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June 27, 2020 - Freedomain Radio - Stefan Molyneux
07:31
IZZY FOUND A TURTLE!!!!
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Time Text
That's enough philosophy for us.
Yeah, so now, earlier today we live-streamed our tadpileptic, everybody was doing well, and then the sandstone ate a toad.
Uh, sorry, a toad. Uh, I meant to say a caterpillar.
And now, so we just went on a little bike ride, right?
Yeah. Uh, we went into a tiny little dead-end neighborhood.
Uh, and there's a pond here.
We've, um... Me and my mom had seen a turtle before, and this guy is the cutest thing.
So we were today, a few days ago, we found a turtle, he just ran into the pond.
Huge turtle, a snapping turtle, right?
Yeah. But now we were just leaving the area, nothing interesting was there.
And we were going up, and my parents went up, and then I'm like, oh my god!
Guys, there's a turtle here.
I don't believe you. I think he's stuck.
Like, look at that. That looks like where he's falling down.
It looks like he's dug with his hind legs.
Like, you know how you get stuck in mud as a car or something?
So I think he's stuck here in the sand.
I think so. So we're going to take him and we're going to put him elsewhere.
Do you want to see if he wants to eat any food?
We don't have any. No, look, a little finger or...
No, no, try... He might eat a leaf or something.
Uh, I'm not sure.
Let me give this guy a try.
We'll obviously look up what they feed him.
Maybe we can keep him for a tiny bit.
Like maybe, I don't know, a day or an hour or something.
Let's see. Very cool.
See if he'll eat anything. Nah, he's scared.
Yeah, he is nervous, right? He doesn't trust us at all.
So I think he tried to climb this embankment and I think he got stuck.
Well, that's what this looks like, but he's very cute.
He has algae growing on his shell.
Hey, who doesn't? Yeah.
But, like, we've seen these turtles before.
The red stripes on their hands, that's what makes me remember him.
Yeah, yeah. And he has some red stripes.
He's so cute. Oh, very cool.
He's definitely not a snapping turtle, which is cool.
And don't worry, we'll sanitize.
Yeah, we will sanitize.
We're not touching our faces or anything.
The most I'm doing to brush the annoying hair out of my face is just, like, my shoulder.
Oh, tell me about it. What?
I'm just kidding. I'm like, I'm sorry.
Now, Izzy, I can't, because I have my glasses on.
What are people saying? They're telling us what kind of turtle it is.
They're telling us it's dangerous. She can mark it and put her name on it with nail polish.
Did that when I was little. Might be laying eggs.
Turtle virus. Red-eared slider.
Wait. Slider.
Oh, red-eared slider.
Slider is a kind of small hamburger.
I'm sure she doesn't mean that. Wait.
Turtles in half-shell turtle power.
Okay, I have no idea. Give him some pets.
Some pets? Yeah.
I think pet him? I don't know.
I'm just going to... That is very cool, though.
He's kind of... He's small, though.
I don't think he's very old. I think this...
I don't know. I've heard that...
I... The one we see...
Saw... I was, like, four?
I'm 11 now, but I was, like, four, I think, when we last saw him.
Maybe four or five. And, um...
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, and they see he seemed a little bit bigger than this, so maybe this is near full size.
I saw that, wasn't it? You know what, he's vamping for the live stream.
Work it, friend, work it.
I see you. Oh, he's so cute.
That is really cool. Now, I don't think...
Can you just have a quick poke in the dirt there very gently?
Yeah. I don't think he's laying...
I think he's too little to lay eggs.
Or she, I guess it would be she, right?
I don't know. It seems like there's a hole there, and I know they kind of lay their eggs in a hole.
Yeah? I've heard...
That is very interesting. I'm not sure.
Let's leave her there for the next little bit.
Yeah, yeah. I'm just gonna, you know, kind of sit here looking at her.
But I don't know why she would lay her eggs here and not in the bushes.
Now Izzy, here's what we need to do.
Yeah? Here's what we need to do.
And maybe you can do this for me or I can do it.
Oh gosh. So if this was a nature documentary and they were telling you all about the beauty of animals, what would be the next thing they would say?
And then humans came along and killed them all.
That's right. And global warming is killing all of their habitats and you must feel guilty and give up all of your freedoms and property rights and money and everything.
Look, we like those documentaries, but the global warming part just gets so like, oh my gosh.
That's right. Do you like these polar bear cubs?
Well, you're killing them with your car.
Since you were born, it's been like a...
What's it called? Plus 20% more polar bears in the U.S. area.
Polar bears are doing well.
Just to make it look like a real nature documentary, we have to put in that...
We've got to put in that shiv of guilt in the side for free market capitalism.
It's killing all of their inhabitants.
Anyway, just look at that camouflage too, eh?
That's why I didn't see him.
Not because of my older eyes or anything, but because of the camouflage.
Oh yeah, I did. Oh yeah, so I was literally thinking right when we were at that pond.
Oh, did I just see something? I think it may have been a bird.
I'll be right back one second. Well, I guess I'll continue the show on my own.
I don't know if that showed up.
Yeah, so basically what happened was, what's it called?
I promise I was going to say something.
Oh yeah, I was just thinking, oh, I wish we could see a turtle today.
I mean, like, I've seen, yeah, the day we actually, we came, there was a turtle sitting on the road.
Yep. And then a turtle at the pond.
So that's two big turtles in one day.
But that's the day that I was talking about at the beginning of this live stream.
So I was just thinking now, I'm like, oh, we should see a turtle again here.
I mean, it'd be the perfect spot.
It even has that type of algae that we typically see on turtles if they've just come out of the water.
Right. It's kind of like weird kind of plant water clovers.
It's not exactly algae, but Anyways, then I'm like, oh my gosh, there's actually a turtle.
I was just thinking about one and we got a turtle.
Honestly, if I think there's going to be a bird that's about to poop on someone, it's a bird that's about to poop on someone.
I'm kidding. I tell you, that was actually a historic moment in the history of the internet because that was the first time a molyneux has ever lost a train of thought in a live stream or a show of any kind.
Yeah. Just first time ever.
No, what I mean by that is like the reason I was just thinking, oh, I wish we could see a turtle.
We're probably going to see one soon.
Yeah. Right? And then I'm like, oh, wow, we just saw one right after I was thinking we should see a turtle soon.
Yeah, yeah. So that was what I meant about like if I think a bird is about to poop on someone, the bird is about to poop on someone.
Yeah, don't ever say that. Yeah.
Now, this is interesting too.
So we, in our backyard, as I say, a couple of years ago, we, there were two turtles.
There was one of these dudes. Yeah.
And then there was a snapping turtle.
I saw them It was huge and gray and it barely had any of these patterns right here.
Now, first of all, this is how you know that turtles like jigsaw puzzles, number one.
Number two, that snapping turtle, I was picking it up to move it because it was kind of tangled.
And I picked it up from the side and the head came out like a tentacle.
Out like something out of an alien, like something would come out of someone's chest on a spaceship and kind of whipped around to the side and almost bit me.
So I just want to tell people, if you're thinking of touching a snapping turtle that's big, do not do it because their heads go on forever.
Last year we had two.
One of them was a About the size, a little bit smaller.
Yeah. And then another one was way smaller, like half of this, like that down.
And they were both snapping turtles.
They never bit anyone. In fact, they were very tame with me.
Like, I mean, they would just kind of sit around, you know, and let me pick them up.
But that's because they were little.
Now, if there was a snapping turtle that was, say, this big, I don't even think you can see my hands, say double that thing, those things will probably bite you.
So, yeah. And they are very, very snappy.
Yes, they are. All right.
Any other comments that we need to take care of?
We'll let people get on with their day.
I just thought this was too cool not to share.
Yes. I'm just reading the comments.
People should type a whole lot that's blurry. That's so rude.
Someone said it looks like a watermelon.
It does, but we're not going to put elastic bands around it until it explodes because that would be horrible.
That would be rich. Anything else important?
Safety stuff. Anybody know what it is? Philosophy soon?
No, you don't get philosophy.
Hang on. We're going to do a live stream in about 45 minutes.
I'm doing a live stream on the state of the world.
Oh gosh, that's soon. Okay, well, I'm going to make...
I'm going to make a nice habitat for this guy right here, and then I'm going to release him, like, very soon.
And I'm going to give him food. We actually have turtle food from last year, so...
Excellent. Turtle food.
We're not going to use the turtle for food.
We're going to feed him turtle food. No, yes.
All right. Bye, everyone!
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