| Time | Text |
|---|---|
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Drive to Marbella
00:04:49
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|
| Do you see dice? | |
| Any dice on this table? | |
| Is there any dice on this table? | |
| No guys, this ain't a fucking game. | |
| No, this ain't a game. | |
| Take confidentiality. | |
| Transfer under the embassy network self subsidised police car accompanied by a crew of bloodthirsty | |
| I'm driving a Ferrari F12 through Spain. | |
| I'm going to the Pyrenees Mountains. | |
| I'm going to tear it up all the way to Marbella. | |
| After Marbella, I've got to fly back on a private jet to London, pick up the Rolls-Royce Tristan bar, get in the Rolls, drive to Warsaw, Poland, where I left my 812 Superfast. | |
| I've been sitting there for six months. Get in that, | |
| drive back to Romania and get home just in time to relax for a week before I go to Ukraine, Kiev for the Operator Summit, the War Room Summit. | |
| I don't understand how you've met. | |
| And this is a message to all men on Twitter. | |
| This is not just the people who follow me. | |
| I see people with big Twitter accounts, big following. | |
| How you live an existence so mundane. | |
| Where is your action? | |
| Where's your adventure? If you look at my feed, it's non-stop adventure. | |
| If you guys are just like, I went to the gym, I read a book, gonna cook dinner now. | |
| What the fuck are you doing with your fucking life? | |
| You're a man. And the most masculine essence is to seek risk, to seek adventure. | |
| That's what you're supposed to do as a man. | |
| This is why I never believed the corona shit when all you did, did. | |
| You ate it up and lapped it up because you've been conditioned to start thinking like a female. | |
| Safety. Oh, let me just look after the kids. | |
| Oh, duh, duh, duh. Men, we're not supposed to be safe. | |
| We're supposed to get in cars with a hangover and drive as fast as humanly possible across foreign lands looking for pussies. | |
| That's what we're supposed to do. | |
| I really am amazed that when I look on the Twitter feeds of all these other people who are successful, all of their lives are brutally mundane. | |
| Brutally! And they can say, oh, but I'm just happy reading a book. | |
| Well, that's good for you. You're just happy reading a book. | |
| But if you're going to go through life and you're not going to seek adventure and take risks, as I do, permanently, then you need to accept a part of you has become feminine. | |
| That's the reality, because they're out here doing shit. | |
| It's not a big deal. | |
| It's just a reality. | |
| It's a reality. | |
|
Can't Handle the Turns
00:14:12
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|
| It can't do it! It can't do it! | |
| I'm kicking the fuck out of this MTL. They changed something to it, so it just simply cannot handle the turns. | |
| Superfast better? Yeah, Superfast takes us all day. | |
| You keep saying they're my mates, they're your mates. | |
| Look, who are all your friends? These are all your friends. | |
| Look at them. I thought nobody liked you. | |
| Ah, you know whose fucking friends they are? | |
| Fucking Tristan's. | |
| They're Tristan's friends. Yeah, they're definitely Tristan's friends. | |
| Look, they're about to greet him. Yeah, yeah, Tristan's friends. | |
| They're all going to greet him. Yeah, yeah, Tristan's friends. | |
| Yeah, they're definitely Tristan's fucking friends. | |
| Typical. Typical Tristan. | |
| Yeah, that is what Tristan does. | |
| Yep. Always has so many friends. | |
| Yep. Fucking loser. Ah, so you tried to say they're Tristan's mate, but they're your mate. | |
| They're all my mates, yeah. They're all your mates. | |
| Look, they're all my mates. | |
| They're all your mates. | |
| I'm in it. I knew. No, no, no. | |
| I'm in it now. Finally. | |
| They're all my mates. All your mates. | |
| How'd you get all these mates in Spain? | |
| We all talk about how we hate you. It's fair. | |
| Nobody likes me. Nobody likes you. | |
| So what we talk about is the I hate Luke appreciation. | |
| I understand now. | |
| This is the I hate Luke group. | |
| Nice. Welcome to the real world, Lou. | |
| This is the real world. | |
| Confirmed. I can drink more than Tristan and I can drink less than you. | |
| Easily. Guaranteed. | |
| 100%. You can't drink my snuff. | |
| 100%. It's not Marcel. | |
| He seems confident. Bro, this is the life I live. | |
| You can't want to drink better than me. | |
| Bro, I can be more sober than you can be. | |
| And I can be more drunk than you can be. | |
| No, but that's what I mean. You can't have both. | |
| I just saw you do it. | |
| Bro, I can do it at the same time. | |
| Remember that time? Yeah, I remember that time. | |
| You remember that time? I remember that time. | |
| There's that time. | |
| I had loads of alcohol, loads of war, bread, a keto. | |
| That's how it is. | |
| You can't treat me less than me. | |
| And I'm super ready for that competition. | |
| Listen, I'll bet you both at the same time. | |
| I'll drink more than you, and stay more sober than you. | |
| Ooh, that's actually a doable bet. | |
| You might stay more sober than me. | |
| He has to drink more than you. | |
| Where are the shots? You already did this. | |
| Where's the shots? I'm here. | |
| You're here. He's kind of here. | |
| Where's the shots? Where's the shots? | |
| Andrew, where's the shots? I don't need shots. | |
| No one needs shots. | |
| Welcome to the real world, Luke. | |
| Yes. | |
| In the real world, you drag supercars around the world and order thousands of pounds of food and just drink endlessly. | |
| No, steal other people's shit. | |
| This is someone else's drink. | |
| She literally just brought four beers. | |
| Four beers. For someone else that we've taken. | |
| It's true. No, they don't want the smoke. | |
| No, I'm a booze pirate, you see. | |
| I take what I want, I give nothing back. | |
| All the booze. You can take mine, give none back. | |
| Boy, matey. Or maybe. | |
| No, you can't give it back to me. | |
| No, but you can take it. That's yours though. | |
| If it's yours, you can't give it away. | |
| But you're a pirate. Marcel, why do you do this? | |
| There's something in my DNA. No, but the eight double whiskeys is coming. | |
| It's real. There's something in my DNA that doesn't let me back down for anything. | |
| Regardless of what it is. | |
| Even if I can't do it, I will do it. | |
| He's a superhero. I'll give it to Marlon. | |
| Do you believe in X? | |
| I still believe in X. | |
| Sacks bro. | |
| Fuck man, brainwash, brainwash. | |
| Sacks. | |
| Now this, to the uneducated viewer, they would think this is vodka and apple juice. | |
| But is it? | |
| Southern comfort and sparkling? | |
| What is this, Moscow? | |
| That's 100% whiskey. | |
| Why'd you do this? | |
| I told... It was gonna come! | |
| Do you see dice? | |
| Is there any dice on the table? | |
| There's no dice. This ain't a fucking game. | |
| This ain't a game. | |
| Two of the same cards. | |
| Two of the same? No, it's not the same card. | |
| That's the Huracan. It's the Huracan Evo. | |
| He diced on his best. He diced. | |
| Huh? He didn't dice. | |
| He played cards. I don't see any playing cards. | |
| Why don't you tell him what? Do you see any playing cards? | |
| No. Because this ain't no game! | |
| This ain't no fucking game! | |
| This ain't a fucking game. | |
| What's up, what did you do to us? | |
| Why'd you do this? | |
| You don't like booze either! | |
| Why'd you do this? | |
| He doesn't like booze! | |
| He's not a boozer! | |
| There's a lesson you learned here, kids. | |
| Always fuck it up. | |
| Uncle Marcel's lesson of the day. | |
| I want that. Uncle Marcel's lesson of the day. | |
| We're all proud of ourselves. | |
| Lesson of the day. | |
| Can I see it? | |
| Please don't touch my hand. | |
| Alright, go in. | |
| Let's go do it. | |
| Jesus Christ. | |
| I thought that was a person. | |
| No way did Luke just... | |
| Sorry Andrew Russell. | |
| No way did Luke just beat you both up. | |
| Just beat you both up. | |
| I'm out of stuff. | |
| I saw the whole thing. He added to Spark and War, but Luke didn't... | |
| No? Luke did beat you up. | |
| Death before is better than death after. | |
| So, are you adding his cousin? | |
| What did you say? You might be adding his... | |
| What did you just say? It's horrible. | |
| He doesn't realize it's trash. | |
| It's evil. He's gonna realize. | |
| About now. You see. | |
| You see. You see there. | |
| You see the pain. You guys couldn't see it because I didn't have the camera turned towards me. | |
| But that's the pain I felt. You see the pain. | |
| Repeat me. | |
| I'm not doing that. It's evil. | |
| It's evil. You finally beat me. | |
| It's evil. I will not down that right now before I eat my food. | |
| I know. I will feel horrible for the next three days. | |
| I'm going to eat, I'm relaxed, half an hour, and then I'll drink. | |
| I'm not doing it though. | |
| I'm not doing it. | |
| I'm not doing it. I'm not doing it. | |
| You did this to us. | |
| This didn't need to be real. | |
| Kids, fuck up. | |
| Listen, when you dance with the devil, you wait for the music to stop. | |
| That's why I don't start dancing. | |
| He likes to dance. He's a good dancer, huh? | |
| He keeps dancing. | |
| He keeps starting the dance. | |
| Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale room like this? | |
| No, I mean, I have. | |
| I don't like it. All the desserts. | |
| All the desserts, yeah. All the desserts. | |
| Can I have four mojitos, please? | |
| I knew this, that's why I brought it all now. | |
| Vodka and Red Bull. | |
| Vodka and juice. | |
| That eats you. | |
| I'm going dessert. | |
| No hot chocolate, thanks. | |
| Seriously, that's not dessert. | |
| Is it? | |
| Dessert means like ice cream, brownies, cookies, sweet, delicious, yeah, man. | |
| Poison yeah, and then it's not poison That's dessert A chocolate lava cake. | |
| Some sweet tea. | |
| I didn't even want dessert and you still ordered me your version of dessert. | |
| Two of them. Two servings. | |
| It doesn't make sense. | |
| The world's tomorrow. | |
| I still have my beer. | |
| F*** | |
| I want to change the way we live. | |
| It just doesn't make sense. | |
| How can X be real? | |
| X are real, bro. Listen, I've been thinking about this for a long time. | |
| Put some real time in. | |
| I think it's actually one of the biggest problems in the world is that the powers that be have convinced everyone that eggs are real. | |
| Bro, eggs have to be real. | |
| How can they be real? Dinosaurs come from eggs. | |
| And chickens. And birds. | |
| Yeah, bro. And lizards. | |
| From eggs. Black and fried them and eat them. | |
| That makes sense. That doesn't make any sense. | |
| Could you eat a dinosaur? | |
| You might have got me there. Have you ever eaten a dinosaur? | |
| No. Maybe eggs aren't real. | |
| See, eggs aren't real, bro. And they're hard on the outside and soft on the inside. | |
| Doesn't add up. Doesn't add up. | |
| Sounds like sacks to me. | |
| It just sounds like a big conspiracy. | |
| I ordered eggs on the boat. | |
| They brought me some potato crushed up. | |
| Like, I'm not stupid, bro. | |
| That's true. You did order the eggs. | |
| like stereo. | |
| with this mediocre clip. | |
| Now, Black black black black. | |
| Black. | |
| Yes, sir. | |
| Is that conductors? | |
| Diver, come on please. | |
| Really upsets me it pisses me off actually They're going to go through all this effort. | |
| All these police, they're armed, cars, all this shit, just to try and pretend eggs are real. | |
| Is that what this is about? Yeah, of course it is. | |
| What else is it about? So they stopped me now. | |
| They're saying, taking my license. Because I said eggs wasn't real. | |
| I was driving to speed the man then. | |
| No problem. No problem with the way you're driving, but we heard your opinions on eggs. | |
| Where do they hear your opinions? I don't know. | |
| They must have microphones around. | |
| So now the egg patrol about to take my license. | |
| Do you believe in eggs? Do you believe in eggs? | |
| Eggs? Yes, do you believe in them? | |
| What kind of eggs? Any eggs. | |