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Feb. 22, 2023 - Stay Free - Russel Brand
01:14:40
Wait... Putin Says He'll Nuke! Why Is No One Reporting This?!! - #086 - Stay Free With Russell Brand
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Time Text
I'm going to go ahead and get started.
Brought to you by Fyjer.
In this video, you're going to see the future.
Hello, you Awakening Wonders!
Thanks for joining me on Stay Free with Russell Brand today.
Wherever you are, the whole show will be exclusively available only on Rumble because we can literally speak freely and we use that freedom of speech to bring people together for even deeper experience.
Click on that red button and join us on Locals.
That's where I read the comments from, like this one from Orion Rain.
Hello, hello, hello!
Hello there, darling.
We've got a fantastic show for you today.
Unless you're worried about dying in a nuclear apocalypse, in which case, we should probably turn off now.
Joe Biden, your president, if you're America, is in Poland right now, giving some weird, crazy, simplistic, reductive, Fisher-Price-style speech for morons out there, simplifying a very complex situation.
Putin has just suspended the only remaining nuclear arms treaty that they have with the US.
Well, I think if actually you are gonna have a nuclear war, like the treaty, might not be of that much value.
In our presentation, here's the news.
We'll be looking at Chinese balloons and the Ohio derailment.
What's the real threat to you in your life?
Let me know in the chat what you think.
And after 10 minutes, we skip over to being exclusively on Rumble today
to discuss new data on the effects of lockdown on children.
For a lot of you, it's going to be exactly what you expected, exactly what you discussed, but we can't discuss that kind of thing on YouTube because it's controversial, isn't it, on-screen assistant and producer Gareth?
We have to be careful.
It doesn't matter what new information comes about.
On YouTube, the rules don't change.
They don't change.
That's why there's a link in the description.
You can watch us on Rumble.
We'll speak freely there about the stories that matter to you and your life, and as well as presenting potential solutions and alternative systems.
That's why today's guest is author and anarchist Darren Allen.
I'm not writing this book.
I can't be bothered.
That's not what anarchy means.
Grow up!
Anarchy isn't nihilism, it's absolute democracy and a refusal to accept domination.
I can see new ways that libertarianism and anarchism could live side by side quite easily.
We'll be talking with our guest Darren about new systems and new systems seem to be necessary right now in order to prevent an apocalypse.
Maybe you're not bothered about an apocalypse.
I don't like them.
But first of all, let's discuss some important stories from around the world that will restore your faith in the system.
Restart Spain of decriminalised sex acts with animals.
So that's good news, isn't it?
Unless you're an animal who's hoping to not have sex with a person for some reason, in which case it's not legal, but decriminalised.
Usually you hear that around controlled substances, don't you?
It's not legal, but it's decriminalised.
I'm certainly not endorsing any controlled substance.
Why would I?
Neither am I endorsing sex with an animal in Spain.
Yeah.
Why is this happening?
What's happening right now that makes you think the solution to this problem is... Hmm, look at that tortoise.
I hope it's not a tourist thing.
Welcome to España!
Normally it's no, no.
Here it's we say si, si.
Viva España!
Surely not, surely not.
I don't want to be reductive or simplistic, but it is a story about allowing human beings to potentially have sex with animals.
Doesn't seem like progress.
Seems like literally an attempt to reverse evolution.
Oh no you don't!
We're not going to ascend to the realm of angels.
I just think it's an interesting response to, you know, potential nuclear Armageddon.
Is that maybe Spain is just going All bets are off.
We can all do what we want now.
Okay, bad news.
Putin has torn up the last remaining nuclear treaty.
Okay, but on the bright side, I have a very attractive pig.
Sorry for that accent.
It's a Spanish person, basically European like me.
Also, don't worry about a thing because there's this new singing robot mouth thing.
Who needs monkeys?
Why bother going down the zoo with some bolt cutters when you can simply acquire this singing mouth.
If it doesn't give you an eerie and terrified sensation, you may need to see a psychiatrist.
Let's have a look.
Well, I'm hard.
Norfolk Southern are lobbying.
You know, the dudes that spill all them chemicals all over Ohio, polluting the water around there.
They are... Look at this business.
Norfolk Southern has thrown roughly $100 million into politics since 1990.
They're valued at $55 billion.
They've spent nearly $80 million since 1998 on lobbying.
Since 1990, it's sent about $17 million directly to candidates' coffers, and it's given Let's focus on our main story now.
Your president and mine for America is a hegemonic globalist.
You know I love American people, but this kind of stuff, man.
Make it last guys!
Cause you're gonna need it.
Let's focus on our main story now.
Your president and mine for America is a hegemonic globalist
power. I know, you know I love American people, but this kind of stuff
man. Check him out.
Oh.
Surely the people of Ohio are not gonna
appreciate this music. Are they?
Because surely a lot of them are suffering.
They're looking at a lousy $5 bill thinking, how am I going to make this last?
I need a shower.
Not too keen on cancer or that weird vinyl sounding chemical they're splashing about over there, that little fish killer.
No, he's actually in Poland, mate, simplifying the war.
I remember when I was a lad, you didn't have anniversaries for wars.
Because they were considered terrible, terrible catastrophes rather than like, you know, not world cups for the military industrial complex.
Not pop concerts.
Not a pop concert.
This is a terrible event.
Also, Joe Biden isn't the sort of politician that can be showcased in this way.
You don't want to see Joe Biden coming up a runway over a period of time.
You don't need a long period of time to study his gait.
No.
If you look at how he walks for too long, the torso is too rattly, the hands ain't right.
If you were putting together a list of catwalk models, he wouldn't be top of the list, would he?
I don't know, I'd want Seal.
Right.
Because I feel like Seal would really stride down that.
If the president was Seal, even Zelensky, he would like troglodyte shuffle down there looking pleased with himself and khaki, wouldn't he?
With his jumper on, yep.
Yeah, like Odi or whatever.
How about those jumpers become old-fashionable?
Like people are wearing them.
Do you know what I mean?
Because he's a symbol now, isn't he?
Let us know in the chat in the comments if you've got one of them sort of car key hoodies and you're trying to bust that stuff and capitalise on Zelensky glamour.
You can join us on the locals chat.
You can click that button.
This is the chat that we have open here.
A lot of people love us.
Look at this person.
Stone Owen.
Actually, they're just talking to each other.
They're not even talking to us in there as bloody usual.
It's nice in there.
I think people are falling in love and all sorts of stuff.
Let's look at a little bit more old strutty Joe.
I've been looking for something you can give me a symbol.
Isn't even the right ambience, like looking up, you know, like, so we heard that there were like smoke machines there.
Sorry.
Which, you know, might be good to acclimatise you to the radioactive fog that you're soon going to be living within
if this Armageddon thing kicks off.
Alright, atmosphere, it's going on too long isn't it?
He's smiling isn't he, but internally I think he's thinking, why is this so bloody long?
Because you know Joe Biden, that is one area where he really struggles.
He's getting on and off stages without wandering.
In fact, that's probably what everyone's so pleased about, is that he didn't wander off into the crowd, he didn't turn off, he didn't sniff someone on the head.
He's done very well actually.
All of his better performances.
I would say top five.
So you may be terrified about the potential nuclear war that we're heading towards, but
in other news, Joe Biden can make it down a relatively long runway.
Putin did a comparable propaganda speech, much more what you would expect, slightly
more ascetic, stringent, austere, much more Russian, obedient crowd, not such a celebratory
tone.
Have a look.
Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin.
We'll do a version of the Grammys!
Make it like the Grammys!
Line it up!
This is what it would be like if they did put music over it, just in case you're...
🎵 Give me some more, more, more, more, more, more, more 🎵
🎵 Give me some more, more, more, more, more, more, more, more 🎵
🎵 I've been looking for something, baby 🎵 🎵 You give me some more 🎵
In spite of all the fanfare, Joe Biden did of course give a speech.
And what I'd like to draw your attention to is the simplistic language that's used in this speech.
Talk of heroes, villains, bravery.
Now I love archetypes, deep truths, trying to get to the essence of a story.
What aspect of human nature underwrites our current systems?
Is it greed?
Is it selfishness?
Lust is altruism and philanthropy.
But when you talk about complex geopolitical situations that definitely have transgressions
on both sides, if you're a regular viewer of our channel, and I hope you are, you know,
we've spoken to people like Jeffrey Sachs, who's explained to us about the 2014 coup,
how people that are in the Cheney-Bush administration are operating on behalf of the US government
right now, advocating for more aggressive measures.
You know how much military support the US are giving to Ukraine.
You know that Russia feel aggrieved about the impeachment of their initial, not treaty,
but agreement with America after the fall of the Berlin Wall.
No.
complicated story, but you wouldn't know it to listen to Joe Biden. It's a simple tale about sort of bullying or
something that you would how you explain it to a child. They thought that we would
roll over. Listen, listen, it's an insult to your intelligence, I think.
Autocrats only understand one word. No. No. No.
It's actually three words, and I think autocrats probably have good vocabularies.
No, you will not take my country No, you will not... My country?
I thought this wasn't a proxy war.
...not take my freedom.
No, you will not take... Freedom, be careful about that word, by the way.
Freedom, that's a word that's about bigotry now.
It's a far-right word.
Although, some of the units within the Ukraine army might be into that type of freedom.
...my future.
And I'll repeat tonight what I said last year in the same place.
Boring.
I'll find Joe Biden hard enough to concentrate on if he gives a new speech.
It doesn't mean what he said last year.
I'd like to see the narrative evolve a little bit.
Listen, if you're watching this on YouTube or anywhere other than Rumble, we can only stay for a few more minutes.
After that, we're going to be talking about the impact of lockdown on children and several other early pandemic myths that have been busted.
So you're going to want to click that link and join us where the speech is free and the fun keeps on flowing.
Let's analyse Joe Biden's speech a little further, and I want you to particularly pay attention to simplistic, reductive language that tries to frame this complex conflict in terms that allow, I would say, systemic abuses to continue, i.e.
profiteering, post-war restructuring, That's highly profitable for NAE, such as Black Rock.
Have a little look at this.
Have a look at the framing of this conflict.
I like to be spoken to like a grown-up.
Like, this is a difficult situation.
This is a very difficult war.
Obviously, we have an obligation to protect Ukrainian people, but we have said that Ukraine won't join NATO, and now NATO are operating on behalf of Ukraine.
It's very, very complicated.
Yes, there's lots of profits being made from this war.
You know, all of that stuff, that's the kind of conversation I want to have.
Why won't the mainstream media conversation have that conversation with you?
Why are they so complicit?
A dictator bent on rebuilding an empire will never be able to ease the people's love of liberty.
Not a catchphrase, is it?
A dictator hell-bent on rebuilding an empire will never be able to ease people's... I mean, I think the fact that you can't remember it... It's not catchy enough, is it?
It's not like Just Say No or something like that.
Brutality will never grind down the will of the free, and Ukraine Ukraine will never be a victory for Russia.
Never.
That's called jingoism, it's called bombast and reductivism.
We'll be talking more about the complexity and potential threat over the course of the show.
We're going to talk about Putin tearing up the nuclear treaty
and the obvious potential risk that that poses.
If you're my age, you grew up under the threat of the Cold War and potential nuclear plight,
but we thought that sort of stuff was behind us.
And America, up until very recently, had a much more favorable and amenable relationship with Russia.
Where has that gone?
Who's benefiting from this situation?
If you're watching this on YouTube or anywhere else, we're going to click over exclusively onto Rumble right now, because we're going to be talking in a few minutes about the pandemic and several myths that are being busted.
We'll also be talking to Darren Allen, Anarchist and critic of our current social system about his new novel and some of his observation about many of the myths that hold our culture together.
So do join us right now because I'm hankering after free speech, Gareth.
I can tell.
Could you see that?
I'm going to start speaking freely any minute.
Vesuda, the throat chakra, the place of deep truth.
It's about to light up.
So if you're watching this anywhere else, click over and watch us on Rumble right now.
See you there.
Should we watch a little bit of Joe Biden, but I'll be a little bit more critical?
Let's do it.
Fly out from the seat of my pants a bit more?
When President Putin ordered his tanks to roll into Ukraine, he thought we would roll over.
That's the reason why it happened, because there'd have been a lot of strategy, a lot of contemplation, a lot of consideration, and I imagine there's been sort of ongoing discussions about what military intervention would look like, what would provoke it.
You have to consider the Nord Stream Gas Pipeline stuff that's been running alongside this until it was blown up.
It's not running alongside it anymore.
One of the things I resent is the jingoism, the reductivism being spoke to in this tone, even the event itself, Gareth.
Having an event like this in Poland to celebrate the anniversary of a war, is that how the world works?
It's strange.
I mean, obviously, you know, this week we've literally heard we had the news that Zelensky said he never agreed to and was never going to agree to honour the Minsk accord.
We heard that he still wants to retake Crimea.
We've heard that that's a red line for Putin.
We've heard that America is Supporting aims to retake Crimea.
These are all parts of a very complex story that, as we have also had admitted by a NATO chief this week, goes back to 2014.
That you can't just be reduced to a speech with some flags and some pop music.
Even the equation that Gareth just outlined there, Zelensky's admission that they never planned to obey the Minsk accord, What's wrong?
America saying they will report action in Crimea, Putin tearing up that treaty, that's enough to have
That's enough for a nuclear war. That's a recipe for a nuclear war being
Casually read out and it's and it's being framed as if it's like a Beyonce concert. It doesn't seem like the right time
What's wrong?
The Ukrainian people are too brave America, Europe, a coalition of nations from the Atlantic
to the Pacific We were too unified.
Unified, too brave, too reductive, too ridiculous.
This is the level they think you operate at, psychologically and psychically.
You're regarded as idiots and children.
That's what's required for political parentalism to continue and abide.
That's why I'm excited to talk to Darren Allen a little later, because I suppose essential to anarchy is automatic self-rule, self-rule, autonomy.
Freedom!
A word that is now being attacked, but a word that is fundamental to all of us, and I think enshrines values of respect for one another's freedom and differences within it.
Okay, so yeah, there it is.
There's the story about that bloody treaty being torn up.
That takes us into terrifying territory.
And here's a, like, if you're about my age, you know, like from the 70s, 80s, them days, here's a clip of this film.
After I saw this, when I knew that nuclear war was a thing, till I'd seen this film, I didn't know that nuclear war existed and the potential for an apocalypse was real.
When this was on, I said to my Uncle Jimmy, God rest his soul, that film, that can't happen in real life, can it?
And Uncle Jimmy, to his credit, said, yeah.
No, it was bedtime after that.
I'd better think about Armageddon.
There it is the day after.
It is odd that we're not seeing this kind of stuff now, in a sense.
You know, if we're as close as it seems that we are, you know, God forbid, something like this happened, we're not seeing this because I guess it doesn't suit the narrative at the moment.
I think there's a kind of cultural myopia and individual solipsism.
We're sort of locked into screens.
We're locked into a consumer mentality.
We're not invited to consider geopolitical issues unless in the kind of reductive framing offered to us
by Joe Biden.
And certainly on this channel, we don't claim to have the answers,
but with you, we want to engage in the questions.
Let us know in the chat how you regard this shift to individualism, reductivism,
is kind of cultural stupidity at a ubiquitous level.
Loads of people are getting involved in here and actually they're paying attention.
as a reality. Good, you're paying attention. I'm glad. Ash Hether said I wish I hadn't seen that
clip. People are cozying up with their pillows, they're breaking down. One of the things that
concerns me most is that this is a unilateral attitude. In American politics there is some
dissent towards the march towards this particular war from the Republican party. Every single
Democrat voted for all of the military aid packages.
And that's not called a military aid package.
It's military industrial complex products being sent to Ukraine, along with IMF monetary aid that locks Ukraine into political promises in the reconstruction era that will follow this awful war if we ever reach that stage.
You know we're English.
I've never hidden that from you, right?
I'm from the UK.
I've always been upfront about that.
Well, in our political system, it's ultimately the same as yours.
A couple of parties that are basically the same.
If there's any kind of anomalies or fluctuations, they're quickly shut down by the system.
Here's Keir Starmer, the current leader of the opposition, presumed to be the next Prime Minister because our W.E.F.
Bozo current leader can't last too long.
Giggling little schoolgirl, cuddling up to Trudeau, giggling about Vladimir Zelensky.
But this dude, who's a lawyer, is a novice, might as well be just a sort of a node of the state.
Listen to his perspective on the Ukraine-Russia conflict.
It's very important for me to be here in Ukraine with the people of Ukraine, making clear that support for Ukraine in the United Kingdom is united, making it absolutely clear that should there be an election next year and a change of government, the position on Ukraine will remain the same.
It's necessary for globalism to continue its relentless advance that any people that are in potential positions of power, let alone actual positions of power, have to spout and mouth the same rhetoric.
And I just mentioned that there is some Republican opposition to the ongoing military aid and weapons and that going to Ukraine.
But look, Republicans want billions for Taiwan military aid to counter China. So the
war machine in either case is going to be significantly supported. And
what does that make you feel about your political system, your current political
system? Remember we're going to be talking about alternative political systems a
bit later and I think that ultimately...
a new type of populism has to emerge. A decentralized, truly democratic set of systems, a new confederacy.
Something's got to change guys. This is why we're doing all this, to discuss these ideas
with you, isn't it Gareth? Absolutely. That's what drives us. One of the ways that they're
undermining Putin is by saying he's not very well all the time.
Have you noticed that?
Every day, a new health story.
Oh, he's got bad teeth.
Oh, his bum nearly fell off the other day.
He's got bunions.
You should see his toenails.
They're all yellow, they are.
Another way they're undermining him is giving him a jittery translator.
Like, well, the person that's interpreting Putin, he's so like a nervous wreck.
If Putin ever hears this, he'll push that button.
And now there's no treaty to stop him.
Have a look.
It's well known.
None of the countries in the world has such a great number of military bases abroad as the United States.
Oh, America, they got too much military bases.
Oh, no.
Oh, my cat done a piddly-me-berry.
What am I trying to make of that?
Is that designed to make us not scared of Putin?
He's not scary.
This guy's worked.
Look at how he talks and thinks.
The guy's a nervous wreck.
That's not our fault.
When you listen to him sat by them yellowing old 1980s phones in his powerbox, he is very certain, determined, I have killed people, I will kill people again.
Apparently some of the people there, and just look at their first still.
I'll tell you what, they're doing well on the diversity front over in Russia, better than I would have expected, and for that, in my opinion, they should be applauded.
There's like an orthodox Russian minister, there's a Buddhist monk.
It's like a game of guess who.
It's brilliant, isn't it?
Is yours wearing a big green religious hat thing?
I'm afraid to say yes.
Everyone, is it this dude?
You know it is.
Next to the Tibetan monk looking fella.
Let's have a look.
They're bored out of their minds listening to Putin.
They'd probably prefer the jittery translator.
Bored by nuclear war?
If the Geysers are ripping up treaties, they're dozing off the soppy sods.
I'll tell you who ain't bored, the military of Belarus.
While the Russians might be finding this whole thing a bit tiresome.
In Belarus, they're well up for it.
Now, if you look at the presentation of the advancing military conflict from an American perspective, you get all that light and color show going on in Poland right now, simplifying the war, making war into a commodity.
You watch Russia's more ascetic version of it.
The military in Belarus, they talk about war like an old school war.
Like, check this geezer out.
He's up for it.
He's willing to take it there.
Check it.
If you need to fight, you're ready to fight.
Of course, he tells me.
We'll tear you with our teeth.
I'll tear it with our teeth.
I mean, that's not what you want to hear if you're facing them.
We're going to need them little clip-clop robot dogs to send out there, because in Belarus, if they ain't got no weapons, they're just going to eat the people that they're fighting.
Impressive.
Like, I've met quite a lot of people from around that region over the years, Eastern Europe, Ukrainians, like people from around there, Belarus.
I'd say in short, don't fuck with them.
Don't have a war with any of them.
Encourage them.
I've been on holiday where there's been a lot of Russian and Ukrainian people.
They kick your head in just for getting in the swimming pool.
You're acting Ross like there was at some point a peace deal on the table.
And as we all know, that was simply never the case.
There never was a peace deal available that Boris Johnson, our little fluffy baby chick former Prime Minister, went out and derailed for what reason exactly?
That's been sort of widely disseminated now.
We broadly understand that that did happen.
Hey, if you came over here to hear...
Contraband information about the lockdown, stuff you can't discuss anywhere else.
Come a little closer.
Sit down.
Relax.
Here it is.
There's a couple of studies that have come out recently that demonstrate that what many of us suspected, that the lockdown was going to have a detrimental effect on our children.
I'm a father of children and by God, those kids They need all the help they can get, Lemaitre.
Two studies show the pandemic lockdown's devastating effect on kids.
The American public was assured by both the mainstream media and people in federal government that our children were resilient and could easily make up...
Any learning loss incurred through digital at-home learning.
But in September, the U.S.
Department of Education revealed reading and math scores of elementary school students plummeted during the pandemic.
See?
We said that would happen.
COVID-related school shutdowns and delayed reopenings have placed learning losses at the equivalent of a year or more schooling.
So your kids are gonna need to do, like, I don't know, In America you have to do a grade again, don't you?
We have a different education system over here.
Resulting in 6-9% lower lifetime earnings.
Oh poverty!
It's going to lead to poverty!
It's not just now, it's like decades and decades ahead.
More wealth transfer going on.
And look at some of the other myths and stories that were Things that were just dismissed at the beginning of the pandemic.
Johns Hopkins University study reveals Covid lockdowns prevented just 0.2% of deaths.
Is that worth it?
Is it worth cashing in the lives of children for those deaths?
I don't know.
I don't know.
I'm not claiming to be able to make those kind of decisions.
Face masks made little or no difference.
Another one.
You know, when you think of all those things, hold on, what about if these lockdowns are worse than the thing they're supposed to be curing?
Hey, these masks, they work.
Look at this.
Immunity acquired from having COVID, i.e.
natural immunity, is as protective as vaccination.
Oh my God.
So, basically, every single thing you thought Was right.
Difficulty as well isn't it that people find and especially frustrating with regard to the children is that they literally had no choice.
I mean you could say that we all had no choice when it came to lockdowns and in America mandates which at least we didn't we didn't have in this country.
All of those nurses and key workers losing their jobs because of a refusal to be compliant.
I wonder if there will be a spate of legal cases to remunerate them for what I would say is wrongful dismissal on the basis of this evidence.
You see like It's not like we want to bang on and on or sort of say, oh, we were right all along.
That's not really it.
Look, the narrative has shifted significantly and you can observe it in real time.
All I reckon the pandemic provided was a lens for how systems of power operate, how they obfuscate truth, how they change narratives to their advantage.
And when the consequences of that deception come home to roost, they evade it, avoid it, say you're a nutter, smear opposition, shut down dissent.
That's what I'm And who's this affected most?
Lower income children.
It is the story of the pandemic all over again, that these, you know, huge amount of wealth was taken from poorest people and shoveled right to the top.
I think I'm about to coin a phrase.
We've already seen the wealth transfer, now we're seeing an intelligence transfer.
Poor kids are not going to be able to compete, even with the odds already stacked against them.
The odd plucky kid would make it through, but Not for the post-pandemic generation.
Their chances are even more limited.
Okay, it's time now for a deeper look.
I mean, we're looking pretty deeply already.
Would you agree?
Tell us in the chat.
I mean, are you happy with the service?
We're doing our best.
We're trying to bring people together.
We believe in your freedom, no matter where you're from or who you are.
We believe in your right to believe whatever you want to believe.
We know you know stuff we don't know.
We're not preaching to you.
We want you in this conversation with us.
We've got a presentation now, though, we've worked quite hard on, and I think you're going to enjoy it.
Were these Chinese balloons a massive distraction?
How did the media support that narrative?
And how does it compare to the Ohio derailment?
Where, in essence, does the real threat to national security come from?
There, up, up in the sky?
Or there, right in the middle of Washington and at the heart of the corporate world?
Here's the news.
Oh no!
Here's the effing news.
Here's the fucking news!
AHHHHH!
Balloons! They're everywhere!
That's the most dangerous thing that could ever happen!
Certainly more dangerous than POISON in your drinking water!
That's why the mainstream media should focus on AHHHHH! Balloons! Balloons!
Now for a drink of some delicious poison!
You're just like your father!
By now you're aware that the Ohio train wreck has possibly caused enormous toxicity in drinking water supplies.
This is not being significantly reported on or sufficiently reported on.
We're also pointing out how balloons have been prioritised and favoured in mainstream media reporting.
Are these balloons just a distraction?
Is the real disaster toxicity in your drinking water?
Let's have a look at these two stories, how they compare and contrast, why certain information is prioritized, why certain information is extracted, and how your consciousness is being controlled and directed by the media machine.
It's a simple business really.
Let's have a look at what Secretary of State Anthony Blinken has to say about the balloon story, a man whose surname describes what he must have been doing when that train crashed.
Do we still believe that the balloon...
Uh, the surveillance balloon.
Do we still believe in the balloon?
I mean, God, I can't even keep this up anymore.
Listen, you're on the mainstream, focus.
Say it's a surveillance balloon, say it's important, and for God's sake, don't mention that everyone's water's got poison in it.
Over the continental United States was an intentional act, or do you believe that part of it was an accident?
So, there is no doubt.
In our minds at all, that A, this was a surveillance balloon, and B, it was attempting to engage in active surveillance.
And C, it was an evil balloon.
I think a terrorist one.
The U.S.
is reportedly examining the possibility that the Chinese spy balloon was pushed off course by strong winds when it entered U.S.
airspace, with strong winds blowing it south over the border.
The deviation has prompted analysts to explore whether China meant for it to enter U.S.
airspace.
So the whole thing Might have been an accident, literally caused by the wind.
So this is a story about hot air blown around by cool air.
That doesn't really sound evil enough, does it?
A White House official has admitted three unidentified objects shot down by US fighter jets since Friday may turn out to be balloons connected to benign commercial or research efforts.
So that just means they shot down, essentially, balloons.
It might as well have been the Goodyear blimp or Phileas Fogg or that little kid from Up.
Nevertheless, just to be on the safe side, blow it up with a $400,000 missile, I'd say.
I gave the order to take down these three objects.
I say, pleased with myself.
I gave the order to take down these harmless, inoffensive balloons.
This is the level we've literally reached.
The US president is a man who has the authority to take down a balloon, but not to take down your drug prices.
A group of balloon enthusiasts, teens, dads, and grandpas, Joe Biden refers to that group of octogenarians as pesky scamps and youngsters, say they believe their $12 balloon, just like the one in this photo, was the balloon shot down over Alaska by a $400,000 missile.
Doesn't seem like good use of your taxpayer dollars.
$12 balloon, $400,000 missile.
Anyway, $12 balloon or not, it's definitely the most important story in America right now.
It's not as if there's been a terrible, terrible chemical spillage literally into your water that you need to stay alive.
Tonight, growing skepticism in East Palestine, despite the Norfolk Southern Railway CEO pledging to earn the Ohio village fragile trust.
I'm deeply sorry.
He's just trying to sell you on the depth of his apology.
I'm gonna give you an apology now, and it actually goes right down here to beneath my asshole, which I'm shitting out of, into your water.
Shelby Walker lives within feet of the train tracks.
She says in the last two weeks, she, her daughter, and grandchildren have been dealing with eye infections, sore throats, and headaches.
This morning on This Week, environmental experts told Martha Raddatz the equipment used to monitor the chemicals isn't helpful enough.
We've got some equipment for you, ma'am.
Isn't it helpful enough?
No.
We've also got this $12 balloon.
Mayday!
Mayday!
Blow that son of a bitch down!
It doesn't tell us what chemicals are present, it just says they're below some level.
There's plenty of chemicals that can be created from that fire that can be toxic at much lower levels.
Could we get that black cloud of smoke, put it in a maybe $12 balloon, tie it up, float it up in the air?
Then blow the son of a bitch up with a missile!
Bottom line, would you move back to East Palestine if you were living there?
I have two little boys, I would not.
Good news everyone!
The train derailment and chemical spill in Ohio has highlighted just how bizarre such a focus on perceived external national security threats has become.
The far greater threat may be from within.
Perfect metaphor in many ways, we're continually distracted and invited to think that there is a foreign invader or threat, whether it's terrorists, the cold war, or even germs on some occasions, when the real threat is the fact that we live in a deeply corrupt and hypocritical society where where political parties and corporate interests that
transcend national boundaries have such deeply entrenched interests that democracy is redundant and
meaningless.
While they're telling you to look up up up in the sky for superman or a balloon or whatever,
they are down down down on the ground spilling chemicals into your water and exchanging large
sums of money to keep things the way they are.
East Palestine residents were told the municipal water was safe to drink but also advised to
buy bottled water.
It's safe to drink but maybe, you know, you might not want to put it in your mouth and
use your esophagus to swallow it down.
Instead, go to a store and buy water that may not have chemicals in it.
No reason though, just for fun!
And many have complained of rashes after they shower.
Nothing to worry about there.
Residents were told they only had vinyl chloride to fear.
It's only vinyl chloride.
That sounds fucking terrifying.
That sounds like what happened to Venom covered with some sort of awful black lacquer and that your teeth are gonna go all pointy.
I know.
I'd recommend some bottled water.
Drink bottled water, but your tap water is fine straight from the faucet.
Sorry, are you giving me a coded message?
Uh, no.
I also think the water cause is twitching.
But then the list of dangerous chemicals spilled by the train grew.
What, on its own?
Or were they always on it?
Oh no, you know that list we gave you?
Yeah, we didn't put some of the things on it.
So here's the real list.
You bastards!
Federal agencies may not release the full list of chemicals for months.
Why not?
Probably because we'll be so excited about that list of chemicals that we'll all go crazy and jump into the sea and start shooting down balloons without government authorisation.
Oh, you thought that the list of chemicals would be really toxic and worrying and would cause you to lose faith in your government and their regulatory agencies?
That list of chemicals were a surprise for your birthday!
And you've ruined it.
You're just like that Chinese balloon thing that's definitely from China.
Oh God, is there anything in this?
Anyway, this is just a one-off.
Most rivers aren't full of deadly poisons.
Most of America's waterways are likely contaminated by toxic PFAs.
Forever chemicals.
A new study conducted by US water keepers finds.
Don't make it sound nice.
We're forever chemicals.
That's why you're being fertile.
Well, your children will be infertile.
You're not going to have any.
The Water Keepers Alliance analysis found detectable PFAS levels in 95 out of 114, or 83%, of waterways tested across 34 states and the District of Columbia, and frequently at levels that exceed federal and state limits.
Okay, so most water is polluted with forever chemicals, which doesn't sound like very good news unless you're another chemical and you're lonely.
Hold on a minute, we don't know what PFAS are.
They may not be that bad.
Sounds nice, prefers.
Let's see what they are.
PFASs are linked to cancer.
Oh.
And liver problems.
Oh.
And thyroid issues.
Okay, well, it's just me.
And birth defects.
Oh.
Kidney disease.
Mm-hmm.
Decreased immunity.
Is that the end of the list?
It's just one more thing on the list.
Mm-hmm.
Other serious health problems.
When are we gonna get that list?
We'll release the list when we're ready.
Previous analyses have used municipal utility data to estimate that the chemicals are contaminating drinking water for over 200 million people.
That's nearly everyone!
Lacks regulation allows industrial users to discharge the chemicals into the environment largely unchecked.
Landfills, airports, military bases, paper mills and wastewater treatment plants are among common sources.
We're destroying the land, we're destroying the water, we're not going to do anything about it,
because it's simply not profitable.
Regulators and utilities have been slow to address PFAS contamination in part because of cost.
EPA has proposed designating PFOS and PFOA as hazardous substances, which could force industry to fund cleanups for those compounds, but not the other 33 found in the study, or thousands more that exist.
That will leave it up to taxpayers to cover those cleanup costs.
So they make the profits, you do the cleaning up.
And that's freedom.
But not bad freedom, good freedom.
In response to the Ohio disaster, government and railway officials decided to burn off the vinyl chloride, effectively dumping 1.1 million pounds of the chemical into the local community, according to a new lawsuit.
Officials said that they did so to avert the vinyl chloride from exploding.
In contrast, an attorney for the lawsuit has said that the decision was cheap, unsafe, and more interested in restoring train service and appeasing railway shareholders than protecting local residents.
Oh no, that doesn't sound right.
No, no, no.
Not these guys that profit while getting taxpayers to fund the cleanups.
Even just to the untrained ear.
Blowing stuff up, that's always the solution.
Whether it's Vladimir Putin or these chemicals.
Just blow it up!
Everything will be okay.
Who's to say that what comes down in all of the ashes and acid rain won't be good for us and make us into superheroes?
Norfolk Southern basically nuked a town with chemicals to get a railroad open, a former hazmat technician told a local news outlet.
It certainly seems like a company with a $55 billion market cap chose to sacrifice the health of thousands of people to keep its profits flowing.
Unlike the river, which won't be flowing because it's full of stinking brown sludge.
It's just another way of taking the temperature of the way that our systems operate.
When there's the requirement for a decision to be made, the factors that are most important are profit, not the health of ordinary people.
Whenever this system works for you, it's by accident.
Oh, look, I've got a new phone, but it benefits the system in loads and loads of ways.
Oh, I'm eating this food, but it benefits the system in loads of ways.
Your life, your well-being, your experience of reality is irrelevant.
You are a blob of commodity just dumped there to consume.
If ever your interests are at odds with their interests, you are fucked.
That's what I've been learning over the course of running this channel.
Let me know what you think in the chat and the comments.
The situation demands immediate action from President Biden.
Without it, thousands of people, including children and the elderly, fuck them, and animals, will be at continued risk of premature death.
Biden must declare a state of emergency and create an independent task force to take over the remediation of this eco-catastrophe.
That's the sort of thing he'll do.
Norfolk's response to this crisis so far comes from a time-tested corporate strategy.
Manage the situation as a public relations challenge and not the humanitarian and ecological catastrophe that it is.
That doesn't sound familiar.
Government is supposed to protect us from the excesses of industry.
Instead, it often acts like its partner.
That's because the government and corporate interests are partners.
If you don't know that yet, then you've not been listening.
Ah, an environmental disaster that affects the American working class.
I remember Biden from his campaigning.
He cares about the environment, doesn't he?
He can't get close enough to Greta Thunberg and not just to sniff her hair.
And he really cares about workers.
He's the best worker president there's ever gonna be or ever has been, arms cuddling around.
So this is it!
Joe Biden!
Your savor!
Joe!
Oh, Joe!
A looming Supreme Court decision could end up making it easier for the railroad giant, who's train derailed in Ohio this month, to block lawsuits, including from victims of the disaster.
There's no precedent for that.
I don't remember big corporations being granted indemnity for many of the consequences of their actions in re- Oh.
In the case against Norfolk Southern, the Biden administration is siding with the railroad in its conflict with a cancer-stricken former rail worker.
Great!
The railroad!
This is the founding fathers all over.
They'd love this.
Who are you going to stand with?
Big corporation or cancer-stricken former rail worker?
A high court ruling for Norfolk Southern could create a national precedent, limiting where workers and consumers can bring cases against corporations.
No Biden, not on your watch.
Surely Joe, say it ain't so!
Limiting lawsuits is exactly what the American Association of Railroad, the industry's primary lobbying group, wants.
It is also apparently what the Biden administration wants.
The Justice Department filed its own brief in favour of Norfolk Southern.
Oh, so the Biden administration supports Norfolk Southern, not the potentially sick people, not the environment, not railroad workers, not the vulnerable.
Nothing they said while campaigning is true.
That's why I didn't get all excited like it was some sort of big deal.
Such a decision could affect lawsuits filed by residents exposed to hazardous chemicals as the result of accidents in other states, such as the East Palestine-Ohio derailment disaster, which occurred five miles west of the Pennsylvania state line.
Curious at a time like this, a precedent might be established that would prevent forthcoming lawsuits, but that must just be some kind of coincidence, because I know that Joe Biden cares about the environment and cares about workers, not about corporations and giving them an easy ride, which is not what those chemicals got, and we still haven't seen the full list of them.
So it's easy to conclude, then, that America is a country that supports corporations while claiming to care about workers and the environment, but when they get the perfect opportunity to show that they care about the environment by, for example, dealing with an environmental disaster successfully and succinctly, they don't do it.
So does that mean, then, when they're talking about climate change and all that stuff, it's kind of bollocks?
No, it can't mean that.
We'd have to lose our faith in the system to come to that conclusion and that's something that I've not done years ago when I was about 12.
So that's just what I think.
Let me know what you think in the comments in the chat.
I'll be with you in a few seconds.
Thank you for choosing Fox News.
You're welcome.
No, he's the fucking news!
Joe's dog says 400 grand on a missile and poor kids can't afford to eat a school lunch.
McWackwy says, EPA says it's all good now.
Shekelsburg says, does anyone know who the military industrial complex fights for?
Like, whose agenda they are pursuing?
Yeah, we'll be talking about that.
Rolling Rainbow Funder Dear Mother Earth, please do not hold the actions of 1% of our population against all of humanity.
A plea there to Gaia, to the deep systems that underwrite our terrestrial existence.
If you want to join us in the chat, you can.
Click on that locals button and become a member.
of our community. Joining us now is Darren Allen, anarchist and author of Fired and Ad
Radicum and 33 Myths of the System, sharing his analysis on how we might propose, discuss
and bring about alternative systems. Right Darren, thanks for joining us. We met because
I like that book 33 Myths of the System that you wrote, where you talked about a lot of
presumed ideas around our culture.
The myth of education, the myth of science, the myth of fun.
I think a lot of your writing came to people's attention during the pandemic, when your analysis was that the crisis was being used to implement further surveillance and that there was a lot of observable Duplicity, can you talk us through how you came to some of those conclusions and broadly speaking, what you think the significance of the pandemic was and what we can learn from it when it comes to how power operates and the convergence of interests that coalesce around an event like that?
Well, first of all, do you think it was a pandemic?
I mean, by that, I suppose when I'm using that name, I mean, you know, there was coronavirus, SARS, people had symptoms, it was travelling between China, Italy, so under those terms, yeah.
I mean, the IFR, the infection fatality rate was kind of like that of a bad flu.
The all-cause mortality wasn't out of the ordinary.
There weren't people dying in the streets.
Young people didn't die.
All of Africa seemed to get through okay.
Celebrities were getting through okay.
All of Africa first and then celebrities.
Africa of course where the patents weren't made available and so the vaccine weren't so widely disseminated and you're saying there weren't any significant difference in like for alleys or even infection?
Well, the old WHO definition of pandemic used to be a large number of people dying.
And there wasn't.
I don't think so.
I mean, I call it a pseudo pandemic.
In the event then that it was hard?
Straight out the block, Sir Darren.
They'll love you.
Over here in the chat for that pseudo-pandemic.
Plandemic is what they'll be saying down there in the chat.
Uncha, uncha.
So given that you even refute the definition, pandemic, what do you think about the broader response and some of the manifestations around it, mate?
Well, I mean, it takes a while before you can discover what really is behind vast crimes.
I mean, when they're actually happening, no one really knows.
The best analysis I've found is by a guy called Fabio Vigi, I think it is, and he has a pretty convincing case for the fact that it was just a means of pumping in trillions of dollars into the economy and switching off Main Street.
That is basically the modus operandi of the economic system since forever really.
It's a debt-based Ponzi scheme and it's inevitably going to crash and crash and crash and crash and the only way to save it is to print money.
So it's just a way of printing money.
I see, so you think it's economically driven.
When you say something like that... And technologically, I mean it was another, it was an excuse to expand the techno-sphere as well.
Certainly both of those things happened, but ultimately now we're in the terrain of what the mainstream media would
call conspiracy theory.
And I suppose the area of that that's always challenging to discuss is how something of that nature would be
coordinated.
We can see there was a massive wealth transfer. We can see it facilitated greater surveillance.
You can see that it was a soft sell for social credit scoring and introduced ideas that previously would have
been unconscionable.
But when we talk about the execution of a global conspiracy, it always leads to the necessity for collaboration.
Whilst there are sort of propagandist and sort of greenwashing organizations like WEF hidden in plain sight,
while there are bodies like the IMF that leverage debt and their actions around this war and previous wars,
you can certainly apply a comparable analysis to the one you just applied there.
When you say something at that scale is a way of flooding the system with money,
do you feel that it requires actual conspiracy or do you see that the convergence of interest can just bring about
those kind of states?
Option B.
Yeah.
Yeah. I mean, the system is self-operating to a large extent.
It is basically a machine.
And that's something that's often missed in radical analysis, that we are living in a machine.
And you've got the people on the right who own the machine, what you call capitalists, and then you've got people on the left who manage the machine, the professional class.
But it's the machine that is the problem.
We are all suckling at this vast, vast robotic world now.
And it has its own priorities, its own way of working.
It forces us to think and live in certain ways.
It forces us to become like machines.
Yes.
That is the target.
Something as immersive and inherently totalitarian as that will require, do you agree, something quite cataclysmic and seismic to bring about its overthrow.
Yes.
Isn't that sometimes a disheartening paradigm?
No, no.
Gordon, may I?
Fabulous.
That's an opportunity.
I mean, do you love this system?
Does anybody who has a heart beating in their breast?
No.
It's despicable.
It's horrendous.
The faster it can fall apart, the better.
No?
I used to enjoy Mark Fisher's analysis, in particular his book, Late Capitalism, where he suggested that part of the mastery of this system, and he used a comparable Deleuze and Guterres analysis of it being a machine-like system that generated other machines and created that kind of mentality and that kind of lens.
He said that part of what he had achieved meant it's impossible for us to envisage new systems, but we see it as reality.
He said it's easier to envisage the end of the world than the end of capitalism.
A famous phrase that I think Mark coined, God rest his soul, though he was an anarchist and probably a socialist and an atheist, certainly.
So when you're saying that there's some optimism in this, We're all yearning to be free.
We're all yearning for a deeper connection to one another, to ourselves and to nature more broadly.
What is it that you propose?
Obviously, I know that you're an anarchist and so I'm assuming that what you propose as an alternative system is anarchy.
Can you talk us through it, bearing in mind that a lot of people watching this and a lot of people asking this question may have only a rudimentary understanding of anarchy and even a misunderstanding of anarchy because a lot of people relate it to nihilism and punkishness and smash the state, smash the system.
So can you talk us through what you mean by anarchy and indeed what anarchy means more broadly?
Anarchism means freedom from control.
Control by what?
Control by any force that is coercive.
And there's basically seven of those.
There's kings, there's governments, states, corporations, there's the technocratic system, there's the professional institutional system, there's the mass, the democratic mass, and there's the human ego.
The degree to which we can be free of all of those things is the degree to which we can be joyous and free.
Just cutting out one or two of those things, which tends to happen with socialist thinking, for example, okay, let's get rid of capitalism, okay, let's get rid of the elites, or okay, let's attack, you know, the elite doesn't do anything.
The whole thing has to be identified, first of all, for what it is, and then naturally, by itself, spontaneously organic social forms emerge, as they do when anybody is free.
I mean, ordinary people are anarchists when they're at their very best.
So when you are in love, For example, when you have a loving family and everything's going okay, when you have a group of friends, even when you're at work and the boss isn't there, things work well.
Our boss is off, actually.
What, here?
Yeah, and it's going quite well.
Well, there you go.
He was holding us back.
Right, exactly.
So you're saying that anarchy is almost an anthropological system.
It's like a cosmic nature.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The universe is anarchic.
I like the way, mate, that you suggest that there's a deep spiritual component to it, the human ego, that the first system that we must overcome is the system of self and that there's a, I suppose what you say, there's a kind of, if not uniformity, there's a, there is a sort of a kind of a linear expression of freedom right through the self to the systems that we create.
In your book, 33 Myths About the System, I liked how you took on sort of broad topics like science and Fun and professional class and sort of broke down how these things that sort of come together more in a sense, in a sense, faith based systems.
You said a minute ago that anarchy breaks out, you know, wherever it gets its chance.
And I suppose you don't mean like in sort of experimental communities, you mean sort of almost naturally and organically.
Can you talk us through a few examples of it?
Because I think I'd like our viewers to appreciate the possibility that it's something that We talk all the time about how are we going to change the world.
This channel is a lot about critiquing establishment power, establishment thinking.
Similarly, we talk about individual awakening and personal and spiritual awakening not being a subset that is ultimately about how you can operate better within the system, like how many traditionless or hybrid forms of spirituality tend to be applied.
Learn to meditate and be better at your job.
Do yoga and be more attractive to potential mates.
Spirituality that is at its core challenging to these interwoven machines.
Can you talk to us about a few examples of where we see anarchism at play and how we might in our own lives apply anarchism?
Well, the Postal Service, for example, is anarchistic.
Essentially, I mean, they have bosses and they have fat cats screaming it off, but the way that the Postal Service works, no one's in charge of it.
It's self-organising.
There have been times in history when anarchism has had some kind of independent success.
Civil War Spain?
For example, although that was, it didn't, that was anarcho-syndicalism, but that, yeah that worked pretty well, but the supreme example Which we should all look towards for all manner of inspiration in our lives is primal, hunter-gatherer, simple human beings before civilization.
For 99% of our history, we have been anarchists.
Essentially, there has been no democracy.
Democracy is deeply un-anarchist system.
Go on, what do you mean?
Democracy forces you to obey, it's dictatorship of the 51% basically.
It smooths people over into a manageable pace, that's why it rose in popularity, because it's a means to organise and control people, democracy.
And it's something else, which I've forgotten.
Daniel Pinchbeck, who brought me to your attention, is like a mate of mine, a brilliant writer on many of these topics.
He's talked about Oscar Wilde's famous essay, The Soul of Man Under Socialism.
And it's pretty clear that you're not a pro-socialism person.
I know a lot of people at home will have, as soon as they hear that word, will think about the great 20th century expressions of Maoism and Stalinism and all of those kind of expressions of post-Marxist ideology.
What Wilde talks about, it's interesting that we're talking about a romantic genius rather than an avowed philosopher or theologian.
He talked about the idea that technology could be utilized to generate leisure and freedom and an aesthetic culture.
Are you fundamentally anti-technology?
Do you think that it's a kind of utility of power or do you think that we could use technology to create a more liberated and free society?
There's no way.
Why not?
What are we going to bloody well do then, Darren?
We have to go back to simple tools.
Oh, look at the pain on his face.
People are going to struggle.
I know, but that is inevitable.
It's going to happen anyway.
Well, it seems like a post-apocalyptic ideology, in a sense.
Yeah, I mean, yes, that's it really.
Well, I'd prefer that not to happen.
I can't just wander face first into Armageddon safe in the knowledge that immediately afterwards we're going to all be able to eat vegetables at our own pace.
Contaminated vegetables at that.
There has to be an interventionist component to this.
There has to be a revolutionary component.
Is anarchism fundamentally anti-revolutionary because that would require a degree of organisation?
First of all, I don't talk for anarchists.
It's anarchism as it is today.
I mean, I'm talking about a very, very extreme form.
Anarcho-primitivism, basically.
What I call primalism.
Um, so there might be anarchists listening to this just frothing at the mouth.
Um, but as far as I'm concerned, technology itself is a dominating force in our lives and that it's not neutral.
It's connected with a vast system that is, uh, subordinating.
You know, if I, when I start criticizing technology, people often say, Oh, you've got a smart, but I don't actually have a smart, but you've got a phone.
What did you write that would, you know, of course I use individual Items of technology because I live in this crummy world that forces me to.
The system as a whole, the massive interlocking technological system, it's not neutral.
It reduces us to machines and it forces a bureaucratic management system that also coerces and subordinates us.
But that doesn't mean that imagination couldn't be applied to these technologies and ideals.
Certainly, I recognise the value of what you're saying and honouring our nature, but I also feel that we have to start from where we are, that there are such things as electoral democracy that have to be overcome.
And I see that there's a sort of, in a sense, a kind of...
Acceptance that we may be carried by a cosmic flow, by a kind of Gnosticism, a kind of ease.
But me, I've always been a bit more of a conflagratory, let's get stuck in there and bring about a revolution type of person.
Yeah, I'm all for wanton destruction.
Darren, thank you very much.
You've taken us on an incredible journey to anarcho-primitivism, a rare and esoteric sect within anarchism.
I suppose what I mostly take from this is that when we are told that the system is the way it is, nothing can change, it's fundamentally benign, and the best that we can hope for is reform and incremental improvement, when you listen to ideas around anarchism, It bears that, it exposes that as fundamentally untrue.
Hey, look at this!
A quote from Russell Brand on the back, as well as Irving Welch, and Terry Gilliam, Chris Morris, and Alan de Botton.
Check out all of Darren Allen's work, and follow him on Substack, where he writes and where I read many of his essays, and sometimes in the comments.
Oh, you got a bit too far there, Darren.
Thank you very much for joining us, mate.
That's a fantastic contribution.
And now, as if to trivialise the entirety of Darren Allen's contribution and life's work,
here is a singing sex robot mouth that makes you feel that perhaps technology is fundamentally bad.
The system now guys! How do you like your utopia now?
Singing vile sex robots.
I can't look at that and listen to that without feeling a bit of a sense of dis-ease and perhaps longing for a narco-primitiveism.
Well, exactly.
Maybe he's got a point.
Would we be happier, gal, were we to just live in harmony with the system?
Or would we be happier if we were to get ourselves a singing... What can only be described as a sex mouth?
Have you got to the bit... Can we play the clip a little further?
Because I want to see the bit where it starts, like, fluctuating its esophagus.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, it does that, man.
There's a bit... Look at that!
That's not good, is it?
Yeah, that's in our minds now.
That's in our minds forever.
Is the tone troubling you?
Is that what you don't like?
Yeah, it is that.
It's all of it, isn't it?
It's just the whole package.
Yeah, the whole thing's pretty disturbing.
You know how Joe Biden triumphantly emerged in Poland to celebrate one year of wanton destruction and the march towards Armageddon?
Do you think that Biden's walk to that runway would have been any more bearable if backed by good old sexy robot mail?
Let's find out.
I actually think that's better.
Yeah, I think it's more commensurate.
It's more of a soundtrack to a potential Armageddon because that's probably the only sounds that will be existing after that.
When Orwell offers us the vision of the future that can be reduced to a boot stamping on a human face, I think I visited a future as a robot mouth singing a terrifying sort of just multi-tonal song that you can't extract from the sex industry objects that have already emerged.
I'm thinking in particular of the fleshlight, which I've never, you know, I'm going to say this, I've never used one of those things, but I've seen them and I've seen them and I don't like them, gal.
Do they function as a torch as well?
I don't know if it's a two-in-one thing.
Right.
I think it's more like, so you're not embarrassed.
I see.
Oh, you've just got that, oh dear, oh his torch isn't working!
I better, I better change the batteries!
It also sounds like Aphex Twin's song.
I can't remember which one, but one.
Anyway, it's not just the orifice that is being emulated by our AI overlords.
There are now sperm extractors that help patients overcome embarrassment.
Obviously, only the embarrassment.
Look, a Chinese company says its automatic sperm extractor is helping clients collect semen from donors reluctant to masturbate in a hospital setting.
I can't.
No, this isn't right.
Not in this setting.
Why have they gone in the first place?
Because the whole point is, if you're going to donate sperm... Hello, I'm here to donate some sperm!
Well, unless you're going to just spontaneously ejaculate, you recognise what this is going to involve.
You mean, use my hand?
That I eat with?
In this setting?
A hospital where people come to die and take potentially unnecessary medicines that could kill them?
I won't do it!
Well sir, it's your lucky day because we've invented this horrifying dystopian fuckhole.
This unusual machine aims to take the embarrassment out of sperm donation.
I don't think that takes the embarrassment out of it at all.
No.
What that does is it makes it eerie, uncanny, and godless.
Because the only embarrassment would be if you're masturbating in a hospital setting in a room and someone interrupts you.
That's the only real embarrassment.
But if someone interrupts you when you're using this... Oh, that's it.
That's it.
Life's over.
Like, yeah, it's bad enough.
You're in a hospital setting.
Sure.
You're there.
You're in a sperm donor's clinic.
Anyway, people can't go, What the hell are you doing?
You pervert!
What are you doing?
I can't help myself.
We're here to donate sperm and actually thinking about it I did have a sperm test once I now remember and you do have to masturbate into a cup.
Were you sure you have to?
Well, I say sperm test centre, I meant to say cafe.
Like, if you're interrupted in that, if you're standing having that thing sort of at your midriff, pulsating at your midriff...
Sorry, sir.
Everything OK?
Oh, yeah.
I see this one's occupied.
I'm talking about the room.
I'm going to close that door again, sir.
Just going to... You won't see me, right?
You might hear a couple of... No!
Like, no! I want to...
Ahhhhhh!
Well, I finished.
Ahhhhhh!
Called the sperm extractor, it was devised by Ding Gui Jiang, chairman of China's Jianggu Sanwei...
Don't have the name Ding Gui Jiang.
No.
If what you're going to go on to do is invent a false cum sucker, because people are good at it.
It was prophesied.
Ding Weijiang, this was your destiny, sir.
I know, I know.
Look at him, Pat, and he's proud of it.
Of course he is.
And wouldn't you have to have Ding Weijiang?
Mate, have you used it?
Well, of course he has.
That's the thing, you wouldn't just let it loose on everyone, would you, if you hadn't tested it yourself?
Because normally with a technological advancement like that, you say, we're going to test it on monkeys.
Don't worry, I'll handle that process myself.
I've got a monkey at home.
Really?
Oh yes, loads of them actually.
I say at home, I mean in my holiday home in Madrid.
Why did you move to Madrid again?
Mind your own business!
And for God's sake, let me experiment on my machine!
A medical science and technology centre.
Scientist!
I'm a genius!
Hospitals mostly use masturbation as their collection method without providing a venue or equipment.
Mostly.
Of course they do.
What else are they going to do?
It's mostly that.
Well, I've just done a heart operation on your nan.
I've got half an hour and I see that you're sat there.
Well, I have a steady hand, my man!
Yeah, entirely, surely.
Do you think at that hospital, or science unit, the other scientists kind of mock him?
Because they can't all be doing it there, can they?
He's just on his own doing that.
Within the community, he cannot be a highly respected... What did you do today?
I did put, like, a stent in someone's heart.
And what about you?
I removed the tumour from someone's brain.
And what about you?
I sucked a bunch of spunk out of a bloke using my little fuckbot.
Who was that bloke?
Uh, it was me actually.
I can't remember his name now.
Ding Wang something.
Very brilliant man.
Looking forward to that sperm.
I think we're going to help a lot of people.
Also, it's delicious.
No!
We're alright now!
If I can't do a little sippy smugly... Alright, I'll try it, I'll do it.
Maybe if there isn't a Klaus Schwab talks like that, it's because he tastes the other end.
Ding-wang!
Why don't you... We've gone too far now.
It's because I got excited about my perfect topic.
It's robots.
It's a sex robot.
We should have started with this.
Of course we should have done.
This is all we should do.
We're here trying to understand Darren Allen's anarcho-primitivism.
We're experts in this.
We're the absolute elite when it comes to this thing.
We're the Klaus Schwab of spunk-up machines.
This makes collecting sperm on the spot very difficult.
In order to meet clinical demands, we invented this automatic sperm extractor, which is also user-friendly.
No, a bit too friendly.
The machine is equipped with a massage pipe that resembles a vagina.
I've got news for you, mate.
Some interesting colour choices.
How big of a problem was this?
That's my thing.
It's like, what was the data and statistics on the amount of people that left the hospital without having donated sperm?
I just can't imagine that many people who, their whole thing was, I'm going to this, what are you doing today?
I'm going to donate sperm.
And then returned without having done it.
I think he's fixing a problem that didn't exist.
You would say that.
Necessity is the mother of invention.
Oh no, wait, come back!
Another disappointed wanker.
No, no, not in this setting.
Not on your Nelly.
But the day you invent some sort of terrifying pink rimmed sex orifice, then I'm your man.
Ding Wang.
I've got to get his name right because I think there is potentially racism risks here because you're being reductive around a sort of a non European sounding name, but I don't mean it like that.
I'm trying to remember it.
Fact is that, uh... He's a very naughty boy.
You're a very naughty boy.
You shouldn't have made that machine.
And I'm beginning to... Like, how often, like, the amount of thinking is that, is that to go into it?
How okay is this politician?
Like, he's had to think his way through numerous things.
He's spent years doing that.
He hasn't just knocked it up in a weekend, has he?
No, that's not... That's not Tracy Island on Blue Peter.
That's his life's work.
That's someone's life's work.
He's dedicated...
Will you please come make love to me?
I'm busy!
Doing what?
My business!
I'm not going down there.
I can't have sex in that setting.
I'm upstairs with my robot.
My delicious sex robot.
Trust the science!
Fight out the science!
Its height is adjustable, while its speed, force and temperature can be varied.
When I see that, that, for me, that ruins the concept of sex.
Yeah, right.
Like, sex can be so magical, so beautiful.
Reduce it to that.
Because that's all we are.
Like, it makes you think that maybe, like, once they create that, you know, the metaverse and everything, they just strap that to your head.
Yeah.
Strap that to your winkle.
That's right.
What's a temperature?
How high do you want that temperature?
Body temperature.
Not like a toaster.
You don't leave a pattern.
You don't look down at your own penis and see Christ's face there.
Not again.
Not after last time I see him staring up.
What are you doing?
Women have been trying to awaken and bring about global change.
Just give me a minute.
I can't ejaculate.
Not in this setting.
It simulates a female organ and replicates the physical movements of sexual intercourse
by moving back and forth.
It's able to, by a huge extent, provide comprehensive coverage.
Have you considered making one with another hole, possibly?
Sorry, sorry.
Much impression.
This story's not bringing out the best in me.
It's not, is it?
It's bringing out... No, a lot of people like it.
They like it?
Yeah, they're saying, like, he's got his hands behind his back.
He's done a good job of, er, sexism.
Yeah, this is desacralising, look at this, Ash Ella, this is desacralising a very human soul, yeah.
Sex is sacred, sex is a union transcendent of apparent separateness.
And also, it's funny what Gareth said, I think, that how many people were walking out of that hospital waving their hands, oh no, no way, that it became... I bet that's 60 grand, that machine.
Oh yeah, yeah.
Do you reckon?
Oh yeah.
Should we club together, get one?
The machine has also proved useful for urological patients at Shanghai Pudong Hospital, who are unable to produce sperm without a great deal of help.
Dr. Lee seeming unable to break through sperm without a great deal of help.
I need barely any!
I've been making mine on my own since I was a wee lad!
...says it's an efficient way to maximize the... When they're sitting, when they're sitting up, why, what made them think we need a shot from underneath for?
You don't, that's the machine, they're objectifying the sex machine.
What are you going to do, put a little pair of stilettos on it in a minute?
...mount and quality of sperm collected, but says there's still room for improvement.
This device is far more efficient than masturbation.
And I can speak to that from personal experience!
Before you came in here... Oh, sorry!
There are still some weaknesses.
For instance, it cannot exactly simulate the temperature and feel of a female organ.
It's morally wrong.
Back to the lab.
Another five years.
Back to the attic.
Please come down here.
I love you.
I love you.
I'm not coming down there to you.
Not in this setting.
Right.
Well, hey, maybe we'll cover the rest of this in our special show behind the show, Stay Connected, which me and Gareth make on a weekly basis for the members of our community.
And also I read out your comments much more often.
Belly heart, give him a monkey mind.
Probably got thousands of dollars a grant for that.
They always measure the outcome data.
You, saucy lot, you can be a member of this community.
Make beautiful online friendships by clicking the button below and becoming a member of our locals community.
We do loads of extra content.
My stand-up special drops there pretty soon.
Tomorrow, and I can't believe I'm saying this after such a giddying array of pure old jokes, Pulitzer Prize winning journalist Chris Hedges joins us tomorrow.
Oh no, I fucking don't!
On Friday, Jeremy Corbell, UFO expert, will be talking to us about spy balloons, the deep state, the recent spate of UFO sightings, and whether or not it's being used as a distraction, and what the deep state, deep truths are around the phenomena of non-terrestrial life.
For a couple of weeks, guys, we are gonna be off We are going to be off, I imagine, until March the 13th.
There'll still be fresh presentations regularly dropping, meditations and more.
My pre-sale of my stand-up special goes live next week.
If you're a member on Locals, you'll get it for nothing, just as part of your yearly package, but if you want to buy it as a one-off, there'll be some information published soon about how you can do that.
And if you want to come see me live and you're in the United States, on March the 2nd, I'm going to be in Los Angeles at the Vermont Theatre.
On March the 6th, I'm going to be at the Clearwater Theatre in Bilheimer.
No, I'm going to be in Clearwater at the Capitol Theatre, Bilheimer.
I don't know, just click on the link.
Go to Russell Brand and you'll get all the information there.
See you in a couple of weeks, not for more of the same, but for... You could do this bit.
More the different?
That's what I generally say.
Until then, stay free.
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