Support the show for $3.11/mo and get a bonus episode every week at http://patreon.com/miniondeathcult and instant access to the entire catelogue of bonus episodes, including audio of our live readings of seminal texts like Rodham, My Antifa Lover, and Gents We Need To Talk About Feminist This week we cover NYC cop mayor Eric Adams getting busted for saying the "cracker" "slur," and in light og this news, conservatives are forced to be racist. Also: Vincent Gallo is in the new Ben Shapiro movie, so we explore some of his hits, including a line of boomer facebook t shirts full of actual slurs and cable news greivances. Music: Battles - Fort Greene Park
The liberals are destroying California, and conservative humor gone awry... Conservative humor gone awry is going to fascistphonia today, so stay tuned.
We're going to take a few pictures of the desert and how their policies are actually messing it up.
It's not beautiful when you go across that border.
Stay tuned guys, we'll show you exactly what it looks like when people go to school in the desert.
Follow their environment, Houston.
Stay tuned.
Okay, I'm Alexander Edward.
And I'm Tony Boswell.
And we are Minion Death Cult.
The world is ending.
Another politician, with their smooth talk, revealing themselves to be totally phony, is responsible.
We're documenting it.
What's up everybody?
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I heard that maybe Google is inserting ads into every podcast when you listen to a Google podcast player.
I heard that might be the case.
If you hear an ad during the show, we're not getting any money from that.
We make money on this show is by Patreon and that's the only way to support this show is to support us on Patreon where for $3.11 a month you can get a bonus episode every single week as well as access to every previous bonus episode we've done.
We've had Patreon for like Two years now, two and a half years at this point.
A lot, lot, lot, lot of material that's on there.
It's stacked, yeah.
You get instant access to it the moment you subscribe right into your podcast app or however you listen to the free show.
You also get access to the audio versions of the live readings I did on YouTube last year, which people seem to like.
If you're into theory and stuff, that's where you want to check those out.
Those are real important.
Yeah, I go over the various leftist texts like that one fantasy novel about Hillary Clinton having sex with Bill Clinton.
Yeah, I forgot about that.
You've done a few bangers.
It wasn't all just falling in love with Antifa.
Yeah, or gents we need to talk about feminist.
And we did.
And we did more than we thought.
Yeah, but that's patreon.com slash MinionDeathCult.
P-A-T-R-E-O-N dot com slash MinionDeathCult.
$3.11 a month.
Yeah, gets you instant access to all those bonus episodes.
Those episodes have been great lately.
Been a lot of fun.
Really weird stuff we've had to talk about.
If you support us at the $5 level, you get All those bonus episodes, and then twice a month you get Tony Boswell, my co-host here, you get Tony's bonus podcast called Last Responders, which is a recap show of our favorite liberal first responder hero worship show, 9-1-1 and 9-1-1 Lone Star.
And don't worry, if you've never heard of 9-1-1 or 9-1-1 Lone Star, neither have most of the guests who I've asked and they've generously watched the show for me.
So just jump on in there.
It's beautifully chaotic.
I figured out a really good shorthand for describing what the show is.
Please.
It's body positive body horror.
That's exactly what it is.
It's bodies of all kinds being maimed.
Yeah, it's bodies in spaces getting sucked into balling return mechanisms.
Yeah, exactly.
Don't worry.
We'll dig love anybody.
We don't care what your background is.
Yeah, we appreciate everybody who supports us there, and let's get on with the show, Tony.
You said you had some local news that was going on in Riverside, California?
Yeah, in today's Illin' Empire Lib Report, so we... The Illin' Empire went viral again not too long ago for a really, really sad, stupid reason.
of uh a of a math teacher teaching math and i didn't know you could teach math racially but you can and we all saw it and it was that uh the teacher doing the sohcahtoa the sohcahtoa geometry teaching um by basically mocking indigenous people um yeah she was doing the class she was doing the like war whooping chant of to sohcahtoa and it's i loved i love that sort of uh Creative, inventive teaching.
Because, um, like, you only need to know SOHCAHTOA as just, oh, these are the three types of ratios.
Yeah, you need it to pass that test you're learning it for, and that's really it.
No, but not even!
Like, knowing that SOH stands for, uh, what, SINE?
Knowing that, like, doesn't help you solve a sinusoidal equation.
Cosine and tangent?
Yeah, you just, those are just, it's like how you remember the, it's like, I don't know, it's like going to a history class in high school and reciting the Nina, the Pinta, the Santa Maria, the Nina, the Pinta, the Santa, and you're like, okay, well, what did they do?
Cool, cool, I'm glad you know that.
It's also like when I was in high school, I had a history teacher who was just awful.
Awful smell in that classroom.
He was an awful, wrinkled old man who was very off-putting.
He was the girls' golf coach.
I didn't think he was good to be around girls.
I feel like I remember... I think I know who you're talking about.
I feel like I got a bad vibe.
He was one of my history teachers, and he would ask for volunteers.
One day, he asked for volunteers.
We were learning about French shit.
And he was like, OK, I'm talking about Marie Antoinette and Louis XVI, or whatever.
And they got married.
And so can I have two volunteers, a boy and a girl?
And he's like, OK, now go outside, and then come back in holding hands.
And they came back in holding hands and he was like, I now pronounce you king and queen.
Cool.
And that was like the lesson.
That was how we learned about that marriage was he just did it in the most Stilted, like, said it in the most stilted way possible.
It's like, whatever, this ate up 10 minutes of class time.
That's what it was for.
It was totally strategic.
He does force marriages just to kind of fill time.
And like, that's kind of what I think this lady was doing.
It's like, I gotta let go.
And like, this is an old way of teaching this.
I like to remember this, um, what do they call those, like, mind tricks to remember things?
Yeah, they call it a Johnny Mnemonic device.
A Jedi mind trick?
Yeah.
Um, and so yeah, so people were really upset with it, as they should be.
Um, and they, they pressed.
And they pressed hard.
And they, uh, they got her fired.
She got fired for this.
Um, now, like, the principal of the school and her people above her who allowed this to happen for apparently the past nine years.
There was like no accountability for that at all.
They just fired her, and I'm like really excited to see how that's gonna affect the teachers union.
Yeah, it's kind of weird.
Yeah, like I don't know, you know, not really my place to say.
I don't know if firing her was the bet.
Maybe just take her aside and be like... What the fuck, man?
What's wrong with you?
Can you not do that ever again?
Like, let's have a, let's have, like, me internally, like, if I'm, you know, part of the administration, I'm like, okay, I'm going to, like, try to have a normal conversation with this teacher and see if, like, anything goes horribly awry.
Yeah.
And if everything else seems normal, I'm going to be like, okay, that other thing you did in class, like, you just got to stop doing it.
Especially so much.
Yeah.
So aggressively.
And like, and I almost feel for it because, like, the class, Some people don't know when they're being laughed at and laughed with.
Yeah.
And the class was entertained.
Shocked!
A little horrified, but entertained.
So they got her fired, which is cool, because don't worry, Riverside has no bigger fish to fry.
It's not like their sheriff is not nationally known for being a piece of shit.
Shout out Chad Bianco.
Have a bad one, bro.
It is weird that that's the successful firing.
I mean, teachers get fired.
That's not unheard of.
But it is for like, I guess it's because it's for like, you know, a woke reason or it's like an anti-racist reason that it actually happened.
But I mean, I don't, I don't know.
You know, it's, it seems like a wet dream for the right wing to be able to get teachers fired.
this totally and i guess you know there was probably a lot of i think well we covered it at the time and there was a lot of like concern trolling from right wing uh people who were like well this this is one of the crazy libs teaching our class she's identifying as as pocahontas in front of the class or whatever yeah and like i and that's that's the slippery slope is now i'm waiting for you know the right collection of parents to be mad at like a teacher for you know being too gay why they teach Yeah.
You know, and like that's, there's like a religious thing there.
It's like, so they're gonna try this stuff, and it's like, oh cool, really glad that we did, this is how we handle it.
There was no conversation really about, like, nobody learned from this.
Like, nobody grew from this, just someone lost their job.
Which is always a success, right?
I learned about trigonometry from it.
I can't say we didn't learn anything from it.
That's true.
I won't forget, at least, those acronyms.
It's sine, right?
Sine, cosine, and tangent?
Yeah.
So why is it SOH-CAH-TOA?
Oh, S-TOA.
Yeah.
Oh, because it's like... I think it is like the relationship between... I think there is like some ratio hidden in SOH-CAH-TOA.
The golden ratio?
Yeah, let me look it up.
Just for...
Yeah, sine is opposite over hypotenuse.
Cosine is adjacent divided by hypotenuse.
Okay, so, I take it back.
We did learn a lot today.
We learned a lot today.
Wow, and this is a free app?
Shit, okay, cool, cool.
Maybe we are sponsored by a master class.
We're sponsored by a master class, trigonometry edition, free episode.
I watched – we have like a spooky movie club that we go to – well, they go to it every week.
I go to it like every other week or something like that.
We watched Trash Humpers last night.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Have you seen it?
I never actually saw it, but I'm just aware of it.
It's Harmony Corrine, right?
It's Harmony Corrine, director of Gummo, Beach Bum, Spring Breakers, etc.
One of the worst movies I've ever seen in my life.
Yeah it looks terrible.
It's like legitimately one of the stupidest things I've ever watched.
There's probably gonna be people who are like no it's actually like brilliant or it's it's incredibly funny uh but it wasn't my best like it's it's billed as like a horror movie kind of um interesting i didn't know that but yeah that makes sense my best
description of it or like the way i would convey what i saw is like imagine like pre-jackass cky dudes uh wearing old people halloween masks yeah and doing one skit where they pretend to be crazy for like an hour
That's kind of what I got because it was during like the, it did come out during like jackass, like peak jackass era.
Yeah, it's 2009.
It's also got some heavy like trying to be Tim and Eric, you know, off-putting humor or using like, you know, fringe people and getting sort of like because it's supposed to be candid it's supposed to be like found footage right yeah um it really just made me want to watch crazy dave tape like that's but yes that's the real spooky tape that everyone needs to watch
Uh, it's, yeah, it's just like, okay, uh, we're going to go into a parking lot and you guys are going to be weird.
You guys are going to, and it's like, okay, I'll hump the trash can for 10 minutes while, uh, the other two stand there and say, yeah, get it!
Get it!
I mean, it must be nice if that, I mean, that's not weird to me.
That's just sounds like Tuesday.
Uh, the, the highlights of the movie, the genuine highlights of the movie were they got some kid to take like a baby doll and just hit it in the face with a hammer over and over and over and over again.
And that was like kind of funny.
Um, and then it was like funny, but also like effective, like, Oh, this is like a, this is like kind of fucked up, you know?
Yeah.
Uh, and then they got one of the guys, one of the other fringe characters to do a monologue about how, Humans would be better if nobody had a head.
Because, for one thing, we wouldn't get dizzy anymore.
Yeah, because of the inner ear.
It wouldn't be there.
Those were the two good parts of the movie.
Man, art's so stupid.
Art sucks.
Art's bad.
It was like trying very hard, but also with little effort.
If that makes any sense.
Yeah, it's very, uh, harmony, Korean, like, cool.
I don't know, I thought Beach Bum was good and, uh... No, there's some hits, there's some hits.
Gummo's good.
There's some hits, but there's also a lot of just like, oh cool, so you recorded uncomfortable stuff.
That's cool.
Yeah, I don't know, it was very like, oh yeah!
And unsettling.
For like 20 minutes in one scene.
I'm so unsettled right now.
This is haunting.
I'm going to have bad dreams of it now.
I'll watch it on Halloween, let you know how I feel.
I want to instead see the car body horror movie, Titane, or however it's pronounced.
Titania, I don't know.
Oh, I don't know that one.
I want to watch that one.
That sounds cool.
I think a girl turns into a car, or she gets pregnant with a car, or something like that.
Tight?
It sounds really good.
I was hoping, because I was thinking Crash.
But that's, yeah, that sounds cool.
I think it's similar to Crash, a little bit.
Like a humanoid transformer?
Like a kind of a transformer monster?
Uh, yeah, but like a transformer that's like halfway between worlds.
Like the Blade of Transformers.
Oh!
Like a Daywalker of Transformers.
Honestly, like the Blade of Transformers might be the best tagline possible.
Yeah.
You're basically about to witness the Blade of Transformers.
Yeah, I don't know.
Let's move on to our first topic here.
On a more serious note, of course, I have an article here from Fox News.
Eric Adams, who is of course the African-American mayor of New York City right now, new mayor replaced Bill de Blasio, famously former police officer, very pro-cop.
Very, uh, kind of weird.
Real lame.
Real lame-o.
Uh, Eric Adams, this is from Fox News, Eric Adams uses racial slur in unearthed 2019 video on policing.
I love how dramatic that is, because you're like, unearthed?
From 2019?
What?
Yeah.
Uh, I, I, the way I thought this was going was, They caught him saying the n-word and they're gonna try to wokely accuse him of racism for saying the n-word.
I wish.
That'd be fucking awesome.
That'd be so good.
I want that.
But instead, the quote is, New York City Mayor bragged he quote, kicked those crackers bleep.
Yep.
And the bleep is a dash dash.
And that tells you everything you need to know about what's happening here.
Every letter of Crackers is there.
We are reading Crackers.
It's even punctuized correctly.
Yeah, it's punctuized correctly.
But the ass is edited.
I mean, democracy dies in darkness, Tony.
Sometimes you have to print the slur in question.
Brave.
I mean... Very brave.
You have to shine a spotlight on it.
This is why, again, this is like why, you know, Joe Rogan had Milo Yiannopoulos on his podcast.
You have to, like, you have to show people what's actually going on, no matter how, like, pedophilic it might be.
Yeah, and not only that, but it's important that you go to the people who are being affected by this.
So I'm glad that when I look at the panel and the video, they did get exclusively Crackers to talk to about this.
And I think that's really cool.
They didn't just sprinkle one or two in there.
I'm happy with that.
Very brave.
They must have really had to scour the whole studio to find three of them.
Yeah, it's so good.
An unearthed video of newly minted New York City Mayor Eric Adams shows him using a racial slur in a talk on policing.
The 2019 video shows Adams speaking to a crowd at the Harlem Business Alliance about his rise through the ranks of the New York Police Department.
Oh.
Well, so like when you hear the quote, I kicked those crackers asses.
You're like, hmm, I wonder what that means.
He means the other cops.
Like, I, I do like that sell.
Like if you're going to get me to, if you're trying to get me to be on like, like you being a cop, you telling me that you would just beat up a bunch of white cops to get there does help.
It's not going to do it, but it's, that's the way, that's the way you're going to want to go.
I mean, that's obviously what he's trying to do.
Like this is okay.
Let me read the quote every day in the police department.
I kicked those crackers bleeps, man.
Adam said in the video reviewed by Fox news digital, I was unbelievable in the police department.
And what's funny is like, He must be talking about, like, I got the best test scores.
I got the best reviews.
He's not a very menacing dude.
He probably can scrap, but I don't think that would have happened.
There's so many other stories of black people trying to come up in the NYPD being beat in the showers.
I don't know what he's talking about.
I don't know if I believe him.
Um, it's the most, like...
What's up, fellow kids?
I'm gonna sit backwards in my chair and put my hat on backwards and also wear my clothes backwards.
Are the rappers still doing that one?
Yeah.
I'm here to just level with you guys.
That's what this shit is.
Like, I'm cool.
And it's, I love that he's talking to the Harlem Business Alliance.
So this is like, he's like, he's cool guying the rest of the cops because, hey, you know, we're all cool guys in here.
You know what it must have been like.
Man, I went into the shower, all their dicks were so small, and the police department, I had the biggest one.
What I would really do is, what really, really laid it down, is I would let them know that I'm on soft right now.
Like, that's right boys, this is soft.
Soft meat coming through.
Oh man, I was at the, you know, I worked for Raytheon for two years.
Uh, in the, uh, the child drone department.
The child-seeking drone department.
Uh, and after one year, I looked at our results and I, man, I fucking okayed those boomers over in Hellfire Missiles.
Yeah, it was, it was pretty crazy.
I mean, like, back then we would have said that, you know, we were, uh, Superman'd them hoes, but that's, but today we definitely okayed them boomers.
Yeah, I fucking, man, I owned those bootlickers, uh, so hard over there in Missile Sales.
Um, yeah, you know who else, uh, didn't abide by Honkey's Hayton?
Jesus of Nazareth.
Facts.
Yeah.
Facts.
That, we all know that that table he flipped was a crackers table.
Yeah.
uh yeah so this makes him cool this makes him the cool cop now because uh you know he said honky cops be tripping on me yeah um i became a sergeant a lieutenant and a captain you know the story adams also said some people oversell it trying to reinvent me but the reality is what i was then is who i am now adams was asked about his use of the slur At a Friday press conference, prompting him to apologize.
Again, and just to reiterate what you said, Tony, it's so funny to try to desperately, sweaty, like you can see beads of sweat forming on this article as it tries to call Cracker a slur.
Yep, yep.
At least stick to it.
Printed in full next to a censored ass, which is like an actual word.
That's one of the first ones you get to say because you're like, but it's a donkey.
It's in the Bible.
Like, I don't think Cracker is even in, is even in the Bible.
I think he calls his piece of body a wafer.
Yeah.
That's why, I mean, that's why you're not allowed to say it is because it's not in the Bible.
It's not in the Bible.
That's why it's a slur.
Yeah.
Adams was asked about his use of the slur at a Friday press conference, prompting him to apologize.
Quote, should not have been used.
Someone asked me a question using that comment and playing on that word, I responded in that comment, Adam said.
But clearly it is a comment that should not be used.
And I apologize, not only to those who heard it, but to New Yorkers, because they should expect more from me.
And that was inappropriate.
But most of all, I apologize to all those crackers you asses I kicked back in the day.
New York Police Benevolent Association, so the union president, Patrick Lynch, addressed the mayor's previous comments in a Friday statement saying, quote, whenever a controversial video of a police officer surfaces online, we ask for fairness instead of a rush to outrage.
You know, whether it's shooting someone in the back or trying a little too hard to appear cool in the lead up to your mayoral candidacy.
Whether it's like a literal firing line or if it's, you know, just someone getting a little loose in a little barbershop talk with the Harlem Business Association.
Quote, we will apply the same standard here.
We have spoken with Mayor Adams about this video, Lynch continued.
We have spent far too many hours together in hospital emergency rooms these past few weeks.
Oh my god, are those crackers okay?
Is he still doing it?
Is this still happening?
Is that why you can't talk about it?
Is he still doing it?
And we've worked together for decades before that.
Quote, And I think we can all agree that we all need to focus to kick one cracker's ass.
And that cracker is racism.
We need to kick that cracker's ass.
We all, as together, we need to do that.
Yeah, we need to curb-stomp the Nazi known as white supremacy.
Yeah, we need to get rid of it.
It's so funny to be like, okay, this guy is the ultimate cop, right?
He's the ultimate cop candidate for mayor, right?
Yeah.
And he's running as a Democrat, though, so he's got to, like, throw something Again, the business community.
So he's like a pro-business, you know, pro-cop Democrat, which is like, you know, all of them essentially anyway, but he's like, oh no, but I, but I, I do like a casual, what do you call it?
Like a rehabilitative anti-white racism.
Yeah, exactly.
Honestly, I think that a black mayor cop saying cracker is praxis.
That's what praxis is.
It's called restorative justice.
Exactly.
We look at this and we're like, what are your plans on solving inequality, solving the decline in black wealth and black life expectancy and the incarceration rate?
And he's all, damn dude, you sound white when you say that shit to me.
Oh, that sounds real white.
Oh, that's crazy.
How about you?
How about you ask me about all the crackers whose asses I kicked instead?
Like, what are you doing?
That's... Who's code-switching now there, bud?
What are you doing?
Who's this for?
Your buds over there?
But yeah, so he like ran his cop, coppity cop, cop, cop.
I'm the cop guy.
You know, I'm going to, I'm going to bring like respect for the police back, you know, to, to this city.
Cause again, Adam, Eric Adams took a hard stance against his party's quote, demonizing of law enforcement in July.
So once again, like heat of the Black Lives Matter movement, you know what I mean?
Pointing out that a few of his fellow Democrats have ever been part of law enforcement.
No, they just give them billions of dollars every year instead.
Yeah.
Dude, one of the worst individuals on this planet is a black cop.
Like, black cop is the worst.
The worst person.
Yeah, Bernie Mac.
I hate that guy.
Bernie Mac?
How's Bernie Mac a black cop?
No, he's... Oh, well, no.
He did the parody of... What is it?
It's... Is it Boys in the Hood?
I'm trying to remember, because I just remember from Don't Be a Menace.
Bernie Mac plays the racist black cop.
Which is great.
Such a good character.
I totally forgot about that.
I was like, no, I love Bernie Mac.
Steve Harvey's a cop though.
Really?
He has cop-like vibes.
I don't like Steve Harvey, that's all.
Yeah, he tells people when they get the answer wrong.
He judges people too harshly, I think.
And he's extremely homophobic.
Yeah to be like I'm the cop guy and then it's like but you have to do performative uh liberalism by like dunking on the white cops or something it's so funny like the contortion I mean it's and it's like who gives a shit because he won anyway and yeah also it's like You're the fucking mayor of New York City.
Your job is basically a liaison to, uh, the cops and, I don't know, uh, like, real estate moguls.
Like, that's what your job is anyway, so... Really, who cares?
Of course he was gonna get it, but, um...
Pretty funny.
The self-seriousness of the article is amazing.
Just like the whole, yeah, on-earth racial slur.
It's like, calm down.
None of that, none of that happened.
You know, you can't on-earth something from 2019.
Sorry.
Yeah.
There's not really any earth on it.
There's maybe like some dust on it.
Yeah.
You undust it.
That dust is not qualified.
You dust it off.
You dust it off the video.
You can't like blow earth off of something.
Um, I just, I don't understand why Eric Adams, uh, why he can't say the C word when plenty of rappers that I listen to say it all the time.
Yeah.
Uh, Adam Calhoun, Tom McDonald, Forgiato Blow, they can say it, but he can't.
They can say it?
That's fucking hypocritical.
Yeah.
Hypocritical.
Imagine the situation were reversed and like, I don't know, another popular figure, let's say like a podcaster, said something, you know, equally bad or almost as bad as the C word, like, you know, the N word, for instance.
That guy would lose his job so fast, all of our heads would spin.
It would be, yeah, it would be, we would never recover from how fast our heads would be spinning.
We would be wishing we had no heads.
That guy surely would be punished.
Did that happen?
Joe Rogan said the N-word like 17 times.
You didn't see the video?
No, I wouldn't click on Joe Rogan saying the N-word 17 times.
There might be like one of those times where I'm like, oh, it sounded good though.
It sounded nice.
He did it.
He got that one off.
Yeah, some of them sounded good, to be fair.
Just kidding.
Uh, yeah, no.
That's like the newest controversy, is that, like, after, you know, he weathered the storm of, like, vaccine and COVID misinformation, somebody edited a video of all the times he said the hard R-N word on his podcast.
So wild.
Like, how are those still out there, my guy?
Well, Spotify removed the episodes.
Spotify, like, just, I think, recently removed the episodes.
Good, because I will not be deleting my Spotify anytime soon, unfortunately.
But just imagine, you know, if that happened to a white guy saying the n-word, there'd probably be serious repercussions.
That's wild.
That's amazing.
A lot of people were really mad about this.
It was really funny.
The comments were just wonderful on Fox News.
And it's very funny for people to be like, every single person who was mad about Eric Adams, uh, saying Cracker is also the type of person to post on Facebook about how you couldn't make blazing saddles anymore.
Because it's not PC enough.
And it's like, what, what do you think they were saying in that movie?
They were definitely saying Cracker a whole bunch.
That was like number one joke and it was hilarious every time.
Um.
R underscore D in the comment section says, well there you go folks, another fraud politician.
I really wanted to give this guy the benefit of the doubt.
Disappointed for the good people of New York City.
Why do you keep voting the same way?
What's the fraud about him though?
He's being up front of apparently kicking people's asses throughout the academy.
The fraud would be like, I'm all for, I don't know, what's the fraud?
Is that he's a racist?
The fraud is that he's presented himself as a pro-cop guy, but secretly he's racist against white people.
He's been beating up the white cops the whole time.
Yeah.
He only likes some cops.
This is the, this is like the best possible, this is like the most pathetic response to this.
Like I'm just, wow, I'm really disappointed.
You know, I thought, I thought we had a real pro, pro police guy in there, a real serious guy.
Uh, wow.
It turns out egg on my face.
Wow.
I just, you know, this is what you get for believing in somebody.
I feel real dumb.
And apparently he doesn't even live in New York City, so like, even more embarrassing.
But that's the only reason... That's the only reason he didn't vote for him.
See, the DSA actually knew about these foul statements made by Eric Adams before the election, and that's why they didn't support him.
That's why.
We don't abide by anti-white racism.
Sorry.
We would love to, but unfortunately we do a lot of work on Twitch, and you can't be on Twitch with that kind of mouth.
C-N-Y-T, I don't know, whatever, who cares.
Their incomprehensible username.
They said, 2019 is not that long ago.
If a conservative or Republican had said something similar, we all know the firestorm that would have followed.
The double standard is incredible.
The firestorm is like a myriad of comments.
That's the firestorm.
And I just like, I'm reading them like, if a conservative or Republican had said something similar, Similar.
The thing is, in their mind, it is similar.
It's not just similar.
It's basically the same.
And it gets better because Happy I'm Not a Dem replies, "So true.
If it was a white guy saying a slur toward black officers, he would have been lynched by now." Oh, so stoked to use that word.
You know the rich history of famously lynched white men in America who were lynched for using... You know the white men who were lynched for using racial slurs against black people?
Against black cops.
Learn your history.
Yeah, white cops famously lynched for using the n-word.
Throughout history.
All the time, all the time.
Well, I mean, you just can't say that word, but you could pretty much do anything else.
That's the whole thing.
Um, out of this, like the number one response to this was just, oh, because he, uh, because I suddenly don't like him because he's a Democrat mayor of New York City, uh, and he's black.
Uh, I have to like figure out why I can talk shit about this cop.
You know?
And so the number one response is, oh, affirmative action.
Yep.
He's a product of affirmative action.
He's talking about how he rose through the ranks of the NYPD or wherever he was.
It was because of affirmative action.
That's why he did it.
That's a pretty predictable response, yeah.
The number one, like the highest comments were like, you know, oh, wow.
I'm unable to tell whether or not he achieved these goals by his own merit or because of the color of his skin.
It's unfortunate.
You know, I'd like to give him credit, but I can't.
To that effect, Mr. Drago says he, quote, he outperformed as he grew his career as a police officer.
Did he truly outperform or was he merely a beneficiary of affirmative action?
I've seen that dozens of times.
When I was stationed overseas, those of an italics certain culture always seemed to make rank before those who weren't regardless their time in abilities or qualifications.
They brought the skepticism themselves by years of screaming for preferential treatment.
What?
When I see someone of, again, italics, a certain culture, Promoted or getting ahead.
I immediately wonder if it's because of the color of their skin I like how he's doing like triple parentheses, but for black people.
Yeah, it's just like italics, you know I recall a few years ago that the civil service exam for police and fire was dumbed down in italics for those of a certain culture Someone can correct me, but I think it was New York City.
Did this jack leg benefit from that?
This jack leg?
I don't know what this is, but I don't like it.
I don't like that one either.
I don't like it.
Is that about big dicks?
Yeah, he's got a jacked third leg.
Is that what that is?
Yeah, you know the U.S.
military famous for just like promoting and taking care of their black, of like black members of the military?
Also, the U.S.
military famous for promoting the best people.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You're wrong across the board here.
And also, how bad did you suck if you just didn't get promoted?
Is that what's going on?
You're there for 12 years, my guy.
I love, so there's a couple things about this that I love.
When I see someone of a certain culture promoted or getting ahead, I immediately wonder if it's because of the color of their skin and they brought this on themselves.
That's like a top like logical argument these people are making is that, oh, well, no, my racism is because of affirmative action. - Yeah, my racism is merely an observation that you made me tape make. - Yeah, oh, I would love to judge everybody my racism is merely an observation that you made me tape make. - Yeah, oh, I would love to judge everybody by You made me question the character.
So now, like, when I look at a commanding officer, I can't tell if they're good or not.
I need to be able to watch TV and see a guy on TV and being like, that guy deserves his job.
But now, if he's black, I'm not gonna know from my couch whether or not that guy deserved his job or not.
Exactly.
I used to know that when my kid had a black classmate, that that kid was a genius and that's why they're in the class with my average white kid.
And I knew that and that made me feel good, you know?
It just feels like if you have a commanding officer, you know, or a boss, you know, at your precinct or whatever...
You should be able to tell whether they deserved that job or not.
Yeah.
You don't have to be like, I'm always going to wonder if my boss got this job because of this or because of merit.
It's like, first of all, nobody fucking gets a job based on merit.
You're a moron for thinking that in the first place.
You're a child.
You have the brain of a golden retriever if you think that.
And what kind of composers are excited for their like, hey, you know what, boss?
You really deserve that, big guy.
Well, it gives me hope.
Good on ya.
Good on ya, Chief.
As somebody else who deserves the best in life, as me, it's nice to see other people who deserve the best in life getting it.
It's gonna be me next time, as long as they don't, you know, diversify between now and then.
But it's gonna be me next time, as long as there's no diversity, you know, between now and then.
Yeah, that job could have gone to all the white guys in the police department, but they gave it to a black guy instead.
You know those white guys got families?
You know, they got families.
Yeah, the other thing, when I see someone of a certain culture promoted or getting ahead, I immediately wonder, you know, if it's because of that culture or whatever.
You're just describing policing.
You're describing the whole culture of police, who get whatever the fuck they want, whenever the fuck they want, to the degree that they want it.
Yeah, it is that easy.
Also, I mean, this is not really his fault.
I don't know if you know this, but the New York Police Department, they actually have a program to where you can challenge anybody for their position with a game of one-on-one.
And it's not my fault that I, you know, that I have less fast twitch muscles than certain individuals.
This sentence, they brought the skepticism themselves by years of screaming for preferential treatment.
Who does that actually sound like?
Like who does that sound like that's had an actual effect on the world?
I don't know, maybe we could review a little thing called qualified immunity.
Yeah, yep.
Literally not being held responsible for your actions.
The actions of killing people.
The actions of committing other crimes.
Hurting other people.
Because of the culture that you're in.
Yeah, because of the job title you have.
Yeah, I just... So amazing.
Yeah, pretty funny.
That you got because your uncle and your dad were both those two.
Roy Davey says about Eric Adams, he earned his position the same as Aunt Jemima will have earned hers when Dementia Joe appoints her to the Supreme Court.
What?
Aunt Jemima did not get promoted.
Aunt Jemima got disappeared.
What?
Amazing.
I mean, 12 other people loved this comment, Tony.
I don't know what you're not getting about it.
Everybody else knew what he was saying.
Beautiful comment.
I love, I love how just, what a gaudy and not this person's brain must be.
Oh my god.
No, this is just straight up racism because it's a black woman.
Yeah.
Huh.
Oh my god.
I was like, wait, hold on.
They got, they got, and they were like, oh, that's what you call black women as Aunt Jemima.
Oh, get that.
Oh, fuck, man.
But it's like, weren't you guys upset about Aunt Jemima being removed from the bottle because she earned her way onto the bottle?
Well, the thing is now, now that, now that like the bottle's gone, we could acknowledge that that's racism and use it as such.
Well, now that the bottle's gone, we all forgot not to do it anymore.
We all forgot that racism was bad.
That's why we kept the bottle around, was to preserve history, so that we would remember not to repeat it.
And now that the bottle's gone, I'm just gonna be calling black women Aunt Jemima all the time now.
All the time.
That's amazing.
That's amazing.
These people look at Kamala Harris, the way she is and presents and thinks of themselves like, Aunt Jemima.
Yeah.
That's incredible.
Fuck, man.
That should be edited.
That should be bleeped.
I love the main argument from the right or like the meme on the right was that Aunt Jemima was a hard-working entrepreneur who like earned her name on the bottle of syrup or pancakes or whatever which is all like completely false.
Yeah, we've been over that.
Literal marketing By the, you know, the Pearl Milling Company, like, invented that story for morons like you to buy their product.
And that's why they were so, you know, shocked and aghast that she was removed.
And then now, yeah, we've just reverted back to using it for what it actually was intended, which is a racist caricature of a black woman.
Yeah, there it is.
Yeah, bring it back.
Bring him back.
Finally, and I want you to kind of, like, Ruminate on this, on this take.
I think this is a good take.
I want you to think about it before you respond immediately.
Like kind of let it sink in.
All right.
Conserve says, who perpetuates the existence of racism?
Why... It's the people who stand to benefit the most from it.
Man.
Man.
Yeah, that makes you think.
Can we stop recording for a minute?
I'm really questioning everything.
I'm really questioning everything I thought I knew.
It's like that famous quote from Aristotle.
If you want to know who really pulls the strings, look at the people you're allowed to be racist to.
Yeah.
This person's like, Gaslighting black people?
like all black people, just like gaslighting little things.
Like, have you thought that maybe you're doing this to yourself? - Well, it's just funny because it's like, okay, yeah.
What you basically said was almost a tautology.
- Yeah.
- Who perpetuates racism?
The people who benefit from the racism.
And I'm like, yeah, okay, like capitalists, like, you know, the people in power, like that's who perpetuates the racism.
The people who are actually going to benefit from it.
But like, yeah, if your brain is fucking broken, you're like, oh, black people.
But yeah, you say the existence of racism.
They're the ones who benefit from the existence of racism.
So we continue to spread the word of this magic thing called racism.
Honestly, can you measure racism?
How's your facts and logic and science doing with that?
Can you measure racism?
Well, I mean, actually, yeah, you can.
There is, like, data.
But yeah, anyways, this is just so good.
So I would say to that argument, like, Okay so the idea is like oh affirmative action is like we're like black people are secretly keeping racism alive or the myth of racism alive uh in order to yeah score that sweet new job promotion or whatever right through affirmative action but again like we talked about with you know Eric Adams it's like okay one spot opened up for how many How many people of color?
How many black people?
Like, how does that help black people?
And it's like, well, you have to remember where there's a thing called false consciousness.
And every like working class black person is actually a temporarily embarrassed affirmative action Supreme Court justice.
Yeah.
We're going to have to learn to erase that false consciousness before we can move forward.
I'm going to have that Tyrese moment where he was singing, getting out of the bus, and the guy from Coca-Cola heard him and was like, you're the Coca-Cola guy now?
You know that's the origin of Tyrese, right?
Yeah, that's the real origin of Tyrese.
But just one day someone's going to hear me talking just so eloquently and be like, you know what?
Have you thought about becoming a Supreme Court Justice?
I just know it's going to be.
You fit all my needs right now.
All the check marks.
Have you thought about playing a principal in an after school sitcom?
Oh man, the diversity in TV right now, that's a whole different... I don't want to talk about that right now.
There's some rough shows on right now.
There's some rough shows on right now.
I mean, I think you're covering the biggest one.
Yeah.
On Last Responders every other week.
Alright, moving on.
So we kind of talked about experimental filmmaking a little bit with Trash Humpers at the top of the show.
It's time to talk about another experimental filmmaker, Ben Shapiro.
Ben Shapiro?
Ben Shapiro is releasing a movie featuring Vincent Gallo, famous of course for Buffalo 66 and The Brown Bunny.
I feel like there's a reason I haven't heard from Vincent Gallo in a while.
I can't remember what it is, but he's back in a big way apparently?
He's probably disappeared by the Hollywood Starwhackers.
Yep.
Yep.
Awful.
I hadn't heard from Vincent Gallo in a while.
Not really a big fan though, so I can't really say that I would have otherwise, but Ben Shapiro posted on Facebook, Vincent Gallo is back in a big way!
Join us for a movie premiere event over at YouTube on Thursday, February 10th at 9 p.m.
to watch this gripping thriller.
After the premiere, Shut In will be only available exclusively for Daily Wire members.
So don't miss your chance to watch it.
So weird.
So yeah, remember that guy who performed unsimulated sex on his star actress in the final scene of The Brown Bunny?
Remember that?
He's back, baby!
He's back.
In a big way.
I can't wait to see what he does in this.
We're gonna see.
So The Daily Wire just made a movie with Vincent Gallo.
That's what happened, right?
Yeah, well they're becoming a production company so they like greenlit the script and I think the director was already attached to do it.
It was going to be going through a different production company and then they dropped it and so Daily Wire picked it up.
The movie does not sound good.
It does not sound good enough for us to even make fun of.
It sounds pretty boring.
It's about an addict who gets locked in her own pantry while her ex-boyfriend and his friend like ransack the house while her daughter is also in the house.
Oh, yeah.
So, but if they're doing this, is there like a message behind this?
Is this like some sort of propaganda film?
Yeah, the message is that she's like a recovering addict, and I think it's like through Christ she finds the strength to stand your ground on the home intruders.
Okay, that's cool.
Yeah, I can get into that.
So it's like Panic Room, but it's not.
Yeah, it's like Panic Room, but instead of Jodie Foster, it's Vincent Gallo.
Vincent Gallo.
So he's the ex-boyfriend?
He's the friend of the ex-boyfriend.
It's his job to be a creep, I think, and like threaten the, you know, threaten to like, I don't know, do whatever to the daughter, the like young daughter.
I think that's his role, apparently, judging by the trailer.
I think there's that quote where he's like, you look like Hollywood material.
Take you to Hollywood.
Uh, so I, you know, it'd be probably fun to talk about a whole movie, uh, from the Daily Wire starring or at least featuring Vincent Gallo, but I don't think, don't think it's really going to be worth it.
No.
Um, but I was like you, like you, Tony, I was like, man, what?
Vincent Gallo is still alive?
That's crazy.
What has this guy been up to?
And, uh, yeah, I searched, I searched him on Google and like the first thing that came up was, uh, his thoughts on Black Lives Matter and basically the 2020 protests.
And, um, the main response, his main response was to make, uh, incredibly one-off expensive boutique, incredibly Facebook t-shirts.
And so I'm, and I was reading about the descriptions of these and I was like, that's amazing.
And then it turns out that they're still available.
You know, if they aren't sold out, they're still available on his website.
And the ones that are sold out, the description, uh, the descriptions are still there.
I, I, I think I need one.
I think I need one of these.
Well, let's set a Patreon goal.
Get 2,000 patrons and we'll buy Tony the size medium fuckface Adam Schiff t-shirt.
Yeah, please.
Amazing.
They're amazing.
Oh man, they're so good.
They're so good.
So I'm looking at, this is under artworks at vgmerchandise.com, the official website for Vincent Gallo merchandise.
Vincent Gallo began his work as a visual artist at a very young age in New York City.
Presented here are early works from 1978 through his most recent works of 2006.
Wow.
- Oh, hasn't updated that part of it.
The only things that are listed here are his T-shirts.
Okay.
Yeah.
And they're all posted on 2020.
The first one, like I said, is a white shirt with just Adam Schiff, Democrat Adam Schiff, a picture of him and it says fuckface on his forehead.
That's amazing.
It kicks so much ass.
You would like not know who this was.
If you weren't in a Facebook group or if you weren't a resistance lib, you would have no idea who this is.
No.
And you definitely wouldn't have any interest in buying a shirt that says it.
You're not even going to fit anybody with this.
The next one under it is titled, Ignorant.
And it's a white t-shirt with a photo of AOC on it.
And on her forehead, it says, Ignorant.
Amazing.
What a badass.
What a subversive guy.
The description here, her combination of super red lipstick and angry screeching voice is not my favorite thing in the world.
Try to imagine divorcing her with kids involved?
Imagine her as your neighbor.
Imagine working for her.
That poor ugly redhead she dates.
That's kind of funny.
Politically... Imagine divorcing somebody.
Just skipping the cool part.
Imagine divorcing them.
Yeah.
Well, I mean, if you're a certain type of person, you know where things are headed.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, AOC thinks everybody who hates her just wants to fuck her.
Can you imagine divorcing a person like this?
It'd be very difficult.
Yeah.
Not easy, like divorcing Vincent.
I'm sure divorcing Vincent Gallo is really easy.
Politically, AOC operates on the level of a neurotic homeowners association board member, which would lead anyone to sell their condo.
So you're like, you're denigrating somebody who's on a board of homeowners association, on the board of a homeowners association, but you are also a member of that homeowners association?
Like, I don't, the...
I don't know.
The analogy's not hitting home for me.
Well, they gotta move, they gotta move so that they can, uh, like, I don't know, they don't want to be in that neighborhood anymore.
They want to drop, the poverty value's gonna drop.
This is like, man, this is like that one person, uh, in this, at one of your peers, that's at the same level of you, that you just don't like.
You know what I mean.
You know that person who's also on the Homeowners Association with you, but they're not one of the cool ones.
No, they're not the cool ones.
They're always trying to rat on me for, you know, like, I'm just trying to hang my own flag outside of my house just because it's like, I'm a big World War II buff.
Don't worry about it.
Yeah, she reminds me a lot of one of those crackers on the Homeowners Association.
Yeah.
Get her ass!
She is petty, small-minded, and above all completely IGNORANT!
If certain women keep celebrating this type of low-level woman, it's gonna be harder for women to make a good case for equality.
I sense she doesn't smell good.
I sense she doesn't smell good.
Like, just in case you didn't get it, I have to let you know that... That's the racist part, right?
Like, there's no way she smells good.
Uh, I don't know if that's racism.
I think it's, again, just, like... ...him imagining what she smells like.
Like, that's... that's, like, the jumping-off point.
Who knows, like, which direction he would have gone with that?
But he's just fantasizing about smelling her.
Again, what we're talking about here is a one-of-a-kind, one-of-one t-shirt, handmade by and signed by Vincent Gallo, marked label one-of-one, permanent ink on, yada yada, and this is available for $666.
Is that one sold out?
That one's sold out, yeah.
They're all that price.
Everyone's that price, which is amazing.
Very cool.
Well, it's all to show how demonic they are, not him.
He's a good right-wing Christian guy now, I think.
Do you think people actually bought these, or do you think that he just took them down?
I think people bought them.
Some of them are still for sale.
Yeah, and the ones that are still for sale kind of make sense that they're still for sale.
Like the Miss Cuomo one.
I love this one.
Number three is titled, Smart, Black, Beautiful, and it's just a photo of Candace Owens.
I will say it's like a really good photo of Candace Owens.
It's rendered in a very good way.
She has a very, like, Blaxploitation look in this photo.
It's very cool.
She's wearing, like, a black turtleneck.
Yeah, she's wearing a turtleneck, you know, and just, like, looks like kind of, like, an old vintage picture.
And, like, if you didn't know that that's, like, Candace Owens, you're like, yeah, I bet that person is smart, black, and beautiful.
I mean, I know for sure the last two.
I know she's for sure black and beautiful.
Like, yeah, your daughter-in-law, she's a black person, she's like the first black member of your family, and you're like, oh, I need a Christmas gift for her.
This just comes across your feed, and you're like, oh, she'll like this.
Stunning young black woman.
She'll identify.
She reminded me of you.
She reminded me of you.
Because you're also smart, black, and if you don't mind me saying, son, beautiful.
Yeah, I bet that juice is real sweet.
Is it true what they say?
True what they say?
And then the only description is, I like everything about Candace Owens.
Every.
Single.
Thing.
And he's like, what he's kind of saying here is, even the black part.
Believe it or not.
Even the part where she's black.
I have a feeling she smells delightful.
She probably smells great.
She probably smells yummy.
Uh, he's got one of Mario, a t-shirt of Mario Cuomo.
Or no, this is, uh... Yeah, wait, which is the one that's on TV?
Chris Cuomo.
Yeah.
He's the CNN guy.
Again, this is like Facebook mindset.
So you're just mad at the news anchor.
You like the right-wing, you know, political pundit.
Mm-hmm.
Candace Owens.
Your sworn enemy is the political talking head on CNN.
And it says it's just his face and then it says Ms.
Cuomo.
Ms.
Cuomo.
Because he's a woman.
This guy is unbalanced, twisted, a real closet case.
The private school rich kid who makes believe he's a tough guy.
Trust me Fredo, you ain't a tough guy.
You're Ms.
Cuomo.
Dude, I have seen like every one of these statements in a Facebook group.
Yeah, Gallo's in it.
Gallo's probably in... Oh my god!
Oh my god!
I did not see... Did you see the rest of that shirt?
Did you click on the shirt?
Uh, let me click through again here.
What are we seeing?
Uh, it says on Sharpie it has the F word written on it.
Above it.
Okay, yeah.
He wrote the F slur.
Hard T with the hard T.
Wow!
Hey, tell us how you really feel, Vincent.
It is on a sleeveless shirt, so this is punk rock, maybe?
Um... What the fuck, man?
I mean, if he's... In case you missed it, he does zoom in on that part.
Yeah, so you can see.
So, but I mean, so does that mean that Miss Cuomo is dating women because he's a F-slur?
I'm so confused.
Because she's an F-slang, you know?
Yeah.
Come on, you're mixing it.
I'm confused.
I need to know why not to like this guy.
Is he a girl, actually, and that's why I don't like him?
Or is he a gay guy and that's why I don't like him?
Because if he's a gay girl, I kind of like her.
It's kind of cool.
I kind of like when they do that.
You know?
Yeah, that's tight.
No, he's a girl because he is gay.
Definitely.
Okay, that tracks.
Yeah.
Yeah.
There's so many.
We can't do them all, but they're so fucking funny.
Like, there's a motif here with... Okay, yeah, let's just keep going in order.
They're so good.
Yeah, because the next one's amazing.
I mean, this one's still for sale.
If anyone wanted to get us this one, I think it would be very appropriate for the show.
Or, I mean, just send $666 to us instead.
And we'll do something similar to it.
Yeah, we'll make our own Colin Kaepernick shirt.
Yeah So number five is called white boy white boy all caps And it's got a yeah a photo of Colin Kaepernick With his afro and then it says white boy over the afro.
Yep.
Yep through the afro Yeah, white font on the black afro.
These are like stunningly shitty t-shirts.
Really bad.
Why does it seem so often the lightest skinned, most entitled mulattoes are the angriest?
It's true.
It's true.
If I might say so myself, I'm so sorry.
I'm a victim of my conditioning.
My conditioning has been conditioned.
I suggest this ex-employee of the NFL read Thomas Sowell and try to stop hating himself for being so damn attracted to white women.
America is so great and our diversity is so powerful.
Let's celebrate together and join hands.
Earth, Wind, and Fire.
What?
Was that Earth, Wind, and Fire?
Just for the record, I like this music.
Is that what he's saying?
Yeah.
Earth, Wind, and Fire.
But don't worry though.
Honestly, I think the reason why this isn't selling is because Colin Kaepernick's not even relevant anymore.
Clearly, the NFL are cool now, they are no longer racist, and I know that because Kendrick Lamar would never do a halftime show for a racist company.
The NFL is cool now because they hired the cop haters to do the halftime show.
Yeah, and they got racist-ass Coca-Cola out of there and got cool, hip Pepsi in there.
I hope they get Eric Adams on there to talk more shit on white cops.
That would be so sick.
Hopefully he gets a whole verse.
Yeah, oh, you're a white boy.
That's the joke on the shirt.
White boy, yeah.
They would hate being called a white boy, so I'm gonna call him a white boy.
Dude, why does Vincent Gallo suck?
I think he's insane.
I think he sucks and he's also insane.
Like, it's so funny, because I remember him being just kind of like a controversial art guy, but I didn't realize he's just like an art school Republican.
And it's really funny.
He's like an alt-right guy but he doesn't know how to do it so he's just like screaming in all caps Facebook font.
Well the thing is he is like actually kind of cool like he's cool he's hip he like has aesthetic so he like but that doesn't actually work for this messaging it's the wrong demographic.
Well he's not actually involved in like the modern right-wing you know grassroots political I mean I don't know.
So he's like an edgy guy, right?
Like artistically.
That's like what he brands himself as.
That's what he likes.
The edgy political movement would have been, yeah, the alt-right or like neo-fascist stuff.
And if he were at all tuned into, you know, actual political discourse and not just, I don't know where he gets his politics, probably just from reading, like, maybe Breitbart.
He's probably, like, friends with, like, Richard Spencer.
I don't even think so, because then why is he so obsessed with Chris Cuomo, you know?
Yeah, that's true, yeah, yeah.
Why is he obsessed with Adam Schiff?
Like, those guys don't care about that.
He's like a cool, he's still like a, he, like, used to read Vice.
Yeah, exactly.
He should be going on What's-His-Name's podcast.
I love how he has pictures of the shirt and then he has the images on the shirt and that one's watermarked.
But the shirt is just a black and white photo of Colin Kaepernick with any iPhone app.
Text white boy over it.
That's it.
Like you don't need to you don't need to trademark this my guy and it's funny cuz I on his and then on over the San Francisco 49ers logo.
It's sharpied the word hate I Just I fucking hate hate man.
I just hate it.
You know, the next one's pretty good, too number six is cock grabber And this is Don Lemon, another news anchor.
So yeah, just the enemies of freedom, CNN news anchors.
Don Lemon with the words cock grabber on his forehead.
Just for the record, the open, like the homepage to Vincent Gallo's like Website the the the splash page opens up is him grabbing his own cock like in a like a Navy outfit He's it's him grabbing his own cock on the cover So, I mean, maybe it's a compliment Well, let's read the description here something about this guy seems really off I can't put my finger on it.
I don't want to put my finger on it.
I sense behind his light brown curtain is something very, very dark.
In a perfect world, to me, he's a cabana boy working gay cruises for happy ending tips.
Dash.
At best.
Wait, hold on.
A happy ending tip would mean that you're the cabana boy and they're sucking your dick for bringing drinks.
That's, I mean, sure.
Right?
That's what that would mean, right?
It would mean Don Lemon is that.
But Don Lemon's getting his dick sucked.
Oh, um... I don't know.
Because a happy ending tip is that.
But getting a tip for a happy ending is different.
Yeah, I don't know.
It's not really clearly worded, unfortunately.
In a perfect world, to me, this is what would happen.
The next one is just a photo of George Washington with the text, again, over his forehead.
Another great white man!
Or sorry, there's even more text.
Another Great White Man is just the title of the shirt.
Another one of the many, many great white men!
It's many, many, many, actually.
There's three manys.
Great white men.
Hell yeah, brother.
This description's good.
I admire George Washington.
A lot.
I could only wish to be half the great man he was.
Yeah, it's like his, it's the ones that he likes, he has nothing really to say.
Like, and his one that he, about Candace Owen, he was like, Candace Owen is great.
I love everything about her.
Not just some things, but all the things about her.
And then with the George Washington one, it's, I admire George Washington.
A lot.
A lot.
This is like, this is like the most phoned in third grade book report stuff.
It's so good.
Uh, Zucker... No, that's not Mark Zuckerberg.
This is, again, this is the CEO of CNN, whose face I only know... Jeff Zuckerman.
I only know this guy's face because he recently resigned from CNN, and they're all talking about it.
But this is from last year, or two years ago, rather.
He's been hatin' him.
It's just, yeah, you're just like so knee deep in anti-CNN, anti-The View Facebook groups.
It just, it's Jeff Zuckerman and it says Cock Zucker on there.
Get it?
Do you get it?
Kanye West's one.
See, this is one that he likes.
It's Kanye West and it just says made in the USA at the top and at the bottom.
Smart, funny, wild, talented, original.
Yep.
The description is, Kanye West is one of the greats, and I have been very inspired by him.
I wish this, I wish this shirt said, one of the many, many, many, many, many great black men.
I wonder why it didn't say that.
I wish the Candace Olin one said that too.
Uh, he's got one for Kellyanne Conway.
Jesus Christ.
Yep.
Former Trump's spokesperson.
Kellyanne Conway.
These are so dated.
These are all so dated.
They were dated in 2020.
She wasn't even his spokesperson for like that half of his term.
Kellyanne Conway.
Her husband is the luckiest man alive.
I've always dreamed of a wife like her.
Yes, I'm proposing.
Okay.
Again, just insane.
He's just making t-shirts of like... And it's very... It's so, like, liberal, too.
It's like, ooh, Kamala Harris.
I'd love to serve her breakfast in bed.
Oh my god, the, oh my god, the, uh, the Lloyd Lightfoot one?
Yeah.
Whoa.
Was it Crack Mayor?
Yeah, it says, it says Crack Mayor, but then it says, uh, Mayor Crackhead, and it's just like a really unflattering picture of this unfortunate looking person who does suck, but just like, oh man, this is, this is rough.
Lori Lightfoot is the mayor of Sanford and Son.
I wish she was as funny as the Great Red Fox was.
Unfortunately, there ain't nothing funny about her and nothing funny about Chicago.
Like, she's the mayor of this show I liked?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Again, it's just, you're just like too insane.
You're just too, your brain is too fucking scrambled.
And you're like meaning to say something racist because you want to tow that edgy line of racism.
So you say, Oh yeah, she's the mayor of Sanford and Son, which was actually a very good show.
And it was, uh, helmed by one of the greats.
Yeah.
I learned a lot from them.
I'm very inspired by this one of the greats.
Yeah, Melania.
He's got a Melania shirt that just says Melania.
Yeah.
He's got a Morgan Freeman shirt that just says hero on it.
And then the description is Morgan Freeman is an actor I look up to.
I use his methods.
They're so good.
I really like the Jay-Z My Ass one.
Oh, this is so good.
This description is good.
Good.
I don't know.
I don't know what is.
I think it's just like this anti Jay-Z thing, but it's it's an anti rap thing.
So the description says me.
I prefer Skip James, Sly Stone, Charles Mingus, Michael Jackson, to name a few.
Yeah.
But I skip, but Jay-Z my ass.
Yeah.
Amazing.
You know what?
I'm a fan of real black music.
Like nothing past the 1980s.
Yeah.
No thank you.
Before they started doing the rap dancing.
I love that he likes Michael Jackson because if you go to his Nancy Pelosi shirt, it's a shirt of Nancy Pelosi and it just says Michael Jackson across it.
Is it really?
Yeah.
That's awesome.
Yep, that's exactly what it says.
Yep, Michael Jackson.
Who I like, who's one of my favorite artists.
Who I'm into, who I listen to over Jay-Z.
Wow.
Amazing.
I think she just kind of looks like him, I guess is what he's saying.
The last one that I kind of wanted to highlight was the Barack Obama t-shirt.
It's a photo of Barack Obama and on his forehead it says, WHITE BOY!
White boy.
So exactly the same as the Colin Kaepernick shirt, except this one he drew a circle, filled in circle over Obama's nose.
I think To indicate that he's actually, in fact, Obozo.
Obozo.
O- O- Clown.
Obongo the Clown.
Obongo the Clown-o.
It should be said that the model, uh, the mannequin model that he's using to model this t-shirt has her titty out.
So, like, the shirt's pulled down over one of the titties.
And it's, like, pulled down.
It's, like, it's, like, tucked under, like, what would be, like, the cleavage of the underboob of the mannequin boob.
Uh, and then this description was, yeah, one of my favorites.
Uh, if every president before Barack Obama was black, then would Barack Obama have been the first white president?
Think about it.
Think about it.
Uh, so think about that.
Uh-huh.
And then he says, and why do all half black men identify only as black?
I wouldn't.
Yeah, we know.
We know you wouldn't.
We know you wouldn't.
Also, I don't know, maybe it's because you created a culture where that's the choice we actually have to make.
That's what it is.
There's no option B. I don't make it in the club.
Yeah, one of your many, many, many, many great white men decided the one-drop rule.
Yeah, yeah.
Unfortunately, cell phones look like guns against certain backdrops, and we can't control that.
Yeah, why do all half-black men identify as black?
I wouldn't.
I wouldn't.
I wouldn't do it.
If I was me, I wouldn't do it.
I would be white.
You never could, Vincent.
You never could.
Hey, listen.
RIP to you.
I'm different.
I'm sorry, I'm no different.
I would be white and not get targeted by the police.
No, I would not, because I would just listen to them.
So, if anyone watches the movie Shut In, let me know how it is.
I don't think it's very good, probably.
I wish it were.
You know, it's fun to cover these deranged right-wing movies, but got a pretty good back catalog of them.
Interview with the Antichrist being one of the more recent ones.
New Order.
New Order?
Yes.
More on the liberal side of things.
Still very, very Deranged when it comes to, like, class politics?
That's, of course, the one where, what if a bunch of out-of-touch elites, you know, rich people were attacked by their zombie waitstaff?
Yeah, who were brainwashed by being underpaid.
Yeah, what if there were hordes of mindless service workers attacking those wealthy out-of-touch people?
I think they would deserve it, but it would still be scary.
I did feel like, what if class consciousness was your insatiable need for brains?
Yeah, well, I mean, it's a race to the bottom of my stomach.
Yeah, so again, you can support the show at patreon.com slash MinionDeathCult.
That is the way to get access to every episode we've ever done.
There's a lot more content waiting for you there.
You're helping to support the show.
$3.11 a month gets you every bonus episode.
$5 a month gets you every bonus episode, as well as Last Responders, Tony's Body positive, body horror recap podcast.
Yeah, please join the Patreon so that I can spend $666 on this tank top with a picture of Lynette Fromme on it that says the real face of a real environmentalist on it.
From Vincent Gallo, so please subscribe so we can do that.
Appreciate it.
Yeah, if you want to follow us on social media, it's at MinionDeathCult.
I am at Flieldy, F-L-I-E-L-D-Y.
Tony is at WordIsBond.
Say what's up to us there.
Let us know how you liked Shut In when it airs, I think, this week, this Thursday.
