Do you struggle with weight?Why weight matters in a spouse.I gained 50 pounds with my ex she didn't say a damn thing. Luckily lost it all. I think she wanted me to be unattractive to other women.Why are people more cruel to family than strangers?YOU WILL BE JUDGED BY YOUR SPOUSE!Brains are more important than beauty once you get to middle age. Your hot but dumb gf won’t cut it when you grow up into a success and she doesn’t develop her mind to compensate for the looks going.My ex wife was pretty and clever when she was young (graduate, lawyer), but she stagnated intellectually because she didn’t need to use her brain much in life. Meanwhile I have had 30 years of professional life to hone my brain. The gap between us intellectually is too big nowadays for us to have much conversation.Excerpt from my novel 'The Future'Philosophy question for today or future date... Archetypal philosophers would be Plato and Socrates, but what about modern personalities like Karl Marx. He might be dead wrong on everything, but was he a (bad) philosopher, or do we need to carve out a space for him as a (bad) economist or (bad) theologian?I've done a lot of therapy, go to dance classes, ask women out at the coffee shop but am still finding it hard to find a girlfriend.I'm all for taking 150% responsibility for that, I do think I have more work to do therapy-wise, but I'm wondering if I'd find more dating success in another city?I live in a place with a lot of transplants and wonder if that means there's even more "I don't want to settle down until my 30s" women than usual for millennials.THE SIX STEPS OF TALKING TO ATTRACTIVE WOMENJuly 4 2023
What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming?
Whose broad stripes and bright stars through the perilous fight, O'er the ramparts we watched,
We're so gallantly streaming.
And the rocket's red glare, the bombs bursting in air, gave proof through the night that our flag was still there.
Oh, say does that star-spangled banner yet wave O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave?
It's a great song.
Hell to sing, and I'm not perfect at it, to put it mildly, but it's a great song.
Happy Independence Day!
Happy Independence Day.
What happened to my video?
There it is.
Alright.
Yes, it's quite a tune.
I'm free!
It's a note, it's a note and a half, let me tell you.
Let me tell you.
Yes, happy Independence Day.
Do you guys know, a little history here, I've got so much to talk to you guys about.
It's chilling.
So much to talk to you guys about.
It's chilling.
In an alternate universe, Stefan's tossing the opening pitch after belting that tune.
Yes, a little pitchy in both of them.
So, do you know what happened to the 56 signers of the Declaration of Independence?
It's pretty wild.
I was just reading that this morning, and I will let you know.
Because, you know, there's times where being, you know, a freedom fighter, so to speak, a reason fighter, is pretty rough, right?
It can be pretty rough.
It can be kind of unpleasant.
And let's see here.
56 signers.
All right.
Have you ever wondered what happened to the 56 men who signed the Declaration of Independence?
So five of the signers were captured by the British as traitors and tortured before they died.
But hey man, three years ago, I got deplatformed.
Twelve had their homes ransacked and burned.
Two lost their sons in the Revolutionary Army.
Another had two sons captured.
Nine of the fifty-six fought and died from wounds or hardships from the Revolutionary War.
So twenty-four of them were lawyers and jurists.
Eleven were merchants.
Nine were farmers and large plantation owners.
Men of means.
They were well-educated.
And they signed the Declaration of Independence knowing full well that the penalty would be death.
If they were captured.
Carton Braxton of Virginia, a wealthy planter and trader, saw his ships swept from the seas by the Royal Navy.
He sold his home and properties to pay his debts and died in rags.
Thomas McKeem was so hounded by the British that he was forced to move his family almost constantly.
He served in the Congress without pay and his family was kept in hiding.
His possessions were taken from him and poverty was his reward.
Vandals, or soldiers, or both, looted the properties of Ellery, Clymer, Hall, Walton, Gwinnett, Heywood, Rutledge, and Middleton.
At the Battle of Yorktown, Thomas Nelson, Jr.
noted that the British General Cornwallis had taken over the Nelson home from his headquarters.
The owner quietly urged General George Washington to open fire.
The home was destroyed, and Nelson died bankrupt.
You can't get insurance for acts of war, right?
Francis Lewis had his home and properties destroyed.
The enemy jailed his wife and she died within a few months.
John Hart was driven from his wife's bedside as she lay dying.
Their thirteen children fled for their lives.
His fields and his gristmill were laid to waste.
For more than a year he lived in forests and caves, returning home to find his wife dead and his children vanished.
A few weeks later, he died from exhaustion and a broken heart.
Norris and Livingston suffered similar fates.
Such were the stories and sacrifices of the American Revolution.
These were not wild-eyed, rabble-rousing ruffians.
They were soft-spoken men of means and education.
They had security, but they valued liberty more.
Standing tall, straight, and unwavering, they pledged for the support of this declaration.
With firm reliance on the protection of the divine providence, we mutually pledge to each other our lives, our fortunes, and our sacred honor.
What is asked of us is paltry compared to what was offered in the past.
All right.
Why do you keep... There we go.
I'm still running, right?
Yeah, it's just wild.
It's wild.
I didn't know all of that sort of stuff.
George Washington was bled to death by his doctors?
Usually that's just with medical bills, right?
All right.
So I just wanted to mention that.
Now, hit me with a why if you struggle with weight.
Hit me with a why if you struggle with weight.
Not waiting for my inevitable live streams, but struggle with weight.
So a few of you do, most of you don't.
No, but you're used to when you were a kid?
No.
So skinny light frame?
No.
Okay.
That's good.
Good for you.
Good.
Now be careful because just because you don't gain weight doesn't mean you aren't unhealthy, right?
Just be careful.
It's called skinny, skinny fat, right?
I never, I never think it's a terrible idea to get your blood work done.
So I just, uh, just check out on that.
Now, hit me with a why.
Have you ever, have you ever dated someone who gained weight?
I mean, not just a pound or two, but gained some weight?
No?
Again, this is to some degree youth and someone I would imagine, but it's a thing.
It's a thing.
So I'm going to tell you some thoughts about this, because probably what's going to happen is something like this, right?
So this is on one of these godforsaken websites that people talk about things they shouldn't.
Anyway, so this woman says, My fiancé, 24-year-old male, told me, 27-year-old female, he's not physically attracted to me anymore, and I don't know what to think.
So I'm 5'4", 165 pounds.
I have a bigger bust, but my weight is spread out rather pear-shaped.
My fiancé brought this to my attention and approached the topic respectfully, but now I feel absolutely disgusting.
He said I've gained weight and let myself go.
This is really hurtful.
I was about 135 pounds when we met four years ago.
We're getting married soon, really soon.
And I feel conflicted because I thought no matter what, he would love me and be attracted to me despite stress weight gain.
Uh, that's a- that's a tricky situation.
Moving through the doorway of the nation.
And somebody wrote in reply to something that was some posted, if I married you at 122 pounds and you ballooned up to 210 pounds in eight years of marriage, I will divorce you no matter how much your mind has grown along with it.
Right?
Saying, well, you know, you grow in life and so on.
It's like, so yeah, that's, uh, that's a, that's a lot.
88 pounds, right?
So if I married at 122, balloon up to 210, he says he would divorce you, right?
So, that's my question.
That's my question.
Would you, hit me with a why, if you would break up with a girl who put on 25% or more of her weight, body weight?
Cause I think it's a really interesting question.
It's becoming actually quite relevant.
So we kind of mixed here.
Uh, we got no, yes, no, yes, yes, yes, yes, absolutely.
Yes.
If I wanted children, right.
It's not healthy.
If I was a dude.
Yes.
Yes.
Depending on circumstances depends where, well, you know, it's just weight gain, right?
It's just all over the place, right?
It's not healthy.
Okay.
Yeah.
I was, I was just, I was wondering, I was, I was curious.
I was curious.
Everyone says yes, but I'm skeptical.
Why would you divorce a woman or break up with a woman?
Why would you divorce or break up with a woman if she gained 20, say 20, 25% or more weight?
And I'm not talking about pregnancy weight.
I like the genuine weight gain.
Why would you break up with her?
And I'm curious.
I know this is like, you've got to type and all of that, but I'm, I'm curious.
What do you guys think?
Why would you do it?
Pregnancy is not an excuse to gain weight permanently, right?
Oh, childbearing risk?
Depends on the reason and if she's willing to lose it.
Right.
It shows a lack of self-control and self-respect.
Somebody says 25% is gigantic.
It would probably be broken up well before that or talk her into slimming down again.
Probably not going to lose it either.
For the same reason she would break up with me if I suddenly decided to sit on my ass all day long without generating any income.
Also not the best example for the kids, because it's harder or impossible to lift her awful feeling of fat women sinking into bed for sex.
I'd see her as less feminine.
Well doesn't weight gain affect estrogen?
Yeah, 25% is gigantic, right?
Now, of course, in Europe it's not so bad, right?
But in America, it's brutal.
So, do you know what the average American woman weighs now?
The average American woman weighs over 170 pounds.
That is pretty wild.
That is just wild.
And I think, I think that women are now, do they wear more than men on average?
From 2016, I'm just looking here,
Today's American man weighs almost as much as 1.5 American women from the 1960s, alright?
So... I think it's a fairly... Do women weigh more than men?
Ah, they won't answer that.
Have you heard this data?
That women weigh more than men?
So more than 70% of US adults are considered overweight or obese.
And there's been, starting in the 1980s, hey under Fauci, there's been a steady increase in the percent of adults who are overweight or obese.
Of course, if you're overweight or obese, greater risk of developing high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, heart disease, stroke, liver disease, sleep apnea, certain types of cancer, including endometrial, liver, kidney, pancreatic and colon cancer, arthritis and joint pain, depression and anxiety, and so on.
So, yeah, it's pretty bad.
It's pretty bad.
So, let's see here.
I just want to get back to your comments.
Yeah, you might break up with her.
It would limit the physical activities we could do together.
Hiking, cycling, etc.
Looks don't bother me much.
Well, but there's a difference, right?
Looks, there's some looks you can control and some you can't, right?
I mean, you can't control your height, you can't control your eye color or your nose size or your face bones or whatever, right?
But you can control your weight, right?
You can control your weight.
But somebody says, we'd like to think if I committed to a woman, it wouldn't be the type of woman who didn't have this discipline and self-control, right?
Uh, let's see here.
When I was 18, I was in a relationship with a 5'3 woman who was over 200 pounds.
I was blind and horny.
My family hated her as she was of such low socioeconomic status and so far.
And so on.
Looking back, I start to dry heave when I think about our intimacy together.
Oof.
Oh, and so fat.
Yeah, yeah.
Somebody says, I gained 50 pounds with my ex.
She didn't say a goddamn thing.
Luckily lost it all.
I think she wanted me to be unattractive to other women.
Well, that's a not uncommon thing, right?
Like a woman will settle down with a guy and then just feed his ass to the size of Mars, right?
I've heard women weigh more than men when adjusted for their height.
Yeah.
Somebody says heaviest I ever got was 245.
I'm six foot three.
I've slimmed down to 208 since then.
Right.
Government and big media create stress-eating issues.
Oh yeah, I think you're telling people forever that the world is about to end.
So, I think it is legitimate, but preventable.
Okay, let me go this.
What percentage of, like you get married for the first time, what percentage
Failure do you have?
What percentage failure risk do you have if you get married for the first time?
People say 70% failure, 20% failure, 30% failure, 50, 50%, 50, 50.
Yeah, so the 50-50 is very common.
It's a complete lie.
And it's antinatalists and socialists who have put that status in.
So if you marry
A woman, for the first time, your marriage has a 70% chance of lasting.
Again, we can say how happy, how unhappy, but you're not unhappy enough to get divorced.
So your marriage has a 70%.
The reason it gets down to 50% is all of these jerks who just keep getting divorced and remarried and divorced, they drag down the average, right?
So first marriages, you've got a 70% chance of success.
Now, what if you have a marriage, you're getting married to an intelligent woman,
And you talk about values before you get married.
What is your chance of success in marriage if you marry an intelligent woman or an intelligent man and you talk about your values before you get married?
Yeah, you guys are bang on.
It's 95 to 98% success rate.
It's a 95 to 98% success rate.
Now, and I would assume that's pretty much close to 100% because, you know, maybe one person gets terminally ill or, you know, whatever, has some illness or some brain injury or some problem that changes their mood in some way or, you know, they go on psychotropics with the best of intentions and it messes up their personality.
So, if you marry an intelligent person and you talk about your values ahead of time, your chance of divorce is close to zero, in my view.
How do they measure talking about values, etc.
before marriage?
Well, did you have conversation about what you expected from marriage, what you want, what your standards were, whether you wanted to have children and so on, right?
So, and of course they can measure this because there are a lot of religious communities where you have to have premarital counseling to get married in the church.
Like you have to talk to the priest, the priest is going to lead you through all the questions and answers and so on, right?
More important than intelligence is regulated emotions.
Yes, but those two are related, right?
Those two are heavily related.
So I'm going to tell you why weight is so important in relationships and what it means.
If you're interested, hit me with a why, if you're interested in this topic.
Hit me with a why, if you're interested.
Cause I, you know, I want to serve you and, and, and know if it's important to you, right?
Cause it's really, really important.
All right.
So, let's go to the peaceful parenting paradigm.
So, when you have a monopoly, should your standards be higher or lower?
Right, they should be higher.
Which is why you are by far the most responsible for providing quality in your parenting as opposed to everything else.
Because your kids don't have a choice to be with you, right?
Your employer, your girlfriend, your friends, your family even, they have a total choice to spend time with you or not.
Your kids are trapped with you.
ABC, Accidental Biological Cage.
I'm not complaining about it, it's just simply a fact.
So because your children are trapped with you, you owe them the very highest standards, right?
Now everyone's noticed and it's something that, it's one of the things that kind of brought me into self-knowledge to begin with, was this complete mystery about why people who were vicious to me were nice to strangers.
Hit me with a why if you've ever noticed this.
Like somebody can be really, your parents can be like yelling at you in the car and then they're totally nice to the parking lot attendant.
Have you seen this?
Like it's completely mental, right?
Isn't it insane?
My mom would be like snarling at me, she'd kick me under the table and the waiter would come by and she'd go,
You know, like totally positive, screaming at me and then some idiot skinny hungry boy would call her and she'd be like, hi, you know, and just completely flip the switch, right?
Isn't that wild?
Super polite on the phone, right?
I remember reading a book called about it.
Gosh, it was a book about a dog.
Somebody's soul went into a dog or something.
It began with an F. I can't remember the name of the book.
And there was this like super cruel older woman.
And then she was really nice when people came over and all of that.
And butter wouldn't melt in her mouth, right?
And this is one of the things that just made no sense to me.
Like, why on earth would people be nicer to strangers than to the people they live with?
Now, here's the thing.
So the corollary of that, the corollary of being nicer to strangers than the people you live with, the corollary of that is
Working hard to be more physically attractive to strangers than your husband or your wife.
You get this, right?
Because we've all heard the stories of the woman, she divorces and then she goes to the gym, right?
Or women who are very concerned about their appearance, they go to the gym, they diet, they take care of their appearance, and then they get married and they stop doing that, right?
That's the exact same thing.
They're attractive to strangers,
And then when they get a monopoly, their service goes to shit.
When they get a monopoly, they become like the DMV, right?
Their service just falls off a cliff, falls into the toilet, right?
Now that's completely bizarre to me.
So when you get married, assuming that you are not a sicko, weirdo, pervert, and you go for monogamy, right?
So you get married.
You then have sexual monopoly with your spouse.
Now, because you have a monopoly, you have to provide being attractive.
I mean, you have to.
It's not an option.
It's not like, well, it'd be nice if.
Like, if you want to let yourself go, don't get married.
If you want to just sit around, eat bonbons, and spread like Fleischmann's butter on white bread, your butt all over the couch, then don't get married.
But once you get married, you have to stay attractive.
You have to.
It's not a choice.
It's not an option.
It's foundational to the relationship to stay.
Now, of course, time's going to whittle you away and you get jowly sags and all this kind of fun stuff, right?
So yeah, whatever, right?
But you do your best, right?
You do your best.
So you have a monopoly, and wherever you have a monopoly, you will have the tendency to get lazy, and that's where you have to put in your greatest value.
That's where you have to put in your greatest value.
And of course, men will say this as well.
They'll say about their wives, and maybe wives say this about their husbands, oh, you know, just sit around in sweatpants, you know, and don't do your hair and ever, but when people are coming over, it's like, gotta look good, gotta look great, whatever.
That's really insulting.
Oh, are we going out?
Well, I better dress up.
That's really insulting to your spouse, right?
So, gaining weight is generally unattractive.
And the reason why it's unattractive is it signals low equality, right?
It signals a lack of deferral of gratification.
It signals a lack of processing that you're aging, right?
So, I didn't particularly eat more.
I gained some weight in my early 30s just because my metabolism slowed and I didn't really notice it.
Like, I don't really weigh myself.
There's a grocery store not too far from me where there's scale and every couple of months I'll weigh myself but I don't really, I just judge it by my clothes and apparently I was gaining weight but I don't know where I was putting it but it certainly wasn't all muscle I'll tell you that.
So I gained some weight and then I'm like oh well I gotta lose the weight so I lost the weight and I'm down even further now.
It's really wild.
You must stay attractive.
If you gain weight, you are threatening your relationship, you're threatening your marriage, you're threatening the stability of your partnership.
And I don't understand how it's possible that, you know, a bonbon or a piece of chocolate is worth more than that.
And that's wild.
That's wild.
I don't
I don't understand it.
You have a monopoly.
You have to have a monopoly.
You have a monopoly and therefore you have to up your, you have to up your attractiveness.
In fact, I work harder to stay attractive to my wife than I ever would to stay attractive to strangers because what is staying attractive to strangers?
That doesn't, you know, it's nice, I guess, but it doesn't really mean that much, right?
It's because strangers can impose a cost on them.
Not really.
I mean, if you're mean to a waiter, what's the waiter gonna do?
Beat you up?
It's not that.
It's not that.
My mum was the lead role in Looking for Mr. Goodbar.
Oof.
Often fat people marry each other and both give up.
Could be.
Could be.
It's not often easy with caring for multiple small children without the knowledge of how to eat.
It can happen easily.
No, no, no.
Weight gain doesn't happen.
It doesn't just happen easily.
It doesn't just happen easily.
For women, physical maintenance is more important.
But for men, hold a job, build a business, invest wisely, provide, provide, provide, maintain confidence, and you'll be reciprocated with life's respect.
For both, good parenting.
Oh, you're like the self-pity guy.
Oh, men have it so much harder than women.
Women get it so easy, and we have all of these standards, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Oh my gosh.
Well, I tell you what, you know, you have that giant wall of acidic bitterness, and it will keep all optimistic and happy women away from you, and there'll be more left over for everyone else.
But the idea that you're gaining anything with this level of self-pity is just wild.
It's just wild.
All right.
Don't a lot of people just lack deferred gratification?
Again, what do you mean lack?
I don't know what that means by lack.
Like they're physically brain dead?
I mean massive amounts of people smoke and drink clearly knowing the consequences.
Well...
They're only generally harming themselves.
If you have kids, it's completely irresponsible, or even if you have a partner.
But smoking and drinking?
Okay, so I assume that people who smoke and drink enjoy smoking and drinking, and maybe they just would rather have pleasure now than later.
Let's see here.
Maybe the notion that once you're married, you're trapped, or rather your partner is.
Well, you've now said, I'm going to be the exclusive provider of love, romance, and sex.
I'm the exclusive provider of love and romance and sex.
And you don't have the right to withhold those things from your partner.
Because when you, when you promise
And it's tough, you know, because nobody should ever have sex when they don't want to, obviously, right?
That's horrible.
But if you have a barrier to sex, you've got to sort it and figure it out, right?
You've got to figure it out.
But when you say, forsaking all others, right?
In sickness and in health, for better or for worse, in richness and in poverty, forsaking all others, right?
So now you're the only person who provides physical affection, romance, love, and sexuality to your partner.
Anything which interferes with that is an enemy that must be vanquished.
Otherwise your marriage is going literally not tits up, but kind of tits up, right?
You once said the purpose of philosophy is the health of the body because we need the body to be healthy to do philosophy.
So an unhealthy body signals a lack of philosophy in their life.
Well, I think there's some level of credibility.
That needs to occur.
Oh, sorry.
Somebody says, Not self-pity, Steph.
It's obligation that men recognize the peculiarities of their role that only they can fulfill.
The job probably requires physical maintenance in many cases anyway.
But what's important, in my humble opinion, to the women seems the ability for husbands to long-term provide.
I don't know what that means.
Men provide more in some areas.
Women provide more in other areas.
I don't blame women for not having a penis.
I hope that women don't blame men for not having vaginas.
Yeah.
Once an outie, once in any, we have different roles to, to perform.
So here's another thing too.
You know, here's, it's a wild thing, right?
So, and I've, I've, I catapulted like in, in my world, I catapulted from, you know, broadcast grad student to, um, let's see here.
I don't know.
Are you interested?
Are you curious about a salary history?
Do you care?
Does it matter?
Again, I want to make sure I serve you.
Do you care what I was making?
Like how much my salary accelerated?
Yeah.
Okay, one person says no, everyone else says yes.
Okay, so this would be 25 years ago.
So I went from making, I got my first professional job as a COBOL programmer, I was making $40,000 and then I vaulted into the entrepreneurial world and I was making $60,000 and then six months later I was making a hundred and
$20,000 a year and then the last job I had I was over 160 plus a bunch of benefits and options and so on and that was the time that I decided to take a unbelievably huge pay cut to do a philosophy show, right?
So what I mean is that I went over the space of maybe a year, a year and four months from making nothing, like being broke, like completely broke, like really, like how am I going to pay my rent broke, to making $120,000 a year.
And I also had a car allowance of $700 a month, and of course all my travel was paid for, and I had a bunch of options and all of that.
Can someone do that calculation now, like 25 years ago?
What is $120,000?
And also, because I was a contractor, not an employee, I got to deduct a bunch of stuff too, so it was the equivalent of like, I don't know, $160,000, $170,000 a year.
So that's all I gave up to talk philosophy with you people.
And this is where my career was going, right?
I mean, it was a lot of... It was a lot.
It was a lot.
And... Yeah, better keep up on the tips.
I am aware.
I am aware of the 17 years since I bailed out of that, right?
So yeah, that yeah, and it was that was Canadian dollars, but that was that was that was that was Canadian dollars.
So, the reason I'm telling you all of this is not because you're particularly interested in my salary from a quarter century ago, but because I went from, like, I was broke, I was living in a room, my entire living expenses for, you know, internet, cable, telephone, and a place to live... Somebody guess!
What was I paying a month for almost all of my living expenses?
What was I paying a month?
Just out of curiosity.
Oh, you went from $30,000 to $90,000 overnight?
That's wild, right?
$450,000?
Somebody's guessing $200,000?
$300,000?
Yeah, that's close.
So I was paying $275 a month.
I lived in a house with five other people and I had a nice room.
So I went from like really broke
I mean I was so broke in college that what I used to do was in the campus newspaper there would be a two-for-one offer on subs.
So I would go and get the most loaded up sub that I could possibly get.
I'd get two for one and I'd, you know, stick one in the fridge and I would get like four dinners out of that.
Like, because if you got a big, like double meat sub or whatever, that was a full dinner.
And, uh, I remember there was this place when I lived in Montreal, there was this place, uh, uh, where, near where I lived, had the most amazing souvlaki of $2.75.
It gets this incredible souvlaki.
And I remember like, Ooh, I don't think I can pay for that.
Right.
I also remember buying Scrip.
Like Scrip was like the fiat currency of the, uh, of the, uh,
Cafeteria when I went to Glendon College and I remember towards the end of the year you could get Scrip at 50% off because people just wanted cash right and I'd get Scrip at 50% off and go have lunch and all of that so...
Yeah, I wasn't total Raskolnikov, but it was really, I mean, it was really tight.
I mean, I biked everywhere, of course, and yeah, it was really, really tight.
So I went, in a very short span of time, I went from being totally broke to a pretty good
Pretty good income, right?
That's pretty good.
So the reason I'm saying that is I really cracked through the ceiling of class, right?
I went from lower, lower, lower class to upper middle class, right?
So lower middle class to upper middle class in a year and change.
Now, with that, and hit me with a why if you've ever skipped a class.
If you've ever skipped a class, I don't mean in school, like from, you're supposed to go from like lower lower class, to lower middle, to middle, to upper middle, like you're supposed to sort of, but like straight up, straight to the roof.
So I went from a broadcast student to giving presentations in banks and traveling and staying in, I remember staying at the U.S.
Grant Hotel.
It was $400 a night and it was just a complete paradise.
Like I went from a dingy back room in a house to giving presentations at conferences, like all very, very shortly.
And it's wild!
And I went from working out at the university gym
I didn't get a private, private gym membership, but I had access to the Granite Club, which was a very sort of upper class club and all of that.
And I went from playing Doom on a 386 computer to playing poker at the Granite Club and all of this kind of stuff.
And so what I'm saying about that is
If you're, like, the women want a guy who makes money, right?
They all want the six figures and so on, right?
Here's the thing.
What happens, what happens to your career if your wife gets fat?
This is the funny thing, right?
Like, what happens to your career if your wife gets fat?
Do you know?
Your progress stops.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
See, here's the funny thing.
When you get to the upper classes, when you get to the upper classes, people scan you top to bottom, right?
They scan you top to bottom, man.
It's like, swallow this barium and we're gonna throw you under a lidoscope.
Like, have you ever gone through this process where people just scan you, right?
They'll invite you over to dinner.
They say, bring your wife, bring your girlfriend, bring your fiancee, right?
They want to know the 360 view of you.
Why do they want to do that?
You don't care if you just hire some waiter.
You don't care what his girlfriend is like.
But let's say that you're buying a company and this guy is the chief technical officer.
Why do you want to know who he's dating?
Why do you want to know what his life is like?
Why do you want to go and visit him in his house?
Do you know this?
Yeah, you guys are, oh, I love this audience.
You're so smart.
You're so smart.
Right.
Yeah, you're right.
You're right.
You want to know the ethics.
You want to know the self-confidence.
You want to know strength, aspirations.
You want to know quality of his character.
You want all of this, right?
So if you
If you're buying a company and there's a chief technical officer, you want to know whether he can grow with the company.
Because you're not buying the company for what it is, you're buying the company for the growth, right?
Now, if he's got a pudgy, insecure, afraid of the phone, whatever phobia nonsense is going on, if he's got a pudgy loser wife or pudgy loser girlfriend,
Do you feel that he can hold his own in the top notches of society, which he's going to have to do in order to get investment, in order to get sales, in order to be a mover and a shaker?
Is he going to pass muster?
Most women pay heavily for bearing children.
Stretch marks, saggy boobs, is the physical price.
I'll take the blessings of fatherhood and a great partner over a trophy.
It would project a lack of self-confidence.
Okay, but people like Zuckerberg and Bill Gates.
No, no, Zuckerberg and Bill Gates, they all made their fortunes before they were 30, and they weren't married, and so that's fine.
They don't care about that.
They don't care about that.
And they, yeah, they drove their own fortunes, right?
And so when you... Come on, we all know this, right?
If you meet a guy who seems impressive, but his girlfriend is pudgy and insecure, what do you think of him?
Come on, let's be honest.
Let's stop being nice and polite.
What do you think of a guy?
You know, he's, he's good looking.
He's, he's ambitious.
He seems successful and so on.
And then he's got some pudgy, loser, insecure girlfriend.
What's happening?
Yeah.
What's wrong with him?
Of course.
Now I'm not, I mean, everyone brings up Pierce Brosnan.
His wife is overweight.
It's like, A, he's Catholic.
B, she was gorgeous when she was younger.
C, she could have some health issues.
And so whatever, right?
Yeah.
If you want to judge someone, if you want to judge someone, look at his partner, look at her partner.
We all know this.
We all know this.
Everybody, everybody knows this, right?
We all know this.
This is like, so, so if you, it's just a funny thing.
Women want, women want a guy who makes a lot of money and the same women who want a guy who makes a lot of money are often overweight or lower class.
It seems like a handsome guy with a plain woman is more incongruent than a beautiful woman with a plain guy.
Why would that be?
Because men go for beauty and women go for resources, right?
Men go for beauty, and women go for resources.
I mean, they're both going for genetics in a way, right?
And so, a handsome guy with a plain woman, it's like, well, he's handsome, and handsome people generally tend to make more money, so he's got a leg up in the marketplace, like the better looking you are.
I don't know if you saw this, it's pretty wild.
So, when classes went online, the attractive women in the class got lower marks.
When classes went online,
The attractive women in the class got lower marks.
Like, this is how ridiculous it is.
I mean, it's natural and all of that, but... So, a beautiful woman with a plain guy, a beautiful woman can get a very successful guy.
Because he's looking for beauty.
So a beautiful woman with a plain guy doesn't really make any sense at all.
A handsome guy with a plain woman, that's even more bizarre, because a handsome guy is going to make more money, and if a handsome guy can't make more money, there's something wrong with him as a whole, right?
So, yeah, it doesn't really make any... And a beautiful woman with a plain guy, you just assume that he's very wealthy, right?
Or something like that, right?
So, yeah, I mean, if you want to make money in the business world, you want to move up in the business world, you want to be accepted in the business world, and this is particularly true if you're in your 30s.
If you're single, you're a suspect.
If you don't have kids, you're a suspect.
If your girlfriend or your wife is plain or insecure or nervous or shy, you're a suspect.
Like, you just are.
And so yeah, if this is my note to women out there, like if you want a guy who makes money, good for you.
Fantastic guy.
That's fine with me.
If you want a woman who makes money, you got to really study how to move in top tier circles.
You got to really know how to, what do you talk about?
What, you know, what, what, uh, level of conversation are you going to have?
What topics are allowed?
What, what is not allowed?
Do you feel confident enough to walk up to a guy who's a multimillionaire and engage him in conversation for the sake of your husband's career?
It's wild, right?
All right, let me just see here.
Going for genetics.
Other than beautiful kids, rinse repeat, is there another biological imperative?
I mean,
Having kids is all about genetics, right?
That's the root of all of our, right?
Everything that people do to improve themselves, everything that people do to improve themselves is to fake having better genetics.
It's all fundamentally a lie and it's all hypocritical and manipulative and downright fraudulent, in fact, but everything that people do is to, well, it's two things.
Pretend to have better genetics and to pretend to be younger than you are.
Women can choose whether to exercise after childbirth.
Some give up.
It's an excuse if they stay fat.
Yeah.
What do they call this, right?
I mean, I had a friend of mine when I was younger.
He married his wife as a buck ten, right?
And then she ended up 300 pounds.
I mean, she pulled the pin on that fat grenade like five of them and just went up like a tent.
It was wild.
It was wild.
So, yeah, you need the... So, the women want the wealthy guy.
I don't know, do they want, you know, some trashy wealthy guy who inherited... No, not even that.
Who won the lottery or is, like, a producer for trashy music or something like that.
But, you know, women want... You know, you'd see this with Kevin Samuels, right?
These women would call and say, I want a guy who makes six figures.
And, you know, meanwhile, they look like half a carnival sideshow, right?
And it's like, well, you just... You know, a guy...
Is very aware, a guy who's successful in business is very aware that a lot of the value he gets in business, a lot of the pay he's going to get in business is related to, is related to his wife.
Now, there's another reason.
What's the other reason why people who are investing in you?
Thank you for the tip.
I'm so sorry.
I forgot to ask for tips.
Hey!
Now you know everything I gave up to start this show.
If you could help me out with a tip, I'd really appreciate it.
I didn't used to have to beg.
I didn't used to have to.
I used to have pride.
Now, why else does
Someone who invests in you want to know the quality of your partner.
Why else does he want it?
Bring your wife.
Let's come over for dinner.
I used to get this all the time.
When I first got into business, people didn't know from a hole in the ground.
They didn't know if I was brilliant, if I was an idiot.
They didn't know if I was just pretty.
They didn't know if I could actually code.
They didn't know if I could manage.
They didn't know if I would run off with their investment.
They didn't know anything.
I didn't have a track record.
I didn't have a business degree.
I didn't have a computer science degree.
So they had to judge me.
With no paperwork, no paper trail.
Hi, I have a graduate degree in the history of philosophy.
Why don't you make me chief technical officer and invest a lot of money into me to create software that's gonna sell for millions and millions of dollars?
Like, nobody would believe that.
That's not a believable thing.
Right?
Yes.
MD Cass, you are on it.
You are on it.
Like white on rice.
You are on it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, so yes, can you pick quality people?
That's really, really important.
Do quality people pick you, right?
So if you have a high status, high quality wife, she's confident, she's poised, she's attractive, and by attractive I don't just necessarily mean facially, but you know, she supports you, she's able to have a conversation, she's not intimidated by wealth and power, she is, you know, so because somebody's looking to invest in you and the first thing they want to know is, does a quality person, has a quality person chosen you in the past?
Like, you're coming to me, I remember, like, literally sitting across the table from people and asking them for millions of dollars, right?
We want to expand, we want to grow, we want to open up an office in Vancouver, we want to open up an office in Ann Arbor, we want to, like, we need millions of dollars.
Give me millions of dollars, right?
Now, they didn't do that without a social visit.
Right or wrong?
Like it or not?
I had some track record then, but not for growth, right?
It's one thing to start a company, it's another thing to grow a company, and often the two skills are very different, right?
Which is why the people who make a lot of money, who could both start and grow companies, are so rare and so valuable.
So they want to know if a quality person has chosen you in the past, it makes them much more comfortable to invest in you, right?
I mean, if you're starting a company and you say, oh, Peter Thiel has already invested in the company, people are a lot more comfortable because a quality investor has already chosen you, right?
So we didn't have prior investors in that way, so they had to judge me based on that.
And it was a lot of socializing, right?
Now, the other reason why people want to meet your girlfriend, your wife, whatever, is they want to know, am I going to buy this company and then watch you go through the ringer of family courts for three years while you get divorced?
Right?
Because if you're getting divorced, I'm not investing.
If it looks like you're getting divorced, or even if it looks like this is okay, it's an okay, she's an okay girlfriend, but she's not your final port of call, right?
She's like a doofer for your 20s, right?
She's like a bookmark, a placeholder.
Because then you're going to break up with her and it could get ugly.
And if it gets ugly, which it could,
You're going to be distracted, you're going to be short on sleep, you're going to be short on concentration and the whole thing could fall apart.
Anybody who's an investor knows that a man cannot succeed if his wife doesn't support him, is not enthusiastic about what he's doing.
So he wants to meet her so he can try and figure out, you know investors are very good at reading people, he wants to meet her so he can figure out
If she's down with what you're doing, is she excited about what you're doing?
Is she supporting?
Will she go to the ends of the earth?
Will she cover bases?
Will she do what needs to be done for you to be free and available?
Will she complain if you have to work late three nights in a row or have to go away for the weekend and whatever, right?
Is she going to be fine with that?
Is she going to be, yep, I'm 100% behind it, right?
Yeah, divorce can destroy a man's productivity for years.
Absolutely.
And also, here's another thing too.
Um, if you're investing in a man, and again, this could be a woman too, but if you're investing in a man, you want to pay him, right?
You're going to pay him.
Let's say you're paying him $200,000 a year, right?
So $200,000 a year, you're paying him.
Now, if he gets divorced, a lot of that money is going to go to lawyers.
A lot of that money is going to go to accountants.
A lot of that money is going to go out the window.
So you're no longer paying him.
You're now paying his lawyers.
You're now paying the court system.
You're now paying whatever, his accountants.
You're now paying all of this.
You're now paying for a second home.
So you're not paying him anymore.
If I'm paying someone, I want to pay that person.
I don't want to pay his lawyers, his accountants, his wife, his real estate agent, his second house.
He's like, I don't want to pay.
I don't want to pay them.
They're not working for me.
I want to pay him directly.
Because everyone else, you get divorced, all of those extra bills just overhead, right?
Now, if you go and meet someone's wife, and you say, oh, you know, how have you experienced all of this?
Entrepreneurship that your husband's doing, how's that for you?
And she's like, oh man, it's, you know, it's been really tough, you know, I'm mixed bag about it, blah, blah, blah.
Okay, then she's not in, she's not on board, right?
Whereas if she's like, man, it can be tough, but I love it, I'm so proud of him, I'm excited, I just want him to go to the moon, right?
You can't be any more successful than your partner!
And it's funny, you know, because women generally just have this thing like, like the man is just out there completely independent of her.
Like he's broken orbit, he's going through interstellar space.
The man's out there just completely independent of her.
And... She just says, money's coming in.
No, no, no.
As a wife, you are absolutely integral to your husband's success.
Somebody says, Denzel Washington's wife hangs on his every word at events.
Yeah.
Yeah, for sure.
And also they want to see a medium of physical fitness, right?
They don't want to see you super muscled, because then you're spending three hours a day in the gym, which means you're less available.
But they also don't want to see you like total pizza dough boy Mr. Pear, because that means that you're going to have low energy and health issues and so on.
So yeah, they're looking, right?
So brains are more important than beauty once you get to middle age.
Your hot but dumb girlfriend won't cut it when you grow up to be a success and she doesn't develop her mind to compensate for the looks going.
Rights.
Rights.
However, looks and intelligence are related.
That's why we're attracted to looks.
Right?
So you understand, like, even features indicate good genetics.
Large jaws indicate good genetics.
It means that you've got enough food, you've got enough nutrition, which means your parents are good providers, which means you're going to be a good provider.
Bald is attractive to some women because bald is an excess of testosterone, or more testosterone than the average, which means you are good at aggressive situations.
You're confident in conflict situations and you're probably pretty good at going out there and getting resources, right?
A round head, right, means that you were carried, not just laid down, right?
Because, you know, a lot of people laid in their crib and their heads are soft because their parents aren't taking care of them.
They get this flat head or like odd cone heads or whatever, right?
So you got a round head because you were carried and it means that your parents are really strongly invested in you.
You've got good bonding mechanisms and you're not just dumped in a... right?
So you understand, right?
You understand.
So...
Looks, good looks indicate good genetics.
So like, you know, the hot but dumb girlfriend is real cliche.
Like, it's really not.
Particularly true.
Most people who are physically attractive tend to have higher intelligence, and you understand that's exactly why we would, right, that's why the looks and our attraction to those looks would develop.
Like, it could be the case that, you know, there are some tribes in Africa where the guy with the huge belly is the most attractive, or maybe there's some tribes where giant noses are really attractive or whatever, but for the most part we're looking for good genes and that's even features, right?
Here I am.
Waving myself right like if you've got you know these odd I don't know like Prince Charles Flycatcher ears or something like that that that flap like a jet engine when you're in a car in a convertible So yeah, you're looking for
You're looking for markers of good.
Like, you know, there's this whole thing about how, like, there's the nerds who are super intelligent and the jocks who are just kind of dumb.
You know, that's all propaganda, right?
The jocks tend to be very intelligent and people who are physically unattractive.
Again, it's not an absolute statement, but yeah, looks and IQ are often
Right, so where do good-looking women generally... Again, there's lots of exceptions, there's lots of scatter shots in genetics.
Where do good-looking women come from?
They come from good-looking mothers.
Right?
They come from good-looking mothers.
Now, good-looking mothers are chosen by who?
Dumb men or smart men?
Or, to put it in another way, the good-looking women, who do they want as their husbands?
The fathers of their children.
They want smart, capable, and able men.
Right?
So yeah, this hot but dumb girlfriend, it's rare compared to the average.
Again, it happens and all of that, but it's rare.
Let's see here.
For men who have been screwed by the family and have a steep learning curve for social skills, what's the potential for men in this situation?
Self-employment?
Sole proprietor?
I mean, obviously I've been an entrepreneur for like 30 years, so I'm keen on that kind of stuff for sure.
Yep, going through school I noticed that a lot of the jocks were also on the honor roll.
Yeah.
So, I mean, think of brain speed, right?
Reflexes are correlated to intelligence, and reflexes are also necessary to be good at sports, right?
So, if you have fast reflexes, you tend to be smarter.
Fast reflexes are essential for being good at sports as well.
My wife is constantly amazed at my reflexes.
Like, just amazed.
Like, when I'm up close, we're playing doubles, say, pickleball or whatever, right?
And I'm up close, and just... I'm like...
She can barely even see my hands I'm blurring so fast, right?
Like my reflexes are quite mental as far as that goes.
And the intelligent people will usually make themselves the most attractive they can within their potential, right?
Asian reflexes.
Yeah, I remember doing business in China in 2000 and playing table tennis with the business partners I was working with in China and I'm afraid all the cliches were absolutely true.
Yeah, Dolph Lundgren has a degree in chemical engineering.
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
Most of the jocks at my high school were Asian.
Yeah, certainly the case.
Asian reflexes, of course, are notably rapid, right?
All right.
Yeah.
So I just, you know, if you're a woman out there and you want a quality man, I say fantastic.
Fantastic.
But you better know how you enhance a man's earning, right?
A woman is not independent of the man's earning.
A woman is not independent of the man's earning.
And the woman's support is essential to the man's success.
All right.
I am happy to take more topics.
I obviously have more topics and I'm looking at the tips and I really don't want to cry on Independence Day.
I don't want to cry.
Somebody says, my ex-wife was pretty and clever when she was young, graduate lawyer, but she stagnated intellectually because she didn't need
To use her brain much in life.
Meanwhile, I have had 30 years of professional life to hone my brain.
The gap between us intellectually is too big nowadays for us to have much conversation.
She didn't use... My ex-wife didn't... She didn't need to use her brain much in life?
Hmm... I'm a little confused.
So she was married to you, but she did not need to use her brain?
I'm finding that this does not compute in my head.
She spent a lot of time with me, man.
We were married, living together.
She just didn't need to use her brain at all.
You didn't have intellectual conversations with her?
You didn't challenge and excite her intellectually?
I'm a little... I'm a little baffled.
Alright, let's see here.
How does being single or unmarried in your late 20s look?
Nothing looks bad as long as you've learned your lessons, right?
As long as you've learned your lessons, nothing looks bad.
You know, I mean, I was single in my thirties before I got married, but I had done my therapy.
I had learned, learned my lessons.
So if you've learned your lessons, um, that's fine.
But if you're, uh, if you're still immature and foolish in your twenties, well, it's no good, right?
Did you make a truth about moving slash rising between classes?
I notice many successful people are weary of those who are beneath them and some gatekeep sometimes for good reason.
Rights.
Okay, I will read to you a little bit from Hit Me With A Why if you've read my novel The Future.
Have you read my novel The Future?
And if you haven't, what the hell have you been doing with your time?
It's a great book.
And it's free!
It's free!
Freedom!
All right.
Let's see here.
View.
Details.
I don't want the cover art.
There we go.
All right.
So in it, I have a character.
Oh, come on.
I know it's my book.
I know it's in there.
Stop telling me it's not there.
Ah, yes.
Here we go.
Right.
So this is a guy.
I'm writing about a guy who got money.
My friend Hamish was a... I'm sorry, this is chapter 14.
There's no particular spoilers in here.
My friend Hamish was predatory, man.
Cold-hearted, even by my standards.
I was able to freeze my heart in the pursuit of power, or either freeze one half of my heart, the half that felt what others feel, and use that excess heat to fuel the other half that burned to dominate and control.
Hamish had had it rough, there's no doubt.
His father went slowly mad in a grating, whining, insistent, follow-you-around-the-house-nagging kind of way.
See, crazy parents who go random are one thing.
Crazy parents who get obsessive and invasive are quite another.
His dad is a low-rent manager in some boring industrial concern, the kind of guy who wears a polyester short-sleeved shirt with armpit stains and an empty pocket protector.
He was never much of anything.
I met him when he was still pretty functional.
And he was terrifying in his bland, predictable, forgettable face in a crowd kind of way.
I mean, we all end up being forgotten in one way or another.
At least, all of our secret thoughts vanish and scatter like morning dew.
Unless someone writes them down, of course.
Which is why I want to have power.
If you have power, who cares about being forgotten?
You have extracted everything possible out of life already.
Hamish's dad was a blank wall.
A polystyrene construct of a pretend human being.
He had standard statements and standard jokes and standard opinions.
A mirage of identity hovering over a deep chasm of nothing.
He was too frightened to live so he just paraded and pretended and regurgitated.
And life has a way of erasing those who erase themselves.
After a while, his dad just started slowly going around the bend.
It wasn't exaggerated to begin with, although it quickly progressed to that.
He would forget a few things, be unaccountably late or absent.
But soon he would obsessively begin to peck at something.
At someone in the house.
His wife, their cats, or Hamish.
I was there one night when Hamish's dad took objection to something Hamish was wearing and barred his exit from the house until he promised to change his belt.
Oh, everyone knows how it goes in the teenage years.
You comply and comply.
And then, in a moment, you stop complying and you're willing to fight to the virtual death rather than submit.
Any parent with half a brain plans for this inevitable rebellion.
But this all happened at the worst possible time.
Hamish was screaming at his dad.
His dad was screaming back.
His mother was hiding upstairs.
And it was all so useless, so pointless.
God, you wouldn't believe how many people bleed off their essential energies on stupid fights of no importance.
People battle themselves into atoms over a lipstick color, the length of a skirt, who drank the last milk, who forgot to refill the car.
Combat energies that should be reserved for the end times for Ragnarok or Resurrection are squandered on stupid nothings.
And people end up hating each other over whether a son is wearing the right belt or one that is a little bit worn.
I remember Hamish screaming with rage at his father that he hated the crazy old man.
And his father, with stupid avoidance, stubbornness, insisting that Hamish change his belt, that no self-respecting man would leave the house wearing a worn-out belt.
Of course, thinking about it now, the belt was the dad's might, worn to a thread, ready to snap.
And that reminds me how often people sink their brittle yellow mental fangs into an analogy that represents themselves, but genuinely believe that they are fighting something external.
Which is why the fight never ends.
So Hamish was my poor relation.
His mother had come into money from some distant relative and he was heaved up from the lower classes into our exclusive
School!
I guess he was the school's poor relation as well.
He knew he didn't fit in, and like most families that came into sudden money, he used it to detach himself from his former poverty-stricken strictness.
People who grow up poor can't really afford to screw around unless they want to sink into the general quicksand of the welfare state.
And so he was disciplined as hell when he was younger, by all reports.
But when his family got money, his father went crazy, his mother got sick, and he squandered his money like a formerly fat girl squanders her virginity.
He bought computers so powerful that they caused the lights to dim when he turned them on.
He bought a Jeep, invested in random startups, got taken for everything, almost, and was about to sink back down into the lower classes.
His trajectory like a cannon shot high in the air, returning from whence it came.
When his mother died and he inherited more money from her, from her death, her insurance.
Getting money dissolves the poor.
Losing money dissolves the rich.
It's better for most people to just stay where they are, where they started, and not get notions above their station, as the old British saying went.
Poor people who get money are like accidental immigrants to a wildly foreign culture that they can never understand.
Their money pushes away everyone they grew up with, all their relations, everyone they know.
But it doesn't bring them any closer to people who have learned how to live with their money for at least a couple of generations.
So they end up adrift, abandoned, homeless, without a tribe.
Their poor relations claw at them, both trying to bring themselves up and bring them down.
But their isolation and desperation keep all the members of the old money club at a distance.
Also, what's the point of getting to know someone who recently came into money when odds are they will just end up flailing and falling back into their poverty?
But I liked Hamish.
He was crazy talented.
He could play a guitar, sing well, he wrote music, wrote bitter short stories, acted in plays.
Learned the arcane and ancient art of darkroom photography.
He was not very attractive.
He had a kind of low-rent elfin look with his half-pajama shirt, skinny jeans, and cobbler's shoes.
Knowing his limitations, he decided to go for the too-cynical-to-breathe shtick.
See, people who come into money also think that they are coming into attractiveness.
But the alpha females of the old money club are well aware of how dissolving new money can be.
Socially, we all like to wait for at least a couple of years.
A couple of generations, sometimes.
Just to see if the money sticks around.
Or if the idiots just blow it and vanish.
Are they a stable boat?
Or a leaping whale?
I didn't think that Hamish would sink back down.
At least, not all the way.
He had too great a horror of poverty to end up tumbling down to the bottom of the stairs.
But accidental good fortune is the greatest spur of vanity in the human heart.
And because he had money, he also thought he had acumen, intelligence, and wisdom.
So he was pathetically easy to exploit.
He tried, dipping down to the middle classes, to show off his money and scavenge among the materially desperate daughters of the endlessly striving
However, his corrosive cynicism put off the fathers who worked to squelch any budding romances.
Hamish New.
Deep down, that he would need to dip even further to the daughters of the single mother brigade who would leap at his money like suicidal fish into a bloody boat.
But that was too far down for his pride, so he flirted and skirted around the edges of our alpha females, our precious egg maidens, who were polite and distant and utterly untempted.
Anyway, so that was my sort of little description of Petit Bourgeoisie, right?
Of somebody who's coming to money, who wants to rise in the cynicism and skepticism of those who are watching him come up, so.
I hope that you will check out the book.
It's a great book.
This guy's very cynical and all of that, right?
All right, let me get to your questions and comments.
As a negative example, my wife gave me hell on a regular basis and since we got divorced my salary has nearly doubled.
Well, so that's a woman who's holding you down, right?
A woman who's holding you down.
Philosophy question for a day or future date.
Archetypical philosophers would be Plato and Socrates, but what about modern personalities like Karl Marx?
He might be dead wrong on everything, but was he a bad philosopher?
Or do we need to carve out a space for him as a bad economist or bad theologian?
Theologian?
Theologian?
So, Karl Marx was a Satanist, right?
I mean, he was, he worshipped Satan, he had entire poems dedicated to his love and praise of Satan.
So, yeah, he was a materialist Satanist and he provided the greatest temptation which now hundreds of millions of people have, or billions of people, have been seduced into giving up their freedoms in return for free stuff.
And so, yeah, he was a finger puppet of the horny one.
Of course, I've got The Truth About Karl Marx on my website, fdrpodcast.com is the way to go with that.
But yeah, I mean, Karl Marx was just a straight-up Satanist.
Hey, Steph, are you streaming this on Rumble, too?
No, I'm not.
I don't know how to stream to this and to Rumble.
I can go to Rumble, but I go to where the tips are, because people respond to incentives.
And although the tips are not super great today, I have full confidence that I'm providing enough value that there'll be a tip or two more before the end of the day.
Because I'd like to grow the income so that I can do more with the show.
The income is stagnant.
And unfortunately, because I'm hiring people, the income is diminishing.
So whatever you can do to help support, I would really appreciate it.
I can only do as well as you permit.
All right.
Lewis Staten was one of my favorite characters.
I loved seeing the world and social interactions through his eyes.
It's refreshing.
Yes, he is a wild personality to write.
He was a wild personality to write.
Somebody says, I've had a terrible sinking feeling in my gut this whole show.
I think I'm a low quality person and have a lot to work on.
Thank you for your work in general and this show in particular, Steph.
You've got that sinking feeling!
Yeah, sorry about that.
If it's any consolation, I really, really struggled to get to a more confident place.
I remember when I first got into the business world, I was pretty confident in the academic world.
Where I was both loved and hated as I've always been.
Always been loved and hated over the course of my life.
There seems to be nothing in between.
I suppose that's a mark of virtue.
I hope so.
I remember giving a presentation at one of the biggest companies around.
And I had finished, I was up at the gesturing and doing the presentation and I gave the presentation.
I had no idea whether to sit down or stay standing.
I had no idea.
I didn't know if I was going to be gesturing more.
And I remember someone who I was working with wrote on a piece of paper and turned it towards me with their computer in the way so that they couldn't see.
Sit down.
I didn't even know whether to sit or stand in the presentation.
That's how clueless I was.
So.
All right, let me get here.
Do you agree that reparations will destroy many a person for reasons said in your book?
So, people who are wise keep their money.
People who are foolish lose their money.
And again, I mean, I know a lot of people keep their money through government coercion.
I'm talking about in a free market, right?
A fool and his money are soon parted, is the old Satan, right?
Karl Marx is a Satanist.
Well, that explains all the red, lol, yeah.
Somebody says, I've done a lot of therapy, go to dance classes, ask women out at the coffee shop, but I'm still finding it hard to find a girlfriend.
I'm all for taking 150% responsibility for all that.
I do think I have more work to do therapy-wise, and I'm wondering if I'd find more dating success in another city.
I live in a place with a lot of transplants, and I wonder if that means there's even more I-don't-want-to-settle-down-until-my-thirties women than usual for millennials.
I'm finding it hard to find a girlfriend.
All right, so I just want to know how common this is.
Could you hit me with a Y if you're single and looking for a girlfriend or boyfriend?
Hit me with a Y if you're single and looking for a boyfriend or a girlfriend.
Right.
Yes.
Okay, so yeah, a lot of people.
All right.
Would you like a Pickup 101?
Would you like a Pickup 101 lesson?
Don't say thirsty.
That's rude.
It's not thirsty.
Not thirsty.
Thirsty is dismissive and negative.
No, they want love.
They want to be part of the great cycle of life.
They want to continue, right?
All right.
Hey, did you know sperm is an antidepressant?
Give me your coffee.
Got it, got it, got it.
Right, okay, so I will claim some success.
in being a pickup artist.
And look, I know I'm not bad looking or anything like that, but it was more than that.
Because, you know, I went bald really early, so I had that kind of handicap, so to speak, which for a lot of women that is kind of a handicap.
Some women like it, but most would prefer a nice head of hair as would most men.
So, first of all, don't approach any woman unless you find her immensely attractive.
Don't approach any woman unless you find her immensely attractive.
So when you're more attracted to a woman, you're more afraid of rejection, so generally you might aim a little low.
Don't aim low.
Unless you find the woman, like your eyes just keep being drawn to her.
She's got a fantastic laugh.
She's got a light in her eyes.
She's got something about her, not just, you know, looks or whatever.
She's got something about her spirit that just really elevates you.
Do not approach a woman
Who's second or third tier for you.
I'm not talking objectively, right?
Okay.
Number one, do never approach a woman unless you simply can't stop looking at her.
Like she's that appealing to you.
Because you have to assume in life that women know everything all the time.
So if you're approaching a woman and she's not the woman you most want, how is she going to receive that?
Right?
How is she going to receive you aiming low for her?
Like, imagine this.
Imagine there are two girls, Mary and Sally.
Mary's a 10 to you, and Sally's a 7.
And you ask out Mary, and Mary says no, and then you say to Sally, well, how about you?
How does Sally feel?
She knows she's second or third choice, right?
She knows she's not the one that you came over to talk to.
Yeah.
A woman who feels like you're asking her out of insecurity, you're asking her, like, without being hugely drawn to her, she's not going to respond positively.
She's not going to respond positively.
In the Dungeons and Dragons movie, there's this elfish woman who's pursued by the black wizard and she's finally, she's like, oh fine, you know, whatever, right?
Yeah, women always know if they're number one in a man's eyes.
Always.
And a woman wants to feel that you are madly drawn to her.
Now, why does a woman want to feel that you're madly drawn to her?
Why?
Why does she need that?
Why does she need that?
Yeah.
Commitment.
She needs to know that you can bond with her.
She needs to know that she is the most attractive to you because if she's not the most attractive to you, if you're her second or third choice, then when she's, you're going to date her until your first choice comes along and then you're going to dump her.
Right?
So you got to know how women work.
I never ever approached a woman unless I was just ridiculously drawn to her.
Never.
Why?
Would you want to be somebody else's second or third choice?
Would you want, like, she asks, she goes and approaches two of your friends and then they both say no to her and she's like, oh, fine, okay, what's your number?
Right?
So, yeah, this is tip number one.
Tell me if these tips are helpful.
I want to make sure I'm providing value.
Don't approach a woman unless you're hugely drawn to her.
Also, the less you approach a woman, the fresher your approach will be.
And, you know, like this, I never normally do this, right?
So if you never normally do this, the woman will be very flattered.
Now, she may say yes, she may say no, whatever, right?
But the woman will be very flattered because you don't normally do this, but you'll make an exception for her.
It's called the cold approach, right?
Don't approach a woman if you're not already in a good mood.
If you've got bad news, if you're worried about something, don't bother.
Don't try.
Because you need to be at peak excellence.
You need to be at peak positivity in order to approach a woman.
So if you're really drawn to her, if you're very drawn to her, and you just, if you can't get yourself into a good mood, don't even try.
Now, that's number two, right?
Number one, don't approach her unless you're totally drawn to her.
Number two, don't approach her if you're not in a great mood, right?
Number three.
This is a challenge.
Number three.
Well, if you're always worried, then you've got to deal with your anxiety, right?
Because no woman is going to... Like, women are already anxious enough, right?
Women score higher in trait neuroticism, so a woman does not want an anxious man.
Because you're just going to feed off each other until you, I don't know, pass out or something, right?
Okay, are you ready for number three?
Alright.
If you are scared of her, do not approach her.
Say, oh no, but I'm scared of rejection.
But if your interest in her is not enough to make the fear of rejection go away, I know that sounds counter-contradictory, so just give me a second here, right?
So if you're just drawn to this woman and you're just so interested in talking to her that you almost forget like you're scared, right?
If you can't forget your fear, then you're approaching her
In the least attractive state possible, which is a state of fear.
If you can't make a joke, if you can't make a positive comment, if you can't... whatever it is that you're saying, right?
Just give her a big smile and say, you know, whatever, whatever comes to your mind.
Again, I can't tell you what to say because I'm not you and there's no... I don't do lines because lines are like a personality graph that turns into a mutant, right?
You've got to be authentic and yourself, right?
Turn and give her a big smile.
What are you reading?
Or, you know, this is my fourth coffee today or whatever it is, right?
Whatever it's going to be.
I have to leave Europe.
I'm most afraid of telling a joke here.
Right.
Right.
I mean, if you can't say anything risky, you can't be yourself, right?
Because if you're listening to the show, sorry, you're already in a risky category.
So.
So if you are scared,
To talk to her.
And I don't mean, like, if she was just some elderly Asian gentleman you were asking to borrow the sports section of the newspaper.
Like, if you're scared to talk to her, don't ask her.
Because you've got to be so drawn to her that your fear means virtually nothing to you.
And all you're doing, and here's the thing too, odds are she's going to be in a relationship, odds are she's not available, odds... So, you're going to strike out more than you're going to succeed.
I mean, not me, I'm just kidding, right?
So, that's fine.
All you're doing is throwing out a feeler.
The throwing out the feeler.
Does she want to chat back?
Now, she may chat with you for five minutes and mention she has a boyfriend.
She may chat with you for three minutes and then say she has to go and it's too soon to ask for her number.
Whatever, whatever.
That's fine.
Because every time you talk to a woman, it's going to get easier.
Every time you talk to a man, it's going to get easier.
So if you see a woman you can't stop and you're just, you're dying.
You're dying to talk to her.
Fantastic.
You know, sit down next to her and wait for something to bubble up.
Like, you can't will a relationship.
You gotta let your instincts.
Deep down in there, you've got the instincts.
How do you know that?
Because you come from a long line of successful wooers.
Like, you gotta understand this about yourself.
Do you follow me?
You come from a long line of successful wooers.
How do we know that?
Obviously, right?
How do we know that you have built-in player?
How do we know?
How do we know that you have built-in WooSuccess?
Because you're not, you know, because everybody before you reproduced.
Everyone before you.
It's how we all got here.
Everyone before you, back to single-celled organisms.
We all know how to chat with women.
We all know how, like, you know.
So you try and will it, because, you know, we're a very intellectual group here.
So you try and think it through and will it and go through the decision branches and like, no, no, no, this is an instinctual thing.
You know, like trust that you know how to talk to girls because if you didn't have those genes you wouldn't be here and there's no way that those genes were there for four billion years and just completely ended with you.
PC problem I had.
Are we on step three or four now?
Dude.
Just listen.
All of your ancestors were successful at wooing women and wooing men.
All of them.
That's in you.
Don't doubt that that's in you.
I mean, like the pickup artistry stuff is like, I'm going to write 27 blog articles on how to urinate.
No, your ancestors were alpha.
Now, are you ready for the next step?
What are you doing when you talk to a woman?
What are you trying to do?
What are you trying to do when you talk to a woman?
What are you trying to do?
I bet you're going to get this wrong.
You're trying to vet her.
You're trying to engage in conversation, convince her that your seat is worthy.
Vet her.
Get her to know her and let her know you.
Win over her heart.
No.
The first thing you're trying to do with a woman, you sit down at a coffee shop or wherever you're at a gym, you talk to her.
The first thing you're trying to do with a woman is find out one thing and one thing only.
Is she friendly?
Is she friendly?
That's all you're trying to do.
Not, will she go out with you?
What's her level of integrity?
Will she bear your seed?
Will she give you triplets?
You're not trying to find out, will she give you her number?
You are not trying to find out anything except one thing.
Is she friendly?
Is she friendly?
That's all you're trying to find out.
You're not trying to get married.
You're not trying to figure out her level of integrity or whether she wants kids or what her political ideology is.
You're not trying to find out any of that.
Is she friendly?
Now, if she's not friendly, if she's hostile, if she's negative, then she's not for you.
Is she friendly?
Listen, people come up and chat with me.
I go up and chat with people.
I enjoy it.
I've always loved people.
I've always loved chatting with people.
That's why I do what I do.
I love chatting with people.
It's a great honor for me to do this, although I still appreciate tips.
Is she friendly?
You know, like, I'll smile and chat with someone, and if they're unfriendly, it's like, oh, just stop, right?
Is she friendly?
One.
Is she vaxxed?
Two.
Right.
Right.
Right.
All you're trying to figure out is, is she friendly?
Is she friendly?
Because if she's negative or hostile, she's not for you.
Is she friendly?
I'd be cautious with overly friendly people.
Yes, too much is too much.
What a great insight you're adding.
Well, you know, if it's too much, that's too much.
See, putting the word overly doesn't reveal anything.
It doesn't reveal everything.
I'd be cautious about exaggerated gestures.
It's like, what does that mean?
How can I gauge, right?
Overly friendly, what does that mean, right?
So you're throwing in caution without any objective standard, right?
Now, I get that.
Like, I mean, if you're in a bar at 11 o'clock on a Friday night and some absolutely stunning woman comes up and tries to chat you up, yeah, she's probably a prostitute.
But no, you ask her a question, you make a comment.
Is she friendly?
Does she want to chat with you, right?
Because let's say that the woman is single and let's say that she's in a place and not averse to meeting someone, then she's going to be friendly.
Right?
And I get it.
You know, the culture and society has trained a lot of women to be hostile.
All you're trying to do.
Psychopaths are well known as friendly and smiling people.
Boy, aren't you?
Aren't you fun to have a conversation with?
Yes, it's true.
But it acts murderous.
Wow, you're gonna have some real challenging times meeting people, aren't you?
Well, it could be all fun and games until you end up chloroformed in the backseat of her car, being driven off a cliff, right?
But psychopath!
Right.
That's pretty funny.
So yes, you may not be able to get over your fear if you're afraid of having somebody wear your skin, dancing in the moonlight.
Vocal fry!
Bye!
Well yeah, so the other thing too, so that's my first step, is she friendly?
My first step, is she friendly?
The second thing that I have is, is she natural?
So VocalFry is
Like, uh, Total Valley Girl, and you don't really meet these people very much, but you know, if people have this kind of cliched way of talking or a mechanical way of talking or an NPC kind of lilt to their voice, eh, not particularly important.
The guy said, didn't mean to rub you the wrong way.
No need for sarcasm.
Sorry for wasting your time.
Oh, so now we get passive aggression, right?
See, I'm trying to teach people something positive and you're saying, yes, but psychopaths, right?
So you understand that you're, I mean, you're working directly against what it is that I'm trying to help people understand how to meet people, how to get married, how to have kids, how to, you know, there's a lot of single people here and I'm trying, just so you know where I'm coming from, right, is that I'm trying to make people, give people the tools to be enthusiastic and go out and meet people.
And you're saying, no, but there are psychopaths.
Right.
So.
It's like I'm teaching people how to pet dogs and you're saying, yes, but rabies.
And it's like, that's not helpful.
It's just, it's not helpful.
And you are undermining what it is that I'm doing.
So it's kind of annoying.
Like, I'll be frank with you.
I'll be, you know, I'm not making this a hostile way.
Right.
So I'm trying to help people become enthusiastic about talking to and meeting people because it looks like the number one thing that people want here is a relationship.
And you're like, well, but psychopaths!
Right?
So you're working directly against my purpose, which is annoying to me, right?
So.
And it's about you, right?
It's about you and your fears.
It's not about what's best for other people, right?
I'm following along Steph.
We were on step four, ready for step five.
Okay, so what's in step five?
Whether they're natural?
Is that right?
We're on step five.
Are they natural?
Yes, 4 was friendly, 5 is natural, right?
Now, here's the thing.
So we go past friendly, we go past natural.
The next thing, the next thing, what's your guess?
What's the next thing?
Available?
No, too soon for that.
Family.
Sincere.
Well, sincere is the same as natural.
Lip fillers.
Critical thinker.
Is she virtuous?
Too soon for that.
Sense of humor.
You know, I hear what you mean, but sense of humor is not a virtue.
Right?
I mean, just spend time with the average comedian who seems to be half a psychopath anyway.
A sense of humor is not a virtue.
And I wouldn't necessarily want to blame people who don't happen to have a sense of humor in their mind for being somehow less desirable or worthy.
Interested.
Honest.
Hygiene puts her phone away.
Reciprocity.
Right.
Yes.
Paper Eater, you are bang on.
Is she curious?
Is she curious?
Is she curious?
So what that means is, you know, you're going to chat with her a little bit, you're going to ask her some questions.
Is she curious?
I mean, reciprocity is kind of important there as well, right?
So when I was a single guy, and one day, maybe on my deathbed, I'll talk about the number of women I've dated.
So I hope that I have a little bit of credibility here.
I've dated a lot of women and then met the great woman who I've been with for well over 20 years, and it's been fantastic.
I hope you understand that I, and a lot of the women that I met was, was cold approaches, right?
So I've had, I do have some real experience here and I hope that this, and again, I know things have changed, but you know, there's some things that are still the same.
So for me, if I chatted with a woman and she was friendly and she was natural, I would ask, I would spend, you know, five minutes asking her questions.
If she didn't ask me anything back, I would thank her for her time and I would move on.
Right?
Because if it's all about her, right?
Because a lot of these things are, is she rude?
Right?
So friendly, curious, positive, and so on.
This is, is she rude?
Right?
Because, you know, if she's just kind of dismissive or she's just kind of rude or whatever, right?
And this is not a male-female thing.
I mean, if somebody were to, like, when I was younger, if I was reading a book and somebody was like, oh, what are you reading?
I'd be like, oh, I'm reading this, right?
Just man-woman didn't really matter, right?
So, um, I just wouldn't be like, ugh, you know, I don't want to talk to you, right?
Like just, it's rude, right?
Is she, is she right?
This could be advice for finding friends and business partners.
Yeah.
I mean, see right now you're vetting to see if you like her.
See, attracted to her is one thing and that's important.
Do you like her?
Right?
So attracted to, she's worth talking to.
And then you go through a series of filters.
Do I like her?
Right?
Because if you don't like her, don't waste your time.
Don't waste her time.
She's looking for someone of lower quality.
Do I like her?
Now, the way that you find out if she likes you is, is she curious about you?
Does she view you talking to her as an insult or a compliment?
That's important, right?
It's tough for a guy sometimes to go up and talk to a girl.
And so all you're doing is you're gauging her response to see if you like her.
That's all you're doing.
I'm attracted to her.
I have to keep looking at her.
And look, we all know this.
Haven't you had this?
You've had this.
You've just seen a girl and, you know, it's like that Michael Corleone thunderbolt, right?
It's just like, oh my God.
Wow.
She's incredible, right?
It could be the laugh.
It could be the look.
It could be the glow in the eyes.
It could be the positivity.
It could be any number of things, right?
Yes.
Love in the eyes, stars in the eyes.
We all know this, right?
I still remember, honestly, like this is, I remember in my twenties, sitting across from a woman in the subway and like, I still remember what she looked like.
She was just fantastic.
Like just had this great light and all of that.
And I remember looking at getting out and looking at her as the subway took her away and out of my life forever.
Like you never see the regetta in the subway.
Right.
And it was just like, wow.
Right.
Do you like her?
Because we're often, you know, we're very concerned in general about whether people like us, and then we forget whether we like them, that person or not.
Do I like her?
Do I enjoy having a conversation with her?
And so, people who are polite, you know, do you know one of the basic definitions of politeness for me?
Just so you know, one of the basic definitions of politeness.
So, a polite person... Okay, let me ask you this, right?
Let's say that you are carrying a bunch of stuff into your house.
There's someone in your house.
They see you're overburdened.
What do they do?
Yeah, they help.
They offer to take some of the load, right?
So somebody who's narcissistic, you do all the work, right?
You understand that when you're doing all the work, it's because you're with a narcissist.
Which is why I have the whole curiosity thing.
The curiosity thing weeds out the narcissist.
Right, so the friendliness thing weeds out the mentally ill, or the hostile, or the hyper-feminist, or whatever it is, right?
Are they friendly?
Do they have a positive view of life?
Are they generally mentally healthy, right?
Are they curious?
Or are they natural?
Means, do they like themselves?
Because somebody who puts on some ridiculous generic vocal fry crap, right?
Someone who does all of that doesn't like themselves.
They have to adopt another personality in order to feel like they can be of value in the world or have things interesting, right?
But the curiosity thing is designed to weed out the narcissist, right?
Because if they enjoy having questions asked, the fundamental thing is basic empathy, right?
I, if I'm carrying too much
If I see someone carrying too much, I will offer to help because I would like to be helped and therefore write basic empathy thing, right?
So, is she... Is she... empathetic?
So, a politeness is when somebody helps you carry the load.
You know, I mean, if you're carrying a lot of bags, and you're with a girl, and you have to go, and she's going to open the door, right?
She's going to open the door.
Because that's basic empathy.
That's like, does she, right?
So, these are all designed to weed out dysfunctional people.
So, you know, this guy, this is why I was annoyed by the guy talking about the psychopath earlier, right?
Because all of this is designed to help weed out the psychopath, but he didn't let me get to that stuff, right?
So he's just bringing up the fears before I've talked about what all this is for, right?
That's why it's kind of annoying.
It's like, dude, just wait five minutes.
Hang in there.
Oh, really?
I was raised by a mentally ill, abusive person, but trust me, I have no idea that there are dangerous people out there.
Boy, I had no idea.
I've had bomb threats, death threats, physical attacks, but no idea there were dangerous people out there.
No idea.
It's kind of funny, right?
Somebody says, I remember riding a subway and a gal and I had a pleasant conversation about her ski trip.
She barely blinked the whole three minutes.
She mentioned a boyfriend just before I asked her number.
Now, see, that's a woman who's polite.
Because she's helping you to not be embarrassed or, you know, maybe humiliated or whatever, right?
So she is mentioning the boyfriend.
Of course she should, right?
Of course you should.
Does she assist you in the conversation, right?
Does she assist you in the conversation?
Does she take some part of the burden onto herself, right?
So, right, like you have taken the effort of talking to a woman and she then wants, if she likes you, she's going to want to show that she appreciates that and she's willing to take some of the burden, right?
It's very nice.
It's very nice.
Oh, and what are your hobbies?
Or what, you like this book?
What else of his have you read?
What other books do you like?
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, right?
I used to fall in love on airplanes.
Airplanes is dicey, man.
I've had conversations with women on airplanes.
It's really dicey.
Because if it goes well, that's a whole lot of going well.
And if it goes badly, that's a whole lot of going badly.
There's a little bit too muchness on airplanes for me.
A little too muchness.
All right.
The social isolation and work from home stuff has degraded my social skills a little.
Yeah, I'm sorry about that, Dan.
I mean, I get that.
I understand that.
That's not at all uncommon.
So yeah, I sympathize with that.
I sympathize with that.
Alright, so let me ask you this.
Hit me with a why.
Are you at a place where you can ask for contact information if you've passed these five steps?
You are not.
You cannot ask for contact information from a woman.
I'm sorry.
I hate to be annoying.
You can't do it.
See, you're thinking about women like they're men.
So if a woman asks for your contact information, do you feel like you're in danger for giving it to her?
Right.
Because men generally don't get stalked, right?
So how do you stay in contact with the woman?
If you want to.
Yeah, you of course hide in her shower and say, yeah, I know it's midnight, but you know, I just couldn't stop thinking about you.
Yeah, you offer her your contact information, right?
And what I would do in my situation, I would simply get a piece of paper and say, listen, I don't want to ask for your number.
I think you're nice.
It'd be nice if we could meet up for a coffee or something like that.
But you know, you're a, you're a,
A lovely young woman in a big city.
I'm going to give you my contact information.
Love it if you contacted me.
Totally up to you.
Really appreciate the conversation.
Yeah, you give her your number.
She's in control.
You've got to have the woman be in control.
Women are nervous of strangers in a way that men generally can't understand.
Imagine going to a biker bar dressed in a tutu.
You'd feel a little nervous, right?
So you have to get into the mindset of women that you could be a dangerous person.
Especially if you're confident and positive, because a lot of men who are confident and positive are psychopaths, right?
So you have to put, you have to give her the control in the situation, right?
And then you can make a joke, right?
You can give her your number.
She can take the number and you can just stare at your phone and say, I'm waiting.
Nothing yet.
What's the matter with you?
Right.
And just say, yeah, listen, I really appreciate it.
It was a great chat.
Love to do it again.
You're in control.
You have the driver's seat.
Now I pass the future of our lineage onto you, right?
So you have to understand that women are nervous, right?
And also I would recommend leaving first.
I would recommend leaving first.
A woman, come on, look, if you're really attracted to a woman, let's be honest, right?
Dudes here, right?
Sausage fest time, right?
If you are sitting, chatting with an attractive woman, and she gets up to leave, to walk away, what does she absolutely know you're looking at?
What does she absolutely know you're looking at?
That's right.
King Caboose.
Right.
Yeah.
You are, you are looking at her butt.
You were looking at her body.
Look.
Ladies and gentlemen, it is with great regret that I wish to inform you that... men.
You are!
So she's going to feel very self-conscious about that, and you know, maybe she enjoys wiggling her butt or something like that, but I would generally... Do you have some fries to go with that shake?
Yeah, yeah, two tangerines in a stocking, right?
So, it might be nice and that way you can say, you can get up and you can say, normally I'd be watching your ass when you left, but this chance you get to watch my man buns as I generally stroll away.
And then you just walk out with this exaggerated drag queen stomp, right?
So yeah, it might be wise to, to leave before she does.
And you know, now you get to watch me, uh, you get to watch me leave her.
Right.
Uh, so yeah, I think that you want to be a positive and pleasant memory.
She'll think about it and give her the chance to evaluate.
Right.
Cause you, you already know that you're attracted to her because you've been watching her for five or 10 minutes before you approach her.
Don't rush her into figuring out whether she's attracted to you.
Right.
Right?
Don't rush her.
If you rush her, she'll say no.
Women are equally guilty of checking out a man's backside.
Yes, the difference is we don't feel threatened by it.
In fact, we feel complimented by it, right?
Yes, of course women check out men's butts.
I get that.
I used to work on the same floor as a jeans store, and all the pictures of men's butts made me half gay.
So, yeah, leaving first, it might seem less needy or whatever, but basically it's giving her the safety.
The other thing, of course, again, women can feel nervous in a big city, and if she leaves first, she's concerned that you might follow her or something.
Again, I'm not... So, I would say generally it's a good idea to leave first.
And then, you know, please don't play games, right?
Please don't play games.
Don't sit there like there's all this nonsense about, well, you can't text back right away because then you seem to... No, no, no.
If you like the woman, like the woman.
Well, I can't reply right back, right?
So if she texts you an hour later, you say, oh man, finally I can move my neck.
I've just been standing here staring at my screen.
I'm kidding.
Outside your window.
I did follow you.
Hey, did you find the GPS tracker in your computer bag?
So yeah, just text her back and say, great to hear from you.
I'm happy you messaged.
What's going on?
Something like that.
You've got to leave first to get the van ready.
Women have grabbed my ass.
Wow, you must have quite the bulbous man-buns there.
Good for you.
Good for you.
Van down by the river, glutes of steel, on a steady diet of government cheese.
But yeah, all you're doing is you're trying to figure out if there's any compatibility.
Which means you're trying to figure out if she, if her initial, your initial attraction to her is borne out by her personality, right?
Now you can see a lot of personality, eyes are the windows of the soul.
You can see a lot of the personality in, in the woman's body language, her posture, her smile, her laugh.
But you know, again, I mean, the guy's right.
It can be faked.
So you're trying to find out if your initial attraction is bearing out in her personality, right?
My business card is a GPS tracker.
That's right.
And that's just glute positioning system, not even geographical.
So yeah, you want to be in the position of attraction and evaluation.
Attraction is complementary to the woman.
Evaluating means that you're not desperate and will take anything with a pulse, right?
The moment the woman senses that you are just desperate for a girlfriend, she will reject you.
Any woman of quality.
The moment that you're just like, well, you have cleavage and a pulse, I'm down.
Yeah, that's not, like, come on.
I mean, you wouldn't want that.
You have to be both very attracted in order to make it worthwhile, and then you have to be evaluating.
And all you're doing is, do I like her?
Not, oh my God, can I get a girlfriend?
Or this could be the end of my line if I don't close this deal.
Do I like her?
Does she like me?
Is there compatibility?
That's all you're looking for.
Is there compatibility?
It's like somebody saying when you go for a job interview.
Do you like the boss?
Do you like the company?
Do you like the environment?
Can you get together on salary?
Do you like her?
Does she like you?
That's all you're asking.
And listen, most people you won't like or they won't like you to whatever, right?
Most people, you'll go and chat with them, doesn't work out, maybe she's, you know, she could be having, she could have a boyfriend, she could be married, she could not be interested in relationships, she could be gay, she could, any number of things, right?
Totally fine.
Totally fine.
All you're doing is seeing if there's a fit.
Is there a fit?
Is there a fit?
Is there a fit?
Now that's, you understand, if it's, can I get this girl's number, that's high stakes, and it's way too high stakes.
It's exploratory, not predatory, right?
You're scouting, you're not conquering.
So, can I get the girl's number?
It's this girl or no one.
I've gotta get her number.
I've gotta get her to like me.
That's all nonsense, and it's highly insulting to both you and her.
To evaluate is to be in a position of value, right?
If you don't evaluate, you don't have value.
Desperation is saying, I don't have any value, I've got nothing to offer, please date me out of pity.
You couldn't be any more anti-hypergamous if you tried, right?
Right, like if you're just desperate for any job, you're not valuable to your employer.
Brad Pitt doesn't say, I'll work for free, I need to eat, right?
Start to think I should wear a suit everywhere to balance the carrying $10,000 in beauty experience most women have.
Sure.
Sure.
You could do that.
You could do that.
Be well-groomed.
Have nice stuff.
Absolutely.
Be well-groomed, have nice stuff, right?
Have a nice haircut.
Don't let the hair on the back of your neck grow too long.
Trim your beard if you have one.
Shave nicely if you don't.
Use some face cream.
Make sure your teeth are relatively, you know, get your teeth cleaned and whitened if you can do that safely.
And, you know, all of that.
Have nice glasses if you wear glasses.
Just have nice stuff.
Yeah, fitted clothing if you're in shape.
Yeah, have nice clothing and all of that and... Yeah, don't wear Crocs.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, these things are very important, right?
In the same way that you're much less likely to approach a woman if she's in sweatpants or something like that.
God, what was it I remember seeing many years ago in Florida?
There were pants and on the back was written, wet.
Or no, on the back was written juicy, which you've seen a lot.
On the back of the sweatpants was written, lick me.
And I was just like, oh God!
Ugh.
Tastes like chlamydia.
Yeah, it's gross, right?
Yes.
That is correct.
Do not... See, when she meets you, part of her thinks of introducing you to her dad.
And it's like...
Hey man, this is my boyfriend who really likes Slayer.
No, that's not a thing to do.
That's not a good thing.
That's not a plus.
That's not a plus.
Be evaluative.
You're thinking of maybe spending the rest of your life with someone, you've got to be skeptical of their value, right?
Honor your desire, your attraction to that person, absolutely.
But then be in friendly, positive evaluation mode.
Do we fit?
All right.
I watched him live in 92, man.
For those with oily Polish skin like me, may I recommend ErnestSuppliers.com Matte Moisturizer.
Yeah, look, my wife got me into good moisturizers and, you know, I'm almost 57 and I don't really have wrinkles too many and until I smile, right?
Then I got some crow's feet.
But yeah, I mean, just look, look good.
Somebody's thinking of setting up a dating website for free to my listeners.
Yeah, I'm fine with me.
Banned t-shirts, sweatpants, sneakers.
I see you don't have a personality.
So here's the thing, right?
Do you know what one of the biggest temptations and dangers, this is my last point on this topic and if
Listen, guys, I mean, there's a lot of you here.
Tell me what I'm saying is not super valuable, right?
Apple or Android?
I have both.
Tell me what I'm saying is not super valuable to you, right?
This could be the difference between love and not love.
Children and not children?
Throw a couple of coins.
I mean, this is hard work, right?
This is hard work, and it's great information, right?
And not only is it great for me, but it's great for other people who listen to it.
You get more kids, more peaceful parenting, and all that kind of stuff.
A donation or two.
I know when I'm adding great value.
And it's not necessarily in my rendition of the Star Spangled Banner, but I think in this one, it's worth a tip.
And if you're listening on iOS, you can tip directly from the app.
If you're listening to this later, freedomain.com forward slash donate.
But yeah, a Tinder premium account is like 30 bucks a month, y'all.
And Lord knows how many single moms hiding their kids under laundry.
Can you stand looking at a month, right?
So, why does your Subscribestar only go to $2.50 a month?
It's only $3k a year.
Hey man, if you want me to up that, that's Subscribestar.com slash free domain.
If you want me to up that, I will absolutely make a note.
I will absolutely make a note.
Up Subscribestar.
Right.
Okay.
No more lonely nights, never be another.
Okay.
Are you ready for what you absolutely have to avoid evincing in women?
It's their greatest temptation and their greatest fear.
There was an entire book written about this in the 80s, I think.
Once the government lets me have a bank account, I will be tipping.
Oh, thank you, Mr. Farage.
It's a rough story, man.
Are you ready?
Have you ever heard of the Peter Pan Syndrome?
Do you know what the Peter Pan Syndrome is?
There's a whole book about this.
So a guy who shows up
In a band shirt and whatever, right?
He is very attractive to a woman because he has her, to some degree, avoid the responsibility of growing up because he's avoiding the responsibility of growing up.
And the desire or the thirst to drag your teenage years out into your 20s and 30s is a great temptation for women.
Perpetual adolescence, failure to launch, failure to land, whatever you want, however you want to put it.
So what you want to do is you want to say to, you have to signal to the woman your past adolescence.
You had fun as a teenager.
You're now in the responsible world of adulthood.
Musical taste is a great opening for conversation.
Sure.
Yeah.
I mean, musical taste is a great opening for conversation.
Yes, for sure.
Nothing wrong with that.
Tinkerbell symbolizes porn?
Is that right?
Boy, I don't know what searches you've been doing, but... No, so, the woman... Like, an insecure woman is the great temptation for a man, right?
So an insecure woman who's not doing that well in life is a great temptation for a man because you get to rescue her, you rush in and save her, you feel like an alpha relative to her level of lack of success or whatever.
So...
You really, really have to be careful.
Avoid women who aren't successful.
And successful doesn't mean that they're a CEO or a lawyer or anything like that, but just avoid women who aren't content, happy and successful.
Avoid women with large amounts of debt.
Avoid women with tattoos that are visible.
Avoid women with excessive makeup.
Avoid women with weirdly dyed hair.
Avoid women overtly displaying their sexuality because they're trying to get you to lose your mind, lose your reasoning, so that you avoid seeing the hellscape of their personality.
So yeah, nose piercings.
Yeah, to some degree nose piercings are just the metal detector for dysfunctional men, right?
I know a guy who was banned t-shirts on all the time.
He dated a single mother who he let stay with him and she screwed him by not paying rent, squatting and set him up with a restraining order.
Guy's trying to get her evicted to keep his apartment.
Right.
What does it tell you when a woman is fat?
Almost always it tells me that she was sexually abused as a child.
For that I have massive sympathy.
Massive sympathy.
But you understand that with single motherhood comes increased sexual exploitation and molestation of children, which leads to increased obesity, right?
Because obesity is a way of avoiding sexual contact.
It's a way of shielding yourself from sexuality because sexuality was used to harm you as a child, right?
Feminist college girls avoid?
You know, it depends if they're just kind of going along to get along, whether they're really committed to the beliefs or not.
If she has a doodle, don't let her touch your noodle.
It's a confident man who can refer to his man meat as a noodle.
If in her nose there is a hole, don't let her touch your ball.
Environmentalists?
See, here's the thing.
If the woman's maternal instinct has been warped into environmentalism, then it's a way of protecting her maternal instinct.
If she's an antinatalist, then it's been completely corrupted, right?
So all you have to do is just steer her away from the environmentalism, and then she can use her desire to nurture and protect to raise your kids, rather than protect the planet from imaginary plant food death, right?
What about a career-driven woman?
Well, that depends.
That depends.
If she's a career-driven woman, if you want to have kids, a career-driven woman is not going to work.
Why do women think they're better than men?
Well, because women have not been taught their strengths.
Women have been taught to compete with men in the areas where men are the strongest.
They've been taught to compete with men in STEM, in physical strength, in kicking butts, in all of this kind of stuff, in sleeping around.
So women have been taught to compete with men in the areas where men are strongest.
And therefore, women feel like they've been lessened, deep down.
Now, because they've been lessened, they need to be propped up, which is why they're so susceptible to vanity and endless praise and so on, right?
Does that make sense?
Hit me with a why.
I don't want to over-explain it, but just hit me with a why.
Yeah, that makes sense, right?
So, a lot of women, the propaganda, it doesn't go all the way to the soul, it's just kind of on the surface, it's on the skin-deep stuff, and, you know, she's looking to be broken free.
And remember, look, there was a time when I was propagandized, there was a time when you were propagandized, and we didn't know any better.
Right?
Just have the humility of recognizing that you're lucky and I'm lucky, and that we happen to get the right information at the right time, it hit us the right way, and broke us out of the matrix.
So, yeah, I hate the endless praise, sure, yeah.
If women are taught
Well, first of all, men and women shouldn't be competing with each other at all.
We are complementary, we're not competitive.
And it's kind of, you know, I remember reading a book, The Undercover Economist, many years ago.
It's a good book.
And in The Undercover Economist, there's this analogy, or this conversation, right, where people say,
Oh, you know, renting is way better than buying a house.
Because, you know, when you rent a house, you've got all this extra money, blah, blah, blah.
Or they say, well, buying a house is way better than renting, because renting, you're just throwing your money away.
And you've got a house, you've got an asset, and blah, blah, blah.
It's like, it's so boring.
Because all people do is they take all the strengths of renting and compare it to all the weaknesses of buying.
Or they take all the weaknesses of buying and compare it to all the strengths.
Ah, it's so boring.
It's just boring.
And it's just an attempt to take away your free will.
So you say, which is better, a man or a woman?
Well, let's go with upper body strength, but clearly men are superior.
Well, let's go with patience and nurturing, but clearly women are better.
Right?
Let's go with whatever.
So it's just we're designed to complement each other, not to compete with each other.
And getting us to compete with each other is a great way of depopulating and all of this sort of stuff.
So yeah, you know, you can absolutely love women.
It doesn't take away anything from being a man.
You should.
But if what you do is you compare women to men and you say, well, women have it easy relative to men.
It's like, but that's just, you're comparing the fact that women have more power when they're younger and that power would corrupt you and it would corrupt me.
This is a weird idea that men have.
The power only corrupts other people.
I mean, everybody has this in politics.
Well, power only corrupts other people.
My group can handle power, right?
And men look at women as like, oh, they've got way too much sexual market value and power when they're younger.
It's like, well, you'd be the same if you had all of that, right?
So.
Complementing women.
Complementing their beauty seems superficial because they might not have that much to do with it.
Straight teeth, body type.
But what about eyes and smile that are more behavioral?
I don't know what you mean by complimenting women.
Are you just going around complimenting women as a whole?
I don't understand that.
I just hate when women use you for attention and ego boosting.
Why do you hate it when women use you for attention and ego boosting?
I don't understand why would you hate that?
If a woman says to you, I'm a narcissist, would you hate her for that?
I mean, isn't that a huge relief?
Isn't that a huge positive?
Aren't you just released from having to pursue something that could be utterly self-destructive?
I mean, if you're on a date with a woman, right?
You're on a date with a woman, and she says, oh yeah, by the way, I'm a serial killer, and I'm looking forward to turning you inside out with a giant forklift truck, would you sit there and say, oh, I hate that she told me that?
You'd be like, no, I'm gonna call the cops.
Go to the bathroom, call the cops, or whatever, right?
If a woman says to you, I can't wait to date a man, and marry a man, and then take him to the cleaners, rip off half his money, and take his children away from him, would you be mad at her for telling you that?
Or would you be like, whew!
Also beware of women you lust after because they're like your crazy mom.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Um, okay.
Let me just give you the last tip, right?
So this is my last tip for dating.
This is like whether the woman is worthy of, of pursuing a relationship, right?
So you've talked to her, you've given her your contact information.
She's contacted you in some manner, right?
Are you ready for whether she's dateable?
There's only one thing that determines whether she's dateable or not.
Only one thing.
And if this doesn't get a donation, I'm just hanging up.
Are you ready?
The one thing that tells you whether she's dateable or not.
Yes, please.
Empathy.
No, you already established empathy with the curiosity thing.
That was number two.
Number three, sorry.
Are you ready?
Does she want children?
No.
You might change your mind about that.
Laughs at my jokes?
Nope.
Okay, you ready?
So, politics?
No.
No.
The only way that someone can be dateable is if they are willing to submit to some external standard.
Are they willing to submit to some external standard, just as you are?
Right?
Is she willing to submit to some external standard?
Reason and evidence.
Because a narcissist will never let anything interfere with her will.
Her will is her physics.
Her will is her triumph.
Her will is her God.
She worships herself and her whims.
Right?
Is she willing to submit to any external standard?
If she's not willing to submit to any external standard, you can date her, but you'll be doomed.
You can date her, of course.
You can do whatever you want.
I'm just saying you're absolutely doomed.
How do you test for that?
Well, in your conversation, at any point, there's going to be some difference, right?
There's going to be some difference about something.
Somebody says, oh somebody's posted me this.
He said, if you want to see eye-to-eye then you should use reason and evidence.
I don't think I'm right because I said so.
I think I'm right if my claims line up with reality.
Based on what you've said here, you think you're right because you said so and anyone who disagrees is being off-putting in some way.
Using reason and evidence is the only way anyone can see eye-to-eye unless they're being dishonest or an occult.
And the woman says, I don't agree and I'm pretty much through with this.
You don't agree the reason and evidence is how you determine if a position is correct or not?
No!
Oh.
Okay.
Then could you tell me what the alternative is?
Being myself and following myself?
You understand I'm talking about in general, not just within our relationship, right?
Yeah, I trust in myself and what I know.
I don't need anything extra.
Yeah.
So that's a straight up, in my view, straight up selfish person.
And they're very openly saying, right.
So, you know, maybe she talks a little bit about, I don't know, some sort of mysticism or maybe a bit of astrology or something like that.
I saw this exchange, a very terse exchange between a son and his mother.
And the son is saying, mom, what, what was the hour?
What hour was I actually born?
And the mom's like, stay away from her.
So you'll have some difference.
Some difference of opinion, some difference of perspective.
And you could say, you know, I don't quite agree because of this.
And if she's like, well, you know, then we'll just have to agree to disagree.
If there's nothing she'll do to mediate.
She's not curious about, well, tell me your reason, tell me your evidence, tell me your arguments, right?
I'm a Pisces!
Something fishy about that, right?
So, yeah, you, you, you, whenever the first, and this, maybe it's on the first date, maybe it's on the second, but at some point you're going to have some, she's going to say something you disagree with, you're going to say something she disagrees with.
And if she has better arguments, do you submit to her?
If she has a better perspective, do you submit to her?
If you have reason and evidence, does she... doesn't immediately agree with you, but is she willing to submit to something other than her own ego?
And if she's not, RUN!
If she's not, you gotta run.
Right?
If you say something surprising to her, something unusual, something blah blah blah, right?
Like, I don't know, maybe the topic of Trump comes up and she says, well, I wasn't a big fan of Trump.
And you could say, I don't know, yeah, I mean, I mean, the man had his flaws for sure, but wasn't it kind of nice to not have any wars for a couple of years?
Now, if she says, oh, there were wars, or it doesn't matter, or, you know, then okay, then that's a pretty good piece of evidence, right?
And yeah, it was kind of nice to not have any wars in America for a couple of years, right?
Now, and if she says, wow, you know what, that's, yeah, I mean, obviously, that's, we can't argue that, that's interesting, right?
Now, she hasn't agreed with you, but she's just, okay, that's something, right?
Yeah, war in France right now.
Yeah, well, not much of a war.
Somebody says, I was chatting up some women in the blood donor bus at church and they started talking about horoscopes, lol.
Well, I mean, horoscopes are sinful in the church, right?
Because they're kind of demonic, right?
They are like Ouija boards.
Like, this is messing with demonology.
Horoscopes, right?
And horoscopes are a short, slippery slope to mental illness, in my view.
I've never met any woman who's into horoscopes who isn't equally nuts.
They are very dangerous.
It's a slippery slope, right?
And if somebody starts talking about horoscopes, you can say, you know, I think there's some interesting stuff about horoscopes.
And there is.
There are some patterns about when people are born, particularly in cold climates, and those patterns are pretty simple, right?
So if you're born in the fall, as I was, your first experience of life is in the winter.
And so you're internal, you're indoors, there are more people around, there's more conversation.
Whereas if you're born in the spring, your first experience of life is the summer, you're outdoors, you're, you know, big spaces, big vistas, big skies, and all this kind of stuff.
So yeah, there's some interesting things about horoscopes, right?
But the idea that the motions of distant suns affect our personality, obviously that's not true, right?
There's no proof or anything to do with that, right?
So, yeah.
Now, she just may never have thought of that, right?
She may never have thought of that.
In which case, she'd be like, oh, you know what, that's interesting.
And say, OK, tell me the physics by which a distant star could affect your personality.
I don't quite follow that.
Right.
I mean, they're in, you know, 300 light years away.
Uh, there's no gravitational stuff.
There's no electromagnetism.
There's no radiation.
There's like nothing that could really affect your personality.
Like I don't quite understand the mechanics.
Right.
And she's like, you know what?
I don't, I don't really understand those mechanics either.
I mean, you know, if she's curious, right.
So yeah, you, this is, is she datable?
Will she submit to an external standard?
Or can she doubt her own perspectives?
Can she doubt her own opinions?
Because if you can't do that, you can't ever grow.
You can't ever know anything.
And then in any disagreement, you'll always be wrong.
She'll always be right until you want to throw yourself off a bus, right?
So yeah, can you have productive disagreements?
Can you be curious?
If she says something you disagree with, right?
Like if she says, you know, Trump is terrible, right?
It's like, oh, tell me more about that.
Where does that come from?
Or whatever it is, right?
So yeah, basing decisions off astrology is forsaking free will.
Yes, and now you have the universe to blame for your own terrible mistakes.
And I believe in astrology is inversely related to intelligence in general.
So it's just a marker saying I'm not
I'm not really capable of having a rational discussion, but I have tits.
All right.
That was actually my original tagline for Freedomain Radio.
All right, my friends, we've had a nice long old juicy chat.
Come on, come on.
Feed me.
Feed me.
Donate.
Tip.
I've changed your life.
It's very helpful.
Hard won decades of research in the realm of males and females.
Do you have arguments about politics with your wife?
We don't have arguments.
We have discussions.
We have different views and perspectives.
We don't have arguments.
What's to argue about?
You just, you reason it out, right?
Look for evidence.
Man, it's hot in here.
Happy 4th!
Thank you, Dan.
I appreciate the tip.
Anybody else?
Anybody else?
You going out to do some fireworks if you're in the States tonight?
You going out to hang out with friends, family, whoever?
Gonna have some fun?
I do love that video in California when they banned fireworks and it's just like, it's a video of over, over LA, just everyone letting off fireworks.
It was beautiful.
It was beautiful.
Might as well celebrate, could be our last.
Yeah, just out of curiosity, hit me with a why if you think there'll be an election in the US next year.
Interesting, interesting.
All right.
Well, thank you very much, everyone.
It looks like we have hit the bottom of the well as far as donations go and tips.
I appreciate that.
Thank you so much for listening and watching and subscribing.
You can, of course... Oh, you know what?
I'm going to give this to you.
Even though you're not all donors, go to that website and you can check out my AI.
It's really, really cool.
It's very interesting stuff and people have got some great questions in there so I hope that you will check it out.
Just remember to ask me about things that I've written about, not like things I've never talked about because the AI won't have anything to do with that.
Happy 4th of July in Canada?
Sure!
Why not?
Absolutely.
Why not?
Yes, so freedomand.com forward slash donate, and I'm going to publish right after this.
Izzy and I went to go and see Indiana Jones, the deodorant soap of destiny, sorry, the dial of destiny.
And it's a 7 out of 10.
It's not bad.
It's not not woke, not particularly bad.
The lead female drove my daughter completely mental over the course of the evening.
It was a battle between horror and insanity.
So she has some pretty funny things to say about all of that.
Thank you from Norway.
Thank you for everyone from listening.
Thank you for supporting.
If you're listening to this later, freedomain.com forward slash donate and I hope that you will help support the show.
Philosophy needs you, I need you, and I really appreciate your help.
