Use code "WALSHYT" at checkout for additional savings on your entire purchase! https://genucel.com/walshyt Matt Walsh gives advice to his fans, including a love sick man who wants to move to a different country for a girl he talks to via social media. Does Matt say go for it? Watch to find out. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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| We are going to take a look at some people that are in need of advice, and as always, we've got some listeners who wrote in with their questions, and then we've got one person who, rather than asking me for advice, made the mistake of going to Reddit instead, and so we will help that person out as well. | |
| This is from Anonymous, says, Hello, Mr. Walsh. | |
| I was hoping you could help me with a problem I'm having. | |
| I've been with my girlfriend for four years now. | |
| I plan on proposing to her this year. | |
| I know, I know. | |
| I should have already done it by now. | |
| I'm a bad, sweet baby. | |
| Anyway, we've recently begun to argue quite frequently about what to watch on TV when we watch together. | |
| She likes to watch reruns of Friends and Seinfeld or early 2000s rom-coms. | |
| Not that there's anything wrong with that. | |
| No, of course not. | |
| I like to watch good stuff like Vikings and King of the Hill. | |
| I'm so depressed I can't even blink. | |
| With some generally awesome movies thrown in from time to time. | |
| She usually uses her magic woman powers of guilt to sway me into watching whatever absolute garbage she wants to watch. | |
| She thinks I'm having bowel issues because I'm always going to the bathroom. | |
| But I'm really just sitting on the toilet waiting for her episode of Grey's Anatomy to end. | |
| Based. | |
| Will I ever win this war? | |
| Is there a way to balance this issue? | |
| My flawless taste in entertainment is being polluted by stuff like 90 Day Fiance and Big Brother. | |
| Side note, she's also Jewish and refuses to watch Mel Gibson movies with me. | |
| I get it, but come on. | |
| I don't get it. | |
| First of all, I don't get it at all. | |
| Because she's Jewish, she can't watch Mel Gibson? | |
| This film is anti-Semitic and it must be stopped! | |
| If you're only going to watch films or shows that star or were made by people who've never said anything offensive or unsavory or done anything offensive or unsavory, you've basically eliminated anything you could possibly ever watch, especially coming from modern Hollywood. | |
| So I would even give her that argument. | |
| Um, in general, putting Mel Gibson aside, who, by the way, is one of the best filmmakers currently, even still, working in Hollywood. | |
| If there were any justice in the world, which we know there's not, you would be given an Oscar. | |
| With women, treat movies and shows the same way you do restaurants. | |
| Listen, where should we go? | |
| Anywhere you want. | |
| Let's not think about what I want. | |
| How about anywhere you want? | |
| It's a cliché, it's a stereotype, but it's also almost always true that women have a difficult time deciding where they want to eat. | |
| And so, you know, I'm sure you've had this conversation before, where you're in the car deciding what you want to get on Uber Eats or something, and you ask her, what do you want? | |
| And she says, I don't know, you pick. | |
| And you say, okay, well then here, we'll go to Outback Steakhouse. | |
| So I don't want that. | |
| Okay. | |
| Well, instead, okay, we'll go here and say, Oh, I don't want that either. | |
| So she won't give you a clear idea of what she wants, but at the same time, if you throw an idea, she doesn't like that. | |
| And you just have this back and forth. | |
| That's why when it comes to when you're going out to eat, and this is what I, and I've, I learned this lesson a long time ago. | |
| And so if I'm going out with my wife, we don't even have a conversation anymore about where we're going. | |
| I'll make the reservations. | |
| And I'll say, okay, you know, can you get the babysitter for Friday night at six o'clock? | |
| And then she'll do that, you know, she takes care of that. | |
| And then I go, I make a reservation somewhere. | |
| And she doesn't even know where we're going until we get there a lot of the times. | |
| And it works out. | |
| I pick a place that I know she'll like. | |
| It's not like I'm only trying to pick stuff that I'll like. | |
| I pick a place that I know that she'll like. | |
| We don't have to have an argument about where we're going. | |
| I take care of that. | |
| I take the lead on that. | |
| She appreciates that more. | |
| And really from her perspective, it's like I've taken care of, so you don't have to worry about where we're going to eat. | |
| Who ordered this? | |
| The gentleman did, ma'am. | |
| Most people generally understand that with restaurants, you know, and I think probably most women wouldn't disagree with what I just said. | |
| It's a little bit more controversial with movies and TV shows, but I think you have to adopt a similar attitude, where it's like, you can come up with shows that you know she'll like, or at least she should like them, and so you just got to take the lead on that and say, listen, Here's a good show, we're just going to put it on. | |
| If I describe it to you, you might think you won't like it, but I think you will, so let's just watch it. | |
| And you just take charge, you take that remote, you put it on, and that's it. | |
| Okay? | |
| Now, it's a little bit awkward that I'm giving this advice today, after I just admitted on the show that that's what I did on Valentine's Day, and I put on a 1990s Kurt Russell action flick on Valentine's, when she wanted to over-make the comedy. | |
| I'll admit that I thought she would like it. | |
| Ultimately, it wasn't a big hit. | |
| You're not going to bat a thousand on this thing. | |
| You're going to make mistakes. | |
| It happens. | |
| But, in general, take charge. | |
| Take the remote. | |
| Put on what you know you both will like. | |
| All the advice I've just given you, take it at your own peril. | |
| That's all. | |
| That's the case for all this. | |
| I don't want to take any responsibility. | |
| If I give advice and you run with it, I take no responsibility for what happens after that. | |
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| From Samantha says, Aloha, sweet daddy. | |
| My future mother-in-law recently shared that my fiance's sisters and their husbands had all gone out to a strip club together, buying each other dances and delighting in how the big girls could make it to the top of the pole. | |
| From her perspective, this was a wonderful, normal bonding experience. | |
| I was too aghast to respond, and after she left, I asked my boyfriend what he thought about it. | |
| He simply said he would never want to go to a strip club with his family because it would be awkward. | |
| While this was an encouraging response, I haven't been able to let it go. | |
| I don't mean to add to your problems, I don't know how encouraging that response is actually. | |
| I would never want to go to a strip club with my family, because it would be awkward. | |
| Now, correct, like, that is, I can't imagine anything more awkward than that, and you shouldn't want to go to a strip club with your family. | |
| Um, more encouraging response is, uh, I don't want to go to strip club at all. | |
| Maybe that's a conversation you want to have with him. | |
| Although I've always known his family was more lewd and promiscuous than mine, the new level of debasement, debauchery, and dysfunction the strip club snafu reveals makes me extremely uncomfortable. | |
| I'm now even more concerned about future outings with these people, and I certainly wouldn't want to rear our future children around this sort of immorality and insanity. | |
| My boyfriend is extremely kind and isn't the type of person to criticize his family. | |
| Is there a way to broach this topic without directly criticizing his sisters, their marriages, and their morality? | |
| Am I making a mountain out of a molehill? | |
| You're not making a mountain out of a molehole at all. | |
| I mean, this is disgusting. | |
| First of all, in general, going to a strip club in general, it's, like, dirty, grimy, disgusting places where you've got these drug-addled, like, women who are up on the pole and everything. | |
| You shouldn't even really have any desire to go to a place. | |
| Sitting around with other creepy weirdos, like, watching this. | |
| It's disgusting in general to go with your family or go with your spouse. | |
| I mean, just levels of disgust. | |
| Like you take something that's already gross and just add levels of grossness on top of it. | |
| And so you're not at all wrong for seeing it that way. | |
| And it does reveal something about His family doesn't mean you hold it against your fiance. | |
| He wasn't the one who was there, and it sounds like he objects as well, but it's good information for you to know. | |
| Can you broach this topic with him without directly criticizing his sisters and their marriages? | |
| No, you can't. | |
| Any attempt to broach it without being direct about it, I think, is not going to get you the result that you want. | |
| I mean, you have to address this head on, especially with him. | |
| Doesn't mean you're berating him about it or taking it out on him. | |
| Certainly you don't want to do that. | |
| It sounds like you're not doing that. | |
| But just be direct. | |
| Like, this is wrong. | |
| It's gross. | |
| It reveals something about these people that I'm very uncomfortable with. | |
| When we have kids, you know, this is something I'm going to take into account. | |
| Like, I wouldn't leave my kids with these people, given that their value system is so wildly separated from your own. | |
| And so I think that's something that you want to tell him and just be upfront about. | |
| And based on what you've told me, it sounds like he wouldn't even necessarily disagree. | |
| This from Matthew says, I'm an 18 year old from South Australia. | |
| About six to seven months ago, I started talking to this girl, call her Eliza, from Minnesota, who I followed on Instagram because she always posts epic based things to her story, a lot of which concern you. | |
| We've been talking ever since and it's been really fantastic. | |
| I've never met anyone who not only has such similar views and values to me, but with whom I can relate so deeply and thoroughly. | |
| I'm certain that she is the perfect match for me. | |
| To this end, I've decided that I'm willing to, at some point, when appropriate, move to Minnesota and do all that I can to be with her. | |
| Fortunately for me, she has a boyfriend right now, but I've spotted some misalignments in their beliefs and, hence, problems for their future. | |
| She's also said herself that I would be better for her, but she pictures it like those tragic books where the main character doesn't get to marry the right guy. | |
| I'm 100% ready to wait for this girl, and I've actually already turned down several offers from other girls in South Australia. | |
| I've been told by people, including my mother most recently last night, that I shouldn't put all my eggs in one basket. | |
| I responded that she's telling me to settle, with which she disagreed. | |
| Is waiting the right move? | |
| Am I wasting my time? | |
| Is everyone who is saying long distance doesn't work right? | |
| I know it doesn't, but I haven't had a break in conversation with this girl in seven months. | |
| What do I do? | |
| Wait? | |
| Get over there and try to win her over? | |
| Give up? | |
| I'm in a difficult spot. | |
| Thank you, Papa. | |
| You're a bloody legend. | |
| Love your work, mate. | |
| Papa's sweet daddy, Walsh, is fine. | |
| I'm gonna give you the bad news then, unfortunately. | |
| Matthew, great name, and that is that the issue is not that it's long distance. | |
| Let me say that to begin with. | |
| Long-distance relationships can be fine, they can work, and in the modern age, when you can be in contact with someone, and even Australia to Minnesota is quite a long flight, but you can get on a plane and fly and be there. | |
| What doesn't work is that she has a boyfriend and she's talking to you, and that she's been talking to you, what, for six, seven months, and she's had a boyfriend the whole time. | |
| And she's even saying to you, and we can't even let her off the hook here, by saying, well, maybe she doesn't realize, you know, what this is, she doesn't realize you have feelings for her. | |
| Sounds like you both have had frank conversations and she's told you. | |
| Oh, it's one of those books where you're the right guy, but I'm with this guy and I can't... That is what tells me that you are unfortunately wasting your time with her and there are girls in your life who you know. | |
| Oh! | |
| Congratulations! | |
| And you're rejecting them in favor of this other girl who's with a boyfriend. | |
| I think that's a very bad idea. | |
| And to move from Australia to Minnesota for this person who has a boyfriend is also really bad. | |
| And let me tell you why. | |
| It's not that you're wasting your time waiting. | |
| More than likely, in fact, not more than likely, guaranteed this girl We'll eventually break up with this guy that she's with. | |
| I know that based on her behavior. | |
| It's not gonna last, okay? | |
| So that's gonna... So yeah, I don't mean to encourage you by saying that, but she will break up with him. | |
| But she has revealed something about her character. | |
| It is so bad. | |
| So maybe her political values line up with you. | |
| Maybe her ideological values line up with you. | |
| She's a fan of mine, which is great. | |
| Okay, that's a big plus in her corner there. | |
| That's one for the win column. | |
| But, even so, The fact that she's with someone and yet she's talking to you, which is betraying the person that she's with. | |
| It's dishonest to that guy. | |
| And she's also stringing you along at the same time. | |
| Oh, this is like a romance novel. | |
| No, it's not. | |
| It's real life. | |
| And what she's doing, she's playing games with you and stringing you along. | |
| And she's lying to the guy that she's with. | |
| And I can guarantee you, even if she leaves that guy eventually and she decides that she wants to be with you, how do you know she's not going to do the same damn thing to you? | |
| In fact, you can be pretty sure that she will. | |
| You think that you're going to be so grateful and relieved if you ever won the day, you know, you win the girl and you get to be happily ever after. | |
| What's going to happen is you're going to always be thinking about those six, seven months when you were talking to her and telling her all your feelings and she was talking to you while she was dating somebody else. | |
| And you're always going to be wondering, is she doing that now with some other guy? | |
| Okay. | |
| So, that's why this person is not worth it. | |
| You need to move on. | |
| I hate to give you the bad news. | |
| And actually, I think we'll leave it there. | |
| Well, we don't even need to move on to Reddit. |