"'Debate bros' are following the scientific method more stringently than faux-intellectuals" (preview)
It's a jam-packed episode today as we listen to Florida republicans pass a harsh new anti-immigrant bill and then beg the undocumented people in their community to continue working on their farms. Also, a stewardess for an Irish airlines puts Israeli passengers' lives in peril when she says the P word over the intercom, and we look at some truly oblivious zionist clapbacks Plus: the "debate me" craze reaches a fever pitch, as debate fans seek out a scientist they want to see owned on Joe Rogan--and for the scientific community to acknowledge the vital step they represent in the scientific method Finally, a man from the Chicago suburbs shoots himself in his sleep while dreaming about a home invasion, and a gun rights advocate explains how safe it normally is to sleep with your gun. Listen to the full episode and hundreds of others by signing up at http://patreon.com/miniondeathcult for only $5/month
So, I don't know how I didn't see this story sooner.
This happened on the 17th, or that's when this was posted to Not The Bee, our favorite real news site of crazy stories that sound like they should be headlines from the Babylon Bee.
But they're real life!
A man in Illinois is facing felony charges after he shot himself in the leg while he was asleep and dreaming about an intruder.
You can't even shoot yourself these days.
It's fucking bullshit.
It's my leg!
Yeah.
I own it.
I literally own it.
I have the paperwork.
I mean, can I guess before we read it?
Oh yeah, sure, yeah.
Yeah, like, is it because the gun was, like, unregistered?
It was, like, an illegal gun?
Um, close, but then, that's not, keep thinking, keep- Okay.
That's all I had, that's all I could think of.
Cause this is a pretty crazy story.
He got his gun license revoked.
Oh!
So the gun isn't illegal, like him having it is illegal, you know what I mean?
Yeah, yeah, of course.
So you were close, but not quite there.
Yeah, that makes sense, okay.
Okay, cool.
And then also a negligent discharge for fucking handling a gun in his sleep.
How do you get a hold of your gun in your sleep, man?
That means it's not stored properly, that's for damn sure.
The graphic here is a man pointing a gun at his own feet.
It's like a stock model.
The stock model who got to do this.
Kind of a crazy horny picture, actually.
That's anti-horny.
He's going to shoot the source of horniness.
Don't shoot the feet.
No, not the toes.
No, they're pointing at the feet, not the leg at all.
Yeah.
A man in Illinois is facing time in prison after he accidentally shot himself in the leg in his sleep.
I think this is the best one we've had so far.
Well, the best one hands down is the one, the guy who shot himself in the balls because he was trying to prove that it was totally safe to point a loaded gun at your balls with your finger in the trigger.
I mean, and then there's the guy who shot himself on January 6th.
Right?
Didn't that also happen?
Tased himself, I think, right?
Tased himself to death, right?
That's what happened.
Tased himself in the balls to death, I think.
Remember the early YouTube video of the cop who shot himself in front of the classroom?
And he plays it off, he tries to be cool about it?
That's a great one, too.
That's a legendary one, I forgot about that.
This is a Glock 40.
50 cent, too short, all of them talking about Glock 40.
Okay, I'm the only one in this room professional enough that I know of and carry this Glock 40.
Is everybody all right?
Listen, listen up, guys.
But, listen up.
And I made a mistake.
So listen to me.
Guys, listen to me. - Yeah, this is too easy.
See that how the accident happened?
It can happen to you and you can be blown away.
Okay?
So guys, never play with guns.
See how accidents happen?
They happen.
Okay, now I'll fight, never ever be able to show guns again.
But Brian, so bring that up and go now, Brian. - Yeah, shooting yourself in your sleep because you were having fucking suburban fevered, fevered nightmares about an intruder in your house.
He told the police that he was dreaming about an intruder who entered his house.
The 62-year-old Chicago Suburbanite, ding ding ding, apparently has really vivid and realistic dreams.
No, they're pretty average.
Sound pretty average for the 62-year-old Chicago Suburbanite.
Yeah, I wonder where he gets these dreams from.
And to be fair, if I lived outside Chicago, I'd probably have similar dreams.
This is actually a criticism of the media.
They are critiquing the media right here in this.
They are saying absolutely.
They're doing a lot of fear mongering in Chicago.
That's what they're saying here.
The Lake Barrington man was charged about two months after Lake County Sheriff's deputies were called to his home on April 10th on a report about a person with a gunshot wound.
Police said deputies who found The 62-year-old man with a gunshot wound to one of his legs applied a tourniquet to the limb because he was, quote, losing a significant amount of blood yet before being hospitalized, police said.
It was almost as if he was shot at very close range.
The man picked up a .357 Magnum after believing a man broke into his house and began robbing him.
This is just, this is what suburbanites, they love.
They love to have this dream.
He was just like, He spent two hours scrolling through Nextdoor before going to sleep.
And yeah, dreamt of his greatest fantasy, getting to shoot a nameless, faceless intruder in his house.
He probably was, like, working backwards, too.
It was probably the dream.
It was, like, him, like, meeting Clint Eastwood.
And it was like, I bet you're wondering how I got here.
And then it was a flashback, too.
Whoa.
To the intruder coming in and him shooting the intruder, but it was his own leg.
Yeah, so he, like, went deeper in the dream, like, inception.
Yeah.
So when he fired the gun, you'd think it would be like moving slower, because time moves more slowly at that second level.
So he would have opportunity to like react and move his leg out of the way or something.
I don't know.
He should have done that, I think.
Or at least tried.
I think so.
That's when 9-1-1 was called.
He shot at the intruder in the dream, but in reality shot himself in the leg and woke himself up.
This is so good.
You have to say woke himself up like, yeah, yeah, he shot himself in the leg.
He's going to wake up after that.
Like ask, ask this guy how to log into his utilities account online.
Yeah, it's right.
He's going to, he's going to stare at you like he's already dead.
Ask him to reach for his gun in the middle of the night and fire it blindly while he's asleep.
He's gonna do that.
Yeah.
This is a hyper-focused individual.
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