Today on the Matt Walsh Show, the actress Ellen Page has announced that she’s actually an actor named Elliot Page. She came out as a man. Of course the media has been in a state of rapturous celebration over it, but I have some questions. I think they are fair questions. Also Five Headlines including Chuck Schumer endorsing Joe Biden’s plan to force women to share the bathroom with men, and Biden’s Treasury secretary nominee explains how she will sue the treasury to heal racism, sexism, and climate change. Finally, today, breathing is canceled. This was not my decision. USA Today canceled breathing in a recent op-Ed and it’s my duty to share the news with you.
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Today on the Matt Wall Show, the actress Ellen Page has announced that she's actually an actor named Elliot Page.
She came out as a man.
Of course, the media has been in a state of rapturous celebration over this, but I have some questions.
I think they're fair questions.
I'll ask them today.
Also, five headlines, including Chuck Schumer endorsing Joe Biden's plan to force women to share the bathroom with men, and Biden's Treasury Secretary nominee explains how she will use the Treasury to Heal racism, heal sexism, and fix climate change.
Finally today, breathing is cancelled.
This was not my decision.
USA Today cancelled breathing in a recent op-ed, and it's my duty to share the news with you, which I will today.
All of that and more on the Matt Wall Show.
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So there was celebration yesterday.
Confetti was thrown.
Champagne was poured.
Tears of joy were wept when the actress Ellen Page revealed that she is a man named Elliot.
Yes, apparently it seems Ellen Page, who has been a woman for 33 years of life, is actually a man, she says.
And for this urgent news bulletin, as always, we'll go to People Magazine.
Here's their report.
Elliot Page is living his truth and coming out as transgender.
Page, formerly known as Ellen, released a heartfelt statement on Twitter Tuesday, writing in part QUOTE, I want to share with you that I am trans.
My pronouns are he, they, and my name is Elliot.
Page added, I feel lucky to be writing this, to be here, to have arrived at this place in my life.
The 33-year-old, known for his Oscar-nominated role in the film Juno, goes on to express overwhelming gratitude for those who have supported his journey, adding QUOTE, Page also asks fans for patience in the statement, explaining that his joy is fragile and that he is scared of invasiveness, hate, jokes, and violence.
He also addresses the discrimination against the trans community, calling it insidious and cruel, resulting in horrific consequences.
According to Page's post, in 2020 alone, it has been reported that at least 40 transgender people have been murdered.
He adds that the majority of those victims have been Black and Latinx trans women.
Page also calls out political leaders who continue to criminalize trans healthcare and deny individuals their right to exist.
He states that those who spew hostility towards the trans community have blood on their hands because 40% of trans adults report attempting suicide.
Page goes on to directly address trans people who deal with the quote, threat of violence every day, saying he sees and loves them and promises that he will do everything he can to change this world for the better.
Last year, Page revealed that he married dancer Emma Portner, who reposted this statement on her Instagram Tuesday, writing in the caption that she is proud of Page and calling his existence a gift in and of itself.
Okay, everything you heard at the end there was completely false.
Actually, it was all completely false, especially the part where she said her authentic self is a man.
But the claim that trans people are the victim of a hate crime epidemic has simply no evidence to support it.
There is a similar lack of evidence to support the claim that healthcare for trans people is being criminalized, and that trans people are being denied the right to exist.
There's only one group of people in this country who are denied the right to exist, and they're still in the womb.
The pro-abortion Paige doesn't care about that group, though, of course.
She'd rather fight imaginary injustices than real ones.
Speaking of imaginary, especially imaginary injustices, you may recall a couple years ago, Ellen Page on TV with Stephen Colbert blaming Mike Pence for the hate crime that Jussie Smollett committed against himself.
It's worth revisiting that rant, I think, because it raises an interesting question.
Listen.
I'm really fired up tonight, but... You have to be fired up.
It feels impossible to not feel this way right now with the president and the vice president, Mike Pence, who, like, wishes I couldn't be married.
Let's just be clear.
The vice president of America wishes I didn't have the love with my wife.
He wanted to ban that in Indiana.
He believes in conversion therapy.
He has hurt LGBTQ people so badly as the government of Indiana, and I think the thing we need to know, and I hope my show Gaycation did this, in terms of connecting the dots, in terms of what happened the other day to Jesse.
I don't know him personally.
I sent all of my love.
Connect the dots.
This is what happens.
If you are in a position of power, and you hate people, and you want to cause suffering to them, You go through the trouble.
You spend your career trying to cause suffering.
What do you think is going to happen?
Kids are going to be abused and they're going to kill themselves.
And people are going to be beaten on the street.
I have traveled the world and I have met the most marginalized people you could meet.
I am lucky to have this time and the privilege to say this.
This needs to f***ing stop.
Okay.
Leaving aside the rather stupefying fact that Ellen Page was somehow trying to blame the vice president for the fact that two imaginary men beat up an actor in Chicago while he was walking to Subway at 2 a.m.
in sub-zero temperatures, we do have to ask one question.
Ellen Page was referring to her own same-sex lesbian marriage to another woman.
Now, with this revelation that she's a man named Elliot, does that mean she was never really a lesbian?
Was she a straight white male this whole time?
And if so, does that mean a straight white male was playing all those roles in all those films that should have gone to real women?
Does she have to give back all of the awards she's received for best female lead in a film?
Well, maybe all of the awards overstates a little bit, but she has won a couple of awards, I think, at least.
Do those get returned?
Or did she just become a man now?
If so, how did that happen?
And if she did just become a man, doesn't that mean she actually changed her sexual orientation going from gay to straight?
Isn't that impossible?
Haven't we been told that's impossible?
By the way, mere nanoseconds after Paige made the announcement, her Wikipedia pages and IMDB pages had been changed immediately to include the new pronouns.
Lightning speed, this change was made.
Creepy enough, but to make things weirder, Paige's Wikipedia page now, if you go and check it out, identifies her as a gay man married to a woman.
Does that make sense?
How does it make sense?
These are just a few of the questions that those who promote left-wing gender theory, the theory that makes it possible, allegedly, for Ellen Page to become a man, or be a man, or to have always been a man while also being a woman, cannot answer.
Will not answer.
We're meant to simply accept that this woman is a man, even though nobody who makes the claim, including Ellen herself, can offer any explanation of it.
They cannot tell you When she became a man, how she became a man, how any of this is possible scientifically or logically.
In fact, the people making the claim cannot even so much as explain what the claim actually is.
Think about that for a moment.
Ellen Page says she's a man.
Okay.
What does she mean by that?
With all these people announcing that they're really a gender other than the one that they were, quote, assigned at birth, The crazy thing is that nobody ever stops to ask the simplest, most basic question.
What do you mean?
What do you mean?
That's a fair question, isn't it?
That's not a transphobic question or a question that otherizes anyone or denies anyone the right to exist.
It's also not a question that shuts anyone down or shouts them down or censors them.
Quite the opposite.
This is a question that seeks to understand.
That seeks even to take the claim seriously.
But I cannot understand you or take you seriously if I don't even know what you mean.
So Ellen Page says she's a man.
All right.
What do you mean, Ellen or Elliot?
What do you mean that you're a man?
In what sense are you a man?
How do you define the word man?
What is a man?
I'm a man myself, always have been as far as I know.
And it's clear that Ellen Page is not exactly like me.
I mean, you could look at Ellen Page and look at me and say, well, there's a very clear difference here.
There's even a difference of kind, of category, it would seem.
There are a number of very significant differences between the two of us.
Differences that go all the way down to the level of DNA, chromosomes, reproductive capabilities, bone structure, muscle mass, et cetera.
It seems that we're both humans, certainly, but different kinds of humans, different categories of human.
Now you say, now we're the same kind, the same category.
Well again, then what kind is that?
Explain that kind.
Define the category.
And it does no good to say that the word man is fluid, or an artificial construct, or that it has no fixed meaning, because if that's the case, then it doesn't mean anything to identify yourself as one.
You may as well still call yourself a woman then, because the words don't mean anything.
You can't very well insist that your identity as this particular thing is important and fundamental and we all have to respect it and also insist that this particular thing has no meaning and could be anything and is nothing but a social construct.
You do see how those two propositions are in direct contradiction, don't you?
See, I want to understand you.
I do.
I just need you to explain what you mean in a way that's coherent.
No, it's not that you owe me specifically an explanation, but if you want to be understood, then you have to explain what you're saying.
If you don't want to be understood, then what's the point of making the announcement in the first place?
You know, I could stand up in front of the whole world and say, everyone, I want you to know, I am a Hoosie Watson.
That's what I am.
That's how I identify.
If I were to say that, the immediate response from the world would be, you're a what now?
What's that?
What's a who's a what's it?
What do you mean?
I can't very well then respond, well, I don't owe you an explanation.
Stay out of my business.
I'm the one who brought it up.
The world didn't bring it up, I did.
The world is just trying to understand what the hell I'm talking about.
But of course, when it comes to a woman saying she's a man or a man saying he's a woman, No one ever explains what's that supposed to mean.
Nobody ever explains anything related to left-wing gender theory, a theory that, as we've covered on this show, was invented about 70 years ago by a lunatic child abuser named John Money, who experimented on two young boys and caused them both to kill themselves.
He's the guy who came up with most of what the left says about gender today, including the idea that a person can have a gender that is at odds with their biological sex.
He came up with it.
This is his idea.
We are meant now to simply accept and believe and parrot these ideas, even if they make no sense.
And even if the people making the claim cannot themselves make sense of it.
Does it matter, though?
That's the other question.
Should we care?
You know, many on the right realize that left-wing gender theory is nonsense.
They realize that men are not women and women are not men.
They realize that this preferred pronoun stuff is absurd.
You know, they realize that you cannot claim your own pronouns for yourself any more than you can claim your own nouns or prepositions or your own adverbs.
Doesn't make any sense.
Grammar doesn't work that way.
Language doesn't work that way.
They realize all of this, but they retreat from the battle over these ideas, crawling under their beds to hide while murmuring something about how this is all a sideshow and it doesn't matter.
That is the rationalization of a coward.
Yes, it matters.
The truth matters.
The truth, in fact, is all that matters.
It's the only thing that matters.
I don't care about anything else but the truth.
And I don't care to spend my time defending anything else but the truth.
The left's gender ideology is, among many other things, all of them bad, a direct assault on the truth.
They want to deny basic truth.
To build a culture that denies it.
To force you to deny it.
And that matters.
It matters a lot.
It's also an assault on children.
Our children.
Your children.
Gender confusion is an epidemic among kids today.
Many lives are being destroyed by it.
We talked about this last week as well.
We've talked about this many times, because it matters.
Other conservatives and many other conservatives with platforms pretend it doesn't matter, but it does.
The left wants to infuse confusion into your child's mind.
They want to rob your child of his understanding of himself.
They're trying to take from him what is most basic, most essential, most needed for a happy and healthy life.
Does that matter?
I can think of very few things that matter more.
So, yes.
We do need to say, it is important to say, that Ellen Page can change her name, fine, she's Elliot now, that's fair, you can be whatever name you want to be.
But she cannot be a man.
She's not a man.
She will never be one.
And I say that not because I'm trying to hurt her feelings or deny her right to exist, but just because it's true.
And the truth matters.
Now let's get to our five headlines.
Well, speaking of gender madness, Chuck Schumer was asked yesterday about Joe Biden's plan
to let men into the women's restroom.
And here's how that conversation went.
Joe Biden said that on his first day of office, he will give transgender students access to sports, bathrooms, and locker rooms in accordance with their gender identity in all federally funded schools.
Do you think he has the ability to do this, and do you agree with this decision?
I agree with the decision, and I know he'll check things out thoroughly legally.
Yeah, so this is to get men into the women's restroom is a top priority now for Joe Biden.
And guys like Chuck Schumer, they're fully on board with it.
Oh, yeah.
First day in office.
This is a first day priority to make sure we get the dudes into the women's bathroom.
Very, very, very important stuff.
Now the question I always ask when this comes up, especially coming from someone like Chuck Schumer and Joe Biden.
Chuck Schumer and Joe Biden, both of them decrepit, ancient old men, okay?
These guys are in their upper 90s, I believe, and they've been in public life forever.
Decades and decades, right?
They'd never mentioned this before.
So right now for Joe Biden, who's been trying to be president for like 50 years, And now he says, first day in office, he's got to get men into the women's restroom.
Why didn't you ever mention that before as a priority?
Decades of public service, if we can call it that, never once mentioned it.
Someone could fact check me on this and go back.
If you can find an example of Chuck Schumer or Joe Biden in, you know, I don't know, 1997 or something, or any time prior to about 2012, Saying anything about gender, transgender, men in the women's room, then let me know.
I've looked.
I haven't seen it.
As far as I can tell, they never once mentioned it.
Now it's a top priority.
So the question always is, okay, you're 78 years old.
You decided, I don't know, maybe around the age of 70, that actually men can be women and that it's okay to have men in the women's restroom.
What changed your mind?
I mean, you live 70 years, apparently, completely confident that men have penises and women have vaginas.
And around the age of 70, you changed your mind.
That is quite a flip-flop, isn't it?
We're always talking about politicians who flip-flop on issues.
I cannot think of a more profound, a bigger, more shocking flip-flop than this.
You flip-flopped on the issue of whether or not men have vaginas, essentially.
So, why?
It's a question the media never asks.
How did you decide this?
What convinced you?
What scientific evidence did you see?
Well, we all know the answer, of course.
These are men without spines.
These are men without anything going on.
These are men without substance.
And so they saw that the winds were shifting that way, and so they shifted with it.
We know that's the real answer, but I would love it if one day they would have to give some kind of answer.
Because they're not going to say that, even though it's true.
Number two, Janet Yellen, Joe Biden's Treasury Secretary pick, has revealed what she plans to do with the position, and here's what she said about that.
We risk missing the obligation to address deeper structural problems.
Inequality, stagnant wages, especially for workers who lack a college education.
Communities that have seen industry disappear with no good jobs replacing lost ones.
Racial disparities in pay, job opportunities, housing, food security, and small business lending that deny wealth building to communities of color.
Gender disparities that keep women out of the workforce and keep our economy from running at full force.
It's a convergence of tragedies that is not only economically unsustainable, but one that betrays our commitment to giving every American an equal chance to get ahead.
But I know this team will never give up that commitment.
As you've said before, Mr. President-elect, Out of our collective pain as a nation, we will find collective purpose to control the pandemic and build our economy back better than before.
To rebuild our infrastructure and create better jobs.
To invest in our workforce.
To advance racial equity and make sure the economic recovery includes everyone.
To address the climate crisis with American ingenuity and American jobs.
Okay, sorry.
That was too long.
I can't even react to that because I couldn't stay awake for it.
That's one thing about these bureaucrats.
They just, speaking of having no substance, just put you right to sleep.
And that's how they get away with doing a lot of the stuff they're doing.
What you just heard there was radical, but it was said in such an intolerably dry and boring way that you can't stay awake for it to listen to what their actual plans are.
And so you just kind of want to wave at them and say, fine, do whatever you want.
Just stop talking, please.
In reality, though, she's talking about using the Treasury to fix climate change.
How are they going to do that?
Of course, it's not possible.
But this is another thing.
This is another promise that Joe Biden has made.
He's going to stop hurricanes.
He's going to fix the weather.
Can't explain how he's going to do it, but he's going to do it.
He's going to stop gender disparities, women not in the workforce.
By the way, if you want to know In most cases, you know, women who are not in the workforce.
My wife, for example, not in the workforce.
Okay, so someone like Janet Yellen and other Democrats will look at that as a problem.
And they see that my wife is not in the workforce.
They say, well, we got to do something to get to get this woman into the workforce.
You know why she's not in the workforce?
Because she doesn't want to be.
She could be.
It's pretty much anyone can get into the workforce if they want to.
It's not hard to get into the workforce.
The sacred, hallowed workforce.
It may surprise, especially Democrats to learn, especially feminists, not everybody wants that.
My wife doesn't want to be in the workforce.
She wants to be at home with the kids, raising kids.
That's what she's doing.
That explains a lot of the quote gender disparities, whether it's fewer women in the workforce, I should say,
or women in jobs that don't pay as much, it's because they make different choices.
And those choices are great.
Those choices are more than fine.
They're great, in my opinion.
But it's their choice.
To call that a problem, I would say, seems rather presumptuous, to say the least.
Number three, Barack Obama, in an interview with Stephen Colbert, wants us to imagine, if you can, imagine this, a fantasy world where Democrats question the results of an election.
Pretty wild stuff, but here he is.
Listen.
You imagine the Super Bowl, and the game's going on, and touchdowns are supposed to be worth six points with the extra point, unless you go for two, and field goals are worth three points, and you're keeping score the whole time, and they're refs, and so forth, and then at the end of the game, a team's won, and somebody says, no!
Field goals aren't worth three.
Or that wasn't really a touchdown.
Hugo Chavez blocking the field goal from the grave.
We've all been watching.
And I guess if you had, the other team just refused to acknowledge it, and you had half The league say, we're not sure it's true.
You'd have a similar controversy, but when that starts happening, the game itself breaks down, right?
And in this case, it's not a game, it's our democracy.
Things fall apart.
Our democracy starts falling apart.
Imagine if, going forward, every single election is treated this way.
At every level.
Imagine if Democrats start acting this way.
Is that part of the danger?
That he's broken the seal on that idea?
That is the concern that I think we all have.
Joe Biden's going to be the next president.
Kamala Harris is going to be the next vice president.
But we don't want to get into a pattern where we just are willing to throw out What we've agreed to previously, including our constitutional structure, just because we find it politically expedient.
My God, these people are just shameless.
Just shameless.
Oh, imagine if Democrats didn't accept the results of an election.
Hard to imagine.
I mean, they've only done that for every major election in recent memory.
Other than that, really difficult to imagine.
They only spent four years claiming that President Trump's election was illegitimate and he's a Russian spy sent here by Putin to destroy the country.
They only spent four years claiming that.
They only tried to impeach him based on that, with no evidence.
Hillary Clinton has been on TV for four years, the woman can't get past it, get over it, saying that Trump is an illegitimate president.
Those words exactly.
Election was stolen.
Those words exactly.
But of course, Barack Obama, and this is what you get from the left always.
They just expect you to, they're just going to wave away reality and say, no, that's not reality.
You, you, you, no, we're not, nope.
You can't acknowledge that.
Didn't happen.
You think it happened, but it didn't.
Just like Ellen Page, you thought she was a woman.
She's not.
Just, nope.
Stop asking questions.
Stop asking questions.
All right, this is from USA Today.
Let's see, my producer sent me this one about the McRib.
How far would you go for a free McRib?
Well, first of all, I wouldn't go far at all.
I literally would not walk across the room for one.
You could have a free one just right across this room here, and I wouldn't get up.
I would get up and walk out of the room.
Just so I don't have to be anywhere near something that tastes and smells like stale dog food smothered in barbecue sauce.
Not even barbecue sauce, just basically ketchup and vinegar.
Which is part of a barbecue sauce, but not the whole thing.
But before the McRib's arrival, which McDonald's has dubbed the sauciest moment of the year, the fast food chain is giving away 10,000 free sandwiches to hungry fans with its Shave for McRib Sweepstakes.
Shave for McRib Sweepstakes.
McDonald's said in a news release, Beard or no beard, prepare for the McRib with a shave.
Because anyone can participate from your brother to your mother, sister-in-law, or cousin's roommate.
Post a picture of your clean, cleanly-shaven or baby-smooth face on your public Twitter or public Instagram profile using Shave for McRib.
Okay, so they're... What in the hell is this?
First of all, how weird is it?
Why do we just accept this?
Speaking of things we should be asking questions about, they're trying to convince people to shave and post it online?
Is this some sort of weird fetish from the McDonald's marketing?
Some depraved fetishist works for the McDonald's marketing department, and he suggested this.
He said, you know what we should do?
We should have people shave and post it online.
That'll be a great, yeah.
That'll be a great marketing campaign.
People will love it.
I mean, I'll love it, at least.
But then on top of that, this again is anti-beard bigotry.
Why would it be the opposite of that?
Especially if this is supposed to be barbecue.
Now, it's fake barbecue, so it's appropriate, I suppose.
You have to shave your beard and be a fake man in order to eat it.
But if this is supposed to be real barbecue, real barbecued ribs, if that's what you're going for, then it should be the opposite.
It should be, grow a beard and we'll give you barbecue as a reward.
You can eat this manly meal now that you have the face of a man, rather than the face of an overgrown child.
I'm telling you, I've been telling you this for a long time, that anti-beard bigotry is one of the last acceptable bigotries, and I think the most sinister bigotry in our society today.
Pretty infuriating.
Number five, finally, new details.
This is from the Daily Wire.
It says, new details have emerged about the disappearance of a 10 to 12 foot monolith that mysteriously appeared in the Utah wilderness earlier this month.
By the way, with this monolith thing, it's weird how we all just decided to call it a monolith instead of like the pole, the podium, something.
We all just decided to go with monolith.
It makes it sound more epic, I suppose, so I guess that's why we're doing that.
Four men removed the monolith and hauled it away, an eyewitness claims.
Ross Bernards, a 34-year-old photographer from Colorado, told the newspaper that he went to the site on Friday, hoping to get a glimpse of the monolith.
He said he saw—how did he know where the monolith was?
Because I thought they weren't telling us.
They were keeping it a secret about where the monolith was for some reason.
So this guy says he went, he's a photographer.
He said he saw four men push the shiny structure to the ground, break it apart, and haul it away in a wheelbarrow.
Then he says, as they walked off with the pieces, one of them said, leave no trace.
I don't know, I'm doubting this.
Personally, I've always wanted to be in a situation where I could say to someone unironically, leave no trace.
It sounds a little bit too cinematic for me, but James Newland, who traveled with Bernard to the site, gave more details.
He said it must have been about 10 or 15 minutes at most for them to knock over the monolith and pull it out.
We didn't know who they were, and we were not going to do anything to stop them.
Cowards.
While Bernard snapped no pictures, Newland reportedly grabbed a few cell phone images of the men, but the cell phone images are grainy.
Okay, so this is a professional photographer.
He goes all the way to the monolith.
He happens to get there at the same moment where mysterious men are in the middle of the night dragging it away.
He doesn't take any pictures, but his friend with a somehow grainy cell phone camera takes a picture.
How do you get a... What does he have, a flip phone from 2004?
How do you even get grainy pictures on cell phones anymore?
And then...
Let's see, there was another set of hikers, Ricardo Marino and Sierra Van Meter, went to the site on Friday.
And what they claim, this is one of the guys, Marino, says, we believe we might be the first people to come to the Utah monolith and have it not be here anymore, unfortunately.
But what we do see, though, is someone wrote, by B-word, and clearly took a P on where the monolith once stood.
I don't know, the mystery deepens.
So, okay, so they drag it away, they say, leave no trace, and yet they scrawled bi on the sand and peed.
I don't think these guys quite understand what leave no trace means.
So the mystery continues.
But I, of course, I will continue in my theory that obviously this in some way involves aliens, I'm sure.
Before we get to our daily cancellation today, one of the themes I think we go back to on this show a lot is sort of what does it mean to be a conservative and what are you trying to conserve?
Well, we're trying to conserve and preserve America and what makes America special.
And when you think about now, the evils and the threats that were faced, that's why I want to tell you about AMAC, the Association of Mature American Citizens.
It's the fastest-growing conservative group in America.
You can join AMAC.
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But more importantly, AMAC fights for you.
We know that a socialist storm is brewing.
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The benefits of AMAC membership are great, but the cause, I think, is even greater.
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Join today at amac.us forward slash Walsh.
And also, if you're not already a Daily Wire member, now is the time to join because we've got some amazing stuff that's right around the corner.
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But I am not having a good time with this part of it, the Daily Wire Christmas ornaments that I am, again, forced to tell you about.
What I would ask is, listen, if you guys care about me at all, just buy these damn things, and once they're all bought, I won't have to talk about it anymore, and I won't have to endure this humiliation.
All the Daily Wire hosts, plus God King Jeremy Boring as Santa's adorable elves, made out of painted metal.
You can get those ornaments there.
I can't, you know, the ornament of me, it does capture my essence, I have to admit, at least that much.
But I still, I still object.
I object on moral grounds to this.
Yet I'm promoting it anyway.
Because they're paying me to.
So, text CHRISTMAS to 83400 to get your tree decorated with these wonderful ornaments.
They're going fast, so get yours now.
Please, dear God, I beg you.
Let's get now to our daily cancellation.
So today we're going to cancel breathing.
To be clear, I'm not canceling breathing myself.
I kind of like breathing, personally.
Most of the time, I actually enjoy breathing.
Unless I'm in a rest-stop bathroom.
Or someplace similar, like a Burger King.
But USA Today, in an op-ed, has cancelled breathing.
No more breathing is not allowed.
The article written by Michael Stern, which I'm pretty sure is not parody, has this headline.
COVID has turned breathing into a deadly event and all of us into potential serial killers.
Now, at a different time and place, that headline would be the kind of thing you
might hear if you work with paranoid schizophrenics in the psych ward of a hospital.
But now it's the subject of an editorial in a major American publication.
And it gets worse.
So listen to this as we read the articles.
As coronavirus burns an exponential path of destruction across the American terrain, an insidious blanket of shadow damage is quietly unfurling in its name.
It's not just the death and scarred lungs.
COVID-19 has turned every man, woman, and child into a potential serial killer.
Let's just try to look past the abysmal writing here.
I mean, an insidious blanket of shadow damage?
That sounds like a lyric from a Dashboard confessional song in 2002.
Or maybe Shadow Damage could be the title track of an album by a band called the Insidious Blankets.
Anyway, the real issue is that you have just been accused of being a serial killer for breathing.
Every time you walk down the street breathing, you're joining the likes of John Wayne Gacy and Ted Bundy.
And, you know, by the way, John Wayne Gacy and Ted Bundy also, they would also breathe, I'm told.
Even Hitler could breathe.
And now you're breathing.
Coincidence?
I think not.
Let's keep reading.
It says, So far, I've been fortunate.
But not a day goes by that I don't wonder whether my streak of good luck is about to end.
Because the person in front of me in the grocery line is wearing a mask below his nose, expelling a cloud of radioactive COVID dust that I cannot escape, short of dropping $50 on the conveyor belt and trying to outrun the security guard.
So another side note here, are we going to get a fact check on this?
Is Twitter going to flag this?
Is Facebook going to put one of their third-party fact checkers on the case?
Radioactive COVID dust?
That might actually be another good band name, but aside from that, is there any science to this claim?
That there's such a thing as COVID dust and that it's radioactive?
For that matter, is there any science to the claim that the breath from a person's nostrils could carry enough viral load to infect you if you're standing behind them for three minutes at the grocery store?
Where's the science on that?
Well, it doesn't matter.
You know, we know that by now.
The science doesn't matter as long as what you're saying about COVID is scary.
If you're saying scary stuff that terrifies people, it doesn't matter if it's factual
or if there's any evidence.
If you're saying stuff that makes COVID seem a little less scary,
then you better come armed with volumes of studies, research, medical charts, everything.
Back to the article, it says, it's bad enough that we have to fear contracting
a deadly virus from a stranger at TJ Maxx who reaches for the same decorative throw pillow.
What's worse is the brutal reality that the people we love and trust most in this world bring us the same risk.
More risk, because these are the people with whom we have regular and close contact.
Any sustained encounter with those we love—kisses, hugs, laughs, conversations—could bring fever, blood clots, fluid-filled lungs, and death.
Okay, sidebar again, first of all, what kind of man is shopping for decorative throw pillows at TJ Maxx?
See, I don't have to worry about getting COVID while I shop for decorative throw pillows because I would never do that.
I've always said that the decorative throw pillow industry would completely collapse if all women on earth were raptured into the sky.
That industry is done.
Along with the decorative soap industry, the wrapping paper industry, because, man, we would just put everything in paper bags.
But apparently this guy is breaking ranks, and he's doing his part to keep the decorative throw pillow industry going.
But more importantly, no, you don't have to fear contracting a virus because you reached for a pillow.
You can fear it if you want to.
You don't have to.
And you shouldn't.
There are many more worthwhile things to fear.
Back to the article, it goes on for a while, but this is how he wraps it up.
He says, And so, as the world eagerly awaits a vaccine that promises to be rolled out over the next six months, the wrath of the coronavirus will not end with inoculation.
The way we look at our own survival, the dangers faced by those we love, will be stamped with COVID's dirty fingerprint for years to come.
Yeah, speak for yourself.
I can tell you right now, I didn't learn anything about my own mortality or about the dangers faced by those I love from this.
I already knew that I was mortal.
I knew that the world is full of dangers.
None of that is news to me.
But as we recently discussed, for those who have lived their whole lives without ever confronting or acknowledging their own mortality, this has, I suppose, indeed been a wake-up call.
And many of them, as we see exhibited here, are not handling it well at all.
And that's what this is really about.
The author of this delusional, paranoid piece of psychotic fear-mongering either had pre-existing mental illnesses that are now being aggravated during the COVID crisis, or he had lived such a psychologically sheltered life beforehand that the existence of a threat, any threat, however comparatively mild, is intolerable for him.
He can't process it.
He can't deal with it.
Yes, it's true, technically.
That someone could indirectly kill you by breathing too close to you.
It's possible that you could indirectly kill someone by breathing too close to them.
It's also possible that a rock could fly out of the sky, crack open your skull.
It's possible that you might get a brain-eating amoeba by jumping into a lake, or even taking a shower.
Did you know that?
Did you know you can get a braiding amoeba from taking a shower?
I think.
Don't quote me on that.
you It's at least possible.
I mean, it's a logical possibility.
It's possible that the pain in your side is a symptom of stage 4 cancer and you'll be dead in a week.
It's possible that somebody will break into your house tonight and chop off your head while you sleep.
Look, a lot of things are possible.
Are any of them likely?
Not really.
Some are more likely than others.
But the chances in all these cases are far less than 50%.
Far, far, far less.
And so the job of an adult human who wants to function in society and have any chance of being successful and well-adjusted and happy is to keep all of the terrible possibilities in proper perspective.
And to accept that, yes, one day a terrible thing will happen to you.
A fatal thing, in fact.
One day a fatal and terrible thing will happen to everyone you know and love.
Your spouse, your children, everyone.
You do have to accept that.
You can't function if you don't.
That doesn't mean we should be apathetic or that we should accept or embrace unreasonable risk.
It just means that you confront and acknowledge your mortality, humanity's mortality, and go about your life taking precautions where you can, but never to the point that it causes you to forfeit all of the things that make living life worthwhile in the first place.
And so, on second thought, breathing is not cancelled.
This paranoid, cowardly, insane panic porn is cancelled.
Everybody else is free to go.
And even to breathe.
For now.
Until the next cancellation, at least.
And we'll leave it there.
Thanks for watching, everybody.
Thanks for listening.
Have a great day.
Godspeed.
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The Matt Wall Show is produced by Sean Hampton, executive producer Jeremy Boring.
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Our technical producer is Austin Stevens, edited by Danny D'Amico, and our audio is mixed by Robin Fenderson.
The Matt Wall Show is a Daily Wire production, copyright Daily Wire 2020.
Hey everyone, it's Andrew Klavan, host of The Andrew Klavan Show.
Joe Biden's new cabinet is incredibly diverse.
There are women who believe in big government, and blacks who believe in big government, and immigrants who believe in big government.
So anyone who doesn't like big government must hate diversity.
