's funny because the biggest feedback, people are like, well, did you test it?
Yes, many times.
Yeah.
I promise.
It was played in the.
That's frustrating.
And then the other thing is, I don't know.
I think the venue needs to write you a check, too.
Bathrooms.
Okay.
Well, this is the crazy thing.
Oh, drama.
This is drama.
This is the crazy thing with the venue.
It was a urinal flood.
Sir and I were there as it was happening the first time.
Somebody shit in the urinal.
Okay.
Somebody shit in the urinal.
Someone shit in the urinal.
The funniest thing is that I forget who it was started the rumor that it was quackity.
It was not quackity.
We can confirm quackity did not shit in the urinal.
I think it was Nandre that was like talking about the shit in the urinal.
Yeah.
Well, and people keep finding these clips of like quackity leaving the bed.
And daily dose, I think, was like, it was quackity.
And everybody believes it.
Quackity, the nicest guy in the whole time.
There's not a nicer person you could frame.
Since the fugitive, there hasn't been such an increase in it.
Yeah, I'm not sure.
So the urinals were all on the floor and they started to overfill and fill the tile a little bit.
With pee?
With pee.
But the problem was they shut it down.
And to be honest, they shouldn't have shut it down.
They should have still let us use the saws.
Okay, there's a little pee-pee on the floor.
I can deal because it was so preferable.
You know what they made us do?
They shut everything down and they made us go into GA, which I don't mind.
But I almost missed my award because I was taking pictures and signing autographs.
And I literally heard over the loudspeaker as I'm signing off.
I know I looked around and I was like, And the winner is name your price.
And I went, I'm sorry, guys, that's my award.
And I just went, fucking ran him up.
Yeah, I ran from the atrium.
I know.
I was looking for you.
I was like, I was looking for you when they said, well, first of all, I was looking for you when they came out on stage to announce.
Like, I was looking for you.
You were nowhere to be found.
I knew if we won, you would be there.
Yeah.
When I saw you, and I was just waiting for you to appear, or I would have gotten on the microphone and waited until you got on stage.
What's that like winning an award?
You won last.
Yeah.
Shut up.
This guy needs some every year.
What's that?
What's that like?
I don't know.
Let me tell you.
Was it good?
Did it feel good?
Let me tell you.
I've got the award right here.
And Will also is getting a trophy because this is an equal.
This is a 50-50.
I should get like a little baby one for being in the trailer and being in every episode, pretty much.
Well, look, you know what?
It's not about you right now.
It's about us.
It's about me.
We should get like a participation, like a smaller one, maybe without the host of name your price.
Will Melfanosta?
I actually inadvertently won two because I won Ludwig's Dodgeball event.
We were all there.
I feel like such an asshole because like you guys are, you guys are like, I'm so happy I won.
I'm like, I wish you didn't.
Yeah, no, she told me that.
She's like, I wish you didn't win.
Yeah, I know.
But no.
How close did I come on just chatting?
Last place?
Was that last place?
You're not a lot.
I can't say.
That's a long pause.
I have a hard time.
I push for you.
I push for you pretty hard.
Here's the thing.
Moist Critical said it best for me the first year.
These guys winning is my worst case scenario.
Ludwig winning is my worst case scenario, right?
Like these are like, but if I touch it, I touch it.
I don't want to touch it.
So I just don't fucking touch it.
So I, you know, and you go with it.
I think you're all very talented.
I do.
I genuinely do.
No, I do.
Like, of course.
But it's like.
We don't hear that enough from you.
Bless your heart.
We deserve it, though.
But, and sometimes I've always seen people do that.
Like, release the numbers, release the numbers.
And I was like, I'll tell you what, some of these categories are not close.
And I would feel bad releasing the numbers because I think it just like, I think then it goes from this positive thing of somebody winning and three other people getting recognized to being like, what the fuck?
No one like, even though like four people getting recognized is a massive and amazing and achievement of its own.
But then if you release those numbers, people might start being like, of course you only got like, then it turns into a negative thing.
And it's just like, that's not what I'm trying to do.
So well, she's only saying this because she doesn't want people to know how little people voted for me for just chatting.
That's what it is.
No, that's not it.
I didn't even, you know, I didn't even vote this year.
We know.
You didn't?
I don't think I pushed for Name Your Prize more than you did.
And more than even Will did.
Well, Will tweeted.
I didn't push in.
I was kind of surprised, especially.
I was shocked.
I will tweet.
I rode for Name Your Price.
I was trying to do a little PR tour.
It fell short.
I had to rehearse for In the Tub with Austin Show.
Oh.
And no, no, no, no.
You took a bath.
I did take.
I literally.
So we did do a rehearsal for Name Your Price, and it was just me taking or not Name Your Price in the Tub for Austin's show.
You just made someone film you taking a bath.
Yeah.
The whole thing was me getting the lighting right to see if my abs and face look good.
And it was like a catch tornado.
So you made a sex tape.
It wasn't good, but I'm premiering the show.
It's coming out.
Was your first guest?
Ms. Kiff.
Wow.
When did you get in the tub with Ms. Kiff?
I'm going to.
Oh, so you haven't done it?
I mean, it's going to be live in Austin.
I'm going to Austin.
Boston.
Oh.
So, yeah.
Yeah.
I'm going to do that.
I'm going to get in the tub with him.
So, yeah.
Well, it was a great show, Cutie.
It was a fantastic show.
We all enjoyed it.
It was a great show.
And thank you because truly, like, did everyone enjoy it?
Maybe, maybe some people were.
Maybe some people didn't.
Were you mad at my joke?
I was nervous.
Both of you.
I was nervous about my joke.
Wait, I got named.
I thought, I wish you would have taken more shots at me.
Well, no, it was great.
You were nominated.
Oh, you were nominated.
Oh, my God.
Hello.
If anybody thinks she played favorites, no, I think at this point, please use this as a dispute.
She does not give a shit.
At this point, I feel like, like, I don't even, cutie just hates us.
No, I don't.
You promoted Fioran podcast zero times.
Well, it's being promoted right now on your stream to a total of 2,000 viewers.
Do you blame me?
Everybody has left.
No, no, it's so much cooler when you do it.
There was 20,000 watching.
Yes, after, and then they all saw it.
It's so much cooler when you promote it like that instead of like in front of 600,000.
Okay, but here's the deal.
Cutie, we are broke.
We are broke.
Stop it.
We are broke.
Stop.
We need money.
Stop.
Stop.
I offered.
We talked about it on this podcast.
I said, do you guys want to film an ad?
And you guys be like, ads and cringe.
No, I thought it was a good idea.
No, you didn't.
No one said that.
Was I on vacation?
No, no.
Marsh, do you remember this?
Was I on vacation?
I think you remember I offered, though.
Wait, I think I said that.
I said absolutely whatever you need from us.
I would have done everything.
I said no.
Are you ad to be a bad person?
No, we did not.
Cutie.
I need someone to find it.
Cutie, cutie.
We said shit on it.
Cutie, we didn't want to pay for it.
I wasn't going to make you pay for it.
I said we would.
Remember, I offered our phone.
And then I told him we can't afford it.
We're not paying for it.
I made a joke about Hassan having to pay for it.
And I said, yeah, let's do it.
Yeah, let's do it.
I did not pay for it.
No, okay.
To be, to be, okay.
Well, number one, it didn't do shit.
What?
I had three wine about ads and two shout outs for the wine about pictures.
Because they're misogynistic, but we have there's we're men, yeah.
But the gold, yeah, you could have actually benefited from it if you weren't trying to support stupid women.
Sapphire award, how about Schlong Award?
Yes, it was my big, deepest load, hardest dog, yeah.
That would have been a biggest cock.
Thickest rope award, thickest rope award will not clear.
No, I do.
I have really good ropes, I have really good roads.
I don't know about you.
I had a pretty amazing uplift women, and you try and uplift people, and they just hate you for it.
Yeah, men, thickest ropes, we're there.
Yeah, Damon Goggins is on Joe Rogue, honestly.
Finally, it would be touching because it's like, oh, finally, like men get recognition.
Yeah, that would be this is satire, please.
For those of you at home, this is a fucking joke.
No, it's not.
No, no one, no one, no one, yeah, no one cares about men.
Like, yeah, we honestly fucked up.
We seriously need more, which is why I think you should have a male co-host.
No, on wine about it, yes.
I agree.
No, you say, climb the ladder till the stream awards is on his channel.
Look, oh, okay, I saw something today.
Pokemon was phenomenal.
I have another thing.
I just want to say it should be finished.
Go ahead.
We only got 300 Patreons from all of those.
That's what I was trying to say.
Okay, don't say that.
Now, advertisers are not going to advertise.
Well, I'm just saying, like, it's well, for the Patreon, I think, Patreon.
You know what?
Never mind.
We got so many.
Yeah, we should cut that part out.
She made $3 million.
But the reason I shill whine about it is I make 50% and I needed to pay for this fucking show.
And 50% is more than 20%.
So that's a 20% of a much larger number.
Yeah, is it?
Not if, not if it isn't.
Well, I was thinking.
Yeah.
What?
Yeah.
Yeah, you get 100%.
You can wine about it for this one.
You make more on wine about it than this.
Yeah.
Wait.
Thank you, Marsh.
Wait, not by a lot.
Yeah.
Yeah.
10, 15k more.
That's a lot.
Yeah.
Dude, we were slagging.
Don't do fucking ads.
Yes, because you don't speak woman.
Yeah.
Yes.
I'm going to start.
You know, Judy Estrogen is fucking everything up.
Okay.
I will say one thing, though.
I saw a clip of you riffing with Maya on Wine About It about like women's suffrage and like how ladies like you need to get more gifts on Valentine's Day.
And you were fucking on your A game.
Yeah, I'm funny.
And you're way funnier on Wine About It than you are here.
You guys can't do it.
And it's really fucked up.
It's really fucked up.
I saw it.
No, no, that's because, okay, this is the difference.
I'm on wine about it.
I'm talking to Maya and I'm like, do you think Kaya's pussy is as big as mine?
And she's like, I don't know.
I say to you guys, you guys, like, ew.
Well, that's.
I'm not going to lie.
That's insane.
I can't believe that.
No, no, no.
If that is your baseline that you want me to rip on Kaya's pussy, I am out.
March, March, can you find fucking dogs, but you guys don't.
Can you find the clip?
Because like, this is literally like, no, it's, it's fun.
She's like my daughter.
I'm not going to talk about her pussy.
Marsh, no, you can't.
Marsh, no, you can't.
Marsh, pull up Kaya's pussy on Google.
I'm telling you, like, watching her rip with Maya and then and then comparing it to like her Kaya dog pussy comment here.
It is your beat.
It is your beat is alarming.
It's alarming.
The difference is alarming.
So what was the conclusion did you guys come to?
I haven't talked to Maya about Kaya's vagina.
Oh, you haven't?
I thought you did.
No, because she preached the fucking end game.
It's a lot of troll shit.
She knows that that is.
She's in the lab cooking up beef.
No, I believe in the yes and, you know, Improv Master.
I'm a yes ander, and I say whatever comes to my mind, and Maya never shuts it down.
But you guys will sometimes be like, What the fuck are you saying?
I think sometimes you need to be shut down.
Well, there's your problems.
That's why I don't adventure.
Kitty, you're trying to become me.
Wait, what?
Yes, and yes, yes.
What do you mean by that?
I'm just saying you're becoming like you're saying crazy shit.
Austin, you don't say crazy shit.
You just complain and talk about it.
What are you talking about?
You said, remember the vagina?
The pussy?
The dog pussy?
Yeah, that was crazy.
Why have you ever said that's equivalent to anything that crazy, Austin?
You crazy.
Do you hate American Airlines?
Yes And Crazy Shit00:02:52
What are you talking about?
Austin's craziest experience is like, oh, I met an old woman at the fucking airport and we had a wonderful time.
How did I turn this on myself?
No, because you tried to be me.
I don't know.
No, it wasn't me.
Are you offended?
I'm a great person.
You've never had like 10% as crazy as QD story.
Why wouldn't you want to be me?
No, I would love to be you.
I'd be so fit and I would get laid so often.
You are fit.
No, I'm not.
You'll get laid so often.
I do get laid often.
I knew he'd like that.
Yeah.
Okay.
Jesus Christ, dude.
You remember the dog pussy?
You mean the thing that we were talking about 10 seconds ago?
No, it's just like, I love that that's your A game.
That's your A game.
No, you know why that's not your A game?
Because you fucking cook up all the best shit for whine about it.
I've seen it.
Dude, I don't even make a list.
Can I say something?
Yes.
Whine about it?
You go in with segments.
Here you just come and drop.
You dump trauma.
You come in there.
All of a sudden you'll be like, yeah, when I was 16, this guy took me on a date and then made out with my friend.
And I still can't talk for that.
And we're like, what?
Oh, my God.
Oh, she's calling Maya.
Oh, my.
Oh, here we go.
Here we go.
You're calling.
Oh!
You're friends.
You're friends.
We would pick up instantaneously.
Call me.
Call me.
I'll answer.
I think she's on an aeroplane.
Oh, okay.
Sure.
Yeah, that's why it rang out.
Let me, I'm checking.
Wait, she's on an airplane.
If she picks this up, I'll die.
Yeah, she's on an airplane.
I can see her location.
Oh, my God.
I don't know if she's on the plane yet, but no, it says an hour ago, LAX.
Yeah, she's on the plane.
She's probably really angry.
I'm so sorry.
You know what?
Well, you know, we're your friends.
No, no.
I like to say, I would answer.
You know, the way I know you don't watch whine about it is because Maya and I have multiple episodes where it's just trauma dumping back and forth and then being like, well, that was a depressing episode.
And also, we don't go with any segments.
We just talk.
And that's why I talk about such crazy shit.
You know, I don't talk about crazy shit here because you never shut the fuck up.
You do jiggle at that.
But you do talk about crazy shit here.
You just said, I don't.
No, it's happening.
You know, you talk about crazy shit.
You don't talk about fun stuff.
I'm going to draw the line here.
I think they're being unfair.
And I think you're great on this podcast.
No, thank you guys.
Trauma Dumping on Planes00:06:14
Thank you so much.
No, no, that wasn't even.
I pretty much were great on the podcast.
She's shuddering you.
Okay.
I will say it.
I got to clear the elephant in the room or point to the elephant in the room.
I don't fucking know what you say.
Okay.
No, no.
Yeah, this turned into everybody thinking we called them fat last night.
Okay, okay.
I think cutie is in a noticeably better mood now that the event is over.
Yes.
Yes.
I think you a weight has been lifted.
You had that.
You came in with you are riffing.
We're riffing a lot with that.
Your shit was mid, kind of.
That glow is your shit was mid.
It's back.
It's not mid anymore.
Just get out of the shower.
Oh my God.
She's not wet.
You're not noticeably wet today.
She's not that damn.
She's not that damn.
Oh my God.
You know what?
Cutie, you don't look like you just got out of the shower.
You look like you just got out of the salon.
Crazy.
I haven't, I haven't showered since yesterday.
And this is my makeup and hair from yesterday.
Keep it, Queen.
Keep it.
This is, you look beautiful.
Great.
I also smell awful.
I don't smell you.
I can't smell you at all.
How do I smell?
My mother said that you looked phenomenal.
Thank you.
She also said that you shouldn't have changed dressed.
She said the first dress was the best.
I know.
She was like, the first dress was so beautiful.
The other ones were a little pedestrian.
Thank her for the feedback.
She was so complimentary.
My mother said, That cutie Cinderella is a very pretty girl.
Thank you.
My mother's looking at me.
My mother did not watch this.
What did your mother say?
My mother said, Oh my God, I think Cutie Cinderella is prettier than anyone else.
And also, I think her dresses were not pedestrian.
That's what she said.
It was weird.
But you agreed the first dress was a knockout.
Yeah.
It was fine.
I think they were all fine.
Your first dress was amazing.
I wanted to wear, I wanted to just wear a suit jacket dress.
Ooh.
For my because for my stand-up segment, because I don't, I don't, you know, people don't, it's this thing in comedy where people don't laugh at pretty girls.
It's like, it's like, you've talked about it.
But people tell, people tell you that.
So when I did stand-up, I remember like one of my coaches or somebody, this guy I was talking to, he was like, whatever you do, I won't even wear makeup.
And so when I did stand-up, I had my hair in a messy bun.
I was just wearing a big t-shirt.
Yep.
And like, I don't know.
My one of my improv teachers, it was Allison, amazing person over at Ground Links.
There was a very buxom woman.
And she was like, What are you doing?
Tape those hoo-has down.
Like, men are just going to track those.
They're not going to hear your lines.
Yeah.
So that was the first time I heard it.
And I was like, I was like 25 at the time.
And I was like, really?
Yeah.
She's like, oh, yeah.
Well, and I study a lot of, because I don't know if this is interesting to anybody, but I female comedians, there's only like a few routes you can go with it.
Yeah.
Like that people will actively respond to.
And I've always been similar to like a Chelsea Handler delivery myself, like my voice and everything because I don't have a nice, airy, light, happy voice.
So before the show, I watched all of Chelsea Handler's monologues.
You're better than Chelsea.
To match that.
But if even if you look at Chelsea Handler's outfits, every single thing, they're so basic.
They're so plain.
Cause you're not supposed to.
Your opening monologue killed, though.
Yeah, it was really good.
Phenomenal.
It was really, really good.
This is the first year that I got a lot of input from a lot of people.
Well, no, last year I had two writers and they were great.
And then, of course, I also write a lot for myself for bitches out there that don't think I do.
I write a lot of stuff myself.
On the roast, you wrote all your jokes.
Yeah, but this year I've learned, and I think it comes from a bad place of people being mean, being like, oh, she's, you're not funny.
A girl's not funny.
And then I was like, you know what?
They're going to say that anyway.
So let me, like, I don't need to write all my own shit.
And you might think this is cheesy, but it's like, it comes from like Taylor Swift.
Taylor Swift, somebody said to her, they're like, she doesn't even write good songs.
She has a co-writer.
So then she wrote a whole album by herself.
And they still didn't give her credit.
So it doesn't matter.
Like, so it doesn't matter.
So instead, I was like, I'm just going to make this the best ever.
Slime helped me with some Me, Ben helped me, or you guys don't know Ben.
Ben's great.
His friend Aaron and Squeaks helped me.
And then Squeaks was actually really helpful.
He uh, he, because again, when I tell jokes, I just sound bitchy.
My voice is very bitchy.
And so Squeaks sat with me for at least four hours, and we went over every single joke and my tone on every joke for four hours.
And I got closer.
I'm still not perfect.
My dream voice is actually Caroline's voice.
Huh.
Her stage presence and her voice is like, she's got that theater.
It's mixed with sweet and like, and kind of my voice.
Like, I think Caroline's voice is a baby of mine in Pokemon's.
She's, she's like, she's like sassy, elevated.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And I'm just sassy.
This is this is so interesting to me.
Really?
Yeah.
As like, as a female, what you have to go through in terms of like, I've never thought about like the delivery of my voice.
Yeah.
I mean, the in uh a lot, a lot to comedy is your voice.
Yeah.
Do men do the same thing with comedy in terms of like work on their like voice or is this like strictly like I think I think every joke is an economy of language.
Right.
If if you look at the anatomy of any good joke, if you can tell the same joke and if it's pithy versus if it's drawn out and there's all just kind of word salad, this version of it will always perform better.
So some people have very natural deliveries and they talk about some people's deliveries, how they can make jokes that really aren't even that funny, funny with the naming and those people are the best.
Yeah.
That's like a that's like Kevin Hart.
Kevin Hart has like perfect delivery.
Say what you want about him.
I got you.
Okay, okay.
I understand.
So that's excellent.
I guess I've never done everyone will train it.
What the fuck?
Which one?
It didn't move.
She just suppose I've never done stand-up comedy, so I've never really thought about it.
You get my pants right here.
Anatomy of a Good Joke00:15:16
Come hold my hand, Kaya.
I'm sorry.
They're white.
Yeah, they're nice.
Okay.
I'm sorry.
He's natural.
He's so.
I think everyone needs to work on their voice.
The difference is as a woman, you have like additional hurdles that you have to do.
That's what I was saying.
In the way that you're perceived.
And there's always going to be like that natural barrier of entry, regardless.
Like, I think about my monologue, and I know that if Squeaks would have been saying it, it would have been better.
It wouldn't have been better.
No, it would have.
It just would have.
I don't think it would have been better.
I think it's just like you did a fantastic job.
You did a really good job.
You're entering that self-conscious place where only demons in your mind are fighting.
Damons.
Okay.
What do you rate your overall performance?
Wait, we're supposed to do Rose and Thorns.
What's your roses?
What's my roses?
What's your roses?
Didn't you?
Highlight low light.
Okay.
My roses meeting a bunch of phenomenal people that I never really get to, never really have the opportunity to link up with or even like know all that well.
I talked to Robert Ross.
That was awesome.
Yeah.
We were talking about like Newgrounds.
Oh my God.
Oh my God.
Fiona.
No, it wasn't Kai.
It was Fiona.
Oh my God.
Fiona came in here, ripped ass, and then left.
And walked away.
Oh, Jesus Christ.
And she's wagging her tail.
Like, looking at us.
Fiona.
Oh, that's so bad.
Fiona, get out of here.
That's in my mouth.
I can tell you.
Oh, shit.
I can't believe it.
She's just standing at the door wagging her tail.
You guys can't see.
It's really bad.
Oh, shit.
Yeah, of course they can't see.
It's a fart.
No, they can't see her.
We thought the same thing.
That's the problem.
What would they have to see her waving her tail?
I think I'm going to pass out.
That's really fucked up.
You know what's funny with the Rubber Ross thing?
I didn't realize that I didn't.
Oh, Peefy, you've got to go get a hobby for years on Newgrounds.
On Newgrounds.
And I went up to Rubber Ross afterward and I was like, bro, I didn't put together that I had watched you almost like my entire adolescence.
Yeah.
Because I was a huge Newgrounds head.
And he's like, oh, you were.
And the funniest thing was because he shouted out Newgrounds, Tom Fulp actually sent him a message.
For those of you who know who Tom Fulp is, he's like the creator of Newgrounds.
And I thought that was so cool seeing Tom Fulbright.
That was dope.
I met Pirate Software, who I'm fascinated by as an individual in the space.
I think he's great.
And also Selbit, we're going to Brazil.
Yeah.
And for all of you who said, we're not going to Brazil, fuck you.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You didn't believe me.
Selbit's coming on Name Your Prize.
Wow.
I invited him.
When I was talking about it.
Check out the tweet.
Well, he wanted, he said, you know what he said to me?
He said, anytime you want me on Name Your Prize, he's coming to, he'll come to LA.
He's do it.
Yeah.
I'm surprised he came to that.
I was like, he was like, I would love to see him.
He was the dope.
He's awesome.
He is so cool, so down to earth.
Yeah, he was phenomenal.
One of my favorite people that I met.
Those were my roses.
What's your thorn?
My thorn.
I mean, I don't really, I did not really have a lot of thorns at all.
The event was great overall.
I had a great time.
I guess like taking an L, that's not great.
Yeah, you did take an L.
Yeah, you did.
But you did take an L to the person that also won Streamer of the Year.
So it's kind of just like unlucky orange.
Well, no, I wasn't.
It wasn't even me.
I wasn't even talking about taking an L on myself.
I wanted Will to win.
Did you win the best political streamer award?
We don't, it doesn't exist.
People hate talking about that.
Speaking of thorns, what?
Best podcast next year.
No.
Yes.
Thank you.
Marsh gets me.
No, you get me.
It's not.
We'll start streaming it.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm trying to give you topics that are important.
I think we should do best gay streamer.
No.
Yeah.
What?
Thank you.
Best gay streamer.
That's very brave of you.
I like you.
Thank you very much.
You will never win that.
I will.
I'm going to start streaming this year.
You'll be sorry.
Yeah.
Okay.
You're still not winning.
I'm going to start covering politics.
You'll be sorry.
Okay.
Liberalism is more popular than leftism.
Okay.
There's more Democrats.
Oh, yeah.
That's why Bernie Sanders lost.
Yeah.
Read that bitch.
Yeah.
You're being mean.
Read that bitch to filth.
All right, Rose and Thorne.
Rose, I fucking, can I give a couple roses?
Sure.
Okay.
I loved hosting the floor.
It was so much fun.
I love getting out of the floor.
I knew you were.
It was one of my favorite things.
It was so great.
I loved it.
Second was winning an award.
I've never won an award before.
Yeah.
So that was, that was honest.
I almost started crying.
How does it feel?
Does it feel good?
It feels, I don't know.
It feels amazing.
It does feel like it.
I don't know what it feels like.
You won.
You won.
I didn't.
I didn't.
And truly, I didn't know how.
I didn't think about that I would win, but even when I thought about it, I didn't think that I would feel that way.
And it felt so good.
It was so validating.
So amazing.
I've never won a lot.
First thing I did, texted our manager.
Yes, Billy.
He said the rate went up.
Yeah.
That's so funny.
Billy was there.
I had a Billy Billy texted us.
He congratulated us.
Very validating.
Thorn, my thorn.
I hated how I looked yesterday.
I looked like shit.
That sucks.
I looked like the smokey eye ran.
Yeah, the smokey eye ran.
Let's just be honest with him.
He looked like shit.
No, he didn't look like shit.
I look like you're hot.
You don't look at it.
You don't ever look like shit.
I couldn't post anything to my Instagram.
You should have worn something like Win Wilder.
Yeah, I needed to.
I had a crop jacket.
Yes.
Fucking meshed up.
Wavella.
Listen, I want to say something to all you on the internet.
Everybody who's accusing the men of not dressing, I get it.
Last year, but this year, shut up.
The men look great.
And I'm sorry if you got mad that people wore tucks to a black tie event.
Okay.
That's what you wear.
Yes.
But I'm just going to start dressing like a slut.
My boys dressed up.
I saw some slutty boys.
I knew.
I want to dress up.
Wake dressed great.
Duck.
I don't know if you guys know Duck.
He wore the full pink tuxedo.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, there's a lot of men that were dressed up.
Dean's so cool.
He did look so cool.
Dean looked amazing.
Oh, even Jason the Ween with his Prada outfit.
Yes.
Yes.
Incredible.
I'm trying to think.
Nandre.
Nandre looked great.
Dan Clancy, three outfit changes.
And that's big for Dan.
Yes, it is.
That's a cool clause.
Will Meff, fucking fantastic.
Great outfit.
The boys showed up.
Listen, we're not going to compete with the girls ever.
The girls look fantastic.
I think we're giving them a run for their money.
Did our best.
No, we're not giving them a run for their money, but I do think that Wake had a really solid showing.
Handsome fella had a great outfit as well.
Best jest of the whole night.
I got to give it to her.
Jade.
Quarter Jade.
You know, it's so funny.
I wanted that dress.
Do that sculpted thing.
When I first saw her, I averted my eyes and I was like, Jade, either that is the most sheer thing I've ever seen or that's a piece of armor.
And she's like, it's a piece of armor.
And I went, what?
And I flipped it.
That was like, I know.
It was like a metal plate.
I almost got that dress.
Oh, so sick.
But it was, and I was considering getting it for next year, but now I'm not going to.
So it's a guy on TikTok that makes this dress.
Yeah.
And I emailed him.
And it's not even a dress.
It's like technically supposed to be, what is it like?
I think it's, fuck, I forget what it's called.
I was looking it up earlier when we were streaming, but it's like, it is armor.
Yeah, it's like it looks like a statue of David style.
Venus.
Yeah, statue of Venus style.
I'm going to do the David one next year and rock the little tiny cock plate.
I love that.
But I emailed the guy and I was like, I want this dress, blah, blah.
And he's like, okay, it's this much and it takes eight weeks to make.
And I was like, great.
And so I tell Taylor, I was like, send him my measurements.
I want that.
That's the dress I want to wear.
She sent him my measurements and he was like, we only make size six.
And I was like, oh, oh.
So I'm going to lose weight and wear it.
Only one size.
Which is funny to ask for my measurements, but then say you only look at it.
Wait, hold on.
They custom make them.
Why can't they customize?
I guess they don't.
I don't know.
They're like, we don't have enough supplies.
So it would have been like a saw.
Well, it's like those, like the boob shape, those aren't Jodi's boobs.
Those are the boobs that they use for everybody.
Those were the same boobs.
Yeah, I would have had those boobs.
But they just don't, they don't know how to make it.
I didn't see it.
Were they like size?
Was she covered from like?
It looked like she was wearing like a statue, like a naked statue.
Yes.
March, can you pull it up?
It's a beautiful dress.
I thought Caroline looked fantastic.
It'll be on Instagram.
Caroline looked fantastic.
Caroline slayed.
Caroline did.
You know who else looked amazing?
Cinnabrit.
Yes.
Cinna looked awesome.
Yes.
Cinna killed it.
Cinna said, Cinna said, I forgot my gloves.
I forgot my gloves.
I said, oh, wow.
Okay, you want to know what I also thought was incredible.
And I found out later that it, like, I thought Emeru's outfit was great.
Yeah.
But Emeru's outfit, you're not showing it on camera.
Oh, okay.
I thought Emeru's outfit was great.
And then I found out that she had a cape that she could have worn with the two.
Yeah, with a snow.
And that shit looked incredible.
Was she wearing more cape?
Austin just drooled on himself.
Ew.
Yo, you look great.
I'm going to give it to him.
I'm going to fucking say it.
Ms. Kiff.
Yeah, he's going to be a little bit more.
Ms. Kifflitt.
Best hero.
Yeah.
He looked like Jason Statham with hair.
Yeah, no.
He's wearing his hair.
I don't want to give him.
Yeah, I hate to admit it, but like, he did look cool.
He did.
He looked fantastic.
Yeah.
All my boys looked good.
I don't know.
Except me.
I looked at him.
I'm noticing you're in peach.
Come on.
I'm noticing.
You're saying a lot of names.
You haven't brought my name up.
That's because you're a little bitch and you didn't wear the outfit that I took you to get.
Okay.
Well, it would have been a classic black tux if I wore that.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I didn't want to wear a classic black tux.
Did he not, did he fit into the suits?
Yeah.
No, not the one that like Will got.
I wanted the one that like I he regretted it too.
I saw him tweet that he regretted it.
Listen, I get it.
You always want to make a splash.
I thought it was a very classic outfit.
We could have dressed it up with all get a stylus next year and go crazy.
I looked incredible.
Yeah, you did look incredible.
I was mostly talking to these two guys.
Hassan looked incredible.
I will say it.
Hassan looked incredible.
And I got to say, those tabby high heels were fly.
I thought so too.
I mean, they're fucking hard as shit to walk around.
Do you guys take pictures?
Yeah.
I didn't take that many photos.
Like, I didn't take like a full portrait item.
There was too long of a line.
It was a massive one.
I had to do a red carpet interview.
I'm not going to lie.
I did do something very catty and I apologize to everybody because I worked the red carpet the whole time and I knew the photographer.
Yeah.
I went up and I skipped the line.
Fucked up.
I got into it with the bartender.
I said, I've been working the last three hours.
I'm sorry, guys.
I just want photos before we go in.
I had a little bit of a customer service related issue with the bartender.
Uh-oh.
Here we go.
Let him go.
Let him go.
Do you want to speak?
I was just going to say on the bright side, I think next year.
No, this will be a whole topic.
So you go.
I went up to order a drink and the gentleman says, I need your ID.
And I said, oh, no worries.
I'll go get it.
And he's like, yeah, it's been like that for the last 50 years.
And I went, oh, I said, oh, oh, really?
I said, oh, I didn't.
I wasn't aware.
I didn't know that.
And we kept it catty.
He was very catty.
He was so county about it.
And I was like, and I was like, and he kept going.
And I was like, I'm not arguing with you.
I'm ID.
No, he was being a dick.
And he was, he, he was a dick big time.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's why I'm confused.
I had to go get, no, I, which is totally fine for him asking for to make it clear.
He was asking for ID, not an issue whatsoever.
But shouldn't have been that way.
No, he would, he, he was, he was mean all the time.
Rose and Thorne.
My Rose, I think this is an interesting Rose, I think, but a really good Rose this year was working with and getting to know Jinxy more because he is just the most pleasant little petunia.
I was, I will say, knowing his online persona versus the graciousness and the thought that he put into his videos.
Oh my God.
I was shocked.
He got to have me so soon.
Yeah, I was shocked at how profound his little acceptance speeches were.
I was like, damn.
So if you guys don't know, if someone's not attending, I ask them for a video regardless if they're winning or not.
I just say, hey, give me a video in case you win this, this, and this.
Sometimes they send the video, sometimes they don't.
I only really start bothering them if they are like in the top two.
Then I'll be like, hey, da, Because also sometimes people choose not to accept it.
They'll be like, no, I don't want it.
So then you happens.
You guys will never know whomst, but that does happen.
And so anyway, he, the first day I message him, hey, congrats on your nominations.
You got this.
I know you're not attending.
He has reasons that he couldn't attend.
And, you know, we talked about that.
And so I was like, do you want to co-stream?
And he's like, yes, please.
And he sent all of his videos in one day.
And he's just like, he's such a cool kid.
I say kid because I am.
He's like 22, right?
Yeah.
I'm like, I'm not.
You know who the first person was to tell me that he was a really smart guy?
It was Dan Clancy.
Really?
Dan Clancy had glowing things to say.
He's really sweet.
Yeah.
He's really sweet.
He's really like so respectable.
In the words of Shaq, I got to say, I'm sorry.
I was unfamiliar with your game.
I mean, he nailed the TikTok algorithm to Twitch method.
So, I mean, it's obvious that he knows what he's doing.
A lot of people think, like, oh, this guy's like dumb.
He yells a lot, but clearly.
No, I was very impressed.
This was the first time I've like had conversations with him.
And I was like, wow.
All right, Thorn, air some bitch out now.
My biggest Thorn, do people not know what the word RCP means?
Uh-oh.
Talk about it.
I'm not going to flame you, Hassan, because you always show up and you're my friend, so you kind of get a pass.
I don't, I had, I'm not kidding you, the last two days before the show, 30 people bail.
I can't, I can't change catering numbers.
I can't change security.
I can't.
That's so much money just in the garbage.
That's so much food in garbage.
So many people that would have rather taken it.
I would love to be there.
Like, how just don't come, like, and dude, I did, I did.
I saw this on Twitter.
No, this guy's fine.
The one you saw on Twitter is Facebook who tweeted that out.
And I was like, Space, what the heck?
You know, I DM'd him.
He was like, he didn't seem to get it.
He said he thought he was just a face in the crowd.
And I think people don't realize that this isn't just like a corporate big event.
This is like, I'm paying for your dinner, baby.
Every single person that's invited is hand selected by me.
Like, if you don't want to be there, please.
I wish you would have told me.
Like, if you couldn't, if you can't, that's the thing.
If you cannot be there, just tell me.
There were people that didn't even tell me that didn't show up.
But this was a crazy one.
A day before the event, just, and again, I know things happen.
XQC Security and No Shows00:03:44
Yeah.
I really do.
You just, poor freaking sweet Anita got COVID.
Yeah.
She flew all the way here.
She got freaking COVID.
How awful.
You know, I will never hold that against her.
And luckily, I have my team there.
And I know every year I'm going to have some empty seats because of stuff like this.
So like, I was able to have like my, my videographer take Sweet Anita's seat or like, you know, so I have seat fillers to an extent, but they're like, you know, that's a lot of seats.
But the day before, this is all they say.
Won't make it on Saturday.
Let me see.
Who is it?
I'm not going to say.
I absolutely will not say.
It's pretty cold.
No apology.
No nothing.
You just said, oh, okay.
But I just, just like, at least explain like even, like, even XQC, that freaking rascal bitch, he, he tells me, he's like, I'm so sorry.
I've got this problem.
I got this.
I will pet you.
You don't need to push Fiona out of the way.
If XQC can tell me why he can't make it, so can you.
And if you, if that's too much to ask.
And XQC, it's kind of your fault for even inviting him.
I'll say it.
At this point.
It's your, yeah, 100%.
Like, it just wants to be heard against.
Yeah.
Any person that invites XQC to any event is fucking delusional, unless it's gambling involved, unless you got like 100 grand in the bag in cryptocurrency waiting for you.
He usually never lets me down, okay?
Yeah, he talking about it.
He showed up last year.
He asked if he could present an award.
He's hasn't shit camp was an exception, but there was a lot going on we learned about later.
Yeah, but still.
But he usually hasn't let me down.
But anyway, I don't want to talk about it.
But anyway, I just, it's just sad because there's people that would love to take their seats.
And again, just say no to me before.
It's fine if you can't come.
It's so fine if you can't come.
Huh?
Aiden?
Is that what you said?
Oh, I did invite Aiden, but that's, he'd never filled out an RCP.
It's people that I invite.
They fill out an RCP, adding their dietary restrictions, adding their photo for security, adding all this information, and then just not coming.
Wait, I didn't remember a photo for security.
Did I?
You did.
I put it in for you.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
It's okay.
I didn't RCP.
Yeah, I filled it out.
But you knew I was.
I did.
You did.
I said, why didn't you do that?
I forgot.
Yeah.
I said I was going to do it and I forgot.
You could have done it.
You could have found it.
It does take five seconds.
I know.
Yeah.
Have found time.
You just have to tell like, if you fill out an rcp and then you don't show up, that's so.
Yeah, I was listening, we're not.
We're not yelling at me about this because like, I always show up okay yeah, i'm very reliable, so I will say I do go ahead.
Maybe this is petty.
Have I ever been not reliable?
No he's, he's always on time exactly.
This might be petty of me, but essentially, when you check in, you get id cards and we keep all of those extra id cards and anybody who just no call, no shows.
You never get an invite again.
Wait really yeah damn, you just made me throw away food and a spa and like it's just literally doing the vcts right now.
He was up for two yeah, he was up for two awards.
He made it.
He made it before flew from the freaking like you RCP that he was.
He was doing a tournament, the yeah, in the morning you don't have to come, but if you say you're coming, then come.
Yeah no, that's messed up, that's messed up.
But overall I think like uh, no drama happening this year.
Like, not it not a lot of drama happening this year.
Bad for the podcast sorry, damn.
Fraudulent Bitches and Recaps00:12:19
But uh, overall, I think it like uh, allows people to feel positive, more positive about the event than they ever.
The biggest complaints i've seen is like, oh, there's so many ads, i'm paying for the show.
Yeah, that's a, that's a complaint, that.
So i'm like, if that's your complaint well, I thought it was a great event.
Great event.
I love the ads.
We can put it to bed now.
Yeah yes, put it.
Happy successful, gracious to be surrounded by so many talented people.
We're ready for the next one.
On to our next endeavor, cutie Cinderella getting on a plan this year.
It's gonna happen.
We're not supposed to talk about that.
I didn't bring it up.
It's boring and repetitive, but but it is happening.
Shut up yeah, Hasan.
Shut up yes, and even Kaya thinks so look no, Kaya's giving me support yes, and like they're being mean to you.
What else is going on in the world, guys?
Well, i'm opening up my note.
Oh, I paid for Hasan's dinner the other night.
Oh, that's true.
Okay, this is fun.
I took Hasan.
I want everybody to know this, that I took Hasan and several people out for dinner has.
Actually, I invited several people out for dinner.
I invited myself and then Hasan invited himself.
Oh, I texted you.
You didn't respond, Cutie.
You were insanely busy with the Stream awards.
There's no way you would have gone.
Cutie would have appreciated a nice dinner.
He didn't want to invite you because he's a misogynist.
No, that's not true.
Oh, i'm sorry.
Were there any women in the dinner?
No, there were no women involved because you wanted it that way.
No no no no Cutie, this is, this is not the way.
I suggested Cutie be invited and you said no uh, I have, I have.
That's not true.
That's not true.
Will didn't respond to my text message.
So why did you invite Will but not Cutie?
Because Cutie was so busy with the Stream awards and I?
No, that's not true.
Hold on, let me look.
I text you more than any of these two.
Okay, All right.
Hold on.
It's because on Tuesday, I knew you were busy.
I knew you were busy.
All right.
I was texting you on Twitter.
She just melted.
I was texting you on Tuesday.
Hey, do you have a seating chart?
Sorry to bug you Wednesday.
I just knew you were busy and I didn't want to bother you.
Wait, wait, wait.
So on the day that we went to dinner, you were texting her about some nonsense, but you've been in a texture about, hey, would you like a nice day?
I swear to God.
On my dying.
You wouldn't have come.
I appreciate the no, you would have come.
Say you would have to go.
No, you wouldn't have come.
Will didn't even respond to my text messages anymore.
Because you'll text me right before you know I'm going live.
No, I texted you at like four.
I think my mom and dad really dogs.
Can we not fight?
They're not.
They're making out.
But anyway, I paid for a very expensive dinner for Hassan.
I just wanted everybody to know that.
It was.
It was an expensive dinner.
We went to Rooftop Squeezy.
Squeezy and his two friends.
Where was their last night?
You switched.
Yeah.
Are you clout chasing bitch?
He is.
He wanted.
I'm not clouting.
He wanted Squeezy all to himself.
And then when I invited myself, he was upset.
No, no, no, no.
Hold on.
Hold on.
Let me say this.
That's not true.
I was upset because you invited yourself under the premise that you wanted a free meal.
That's what he wanted.
He wanted a free meal and he said, oh, you're paying.
I'm coming and I'm going to order a no, I was going to take him out anyway.
But no, I wanted to take Squeezy out because he took me to a couple of great dinners.
I wanted to take him out by yourself.
Jury, Jury, Will, I have a question.
Terry Separat.
You contracted an amazing Austin Ox video this year.
Oh, drama.
Streamer flashbacks.
Yeah, he doesn't fuck with you.
I knew it.
That bitch.
I don't think he fucks with you.
I don't.
The second year in a row.
But I will give him a pass.
He did send me a giant list of everyone who was including the video, and he said, Will you check this and see if I'm missing anybody?
And I just said, It's good.
And I didn't look at the list because I just trusted him.
You know who doesn't fuck with you then?
Cutie.
Well, I could have, I should have checked, but I just kind of assumed.
Let me tell you.
Let me tell you, if Maya wasn't on that list, I'm nominated for two awards.
Yes.
Oh.
Was I on the list?
Was I in it?
Yes.
I was.
Everybody was in it, but me.
Two years in a row now.
Wait, which one?
The recap video?
Yes.
You were on the recap video.
No, I wasn't.
Yes, you were.
You're dancing with Elvis on Name Your Price in the recap.
Oh, yeah, you were on the recap.
No, not the recap, the throwback of everybody's friends.
First somewhere.
Oh, was that Austinox?
Yeah.
Throwback when it was Austinox?
That talent.
I'm thankful I wasn't dogs.
Enough, dogs.
We can kick him out and close the door.
I'm fine with that.
That's enough.
Ouch.
Dogs out.
Dogs out.
Kaya.
Out.
Go.
House.
Dog out.
Up.
House.
Go.
Home.
What is house?
Place.
Place.
Get out.
You blew it.
Ouch.
Both dogs.
Both dogs.
Ouch.
I'm not yelling at them.
I believe that dogs are out.
Get the fuck out.
Both dogs.
Go.
Go.
Go out.
Fiona.
You, Fiona.
Ouch.
Get out.
Both dogs.
Fiona.
You blew it.
Fiona.
Dogs blew it.
Fiona blew it when she farted.
Fiona?
No, baby.
Both dogs.
Both dogs.
Fiona?
Get out of here.
It's enough.
Wow.
Kaya literally thinks Fiona is a chew toy.
I swear to God.
You can't close the door with the guy.
Okay, camera.
Are they okay?
I swallowed Fiona.
Hold on.
She's eating Fiona.
No, no, no.
They play like non-stop.
They fight non-stop, but in a good way.
Yeah, yeah.
But they do.
Fiona's bleeding.
No, they do it here as well.
You haven't even gotten to the point where, like, listen, I'm a dog mom.
So funny as he said.
This is the most violent fight happening.
You haven't even gotten, you haven't even seen the worst of it when she starts going, Fiona starts making a very weird noise when they're having fun.
It's very weird.
Kitty, what else is going on in your world?
Right now, I'm mostly just tired.
Okay, mostly just tired.
Yeah.
Thank you.
I'm pretty worn out.
Is that that whine about it content we've been hearing about?
That's it.
That's the juice.
We recorded wine about it today and it was pretty bad.
What?
It's pretty bad.
Yeah, because I was so tired.
We had to do it right before I woke up to my.
How many hours of sleep did you get last night?
Last night, I actually slept finally.
Maya still loves me in collab stream.
That's true.
Why are you looking at me like that?
Yeah, aren't you supposed to go clean up garbage at the beach or something?
Yeah, exactly.
She said, she left because she's fraudulent.
Now that, yeah, she's a fraudulent.
She's a fraudulent bitch.
Okay.
She's a fraudulent bitch.
Now that you are done working on stream rewards, now you can set up all of our dates that you owe us.
Yes!
You fraudulent.
You fraudulent bitch.
Fraudulent bitch times two.
That's right.
You owe me like eight fucking dates.
Because every day that goes by between now and then, I'm going to chop down a tree in the rainforest.
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm kicking a fucking peacock in the face.
Peacocks, I don't know if they're in the rainforest.
Whatever.
Whatever is made up to that region, we will kick it in the fucking face.
Yeah.
What are you going to do?
What?
I don't know what the hell is that?
He's not upset.
I'm not upset at all.
I don't want to go on my date.
Why?
That's mean.
I'm taking his date as well because I paid the most.
No, no, no.
Hold on.
Wait, no, I would love to go on a date.
I just didn't think, I didn't want it to be filmed.
I wanted it to be an intimate moment with Connor Eats Pants and I.
Oh, I was going to say who bought.
You have to go to a cash.
Oh, right.
You don't stream.
No, I do.
I do now.
You're going to.
You're all going to be sorry.
Shut up.
You're all going to be sorry.
You're going to do one episode a month.
Well, no, it's going to be once a week for the first month.
And then you're going to do one episode every week in a hot tub.
I hope you can't.
You better keep up with that breakneck streaming schedule.
You better get your floaties ready.
Hassan, you're in my tub.
Okay.
You can wear a shirt if you want.
That's lame.
I don't want to get that shirt.
You're asking him for the tub.
You're going to be in my tub, too.
Don't you worry.
I don't care to be in his tub.
I don't.
Hold on.
Wait, wait, wait.
You're a fraudulent bitch.
No, wait, hold on.
Hold on.
I'm surrounded by fraudulent people.
Oh, excuse me.
I want to be in my tub.
I'm going to be in your tub.
You don't even need to be in my tub.
You only want to be in my tub so you can get Ludwig in my tub.
That has no, that has nothing to do with it.
But it would be a good thing.
It's a typical LA class chaser.
I have Ludwig's number.
I could call him.
I could call him and have him in my tub if I wanted to.
Yeah, that's what they all said.
No, I don't.
Oh, my God.
You want to hear something crazy?
This, I get this message.
So every once in a while, people request will call tickets.
And they're like, my agency will be like, hey, so-and-so on a will-call ticket.
I was like, that's fine.
So-and-so-on's will-call ticket.
That's fine.
So-and-so once a will-called ticket, that's fine.
So-and-so-on's will-call ticket.
No, she tried to sleep with my boyfriend.
I had one of those come through.
I was like, no.
The audacity.
If you just noticed an idea, it's because this asshole leaked information.
No, I said my social security.
No, no, no, that's not true.
Hassan got his cock out.
Yeah, that's a belief.
We were all talking and he just whipped it out so fast.
It just whipped it over to no reason.
I was like, hey, this is what Drake is like.
Happy Turkish New Year.
I want a snack.
How close are we, Marsh?
Okay, well, let's talk about this.
Fuck you guys.
We're ending at 59 minutes.
If you want an extra minute, come to the Patreon.
No, we're going to, we're going to keep.
I'm going to keep talking.
Okay, fine.
Yes, and no, Fiona, get out.
Oh, my God.
She's back.
She's going to fart again.
Fuck, no.
She's such a tiny dog, but she is a powerful ass, it turns out.
That could be a sign of something very wrong, I think.
No, I think it's because she probably tried to eat Kaya's feed a little bit.
Oh, that's all right.
Fiona, you're very cute, though.
You're her feed.
Well, thank you guys for watching another episode of Fear Ann.
We're gonna have to.
Oh, we sold out of calendars.
Oh, yeah.
Let's go.
We're gonna talk a lot about Patriot item coming up.
Jockstraps.
What?
Body pillow.
Oh, shit.
The body pillows are coming with the clothes.
Fear and jockstrap would go hard.
The clothes are coming soon.
The clothes look really good.
Well, we got two drops.
Marsh is working on one on Marshall.
So we're gonna have, hey, we're getting, we're getting somewhere.
That's right.
We'll get some more.
Hey, what a great time to look forward to our year and go.
It's gonna be good.
Yes.
I always, you know how I look at streamer awards before we end?
I always look at it as like a motivator to be like, next year, starting today, you have to be greater than you were last year because I want to be up there again.
That's nice.
Okay, you kind of said that.
I can't get nominated.
I'm so working on it.
No, no, no, you can.
You choose not to.
Imagine.
No, that'd be insane.
Imagine.
If she got nominated, I feel like it would be so much worse for her mental state.
I'm going to plot with your production company one time to give you the Lifetime of Achievement Award.
Or do you think it's going to go to somewhere else, someone else?
And then boom, bang.
No, that would be the worst thing you could do to her.
I would walk on stage with a gun and simply I won't say it.
All right, let's end it there.
With the assassination threat.
No, myself.
Insufferable.
I have a request.
What's that?
You're all going to go to the Dune 2 premiere with me.
When's that?
It's at the beginning of the next day.
Are you going to film it?
Sure.
No.
Oh, I thought you were doing like an IRL stream and then you wanted to switch.
I'm going to go see a movie with my friends.
I would love to.
It's something I care about and I'd like to include you.
I would love to go.
Can I fuck the popcorn bug?
No.
I'm going to fuck the popcorn buggy.
Oh, it's long.
But that's an insane question to ask.
Dude, you said you want to go to a movie and she's going to be a little bit more.
I don't ask for anything.
One of you is going to fuck the popcorn bucket and one of you's at his count minutes.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I didn't realize that participating in the way that you're supposed to was a crime.