Support the show for $3.11/month and get bonus episodes every week including full-format episodes and live readings directly in your podcast app at http://patreon.com/miniondeathcult Is it Left-wing romance? Right-wing satire? Discover a far more bewildering truth as we explore My Antifa Lover: A Riot of the Heart
| Time | Text |
|---|---|
| I'm gonna read the description of this book. | |
| A young congresswoman falls in love with a daring masked protester in Seattle, Washington. | |
| After encountering him at a non-violent burning down of a federal building, she can't tell what is hotter, the fire or her feelings developing for him. | |
| So when I first read that description, I was like, okay, this is like... | |
| A Babylon Bee article, a long-form Babylon Bee satire about the non-violent burning of a Trump supporter. | |
| Right? | |
| People are like, they genuinely think this is like pro-Antifa. | |
| This is like written by an Antifa. | |
| So the reviews in the Amazon review section for it are just wonderful. | |
| I will let you as the listener make your own judgment about this. | |
| So this is from Alexandria, our main character's point of view. | |
| This was it. | |
| The big day has finally come. | |
| Today was the hearing of new legislation in a Congress meeting. | |
| Everyone was going to be there, and some new members were also joining who just got elected this year. | |
| I just hope everything goes well and there is no bad blood between anyone at the end of the meeting. | |
| Sounds normal so far. | |
| Peter, Jackson, Michael, and all the other fellow members were going to be there. | |
| We got Peter, Jackson, Michael, Jackson, Peter Jackson, and Michael Jackson. | |
| A new bill was going to be passed today, which has been under discussion for the past month. | |
| A new law was going to be passed, which was undertaking the issues of the divorce rate, increasing day by day in America. | |
| Hopefully this step helps in decreasing the rates of divorce and helping the upcoming generations form a better life. | |
| Okay, so we have here, you know, I guess what's supposed to be our conservative foil to the Antifa lover. | |
| She is concentrating on increased rates of divorce, the decline in traditional marriage, and she's hoping to use government for the one thing that conservatives think it's good for, you know, other than enriching themselves, making sure women won't get divorced from them. | |
| The divorce rates were increasing up to 80% and this was nowhere a reliable source anymore for a safe and secure relationship. | |
| Anyways, I shrugged off all the thoughts in my brain and went into the meeting room after smoothing out my black skirt and sliding my hair down my face. | |
| Let this be a quick and easy meeting. | |
| Dot dot dot. | |
| You know, I'm not a gender essentialist by any means. | |
| So far doesn't really sound like a woman writing this, in my mind. | |
| I slid my hair down my face. | |
| The thing that women like to do and like to write about doing. | |
| I shrugged off all the thoughts in my brain and went into the meeting room. | |
| I took a hot iron and smoothed out my brain before entering the Congress meeting. | |
| Yeah, we did learn from McBee what divorce can drive a man to. | |
| Which is to, what, assault a woman that looks like the judge that ruled over the divorce? | |
| The prose is very good, I agree. | |
| Regardless of the content, the prose is wonderful. | |
| The meeting went well. | |
| After 57 minutes of talking and declaring new ideas and topics, the meeting finally came to an end. | |
| Everything went okay and new legislation was approved which will enforce in decreasing the rates of the growing divorces in America. | |
| The divorces which were mostly made by the husbands in the relationship as per research. | |
| And so the new law enforced the husband to pay 1 million dollars to his wife if he wants to divorce her. | |
| In this way, both the man and the woman will think twice in settling down, and the husband will have to be serious and responsible in the relationship instead of taking it as a joke. | |
| Just, uh, pause for reactions here. | |
| So, we have here A congresswoman concerned with the future of traditional marriage, concerned with increasing divorce rates, and her solution is to fine men $1,000,000 for causing divorces. | |
| What's up, Nico? | |
| Thank you for joining. | |
| This is like the feminist solution to a decline in traditional marriage, which is also, as we know, a feminist issue. | |
| Like, this is like mind-blowing. | |
| I don't know how to understand this. | |
| It's like, oh yeah, there's definitely a problem with declining white birth rates. | |
| Everybody on both sides agree that we need to preserve hope for white children. | |
| Therefore, I'm levying huge tax increases on white men who can't get erections. | |
| Like, the only The only thing that makes sense is this is like conservative cuck fanfiction. | |
| It's like an issue that they genuinely care about that a woman shares their concern and then they're gonna be punished for the thing they care about. | |
| She goes on, I agreed to this matter for the sake of upcoming generations and for personal reasons as well, which I didn't want to think about right now. | |
| Cool, thank you very much, Jessica Strange. | |
| Okay, so, cut forward to a press conference going on outside of the Congress House, which is how it's described throughout this novel. | |
| The Congress House exterior press conference. | |
| Huge number of protesters. | |
| Most of the boys had banners which said things like, quote, equal rights for men. | |
| Quote, women can be free, but men must pay one million dollars to be free? | |
| Quote, I can leave someone whenever I want. | |
| Quote, feminists are screwed. | |
| I furrowed my eyebrows when I realized how men were extremely against this law. | |
| I was informed that this would happen, but not to this intensity. | |
| In head, it seemed like no big deal. | |
| If you don't want to be with someone, don't marry them. | |
| And when you do marry them, you shouldn't just leave them like you wanted a taste. | |
| You should be loyal to them. | |
| And all the boys protesting made me think that they were against this law because they wanted to screw whoever they liked, marry whoever they wanted, and leave the girl when she gets old and useless. | |
| My blood boiled when I thought about what happened to my sister. | |
| Passing this bill had a big contribution to what had happened to my sister and I wasn't going to back on this law no matter what. | |
| The mic was passed on to another person in the crowd who wanted to ask a question. | |
| My eyes immediately noticed his piercing blue eyes and black cap. | |
| He had a dark green loose jacket on and I swear even hiding behind that cap his eyes didn't fail to catch my attention. | |
| Miss Alexandria, my question is directed to you. | |
| He started to speak, and as soon as his eyes landed on me, I somehow forgot about all of the crowd. | |
| It was like we were the only two people in the hall. | |
| His eyes had so much depth in them that I felt like I could never hide from his gaze, even if I tried. | |
| They were accusing, haunting, mesmerizing, and somehow I felt insecure under his gaze. | |
| Quote, Would you have passed this bill if you ever a man? |