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April 22, 2010 - No Agenda

01:58:21

193: Goldman Sachs and the Pedo Bear

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	Oh, I'm so scared.
	I don't want to believe it's true.
	Adam Curry, John C. Dvorak.
	It's April 22nd, 2010.
	Time for your Gitmo Nation media assassination episode 193.
	This is no agenda.
	Celebrating Earth Day and a nice dose of cap and trade.
	And coming to you from the Hilltop Watchtower Crackpot Command Center in Gitmo Nation West.
	In the People's Republic of Southern California, where they mowing the grass in the morning, I'm Adam Curry.
	And I'm wondering where the trains went.
	I'm up here in northern Silicon Valley.
	I'm John C. Dvorak.
	It's Crackpot and Buzzkill.
	In the morning.
	Trains?
	My trains.
	There's a train that goes by like...
	At 9.08.
	Yeah, 9.09 or 9.08.
	And there's another one that was supposed to go by.
	There's no trains.
	I don't know what the deal is.
	In the morning to you, John.
	In the morning to you.
	I think it's because of atmospheric dust.
	No, it's ash.
	Oh, there it goes.
	Volcanic ash.
	I didn't hear it.
	I know.
	Well, this mic's a little more directional.
	Hey, dude, you're not going to believe it, but I think I've done something amazing here, and it sounds like you've never sounded better, actually, on the stream.
	Well, then I shouldn't have changed mic so we could do a better A-B comparison.
	No, it's not just the mic.
	I mean, I'm actually hearing the quality being better.
	Oh, so you're not going through a cheap Macintosh laptop anymore?
	No, it is.
	You know, there's one thing we can ascertain.
	Macintosh laptops are not cheap.
	You can get a good Macintosh laptop for $999.
	That's not cheap.
	You can get a PC laptop for $300.
	It's junk.
	So is the $900 Mac.
	That's junk too.
	No, I have a different router.
	Oh.
	Would you have to go buy one or what happened?
	Let's just leave it in the middle.
	Okay, I won't ask.
	Don't ask, don't tell.
	It fell off the back of a truck.
	Don't ask, don't tell!
	Okay, it's episode 193 of No Agenda.
	We're coming up on our bicentennial, John.
	Yes, and we're going to have a special program.
	Oh, really?
	Yeah, we were looking for $200 donations for our 200th episode, and we're going to call it the Deuce Club.
	And now this is a special episode that will...
	Well, actually what we're going to do, no, the 200th episode is going to be an episode, but then we're going to produce a third show for our donors only.
	Just a special little thing, mostly a tribute to them.
	For all donors?
	Well, I think the $200 donors would get the first shot at it, but I think all donors should probably listen.
	I mean, if they've been giving to us all along.
	I don't know.
	We'll talk about it.
	Hey, let's do a meeting.
	Yeah, finally we're there.
	I don't do anything but a meeting.
	Finally.
	The show has reached the level where we have to have a meeting about something.
	Oh God, let's not.
	Let's invite Eric.
	Let's invite Eric to the meeting.
	And let's have an agenda.
	And let's send it out beforehand.
	And then let's send out meeting notes.
	Is that how you do it?
	I want to go shoot myself right now.
	So let's talk about our executive producer for this week.
	Yes, please.
	Okay, so our executive producer is our old friend Dame Margaret.
	Oh, the dame is back!
	Yeah, Dame Margaret George up there in Clovis, New Mexico.
	Or down there, I guess.
	So she's on her way to a second damehood, as it were.
	Well, I was going back and forth with her about, do we need to make, when we make these rings, are they going to be a lady's ring?
	She said she's fine with a man's ring that she could wear around her neck on a chain.
	Women do that.
	Maybe she'd be pinky rings.
	If it's a pinky ring, which, by the way, looks kind of like, you know, mafia-like on a guy.
	It would be with a big old military-style ring, yeah.
	You can always wear it as a pinky ring.
	Yeah, if you've got a big-ass pinky.
	Yeah, you can have it sized.
	And then we have three associate executive producers.
	Okay.
	ESC Inc., ESC Inc.?
	Yeah, ESC Inc.
	No note.
	Well, I think you may have sent a note in an email, but I have to go dig it up.
	Well, it might be kind of important for the...
	Yeah, it might be.
	Okay.
	But ESC Inc.
	256.
	Simon Oxtoby in Queensland.
	And he wants a happy birthday to Dale, his father, who also listens to his show.
	Oh, we're going to do that during the...
	We'll do that later.
	Yeah, during the donations, yeah.
	And Edward Berthuaya.
	Who?
	You know, these Dutch guys keep donating to get me to butcher their names.
	You know, it wouldn't be such a bad thing except half of the names are pronounced as though you're clearing your throat.
	Come on, you can try it.
	I would call it Berthusen.
	No, not even close.
	Well, that's what it looks like.
	It's Beerthausen.
	Beerthausen.
	That's what I meant.
	Yes, Edward Beerthausen.
	Beer Towson.
	You know, I'm actually going to get the hang of this eventually.
	Then I'd like to mention a couple of PR initiatives.
	First of all, right off the bat, Randy Asher has set up noagendaart.com, which is very cool.
	Is this the entire archive of all No Agenda episodic art?
	It's going to be, what it's going to be, I believe, I'm going back and forth with them, it's going to be that and a depository for people submitting art to be used.
	Right, okay.
	So there'll be a lot of art that's not used, a lot of art that's been used, pretty much everything we can shove in there.
	Because we do need a single place instead of, you know, you're doing everything at Drop.io or whatever the heck it is, but...
	That's insecure.
	I mean, at some point, if those guys went out of business or something, then we'd have to go dig up all the art again.
	So this would be something we control, which I think is better.
	We don't control it for shit.
	What?
	We don't control it.
	Yeah, we don't control it.
	No, but I'm saying somebody in the organization controls it.
	Ah, invite Rand to the meeting.
	He's in the organization now.
	The organization.
	That's true.
	Alright.
	All right.
	A couple of PR associate mentions, so not official PR associates, but very valiant tries.
	Adam Merkley was dragged to the golf course by a friend this past weekend.
	He hates golf.
	He sucks at golf.
	So what he did was he wrote in the morning on every single golf ball he used with a Sharpie.
	And of course, they're now in the lake.
	And in the sand trap and all over the place.
	Not a bad idea to have no agenda golf balls.
	I like that.
	Yeah, it's a pretty good idea.
	We got a great picture from Adder1972.
	And I was looking at it.
	At first I thought maybe this was one of those fake pictures on the internet where you fill in your own text and it fills in the picture.
	But I think it's real.
	Adder1972 visited the Russian floating base called Barneo at the North Pole.
	And he took a picture to prove it and sent us a greeting.
	And he says, regards from your northernmost listener.
	So it looks real.
	I think it'd be cool to have in the morning or noagendashow.com in yellow snow.
	Yeah.
	Adder1972, if you're still there, please do this.
	Just don't let it break off.
	Skylar Visconti checked out our No Agenda Firefox Personas and was amazed by the suggested similar themes.
	Are you ready for them?
	Sure.
	The suggested themes along with the No Agenda Firefox Persona are a picture of weed, As in marijuana, Greenpeace, Peace, Save the Bees, Gay Pride, and Buddha.
	I don't know, man.
	Seems a bit off topic, but okay.
	I'm just saying.
	Craig Peters says he has an idea.
	Lots of listeners sign up for web hosting plans, and oftentimes you'll get $50 of free AdWords.
	With your hosting plan, why not use that to promote NoAgendaShow.com, which I thought was a pretty good idea.
	And then our buddy Jim Lunsfeld from over there at NoAgendaForums.com set up something fantastic.
	I'm not sure how long it's going to last, but for the meantime, it's great.
	The NoAgendaProxy at NoAgendaProxy.com, so you can use that to surf sites anonymously.
	Or you can get the show where you can't otherwise get it, or you can get the show without being caught at work, or you can go to Dvorak.org slash blog in China.
	Yes.
	Or you can go to the donation sites, Dvorak.org slash NA or Dvorak.org slash NAS, which are blocked in Russia.
	So I think that's a great initiative, and eventually I'm sure we'll get scanned out.
	But it's also great for kids at school who can't use outside sites, or I'm sure we're being filtered at many schools.
	I would hope.
	No agenda proxy.
	What's wrong with these people?
	All right, so we want to thank our executive producer for today's episode, episode 193, Dame Margaret George, coming back to support us once again.
	We appreciate it highly, and of course, our associate executive producers, ESC Inc., Simon Oxtoby, and Edvard Bierthausen.
	You all know exactly what you have to do.
	You've got to go out.
	You've got to propagate the formula, which is simple.
	Our formula is this.
	We go out, we hit people in the mouth.
	Milk.
	Water.
	Order.
	Stay with me now.
	Shut up, slave.
	I'm feeling like a slave today, John.
	And let me tell you...
	By the way, before you go into that, I just want to mention we do have a black knight, Scott Rodriguez, who will kick off later.
	I feel like a slave.
	Because of the ash in the air?
	No, no, no, no, no.
	I've discovered something pretty nasty going on with Homeland Security.
	Mickey has a container arriving today, hopefully after the show.
	You never know where these guys...
	And, you know, it costs a lot of money to fill up a 20-foot container and have it all packed up and shipped over here.
	And then she gets a call from the shipping agent over on this side earlier in the week.
	Well, your container's here, and as soon as it's out of the CES, we'll send you the final bill, and then we'll bring it out.
	They're like, what?
	What do you mean, what final bill?
	Paid for this thing to be packed, shipped, unpacked, everything.
	What are you talking about?
	Well, I had to look up all the regulations and all the laws, but here's how it works.
	Ever since the Department of Homeland Security has been erected, of course, after 9-11, 95% of all shipping containers go through special scanning when they enter the port.
	And here's how it works.
	Your homeland security dollars are not used to do this.
	Oh, no, no, no.
	It goes to a commercial company, a monopoly in most states.
	I forget what it's called here.
	It's like TransRipU, Inc., And there's a customs examination service center.
	And what they do is they drive your stuff there, which costs a couple hundred dollars.
	Then they have a commercial company open it up, take everything out, so a customs dude can come by and go, yep, yep, looks good, yep, pack it all up, boys.
	$1,800!
	Well, this sounds like an out-and-out scam.
	Yeah, but it's in the law.
	I looked it up at the website.
	Oh, so this was one of those laws written to benefit some private companies.
	Yes, of course.
	Well, they have to publish their fees, and so they published their most recent fees in 2005.
	It's like if you've got garments, and you know what?
	Women happen to have a lot of garments that they ship over.
	Many do, yes.
	That's like $1,200 right there for a container that has garments.
	It's a huge rip-off.
	And of course, if you ship it to Kansas...
	Oh, well then it's only like $300.
	Should have shipped it to Kansas.
	If I had known...
	Wow.
	Wait a minute, let's back up a second.
	Why would it be cheaper in Kansas?
	Because there's less corruption there, I guess.
	Oh, that's what it is.
	I really don't know.
	That's what it is.
	But even the shipping agent said...
	Yeah, I know.
	This is really messed up.
	And it's even hard to get a final itemized bill of exactly what they did.
	Because you know they're probably not even unpacking this crap.
	They're just giving the container some air.
	Yeah, why would you bother?
	Yeah, and then the shipping agent said, oh, and by the way, you know, we see of the 5% that don't get scanned, they're from like Afghanistan.
	I'm like, oh, of course!
	That's with all the heroin.
	Yeah, heaven forbid.
	Heaven forbid they actually find anything.
	She literally said that.
	What would we do?
	She literally said that.
	Yeah, we see containers from Afghanistan.
	They never get special screening.
	So I'm like, okay, there you go.
	$1,800.
	And my shit hasn't come yet.
	Oh, well, there's another $1,800.
	I know!
	Shouldn't Homeland Security be doing this as a service for my tax dollars instead of being farmed out to some commercial company?
	Bastards.
	It never ends.
	No, it doesn't.
	Nor does the Polish two to the head.
	No, the story's getting better.
	It is.
	Now, of course, we played you the video with the gunshots last week, although there's a lot more analysis has been done on it, and even stuff that I didn't see.
	There's people walking around, jumping out of the plane, getting apparently shot.
	Why do we laugh at this?
	Because it's so blatant.
	We're not even surprised.
	It's like, of course.
	But now people are really doing some analysis on this video, and it's linked once again in the show notes at noagendashow.com.
	This allegedly was from a guy, and he's running around there right after the accident.
	But you literally do see people in the background jumping either off of debris or out of the airplane.
	And there are several different translations that are kind of put in as titles in these YouTube videos.
	And there's a lot of dispute over that.
	And I just really can't say one way or the other what the correct translation is.
	Because, you know, I don't speak Russian or Polish for that reason.
	For that matter.
	But I have to say, it looks like they're just shooting people.
	And then the guy...
	Who shot this video was stabbed, taken to the hospital in critical condition, and apparently they unplugged his life support at the hospital.
	When was the guy stabbed?
	Well, we know why, but what was the cover story?
	There is no cover story as far as I know.
	The guy was just stabbed.
	Oh, how unfortunate.
	And they didn't even bother to come up with a cover story?
	Someone tried to rob him or something?
	They don't care anymore.
	I know.
	I think they're getting careless.
	This is getting too sloppy.
	Yeah, and then there's just another two to the head.
	I think it's the second highest member of the Polish church.
	60-year-old I'm reading Polish now, John.
	This is bad.
	I'm actually reading Polish.
	No, I'm sorry.
	This is Polish.
	This is German.
	That's how you can read it.
	I don't know if he wasn't able to catch a ride on the plane to the Kuten commemoration, but he went...
	I guess he went by car...
	He attended the ceremony, of course, after all...
	I'm sorry, not the ceremony.
	He attended the funeral.
	And he drove back and he had a fatal car accident.
	I mean, it's just like, there's just so much crap.
	Like, they didn't have enough guys.
	They already got a religious leader in the plane.
	It's like, let's get the number two guy while we're at it.
	Let's just drive him off the cliff.
	This is like getting, yeah, I don't know.
	I mean, this is a strange, strange story.
	Apparently, of course, we have a couple of Polish listeners, and they've told us that none of this is even suggested in the news media there.
	Well, the thing that I'm getting, what I'm hearing, is that, yes, this was a hit, but not by the Russians.
	Yeah, well, this is your theory, too.
	Well, because I'm hearing...
	It happened in...
	Wasn't it in Russia where it happened?
	It happened in Russia, yeah.
	What, with the Germans sitting on the ground waiting there so they could shoot these people jumping off the plane?
	We have our vays.
	Eh, I'm not buying that.
	It seems Russian to me.
	Except it's so careless.
	You'd think they'd be a little slicker.
	Like the thing would first land if there was anybody...
	The plane would blow up to smithereens because it happened to land on an ammunition dump.
	Well, the thing...
	It didn't blow up.
	It just kind of like...
	It looks like it fell apart.
	I mean, there's all kinds of...
	I mean, I don't know.
	You know what?
	It stinks.
	The whole thing stinks.
	No, it does stink.
	The whole thing stinks.
	And, you know, have you heard anything about it in the media at all?
	Forget about Polish media.
	In American media, is anyone questioning this?
	No, it was just reported at the beginning and no one said anything since.
	And no one's talked about the dead camera guy who took the movies of these guys being shot.
	And who's been stabbed to death.
	And stabbed to death under...
	That's also not a nice way of doing it.
	You know what I mean?
	What are we going to do?
	You have a gun?
	You don't want to stab the gun.
	My gun does not work.
	Stab the bastard.
	He didn't die.
	Oh, go disconnect his tubes.
	It doesn't sound like professional.
	If you wrote this as a script, it would be a comedy show.
	If you said this is a serious spy novel, they'd be like, why don't you go back to the drawing board and write something realistic?
	This is no good.
	This would be rejected by every Hollywood studio.
	It's like, no way.
	No way.
	It never happens that way.
	It's too dumb.
	Do some covert stuff.
	We have a couple other things to follow up on if you just want to get them out of the way.
	Yeah, let's do that.
	Ashmageddon.
	Oh yes, Ashmageddon.
	Okay, so I'll just say three things about this.
	By the way, before you say even one thing, you did catch the story about the guys who took office.
	Oh, I smell ash!
	Yeah, the sulfur.
	It was...
	I think it was a...
	What was it?
	It was a Cook's tour flight.
	Yeah, that's what it was.
	British...
	Thomas Cook, right.
	But then...
	The engine didn't stop or anything.
	No.
	He said he smelled ash.
	Right.
	Are you sure he didn't say ass and it was just Kevin Smith sitting on the plane?
	I mean, you've got to be sure about it.
	It can be weird transmissions on the radio.
	So one thing that happened during all of this is there was a huge NATO military exercise scheduled for exactly the same week or five days almost called Brilliant Ardent.
	And there's conflicting reports.
	Some military reports saying, well, you know, we couldn't fly.
	Others are saying, well, we flew.
	And it wasn't just in the sky, by the way.
	It was also a marine-based...
	exercise which coincided with the Dutch Air Force as well.
	Their version of it was called Frisian flag.
	So there's a lot of information in the show notes and you just have to draw your own conclusions.
	I couldn't get it one way or the other.
	But you sent a very good question to me through email.
	You said, okay, so maybe this is a setup, but to what end?
	Why was your question?
	So I have two theories for you.
	One I already said right off the bat, which was railways.
	And whether this was intended or prolonged, perhaps.
	So maybe people just freaked out and said, oh, we've got a ground flight.
	And then it was like, hey, this is an interesting crisis.
	What can I use it for?
	Well, that's interesting that you would bring that up.
	Of course, you brought it up before.
	But during this crisis, there's been an inordinate number of advertisements for Siemens and high-speed rail in California.
	Hehe.
	You said Siemens.
	Yes, the European Parliament on Tuesday said the 27-country bloc has reacted too slowly to a crisis that has shown an urgent need to bring other forms of transportation up to date.
	Member States should finally learn a lesson from what has happened, said Center-Right Minister of European Parliament, Marion-Jean Mariscu, a member of the Parliament's Transport Committee.
	The modernization of our railroad transportation is a priority!
	We talk a lot about it.
	Hey, lady.
	Hey, lady.
	What good does it do to modernize it when they're on strike?
	Really?
	What difference does it make?
	That's a part of it.
	Make automated.
	Get rid of people.
	Get rid of people.
	We talk a lot about it.
	Don't do much.
	In Europe today, you can't buy a train ticket to travel in a civilized way from the north of Europe to the south of Europe.
	What?
	Yeah, that's what she said.
	That's bogus.
	In Europe today, you can't buy a train ticket to travel in a civilized way.
	John, civilized.
	Now remember, these are elites talking, so they need like caviar and, you know, little ball ticklers.
	You can't buy a train ticket to travel in a civilized way from the north of Europe to the south of Europe.
	Rail travelers often complain they have to buy tickets for each stage of their journey.
	Oh, we need more harmonization and integration.
	That's what it's about.
	So that's one.
	But then I thought about this, and I came across a very interesting story.
	And first I thought, okay, the global warming movement has really jumped the shark when they're saying, oh, these airplanes that are grounded, that could lead to a rise in temperatures.
	I'm like, okay, now these guys are totally off their rocker.
	But then I thought about it.
	So first of all, a study conducted after commercial flights were grounded...
	This was...
	Yeah, I'm going to interrupt you for a second.
	After 9-11, people started looking at the documentation and they found out something interesting, which you're going to tell us.
	They found out that after three days of essentially all flights, except for Arab flights, being grounded...
	The average daily temperature range in the U.S. rose markedly, exceeding the three-day periods before and after by 1.8 degrees Celsius, which is a reasonable jump.
	So let me just finish the thought.
	The same guys who brought you global warming, i.e.
	the Met Office, Are the same guys who had the computer models that brought you Ashmageddon?
	That's the connection I'm making for you.
	I'm liking this.
	And that to me...
	Because it actually was.
	In fact, I was reading some reports about how the...
	Oh, now they're starting to say...
	In fact, we got some email on this.
	Now they're saying that the computer models were bad.
	Might as well stay consistent, right?
	The computer models were bad about Ashmageddon and maybe we didn't need to ground all these flights and blah, blah, blah.
	We could have flown around this and that.
	And then if you dug into it, it was the same basic group doing the modeling that's modeled the global warming stuff.
	So doesn't it make a lot of sense if they know, and they've had this data for a decade, if they know that, or almost a decade...
	That by grounding flights, the temperature will rise, so European temperatures will rise by 1.8%, and these are the guys who are saying it's getting warmer.
	Wow, doesn't that make a lot of sense?
	Especially since we know they didn't actually do any measurements on the ash cloud.
	They just said, oh, that's dangerous.
	Let's stop all flying.
	Well, I like the theory.
	It's impossible to prove, of course.
	Well, I hope someone else picks up on it, because no one seems to be making these connections.
	Nobody cares.
	That's the problem.
	Nobody cares.
	We have a bunch of listeners who, I don't even know, I think a lot of our listeners do care, kind of, but I think they're mostly just entertained by our crazy ideas.
	Meanwhile, of course, the true tragedy is in Iceland.
	Now, 90-some years ago, when this mountain blew its stack previously, a lot of people died.
	And the reason why they died was not necessarily because of breathing volcanic ash, but it killed all the crops due to the high, and this is nice, fluoride content.
	And of course, because there were no crops, the sheep and the cows couldn't eat, and people died of famine.
	And once again, the fluoride levels in this ash is...
	It's wreaking havoc in Iceland, which I'm sure no one cares about either, except us.
	Which, of course, makes me also question fluoride again.
	Well, you know, luckily most of this is blowing toward England.
	Luckily.
	Sorry, chaps.
	And curiously, the Reykjavik airport is still open with flights to the United States, so we could actually go visit this thing.
	Now, I have to ask you a question about the no-fly zones and all the rest of it.
	I was looking at a bunch of these photos of the volcano, and it was obvious that these photos were taken by someone in an airplane.
	A helicopter, yeah.
	Or whatever.
	But there's lots of great shots.
	I mean, this thing, apparently, this particular ash is electrically conductive.
	Yeah, it's beautiful.
	And it's blowing up through the glacier, and so you're getting a lot of weird lightning that's interconnecting the clouds.
	And the UFO formation, I'm sure you saw that video.
	No, I didn't.
	Oh, it's fantastic.
	It's a V-shape of probably eight or nine craft hovering right near the volcano.
	That would make sense because they have to promote the reintroduction of the KGO or, sorry, ABC show V. So that would make sense to plant something like that.
	It's good promotion for V. I'm not even...
	Which by the way sucks.
	Yeah, V blows.
	Could you guys promote something else?
	Yeah.
	And even if it's aliens who are promoting V, you guys are off your rocker.
	You gotta get some new shows up there.
	We like the show V! They're probably still watching the old show, because it takes so long for it to get to their dishes up there.
	They're watching the original V series, which was okay.
	That's the one where they eat the squirrels or whatever.
	Yeah, so your aviation question is, is it okay for these aircraft to be flying in the volcanic area?
	Well, of course, it's ridiculous.
	Well, they're not flying through the visible part of the cloud, which is the whole point.
	And these are turbine-based helicopters, so they would have the exact same issue.
	Right.
	They would have the same turbines.
	Today's modern turbine engines are used, JP-4, the same jet fuel.
	They're jets with a prop hook.
	It's a jet engine, yeah.
	With a big prop.
	Yeah.
	Which we call a rotor.
	Rotor, that's the word I was talking about.
	So, of course, it's bogus.
	The whole thing is bogus, and that's why I'm really liking the global warming angle.
	I like the theory about global warming.
	I'm liking the global warming angle, and I definitely still think that this is, at least it's going to be used to promote more trains.
	Which, by the way, economically speaking, John, it's not a bad idea.
	They need to kickstart some kind of economy around something.
	So it might as well be trains.
	Well, I like, you know, the thing is I like trains, so it doesn't bother me that much.
	Although they're not as convenient necessarily as an airplane or fast.
	Definitely not as fast.
	So I set that one, you know, that one, the interesting one, which I don't understand why we don't talk about it at all in this country, is the, I think it goes from the Beijing airport to Beijing, the Maglev train that does 450.
	Yeah.
	A friend of mine took it recently.
	It's only been introduced, like, I think a year or a year and a half ago.
	And a friend of mine took it and says, unbelievable.
	For one thing, it's a maglev, so it has no wheels or anything.
	It just kind of sits up on magnets.
	It's a nice smooth ride, yeah.
	And then it just blasts off like a, you know, bat out of hell at 400 miles an hour.
	And we don't even, it's like nobody even knows us.
	Nobody in the United States, you know, Americans are very, I keep telling people.
	Americans are stupid.
	Is that what you keep telling people?
	No, they're naive.
	I keep telling people, you want to do something for the weekend.
	People in the East Coast, I think if I lived in New York, for example, I'd be going to Paris every weekend, or not every weekend, but once in a while and a good deal.
	Fly over to Paris, have dinner, spend a couple nights, come back.
	On the West Coast, we have the opportunity to do something similar, even though it takes a few more hours.
	But I know from Vancouver you can get to Shanghai in, I think, around seven hours, maybe six.
	But...
	Whatever the case, I say, just pack up, go to the council, get yourself a visa, and go to Shanghai for the weekend or for a couple days because it's dirt cheap.
	You can get a really great hotel room for less than $100.
	The place is jumping.
	You get some of the best restaurants in the world.
	You can have the time of your life and come back with a little insight as to what's going on in China because most people don't have a clue.
	But if you go there once in a while, It's a real eye-opener and I advise people to just visit.
	And I know that there's not that much of that going on because when I go to China and I don't care where it is, I'm like the only white guy that I see for days.
	You're a novelty.
	Well, actually, it was a novelty.
	I went to the city's Jamin, which has an art dealer I was visiting.
	And we decided to go float around town.
	They have a little amusement park, which is a total piece of crap.
	And by the whole time I was there, every time I went to a restaurant or anything, everyone would stare at me.
	Because apparently, you know, the number of white folks...
	You know what they were staring at?
	They were like, look at how that guy holds his fork.
	Oh, my God.
	Can you believe that?
	He used chopsticks in China, my friend.
	No kidding.
	No kidding.
	So anyway, we went to this little park and a bunch of Chinese kids demanded they all take pictures of me with them.
	Yeah, well that's kind of the same when I went to the Longnecks in Thailand.
	Then, of course, right after they...
	Oh, take a picture with me!
	What is this?
	Hey, your neck longer than mine!
	We need a no-agenda junket to Shanghai.
	That's what we need.
	That would be good.
	So, um...
	Actually, that might be not a bad thing to set up with some travelers.
	You get a bunch of the no-agenda mavens and we can all go together.
	Yeah, let's get Thomas Cook.
	Hey, you know, John, great idea.
	Let's get all the no agenda people on a plane and let's fly to Russia.
	This is a great idea.
	And let's make sure we have it checked a year before by the Russians.
	This is great.
	Maybe not.
	Alright, a couple of updates on Haiti and then I'm done because I just don't want to forget that we started talking about the shysters that show up and just send us your cash and this outrageous bullshit that's going on with Haiti.
	This was sent to me by one of our producers, Philip Regner.
	At his local Safeway.
	A note on the door.
	Please note, due to the current situation until further noticed, Western Union will not be accepting money transfers to Haiti as it cannot guarantee delivery of funds.
	Well, how does that work?
	Isn't that just like an electronic thing?
	Well, apparently he's been intercepted by some agency.
	You know, that's just weird.
	I mean, Western Union, they just hit a couple of keystrokes, it pops up on the monitor at the other end, and then someone just dishes out some cash.
	So does that mean that, to me, it's like, okay, so all that money we texted, it's not making it?
	I didn't text any because I knew this would happen.
	So, the BBC is reporting something very interesting.
	And this just really gets my goat.
	So, what is about to happen in the next four weeks?
	We've got the rainy season coming.
	This is when these people, and the reports are about 2 million people who are still displaced, living in tents, sleeping in mud, which is soon to be waist-high mud, going to be washed away.
	So what does the U.S. military say?
	Well, we'll be out by June 1st.
	We don't want to be here helping anybody.
	It's just like, this makes no sense.
	It makes no sense.
	Everything's in place.
	That latest report, of course, was that a lot of the donations and money from the UN is being used to fund the UN in Haiti and give fat salaries to a bunch of people in a whole housing complex building for them.
	Yeah, $732 million.
	A couple of notes about that in the show notes at NoAgendaShow.com.
	So, that's kind of interesting.
	I'm surprised that the Haitians...
	It's a good thing they're not armed to the teeth, because I think they'd be shooting people left and right.
	Oh, well, there's all kinds of reports of the violence and the gangs, and this one was just crazy.
	The district attorney in Brooklyn, New York...
	Has said, oh, I think we need to contribute.
	So he sent over seven truckloads of confiscated counterfeit designer clothing and shoes.
	I didn't know this.
	Yes.
	Nike, diesel, Chanel sunglasses.
	Oh, this is ludicrous.
	Yeah, yeah.
	Okay, let me explain to people that don't know this, but in New York City, there's a street, and you can go there and visit.
	Yeah, it's Canal Street.
	And Canal Street, depending on what side of the street you're on, has all these counterfeit goods, and they have lots of them.
	Watches, Rolex watches you can get for anywhere from $10 to $40, depending on the movement.
	All kinds of clothing, lots of bags.
	Oh, yeah.
	There's Louis Vuitton bags.
	Louis Vuitton bags, yeah.
	Phony baloney cross pins.
	I mean, just everything.
	And a lot of them, of course, are the real deal.
	Maybe they have a small defect or it's done in the same factory, just pumped out through a different channel.
	Much of the stuff's done in the same factory.
	Especially when you see some really obscure watch that looks exactly like...
	I mean, because who's going to counterfeit this thing?
	I mean, it's like it's too much work unless you already have the dyes and you're making them already.
	Well, so permission was obtained from manufacturers, including Nike, Timberland, antique denim jeans, black label, Christian Audigier, allowing these knockoffs to be donated to the Haitians because, according to Kings County District Attorney Charles J. Hines, if they're going to die, they might as well look good.
	No!
	I made that up.
	I made that up.
	Yeah.
	But it's like, what?
	This is crazy.
	It's just absolutely nuts.
	I'm sorry, it's not quite as nuts as...
	I had some more on the toothbrush thing.
	That's for real, man.
	That toothbrush.
	Bring a new toothbrush for the people for Haiti.
	But here's a dichotomy, and then I'll get off it.
	So, there's some pictures that are surfacing.
	Of 61,000 pounds of butterball turkey that have been shipped to Haiti.
	Now, first of all, this is a dumb thing to send.
	Because turkey needs...
	I mean, this is not a handy item.
	It needs to be kept frozen.
	Well, it has to be refrigerated, not necessarily frozen.
	Well, the box says keep frozen.
	I'm looking at the box right here.
	Oh, they're probably because they're frozen.
	They're frozen, yeah.
	You don't want them to thaw and then refreeze them.
	Yeah, once you thaw them, you have to cook them.
	Yeah.
	So, but they're stacked.
	And the reason why they're stacked, and this is a report from...
	I think it's from CBS. And let's just listen to this for a second.
	I've taken your advice and I've made an actual sound clip recording instead of playing the online video.
	Of all the things you've heard about earthquake aid to Haiti, here's something you probably didn't know.
	Haiti's government wants large-scale food assistance and free healthcare to stop.
	If it's news to you, it was to us too when Katie Couric recently visited Haiti and spoke to Erin Boyd, a nutrition aide for UNICEF. Okay, it's all the UN people there, right?
	So you always got to be wary of that.
	Boyd disagrees with cutting back on aid, but told why it's being done.
	When you continue having a lot of food distributions, you lower the price of food so that people can't trade, and it disrupts markets, basically.
	In other words, there may be such a thing as too much help.
	The public outpouring is so generous, it's interfering with the Haitian economy.
	If food is free, local farmers can't sell what they grow.
	Desperately poor residents who aren't earthquake victims are moving into refugee camps for the free food and health care.
	But the government wants residents to be less dependent on foreign aid, not more.
	Susan Reikley is with USAID, the U.S. agency that distributes foreign aid.
	First of all, do you buy this?
	Isn't this just crazy?
	It's disturbing the local economy?
	It's bogus.
	So that's why these butterball frozen turkeys are just stacked up, thawing, leaking turkey guts at the airport there.
	You know, it sounds like they just had a bunch of overstocked turkeys and they wanted to get rid of them.
	What can we do?
	Well, I got a good tax write-off, Jim.
	Hey, let's send them to Haiti.
	Let's send them to Haiti.
	We get to write off on the whole deal.
	Yay!
	You got promoted.
	You're now vice president.
	Good job.
	It's already spent $562 billion on Haiti relief.
	As they've requested that these large-scale food distributions and as well as some of the large-scale programs which are really pulling people into the camps, we're working with them.
	and we are in complete agreement with them on this point.
	Pulling back on aid means something a lot of American donors might find unthinkable.
	Even as many go without meals, relief food that's already made it to Haiti is now being sent to warehouses for future disasters.
	USAID calls it pre-positioning.
	Ooh, we have a word.
	Ooh, new word, new word.
	Pre-positioning.
	Pre-positioning so you go hungry.
	Pre-positioning.
	Did you see the Haitians lining up?
	Hey, can I have some of that pre-positioned food, please?
	I'm really hungry.
	And some of that pre-positioned healthcare?
	Because, you know, you're ruining the healthcare economy.
	Oh, that's it.
	They've got to have a healthcare bill, maybe.
	That's what they want.
	This is nuts.
	Did she not clearly say food and healthcare?
	I didn't hear the health care.
	Yeah, yeah.
	It was the first thing she said.
	Food and health care.
	But health care, we have to pre-position your health care because we need the local economy.
	Pre-position means get in line.
	A new word.
	Get in line.
	Get in line.
	Yeah.
	Stay tuned for that word to show up.
	What are you doing to those people?
	Well, we're pre-positioning.
	Yeah, we're pre-positioning them.
	That's right.
	So there's enough left now to pre-position for future needs.
	And that's exactly what we're doing.
	Thank you.
	The World Food Program.
	What?
	How can they do this?
	How can you come up with some bogus new word and you just casually throw it out as though it was always in the lexicon?
	Well, because they're divorcing themselves from old vernacular.
	It's the new speak.
	You gotta pay it.
	I love this stuff.
	This is great.
	What?
	I said it's unbelievable.
	The food aid branch of the UN also tells...
	This is USAID. CBS News is scaling back food aid at the request of the Haiti government, storing food for future needs.
	The Haitian government, put in by the US and helped put in there by the CIA, were on board with the program to turn this into a tax haven and gambling paradise with roads like Hillary Court.
	And Bill Jefferson Way!
	The shift away from free food on a massive scale has been done quietly in Haiti and has opened a can of worms.
	Which they can eat!
	Have your can of worms!
	Eat your worms!
	...who need to keep the donations flowing worry that once word gets out, people will be less likely to give.
	Others say that donations meant for earthquake relief food should not now be used for other needs.
	As of tonight, total donations to Haiti meet and exceed the biggest estimates of how much it will cost to rebuild, up to $14 billion.
	The record-breaking Hope for Haiti telethon in January brought in more than $66 million.
	That's all we brought in, by the way?
	$66 million?
	That's it?
	That sounds like they're fudging the numbers on the low side.
	That doesn't make any sense to me.
	I mean, the whole world watched that.
	We were in awe.
	We had tears.
	The whole world watched it.
	That should have been a lot more money than that.
	We were texting our $10.
	It was lovely.
	Part of the $4 billion raised by non-government groups and charities.
	The U.S. government has given more than a billion dollars and has pledged another billion-plus.
	Other countries and world bodies have pledged $8.75 billion over two years.
	That's $14.9 billion and counting.
	With all that aid pouring in, some worry that it will feed corrupt and criminal elements rather than the needy.
	There are reports of gangs intercepting aid and selling food on the black market with impunity from high-ranking officials.
	It's just one example of the complexities in play when trying to show up and take advantage of people's goodwill and generosity.
	Yep.
	There you go.
	That's your Haiti report.
	Things going well.
	Yeah, well, I don't know what to say.
	Well...
	You know, it's just a...
	I don't know.
	Let's talk about something else.
	I mean, we can harp on this.
	This will never end until the hotels are built and then we're invited to some sort of a...
	Swanky opening.
	Yeah.
	And we'll go there and it'll be all Hades behind the crap table.
	The jingle, by the way, should be New Speak of the Week.
	That's a suggestion from the chat room.
	New Speak of the Week.
	Yeah, I like that.
	New Speak of the Week.
	Because we do seem to have one about weekly.
	We need a Jeff for that one.
	Yeah, Sir Jeff.
	Okay.
	Sir Jeff.
	What you got for me, my brother?
	Well, we do have some...
	I have a couple of interesting...
	I have a lot of...
	My clips this week are all, you know, from...
	Let me get to a blank screen here.
	By the way, can I just say that...
	Can I just jinx it for a moment and say that the sound quality is outstanding.
	I hear you great today since I made this change.
	And we have not been kicked off yet.
	But we're coming up on the 45-minute mark, so any minute now.
	Yeah, well, the kicking off is a different thing.
	And the sound quality, I'm sure...
	How are you receiving me on that end?
	Is it good?
	In the morning!
	Yeah, you sound the same as you've always sounded.
	You sound fantastic.
	Okay, thank you.
	Thank you, baby.
	That's what I need to hear.
	Reaffirmation.
	Except for that part.
	Yeah.
	Okay, let's see here.
	While you're looking, have you seen the website newmoney.gov?
	Have you heard about our new $100 bill?
	You know what?
	I guess they're counterfeiting the old 100s already, so they came up with this one, which has got one of those mag stripes on it.
	Well, of course, the minute we have one of these, we've got to see if it has an RFID chip embedded.
	It may.
	It may.
	You don't know.
	But here's the question I have.
	I'm going to go to my bank...
	I'm going to go to my bank tomorrow.
	You know, our bank.
	And I'm going to ask them to get me one of those as soon as they come in.
	So here's a question I have for you.
	Because this newmoney.gov, I looked through the site, and one of the questions I have is, if they print up a whole bunch of new $100 bills, they literally say, you know, we're not taking the old bills out of circulation immediately.
	Oh, no!
	They never do.
	Right.
	But isn't that the equivalent of printing money?
	They are printing money.
	That's what they do.
	But isn't it like printing more money?
	Isn't this an inflationary?
	Bills are always coming out of circulation.
	Right.
	I think the answer to that question was if we're not taking all the old bills to replace them with all the new bills, it's a process where money is taken out of circulation as money is put into circulation.
	Sometimes you put more money in than you take out, which is what your complaint would be.
	Okay, let's play a couple of clips here.
	You're not answering my question, but thanks anyway.
	I'm not going to answer it because I don't have an answer for it.
	Here's a couple of interesting things.
	Most of the stuff I have this week is about kind of predicting what's going to be happening in the future in terms of who's going to get screwed.
	We're looking into John's crystal ball.
	Let's listen to this clip called Germany and Goldman Sachs.
	Okay.
	The move is one of the first acts taken by BNLB's new CEO who took office just last week.
	Sylvia Wadver is in Frankfurt.
	She has more details on this.
	And Sylvia, what happened to innocence until proven guilty?
	Let me set this up.
	The Bayern Bank in Bavaria, I guess, dissociated itself from Goldman Sachs after this initial investigation began this week.
	Yeah, which they're not the only ones to do that.
	They're not the only ones, but then it turns out this woman who's an analyst for CNBC World...
	She says that it looks as though, you'll hear it, that Germany as a whole may dissociate.
	But I'm thinking, Goldman Sachs is so, you know, it's like the octopus at this point in time.
	Their tentacles are everywhere.
	I'm predicting, and you'll listen to the rest of the clip, but I'm predicting that Germany is going to get screwed if they pull this stunt.
	Okay, and yes, I have some thoughts on that.
	Let's listen to the rest of the clip.
	Well, I think as far as banking is concerned, it's a very tricky situation.
	I talked to somebody from the Bavarian Finance Ministry last night and...
	Is this that kind of weirdly hot chick with a blonde hair with a weird part in the middle?
	No, just the opposite.
	You know who I'm talking about though, right?
	Yeah, no, this is not her.
	I like her.
	She has like that weird...
	She's your style.
	Yes, it looks like she's from the spaceship.
	She's a tall blonde.
	Okay, that's not her.
	Good.
	Asked because the state of Bavaria, of course, is a major shareholder and he said quite clearly, he said, look, banking is built on trust.
	If you don't trust your bankers anymore, then you have to take a step back.
	And I think in the case of Bayern LB, it might be even more politically motivated than anywhere else.
	Because we know that with their backs against the wall, they had to be bailed out several times.
	Goldman Sachs was their investment advisor for detoxicating toxic assets for two years.
	And at the moment, they're thinking, hmm, maybe they were not the right advisors for that.
	So I think on a political scale, that's the right decision.
	But...
	The bigger one is the one that might be coming up yet.
	It says whether or not the German government will decide to kick Goldman out of the Bundesanleihe-Konsortium.
	That's the consortium that places federal government paper.
	We're talking about really big money.
	We're talking about big prestige.
	Goldman has been on there for years.
	And I can only quote one of the finance senators of Berlin who said, and I have to quote this because they're It has to be clear.
	How those investment bankers of Goldman Sachs are behaving in business relations raises serious doubt whether they are earnest businessmen.
	Judged by the personal experience with Goldman Sachs in the last months, I intend, if possible, not to do any business with them anymore.
	That's Ulrich Nussbaum, the Finance Senator of Berlin.
	And people like that sit in the Capital Marktausschuss that decides who will issue German government paper.
	So before we go into analyzing this, John, almost exactly the same report in the Volkskrant and Gitmo Nation lowlands, Minister of Finance says, you know what?
	Yeah, these Goldman guys, they basically are the transaction agent for all of our national paper.
	In other words, the debt.
	So Goldman's completely all over the Netherlands as well.
	And exactly the same words.
	Well, we can do without Goldman.
	We can figure out someone else.
	We can get somebody else.
	Do you think that this is a hit on Goldman?
	This seems so unbelievable that, as you say, Goldman is everywhere.
	In fact, the Dutch prince, Johan Friesel, Who is married to one of George Soros' top lieutenants, Mabel Vissa Smith.
	Now, of course, her last name is different, but people will know her by that name.
	He worked at Goldman for four or five years.
	I mean, they're everywhere.
	So what is going on here?
	I mean, are they really trying to take it out or find a guy to blame it on because it's all coming down anyway?
	I don't know for sure, but it could be Lehman Brothers, ex-Lehman Brothers people for all we know behind it.
	Because they're the ones that have the biggest complaint with Goldman.
	And Lehman was just in front of the Congress, I think it was in the last week or so, because I kept seeing the CEO of Lehman trying to explain what happened.
	Could this not be at a higher level?
	Well, it could be on some government level.
	How about Rothschild level?
	I don't know.
	I think they'd be in bed with Goldman, if anything.
	The whole thing, there's something suspicious about it, and I honestly believe that somehow Obama's involved with this in some screwy way.
	Play the Obama on Goldman.
	This kind of took me by surprise.
	Oh, this is where the White House is saying, We don't know nothing.
	By the way, he's looking around very peculiarly.
	This is a blatant lie as far as I can tell.
	The first on CNBC and a thank you to Carolyn who joined us in that interview from Zurich.
	Now President Obama has told CNBC that his administration was not tipped off about the legal action engulfing Goldman Sachs.
	Speaking exclusively to CNBC's John Harwood yesterday, he in fact said the first he heard about the SEC's fraud charges against the bank was on this channel.
	The SEC is an entirely independent agency that we have no day-to-day control over, and they never discussed with us anything with respect to the charts that would be brought.
	So this notion that somehow there would be any attempt to interfere in an independent agency is completely false.
	So you could say categorically, no winks, no heads up in advance, no signal from anyone.
	Categorically.
	We found out about it on CNBC. You know, whenever someone says categorically, you know they're lying.
	They're lying.
	But here's the thing.
	Unfortunately, this particular lie I don't think makes Obama look that good.
	Because are you telling...
	Here, let's take a look at this from another perspective.
	Are you telling me that the White House is so out of touch with its own agencies or the agencies of the U.S. government who they do communicate with?
	Yeah, it's an independent agency.
	Yeah, they don't manage it, but they put everybody in place.
	It's a government property.
	Are you telling me that the White House of this country is so out of touch with what's going on around it that something as important as this and that people at the SEC aren't stupid.
	They know that Goldman's in the midst of everything.
	You're telling me that nobody told them about this?
	They had no communications and they only found out about it on CNBC? So in other words, it was released to the press before the government itself knew?
	Is that how...
	Isolated these people are?
	I mean, what is the subtext of this message?
	It's ridiculous.
	Well, I have some context to that from former President Bill Clinton, who was on ABC and was asked about, because we know that the derivatives started during his administration.
	It was completely deregulated.
	He definitely had contact with the SEC. In fact, he's saying, this is a crappy SEC. You want to hear my clip?
	Sure.
	You mentioned financial regulatory reform.
	By the way, financial regulatory reform, which is now President Obama's new health care, this is his new mission because we have to have it because there's all kinds of little tricks in there to help his buddies out.
	Just go ahead and read it.
	There's all kinds of groovy stuff in there.
	This was even his presidential address, his weekly radio YouTube thingy.
	The things that President Obama is pushing for is regulation of derivatives, and also with a thing called the Volcker Rule, he's trying to separate commercial banking.
	So the president is starting this reform, and then the SEC goes after Goldman Sachs.
	Oh, really?
	Coincidence?
	I think not!
	...
	from investment banking interests.
	These were things that were the opposite policies of Treasury Secretary Rubin and Summers at the time.
	Do you think, in retrospect, they gave you bad advice on those issues?
	Well, I think on the derivatives.
	Before the Glass-Steagall Act was repealed, It had been breached.
	There was already a total merger, practically, of commercial and investment banking.
	And really...
	This is a revelation for me to hear this.
	This is also bullshit, but I'll go on.
	Well, I have to say that Glass-Steagall was breached and everyone knew it.
	It was like, we always like, oh, it's the shop.
	All they had to do was just say, hey, wait a minute, and they could have pushed the laws that were within Glass-Steagall if it was breached...
	And it was going to continue to be breached.
	Why would you go out of your way to repeal it?
	But the big joke is everyone knew it.
	It was always wink, wink, nudge, nudge.
	Yeah, Chinese wall.
	Yeah, we know what you're saying.
	Because I was around all this in the 90s when the dot-com boom was exploding and all these companies were going public.
	And I went, oh, that's the Chinese wall.
	The analysts can't talk to that guy.
	Wink, wink, nudge, nudge.
	By the way, Clinton looks like he's on the brink of death in this interview.
	He doesn't look good.
	He looks bad.
	What I did was to give us some power to regulate it, the repeal, and also to give old-fashioned traditional banks in all over America the right to take an investment interest if they wanted to forestall bankruptcies.
	Sadly, none of them did that.
	Mostly it was just the continued blurring of the lines.
	But only about a third of all the money loaned today is loaned to traditional banking channels, and that was well underway before that legislation was signed.
	So I don't feel the same way about that.
	I think what happened was the SEC and the whole regulatory apparatus after I left office was just let go.
	So he's saying, oh, this new SEC blows, is what he's saying.
	There was an interesting thing that happened this past week, which is not covered by anybody except the right-wing talk show guys, and mainly Rush Limbaugh.
	And what it was is a commentary that was done by Dick Morris.
	I think it was on Fox, I believe.
	It was probably on O'Reilly.
	Oh, I have it.
	I have the clip.
	Hold on a second.
	It's just the one where he talks about Clinton?
	About Waco?
	Yeah.
	Yeah, you want to hear that?
	Play it, then I want to talk about what Limbaugh said.
	Okay, here it comes.
	This is an amazing revelation.
	Oh, yeah.
	Let's understand what was Timothy McVeigh's motivation.
	God knows what's going on in that crazy head of his, but there is some speculation that he himself had said that it was the reaction to the Waco takeover, and Bill Clinton orchestrated that takeover, and in fact was so ashamed about what he did in Waco that he was not going to appoint Janet Reno to a second four-year term.
	And she told him in a meeting right before the inauguration day for his new term that if you don't appoint me, I'm going to tell the truth about Waco.
	And that forced Clinton's hand in reappointing her.
	I don't remember you telling this story before.
	I think that President Clinton might want to examine his own connection with the Oklahoma City bombing in terms of Waco before he starts accusing people in walkers and wheelchairs who are trying to keep their Medicare of being provocateurs.
	So what was the truth about Waco that Reno threatened to use against him?
	I have no idea, but I know that he told me, Clinton told me, that I couldn't not appoint Reno because she would have turned on me over Waco.
	That's the phrase he used.
	Okay, so Limbaugh, that was Hannity's show, I guess.
	So Limbaugh picked this up and dug into Clinton's My Life, which, of course, he derisively calls My Lies by Clinton's biography.
	And Clinton in the biography not only throws Reno under the bus, claiming that it was all her responsibility.
	And by the way, this does make sense because I always thought that after Waco and Ruby Ridge, which people should definitely read about.
	And there's a good rundown in the most recent wiki entry.
	Wiki entry is quite good on Ruby Ridge and the basic murdering of American citizens on American soil.
	With no accountability, apparently.
	After those two events, which were under Janet Reno's rule, I thought she wasn't going to get reappointed.
	So it's obvious that...
	She had something on him.
	She had something on him.
	And what it was is that he may have been responsible for orchestrating, as Dick Morris said, the entire Waco incident.
	And he was embarrassed about it.
	So Limbaugh brought out the book and started reading from his bio what Clinton had to say about it.
	And it was quite funny because it's mostly weasel word.
	So I was all against it.
	I didn't even know they were going to do this.
	And I was going to take full responsibility, though, because I was the commander.
	Oh, dude, he does the same thing in this financial clip.
	I take responsibility.
	So he says I was going to take full responsibility for this, but Stephanopoulos talked me out of it.
	Reno came up to me.
	She says, don't worry, Mr.
	President.
	It's my fault anyway.
	It's my fault for screwing up.
	So I will take full responsibility.
	And Clinton says in his biography, no, no, no, Janet.
	I'll take responsibility because I'm the president.
	And then Stephanopoulos and one other president.
	One other of his minions said, no, Mr.
	President, you can't do that because you shouldn't do that.
	It's not a good idea.
	And so then Clinton says, against my better judgment, I agreed with them.
	Former President Bill Clinton on Friday said, and I'm reading from Politico, that legitimate comparisons can be drawn between today's grassroots anger and resentment toward the government and the right-wing extremism that bubbled up prior to the bombing of the Edward Murrow building in Oklahoma City.
	I mean, what kind of setup is this?
	Well, of course, this Tea Party thing is getting on their nerves, okay?
	And the setup is the following.
	First, you've got to demonize them.
	They're a bunch of old retirees.
	People in wheelchairs, yeah.
	You've got to demonize them, and then you've got to do what all the good politicians do.
	If you've got us plant agent provocateurs, agent provocateurs within the organization, the ones that carry the weird signs, the one that use the N-word, you just bring them in as though they were members.
	And then they infiltrate and then they embarrass the whole group and then the whole thing falls apart when people say, these people are terrible.
	They're a bunch of racists.
	And that's what you hear from Rachel Maddow and Olbermann and all these guys because they'll get on that bed as fast as they can.
	Bill Maher.
	Bill Maher.
	Bill Maher for sure.
	Here's the quote from the president.
	I wish I had audio because he apparently is listening to this very show.
	What we learn from Oklahoma City is not that we should gag each other or that we should hold less passion for the positions we hold, but that our words really do matter.
	There's a vast echo chamber, and the words fall on the serious and delirious alike.
	Have at it.
	Go fight.
	Do whatever you want.
	You don't have to be nice, but be careful with what you say.
	And do not advocate violence.
	Oh, I just gotta play it.
	Yeah!
	Word!
	Come on, everybody!
	Order!
	Say it with me now Shut up, slave So in the meantime, MSNBC cobbled together a special on the Tim McVeigh tapes, which I guess were released.
	And I don't even know how these are edited.
	We don't know anything about it.
	These are the phone calls?
	I don't know if these are phone calls or...
	I don't think these are phone calls from the compound.
	I don't know.
	I don't know what these tapes are.
	There were tapes that were made as a debriefing.
	Somebody got to interview them or something.
	They've been kept forever and now they've been released.
	Until it was handy to release them to demonize people.
	Right.
	Yeah, and McVeigh, but yeah, but the problem with the left-wingers in this regard, and Rachel Maddow is the voiceover, the narrator, and she's like trying to be really serious, so she doesn't have any of that snipe quality of her voice, and she's actually fair at doing this, but the...
	But they just can't resist.
	There's a checklist, just as with the right-wingers, there's this checklist.
	If you don't do this and this and this and this as a conservative, you're a rhino.
	With the left, they've got their little agendas that always crop up.
	Now, I want you to play this clip.
	Now, this clip runs about three minutes, and you can interrupt it at any given time.
	But when the mean comes up...
	Uh-huh.
	I want you to identify it immediately because it's going to be like, oh brother!
	How did they get this into here?
	How did you get this meme, which we've discussed over the past few weeks, the meme is a live one.
	That's interesting, they'd slip this in.
	So this is more newspeak of the week, I guess.
	No, no, it's just a meme.
	Just a plain old meme.
	Alright, here we go.
	And the music is just ridiculous.
	I can't wait for Rachel.
	Tim was born into a working class family just north of Buffalo, New York.
	It's a hard-working community of blue-collar folks.
	His father, his grandfather worked at an auto plant.
	The family he was born into was very typical American.
	Timothy McVeigh was the first son in that family.
	He'd had an older sister, and then later a younger sister came along.
	My family, even getting a speeding ticket was like a sin type thing.
	You know, it wasn't this religious thing.
	I don't want to say sin in a religious tone.
	I mean like any breaking of the law is bad, Tim.
	You should never break the law.
	An energetic, generally happy kid, McVeigh did not see too much of that joy inside his own home.
	I love Rachel's voiceover.
	It's really impressive with the music.
	Parents Bill and Mickey were constantly at odds with one another.
	His parents didn't mesh together very well.
	Mickey, I think she wanted something bigger, something better, and just wanted to be free.
	The sisters and Tim were put in a very difficult situation when the family broke up.
	The sisters decided to go with the mom, and she moved down to Florida.
	And Tim said, no, I'm staying with Dad.
	With my parents, being completely honest, I can't sit here today and tell you that I truly love them.
	I know what love is, and I don't think I feel it to my parents.
	You asked if there's any men that I loved.
	I loved my grandfather McVeigh.
	Ed McVeigh lived just a mile or so down the road and became a role model and constant presence in young McVeigh's life once his mother and sisters moved away.
	Ed did a lot of child rearing with Tim.
	And thank God Ed was there because he would have had no one.
	He would go shooting with his grandfather.
	He did everything with his grandfather.
	In contrast to the safe haven he found with his grandfather, McVeigh struggled with the social pressures of high school.
	Oh!
	Oh!
	Was he bullied?
	Was he bullied?
	Oh, I can't wait!
	Highly intelligent by all accounts, McVeigh's problems were not in the classroom.
	I think they started calling me Noodle McVeigh.
	Oh, yeah.
	Because I was thin as a noodle, right?
	And a lanky and all that.
	So then they started, well, noodle, chicken noodle soup...
	Chicken McNuggets.
	McVay McNuggets.
	Chicken McNuggets.
	He got picked on.
	And that was one of the resentments that he had throughout his entire life.
	Bullies.
	I got bullied, so I'm going to be radical and blow up children.
	I can't even listen to this anymore.
	It doesn't get any better.
	You can stop it there.
	It's unbelievable.
	But he doesn't blame the jocks, which I thought was interesting.
	Well, screw them.
	The jocks.
	Wow, bullying.
	Well, you know...
	Can't get away.
	The people on this side of the aisle, they just can't get off this bullying thing.
	Well, I'll say it again.
	This was a huge thing a couple years back in Gitmo Nation East when I was living in London.
	And there was another report.
	Christina, my daughter, is here still with us.
	We were watching something else on the news and it was about this girl who committed suicide because she was bullied.
	And I watched Christina and I watched her reaction to this.
	And these kids have really been indoctrinated with this bullying stuff, you know?
	And she's like, wow, yeah, this bullying's out of control.
	Look at how horrible this is.
	So it's working.
	It's working on a very deep sociological or psychological level.
	Because, of course, everyone gets bullied at school.
	At some point, everyone gets some bullying.
	There's a pecking order in school and you have this...
	Yeah, it's like life.
	It's like the way it is.
	You get bullied.
	This is what bothers me.
	I'm concerned about people that grow up isolated from this and then they go into the real world where they get bullied by a mad off or a salesperson.
	You know, I've been getting nothing but phone calls from all these sales...
	Because I got on some list and somebody finally told me who put the list up.
	So tell it...
	Tell a marketing list for apparently people who are stupid enough to buy securities over the phone from somebody you don't know.
	And these guys, they have a hard sell.
	I usually jump on their case, especially with the one sales pitch I really find annoying, which is, would you agree with me that blah, blah, blah?
	Would you agree with me that blah, blah, blah?
	Would you agree with me that...
	So they get you in an agreeable mood.
	Anytime anyone says, would you agree with me, I immediately say, no, I'm not going to agree with anything you say.
	And so, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, it really screws them up.
	But anyway...
	Well, I think I can take this one step further.
	I see the direction where this is going.
	Our previous show, actually, the title, I think, was Bully for You.
	I don't know if that was the previous show or the one before that, because this is a very, you're right, a very active meme.
	It's going one step further, because what do bullies do?
	What do bullies do when they need to strike back and get rid of all of that anger?
	Well, they become terrorists on the internet.
	Listen to Kathleen Parker, Pulitzer Prize winning journalist from the Washington Post, who is now a member of the Face the Nation team.
	Listen to what she says.
	Someone made an interesting point to me recently in talking about how, you know, some of this really nasty rhetoric that shows up on the Internet.
	Yeah.
	Where you don't know who said it.
	There really is no accountability.
	The Internet being the only place, the only vehicle to deliver news that has no editor.
	You don't know where this stuff comes from, whether it's true or false.
	And this person said to me, you know, we've always had...
	Listen to what she says.
	Opinion that comes from various places, like during Lincoln's day, every newspaper had an editorial point of view, but this person said the difference was, in those days, you knew which paper it was coming from.
	Now you don't know where some of this is coming from, and that is the added factor to the volatility of this stuff.
	Yeah, it's interesting.
	People will say anything when they have the cloak of anonymity.
	It's sort of like terrorism.
	You know, we don't know where to aim our...
	No, listen.
	It gets better.
	It gets better.
	It's just like the cloak of terrorism.
	Listen.
	...of anonymity.
	It's sort of like terrorism.
	You know, we don't know where to aim our bombs.
	We don't know where to aim our bombs or these inanimate terrorists.
	You can't go after a country because there's no one place to focus on, and it's the same thing with the Internet.
	You don't know who to go after, and you and I, I'm sure, you share some of the wonderful experiences I've had of being attacked and threatened and whatnot.
	And bullied.
	It sort of feeds on itself, you know, builds, and people who are not well-grounded and who may have these more violent tendencies suddenly find a place where they can convene and find validation and even find company.
	Convene.
	Oh, we're coming together.
	You're on a message board, biatch.
	I don't know where that all leads, but it's kind of scary.
	Oh, it's kind of scary.
	Scary!
	It's so scary!
	What's scary, John, is we have missed our mark.
	We've got to talk about some support here.
	Can I just say, this particular episode of No Agenda...
	It has been flowing very nicely.
	Our clips are complimentary.
	It's like we had a meeting.
	You actually have clips.
	It's like we had a meeting, almost.
	It is.
	And I can assure any listener out there, we did not have a meeting.
	We did not have a meeting.
	Let me just thank you.
	We do a lot of one-upsmanship on the show.
	The show is actually a free-form conversation between two people, which makes it a little unique.
	And we don't plan...
	But the thing is, it's at some point, and I think listeners get to this point too, where you see this stuff coming down Broadway.
	I mean, it's the obvious story of the week.
	There's the obvious real news, which we'll get to after we thank some people for giving us some help with their contributions.
	And so what we don't do is we don't take advertisements...
	Because we can't.
	A, because we would have had to interrupt the flow that we just had for the past hour and ten minutes.
	We would have had to interrupt it six times.
	Well, we'll be right back.
	I know you're really into the story.
	I know you're having a lot of fun listening to that Rachel Manow clip about bullying, but we'll be right back.
	Well, don't...
	Hey, stay tuned, everybody!
	In the morning!
	We'll be right back!
	So, we hate doing that.
	And, of course, we couldn't talk about half the stuff we talk about.
	Yeah, and the other thing is it's an overhead issue.
	It's a pain in the ass to track it all.
	Besides that, you have to hire people.
	You have to have salespeople.
	I mean, to do advertising right, I mean, to do it slipshod, yeah, we could probably get some advertisers once in a while because we meet them someplace.
	But to do it right, you need a full-time staff of salespeople.
	And it would ruin the show.
	It would ruin our attitudes.
	We'd rather spend time working on the stories than managing some sales geek.
	Hey, what's your pipeline like?
	I don't know.
	Where's your sales report for this week?
	I mean, you got any TPS reports for me?
	And we also believe that people who enjoy the show or get something out of it or use it for their commute entertainment hour, they are supporting the show directly.
	We're getting direct support from people.
	We're showing that it's a new business model.
	I actually may take this model over to DH Unplugged.
	What are you talking about?
	I think we're going to ask for money, I think, for Horowitz's show.
	You...
	You whore!
	You ignorant slut!
	You're the one who told me that this...
	And I believe...
	I thought you were...
	Well, hold on a second.
	But I do the daily source code to contribute to the stream.
	Now you're going to enrich Horowitz?
	Well, let me think.
	We'll talk about that.
	Enrich is a big word, by the way.
	Yeah, enrich.
	Enrich.
	It's like, you know, it's like what's he got in his wallet as we speak.
	But the point is, you made the point that the...
	That this model is probably the model of the future for this type of broadcasting.
	Yes, it is.
	It's direct support.
	If you don't like the show, you don't have to give us any money.
	A lot of people like the show and they don't give us any money.
	We assume that's always going to be in the mix.
	But if support completely dried up, which it hasn't, but if it did, that would be an indication that we're doing the wrong thing.
	We should get off the air.
	And we would.
	Because we have to go get a job.
	So that's the reason for direct support.
	Anyway, Tom Derry, Officer Tom Derry, who was apparently a policeman, gave us $182 with some calculation, which I'm not absolutely sure means anything.
	But he says, as a cop patrolling at night, your show helps me to keep awake.
	Good.
	I'm very happy about that.
	Yes.
	Excellent.
	We need more police listening to this show.
	Mark, okay, here we go.
	A guy in Antwerp.
	Now, you can know this guy because you pronounce his name the same way as a famous Dutch soccer hero.
	Does that give you a clue?
	Come on, you know this guy.
	He was in the 70s.
	He was huge.
	Krujith.
	Krauf.
	Mark Krauf.
	You might say in Dutch or in American, you'd say Kroif.
	Kroif.
	Krujith.
	was a famous game of 69 bucks he's got enough attention okay he says yet another Dutch name he can't pronounce John so he then he's put something in Dutch which obviously what does he say there Blast you the hope to both and at my Okay.
	So this is a famous Dutch proverb, which goes something like this.
	The blades of grass that grow above the rest always get cut off.
	Oh, yeah.
	Yeah, the Japanese think this, too.
	So he's saying, keep sticking your head up.
	Ha, ha, ha, ha.
	Oh, that hurt.
	Yeah, but that's the problem with the Nordic and Scandinavian countries.
	They all have this notion.
	They have nothing but trouble marketing things because of that.
	They won't, oh, I don't want to do an advertisement because, my God, I think it'll get my head cut off because I'm an hour-bladed grass.
	I think it's a part of the Calvinist thing.
	I don't know what it's part of, but it's very secure as a cultural icon within that community, in that area.
	Carlos Sanchez, Chicago, Illinois, 6666.
	Go ahead, John.
	Okay, Carlos Sanchez wants to wish a happy birthday to his son.
	His son's first birthday, and yesterday was my wife's 32nd.
	Keep up the good work.
	He says he's no longer a douchebag because he's been listening to the show forever.
	There you go.
	His wife, Anita, and son, Kai.
	It's your birthday.
	We actually had a lot of birthdays today.
	Roland Boulder.
	Is that pronounced right?
	Boulder?
	Boulder.
	Boulder?
	B-U-L-D-E-R is builder?
	Boulder.
	Bull.
	Bull.
	Boulder.
	$62.
	Eric Newworth, Fresno.
	Two nickels on the dime.
	He wants to promote his healthcare podcast.
	He does a deconstruction.
	It's InfectedShow.com.
	Check it out when you get a chance.
	InfectedShow.com.
	I haven't looked at it.
	Kyle Kubas, Swanton, Vermont.
	He's donating on behalf of his brother Casey for his birthday.
	Oh, sorry.
	Hey!
	On no agenda!
	And Kyle calls himself a douchebag.
	And now Mac Davidson, Brown Island, British Columbia, two nickels on the dime, 5510.
	On his birthday, Saturday, he was listening to the show in his headphones, and he cut himself.
	Yeah, that's really good.
	It's your birthday, yeah.
	I don't know why.
	He has surgery.
	This is not funny.
	He has that surgery.
	Yeah, he cut himself while listening to the show, which I think was...
	Then he gave us the 5510s.
	His hand was spurting blood, but he did not stop listening to the show.
	Well, there you have it.
	I think that's it in a nutshell.
	Jeffrey Wolf, Marquette.
	Great.
	Marquette, Michigan.
	David Burneff, Raleigh, North Carolina.
	One of the finest states in the country.
	I always have to mention that.
	Let's see.
	We also have David Hollis, Morewell, Australia, with a very long message.
	Well, yeah, we got a lot of 420 donations, actually $4.20.
	I expected at least one person to do $420, which of course is the code for marijuana.
	So a lot of people did 420, and a lot of people said happy 420.
	And he says, the world would be a better place if people smoked pot and listened to no agenda.
	Yeah, that's what I want on my tombstone.
	And, you know, he also set up a proxy at noagendapodcast.appspot.com.
	Ooh, cool.
	I did that.
	Noagenda podcast.
	We'll put these two proxy servers in the show notes.
	Let me do that right now.
	Show notes.
	Okay.
	And we appreciate people doing that, by the way.
	Jason Fenwick, Arlington, Virginia.
	Keep up the good work, he says.
	Ricky Pierce, Sydney, New South Wales.
	Rodney Lewis, Chelmsford, Essex.
	And then we have a bunch of...
	Those are $50 each.
	And then some knighthood layaways are still here.
	John Kelly and Edgecombe.
	John Edgecombe.
	Let's see.
	Brian Curry and Jeffrey Glennon.
	And that wraps up, that was a pretty good group of people.
	Yeah, actually, so let's...
	I do have a couple of notes here that I have to read.
	Yeah, for our executive producers, right?
	Well, you know...
	Yes, we do.
	Yeah, we've got that, but let me get these other ones out of the way.
	David Koss is playing some pinball number 3D court game or something.
	I don't know what the Anabum Sesame Street contest is.
	Now, hold on a second.
	This is important.
	I have it here.
	David Koss, he donated $200.
	He says, please ask everyone to vote for my pinball number count 3D animation, which is in a Sesame Street contest.
	It's actually pretty cool.
	I looked at it.
	It teaches kids how to count.
	If I win the cash prize, I will immediately finish off my knighthood, and the feature will be played on Sesame Street, which, of course, I do hope you put a little secret in the morning in that somewhere.
	I didn't catch it, but that would have been really cool if that could be on Sesame Street.
	You can go to pinballnumbercount.com.
	Pinballnumbercount.com.
	And David, maybe you can, when they ask you for the, when you win, which you undoubtedly will now, when you give them the high res file, maybe you can slip in a little, you know, noagendashow.com or an in the morning or something into the animation and get that into kids' heads.
	Heh heh.
	Heh heh heh.
	That's what we're trying to do.
	Uh-huh.
	And then we have the one other message which you have, I think?
	Yeah, I got a couple messages.
	Oh, actually, we have, oh my gosh, it's unbelievable today.
	So we have a couple of associate executive producers and Simon Ox, uh, Ox to be.
	Am I doing this right in the right place?
	Yeah.
	He donated $240, and he wants to say happy birthday to his father, who also listens to the show.
	Dale.
	Happy birthday, Dale.
	Yeah, Dale.
	I don't want to say anything disparaging, but April 21st is Hitler's birthday.
	I don't know if that means anything to anyone.
	Well, that was yesterday.
	And that's also Carmen Electra's birthday.
	Does that...
	Yeah, that tells you something.
	Okay, then we have...
	Okay, Margaret George, Dame Margaret.
	Thanks for the relevant current info.
	I'm okay with the guys, and we already talked about her donation being the executive producer, and then the other associate executive producers, ESC Inc., along with Simon Oxtoby and Edward...
	Edward, I'll just say, Beerthausen.
	And then we have a black night today.
	Yes.
	Which is a pretty...
	A black night, of course, is a night that snuck up on us.
	Actually, we have Eric the Shill who's going to reach out to a lot of people because we think we have more black nights.
	And he's trying to administer all this stuff, so he's going to be figuring out if we've missed other people.
	So, John, why don't we unsheathe here for a moment?
	Do you have your sword?
	Yeah, there it is.
	There it is.
	Okay.
	Scott Rodriguez!
	Kneel before us!
	As we now pronounce you, Sir Scott Rodriguez, Knight of the No Agenda Roundtable, please join the table and enjoy the hookers and blow.
	And welcome to the knighthood, my friend.
	And as a last thing, I want to mention Robert Campbell is still trying to sell his timeshare, and you can go to onthecircle.squarespace.com if you're interested in moving to Orlando.
	Actually, two more.
	Andy Prowse from Ontario donated $66.
	Just wanted to say, when the Polish president's plane went down, my wife called bullshit on that.
	She actually said they took him out.
	For that alone, you get a one-time 6666, the double the magic number.
	And he's signing up for the $5 a month plan, which we really appreciate.
	This is what, in some date in the future, will sustain us.
	And then the Karma Club got an amazing one in from Sylvain.
	First he said, just did my second of my three donations.
	I know it's not much, but it's what I can do right now.
	Yesterday, I went to a restaurant with my young boy.
	On the receipt, it was stated we were sitting at table number six.
	The receipt number was 166666.
	Though I saw I should give my second donation, make it 6666.
	Who knows?
	That number six thing may bring me luck.
	The reason why I'm doing this, my girlfriend and I are the second couple to place an offer on our house.
	We'll probably know tonight if the first offer is dropped and we get the house.
	And lo and behold, after his second donation, we did it!
	They got the house.
	It's not a hilltop crackpot command center, but a nice 1872 story brick house by the river, and the first people dropped out after he made his wish.
	I think we need to collect these stories.
	We need a website, No Agenda Karma.
	Someone else needs to be doing that, though.
	Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
	Somebody will be glad to do it.
	And no agenda karma or something like that.
	And it would be like an open posting, like a drop bio or something like that.
	People would just put in these stories.
	An excellent idea.
	All right.
	There's probably a few notes we missed, but we'll get to you next week.
	No, I think we did pretty good.
	And we spent a lot of the show on the...
	The third show would just be...
	Yeah, the special The Deuce Club show will just be thanking everybody we missed.
	So talking about, let's see what else we didn't miss here on the clips.
	So we're done with talking about some of this corruption.
	Let's see what else we got.
	By the way, there's another, like I said, I want to look into the future a little bit.
	I have one that's just a pure informational post.
	It's the Burma Post.
	Just play this and this will be something that we'll be dealing with in the future.
	For what purpose does the gentleman from California rise?
	I ask permission to address the house for five minutes to revise and extend my remarks.
	Without objection.
	Thank you very much.
	Mr.
	Speaker, I rise to draw attention to the ongoing plight of the people of Burma, now referred to as Miramar.
	Shortly after the Second World War, Burma was granted its independence from Great Britain.
	With democratic institutions in place, rich natural resources, and an educated population, it was expected that Burma would become a wealthy, stable, And free country.
	Sadly, that country with so much potential has been dominated by corrupt tyrants and despite its vast natural wealth, its people suffer in abject poverty.
	Even worse, the people of Burma are actually losing their country to a foreign power.
	A Chinese power grab is not only depleting and stealing Burma's natural resources, but slowly and surely, Burma is being turned into a subservient province of Beijing.
	China...
	You know what we need there in Burma?
	We need another good earthquake.
	Something.
	Yeah.
	Yeah.
	Natural resources.
	Heroin.
	Heroin.
	Opium.
	You've got a lot of resources in Burma.
	Anyway, Burma's being taken over and nobody cares.
	So, you know, the Chinese are all over the place.
	Because they're building, building, building.
	They're going crazy over there.
	That's why I tell people just to take a quick trip to Shanghai and then open your eyes.
	I mean, you've got to see it to believe it.
	You have no idea.
	I mean, it's beyond...
	It's like going to Mars when you go to China for the first time.
	Hey, John, we've got to talk about the salt thing, man.
	You've been following this?
	Yeah, they're trying to regulate salt.
	We talked about this weeks ago.
	You know what?
	I should probably do the jingle.
	We told you still.
	No, I should.
	That this was happening in New York restaurants.
	And now the FDA received a recommendation from the IOM, which looks like a pretty legit organization, although I haven't really gotten into the nuts and bolts of it.
	It's the, what do you call it, what is this, Institute of Medicine?
	I've never heard of it before now.
	They've been around for a really long time.
	As I said, I did look into the Institute of Medicine.
	This is one of these websites where they list their board members, but they don't really have bios.
	I just didn't have the time, frankly, to figure it out.
	I'm sure there's all kinds of pharma connections on it or something.
	So the IOM, they come out and they say, you know what?
	People are too stupid.
	You're too stupid to regulate your salt intake, so we're going to make some rules about it.
	And the two places where they say salt is used in abundance is in processed foods, which I would have to say arguably is true, and in restaurants, which I would have to say is probably not true.
	Well, it depends on the restaurant.
	Well, of course it does.
	If you count McDonald's as a restaurant, yes, it's true.
	But if you count, you know, Florida Lee in San Francisco as a restaurant, it's not true.
	So, here's the first thing that I question.
	Salt, of course, is blamed for many health issues.
	Has this all been proven?
	Is the science in on this stuff?
	Are we absolutely sure about all of this?
	Well, I have one of my doctor friends who's a salt nut, and he thinks that salt is the evilest thing ever invented, and it's killing everyone.
	Other people are questioning whether this is accurate or not.
	I don't know.
	I don't think that science is in.
	But obviously, there's enough of this.
	You don't have to have the science to be totally in anymore.
	You just say it is.
	Yeah, you just say it's in.
	And then again, this thing pops up about PepsiCo.
	This thing really kills me.
	They have modified the shape of the sodium chloride crystals.
	Oh yeah, right.
	This sounds like a bogus thing here.
	This is funny because this was a story I wanted to talk about probably almost a month ago because they came up with this...
	There's like a big thing going on now about...
	Which I think, by the way, may be behind a lot of this.
	Because if you're the one making the product with the special salt, you can slam the competition.
	But the potato chip makers worked on...
	I think Frito or one of them worked on...
	That's Lay's, which is owned by PepsiCo.
	Okay, so that's where this comes...
	So what they've done is instead of using...
	They did a bunch of studies.
	First of all, that when you have a potato chip...
	It's not only the saltiness of the chip that makes you want to eat more of them, because, you know, there's apparently a tongue feel for the salt crystal itself.
	So, you know, because they powdered salt to a fine dust, and then they could get the same saltiness, because most of the salt you swallow in the crystalline form, you're not really tasting it.
	So you're just swallowing chunks of salt that aren't adding to the salt pleasure.
	So if they powdered it...
	You could get less salt on there.
	This is crazy, but this is the way it goes.
	You get less salt on the chip.
	Your total sodium intake could be cut by half, but the chips would still maintain the saltiness that you want for the chips.
	But, apparently, culturally, that bite, that little crunch, and cooks and chefs who make salads, and you're a good home cook, and you use Florida cell and some of these big chunks of salt.
	You put these Florida cell...
	Sea salt.
	You know, you crunch it.
	What is your bite?
	And you eat and it's got crunch, crunch.
	And it has a certain kind of pleasure you can't fully define.
	So anyway, I think what they're trying to do is develop sort of a hollow salt crystal that still has a crunch, but there's no salt there, as a process to make, you know, to get your sodium intake down.
	You know, I'm just waiting for, where is the aspartame version of salt?
	That's got to be on the horizon, there's no doubt about it.
	So far, no one has done it, right?
	I don't think it's doable.
	I think that's why.
	I think all you can do is screw around with the salt crystal with some of these processes and get it so an actual salt crystal has half as much sodium because it's half air or it's bubbled or it's foamed up somehow.
	I don't know.
	All I know is that this is like...
	This is all part of the processed food industry.
	I think if it wasn't for these guys, the potato chip makers, mainly salting the crap out of their stuff, I think this wouldn't even be an issue.
	I think it's the mountain out of a mohill.
	Shouldn't we be educating people more about food in general?
	No, shut up, slave.
	We're going to change your salt crystals.
	There's been a lot of stories, I noticed, though, that Jamie Oliver has been over here.
	They were tired of him in England.
	So he's come over here to fix our school lunch program.
	Well, Christina said, of course she lives in London, she said that that Jamie Oliver crap, in her perception, is working.
	I think it is to some extent, but I think there's a lot of...
	Stuff that's working.
	I mean, I think that the Gordon Ramsay shows where he's showing people what you should expect from a restaurant, I think educates the public.
	Yeah, that's true.
	I think it does.
	I think people are more aware of what's good and what's bad and how a restaurant should be on the menu and where you should avoid eating.
	And I think Jamie Oliver is also doing a public service with this.
	But it's, you know, it's still entertainment.
	And there was a story that came up recently.
	I can't remember what it was, but it had some...
	I was watching it and I said, this is just a promotion for the...
	You know, it was a news story, but it was like about school lunches or something.
	I think this is a promotion for this TV show.
	Yeah, of course it is.
	You know what's also working?
	What's also working extremely well, John...
	Is the Avatar the movie Mind Control that of course was slipped into your 3D glasses when you were watching it.
	It's working doing what?
	Oh, it's mind controlling you about global warming, about the oceans acidifying, this all being because of carbon emissions, and that we need cap and trade!
	In fact, this morning...
	On CNN AM. See, they knew that we had...
	In the morning!
	...trademarks, so they couldn't do CNN in the morning.
	They had to do CNN AM. Sigourney Weaver is in Washington today, and she will be helping to push through the cap-and-trade bill in its new name.
	Oh, I didn't know she was an environmental expert.
	Oh, John!
	I thought she was an actress.
	Oh, no, John, wait until you hear how much she knows.
	She...
	Oh, John!
	Oh, my God!
	Science!
	The science is in!
	Science!
	She was just in the highest grossing movie of all time trying to preserve the moon Pandora.
	Now actress Sigourney Weaver is trying to help save planet Earth.
	Yay!
	When acidity gets too high, shells dissolve.
	Today we're in a really remarkable history of the ocean.
	So this is a documentary which she worked on.
	In other words, she did the voiceover.
	She's the Rachel Maddow of this documentary.
	It was inexhaustible.
	And by the way, happy Earth Day, John.
	That's what this is all about.
	This is all so coincidental.
	It's Earth Day, and we have the cap-and-trade discussions going on in Washington.
	And there's more coincidences that you will just not believe.
	You couldn't touch it.
	You couldn't harm it.
	In a hundred years, it might be dead.
	Tell us, first of all, for folks at home who might not have heard of this, this is called the other CO2 problem.
	What is ocean acidification?
	Oh, John, it's the other CO2 problem.
	Oh!
	Oh, you're going to love it.
	Hold on.
	Right.
	Well, you know, America loves its oceans.
	We love our ocean sports and fish and sea life, and a large part of our economy comes from oceans.
	And one of the things that scientists have realized as we've increasingly used...
	I thought a large part of our economy came from making war stuff.
	I guess it's from oceans, huh?
	We should bomb the ocean.
	Fossil fuels is that the impact on the oceans, which we didn't know about, is that the carbon dioxide mixing with seawater forms carbonic acid.
	So the ocean is 30% more acidic than it was at the start of the Industrial Revolution.
	Oh, really?
	Where's the data?
	See, she's a scientist now, John.
	Hold on.
	It gets better.
	Unless we curb carbon emissions, which this Congress, you know, is enacting a bill, hopefully, to curb carbon emissions, if we don't do that, within another 50 years, some of our most precious sea life, you know, the whole chain of life that makes shells, we'll be unable to make those shells.
	We can't make shells!
	The sea life can't make shells.
	This is bad.
	I can't collect shells on the beach.
	30% even more acidic than it is.
	By the way, stop.
	The kind of acidity it would take to dissolve a shell like a clam shell.
	If you step foot in the ocean, your foot would just dissolve.
	I mean, give me a break.
	John, she has empirical proof of not just clam shells.
	Oh, no.
	Much more elitist than that.
	Yeah.
	In the clip we saw, and this is from the documentary that you narrated called Acid Test, we saw shells dissolving in ocean conditions expected 90 years from now, about 90 years' time.
	The shells are dissolving, John.
	It's in the documentary.
	It must be true.
	If the current level of CO2 emission goes on, what are the implications for sea life and for people who rely on the oceans for their livelihoods, for food sources?
	And, you know, too, the oceans are a real measure of health of the planet.
	Absolutely.
	Okay, so who relies on the livelihood of the oceans?
	Well, let's listen to this.
	I mean, for all those reasons, scientists and citizens are very concerned.
	We're already seeing the impact.
	We don't need to wait 90 years.
	For instance, the wild oysters off the coast of the northwest of America haven't been able to reproduce in the wild for the last five years.
	John!
	The wild oysters can't reproduce!
	That's up near you.
	I thought you guys ate oysters all the time.
	I do, actually.
	You're depleting the supply.
	They can't reproduce.
	Scientists are pretty sure it's because...
	They're pretty sure.
	They're pretty sure.
	...because of the carbonic acid, the acidification of that area.
	They're already seeing that plankton in Antarctica, their shells are 30% less strong.
	Listen, now she's really going way outside.
	What's she's got to do with plankton?
	Plankton is important.
	She makes it sound like it's a shellfish.
	Yeah, but this is great, because now she's going really...
	So she did the voiceover for this documentary, and she read the script many times as she was reading it, and she remembers this stuff, right?
	She's repeating stuff from the documentary.
	But now she's starting to go a little wild.
	You can hear her stumbling all over the place.
	And when these creatures can't make their shells, they're putting all their energy into making shells instead of reproducing.
	So it will have a huge impact on the whole food chain.
	And certainly it will have a huge impact on all the economies that depend on the ocean for fisheries and tourism and everything else.
	And certainly for our whole heritage as Americans, we come from seafaring stock, a lot of people.
	What?!
	We come from seafaring stock.
	A lot of people.
	And we really depend upon the oceans for quality of life.
	I'm a cowboy, man.
	I don't know nothing about no ocean.
	So let me get this straight.
	So the poor oysters can't make a shell thick enough.
	Yeah.
	No, they can't make shells.
	So, and this is like, I guess, when people are, you know, they have bone, they put their energy into bone making, they can't have sex.
	Yeah.
	They're too busy building the house.
	I know where this logic comes from.
	It comes from the fact that occasionally, if you grow fruit trees, occasionally the tree will decide to put out more foliage than fruit because there wasn't enough pollination, or sometimes it'll do more fruit one year when it didn't do a very good job the year before, and you get this kind of cycle with plants.
	I'm not seeing how the oyster can decide to put its energy into Into making shell, more shell so it can't reproduce at all.
	It's just baffling.
	Well, John, because you're not a scientist.
	The science is in!
	And remember the coincidence that it is Earth Day.
	Sigourney Weaver is in Washington testifying on behalf of the bill that this Congress really wants to push through, which is the new version of cap-and-trade.
	They're not calling it.
	They're calling it the Sigourney Weaver bill, I think.
	I'll tell you the mistake that they made here.
	They should have brought her up there 20 years ago when she was kind of cute.
	Because then, you know, these Congress guys will go for any hottie.
	All right, stand by.
	We come from seafaring stock, a lot of people, and we really depend upon the oceans for quality of life.
	You know, we should mention too, Sigourney, that the film Avatar, which had a very heavy environmental message, is coming out on DVD today.
	Ah!
	Coincidence?
	I think not!
	Did Cameron get funded by the government for this?
	I mean, this is amazing.
	He was involved in some...
	What?
	Well, you know, there were some shady dealings with the guy who found the Titanic and became friends with the cameraman.
	The Titanic guy was working for the CIA. Well, hold on.
	This just gets better.
	It's another minute.
	It just gets better.
	There were some people who were critical of it, thinking that it was too much of an environmental lecture.
	And at the same time as we talk about all of this on this Earth Day, it's interesting to note that more and more people are becoming skeptical of this whole idea of global warming and its effects.
	That's happening.
	You know, I think it's probably fear and denial.
	Don't be in denial!
	Because your science is in!
	Science!
	Oh, I'm so scared!
	I don't want to believe it's true!
	What I found traveling around the world for Avatar is that Everyone around the world is actually aware that our Earth is changing and that we do need to enact legislation to curb the emission of, you know, the use of fossil fuels.
	And it's time really to encourage our Congress to put aside their differences and enact legislation to create a strong green energy economy.
	You know, the science to me is very sure.
	I am science!
	Give her the look.
	What?
	No way, she's almost done.
	50% chance that all these things will come true, I think we need to act.
	Wait, wait, wait.
	Okay, the science is in, but there's a...
	Listen to this.
	We...
	And even if there's only, you know, a 50% chance that all these things will come true, I think we need to act now.
	Make up your mind, lady.
	50% chance.
	Oh, okay.
	How does that jive with the science is in?
	It doesn't.
	The measurements they've done in the oceans, which have seemed for years to be endlessly forgiving of whatever we do to them, it's having a huge impact on the ocean.
	And we're going to see it increasingly.
	And it's going to have an even bigger impact on our estuaries where the freshwater meets the seawater.
	The acidification will have an even stronger impact there on those fisheries and those economies.
	You know, you can sit around arguing a little bit about whether all this is true, but frankly, you know, I've been reading the science for quite a while now, and I'm completely convinced...
	The science is in!
	She's been reading the science.
	The thing that you're overlooking here is the fact that she would say even if it's only a 50% chance shows that doubt has crept into her mind.
	Yeah, of course it has.
	That's why I played it for you.
	Have actually made enough headway to get people even like her, who's obviously kind of an idiot, question some of this stuff enough so that she would say something like that.
	Okay, that's enough of that.
	We've got to get the show over with.
	I think I've got a couple of items I want to get out of the way.
	One, because I know it's going to drive you crazy.
	Oh, please tell me you have another Rachel Manow clip.
	I do, but I'm not going to play that one.
	Okay.
	I want to, first of all, I want to do real news.
	Oh!
	And get all the real news out of the way I want.
	And now, back to real news.
	The real news is, you know, we listen to these teasers that carry all these shows, these entertainment shows, and we've never given a tribute out to the first entertainment news show and still the biggest.
	E.T., which does not have the greatest teasers, but their teaser does tell you the entire show in one long tease, and let's just play that, and it will be done with this type of real news.
	Sean King's lover, the exclusive teller.
	Did you have sex in Larry King's bed?
	Kate Gosselin in tears.
	I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
	You want to cry, baby?
	Her backstage confessions you didn't get to see.
	I had a lot of real, real fears.
	You turned me into a nightmare!
	Does she regret going on dancing?
	And could she become TV's next bachelorette?
	The latest news.
	Are Sandra and Jessie talking in secret to save their marriage?
	Plus, Heather Locklear arrested for a hit and run.
	Tonight on the Tube, a then-pregnant star gives birth in prime time.
	An all-new Robin Hood exclusive, Russell Crowe, Cate Blanchett.
	I found it breathtaking.
	We were first on the set, now our epic new behind-the-scenes.
	It's a gigantic story.
	Now, the most watched entertainment news magazine in the world.
	I think we should start the show off with this, John.
	Every single show we should start...
	Wait, here's kind of how I envision it.
	The idea is something like this.
	It's Crackbot and Buzzkill!
	In the morning!
	Sean King's lover, the exclusive tell-all.
	This is Entertainment Tonight.
	Yeah, I don't necessarily believe that's true.
	Did Larry King watch?
	And all the evidence is gone!
	He was his man.
	We kind of locked eyes.
	We kind of locked eyes and we started kissing.
	So, by the way, Robin Hood movie's coming out.
	They're promoting a lot.
	I have a quick review.
	Gladiator in the Woods.
	Okay, good.
	Baseball coach.
	This baseball coach supposedly had this affair with Larry King's wife.
	He's a little league baseball coach.
	They kind of leave that out.
	By the way, lots of puns you can do with that.
	Yeah.
	Can we get out of this?
	Can we get out of Real News?
	Can we get out of it?
	Yeah, that's the end of it.
	I don't want to talk about Larry King's wife.
	No, neither do I. It's disgusting.
	Now, here's the deal.
	The big story, the big real news story, semi-real news, actually nothing to see here moment, is the South Park episode.
	Oh, yes.
	Oh, yes.
	Where they displayed, apparently they did this before and they never had a problem.
	But now everyone's up in arms about the fact that some Muslims have threatened the South Park people.
	And because they depicted Muhammad as a teddy bear or a dress in a teddy bear costume, which a lot of people noticed, if you really want to get the subtext, was actually...
	The pedo bear.
	It was.
	It was the pedo bear.
	Yeah, it was.
	Totally true.
	So that was a big stink.
	So, and this one is going to drive you crazy.
	Now, you've worked on network and you've been in network situations.
	Even a small network like MSNBC, we're going to talk about the Joy Behar show here.
	You have an IFB in your ear, right?
	Yep.
	Usually somebody's in the control room telling you what to do.
	You have a producer, you have directors, you have writers.
	They're all in the control room, many of them.
	And they're telling you stuff.
	And in this case, she's got three people on the set.
	And Joy Behar says something that will make you crazy.
	And nobody on the entire crew set anywhere corrects her or says anything about it.
	It just goes crazy.
	SPJB? You got it.
	That's tricky.
	You've done this town a huge favor, Muhammad.
	Hold on a second!
	Stop!
	There are some extremists threatening that if we give Muhammad to the celebrities, they're gonna bomb us!
	Now, okay, the Muslim website says, quote, we have to warn Matt Stone and Trey Parker, the creators, that what they are doing is stupid and they will probably end up, listen to this, like Theo Van Gogh for airing this show.
	Theo Van Gogh, really.
	Is this a warning or a threat?
	Theo van Gogh is the cartoonist in Amsterdam, I believe, who was basically assassinated for doing a cartoon against Mohammed.
	I mean, I would take it as a threat because of the fact that Theo is now dead.
	I understand how people could be upset over this, but it's so...
	Is that unbelievable?
	And nobody, the three doofuses that were sitting there with her, none of them knew anything.
	He's a cartoonist.
	Nobody knew anything.
	So Theo Van Gogh is now, to the beholders of this wonderful show, a cartoonist who was assassinated for depicting Muhammad.
	Oh my god.
	Okay, you win.
	You win on this show.
	I know.
	I believe that is the winner.
	Oh my goodness.
	Well, please go to...
	Even Wikipedia has it better than this.
	And look up Theo Fungo, who I can say I worked with him, and in his very last few months, we actually had pretty good contact.
	He came over to the house one day and he said, what the fuck are you doing in this country?
	You're an American.
	Go back to America.
	It's safe there.
	Oh my God.
	And then he went back to drawing a caricature of me.
	This is unbelievable.
	Well, I watched the South Park episode last night and it sucked.
	It totally sucked.
	It beeped everything.
	It just sucked.
	It wasn't funny.
	It sucked.
	It sucked.
	And I'm thinking this is probably more South Park promotion than anything.
	In fact, I'll keep looking.
	Where's this radical Muslim website?
	No story links to it.
	Where is it?
	I'm looking for the blog post.
	I have actually.
	Oh, you did?
	I couldn't find it.
	It was buried with the hits, and so you had to go to the cache to look at it.
	It's just lame.
	It's just some doofus that's in somewhere.
	I forget, back east somewhere.
	They interviewed him on CNN, and the guy's...
	Well, it was about time for that to happen, wasn't it?
	Man.
	I'm sorry.
	Hold on a second.
	I got stuff going on here.
	Phone's ringing.
	That doesn't happen often on my end.
	Okay.
	You know what, John?
	You have thoroughly freaked me out with that.
	I have no rebuttal.
	I have nothing.
	And don't forget, we forgot to mention, but when we mentioned all our donors, it was NoAgendaShow.com, NoAgendaShow.com, Dvorak.org slash NA, and Dvorak.org slash NASN Channel, Dvorak.com slash NA for contributions to the show and support.
	We appreciate it.
	We do it specifically for the listeners, and they support us and we support them.
	Yes, indeed.
	And I think today was a pretty fine example of the type of programming you get from us.
	Sometimes we suck, and you know what?
	It shows up in the support.
	That show sucked.
	I'm not giving those guys anything.
	We actually don't suck as much as we could.
	When it comes to sucking, we could suck a lot more.
	Yeah.
	Coming to you from the Hilltop Watchtower Crackpot Command Center, which is located in the People's Republic of Southern Salad, California.
	Salad, California.
	I'm Adam Curry.
	And from northern Silicon Valley here, where it's sunny again.
	It was raining a few days ago.
	It might rain again tomorrow, but it's not raining now.
	I'm John C. Dvorak.
	We will talk to you again on Sunday for early morning service right here on No Agenda.

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