Splitting is a behavior of girls, usually taught by their mothers (clip)
Support the show for $3.11/mo at http://patreon.com/miniondeathcult and get a bonus episode every week, as well as instant access to hundreds of hours of previous episodes. This week a Candy Shop owner posts a helpful want ad to facebook describing all the types of employees he hates (women) and we learn "why God made the small business owner." Also, Mark McCloskey (gated community gun guy) runs for senate in perhaps the most Trumpian bid for office in the last two years.
We've had the know-it-all, the complainer, whiner, lazy, manipulative, roamers, hiders, absent or late, liars.
It's kind of rhyming here.
I identify with so many of these two.
You're like, yep, yep, ding, ding, ding.
Damn, alright, so I wouldn't last long here, you're right.
Check, check.
Uh, I like the idea that, like, uh, he's talking about manipulators.
Like your, like your employees are manipulating, like they're gaslighting you.
I feel like that just means they had a crush on an employee once.
You know?
Yeah.
Yeah.
You came in and you look so pretty every day.
And I knew that, you know, no one comes in the store.
You know, it's only me.
I knew, I knew that something was going on and you took advantage of that to go home early.
Yeah, you were wearing those clothes.
You were wearing those shirts.
You know what you were doing.
And because of that, I let you hang out at the front counter the whole day.
And that's not fair.
That's manipulative.
Only so much candy can fall off the truck, okay?
Manipulative.
Roamers.
Hiders.
I identify with the hider.
That's a sick place to be.
Well, I think a roamer evolves into a hider.
You usually try to look busy, and then you figured out you can just go somewhere where no one can see you.
Totally.
Yeah, the hider is the roamer who got smart.
Yeah, yeah.
There's more people he doesn't like in this list.
Employees, rather, not people.
Sorry, I didn't mean to imply that employees were people.
Roamers, hiders, absent or late, liars, Haters, clock watchers, willful controller, passive aggressor, puker, parentheses, I'll explain in a moment, and worst of all combined, the splitters.
The Splitters!
So this is like, I mean I've been in like Small Business Tyrant Facebook, I've been in like, you know, Worker Mindset Facebook.
I haven't heard a lot of these terms.
I think he's got his own lexicon.
I think he's got his own taxonomy of employees at Goods Candy Shop.
I think he's like, He's like Ignatius J. Reilly in Confederacy of Dunces, where he has his own science of masturbation.
This guy has his own science of categorizing employees that I kind of appreciate.
Yeah, he's learned in it.
He's really taken a study approach to it.
A scholarly approach to it, for sure.
To his small business, yeah.
Yeah, I like Clock Watcher.
Like, the clock, like, oh, oh, so you think just because your shift ends at six, like, that's when you can leave?
Yeah.
Like, what's the Clock Watcher other than that?
I can't... Yeah, literally looking at your watch.
You know?
I do like haters, though.
Haters is a good one.
If you're not a hater, I don't want... I want all my employees to be haters.
Splitters are the worst of all.
Worst of all combined are the splitters.
What's the splitter we're talking about?
Splitting is a behavior of girls, young mostly, but not always, usually taught by their mothers.
This isn't... It's a trait that's been handed down generation from generation.
This is the person who talks about others in an attempt to split people apart and feel better about themselves.
You know, quote, so-and-so said this about you and I couldn't believe it.
So-and-so is so stuck up that she thinks she's better than us.
And so it goes.
This, my friends, is poison in action.
These misguided gals have no end game.
It's just spreading and stirring all the while believing they are innocent.
It's such a common thing among girls.
This is where toxicity and drama find their roots.
There it is.
There it is.
So it's like, I just wanted to apply for a job.
I was just looking at various candy companies' Facebook pages, seeing who was hiring.
Now I'm getting a lesson about life and genders and how girls are bad.
And it's like, wow.
Thank you, Goods Candy Shop.
I just love that some teenage girl just made fun of him so much.
