Hasan Piker, QTCinderella, WillNeff, and AustinShow recount their chaotic TwitchCon Las Vegas weekend, marked by a terrifying elevator malfunction where debris fell from the ceiling, a $40 M&M room service dispute, and Hasan's gambling losses at Cosmopolitan blackjack. They navigate scheduling errors for Dida Vonte's burlesque show, security failures leaving Caroline behind, and emotional distress over missing a fan from Missouri. Amidst debates on hot sauce pricing and Tulum cruises, the group balances fundraiser guilt regarding the Ukraine war with dark humor about potential merchandise sales following Hasan's near-death experience, ultimately highlighting the intense interpersonal dynamics of modern streaming culture. [Automatically generated summary]
Transcriber: nvidia/parakeet-tdt-0.6b-v2, sat-12l-sm, and large-v3-turbo
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Hardcore Sex Show Defense00:10:13
Austin.
Okay, we're rolling now.
That is so bad.
Austin, do you want to go?
No, no, I'm not missing this podcast.
I'm just going to jump.
Shut the fuck up.
I got it.
Stop doing that piece.
I like that there was a brief moment where you...
Look at my hands.
I like that there was a brief moment where you unironically pointed at Austin and said, do you have to go?
I would kill him.
I'm just, I'm trying to make somebody's wedding.
Hey.
I'm missing Knut's wedding for this podcast.
Knut, I'm so sorry.
Listen, I wanted Austin to not be here for this next part because the internet's going to skin him alive for this.
Oh, God, what's going on?
He walked in to my hotel room, my temporary room, and he said, Will, I'm starving.
Can I have some M ⁇ Ms?
And he grabbed the bar M ⁇ Ms. Those are like $35 instead of the hospitality suite that's free.
Yes.
That's a block away.
And then today, again, in my room, without asking, he grabbed another $20 tin of M ⁇ Ms. He has spent $40.
How many did he have?
He didn't have M ⁇ Ms. He didn't have all of it.
On my room service tab when we have a hospitality suite with unlimited free candy two minutes away.
In my defense.
There is no defense for this one.
In my defense, they're in a nice, beautiful glass jar.
I don't want you.
Okay, so how many of you have?
I ate all the bottles.
You ate the entire bottle of M ⁇ M?
No, they were only like six.
They are small.
Hear me out.
I didn't know how much they cost until just recently.
What are you?
Were you in a coma until yesterday?
No, you never stayed in a hotel before you did the moment.
No, I knew they were going to be a little.
Exactly.
No, no, I knew they were going to be a little bit more of an elevated cost.
But you know what?
In the Patreon, I'll be making a phone call complaining about the price of the M ⁇ Ms. I think it's a little ridiculous.
Yeah.
Well, you should get it free since you almost died.
Ladies and gentlemen, let's dial back a little bit.
We are Fear End and we are live from TwitchCon.
Las Vegas.
Las Vegas Vegas.
That's right.
And if you couldn't tell by the fact that we all sound like Fran Dresher, it's been a long weekend.
Very long weekend.
We're also sitting in the iconic place where the Beatles played in 1968 right here overlooking the beautiful Las Vegas.
Isn't that right?
It's a very long weekend.
Austin, you barely did shit.
Excuse you.
I hosted a show.
I hosted one show.
And a meet and greet.
Are you kidding me?
I had a meet and greet.
I had three meet and greets and two shows.
Well, that's your problem.
Cutie, cutie.
No one can keep up with your pace.
Also, yeah, that's kind of your.
I'm recording the stupid podcast right now.
I'm supposed to be at the women's dinner right now.
And then I'm supposed to.
All I want to do is begin to see boobs.
I spit so much on this mic.
We're your biggest show.
You can't call us stupid anymore.
I'm just mad.
Exactly.
Nobody wants to hear women speak.
That's right.
That's right.
Why am I going to be able to do that?
How does that work?
I'm going to go to the women's dinner.
Nobody wants to hear you.
The women's Twitch dinner.
They want to hear us berate you.
Cutie and I are going to be going to the women's dinner out there.
You're not invited to that or the sex show.
Whatever.
I'm going to the sex show alone then.
I'm going to be at the sex show alone.
Yeah, that's because if I go to the sex show with you, you're going to make me late.
Cutie, do you know what his first question about the sex show was?
What?
Do they serve dinner?
I'm a little peckish.
I was hungry.
That's a valid question.
I think it's valid.
And the answer may shock you.
The answer may surprise you, actually.
They don't serve food.
No, they do.
TD bars actually have beautiful buffets.
Wait, we're going to the titty bars.
It's like a burlesque show.
It's a burlesque.
They probably serve food there.
But I heard it's like crazy.
And I have a table, so they probably should serve food.
Thank you so much, Kitty.
I can look forward to our sitting on the bottom.
Wait, who else is going?
No one right now.
Nobody wants to go.
We're going.
It's girls' night.
Wait, you're going to go to a titty show by yourself?
Nobody will go with me because they're all going to the women's dinner.
And all I wanted to do was go to Dida Vonte's.
She's my famous burlesque dancer.
It's all I want to do.
She's so famous.
And I want to go.
I wanted to go.
But I got the dates messed up because I'm dyslexic.
And her show was yesterday and it's not today.
And now I can't go.
And you were Vegas.
This is the date 21 and 22.
As an ambassador of this dyslexic community, you just fucked that up.
Wait, okay.
There's more that she fucked up than just that.
She, first, first night we're in Las Vegas.
Cutie's like flexing how she booked a spa date.
In the group chat, talking about how she's like, well, you know what, guys?
I got a spray tan in the hotel room.
And then tomorrow morning, I have a spa day.
And I was like, oh, spa day?
That's pretty cool.
I was sad.
She's like, how do we do it?
And then she sent a link to do it as well in the group chat.
Unbeknownst to all of us, because I didn't click on it.
Turns out, what happened, Cutie?
Where was the spa?
Okay, we're staying at the Conrad Hotel.
Yep.
And I booked the Conrad Spa.
Yep.
And then I go down and I walk to the spa and I say, hello.
It's under Cinderella QT.
And then they said, we don't have you.
And I said, what?
And they're like, I said, they just called me for confirmation.
What do you mean they don't have me?
And they're like, we don't, you're not on here.
And I'm like, then who called me?
I call the number back and it's like, this is the Conrad Spa in Los Angeles.
How can we help you?
Oh, no.
Right.
And I've never felt more sad because it was like the only three hours this whole weekend I've had to myself and I all I wanted was a massage.
Okay, you this is your fault though a little bit.
Not the not the dyslexia thing, but like the fact that you booked yourself silly over this week.
That is true.
Kitty, what are you doing?
You're streaking yourself.
To the point where you called our podcast stupid and dumb and tried to skip it.
I call you guys stupid and dumb every week.
You belong to the streets.
Okay.
Wait.
What the fuck are you doing?
Her schedule is so stupid.
How do you have three bones?
Hassan.
Hassan didn't even show up to the convention.
I did.
I was there.
Oh, he was next to you.
Oh, he was on our show.
He was on.
I was on.
Yeah, you did.
I did buy your day before.
God, I forgot about that.
It's all blur this weekend.
Every event that you had, I was there.
And you sold him for future events.
He wasn't.
By the way, we sold a lot of tickets for that.
Oh, my God.
We sold a lot of tickets for that show.
Look, what?
Cutie, you are fabulous and fantastic and beautiful and natural.
Just want to let you know that.
No, Las Vegas is like, I always wonder who Las Vegas is designed for.
It's Cutie Cinderella.
Why?
She's telling me.
I'm trying to get.
I was supposed to go with a group of girls to the sex show, and now none of the girls can go because they're all at the women's dinner.
I will go with you to the sex show.
I've got a beautiful date, and him and I will join you.
I don't know how many times I have to tell him that you're not a girl.
I don't think she wants to go to the sex show with you, Dad.
I want to go and you're going to complain.
No, are you kidding me?
I would never complain at the sex show.
You guys make me seem like I'm some sort of mom.
I'm going to go to the sex show and be like, why are there no dicks here?
I think it's both.
No, hold on.
I want to go.
Stratosphere.
Wait, do they fuck at the sex show?
No.
They don't?
What the hell is the point of a sex show if they're not fucking?
Have you never seen burlesque?
He's already complaining.
You started complaining before you went there.
We haven't even left yet.
How is that positive?
I wanted to see some hardcore fucking at the sex show.
Is that what it is?
I just told you it's not.
No, it's like it's burlesque.
It's supposed to be tasteful.
It's like, you know, why do they try to push it?
Braziers, Braziers, like people dressed up in like, it's like a Gilded Age era fit.
You know what I mean?
God, you know what?
I'll do it for you.
I might have to go to Austin because no one else is.
Everyone's saying no to me.
Yeah.
I hated this weekend with a passion.
I hate Vegas with a passion.
Oh, come on.
You had fun last night.
I did, but the problem is I get punished.
Here, can you throw that?
Here, I'll give this to Will.
Allah punishes me for drinking alcohol and doing other haram shit by having a gay friend.
By giving me...
Well, no, you punish me.
That's just a punishing relationship in general.
Yeah.
No, but Allah has punished you.
You must like it.
Exactly.
For being a sinner and giving me a crippling hangover for like not even like I wasn't fucked up last night.
Like I was, I was buzzed.
Oh, he was fucked up.
I was drunk.
You were asleep at the blackjack, dude.
It was 5 a.m.
That's why I was asleep at the blackjack.
I was like, oh, God, I'm so tired.
What the fuck am I doing?
I was on autopilot.
Getting cleaned out.
12s every time.
This woman, let me say something, okay?
Agatha.
Oh, thank God it was.
Was that her name?
Let me look right at the fucking camera.
I know you're shit.
She doesn't deserve that.
I know what you were fucking doing.
We're at the high roller table.
Okay.
We're at the high roller table.
She busted out the big gun.
She was like, you?
Fuck you.
You?
I'm going to fuck you up.
That's what she said to me.
Wait, like, with her eyes.
No, she didn't say that.
No, she didn't say that, but she was actually a little bit more.
Why would you think she was with me?
Because, like, I would hit.
I would hit like this, and she would not register.
She'd be like, no, you have to do it like double tap.
I was like, come on.
Oh, the person at the table.
Like, I've been, I've been, I've been gambling my whole life.
I've been gambling a lot.
Like, I know, I know what the rules are.
Like, that's not for the camera.
Like, you don't have to double tap for the camera.
Yeah.
And, and, you know, she would just like, if I didn't put my chips down quick enough, she would literally start serving immediately and would not give me a card.
And I was like, she's like, yeah, you just, you got to keep your eye on the ball.
Oh, my God.
Yeah.
She was like, not only, she not only took like $1,000 out of my pocket and put it directly into the casino fund.
Why did you stay at the table?
You know why?
Emergency Jump Epiphany00:06:54
Because I would have gotten up and left.
You don't deserve my business.
I have a weird social anxiety about this.
I've talked about this before.
I wonder if you guys feel the same way.
When you sit down at a blackjack table and you're getting fucking cleaned out, I...
You don't want to walk away like you're poor?
No, like, I'm poor.
You took all my money.
I don't, I don't care about that at all.
I don't give a shit.
No, I feel like it's rude.
Like, there's a social dynamic there.
You're on the table and you're establishing rapport.
And I feel like it's very rude to get up.
Like, if a new dealer comes in, for example, I can't immediately leave.
I always feel bad.
As soon as you lose a hand, you say, oh, shoot, that's my sign.
And then you get up and leave.
That's what I say.
Oh.
I don't know.
It's so easy.
You're like afraid of technology.
How do you not have this hangup?
This social hangup?
What technology?
Well, we did just hug because you thought we were going to die.
Literally, number one, I'm afraid of heights.
Number two, you literally almost died in the elevator.
I did almost die.
These are valid somehow.
I'm still not afraid.
Speaking of which, that was, have you guys gotten any...
We haven't talked.
Tell the podcast.
Yeah, explain what happened because this trip, I think.
And I still have to go down that elevator and I'm not ready.
No, different elevator.
Well, it's next to it.
Okay.
So, yeah.
Marshy boy and I and some ladies were in an elevator that had a really interesting thing happen.
On the way up, Hassan and I were in the same elevator and we heard a loud kachunk and we were both kind of freaked out by it.
It didn't even register with them for some reason.
Will and I were looking at each other like, did you just fucking see that?
Yeah.
Because like it was a loud thunk.
And when you were going up, you were in it too?
Yes.
When we were going up.
It was a loud thunk followed by, I'm not kidding you, pieces falling off of the elevator.
Like screwdrivers falling off the top and falling next to the elevator in the elevator shaft.
And we heard it.
It was like dust from the tiles in the top of the elevator.
Yeah.
So we go into the room and we hang out for a second.
He goes back down by himself, but Marshi and I and the girls get in the same elevator to go down.
And right around like the 44th floor, it just free fell.
And it felt like maybe like brakes caught and it just went like that.
Yeah, there's probably like an e-brake.
Dust and stuff came out of the ceiling and then it was not moving for like legitimately three or four minutes while I was pressing the emergency call button.
And during this period of time, the attitude in the elevator was simply making peace with our saviors.
Everyone was ready to call it, dude.
And I had this weird epiphany.
I had two thoughts.
First, what a cool way to die.
I'm not okay talking about that.
And second, I was like, dude, the candlelight vigil that Twitch is going to put on at TwitchCon is going to be so fucking tasteful.
And I just imagined Austin was going to take advantage of my death in a way that no one has ever taken advantage of a death before.
I would have canceled the show.
No, you wouldn't have to.
No, you wouldn't have.
No, you wouldn't have.
Why are you lying?
He would have given out my sauce from my room.
You would have sold tickets to the Houston show.
You would have been like Houston Show, now co-hosted by Will's hero, Jack Black Memorial Show.
Sell freaking shirts and say, I miss Will Neff.
Unfortunately, we've doubled the price of the tickets so that we can give a small portion of that to charity.
5% goes to charity, folks.
5% of the tickets go.
Look, I would have, I would have, Will would have wanted me to continue to do the show.
Oh my God, we said this verbatim.
Will we literally, Will ever talk about this?
You're like, Austin would 100% start it off by saying, Will would want me to do this.
But Will, would you?
You would have wanted it that way, folks.
Will, you would have wanted it that way.
Right?
You would have wanted it that way.
I've always told him, don't let my death goes to waste.
Don't let my death go to waste.
Make on a book tour.
I would have called Hassan and would say, Hassan, Will, you guys have a relationship unlike any of us.
I want you to know what I should do.
And Hassan would have said, Austin, the show must go on.
My one request when you're pimping my death is, you know, those like those shirts that they make in the inner city when people die where it's like a hand, like a really nice picture of me with like doves, RIP.
I just want merch shirts of me like that.
With like the airbrush, the cursive airbrush.
Yeah, fuck.
Will nef.
Yeah, but it was scary, man.
Died of self-suck.
Marsh had a 5,000-mile stare for the rest of the night.
Yeah, so eventually I would die.
Eventually, they got out.
But the emergency call button didn't work.
It just did you call 911 or like I would have called 911.
Katie, in the five minutes that I was making peace with the fact that I was about to die, I was just holding my thumb on the emergency call button going.
And you know what?
Everybody asked me, and I was doing that thing in my head.
If I jump at the very last second, can I negate the downward momentum of this elevator?
Yeah.
I was looking at the little girls in the elevator with me, all like all 100 pounds of them because they're, what are they?
Like, the heaviest one is like 100 pounds, right?
Yeah, yeah.
And I was like, how many of these girls do I have to stack up to brace my impact so that if they turn to jelly, my body will be protected?
Wait, there's like a little like airbag at the bottom.
There's like a little metal thing for you.
You made that up.
You've been saying that.
There's like a, there's like a piece of it.
Like, it's not elevator and then pavement.
There's like a little, there's something below the elevator.
There's no 55-floor airbag.
He thinks there's an airbag.
No, there's like a metal thing that will like, you know, maybe not save you, but it'll at least just turn your legs into dust.
So I was thinking you would pin yourself up like on the you know what I'm saying?
Like, well, I was, I was going to go jump or human body bag.
I feel like.
I don't think I would have survived that.
I don't know enough about physics, but I feel like that's not how anybody is doing it.
No, it did.
I don't think it works, but everybody at the convention asked me, Did you do the little jump at the end?
And I was like, I started to realize, I was like, damn, how do you time that?
Yeah.
So skill issues.
Can you imagine being in the wreck of an elevator where all your friends have just been turned to liquid and the emergency?
You're like, thank God I jumped.
How did you survive?
I jumped at the exact right time.
It was fucking crazy, dude.
So here's the deal.
What first is it about this game?
Walk out.
Hey, March, L. Fortnite dance on him.
Yeah.
Just covered in March.
Timing The Elvis Jump00:05:43
Did you guys get compensation?
No, so we're doing that in the paywall episode.
Yeah, so I will be calling the front desk.
I'm not going to lie.
I let you white-hatted the first day.
Yep.
And I got you a little voucher.
You got me 30 bucks at the food court.
Which he literally reneged.
Like, he took more than that with the MM.
He got me 30 bucks at the food court and spent $45 on MMs.
Well, Will had a temporary room.
His door didn't work.
Yada, yada, yada.
My door didn't work for 12 hours.
So I didn't have a room for the first 12 hours after I drove through the night.
So I had not, I had nowhere.
I like it.
It was not great.
So Will was very upset.
So I went down to the front desk and got him a $30 food and beverage voucher.
Didn't realize everything.
You can't get anything for $30 here at this hotel for food.
I enjoyed one of Austin's MMs that he took from my room.
That's like an $8 MM dog.
What do you mean?
Singular.
Are there any in here?
No.
You ate them?
See, Marshall.
Marsh.
Marsh, your Vegas trip, you need help.
Yeah, no, we're, I don't want to, I don't want to say how much money Marsh has lost.
Marsh has lost by far the most money gambling.
And when I say by far, I mean an exponential.
Marsh has lost more money gambling than I've ever lost in my lifetime.
Just on this weekend.
How much have we lost?
Can we say?
No, we can't.
He said no.
There's so much shame in him.
He said, there isn't.
Last night, he literally was like staring at me with those fucking beggar eyes where he was just like, come on, just like, you're leaving.
It's late.
Give me your chips.
Give me your chips.
Oh, no.
He got it twisted.
I need to win it all back.
He's like, he's like, yeah, he's going, you can afford it.
Come on.
And yes, of course I can.
But I was trying to get you to fucking stop gambling.
Oh, no.
I have not gambled at all.
Surprise, surprise.
I've been gambling wrong.
You're the cheapest guy I've ever met.
I'm not cheap.
Yeah, you are so Lebanese.
Oh, you think I'm cheap?
Yes, you are so fucking cheap.
You think I'm cheap?
Name one cheap thing that I do.
You are the most frugal person on the planet.
What are you talking about?
You will literally take you take trips specifically so you can have points that you can offset in the future.
You inconvenience yourself.
I don't do that anymore.
Oh, I stopped.
Yesterday, you ate MM's from everyone's rooms besides yourself.
No, I had three from my own room.
You had three boxes of MMs.
No bottles.
Thottles.
Three bottles.
Like of the little jugs.
You ate three jugs?
Yeah, and I had the Evian Waters, and I don't even want to look at the price of those.
Oh, you paid $12 of water.
Really?
Yeah.
I spent $47 on Waters.
See, this is what I mean.
You're frugal.
You're like already sweating it.
It's all right.
It's all good.
You know what?
You're not in Vegas that often.
I can have a few MMs in a couple of waters.
Hey, if you get the White Hat Karen operation to give us some chips for almost $200.
Oh, I'm going to tell him to comp everything.
Wow.
All right.
We're doing that on the paywall.
We're doing that on the payroll.
We're going to do this on the paywall.
I'm going to make sure that Marsh doesn't have to pay for this room and all the money he gambled gets back to his bank account.
Yeah.
No, there's no White Hat Karen that lets you.
No.
Let me tell you, you don't know the damage.
One option.
No, no.
There's two options they have.
They kneel to our demands or we own the hotel.
It's my father.
That's it.
Own the hotel.
That's right.
We'll own the hotel.
Well, guys, I actually have had a lovely trip.
This has been a phenomenal Twitch con.
Name your price.
Name your price.
Totally sold out theater.
Totally sold out.
PAC couldn't get a seat.
It was too much.
Can we talk about the Elvis impersonator?
He may watch this now.
Why would he watch this?
I mean, he should know.
I'm fearless.
You went too fucking long, Elvis.
You went way too long on your segment.
He had a great ass, though.
He had a great ass.
He did a good job.
He was a good Elvis.
Yeah, it was good Elvis, but he just went a little too long in the ceremony.
He got up there.
He was excited.
And what?
A segment that was supposed to last all of five minutes went for about 20 minutes.
It's always funny when you have like old school traditional media type, not even traditional media type, but like, what would you say?
What kind of entertainment would this be?
Would this fall under?
Like live performers.
Off Broadway.
Yeah, like live performers.
No, it reminded me of the hypnotist guy at Cutie's thing.
Like where amazing.
Where when you have a situation like that, when you have like new media entertainers who are like all ADHD and like weird and yeah, and then you have like that super old school guy with a fedora come in and just like talk for the most respectful of us.
Yeah, he is the most, well, and he's the most respected hypnotist in LA.
I loved it.
He works with the Yankees.
Well, he the Dodgers.
And he didn't care because he was getting paid either way.
The Yankees in LA.
Yeah.
He was.
But like, I felt the exact same way that I did about that guy with Elvis as well, where he's just like, this is my show.
Like, I've been doing this for 35 years, baby.
Like, let me just run this crowd.
Austin, I like how nervous you are about the Elvis.
Oh, no, it's fine.
I fucked the Elvis guy.
What's going on?
I didn't fuck the Elvis guy.
I didn't fuck Elvis.
All right.
I fucked Elvis.
Whatever.
Fuck it.
We'll move on.
He did have a nice ass.
He did.
He had.
I was staring at his ass the whole time.
No, he had a.
Hassan kept looking at me during the performance.
He was like, but Name Your Price was excellent.
Running The Crowd Like Elvis00:15:49
Name Your Price was excellent.
On top of that, we're continuing our show on the road.
That's right.
We're continuing our show on the road.
I didn't mean for this.
Right after this, we go to Houston, Texas, and then to Long Beach.
Tickets are still on sale.
NYPLive.com.
Hassan's going to be in Long Beach.
Cutie's going to be in Long Beach.
Will's going to be in Long Beach.
I'm going to be in Long Beach.
This was our meeting, Green.
Austin, Austin threatened every single one of our fans where he'd be like, you're coming to name your price, right?
And they'd be like, actually, I'm meeting my mother.
We're going to my father's funeral.
He'd be like, you got to go today.
Bring the father.
Bring your father.
Name your pride.
There were people like they were like, Yeah, I took a second mortgage out on my home so I could go to the Houston show, but I can't attend tomorrow.
It's like, oh, come on, you gotta do it.
Yeah, you gotta do it.
Double mortgage.
It is funny that I'm finally on a show of name your price, but I'm just the presenter.
The presenter's a major gig.
Cutie, you don't know how big that is.
The presenters, I haven't announced yet.
The presenter is like a co-host for us.
Yeah, yeah.
The product presenter.
Yeah, but I want to win the money.
Cutie, do you know how much I won?
I've won the price, by the way, finally.
Yeah, I want to win $3.
Cutie, you didn't tell me you wanted to be the contestant.
I don't want to anyone.
I don't know what I want to do.
Listen to this.
Cutie, listen to this.
I just want to go to the sex show.
I will do this for you.
What?
I'll be the product presenter.
You be the co-host.
No, I won't do a good job.
I'm too nervous.
I take back my pinky.
You and Austin.
It's okay, Cutie.
Don't touch me.
I'm losing.
Guys, I'm going to have to go down there.
No, I don't want to go down the elevator.
That's all I can think about.
It's cool.
You'll walk down 55 stairs.
Cutie, we'll jump.
We'll jump.
No, you're fine.
Up the elevator.
I had to be held by Will Nev and I had to talk to myself out loud.
And everyone in the elevator had to gaslight me that we were on the floor already.
Yeah, they're like, they're like, we're on the 30th floor.
We were like, we hadn't even moved yet.
There was a random guy who also couldn't get onto his floor, which I feel like compounded on your fears.
Yeah, he was.
He's like, oh, it's not working.
The elevator's not working.
He just kept talking about it.
He's like, I'm an elevator technician.
In 35 years, I've never seen an elevator do this.
And now I have to write it back down.
I'm like, when is this episode over?
I'm so stressed.
You're going to blow out your knees walking 55 fucking stairs.
You won't make it.
You're five flights.
All I feel is fear.
And now the podcast name finally makes sense.
Yeah.
Cutie, it's going to be okay.
I'll write it down with you.
I'll be there with you.
No, I told Austin again.
Do you not know what our podcast is named after?
Fear and loathing, your favorite movie.
No, no, no.
Well, Hunter S. Thompson, everything he did was fear and Lowly on the campaign trail, fear and loathing in Las Vegas, fearing.
So we are a continuation of that gonzo style of journalism.
I didn't realize that.
I didn't know that until just yesterday.
Yeah.
I can't see straight.
Are you okay?
I think I'm having a panic attack.
No, you're fine.
But I'll be fine.
I had a very Hunter S. Thompson day.
For the menthols.
Wait, they have some MMs in here.
Hold on.
Let me get this.
Or the whiskey.
Are you out of MMs?
Tell me.
I don't know where they are.
They're on the mini bar right above at the top.
There's MM's, Almonds, Pistachio.
Also, if you see an upskirt on the podcast, I'm wearing shorts.
So don't freak out.
Don't be excited.
But in the Patreon.
Yeah.
I'm skipping the Patreon episode.
I love you guys so, so much, but I just really need to go to the sex show.
Wait, so you're going to go to the sex show by yourself instead of being Maya said she will go.
Wait, cutie, the sex show.
Yeah, Maya's going to be.
Maya is going to be on the Patreon paywall episode.
Let's go.
I'll film the entire sex show for the Patreon payoff.
Cutie, cutie.
Cutie, you.
Can I do that?
Cutie, the sex show is not until 9.
I know, but I have to leave here.
It's 7.20.
We'll make it.
I'm stressed.
Cutie, we'll make it.
I'm really stressed.
We'll make it.
Don't worry.
You can go now if you want.
I'm not going now.
No.
I can't ride down the elevator by myself.
Okay.
Okay.
We're moving.
We're focusing.
I got up spray tan at two in the morning on Friday night, and it was cool on Thursday night.
Wait, but you look great.
And you looked great.
You look great.
Cutie, can I tell you something?
You have looked hot all weekend.
It's because I've actually done my makeup and I've actually tried to get dressed.
Cutie, you always look hot, but you've looked exceptionally hot this weekend.
It's called trying.
But you always try, but no, I don't.
You tried hard.
I would like to make it very clear.
I do not try.
She does not try.
99% of the time.
She just looks that good without trying.
Wow.
That's what we think.
Natural.
Ow.
I hit my tooth.
Without even trying.
She looks that good.
Okay.
Okay.
Yeah.
This is this has been probably the least productive weekend of my entire life.
Hassan took a day off.
I came.
I came here.
He took one day off.
He's one day off.
And he's like in fucking shambles.
I slept the entire day.
He gave his fans an excellent performance.
I name your price.
Yeah.
I feel like fucking dog shit.
I feel like dog shit, but it's not even like the alcohol or a hangover or anything.
I just, I feel awful for not even being able to stream today.
I just like, you know, I didn't bring my, I didn't bring the right equipment.
I, I fucked it up.
If I, if I was able to stream in between all the free time that I had, I probably wouldn't have.
I did stream.
I streamed one time.
That doesn't count.
One time in three days where you also did two shows.
Yeah, that's like nothing.
That's nothing.
We had a podcast.
Hassan, I got you a flight tonight.
Are you flying back tonight?
Did you get me the flight?
No, I didn't buy it yet.
Oh my God.
What?
I thought you were supposed to buy it.
Buy it.
You want me to buy it?
Just in case.
What do you mean, just in case?
Just in case.
Right now?
Use the Furan card.
I don't have the Furan card.
Marsha's the only one with our money.
There's a flight at 1045 on Southwest Airlines.
Don't touch me.
Two bags fly free.
1045.
And anything else we can put on a car?
If not, Hassan and I are going to drive back together.
Okay, the most stupid.
Will.
We're in the car.
We're in the car.
And Hassan's like, Hassan's like, okay, guys, I've got to drive back as soon as the podcast ends.
We're going.
I'm going back to LA with Will.
And Will was like, podcast ends.
I thought we were like hanging out.
Me and Austin are like, did you not read the group message yesterday?
When Will is begging Hassan to go on this road trip back, he's begging him.
And Hassan's like, as long as if we leave right at the pod, I will drive with you.
And you're like, yippee, best friend road trip.
And then you're like, we're in the car.
And you're like, wait, he wants to drive now?
I thought I was joking yesterday.
Cutie, I know for a fact you lied to your friends.
And I knew I had to lie to my friend to get him to have a good time.
He is not having a good time.
We're going to have a good time.
We're going to gamble more.
We're going to go to the next one.
We're going to get some pizza.
We're going to go to the sex show.
Okay.
I love that.
I need to go back home.
We should have been working.
Let's have a sleepover, Hassan.
I'm going to bring a date.
You gaslight us all the time.
How?
I need to go back home so I can work out tomorrow.
When you were like, oh, I'm only a product presenter.
And I was like, be the co-host.
And you're like, I don't want to be the co-host.
I want to be the product presenter.
That wasn't gaslighting.
That was.
That is the definition of gaslighting.
No.
I think cutie just sometimes wants to complain.
I think that's what it is.
That's my favorite.
My favorite is.
No.
Gaslighting is something else.
To insinuate that you want a different role on the show, only to admit that you're happy with the role on the show to make us feel guilty is gaslighting.
No, gaslighting is me saying, Will, your hair is blue.
So your hair is blue.
So you want to be the product presenter.
Your hair is blue.
No, she wants to be a contestant.
But you told us you didn't want to be the contestant.
No, I just want to complain.
No, she wants to just complain.
That's what it is.
I can tell.
No, it's what don't you get it?
Do you have a vape, Marsh?
Women, women, women, ladies.
Women's mindset.
Cutie went girlfriend mode.
That's what that is.
But you know what?
It's beautiful, natural.
I want to complain.
My favorite hobby is complaining.
She wanted to complain and she wanted us to go, you know what?
You're natural and you're beautiful and you're right and you're valid.
We fucked up.
Touch me, just kidding.
You can touch me.
Oh, really?
Oh, God.
I just listen.
Was that we?
Can I?
This is, I'm going to be honest for a second.
This podcast is off the rails.
I just wanted Hassan to have fun.
And last night.
We had fun.
Despite his best efforts, he had fun.
No, and I got punished for it.
You didn't.
You're punishing yourself.
Everybody else was so proud of you.
Everybody was like, oh, Hasan was so fun last night.
Yeah, we was awesome.
We loved that, Hassan.
I hung out with you at the club last night.
We chatted for a few minutes.
It was great.
We gambled.
We had fun.
We danced.
We did.
We did do all those things.
I humped Seer.
Oh, yeah.
How long were you guys out for?
We were out till 5 a.m.
That's why it's funny when he was like, you were sleeping at the Blackjack.
I'm like, yeah, it was 5 a.m.
I went to bed.
I'm not going to lie.
The pit boss asked me.
She's like, is your friend okay?
I was like, yeah, he's just sad.
He's lost a lot of money.
It wasn't even that.
I was just tired.
No, I know.
You were just like this, though.
Also, she did fuck me.
Like, because she did.
Look, I'm a very, I'm a very particular gambler.
I play the book.
For those of you who don't know, in blackjack, there are like very specific rules of like what you do with mathematical probabilities.
But at the end of the day, if you're getting served 12s every fucking time, which is like one of the worst things that you can get because of the likelihood of a 10 or a king or, you know, something equivalent to a 10 is going to be served is much higher at a lower cost.
It didn't help that I just kept winning.
And I gave Will $400.
I was like, here, yeah, you don't have to go.
And I won $1,600 off that $400.
He just fucking kept.
And it was like, it was almost like a flex because he stopped playing and substituted.
I let my friend play who had never played Blackjack.
I had my friend who never played Blackjack and they're getting like 21s over and over again.
Shouts out.
I'm sitting there white knuckling through this fucking process and she keeps serving me 12s and giving me attitude.
And my friend who's never played before goes, is blackjack good?
Is that guys that are like shoveling money in front of her?
It's just like, I mean, it's fine, it's whatever, but it's still, it's still size.
It's not great.
It's not a great experience, you know?
I'm figuring out my sex show.
Cutie, you can actively participating.
She can't go.
You're letting her.
I've been helping.
I'm not letting her go.
I'm helping.
I've been helping.
Cutie, I haven't gotten a text yet about the sex show.
Are you texting me?
I'm asking Maya if you can go.
I have a plus one.
I need a plus one.
I know.
Okay, I'm sorry.
I said to Maya, I said, can Austin come or is it just the girls?
No, I'm so sorry.
I didn't mean to intrude.
And then she said, Austin can come, but I don't want boyfriends.
And I said, my boyfriend's not here.
And I said, wait, but can Austin's plus one come?
Oh.
Because it's not a boyfriend.
That's true.
That's true.
It's not a boyfriend, technically.
But I get what she means.
Look, I don't want to ruin the night.
I may kill you.
You don't even want to come.
I really want to come.
That's gaslighting.
He's been pretending wanting to come.
I want to go to this gaslighting.
I want to go to the sex show, but now I feel a little awkward and uncomfortable.
Okay, can we add something to the show?
Or whatever's playing?
Lud's literally playing Valor right now.
I just got a Discord notification from him.
He's playing Valorant?
Probably.
What?
Who is?
Dude, Lud's been a party animal.
Lud's been having fun.
Yeah, he has.
Honestly, I hit by one CO2 cannon last night and she was done.
They had CO2 cannons in the club last night and they go.
And I saw Judy's face go.
Yeah.
Like a cat.
Was that because that you walked past me?
She's like, I got to get the fuck out of here.
I got to go.
I got to go.
Yeah, it was hard.
It was a long time.
To be fair, it was very loud.
It was a lot.
It was embracing.
Funniest moment of the night.
You asked if Maddie on was Sapnap.
Yeah, he does look like Sapnap.
Who?
Sapnap.
Maddie.
Oh.
DJ.
He's a very famous DJ.
He's March's favorite DJ.
Oh, I'm sorry, March.
After last night, I call him Midian.
That's not nice.
What if he watched me?
He was so mad.
He was like, fuck you, dude.
You don't understand.
He put on a great show.
He put on a great show.
Was he the one pushing the CO2 buttons?
Yes.
Yeah, he was.
Yeah, it was him.
Oh, my piss.
Why are you defending him?
The club maked me.
No, that was Maddion.
He pisses me off.
Maddie on, you piss me off.
Yeah.
Those CO2 buttons were too bad.
I would like to apologize on behalf of the fear and podcast.
Don't push the CO2 buttons.
I like the buttons.
I like the CO2.
It was cold.
It was really hot in there, so I liked to get a little CO2.
I wish they would have pushed it more often, to be honest with you.
In fact, I wish they could have moved the CO2 buttons above the VIP section so we can get a little cool down.
I feel like.
By the way, we're talking about the offline TV party.
Sorry, none of us said what we were talking about.
Yeah, we went to the offline TV Dolce and Gabbana Razor party at Zuk.
Zouk is, of course, a part of this hotel that we're in, Resorts World.
It's the newest hotel on the street.
Why are you like sell it at?
Chilling.
That's what they bill it as.
Okay.
Let me tell you.
Okay.
It's falling apart.
This hotel is not.
It's a hotel, but still not great because Vegas fucking sucks.
Vegas does suck.
I love Las Vegas.
Yeah, it's built for both of you.
That's why I'm not.
I don't want to be here.
I don't want to be a little bit more than that.
I love Las Vegas.
I love Las Vegas.
Look at this.
Look at the lights.
Vegas is so.
It's so for basic.
I sat last night.
I don't want to be here, so I don't want to be here.
I want to be here.
I'm staying an extra day.
I sat last night at an Italian restaurant overlooking the Bellagio Fountain.
That was pretty awesome.
Yeah.
And Paris.
I'll be honest.
I don't even need to go to Paris anymore.
We got a better Eiffel Tower here.
Oh, God, you're so American.
It hurts my soul.
I'm going to say it.
We haven't even hung out.
Like, the four of us.
Oh, I wonder whose fault that is.
Whose fault is that?
No, no, the three.
All of us have been hanging out.
Even you have been on a record path.
I have been good for friendship this time.
Yeah, you've been.
Yeah, that's why I say even he.
I was hanging out.
I went to two dinners with them.
Am I the problem?
Yes.
It's me.
I'm the problem.
It's me.
You're the problem.
It's okay.
I'm the problem.
I've been the problem before.
It's okay.
Am I going to have to dress up as Woody and sing a song?
Yes, you are.
Actually, it's pretty funny because our group chat is literally me always asking, so what are we doing?
What's going on?
What are you guys up to?
And then QD is just like, oh, I have this ATT sponsored event.
And then Verizon is also an event.
And then Samsung's going to be a little bit more than $100.
I've been very quickly followed by a panel after that.
I have 15 minutes to do my hair and then I'm at another women's panel for women.
Yeah.
It's just like really.
I'm sorry.
You guys aren't women.
Maybe you'd have more opportunities.
Yeah.
Women have too many opportunities.
Let's discuss.
Look.
They need to stop this.
This weekend's in hell for me.
I'm barely.
Kitty, why did you do this to yourself?
Just say no.
You have the opportunity to say no to a lot of this.
Say no to these things.
For the grind.
For the money.
Begging For Cruise Vacations00:06:36
Wait, you're getting paid to do meet and greet me.
You're not getting paid to go to the fucking women's dinner.
Okay, FOMO for you guys.
We're doing a meet and greet, and I felt FOMO.
I felt bad, so I came.
This was awesome.
I heard you told Caroline we begged you to show up to the meet and greet.
No, no, I meant viewers.
Viewers were begging me.
It wasn't you guys.
You guys begged.
You would never.
You guys would beg, but I don't want to be.
If I knew you wanted to be bagged, I would have begged you.
No, I actually felt so bad.
I didn't even know.
I like that.
This is what.
I've never had a meet and greet for myself only.
Now, Twitch literally didn't even tell me.
It was Will's meeting greet, right?
It was Will.
It was the Will.
It was the Austin show.
Oh, Will Neff meet and greet featuring Hassan Piker.
Well, that's not happening.
Okay.
Twitch doesn't even ask anymore.
Twitch literally won't even pay for his fucking flight and hotel.
And they'd be like, oh, they paid for his flight and hotel.
No, this time they did.
But last time they did it, and I had to yell at them.
I was like, what do you mean?
You can't just like put him on the meeting greet and not even fucking cover his drip.
This is what happened.
So that's what they, that's how much they take it for granted.
They're like, oh, they put you on it in Paris and you weren't even let me.
That's what I mean.
Boys.
Let me tell this story.
So I'm not the women's dinner, okay?
This is not your time.
I know.
I'm skipping the fucking women's dinner to be here.
I'm trying to be at the women's dinner to bond with my women.
I just told them.
Sync our periods.
I told them no.
I'm afraid.
We never sink our periods on this podcast.
Okay.
Anyway, I show up.
I go to the purple anchor.
I'm really flustered.
I see Caroline walks out like she's been through a hurricane.
She's not well.
I'm like, are you okay?
And she's like, I need to get this charger to Will.
I said, I'm going to Will.
And she said, do you want me to take this?
She's like, no, I'll walk with you.
So she's walking with me.
Security will not let us to the meet and greet.
So I go to the, I say, I say, Caroline, and Caroline is getting surrounded.
She's getting swept.
She should have had her own fucking meet and greet.
Yeah.
So she's getting surrounded by photos.
And I'm saying, I'm ignoring them.
I'm walking.
I say, Caroline, stay here.
I'll be right back.
I run over to the other security.
I say, hey, I need to go to that meet and greet.
That's my podcast.
I said, mine.
I'm sorry.
I was trying to get it.
Oh, it's your podcast.
You're our queen.
I don't know.
I don't know.
You're a queen.
You are a part of the podcast.
They go, they go.
They go, we can't let you in.
I said, but I can Google it.
And they said, what?
And I Google Fear Ann.
And I said, see, those three boys, I'm the girl.
And they go, and I go, what?
What?
And I went and came and got you.
And so they were like, this is why you have to try harder.
And the whole time, the whole time I'm like, it's like, that's not you.
You're a girl is a little bit of a girl.
This is what yasify me in every picture.
They're like, that's not you.
Different girl.
You're a different girl than that one.
Nice try.
Subtitle gaslighting.
So then I go back over and I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I don't know.
I feel like I shouldn't even be here.
And I kept saying, they begged me to come.
They begged me to come.
And I met the fans.
And now I feel bad because Caroline's probably like, what the fuck are you talking about?
They don't beg for you.
And then, and then she asked, she asked, did you beg Cutie to come up to the podcast?
I was like, no, I was like, I was like, no, I was glad she showed up, but I don't think we begged her.
I feel bad now.
Now she probably thinks I have a complex.
No.
I have many complexes, but I'm not sure.
Caroline fucking adores you.
She shouldn't.
She thinks you have a complex.
That's crazy.
She shouldn't.
Nobody thought that until this very moment.
Well, then this is what happens.
Security lets me through and I go, Can she come?
She's his girlfriend.
And then, and then they're like, no, no, no.
And I was like, do you want me to take the charger to Will?
And she's like, yeah.
Can you pull up another photo?
Look, here they are.
I'm like, I was like, do you want me to take the charger to Will?
And I feel bad.
Like, I'm leaving Caroline out.
And then they let her come.
So that's good.
But then I felt bad because it felt like one of those things where I'm like leaving her on the Titanic and I get the boat and I'm like, well, see you later.
I got to get on the boat.
But then they let Caroline in and then I screamed you guys.
What I'm hearing is that security is kind of lax.
Yeah.
They really need to step their fucking shit up.
After you guys sent someone, we were able to get in.
One thing I will say one thing I will say about this entire weekend is it's been awesome to watch you guys work.
I've been so proud of all three of you.
Not Marsh.
You've been a fucking degenerate.
You lost too much money.
I'm sad.
Yeah, you're fucking.
Wait, even me?
I've been really proud of the three of you because it's not often that you get to just watch your friends do what they do at the highest level.
But all three of you, I watch you.
I'm like, damn.
Like, there's a reason that all three of these people are here.
You guys have been working your asses off.
I feel about you.
You've been incredible.
Thank you.
Every time someone comes up to you, I see you guys light up and give them a moment and really be genuine.
And it's just awesome to, you know, be able to appreciate your friends doing what they do at the highest level.
Thank you, Will.
I really appreciate that.
I really, that means a lot to me.
No, it does.
This is the most polar opposite.
You accept the compliment immediately.
She is just steaming like, what a crock of shit.
No, I think, no, it means a lot.
I'm so focused on it.
I feel like I ditched Caroline and I still feel bad about it.
No.
And I will never recover.
I love that.
I think we need a vacation together.
No, I don't.
That's not the solution.
Why not?
Because she can't fly.
We'll take a cruise.
I'll have to go on a plane and Will will have to hold me the whole time and you guys will have to be like, we're almost there.
We're almost there.
We're almost there.
Would you do it?
Would you be down and do it like that?
Because then fine.
How long is the flight?
On a cruise?
Wait, to where?
That's a much better question.
Have you noticed that?
How long can you gaslight me?
Wait, where are we going?
Are we going to Mexico?
We're going to Tulum.
Okay, I'll do it.
One hour.
Oh, all there is is clubs.
You saw me at a club.
I can't.
No, it's like yoga.
It's like hippie-dippy down in Tulum.
I like it.
Wait, is there like resorts and stuff?
Beautiful resorts.
That's the prettiest in Mexico.
Love that.
I do think that the food is mid, though.
Wait, can you rad?
Why don't you guys want to do a cruise?
We'll do a cruise.
No one likes cruises.
I love cruises.
I love cruises.
You get to sample multiple different countries.
That's so...
I'm going to say it.
That's so gay of you.
Yeah.
It is so fucking good.
The gays love cruises.
I'm not wrong.
All right.
Well, I'm not wrong.
Fine.
You can't even say anything.
It's true.
It's true.
Gays do love cruises.
We love them.
They have like specific cruelty.
And you know who else loves cruises?
Women.
And I just don't understand why you don't love cruising.
I don't like that you generalized.
Oh, okay.
Oh, yeah.
Okay.
All right.
Cutie, you and I, we're taking a cruise.
She goes, you know, it loves cruises.
Gays.
He's like, you know who else loves cruises?
Women.
She's like, I don't know.
This is some real, this is some real ladies and lunch.
We need to do therapy today.
Gays Love Cruises And Hot Sauce00:06:04
We should have a guest.
We should have a therapist.
We should just have Dr. K on.
Yeah, that'd be fun.
Oh, God.
The fear and therapy says.
Oh, that'd be so great.
I like that.
Don't do it.
Like the always sunny episode where it's just, it starts with who does the dishes and it just ends with them all breaking.
You cut me open, Doc.
Oh, God.
Oh, man.
I don't even have a voice.
No, I sound like shit.
Sorry, guys at home.
Yeah, we sound like shit.
I smell like I smell fuck.
What?
I sound like I've smoked three packs of cigars.
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm the only one who had a health and wellness trip, I guess, by fucking not doing anything and sleeping for the most part.
Hassan, you slept for six additional hours, maybe, than us.
Yeah.
One day.
Yeah, that's crazy.
Of a three-day trip, and now you're doing a podcast.
Yeah, it's not.
You might have a complex.
You and Cutie have a complex.
I do definitely.
Disney relax.
Okay, I'll get serious for a second.
The entire time I was here in Vegas, I felt like I felt like I was juggling two different universes where on the one hand.
You're not allowed to have fun because there's war on the other side of the country.
Yeah, where on on the on the one hand, I was like trying to keep up with everything that was going on, trying to, you know, be well-read, hoping that inevitably I'll be able to stream and also continue the fundraiser.
On the other hand, I was like, this is not my moment.
This is for everybody else.
Like, I'm here for them.
I have to just forget about that when I see a fan and like, you know, take a photo or go on stage and perform for Name Your Price.
So I did feel like I ended up, you know, giving not a lot of great performances for either.
And I think you killed it on Neme Your Price.
Your last year's performance sucked.
This year was amazing.
Oh, fuck.
What do you mean?
You hit it out of the park.
Everybody was telling me, God, Hassan was so good on Name Your Price.
You cleaned the house.
He just wants you to show up to Long.
260 points, and everybody's so everybody told me.
They come to me, they say, Hassan, oh my god, can't wait to see you.
I didn't let Austin rig it this year, and I could tell you're a pass.
I know you wanted to fucking say some of these points.
Because you even bet him, and you're like, I'm not going to redistribute your points.
And I saw you doing it, and I was like, He's played five times.
This is let him win.
It's let him win.
It's nuts.
It's fucking nuts.
And even then, at the end, I play ball all day because I thought you wanted to keep going.
So I was trying to lose on purpose on the last one because Will was like, Will put the 45-point one on.
And I was like, Okay, I know what the assignment is.
Like, I'm going to fucking take a dive here.
And I still, at the very end, was willing to fucking throw.
And then there was a little bit of miscommunication, but we were thrown over for like 35 minutes.
So yeah, it's okay.
It was great.
We did good.
It was a great show.
It was a great show.
Really big show.
So, what?
Oh, what are we at?
Tom Harris?
50 minutes.
Oh, 50 minutes.
Jesus Christ.
That was.
He's.
Did anybody else have any good moments at TwitchCon?
I went and walked the floor today and met so many people.
Yeah.
I love that.
That's my favorite.
At the beginning of the convention, it was really quiet.
Sure.
Everybody was a little skittish.
And then today, I just walked in and it was crazy every second.
Because everyone is panic mode.
They're like, I'm not going to see my favorite content creator, Austin's show.
Yeah.
Yeah, but today they were coming up, taking pictures.
A lot of them asking, where's Hassan Piker?
I said, he's busy.
Yeah.
He didn't have time for you today.
Oh, God.
I'm just kidding.
I didn't say that.
Because, like, that's what I'm saying.
I didn't say that.
You want to know what I'm thinking?
You want to know why I feel like shit?
Because in my mind, there's a fucking fan that came from Missouri that flew in.
Okay.
They wanted to meet me.
And was like, oh, I can't wait to see my favorite content creator, Hassan.
He's been so important in my life and my like political upbringing.
I watched him every day in 2020.
And like, I can't wait to finally put all the money together.
I can't wait to finally see him at TwitchCon.
And of course, they couldn't fucking get a ticket to the meeting greet because it sold out in like three and a half seconds.
So now they're like, oh, but I'll see him on the floor.
And then they never got to see me.
And that fucking like that hurts my soul thinking about that.
That's part of the reason why I feel like a piece of shit.
Look, I didn't mean well.
Then we should go walk the floor at the hotel.
There'll be people around.
Well, also, there's also the security asset.
You want to tweet?
We'll tweet about it.
What?
I'll put out a tweet to Hassan and come meet me at the sex show.
All fans come to the sex show to meet Hassan.
You know what the secret head of the entire con was, though?
Will Neff's hot sauce.
Oh, yeah.
Rave reviews.
It was all around.
That was really cool that you're giving Twitch sauce.
I traded your hot sauce for a naked photo of Blau.
What?
What?
That's not.
No.
No, somebody had a naked photo of Blau, and they're like, I'll give this to you.
Like, not naked, but like an underwear photo.
It was his mod.
He approved it.
It was fine.
Blau said it was okay.
Why does Blau's mods have those photos?
I was in the feels like you should.
No, it's cool.
Blau literally talked to me because he came up to me.
He's like, Did you get the naked photo of me?
I was like, Yeah, so no, this guy had a photo of Blau in like, not nude, but like in a tasteful nude, whatever.
And he had like this poster and he gave it to me.
And he said, I'll give this to you for some hot sauce.
I was like, great, bet.
So I went and got some hot sauce.
Yeah, Austin was definitely giving out sauce.
I was giving out sauce for sure.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Nefsauce.com.
Nefsauce.com.
How many more do you have to give out?
I'm going to do another giveaway on my stream using only channel points.
So that's cool.
Viewers can get it.
We could randomly throw some into tier three.
Yeah.
Like 10 random or 20 random tier three people.
And then I'm doing a thousand bottles a month for the next few months.
Selling Twitch Buffalo Machines00:04:25
I love your fucking shit.
Giving away a thousand selling it.
I was like, You've got to sell it at some point.
Yeah, I'm not making any money on it, though.
Are they for sale?
Yeah.
How much does it cost?
I think it's going to be $10 a bottle.
Well, you haven't even sold it.
Oh, come on.
You got to make some money off of it.
I just want to.
I'd say $12.99 is a great price.
Okay.
We'll think about it.
I think $15.
$12.99, I think, plus shipping and handling.
It's a pretty good deal.
$15, baby.
Absolutely.
I think $25 is a good price.
Yeah.
That way, Austin can get more jars of MMs.
That's right.
100%.
Yeah.
Or we can fucking get it.
Or we can pay off our wonderful producer's gambling debt before the Cali and Mafia breaks his fucking kneecaps.
How much did you?
I want to know.
Can you mouth it to me?
And a live reaction?
It's going to hurt you.
Really?
Write it on a note.
He's just going.
Look at Andre.
They're giving it to you.
Look at Andre.
He's giving it to you.
Oh, that's not that bad.
What?
That's not.
No, I think you're misunderstanding.
You want to do it again?
Wait, hold on, hold on.
Do it one more time.
Just fucking do the episode.
Are you serious?
Oh, Marsh, how do you lose that long?
Oh, that's not bad.
No, why don't you walk away?
Wait, that's not bad.
It's only like 20 MMs.
No, that's not as bad as I thought.
How did you get it so twisted?
I got it very twisted.
He got it so twisted.
Oh, my God.
That's so Hassan.
When he pulled up to the high roller table, they asked him for his loyalty card and he took the Train Rex card and slapped it.
The Train Rex card?
Yeah, the don't get it twisted card.
And the dealer picked it up and didn't know what it was and tried to scan it and then looked at it.
He goes, What is this?
Hassan goes, Don't get it twisted, dude.
I carry that shit everywhere with me.
That is in my wallet every fucking day.
Every day.
Because I get it twisted.
And I want Train to be by my side when I'm getting it twisted.
He might hate me, but you know, he's still with me every day.
Yeah.
He's, and he does this.
God, I.
That was awesome.
I feel like I want to gamble more.
Yes.
No, I'm not going to, but I'm not going to.
Oh, my God.
Until we leave.
Wait, friendship?
You have what?
I haven't lost until we're going to be able to do it.
That's so bad.
For those of you watching that didn't hear that, Marsh just said, I haven't lost until we leave.
No, he unironically.
I don't agree with me.
He unironically.
He's got a dingy mentality, dude.
He unironically did the meme where 99% of gamblers stop gambling before they win.
Before they win big, Marsh has officially gotten it twisted.
He's got it twisted.
No, you are, you need to go to rehab if you keep this guy going.
What the fuck's happening to you?
I'm not in Vegas.
He's having fun.
I think it's great.
I'm going to start gambling.
No, you're not.
You would never do that.
You'd never.
You would go to the penny clubs.
I'm going to get a little bit of a bunch of people.
You would go to the penny slots.
You'd lose 33 cents and be like, oh, oh, oh, no.
Last time the worst thing happened.
Last time I came to Vegas, I pulled 200 bucks out of the ATM and I went and played the low blackjack tables or whatever at the Cosmopolitan.
And I got there and I started winning a little bit, but it just was taking way too long to win because I was like the $15 table or whatever the hell it is.
And I just eventually was just like, I'm just going to stay here until I lose it all because the line was like out the door to get your freaking thing and it wasn't worth it.
For the record, that is literally how I gamble as well.
I will take out a finite amount of money knowing that I'm just going to lose it.
Like, this is my entertainment.
Yeah.
This is how much I'm going to lose.
That's how I feel.
I get this.
800 bucks.
Wait, how much did you gamble this weekend?
Like total?
You lost or you won?
I start at 300 and I'm at 800.
So I guess I'm up 500.
I've never won anything.
Oh, I will say, I did win that.
Have you heard of Buffalo?
Buffalo.
That gambling machine.
Buffalo, I won like $100 at the airport.
You were gambling at the airport.
Is that just a slot machine?
You said, have you heard of the Buffalo machine?
Have you heard of a slot machine?
You are the oldest person I know.
Winning At Airport Slots00:04:52
You are literally like.
Well, the shuffle board was full.
You're like an 83-year-old grandma.
I was going to play Baccarat, but it did look like the table was cut.
Listen, honey, it's not because of smoking.
I have a polyp.
I agree.
Look, I had a great time gambling at the airport.
I'm going to gamble again on the way out.
Nandre is here.
He just had to leave the room.
Nandre just.
He's a good hype, man.
Nandre has the best laugh.
You're such a particular person.
I love it.
You're like, yeah.
Yeah, you.
Am I eccentric?
Really?
Oh, but I don't even think.
I feel like I'm pretty normal.
Oh, my God.
We went to Sinatra's.
Oh, a very famous restaurant.
Austin pulls up in a tank.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Wait.
Bro, you look like a greaser.
Yeah, he looks like he looks like he's the guy who sold Frank Sinatra deli meat in the fucking.
Hey, Frank, you're back?
Gaba Ghoul for you.
He has black jeans on eight.
And tight black tank top and a leather jacket.
This is the best part.
This is the best part.
The server reads us the specials.
He's coming around.
Austin's looking at the menu.
He goes, Do you have any potato soup?
And the server goes, I'm sorry, what?
He goes, potato soup.
Why do you want that?
Did you think there was a special?
He goes, no, I was just going off menu.
And I assumed you'd have a potato-based soup.
Like the server went, no, we don't have a soup.
I wanted like a Zupa Toscana, you know, from like Olive Garden.
You know, they get that Zupa Toscana.
It's like the sausages.
They've got.
You guys got unlimited breadsticks.
No, they've got it.
Like, you know, like the scallop potatoes with the little.
It's a great soup.
It's one of my favorites.
And I thought, I thought maybe.
He was going off menu.
I thought just maybe.
Look, I showed up to Sinatra.
I was wearing a nice leather jacket and a tank top because, you know, and some baggy pants and Rick Owen shoes.
Okay.
I didn't think I looked that bad.
Immediately popped the jacket off.
Yeah.
You looked great.
Thank you.
You just looked like an extra from Greece.
Yeah.
You look like you were the.
You looked like that.
You were a jet and a jet all the way from your first cigarette to your last diet.
I'm in this new fashion era where I wear a tank top and a jacket.
Yeah.
He's trying to be Ludwig.
I just can't get over the random potato soup request.
I mean, look, they didn't have it.
I ended up having to get it.
Of course they didn't have it.
I ended up settling for the pumpkin soup.
I like going off book, though.
You're like, you guys have the Olive Garden soup, right?
Come on.
It's Italian.
That's Italian.
To be honest, it's Sinatra's.
It's New York Italian.
It's not Italian, Italian.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, like Olive Garden.
Are you Italian?
Oh, shit.
Nandre just told him to open up a can of orbs.
Yeah, the common section's going to be a war of Italian.
No, no, no, no.
Look, I love Italian.
My driver's Italian.
Okay.
Oh!
Oh!
He didn't even hit it with the My Best Ram.
Oh, no.
Look, I love Italian people.
I've been to Italy.
I've been to Italy.
Oh, okay, good.
Okay.
Yeah.
Okay.
I am stiffing a hotel for some pasta, though.
You are not allowed back into Italy after these tapes.
I haven't paid for that pasta.
I will say this.
I go to Carbone a lot when I come out here, usually, and it's all right.
It's like they have good food, but they also are very flashy, Instagram-focused, and I don't like that.
I hate that shit.
However, Sinatra, I thought it was like a gimmick restaurant because it's fucking Sinatra.
For Frank Sinatra, you know what I mean?
And no one likes that guy.
No, but like I, not that, but like, I just thought it was a gimmick.
It was a gimmick restaurant.
It's not like I didn't realize that it would have good food.
Pasta was kind of mid.
I will say that.
The Agnolanti was incredible that you had with the white truffles.
Decadent.
And he was liberal with those truffles.
Oh, yeah.
He fucking.
He was shaving like it was going out of style.
Yeah, he was shaving at like Austin shows eating fucking $8 M ⁇ Ms. Each individual M ⁇ M is a good thing.
They were delicious MMs.
I'm going to have some more.
I forgot the M ⁇ Ms that I. You took the M ⁇ Ms and you didn't eat them?
I forgot them.
They're in my room.
I'm going to finish them later.
You took the MMs?
Didn't eat them?
I called it.
I told you that that's.
Sinatra Gimmick Restaurant Pasta00:01:22
Guys, let me leave it with this.
We give each other a lot of shit, but let me reiterate.
I was so proud of the three of you.
You are incredible.
I don't like when you do this because we're all bad at giving compliments back and you deserve compliments.
No, it's Will deserves compliments.
You all love me and your life.
Will, you are an incredible creator.
And thank you for including me because I sometimes feel not included.
Yeah, you don't even claim our podcast.
I know, but I've started to.
I'm working on it.
It's really fucked up.
And thank you for carrying me in the elevator, and I'm going to need you to carry me down.
I'll carry you.
Because you guys carry me on this podcast.
Aw.
All right.
Patreon.com/slash fear and paywall time where we're going to do a white hat.
It's a very special episode.
Austin's show is going to war with the hospitality industry.
Why are you leaving right now?
Wait until he's walking over.
It's not going to.
Oh, he's got a phone.
He's pulling the phone out of the wall.
He's pulling the phone out of the wall.
Okay, they're going to swap seats.
Not yet.
Okay.
He's going to call.
Wait, wait, wait until we get to the camera.
Wait.
We're doing it for the Patreon episode.
I'm leaving.
Yeah.
Because I've got to go to the sex show.
I'll cry if I miss it.
It's the only thing I've wanted to do all weekend.
You can use my mic for the phone.
Look, I'm useful.
All right.
Wait, you're not leaving.
I am.
No, no.
Tell them you're staying so they'll be.
I'm staying for the Patreon and I'm showing my boobs.