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Welcome to our special weekend show, Sunday Uncensored.
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Now enjoy the show.
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Jill Biden.
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is being ripped by the right, I'll do air quotes, for saying the Hispanic community are as unique as breakfast tacos.
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Oh my gosh.
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Okay.
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Hell yeah, dude.
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Tacos and burritos.
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The right rips Jill Biden.
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Can I just give a simple, fuck you, the hill.
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Come on.
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We have this from the NAHJ.
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NAHJ encourages FLOTUS and a communications team to take the time to better understand the complexities of our people and communities.
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We are not tacos.
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Our heritage as Latinos is shaped by various diasporas, cultures, and food traditions.
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Okay.
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Wait a sec.
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Real quick.
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Was that a real quote saying we are not tacos?
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Yes.
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Amazing.
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It's right there, brother.
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You can read it.
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Hell yeah, dude.
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It's its own paragraph.
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We are not tacos.
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National Association of Hispanic Journalists.
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Right.
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Hispanic journalists.
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These are not right-wingers.
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So this is how... fucking stupid.
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Oh my gosh.
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Yeah.
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I like that.
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The Biden family... The cut of your jib.
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The cut of my jib.
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Well, here we go.
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We'll kick it off with that.
► 00:01:25
Jill Biden said, Hispanics are as unique as tacos.
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She also said, the Bogotas of the Bronx.
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What is Bogota?
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Bodega.
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Oh, bodega.
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A bodega is a corner store in New York.
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She's being a hashtag ally.
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Latinx.
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Bogota's a city in Spain.
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Maybe that's what she got.
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Bogota?
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Yeah.
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Bogota.
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B-O-G-O-T-A.
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Yeah.
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She's got the D and the G mixed up.
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She's like a step away.
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Generic food they could have picked.
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Yeah.
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It's like Italians are as unique as spaghetti.
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Can I just point out something weird?
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Look at this.
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It says the Hill has removed its comment section as there are many other forums for readers to participate in the conversation.
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We invite you to join the discussion on Facebook and Twitter.
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This is Google's results are rapidly changing.
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They will not allow any kind of feedback on this, because they know it's wrong.
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What we wanted to do, we don't have comments anymore, and I don't want to say too much, because we're working on censorship-resilient comment systems.
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That's what we're trying to do.
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I do think it's weird how this thing happened where you can't comment anymore.
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Why?
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Because people would just respond with racisms or something?
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Is that what they're worried about?
► 00:02:30
You guys know about the dead internet theory?
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No.
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We talked about it before.
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The idea is that around 2016 the internet completely died.
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Corporations came in, most content is not user-generated anymore, most profiles are bot accounts, and it's to simulate acceptable public opinion to control the narrative.
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It's like the horror movie where it's like, but she died 25 years ago.
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Yeah, exactly.
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But then you think about how all of a sudden comment sections everywhere are getting removed and it's like, that's weird.
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A lot of this is like login with Facebook shit.
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So they use Facebook comments on the... That's probably it.
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...centralizing it.
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Too much vulnerability.
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Yeah.
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You might be right.
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They just don't want to take on the responsibility of like a five... What do they call it?
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The 230, Section 230 reform bullshit that they go back through all their stuff and they're like, take this down, take this down, take this down.
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Right.
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I think, I think it's partly to like similar with YouTube, how they got rid of the dislike button.
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Like it's still there, but you can't see it anymore.
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Yeah, only the people that have the page can see it now.
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And I think the issue is, that New York nuclear attack thing, there's no comments, Joe Biden, there's no comments or likes and all that stuff, because then people would... You know what?
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The dead internet theory is kind of real, but not real in the way they think.
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The fact that all these news outlets got rid of their comment sections, the fact that Like, so many of these YouTube videos from the government
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don't allow you to comment at all.
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So you can't actually see the dissent. You can't see that people would be like,
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we don't like Jill Biden. She's dumb as a fucking box of rocks and she's a racist.
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No.
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They get rid of all that.
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Well, they'd just be accurate.
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Now Joe, Hunter Biden, he called Asian people yellows.
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Oh.
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Hunter Biden called Asians yellow in text exchange with Cousin.
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Was he ordering one?
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Yes.
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Goodness gracious.
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Yes.
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Was he really?
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Yes.
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He's like, give me a yellow to drag across state lines.
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And then he hits a gong.
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Here's the text.
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She's a legend.
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Make him sing Deck the Halls in a very racist fashion while I eat Christmas dinner.
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That would be a funny bit.
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Like, didn't someone do a bit where they hired hookers, and when they showed up they said, we want you to clean the floors, and they went, fuck you, no!
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Why would you degrade me?
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End me over like a real man.
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Look at this, look at this.
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Bend me over like a real man.
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Look at these texts.
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She's a legend.
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None of these women except for Diva, but Nicola and Diva and Ella and Lucy will all know quality
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girls who are like I am, distrusting and highly, highly wary of evil.
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I also have Denise, a German, 26.
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No to Lucy, I think.
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Okay, so fine.
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Do you want a foreign or domestic?
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And you have to make the pitch directly.
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I can't give you fucking Asians.
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Sorry, I'm not doing it.
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Domesticated foreigner, it's fine.
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I'd give you Isabella, but she has kids.
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And an NBA ex-husband.
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No yellow.
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Yasmina.
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Like, what the fuck are they talking about?
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What is this about?
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He looks like he's getting ready to buy the services of a woman.
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And she's looking at different matrons to put him in touch with.
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You may not like the Lakers.
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They're haggling ladies.
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Okay, so that's him and his cousin.
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How much do you think they hooked up?
► 00:05:38
Is that the one that gave him the old footsie roll?
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Oh, was that his cousin who did that?
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No.
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I thought it was his sister or something.
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I thought it was his cousin who gave him the footjob.
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Can we say that on this part?
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Oh, this part you can say.
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Yeah, gave him the old fucking footsie up there.
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Tossed around his bales.
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I need a yellow and I need a fucking foot job.
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So do you guys, should I pull up the pictures of Hunter Biden's dong?
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You can look at it.
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I mean, do we also get this?
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Are there ladies in it or is it just Hunter?
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Yeah.
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Is that his cousin?
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Cause that definitely does look incestual if I'm being honest.
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A hundred percent.
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And he also has a very night at the Roxbury Chain.
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So this is the thing I was pointing out.
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Do you see Hunter Biden's dick?
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Because you can.
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He's rather not.
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I can see it from here.
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That's right.
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That's right.
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Take a good look.
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He's naked in a pool.
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The first picture is infinitely more upsetting than him jerking off.
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The first picture literally just looks like he regretfully buried a body of like a hit and run.
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It looks like he just got back from a Ted Kennedy drive.
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He's like, I don't know what happened to Susan.
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Did you have a towel?
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Did the Daily Caller think that... He's quick, find me a pool to jerk off in.
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That's the second bit.
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It goes in order.
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Hey, you can see that he's grabbing his junk.
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Yes.
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Hold on.
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These pictures to me now, it's a flip book.
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It's in order.
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Buried a body, then panicked, went to masturbate in the pool, then smoking after he came.
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Yeah, if it's innocent, it's just dipped his head in, decided to take a dip, tried cigarettes for the first time.
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I appreciate that.
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I like how they circled his head.
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Yeah, they really did highlight.
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They highlighted the wrong head.
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Oh, can you believe that?
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Yeah, yeah, they really did highlight they highlighted the wrong head. Oh, can you believe that?
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Look this guy has a face Look at that frown he's got.
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Hunter Biden hacked Snopes.
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What are we talking about Snopes?
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What do we got?
► 00:07:39
4chan explodes after it allegedly hacked Hunter Biden.
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So I had to look at a bunch of these hacked things that they were posting and a lot of it is like Hunter banging women and shit.
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Yeah.
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Like the one of him sending a text message to his dad is basically like a woman bent over and he's just from behind.
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Oh, okay.
► 00:07:56
I was actually trying to figure out what you were talking about during the show.
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It's a virtual Christmas card.
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Yeah, basically.
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It's animated.
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He did spell out Happy Holidays on her back.
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Let me see if I can pull up something from Patriots.win.
► 00:08:18
So this is, we have the, formerly the Donald, it's Patriots.win.
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Patriot.win.
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And I'm wondering if they have the, what is this?
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Hey, if you made me look at him masturbating by himself in a pool, can I at least see him fucking a girl?
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Yeah, but I'm wondering where you can get him, because... Oh, got it.
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There was one I saw earlier, I think it is old, though, where he's just twirling around a gun.
► 00:08:42
Right.
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And he's just naked next to his bed.
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Jesus.
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I don't know if he's doing meth or... Oh, Jesus has nothing to do with it.
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I don't know if it's meth or cocaine or crack.
► 00:08:54
No, it's not cocaine.
► 00:08:56
Like, one of the things, they called him Peto Peter on the phone, because apparently Biden called himself Peter Henderson or something.
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Okay.
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Who was like a character- Oh, that was like his pseudonym or something?
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Yeah, like a Tom Clancy character who betrays his country and sells it.
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Wow.
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Of all Tom Clancy- Are you kidding?
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No, no, that's- Just call yourself Jack Ryan, bro.
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Call yourself the hero.
► 00:09:13
This is hilarious.
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Look at this picture.
► 00:09:15
His daughter on the lips, his daughter on the lips, his daughter on the lips, his wife on the cheek.
► 00:09:20
Gross!
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Thank you to our good friends over at Patriots.
► 00:09:24
Wow.
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I don't know if the... It's so weird with the kid.
► 00:09:29
That's just weird.
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Kissing his granddad on the lips.
► 00:09:31
Yeah, I've never been kissed on the lips.
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By a parent?
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Hell no.
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Grandparents?
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No.
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Disgusting.
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I've been jerked off to completion.
► 00:09:38
That's a little different.
► 00:09:40
After-hour show, baby!
► 00:09:43
Yeah, but still!
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I get kicked off.
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There's one rule in what we do and it's no kissing on the mouth.
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That's right.
► 00:09:54
Everything else.
► 00:09:59
We're not gross.
► 00:10:00
Well, let's see.
► 00:10:02
It's pretty woman rules.
► 00:10:04
Hey, it's Kimberly Fletcher here from Moms4America with some very exciting news.
► 00:10:10
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► 00:11:07
Visit momsforamerica.us today for more information and to secure your exclusive VIP meet and greet tickets.
► 00:11:15
See you on the tour!
► 00:11:17
We'll see if I can find some photos, but we do have this tweet from Cernovich.
► 00:11:24
This is a good point.
► 00:11:25
He says, It was treated as a huge story when some reporters found out that Don Jr.
► 00:11:29
and Eric posted in a hunting forum.
► 00:11:31
It was a major scoop.
► 00:11:31
They didn't even post anything dodgy, but finding this forum, huge story.
► 00:11:36
Today, we've got Hunter Biden.
► 00:11:38
So wait, what was the hunting thing?
► 00:11:39
Just them hunting?
► 00:11:40
They posted in the forum.
► 00:11:41
They were just like old photos of them doing like culling or something.
► 00:11:44
Yeah.
► 00:11:45
Yeah.
► 00:11:48
Hunting is, it was actually just hunting, right, though?
► 00:11:50
Yeah, like hunting animals.
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Yeah, that's what I thought.
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Not like hunting prostitutes and dragging them across state lines.
► 00:11:56
No, or like even hunting rhinos or whatever, or tigers, like a dentist on a bait pile.
► 00:12:02
It wasn't anything bad, it was just, some people hunt.
► 00:12:05
Yeah, just deer hunting.
► 00:12:08
I got this thing where I'm looking at texts, apparently Hunter Biden referred to Jill Biden as a vindictive fucking, what does he say, vindictive cunt?
► 00:12:18
Yeah, like apparently she beat him or something.
► 00:12:20
And there's like a text message where he talks about how she abused him or some shit.
► 00:12:24
And I'm like staring at it like, is this just like drama, like real, what do they call it, like reality TV drama trash that's taking my eyes off the fucking Federal Reserve?
► 00:12:35
Probably.
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But I mean, at the same point, it's the president's son.
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You can't fucking ignore it.
► 00:12:39
I mean, you can't really ignore it.
► 00:12:41
You can acknowledge it.
► 00:12:42
Look, whether or not it upsets you is up to you.
► 00:12:43
It's the president's son who does business with the president and handles his private affairs.
► 00:12:47
Yes, it's the president's business partner.
► 00:12:49
Yes, exactly.
► 00:12:51
Well, I also feel that there's probably a lot of validity to it because if you look at his age, I mean, he's how old now?
► 00:12:59
52.
► 00:12:59
52, came up in a certain age.
► 00:13:00
I guarantee you they were abusive whether or not, you know, whatever degree they were.
► 00:13:06
There was emotional abandonment.
► 00:13:08
I assure you there was abuse.
► 00:13:09
There's no doubt about it.
► 00:13:10
I'm sure she was a certain way.
► 00:13:12
If you see him when he's, you know, all together, He's very, uh, dominating.
► 00:13:17
He's very, he's almost cruel really when you see him when he's talking to like Clarence Thomas and stuff like it's very, just dropping the N word.
► 00:13:25
You know, it's really, it's pretty amazing how Joe Biden did carry himself at one time.
► 00:13:29
I bet Joe Biden beat Hunter.
► 00:13:31
Oh, for sure.
► 00:13:32
No, I mean, like, he really, I think, beat him quite badly, and I'm sure she was very emotional and very physically abusive.
► 00:13:39
I mean, I'm sure they both had extremely... Poor Hunter.
► 00:13:43
Not poor Hunter, but... I'm just imagining this little boy, Hunter Biden, and he walks in the kitchen and he's got, like, a potato sack on for clothing, and he's like...
► 00:13:53
Please, I'm hungry.
► 00:13:54
And he goes, what?
► 00:13:55
Come on, man.
► 00:13:56
He rips the belt off, just starts whacking, just mercilessly beating him.
► 00:14:00
And Jill's going, yeah, fucking get him.
► 00:14:02
Get him, Jill.
► 00:14:03
Fucking make him bleed.
► 00:14:04
She grabs a big spoon.
► 00:14:05
She's like, time for dessert, Hunter.
► 00:14:08
And then Hunter's like, one day I'll find crack.
► 00:14:10
One day.
► 00:14:11
No, no, anyway, he falls on the ground, there's parmesan cheese, and he crawls over to it, and he licks it, and then, because he was hungry, right?
► 00:14:19
So then, it's a sad, tragic story.
► 00:14:21
One day, he's 18, he's in college, and he sees on the carpet what he thinks is parmesan cheese.
► 00:14:26
So for some reason, he smokes it, it was crack!
► 00:14:30
And he's wearing the same potato sack.
► 00:14:40
He smoked what he thought was Parmesan cheese because it was like a thing he formed and then he was like, what's happening?
► 00:14:44
I feel so good.
► 00:14:45
And they're like, yeah, that wasn't Parmesan.
► 00:14:47
That was crack.
► 00:14:47
And he was like, wow, I'm telling you this girl goes for $5.
► 00:14:51
I give you a kiss.
► 00:14:53
It was actually... Can you get me a yellow friend to do it?
► 00:14:56
It was actually a sad story.
► 00:14:58
He was ordering street parmesan for spaghetti and it was sliced with crack.
► 00:15:01
Can you believe it?
► 00:15:02
That's how he got hooked on it.
► 00:15:03
Hunter Biden's gonna be the true hero.
► 00:15:05
He's gonna blow up Joe and all this stuff and he's gonna be the hero in the story.
► 00:15:08
He was abused and everyone riddled him.
► 00:15:11
They're gonna make a statue of Hunter of like the man who stopped Joe Biden.
► 00:15:16
But the statue of him is like him smoking crack naked.
► 00:15:19
Except from from here, Don's an ice cube.
► 00:15:26
Joe will leave office with a circle around his head.
► 00:15:28
Hunter will go on the redemption tour.
► 00:15:30
There'll be all this love for Hunter, he was abused by his father, and then he's gonna accidentally smoke crack again, and then it'll just disappear from the media.
► 00:15:37
I like the idea that you said he's weakened at Berniezing, the sobriety.
► 00:15:41
Yes.
► 00:15:42
Like they fixed his teeth.
► 00:15:43
Yeah.
► 00:15:44
He smokes crack, and then they're like, all right, are you with it?
► 00:15:47
Okay, come do the speech and claim to be sober.
► 00:15:49
And then as soon as he gets in the car, he's like, oof.
► 00:15:52
Yeah, yeah some crack again He's on he was on the today show and they even had pictures of him like getting his teeth fixed almost like three days I just said then he's down there, and he's just like yeah You know I used to smoke a lot of you smoke a lot of Parmesan cheese.
► 00:16:06
He's having withdrawal right now Yeah, yeah, are you getting choked up about your dad?
► 00:16:14
Hey?
► 00:16:14
Why?
► 00:16:16
Why did your rider only say no green M&Ms and crack?
► 00:16:20
Have you guys ever been around someone who just did a bunch of blow?
► 00:16:22
I was around Dave in the 90s.
► 00:16:30
Joe Biden comes on the Today Show and he's sitting there going like this and he's like looking around and he's like, dude, dude, I gotta tell you the story.
► 00:16:34
It's like to my dad, right?
► 00:16:35
He's like going to China because Because, like, dude, China's really, really bad.
► 00:16:38
But you gotta understand, like, it's not about China, dude.
► 00:16:40
It's also about Ukraine.
► 00:16:41
Like, Ukraine, there's gas.
► 00:16:42
People are getting so mad about this.
► 00:16:43
But, bro, like, the oil prices are so high.
► 00:16:45
Like, I'm telling you.
► 00:16:46
They're just, like, putting Xanax into a drink, and they're like,
► 00:16:51
here you go.
► 00:16:52
Yeah, here you go, bud.
► 00:16:53
That's him before the show, and then he drinks it, and he goes,
► 00:16:56
my dad helped me become a better man.
► 00:16:58
So it's like the Xanax combined with the Coke normalizes.
► 00:17:02
A doctor comes in, like he's Elvis, and they're like, all that matters is he looks normal on that show today.
► 00:17:06
This is Sopwatch, and they're like, you've got 12 minutes.
► 00:17:09
Go!
► 00:17:13
He's just even enough to sit in a chair.
► 00:17:18
So fucked up.
► 00:17:19
I got the impulse that he's gonna kill himself, Hunter is.
► 00:17:23
You know what's crazy?
► 00:17:23
I actually, I thought about that and I didn't say it out loud, but I thought about that when we started this.
► 00:17:29
Maybe that's how Biden drops out.
► 00:17:31
Donald Trump is apparently going to announce the run for the presidency in fall this year.
► 00:17:35
Here's a list of guys, then Joel will play the sympathy, do the sympathy thing.
► 00:17:39
That's the only way out.
► 00:17:40
It's so sad.
► 00:17:41
I don't want Hunter to kill himself, man.
► 00:17:42
No, I don't either.
► 00:17:43
Listen, listen.
► 00:17:44
Donald Trump is apparently going to announce the run for the presidency in fall this year.
► 00:17:48
Soon, yeah.
► 00:17:49
He showed the plane and everything, and he's even contemplating, there's reports that he's
► 00:17:53
going to announce early.
► 00:17:54
If he does, Biden is fucked.
► 00:17:57
What can Joe Biden do?
► 00:17:58
We know the Democrats don't want him to run.
► 00:17:59
He can't win.
► 00:18:00
So he'll need to bow out.
► 00:18:02
Why would he bow out?
► 00:18:03
If he bows out early, Trump goes, Joe Biden ran away.
► 00:18:06
The Democrats can't handle it.
► 00:18:07
I've won.
► 00:18:08
My son needs help.
► 00:18:09
Or Joe Biden is old and he gets sick or something happens.
► 00:18:13
Donald Trump says he can't handle it.
► 00:18:14
You can't vote for him.
► 00:18:15
He's sick.
► 00:18:16
But there is one way out for him that doesn't hurt the Democrats.
► 00:18:19
Hunter becomes sick or dies.
► 00:18:21
And Joe says, my only children, this is not the life for me.
► 00:18:26
Thank you, America.
► 00:18:27
I'm sorry.
► 00:18:28
I did my best.
► 00:18:29
I'm riding the Amtrak into the sunset.
► 00:18:31
That's right.
► 00:18:31
And then the Democrats don't lose.
► 00:18:33
The Democrats go, you know, we had a great president in Joe Biden, despite all his hardships.
► 00:18:38
And he bowed out because of family.
► 00:18:39
And we respect that.
► 00:18:40
Donald Trump should not be bringing this up.
► 00:18:42
That's the only way they have out.
► 00:18:43
Yeah.
► 00:18:45
If any of his advisors hear this show right now, they're gonna be like, we have to kill Hunter.
► 00:18:49
No, I think they're just thinking everyone in this room.
► 00:18:53
Or severe illness. Like, he might not die, but like if he has like an OD and he's like in the
► 00:18:59
hospital, he's comatose or something, they might just be like...
► 00:19:02
Or really needs that rehab to the point where you're gonna see some change in him that actually
► 00:19:07
works.
► 00:19:08
Because I mean, there is... To get sober, you have to want to be sober, and that's a guy who doesn't want to be sober.
► 00:19:13
He's fighting, and they're like, no, no!
► 00:19:16
And they're dragging him off, and they're like, it's for his own good, he's losing it.
► 00:19:19
He's just on intervention, just drinking Listerine.
► 00:19:22
They're trying to get him to go to Betty Ford.
► 00:19:24
Hey, is Hunter Biden my mom?
► 00:19:27
I've got the super vanilla extract and Listerine, baby.
► 00:19:30
I have like, the one part of my brain is sympathy and love for this man, and I want his best future, but the other part of me is like, he's a corrupt businessman that's been fucking selling our country out.
► 00:19:39
I want harsh justice.
► 00:19:41
So I don't know.
► 00:19:42
Part of that, too, for me, though, is like, what else do you do?
► 00:19:46
Like, what else is he supposed to do?
► 00:19:47
And again, I guess you could morally make a different choice.
► 00:19:51
But at the same time, can you?
► 00:19:52
I mean, I guess I don't know.
► 00:19:53
I've never walked in those shoes to be him.
► 00:19:56
Like, I do have empathy for Hunter.
► 00:19:58
I have none for Joe.
► 00:20:00
So I think Joe is a sociopath.
► 00:20:03
I think he's a narcissist.
► 00:20:04
I don't think he has a soul.
► 00:20:05
I don't think he cares about his kids.
► 00:20:07
I really don't.
► 00:20:08
I really think he's an evil, evil son of a bitch.
► 00:20:11
I believe that.
► 00:20:11
I remember there was, I've seen two comics.
► 00:20:16
One, I don't know if he's like outed, but like heavy into drugs, very, very famous,
► 00:20:21
heavy into like hard drugs like this.
► 00:20:24
And I did a, there was like a TV showcase in Australia and he was on it and he actually seemed really nice,
► 00:20:32
but all of his fucking agents and these yes men around him, literally applauding in circles when he would make jokes,
► 00:20:38
treating him like a special royal child.
► 00:20:42
And then I remember I did, I had this weird dinner and Andy Dick was there and Andy Dick was sober
► 00:20:49
and he was being super fucking cool.
► 00:20:51
And I had to go to a set and he goes, hey, let me come to your set.
► 00:20:55
And again, super fucking cool.
► 00:20:57
And we were talking about, Depression and we were talking about recovery and I told
► 00:21:01
him that you know Robin really helped me with my depression And he was telling me that Chris Farley gave him his the
► 00:21:06
big book. He's like book of a yeah And he was like, you know really trying to stay sober
► 00:21:11
Hey guys, Josh hammer here the host of America on trial with Josh hammer a podcast for the first podcast network
► 00:21:18
Look, there are a lot of shows out there that are explaining the political news cycle, what's happening on the Hill, the this, the that.
► 00:21:25
There are no other shows that are cutting straight to the point when it comes to the unprecedented lawfare debilitating and affecting the 2024 presidential election.
► 00:21:34
We do all of that every single day right here on America on Trial with Josh Hammer.
► 00:21:38
Subscribe and download your episodes wherever you get your podcasts.
► 00:21:40
This is America on Trial with Josh Hammer.
► 00:21:54
So the reason I bring this up is because you take someone like Hunter Biden, we're just talking about comics, right?
► 00:22:00
You take someone as powerful as Hunter Biden, even if homeboy wanted to get sober, when you are just surrounded by sycophants and yes men and people who are, you know, using you to either get to your dad or whatever, it's, I mean, borderline impossible, uh, to, to get help.
► 00:22:17
Even if you want help now, I'm not saying he's a good person and he wants help or whatever, but like, Man, it's one thing, you know, you wanted to get sober.
► 00:22:26
You probably had some good fucking people in your life who wanted to help you.
► 00:22:29
Whereas I feel like when you're that powerful, if you don't want to get sober, everyone's just going to enable you, give you everything you want and not question you at all.
► 00:22:37
You have a $30,000 a month house in Malibu that's being funded by the taxpayers that you're allowed to do drugs in.
► 00:22:43
I mean, it's a big difference.
► 00:22:44
Yes.
► 00:22:45
And yeah, Andy Dick, there's always that funny story with Norm MacDonald where Chris Farley went into a bathroom with Andy Dick and, uh, I guess Norm Macdonald looks at Ari Lane and goes, well, there's only two reasons you go into a bathroom with Andy Dick and neither one of them are good.
► 00:22:58
Norm is the best.
► 00:22:59
He's the best.
► 00:23:00
I'm going to be a little bit more.
► 00:23:11
He does.
► 00:23:12
$30 million?
► 00:23:13
$30,000 a month?
► 00:23:13
Oh, $30,000 a month.
► 00:23:14
A month, yeah.
► 00:23:15
On taxpayers, where he's allowed, guarded by security, or by, what do you call them?
► 00:23:22
Secret Service.
► 00:23:23
Secret Service, thank you.
► 00:23:24
Someone posted the joke from Dirty Work, where Norm is like, look at all these dead hookers!
► 00:23:29
And the guy's trying to close the trunks.
► 00:23:31
And it's all Hunter.
► 00:23:33
Right, yeah, exactly.
► 00:23:34
They're like the Hunter Biden scandal and Norm's like, you know, they're all popping open.
► 00:23:38
And the guy's Twitter.
► 00:23:39
He's trying to shut it all in.
► 00:23:43
I've never seen so many dead hookers in all my life.
► 00:23:46
Lord knows I have.
► 00:23:47
That movie was great.
► 00:23:49
That is the funniest movie, dude.
► 00:23:51
And the original script is amazing.
► 00:23:53
The best bar fight of all time.
► 00:23:55
Where he's like, G7, Rolling Stones, Street Fighters, and you press G8.
► 00:24:01
Wham!
► 00:24:01
Chair shot.
► 00:24:02
An entire bar fight to that.
► 00:24:04
Saget did that yeah yeah yep the fish scene I was one of Farley's greatest
► 00:24:11
roles because he's basically the unlikable one yes and he's just he's
► 00:24:15
just yeah that's a guy's new mayor Lee Ming the Saigon whore that I know I
► 00:24:24
haven't seen it it's fantastic I'll watch it with you in I know such a sad
► 00:24:32
sad year for that too and Norm held cancer was it 11 years I think you
► 00:24:39
fought it never told anybody and people were yeah I mean I This last special was beautiful.
► 00:24:46
It was awesome.
► 00:24:46
I mean, just him at home, into his computer.
► 00:24:49
Hilarious.
► 00:24:51
You know, I didn't want to... I'm stuttering because I'm like, I don't want to sound like name-droppy, but I also think it's like cool to say.
► 00:24:58
And if you had any experiences with Norm, anyone who did can follow it.
► 00:25:03
We have pages of direct messages on Twitter.
► 00:25:07
Pages.
► 00:25:08
All about comedy, censorship, cancel culture.
► 00:25:11
And the reason I'm saying that is because he cared.
► 00:25:15
I've never seen anyone like, I mean, dude, he would just write these like monologues about how much he cared about comedy, about free speech.
► 00:25:23
Like it was so authentic and so legitimate.
► 00:25:28
Like he loved nothing more than comedy and like the purest fucking way.
► 00:25:34
I thought about if you released those, like the McDonald Chronicles or something, and he'd be like, I don't know, fuck.
► 00:25:40
But his people might not.
► 00:25:41
I mean, he wouldn't, but I would just feel weird doing it, but it's cool to have.
► 00:25:45
I've shown a couple of my friends and shit like that just because it's dope.
► 00:25:49
He was fucking smart, man.
► 00:25:50
Yeah, we should set up a private space where only rich and famous people get to watch that stuff and really experience it.
► 00:25:55
The poor people don't get to watch any of that stuff.
► 00:25:57
We'll invite Hunter!
► 00:25:58
It's in one of those New York apartments that won't be affected by a nuclear bomb.
► 00:26:03
No, it'll be in a $30,000 a month mansion with blowin' hookers.
► 00:26:07
Yeah, it'll be great.
► 00:26:08
They're called yellows, Tim.
► 00:26:10
We like walk in and Hunter's like, man, you're making bank off those videos about me, Tim.
► 00:26:14
And I'll be like, haha, we cheers.
► 00:26:16
We got him.
► 00:26:17
We got him, yeah.
► 00:26:17
We got him, baby.
► 00:26:18
It'll be like the Playboy Mansion, watching a porn star blowin' a dog.
► 00:26:24
No, that's real.
► 00:26:26
Have you been to the Playboy Mansion?
► 00:26:29
No, no, but those are old stories.
► 00:26:31
I wanted to.
► 00:26:32
My friend got to go once.
► 00:26:33
That's still a thing?
► 00:26:34
Gross.
► 00:26:35
No, no, he's dead.
► 00:26:36
In fact, the company kind of went under, but the deal was if you bought the house, you had to let him live in it still.
► 00:26:41
What?
► 00:26:43
That weird?
► 00:26:43
Yeah, so if you bought the Playboy Mansion, you just had this perverted voyeur living upstairs.
► 00:26:49
You can fuck his wife, but he's hanging up above you watching.
► 00:26:53
We gotta bring that back.
► 00:26:56
Jamie, can you be our lascivious old man?
► 00:26:59
man. Oh yeah. Oh perfect. 100%. This is my man. According to Jezebel.com I already am.
► 00:27:07
We'll hire a bunch of young beautiful women in a talent role for a show and they have
► 00:27:12
to be you know, you know, hanging out on you.
► 00:27:16
Yeah, you don't have to ask me twice, buddy.
► 00:27:17
Well, I used to do, it was the Artie Lang and Anthony show, and I got there, and Artie was saying when he first did it, or went to the Playboy Mansion, it was for, you know, stand-up comedy.
► 00:27:27
And it's like all these beautiful bunnies, and then the grotto, and the famous things.
► 00:27:32
That whole party ends, the real women come, and it's just these, like, toothless, cocky whores.
► 00:27:38
Oh, no!
► 00:27:39
And Artie's not exactly, you know, filled with standards.
► 00:27:42
And even he's just like, oh, what is this?
► 00:27:44
I'm not touching any of this.
► 00:27:45
Where are the pretty girls going?
► 00:27:47
They're all being, like, shown off.
► 00:27:48
That's just for show.
► 00:27:53
That woman looks like Hugh Hefner.
► 00:27:56
We're in West Virginia, and there's a gentleman's club.
► 00:27:59
There's a bunch of them in this one area.
► 00:28:01
And we drove past it because we were going to buy fireworks and then go let them off.
► 00:28:05
And we saw the sign.
► 00:28:06
It said, come visit our daytime dancers for a gentleman's club.
► 00:28:11
I have to go.
► 00:28:12
And it's like two things.
► 00:28:13
I have to go to this.
► 00:28:14
Two things.
► 00:28:15
For a bit.
► 00:28:16
Everybody knows daytime strippers are the bad ones.
► 00:28:20
Bark in the basement.
► 00:28:21
And when you have to advertise to try and get people to come in, they must be especially bad.
► 00:28:25
Oh, right.
► 00:28:25
I didn't even think about that.
► 00:28:27
They, like, throw in the buffet for free.
► 00:28:29
That's the worst part, too.
► 00:28:31
You're like, oh, well, the buffet is free.
► 00:28:32
You want to be sitting there like, these eggs are delightful.
► 00:28:37
Dude, this is like this fat old woman and she's like thrusting in front of you and you're like, it's worth the bang.
► 00:28:43
Dude, I feel like I would get syphilis from the eggs.
► 00:28:46
Can you believe it's turkey sausage?
► 00:28:47
It really doesn't taste like it.
► 00:28:50
I remember when I was growing up.
► 00:28:50
Crab Benedict?
► 00:28:51
You know what, this is pretty funny.
► 00:28:55
People used to say all the time, this is what I couldn't stand, is people would go, Hooters actually has really good food.
► 00:29:01
I like to go there because the food's really good.
► 00:29:02
And I believed it the first time.
► 00:29:04
I was like 18, and I was like, really?
► 00:29:06
And they're like, oh yeah, dude, the wings are great.
► 00:29:08
And I was like, oh, okay, I'll go.
► 00:29:09
And then I go and the food was shit.
► 00:29:11
But then we had big tits.
► 00:29:13
And so I'm like, you lied to me.
► 00:29:14
So it goes.
► 00:29:15
You're like, this is what it is, yeah.
► 00:29:16
Yeah, you could have just said you wanted to look at girls' tits.
► 00:29:18
Yeah.
► 00:29:19
Whatever, dude.
► 00:29:19
You want to get bad food and look at nice tits.
► 00:29:21
Correct.
► 00:29:22
Yeah, she looks fine.
► 00:29:23
I don't know.
► 00:29:23
Maybe it was the Hooters.
► 00:29:24
I went to the foods.
► 00:29:25
It was shit.
► 00:29:26
It's one of those things that you would hear from someone that probably heard it from someone that the food was great.
► 00:29:29
And it's an excuse.
► 00:29:31
Because someone was embarrassed.
► 00:29:32
They wanted to go stare at tits.
► 00:29:33
Read the articles on Playboy.
► 00:29:35
That's what it is.
► 00:29:36
We had a Hooters in the hotel we were staying at to do comedy.
► 00:29:39
This is like 15 years ago.
► 00:29:40
Just killing it at life.
► 00:29:42
And we went downstairs to eat at Hooters, because why not?
► 00:29:46
You have to.
► 00:29:46
And we're sitting there, and there was this girl celebrating her birthday party with her dad, which was the saddest thing I've ever seen, with balloons, just her and her dad.
► 00:29:57
And that's cool, you got to see Joe Biden before he became president.
► 00:29:59
I know, right?
► 00:30:01
And there's this guy at another table, and he just looks over and he goes, how old's your daughter?
► 00:30:06
He goes, 13.
► 00:30:06
Natalie he goes 13 and he goes nice we were we were crying We were like, this is, we were like, that's a commercial for Hooters!
► 00:30:24
That's Hooters!
► 00:30:26
And every, it still is an inside joke where anytime we've even, to this day, even send each other a text, we immediately just go, nice.
► 00:30:36
Jamie is deceased.
► 00:30:37
It was the creepiest thing I've ever heard.
► 00:30:39
Holy shit!
► 00:30:40
Hooters!
► 00:30:41
We should just make it.
► 00:30:43
Hooters.
► 00:30:45
Oh fuck.
► 00:30:47
We uh, we gotta do uh, we have an idea of doing fake commercials for Castcastle.
► 00:30:51
Yeah.
► 00:30:51
Okay.
► 00:30:52
So we gotta do shit like this.
► 00:30:53
A hundred percent.
► 00:30:55
A hundred percent.
► 00:30:56
We should do it.
► 00:30:58
How old's your daughter?
► 00:31:00
Nice!
► 00:31:02
Hooters!
► 00:31:03
Watch the big game on Sunday!
► 00:31:06
Bring your kids!
► 00:31:08
Just her sitting on her dad's lap sadly with a balloon.
► 00:31:11
Bring your daughter, who clearly her mom died.
► 00:31:16
That's terrible.
► 00:31:17
It was so sad.
► 00:31:19
I'm definitely going to hell.
► 00:31:21
Bring your daughter for the one weekend you're allowed to see her.
► 00:31:26
For good reason.
► 00:31:28
Your first unsupervised weekend.
► 00:31:31
We're going to get a bunch of emails.
► 00:31:33
We're going to get a bunch of membership cancellations.
► 00:31:35
I brought my daughter to Hooters for everything.
► 00:31:38
Maybe you shouldn't have done that.
► 00:31:41
What the fuck?
► 00:31:43
There's nothing wrong with that.
► 00:31:44
I go for the wings.
► 00:31:47
That's right.
► 00:31:48
When people were talking about the drag queen story, people, like the leftists, were like, well, look at these little boys at Hooters.
► 00:31:53
And all the conservatives were like, that is also bad.
► 00:31:56
It's also bad.
► 00:31:56
But they were like, do you think it's conservative Christians bringing their children to Hooters?
► 00:32:00
No, it's like liberal urban city dudes doing it.
► 00:32:03
You're complaining about yourself.
► 00:32:04
Right.
► 00:32:04
I got an idea.
► 00:32:06
John Levine from the New York Post wrote, um, can conservatives actually articulate, like, what's wrong with Drag Queen Story Hour?
► 00:32:13
All they say is, it's just bad.
► 00:32:15
And I was like, wow.
► 00:32:16
And I was like, okay.
► 00:32:18
I was like, clearly you've not seen any of our shows talking about it.
► 00:32:20
And, but I just quote tweeted him a quote, and I put, um, Go Go Dancer Story Hour okayed by John Levine.
► 00:32:27
Because what people don't understand is, um, Drag is inherently sexual.
► 00:32:32
Drag performers all know it.
► 00:32:33
But they're doing a non-sexualized performance for kids.
► 00:32:37
But it's like having a go-go dancer read a book to a kid.
► 00:32:40
So that's the gag.
► 00:32:41
I'm like, okay, what do you think would happen if we made a flyer for, like, go-go dancer story hour for your children?
► 00:32:46
Bring your five-year-olds.
► 00:32:48
And it's like a picture of this big, bimbo-y, busty, big-tittied woman and she's, like, smiling and holding a book.
► 00:32:53
And she, like, thrusts while, like, reading.
► 00:32:56
Like, parents would be like, I don't want that.
► 00:32:58
Like, then why would you want the drag queen to do the same thing?
► 00:33:00
Because they were doing that.
► 00:33:02
Right.
► 00:33:02
No, it's true.
► 00:33:02
And it's also, your kid thinks it's a clown.
► 00:33:06
Like, whatever you're doing, like, it's not working.
► 00:33:08
Because your kid's just showing up and being like, there's this painted thing.
► 00:33:11
And I think it's a clown.
► 00:33:13
I really do think that's what kids think.
► 00:33:15
That'd be so terrifying.
► 00:33:16
A clown with a naked ass?
► 00:33:17
Yeah.
► 00:33:19
You're like, I remember there was a very sexual clown at my birthday party.
► 00:33:24
Imagine Bozo's magnum condoms making animals.
► 00:33:29
Just these greasy elephants.
► 00:33:31
I'm imagining this little kid sitting on his mom's lap with his birthday cake, and she's like, blow out your candles, and there's a clown next to him thrusting, like, towards the cake, with him, like, right here, just like... The clown's like, how old's he?
► 00:33:43
Nice!
► 00:33:45
The clown's name is Candles?
► 00:33:51
That child?
► 00:33:52
That child's name?
► 00:33:53
Hunter Byte.
► 00:33:53
Hunter Byte, hell yeah.
► 00:33:54
All right, man.
► 00:33:56
Dave, thanks for hanging out.
► 00:33:57
This has been hilarious.
► 00:33:58
It's been a blast.
► 00:33:59
Oh, dude, thanks for having me.
► 00:34:00
It's been wanting to come for a long time.
► 00:34:01
Thank you for having me.
► 00:34:02
I appreciate it, too.
► 00:34:02
Yeah, man, any time, any time.
► 00:34:03
Thank you.
► 00:34:03
And for everybody who's a member, we got a ton of stuff we're planning.
► 00:34:06
We've been talking about it.
► 00:34:08
Big announcement potentially coming tomorrow.
► 00:34:10
Really appreciate all of your support.
► 00:34:11
Thanks for hanging out.