| Time | Text |
|---|---|
|
Castle House Aikido
00:02:46
|
|
| We need pancakes. | |
| That's the worst commercial media ever. | |
| Good will never change! | |
| Good will never change! | |
| They come and they take back everything. | |
| Good will never change! | |
| Good will never change! | |
| This is actually a castle. | |
| No, this is a very nice house. Castle House. | |
| If you put the Bugatti Shiro on here, you've got the ultimate house. | |
| Do you know what this is? I do. | |
| It's something I've been developing. It's Castle House Aikido. | |
| Castle House Aikido. Never been done before. | |
| Now we'll wait at the front. What? | |
| Our house is nice, and it's a million dollars, and it's where millionaires do live, but this is a millionaire's house. | |
| Yeah, but do I have enough bitches to fill this house? | |
| Oh, easy. Do you think? | |
| Easy, bro. I think this house has 34 rooms, though. | |
| This gate is a little narrow. | |
| I was thinking the same thing, especially with that little device. | |
| With these sensors here, open, open, I don't know what cars will fit here, but you'll have to widen that gap. | |
| Yeah, you'll have to knock it back here. Where? | |
| I'm not scratching my car. Oh, of course. | |
| It's not worth it. Even the headache of having to be careful every time. | |
| Or it does need to widen the gate. I'm a little mad. | |
| This is a fact of the union. It's awesome. | |
| Do you know why? Because in 1904, whoever was living here was Captain Romanian moneywags. | |
| He was, wasn't he? Yeah. | |
| Past life. Past life. | |
| Did you know about reincarnation? | |
| You have to have a garden or do all the flowers. | |
| Yeah, Rose Garden. | |
| That is G. | |
| And if you start picking up a phone number, the phone number is saved. | |
| The phone number applies, maybe you don't have it in your hand, it's, uh, okay, set it. | |
| And this is a common practice. | |
| So this is a B category one. | |
| This is what we use. | |
| We call this... | |
| Thank you. | |
| Servant entrance. Nice. | |
| Servant stairs. Yep, servant stairs. | |
| This would be the office of power. | |
| This would be the office of power. | |
|
Servant Stairs
00:06:41
|
|
| This would be the office. You're going to see the purity of art and amazing. | |
| There are ears in your apartment. | |
| There used to be a baroque villa there. | |
| Something that destroyed it. This must be the place. | |
| This must be the place. | |
| What is that? | |
| That's a parking roof. | |
| That's a parking roof. | |
| I just want to go up to the ceiling. | |
| I hope it's not too much gold for you. | |
| Never enough gold. | |
| I really like it. | |
| It's really gold. Very nice. | |
| Gold like this. They worked off on three years. | |
| Two years. It's beautiful. | |
| There's no possibility for furniture to come in. | |
| The house is the furniture they had inside the floor. | |
| They wanted to get rid of it. I'm kind of looking for a house. | |
| I have to do anything. I think we can provide some, uh, some designers who can run the camera. | |
| You want a designer here. | |
| Yeah, so you want all designers to go to the castle. | |
| So good. They're selling like this, with some furnished. | |
| Cool. Those girls can buy a castle. | |
| I did say it. | |
| So can buy a castle. It's a big deal to prepare gold leaf, right? | |
| Yes. | |
| Gold. Gold. Gold. | |
| Gold? | |
| Don't do anything else. | |
| Don't do anything else. | |
| Gold shawl. Just a moment. | |
| Fuck. | |
| I'm a Trillionaire. | |
| This is perfect. | |
| Nice. I'm sure I'm on the gazebos. | |
| Bluebees. I'm sure I'm on the blue man. | |
| I'm on the gold pool man. | |
| Gold pool man. | |
| Yeah, I changed the tiles for golden tiles. | |
| That would be serious. Need a place for emergency meetings. | |
| We play smoke and drink. | |
| Alright, what do we do in our show? | |
| That is not a game. | |
| It is a game. Smoke and drink is not a game. | |
| A game we're all getting very good at. | |
| The smoke and drink game. | |
| Like Cuban. You just put 40 bottles of alcohol in the sriracha. | |
| Why would you order those if that wasn't a game? | |
| Emergency. Look. | |
| We need pancakes. We don't. | |
| That's the worst emergency ever. | |
| We need pancakes. Can we at least go eat steak? | |
| No. I found a place... | |
| I don't care what you found. | |
| I found a place that sells good pancakes and we can go right now. | |
| I don't want pancakes. We have millions of dollars. | |
| Nothing's stopping us. There's nothing stopping us walking in and sitting down having pancakes. | |
| There's nothing stopping us doing anything! | |
| I like pancakes. Pancakes. | |
| Or I can get some girl to come and cook me eggs and bacon. | |
| And eat eggs and bacon. | |
| And black coffee. Do they have eggs and bacon at the pancake place? | |
| I don't want pancakes. So, do you want to go, yes or no? | |
| No. What rider do you know? | |
| Go. He got him. | |
| You said no, didn't you? | |
| You said no, which means go. | |
| Yeah, go! Woo! | |
| Tristan, I'm very excited for pancakes. | |
| Pancakes are very good. You have to come. | |
| Roll as a team. I know, I have to go. | |
| I'm a full grown man. Pancakes. | |
| I'm excited. Pancakes? | |
| I don't want pancakes. I eat pancakes and chicken at once. | |
| It's not revolutionary. That is revolutionary. | |
| Black people in America, man. | |
| It's called chicken and waffles. It's the chicken and pancakes. | |
| Chicken and pancakes. Dickhead. | |
| They didn't even get pancakes. | |
| Look at him. Didn't even get pancakes. | |
| I don't want them. I'm living in a dream. | |
| So you tell me you don't want pancakes. | |
| No. You tell me these don't look good. | |
| It's time to wake up and face the real world. | |
| What are you talking about? You're living in a fucking dream. | |
| He is, isn't he? He's inside the matrix. | |
| He's refusing to wake up and see what's currently in front of his eyes. | |
| Pass me some. How it makes you feel, that's what it means. | |
| Exactly. It does make me feel pretty bad. | |
| I did want some. Don't worry, Tristan, maybe ask me. | |
| I can pass. I can reach it. | |
| You have to reach it. Tristan, I can reach this hole. | |
| I mean, you don't have to get up. I'll have to move it again. | |
| That's fine. You wouldn't eat your fucking pancakes. | |
| And you will pay the ultimate price. | |
| That did happen. This is punishment to me. | |
| This is punishment. Why do I become a millionaire if you won't eat your fucking pancakes? | |
| Yeah, keep smoking that Cuban. | |
| You're going to regret it. We're going to regret it. | |
| We're going to regret it. I won't. | |
| Get him with whoopies and boos. | |
| Whoopies and boos. He's got two things he's not used to. | |
| His weakness. His weakness. His trip tonight. | |
|
Booze And Parties Tonight
00:02:31
|
|
| What? | |
| We're gonna fix the roof. | |
| Okay. | |
| I forgot your name, babe. | |
| But I'm gonna take you home tonight. | |
| And if it's all the same, babe. | |
| I promise I'm gonna do you right. | |
| This party's off the chain, babe. | |
| I swear that I remember your face, but I forgot your name, babe. | |
| Sorry baby, I forgot your name. | |
| What's your name, baby? | |
| You need to come near. | |
| I'ma take you home tonight. | |
| And if it's all the same, babe. | |
| I promise I'ma do you right. | |
| This party's off the chain, babe. | |
| I swear that I remember your face, but I forgot your name, babe. | |
| Sorry baby, I forgot your name. | |
| What's your name, baby? | |
| You need to come near. | |
| I'ma take you home tonight. | |
| And if it's all the same, babe. | |
| I promise I'ma do you right. | |
| This party's off the chain, babe. | |
| I'ma take you home tonight. | |
| And if it's all the same, babe. | |
| I'ma take you home tonight. | |
| The club's a little loud, so it's hard to hear. | |
| I'll drink or have a beer. Well, let's make it fast. | |
| I ain't buying champagne till I've seen that ass. | |
| I need to know your name, but it's all the same. | |
| Too many years I done played in this fucking game. | |
| I had a lot of love way before the fame. | |
| I don't feel drained. Every day I make it rain. | |
| Baby, baby, give me the first and last. | |
| I got the high-tech. | |
| I'm a DJ, I'm a tech, I'm a DJ, I'm a DJ, I'm a DJ. | |
| I'm a star, I'm a star, I'm a DJ. | |
| I'm a DJ, I'm a DJ, I'm a DJ, I'm a DJ. | |
| I'm a DJ. | |
| Yo. | |
| What's up? | |
| I'm gonna burn the whole club down. | |
| Because Tristan wouldn't need his fucking pancakes. | |
| Tristan! So they've caught us. | |
| Police are not there. We have to party silently. | |
| The police are here. We have to party silently. | |
| The police are not there. Fine. | |
| I know enough Romanian. | |
| I told you, I told you. | |
| Pull it off. | |
| Bully Bosh. | |
| Pull it off. | |
| Police. | |
| Okay, I know, but if you just tell them Bully Bosh is a cop. | |
| I think Bully Bosh is a cop. | |
| I hear that, and it'll stop. | |
| I don't know, I don't know. | |
| I think the, uh, he's not drinking police are here. | |
| Oh, the Luke's not drinking police are here? | |
| Yeah, they're here to get Luke. | |
| Because Luke's not drinking enough food, the police have come. | |
| Ah, fuck. | |
| That's what's happening. | |
| There's one answer, Luke. | |
| I'm sorry, guys. | |
| There's only one answer. | |
| The fucking booze police. | |
| The booze police. Have they catch me? | |
| They caught you. We gotta tell them. | |
| You gotta tell them. Who told them? | |
| They knew. They watched Pay Confidential. | |
| It's not here yet. | |
| They watch it in the future. | |
| Sit. And they travel back in time. | |
| To let me know. Because you don't drink. | |
| Fuck. 26 hours of flying and Luke's saying, oh, the Talos is scared to keep drinking because he has 26 more hours in the sky. | |
| Luke's challenged you to a booze straightener. | |
| I've never asked a challenge yet. A booze straightener. | |