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Why Only Functional Drinks?
00:02:21
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| I only... You're gonna hate this one, by the way. | |
| I only drink functional drinks. | |
| If I'm gonna put something in my body, I want it to have a function. | |
| Like, I need food to live. | |
| And I need liquid to live. | |
| But if I'm gonna drink liquids, I like to drink functional liquids. | |
| When people drink non-functional liquids, I just think, why? | |
| So I've limited my liquids that I consume to the following. | |
| Water, because it hydrates me. | |
| There's random few guys in my house making noise. | |
| Too many women. | |
| Anyway. | |
| Water, because it hydrates me. | |
| Coffee, because it gives me energy of some sort. | |
| Or a Red Bull or an energy drink, because there's a point to it. | |
| I might have an orange juice because it's got some vitamins in there, for example. | |
| Alcohol, because I'll get drunk. | |
| Like, if I look at a liquid, I like to see what's the end result of consummation besides the fact that it hydrates me. | |
| That's the reason I don't drink Coke. | |
| The fuck does Coke give you? | |
| Nothing. | |
| Why drink Coke? | |
| Why the fuck would you spend three pounds on a Coke when you can have an orange juice, a coffee, and a water? | |
| If you have an orange juice, a coffee, and a water, you get hydrated, you get energy, and you get vitamins. | |
| You get three things! | |
| You drink a Coke, you get absolutely fucking nothing. | |
| Whatever you drink, whatever you consume in a liquid form should have a function. | |
| Now, I'm not saying it has to be healthy. | |
| I'm saying it has to be functional. | |
| Alcohol's not healthy, but sure, I'll shoot vodka all night. | |
| Which female keeps coming in and out the door? | |
| Filming. | |
| Woman. | |
| Anyway. | |
| It needs to have a function. | |
| You can't be just consuming pointless calories, wasting your life fucking drinking away on your Coca-Cola like a fucking dickhead. | |
| No. | |
| Look at what you're about to drink and find a function in it. | |
| Even if it's negative for your health, if it gets you drunk, that's absolutely fine, but functional liquids are the only thing you should be drinking, gentlemen. | |
| We live in a hard world. | |
| It's not easy out here. | |
| You haven't got time to be consuming something that doesn't give you at least a chance of getting superpowers. | |
| Like Mario. | |
| When he gets a fucking mushroom, he grows big and strong. | |
| He wouldn't just run around eating mushrooms that don't do shit, would he? | |
| No. | |
| Same with fucking liquids. | |
| Food? | |
| Yeah. | |
| Food's food. | |
| Whatever. | |
| I'm not even a big believer in a strict diet. | |
| I eat whatever the fuck I want. | |
| Eat some fruit and vegetables. | |
| Eat some fucking Kentucky Fried Chicken. | |
| It all works out fine at the end if you go to the gym enough. | |
| As for liquids, your shit needs to be functional. | |