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July 13, 2019 - Freedomain Radio - Stefan Molyneux

07:02

Dear Liberal Hypocrites

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	Hello everybody, Stefan Molyneux from Freedomain Radio.
	Hope you're doing well.
	Herein, we have a list of liberal hypocrisies.
	Liberals argue that Christians are intolerable bigots, but people from other religions, say perhaps where there's a fair amount of sand and beheadings, just aren't.
	When white men don't rape, it's evidence of white rape culture, you see.
	When immigrants rape, what?
	What?
	That doesn't happen?
	What are you talking about?
	Why are we talking about theoretical things that don't happen?
	You might as well talk about Klingon molestation.
	Actually, would you mind talking about Klingon molestation?
	It's kind of hot.
	Racist!
	Why would we be talking about unicorns, things that don't exist, things that have no relevance, and SHINY!
	SHINY!
	SHINY!
	Liberals argue that the police are brutal and racist and corrupt pigs, yet we should concentrate all the guns in the hands of the police and disarm the citizenry.
	You see, you don't need a gun because you can always just call the police.
	Hello?
	Hello?
	Yeah, there's an, uh, Unarmed person doing no harm in my neighborhood, could you guys come down and just pop him a few?
	Liberals believe that guns in the hands of private individuals are evil, but guns under the control of politicians, and only politicians, are somehow virtuous.
	Okay, so the way it works is you hate guns, but you need guns for the police to have them in order to take guns from the people, because guns are bad unless the police have them, in which case guns are great.
	Spin the barrel and play Russian roulette with liberal arguments to your brain.
	Liberals claim that they hate the 1%, you know, the super rich.
	Well, almost all liberals are actually in the 1% on a global scale.
	They are in the top middle class and above people in the world.
	You are in the top 1%.
	Oh, also, liberals say that the 1% use the power of the state to get stuff for free.
	Meanwhile, most liberals want to vote for Bernie Sanders or Hillary Clinton.
	In order to get something for free.
	College debt, tuition forgiveness, free college tuition, free other stuff.
	You see, because the 1% use political power to get stuff for themselves for free at the expense of everyone else.
	Look in the mirror, liberals!
	You are the 1%, you're doing exactly the same thing.
	Ain't it a bitch when you think you're taking someone else down, turns out you're just banging your own head against a mirror.
	Ooh, I hate that.
	Ugh, it still hurts less than actually thinking.
	I want college for free!
	Statistics are hard.
	I'd rather have a tantrum.
	Liberals argue that women are equal to men, yet they need massive government programs to compete with men.
	Also, see blacks.
	Liberals believe that television commercials program your children.
	I really, really want to procreate with SpongeBob SquarePants.
	Twelve years of relentless government indoctrination in public schools?
	That's just an education!
	I gotta tell ya, I want to have sex with SpongeBob SquarePants.
	Oh, sponge!
	Did you use the sponge?
	I'm not alone in that, right?
	Tradition, you see, according to liberals, is stifling and counterproductive and doesn't let you get your groove on.
	But government teachers should have summers off because approximately a thousand years ago, children were needed on farms.
	Well, let's keep that tradition alive because it helps us get votes.
	Liberals hate and fear big corporations, yet spend the majority of their lives in Starbucks complaining on Facebook.
	See, there's this really cute girl behind the counter and I'm hoping to liberate her from her oppression.
	Well, you know, you see, we've got a lot of liberal bias here and I just feel like we're getting kind of one-sided.
	Liberals believe that diversity is a great strength.
	But have you ever imagined or heard the following speech?
	Well, you know, you see, we've got a lot of liberal bias here, and I just feel like we're getting kind of one sided.
	Let's actively go out and recruit a bunch of conservatives.
	You know, let's go talk to Tom Sowell or other people who are going to give us kind of a different perspective on this, because I just kind of feel we're in a bit of an echo chamber here at the moment.
	We've got to go branch out, get some more people, get some different people.
	Oh my god, I thought this was going to be a tea party with Quantum Crisp.
	It turns out that there are some patriots here.
	Quick, make me a brown paper bag out of the New York Times.
	I've got to suck in some liberal ju-ju-ju-juice.
	See, liberals genuinely expect hundreds of millions of European Christians to get along with millions of Muslims a lot more easily than any liberal can ever get along with a Republican or a Conservative.
	Yeah, but you see, the problem is it's really tough for me as a liberal to compete with a Republican or a Conservative, you see, because Conservatives are stronger because they've been swimming against the general current of the media and academia in their society.
	Can you imagine, like a Republican who's graduated with a PhD in a generally liberal universe of academia?
	He's going to be so strong, he's going to be really strong.
	I'm sorry, I'm not very good with metaphors.
	I do like to cry, though.
	How on earth are the poor going to get help?
	I know!
	Government guns, debt, fiat currency.
	That's going to work out beautifully.
	If a black Democrat tries to gain political power, he's breaking new ground and ripping down the prejudices of society.
	If you're a black conservative and you're trying to gain political power, well, you're just an appeasing Uncle Tom who's apologizing for slavery.
	When women are supported by unsustainable, coercive, and predatory government programs, that's evidence You know, he only did the dishes because he wants to have sex with you.
	Actually, ladies, that is true.
	When women are supported by the ones they love, well, that's evidence of a vicious patriarchy.
	You know, he only did the dishes because he wants to have sex with you.
	Actually, ladies, that is true.
	He did only do the dishes because he wants to have sex with you.
	Also, when he doesn't do the dishes, he wants to have sex with you.
	Also when there are no dishes, he wants to have sex with you.
	Also when you have a pulse, he wants to have sex with you.
	Or within a few minutes if you're not having a pulse.
	Liberals are anti-sexist but they talk about a patriarchy run by men, all men apparently, and that encompasses all of society.
	Hey man, you can't accuse us of bigotry because we're using the word structure and that's different.
	Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na.
	Strike one for crazy lefties!
	Remember, insults are the same as intellectual rigor.
	Racist.
	All Republican government programs are dismal failures, but all liberal programs are staggering successes.
	I mean, don't you get it, man?
	Like, like, like, like, like, like the war on drugs is just a complete mess and a failure, and it's never gonna work.
	But gun control is gonna totally work.
	Like, like, like, American foreign policies is an unmitigated disaster, man.
	Actually, that's true.
	But I think with just, say, 50 or 60 trillion more dollars, we could totally win the war on poverty.
	Liberals buy gay Guevara t-shirts from capitalist establishments like Hot Topic because nothing spells out your commitment to defending the rights of the proletariat like buying the blood-soaked, profit-leveled visage of a man who spent his time shooting the proletariat and their children.
	Actually, they seem to have died from lead poisoning.
	And I still think you're exploiting the worms who are feeding on your body.
	A woman's body is her property, but a man's wallet belongs to everyone.
	Trying to make my way against liberal headwind of irrationality.
	Can't!

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